Scamming the scammer
John Constantine was the biggest headache Danny had managed to get, ever. After becoming King he did not think that his first task would be to solve the man's soul problems.
And it seemed quite incredible to him that the hellbazer would consider selling his soul as if it were a used car that he wants to get rid of to buy a new one. He was aware that he needed a soul, wasn't he? That it was not possible to buy a new one? Because he didn't want to be the one to inform him if that was not the case.
To top it off, beings from different domains within his kingdom came explicitly to claim the British's soul, which didn't even make sense, there were thousands of souls! Why did everyone want the same one? And why did he have to be the one to take care of it?
Completely frustrated, he placed all the paperwork for John Constantine in an empty room and locked the door. He smiled as he came up with a plan to improve the situation, it might be worth it.
That's how a drunk John Constantine found himself signing a dubious contract in exchange for the power to turn any liquid into beer, he didn't bother to read the contract, most demons just wanted his soul and this guy looked so human, with a presence so light it must be a minor demon for sure.
This turned out to be a bad decision when the next morning he found himself trapped in a room full of documents, the door locked. Taped to the door was a green note that said "Enjoy doing your own paperwork sir, I hope you're pleased with yourself", and well, maybe he should have read that contract after all.
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tiktokers au where ghost and soap (who did not know each other prior) accidentally start a whole saga of stitching one another to pester the other about whatever topic (the subject that sparked this feud has been long forgotten). but it eventually evolves into a weird kind of flirting that everyone is waiting on seeing how it develops by the next video posted. there’s even vague and direct posts made by outsiders covering what’s going on and hoping for what comes next.
this goes on for maybe a year when one day, after maybe a week of silence from them both, they post a video together on valentine’s day to announce their relationship (that wouldn’t stop the feud from continuing, however).
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In which Price makes you show him just how eager you are to fuck him | 18+, MDNI
Content tags: dom!price, sub!male reader, thigh fucking, ftm!price
A/N: as requested by bro anon, sorry I accidentally deleted your ask!
Price is sprawled out on his back, legs propped up in the air while you got your cock slotted between his thighs and thrusting in between them.
You quickly set a steady pace, allowing yourself to lose yourself in pleasure as you take in the way his soft skin feels squeezing around your dick, the way his stomach and thighs jiggle with every thrust of your hips, and the way the dark hair on his thighs and abdomen is getting smeared with your precum.
“So good for me, doing so well” Price grunts out, hand digging into your shoulders as he keeps his thighs locked in place.
It almost feels like a dream, body and mind feeling so afloat but then there’s Price’s blunt nails sinking into your skin, the smell of his cologne and cigar smoke and the bed squeaking loudly, reminding you that this is very much reality.
“Feels good hm? “He asks as his hand cups your cheek, thumb gently stroking it.
You bite your lip, and furiously nod your head as you continue to slide your cock between his legs.
He just hums in content, as he tightens his hold.
Although his hair is tousled, cheeks flushed, and practically dripping from his cunt, he looks like he’s got all the time in the world, in no rush to get himself off.
For a brief moment you take a proper look at mess you made between his legs, feeling slightly embarrassed by it only to feel his fingers grab ahold of your chin, tiling your head up to meet his gaze “don’t worry about it” he coos as he shakes his head “just finish for me”
“Come on love, show me how much you want me,”
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Watson could've just said that he last saw Hayter when he was injured but had to add in the most unnecessarily gruesome details known to man 😭
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Gaz saw Ghost’s dick before Soap and Soap is LIVID over this. This man being absolutely pissed that his best friend saw his boyfriend’s dick before him and just tormenting him over it. Gaz gets himself a donut and Soap just snatches it off his plate and shoves it in his mouth before leaving. Soap playing loud, obnoxious music outside Gaz’s room and only stops when someone physically removes him from the area. If Soap is told to relay information to Gaz he will leave out a itty bitty fact that so happens to be very important.
They get into a physical fight over Soap’s pettiness and have to be separated. Then after Soap finally sleeps with Ghost he’s over it. Gaz decides to just leave it be because throwing pettiness back at Soap would only result in ruin. Besides… It’s not like he has an entire sketchbook dedicated to Soap worshipping Ghost way before they even started dating. And it’s not like he’s going to send pictures of the pages to both Ghost and Soap under an pen name. He definitely doesn’t plan on digging up the most embarrassing journal entries from Soap’s old journals and send them to him under the same pen name. And Ghost is DEFINITELY NOT in on it.
Oh no, why would he ever do that?
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Arthur going to kiss someone (I have someone in mind but. Keeping it vague so y’all can project) and John using his hand to just.
Cover Arthur’s mouth and not allow it
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so who has Arthur's eyelids? either answer is funny.
1. John does. John is canonically aware and active while Arthur's asleep/unconscious. So who wants to take a shift in the coma ward with the otherwise unresponsive patient whose eyes are open and keep following you around the room?
2. Arthur does. If John pisses him off too much, he can at his discretion say "okay well now NOBODY gets to use the eyes" and close them.
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