#kindergarten mafia
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Regarding the issues surrounding the Kindergarten Mafia discord server, a large fandom server mostly dedicated to the kinnporsche fandom. It is an issue that encompasses multiple events and many other people have been hurt who I do not want to speak for, so this will not be the full picture, just a part of my part. If anyone reads this and has questions, they can reach out to me.
I am Will/Logan, also known as Sweet-William in fanfic circles, and I am not making this post because I have a vendetta, or to be malicious, as some of my previous actions have been called by the moderators of the server. I am making it because I have the right to speak on my experiences (as others I hope will speak up and share theirs, now that they know they are not alone), and because I want to warn people so what happened to me does not happen to them.
I am also making this post because @accal1a aka Hann the admin of the server has refused to delete content created by myself and many of my friends from the server, all of who left because they like me felt unsafe. The original request was sent by proxy as Hann has me blocked, and though they said they would unblock me so we could discuss it, they never did. As a writer I take it seriously when my work, and also details of my personal life, are taken. When I even offered to go through and delete it all myself if temporarily given access to the server, my messages were completely ignored.
The server is not a safe place for people of colour. It is not a place safe from racism, or xenophobia, and its leadership has historically been and continues to this day, to perpetuate racism in fandom spaces and shelter people who have hurt others with no real repercussions, accountability, or transparency.
The original issue was the result of this conversation between myself and Rachael, one of the moderators. I earlier stepped into a conversation where several microaggressions occurred regarding native american culture. As a Native, it was my right to speak up.
After this conversation I was urged to bring the issue directly to Hann, and from there the issues spiralled out of control. Hann originally was very supportive, and we became what I thought to be close friends. They made many reassurances Rachael would be held accountable, and changes would be made to the server to make it a safer place for pocs.
Rachael was never actually held accountable. Even when it came to light she had messaged me to issue the warning while lying to the rest of the mod team that she had "checked in on me" to see if I was alright after the incident. This was not the only time she secretly issued warnings to people, usually to defend her friends.
She was "demoted" but in actuality, the entire mod team was restructured and she simply was not on the top rung. Over the next two months many things happened, most of which are not my story to tell, and then it came to light Rachael had even further lied and never issued any warning or otherwise spoke to the person originally being racist in a mod capacity, this person being her friend, and refused to show what messages she did actially send.
To avoid any punishment she tried to "step down" as a mod before a choice could be made. And this was allowed. She was allowed to step down and continue to be in the server with no one knowing the actual story or that she couldn't be trusted and had abused her position.
After an incredibly vague statement was posted by the mod team regarding Rachael no longer being a mod, I broke and posted the conversation publicly and laid out the actual events. This was met with an overwhelming negative backlash, where it became clear to me this was a community where I was not safe, and any poc speaking up and calling for accountability would be seen as malicious and rocking the boat unnecessarily, while the moderators just watched on in silence.
The few moderators who were advocating for the poc server members were promptly fired, and though at one point a timeline vaguely outlining the events was posted, it and all evidence of what happened to me has since been deleted. And while Rachael originally left saying I was obviously trying to run her off the server, she has already returned at the urging of Hann.
Protecting people of colour and standing up to racism and xenophobia was never a priority in the kingergarten mafia server. And now that Hann has escalated to stealing work from people of colour that they have absolutely no right to, I am speaking up.
Respect us, be an ally, or face the consequences of what your community looks like with us gone.
#kinnporsche fandom#kinnporsche the series#kinnporsche#kimchay#vegaspete#discord#ao3#fanfic#personal#long post#kindergarten mafia
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Leaving Kindergarten Mafia
There have already been a few posts floating around about the Discord server implosion of Kindergarten Mafia. They do a great job of outlining the events that happened, with documentation, directly from the folks who were harmed by the server owner (Hann) and mods that helped enable their racism. (Snake and Mouse, Jinx1, Jinx2, mousydentist, Faye, among others.)
So I'm not going to do that.
These are my own thoughts on the specific racism and tenets of white supremacy that I observed in the server as well as a general commentary on joining fandom spaces.
Rarely do I emphasize my age but it's relevant so here we are : I am 35 years old this year and Kindergarten Mafia was part of my first baby steps into any fandom. Ironically, my hesitation to join fandom ended up being proven because I had heard, for a very long time, that fandom spaces were dominated by racism and a failure to acknowledge POC fans. For a long time, I was complacent and felt "safe" in that server of 300+ folks.
Until one Native member spoke up about the usage of "spirit animal" as appropriative and the cracks in the foundations began to show themselves to everyone and not just the people with marginalized identities.
I had already started to feel uncomfortable in how the server dealt with ableism. There was also a member who I've previously called out on Tumblr, for usage of the m*dget slur in their story, and who became extremely vocal recently. (Spoiler alert - they wrote an entire essay excusing their usage of it, multiple times in the fic, because they couldn't be creative or bothered enough to come up with an alternative for a "short person".)
Without further ado, let's get into it. These are all from the link above, "tenets of white supremacy in organizations" (and yes, a Discord server of 300+ people absolutely DOES count as an organization).
1. Sense of Urgency, such as prioritizing quick or highly visible results that can exclude potential allies.
-> In the server, both server owner and problematic mods continued to emphasize that their "missteps" (i.e. racism) was due to needing to seek a solution ASAP for the good of the server.
2. Worshipping the Written Word, such as valuing strong documentation and writing skills.
-> Rebuttals to POC/marginalized folks were constantly full of dictionary definitions, copied over.
3. Believing in Only One Right Way, such as concluding something is wrong with people who refuse to adapt or change.
-> POC members and allies were banned when anger was expressed because OUR anger suddenly made it an "unsafe" space for the server owner and problematic mods.
4. Paternalism, such as decision-making processes that are only understood by those with power and unclear to those without it.
-> Despite multiple server users disagreeing with the server owner's tactics (including the co-owner, who stepped down), Hann continued to defend + make decisions.
5. Defensiveness, such as spending energy trying to protect power or defend against charges of racism.
-> There's too many examples to cite here. But in the end, it was claimed that the initial problem was solved. And then the problem mod was invited back. With additional defense of why.
6. Power Hoarding, such as feeling threatened when anyone suggests organizational changes.
-> Instead of wanting to listen to marginalized identities, the server was threatened with a shut-down. Multiple people stepped up to take over as server owner. But power hoarding was more important so not only was the server shut down... it was resurrected from the dead to include their favorite (white) people. This leads us to...
7. Believing I’m the Only One, such as thinking that if something is going to get done right, then ‘I’ have to do it.
8. Fear of Open Conflict, such as equating the raising of difficult issues with being rude or impolite.
-> The initial issue around the problematic phrase was ridiculously hush hush. POC members were banned for their (rightfully so) angry remarks.
9. Believing in Objectivity, such as considering emotions to be irrational and destructive to decision-making.
-> Not just the server owner but the people who rushed to defend them and the problematic mods, claimed to be impartial and objective, based on their queer identities or other things. As humans, none of us can actually be objective and all of us are a little racist because racism is a systemic problem that we were raised under.
10. Claiming a Right to Comfort, such as scapegoating those who cause emotional or psychological discomfort.
-> In the end, it was clear that only whiteness was valued when POC folks + allies were banned or made to feel uncomfortable enough to leave (such as myself).
I know I've only posted my thoughts/feelings vs documentation (which, you shouldn't always demand because see above for "worshipping the written word") but if this screenshot of the new rules for the new server doesn't convince you that something (racism/cult-ism) is wrong with these folks... I don't know what will.
TL;DR - Ownership and modding of a large Discord server doesn't make you a god. You are, unfortunately, still a puny mortal with the biases that come along with being as such. I'm sure it was a fun power trip for those involved but I am happy to expose the rotting underbelly in a way that I see fit.
In conclusion, I leave you with further reading that will help decolonize your mindset and has done a much better job at showing that the problems with the Kindergarten Mafia are not unique (as they claimed). It is one that those of us with marginalized identities face constantly and we are fucking tired of running into this and being treated in a way that emphasizes the problem with our existence in real life. Intersectionality and decolonization is what will actually liberate us, and without both, online spaces are simply the same reflections of real life.
At the very least, I hope it gives some of you food for thought.
(I will also post my Scathing Letter™ that was my last message in the server as a separate post because I am wordy AF and this is already too long.)
[1/26/2024 update] Now with part 2 because apparently I had more things to say.
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before we get into what happened in the kindergarten mafia discord, i want to make sure that this post doesn't end with people critcising the ethics of taking and using screenshots of private conversations.
if you are needling someone over the ethics of screenshots, please remember that the focus of this conversation is about racism and a two month long cover up from a mod plus a lot of questionable behaviours from the admin team.
this post might jump around a lot in the timeline but in order to be as concise as possible i am going to share the original screenshots of the timeline from the server admin themselves.
as you can see from this timeline, this is not an isolated event. this is a continuing pattern that has been going on a long time during which whenever will entered the server he was greeted by those who were lying to him about the progress that was being made. now to start my recollection of events.
7th October
someone used the phrase 'spirit animal' in an incorrect context and was graciously told by tay, a member of the server, that it was not oaky. isak came in with 'a joke' (jokes are funny and do not harm cultures, this is not a joke but for the statement i am using their terminology). isak was 'modded' by rachael who equivicated native culture to a religion which is further offending native cultures and practices.
will, who is native, came in and made a short statement defending his culture. he was not rude, he was not offending other people, he was clearly stating that his culture is not a joke.
after this statement will did not re-enter creative chat or the server to talk about anything. however, rachael swiftly came into his inbox and modded him about his behaviour stating that he was 'almost mini-modding' and that was against server rules. this was done without the knowledge of other mods.
you can see those screenshots in will's post and draw your own conclusions. you can also see the apology rachael sent.
Between the 7th and 26th of October
A lot of conversations happened between Hann and Corvus during this time that I was not privvy to as I was just a mod at the time.
26th October
during the mod meeting we had, rachael made it clear that she had modded isak in an official capacity for his comments about native culture. the other party involved had also been modded in an official capacity and made the mistake out of ignorance - they then took the time to educate themselves.
during the meeting, mods faye and morgan pushed for a statement about racist behaviour in the server. highlighting the important of educating ourselves to protect members of our community.
it was also decided that a poc mod would be bought onto the team because 5 white people are not fully equiped to handle the topic of racism.
Between 26th October and 4th December
during this period, not much hapapened to my knowledge. we continued general modding of the server which included an uncomfortable topic of xenophobic actions and fetishisation within the server. the task of handling this conversation was given to the poc mod. immediately they were talked over by the server member and the server member went straight to the admin - invalidating the poc mod and further proving that there is an inherent problem regarding views of poc in the server.
4th of December
on the 4th of december, mod faye bought it to everyones attention in the mod chat that rachael had not done what she said she would regarding adding the conversation where she 'modded' isak for his comment. she was given 6 weeks to do this and hadn't done it.
the following conversation happened - please be aware the timestamps are different because these screenshots have been gathered from multiple sources.
6th December
a statement was released talking about how rachael had left the mod team. originally it contained the phrase 'stepped down from the mod team'. faye and i pushed for this to be changed because 'stepped down' makes it seem like she left for honest reasons. in reality she left before she could be fired.
we always wanted to have an announcement about her no longer being a mod that included a brief explaination of why she was no longer a mod and a second anouncement about racism within the server.
san shared concerns that people of colour were not being listened to in the server and was immediately pushed back against with an admin asking why people are sharing information. i sent a private message of my concerns to hann and they asked for clarification so this is what i said
after this hann and corvus talked and decided to take some time to rest as it was a stressful experience for them. during that time communication from me was limited as i was in hospital - it is not necessary to know the reasons, just that i had to prioritise what i spent my limited time doing.
faye was amazing during this time and came up with a step by step plan for the mods to follow.
7th of December
after having enough of placations and pleasentries, will dropped his account of what happened into the server. he put it in four threads, all of which were relevent to the situation.
he did this without telling anyone.
this is rachael's immediate response to the statements.
immediately she is trying to get the statement deleted on a technicality. i was the only mod awake at that time because of timezone issues. it was not fun. i refused to delete the statements that will made because i was not going to be complicit in covering up what happened. i refused to silence the voice of a native man who's culture had been the butt of some 'joke'.
concurrent to rachael leaving, the clarifications channel was on fire. people were immediately running to attack will for what he had done. calling on him to be banned and asking him to 'prove' what happened to him.
during this time the original person who made a joke admitted that he knew it was a racist joke but he did it anyway. he was still never modded for this behaviour and considering one of the rules is don't be racist, you'd think the mods would've banned him after this but no.
me and faye worked overtime in that thread. consistently fielding questions about 'what do poc want?', 'why isn't will here explaining himself?', and 'what is going to happen next.' i devoted the limited time i had in hospital to answering the questions in the clarifications channel. this meant i was less active in mod chat and i explained this situation to the admins/other mods at the time.
me and faye gave action plan after action plan, we wrote and provided statements, we fed back on what people of colour were saying both in the server and in our dms. it was exhausting but we btoh did it because we wanted the server to be a safe space for everyone.
so imagine our suprise when we were promptly fired for our actions. on. fayes. birthday.
faye was removed from mod chat after this but i remained a little longer. (image has some redacted personal information)
we were fired for listening to poc voices and trying to highlight the systemic issues within the server.
i can't add anymore images but this issue was reignited a few days ago. in response to innocent questions, a mod started cruelly talking to a black member of the community, telling them how much they were disliked. they followed by banning her. they also refused to delete their work within the server. same with will. given how much hann preaches about content theft - it's ironic that they keep ideas that aren't theirs.
i entered into the conversation again because i am in a position of privlege with my whiteness. i fielded questions about will and jynx and 'how accusing someone of racism is worse than being racist'. following this my friends and i were also banned from the server.
the server was eventually put on read only but not until after the mods had a lovely joking session about banning us with the server members. hann said she apologised to the server members for their 'gallows humour' when joking about the banned people.
this is a little reminder that gallows humour is for those at the gallows. when you're in the audience, you're just laughing at a dying person.
hann never apologised to us but hann & alex did have more fun vagueposting about us on tumblr and making memes about purging members. all while there is still no response to the racism that happened in the server that they were complicit in.
following the closure of the server, hann created a new server with cult like rules which i'm sure you have seen floating around.
i was not innocent in all this mess. at first i was complicit in wanted to keep a calm, steady ship. then i was educated by some truly wonderful people in the fandom that sweeping things under the rug just leaves more room for hostility to grow. from then i changed my views and started advocating for firmer stances on racism within the fandom space. that idea wasn't received well.
tldr; racism in fandom spaces spreads further than you think. the amount of bias that people unwillingly show is intense. i was fired as a mod for supporting poc.
#morgan talks#this was longer than intended#kindergarten mafia#this is my last say on the matter i think
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HE POPPED A BALLOON WITH HIS ASS AND THEN PRETENDED HE GOT SCARED SHJDJLK
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build: we won’t tell each other lies
also build the very next moment: lies
#vegaspete#kinnporsche#kinnporsche the series#vegas theerapanyakul#pete phongsakorn#biblebuild#build jakapan puttha#jeff satur#kindergarten mafia#be on cloud#why so cute#and damn his fit is gorgeous
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Who wears tank top when you go shooting the Mafia?
Kim Theerapanyakul that's who.
#kim theerapanyakul#kimchay#kinnporsche#kinnporche the series#ha ha ha#i swear#kindergarten mafia#i love them
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The cast at the airport via BeOnCloud’s ig story
#Kindergarten mafia#this looks like a school trip#it’s so funny#like these are adults in their 20s - 30s but they’re all actually 5#mile phakphum#jeff satur#apo nattawin#barcode tinnasit#perth nakhun#bible wichapas#build jakapan#job yosatorn#ping touchchavit#pong pongsakorn#us nititorn#tong thanayut#nodt nutthasid#jj khunchalach#ta nannakun#Kinnporsche cast
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At some point, I'll spell out my thoughts and feelings about recent events in the Kindergarten Mafia Discord server.
But right now, there is too much in limbo that a lot of other fans are caught up in, and I don't intend to rock any boats until all the passengers are off it.
Then I'll be happy to sink the boat.
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They really get SILLY!
The Kindergarten Mafia
KinnPorsche World Tour
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Kindergarten Mafia server faked its death? How? Sorry I'm not in the server and I only know outside accounts of it so I'm just a little confused.
Not my screenshots, obviously I am no longer welcome in this space, but basically this announcement was posted (which contains just. So many lies and misinterpretation of the course of events it would take a long time to list them all out), followed by invites being sent out to select people proving the server would still really live on, and apparently Hann also posted this not at all concerning set of rules that CERTAINLY looks like someone who intends to go forward promoting acceptance, accountability, transparency around community issues, and certainly won't continue to drive out any vocal pocs or people advocating for them.
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Departure letter
As mentioned in this post, that outlines why I needed to let this be my last message in the Kindergarten Mafia Discord server... here is the Scathing Letter™.
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It is time for me to go.
I absolutely loathe having to do a departure announcement because this is not an airport and I’m sure not a lot of people care.
But as someone who has spent 10+ years of their life actively decolonizing and liberating my viewpoints, it would be absolutely remiss for me to not leave final remarks here expressing my utter disappointment and feelings of not being safe in this space. Not just as POC but someone chronically ill and autistic. Y’all have not made it kind for someone who has any sort of marginalized identity, as evidenced by the public dogpiling in this thread as well as the now deleted messages in clarifications.
I’m not going to address the majority of the drama except for what started it all : someone refusing a Native person’s (well-deserved) call out for a culturally appropriative phrase.
It is devastatingly clear to me that a large portion of folks in this server have a poorly curated personal life extremely lacking in diversity.
The defensiveness and elitism (really? Dictionary definitions?). Refusal to actively listen and instead attack others about lacking critical thinking. Self-claimed expertise. I could go on.
So I revise what I had posted previously. Everyone is a little racist and this server is full of white supremacy tenets.
https://rrapp.hks.harvard.edu/the-culture-of-white-supremacy-in-organizations/
This is my last attempt at educating some of you, which will go poorly, I’m sure.
I spent an inordinate amount of time/energy/spoons to provide coherent context the last time but to find the entire thread deleted with no respect for the effort I spent there, has been one of the final straws.
Frequently mentioning your volunteer status is frankly laughable. I have volunteered for quite a few places, including mutual aid organizations, and across multiple timezones and never have I seen so many excuses to say that y’all do not care about POC. (1/2)
I don’t care how old anyone is, what their job IRL is, what works you’ve posted with how many kudos, etc. I *do* care about the fact that multiple people, when speaking up, are treated with callousness and hurtfulness. That is a larger indication of your mental age and capacity than any other words you can type.
That I felt safe enough to be so vulnerable in this space for a while was an illusion. There are continued indicators that POC words are ignored, especially calling out that I know both Jynx and William have requested their labor be deleted in the server but have not been.
Last, but not least, I’m sure people will read this and think oh it’s Phoenix banding together with their friends. I say this with as much passion I can muster : I would have the same amount of disdain for the actions seen in this server without any personal friendship ties and emotions. That is how the social justice aspect of my autism works.
You all have so much work to do when it comes to respecting other human beings that have different experiences than you. If I weren’t so consumed with the feelings of my actual divorce, recent termination, and the continued trauma of world events like that in Falasteen, I’d feel bad for you.
As it stands, I believe my energy is precious and I simply cannot spare any more in spaces where I (and others) am not welcome or given respect to. Let it be noted that I’ve actually gone viral on social media before and I still have not left THOSE spaces and yet am choosing to leave this one. The troll comments I received on Tiktok can be ignored because they are from complete strangers that I do not give a single fuck about. The ones here, purportedly from those who claim it’s “safe”, are even more insidious in nature.
Whatever race or ethnicity you are, to take people who have shown you their vulnerabilities and turn around to show your entire behinds in the least sexiest way ever, is not a good look. Ever.
Leave the ass scenes to KinnPorsche.
#announcing my departure#it's not an airport#but i'm taking flight#bye racists#good riddance#kindergarten mafia#decolonize fandom spaces
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they are a pair, do not separate
#kinnporsche chan#kinnporsche: the series#chan kinnporsche#kinnporsche the series#kinnporsche#kinnporche the series#kinnporsche big#big kinnporsche#my art#my emotes#slowly making emotes for the kindergarten mafia server#Takiimikiku emote bases
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Don't mind me if you don't want to clarify. What exactly happened in the kindergarten mafia server? I've already read snake-and-mouse's/will's post and from what I gathered there was an instance of racism. But what exactly happened? Did someone casually say a slur or deleted chats from someone attempting to explain a cultural context?
thank you for asking anon. i'll tell my part of the story but a lot of it is already out there. will's posts are very comprehensive, and jynx offers their insight here and here. those are the stories of poc who were involved in the situation. there is also an excellent post that danny made to share the repercussions on his statement in the km server. vena made some truly wonderful talking points here too
separate to this phoenix has made an insightful post about the tenents of white supremacy and how they infiltraited the km discord and it's successors.
because i can't do a 'read more' in response to an ask, i'll link you to my post on the matter here.
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TONG FEELING EXTREMELY SINGLE IN THIS MOMENT
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I was asked to be a mod on favourite place on the internet today (the Kindergarten Mafia Kinnporsche 21+ discord) (come join us it's a wonderfully unhinged house of madness)
I'm so happy 🥲🥺
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