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voidselfshipp · 3 years

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Tender heart

Ok to rb

Cw:violence, underwater scene and food ment.

Jerico yawned stretching on the bed,her foot hits someones legs and she quickly snaps around.

Luckily wamai hasnt woken up yet.

She sighed figuring she must of have Fallen asleep while talking to him.

She couldnt quite place it,bit when talking to the kenyan Man there was something about his voice that was just so comforting, and it felt like home.

She stood up out of bed, a familiar sensation of claws appeared on her shoulder signaling that sunshine was awake.

Jeri opens the blinds, the perks of working here is that she gets a beautiful view of the sea.

Hearing the bed rustling she smiles as the Man Turned to face her still asleep.

"Cute"she thinks to herself as she walks to her closet,trying to make the smallest ammount of noise possible as to not wake up the Man.

She takes her trusty turtle neck sweater and some other clothes and pair of combat boots to then sneak out the door and walk to the showers.

She took maybe an hour in the shower,figuring by now that ngugi would be awake and gone.

Nope,hes still asleep.

Jer found it both amusing and cute, she sat besides him softly stroking his curly hair.

--hey ngugi, wake up--she said softly,the Man grunts and opens his eyes.

Her hand retreats from his hair and she smiles.

--morning--his voice is deep and raspy, he sits up stretching and making his neck pop--what hour is it?

--Its like...six am , why?

The Man quickly jumps out of bed--Ive got to go quickly! Kali is going to kick my ass if I dont get there right now

Jerico stood up giggling at the sudden informalness of wamai, putting a hand on his shoulder--First you need a shower and some food,hurry your ass up and meet me at the cafeteria--the Man stutters an excuse- ah-ah no ifs and or buts, shower and food first

She pats his chest playfully and walks outside with her eagle flying behind her.

The kenyan Man looks away and chuckles to himself, she surely was interesting.

While jerico waited for ngugi she sat there on the cafeteria with a couple of books and some paperwork.

--¿en que estamos trabajando?--(what are we working on?) She smiled at the familiar accent.

--Nada boludeces del trabajo(nothing just some silly work things).

Flores chuckles,resting his head on his hand-- tenes una pinta de cansada (you look tired)

Jeri nodded stretching-- odio tener que levantarme temprano boludo--(I hate having to wake up early dude)

He nodds in agreement, And they talk for a bit, shed laugh at his jokes and he would at hers, with the ocasional flirting in between.

Wamai however did not find this amusing as the second he entered the cafeteria he heard jeris laughs,his blood seemed to boil as he noticed who was with her.

--Im sorry but this spot Is taken--he said slamming a hand on the table.

--Hey Man--santiago said--we just talkin' a Man cant talk with his friend?

Another stern look forced the Argentine Man to leave,not before winking at jerico and patting her arm--bueno me rajan, me voy preciosa--(aight,theyre throwing me out, goodbye beautiful) he said walking away.

She giggles turning to wamai--Jeez jealous much ngugi?

Wamai sighs--My apologies I.. I dont know what took over me

Jeri shakes her head with a soft smile-- its okay, it was rather cute, but go get your food come on

After eating breakfast both went to their responsabilities.

--Bueenas!--(hello!)she said walking to Zero who was happy to see her.

--Hey, youre here what took ya so long?

She shrugged pulling her fluffy jacket closer,it was a rather windy day.

--Come here--he opened his jacket and she hid under it.

--Thanks

--Dont mention it

At one point jerico herself had to train, under her sweater was a sports top.

Now maybe it was the fact that she didnt sleep that well, maybe the fact that she had her mind in the clouds,but she was getting her ass handed to her in hand to hand combat.

This came with the sassy remarks of kali as jeri called it a day and was putting her sweater and blazer back on.

--If thats how her father trained her, I cant imagine how himself must be, a miracle he didnt die on the Battlefield

Jers hearing was somewhat supernatural, because for starters she wasnt one-hundred percent human.

She grunted trying to Keep her composture picking up her bag with sunshine perched on her shoulder.

Another sassy remark came as she Walked past jaimini--all those medals her father has? They are worthless,how did he let his daughter go into the military?, she inst built for this.

She Turned around walking to kali--the fuck you said to me?

Wamai who was running on the threadmill approached both women.

The other operators, specially smoke and mute took a look at what was happening.

--Im just saying that you and your father arent military material--jamini said-- you got your ass handed to you,If this is how the von-terras fight then its a miracle you made it this F--

She didnt finish because jerico punched her right on the nose, smoke and mute jump in keeping her from kicking kalis ass.

Wamai holds back his boss who looks at jerico in surprise.

--talking shit about me? I dont mind, but dont you ever, EVER talk about my father like that,Next time I wont be too kind,sushine nos vamos (we're leaving)

The eagle flied behind her owner, she should probably get her bloody knuckles checked,but that didnt matter at the moment.

Harry would totally hear about that fight one way or another, but that wasnt important right now.

She sat there in her Office looking at the painting of her dad and her when she was young.

How old was she?,she cant recall the exact number but she does remember that painting.

She smiled as the sunrays hit the painting.

--i hope im not interrupting anything-- Zero said.

--Not at all Sam, what happened?

The Man sat infront of her--Harry got Word of what happened during training, hes letting this one pass because you were justified, he'll talk with kali and he recomended you take the Next two days off

--And you came all this way for that?

Fisher stood up and Walked over to her giving her a quick hug.

She hugged back--Thanks..I really needed it

--And another thing, youre Burning up

Jer nodds lifting her hands from her desk in order to not literally set it ablaze.

The only three people that knew about jericos "identity" were Harry,Sam and ash.

She did as she was told and at night she went for a swim in the beach.

The water sizzled as she entered all the rage dissipated in the water as she quietly sings to herself.

She felt a pair of arms hugging her from behind--may I join you?

She chuckled and softly elbowed wamai on the stomach --Yeah you May

Both talk quietly,trying to avoid the topic of todays fight, even then they were still Friends.

--Hey wanna see something cool?--She asked

--uh...sure?

--follow me!-- she dived under the water and he did the same, they were far off the shore, walking on the sand.

Wamai was puzzled at the fact that she wasnt holding her breath but rather...breathing underwater.

Its the same thing that always catched his attention, she seemed to be super human almost

Hes about to say something but then a soft glow catched his attention what ngugi saw he couldnt Belive.

Massive fishes of every color,they glowed Giant octopi casually swiming above them.

And a song, he couldnt hear the words,but It came from the sea, he felt the beat in his whole body, as if the Ocean was speaking to him

Jerico let him walk around the fish for a bit, finding the cuteness of his Curiosity endearing.

But eventually they had to leave.

They Swim back to the shore.

--Wasnt that cool?

--How did you knew about that? How come i never saw any of that while diving?

Jer giggled putting a hand on his shoulder--Sometimes things dont want to be seen

She offered her hand and he took it walking close to her with her head on his shoulder..

They arrived to the dormitories--And...wamai one thing..

--Yeah?

--Nor kali, or anyone can know about what you saw, got it?

He nodded, and softly stopped jerico from leaving, taking her hand--Thanks for showing me that...its nothing like I ever seen..

He took some steps forward, and so did she.

He leaned in and she did the same.

Jerico cups his cheeks and kisses him, he kissed back tilting his head, leaning a bit.

They press their foreheads togheter.

--Ill see you later then?

He nodds kissing her again--sweet dreams jerico

--Sweet dreams ngugi

When she got to her room she collapsed on the bed sighing like a fool in love.

Sunshine curled besides her,looking at her owner with a smug smile.

Jer rolled her eyes softly passing out minutes after.

#tw//violence #tw:violence #thalasophobia cw #cw thalassophobia #food ment #ngugi/wamai #💙me traes loco💙#sam/zero #🦉💙shot straight to my heart💙🦉

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benreyplush · 3 years

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ok so

benny is some sort of benrey clone after some weird shit happened when benrey was defeated and made his way back into gordon’s games like payday 2.

he somehow got into terraria and has no memory of black mesa or who he was even based off of. he barely remembers his name and all it came out to him was “benny”

he’s also freakishly tall

when jack (the world’s guide) found him, he was very quiet and seemingly apathetic about his surroundings. didn’t really talk much and jack thought he was an enigma for a while. he did his usual and helped him begin his life there.

but then benny started doing some weird shit that jack wasnt prepared for. enemies couldn’t hurt him. he could freeze time. destroy and create items indefinitely. he has no idea what benny is and the order of the guide never talked about anything like this so obviously he’s very freaked out at first

slowly benny starts remembering some of his old personality and would say things that make 0 sense to jack. jack doesn’t know what “poggers” means.

eventually benny remembers a lot of it and actually feels kinda sad. like he feels like he has to be this “benrey” but he doesnt want to be. hes different.

and jack tells him he’s not benrey. he became his own thing and that was good! and he doesnt have to be like him. benny was very relieved by this and sorta became his own thing. like he was still like benrey but less of an asshole and really just goofed around. he still found himself harassing the new npcs that move in but he never harasses jack. he likes jack.

jack says he wont call him benrey. to him, he’s benny. and benny really appreciates it.

jack always wondered what benny meant by “self aware” when he talked about his memories. benny talked about the “npc ai just getting a mind of their own” and said when he joined this new world, it must have turned everyone in terraria self aware like in half life. so thats cool.

eventually jack like. realizes he might have a lil crush on benny and feels bad about it. because he knows his fate is to be sacrificed in the end and he doesnt wanna grow too close to benny.

but inevitably they end up together and jack is starting to question if he needs to die. like originally he came to terms with it a long time ago but now he’s actually reconsidering??? wow! they have at least one argument when jack actually sits him down and explains the wall of flesh thing.

at some point jack convinces benny to take him on an adventure and they end up in the underworld. jack’s plan was to go through with the sacrifice and almost succeeded but benny grabbed him and told him not to do that again. and jack was like “you have to let me do this” and benny was like “no dude i love u” and then they kissed and it was like. the first time either of them have kissed anyone ever but it was still nice.

and jack is like “ok actually i want to live with you forever lets go home” but a demon appears when they arent paying attention and attacks them and jack gets knocked into the lava and the wall of flesh is summoned. and benny is devastated.

when thats over a new guide shows up but benny wants nothing to do with him bc he is not jack. and benny is mad at himself bc he can freeze time, control enemy spawn rates n shit but he cant bring ppl back to life and he feels worthless about it

so the rest of the story is about benny having to move on and accept his death :(

so its a sad story

but here’s some nice things

benny knows the sweet voice still and uses it on jack all the time. it was confusing to them both when he did it the first time. eventually jack gets used to it and actually really likes it.

jack is supposed to be the helpful npc so he usually keeps himself together but as he grows closer to benny his emotions start coming out more and whenever he’s stressed he can just look at benny and say “sweet voice pls” and benny calms him down with it. benny also uses it to get jack to sleep (”blue and red means its time for bed :)” ) because normally he shouldnt have to but being self aware is tiring.

oh also whenever jack gets burns from the voodoo dolls in the underworld, benny heals them with the sweet voice healing beam :). benny has no idea how he keeps getting burned and eventually just assumes its bc of the furnace and is like “bro stop shoving ur hands in the furnace lol” and jack cant bring himself to tell him the truth so he just goes with it.

benny was the first to confess and he did it by serenading jack with the worst guitar playing that jack has ever heard <3 but it still made him smile. i know he really had to think about it before accepting it bc wall of flesh, can’t get too close, blah blah blah.

plus idk how relationships work in the order of the guide. he probably really didnt expect to get into a relationship and the new guide that comes along probably found it super strange.

anyway this is a lot of text wow im gonna just add on to the post as i think of shit but if u read all of this i am in love with u

EDIT: I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE A HAPPY ENDING

after defeating the moon lord, either the order of the guide or maybe even the spirits of terraria herself brings jack back because benny deserves that after saving all of them.

so benny notices the new guide is gone and was like “weird but whatever” and then he hears someone call out to him. he’s like “ugh what” and turns and its jack and he like. drops his weapon in his hand in shock and takes his eye mask and helmet off to see him properly. like he isnt sure if he’s dreaming or not.

and then he runs to him and grabs him and he’s real holy fuck. so he’s overjoyed and both of them fucking cry (first time jack actually sees ben cry ever!!!) and they kiss n shit and its incredible the end. since the world has been saved, the two live a more domestic life and benny is like “we’re never going to the underworld again ever and also im going to be around u a lot bc i missed u so much and i cant lose u again” so he’s extra clingy but jack is so happy to be back with him that he doesnt care!!!!!

also funny fact but the mechanic was the first npc to move in with them and (i think her name was shayna in my world. will change it if not) was overly annoyed at their constant sappiness before jack was killed. ben was extra affectionate to jack around her bc he likes annoying ppl (except for jack). but when jack comes back from the dead, she still acts annoyed but she’s actually relieved to see benny happy again.

#benny the hero #jack the guide #benguide #im gonna go play terraria now :)#text heavy #holy shit this is so much info

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autisticstarseed · 4 years

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sorry to sound cringe or w/e the fuck but. half the fandom shit you all whine abt being unhealthy is fully normal behavior, we’ve just gotten too used to hiding our like. basic humanity from each other? fiction affects people yall, its supposed to do that, you are supposed to read a story and feel smth, its supposed to engage you, thats 100% how it works, being invested in a fantasy world is literally..... just normal human shit and what fiction straight up exists to do. like. we’ve done it for a while now. we have imagination for a reason. we are supposed to use it in our daily lives. its a human skill. literally why would ppl even make stories if not to impact others. you all cannot in the same fucking breath agree, that certain content which harms others and glorifies awful shit is wrong and should be retaliated against because fiction ofc affects reality, and then go on to do your stupid whiny funnyman fandom cringe bullshit any time you decide people are letting themselves have too much fun in a way that makes you uncomfortable but doesnt hurt you.

like sdjfjsdf okay we get it you dont have interests outside of the 5-10 tumblr accepted ones, you’re a cool unfeeling social media robot that acts like every other dumbass jester craving validation for being abrasive and uncharming to the rest of society but hey at least you can make a shitpost right i get it i get it sure, but its truly not my job to keep validating your personality of being a hypercritical nihilist and i need for you to understand. it is normal. to like media. many different kinds of media. it all exists for people to like it. stop exaggerating and strawmanning every single person you come across that expresses their interests in a divergent way as this like. horribly unhealthy disconnected nerd who is LOST in a fantasy TM and lives in their basement and jerks off to their waifu instead of talking to real people and is ~hurting themselves~ with their lack of social endeavors or w/e. thats not fucking real you idiot passion is regular, its not anybody elses fault you killed yours off bc you wanted to make certain ppl think ur cool. its normal to project, its normal to feel emotional attachments, its normal to ‘let yourself’ like the ‘cringe’ medias, its normal to buy merch or make your own, its normal to make long and depthful content (forreal so much of this ‘support’ for the hard work of artistry can be so conditional and hollow from you guys), its normal to discuss stories from a realism standpoint because again thats generally the intention, and its. just normal to like shit that isnt real sometimes. it rly is. ideas and thoughts can be valuable. fantasies arent completely worthless.

‘’escaping reality’’ with distraction and immersion Can become unhealthy but it doesnt mean you are literally incapable of having critical depthful valuable thoughts on the reality you live in just bc you find daily joy in something unreal as well and you are honest to god the weird one if you cant get that. especially if you try to use peoples harmless passions as a way to like. jab at their harmless identities or their harmless appearance or their harmless fucking ‘i think harmless behaviors should be supported and left alone’ stances. like wow i am ever so fucking Sorry that the CRAZY TM su kins and marvel stim blogs and theatre kids and tiktok cosplayers creating all this cringey content thats meaningful to them and full of effort and passion just Really truly gives you hives bc of your wretched personality and weird fabricated dramatic assumptions abt their personal life and your inability to positively socialize with nonjudgmental people anymore but like honestly at least they act like a real person and their art and fun matters more to me than your bratty cringe feelings ok those mean dick to me they hold no value in my mind and they dont have to its not my responsibility to baby you for your judgments they dont even equate imo like oh my god just go get some interests you loser maybe it’ll cure your bastarditis !

#original #long post #ok to rb light ever y mother fucke rup #like idk just imagine being in class and the teachers like 'what did you think about to kill a mockingbird' and some kids like #kinda cringe that you're making us listen to you talk abt ur favorite book in class......#teacher gives an analysis and the kids liek DUDE YOU SAT DOWN AND WROTE THAT ALL OUT LMFAOOOOO #DID U JUST SIT THERE FOR HOURS DOING THA..T......... OMG GO OUTSIDDDE #like. the literal only honest to god 'cringe' thing i can imagine in this situation is the ppl who act #genuinely devastated and like they are being oppressed bc someone made them cringe.#like.#get up bitch ur fine shfskDJFSDFKLSD

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rogue-of-light · 4 years

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Could I get a quadrant analysis between a mage of void and a knight of heart please? Love your blog by the way!

^OwO^ oh absolutely you can get one anon!!! a Mage of Void and a Knight of Heart quadrant analysis coming right up! ^-w-^ (( bleh! i wish the gif looked prettier on mobile but eh. )) ^-w-^ (( i also should post my quadrants analysis soon, i’ll do that later... )) ^>////<^ (( also thank you for your kind words, im glad you like my blog!! ))

^ ♥️ w ♥️ ^ first up is Matespritship! a matespritship between trolls- as humans would just be boyfriend/girlfriend- (( though both are two separate, yet parallel, things )) focuses on creating/invoking positive emotions- also known as ‘pity’. a matespritship between a Mage of Void and Knight of Heart is possible! i think this relationship has a strong chance to be a soft one, sort of like the ‘two broken souls find one another and learn to love again’ types of stories. i dont have a lot to say about this simply because a lot of matespritship boils down to the trolls personalities. the Mage of Void will most likely be more pessimistic while the Knight of Heart may be more emotionless or try and look cool. this combination most likely wouldnt work well because of the clash, however that isnt to say it 100% wouldnt. trolls and people have complex personalities, opposites attract and the impossible is possible!

^ ♦️ w ♦️ ^ next is Moirallegiance. a moirallegiance is focused on the balance, both mental balance and emotional balance, between both trolls. no one troll should dominate the moirallegiance. in my opinion, the Mage of Void should 100% have a moirail! as for a Mage of Void and a Knight of Heart moirallegiance... i think that it’ll either be super good or super bad!! both parties have deep insecurities- Mage of Void dealing with strong feelings of worthlessness and being ignored while of Knight of Heart is dealing with the fear of being seen for who they genuinely are, plus the self esteem issues both parties have to deal with? this will either be good for both or horrible. ^-w-^ if it does go wrong, it could be because the Mage of Void was unwilling to genuinely tell the Knight how they feel. Being a Mage of Void means they are very good at keeping secrets, so the Knight has no way of knowing without breaching trust. ^-w-^ the Knight of Heart can also turn this relationship sour by keeping their persona up, refusing to allow the Mage into their ‘heart’ so to speak, and seeing their genuine self. They can also toy with peoples emotions seeing as their classpect exploits the heart. ^-w-^ all in all? this moirallegiance strongly depends on if the Mage and Knight honestly trust one another enough to drop their masks to allow growth.

^ ♠️ w ♠️ ^ the final one we will discuss is my favorite, Kismeissitude! Kismeissitude is focused on the mutual respect and frustration, a true rival! it is very important to remember that Kismeissitude isnt built on hatred, rather it is built on knowing your kismeis could be better but for whatever reason they arent. personally, i think the Mage of Void and Knight of Heart could have a strong kismeissitude! admittedly, this is more of a gut feeling then anything analytical, i will still do my best to defend it! for example, the Mage could get frustrated at the Knight for their impulsiveness and their ‘my friends feelings matter very much so shut the fuck up before i throw hands with you regardless of the consequences’ attitude while the Knight could get frustrated at how passive and how they try- and are very successful- in hiding how they feel! both could also get frustrated at the hypocrisy of the other, both of them hiding their ‘true selves/feelings’ so to speak.

^-w-^ this was a long one and my achy wrist proves it, but i hope you like this anon! honestly, the quadrants are one of my favorite things to discuss! i didnt include the ashen quadrant because, well... i dont see the kismeissitude getting to that point. rather, at worse the two would just break up- at least from my point of view. ^-w-^ however you know best anon!! dont take my word as law, rather take it as my thoughts- which it is! ^=w=^ it is currently 1:09am so if there are any spelling errors or errors in my quirk i am sorry.

#Anonymous #Mage of Void #Knight of Heart #mage class #knight class #void aspect #heart aspect #quadrant analysis #homestuck #(( that sprite edit took me so long simply because i could not for the life of me find a good gif maker ))

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poetic-beats · 4 years

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You'll be ok. If you feel your not, You can talk to me. Take care of yourself.

Thank you so much <3 I am just overwhelmed by everything right now. Like my partner having no job by January. My mental health. My physical health like this year so far I’ve been told I have CNS dysfunction and FGID. I am being tested for Celiac. Oh and they found cysts on my ovaries then they tested and said it wasn’t what it could’ve been and now because of issues I’ve had my female GP who handles my contraception which is due up in January wants me to have another uhh thing to check the cysts and have another blood test because turns out I could actually have it..and it could affect my chances to have children naturally - I know what it was like for my mum she has the same condition and so if i have it I’m scared even though things are different now they know more and have better options its still like D: It is like seriously though I’ve got two new things wrong with me although they havent yet like found the cause of the CNS dysfunction all the specialist could say is I hit some markers for Fibromyalgia but not enough but in her medical professional opinion I do have some form of CNS dysfunction but just not likely fibromyalgia my mum took me to see this specialist first purely because she has Fibro herself so she thought well lets start with an appointment with a rheumatologist who would like be able to check for fibro and a few other condtions. So I kinda need to like now see I think the next step is a neuropsychologist but like I’ve been so stressed and ill right now trying to fight for my mental health treatment/therapy so I’ve not been like exactly thinking about making appointments for the CNS stuff. But it is impacting me it makes me get involuntary like twitches/jerks it feels like a jolt like a little electric jolt i guess down my body but not painful as such but it just makes my body go like suddenly my arms jerked to the left or Ive thrown the food in my hand across the room because my arm/wrist/hand w/e has suddenly twitched or w/e but sometimes i get the like electric like w/e feeling its hard to explain it like across my whole body from my head to my toes and at that point it can lead to me just sort of on and off twitching a bit more like less aggressively but more often in a space of time i usually end up sleeping it off so idk really I pretty much just always pass out asleep when I get that kind of feeling. And like I wanna do stuff to like help ease his worries about money and the burden on him to support us financially and support me emotionally. But I’m not fit to work like not even a minor part time job really because I’d be so unreliable with the way my body is. I am also affected by sensory issues and other things so it’s just not I couldnt realistically right now engage in work for someone. So I am trying to do like online things but I don’t...I...just I am getting kinda overwhelmed by that too. Cos I dont know where to start what to do. Like I do but I dont you know? I mean...idk...Ive sold 3 pairs of sloth socks which was cool in the past like 2 weeks or is it 3 now since like i started like really seriously uploading to redbubble like before that I kept like uploading then removing my designs trying out different sites and so on I was trying to figure it out but I do now have it kinda figured out so that’s something. But now its like I’ve gotta get people to my freakin’ redbubble and its hard cos how an earth do i drive people to check out my store from the millions of others on the site. But also like I dont wanna like.. Idk I feel like and even though I have explained my situation on here I still kinda feel like I try to do it in a like not serious asking for help way in that i dont want it to come off as idk like I dont wanna be that person where its like i dont wanna be coming off as oh please help me feel sympathy towards me and feel sorry for me or pity me bs. I dont wanna be like appearing to be all I’m in desperate need pls help signal boost or buy to support me. Cos I’m not you know I have my parents to help we’ll be moving back in hopefully before xmas where I won’t have to pay rent. For me this is more about you know when my parents aren’t there I need to have an income for me and my partner hes disabled too...so full time jobs for the both of us is not likely especially if his EDS (edlher danlos syndrome) gets worse ya know? So I suppose my worries arent like of imminent threat of anything but more like in the future we’ll be fucked if i cant set down the foundations now for the potential for a long term income from various online strategies. But just even thinking about the future and that far ahead fucking terrifies me. Not only because of all this but because I never really thought about the future I didnt see one for myself as far as I was concerned I’d be dead or I’d be just...idk I couldnt even imagine a future or if I thought I’d make it I wouldnt really care you know because I didnt have like that light in me to want to live so it wasnt like I wanted to survive and thrive and i couldnt see a ‘happy ending’ for myself and now i can and I want to make that come true but of course its a bit hard to envisage a nice happy future with Kade when literally everything depends on having money to eat and have a roof over our heads etc and its just..UGH

I feel like trash too because I feel like my worth is valued by my output/labour and at the moment my output isn’t really bringing in cash right now so my output wouldnt exactly be deemed as ‘good’ idk its just weird its not like an I feel worthless thing like depression low self esteeem shit its more just a sort of social cultural consensus/belief that is ingrained that we are not really worth anything unless we’re contributing to society i.e working , paying taxes and buying things to reinvest in our economy etc etc..everything is about how much a human is worth in value of £ssss to big corporations and governments and rich people and idk its just like...they do have a point you know i cant just sit around and not do anything to contribute..because..then i feel like you know im not ‘sick enough’ to warrant that so im just in this limbo i guess completely self enforced by my mind which just makes it all the stupider but it is what it is. Venting this out has helped clear my mind some cos i mean at least its now out there in this void than just bouncing around my brain. Its why i write poetry too I guess idk why I just feel a release less tension SOMETIMES not all the time but sometimes it can help ease even if only slightly the chaos of my mind to just get it out there whether by chatting in person or writing it out like this just having it out there venting to someone or on a blog where people will read knowing like its not isolated within you still its relieving sometimes. So thanks for messaging me! I hope you are having a good day so far! Idk timezones or where u r so it could be early there for you maybe your day is just starting..who knows! Its 2:37pm where I am right now though so I need to work or try to...(yet again me feeling if i dont work constantly I be like failing at life) lol

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askthetotallynotcampcamp · 4 years

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I AM LOVING THE NERRIS X HARRISON CAN I HAVE A FULL STORY OF IT P L E A SE

Ava: of course!! We'll start writing it after we finish the one we're doing now:)

OKAY WE'RE WRITING IT NOW

Okay so it's the next summer and the first day on camp

---------

Nerris: *runs off the bus* HI DAVID!

David: why hello Nerris! Glad to see you here again! Everyone is in the mess all!

Nerris: alrighty thanks! *runs into the mess hall*

Harrison: *is straight up vibin*

Nerris: HARRISON!

Harrison: Hello Nerris!!

Nerris: *runs up to him and hugs him* HIIIII

Harrison: Hey!! *hug yummy* How was your year?

Nerris: oh it was great! I went to Harry Potter world with my parents and got so many wands and capes!

Harrison: That’s awesome!! I didn’t, uh do much with my parents.

Nerris: well um- I missed you!!

Harrison: i missed you too!!

Nerris: *sits next to him* so, did ya do anything for Christmas? *v happy*

Harrison: uhh not really-

Nerris: well you're always welcome to come over my house whenever ya want! *swinging her legs*

David: wow Gwen, harrison and nerris are getting along this year! Isnt that great?

Gwen: yeah, sure. they’re into eachother, though

David: I know you're into trash tv but dont go around shipping our campers!

Gwen: David how stupid are you? Can you not s e e

David: what? They're having a friendly conversation!

Gwen: David come ON- look at them!

David: they arent holding hands or kissing!

Gwen: Okay, well, here’s a shock, you don’t always have to do that to be in love

David: l-love? They're just kids!

Gwen: Oh come ON did you not have crushes as a kid?

David: well- we dont talk about that Gwen! They're probably just really good friends- I guess friends stare at the other person like they're in love- oh my gosh they are! Or at least Harrison is

Gwen: What do you me we don’t talk about that- see you agree with me now!

David: I think Harrison has a thing for her but nerris doesbt have a thing for him- she always ends up fighting with him

Gwen: David you have never been with a girl, have you? That’s how girls hide their FEELINGS

David: no I havent but that's not important! So she hides her feelings by telling him he sucks?

Gwen: ugh you make it sound like you like guys- yes david that is what i am trying to ge through your head

David: oooo I'm gonna make this be their best summer yet *walks up to them* hello guys! So I'm giving out rent information and you and Harrison will be sharing a tent this year! *walks back to Gwen* bam!

Gwen: oh sweet jesus- okay, i’m out this is out of my control now. peace *goes to councilorlrorleoldleldosrs cabin casually*

Nerris: oh yay! Let's go set up our beds! *runs outside to the tents*

Harrison: *S p e e d s to nerris*

Nerris: okay which side do you want buddy!

Harrison: Uh, the left?

Nerris: okay! *throws all her D&D blankets on the bed* ah home sweet home

Harrison: *vibes onto his bed*

Nerris: this may seem like a stupid question, but are ya still doing magic camp this year?

Harrison: Yeah, I haven’t been able to bring my brother back yet *a wkward laugh :”)*

Nerris: *hugs him* I know I'll probably end up yelling at you about something later but you can always talk about it whenever you want if you need to. I'm here

Harrison: Awww!! Thank you Nerris!!

Nerris: oh uh- you're welcome!

Harrison: *h u g*

Nerris: oh- *hugs him back bc shes nerris*

Harrison: *:))))*

Nerris: so, show me your newest trick! Unless you're addicted to hugs *giggles*

Harrison: Oh!! Ok!! *boop capowie flowers magic pew pew* Flowers for you, my lady

Nerris: *red* that was amazing! *claps*

Harrison: I know, right!

Nerris: Imma go get a vase from Gwen for the flowers! *runs to the cabin with the flowers* hey gwen, do have a vase by any chance?

Gwen: uhhh, there might be some in the kitchen. why?

Nerris: *shows her the flowers* Harrison did a new magic trick and gave me flowers!

Gwen: oh wow! that’s nice.

Nerris: yeah! *gets a vase from the kitchen and runs back to their tent* bam, vase

Harrison: Wow okay!! Do you have any new things to show me?

Nerris: yesyesyes!! I got new D&D dice!! *takes out the bag and puts them in her hands* it's even better because me and my dad made them!

Harrison: Oh wow!!! That’s super cool!!

Nerris: I also got a new wand but it was "too big" according to my mom so I couldn't being it *:(*

Harrison: Oh no, you can have one of mine if you want!

Nerris: oh my god really?! Thankyouthankyouthankyou- *hug*

Harrison: *hug :D*

Nerris: it's getting late...do we sleep or be rebels!

Harrison: let’s be rebels!

Nerris: ooooo Harrison the bad boy! *pats a spot next to her on her bed* I brought my tablet teehee

Harrison: *l e a p s onto Nerris’s bed* how rebellious!!

Nerris: you've never stayed up, have you?

Harrison: uhhh, no not really

-after they'd been watching videos for awhile-

Nerris: *rests her head on Harrisons shoulder*

Harrison: *has his arm around Nerris 😳😳*

Nerris: *yawns* I'm tired Harrison...

Harrison: go to sleep!

Nerris: but arent you gonna sleep in your bed? I dont wanna fall asleep on you *sleepy giggles??*

Harrison: you can fall asleep on me if you want *teehee giggle*

Nerris: *sleep*

Harrison: *😳😳* goodnight then- *kisses nerris’s head and goes to sleep ahahahaha*

-3 am-

Nerris: *wakes up* huh... oh- *v red*

Harrison: *sleeps shyly*

Nerris: *cuddles Harrison bc crush*

Harrison: *AWAKENS* huh- oh god-

Nerris: *pretends to be sleeping*

Harrison: uh, *speeds over to his bed and sleeps there bc 😳*

Nerris: *sleep*

Time: it is day kachow

Harrison: *sleep tiem*

Nerris: ugh Harrison wake up I'm boredddddd

Harrison: *SLEEPING*

Nerris: *jumps on him* WAKE UPPPP

Harrison: HUH *IFNSKSNSKSNSKSNSKSNS*

Nerris: oh goodmorning!

Harrison: Hi nerris-

Nerris: hi Harrison! *smiles at him*

Harrison: *:D*

Nerris: *pulls him up but now shes like sitting in his lap😳* so what do ya wanna do today?

Harrison: Uhh, we could see what the rest of the camp is doing? *😳😳*

Nerris: alrighty! *runs out of the tent* meet ya there!

Harrison: *😳😳😳* *speeds out*

-at lunch-

Nerris: *chilling with her food*

Harrison: *w a l k s over to nerris* Hi Nerris!

Nerris: oh hey Harrison!

Harrison: Could I uh, sit next to you?

Nerris: uh yeah I guess

Harrison: Thanks, *s i t* so, how are you?

Nerris: I'm good?

Harrison: cool cool cool *😳😳😳😳*

Nerris: why the hell are you so red? And sweaty? Sick people shouldnt be at camp and you look pretty sick to me *grossed out expression*

Harrison: Hey I’m not sick! You’re the sick one! *😳😳😡😡*

Nerris: Mhm, I dont think my face could even get as red as yours magic boy

Harrison: Oh really? I’ll make it go red with magic

Nerris: still wont be real. Your magic cant do anything against me, it's all silly old tricks *crosses her arms*

Harrison: Your “magic” is just rolling stupid dice and then yelling about it!

Nerris: *holding back tears and walks out of the hall*

Harrison: oh shoot- *regrets all his life choices*

Nerris: *sitting in the tent talking to herself while holding the dice* hes right, you're just stupid dice! You dont do anything! You're worthless! You dont make anything better! You suck nerris! I hate you!- *breaks down*

Harrison: *sp e eds to the tent* Nerris- nerris i’m so so so sorry i honestly didn’t mean it i was just confused and i feel bad and i’m so sorry-

Nerris: no it's fine. You're right. My "magic" isnt even magic, its stupid! They're just a game board a dice! *takes off her hat and cape* it's stupid.

Harrison: nerris- come on, please- it isn’t stupid! it’s really really cool!!

Nerris: that's not what you said a couple minutes ago, is it Harrison?! You called it stupid! If it's really really cool, why didnt you say that? And you werent confused, we've been fighting since the day we met, and you know that.

Harrison: Nerris come on, i really didn’t mean it. If we’re using that logic, then my magic is stupid too. *throws his h a t on the FLOOR* now we both feel stupid, how about that?

Nerris: i-..*hugs him sobbing*

Harrison: hey, uh, it’s okay, don’t cry- *hugs nerris sadly and shyly 👉👈*

Nerris: i- I'm s-sorry * still crying😳*

Harrison: I’m the one who should be sorry, I took it too far. It’s okay, don’t worry about it *pat pat*

Nerris: thank you Harrison *smiles at him and kisses him on the cheek*

Harrison: *😳😳😳😳😳* uhhh, yeah, no p-problem

Nerris: damn you blush easily *giggles*

Harrison: you make it easy to *😳😳*

Nerris: *😳* shut up

Harrison: ha, whos blushing easily now? *picks up nerris’s c a p and c a p e* i believe these belong to you, my lady?

Nerris: *picks up his hat and puts it on his head* there you go my good sir

Harrison: I’m sorry about what i said earlier, that was too much

Nerris: *holds his hands* it's okay Harrison

Harrison: *blushes shyly and cutely* yeah, i guess

Nerris: I'm serious. It's okay. And I'm sorry too, I swear I didnt mean anything. I have to make it up to you- I'll do anything *smiles at him*

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mentalmimosa · 5 years

Text

long night in the castle of lions

Sometimes, the nights in the castle are long. Long and filled with a sort of infinite quiet, the sound of universe at rest that presses in from all sides. No noise from inside the ship can compete with it, that silence, not Lance’s snores or the singsong Hunk uses to talk himself into sleep: It’s ok. It’s all right. Everything is gonna be fine.

It isn’t. Keith’s pretty sure of that. Lions or legendary whatever notwithstanding, it feels like they’re pretty much screwed.

Galactic evil? Weapons that can blow away worlds? What kind of chance do they have against any of that?

Not good. Not fucking good.

He can hide those thoughts during the day, when they’re out and about saving the innocent and protecting what’s good, what seems right. But at night, when he has only the shadows and his own head for company, those thoughts drown him out, pull him knee deep into despair.

He doesn’t sleep much in the castle. He envies everybody who can: Pidge, who can curl into any corner and be asleep in ten ticks. Allura and Coran, who slept here for 10,000 years, for gods’ sake. And Shiro, their great and glorious leader, who strolls into the lounge for breakfast every morning looking like he’s just had a strong, solid eight.

“Good morning,” he’ll say to each of them, a smile and a pat on the shoulder for each. “How’d you sleep?”

Keith doesn’t bother to lie anymore, to put on an act of at ease and well-rested.

“Like shit, Shiro,” he’ll say, not bothering to raise his head from the purple stuff that passes for coffee. “Like absolute shit.”

The first time he’d said it, Shiro had startled, his hold on Keith’s shoulder going sudden and tight.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Didn’t get a wink.”

“Well,” Shiro had stumbled, “you, ah--did you try meditation?”

“Didn’t bother.” He’d looked up, looked back to see Shiro’s face drawn up and worried. “I never sleep a lot anyway. Even on Earth. I’m fine.”

Shiro hadn’t bought it then, didn’t buy it now, but Keith’s stuck to it, this little shade of untruth. No, he’s never taken refuge in sleep like some people but he’s never found it so elusive before, so willing to slip out of his grasp. After a while, he even finds himself missing his nightmares: the ones about crashing, the ones about falling, the ones about his mom’s voice. They feel like old friends, those dreams, that he’s no longer allowed to see.

And he’s tired. Dear gods, he’s exhausted. But even the softest Altean pillow and the pressure of darkness can’t kick him over to sleep, not the kind he needs, the kind that lets him sink into the bed and lasts for more than 20 minutes. That sort of sleep, it feels like, is long fucking gone.

*****

One night, or what passes for it in space, there’s a knock on his door.

That’s how he knows it isn’t Coran or Allura; they’d have gone straight for the chime. It’s not Hunk, either, because he favors shave and a haircut , and it’s not Lance because he’s a dick and would’ve pounded with both fists. And shouted. He’d definitely have shouted.

Pidge or Shiro, then.

And unless Pidge’s shot up a foot in the last few hours, the tapping is too tall for him. So.

“It’s alright, Shiro,” he calls, waving on the small bunkside lamp. “You can come in.”

The door slides open and Shiro steps in, frowning. “How’d you know it was me?”

“Lucky guess.”

“Right.”

It takes Keith a second to realize that Shiro looks weird. Well, not weird, but a lot less formal than usual; less like a Garrison Leader and more like a person. A person who’s wearing--

“Are those pajamas ?”

Shiro looks down at himself, looks back up at Keith, bemused. “To the best of my knowledge, yes. They’re not a matched set, but since it’s what I tend to sleep in, I think calling them pajamas is fair.”

“Oh. Sure.”

“I mean, if anyone’s attire is cause for comment, I think it’s yours. Aren’t those the clothes you wore today? And yesterday? And the day before that?”

“I put them through the ‘fresher every morning,” Keith says, defensive. “It’s not like I’m wandering around unwashed or something.”

“No, it’s”--Shiro holds his hands up, a little sign of surrender--“I wasn’t suggesting you were. Do you...is this what you wear every night?”

Keith bristles. “Yes. So?”

“So, maybe you’d have an easier time sleeping if you, you know, let yourself relax.”

“I am relaxed!”

Shiro’s mouth curves. “Yeah, obviously. Look at you. You’re the picture of rest and relaxation, Keith.”

Gods, what is it with this guy? “What are you doing here?”

“I’m worried about you.”

“Ugh.” Keith folds his arms across his chest, summons his best scowl. “You don’t need to be.”

“You haven’t slept in weeks. And that’s according to you. You don’t see a cause for concern?”

“I told you. I’m fine.”

Shiro steps towards the bunk, the lamp catching his face, the dark light of his eyes. “And I’m here as your friend to tell you you’re not. What happened with you and the Green Lion today?”

There’s a rush of heat in his face. “We--I lost track of it for a minute, that’s all.”

“And nearly crashed into its side. You could’ve been hurt. So could Pidge, along with both of your lions.”

“But I didn’t. Everything turned out fine. We got home in one piece, didn’t we?”

Shiro’s voice is terribly gentle. “Keith.”

“What?”

“That was just today. Last week, you almost went headfirst into that asteroid. And right before that, you--”

“Gods, shut up!” Keith says. There are tears in his eyes, tears, in front of freaking Shiro. It’s fucking horrific. “You don’t have to--I know I’ve screwed up, ok? I know each and every time I’ve made a mistake.”

“Keith--”

“I know I’m a fuck-up, alright? I know that, I know, you don’t have to come in here in the middle of the fucking night to remind me!”

“Hey,” Shiro says, a shot of steel in his voice, “no way. That’s not why I’m here.”

“Really? Really? Right. Sure, Shiro.”

“Damn it, don’t--!”

He shoves the tears from his cheeks and flies up, ready to punch Shiro if he has to, shove him out into the corridor, anything to make him go away. “Stop talking!” he barks. “Just shut up and get out of here!”

“No!” Shiro shouts, getting right in his face. “I’ve tried not talking to you about this, and you know what, that didn’t work! You’re still dead on your feet all the time, you still look sick, you still feel like you’re worthless and you think that you’re holding us back but you’re not, Keith! You’re not!”

Keith bares his teeth, balls his fists. “How the fuck do you know how I feel, huh?”

“How do I--?” Shiro looks furious. “What part of there are no secrets between paladins did you not understand?”

“What?”

“The mind-link,” Shiro says through gritted teeth. “When we’re Voltron. Do you not grok how it works?”

Keith snarls, tries to take a step back, but Shiro has him by the elbows like a vise. “You’ve been digging around in my head, then? That’s great. That’s real fucking leader-ly of you.”

“I’m not--I’m not digging around in your head! You’re broadcasting those feelings like they’re on a freaking repeater!”

“No, I’m not.”

“You are.” Shiro’s eyes are angry, his grip unrelenting. “Gods, don’t you see? The more tired you get, the louder your thoughts are. Your brain doesn’t have the energy to hold them back.”

There’s a sink of fear in Keith’s gut. He’s afraid it shows in his face; raises his voice just in case. “Well,” he spits, “that doesn’t mean you have to listen!”

“You’re impossible!” Shiro says through clentched teeth. “Honestly, gods, Keith, you’re the most--!”

There are a lot of things that rattle around in Keith’s head on those long nights in the Castle of Lions. Some nights, he can’t crawl out of sadness, can’t shake himself free of worry and doubt. Some nights, there’s fear: the shriek of Zarkon’s fighters; the screams of dying planets; the way the Red Lion trembles when he’s wounded.

But on some nights, when the silence is at its most still, Keith thinks about Shiro. Not the man who strides about with so much certainty, the man who never loses his cool, the man whose resolution, whose steadiness has held their shaky team together time and strange time again.

No, he thinks about the man he’d seen on the table on Earth, the man whose shackles he’d broken, the man who he’d half-carried, half-dragged into the open air, to the speeder, to safety. He remembers the weight of Shiro’s head on his shoulder and the stutter of his breath, the way he’d clung to Keith without reservation or shame, the soft grateful sounds he’d made against Keith’s neck as they staggered towards safety and away from chains and from fear:

Thank you, he’d murmured, his voice like a bruise. Whoever you are. Thank you.

And those thoughts slip sometimes into a dream, an imagined hour in his bed with Shiro bent over him, kissing him, petting at his skin until he cries out and making those same grateful sounds as he pushes into Keith’s body, fills him until there’s no room for thinking, no room for worry, no worry for something like doubt.

Keith, this dream-Shiro will murmur, his voice like a bruise. Thank you. Thank you.

On those longest of nights, the sweetest, he’ll take himself in hand and forget to muffle his cries. He’ll imagine the shape of Shiro’s mouth, the taste of its weight upon his, and stroke himself as Shiro would, slow and steady, each touch perfect and measured until it’s not, until they can’t be, until they’re fucking in earnest and all words are gone and there is, in the whole goddamn universe, only the two of them left, spend supernovas panting against each other’s hot skin.

And then, with the dream pulled about him, he’ll sleep, fall into a soft solid hour of respite but then awake feeling guilty, so fucking guilty, his flesh crawling in shame, and his eyes never close again after that.

Has he put that out into the mind-link? Those feelings, that momentary delusion. Does Shiro know about all of that, too?

“Fuck,” he says, frantic, twisting in Shiro’s arms, “do you ever shut up?”

“I don’t know. Do you ever listen?”

His heart is on fire, his whole body filled with panic. “Huh,” he spits, “maybe if you said something worth hearing.”

Shiro opens his mouth--to scold, to fuss, to shout, maybe all of the above--but in the same instant, their bodies collide, Keith’s thrashing crashing their hips together in a sweet sudden collision and oh, Keith thinks wild, disbelieving, oh gods, because Shiro is hard, stiff behind the soft turn of his sleep pants and he’s breathing startled into Keith’s face and not running away and this is a terrible idea, this isn’t even a thought, this is the best thing that Keith’s done all day:

He turns his face and jams his mouth against Shiro’s, less a kiss than a battering ram. It’s awkward and sideways and rushed and yet it makes Shiro moan, makes his hands fly up to cup Keith’s face and steady him, steady them, turn the awkward into something perfect and deep.

He tastes like Altean toothpaste, does Shiro, a dark, bitter berry. His tongue is demanding and his body unyielding and his fingers are cold, metal and skin both, and with all this, with just a kiss, he makes Keith see fucking stars.

“I didn’t come here for this,” Shiro whispers when they part, when their lips drift just enough to let words fly. “I mean, I’d be lying if I said I’d never thought about, um...but honestly, I came to see if you were all right.”

Keith slips his hand under the hem of Shiro’s t-shirt, lays his palm over cool, shivering skin. “Mmm, I know. But does that mean you want to stop?”

Shiro makes a tiny, pained sound, his cock twitching against Keith’s hip. “Stop? No. No no. Unless you--unless you want to.”

“No,” Keith says, biting gently at Shiro’s lip, his own curled up in a smile. “Definitely not.”

*****

In the morning, he’s slumped over his weird not-coffee when he feels a hand on his shoulder, a roughened voice saying: “Keith? How’d you sleep?”

He tips his head back and smiles. “Like a baby, actually. Once I got around to it. How about you?"

Shiro’s eyes are warm, his mouth still flushed. “About the same, actually.”

“Really? Huh. That’s funny.”

“It is, isn’t it?” Shiro touches the bruise he left on Keith’s neck, the only one the collar of his jacket can’t hide, and gives up a tired grin. “What a coincidence.”

The whole team is looking at them, aren’t they, and Lance is howling something tinged with disbelief but it’s fine, Keith isn’t worried about it; he’s not worried about a damn thing. For the moment, it’s the castle that’s bustling, brimming over with noise and ideas and life, while Keith’s head is quiet and settled, the joy of the night before pressing in on all sides.

“Good morning,” Shiro says, giving him one last squeeze, another lazy shot of a smile.

“Yeah,” Keith says to himself, to his last sip of coffee, to the goggled eyes of his teammates. “It is.”

#shiro #first kiss #season one

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cielospeaks · 3 years

Text

re: the drama abt f g o event

first off, honestly i dont rlly like the new designs. the new npcs are... ok. but like. i felt more potential from literally any other npc in the series, and i felt like they meshed better w the world they were in. katsu has a strong relationship w his sister and than gosh he got out of npc heck, shibata is chacha’s father and their relationship was rlly sweet/touching, maxwell is in the hecking original story, akechi has a cool design and is really integral to the nobunaga story. even the two new shinsengumi characters from last year were awesome and helped flesh out their story a lot more.

meanwhile i dont rlly feel inspired by any of the new npcs. theyre... ok? but they dont rlly click somehow. like. idk. they feel more like the creator wanted to make a “pretty clamp boy” or a “evil ceo” or a “big muscle boy” and not like they were actually making the characters. but then again apparently the whole event is like a final fantasy reference for literally no reason so it adds up to f g o bullshit referential ‘humor’

i also. idk. the event isnt over but im not into the new ryoma at all. he has that air of “smug evil pretty boy sexyman” that the game pushes a lot (douman, bad character, kirei, ect) and to make matters worse is kinda overwriting a neat character (that being ryoma) who doesnt have that personality at all. i am glad that ryoma does interact w him, and stands up for his friends, ect. (unlike marie, bc i dont think itd fit ryomas personality to just let his doppelganger abuse his loved ones just bc theyre pretty or something like that). idk if looks were it id stop there but he also is cruel to oryo, calling her a monster and basically just using her, and who knows what he says to ryoma/izou/ect. i dont trust or like him and honestly he can stay in npc heck far away from oryou after what he did.

im also just tired of the woman hating fans singling out izumi just because their lazy pretty boy designs arent playable. listen, if ur gonna blame anyone blame the teams obsession w voice actors/big names, as the kabuki robot is voiced by one of the main special guests, and that alone was probably a big factor in her being playable/5 star. izumi is a character ive wanted to see in the game for a very long time, and her design isnt blatant “sexy” the way tons of characters from the beloved lb6 were, or just a burning trash heap like lb5.2 and 5.5 were. shes a fun and interesting character yall just are sexist pieces of shit.

and more regarding characters. the “ranmaru is chuuni” thing would be fine, but please leave the mhx verse out of this. not only did your bad star wars parody kill halloween for 2 years, its also not funny and is just the laziest non committal excuse to pull together more “op” characters. also. yall are throwing a tantrum over some generic pretty boys not being added yet somehow stuff like saber wars/lb/ect is fine that it doesnt introduce guys/many guys? something seems a bit unbalanced. fucking bastar piece of shit scumbag worthless trash heaps i hate you all

#negative #i think its a trend tbh.#like 3 was eh. 4 was at least half not my thing.#5 was wonderful and amazing. 6 is half not my thing.#i just hope next yr there isnt an event so when we have 7 itll actually have its own time. and maybe add maxwell or shibata or someone nice

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niamh222 · 3 years

Text

Being a woman, a bad person and my mother Daria.

First, I want to start with being a woman. This has been something on my mind since childhood- and being raised by feminist parents made me acutely aware of women's oppression at perhaps too young an age.

After watching a film with my family, my dad described to me first as having a woman director. "Its one of you making it, wont you be happy with this representation, women can be successful you know, they can do anything a normal person- i mean a man can do." So this film by a woman director is shit; it's whatever. What frustrates me more is that- in my time in my life, I have met and known of so many incredible women, women I look up to, women that are badass as fuck while still being women. I know these people, yet there are hardly any women like this in film or media that arent some feminist Mary Sue who does no wrong. A perfect woman with a full face toned abbs and a fresh blowout, lip fillers, and a juice-only diet. Constantly breathless and fighting the patriarchy. That's what's supposed to make me feel good?! That's what's supposed to make me think, "i can be the ideal woman, the archetype, the madonna and the whore and i can do all that and be a feminist- i can be a patriarchal woman without being oppressed" no, no you can't. It's selling a lie. So that's what I have to sit through whenever my dad introduces a feminist movie- they all feel pandering, pathetic shit to sell me the idea that I need to look like a porn star to get anywhere. I look like a human, I look like a man-

A man with pores, a man with cracked lips and dull, flat hair. I naturally look like a man with hairy fucking legs and his rough dirty unwashed disgusting skin. Naturally, a woman will have the same scars, ugliness, BO and fat, ununiform bodies. Women are natural and normal. But these films attempting to show feminist women have them playing "women" and not people.

That's my first thought and linked to it in many ways are my thoughts on gender. I have long hair and tits, and I do skincare and put on makeup and get piercings. Granted, I don't shave, but let's be honest, that's more lazy punk shit rather than any sort of feminist statement. Not shaving is me being comfortable with the fact that anyone sees my hairy legs, armpits, and pussy won't give two fucks. Regardless of the hair- I'm a woman, and I look like one; I keep my maintenance up to date. I mean fuck, I used to shave my peach fuzz, for fucks sake. In many ways, I feel like keeping up this doll vibe, this "woman," is easier because if I am objectified and seen as helpless… I get more help- in many ways, for my life, being a woman puts me at an advantage. I can be helpless, and people aren't gonna hold me up on it as if I was a man- because I'm just a dumb bimbo who can get shit wrong. And I like that it reduces conflict; it makes shit easier when people think you're a dumb blonde. I can't be sure that I'd be happier without this oppression, without this need for physical maintenance, without the threat of aging or weight gain looming over me. And some things make me think- some things about penis envy, facial hair, and growing my hair long to look like a man rather than a woman- there are some things like having boobs and hips and being short that I don't like to think about too much. Because it fits, the bimbo fairy bitch works for me- I mean, I'm a libra moon. I can't help think somedays, what would it be like if I was born a man, I certainly wouldn't be into a lot of the stuff I'm into. Sometimes I even think my interest in psychology is to do with my need to feel like a nurturing carer woman.

Additionally, my attraction to men has been on my mind. I feel like I accepted that I was probably into women too early in an attempt to push away that conversation. "Yes okay, you like women now shut up and move on and dont look to deeply." My attraction to women feels safe and happy and calm- and I think I don't want that because I'm scared of nice things.

I'm scared of meeting cool people.

I'm scared of cool kids and cool spaces

I'm scared of being in a queer relationship

I'm scared of things that would make me happy in case I fuck them up.

And I feel like my attraction to men acts as some form of sick punishment to keep me from self-actualization, which keeps me dependent on male approval and the male gaze. Because without the male gaze, what am I? Fairy bimbo bitches don't exist without men to see me like that.

So what is that, that fear of fucking up? Is that insecurity? A feeling that I cant have good things because they will end? Or be ruined? And that it'll be my fault? I don't feel like I'm a bad person, but I think deep down I do- I just don't tell myself I'm bad- but I do think ill fuck everything up, and it'll go wrong, and that good things won't happen to me… is that basically thinking I'm bad?

Regardless, I have been thinking about my mother. Her trauma. She has been bullied her entire life by her family, friends, colleagues, and husband. She's smart, but she doesn't trust herself and her self-esteem is so low that she sees the world through shit-tinted spectacles. "You did that purposfuly to hurt my feelings," "this is bad because im bad and i fucked up," "everyone hates me and is out to get me," "my husband will leave me and i get scared of him talking to other women" "i need to watch what i eat because if im fat im even more worthless." That insecurity has infected me like a poison, and it dictates my core beliefs about the world. So now, I see the world through shit-tinted spectacles, and that is what gives me anxiety.

Insecure people need something to blame, traumatized people need an outlet, and I was that outlet because it was easy. So all that hate, that contempt for those who had wronged her, that was on me. That was on me because I am the baby that almost killed her and almost died. I am the baby she had out of some kind of obligation to a "kiwiana dream" two kids and a house; I mean fuck, we almost got a dog and a pool if they weren't so frugal. My mum is like Daria.

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kai-wanted-doa · 3 years

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Listening to liability by lorde cos I love Olivia rodrigo & she said she liked this song & can I say??? If I wouldve listened to this song 5-10 years ago I would've probably cried & felt really shitty. I wouldve also strongly felt that I am a liability to the friends who are around me or that I'm boring, I'm annoying, or maybe they are people who just tolerate me, or maybe they think about leaving me.

But here I GO AGAIN WITH ME TALKING ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND. Listening to this song made me realize that during my time dating him, feeling as if I am a liability is not a concern. I don't get the feeling that my "quirks" are unbearable to this boy who spends time with me. I don't feel worthless or that I am a liability. This is huge, and it makes me happy to know that I don't have those old feelings of thinking nobody really wants me or that nobody enjoys my company. Cos I always had fears that my "friends" didn't care much for me or that I bothered them.

I'm sure many young adults at that age can say they have gone thru something similar. Idk why that happens. Maybe it's bcos the "lighthearted jokes/teasing" arent so lighthearted after all. For example, a friend saying "thats not even funny" or "okay....that was awkward" & going silent after u thought you said something funny/charming. Being shrugged off. Being left behind. Not being considered or having your feelings validated. Maybe these moments can make a person feel like a liability around their friends. Some may say -well if they treat u like that then maybe they aren't really a good friend-, which is something I could agree with. But at the same time I try to be accepting that not everybody is 100% decent with their words, and that's ok I just have to acknowledge this fact. (Then this leads me personally to build up a wall around myself to protect me from getting hurt by a friend who I "let in". Feelings of isolation start to set in. Worries. Self-doubt. Blahblahblah)

Besides getting hurt in these ways, I think another thing that leads people to believe they're a liability is the lack of communication of true feelings that goes on between friends. Lack of communicating things like "what you said hurt me...please don't say that again" and even the lack of saying things like "hey I appreciated what you did for me today. That was pretty cool and I'll remember that. It made me feel better. Your presence in my life is very important to me." Having these conversations can be soooo excruciating...but I'm telling u...if the friend is willing to work with u, that's a good friend right there.

Anyway, to put a weird end on this post: here is a screenshot of a message my bf sent to me last night. Although I know I have my flaws and areas that I need to improve on and tons of growing up to do....I don't feel like a "liability" & I don't hate myself in this relationship. I may have moments where I feel like I'm acting like a crazy girlfriend & I hate that I act like that lmfaooo but it's not like I feel as if I'm worthless. I'm extra grateful for this friend of mine. He said I'm a dish best served raw...hahahahaha. to me, I hear this and believe he is willing to accept me as I am......thats a lovely feeling

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askjennie · 6 years

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Part 1: Hi, im 21 and have written to you a few times for variations of the same kind of issue. I’ve never had a boyfriend, and for my whole life have only had crushes on guys I thought were out of my league, constantly chasing guys that clearly don’t like me or value me. I’d get the guy, always did, but for only a short amount of time, maybe a couple dates or 1 or 2 hangouts and that’s always been it. After every time it leaves me feeling worthless and then I beat myself up over feeling that

Continued: Part 2:I’m being dramatic. I know this all sounds silly but I do get anxiety over certain things and I’ve come to realize area of my life brings the most anxiety, and can really take over my mind, I really don’t handle rejection and I take it extremely personally. Last month I was told by a guy I was talking to that “the spark between us is gone” while we were hooking up, and he said we can just be friends, and let me walk out of his life and never contacted me again (though, I said not to)Part 3:after months of leading me on. It hurt so bad and since this is all I’ve ever known, I’m starting to think there’s something wrong with me. It’s crazy to think I have social anxiety as I value the opinions of others (especially guys I think are too good for me or don’t like me) because im a pretty social person and have a lot of close friends. Before this guy, there was another guy who id chase and didn’t stop persuing him until I starting seeing the other. And before that one, I was hurtPart 4:over being ghosted by my biggest crush, for a year.. I let it bother me for one whole YEAR. A year of posting snapchats and wanting him to see it, wanting him to like my photos, wanting to bump into him, etc. this sounds so silly as I’m typing it and I know it is all so ridiciulous. After these rejections I sit and analyze every little thing I’ve said or could have done differently, even analyzing my body at different angles and little stuff like that. I used to think feeling this hurtPart 5:was part of life, as people come and go, , and I really thought these were some type of heartbreak but now I’m realizing its coming from a place of low confidence, cause its not like I “miss” these guys I was never really close with them.. its how they made me feel that hurts.. I don’t have any self love… I’m tired of feeling not good enough, that I don’t deserve or wont get what I want in life like getting married or being at peace. I don’t know if this is a phase and I know there arePart 6: good days. But im tired of attracting people who don’t care about me. Its crazy because I logically know all of these guys arent anything special to me, I know deep down I didn’t genuinely click with them, so why am I so crushed when they reject me? And im not lonely, I don’t need a boyfriend in my life, I have a lot of family and friends and other things going for me.. I just don’t think I can handle all this negative self talk and all these negative beliefs about relationships,Part 7:, it really affects my day to day. It seems as though everyone is able to find someone that wants them and I’m just either wanted for sex or the guy gets to know me and realizes I’m not worth dating. It makes me feel so low. I know im a good person and my close friends and family all come to me for advice and support. I know I have things to offer and it just really crushes me when someone cant see my worth, it makes me so anxious. Another issue is that these guys whose opinions I care abPart 8:Another issue is that these guys whose opinions I care about are always guys who I think are out of my league, are popular, good looking, cool and im just setting myself up to feel inferior. Im the first to reject a nice guy who isnt very attractive to me, and ive been told im extremely picky and been told I was superficial as well. I feel like a bad person. Why cant I look for a boyfriend in the same way I look for a friend? Someone who makes me feel good, someone I connect with, someonepart 9: someone I connect with, someone who values me? I have such amazing friends and family but horrible taste in men. I just want someone I both connect with AND who I think highly of? What would you do if you were me? A year ago I did therapy for 3 or 4 sessions and I don’t know if it was the therapist I didn’t click with, but I stopped bc I thought I was wasting money. Sometimes I think I need help, other times I think time will pass and ill get over the rejection. But I think the problempart 10:is deeper as I feel way too harshly affected by whats going on. 2018 has been horrible and each day is filled with HOURS of worrying. I feel like all I do is worry. Even before that rejection last month, while we were still talking, I just felt like shit the whole time and didn’t feel worthy, felt like I had to compete for his attention constantly, and I found it hard to be myself. Its funny because in the beginning when he was chasing me,I wasn’t sure if I liked him. It was when hepart 11: [not sure where I left off]…2018 has been horrible and each day is filled with HOURS of worrying. I feel like all I do is worry. Even before that rejection last month, while we were still talking, I just felt like shit the whole time and didn’t feel worthy, felt like I had to compete for his attention constantly, and I found it hard to be myself. Its funny because in the beginning when he was chasing me, I wasn’t sure if I liked him. It was when he started noticeably talking to andpart 12:and taking out other girls that I felt crushed and felt the need to prove myself. And this has happened all of high school and with every guy ive talked to. I feel like im not enoguh and I have to do soemthing for someone to like me, instead of just being myself. Will this get better? Will I ever be confident? I feel like my insecurities are so strong that im driving away a lot of guys, and I feel like as I get older im just getting more anxious about this whole idea because most peoplepart 13:because most people have been with someone before. I’m sorry if this sounds ridiculous or stupid, and you can say if these fears are dramatic or irrational. Maybe its because I feel that I have most of what I need in life (family, friends, money, health) and this is just an unknown area and therefore brings me a lot of anxiety. Any advice would help, this felt good to write down so thanks for reading all of this.

Jennie: After answering this ask and this ask, I don’t think I have much more advice to give. Your fears ARE dramatic and irrational, but so are the fears of anyone who has some kind of anxiety disorder, and it’s not helpful or realistic to tell yourself or anyone else to just ‘stop being irrational’. If you’re worrying for hours every day, then I think it’s important that you seek professional help for your anxiety. Talk to your doctor, or contact mental health services, charities or therapists in your area.

I think you should give therapy another try. The therapist you had before might not have been a good fit for you, or maybe the type of therapy you were receiving wasn’t a good fit for you, or maybe you had unrealistic expectations of how therapy would help you (3-4 sessions should be enough to feel like it’s helpful, but 3-4 sessions is not going to completely solve your problems or ‘cure’ you - therapy can be a long and difficult process, and requires work on your part as well). It might take a few tries before you find a therapist who suits you, but I think it’s important to keep trying. This is your health, and your life, after all, and it’s important to learn to manage your anxiety so that you can keep living your life without constant worry.

#advice #ask me anything #anxiety #single #self esteem #relationships #mental health #advice blog #advice column #askjennie

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comicteaparty · 5 years

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February 4th-February 10th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from February 4th, 2019 to February 10th, 2019. The chat focused on Offshore Comic by Stefan Gasic.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Offshore Comic by Stefan Gasic~! (http://www.offshorecomic.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PST), so keep checking back for more! You have until February 10th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite strip in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 3. Given the comic’s focus on financial markets and all that composes them, what is something this comic has taught you about the subject? Alternatively, what is something you wished you understood better to understand the comic’s comedy?

QUESTION 4. How do you think the comic’s illustrative style and choices help the comedy of the comic? What is one moment where a particular design or image really stood out to you and helped the point the strip was trying to convey?

QUESTION 5. The comic features several recurring subjects like the legitimacy of IQ scores, LLCs, and more. Which of these recurring topics did you like the most? What about it caught your interest?

Stefan G

Hello everyone, 1) Just updated www.offshorecomic.com with a new strip. Check it out. 2) RebelVampire, are your questions intended for me or any new reader? Ciao, Stefan the creator of #Offshorecomic

snuffysam

They're intended for both (still working through the archive)!

keii4ii

Is there a way to get permalinks for individual strips, so I can come back to specific ones at a later time?

Stefan G

Thanks & okay, snuffysam keii4ii, unfortunately there’s no way to get permalinks for individual strips ... I coded the website myself as a side project and am not that good a coder

keii4ii

Oh man, I can relate to that... If I ever get rich, comic website coding and maintenance stuff is the first thing I'll hire someone to do for me

I do like how it loads and makes it easy to read through the archive, for what it's worth.

Stefan G

Thanks for the feedback ... and I totally, totally agree. One could spend a fortune for a coder to take care of all the fixings and stuff ... now I’m learning on the side whenever there’s time left over from work & family.

Stefan G

Answer to Q1 => readers have found the “happiness” strip the best. It’s also one of my favourite ones [succinct & clever & relatable] ...I truly don’t have a favourite strip, but the attached Reto & Urs -strips make me chuckle whenever I read them [I appreciate below-the-waist-humour and/or humour where people are really, really selfish].

lomcia (princess_lom)

1. The newest one is so funny

2. Trader

3. i dont work in office but i cant find nothing to improve that comic, i think the design of characters and humor is on really high lvl 12/10 for me

4. Style is perfect ffor that comic, i wouldnt change it

Stefan G

Answer to Q2 => at the moment my favourite character is the Economist. He’s a genuine IYI [intellectual-yet-idiot] ... which the world is full of and the finance industry in particular. The Economist is easy to write for because I’ve discovered a never ending source of humorous material called the daily financial newspaper ... please find attached also one of my favourite strips

Thank you, lomcia (princess_lom) for your feedback.

lomcia (princess_lom)

your welcome I hope i didnt misunderstood question 3 xD

Stefan G

I think you got everything just right

lomcia (princess_lom)

cool

Stefan G

Answer/comment to Q3 => I’ve spend my professional life in finance, hence, I know every nuance of the industry. However, for the layperson the finance industry [money, banking, insurance, etcetc...] is a big black box of unnecessary complication. My humble attempt with #Offshorecomic is to untangle this complexity and make money related topics more accessible/understandable to anyone ... using humour as my main tool. Finance is more stupid than you think; trust me

I’ll answer the rest tomorrow. Gotta go to now. is like in a totally different time zone and all that Thx again y’all !

RebelVampire

QUESTION 6. Which joke not related to finance did you enjoy the most? What about it made it stand out to you among all the others?

RebelVampire

1) i really enjoyed the life coaching strip about facing reality and lying to yourself. i just really enjoy the bluntness and simplicity by which the self-deception line is delivered. A+ comedy right. 2) i like p-bird because i consider him a much needed counter balance to many of the other characters. he at least has more feet planted in reality. 3) hedge funds. not that i understand them perfectly from the comic, but now theyre more than just a financial word i see tossed around. and despite the very negative absurdist humor regarding them, was still interesting to get some insight into what they actually involved. 4) i think the style overall really balances well with the comedy. a lot of the comedy is reliant on the dialogue, so keeping the illustrations clean, bold, and somewhat simple really helps direct attention to the words. i also really just enjoy the character designs cause every single one really hits that idiot or absurdist mark that needs to be hit. 5) actually i really liked the address of IQ scores. because literally these characters seem like the type whod wind up on r/iamverysmart and use their IQs to talk about how cool they are. so it was kind of nice to see some evidence for that with the subject. that and i always like seeing the concept of IQ being torn apart. 6) i actually liked a lot of the jokes that pertained to the academic sphere in regards to things like publishing and teaching. selfishly it most just stood out to me because academia is something im more familiar with in regards to its simultaneous setup of worthless class structures and cutthroat profs trying to further their careers.

Stefan G

Thank you, RebelVampire, for your thoughtful analysis & feedback I believe that the writing is the most important part in comics ... and the best humorous writing is often blunt & simple [you hit the nail on the head with that comment]. Furthermore, I intentionally designed the strip in a simplistic style in order to A) highlight the writing/gag, B) to save time and C) cuz simple drawings are funny I love to make fun of pompous, self righteous folks ... academics are thus some of my main targets [due to the same reasons I make fun of financial professionals].

Stefan G

Answer to Q4 => My childhood inspiration and spark for cartoons/drawing came from F.Ibanez [Clever & Smart] ... very funny yet simple style. Nowadays I enjoy Dilbert by Scott Adams or the political cartoons from cartoonist Jari Elsilä; also both of them are hilarious without wasting unnecessary lines. I believe a straightforward style highlights the writing and that’s what I’m trying to achieve. Moreover, I love to have backgrounds in my comics [to steer the reader to a particular thought or mood] but hate to draw them and/or dislike it when they clutter the cartoon ... I’m rather happy with a style that I’ve developed over time where I draw the background but reduce the opacity to 25 %. I think that works pretty nice

Stefan G

Answer to Q5 => My favourite themes are 1) anyone predicting the future, 2) mistaking luck for awesome skill and 3) incompetent yet pompous professionals ... there is so much hilarious material right there

Answer to Q6 => I often use the characters Reto und Urs for jokes/strips that are not necessarily financial because they are so endearingly stupid [well, mostly Urs is]. This one makes me chuckle

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. In what ways have any of the strips changed the way you think about life, finances, or any other topic covered in them? Alternatively, what have the strips portrayed that you wish more people knew?

RebelVampire

(the archive for the chat on Poco Adventures is now available https://comicteaparty.com/post/182650076295/january-28th-february-3rd-2019-ctp-archive)

RebelVampire

QUESTION 8. Of all the parodies and jabs at financial markets and life, which do you consider the most on the nose as far as its representation in the comic goes?

RebelVampire

7) the strips have made me realize in a way that this is another industry where basically theres lots of ridiculous junk going on in the background cause you can never remove human faults completely. cause when it comes to finance theres lots of advanced vocabulary and concepts being thrown around usually, so for someone untrained it can sound intimidating and hard to follow. i think these strips do a great job of humanizing things tho and showing that the concepts arent all that alien cause at the end they were created by humans and reflect the desires of humans in a way. 8) one of my faves that i think is totally on the nose is this one where the economist is telling p-bird about ppl on twitter debating him being ignorant. and that his facts and stuff will prevail but p-bird points out that wouldnt even work on the economist. and the economist goes home confused. i think this is way too true for what its like to argue on the internet and how facts and logic get infinitely buried for the sake of narrative.

Stefan G

Excellent analysis/comments, RebelVampire really constructive. The human element is everywhere and money is such an emotionally laden topic that it’s easy to get confused even without the unnecessary complicated vocabulary ...which is often misused even by so-called “professionals”. If my strip has helped you understand all of that and un-demonised the beast, you’ve made me a very happy man Yeah, the Twitter-Fact-Confusion strip is one of my more relatable strips ... I’ve given up on trying to change people’s minds with facts; if changing minds is possible, it can only be achieved through via emotions. It sounds more logical the other way around but that’s not how we work. Here’s a special academically oriented strip just for you, RebelVampire Enjoy

snuffysam

haven't been able to get all the way through the archive yet, but my answer to both #2 and #8 is the Regional Manager. I love all the characters, but there's something to be said for the simplicity of having a guy literally run around headless.

Stefan G

Thanks , snuffysam. I almost forgot about the regional manager. I have to bring him back to life; I also like him ... by the way, there are 308 strips in total.

Answer to Q7 => I can’t claim that any one strip has changed the way I think about life and/or other things ... however, I do believe that writing & drawing Offshore strips has reinforced in me some of the main ideas from my favourite author, Nassim Nicholas Taleb, who’s books have influenced me deeply [e.g. Black Swan, Antifragile, etc etc] ... luck versus skill, thinking about risk and stuff like that. I regularly come back to his books for inspiration and recommend his books & Twitter -feed. Here are two strips that highlight my point ...sort of

Answer to Q8 => wow tough question ... with 99 % of my strips I genuinely try to convey some message about basic human quirks and/or outright stupidities that actually take place on a regular basis when handling money + and then I add my own personal humours twist to it. Here are a few strips with the message never to buy something you don’t understand [a hint: they always have complicated names]...

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What other finance related topics are you hoping to see the comic explore? Which characters are you hoping to see involved with the topic?

Stefan G

Answer to Q9 => As the creator of the strip I’m obviously biased to answer this question, but I’d love to hear what the new readers have to say. I don’t have a particular preference for any topic [except make fun of pompous forecasters ] ... but I feel myself wanting to write & draw more strips for the Markets-Weasel and Reto und Urs. And that’s surprisingly hard to do; forcing it doesn’t work [at least not for me] ... Offshore’s main characters were supposed to be Reto und Urs and somehow P-Bird and the Economist and the trader stole the show. I guess that happens when you get to know your characters better. Funny how that happens ... here’s one nostalgic strip from my early work that I really enjoy

Stefan G

Addition to Q9 => ... I’ve steadily build up an audience on Twitter [@NonMeek] which consist mainly of likeminded financial and/or other professionals ...hence, hearing the viewpoints from anyone outside that sphere would be awesome

RebelVampire

QUESTION 10. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

RebelVampire

9) idk about specific topics, but id like to see the CEO who i think appeared in like one strip. I'm really interested to see the CEO dynamic with the other characters in terms of finance. learn how they view what theyre doing, how they view what the others are doing, etc. but im all for bringing the regional manager back too cause i enjoyed that character as well. a lot of great humor picking fun at how some managerial positions are kind of ridiculous to even exist to a degree. 10) learning more, mostly. overall its nice to see a harder to cover topic in comics. ive enjoyed how approachable and humanized the strips make finances, and how they remind you that professionals can be like this and actually have no clue what theyre doing. @Stefan G that academic oriented strip you shared was actually one of my faves. not necessarily in college, but i see this a lot in the blogosphere where ppl do a thing once and try to pass themselves as qualified experts to deliver advice. XD

Stefan G

@RebelVampire Thanks again for your opinions. Those really help with the development of the strip ... finance is a hard topic indeed and there are no really finance oriented strips out there [that I know of anyway], which is funny cuz the industry is filled with emotions and mind blowing mental errors. I guess people still believe finance & investing is some sort of scientific discipline which it’s really not ... there are hardly any black & white answers to anything even though there’s lots and lots of historical data ... it’s time to fix that myth with Offshore I’m glad you enjoyed that academic strip. It resonated rather well on Twitter too

@RebelVampire [adding to my previous answer] ... I agree that the managers need to be reanimated and given another chance. I’ll try to do that and see how they resonate. I never know beforehand which characters will work and which will fizzle out; e.g. der Compliance Offizier is one of my favourite characters, yet, resonates weakly outside the banking circles ‍♂️ [I love the strip below ].

keii4ii

I would like to see more strips that cracks jokes about this very specific context of finances! Things like that strip about funds blowing up on day 252. I think that gives this comic its own flavor. Readers get to laugh about not just any kind of incompetent people, but incompetent people in this specific field. Readers with no background in finances don't know the context, so more strips that shed light on the context of the jokes would be great.

Stefan G

@keii4ii All valid and excellent points ... I genuinely try to write & design my cartoons in such a way that the joke is understandable even though you don’t know the context. It’s a hard thing to do ... my wife is my toughest critic and she tells me the same as you ... but keep following Offshore and I promise to come up with more stuff like that 252 strip

Answer to Q10 => My ambition with Offshore is to 1) amuse myself first and see if anyone shares my sense of humour [if a cartoon doesn’t amuse me, I don’t publish it]. It’s a splendid way of letting out some frustration from work ... and 2) to make investing & finance more approachable to the layperson by infusing some humour into it in the form of cartoons ... which by the way nobody thought of doing on a serious basis. Weird. However, to produce material on a semi-regular basis I figured that writing only gags/jokes is too much work and/or too shallow of an approach, hence, the characters in the strip need to be interesting/relatable enough in order to create humorous material by mere interaction with each other. That’s easier said than done. I’m quite satisfied with my characters so far but am continuously looking for new interesting characters to add to the strip [either permanently or impermanently]. Like Scott Adams once told me: “The trick with comics is to reflect the reader's own experience. To allow people to say, "That's me!" I’ll conclude with this sneak peek strip [only for you guys] that should relate to the experience of anybody working in a big corporation.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Offshore Comic this week! Please also give a special thank you to Stefan Gasic for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Offshore Comic, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: http://www.offshorecomic.com/

Stefan’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/NonMeek

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #book club #bookclub #webcomic book club #webcomic bookclub #comic tea party #ctp #offshore comic #stefan gasic

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cvpricornus · 7 years

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i rant :0

many ppl pissed me off

this taurus friend of mine is so stupid and simple-minded; she thinks she can be president for a dance group that is currently being made. does she think that she is qualified??? as a ‘friend’, i know she won’t be responsible and she will quickly lose interest. the whole dancing thing was kinda inspired by me because another friend, libra, said it will be cool if we made a dance club after watching me dance. so i said that it sounds cool, and now we’re making it, and i’ve organized everything on the document we share, and this taurus friend of mine that’s acting like a bitch puts her name next to ‘president’ role on the doc?? bitch i handle things better than u, i am more responsible than u, i basically inspired this idea, and i dance better than u for sure. i actually have good reasons for being president bc i basically have all the credit here.

then this skinny as a stick white kid who’s in my PE class and is a pisces: u think u r a leader?? no u arent. just because our current captain was absent today in volleyball doesnt mean u can just nominate urself leader and order—well, demand people around, while you cant even cooperate with ur fucking team. types of people like u only thing power is important in sports, but no, u know what’s the most important? teamwork. u r just being aggressive like those other fuckers and just because the teacher let u guys be doesnt mean u can ignore the others. and stay! in!! ur!! fucking!!! area!!! u think we can’t hit the fucking volleyball? no shit sherlock!!1!1!! don’t play the game according to ur mood. we get pissed off by that u selfish spoiled bastard. bc of u our team always loses games. ur fucking irrelevant

and phys ed teacher should regulate more for the boys honestly. he chill but no support for girls. i rly want phys ed to be separated by gender at one point then move onto co-ed or something.

my cancerous bio teacher: do u want to die??!?!? i will murder u in ur fucking sleep regardless of ur life bc i will never understand ur unreasonable claims. why tf do u want those problem sets to be on graph paper??? we’re not even integrating math in this fucking unit and u want us to write on graphing paper?? insane. when u commented about that bc of my printed out questions and handwritten answers, i got pissed. “you have to do it on graph paper. come after school to rewrite it,” u said. i replied with “why? and i’m very busy after school” and I WAS BUSY. i had to consult things i didnt know for an upcoming math test and talk with my english teacher about my senior essay. do u think i have time to do irrelevant shit like transcribing answers onto graph paper?? and ur a biology teacher, dont u fucking care for trees? the 5 pages of paper is precious and now u want me to throw that out? why are u even a teacher? u cant even teach for god’s sake. u may know ur shit but the more u explain, the more u make us confused. we students have to study independently from class time in order to understand the lesson we learned on that day. we never understand what ur trying to teach during class time! ur just an unreasonable person. u have to be logical w students. also the other day, u consulted our group saying that we did the whole fucking lab wrong, but we did according to what u said!! now u take back what u’ve taught us? i’m telling u, one day i will give u more fucking attitude bc of ur continuous worthless opinions and teaching

the scorpio girl in my english class: LET PEOPLE SPEAK U MORON. it’s not only ur opinions that matter, other people’s too! dont just stay silent for two seconds for ppl to speak, ask them! and maybe stop listing off all u know about something, let other people have the goddamn opportunity!! u may be smart but do u think that u r in charge? u arrogant piece of shit. ur also a disgrace to ur ethnicity! just because some russian girl was genuinely interested in the korean culture and started learning korean seriously, that doesn’t mean u can go to a korean summer camp (bc u lack those language skills) and return becoming a koreaboo to ur own culture. although im korean, im not like u, u hypocrite. u should know that ur voice is annoying and ur face is punchable, thanks. im srsly questioning how did fate put us in the same group today along with the cancer girl i dont like either. fuck it

ugh these water signs

#personal

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