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v-era-18 · 9 months

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HoneyBee

Chapter Five: Respect

‘Respect is important-but the higher power knows nothing about that’-Mikaela Banes

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Mad wouldn’t be the proper words to describe the sheer emotions she was feeling at the moment. This was the second time she was placed in handcuffs thanks to the boy who sat on the other side of Mikaela in the backseat. Her arms ached in the position she sat in, knees placed together in cramped fashion due to the driver's seat being rolled back a bit. Livid-yes that was the word (Y/n) wanted to use.

“Comfortable?” Simmons joked, he was met with an icy glare before the eyes traveled back to the window beside them, “I see you’re the smart one out of the three of them. You haven't said a word since we took you guys away.”

“I'll speak when we have a lawyer,” She bit out, her voice dripping in venom from the night filled events, “None of us are going to be talking to you.”

“Ah,” He grabbed his phone, pulling up a file with her face attached, “(Y/n) (L/n), only child-daughter of (D/n) and (M/n). Both parents tragically murdered in hit and run with the child being the only survivor, custody given to (GD/n) and (GM/n). (GD/n) died from cancer-”

Simmons was cut off from being struck in the head with the teens right foot, the heel of her worn out sneaker connecting with his jaw. Mikeala had moved against Sam to give the girl a passage of revenge to her utmost pleasure. The agent was shocked, locking in on heated brown eyes nailing him to the seat.

“Keep my family's name-out your fucking mouth!”

He laughed nervously, “I simply read your file-”

“Read it again, and I'll park my foot in your ass!”

“Okay-okay,” Simmons coughed and rubbed his aching jaw from the assault inflicted, “Did your alien friends teach you how to fight?”

“What?” Sam uttered.

“You heard me,”

“We have no idea what you're talking about,” Mikaela lied smoothly.

“Oh-oh, okay,” The man chuckled to himself, “Ladiesman217. That is your eBay username, right?”

“Yeah, but, you know-it was a typo and I ran with it.” Sam's excuse was total bullshit. He needed to just tell the truth for now on.

“What do you make of this?” The car went silent as Simmons played the tape, ultimately damning them with evidence.

“My name is Sam Witwicky, okay? I am here with my best friend (Y/n) (L/n) and my car-“

“Is that you?” He cocked a brow.

“Yeah that sounds like LadiesMan.” Mikaela stated simply. Sam rolled his eyes to hide his embarrassment.

“Last night at the station, you told the officer your car transformed. And that girl over there,” The man pointed to (Y/n), “Said she had evidence that they’ve been here for years.”

He looked between the three of them, “Enlighten me.”

“Well, here’s what I said, okay?” Sam laughed nervously, “‘Cause this is a total misunderstanding that my car had been stolen-“

“Really?”

“From me, from my home, but it’s fine now because it’s back! It came back!”

Mikaela noticed his error and decided to help, “Well, not by itself-“

“Well-no”

“Because cars don’t do that, because that would be crazy.” She started to laugh.

All of them joined in except (Y/n), the said girl looked at them completely done with the situation.

“That’s funny, that’s funny” Simmons went back serious, “So again, what do you kids know about aliens, huh?”

“Oh you mean, like a Martian? Like what, E.T? No.” Sam denied.

“It’s an urban legend.” Mikaela backed up.

“Yeah.”

“You see this,” he held up his badge, “this is an ‘I can do whatever I want and get away with it badge’”

Oh we know, you guys use it enough already.

“Right,” Sam's face went stoic, ultimately fed up putting up a front.

“I’m gonna lock you up forever.”

(Y/n) closed in on herself in the seat, Sam was ready to choke the man, he knew that he was directly targeting her with that statement. He felt ashamed with how he

“Oh, god. You know what? Don’t listen to him.” Mikaela snapped, “He’s just pissy cause he’s got to get back to guarding the mall.”

“You, in the training bra, do not test me.” The man quipped, “especially with your daddy’s parole coming up.”

“What?” Sam uttered, “Parole?”

“Sam,” (Y/n) tried, her voice was dry.

“It’s nothing,” Banes lied.

“Oh, grand theft auto, that ain’t nothin?”

The girl sighed looking towards the two best friends, “You know those cars my dad used to teach me to fix? Well-they-they weren’t always his.”

“You stole cars?”

“I know they had good reason,” (Y/n) defended the girl.

“Well, we couldn’t always afford a babysitter, so sometimes he had to take me along.”

“She’s got her own Juvie record to prove it!” The man exclaimed, “she’s a criminal! Criminals are hot.”

(Y/n) rolled her eyes in frustration, “ do you ever shut up?”

He ignored her, “That’d be a real shame if he had to rot in jail for the rest of his natural life. It’s is time to talk!”

Suddenly the car was hit, causing them to spin to a skidding stop. The three teens screamed in response, (Y/n) was more than prepared to see a decepticon emerge on the other side. Everyone in the car ducked upon large metal hands emerging through the windows and tearing off the car roof.

Upon looking up (Y/n) broke out into a grateful smile, it was no other than the leader of the Autobots himself who stopped the vehicle. Although he maybe could’ve done it a lot safer.

“You A-holes are in trouble now.” Sam smirked, “Gentleman, I want to introduce you to our friend, Optimus Prime.” His best friend smiled at his growing confidence, something about the two of them knowing the importance of their decisions was starting to have an effect. Sam was growing-slowly-but the signs were there. The prime slowly stood up in front of the car, inspecting the three teens in the backseat, his eyes staying on (Y/n) longer due to her dazed look.

“Taking the children was a bad move,” Optimus stated, “Autobots, relieve them of their weapons.”

The rest of the Autobots emerged, shocking the rest of the government men. (Y/n) felt her worries wash away for a minute, she looked over seeing Ironhide nod to her, pleased to see that she was safe. She smiled in response, glad to see she wasn't on the big man's bad side as she originally thought.

“Freeze,” Ironhide pointed his cannons, as a reflex the teens ducked their heads-although they weren't the ones in danger they knew the familiarity of the heat.

“Whoa! Whoa!”

“Gimme those!” Jazz took the weapons away. (Y/n)’s inner child screamed at the sight with questions on her tongue, ‘that had to have been a giant magnet or is it his hand naturally capable of doing that-’

Optimus kneeled down to the vehicle his faceplate could be read as furious.

“Hi there.” Simmons uttered with an awkward smile.

All nice now that you realize you fucked up.

“You don’t seem afraid. Are you not surprised to see us?” The Prime questioned.

The man shrugged nervously, “Look there are S-Seven protocols, okay? I’m not authorized to communicate with you except to tell you I can’t communicate with you.”

That wasn’t a good answer.

“Get out of the car.” The order sent chills down the human’s spines.

“All right. Me? You want me to get-“

“Now!”

The voice made the girl immediately try to get out of the car , it was that effective. She read that Primes could be terrifying, but she thought Optimus was an exception to that. She was extremely wrong.

Mikaela started to work on (Y/n)s handcuffs first, “Thank you” the girl whispered in thanks. Mikaela could feel the weight of gratitude the girl had expressed alone in her words as well as the hug afterwards.

She worked on Sam's next, “You’re good with handcuffs, too, now, huh?” This caused the girl to cringe at the boy's words, they weren't rough, just smart. The embarrassment set in of what her new friends knew about her and her past.

“You weren’t supposed to hear all that.”

“Yeah,” was all the boy could give as a response at the moment. He really couldn't think about Mikealas feelings at the moment

Sam grabbed (Y/n)’s face, turning it side to side to make sure there were no injuries. After the way those men were handling her he was on edge, after all these years Sam hasn't lost his overprotective touch. “Thank god you’re okay.” He whispered, pulling her into a hug.

She hugged him back.

Mikaela came forward looking at the two friends in confidence, “I have a record because I wouldn’t turn my dad in. When do you have to sacrifice anything in your perfect little life?”

(Y/n) shook her head, “Mikaela, your past doesn't make us view you any different. Those guys are assholes that don't have any respect.”

“Yeah,” Mikaela laughed bitterly, “Respect is important-but the higher power knows nothing about that.”

“What is Sector Seven?” Sam stalked up to Simmons, “Answer me.” The boy was done from the past hour, the fact of the matter is-he was holding his anger back. All he could think about was his friend going limp and he couldn't do anything about it. He felt weak-useless! His friend couldn't breathe and he couldn't do anything about it.

“I’m the one who asks questions around here. Not you, young man!” Simmons scoffed. This only caused Sam to step forward, his face growing red, the only thing that stopped him was the brunette placing a firm hand on his chest.

Mikeala stepped in, her anger radiating, “ How’d you know about the aliens?”

“Where did you take my parents?” Sam demanded answers again.

“I am not at liberty to discuss it.” The agent avoided answering once more. During this time (Y/n) felt a bit faint, shaking her head to get rid of the fog she looked around till she saw the faint outlines of black and yellow. With wobbly legs she made over to get guardian, causing him to look down and cock his head at her state-his optics narrowing slightly. Something was wrong.

“No?” Sam dove into the man’s pockets.

“Hey! You touch me, that's a federal offense,” the agent snarked.

Sam held the badge up to Simmons face, boldness radiating off of him, “‘Do whatever you want and get away with it’, right?”

Simmons scoffed, “Yeah. Brave now all of a sudden, with his big alien friend standing over there.”

Sam ignored him, “Where is Sector Seven?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Bumblebee kneeled down, trying to get a better look at his charge as she wobbled back and forth with her balance. Offering a servo the girl took it, using it to lay against in order not to fall. Mikaela noticed the interaction and immediately walked away from Sam gaining his attention.

“(Y/n)?!” Mikaela took the girl's face in her hands before continuing to check her pulse, “Are you okay? Do you need to sit down-?”

“Shit!” Sam raced over towards her, “She usually takes her anxiety meds after an attack, she needs proper medical attention-“

“We already gave it if you were paying attention.” One of the agents spoke up. The way the teen boy turned so fast was dizzying. Anger practically radiated off of him.

Mikaela turned towards Ratchet, her expression desperate, “Have you checked about human anatomy? O-or possible medical conditions?!” The medic stepped forward and started scanning (Y/n)‘s body, judging from his sudden stiff stance it wasn’t good.

“She’s highly malnourished and experiencing high fatigue. The effects from this ‘anxiety attack’ has left the body weak and slow to respond,” The autobots turned to Ratchet in shock, it hasn't even been three hours yet and their Storyteller was already experiencing harsh effects of war.

Bumblebee froze before heatedly turning to the government men in front of them, ‘Are you *bleep* serious?!’. The radio within the bot was switching between channels fast for him to find a proper response for this situation, however he couldn't find any. His anger was spilling over by the minute.

Sam turned to Bumblebee, his face red, “No you heard it right!” The teen boy pointed to the two FBI agents that grabbed her earlier along with Simmons berating, “Those fucking idiots were the ones who caused it! The ones who are supposedly supposed to protect our people-our nation?!”

Simmons seemed to grow nervous, looking at (Y/n)’s state as she was practically being held up by Mikaela, “I-It was a mistake on my part-I skipped her medical file-,”

“Oh! So you run background checks on her family but don't bother to check her medical file on severe anxiety? And you call yourself an Agent-?” Sam cut off looking right behind Simmons, a quirk of a smile appearing as they all heard an abrupt pop.

A disgusted breath left the older male as he felt himself drenched with what appeared to be gasoline, “Hey-Hey! Get that thing to stop, huh?”

Optimus frowned at his scouts actions, “Bumblebee, stop lubricating the man.” He understood why he was upset-they all did. However there were more approaches to the situation at hand they could do. The scout simply shrugged, turning back to his charge faintly smiling at him the best she could.

Ratchet was kneeling before her giving instructions on what to do for her condition until they could get her to be properly treated. (Y/n) proceeded to do the breathing methods along with telling herself a story to distract herself from what was going on around her. Bumblebee stood on the side for support, watching her chest rise and fall at a good pace as well as making sure her balance was okay. It wasn't long before all the government men were seated that her breathing and body gained some strength back.

“All right, tough guy,” Mikaela waltzed over to Simmons, “Take it off.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Your clothes, all of it, off.” The brunette demanded once more.

Simmons was beyond pissed, “For what?!”

She took a deep breath before responding, gathering all the patience she needed from tonight, “For threatening my dad,” She then proceeded to point to (Y/n)-the girl walking back over to the scene, “And for disrespecting (Y/n).”

The man took a long look between the three teens, his eyes unforgiving. It wasn't long before he started to do as he was told, “Little lady, this is the beginning of the end of your life.” Mikaela simply nodded, already ready for the consequences that would unfold from this. “You're a criminal. Let's face facts. It's in her gene pool-”

“You got a lot of mouth from someone with hideous underwear like that,” (Y/n)s face scrunched up in distaste.

“Now get behind the pole.” Mikaela ordered next.

“This is such a felony what you're doing,” The other man said, his stance prideful.

‘This bitch.’

(Y/n) looked him dead in the eye, the brown iris screaming in anger, “You guys commit felonies everyday but get off scot free because of your privilege. Don't talk to us about felonies. You lost that right forty minutes ago.”

Simmons turned to her and Sam, “I will hunt you down, okay? He'll hunt you down.” Sam simply replied with a nod. His threats aren't working, “Without any remorse! No remorse.”

(Y/n) froze as she heard it, the distant sounds of helicopters flying overhead and cars revving in the distance, “Uhh-guy’s! It's time to go!”

Ironhide heard it as well, “Optimus! Incoming!”, he slammed his servo on the ground causing a rippled effect of electricity to slow them down.

The autobots started to transform, leaving the three teens to look at the vehicles in pursuit anxiously. (Y/n) held the necklace on her chest, her heart hammering as her body still felt weak. If she needed to make a run for it she wouldn't get that far, she knew that for a fact-but if they-.

“Roll out,” Optimus orders the autobots, the screeching of tires filling their ears as they make their escape leaving them with the Prime. The leader lowered his hand, making (Y/n)s nerves go on edge, “Up you get.” In her mind it wouldn't make more sense for him to transform and the three of them claymore in, it would save the big rig a lot of time and be more discreet around the humans.

Not gonna argue right now.

Each of them climbed onto the Primes hand, before he lifted them up to his shoulders making haste on foot. OPtimus begins to run around the bridge, the helicopter's lights landing on them as the three teens try to hang on tight to whatere piece of metal on his shoulders that they could find. It wasn't long before he headed through the street, cars honking and skidding to a stop in order to not be crushed underneath.

“Oh my god,” (Y/n) gasped, she tried closing her eyes but she could hear it all. From the cruising of gravel to the endless screeching of tires and helicopter blades.

Optimus finally was able to lose them, hiding underneath the bridge high enough from the helicopters and cars so they wouldn't detect them. There was on problem. Gravity.

“Easy you three,” The prime tried to comfort, he could hear their panicked breaths in his audio receptors, concentrating especially on (Y/n) considering her current condition. Optimus shifted slightly trying to get a better grip, accidently knocking the three-of-them hanging off a piece of his shoulder like a loose thread.

“Oh my god! Sam no!” (Y/n) was hanging onto Mikealas hips, tears streaming down her face as a helicopter passed too close underneath her.

“No! NO! No, Sam!” Mikeala tried to grab the boy's other arm making sure the girl holding her wouldn't fall, “Sam don’t drop us!”

“Oh God!”

“Sam, don’t! Sam, dont!” She tried to get a better grip, her fear pumping into her stomach as she thought about the girl at her hip, “ I’m slipping! I’m slipping!”

“Mikeala don't you dare! Please don't let go!”

It was too late Sam lost his grip, causing the rest of them to scream the ground coming fast, “Hold on!” Optimus tried to catch them with his feet but was unsuccessful with them, being unable to grip in time.

With some hope for a miracle (Y/n) screamed “Bumblebee!”

A flash a black and yellow reached her peripherals before she felt herself being jostled a little. Her and Sam both held on to one another as they felt Bumblebee hit the ground coming to a skidding stop.

It wasn't long before they heard the copters again and the revving of engines, (Y/n) looked up at Bumblebee, her thoughts racing wild as she feared for his safety. “Bee you have to go now!”

“Stop! Stop!” Sam’s pleas were going unheard as they continued to fly overhead. The first cannon was shot and locked on, pulling the scout in another direction, “Wait! NO!”

“Take the shot! Get him! Take the shot!”

“Stop! No! Don't hurt him!,” (Y/n) raced forward but was pulled back by Mikaela, her grip strong, “Let me go! Bumblebee!” The second one was released-his other arm, the the third-one of his legs. She could hear it-the painful whirrs he was letting out from the assault-the worst part is this. He wasn't fighting back. He wasn't a threat to them.

The final shot flipped him completely off his feet leaving the girl in shock, her resolve crumbling, “Bee, you have to fight back! You hear me! Fight back!” (Y/n)s screams were useless underneath how loud the blades were, each second that went by hearing her protector in pain caused her great turmoil.

The cars arrived, blocking the exits from the scene before them. Sam pulled the two girls behind him, making sure to have a firm grip on his best friend so she wouldn't run to the scout, “No! Stop!”

Guns. It was the guns that made everything humbling, so frightening. That's all she could see around her from each man in black-badges on full display. “Get down on the ground! Get down! Get down!” The three teens' hands went up, slowly getting down on their knees in defeat. It wasn't enough for them as they were shoved down to the pavement, groans of discomfort leaving their lips, (Y/n) didnt care-she was too focused on the black and yellow mech groaning in pain- not making any effort to escape.

“Look! Please! He's not fighting back!” The afro haired cried, “You're hurting him!”

Her screams were ignored once more, only to be covered up with another chilling command, “Freeze it! Freeze it! Freeze it!”

They were pulled up, giving them a full view of the white smoke being blasted at him, Sam's screams filling the air, “Stop hurting him!”. Bumblebee fell to the ground, pained groans and whirrs filling the air as the girl's heart ripped in two. For a brief moment she didn't see the mech on the ground she could see another scene, a small framed femme trying to crawl away, two bodies laying waste in her arms as the men surrounded her. The surroundings were different. Instead of a bridge it was street lights and open roads-stores.

They had done this before. They had done this the night of her parents' deaths. And it definitely won't happen again tonight!

(Y/n) kicked the officer from behind, quickly making her way over to the black and yellow mech before them. It was blind rage, she could feel it, from the way she grabbed the house aiming it to the other men, one going down after she proceeded to kick him repeatedly. An officer tried to grab her, only for her to grab his baton and whack him with it, a resounding crack following. The best thing is she wasn't alone fighting for this mech's life-Sam and joined in hosing down another group of men as well, before being taken down by two other men.

She got through, getting in the scouts face-his optics focused on her, “Bee get up! You got to get-” Her sentence was cut short as he was grabbed from behind her mouth covered, before being pushed to the ground to be handcuffed. She fought back her fight not leaving her much to the officers dismay.

It was a domino effect, once she was pushed to the ground, they heard it. The angry whirrs from the scout was unmatched as he started to pull the helicopters down with him. (Y/n) looked over eyes catching optics as it seemed like he was trying to get to her, one copter was successfully pulled down it crashing on pace. It didn't explode, which was a good thing but it only got worse for the bot as another copter hooked him again pulling back down with more force this time.

No…

The girl let out a sob in defeat, her efforts were in vain for her protector couldn't be saved with her own hands. Sam was stopped in front of Simmons-the agent had a satisfied smile on his face, “Happy to see me again?”

“I'd rather jump from that bridge,” (Y/n) scowled.

Simmions simply cocked his head at her, “Put them in the car with their little criminal friend.” The two were ushered into the car, (Y/n) in the middle with Sam and Mikaela on either side of her. The afro hairs slammed her head back in frustration at the agent's next words, “I want that thing frozen and ready for transport.”

(Y/n) sobbed, “They're gonna do Bee just like they did Estel,” She turned to Sam, her expressions telling it all, “They're gonna freeze him and experiment on him.”

The witwicky shook his head, “We're not letting that happen, I promise,” He looked her in the eyes-they didn't waver this time causing her heart to swell, “And this time-i'm not breaking it.”

The cars pulled away the helicopters following in tow giving the green light for the autobots to emerge from hiding. Jazz was the first one to transform, scoping the area, “Hang back let me check it out,” He climbed down to underneath the bridge where Optimus was hiding. “Optimus, are we just gonna stand here and do nothing?”

“There's no way to free Bumblebee without harming the humans,” Was the Primes reply.

“But it's not right. He-”

“Let them leave.” The leader finalized, his tone filled with sorrow. He looked down before picking up the glasses they sacrificed so much to obtain, only to realize the book was still with the girl.

Their storyteller in the hands of the humans with the book was risking, but they trust her with their lives. With the way she fought hard to protect Bumblebee in her weak state-they'd be fools not to.

~ ✯ ~

(Y/n) sat across the other man and women on the helicopter nervously. She had never flown from so high before and she didn't think today was going to be the day she got to experience it. The night had quickly turned into day signifying she needed a long day of sleep in the comfort of her room snuggled up into one of her bears. Mikaela and Sam sat on either side of her once more, not giving her the glory of seeing the view down below, she guessed she shouldn't be complaining so much. She didn't know if she had a fear of heights, and today she didn't want to find out.

“So,” Sam started the conversation.

The blonde woman nodded in understanding, “What do they get you for?”

“Uh,” He turned to (Y/n) an awkward smile on his face, “I bought a car. Turned out to be an alien robot, and uh she-”

“My family has been associated with them for god knows how long,” His best friend finished for him.

‘Wow’ the man mouthed.

“Who knew?” He smiled, (Y/n) as well finally finding a tad bit of humor in their situation.

It wasn't long before they reached their location, the dam came into view with tourists becoming more apparent. With getting out of the vehicle the group of teens got a good view of their location, it was beautiful, if that's what anyone wanted to hear.

“This is not my idea of a vacation?” (Y/n) muttered, “I would rather to go to disney world than here,”

Sam laughed, “Shes finally back,”

“Meh,” The girl shrugged, “Just trying to make the best out of a shitty situation.”

The three of them followed the men, soon being met with the sight of Simmons, erasing the easy expression on the girl's face. She could still hear her protector's groans of pain in her head, ikt was even worse with the image of him reaching out to her, pulling down a helicopter in the process.

“Hey kids,” He looked between the two best friends, “I think we got off to a bad start huh?”

“A bad start would be an understatement,” The afro haired huffed.

He shrugged, playing nice, “You guys must be hungry,” he placed a hand on Sam’s shoulder, the boy growing annoyed, “You want a latte? HoHo? Double venti macchiato-?”

“Where's my car?” Sam questioned, “No better yet wheres my friend-”

Another man stepped forward, “Son, I need you to listen to me very carefully. People can die here.” He turned to (Y/n), “We need to know everything you know. We need to know it now.”

“No-”

“Okay,”

“Sam!” (Y/n) hissed, “What are you-?”

“But, first I'll take my car, my parents. Maybe you should write that down,” The boy replied, “Oh, and her juvie record. That's got to be gone. Like, forever.”

He turned to his best friend, “Anything you want to add (Y/n)? Since you know you're the one with all the history that these guys need to know,” the boy turned back to the other man with a smile on his face, “This girl beside me was raised on this stuff, She’s a (L/n)-learn to remember.”

The man froze for a minute, turning back to the girl, “(L/n)? Daughter of (D/n) (L/n)?” (Y/n) nodded, biting her lower lip from the man's intense stare. The man pointed to her looking at Simmons, “Get that girl whatever she wants immediately, her uncle is practically a veteran here and her family are legends.”

“And you son, come with me. We'll talk about your car,”

#bumblebee x black reader #bumblebee x reader #bumblebee #transformers x reader #transformers bayverse #transformers #transformers optimus #honeybee #Youtube

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bellmo15-blog · 10 days

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Trying New Games and Franchises is Important

I want to ask you all a question. Do you remember what one of your earliest memories playing a video game was? Right now your probably thinking of either playing a video game console that a family member like a cousin or older relative had or the first video game console you ever owned or maybe even just seeing an arcade machine at some public place. Those examples tend to be pretty interchangeable I find.

For me though it’s definitely when I got my PlayStation 2, the very first video game console I ever owned, for Christmas back in 2000. And with that console not only did I also get Crash Bandicoot 3 and Spyro 3 since the PlayStation 2 was backwards compatible with PlayStation 1 games but also a demo disk containing previews of upcoming games at the time. And there were only really three games from that disk I remember that well. Jak and Daxter, Devil May Cry because of course I’d remember that and Klonoa 2 (which side note can I just say how fucking stupid it is that the original PlayStation 2 version of Klonoa 2 costs as much as it does second hand on Ebay when not only is it over 20 years old at this point but you can literally buy an enhanced version of both it and the first game for modern systems and around the same price of $70 AUD? I mean that’s not as bad as some second-hand games can sometimes go where they can reach into the 100’s for but still.) All of these demos on this disk, they were all different kinds of games of different styles and different tones and different genres, and I had no idea what any of them were going to be like until I played them. And I loved that! Not knowing what I was getting into, that sense of the unknown, was exciting to childhood me.

I still remember when I originally played that Klonoa 2 demo as a child. That dark and stormy first level with that music in the background contrasted with the almost marketable plushie like character designs only for the other playable level in this demo being this bright waterpark where your going down a water slide on a floating surfboard. I loved it and am still kicking myself over how it took me over 20 years to play the full version of this game and it wasn’t even the original release either.

And that wasn’t even the only Demo disk for the Playstation 2 I had. You see my parents actually got a subscription to a PlayStation Magazine for me during the 2000's and every issue they would come attached with a playable demo disk. And I had a lot of these which meant even if I wouldn’t get to play the full versions of these games until much later in my life for various reasons, (other games that were more interesting to me/was a child and didn’t have my own money/was literally at the mercy of my parents bank account) I still had the opportunity to play a short snipit of a lot of different kinds of games. Zone of the Enders, Prince of Persia The Sands of Time, the original God of War, fucking Dog’s Life! And Dog’s Life wasn’t a very good game to begin with! But guess what? Even though Dog’s Life is one of the games I admit I’m glad I never sought out the full version of it was still something I had never tried before then. Same with almost every other game on these disks I played. Some I would eventually get the full versions of and others I wouldn’t until I got much, much older. Or maybe not at all!

And then we have games where my parents just got me them as a surprise gift, ones that I had no idea existed until that point nor did I have any expectations prior to playing them like with Scaler or Super Paper Mario. And that’s what I loved about playing new games, trying something new! Trying something different! Experiencing something new and unique!

And that love for trying unknown, different, and unique experiences, that never left! It has remained as I grew into a teenager and then into an adult. Only difference is that now I have more access to the internet which… okay to be honest that’s been just as much of a curse as it has been a blessing because of how much toxicity, cancer and negativity I’ve sadly had to put up with over the years not to mention all the people who are so thin skinned they see everything as an attack on them because “THIS PERSION SAID SOMETHING I DON’T AGREE WITH! THIS PERSON POSTED SOMETHING I DON’T LIKE! THIS PERSON IS SAYING OR POSTING STUFF THAT ISN’T EVEN DIRECTED AT ME PERSONALLY! I’M UNDER ATTACK! PERSONAL ATTACK! I’M UNDER ATTACK!!!” but it has also opened up a lot more opportunities for new games for me.

“Oh, Nintendo is making a new third person shooter IP about human squid hybrids who use their own ink for their weapons? That could be interesting. What’s that? The people who made Sly Cooper and Infamous are making a new open world game based in feudal Japan about a samurai who’s forced to break his own code of honour to fight back agents the invading Mongols? That could be neat! Come again? The people who made Skullgirls are trying their hand at a RPG action platformer hybrid? Yeah, I’d be into trying that!”

And I am super happy for that because in my honest opinion, trying new kinds of games and new kinds of experiences is way, WAY better and way more important than just playing only one game or one kind of game for most of your life. Think about it, if I had played nothing but Classic Crash Bandicoot and Spyro then I might of never gotten into the Prince of Perisa games. If I had stuck to only playing Assassin’s Creed once I got into that series and it was the only thing I ever played then I doubt I would of given the Shantae series a try or fallen in love with it as much as I am now. If I had just stuck purely to the Tekken series for my fighting game fix then would I still of been willing to try the Soul Calibur series out? Seriously, imagen playing nothing but Call of Duty or Minecraft for over a decade and nothing else just because they are super popular franchises and in the formers case get yearly releases. How boring would it get to just play the same franchise for years on end where very little actually changes when there’s so many games getting released that you might find yourself enjoying if you gave them a chance?

And I think this is a really important mindset to have because more often than not I’ve seen more and more people saying stuff like “gaming isn’t good anymore” or “gaming isn’t fun anymore” or whatever other sayings people are going on about in terms of modern gaming being bad. Meanwhile, they say this while also playing only one or two kinds of games because it get’s them the most views on there YouTube channel and the most ad revenue and never having tried anything else to find the gold in the mound of shit. And obvious this isn’t me trying to defend the industry as it is now because there are A LOT of issues with it right now and a lot of trends that just make me want to commit nefarious deeds anytime they come up. From shit like live service, battle passes, microtransactions, re-releases of old games that somehow look worse than the original even though these releases are running on objectively better hard where. But in my experience in the past four years alone I have played more games that I have enjoyed the hell out of than I have games where I haven’t. Hades, No Straight Roads, Ghost of Tsushima, Animal Crossing New Horizons, Hi Fi Rush, and that’s just new types of experiences two or in the case of Animal Crossing one I haven’t gone through for a long time. If I included new games that belonged to franchises I was already into anyway like Ratchet and Clank, Super Mario and all that I’d be here for longer.

In fact, it feels like the only new releases people even get excited about anymore are just re-releases or remasters of older games they likely have already played anyway. And re-releases just on there own are one of those things where my opinion on it largely depends on the context. From the perspective of someone who might of never played that game before then yeah, it’s great that those games can find a new audience especially since many games I have played for the first time have been via a re-released version. Double so if those original copies cost way, WAY to much second hand to begin with. From the perspective of someone who’s asking for those re-release even though they already have those original versions and have the means to still play them nowadays if they want, really? Is this really all you want from gaming anymore? Just remasters and re-releases of games you already played and still own? Nothing new? Nothing different?

Seriously, for as much as I love the Nintendo Switch one thing I have never been a fan of is how in the first couple of years of its life 80% of its first party library just felt like ports of Wii U games I either already owned like Mario Kart 8 and Pokken Tournament or could of saved money and gotten on my Wii U since I was finally making my own money around 2017 when the Switch launched. Sure, it wasn’t ALL Wii U ports as one of my favourite 3D Mario games would come out on this thing it’s launch year but I have recently gotten to the point where I have actually been asking myself “What was the point of me even getting this thing at launch if you’re just going to make most of its library port a bunch of games on a system I have already owned since 2012?” It's purely a personal thing of course since it's still great more people can play this games and I usually do try to look at it from that perspective when I can. I mean if there’s one thing I will give the Switch ports of certain Wii U games is that in the case of stuff like Mario Kart 8 Deluxe and Hyrule Warriors Definitive Edition they are actually the better versions of those games to play thanks to the gameplay tweaks and more content. Even with that though I still find it really wired that some people will be so quick to praise and actually ask for more ports on the Switch but then turn around and make fun of the PlayStation 5 for its ports even though the number of ports on that thing really isn’t as high as some people will make out.

I fucking hate console war bull shit so much.

But let’s say for the sake of argument that you’re not as interested in trying something outside of your comfort zone. Which is a perfectly understandable thing to be thinking and despite thinking that trying new games is important, trying to force people to play certain games is about as tolerable as the elitists who think that you should be playing every single game ever on its hardest setting because they think you’re not a “rEaL gAmEr” if you play God of War 2018 or Ragnarock on “Give Me Story" Difficulty. However, even then, wouldn’t you agree that long running franchises that have been around for decades should still try new things anyway?

In fact, I actually have a lot of respect for games that aren’t afraid to dip their toes into new avenues or shake up their formula a little bit. That is actually why Breath of the Wild is ranked so highly for me as one of my top 3 favourite Zelda games. Up to that point the series had been using the Link to the Past/Ocarina of Time formula for so long that this felt like a massive breath of fresh air. I mean even excluding main series we got stuff like the Dynasty Warriors crossover Hyrule Warriors plus it's sequel Age of Calamity and the Crypt of the Necrodancer crossover Cadence of Hyrule which were two completely different experiences from the typical Zelda fair yet could still serve as a great way for people like myself who absolutely love the Zelda series to try something new. Hell, even Assassin’s Creed Origins is a game in another long running series I love that I have a lot of respect for because of how it was willing to shake things up gameplay wise considering how the franchise was more or less suffering from over saturation at that point. Granted, I think that particular issue wouldn’t of even existed if Ubisoft didn’t try to push for yearly releases and actually gave there dev teams time to finish developing their games back when they did do yearly releases but my point still stands. And the Super Smash Bros series alone has done a lot for my interest in certain games, not just from the fact that it’s a cross over series with multiple different kinds of franchises but also thanks to stuff like the trophies pre Ultimate because of how they actually had descriptions for the characters or items and for Brawl and Wii U in particular, playable demos of those characters games of origins. I don’t think I’d even have an interest in some of the games that I do if it wasn’t for Smash Bros.

And sure, obviously you aren’t going to enjoy every new thing you play. That would be stupid to assume you should like something just because it’s different. I’ve played so many games in the past 20+ years of me playing games and while they all obviously weren’t the best, some even being shit like The Sniper 2 which is genuinely the worst game I own in my collection, I’m still happy that I am able to try as many different kinds of games as I have. And I think more people should try new games or franchises because even if you don’t end up liking them at least you were willing to give them a try. Just please, if you do dislike certain games you try, don’t say shit like “Ugg, I don’t understand how anyone can like this kind of game” or “WHY does this game have so much hype around it” and actually at least be respectful towards the people who do like it for the love of Palutena!

#Gaming

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emailencryption · 1 year

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How to Protect Your Email Account Passwords from Hackers

Many people, nostalgic for their 90s-era email account passwords, are having (or already had) their emails hacked.

I don’t mean to date myself (a lonely pursuit anyway), but I can remember having passwords in the 90s that were quaint by modern standards—in addition to being woefully inadequate to protect against today’s cybersleuths.

Below is the greatest hit list of the most commonly hacked passwords going back to the dawn of the internet. And mind you, a lot of these passwords weren’t just used for those early eBay purchases, but for much more serious banking and brokerage accounts where money could be drained very quickly.

5. Last name + 3-digit birthday

4. First child name (+ their birthday if you were feeling extra clever)

3. “qwerty”

2. “123456”

1. “password”

Using 1-3 is kind of inexcusable. 4-5 are little more understandable. Many of us though did use slightly more clever passwords that were easy enough to remember while ostensibly being so personal that nobody (we hoped) could figure it out on their own. Yeah, we could and should have always used “7sdf8dxz0sjh-3”, but who was going to remember that?

Many of us are now a little nostalgic for those easy-to-remember-but-totally-hackable passwords, and you may have a few that slipped through your own password manager despite all the nagging messages.

There’s some law out there that probably states that if you could do something (or are already doing something), it’s safe to say that millions of other people are very much doing that same thing—we’ll call it Khan’s Law for our purposes. So, I think we can agree that there are many other people, nostalgic for their 90s-era email account passwords, who are having (or already had) their emails hacked.

If you’re in an industry where there are many parties involved with important transactions, it’s safe to say (via Khan’s Law) that there’s someone in the mix who is very likely to have used a nostalgia-based password to access their email account. This, of course, exposes you (if you are sending email to them) and your company to cybercriminals and their modern social engineering attacks including wire fraud and mistakenly paying invoices to the wrong person.

Here’s where RMail’s Email Eavesdropping™ alerts come in. They not only protect your organization from falling prey to social engineering attacks, but they also spot security breaches beyond your email borders, at the recipient. This is relevant to those scenarios where an email impostor cuts you out of the communication, copying your email to the recipient at the recipient with replies set to come back to the cybercriminal, resulting in your recipient miswiring funds meant for you but instead are sent to a cybercriminal. (Who likes to be cut out of the (email) conversation? Certainly not you if you are trying to wrap up a deal!).

Best of all, RMail’s Email Eavesdropping™ alerts work seamlessly within any existing email security or email system. Even if you have an inbound email security gateway, you can add RMail, as this protects you on the outbound—and even beyond your email borders, at the recipient and beyond.

Finally, here’s another way to safeguard your email passwords: Change your name to 7sdf8dxz0sjh-3 and just use your name as your password 😊. As always, feel free to contact us to discuss how RMail and its Email Eavesdropping™ alerts will give you peace-of-mind.

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nickgerlich · 2 years

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Come Again?

I grew up in Chicago’s south suburbs in the 60s and 70s. While those were not exactly perfect times, especially considering the race riots Chicago had in the late-60s, they were pretty bucolic by today’s standards. Of course, the past always seems simpler by comparison, but it really was. We all had plenty of time to do everything we needed and more.

And one of the things that we did back then was to host garage sales. There is perhaps nothing more suburban than to gather up all your unwanted junk and clothing, put it on tables and racks, and put signs at every intersection for two miles. People would come in droves in search of bargains.

Of course, the very term “garage sale” is regional. It is common in much of the Great Lakes states, as well as the entirety of the nation’s midsection from North Dakota to Texas. In the southeast, they are called yard sales. In eastern Wisconsin, they are called rummage sales, and Connecticut and parts of Massachusetts call it a tag sale.

But I won’t hold it against any of them. It’s a garage sale, because they were typically hosted in the garage, something that by the 70s had become a two-car proposition. Of course, these days we all have so much junk we may not have room to have it in there, so we throw it all out on the driveway and yard. That’s another commentary for another day, though.

Resale has long been a thing in the US, but usually because people were looking for inexpensive knick-knacks, or, as in my case, unrecognized treasure. You’d be surprised how many fine collectibles have surfaced at garage sales, put on sale for pennies on the dollar by people who do not have the wherewithal to check eBay first. Of course, we didn’t have that in the 60s and 70s, so buyers were definitely in the power position if they knew their antiques.

But during times of inflation, not to mention the strong possibility that we are experiencing both inflation and recession—paging Jimmy Carter—we now find people, even the affluent, trolling resale stores. And that’s not to mention all the people off-loading things to generate cash flow. It’s a thing now. High income people are looking to secondhand stores to fuel their desire for luxury goods.

Brick-and-mortar franchised chains like Plato’s Closet and Once Upon A Child have been around a while, frequent locations for teens and young adults, as well as young parents, pawning off unwanted clothing items. There are resale furniture and sporting goods stores as well, although with the “quality” of furniture sold these days, I have a hard time imagining anything lasting more than five years, much less 10.

But now a new generation of resale has popped up. Clothes Mentor and Revolve function much like Plato’s Closet, but target higher-end women to bring in their unwanted designer outfits, purses, and shoes. It functions as a consignment shop, compared to the ones mentioned earlier, but the result is the same.

And then there are people who sell anything and everything on eBay and other sites. My wife does consignment selling on eBay, and has sold everything from toys and collectibles to sweaters and dresses. There’s a buyer for anything, apparently.

It is a phenomenon known as Recommerce, and it is growing rapidly these days, rising 15% in 2021, and predicted to grow 80% in the next five years. Not bad, especially when you consider that it is hitting a demographic that was once proud to buy only new items.

Sustainability fans love it as well, because it means less going to landfills. If we can circulate still-usable items, we are being more responsible stewards of the tangible realm, not just financial. It is also a way to score hard-to-find items once their original owners tire of them, or gain/lose too much weight.

But then again, should we be surprised? There has been a resale market for autos for as long as cars have been sold. I haven’t bought a brand new vehicle since 1991; I‘m good with gently used. I just haven’t done it with clothes yet, if only because I don’t equate driving my 2019 Dodge van with wearing someone else’s clothes. I probably shouldn’t be so fussy, because I can always launder and re-launder any used clothes I could buy. Maybe it’s just that, as the eldest child, I never had to worry about hand-me-downs.

Let’s think about other things, though, like a bicycle or camera. You know, my two big passions. In my 38 years of cycling, I have purchased two used bicycles. You never know how the previous owner used those things, and subtle flaws like a hairline crack in a frame can make your purchase worthless, not to mention dangerous. As for cameras, I similarly have no clue how it was used. Did it ever get wet? Dropped? And how many clicks have you taken? The same goes for fancy lenses.

And yet there are bargains to be found, not to mention plenty of websites for quality used gear like these, as well as high-end clothing. If you know the previous owner, that’s one thing. But if you don’t, then it is truly caveat emptor. There better be some pretty big bargains for me to assume these risks, but I would be open nonetheless.

Marketers and retailers, though, would be wise to pay attention to this trend, because it could portend poor sales in months to come. Even states need to wise up, because any sales done in the front yard or garage, or via Facebook Marketplace, Craig’s List, and eBay, evade the sales tax collector.

Finally, if well-heeled shoppers are doing this, who is going to buy clothing at that fancy new Dillard’s in Amarillo? I haven’t been, but I hear it puts their previous location to shame.

Maybe I’ll just watch for some of those chinos I want to show up in the aftermarket. I can be cheap like that.

Dr “I Have Room In The Closet“ Gerlich

Audio Blog

#marketing #resale #recommerce #garage #sale #retail

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copias-thrall · 3 years

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How would Mary goore react to hurting someone he genuinely cares about? I absolutely Love your writing!💕

Hello, nonny! Thank you, I love this ask!

This was going to be alist, but it got away from me! 😅

Enjoy 😘

It wasn’t anything big.

Just a few of Mary’s favorite beers (the craft kind—not the shitty beer he drank on his shoestring budget), some of that chronic shit you’d scored and have been saving for a special occasion, and a VHS box set of horror movie classics.

***

Mary comes in and out of your life at will, and that was something you accepted—knowing he was As Is or not at all. And honestly—no, really—you liked that. You had your own shit going on, and being Mary’s expected caregiver was NOT something you wanted to add to that list.

(If someone else wanted to try to tame him and pick up after him, well…kudos to them. Less work for you.)

Mary showed up on your pivotal days and he rubbed your feet and always invited you out to trivia. You'd held him when he was coming down from a bad trip and listened to his grievances and gave him a place to stay when he was persona non grata at his own. And in a way, that made you always feel like #1 in Mary’s world…and that was good enough for you.

***

A few months ago, Mary had been lying on your couch, picking the label off his beer bottle.

“I’m gonna be away for a bit,” he’d said.

“Oh?” you’d responded as you’d mashed the controls on your gaming controller.

“Yeah. I mean, I’ll be around…but I got some shit going on.”

You’d paused your game.

“Bad shit?”

He’d waved you off.

“Neg. Just tryna get myself out there. Signed up for open mics and shit.”

He’d shifted, his long legs receding from around you and folding under him.

“So, like…I got my job at the bowling alley…but nights and weekends are kinda shot.”

You’d tried not to let the disappointment show on your face. You supported Mary’s dreams, and that meant not making an issue that he was finally trying to do something about them.

This wasn’t against you. It was for him.

When you’d taken too long to respond, his face had scrunched.

“But if you want—”

“It’s fine, Mare,” you’d said as you’d made yourself smile. “This is important to you, so it’s important to me.”

You’d unpaused your game.

“Just don’t expect me to not beat this game without you.”

He’d grabbed the controller out of your hands with a snarl, causing you to cry out when you died.

“Fuck the game.” His hand had fisted your shirt. “Give me a night to remember.”

You had. Twice.

***

Mary had texted you occasionally over the next few weeks—a few memes, a few drunken key-smashes, a dick pic, and 2 grainy videos of his performances for critique—but such contact was sporadic, and you’d never seen him in real-time.

He’d blown in one night, five weeks in, with a box of pizza just as you'd been heading out to meet your crew. When you’d told him you’d made plans, he’d looked so crestfallen that you’d caved and canceled on them.

While he’d been there, he’d given you a date in 3 weeks.

“That Saturday I have nowhere to be,” he’d said as he’d chewed. “I can spend the whole day with you.”

You’d been careful not to seem too eager.

“Oh yeah? Should I plan shit?”

He’d crammed the whole crust into his mouth and had given you a doughy grin.

“Why ’’ya think I told you?”

You didn’t know what you’d expected, but when he’d had to bounce 90min later, you were still surprised. (That was hardly enough time to digest!)

“Sorry,” he’d winced. “I gotta be on a bus in 45min.”

He’d left, and you’d been too embarrassed to join your friends who were only just going to the second bar.

Having fun with your man ;) ? one of your friends had texted.

What do you think? You’d texted back before changing into your pjs and turning on Netflix.

***

So maybe you were low-key excited about your day with Mary.

Perhaps you’d spent those 3 weeks figuring out the perfect date—something that said, “I missed you,” without saying “But in a clingy way.”

Beer and horror were two things the both of you were totally into, and you knew he’d be exhausted, so it seemed perfect. You’d bought the boxed set off of eBay and splurged for expedited shipping; you’d borrowed your brother’s old dual TV/VCR from his college days; and you’d forgone your weekly Chinese takeout for the craft beer funds. (And if things got steamy, well…even better.)

***

A few days before The Date, you’d run into Mary on the bus. You were coming home from a shift, and he was going to his.

He’d brightened and waved you over—as if you weren’t already on your way—and you’d plopped down beside him with a tired grin. You’d told him of the latest entitled asshole, and he’d showed you another clip of him on guitar.

Before your stop had come up, you’d tentatively placed your hand over his.

“We still on for Saturday?”

He’d blinked at you a few moments before grinning.

“Yeah.”

“Should I plan a whole day for us, then?”

His arm had crept around your shoulders before pulling you into him to kiss your temple.

“Yeah, why not.”

***

That morning, you wake up happy.

Mary will be over soon.

You roll over and grab your phone.

When should I expect you? :-*

It takes him an hour to respond. You aren’t surprised—Mary isn’t known for being a morning person—so when your phone dings, you grab it up excitedly.

An excitement that dies when you read his text. And reread. And re-reread.

not 2day

goin upste 2 show

You blink.

What show? Didn’t we confirm?

yeah. got me thinkin

why no show?

so i chked

i missed one

gotta do it

Rage blooms hot, then cold behind your eyes and down your cheeks.

But you said we had the whole day. I made plans.

save em

ths is impt 2 me

We’ve had this planned for weeks.

i thot u suprted me

on a bus cnt tlk

You send a few more irate texts, but he doesn’t respond, and you toss your phone across the room with a shout of frustration. You scrub the hot tears from your eyes before they can fall.

And…on paper, Mary isn’t wrong. Nothing you had planned won’t keep: movies, beer, takeout.

But…

It gives you a stark look at what you mean to Mary. He gave you this date and confirmed it. He knew you were making plans.

How long was he going to wait to tell you he wasn’t even in the city anymore?

You fight the urge to kick the VHS tapes across the floor, but you open the fridge and grab a beer. If Queen Elizabeth could have beer for breakfast, then it was good enough for you.

Once you’ve downed all eight, you move on to the jug of vodka you keep for cleaning.

When you empty only liquid from your stomach into the toilet, you grab your frozen fries out of the freezer. You roll a handful of the cold ones in your mouth as you wait for the others to crisp in the oven, and once you’ve consumed the cooked ones, you go right back to the vodka.

***

Opening your eyes the next morning is a mistake, so you take a few deep breaths and go back to sleep.

When you wake again, your heart is fluttering, your stomach turns, and it feels like there’s an ice pick behind one eye. Shuffling slowly, you make your way out to your kitchen where you take some painkillers, drink some pickle juice, and eat two slices of plain bread.

The sense that you did something awful stays with you, but you’re in no condition to find your phone and see what you’ve done. Instead, you go back to bed. It takes more deep breathing to settle yourself, but once you do fall asleep, you’re out for hours.

You don’t feel amazing when you swim to consciousness again, but you feel at least like a human being.

Your phone is dead when you find it under the sink, and waiting the 5 or so minutes for it to charge feels like waiting to face the executioner.

It’s both better and worse than you expected.

You breathe a sigh of relief to see that there are no vague social media posts, and you didn’t drunk dial any of your friends, but…

The texts to and from Mary are ugly.

Apparently, you’d managed not to send him angry texts until he’d sent you another clip of his performing. But then the floodgates had opened.

You’d started with telling him you didn’t give a shit about the show, how he was an inconsiderate ass, and then you'd devolved into incomprehensible, typo-ridden texts that accused him of using you, that you were only something to do when he didn’t have anything better to do, that he was an entitled man-child and if he didn’t apologize, you were done.

Mary’s texts in response range from him being angry at your disregard, to heated retorts you were blowing this out of proportion (and he didn’t appreciate your “ad hominem” attacks), to a cool detachment that this wasn’t working over text and he’d finish this in person.

You put your head in your hands but are too dehydrated to cry.

***

Mary doesn’t text you again during his self-imposed time frame.

You don’t text him either, but that’s more out of self-preservation than pride. There’s no point exacerbating the situation…and you’re pretty sure there’s no coming back from this, so why speed up the inevitable?

The horror tapes taunt you every time you walk by them, and you wonder if you can return them (you can’t). You give the TV back to your brother, and when he asks you how it went, you plaster a smile on your face and say, “Great!” with forced enthusiasm you hope comes across as genuine.

The primo weed goes over to your friend’s house, and the two of you wax poetic all night about existential claptrap as you devour two cheese pizzas and a bag of bbq chips. You talk about Mary without talking about Mary, and you get a heartfelt, “Sorry, dude.”

You beat the video game anyway, but it’s mostly because you needed something to occupy your mind and less out of spite (though that’s there as well).

***

Despite waiting on tenterhooks to hear anything from Mary, you truly don’t really expect to. You know you’d been atrocious, even if it had been prompted by his careless disregard, and you know Mary isn’t really the kind of guy that troubles himself with relationships that are hard.

Not that you’re in a relationship.

So when there’s a knock on your door a week later and Mary’s behind it, you’re genuinely surprised.

You gape through the peephole in shock.

“Fuck. If you’re there, just let me in, ok?”

Fumbling with the chain, you unlock the door and crack it open.

“Mary?”

“You gonna let me in?” he rasps.

You shrug and step away from the door, and he shuffles inside. He looks around like you’ve changed anything (you haven’t), before turning around to face you.

You close the door and stare back.

He folds his arms. “Breaking up with someone over text is tacky.”

What you think is, So you’ve come to do it in person, but what you say is, “Can’t break up if you’re not together.”

He winces and runs his fingers through his hair.

“Yeah…apparently I’ve ‘taken advantage' of you.”

This…isn’t what you’re expecting.

“I…what?”

“Can we sit down?”

You nod, and Mary sits rigidly on the edge of your couch. You curl up in the chair on the opposite side.

He rubs his palms down his greasy jeans before he speaks.

“I mean…you pissed me off, ok?”

You nod.

“But, like—you weren’t wrong, ok? I kinda knew that deep down, but I’m a dumbass, you know?”

You don’t nod.

“And I kinda bitched about the whole thing…but the resounding response was that I was the asshole.”

He angles his body toward you.

“I guess I’ve kinda been treating you like my best friend that I fuck sometimes.”

Your entire face flushes—you’d always thought you’d maybe ranked a little higher than that—and you duck your head so he can’t see the tears that you blink back.

There’s a swish of fabric, and you startle hard when Mary’s hand is at your chin. He jerks back with a Sorry.

“Shit—that’s not what I…” he blows out a breath and puts his hands behind his head before looking back up at you.

“But you aren’t, and…fuck this is harder than I thought.”

So this is it.

Waiting for him to do the deed is clearly going to be excruciating, so you take charge of this whole shit-show.

“I understand,” you say flatly.

“You do?”

“It’s ok, Mare-Mary. It’s my own fault for reading too much into it. I just…I saw what I wanted to see, I guess. I know you don’t need…” you look down into your lap, “…my shit in your life.

He makes a noise low in his throat, and then he’s squatting in front of you, his hot hands planting on your knees.

“But I want your shit in my life.”

You squint your eyes at him.

“But what I said…”

He grasps your hands in his.

“Pissed me off, yeah…cuz I wasn’t fucking thinking, ok? You’re like one of the only people who gives a crap about what’s important to me. And all I could see was you suddenly…not.”

Anger wells up in you again, and you yank away your hands.

“Weeks, Mary…weeks of you all over the tri-state area, and you thought I didn’t care because of one night?! A night you promised to me?”

He sits back on his heels. “I know…fuck. Ok? At the time, it just felt…like the show couldn’t be rescheduled. Our night could.”

Because you’re what he does when he’s bored.

You curl in on yourself.

“Shit.” He leans forward again. “Fuck, I’m sorry, ok? I’m fucking on my knees here.”

You blink at him.

What?

“Please, please don’t break—say we’re done.”

“What?”

“Look, we can go into my shitty fucking psychological profile on why I fuck around later…but right now I need you to know that I knew it was you before I fucking knew it was you.”

You uncurl.

“That…’what’ was me?”

He knees forward and presses your hands to his face.

“The one I wanna spend my free time with. The one whose opinion means the most. The one who was the first person I wanted to share all my good shit with. You’re the one I missed, and—after that awful fucking night—everything felt pointless because I knew I couldn’t come over and jam about it.”

“Mare—what are you saying?”

“I’m saying I’m a fucking dumbass. I’m saying I thought I was pissed at you, but I was pissed at myself for fucking it up.” He sighs. “I’m saying no fucking one was on my side and they all told me to get my shit together.”

He looks up at you with wide eyes, and for the first time, you can see how they’re outlined in red, his subtle crow’s feet more pronounced.

“So, you’re not done with me? I’m not…too much trouble?”

He shakes his head in disbelief. “What? Shit, no. I’m asking you to not be done with me. I’ll give you all the nights you want. Fucking text me, and my ass’ll be here posthaste.” He shifts up, and his thumb ghosts over your lips. “Anything to get you to give me that secret smile again.”

“Secret smile?” you ask while trying to perform the action.

Mary actually blushes.

“Uh…yeah. You get this…” he makes a motion across his face, “…when you’re giving it back to me.” His fingers shove back through his hair as he casts his eyes down. “You don’t give it to anyone else.” He rubs the back of his neck. “I’ve made a study of it.”

You’re a swirl of emotions. Mary’s apologized—has admitted he was wrong and has asked for…more—but you’re still hurt. And embarrassed.

But he’s looking up at you with wet, hopeful eyes.

“Do you…” you start carefully, “…do you know why I got so mad?”

That statement was clearly not what he was expecting, and he blinks at you a few times before nodding and looking down at the floor.

“I made a…uh, commitment…to you. And I treated it like it didn’t mean anything.”

He gives you a look like, Did I get it right? and that’s close enough—even if he’s missing some of the nuance.

You nod. “And I know I…wasn’t…the best.”

His face contorts, and your heart sinks.

“You…” he shakes his head. “You said some awful things…some hurtful shit—and it really got in my head.”

Mary gives you a complicated look.

“Shit that you’d been pissed about for a while.” He traces your knee. “Shit you could’ve said to me…but shit I should have noticed. Fuck.” He presses his forehead into your knees, and you can’t stop yourself from sinking your fingers into his hair.

He takes it as encouragement and presses into you before looking up again.

“I just kinda wanna put that whole night behind us. It feels like a fucking ouroboros of fault. And like maybe I created it. But let’s agree to like…not do that again.”

You look down at him, and his eyes search your face.

“Ok…but what does all this mean, Mare? I can’t…I need to be something to you, ok? More than just your friend.”

Mary nods emphatically, and he takes your hand and curls his into it.

“No more fuck-ups, and no one else…can we start there?”

He’s saying all the right words, but you’re still trepidatious—you know Mary, and he doesn’t like constraints.

“I…just…how can I believe you?”

He shakes his head like he can’t believe you even have to ask. He rises and awkwardly reaches out to touch your face before drawing his hand back.

“Cuz you’re important to me. I care about you, and I don’t want to lose you. Ever.”

And yeah. Ok.

#asks #mary goore #gender neutral #hurt/comfort #my writing #original post

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thenatashamaximoff · 3 years

Text

Step Back To Reality

Summary: A soul for the soul stone was how it always went, but you don’t accept that. Basically like WandaVision but with you and Natasha.

Pairing: Natasha x Reader

Words: 1659

Check out my masterlist! There’s not much on it now, but I’m hoping to grow it as the days go on.

You became more aware when you felt circles being traced on your stomach, a wide smile crossing your features as you kept your eyes closed. She clung to you tightly, your arm wrapped around her. She traced one more circle and you couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

“Good morning,” she whispered and you looked down at her. She planted a kiss onto your lips before pulling away from you, chuckling when you groaned in annoyance at the sudden coldness. “We have a lot of things to do today, Y/N.” You looked at the clock on your nightstand. 2:22.

“We don’t have to do anything today,” you told her, smiling as you propped yourself up on your elbow. “We can cuddle all day if we want to. The Avengers don’t need us anymore, remember?”

She grinned. “That doesn’t mean we’re going to get lazy.” She reached into the dresser and threw a shirt at you, laughing when it smacked you in the face and plopped down to the bed beneath you. “Besides, we told the neighbors we’d help set up their yard sale.”

You sighed as you moved to sit up, pulling the shirt over your head and covering the top half of your body. “It’s the 21st century,” you stated, “can’t they just be normal and use eBay or something?”

Natasha looked at you. “You do realize how old our neighbors are, right?” She shook her head, her smile bright and wide. “Come on. We’re already late.”

After getting dressed, you met Natasha in the yard of your neighbors, Juliet and Tom. The 80-something-year-olds never looked better, but their lack of technology knowledge had always annoyed you. Especially since it always cut into your personal time with Natasha, just like now.

“Hey, sweetie.” Juliet greeted you with a wide smile as she picked up a plate of cookies. You picked one off the plate and popped it into your mouth as you smiled at her in return. “I am so thankful the two of you agreed to help Tom and me. You don’t know how long it took me to convince him to get rid of some of the junk we had lying around the basement.”

“Hey, it’s no worries,” Natasha assured, cutting you off from saying something rude. “We’re just glad to get out of the house. It felt like we’ve been cooped up in there for days.”

Juliet made eye contact with you, making you pull your lips up into a smile. “Please, help us.” She gestured towards Tom, who was carrying out a box from the house. Natasha rushed over to help him as he seemed to be struggling with it. “Help us.”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “We are helping you,” you assured her, smiling. Her expression seemed to be painful as she held her smile tightly. You walked by her to join Natasha as she set the box onto a table. “Hey, how long do you think we have to stay here?”

“Oh, at least the first five purchases,” she said, laughing at your expression. She looked into the box, sorting the old-looking nicknacks into neat rows on the table. “Calm down, Y/N. We’ll stay for an hour and then we can go home.” She shrugged as you looked at your phone.

“One hour,” you said, taking note of the time. 2:22.

“Will you help me with these?” She laughed as you tucked your phone away. You snatched one out of the box and stared down the child statue.

“Pretty sure these are just begging for their untimely demise,” you said as you set it onto the table. When your hand left it, though, it tipped over and rolled off the table, smashing onto the sidewalk with a crash before you could catch it.

You and Natasha shared a surprised look as Juliet walked over. “Oh, dear,” she said. “It’s okay, sweeties. That one probably wasn’t going to get sold anyhow.” She kneeled down to pick it up, but you demanded to do it.

As Natasha continued sorting the rest of the figures, you and Juliet picked up the pieces of the shattered one.

It was sometime later, but the yard sale was finally set up and off to a start. Within minutes, the yard was full of customers. You glanced at the time, 2:22. Only ten more minutes and the hour would already be over with. Then you and Natasha could go back home.

“Who would’ve thought that this place would be packed,” Natasha said as she joined you in one of the lawn chairs, slurping on your lemonade after snatching the full cup off a table. “Looks like they’re making a lot of money off of their old items.”

You took your lemonade away from her with a laugh as you said, “Well, we should get some money for the hard work we did.” You placed your drink on the opposite table, preventing Natasha from snagging it again. “Our hour’s almost up.” You looked at her with a wide smile.

“Oh, is it?” She reached over to grab hold of your hand, rubbing her thumb across the top of it while your fingers intertwined with each other. “So we can get back home and cuddle the rest of the day away?”

“I don’t understand what’s so wrong with that,” you said innocently, shrugging.

She rolled her eyes and brought your hand to her lips. “We should converse with the neighbors more,” she said, her breath running over the top of your hand as her lips brushed against your skin. “They seem like good people.”

“I’m not a fan of good people,” you confessed as she kissed your hand. She lowered your hands, bringing them into her lap. “I’m not into badass assassins.”

“Retired, badass assassins,” she corrected and you chuckled.

“How could I forget?” You looked up in time to see a familiar face walking towards the yard sale, Natasha completely oblivious to him. “Hey, how about you get me a new lemonade?” You grabbed your glass off the table and handed it to her, showing that it was empty.

“I only took a sip,” she countered.

“But it was the last sip,” you argued, smiling widely at her. You laughed in victory when she rolled her eyes and took the cup out of your hand, making her way into the neighbor’s house to fetch you a refill.

You quickly got out of your chair when she disappeared through the door, cutting off the familiar face from stepping into the yard. “Y/N!” he greeted happily.

You grabbed onto his elbow as you marched past him, dragging him away from the yard sale and around the hedges, away from prying eyes. “What are you doing here, Clint?” you demanded.

“We’ve been looking everywhere for you,” he said, a smile still on his face. You glanced over your shoulder towards the house, making sure Natasha is still inside. You had to get rid of Clint quickly. “Never thought I’d find you here, to be honest. Didn’t think you were the out-of-town kind of person. I never even heard of this place.”

“It’s off the grid,” you said between clenched teeth. “Whatever you’re going to ask, the answer’s no. Now leave.” You looked over your shoulder once more.

“Oh, come on,” Clint said, crossing his arms over his chest. “Look, I know why you quit the Avengers. Nat’s death hit everybody hard, but it’s been almost a year.”

You looked back at him, eyes narrowing. “You don’t know anything, Clint,” you declared, “so I suggest you leave.”

He furrowed his eyebrows, wondering why you were threatening him. Maybe he pushed a button he shouldn’t have? Honestly, he was only here because Steve made it a mission to find you and bring you back to the compound before something bad happened. Nobody really knows how your powers work, so it was impossible to know what would happen. Especially after Natasha died.

He opened his mouth to say something but closed it when his eyes traveled behind you. Now he was extremely confused. “Nat?”

You looked behind you and saw Natasha walk out of the house with a lemonade in her hand, her eyes looking around for you.

He looked down at you. “What the hell is going on here, Y/N?” he demanded.

Panic coursed through you as you had no choice, placing your fingers against his temples. His eyes turned red for a moment before fading back to normal, sending you a wide smile.

“Hey, Y/N!” he greeted. “I was just about to head to the yard sale of the century.”

You smiled at him. “Yeah, Nat’s already there.” You gestured for him to take the lead, following him as he made his way to the yard sale. “Hey, Nat! Look who I bumped into.”

Natasha’s face lit up with a smile as she placed the lemonade down, walking over to Clint and wrapping her arms around him tightly. “Barton,” she greeted, smiling widely. “Hopefully you’re not here to ruin retirement.”

“Of course not,” Clint answered, placing his hands on his hips. “I decided to retire, too. What is a man with just a bow and arrow going to do in a team of supers?” He laughed. “No, I just moved into town!”

Natasha looked at you, who shrugged, before turning her attention back to Clint. “And your family? How are they taking that?”

“What family?” Clint blinked, staring at Natasha for a moment, before getting distracted by something on the table behind her.

Natasha let him past her so she could step next to you. “Is he okay?” she questioned, watching him.

“I’m sure he’s fine,” you said, waving him off. “Our hour’s up, see?” You flashed your phone at her, showing her the time. 2:22. “Now we can go home.”

Natasha’s concerned features wiped away into a smile. “You’re right,” she said. “Let’s go home.”

#natasha romanoff #natasha #romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #romanoff x reader #reader insert #marvel #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #black widow #black #widow #black widow x reader

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dirk-has-rabies · 3 years

Text

Rabies Pride

so as some of you may have known (or dont if not hi welcome) I created rabies pride as a movement for trans autistic individuals to embrace who they are back in 2017. only a handful (maybe 30 ppl) used it and then one day a kid named spencer (rabidloving) was memed on after one of his OBVIOUSLY SATIRE posts about wanting rabies and being rabiessexual went viral. this completely derailed my movement and destroyed all the foothold it had because people would rather make fun of a mentally ill child who finds comfort in something “strange” than take a step back and let people cope how they wish with satire posts about themselves. (sorry for the petty im still so mad about what happened with him) They ended up chasing him off the website to the point where he had to change his name and make his accounts private. disgusting on this websites side.

during this time ppl were making flags and memes and at first they were playful and nice and ppl could still use rabiosexual and rabies pride in a bit of a similar way as my original definition as they used it to basically mean that they were proud of being someone who was “feral” or highenergy. but even then most the memes were laughing AT the ppl using it and not WITH as most of us thought.

so here is the original definition and background of rabies pride that i created:

Rabies pride is for Autistic Trans ppl. Its for all the people that were treated like animals, treated like they were contagious or had a deadly disease by classmates/siblings/anyone just for being “too loud” “too hyper” “too close” “too much” due to having autism and being openly trans. for all the people that cant be taken seriously due to things they cant control and where born with. Rabies pride is a movement to accept yourself and find others just like you who agree that you shouldnt have to act like a “normal person” to be able to be yourself. We believe that you are perfect as you and however you grow or expand or learn or love is perfect for you and it doesnt matter how others feel about your identity or brain or self. THATS what Rabies Pride is about. so think twice next time you make a meme about it or make fun of someone using it.

The background of it was back in 2017 a couple of friends and i in college started trying to think of a way to help ourselves feel safer as ourselves and not be ashamed of who we couldnt help being. now most of us were furries and all of us were autistic and trans using cosplay/fursuiting/art/alt fashion as a way of escaping the reality of our brains not matching our bodies. so one night we were all joking around and trying to thing of a movement to make for ourselves since we couldnt make a club at the community college and we thought up feral/cooties/and rabies as the names. since most of us were furries we decided on rabies pride. and it was born.

some FAQ:

Can anyone use it?

legally yes, no one is gunna call u out or stop you but it was created for autistic trans people so i would LIKE if you were both.

Does ADHD count?

yes its also nuerodivergent.

Did you create the flag?

no we also didnt have one before it was stolen so we just use the rabiosexual one in hopes we can reclaim it back from the ppl who made fun of us.

Where did you get your rabies pride merch?

its all handmade except my jacket patches which i got from this lovely old man on ebay here.

If this is the original definition why havnt i heard of it?

Because memes spread faster than the truth everytime. ppl would rather make fun of us than help us 100% of the time.

What about the strangeons deepdive?

it truthfully wasnt that deep. they just looked up the meme history and didnt even talk to anyone involved. im literally mutuals with spencer and his sister and neither of them got messaged yet they made most the video about him and he saw no money from it. again.

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ponyguru · 2 years

Text

Beanie Mania review

I won’t get too wordy, but I enjoyed the Beanie Mania documentary! It was interesting and insightful, especially for someone like me who was a child during the beanie craze. They did focus more on, like, the adult women who sort of fueled the craze, which was cool! But as my sister pointed out, the documentary team didn’t really go ‘hard’ on anything; it was very surface level.

The interviewer let one of the adult women (maybe Mary Beth?) go off and say ‘oh, the 90s was a simpler time, we didn’t have any real crises before 9/11.’ I mean, the AIDS crisis comes to mind immediately? Weren’t we in Kosovo around that time, too? But, sure, for a young white housewife in a very-white suburb, okay, the 90s were a very relaxed and opulent time, ripe for collectors, because you didn’t really think about any other major social events I guess!! The editors could have even added in some shade there, maybe some brief headlines about things that happened in the 90s, but instead they chose to let that stand as if it were some kind of great truth, LOL. So for that reason, it started right off on that feeling of ‘oh, we’re not really taking any accountability here, are we?’

They also sort of brushed over the whole ‘Ty Warner refused to pay more than $12 an hour to the woman who came up with the whole concept of giving each Beanie Baby a unique poem’, that got a couple of minutes spent on it. The worst that we heard about Ty Warner was that he was litigious, he didn’t pay taxes (and served no jail time for that), and he was greedy. But then they spent the rest of the documentary talking about how clever and creative and amazing he was, so ... yeah.

I also heard there’s a Beanie Baby book that just came out that’s all about what a creep Ty Warner was, so I’m gonna check that out for more in-depth stuff, I think. If you’re looking for a fun bit of fluff about the history of Beanie Babies (and cute shots of Beanie Babies hiding their eyes in horror, ha ha), check it out on HBO Max! It’s definitely worth the hour and a half, even if it’s not like, full of social criticism. It’s interesting to look back and see how other people perceived a phenomenon that I lived through as a kid.

(It also got me looking on eBay for Beanie prices, OH NO)

#beanie baby #beanie babies #beanie mania #beanie mania documentary

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khaleesiofalicante · 3 years

Note

I really said fuck classes who needs notes anyway (i do I have 5 tests in the next two weeks)

before I post my live blog here, I feel like people really underestimate how bad rumors are and how much they fuck with your mental health. they don't lose sleep over them, they don't think twice. but these things are harmful as fuck. they leave wounds that take so long to recover from because you keep on thinking about these lies who to others are "just words"

I've been there. it's not fun. I wish I had the courage back then to stand up to those rumors which I have now. these things never leave you. others might move on but the healing process is a journey that is long and hard. I wish more people understood just what effect their words can have.

Yeah, he knew a thing or two about family members going overboard with glitter.

IT'S RAFAEL CENTRIC GHSYGUJDUYDFUIKFDUIDFIUDF

TAVVY

DCSUIHDCSUIDUYUDICUIVSDUIHFVSUILFBUHKIFSV

I feel like I keyboard smash A LOT

“You will never drink even if you are not riding the bike,” Dad had pointed out – all Consul Voice and threatening glares. “The legal age for drinking in New York is 21.”

“But it’s 15 in Idris!”

“Well unfortunately for you, we are in Exile,” dad had grinned.

DAD ALEC UHIKSFDUIHKSGUIKSDVUIHKDVUHIKSVD

Max had a habit of ‘borrowing’ things and selling them on eBay. In his brother’s defense, Bapak had so many clothes that he never noticed when things disappeared. But Rafael did since he had a habit of wearing his father’s clothes.

The warlock – not the shadowhunter.

He wouldn’t be caught dead in one of those sweaters.

Now that Rafael was 18, he was almost as tall as his father.

The shadowhunter – not the warlock.

I AM SCREAMING

I love how he's clarifying which one he's talking about

“Do you know I used to have a crush on Lily Chen?” Tavvy blushed. “But then I found out she made out with Helen once and it kinda got weird.”

Ah yes. I remember. Does Rafael know that Alec also walked in on them?

ARCHITECT TAVVY

SDHDVUHDFSV,YDSFVUYVSFFUSVFUVFS

SHADOWUNTERS ATTENDING MUNDANE COLLEGES

“Dude, college kids don’t give a shit,” Tavvy laughed. “You could walk into a lecture covered in runes, holding a seraph blade and they wouldn’t give you a second look.”

“Cause they are chill?”

“Yes. But mostly cause they are dead inside,” Tavvy chuckled.

Surprisingly that's exactly what my grade 6 prefect told me (DAMN WHY AM I ALWAYS REMEMBERING GRADE 6 IT'S BEEN YEARS. that was a horrible year *shudders*)

ANJALI IS A CENTURION

LMAO THIS IS WHAT RAFAEL MEANT WHEN HE SAID HE WOULDNT WANT TO GO TO THE SCHOLOMANCE FOR PERSONAL REASONS

I still ship them.

“The meeting is going to go perfe-What is SHE doing here?”

Well, that was a quick change-

Unlike Aunt Maia, Lily did not like to be called Aunt Lily. So, Rafael respected her wishes. Max of course continued to call her Aunt Lily and sometimes Abeula Lily since his brother had a pathological condition of pissing people off.

THAT'S SO MAX OMG JHSXUHSCUHISDHUHUKIDVS

great now I miss Raphael

I HAVE A CLASS IN 7 MINUTES STOP MAKING ME CRY

that is so thoughtful of him though...

tears.

“There are no photos of Raphael,” Lily sighed.

“Because he is a vampire?” Tavvy asked sympathetically.

“Because he is Raphael,” she grinned. “Vampires can most certainly take photos. You should follow me on Instagram. My handle is simp_for_carstairs.”

Of course, it is. No one is surprised.

Tavvy picked one up, took a large bite and it threw it back immediately. “Holy shit, that’s spicy!”

“White,” Lily and Anjali snorted at the same time.

white people and their bland foods smh

“She is not wrong,” Lily nodded seriously. “I’m a Jem Carstairs fan first and a vampire second.”

As she should be

UHDSUHDFSUHFDH ANJALI AND RAFAEL COMPETING ABOUT WHO'S LILY'S FAVORITE

He observed Anjali’s long dark hair spilled over her shoulders as her eyes stayed on Lily – sharp, protective and beautiful.

"Beautiful"

I AM NOT LETTING THIS GO

I'm THE DAMN CAPTAIN OF THIS SHIP

FUCKING RUMORS

I'm GONNA KILL SOMEONE

“Shadowhunters are awful gossips,” Anjali said. “Let’s not waste our time with this nonsense.”

There was something in her voice. Something he couldn’t put his finger on.

No, wait I want to know what was in her voice.

But no. It couldn’t be. They weren’t dating.

YET

Rafael was sure there was something more than friendship between them. But David was polite to a fault and Max was an oblivious little shit. So, obviously nothing had happened yet.

OH MY GOD THESE TWO

But this was different. He would tolerate rumours about himself. But he would not tolerate rumours about his family.

I and Rafael will beat up the people who spread these rumors together :D

“She once told me she likes sipping tea more than drinking blood.

I-

same.

NOT THAT I DRINK BLOOD-

RAFAEL LMAO NO

"I hate her she's so annoying"

continues to daydream about her and how tall she'd be without those boots, lies to tavvy about her dating someone

Why did he do that? What was the purpose? Did he not want other people to date just because he wasn’t dating anyone?

And he calls Max oblivious.

oh class started

shit

IDC IDC I'LL STILL BE READING

LEXI AND SELENA ARE AT THE ACADEMY

JACE HYPER FIXATING ON THINGS BECAUSE HE'S BORED IS SUCH A MOOD

“David and I added rosemary to this one,” Uncle Jace wiped his hands on his apron. “It has definitely improved the taste, hasn’t it?”

“Save me,” David mouthed from behind the man.

LMAO POOR DAVID

“Empty nest syndrome,” Rafael chuckled. “I’m glad neither Max nor I had to leave home. My fathers are much worse.”

He remembered his first sleepover at the institute. His parents had waited for “an excruciating hour” before crashing the institute and joining the sleepover themselves.

yup, that's them.

“David,” Rafael grinned. “Are you afraid of my father?”

“What? No! He is the just a regular person…who can throw me in the silent city any time he wants,” David rambled and then shook his head. “Where is Max?”

He tried to sound nonchalant. But Rafael noted the way the other boy’s eyes fluttered every time he said Max’s name.

Just the way a crooked smile appeared on his brother’s lips every time someone said David’s name.

Idiots

ok, there is so much to unpack here.

DAVID HAS A VALID REASON OK??

These two are such IDIOTS HUSDUHISCUIDSVCUIHVSDUHI

“Max said Bapak is biased, and that he needs an unbiased tutor. Uncle Ragnor volunteered,” Rafael chuckled. “God bless the poor man.”

“Max isn’t that bad,” David replied.

“Looks like you’re biased too, David,” Rafael winked and picked up a spare bow from the training room.

of course, he is.

G-FORCE KJHSDCUISDYUKDFSUYKDSVYUSFD

oh shit

WHO DID WHAT THIS TIME

what's the rumor and who do I need to kill

He didn’t know her well. But she knew a lot about him. Just as she knew a lot about the twins. She was one of those people who was oddly invested in his life just because Rafael happened to the Consul’s son.

what is her problem?

what the fuck

I need a minute

I need a minute to digest that

I'm so glad I closed my camera in class

what the actual fuck did she just say

tell me I'm hallucinating

times like these I wish I was Jared 19

no, because I'm actually speechless right now

Paige and Irene need therapy

OH SHE WENT THERE

“Paige, that’s enough!” the Dean snapped at her. “How dare you talk to him that way? You talk about warlock corruption but where all of you when Valentine exploited Jace and Clary? Where was this moral obligation when Valentine lied to his children and played with their feelings as if they were nothing but toys to be controlled and manipulated? I’m sick of shadowhunters victim blaming children instead of holding people like Valentine accountable.”

THANK YOU

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK SIMON

I feel like we all focus so much on the "incest" and hate on clace we forget that this part of the story was literally an abuser seeing that the victim was recovering and took the only thing which made him happy from him

I can't believe this

“Children have been suffering for a long time now, Paige,” Uncle Jace said now, his fists balled at his sides. “Where were you when Alec proposed the child protection bill? We didn’t see any of you supporting it.”

“We had other priorities,” the older woman replied. “People were dying! It was not the right time for a new law. We could have always signed that bill later. There was no rush!”

OTHER PRIORITIES MY ASS BITCH FUCK YOU

hey just realizing Rafael is the token straight

I'M SORRY IM TRYING TO DISTRACT ME

“The Cohort who made children kill themselves to prove a point?” Uncle Simon asked dryly. “That Cohort?”

I am so close to either crying or killing someone or both.

This was Max’s spot since it had the best Wi-Fi coverage.

yeah trust me I spend all the time in the guest room because it has the best wifi coverage or the study.

MAX IS SMOKING TOO

YOU FUCKING IDIOTS

oh wait

oh they might be alec's

yeah

For the next thirty minutes, Max paced around the room, threatening to portal all the shadowhunters to hell.

Then he went on about a plan to attack the cohort and portal them all to hell too.

He kept talking about portalling people to hell.

MAX YES LET'S DO IT!!!!

But here is the thing about people, they don’t get to you. You get to them.

They simply say something and leave. They probably don’t even mean the things they say or lose sleep over it. But it wasn’t the same for you. You obsess over it. You stay awake at night and let it consume your dreams.

YES! To others, it's just words. meaningless. to you, the effect can be so so deep. it's not easy to always brush them off.

NO MAGNUS

THAT'S IT

MAX AND I ARE PORTALLING PEOPLE TO HELL

WE'RE DOING IT

why do we hurt others?

my teacher: ill take a test on this chapter. all 20 units

me: softly crying because people are little shits and they hurt others.

“Fuck everyone else,” dad hissed. “They’ve hurt our family enough.”

EXACTLY. LEAVE THEM ALONE.

“I am simply being honest with you,” Dad interrupted. “I could never be okay when you are away from me. But I will manage. Max is going to raise hell though. So, that’s going to be fun.”

AS HE SHOULD

Neither Rafael nor Max would never admit it out loud, but on the day of that sleepover, on the day their parents had crashed the institute bcause they had missed the kids too much…Rafael and Max had been only a moment away from calling their parents to come pick them up.

He's right though.

it'll take time. lots of it maybe.

BUT THE ACTUAL AUDACITY.

It fucked with his mind so much.

Rafael...ALRIGHT WHERE ARE MY FLAMETHROWERS

“DAD! BAPA! WAKE UP! RAFE IS TRYING TO RUN AWAY!”

MAX REMINDS ME SO MUCH OF MY LITTLE BROTHER

He had forgotten about the bloody paperwork. Shadowhunters on their travel year had to notify the Clave and get their paperwork in order.

Well, it shouldn’t be a problem since the Clave was standing across the hall.

EXACTLY

Because it was killing him. It was killing him not to be lying on the couch, his head resting on his Bapak’s lap just like every other Saturday morning.

It was killing him not to touch, not to love, not to care.

GET MY FLAMETHROWERS AND CANNIBAL GOLDFISHES WE HAVE SOME WORK TO DO

(goddamn every class I have taken so far the teacher has told us there is a test coming up it's 9 am in the morning.)

His brother growled at that like the little feral animal that he was.

that's adorable actually.

“Fine,” Max rolled his eyes. “Does this mean I can also travel? There is a Twenty One Pilots concert in Sydney and-”

“Nice try,” Dad said. “But no. You are staying here.”

“Excuse me, but what about my healing?” Max demanded. “I’ve been traumatised by this thing.”

“You can go to therapy,” Rafael winked at this brother.

Therapy is boring but useful so-

He needed to survive this. So, he decided to go back to the place he had learned how to survive in the first place.

He needed to go back home.

UGLY CRYING WHILE TAYLOR SWIFT PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND AND MY HISTORY CLASS IN 2 MINUTES

I'm so proud of him for this...

I still say we kill these people.

JOAQUIN AND JULIETTE

UHISDCUIHFSDUGUIDFVDSDVFJHGDFVHUKDVHUKVF

Camilla Alvarez.

well well.

OH THEY KISSED

“Right,” Rafael had said. “Gap year. Besides, I do talk them. My brother threatened to paint my room in hot pink if I don’t text him every day.”

hands max a pint of paint HAVE AT IT

Max: Also – New Rumour. Dalliance between Lily and Tavvy.

Rafe: OMFG WHAT

Max: They are running with it and freaking old n*philim out.

AS THEY SHOULD UFUHIFUIHFUIHKFU

THE CENSORED N*PHILIM I'M SCREAMING

“He is hot.”

He laughed out loud. “Yeah. I hear that a lot.”

“Your dad looks kinda scary,” she pointed out.

Rafael laughed again. “Yeah. I kinda hear that a lot too.”

I'm liking this ship...

I'M STILL LOYAL TO THE RAFAEL AND ANJALI SHIP

but I'm happy for him. I'm glad he's getting the space he needs

Dad: Jst found legal age fr drnkng in Buenos Aires is 18.

Rafe: ????

Dad: I hv friends thr.

Rafe: ???

Dad: Thy r watchn u.

Rafe: Creepy but okay.

HJSDCGUIHJGSDCYUICVXUHVUHKDV

THE BOY'S DRINKING Y'ALL

Do it

MILA IS GOING TO NY!!

I like her. she's nice.

He was leaving soon. He didn’t see the point in lying to her. “I ran away from home. Kind of.”

“Why?”

“I hurt someone I love,” Rafael confessed. “The person I love most in the world.”

honey, it wasn't your fault... hugs

Shit. Why wasn’t Bapak going to the accords signing? He had been there for every single one since the very first time.

no no no no is something wrong?? I'm worried.

“You look taller,” Rafael told his brother who hadn’t grown an inch.

LMAO

Max and I are vertically challenged.

“Rafe, go to talk to him. Or I will tell everyone you’ve been smoking in the balcony!”

So, he was going to pin this on him, huh? This little shit.

well-

“You’ve progressed from freaking to fucking,” he pointed out.

“That’s not the fucking point, Rafael!” Max said in exasperation.

“You did it again,” Rafe pinched Max’s cheek. “My little brother is all grown up now. Linguistically I mean.”

“Dick."

I CAN'T WITH THESE TWO

When he had gone back to Buenos Aires, the place was completely different - even the shadow market.

There were no abandoned children in the streets. There were no racist and ignorant leaders exploiting innocent downworlders.

There was only growth.

His father had done that. Alec Lightwood had helped Joaquin and his people create a new world in Buenos Aires.

This shows how much people can flourish under good leadership if they really try.

YOU KNOW I'M SUPPOSED TO BE TAKING THESE NOTES DOWN, NOT CRYING OVER THIS.

“I will protect our family. I will protect our friends. I will protect those who ask for my protection. But I will not tolerate their hate. I will not turn my head and pretend it doesn’t hurt. Because it does hurt and that’s not okay.”

Rafael smiled at that. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s not okay.”

“The accords is important. But so am I. There is no point in signing a treaty that is meant to value equality if I have to sign it while being surrounded by those who refuse to respect me or my identity. I simply cannot do it, Rafael. I hope you understand.”

I'm sobbing like YES YOU DONT OWE THEM SHIT. THESE UNGRATEFUL BITCHES.

“It’s taken me a while to realize this. But I don’t owe the nephilim anything,” Bapak said firmly. “It’s about time they realize that too.”

YES EXACTLY

“I’ve known shadowhunters for a long time, Rafael. Good ones. Bad ones. All kinds of them – and shadowhunters have always defined themselves by their love. Not by your weapons. Not by your runes. Not by your last names. Not by your laws. Shadowhunters have always defined themselves by love. So, don’t ever let them take that away from you.”

I want this on a T-shirt. These damn shadowhunters and their love.

“Like the Accords Hall kiss?” Rafael grinned.

“It’s the stupidest thing your father had ever done – which is really saying something,” his father laughed. “But it’s also the bravest thing I’ve ever seen him do. And that’s how I knew.”

affectionate sigh that's alec.

“Good. Max is sitting in the porch and singing All by Myself,” Tessa chuckled and closed the door. “Just thought you should know!!”

Rafael giggled at that. “He must have given you hell.”

“Nothing I couldn’t handle,” Bapak shrugged, and Rafael raised an eyebrow. “Fine. I might have promised to buy him a car when he turns 18.”

“You’re hoping he would stop aging by then, aren’t you?” Rafael chuckled.

Max is so dramatic I aspire to be like him.

Blue banners when the lost return, the shadowhunter rhythm said.

Rafael had returned home – and he was no longer lost.

I'm ok I say as I cry during my history class

I'm so proud of him.

“Well, that needs to be rectified immediately,” Dad said in the Consul Voice and literally yelled. “I am about to kiss my son – on both cheeks! You better gossip about this too!”

“Oh my god, stop!” Rafael giggled and tried to escape.

“YAS!” he heard Uncle Jace yelled from somewhere. “GIVE US A FOREHEAD KISS TOO!”

THEY ARE SO DRAMATIC I LOVE THESE IDIOTS SO MUCH.

THEM ADDING TO THE ACCORDS AS THEY SHOULD OMG

“The hell is hate speech?” someone asked.

Do you not have a dictionary you uncultured swine

“There is a very clear difference between free speech and hate speech,” Cristina Rosales pointed out. “The fact that you don’t seem to know that is all the more reason for us to include this provision.”

YES CRISTINA

“By the angel,” an old man gasped. “There is no need to be so emotional. The younger generation can be such snowflakes.”

What if I just strangles him

“Discriminatory language?” a woman demanded. “What does that even mean?”

“Calling vampires bloodsuckers,” Lily Chen answered.

“Calling warlocks demon spawns,” Ragnor Fell pointed out.

“Calling werewolves fleabags,” Maia Roberts declared.

“Calling faeries half-breeds,” Kieran Kingson all but yelled.

The fact that they have had to deal with this shit for YEARS. (also why Kingson? isn't Kieran the king?)

THE QUEEN HERSELF IS HERE Y'ALL

“Which one of you shitheads said hate speech is harmless?” Anjali demanded, her voice booming over everyone and everything else.

YES ANJALI

Anjali had a grin of her own. “While that might true, Paige, there is most certainly a law on child protection. You didn’t just hurt Magnus Bane. You also hurt his son. Section 7 of the Child Protection Bill states that any person who physically or emotionally injures a child through ill-treatment, neglect, abandonment or abuse is guilty of breaking the covenant.”

“Damn straight!” someone yelled from the crowd – it sounded suspiciously like Kit.

CALL THESE BITCHES OUT YES

“Rafael is not a child!” someone yelled again. A lot of them this time. “It’s still not illegal. The law doesn’t say so!”

“By the angel, for someone who is obsessed with the law you people seem to know nothing about it,” Anjali said in exasperation. “The child protection law defines a child as a person under 18 years OR younger. The incident happened when he was still 18. It’s illegal.”

YES ANJALI FUCK THESE PEOPLE

“I’m the Inquisitor’s daughter,” she said. “Next time, think twice before you quote the law at me.”

SHOW THEM, QUEEN

How did she know his birthday????

ahem

“So, if you do hurt him emotionally, you can still be implicated. You will face charges and you can possibly be stripped of your runes,” Anjali pointed out seriously. “Now I ask you again. Does anyone else have to say anything about him?”

There was absolute silence then.

“Didn’t fucking think so,” Anjali spat. “I literally had to mention the stripping of your marks for you to respect another person’s basic rights. If you give half the value you place on your precious runes to other people, we wouldn’t be in exile right now.”

The Cohort looked terrified – of Anjali or their future in the Clave, Rafael didn’t know.

“People are dying,” Anjali said, her voice heavy now. “Our people are fucking dying, and you seem to be more bothered with who is sleeping with whom. Shame on you. Shame on all of you!”

She turned to the Council. The Inquisitor looked like he was going to cry from pride. Rafael’s dad looked half terrified but mostly impressed. Lily was blowing kisses at Anjali. The other downworld leaders looked quite pleased.

Shadowhunters are so fucking bigoted and narrow-minded. I'm seething right now.

also, alec looking scared-

“THAT’S THE BEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!” Emma Carstairs yelled.

“Goddamn, I wish Magnus was here to see this,” Uncle Jace grinned. “That was satisfying as hell.”

“No worries, I recorded the whole thing!” Kit put up his hand.

YES YES AND YES

“Fuck the Cohort,” Rafael giggled.

“Actually, I would prefer you use the word screw,” his father pointed out. “Screw the Cohort!”

“Oh my god, Dad!” Rafael rolled his eyes. “I am allowed to swear once in a while.”

“No, you are not,” Dad said firmly – this man was so not ready to meet Max’s new persona. “As your friend pointed out, you are still a child.”

Alec seeing Max curse left and right: 👁️👄👁️

"She hates me!"

“Rafael, she stood up for you in front of the entire Clave. She fought the Cohort. It was incredibly brave. I wish she had spoken to me before without causing all the chaos. So, it was a little stupid of course. But still brave.”

Stupid but brave.

YESYESYESYES IT'S HAPPENING!!!

ANJALI WHO HURT YOU

WHO DARED TO

Names. Give me names NOW

Jaime no...please no not Jaime.

please please, please

ok, I searched it up. And he can get treatment. He can live. It doesn't have to be serious. please, Jaime...

“If you ever tell anyone you saw me crying, I will drag you to Idris and drown you in Lake Lyn.”

This is such an Anjali thing to say.

OOO MILLA (Mila?) MESSAGED!!! Is there gonna be some sort of love triangle here??

me who despises love triangles (aside from TID of course): ...

BUT SINCE IT'S YOU I'M SURE IT'LL BE AMAZING. I'm still nervous about this though...

UHCUHDVUKDVHUKVHUVHM I LOVED THIS CHAPTER SO SO SO SO MUCH IT WAS A LITERAL ROLLERCOASTER AND ANJALI QUEEN I LOVE

see ya on Friday!!

OKAY I AM LOVING THIS ENERGY BUT PLEASE FOCUS ON YOUR CLASSES FJKSDFHJKSJFHKD I PROMISE THE STORY IS GOING TO BE HERE WHEN YOU GET BACK LOL.

But I am so glad you like it. Amidst all your screaming and chaos, I always find very perceptive and profound observations. It's fantastic! I love it so much!

Thank you for enjoying LBAF - and good luck with your tests!!!

#lbaf

16 notes · View notes

feelingofcontent · 3 years

Text

DNP Rewatch: Dyeing My Hair Blue!

Date video was published: 09/30/2013 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 197

Phil filmed this before he went on his “mini European adventure” but didn’t post it until after he was back. I’ll talk about that trip in the post for the video he shot for it - EUROPEAN MEET-UP ADVENTURE!

0:04 - starting with a crotch-shot and a life hack. That does seem like something Phil needs though, haha.

0:20 - haircut and it looks so brown here!

0:26 - ahhhhh, that’s so weird. Why would someone sell hair on eBay? And who would buy it?! WTF. He tweeted a couple times (1, 2) about his hair stylist Fabrice prior to this.

0:34 - is this why DNP started having someone come to their house to cut their hair?

0:48 - “Susan” and “Danny”...Phil has a very limited repertoire of names. 😂

0:55 - Phil really will just dye his hair on a whim, huh?

1:06 - the t-shirt from PINOF3 is now an “old” t-shirt 😕

1:17 - this seems like a dangerous game doing it on his bed

1:21 - “I love squeezing things into...other things” thanks for sharing, Phil 👀

1:36 - did he really need to make putting on gloves so creepy

1:45 - just singing to himself

1:55 - just doing it without a mirror too, presumably. I guess he has the viewfinder.

2:06 - he says “I’ll ask you guys some questions...” when he really means he’ll be the one answer, lol. It’s been a while since we had a Phil Q&A! Here’s his intense tweet from when he was filming.

2:21 - that looks so messy, yikes

2:24 - it comes back up in one of the friendship quiz gaming videos that he would have been called Fiona if he was a girl!

2:29 - that is horrifying; I’m sorry 😳

2:36 - Phil looking down as if he can see what’s happening the floor below, lol

2:54 - I love Phil dancing here and I can’t explain it. His face is just so unamused 😂

2:59 - child-Phil wanting to be a weatherman mention!

3:16 - what a weird question. And the fact that the second thing out of Phil’s mouth is “santa”...why.

3:28 - editing the dancing clip back in! So great.

3:34 - more editing repeats!

3:46 - I like the blue!

This was somehow a very chaotic Phil video for a Q&A. I was mostly just nervous for him for the potential of dripping hair dye on his bed the whole time, lol.

#dan and phil #dnp #dnpRewatch #amazingphil #phil lester #amazingphil videos #Dyeing My Hair Blue!

22 notes · View notes

orange-waterfalls · 4 years

Text

Just Dance for the Nintendo Wii

Yancy x gn!reader

ty anon for the request!

A/N: Shit was so fun to write I swear. Just Dance was my childhood. I had a thing about memorizing all the dances in all the songs in all the games I got. I also didn’t actually look at the moves in the corner I just watched the dancer lmao. And when I found out other people didn’t do that I just ???it’s so much easier???? I might’ve projected onto Yancy a lil bit. It’s a fun fic! It is a fun and light-hearted fic, I promise. Couple curse words. TW mention of smoking and cigarettes. That’s about it. I think it could be seen as platonic or romantic. Reader does call him “babe” at one point but I call my friends darling and sweetie so I think it’s fine. Might be a few typos since I never read through my fics lmao. Enjoy!

Word Count: 2.9k

Lunch ended and you immediately shot up out of your chair, making your way down the hall. Your friends stared after you, slightly offended you didn’t even bother saying goodbye. You would have any other day, but this was important.

You stomped your way to the warden's office, pushing past the guards who mostly just gave you confused looks. You would have made your way around them, asking them to make some room, but this was important.

You kicked the door open and stomped up to the desk. The warden jumped and put a hand over his heart. You were not an aggressive person. Really, you weren’t. But this. This was important. This was the most important thing you ever came up with.

“Jesus, child, you ever heard of knocking?” He breathed, exasperated. He looked like he was gonna keep talking, so you slammed your hands on his desk. A few months before, he probably would have had you thrown in solitary for even walking in there. But you’re a good person, and you behave for the most part. So he raised an eyebrow and waited for you to make whatever point you wanted to make.

“Wii,” you said, simply. He blinked a couple times.

“Beg pardon?” He laughed. You were on a bit of a power trip and wanted to respond with “then beg”, but the conversation probably would have ended there. You made it this far without breaking down, you couldn’t stop now.

“I want a Wii,” you said, slowly. The warden squinted at you before chuckling a little. You glared daggers at him. Laugh at you, will he?!

“Now, kiddo, that ain’t--”

“Shut up. I don’t care. I just need you to listen.” He gave you a look and leaned back in his chair. You quieted for a moment, thinking about exactly what you were gonna say. You honestly hadn’t thought you’d make it this far.

“Go ahead, I’m a busy man,” He shook you out of your thoughts. You squared your shoulders.

“Yancy likes to dance,” you stated. You stared at each other in silence for a moment as you prepared your words in your head. He waved his hand, telling you to keep going. You cleared your throat, “Yancy likes to dance… and we don’t have access to the internet.”

“And you’re not going to.” He warned.

“Yeah, yeah, I figured…” You sighed. “But that’s not what I’m here for.” He knitted his eyebrows together in intrigue.

“Alright…” He leaned forward, arms on his desk.

“Yancy can’t keep coming up with songs and dances when he gets bored. It takes a long time, and he’s getting burned out. I think that if we had another- if we had access to prepared dances and songs, it’d be better.” You stuttered. That’s okay. As long as he was listening. “I think if we had a… a game, a dancing game. Like Just Dance on the Wii or something, then we’d be better. Happier? I mean, we’re happy, but… more-more happy. There’s never… too much… happy…” You lost yourself towards the end there. You started shaking a little as the whole situation hit you like a train. What the hell were you doing? This is a PRISON, not a middle school. Why would they want you to be happy? Oh, this was a stupid idea… no. You made it this far. Sure this was stupid, but you were NOT going to back down. Not until you got a-

“Ok.”

“Huh?” You asked, dumbfounded. You stared at Mr. Murder-Slaughter, and he stared right back. “What’d you say?” He stood up from his desk and walked over to you. You fought the urge to book it and stood your ground. You puffed up your chest a little to look intimidating. From the smirk he got on his face, it wasn’t working.

“I said, ok.” Your shoulders dropped and you let out a shaky breath.

“Really? I mean… really?”

“Sure, why not. Boosts morale, stops people from wanting to escape.” He shrugged. You stood there, mouth agape, probably looking like a moron.

“Thanks.” You murmured. He smiled at you, and you smiled right back. He took your shoulders and spun you around towards the door.

“Yeah, yeah, now get outta here! You’ve got dishes to do!” He pushed you out, and you gave him one last smile before running down to the kitchen. He watched you trip over your own feet and shook his head. You ran past a guard, who heard the noise and got confused.

“What the hell was all that?”

“Fuck around and find out!”

---

You startled awake to the sound of talking coming from outside your cell. You rubbed your eyes and looked around, not seeing your cellmate. You sighed and managed to lift yourself up out of the bed. You stretched and heard your back crack in several places. That sounded… worrying to say the least, but you had other things on your mind. For example: where was everyone?

You made your way through the prison, eventually ending up in the common room where everyone was talking over each other excitedly.

“Sorry, forgot to set the alarm!” A guard apologized. You nodded at him. You turned and saw Tiny and slid over next to her.

“What’re we doing? Is it Thursday already?” You whispered.

“Nah, warden bought a game system,” she answered. You stared at her, mouth open slightly. “Keep staring at me we’re gonna fight.”

“Uh, sorry.” You blinked and looked forward, standing on the tips of your toes to try and get a better look. “What gaming system?”

“A Wii. Warden said we each get 30 minutes per week.” She explained. She then waited for you to respond. You didn’t.

“Dude, you alright?” She gently reached out and shook your arm.

“Hm? Oh, yeah, I’m good.” You mumbled. “He buy any games yet?”

“Uhhhhh Super Mario Bros, Kirby’s Epic Yarn, Animal Crossing, Smash…”

“Mm-hm, mm-hm, as he should.”

“I think those Wii Sports games…”

“Just Dance?”

“Don’t know. Said to talk to him if there’s a game you want.” You nodded and gave her a small fistbump before walking over to the warden, who stood away from the group. You leaned over and saw BamBam and Sparkles in a heated game of Smash Bros. You stood next to the warden and watched.

“So, you actually listened to my request?” You looked up at him in slight disbelief.

“Course I did. Why not? Like I said, boosts morale.” He smiled. You nodded and you both looked forward again.

“How much was it?” You inquired.

“$100 on eBay.”

“Deadass?!”

“Absolutely. Great condition, too. Been used before, but not necessarily broken.”

“Come with the games?” “Some. Had to tell the guy I was buying it for my foster kids for him to give them to me. Them along with the Wii is what made it $100.” He explained

“So, we’re your kids now?” You snickered.

He only answered with a hum. You looked at him, blinking rapidly.

“What?” He said in a defensive tone.

“Nothing! Don’t worry about it!” You waved him off. He crossed his arms in a huff but dropped it.

“Buy Just Dance?”

“In the back. Saving it for when Yancy shows up.”

“Shows up? He’s not here?” “No. He went to the yard when everyone gathered here.” You hummed and looked down, thinking.

Why did Yancy leave? Did he not care about it? Did he not want to play? That would complicate things a little…

“Instead of speculating, why don’t you go ask him?” He scoffed. You looked at the warden, scandalized.

“You’re an easy person to read, child.” He set a hand on your shoulder. “He might be out in the yard.” You sighed and walked away from the cheering crowd as BamBam pumped his fists triumphantly and Sparkles fell to his knees.

---

You opened the door to the yard, peeking out to see if anyone was there. Lo and behold, there he was, Yancy, sitting on the grass having a smoke. You walked over to where he was and plopped down next to him. He jumped a little, but breathed harshly once he saw it was you.

“Whatcha doin’ out here?” You queried, softly.

“Hm.” He grunted in response.

“Everyone’s inside… having some fun…”

“Hm…”

“I think Jimmy might play Animal Crossing…”

“Hm.”

“Yancy, what’s wrong?” You sighed and turned your body towards him a little.

“Nothin’, nothin’s wrong.” He lied. “C’mon, man, we both know that’s a lie.” You tilted your head to look at him. He avoided your eyes.

“Yancy.” You said sternly. He faltered a little hearing your concern. He glanced at you. Your eyes softened. “What’s wrong?”

“Is just… I never really gots to play games when I was young… and… I dunno… don’t know… how to...” He mumbled. You nodded in understanding, shifting until your shoulders were touching his. You stared at the fence while Yancy kept smoking. You tried not to cough when he exhaled his smoke, but you couldn’t help it. He looked at you apologetically before putting the cigarette out on the grass. You both sat there for a little, enjoying each other’s company.

“So…” you breathed out after a little while. He turned to you with an eyebrow raised. “You’re upset because you don’t know how to play the games?”

“‘N I’ll look stupid while playing ‘em, yeah.” He finished with a scoff. A smile grew on your face.

“I know a game that’ll be really easy for you…” you sang. He furrowed his eyebrows at you.

“...what is it?” He hesitated. You bit your lip to keep from giggling as he looked at you worriedly.

---

“Wait, so… the hell is Just Dance?” Yancy scratched his head as you led him back to the common room. It was late, and everybody else was back in their cells. You convinced a guard to let you out by pretending you were gonna cry.

“It’s a game where you dance,” You said in a condescending tone. “Come on, Yance, use deductive reasoning.”

“I’on even know what that means,” He argued playfully. You brought him to the small TV, handing him a remote as you turned it on.

“It just… There are songs with dances prepared, and you have to do the dances as you see them on screen. Got it?” You looked up at Yancy, who was busy staring at the glowing screen of the tv. It was on the Wii home menu, so there wasn’t much to see. However, to Yancy, it was one of the coolest things he’d ever seen.

“Whoa whoa whoa, wassat?” He pointed at the screen and jumped a bit when he saw the cursor move as he moved the remote. He shifted it over until it was on the Mii Channel.

“Uh… that’s the place where you can make a little avatar of yourself. It works on some of the games, but not Just Dance.” You explained. “...you wanna make a Mii?” He pouted and gave you puppy dog eyes. You rolled your eyes and stood up, bringing your Player One cursor on the screen and clicking the channel.

You told Yancy the mechanics, how to change everything, and what to do once he was done. You made your own Mii, explaining everything along the way, and told him to make his once you were done. Yancy, being the creative boy he is, spent half an hour on his Mii, trying to get everything perfect. You just stood next to him, trying not to yawn. Like I said, it was late. Eventually, he finished and you both got to see your Mii’s next to each other, along with some other people’s. He kept dragging his over next to you, trying to force them to interact. He got very upset when you told him they couldn’t hug or anything. He let you exit out of the channel and go into Just Dance.

“Any particular song?” You scrolled through the songs, letting them play for a couple seconds so he could know what each was like.

“Stop!” He called. “Go back.” You scrolled back to the last song you let play.

“Britney Spears? Serious?” You teased. It was all in good fun, you loved her too. Who wouldn’t?

He grumbled a little to himself. It sounded a little like “not my fault her songs bop”. You breathed out a chuckle and clicked the song, whisper-singing the lyrics as you did.

“My loneliness is killin’ me… Blue, green, orange, or pink?” You asked. After not getting an answer, you looked at Yancy to see the problem. He was frowning at the screen. “Yance?”

“Why’re they all girls?”

“Because it’s a traditionally girl-ish song.”

“I’m not a girl.”

“I know you’re not. Just pick a color.”

“Why are they cheerleaders?”

“Because they can be. Yancy, pick a color.”

“But why-”

“Yancy I swear to God pick a fucking color.” He hummed and then picked blue. You picked green.

You got into the same stance as the girl on the screen, and Yancy copied you. The music started up, and you started dancing. Yancy seemed a bit startled as he hurried to copy you. He wheezed out a little laugh, flailing his arms a little, trying to figure out what move you were on. You bit your lip to not laugh at him. You both kept going, and Yancy eventually got into the rhythm. He stuck his tongue out in concentration and you stared for a moment, not believing how adorable he was. Then you remembered that there was a winner in this game so you shook your head and kept dancing.

Eventually the song ended, and you both breathed a little harder than normal. You looked at your scores, and found that you'd won. You clapped your hands and cheered. Yancy crossed his arms.

"Whatever, this is my first time!" He scoffed. But you could see the smile on his face. You stretched your arms and yawned, turning the Wii off and leaving the remote.

"Welp, we should get back--" you turned to head towards your cell.

"No!" Yancy stood in front of you. You tried to go around him, but he kept blocking your way. He grabbed your shoulders and held you in place.

"I want a rematch."

"Yancy, it's late…" you whined.

"Just one more! Please?" He pleaded. He, again, gave you those puppy dog eyes you could never say no to. You sighed loudly, grabbing the remote again and turning the Wii back on.

"I don't understand why you can't do this yourself…" you mumbled, clicking on Just Dance again.

"I… like spending time with you," he said softly. You squinted at him.

"You'd feel awkward dancing alone, huh?"

"Yeah…"

"Fine."

"Ooh! Let's do--"

"Nah, nah, nah. You're keeping me up. I get to pick the song."

"...'This is Halloween'?"

"Bet your ass."

"But that--"

"Shut it, Yancy, I'll leave."

"Okay! Sorry…

"..."

"...can I be the pumpkin?"

"Of course you can be the pumpkin, babe."

---

You woke up really tired in the morning. You didn't know when you got back to bed, but the guard that let you out was asleep by the door when you arrived. You didn't even consider escaping, you were so tired. You just entered the cell and shut the door behind you.

In the morning, you got up and dragged yourself into the common room again. Everyone was playing the Wii again. You rubbed your eyes and stood next to Tiny.

"Fuck happened to you?" She scoffed.

"Yancy happened…" you yawned

"Ah. Long night, huh?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Ye-no. Wait, what? No, gross. We played Just Dance."

"Oh, was it fun?"

"For the first couple. The rest I was way too tired to be happy about…"

"Aw, did wittle baby need theiw nap?" She teased.

"I'm not wi-little! I'm not-I'm not little! Shut up!" You complained as she laughed.

"Well, Jimmy played Wii tennis against a guard. Now he's playing the warden."

"Seriously? Oh my God."

"He's currently the reigning champion."

"Who's going against him next?" You hear a thud, like someone fell.

"Got-dang it!" Mr. Murder-Slaughter yelled.

“That’d be me,” She patted you on the back before walking up next to Jimmy. Mr. Murder-Slaughter passed her as she walked, limping. He stood by you.

“You seem to be having fun.” You teased.

“Ah, shut it…” He growled and rubbed his arm. “How’s Yancy?”

“He’s good. He likes the game a lot.” You explained.

“I’d hope so, otherwise there was no reason to buy this thing.” He scoffed.

“Eh… I dunno about that…” You listened to Tiny laugh loudly from where she stood in front and smiled. You turned your head a little and saw Yancy leaning against the opposite wall. You caught each other’s eyes. He nodded his head to the Wii. You shrugged and walked up. He did the same.

Once Tiny and Jimmy were done with their match, Jimmy keeping his title as champion, you and Yancy walked up to the wii, taking the remotes and clicking Just Dance.

“What song should we do?” You scrolled through the list.

“Avril Lavigne!” Someone yelled from the back of the room. You had a sneaking suspicion of who it was, but kept it to yourself.

“Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne it is!” You clicked the song.

“Uh… I don’t know this song, bud,” He whispered to you. You clapped a hand on his shoulder.

“Oh you’re gonna love it.”

“I’m not sure I like that look.”

“Calm down, it’ll be great.”

“Okay… can i be the punk girl?”

“I wanna be the punk girl…”

Cue the puppy eyes…

“...fine, you can be the punk girl.”

#yancy iplier #yancy markiplier #ahwm yancy #yancy x reader #yancy x y/n #yancy x you #yancy x gn!reader #yancy x male!reader #yancy x female!reader #x reader #x reader fanfiction #x male!reader #x female!reader #x gender neutral reader #ahwm x reader #markiplier egos x reader #markiplier ego fanfic

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callmearcturus · 4 years

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the fucking problem with nintendo and why you absolutely should pirate from them is this

lets say you want to play earthbound. hell, you are willing to pay money to play earthbound. you would like to own this game.

well you can get it exclusively two places: the 3DS eshop or the SNES Classic

unfortunately the SNES Classic is widely sold out. there isn’t one for purchase with 100 miles of my location. you could get it used on ebay but that’s not actually paying Nintendo. the original creators will not see a dime of that.

so the only other way is to buy a 3DS/2DSXL, which will run your at least a hundred dollars but probably more, and then buy it digitally for 10$ through that eshop.

wait, why isn’t it on the switch? after all, nintendo switch online provides a library of games for you to play!

well the library isn’t static, it changes every month or so, with some games leaving and some new ones appearing, but at any given time, you’ll have 3 kirby games, a zelda game, four mario games, and star fox.

do you want to play anything outside of that? well gee golly, the thing is nintendo absolutely can do that, they have the ability, it would frankly be easy..... but they aren’t gonna.

why?

because.... i actually don’t know. a lot of people speculate on why. if you missed it, a few years ago, before Switch Online was announced, nintendo sued a lot of ROM sharing sites to get them taken down and collect damages on the downloads. at that time, the games journalism sphere speculated “oh that fucking sucks but maybe that means Switch Online will finally give us access to the back catalog for a monthly fee. that’d be great!”

so you can play mario now if you want. that’s about it.

i do not know why nintendo is like this. i don’t know why they simultaneously place immense value on their work (how DARE you pirate their games) but also place zero value on their work (uuuugh you want to like buy an OLD GAME? why. no) but it’s frankly horseshit.

also i use the example of earthbound to show just how much you have to pay to play one fucking game that they HAVE, that is EASY for them to make accessible to you, that they CHOOSE not to. but what about more obscure games? did you ever hear of ardy lightfoot? no? well its a game i played as a child for literally weeks. i was never good enough to finish the game bc i was a kid, but i’ve always wanted to play it again.

i can’t, bc it’s not part of the CLASSIQUES and so nintendo will never make it available, even though we literally know from reporting they have all these games ready to go anytime.

and that is why its moral and right to pirate from fuckign nintendo. because they helped forge the history of gaming, but they don’t give a shit to preserve it in any way, so we have to do it ourselves.

#fuck nintendo

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darkarfs · 3 years

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single moments from the Trump presidency that would have defined/ended any other politician’s career

- saying he could “buy Greenland” - suggesting it was a good idea to nuke hurricanes - saying there would be fewer forest fires if we just got rid of all the leaves - asking Trudeau if Canada had tried to burn down the White House - autographing pictures of shooting victims - when he kept talking about how they drop bowling balls on cars to test them in japan and no one could figure out where he could have even gotten the idea - when he suggested Seoul should just move away from the North Korean border - introducing West Virginia’s governor as ‘the largest, most beautiful man’ - when he tweeted SEE YOU IN COURT! right after an appeals court ruled against him. like. yeah man. they just did. - the time he didn't know how to close an umbrella so he just dropped it and walked away - fighting with the Vietnam vets over whether napalm or agent orange is used in the Ride of the Valkyries scene in Apocalypse Now and then when they insisted it was napalm, Trump said they disagreed with him because they didn't like the movie (The line is famously, literally “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”) - using his position as the single most powerful person in the world to promote Goya canned beans - when he bragged about the crowd size at the hurricane shelter in coastal Texas (”what a turnout”) - signing Bibles. What. - thinking the F-22 is invisible to the naked eye - smiling and giving a thumbs up during a photo op with a baby orphaned by a mass shooting - putting a candy bar on a Minion’s head because he’s never interacted with a child before - when he interpreted some stray comment about transparency in the process to mean his border wall should literally be transparent, so passersby are not beaned by bundles of drugs and cans being thrown over the wall - the time he talked about having to flush his massive dumps 10 times and then immediately tried to blame the dumps on his supporters - the fake Sharpee’d hurricane map, which he did solely to not appear wrong on television - suggesting that federal employees working unpaid during the gov shutdown should just “do a work around” at the grocery store if they can’t pay for groceries - the fucking eclipse thing - the fucking three-pointers with paper towels to Puerto Rican hurricane victims - when he told thousands of Boy Scouts a story about his rich friend's fuckboat and then complained about Hilary for the remainder of the speech - when the called the CEO of Lockheed Martin “Marilyn Lockheed” (her last name is Hewson) which was objectively funnier than “Tim Apple” - when he picked an argument with Baltic world leaders because he thought the Baltics were the Balkans - the first time his team had a meeting in the cabinet room they couldn’t figure out how to turn on the lights and ended up just having the meeting in the dark - The time he said Andrew Jackson was "really angry that he saw what was happening with regard to the Civil War, he said 'There's no reason for this.'" (Jackson died 16 years before the Civil War, and he owned 150 slaves.) - told a 7-year-old boy there was no Santa Claus on Christmas - the team of staffers whose only job was to tape back together documents he had torn up because he’s just THAT used to destroying evidence, because they couldn’t get him to stop ripping them up, but legally, the documents had to be archived - when he said the Continental Army took over the British airports during the Revolution - no sanctions on Russian soldiers killing American soldiers - “I take no responsibility for this pandemic.” - when touring the damage the Louisiana gulf coast after Hurricane Laura (just a few months ago!), he started giving first responders autographed pieces of paper, which he told them to sell on eBay for $10,000 - when he thought "clean coal" meant that the miners dug it out of the ground and physically cleaned it - the goddamn fast food catering - trying to trick the family of a teen killed by a US diplomat's wife who fled justice into meeting her, Ellen-style - pushing the Prime Minister of Montenegro out of the way to preen - that time he called into Fox & Friends and ranted for so long that they politely but firmly kicked him off - hiring an Obama impersonator solely to berate him - having a button installed on his desk that let him order Diet Coke on a whim. And sometimes using that button upwards of 13 times a day. - that time when a kid handed him a hat to sign, and he signed the hat, but instead of handing it back, he just threw it into the middle of the crowd - autographing the guestbook at the Holocaust memorial, with an added “had such a great time!” - when he zoned out and wondered where a woman's dead relatives were DIRECTLY after she had said her mother six brothers were killed. (Actual exchange: “They killed my mother, my six brothers...” “Where are they now?”) - sending 2,000 soldiers to the border to stop “the caravan,” having their pictures taken, and then recalling them all. - consoling a dead soldier’s family by saying “he knew what he was getting into.” - when he said no one could climb over the border wall because there would be no way down, and then belatedly remembered rope - when he congratulated the Great Lakes on their "record deepness" - calling Elizabeth Warren “Pocahontas” at an event meant to honor Navajo code talkers - “Shithole countries” - calling Baltimore “rat-infested” - tweeting “too bad!” right after Elijah Cummings’ house was broken into - calling the White House “a dump” a month into moving in, which led to first both him and Melania, and then just Melania by herself, staying in Trump Tower for almost 5 months, costing taxpayers around $100,000 a day - an entire quarter of his presidency spent on his own golf courses, costing taxpayers around $141,000,000, NOT counting the Secret Service detail (they were charged for rooms and golf carts, since these were Trump’s OWN golf courses) - using “Pocahontas” again to slur Elizabeth Warren while talking down to a Native American journalist - holding a rally in Pittsburgh and trying to woo the locals by ranting about how the statue of Joe Paterno, the accused pedophilia enabler who was coach of a rival sports team, should go back up - confusingly having bigger salt and pepper shakers than everyone else in his administration, because everything to him is a dick-measuring contest - when he said he would “run in and take care of” school shooters, to school shooting victims - appointing fucking DeVos, Miller, Pompeo, Mnuchin, Nunes - inciting a seditious white supremacist mob to make sure he’s president until he’s 85, resulting in 5 dead (for which I am constantly wondering...”really? FOR THIS GUY?”) - drafted a proposal to open 94% of previously protected American shorelines to offshore drilling - when he walked up the stairs to Air Force One with toilet paper stuck to his shoe - at least 44 times in March, April and early May in which he downplayed the threat of the virus calling it “very well under control” again and again - when somebody asked him his favorite book and he pointed at a bookshelf and said “there are some over there” - meeting with the goddamn MyPillow guy to discuss overturning election results and declaring martial law - impeached twice, was golfing both times the vote went through - 70 pardons for known criminals (including Bannon), 70 sentences commuted, just to be a spiteful little toad - when he blathered on about how much he loved the queen, the totally hacked her off - when Hope Hicks steamed his pants as he was wearing them - getting mad-pissed at White House kitchen staff because they couldn’t recreate McDonald’s and it was too late to order and I wonder how much I missed. I bet there’s a McSweeney’s article listing all of it.

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survey--s · 2 years

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91.

Last thing you bought online? Did you like it? Some sweets I used to get as a child - and yes, they didn’t disappoint, lol.

Could you date someone who didn’t drive (and didn’t show an interest in ever getting their license, either)? No (unless they couldn’t drive for medical reasons) as we live rurally and not being able to drive is hugely limiting. I also wouldn’t want to have to be the one who gives someone lifts all the time.

How would you react if your artwork became famous? I don’t make any artwork.

Would you get your nipples pierced? No. How many people know your birthday? I mean, enough people, I guess.

Has anyone ever tried to ruin a relationship you were in? I’m sure they have, yeah.

Have you ever watched a whole hour-long infomercial? I’ve probably had one on in the background for that long, yeah.

What is your current MySpace song? How old is this survey? lol.

What is your favorite kind of meat to put on your sandwich? Roast pork.

Which one of your exes do you feel like you have the most chemistry with? Joshua.

How do you feel about people who make Facebook profiles for their pets? I mean, I wouldn’t do it, but people can do whatever they want. It’s not like having fake profile for pets is harming anyone.

Have you ever personally known a pair of conjoined twins? No, but that would be pretty cool, I’m not going to lie.

What was the most disturbing thing you have ever heard your mother say? I’ve never actually heard her say anything too disturbing.

Is there something in particular you like to look at photos of? What is it? Animals and nature - I like scenery/sunsets especially.

Chewy chocolate-chip cookies: like or dislike? LOVE.

If your boyfriend/girlfriend wanted to dress only in the opposite sex’s clothing, would you support that? If not, would you leave them? I would support them but I wouldn’t stay with them. It wouldn’t be what I signed up for and it’s not something I really...get, in all honesty.

Do you think your grandmother is/was beautiful? One of them definitely was - inside and out. The other was a thoroughly unpleasant woman.

Which of your fields of interest are you a total expert on? Just dogs in general, I guess.

When was the last time you got all dolled up? Our wedding day, lol.

Do you ever name objects? (i.e. mp3 players, guitars, cars, etc.) I used to name cars and stuff but no, I don’t really do that anymore.

Do you have a criminal record? Nope.

Last person you took a nap with? Archie, lol. He’s a good nap buddy.

Does seeing your mother cry automatically make you feel sad as well? Absolutely, though I’ve only seen her cry a couple of times.

Do you think someone likes the same person you like? No.

Do you want your life to stay the way it is right now forever? Nope. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life but I’d get really bored if nothing ever changed ever again.

Have you ever been to craigslist.com? No, it’s not a thing here.

What about eBay? Yeah, I use it fairly regularly for stuff for work.

Have you ever used Nair? Once as a teenager. It smelt SO bad though, lol.

Are you medicated? Not anymore, but I definitely have been in the past.

Do you shape/fill in your eyebrows? Yeah, I do.

Have you ever stolen/borrowed clothes from an ex? Borrowed, sure.

Could you make a statement about anything political? I mean, I could but I don’t really want to get into politics right now.

Do you think you’ve already met your soulmate? I don’t believe in soulmates.

Do you get the feeling something good will happen in your life soon? I mean, I always want good things to happen lol.

Do you enjoy romantic movies, even when they’re cliche? Sure, I love watching them sometimes.

Have you been to McDonald’s in the past month? Yeah, we went back in December when we went to Workington.

Have you ever slept over at your best friend’s house? Yes.

How often do you go bowling? Pretty much never, as our nearest bowling alley is hours away from us lol.

Last time you were in an apartment? Uh, when I lived in one back in 2016.

Have you ever seen a live seahorse? Sure, at aquariums or whatever.

Would you like to have your own yacht? No, they’re a lot of money to upkeep and I get seasick, lol.

Winnie the Pooh or Tigger? Winnie the Pooh. Tigger always really annoyed me as a child, lol.

What’s the unhealthiest thing you’ve eaten today? Probably the dorito chips and/or the chocolate chip cookie

Has a stranger ever offered to buy you a drink? Yeah, loads of times. I barely paid for any drinks as a teenager, lol.

What is something you’d be happy to receive as a gift, that doesn’t cost a lot? Wax melts.

What kind of music does your significant other/crush like to listen to? Dance and rap music mostly. We don’t agree when it comes to music, lol.

Who did you have your first kiss with? Do you remember what color his/her eyes were? Jimmi, and he had brown eyes.

Are there any themes from TV shows that you like to sing along to? Friends, Big Bang Theory and Cheers.

Do you eat dessert after dinner? Sometimes, but not everyday, it really depends on my mood and what I’ve eaten for dinner as well.

Have you ever had too much to drink and felt embarrassed about your behavior the next day? Yes, but I don’t really drink at all these days.

When you go out drinking, what do you prefer to drink? Cocktails or mixers.

What was the last animal that you saw? There are two cats within my line of sight, lol. Toby is asleep on his cat tree and Purrlock is asleep on the floor by the window.

What was the last thing that you said to one of your siblings? I don’t have any siblings but I saw my sister-in-law on Tuesday and we just chatted while the dogs played.

What is the most expensive thing that you’ve purchased that you paid for: The house? lol.

What is your favorite messaging program? I just use Messenger and WhatsApp.

Do you eat fast food more than 5 times a week? No.

Have you ever almost drowned? Nope.

Have you ever learned something shocking about someone through Facebook? I’m sure that I have, yeah.

What’s the scariest living animal that you’ve petted? I don’t know - it depends how you define scary, I guess?

Do you remember the first conversation you ever had with the person you currently have feelings for? Yes.

Do you dread certain days of the week? If yes, what day/s and why? No, all my days are different really, which is nice as it means I never really get stuck in a rut with hating certain days like I have done in previous jobs.

If you eat oatmeal, do you have it plain or do you have certain toppings that you like to add to it? I can’t stand it plain - I like it with fruit or cinnamon.

What is the funniest or strangest thing you’ve ever heard somebody say in their sleep? Plenty of things I’m sure, but nothing comes to mind right now.

Choose one - Butterfinger, Milky Way, Snickers: Snickers.

Do you use Mozilla Firefox? No. I use Safari.

Who is your favorite person to hug? Michael.

Have you ever had to have a mug shot? No.

What was the last thing you carried to your room? Clean laundry to put away.

When was the last time you had a late-night phone call? About five years ago, lol.

#survey #surveys #questions

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