#lalo salamanca hcs
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got silly goofy high and had an epiphany 😌 (had this cookin in my drafts for weeks yk how it be)
warning: breeding kink, piss kink, spit kink, intox, degradation/slurs
anatomical terms: pussy/cunt, t-dick
“Oh, god, you feel so good… Feels so fucking good, you little whore… You do this often? Spreading your legs for any old man who buys you a drink? Betcha have some real daddy issues, don’tcha, boy?”
Lalo grabbed your chin and spat in your face as he fucked you up against the bathroom stall.
“Slut.”
In response, you reached out and pulled him in closer, sobbing with pleasure into his shoulders. You squeezed him as tight as you could, inside and out. Your chests pressed together as your vice of a cunt milked him dry.
Lalo growled, stabbing his coke nails into your hips and viciously thrusting into you, his balls slapping into your t-dick, the two of you jiggling the flimsy lock on the stall that threatened to give way. “Oh, te pinche putito… Ngh, voy a venir… Voy a venir dentro de tí… Voy a llenarte y poner un pinche bebé en tí, joto… Mmm, te vas a estar tan lleno… Tan lleno de mi leche… (Oh, you little fucking slut… Ngh, I’m gonna cum… I’m gonna cum inside you… Gonna fill you up and put a fucking baby in you, faggot… Mmm, you’re gonna be so full… So full of my cum…)”
You had no clue what he was saying, but it sounded fucking hot. He wasn’t talking to you, moreso at you. This wasn’t a balanced exchange; you were just a hole, one of many he could’ve picked to empty himself in. Your limp body dangled in his arms as he used it, a lifeless sex doll for his sole pleasure. He jerked himself off with your pussy until he came with a loud-
“Fuck!”
And boom goes the dynamite. His hot cum spurted inside you, filling you up just like he said he would. As he flooded your hole, both of your brains flooded with dopamine. That physical satisfaction came alongside mental gratification, reinforcing this debauched behavior. You’d surely seek it out again.
Lalo laughed in delight as the relief washed over him. “Oh… Hah… Haha… Phew, you’re incredible, kid. Best fuck I’ve had in a really long time.” He swept your hair out of your face and tenderly kissed you on the forehead. “I’m gonna pull out now, okay?”
“Nonononono, keep it…” you whined, your limbs locking around his back, “K-Keep it iiin…”
“Aww, you’re precious, honey…” He cooed, peppering kisses along your neck. “But I have to piss, so I kinda have to take it out…”
For some stupid reason, maybe it was the cocktail of substances and the myriad levels of pleasure you were dealing with, or maybe just the immaturity of “haha piss funny”, you started snickering. A lot.
”Oh?” Lalo inquired, “What’s so funny, chiquito?”
The haze of goofy laughter dissipated, and what cast it away was the bright light of an idea. A sick, sinful, salacious idea. “Do you… Do you have to take it out?”
That made Lalo snort. He chuckled, shook his head, and replied, “Oh my god, no. No, baby, you don’t want that. I can’t do that to you… You’re too cute for that…”
You mewled with disappointment, hiding your face in his neck out of shame and praying to whatever god may be that you didn’t make this weird.
Lalo sweetly stroked your hair and sighed. “Look at me.” He commanded, snapping his fingers and you obeyed, picking your face up from the shadows. “You really want it?”
You nodded, your big puppy dog eyes bulging with need.
“Say please.”
“P-Please…”
“Please, who?”
Shit, what was this guy’s name again? He definitely told you… Oh, yeah. “Lalo… P-Please, Lalo…”
“Please, Lalo, what?
Oh, god, he was gonna make you say it? Beg for it, even? …Eh, whatever. Fuck it. “P-Please, Lalo… P-Pee inside me…”
“Good boy.” Lalo pressed his lips to yours. “I will, since you asked so nicely.”
For a few moments, everything was still. Nothing outside the bathroom stall existed, let alone mattered to you right now. All that mattered was Lalo’s cock throbbing inside you. You waited, and waited, you weren’t sure for what. Then, the signal came.
Lalo grunted, “Here it comes, baby.”
And so it did. The most prominent sensation was the intense heat pooling inside your debased hole, filling up what little space there was around his cock. You squirmed and squeaked, gripping his floral shirt in your fists.
“Fuuuck, Lalooo… so waaarm…”
“I know, right?” Lalo dotted more wet kisses along your jaw and neck. “You like it?”
“Mhmmm…”
“Good boy…” He praised, petting your hair while he pissed inside your pussy. You were so full. It was so hot. The pressure was becoming too much to bear. “I’m almost done, honey. You’re taking it so well. You ever do this before?”
You shook your head. “N-No…”
“Well, get ready. It’s about to get even better.”
You were left pondering the meaning of that remark for maybe a second, until his still-hard cock slid halfway out of your hole. His hot piss gushed out and splashed onto the floor. The release of pressure and heat felt like nothing you had ever experienced. You trembled, moaned, and drooled as he slammed his cock back in, picking up where he’d left off: fucking you stupid.
Lalo hissed obscenities in your ear as he fucked you with renewed vigor. “Ngh, qué asco… No creo… No creo que me dejaste hacer eso… Ahh, Acabo de mear en tu chocho, te pinche puto estúpido… Qué un… Mmm, qué un cerdito sucio que eres… (Ngh, so gross… I can’t… I can’t believe you let me do that… Ahh, I just pissed in your cunt, you stupid fucking whore… What a… Mmm, what a dirty little piggy you are…)”
Dripping with piss and cum, you spared a thought for the janitor who’d have to clean this stall later. Hopefully, they wouldn’t know it was you.
#piss kink#lalo salamanca smut#lalo salamanca x reader#lalo salamanca#lalo salamanca hcs#lalo salamanca imagine#lalo salamanca headcanons#bcs#bcs x reader#better call saul#better call saul x reader#better call saul imagine#better call saul smut#better call saul headcanons#better call saul hcs
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…..okay now lalo pre-ejaculation drabbles please 🙏🏼 i love rome, but us lalo girlies are s t r a v i n g
Early in The Morning
Lalo Salamanca x Reader NSFW BLURB
The bed creaks under you as the sun comes up. Warm colors break through the curtains - on the way Lalo presses the head of his cock against your pussy.
You roll your head as you bend back your knees to the sides of your stomach. You hold them there as Lalo's hip slot into place against yours. Over and over and over again as he pushes his cock inside you. Over and over and over.
Lalo presses a hand against yours, both curling just below your knee. It's warmth fizzing in your stomach and your clit as he takes his other hand to rub there. Sparks of fire in the dark, because it's like you're gone in how good you feel.
"Perfect little pussy, Princesa. Perfect-”
His chest flexes with this breath that looks…hurried. Like the first time, but you never remember the first time Lalo took you so well, you just relive it every time he fucks you. Stuffs you. You moan out. You want his hands inside you - or holding yours, or maybe in your mouth.
You want him everywhere and all over. It’s only been fifteen seconds or so of how Lalo’s stuffing you and this should be some sort of forever. Everywhere. You smile in a hot breath.
You watch the way he fucks his cock inside you and the way his ribs expand with his breathing. Lalo stretches you wide, as he does every time - but it always feels new. Like the first time. He looks so beautiful every time.
And now, it’s different. There’s this struggle you can’t describe, a guilt you have because you’re noticing it. But he’s rocking himself into the cradle of your hips harder, wet slapping sounds sounding out and getting you heated on the cheeks, like the muscles of your face are pushing on your skin as the warmth deepens inside you - coiling.
You’re full of him as your walls clench at how he drags the shaft of his cock almost all the way out of your pussy.
“Fuck.”
And he drags the shaft of his cock almost all the way out of your pussy, only to thrust to the hilt in one, hard thrust. Your pussy is full and leaking and you whimper watching.
Lalo curses again.
“Lalo,”
Lalo grunts. His pelvis keeps grinding against your swollen clit as he holds himself on another one thrust. Your wetness smears onto his skin and trimmed hair. Your brows come down, trying to hold the way you’re being fucked on the bed.
“Don’t do that.”
“...Lalo?”
“Just keep crying out, Prin-Fuck.”
Your walls clench around him when he begins knocking his body against yours in a fast, wet rhythm.
Lalo makes a lower noise, something like a grunt - it trails along your spine and makes you shiver.
“Don’t do that. Chingado, don’t-”
He makes himself come into you softer, but you watch as Lalo’s head is thrown back, something like curses and frustration in Spanish, you think. It’s only a soft fucking for a moment before you clench around his cock again.
You feel him throb inside you once, then twice - then something grunt-like punches out of Lalo’s throat. You hold his hand.
You’ve lost the way you’re gone, the way you usually are when you’re under or over Lalo and he’s inside you, how you get so lost in how good it feels, how you want him inside you all the time. You’re just watching how he…cums.
His head comes back, bending low as the dark of his hair clings with sweat to his forehead. Lalo breathes hard, his hips hitting the backs of your thighs and ass.
You swallow and watch as his cum fills your pussy, and you think his low-lidded eyes are trying to stare into yours. But Lalo’s pumping you full of cum, hot.
…He’s cummed. Early. Oh.
This hasn’t happened in a long while. At least you don’t think so. Lalo’s always able to get himself ready and on you again so quickly that it usually doesn’t matter. But that was…that was really quick.
Which is okay. That’s okay, that doesn’t mean anything except that he enjoyed you. It’s stupid the way your heart drops.
You swallow, trying to come off of Lalo’s leaking cock. But it’s just his hands holding your thighs so tightly to press yourself back to him, body to body.
“What did I say?”
“What?”
Lalo’s looking down on you. He scratches his mustache.
He scoffs looking fully down to where he’s finished.
“I said, don’t do that.”
…You don’t know what you did, but Lalo looks angry about it - because it would be your fault? But you don’t know what you’ve done differently than all the other times you’ve made love to him.
“Look what you di-”
You blink fast at Lalo breaking his words by breath. He’s trying to catch himself, you think - and it’s beautiful in the light, but you don’t get it. What you did. You’re still buzzing and you’re confused. You want more. But Lalo’s not moving or using you to get ready and heavy again.
How are you gonna get more?
“Why are you pouting?”
You did feel the worry come onto your lips and brows.
“Lalo-I’m sorry, I just-”
You take his hand from your thigh to kiss. You can do that because it’s the only thing you know how to do in this position, and you’re selfish. You want his hands against your lips.
You’re pulling him towards you in the kiss.
“It just-it happens, sometim-ow! Lalo!”
He’s pinched your nipple hard with his other hand.
“It happens? Is that what you’re telling me?”
Lalo’s mouth is parted, slightly bared and it’s like disbelief in the way he stares at you.
You look away, hand still pressed to your mouth because you need it here. In the confusion and fading pleasure. Lalo goes silent.
Then you hear a breath, something long.
“Princesa, you did that on purpose, huh?”
You turn your head back to see Lalo’s face lighter in the mouth. He comes down onto you and you almost sigh out of pure…bliss. It feels like a childish word in something so simple, but you’ll take all of his body like this if you can’t take it any other way.
Lalo kisses your cheek before tucking his warm face into the crook of your neck, hand coming onto your breast to make you respire with his finger circling your nipple.
“It’s okay, you just wanted to see. You got me. You happy?”
“I-”
Lalo drags his nose over your collarbone, tongue flicking over your skin when he licks his lips.
“My little whore. It’s okay - you just play too much. Making me a damn mess.”
You swallow.
“...I’m sorry.”
You card a hand through his hair, swallowing down any pleading whine to get him fucking you again.
“I know, Princesa.”
You think it’s easier for him to pretend it was something you wanted. So, you just…wrap your legs around his waist. You’ll keep it that way, if it’s easier for the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen. If he keeps himself on you like this for the forever he couldn’t make.
You feel Lalo’s smile on your cheek.
#inbox#hc's#drabble#madman!au#lalo salamanca x reader#better call saul fanfic#lalo salamanca imagine
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I know that if Lalo asked Nacho if he would still love him if he was a worm Nacho would respond : “I don’t even love you now “.
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lalo told gus he had admired him "for many years" but the two hadn't met before
I choose to believe that as gus and max were arriving at eladio's hacienda on that fateful day they briefly crossed paths with lalo on their way in
in a "rise of gus" spin-off I could just see a man in his 30s turning his head as they pass him by and watching them walk away, probably knowing their fate before they could fathom it, then someone calling him by his name as the camera pans to his face and we realize who it is
#this hc is very important to me personally#i wonder if lalo would be smirking#would the situation amuse him or bore him#would he be thoughtful#i cant stop thinking about younger lalo and younger gus#also place your bets#at what age did lalo start having a mustache#lalo salamanca#gus fring#bcs#better call saul
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listen, y’all the fact that lalo didn’t straight up kill kim when she told him that he had to get “his house in order” and that he had to “get his shit together” because he clearly has no one he can trust, means that she was absolutely spot on about that.
and let me be completely real with you --- lalo does not deserve to have people in his life that he can trust, he is murderous, he is untrustworthy and he is just genuinely a bad guy.
but in the same breath, it shakes his to the core. especially when he’s in america. he has people in mexico that he cares about and trusts, and it’s extremely obvious by the way the he greets everyone at his house. but in america, all he has is nacho and after she says that to him, i think he finally realizes he’s right.
i’m literally not excusing anything he does, or trying to make light of it, but honestly, he was fucking gutted when he realized it was nacho that had set him up.
AND LOOK AT THIS FACE. tell me he doesn't fucking love hector with all of his heart. CAUSE HE FUCKIGN DOES.
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Do you have any funny head canons for Lalo? Not even funny per se but just weird shit he might do?
Nora I'm gonna smooch you.
Lalo 'Eduardo' Salamanca - Funny Headcannons
Warnings: General NSFW talk, Lalo needs his own warning tbh. Dark humor! Morbid humor! a lot of implied psychological manipulation. Cartel boy does Cartel shit. You know how it goes.
Lalo has a lot of strange and somewhat funny quirks.
First and foremost, the fact that he refuses to sleep longer than an hour or two at a time is wild. You need your sleep, which he does understand, but he also can't sit still so you often wake up in an empty bed.
He'd have your sleep schedule memorized, though. Knows about when you get tired, when you wake up, the times you stir to go to the bathroom, etc. Of course, he doesn't tell you that, but you find it uncanny that he can anticipate when you need to lay down or when to have breakfast ready in the morning.
Another weird thing Lalo does is zoning out. Sometimes, you can talk to him, and he's empty eyed, staring at the window, motionless. It's uncanny to you because you have no idea what's going on inside his head. But then he'd blink, and the light would return to him and he'd smile at you and encourage you to continue talking.
The guy has a thing about pushing peoples buttons.
He just... he craves being a menace - mostly because no one can really do anything to stop him. Lalo often smiles or grins when someone is getting worked up/flustered when he's prodding at their nerves.
Unfortunately, that means you catch the receiving end of it too.
Lalo can't help it! He loves watching you get riled up and red-faced. He thinks you shouting is adorable, and the hard, angry fucking afterwards is sublime. Lalo sports your claw marks like trophies, calls you his little wild cat.
Another thing he does that's weird is mirroring. Lalo is good at adapting and charming folks, sometimes he mirrors you to get what he wants.
Not in the mood for sex? Well, that's okay! How about we lay in bed and laugh? What's this? His hand is between your legs while he cracks jokes in your ear. Weird, guess you changed your mind.
Not a weird HC but he's intentionally withdrawn.
He keeps a lot of stuff to himself, making it difficult to discern if he's really upset or not.
Another weird thing is he likes to watch you shower.
He'd sit on the sink or lean against it, while pulling the door open to watch you quietly. Sometimes it seems like he's admiring you and others he looks almost angry.
You know he see's you as a weakness.
He's protective, always thinking 10 steps ahead.
You are his, after all.
Lalo is a gift giver. He likes to buy you stuff you mention off handedly. It's eerie sometimes because he gets you things you didn't realize you even wanted.
Like he's bringing home a dress you glanced at while shopping with him, and now there it is, in your hands. Meanwhile, he's smiling ear to ear and kissing your head, asking if you like it and watching your reaction.
Lalo is weird in the sense he's not extremely physical. The guy is similar to a cat. He'll pat your back, ruffle your hair or tap your chin, but he doesn't do many hugs or kisses. Even when you two are alone.
Though he would definitely not mind you laying against him, asleep, while he watched the fire pit and let his thoughts wander.
However, when the mood strikes him?
Lord he's on you.
Mouth on yours, devouring you, kissing and biting. Can't keep his hands off of you, groping and squeezing and just all over you.
Lalo isn't super weird, but he has those little mannerisms you find charming!
#lalo salamanca#eduardo salamanca#tony dalton#better call saul#bcs#lalo salamanca headcannons#lalo salamanca headcanons#lalo salamanca headcannon#lalo salamanca headcanon#eduardo lalo salamanca#eduardo salamanca headcannons#eduardo salamanca headcanon#eduardo salamanca headcanons#eduardo salamanca headcannon#eduardo salamanca x you#eduardo salamanca x reader#lalo salamanca x you#lalo salamanca x reader#bettercallsaul#salamanca
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Can we get Lalo hcs for a sarcastic reader who jokes around a lot?
i enjoyed writing this more than i should. simply becuase you described me in that ask so it was pretty self indulgent heheh
•It's a change of pace that's for sure
•Lalo is used to being the ones with the jokes most of the time. I mean, it's not like being in the cartel really inspired a lot of people to run their mouth. And even he would admit, he had leeway with the way he spoke. Being a Salamanca and all
•But the first time he had the pleasure of crossing paths with you, he quickly came to see that you didn't really care who he was. Not even bothering to pay attention to Nachos exasperated looks before you were talking a mile a minute
•"Hey Nacho! What's that good smelling stuff? You get another cook? Don't tell me you fired the last one he had good tamales. Oh cool, nevermind. New guy! Funny mustache, man. Listen, the middle aged dad down the street called, he wants his look back."
•You spoke so quickly Lalo couldn't help but bark out a laugh, mirroring your brittle smile with a more genuine expression
•"I like this one Nachito!"
•You intrigued him. He wondered how his tio had delt with you and your motor mouth before the heart attack and all. Clearly differently than usual, or you'd already be in a ditch somewhere riddled with bullet holes
•It was like you had a certain aura that protected you really. Probably the confusion that came from your cheery and blunt demeanor to be honest but it was still a mystery to Lalo how you'd managed to say in the game so long nonetheless
•He'd also observed how well you and Nacho worked together. You talked enough for the both of you, being the one to fill the silence durring deals with sarcasm and cheesy jokes while Nacho somberly counted money. Though you were never afraid to not so discreetly flash the gun resting on your hip if someone got smart with either of you
•And from what he could tell you were a pretty damn good shot too
•Yeah. He planned on keeping you around with him for a while
#lalo salamanca x reader#lalo salamanca#lalo#lalo x reader#nacho#nacho varga#better call saul#better call saul x reader#x reader#headcanons#request#breaking bad universe#breaking bad universe x reader
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So, Tuco has a brother in law named Gonzo, which means he has a sister, which means it’s possible that Tuco is a uncle. That’s so fucking cute!
Here’s some HCs~
Camila and Gonzo are the healthiest and purest couple in the breaking bad universe. No abuse, no toxicity, just pure love and support. Gonzo is also the best husband ever.
Their dynamic is two sweet cinnamon rolls that deserve the world.
Tuco was not happy when he heard that Gonzo (his real name is Lorenzo) and his sister Camila were a thing. Camila had to stop him from killing Gonzo. He felt that Gonzo wasn’t good enough for his sister. He was just some nobody and she was a Salamanca, cartel royalty.
But when Tuco saw how they interacted and how much Camila loved Gonzo, he relented. But not without threatening poor Gonzo’s life a couple times.
Camila’s love for Gonzo blossomed because he was the only man she knew that was genuinely a good guy. Also, Camila has alway had a thing for thick boys.
Despite being a criminal, Gonzo doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. He’s a teddy bear who’d do anything for Camila. She calls him, “osito de peluche.”
Camila loves baking especially for her husband. She’s the reason why Gonzo fails every diet he tries to stick to.
Most of the Salamancas didn’t approve of the match so Camila and Gonzo got married in secret, in small church, with only Tuco and Nacho there.
This caused quite a lot of family drama. Hector was enraged that’d Camila would disobey him, he wanted to kill Gonzo to serve as a lesson but Tuco actually stood up against Hector for the first time in his life to protect his sister.
Tuco: You’re going to let them be happy or-
Hector: Or what?! You think you’re a big man now?! Huh?!
Tuco: If you don’t leave them alone then I’m out.
He threatens to leave the family business and Hector laughs in his face at first, but Tuco was being dead serious. He swore that he’d take Camila and leave the country. In the end, Hector relented.
Camila and Gonzo named their first son Hector to try smooth things over with him. Everyone accepted their marriage when they started having kids, even Hector. (Hector still treats Gonzo like a servant than a family member though.)
They have 4 bebés in total, 3 girls and one boy. Tuco loves his little nieces and nephews to death. He’s crazy fun loving uncle Tuco. Who spoils his nieces and nephews rotten. (If anyone ever found out that he plays dollhouse with his nieces, he’d have to kill himself.)
Camila doesn’t allow Tuco around them when he’s high or using, for obvious reasons. She even checks him before letting him in the house. She won’t hesitate to throw his ass out if he does come around high.
Lalo and the twins visit from Mexico occasionally and they get Christmas cards every year. Or Gonzo and Camila go up to Mexico to visit them.
Each one of the cousins is one of the children’s godfather.
Lalo loves to tease Gonzo. He calls him “Gordo.” Gonzo doesn’t mind the nickname, he just hates Lalo’s mind games. Lalo also doesn’t hesitate to exploit Gonzo’s love for Camila to get Gonzo to do something for him.
But Camila is very protective of her husband, especially around her family. If one of her cousins are giving him a hard time, she won’t hesitate to chew them out. Once Gonzo got really hurt while on a job with the twins and Camila screamed at them for ten minutes. Since she is their elder cousin, the two deadly assassins just sat there and took it.
The twins creep Gonzo out but they do treat him much like how they treated Nacho. They respect him for treating Camila like a princess and making her happy.
Honestly, poor Gonzo. Having to deal with the Salamancas every day and do their dirty work. But it all becomes worth it when he comes home every night to his amor Camila and their lil bebés.
#tuco salamanca#camila salamanca#lalo salamanca#marco salamanca#leonel salamanca#nacho varga#breaking bad gonzo#breaking bad#better call saul
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lalo salamanca headcanons
He's a black-hearted asshole. It's an important core aspect of his character and it can't be ignored.
He has a dead sibling. My HC is a dead sister who got married and then her husband killed her. Death lives cheek by jowl in the Salamanca family. There's a reason for those empty spaces.
He wasn't born with severe antisocial tendencies, and a naturally extroverted personality made him more open to experiences than some of his more rigid relatives. The rot set in to the idealism early, maybe 7 or 8 years old. I actually see the twins grappling with suppressing their feelings more than Lalo - he's the perfect adaptable boy-Prince that adapts to suit the family, and never really took the time to build anything under that veneer. He takes information in purely to benefit himself or benefit his family. The emotionality and empathy has been stripped away. This is a DARK character.
One of the roles he's tried on that he's put a little more into is the benefactor role to the peasants that live on/or near his estate, in fact most of the underlings associated with the Salamanca holdings. It reinforces to Lalo a sense of benevolence, which at its core is still basically transactional. The people under him have no choice to do what they do. It's the performance of helping them out that makes Lalo feel good about himself.
He was absolutely going to murder Kim when Jimmy left. That whole speech about the people the assassins killed at his hacienda reeked of a tit-for-tat situation. He no longer trusted Jimmy at all so he had no further utility to him as a lawyer. He was going to kill Jimmy's wife as punishment for that, torture the truth out of Jimmy when he returned from the laundrette, and then kill him.
Lalo's blue shoes tie into what I mentioned about him having an attachment to being seen as perfect/a benefactor/on the "right" side of things. Blue = personal law in BCS. Lalo never does anything that doesn't benefit himself or his family, so he always sees himself as following the correct path. He feels 100% justified in his sabotage mission against Gus, and then in the atrocities he commits in attempting to come back and bring him up in front of Eladio. He would actually feel morally angry at the implication any of that wasn't right - you protect yourself and you protect your family. In his eyes, he's bringing a liar and a traitor to justice, a snake who is attempting to bring down their cartel from the inside. In that respect, Lalo has a parallel with the most unlikeliest of BCS characters - Chuck McGill.
The insomnia is the barest of brush strokes that imply Lalo's possible ambivalence about the life he was born into. Gilligould have notoriously not given the characters of colour much contextual depth at all outside of roles that serve the cartel story, and Lalo is no exception, but I still think it was the barest of indicators of another story being played out there. Like Howard Hamlin dissuaded early on from putting up his own shingle and making an identity for himself outside of what his father expected of him, Lalo, neck deep in the lifetime role of cartel Prince, may have felt the twingings of his own destiny being held away from him. TDalton's comments about Lalo believing he could die at any point has an interesting, nihilistic extension here - so why bother?
He's a Hufflepuff. His people, his group, and himself above all. Duty, discipline, and "fairness" - all Puff traits. His contempt for Slytherin Gus is for Gus's refusal to accept his position and bend the knee - he sees Gus's strident individualism as selfish, in comparison to his own lifelong commitment to his family and the cartel. On the positive side, he can do a surface level cohesion with groups, some performative actions of good on behalf of the group(s) he identifies with, and skilfully takes Nacho and sends him up to the boss. There's a reason old ladies seem to adore Lalo - he, in an entirely selfish sense, works within the group.
#lalo salamanca headcanons#better call Saul#listen I've seen the posts extolling lalo as some romantic figure and if that's how you like him then sure#but honestly black-hearted murdering asshole Lalo Salamanca is a great character to me#he is incapable of having a human relationship! he's a cautionary tale about the effects of soul-degrading violence!#he is an extremely smooth presentation of cartel violence in the real world being soulless and sociopathic#and that's compelling shit! that's a real character!#uncompromising evil has depths#tbh I wish they could've done more on the cartel Prince side of things. I would totally watch Lalo Salamanca returning to Mexico instead#and pulling Shakespeare levels of shenanigans on Don Eladio to get him to turn against Gus#give me the Lalo Salamanca that has influence and turns men against each other for profit#and a wounded bat-sh*t sense of justice
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✧˖° Masterlist ˖⁺‧₊˚ ✧
⊹˙⋆ Lalo Salamanca ⋆˙⊹
Series:
A Love so Sweet, it Hurts
One-shots:
It’s a Salamanca!
HCs & Drabble
TBA
⊹˙⋆ The Salesman ⋆˙⊹
Series:
TBA
One-shots:
TBA
HCs & Drabbles:
⊹˙⋆ Helmut Zemo ⋆˙⊹
Series:
TBA
One-shots:
TBA
HCs & Drabbles:
TBA
#lalo salamanca fanfic#lalo salamanca x reader#lalo salamanca#lalo salamanca x oc#helmut zemo#helmut zemo x reader#the salesman#the salesman squid game#the salesman x reader#the salesman x oc
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fuck it lalo rimming drabble. whatever. it’s 2 in the morning
warning: spit kink, degradation, face-slapping, mentions of face-sitting
“You want me to do what?”
The way he snarled around that last word caused shame to boil in your stomach, blood to rush to your cheeks. You immediately regretted saying it, and tried backpedaling hard, “I-If you don’t want to, it’s fine, just-!”
“Shhh…” Lalo pressed his thumb to your lips, forcing them closed. His other fingers swept under your chin and tilted it up to him. He craned his neck closer, his predatory eyes never leaving your face, studying every minute twitch and blink that graced your features for even a millisecond. His thumb dragged from your lips to your cheek, and swirled in circles of affection. “Qué cara tan linda… (Such a pretty face…)”
You squeaked and closed your eyes, trying to ignore the feeling of his burning into you. Or maybe that was the heat of your own embarrassment cooking you alive. Whatever it was, it was unbearable. You stayed willfully blinded, shielding yourself from reality and just focusing on the tender touch of his calloused hand. It was working. You stopped trembling, your breathing started to regulate. It seemed like everything was gonna be okay…
“You really want me to sit on it?”
…and then you were slammed face-first into reality like a fucking brick wall. Wake up, asshole.
“C’mon. Look at me.” Lalo tapped your cheek repeatedly until your eyelids just barely propped open. You slowly hoisted them up all the way up, then blinked away your shame until you could see him in focus. His expression was unclockable, only adding to your anxiety. “Tell me what you said.”
“I-, uh…” You swallowed hard, the words weighing much heavier when they weren’t rolling off your tongue in a brainless blip of passion. “I want you to sit on my face, Lalo.”
He chuckled in response, enamored by the way your depravity seemed to take priority over your dignity. You doubled down, and that was more than enough for him.
“Nasty fucking bitch.” He growled in approval, shaking you by the jaw to flaunt his literal and psychological grip on you. And if that wasn’t enough, he spat in your face, the heavy glob of spit draping over your nose and gradually dripping downwards. It went flying off your face when he slapped it. Then he threw you down against the bed with a firm command.
“Lay down on your back, whore.”
#lalo salamanca#lalo salamanca smut#lalo salamanca x reader#lalo salamanca hcs#lalo salamanca imagine#lalo salamanca headcanons#bcs#better call saul#better call saul x reader#better call saul hcs#better call saul headcanons#better call saul smut#bcs x reader
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Can we get some more somno Lalo with Princesca? I loved your HCs and I can see Lalo getting really intense with sleepy/sleeping Princesca especially because he gets his best ideas when everyone else is sleeping
Bite Down
Lalo Salamanca x Reader
NSFW, SOMNO, Biting, Very slight actual PIV smut at the end.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.
Your neck is bare. Lalo laughs to himself.
You're naked from the neck down - all of you just open to him. He's betting you're cold, his sleepy girl. The things the man does to you...a bare neck shouldn't get to him.
But Lalo's watching your skin there and an idea pulses against his teeth. He laughs, or just exhales out the nose before he feels his face just come....just come to nothing. A nice stare on you.
You don't even know. He could do anything to Princesa and you wouldn't know. No, you'd just wake up with those little noises that don't help to stop him. But you never want him to stop, do you?
Lalo presses his thumb against his tooth.
Then again, maybe it's not just the skin of your neck tilted getting to Lalo, maybe it's all of you coming together on the bed. Mumbling, sleepy. And you're his girl, it'd be wrong for there to be times where he doesn't want your body.
Sweet, sleepy little body.
The heavy pit sets in, cause of course it does. It's night and Lalo's alone in his thoughts - it was either sooner or later for his eyes to come on you, making sure that he'll have you. He has you like this all the time.
Maybe it's just the heat of the night that's getting Lalo heavier with his thoughts, heavier with his eyes. He'll have to make sure to not squeeze so tightly.
Lalo brushes his nose along Princesa's cheek and his chin follows after. He hums low. He likes to hum, you like to hear him hum. You're probably dreaming about it - all those mumbles humming along with him.
He smiles when you lean into the scratch of his mustache on your skin. Pretty pretty, untouched skin. Nothing's ever broken through.
Just the one time. Just that one time that he wasn't there for, but that wasn't his fault, Princesa. Nah, you were making mistakes and you were alone. You don't do good alone.
Lalo takes a hand between your legs, petting your inner thighs.
"There you go, Princesa."
You're rolling your hips into his touch, cause of course you are. You need him too much, even in your sleep.
Lalo kisses and kisses, making himself gentle against the pulse of his teeth. Your soft curving jaw. You smell good.
You smelt like grease the first time he met you. He'll never tell you that unless you ask, cause even with a tease you'll get all pouty. Hurt and you'll start thinking too much. He'll have to soothe you.
He groans. Lalo feels his cock twitch, blood rushing down. Body on fire - he can laugh again cause you've got him bad. Lalo will admit to that.
Maybe teasing you isn't the worst thing. But he smelt that vanilla under all the grease of the kitchen, the warmth of a shy, mumbled thing who needed someone to keep her so badly.
"That's a sweet thing. Sweet Princesa."
He'd do anything for you, Princesa, like keep this going. All the way until you wake up whimpering. Ay,
He rolls his back and hushes you when you make soft, struggled sounds. But you roll up into his touch, so open for your guy.
"I've got you. Papi has you...you left your neck so open, Princesa. What for, huh?"
Lalo grips your other thigh, rough touch on your skin. In his grasp. He presses his forehead into yours.
He holds your jaw and neck with a palm, breathing a hot breath on you because you're just too much. You gotta know. Little slut. Just a whore - you want all the ensangrentada things as much as he does. You've never denied him and hell, sometimes for your own safety, Lalo has to deny you. When you've got yourself in a tunnel while he's fucking you.
Not surprising, you're here dreaming of him.
Lalo comes down to suck on your jaw, then your neck - something you get so heated about. Grasping at him and wrapping your legs around his waist, needy whore. He wouldn't have it any other way, huh?
Not as he laps at your sweat. Can't be cold when your guy is the one to take care of you. He takes care of you, like how your little sounds can take care of his cock and get the pit red.
...La-" Lalo...Lalo doesn't know, he's not one to think deep in his movements, he just moves his mouth to bare his teeth along your skin, hand gripping your thigh to come up to squeeze hard at your breast. "La..."
Lalo.
He pinches your nipple. Not careful, but he's not gonna care - you'll wake up and he won't have one thought on the way he just...bites down.
"Princesa."
Lalo tastes perfection. He tastes why the night should last forever.
"...Lalo?"
He opens you up, perfect pussy bare when he bends your legs against his stomach.
You're breathing hard. So confused.
The image sits hot in Lalo's head - he just bites harder.
"Lalo!"
He's not gonna come up, but he has to cause he's a gentle man with you, he wants his cock inside you and he wants it to feel good for you. Lalo will have to let go so he can get you wet - but just one bite more.
"Ah - Lalo!"
He bites harder when your arms come around his back, pulling him in. Confused and warm Princesa.
His hand slips down from your breast and he smiles.
"Already wet, what were you dreaming about?"
Lalo licks at your little bite mark, it tastes like the rest of his goddamn life. God willing, but Lalo...
And forgive him, lord, but he can fight the unwilling.
Lalo breathes with your gasps. Keep gasping, Princesa. Little whore, so wet already.
You're more than willing, you're his.
Lalo bend your legs against your body, kissing your toes. He presses his cock against your pussy.
You moan out when he fucks himself inside of you, cock slipping in his sweet girl.
Instead of rolling his head back or breathing harder than a man like him is supposed to, Lalo bites back down, the rest of his life tasting like red.
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Now more into the headcanon of “los salamanca are mexican roma “
All of them speak roma as a way to say stuff without anyone understanding
They are descendants from Spanish and Polish roma.
All the cartel doesn’t know that what they speak is roma , some think is Nahuatl or Zapoteco and think that they have indigenous roots ( the cartel is ignorant af )
Lalo loves polkas and flamenco and knows how to dance them , cause his mother used to perform on show and knew different styles of roma dance as russian, polish, balkans, flamenco and even perfomed at the romen theater in Moscu (the first Roma Theater in Russia and one of the more famous)
They have connections in Europe with the organized crime Roma that are in Spain and other parts of Europe such as Ukraine
The cousins know how to read tarot cards and are involved in the esoteric side of the roma culture
Héctor always told them to never said to anyone that they are roma , as he and his family were discriminated for that
Also the reason we don’t see Salamanca women is cause they either do the house/ raising kids stuff as Roma clans / families are very traditional or they work as performers/spies all over the world with their own Roma Company (which they also use to smuggle drugs and trade them for guns , spy on enemies or form connections with other clans )
Ps. I’ll probably add more stuff later ,If any of these ideas or Hc I write inspire you go ahead I cant write to save my life
#better call saul#lalo salamanca#tony dalton#hector salamanca#marco and leonel salamanca#marco salamanca#leonel salamanca#bcs headcanon#the salamanca family#Héctor Salamanca
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a headcanon ive thought about for women in the salamanca family is one who isn’t really involved in the business but happily benefits from it if that makes sense- super spoiled, might have an attitude or a “bitchy” persona, probably very confident, she knows what her brothers, cousins, uncles are up to but she might turn a bit of a blind eye to it, etc. i feel like one like that might be a sister to lalo or very close to him for obvious reasons lol. or maybe even like a meadow soprano of the family.
There are definitely some Salamanca women like that (like my hc for Lalo's mom, Reina), particularly the ones who married in. Like, why else would you marry a narco unless you love money and don't care where it comes from so long as you don't have to get dirty yourself? I think that their daughters might be more of a mixed bag, though - some of them will have their mothers' attitudes, but others might feel stifled and insulted at the idea of being pampered and left out when they'd rather take an active role. And maybe some don't want any part of the evils of narco life at all
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lalo is honestly a really lonely person. but he only ever feels that way when he’s up, all alone in the middle of the night. he never tells anybody about it either and despite how nacho feels about him, he was truly the first person he genuinely trusted and liked spending time with, in quite some time.
#LALO SALAMANCA. (MUSE)#LALO SALAMANCA. (HC)#He’s a monster - don’t get me wrong#But he has human qualities sometimes ish
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Link Directory.
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Story Masterlist (characters)
Miguel O'hara
Series;
The Start of Something - Ellison Oswalt x Reader
Chapter 1 - SFW
Chapter 2 - NSFW
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My Goddess - Arthur Harrow x Reader (NSFW, contains prts 1-3)
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Memories - Homelander x Reader
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Right place Right time - Ray Harris x Reader
Chapter 1 - NSFW
Chapter 2 - NSFW
Chapter 3 - NSFW
Magic - Albert Shaw/Grabber x Reader (Oneshot | NSFW)
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Feral - Edward Dalton x Reader (Drabble | NSFW)
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Soft Edward Dalton! (SFW, Fem!Reader)
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Dark!Miguel O'hara HC's (SFW)
Lalo Salamanca 'weird' HC's (NSFW)
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Russel Millings x Reader (NSFW)
James Sandin x Reader (SFW)
Father Paul x Reader (SFW)
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Ellison Oswalt x Reader (SFW)
Edward Dalton x Reader (Light NSFW)
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