#like that 'im not white im nonbinary' mindset | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nerves-nebula · 7 months

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hi there, i want to ask about your usage of it/its pronouns, sorry if this might make you uncomfortable or if its weird or confusing

are your it/its pronouns any different from it/its pronouns for an object? I don't know how to word it sorry, I'm just trying to understand more about other types of pronouns

It’s fine. They aren’t different from an objects it/its to me, because objects & animals & concepts aren’t inherently inferior to humans, so I wouldn’t really mind being in the same group as them conceptually.

It’s a mindset I haven’t fully gotten into but I’m trying to rework the way I see the world, inspired partially by the things I’ve heard native Americans say. Like, I am not better than the food I eat because I’m human. A bear isn’t better than me because they can eat me & kill me. Humans are a part of the earth and would do best to work inside of it and with it than to try to control it or put ourselves on a higher level than it’s other creatures.

I mean clearly we can’t be all that much smarter & more important, what with what we’ve got going on.

But anyway, my pronoun change was at first honestly just the most logical conclusion.

Here’s my train of thought: I didn’t like he or she, Im not a man or a woman. and they/them don’t tell you anything about my gender. If you hear someone call me they/them you aren’t even gonna know I have a weird gender!

Similar to how man and woman are genders, but Non-binary isn’t. Non-binary just describes what you aren’t, its an umbrella term not (inherently) a specific gender. it’s very broad and most nonbinary people I’ve seen & met still identify in parts with man and woman. They/them is so vague that no one would bat an eye if you slipped in a they while describing a cis person who clearly reads as their assigned gender.

And I’m too forgetful & lazy to use neopronouns so, it/it’s was the natural choice. It’s easier to integrate because people already use it/it’s for stuff all the time.

And see, here’s the thing: I have a gender, I’m not vague or in between or a mix. And it’s much closer to like, the idea of a Third Gender. This was something that frustrated me a lot in high school because I would go looking for labels and most of them were about proximity to manhood & womanhood. Or about being agender or neutral. Or about concepts I fully did not relate to. I am not one of those things.

Another issue I had was that a lot of these gender labels had “-gender” at the end which doesn’t make sense to me at all. It’s not mangender and womangender so I didn’t vibe with this naming scheme.

I was also hesitant to use a label a white person made because I’d noticed that white people kind of have a different experience with nonbinary gender than people like me.

Luckily I found the perfect label! Maverique! It had no weird -gender suffix and it was made by a black person who created it online after realizing neutral/agender didn’t fit right.

And yea so it/its is a signifier of me as a third thing. not male, not female, not neutral or in between or lacking gender- just a different kind of person.

And this isn’t even getting into all the ways that I related to monsters in media, which were frequently called by it/it’s pronouns. Or how being abused factors into seeing myself as a non human THING and how embracing that makes me feel much more alive & like a person.

So yea, that’s the run down :)

#nnstuff #ask #it pronouns #trans #nonbinary #transgender #queer

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tscritical · 1 year

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In regards to the complaint about thomas’s “i hate men” video

1. Someone should ask if he hates trans men too i wanna c how he responds

2. A big pet peeve of mine is ppl saying they hate men. Like im sorry were you not just gushing about how much u liked this one guy? Are you including yourself in this group too? Ur not a feminist. And dont pretend you are because that makes actual feminists look bad. Feminism is preaching equality. You’re preaching mindless hate because you think its woke and defending it with a victim mindset.

Anyway life lesson everyone sucks, men, women, nonbinary folks, gay, straight, black white whatever. everyone freaking sucks. But hate breeds more hate so i love them anyway

Ty for coming to my ted talk

“everyone sucks but i love humanity anyway” is so much more powerful than “women are flawless and men are gross”

#asks #ts critical #ts criticism

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mil-liminal · 2 years

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What would be your favorite queer horror media?

Oh Boy So i think this question is just asking what type of media i enjoy and to answer that I will say Movies, though i'll admit it is hard for me to sit down and consume any kind of media, i have to be in a right mindset for it.

HOWEVER since we are here, I also think its asking what my FAVORITE thing is, and honestly I want to answer this one with a huge wonderful list of amazing things for you to consume, i feel like there could be and should be so much more, which..i guess with Mil-Liminal is kinda what im trying to do, but lets get into some things that might fall under the genre that i enjoy.

Of course the Welcome to Nightvale podcast, was probably my first big experience with queer media in the spooky or weird genre, and also one of the first i experienced with wholesome queer rep instead of just bury your gays tropes all over the place.

Wildelife, Lies Within and Black Water (right here on tumblr) all have queer rep and are comics i personally enjoy!

Heres some movies i think could fit the question, I'm picking my personal faves, and trying to pick some that might not be AS well known as any old rotten tomatoes list ya know?

first off, She Creature, which is pretty old, but who doesn't like scary mermaids and wlw relationships? its a strange movie and i haven't watched it in ages but worth a visit for a fun spooky perspective.

There might be some who will fight me on this, but Let The Right One In. I understand as a nonbinary person that there are themes that are problematic in the film, but i also understand this was one of the first time i saw someone just a little bit like me on screen in a horror film. so im counting it. (also i should clarify that i mean the 2008 version, not the American remake.)

The Hunger. Listen, its got Bowie in it as a vampire. 'nuff said.

All Cheerleaders must Die. Its just fun ok? I love camp and i love gay camp.

Im going to add ParaNorman because it is SUCH a good movie, and its almost the only time ive seen a cartoon go there without making it a bad joke.

the Fear Street trilogy is fun. fight me.

Bride of Frankenstein(1939)! The Haunting(1963)! Fright Night(1985)!

And finally, ok so I personally am not a big reader, but i consulted one of my best pals who is a librarian (as well as the editor for Seemingly Dark and Mil-Liminal!) @lesbrarians, and here is what they had to say!

'The Luminous Dead by Caitlin Starling (sci-fi horror)

The Cabin at the End of the World by Paul Tremblay (afaik Tremblay isn't queer himself, but I still love his stuff and this one was great) White is for Witching by Helen Oyeyemi (gothic horror, v much in the vein of Shirley Jackson)

Sodom Road Exit by Amber Dawn (supernatural thriller plus family drama)

The Taking of Jake Livingston by Ryan Douglass (obvs every one of these has some kind of tw attached to it bc cmon, it's horror, but massive tw here for school shootings, it's heavy af and you gotta be in the right frame of mind for it obvs, but it's fantastic)

Alice Isn't Dead by Joseph Fink (set in the world of WtNV!)

Wilder Girls by Rory Powers (body horror galore)

The Gilda Stories by Jewelle Gomez (bisexual vampires)

Into the Drowning Deep by Mira Grant (mermaids but make it horror)

Honorary mentions to Jawbone by Monica Ojeda and Summer Sons by Lee Mandelo (only because I haven't read them yet haha, they sound dope) Oh, and Sawkill Girls by Claire Legrand, haven't read it yet myself either but I've heard nothing but good things! CARMEN MARIA MACHADO Her Body and Other Parties! The Lamb Will Slaughter the Lion and The Barrow Will Send What May by Margaret Killjoy -- trans punk anarchists facing down demons!' -quoted from discord lmao

ANNNND there you have it. You probably werent expecting all that but horror IS my thing after all, and i thought it would be fun to give a in depth fully fledged reply. Now tell me Readers, Listeners and Watchers, do you have any recs for me?

-Caro

#Caro Speaks #queer rep #horror genre #queer horror

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mogai-sunflowers · 2 years

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Maybe im too meh about alot of things and this is kind of a vent

but i honestly hate that nowadays (mostly white) people wont reblog an important post about privilage in society or a post with links about a crisis cause the op dosent 100% align with someone elses opinions despite the fact that post has nothing to do with it. Like awhile back i saw a black person's post spreading around a bunch of super important links regarding the buffalo shooting and how to help the families just to see some white mogai individual refuse to mess with the post and yell at their other (white and poc) muturals for reblogging it cause op didnt specfically support emojipronouns. Like i understand that that makes them nbphobic and emoji pronouns are important but there is a bigger issue here that is very important. They refuse to support people unless they can slide themselves into their perfect image of a perfect progressive person which is why it takes so long for news to meet this community.

Im not saying you should never vet your sources and you should give notes to bigots but when it comes down to huge issues like racism, mysogny and communally-external lgbtphobia, wether or not that one person likes mspec lesbians, endogenic systems or neopronouns dosent really matter. Its about information reaching as many people as possible, the rest is infighting smaller issues that are very niche and dont matter in comparison. Im a poc, i use neopronouns, im an mspec lesbian and im a collective but im not gonna pretend someone whose only exclusionary view is not liking pnc gays/lesbians to a raging racist. Our community needs a bit of reality check concerning what is big issues and what is small issues and the mogai/liom communities are an echo chamber wether we like it or not. Internet discourse and national law are 2 very different problems and i see alot of abled white people conflating the 2 because they get all their news and live their lives on tumblr. I know because i used to do that, once tumblr wasnt my main app anymore, i learned alot more about the world around me.

I'm not saying you or anyone else is over-reacting btw, im just tired of seeing people comparing xenogenderphobes locking people out of nonbinary servers to anti-immigration laws and Trump's walls. There significantly more damage from one than the other and the comparison is always done by someone who only faces the lesser issue.

Ill just sign myself off as 🌿

i completely agree. i've seen this before too and it pisses me the fuck off, like I saw a Black person talking about fandom racism and how to support Black people in fandoms, and people were like "but they dont support bi lesbians" and it's like??? okay yeah that sucks but that's not relevant to the actual issue here and it's very disrespectful to ignore someone's input on their own oppression just because they have one opinion you don't like. like, just the other week, a bunch of white queer people started attacking a Native Two-Spirit trans guy who was talking about what's currently going on regarding the ICWA, and this person was reblogging the post saying not to listen to him because he asked not to be called queer because he thought it was a slur and im like. get out of your fucking ASS jesus fucking CHRIST. and im not like, saying that to try and distance myself from whiteness, i've caught myself having that kind of chronically online mindset before and had to evaluate myself. just agreeing with you anon, it's massively stupid the way people, especially in the mogai community, prioritize interneet discourse over things like structural racism and queerphobia. it's bullshit.

#🌌written in the stars ; asks 🌌#racism discussion #ask to tag

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garlique · 3 years

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god i think about this tik tok all the time like i couldn't explain it if i tried and i would never want to try because i KNOW it would never come out right but like. yes i may be a trans man. yes first and foremost inside i will always be a black woman. you know??

#the black woman's experience is so fucked!!! and i will always have that mindset!!!#like i will always be viewing the world through the eyes of a black woman. always #ive noticed tho its a v specific subset of black transmascs that think like this but i haven't really identified the pattern #i think it's the ones who a. transitioned later b. are more open with the gender and disclosure #and like. the black girls who were forced to BE black women at a very young age #which is of course every black girl we don't get childhoods #and its just like... idk #like i will always be looking out of myself as a black woman #i think it also for me comes to the fact that my Black identity comes before my gender identity #and i think it comes from my nonthreateningness/openly gay self?#and i think also it's because like. so much of the real Black Power / Revolution / Struggle work comes from Black women #and i want to be involved in that #jaylen was talking abt the gender divide in black movements in class the other day and like honestly #black mean really do not be picking up the cause!!! they do not be doing the work!!! its all black women!!!!#so idk. its very complicated. ive never explained it to anyone i mentioned it to cait once n thats it #like i dont know any other black trans men i could talk to about this #idk. i wonder a lot if this feeling is part of why im so insistent on iding as nonbinary?#who knows tho every idea i have of my gender is filtered through SUCH a white western colonial view #i dunno!!! anyway !!! sorry i know most a yall probly arent black so dw about this lol

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metalheadsforblacklivesmatter · 2 years

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hey, so. im just here to ask a couple questions. the last tiktok you posted (the one about white women) has really stuck with me and made me think. though i dont identify as a woman, i was raised afab in a white family and i can see a lot of things happening that were talked about in the video. the sexual exploitation part really hit me, because i was taught (intentionally or not) that my body is my greatest and only valuable asset. this in turn has led to the majority of my sexual trauma, and it made me outraged that something like that could have been prevented if i wasnt taught to dress myself up and make myself appealing to white men. thank you for posting this. it changed my perspective on a lot of things. i specifically want to know how i can prevent the mindsets described in the video and become a better ally, and how i can avoid overshadowing poc issues with my own. i want to be a more considerate person in that sense. thanks for spreading valuable information. bye 👋

Hey!

White AFAB nonbinary here. @yinx1 might have more input as a Black woman.

Obviously I'm not the last say here as a white "woman" (calling myself a woman because that's how society perceives me). If any women of color want to add to this, I'll reblog you.

But, here's what I do to try to be a better ally.

First of all, if I have a platform, I share it. Yinx is the other admin here. I don't do that to get kudos or anything. I just do it because as a white "woman" I know I'm incapable of talking about intersectional issues to the depth that they deserve. (Also Yinx is super sweet, and deserves a platform.)

Second of all, if I see women of color speaking about sexism, I shut up. In a conversational setting, I may ask questions or say something to show I'm listening. If it's on social media like this blog, I may add to what they say with sources. Not to "whitesplain" their issues, but to just be like "She had a good point, and I did some research. Here's some more information I learned."

Third. Any like personal pieces or articles about BIPOC issues, I only share if person that wrote it fits into the community they're talking about. So, for instance if it's an article about the appropriation of braids, that's a Black issues, and I'll only share if the person that wrote it is Black. I'll also do the same with religious practices.

Fourth. Any Black women that have good feminism content? I'll try to boost they're blogs. Tell people to follow them. Dig through their blog for content I like. You'll see a few people I frequently reblog are Black women. Sometimes, things don't need me to say them. If someone more knowledgeable than me says something, I just let them say it. I also, obviously, follow them.

Fifth. If I'm talking about feminist issues, I try to stay away from the "white woman" perspective. My knee-jerk reaction to abortion bans is what a lot of white women are saying (I know that women aren't the only ones effected by the abortion issue, but women are the topic of this post). "My body, my choice." Which is great and all, but that's putting white women at the center of the conversation and not looking at how it effects anyone else.

Did you know that women of color are the ones most effected by abortion bans? Not many people know that. Because white women always have the center stage in feminism, and they only ever make it about themselves. As white "women" we've got to acknowledge that and look at feminism from an intersectional lense. Not just "how does this effect me?" But take a few minutes to do research on how this effects Black women or Latino women or Indigenous women, or literally any other group of women.

Most importantly. FOLLOW WOMEN OF COLOR. YOU SEE CONTENT A WOMAN OF COLOR MADE THAT TEACHES YOU SOMETHING? SHARE IT.

I swear. If I see a woman of color (that's not a TERF) posting stuff about how sexism effects her, specifically? Immediate follow. Scroll through her blog reblog or queue anything I can. Because I want to learn, and she's teaching. Great.

Also important, put your money where your mouth is. Buy from women if color wherever possible. Donate to organizations that benefit them. If there's a woman of color that's it there teaching and you love her content and you find it she has a store? Check it out. Maybe buy something to show your support.

Hope this helps!

-fae

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angelsaxis · 3 years

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Hey my dude, i’m not sure if you care but i’m a bit concerned because the idea that bi women and lesbians have a distinct and separate history is both inaccurate and distinctly rad-fem rhetoric. Bigots are’t checking gay cards before harrassing or abusing queer people to make sure they’re using the correct slur for you, you know? It would be nice if there were these clear cut words, but there really aren’t. Even words like butch and femme which are associated now with lesbians used to also be commonly used by gay men. The division of the community is very recent.

I understand the shared history aspect, but we also need to go based off what’s happening now in today’s times--also Im not sure femme necessarily stopped being used by gay men? I might have gotten the spelling wrong. But like femme gay men exist, and I know butch is used by gay men as well.

Historically, maybe dyke meant any woman who was attracted to women or appeared attracted to women--so women who dressed even the slightest bit unfemininely or didn’t act straight enough. But just like how the f-slur refers to gay men (and I think trans women but that’s not something Im knowledgeable of) now, dyke refers to lesbians now. Like we have shared and separate experiences because of our sexualities and our ability to love women, but not everything is shared between the communities.

And about the “homophobes dont ask before using the slur they want” it’s because those homophobes are assuming you’re a lesbian. The vast majority of homophobes don’t even have a grasp on bisexuality, and they very strongly associate literally any attraction to women as inherently lesbian, even if you’re bi. Their not asking doesn’t mean that it applies to you, it just means you’re being violently mislabeled.

Basically, they’re not asking specifically cause they don’t care; they’re going to “accuse” you of being a lesbian and then treat you like any homophobe would based off of that. Like....a slur simply being used against you doesn’t mean you get to use it. I’m nonbinary. If I was called the t slur that doesn’t mean that I get to use it because it’s been a word specifically for binary trans people (from my own observations). If a nonbinary person was clocked as a trans man or woman and called the t slur, it’s an incorrect assumption with a violent reaction based off that assumption. But that doesn’t mean that now all nb people can reclaim or use the t slur.

I’ve been called any number of non applicable slurs--that doesn’t mean I get to start using the r-slur or f-slur or anything else. That’s how we end up getting nonblack people saying the hard r n word, because they think being called a “desert/sand n--” mean they actually get to say the second word. They don’t.

And finally--we can’t ignore the racial aspect of it, which you left out of your ask. A lot of intracommunity drama that didn’t exist before is created by white queer people. A lot of white queer people feel their relevance slipping. They’re still the face of the gay community, but qpoc are tired of it and starting to shift focus to themselves. The entire point of that post was to call out the mindset of white bisexual women for trying to force a word that at least now has a set definition back to/into something it isn’t. Dyke originated from “bull dyke” which was used originally in the BLACK LESBIAN subcultures of Harlem. Literally a quick google search will tell you as much. Dyke belonged to Black lesbians before spreading to all lesbians.

I see the same thing happening with stud too. A “stud” is a Black lesbian. White lesbians are trying their absolute hardest to take that word too. it’s cultural appropriation--the term, the style of dress, and the mannerisms because I guess middle class white boy/frat aesthetics weren’t enough for them. This just leads us back to the race analysis of the use of dyke. Current application is to all lesbians, but in the past it was Black lesbians. A lot of the insistence on this and other words being for everyone with the broadest definition possible is by white queers, and that was the point of my post.

#long post #discourse tw #d slur #i guess?#idk #ask to tag #but here's the (really) long and short of it #please don't ignore the entire dissertation I wrote on race to accuse me of spreading radfem rhetoric it's not a good look for you #like esp considering the racism in radfeminism....it just looks like you're ignoring that about them too to talk about history #which was probably the smallest part of my little post because this was mainly about #race and modern times

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oodlezsinbin · 4 years

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im proud of u for coming to terms with what pronouns you like to use!!! you definitely dont need to experience dysphoria of any kind of be trans!! plus being nonbinary is a subset of being trans (the white stripe in the flag is there for nonbinary people, as said by the creator of the flag) but i also know multiple nonbinary people who dont use the term trans for themselves even if by definition they are trans. just a preference thing! anyway ppl can be trans even w/out dysphoria so just do you!

Thank you! That's sort of my thoughts on the matter too, but I wouldn't use trans as a label for myself, personally. I've heard a lot of different things from ppl so I try not to engage too much in talks about "how trans" someone needs to be before they can really be "considered" trans. Quite frankly, I think it just comes down to the person in question coming to terms how they identify. I just keep an open mind about this stuff. I don't see why ppl would fake something like this for attention or why ppl would assume someone is faking for attention so whenever I hear anyone talk like that I'm kinda like aaa,, so maybe that's a factor in why it took me so long because I was like. What If I'm Faking Too? But I I don't see the point in that, tbh. So I'm like not tryina preach to anyone but I think that's a bad mindset to have because it makes people weary of you.

In other news, I don't have an official label for myself yet, I'll think more on that probably but I appreciate the support

#ask #sorry for talking so much on this it's kind of been on my mind

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sundrenched-smilez · 5 years

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I see your 'here's a lot!' and raise you: 1, 3-6, 10-13, 17-19, 21, 23, 25

1. what is your gender?

dainty + bubbly

sharp

ethereal

decadent

3. what is your gender presentation like?

being genderfluid, it’s difficult tbh, and i dont always know what my gender is at any given moment? only what feels Wrong and Uncomfy. so i just gotta trial and error until i get tired of doing that and give up, or i find smth good. this can take several minutes expressing the above feelings and aesthetics is essentially my gender pres

4. what is your Gender Euphoria Outfit?

d+b - smth flowy, soft, traditionally more girly and femme

sharp - punk, black and spiky. metal helps, so do bracelets, and sometimes eyeliner done to a point. mb a lil slutty, but for me, not for others. tank tops, torn clothing, showing skin

ethereal - the above, but more adorned and colorful? like rly unique and confident looks. less edges, more fae

decadent - like shirts w ruffles on them, feeling like a pirate or an old century princess, loose clothes, fancy clothes, feeling a lil like royalty or thinking highly of myself. mb more animated w my actions, more dancy

5. what makes you feel validated?

ppl using my pronouns, or telling their friends “oh look at that person, theyr’e goals/theyre pretty/so hot, etc” and impressing ppl w my beauty and style that way.

ppl not knowing what genitals i have, or being confused on that front!! like i’ve told ppl im on hormones n they assumed T instead of estrogen, and that’s fun. kinda like how u like to confuse ppl

6. top five favorite parts of your body (n why you love them)?

thighs!! they’re rly good n have recently gotten thiccer bc i put on weight, and that makes me happy c:

i have a cute butt!!

boobs, bc ive always wanted them, nd i have them now, nd im big sexy

legs, esp when shaven, bc that always feels nice. so does my tummy, it’s rl soft

i love my eyes so much, they’re such a dark, deep warm brown!!! they rllllyyy pop when i wear eyeliner w them, and im always consistently happy abt them c: i also have good lips, nd suuuuper soft skin

im cheating but i also rly adore my hair, it gets rly curly sometimes, and i love that abt it

10. do you have any trans pride merch?

i dont!! i have a gay flag in my room tho c:

11. recent happy trans moment?

at work yesterday, i had mentioned customers probs find me offputting bc im tall and trans, and my friend josh who i work w, was like “use that to your advantage!! I know that sounds weird, but when i wear a flower crown, it’s easier to sell to ppl, bc im the Bubbly Gay” and i was like “hi, i dont have the genitals you think i do, please buy my fragrance” in a deadpan voice, n cracked him and my manager up

12. favorite trans headcanon?

samus aran from metroid being trans!! shes powerful and unstoppable, and i love her

13. favorite canon trans character? (alt: 2nd favorite trans headcanon?)

i rly love elliot from On A Sunbeam, but also alex fierro from the magnus chase series!!! she’s never afraid to let ppl know when her pronouns have changed (genderfluid) and she’s out and proud, and promotes “flaunting the weird” or unique, and she always wears pink n green, which is cool. like everyone was in white snow suits for camouflage, and she still had a pink/green one somehow, nd it was rly silly

17. something you wish you could tell your younger self?

brush ur teeth more, also dont worry, ppl will love ur dick and wont bash u for having one. you’ll have friends that love and want to b around u

18. what would your Ideal Fashion Look be?

i rly want that rose dress i drew on zuretta, mb i’ll try sewing one when i have money

19. (how) does your gender relate to your sexuality?

if u like me, ur gay, and also i rly want someone (partner wise) to call me their flame, bc that would b rly affirming and gay. like im an urban/modern pirate witch who strolls into town on odd full moons, bringing lavish gifts and showering my love in affection, sex, and laughteri like the concept of sex more than actual sex, but u know,,,, some gay thoughts

21. what makes you feel euphoric?

when i can express my genders the way i want to, or express/hold myself in a way that rly makes me all !!!!!! inside

like a firm and steady connection, resonating in my aesthetic like a beacon or a lightning strike; powerful, brimming with energy, and certainty.

23. claim something as trans culture.

running a joke into the ground until it's unrecognizable from what the original one was (i’m about to end this man’s whole career > me, about to fight someone “i’m about to end this man” >me answering if i’ve entered the building yet “i’m about to” > me, when i’m a muscle underneath someone’s stomach fat “i’m ab”)

editing ur friends into memes

25. what’s your favorite part of being trans?

tbh i dont rly identify as trans, just nb, bc ive always felt nonbinary; used to b rly grossed out by being called anything masculine, felt uncomfortable to take my shirt off from the age of like 6, in public spaces. called myself an individualso like im definitely not cis but i’ve always been nonbinary, so i dont feel the need to categorize myself into like “someone who isn’t as they used to be” if that makes sense.

plus idk, uncomfy term for me specifically, doesn’t feel right. same w transfeminine, like im androgynous in the first place, and if i were feminine, i dont see the need 2 arbitrarily add trans in front of it, as if to say “im artificial”obvs those terms r affirming for others, and im rly happy abt that and encourage them to use em, but for me its just like. mmm. thats how it feels, a lil nasty nd not me. wrong, ig? feelings. its 1 am almost so im in a slightly off mindset, but also fine bc i just took like a big nap from 3:30ish to 8no gender roles, im free of constriction and can dress however tf i want bc fuck fashion trends? its just money in the pocket of a corporation. now i do like fashion, but only in that i love to see how ppl express themselves, not so much following trends and rules abt it. it’s better to b unique and have ur own style, what makes u u, what makes u comfy and happily expressed

#abt me #cassette tapes #asks

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crimsonrevolt · 7 years

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Congratulations Snow you’ve been accepted to Crimson Revolt as Dirk Cresswell!

↳ please refer to our character checklist

It’s always so amazing to me that so many people choose to come back to Crimson and it’s such a joy to see your Dirk come back to life in your app! I know I speak for many when I say that you took a character that none of us knew much about and brought with him a personality that we couldn’t forget. It’s so good to see you again and that you’ve found the time to come back to the rp! Snow, your reason for choosing him, in particular, made me emotional, and I can’t wait to see you write him with a fresh breath of life! Hopefully, you’ll be able to carry him on a new and beautiful journey as the war progresses and affects him. I can’t wait to see you and Dirk back on the dash!

application beneath the cut ( tw: brief mentions of death )

OUT OF CHARACTER

INTRODUCTION

Snow, 21, she/her, gmt+3

ACTIVITY

im going to well and truly throw myself into my studies this semester, and i’m also running an rp with a friend of mine on tumblr, so i don’t know how active i’ll be honestly. given how much i already love and adore every member of this group and all your characters, i’ll be able to find time. 6 or 5 out of ten, i think.

TRIGGERS

*removed for privacy

HOW DID YOU FIND US?

a promo blog about a year ago lol. i found this group way before it even opened but only applied like, months afterwards.

WHAT HARRY POTTER CHARACTER DO YOU IDENTIFY WITH MOST?

hm. my answer differs every time based on my mood i think. like i dont think there’s one character i really truly identify with? probably percy tho lbr.

ANYTHING ELSE?

nope.

IN CHARACTER

DESIRED CHARACTER

dirk cresswell. well, a revised version of him.

FACE CLAIM

ezra miller. listen i tried to change his fc but ezra is dirk and dirk is ezra the line has been blurred for ages now it is beyond my control.

REASON FOR CHOSEN CHARACTER

i’d thought of coming back with a different character and had gone through a host of them in the open tag. i’d considered someone on the other end of the spectrum to counteract the experience i’ve had playing dirk. i’d thought of playing someone balanced and sophisticated and well-mannered, someone with a little less emotion and a little more poise. someone who is not dirk, but dirk seems to have stuck himself all the way down to the roots and i can’t seem to get him out.

i cannot properly express in words how much i love this character. i’m floundering for the right ways to lay it out. he is a myriad of unlikely contradictions – kind, and just, and cruel. he is optimism and realism hand-in-hand, but he is just as much that as he is full of lies. half truths, denials, secrets. he is honest and genuine, and his intentions are as pure as those of a noble knight but he strikes quick, and fast, and merciless, with the harsh finality of an execution.

he loves openly. he is never shying away from expressing his love and devotion for his friends and family. he is never afraid of what his love for them would do to him, or to them – no, he is afraid: the fear of losing someone who’d rooted themselves into the crevices of his life is numbing, almost all-consuming, but dirk has never known how to not love, how to not be so open towards them so much of the time.

and even then, it feels, to him, as though he is never without something to hide. as though he is never not carrying a secret of some sort, as though there is always something he is carefully folding to the side throughout his life, as though he has never been fully honest with another person before. the thing is, he is always open about the good parts of himself – he is loud and obnoxious about his love and his optimism, he is blazing and boisterous about his successes and achievements. he is almost always alone in his losses. he has become terribly adept in being both honest and not, at once.

he does not forgive. he is fearful of trust, of betrayal, of being left in the dust once again. he loves, he loves, he loves, but he does not trust quite as freely.

i’d focused much too much on his guilt and misery when i had played him last, but i’m hoping to be able to focus more this time on some good things in his life. which will probably not last very long lbr but im excited to see for myself.

PREFERRED SHIPS // CHARACTER SEXUALITY // GENDER & PRONOUNS

dirk is an utter, unbelievably obnoxious, hopeless romantic. he is nineteen years old and had known he is gay for years, the wizarding world being far more relaxed about such things than where he’d come from, but only in the last few years or so had he become relaxed enough to be open about his sexuality to more than just the people he trusts. the idea of finding a committed, long term partner – male partner – is only just beginning to settle itself within him. he is only now beginning to truly see himself with a future in perhaps a domestic fashion and, despite the times they live in, he is positively giddy. it’s embarrassing. really.

dirk is a cis male character, though i’d really like to see how he would interact with a trans and/or nonbinary character and how he might find solace with someone who, while perhaps not exactly like him, falls far from the conventional lines drawn up by the social structures they live in.

CREATE ONE (OR MORE!) OF THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR CHARACTER:

traits:

+ TALENTED:

Dirk’s magical talents were difficult to miss, even to those who really, really tried, and it was not entirely for the considerable amount of bragging on Dirk’s part – though, arguably, that was a large part of it – but his hands, deft with potions and charms and defensive spells, were quick to catch people’s attention, and keep it. his exceptional dueling skills had not gone unnoticed, either, not by his teachers, and certainly not by his pureblooded schoolmates, who have repeatedly tested his abilities first hand.

+SOCIABLE:

Dirk is That One Kid that knows everyone, and who everyone knows. He joined every extracellular activity the school had to offer at one point or another, he never missed a chance to hang out and have fun, and he was always interested in meeting new people and making new friends. His easy humor and confident attitude drew people to him and relaxed them in his company, his optimism and cheeky remarks making him an uplifting presence to have around. He is secretive, however, keeping his emotional troubles and inner demons far away from prying eyes, even those he considers close.

-TRUST ISSUES:

Dirk has been shown love and taught not to trust it. a parting gift, from his mother, one could say. he finds difficulty – immense difficulty – in sharing his troubles, or his secrets of any kind, with anyone. he loves and he cares about his friends and there is very little he wouldn’t do for them, but trust is something that is difficult to come by, for him, and it is something that frustrates his friends to no end.

-ARROGANT:

Dirk has an exaggerated sense of his own abilities. He is talented, yes, anyone would be hard pressed to deny that, but he tends to – overestimate, what he can do. It could also be put down to his perfectionist nature, that he would bite off more than he could chew and simply expect himself to rise up to the challenge.

he is so confident in the caliber of his character, in his own moral righteousness, in his ability to tell right from wrong. he believes so completely in aversio and what they stand for and in the choices he’s made, that he is right, that he is good, that what they’re doing is entirely justified to a morally correct eye. his arrogance and his pride, just as his loyalty and his bravery and everything good in his heart, have led him down a path of darkness where the torch of his anger has lit the way so brightly he cannot see the blackness of his surroundings. he is a morally grey character with a black and white mindset.

——

Mockblog: dorkcresswxll.tumblr.com

IN CHARACTER QUESTIONNAIRE

♔ If you were able to invent one spell, potion, or charm, what would it do, what would you use it for or how would you use it? Feel free to name it:

he squints, tilts his head, leans back on the back of his feet. “just one?” he asks, and straightens up as a thought occurs to him. there’s the beginning of a grin pulling at his lips, something of boyish mischief coloring his features. “something to, to take care of pureblooded bigots. y’know, take care of ‘em. actually, all bigots, y’know, all at once.” he shrugs, hands shoved into his pockets, boyish grin spreading across his face. giddy. “i’d call it the purifier, just for kicks.”

♔ You have to venture deep into the Forbidden Forest one night. Pick one other character and one object (muggle or magical), besides your wand, that you’d want with you:

“Sal!” a burst of laughter, involuntary, and he leans forward. “did you see her swing that wretched bat of hers? i’d take her with me to that Snake Supreme if i could, she’d bash his head in and cuss up a storm and everything, she’s good at making a big fuss.” the fond gleam in his eyes is unmissed by any, there is pride in his voice when he speaks of her, of his sister. he does not attempt to hide it. “and – and food for the object, i think, that’d work out pretty well, yeah?”

♔ What kinds of decisions are the most difficult for you to make?

“when to take a bloody break.” he huffs, annoyed, and perhaps a touch embarrassed. “i still don’t know how to do that.”

♔ What is one thing you would never want said about you?

that he is weak, that he is lesser, that he isn’t good enough. that he is just as bad as those he fights to rid the world of, that he is worst. that he is amoral, immoral, that he is unjust and evil and simply a murderer.

he hums. thoughtful. for a moment. “that i can’t take a loss well. which, mind you, is ridiculous – i never lose anyway!”

WRITING SAMPLE

it wasn’t difficult to get the old man to sign his letter – it wasn’t difficult, he’d not needed any convincing, all dirk had to do was thrust the form under his nose, pen in hand and a flat look upon his face: stiff, clunky, the way he only ever is with his father anymore.

the man looks up from the book between his palms, his sharp nose striking, his slanted eyes lifting towards his son. there is a crease between his brows as he pulls the paper from the young boy’s hands, eyes over ink before he asks what this is.

“it’s a permission form.” he sounds nervous. he hates it. “for hogsmeade.” he says, “you’re supposed to sign it.”

and the man signs it. just like that, he reads the paper and he signs it – he hangs on to it for a moment before giving it back. there is something there, something he wants to say, but his father was never good with words and so he says nothing. dirk is pathetically grateful – he never seems to say the right thing when his dad is involved, either.

dirk takes the paper and shifts his weight between his feet and isn’t sure if he should just leave – there is something there he wants to say, as well, but he can’t quite grasp the words and so he mulls about for a moment more, shifting the paper in his hand, before he nods a quick ‘thank you’ and scurries away.

he stuffs the paper in his pocket as he walks away. he stuffs his guilt down too, and tries not to think about it – he’d been avoiding his dad all summer, had only spoken to him now when he needed something, and not for the first time he wonders how it’s gotten this bad. he wonders when it’s gotten so tense between them they can’t share more than a few words before something made someone snap. he wonders what made it so, what caused this wide, gaping chasm to stretch between them – but he can’t think about that without thinking about emptied rooms and funeral marches, so he shakes his head quickly and bursts into Sal’s room.

They have much planned for the rest of the day, and there’s only so much of summer left for them to enjoy.

#Accepted App

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bfjwmckenfenmw · 4 years

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we aren’t just our bodies and our faces. we are actual, thinking, feeling, human beings inside. and we are incredibly diverse.

i didnt start off with having dysphoria. sometimes, seldom, something creeps up on me. but i dont really have dysphoria, in general. the revelation of being trans, a boy, simply came over me at some point, starting with figuring out my sexuality (wait, im gay for guys) and then realizing that trying to be a girl was an empty effort. it lead to nothing. but then, since the whole gender revolution nonbinary movement wasnt a big thing back then, i got really discouraged, by everyone, to become myself. people ignored my identity, to even have a chance of being called by the right pronouns, i’d have to behave super manly. apparentely, taking hormones, transitioning, was the only thing that would make people see me. only then my life would get better, but people would continue to discriminate against me. that was not the kind of life i wanted. not being seen. being a hated minority. being a joke. being on the waiting line until i could actually be myself, live. nothing about that made me feel good, and to top it all off, i was desperately lonely and without any orientation in life (thanks, parents). there was no way for me to win. not back then.

what i experienced when puberty started was detachment from my body. like, oh, thats breasts i guess? kay, ill buy a bra then, i guess. it wasn’t for me, but i didn’t feel anything negative about it. i just didn’t feel anything. a body is just a body. on its own, it doesn’t really mean a lot.

i started hating my body because i started hating myself. nobody loved me, as me. i couldn’t be “me”. i couldn’t become “me”. i couldn’t present the way people wanted me to and i was too socially anxious to even speak up for myself and about who i was. i was like a newborn babe. i was completely vulnerable, and society was only going to hurt me. society doesn’t want us to exist, still doesn’t.

the only way i could cope with my loneliness, with my failure, because i wasn’t ever taught how to love and stand up for myself, was to hate everything about myself. every breath. everything about me was wrong. i was self harming, because that at least felt real and honest. i hated my body because nobody accepted me being trans, being me. being, simply, not a girl. i wasn’t what everybody was seeing in me and what wasn’t there. i hated my body because nobody saw me in it. i was completely alone and isolated.

i went to a trans man meeting, once. it didn’t help me. i couldn’t identify with the people there. they were men. manly confidence was what they were displaying. i didn’t have that. so, once again, i felt alienated. like i didn’t belong. like everybody was someone and i was noone.

it didn’t help me, seeing transition videos. i was too young to even be allowed to transition, and my parents certainly didn’t encourage me. it would’ve helped me to know that i was real. to know that i wasn’t alone. to know that i could, that i was allowed, to love myself. i wish that back then, i could’ve read things like “you don’t need dyshoria to be trans”, “love your trans body”, “nonbinary trans guys are real”. THAT would’ve helped me. that might’ve even saved me from years of hating myself, years of misery that i’m still trying to heal from.

and then they say “you need dysphoria to be trans”. you need to feel like shit, when they call you “she”, you need to feel like shit about your body. you need to feel like shit to be validated, and passing and transition need to be your only focus. appealing to cis people needs to be your only focus. appealing to the people who didn’t even care when i tried to “pass”.

it must be so simple. to look at your body, think “nah i hate that” and then focus on transitioning. to maybe, possibly, even have friends and parents who support you. who don’t make fun of you, who take you seriously. it must be so simple, that you assume everybody must have the same experience.

being trans isn’t a mental illness. being trans isn’t defined by how shitty you feel about your body and being misgendered. being trans isn’t black and white. gender isn’t black and white. by believing in that ideology, you make it harder for young people everywhere to have fun, to experiment, to figure themselves out. we already live in an incredibly stupid, sexist, binary society that tells us men and women are opposites and that’s all there is to humans. and oh yea, the gays exist too. and oh yea, some people are trans, but they look like they’re cis how crazy is that!! this is the mindset that you are defending. that you are feeding into. shame on you.

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sweetveins · 5 years

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so fellas, felladies and nonfellanaries of the tumblrverse i really got into it in the comments section of ContraPoint’s lovely video simply entitled “Transtrenders” if you don’t know about Natalie you may be alarmed but i highly recommend giving the video a watch because as a big black genderfuck it was a much appreciated measured response to the toxic bullshit we’ve all seen oozing out of the truscum community. i wanted to just post my response to a comment that really struck me as unsettling and really just rattle on about gender shit so suck my theydick General TW for transphobia and nbphobia for the following

to summarize the general thread leading up to me popping off, it began as someone saying that they were glad the portrayal of a nonbinary individual in the video wasn’t a portrayal that was “vapid” and “stupid” the thread strays however when the discussion begins about the nb people who are perceived as vapid and stupid have allegedly made themselves the stereotypical voice of nb community. responses expectedly were along the lines of the unfairness to generalize an entire community based off of some perhaps more unsavory nonbinary content and thus, the great adversary arrives Youtube User: Tom Sawyer’s Left Nut

“yes. It does go for any group ever. That's the whole thing about stereotyping. If people see only the videos online of stupid transtrender nb people, they'll begin to think that most, if not all, act like that. It's all they know about them so why would they think any differently? "It's unfair" but happens to everyone ever. No one can stop people from holding opinions on others, even if those opinions are blatantly false or hurtful. What they base their opinions on is just what they can see, if they don't see any decent nb people then no one can really do anything about that.” thus begins, my response:

but i doubt that you'd stand for this kind of "thats just how it is" mindset with say a racial group or economic class would you Left Nut. the whole point of movements meant to uplift minority groups is to break these same stereotypes. back in the day when the dominant white media caricature of the black man or black woman was stupid ugly watermelon obsessed monkeys im sure there were plenty of people in the black community who recognized this was unfair but had the same response to shrug their shoulders and say "that's how it is." despite the fact that this should be *further* motivation to *change* such a narrative. now we have a future where conditions for black people are significantly improved (though could certainly be better) BECAUSE of those who were outspoken and challenged this unfairness and were brave enough to band together and say "this is an unfair representation of who i am and i wont stand for it" i understand what you're probably thinking "but comment bitch, black people didn't make that caricature of themselves, the white people did. the stupid nb gender fucks have made themselves the prominent voice." id argue that in a lot of ways they they haven't.

suppose that you're an nb youtuber who has already done the long period of self reflection and questioning to come to the conclusions you've reached about your gender at this moment and you want to provide other questioning and nb people with the support they may not have. like justine touched on you've accepted that gender identity isn't the most logical thing in the world. though it leaves you intellectually vulnerable you set up your lil webcam, play that royalty-free ukelele intro and don't go very far into the proving you're valid thing, because for you the logical gymnastics of validity have already proven futile. your message is going to appear vapid and stupid to someone whos is waiting for you to 'prove' that you're real and valid via logic and reason, especially when they wrongfully appoint you as the figurehead of the entire nb community because you're their first source. and the more you respond and the more upset you become that your message has been flipped on its head, the more hysterical and triggered of an sjw you appear to be. unless you are constantly equipped with facts like historical nonbinary identities and studies surrounding nb, you're going to come off as vapid and stupid. but the same could also be said about a black person confronted with a white nationalist convinced the u.s should be an ethnostate. would you require every black person to come equipped with studies regarding the myth of black on black crime, studies that prove black people are more commonly arrested for doing the same crime as white people? is that the only way a black person's response can avoid being vapid and stupid sounding when they just leave it at "no you're wrong" ? im not saying that nb people shouldnt be informed. what i am saying is that reacting to a few bad argument as a representation of a whole issue doesn't mean there isn't a good argument out there given proper research. research that cis people and binary trans people can do on their own time instead of harassing every nb for answers. especially when even the well equipped genderfuck with practiced talking points may note ever be enough for cis people going into a conversation with intent to simply harass and attack helicopter them

nbphobia actually reminds a lot of biphobia when gays and lesbians were (some still are unfortunately) willing to harass bi people with "you're either one or the other" "just admit you're really just straight" sentiments bi people said "but actually im not. im bi and thats just how i am" sexuality is as much of an abstract weird mess as gender but we've come to a point of acceptance that we don't scoff when someone says they're bi or call them gay traitors or that they speak over the "real gays" they're part of the community like any other non-heterosexual identity

i warned you, i really went off. but the length of my response ought to speak to the kind of long winded intellectual gymnastics expected of queer people to logically explain the often irrational, complex nature of things like attraction sexuality and identity. and it breaks my heart that in this community there are people willing to perpetuate that mindset with anything they don’t fully understand- looking at you if it wasn’t obvious TERFs and truscum and nbphobes.

thank you for coming to my ted talk uwu

#xaid rambles #long post #lgbt #lgbtq #transphobia #nbphobia #trans #trans community #nonbinary #nonbinary community #gender nonconforming #terfs #truscum #inclusive #lgbt issues #trans issues

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wired-migraine · 7 years

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oc ramble

this not that much oc detail as it does personal detail but i mean fuck it same thing

___humanz

my oc wil looks a lot like a youtuber i watch and i only just realized that no matter how many changes i implement they’re always going to be that “you copied this character” character. fuck it. they dont have that lil M hair split (you know the one) and also made less fucking white like geez what the fuck was up. still working on face because of first sentence but cant bring myself to do anything drastic. the “main” self insert

pox on the other hand has to deal with “first created to be a self insert to someone elses comic and thats why there so out of place compared to the rest and you’re just making excuses to keep them in your own story” character. made them the drunk to think i could forget and feel good if i THOUGHT ABOUT IT REAL HARd like i’d then be drunk im pretty sure every pre teen has done this. keep in mind im actually afraid of what drugs might do to me personally cause i have 0 self control and tend to think way too negatively ie think id actually gone done did it before the brain could tell me to fucking not. pink boy.

bailey is one of those excuses to explain why pox is there. kinda dealing with her own life in my sort of idealized view. knew a lot of shit but couldnt find words to make her smart so she just kinda looks the part i guess. i love her face tho. from her you notice i start to color code these characters like some Stuart little movie. kaffee kathy

sarah never really got fleshed out. bailey took over. to be fair sarah was kinda boring cause i was still in the mindset that i couldnt make a main character gay but because i am the main character and also became gay it just worked itself around out of that rabbit hole. she would be a antagonist really and be my selective self and try to convince myself my friends would stay even if i was a bit distant but lmao didnt work!! also didn’t prove myself i was straight either. two stones. pigeion gal

forget the last dudes name. think i based em around what i learned about amputees from the ww1 unit. boring. they were originally going to be the love interest for pox but looked bad in my style at the time and so i never drew them again. dont think i gave them any interest other than “I AM EDGE” vibe. also associated with a wolf?? bad boy

__weird ones

chugs was based on a dream that i had where wil (me) was just sorta on a train that had spheres of houses and i had to figure out ghost stories. it was really vivid and i wanted to make those characters so i did. holds a lot of memories and really what i focused on because going through a real life is super boring. took a lot of my high school kms idealization off me for thinking it would be end of the world if i did it. kinda bad when i say it like that, but it also got me thinking i had more friends than what i did. originally was male, but now nonbinary that associates male cause it makes it easier for others to understand her. judge came later as i finally got insp from fucking bayoding balls of all things to associate her to tranquility. shes kinda between all things, living/dead, positive/negative and never really decides for themselves cause its not decided by the balance of fate. a great hugger and powerful enemy

kind has always been a fuckin slender clone cause in high school the thought of a evil watching over me was scary and the thought of captial g God watching was never really my thing esp after what i expected vs what i got but i guess that fits them best cause they are that shitty in between cream of corn. in turn they sorta started my mindset bout the revenant thing. after i got a hang of the presenting gender thing i put a lot of thought into what “souls” would look like. how you feel over how you look cause i didnt want strictly humanoid characters but just enough to associate back to the living. if you notice i always draw him as a sharp swiss cheese person in a fluffy puffy shirt and i think that defines them well. candle supplier

milli is ironically one of my most original characters despite being 99% tube and hair lines but still based on the horrible experiences i have every valentines with three dif guys i couldnt decide feelings with so for that alone it doesnt get a free pass. also based on fear of what happens in those relationships whether physical or mental and god i just put every possible bad thought onto it. fuck it. also based off milipedes which creep me the fuck out and want me to remove my feet. classic white face in darkness jump scare.

memo is literally just old person who gives you the world changing quest. basically useless but also deals with a lot of my thoughts of how to deal with death and being forgotten but not really?

pawn created only because i made a cute design thinking of ren fairs in town. also got into making characters look goopy so thats what they became. and dreams where i would get lost and die at carnivals because i couldn't find my parents. little too literal. also had a “mom” that was literally a giant pawn. like in chess. original. would send them out to fight.

peobe was just created to be the counter part. really no other story than pawns gotta fight fuckin something. tried for a kajui twist story but never bothered to get into who could see what in the living world.

shame is epitome of lazy and focused design. so many fucking hours deciding where the mirror pieces will be placed over a loose shadow body. had a cat counterpart called empathy, also boring. now im sorta mulling over whether they should have a counterpart or not cause their creation was created on accident.

blight created by memo to try to figure out why any fuckin one of them is here. sorta side chaotic neutral character that might go over to evil. only speaks in rhymes but not metaphores cause thats boring and way too much writing for me to pay attention to. inspired by my intense desire to eat the test tubes whenever i thought that i was never gonna make it in science as a career cause really, i was fucking sad. still think about eating glass tho but at least its not readily available so w/e. still think im an idiot most of the time and i think of this character. judge would not like them, pity most likely. literally test tube baby i mean look at them.

thats all i can think of for now in this particular universe k bye

#huh #oc #i did this to waste my time and also self critique my characters #mostly just roasting myself tho l m a o

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