I know that if Lalo asked Nacho if he would still love him if he was a worm Nacho would respond : “I don’t even love you now “.

dropped an ask then had a lightbulb moment so you get to hear it. what do you think about a reader with a Nacho n Lalo sharing situation? Lalo going a bit rough one time [thinking the dacryphilia one!!!!!!!!!], Nacho hearing n coming in n mediating, trying to give the reader comfort by petting their hair or murmuring to them through it, but Lalos busy using them to get off saying “pshhhh it’s fine” n having his way til they’re overstimmed, sobbing into Nachos lap until Lalo finishes, all of them knowing the reader doesn’t get to come even if Lalo goes for round 2 […but maybe Nacho will fix that later ;)]

NACHO GIRLIES I PROMISED I WOULD FEED YOU!!!!!! haven't written him AT ALL since jefe (and he was just There 🧍‍♂️) so this been a long time coming 😌 hehe cumming giggity

this ended up being really long so i put it under a cut. i actually wanted to keep going w/ this so i may add on to it and put it on ao3 later 😳

combining w/ this ask

warning: dacryphilia, degradation, orgasm denial, dubcon

anatomical terms: cunt/dick (reader's), coño/cunt/cock/verga (nacho's), dick/cock (lalo's)

Lalo had invited you and Nacho into his home, welcoming you with open arms. He gave you the grand tour, proclaiming that you both would live like kings in your time with him, and you could see why. His house practically was a heavily guarded castle; only thing missing was a moat. He had introduced you to his staff, his people, and they all were so excited to have you. They seemed like a genuinely nice bunch.

You wondered if they could hear you right now.

They probably could. You weren't exactly quiet, quite the opposite, actually. You were wailing and blubbering as Lalo pounded into your cunt, his coke nails leaving indents in your skin as he gripped the back of your knees.

You were choking back tears, snot, and your orgasm as you begged for lenience. “Lah… *sniff* Lah-loh… Lalo, Lalo, Lalo... Too… *hic* Too much… I can't..."

"Yes you can," Lalo answered for you, "You can take it. You wanna be a good boy for me, right? Then you have to wait for me to tell you. We're not done yet."

You whined and moaned as he continued his onslaught. You were loud. Loudly sobbing and sniffling as he thrusted into you. Loud squelching and skin slapping reverberated around the room. You remembered all those kind people he introduced you to today, and you prayed to God that they were all asleep. You wouldn't be able to bear the humiliation otherwise.

Luckily, they all were. But someone else wasn't.

Nacho couldn't get a wink of sleep. First from anxiety, and then because he heard something. Something that sounded serious. Stupidly, he went to go investigate. He rubbed his eyes, blinded by the light as he cracked open the door to Lalo's room. “Hey, is everything alright? I thought I heard someone cry-" Once he took his hand away from his face, he was then blinded by the traumatizing (to him at least) sight of Lalo Salamanca's bare ass. "Oh my GOD, dude, really?!”

You yelped and buried your face in your hands, embarrassed to be so exposed. Lalo didn’t care. He didn't slow down. He didn’t even turn to look at Nacho. “That’s what happens when you don’t knock, cabrón (asshole)!” He laughed.

“Shit, man, I thought I heard someone crying and…” Nacho got a better look at you and stopped short. Someone was crying. You were crying. What the fuck? What the hell was going on? Was this even consensual? Had Lalo been violating you the whole time you three had worked together? He gulped in fear and tried in vain to question his boss, “Aren’t you going too hard, you think?”

“Nah, he’s fine. He can take it. He likes it rough.” Lalo grunted. He hoisted your legs up onto his shoulders, and used one of his now free hands to reach behind him and beckon Nacho over. “Debes venir aquí y míralo. Verás que lo quiero decir. Él es un putito sucio, no te preocupes. (You should come and watch. You’ll see what I mean. He’s a dirty little slut, don't you worry.)” Lalo stopped moving his hips and pulled your hands away to get your attention. “Look! Say hi to Nachito!" He made you wave at him. "He’s gonna come watch for a bit. You must've been pretty loud to make him worry about you, eh? He just wants to make sure that you’re okay. Can he watch? Just for a little while, nene (baby), I promise.”

Your cheeks were bright red and boiling hot, tears bubbling down that did nothing to quench the flame. You looked over at Nacho, who had a look of genuine concern on his face, and then back up at Lalo, who looked cheery as ever. You sniffled and stuttered your answer, "O-Okay..."

Lalo cackled. "Alright! Now it's a party!" He glanced over his shoulder back at Nacho. "C'mon! Get over here. I won't bite! Well, not you at least. Unless you want me to." He winked and clicked his tongue at him.

Nacho sighed, really regretting his decision to be the hero right about now. Had he just chosen to mind his own business, he could’ve been lying in his room, maybe even asleep and oblivious, getting some decent fucking shut-eye for the first time in his goddamn life. Instead, his big mouth had bought him the brilliant responsibility of babysitting his batshit crazy boss’s bedroom behavior. He could rob the Patrón distillery and it wouldn’t get him enough alcohol to drink this memory away. He approached the bed begrudgingly, arms crossed over his chest. "How do you want me?"

Lalo's hands snuck around your waist and lifted you up, pressing your chest against his own. He spoke to Nacho as if you weren't even there. "Sit behind him. I’ll put him in your lap. And be nice to him, okay? He’s sensitive."

The irony of that statement was not lost on Nacho. He rolled his eyes as he climbed onto the bed, sitting down behind you criss-cross applesauce, y'know, as you do in a completely normal situation like this. Lalo laid you down gently so your head could rest in the other's lap, just like he said. Nacho brushed your hair out of your face, and as your eyes met his, his expression went from frustration to trepidation. At least, that's it looked like upside down. He didn't want to risk making things worse for you, so he mouthed the words: Are you okay? You nodded, and that seemed to relax him a little.

"See? There we go! Everything's fine." Lalo cooed and caressed your cheek. "Are you ready, conejito (bunny)?"

Nacho cringed at the pet name, but you loved it. "Mhm..." you whispered.

Having gotten the green light, Lalo took hold of your thighs, pushed them up to your chest, and got back to work, recklessly pistoning his hips into you like you were nothing more than a hole for him. Like you were a sex doll, a tiny little thing that he could manipulate however he wanted, however would make him feel the best. The new position let him reach even deeper, making you cry even harder. "Ah! Lalo! Lalo! Mmh! F-Fu- *sniff* Fuck... Fuck me! *sniff* Fuck me!"

"I am, sweetheart!" Lalo smiled at you, then Nacho. "See how much he likes this? I told you he's a slut."

As much as he hated to admit it, Nacho was fascinated by this, by you more specifically. There was no doubt in his mind that you were enjoying yourself, but you were crying, practically howling like you wanted it to stop, like you were in agony, but it wasn't agony. It was ecstasy.

For you, at least. For Lalo, it was business as usual. He was definitely enjoying it, but he was eerily calm about the whole thing, barely even breaking a sweat. He could even crack a joke at Nacho's expense. "Si tu coño sea la mitad bueno que esto, tal vez deberé probarlo después, ¿verdad? (If your cunt is half as good as this, maybe I'll have to try it out later, right?)"

Nacho ignored him, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of a response. He just gazed down it you, almost in awe. He gently stroked your hair, making you nuzzle into his touch as you sobbed. "Does it feel good?" he asked you.

Your eyes slammed shut as you moaned, "Yes! Yes, god, yes! Ah! So *hic* good! So good! *sniff* God... *sniff* it's... *sniff* so... *sniff* good! Fuck me! Fuck me more!" You weren't sure who you were talking to anymore.

Lalo assumed it was him. "Dios mío, muñequito (My god, doll), you are shameless!" He teased, "Now, just because we have a guest doesn't mean the rules change. You can't cum until I say so." He spanked your ass to punctuate his statement, before attempting to engage Nacho in conversation again, "Está tan necesitado. Siempre me está rogando que le deje a venir. Es una lástima que no tengas una verga, si no dejaría tocarte el turno en él. Es lindo, ¿verdad? (He's so needy. He's always begging me to let him cum. It's a shame that you don't have a cock, otherwise I'd let you take a turn on him. He's cute, right?)"

"S-Sí, él es... (Yeah, he is...)" Nacho responded, his eyes not leaving you as you writhed in his lap. Maybe if he stared at you long enough, his eyes would blur out everything but your face, and Lalo and his dick would fade into obscurity.

But they didn't. Lalo's presence only got more intrusive as he neared his peak. "Mierda, estoy cerca... Tan apretado... (Shit, I'm close... So tight...)" He groaned, "Acá, agarra sus manos. Voy a venir dentro de lo (Here, grab his hands. I'm gonna cum inside of him.)" Nacho did as he asked, taking your wrists in his hands, holding you down so Lalo could have his way with you. Lalo sighed in approval at him, "Good boy," and then at you, "You too. Such good boys, the both of you." He stroked your cheek and wiped your tears with his thumb. "I'm gonna cum inside you, pretty boy. Doesn't that sound nice? Gonna be so... ngh... so nice and full... fuck..." Lalo gave a few more hard thrusts before he buried himself inside you, humming as he filled you to the brim with his cum. You trembled and whimpered underneath him, squirming against Nacho's grasp, your dick painfully hard and untouched, longing for attention.

Lalo pulled his cock out, hissing in delight as he watched his cum spill out of you. "Oh, look at that. Gorgeous." He tapped your cheek again so you could open your eyes. "You stay right here. I'm gonna go get us all something to drink, okay?" Lalo kissed your forehead and climbed off the bed, directing his next line to Nacho, "Don't try anything funny, you hear?" He laughed as he cloaked himself in a silk bathrobe and left the room, heading for the kitchen, leaving the door wide open. What? His house, his rules.

You and Nacho stared at each other awkwardly, your chest rising and falling as you worked on stabilizing your breath. How the fuck do you start a conversation after that? Nacho cleared his throat to make an attempt. "So, uh... he doesn't let you finish?"

You shook your head. "N-No... Not until he says so..."

Nacho frowned. "That's not cool..." He listened intently for a second, sighing when he heard movement downstairs. Lalo was gone. Now was his chance. "Here..." He took your neglected dick between two fingers and started to stroke you.

"...Let me help."

Low-key picturing an angry Nacho using Lalo's full name to emphasize how mad he is. Lalo has a heartattack the first time he hears him shouting "Eduardo!"

i almost included that! imagining "EDUARDO you left the floor wet AGAIN" or "eduardo d'aureville salamanca, we do not need to kill this man"

lalo hates it <3

do you have any specific favorite headcannons when it comes to lacho, gusmax, or just bcs in general??

DAMNIT I have so many headcanons but whenever I get asked this question I forget them all

But

Lalo's lack of sleep lets talk about that😌 I love the hc that Nacho's his security blanket and is the only reason he can sleep (bc he's usually plagued with thoughts of death and betrayal of course) but I like to think with Lalo's obsessive behavior he just watches Nacho sleep like the creep he is. My guy just stares at him for HOURS like he's watching a really good telenovela. Nacho wakes up and screams everytime.

Also if you get 1-2 hours of sleep every fucking night you'll start hallucinating and could experience microsleeps😭😭 I IMAGINE LALO IN THE MIDDLE OF A SHOOTOUT AND HE JUST PASSES OUT Nacho prays that his heart is giving out but he always wakes back up and has no clue what just happened to him

Nacho, the muscular god of muscle, likes Lalo's extra chub leave me alone.. he also isn't one to get jealous because of his past poly relationships but Lalo definitely does. It annoys the hell out of Nacho because anytime a guy even breathes in his direction Lalo starts bear hugging him and loading his gun😭 but because of that it kind of rubs off on him and whenever a guy talks to Lalo he gets a little bitter in spite of himself😔😔

GUSMAX GUSMAZXXX I don't have a lot of headcanons for them bc im not creative but I know for a FACT Gus has a photo album of Max somewhere but he keeps it hidden deep deep in the depths of his house

Also I like imagining on a stressful day Gus talks to him, for example "for the love of god Max save me" yk small stuff like that AND they loved cooking together i know it (I like to think their relationship was less words of affirmation based and more quality time based just bc i cant picture Gustavo Fring saying "I love you" it scares me😭😭)

AND CAN YOU IMAGINE FOR ONE MOMENT WHAT THE CARTEL WOULD LOOK LIKE IF HECTOR HADN'T SHOT MAX IN THE HEAD. Bcs (and brba) wouldn't be HALF as long and DAMN the power couple potential

hiii i love the way u write lacho!! do u have any hcs for lalo liking that nacho is shorter than him??

Lalo loves the height difference because it offers great opportunities for trolling. He likes to put things out of reach so that Nacho either has to ask for his help or use a chair/his parkour skills to get to the top shelves, which is always fun to watch. He also likes being able to rest his chin on Nacho's head when he's holding him

@lastsona and I have Thoughts about the lacho fankid and right now an hc dear to my heart is lalo helping him with his math homework

Lalo Salamanca

ty ❤ Sexuality Headcanon: gay and not exactly hiding it, it’s just sort of an open but unspoken “secret” in the cartel. Gender Headcanon: not set on anything and open for all kinds of hcs! A ship I have with said character: Lacho nation ❤ A BROTP I have with said character: Lalo/his family, I especially love his close, loving relationship to Hector and I’d kill for Lalo interacting with the cousins! They’re good boys. A NOTP I have with said character: Lalo/Kim really isn’t me cup of tea. A random headcanon: Lalo used to smoke at least half a pack of cigarettes a day in his 20s but broke the habit eventually, that’s one of the reasons he has the habit of eating snacks. General Opinion over said character: Lalo is the best thing to come out of season 5, and I adore him so much he made it able to overlook a lot of grievances I have with season 5. He’s tons of fun and the kind of character that’ll stay with me! Gonna answer your other ask for Nacho Varga here, too: Sexuality Headcanon: gay or bi, both is good. Gender Headcanon: trans man Nacho is dear to my heart. A ship I have with said character: Lacho, of course! But to change things up: Nacho/all the Salamancas. Also Nacho/Domingo. A BROTP I have with said character: Again, him and Domingo. I also love the weird relationship he has with Amber and Jo, though it probably doesn’t count as BroTP. Same goes for his difficult relationship to his father. A NOTP I have with said character: Nothing, really? Closest thing I can think of is that I really don’t see why people think Nacho and Jesse would be friends. A random headcanon: Nacho used to fool around with Domingo when they were younger, but remained oblivious to the fact that he’s actually into Domingo for probably most of his life. General Opinion over said character: I saw his beautiful soulful anime eyes and I was done for. Also his tiddies. Love me a cocky bastard, and I’m a bit sad he’s not allowed to be that anymore, but I also love prideful and vain characters and people digging their own graves. Blood looks great on him!

I'm gonna jump in here super quick and hope I'm the first person to ask for Lalo!! :D

Thank you @krokorobin !!!

Lalo

Sexuality Headcanon: gay! Maybe bi too but I only see him with a woman who would be just as crazy and dangerous as him. That would explain why there is no one at his home, she's working 24/7 at Salamanca headquarters or smth haha

Gender Headcanon: as much as I want to hc every character non-binary, I would say he's a cismaaaan???.... on thin ice??? Although trans Lalo sounds rad as hell!

A ship I have with said character: Lacho #1, obvs, but I really really enjoy Lalo/Gus. They have the opposite energies and can annoy each other to death which is a perfect ship dynamic. Lalo/Jimmy is pretty sexy but I wouldn't read anything angsty with this ship. I also want to say Lalo/Howard but I'm having a hard time picturing how these two would meet shsgsh

A BROTP I have with said character: Lalo and the cousins!!! Would die to see their interactions on the screen omgggg!!!!!

A NOTP I have with said character: Lalo/Kim?.. don't see it really? 🤔

A random headcanon: I know he was lying about his sleep schedule, I just know it. Two-three hours my ass. Mf was just trying to impress Nacho (??? how old are you, 12??), and get some attention from him.

General Opinion over said character: When I saw Lalo first, I was like "how many of these Salamancas do you have wtf", and was generally dissapointed that it wasn't a woman! We have enough men in the show! But then he charmed me really fast, and now I can't wait to see what's gonna happen to him next. He's a lot of fun, his scenes are always very dynamic and interesting, and he's VERY scary. I love him.

Lalo!

💙

what they smell like: definitely some expensive cologne, maybe an assortment of spices if he’s been cooking recently, maybe a little bit of gasoline, maybe like an old house.

what their favorite smells in the world are: the smell of his horses

what pajamas they wear/what they wear to sleep in: 

my favorite ship (if applicable) and a cute hc about them: obviously lacho. nacho will oftentimes try to stay up as late as lalo, but whenever he does he’ll fall asleep first and lalo will end up caring him to bed.

my favorite friendship (if applicable) and a cute hc about them: i like to think that kim was right, he’s bad at crime and has no friends. at least no real ones anyways. but he doesn’t really care. His job necessitates long drives all on his own, and he enjoys passing the time talking to himself. he lives in his only little world and he likes that just fine. letting someone else into it might ruin everything.

a song that reminds me of them: rid of me by pj harvey

what animal i think they would be if they were an animal: a horrendous little stray cat that acts like it lives with you and tears up you furniture and always demands your attention at the worst times

what position they sleep in: on his back and snoring like a boar

their favorite drink: they were drinking cognac in the finale and honestly i think that’s the perfect drink for a rich homosexual maniac like lalo. (i happen to also like brandy, so . . .)

a gift i would give them if i could: not to be crass, but one of those scary sex robots, because he has been so deeply betrayed that never again will he be able to stomach any real human intimacy. a sex robot won’t rat on him to fring, that’s all i’m saying. 

Don't mind me, just thinking about t4t with Nacho while Lalo strokes his cock in the corner🫣

-🛢

remember how i said i was gonna continue the poly lacho thing >:3

maybe one day ill compile this into a full fic 🥱

warning: squirting

anatomical terms: dick, cunt/hole

"Let me help."

Nacho's voice was gentle, soothing, and his touch even more so, calloused fingers stroking your most sensitive spot. Your dick was aching for some stimulation. Lalo hadn't touched it the whole time. Sure, he was planning on it. He was planning on giving you what you wanted, but not until he got what he wanted. He wanted to edge you. He wanted to see how much pressure you could take until you burst. He wanted full control of you. He wanted your complete, unwavering submission.

That's why when Nacho decided to quite literally take matters into his own hands, you panicked.

"W-Wait, wait... What if... What if he comes back?!" You asked in a frantic, hushed tone.

"So what if he does?" Nacho replied in the same register, albeit with a lot more confidence. "Let him watch. Maybe then he'll figure out that he shouldn't just take advantage of you like that."

You tried to defend your partner since he wasn't there to defend himself. "He- ngh... He doesn't... I... I like it..."

But Nacho wasn't hearing it. "I know. But I don't think it's right for him to just walk away without making sure you're taken care of. Especially if he makes you cry like that. Plus, if I can get you off before he comes back, he's not gonna know, right?" He jerked his wrist fast enough to make your legs shake.

You threw your head back against his shoulder and whined. "He's gonna-ahh... He's gonna know..."

Nacho scoffed. "Yeah? Why's that?"

If he kept going like that, he was sure to find out for himself. You decided to tell him rather than show him. “Cause... Cause I... When I c-cum, I… I squirt... a lot..."

Nacho chuckled, unrelenting in his movements. "Oh yeah? That's cute. Yeah, I believe it. You're soaking wet right now. Is that why he doesn't get you off? Does he not like it?"

"N-No, he..." You hissed in pleasure as more incriminating evidence seeped out of you, "He does... He does, it's just-ah! Fu-mm!" Nacho slipped his fingers inside you and slapped his hand over your mouth when you started to get loud.

"Shut. Up." He growled, "Are you trying to get caught? Be quiet or I'll have to stop."

You panted, hot puffs of heavy air hitting his palm as he fingered your needy hole and stroked your dick with his thumb. Nacho must have had a lot of experience. He seemed to know exactly where to press, exactly how hard, and exactly how fast. Your orgasm was bubbling over, and you gripped his bicep to try to warn him.

Nacho smiled and whispered in your ear. "You don't have to ask. Just let it out."

And so you did. Your nails dug into Nacho's muscle as your cunt sprayed his fingers, soaking the sheets and leaving a wet spot that Lalo was sure to notice. When you were done, you slumped back against Nacho’s chest. He didn’t even have time to take his hands off you before a noise startled you both:

Clapping.

Two pairs of guilty eyes followed the source of the sound, and they saw Lalo, standing in the doorway, with three bottles of water tucked under his arm, clapping.

“Bravo, you two!” He laughed as he made his way into the bedroom. “Gotta say, you both put on a great show. Practically got me ready for another round, already.”

You and Nacho stared at him blankly, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Nacho was the one to speak up. “You’re, uh… You’re not mad?”

“Why would I be?” Lalo asked as he pulled up a chair in front of his own bed. “In fact…” He untied the string around his robe and let it fall open, draping over the sides of his sculpted body. He gripped his re-hardened cock and gave it a slow pump, intending to entice you both.

“Keep going.”

Why I am so obsessed with the relationship between Subaru Sumeragi and Seishiro Sakurazuka and draw lacho so much with reference from this dudes? The answer is cause man their relationship is mf complex 🚬

Subaru Sumeragi is the next Onmyoji in the Sumeragi clan and Seishiro Sakurazuka is the head of the Sakurazuka clan after killing his mother ( the only way to be head of that clan is killing the last leader ) . Seishiro was tasked to kill Subaru as a kid but him being the wildcard sociopath that he is and impressed by Subaru’s purity decides to play a game instead , they will meet again in the future and if he manages to have feelings for Subaru he will spare him his life .

Now here is a warning cause CLAMP just loves to pair teens with young adults sometimes ( and like this is actually more healthy than Sakura’s teacher and her friend of like 12 years old being engaged or something ) and they meet again , Subaru is 16 and Seishiro is 25 posing as a veterinarian, this is where the events of Tokyo Babylon take place which involve a lot of magic , and homoerotic moments like this.

Seishiro always tells Subaru he loves him or protects him , even loses an eye for him , and all is gay and dandy until Subaru realizes he loves him too and then Seishiro reveals himself as the head of the Sakurazuka and tries to kill him ( totally Seishiro logic)

Now I forgot to mention but Subaru has an older twin sister named Hokuto who loves Subaru dearly and makes a deal with Seishiro to take her life instead of Subaru’s , he agrees and kills her BUT before Hokuto dies she casts a spell who’s purpose is known later , during the events of X-1999, Subaru is emotionally destroyed by this cause he lost two of the most important people of his life at the same mf time

Years pass and now we are in 1999 and the apocalypse is coming , Subaru is 25 and Seishiro is 34 , Subaru returns to Tokyo to fight as a dragon of heaven ( they choose to protect humanity ) and Seishiro is chosen to be a dragon of earth ( they choose to save the earth ) , Subaru hates Seishiro and has wanted revenge against him for the death of his sister but still we got all this sexual tension

To sum things up they have their last fight and Seishiro tries to pierce Subaru’s heart with the same technique he used to kill her sister and that’s when we know what Hokuto’s spells was , she wished for her brother to not die the same way she did so , Seishiro did not in fact pierced Subaru’s heart but his own , killing himself , and this was something that Seishiro KNEW all along but still he wished to die by Subaru’s hand .

Like this is love / hate / rivalry /obsession/ sacrifice/ Subaru and Seishiro are parallels the same way as Nacho and Lalo and I just looove to mix things I love and think they match together

love LOVE your hc and metas. I'm so very new to bcs and lacho and it's been a treat finding a fanbase that is that normal about Them

Aw, thanks! 💕 And welcome! I'm not sure i'd call us normal though lol