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marchsfreakshow · 2 months

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It's A Sin [Jimmy Darling]

Angst. Maybe a good ending.

Dandy stole you. That's what Jimmy thinks anyway. You wanted to take a break, and you left the Freakshow for a while. In that time, Dandy wooed you. You didn't come back. Even if you did, Dandy wouldn't let you.

I'm so sorry for this, I just thought of it and thought it would be good to get back into writing for Jimmy<3

No one's perspective

⊹˚.⋆ ₊꒷ᘏᘏ︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹˚ᗢ₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷

Weeks passed.

Months.

You hadn't come back.

"leave it, Jimmy. Seriously...they would've come back by now." Eve mentioned. But he couldn't. He couldn't just live his life without you to help him and live by his side. Fucking Dandy.

Jimmy sat by the ticket booth, day after day. Not eating, drinking, not even looking back once. Still with a glint of hope in his eyes that you would come back. Back into his arms, and into the Freakshow where you belonged. He held the picture of you in his hands, always. Standing with Elsa and Ma Petite, performing together, smiling the night away. But Dandy just couldn't help himself.

He couldn't stop himself from wooing you with the possibility of a warm meal and a fluffy bed every single night. Being with a man who won't be charmed by other women and was 'normal'. You defended Jimmy at first, saying how he was as normal as you or I. But the baby wasn't having it. He stomped around screaming nothing until he picked you up and threw you in the car. "You're mine now." He seethed. You spat and tugged at the car door. Locked. A shit-eating grin appeared on his face when you realised you couldn't get out.

The drive was silent and awkward. You muttered insults. Dandy ignored. But when you got to the manor, you ran. You ran as far as you could. Away from Dandy.

That's what Jimmy hoped anyway. He hoped you were running. Back towards your home. In reality, you were swooned ever so slightly. You were Dandy's now. Sleeping in a plush, big bed every night with a warm breakfast in bed in the morning. You could live like this forever. Everything you ever wanted, right at your fingertips. Where was your Jimmy in your mind? The last thought in your mind when you fall asleep at night. How he could also be happy like this, but he refuses.

Every single thing about you was missed. It was starting to feel wrong. To love you and miss you so much. Heartache, heartbroken, lost. Desperately waiting and searching for you every morning. Waking up every morning wishing you were still asleep in his arms, missing the way you kissed him so gently, and how Motherly you were with Pepper and Salty. Pepper cried when she realised you were gone. One of the kindest souls, abandoned her, more heartbreak. Jimmy felt guilty for you. He couldn't look them in the eyes anymore. The man spent hours staring at your photos, missing your pretty laugh more day after day.

"I miss them so badly..."

"I know Jimmy. I know. But there's no point sittin' and mopin' around in front of the tent all day. Come eat."

"go away Ma.."

He couldn't bear to look his mother in the eyes. He was betraying everyone, but he wanted nothing more than to see you running towards him on the road, jumping into his safe, protective arms once again, and being back home. She sighed, and just turned away, walking back into the Freakshow tent.

Time passed.

A cold October night.

No one around here, no one there.

Breaths, and slowing down footsteps. A lit-up sign in front of their eyes. 1am. No one behind them, to the right, left or in front of. No car following them quietly. Opening the curtains, they walked in. Radio silence. It felt like they had to walk on air. Everything was the way it was when they left. When they walked out of the door, and out of the freaks' lives. You heard your beloved nickname. "Schön..?" Elsa asked quietly, standing in shock. Whether it was happy or angry shock you didn't know until she rushed to you, a grip around your tired body pulling you up. "Mein gott.. schieße.." German mutters and swears.

"I never shoulda left Elsa. Darl', I'm so sorry.." you whispered into her shoulder, knowing to hold in your tears. Both of you spoke for what felt like hours, and now you were standing by the stage, waiting for Elsa to signal you.

"seriously Elsa? This has to happen now?" You missed his voice. You felt like putty already, but you silently coughed and stood up straight.

"Yes! It cannot wait any longer." Jimmy tiredly chuckled. Oh, how you could be a puddle right now, entranced by him just like you were when you were first introduced to him. Lights cut, you stepped onto the stage with shaky legs and hands, facing the wall. The sudden awareness of lights made. You take a deep, incredibly shaky breath. Jimmy recognised you instantly. He stood up, anger, confusion, and love filling his brain. And in a second, you spun on your heel. Eyes meeting eyes. Seeing the sadness in Jimmy's look made you want to fade into the wall and never address him ever again. He muttered your name as the urge to fall to your knees grew.

"Jimmy.." you muttered back, half smiling. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." You were almost cut off as Jimmy jumped to meet you on the stage, holding your hands tightly.

"Why? Why Dandy? Of all fuckin' people?"

"Because I was selfish." You looked away at the ground, feeling too guilty to ever look in his eyes again. "I was fucking selfish and lacked judgement. This is home." A hug was the last thing you expected as a response, but Jimmy held you tight, what you had craved for the last two months. He sobbed into your shoulder, and everything hit you like a freight truck. Hearing the one you loved to cry, realising how badly you fucked up. It made you burst, gripping the loose fabric on his back.

"Jimmy Darling, darling, I never shoulda left you. I'm sorry for being an asshole."

"My pretty sweetheart.." he muttered, holding your face, both your eyes and his, glassy. And a kiss. One like never before. Desperate hands around his neck, your back, weak knees, small giggles and smiles. Being held by the one who gave you the world despite everything. This felt right.

"I'm so glad Elsa woke me up." He chuckled, resting his forehead on yours.

"I'm glad I came back."

⊹˚.⋆ ₊꒷ᘏᘏ︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹˚ᗢ₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷

Tagging: @taintandviolent @babygorewhore @slvt4jamesmarch

#ahs #evan peters #american horror story #jimmy darling #ahs freakshow #freakshow #jimmy darling x reader #jimmy darling x you #angst with happy ending #angst #ahs imagine #Jimmy Darling angst #evan peters x reader #evan peters x you #x reader #Spotify

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icannot3 · 10 months

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"Drunken Mistakes"

Jimmy darling x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of alcoholism, fighting, slight angst (happy ending tho yippee)

Word count: 1.8k

I saw this little sentence prompt that said, "I can't keep kissing strangers pretending that they're you." So that's what this is based on.

..........................

Some say that you will never heal by going back to what hurt you.

But seeing Jimmy with a woman pressed tightly against him, his lips ravishing her own in such a fervent way made your heart twist. Despite almost a year passing since you'd separated, you still remained devastated. And him? He seemed to have little to no problem simply moving on, as if you meant nothing. You'd heard the sounds that came from his trailer at night, on at least a biweekly basis. He was sloppy, always drunk, it repulsed you in a way to see what he'd become. But perhaps he'd always been this way, and it was your rose-colored glasses that had prevented you from seeing the truth.

His hands were tenderly holding her by the hips, squeezing the skin there. It was dark; you were walking back to your trailer when you'd seen the two entangled in the open valley. You'd seemingly frozen, unable to move and unable to turn away from the scene. You'd missed him, despite everything. You missed when he held you like that and how sweet he was before his mother's death. Sometimes, the moments of bliss from your relationship made you forget about the malignancy. Often, you would wonder about whether leaving him truly was a mistake. You felt that maybe you were just emotional and acted brashly at the time. Your brow furrowed, nose cringing with disgust after you looked back at the day the relationship had ended.

You had been worried sick, unable to find him for hours. Panicked, you'd searched everywhere. Jimmy had recently gotten in trouble with some men married to the women he'd previously catered at Tupperware Parties. He wasn't discovered for his devious system until he stopped servicing the women after getting with you, this act had led them into a storm of petty rage. Some of the women told their husband's that he'd forced himself on them, and as a "freak," he had no means of defending himself against these claims. His deformities made him unbelievable, and punishment if caught would be merciless.

He didn't show up to the diner, where plans between the two of you had been made. It was a celebratory occasion, your birthday. Jimmy had made promises to spoil you with his affections and all of the gifts he could afford. His enthusiasm about the day had you worried about what could have happened that made him unable to attend. Things between you had been turbulent as of late due to both the stress he was under with the law and the death of his mother. You were arguing often; he'd started drinking to cope instead of for enjoyment purposes, and it was making him become an ugly shell of what he once was. As you walked back home, in passing, you looked at his trailer. It was the one place you had not yet checked. Your feet were sore from the heels you'd worn to impress him, the ones he didn't care enough to show up and see on your birthday. You stepped up to the door, opening it abruptly. There he was, laying down and wasted out of his right mind. He looked filthy and hadn't even dressed up to see you. His white tank top was stained with liquor, you could tell by the smell.

Something in you had snapped in that moment. Your yelling and sharp slam of the door had woken him up. You'd stormed out of the premise, blinded by rage and disappointment. He was following you from behind, immediately on your tail. Jimmy scoffed, arms flying up in the air. "What's the matter with you?" Baffled by his blatant ignorance, you ran your hands through your hair and pulled the soft locs with frustration. You didn't even want to see him, let alone explain his act of unreliability. He continued to follow you, stumbling gracelessly as he did. He was yelling incoherently your way, sentences sounding more like slurred words.

You'd finally turned around, taking a deep breath in an attempt to calm yourself before speaking. "The plans, Jimmy. Remember? It seems that drinking like a slob is more important than my birthday." Your words were laced with venom, tears beginning to blind you. You closed your eyes, refusing to let any fall. He got up close to you, stopping in his tracks. "It's not that big of a deal. We can go out now." His breath was volatile.

"Just forget about it." You opted that the day would now be more enjoyable without him. Jimmy groaned with frustration. "Don't be like this. I made a one-time mistake, but it won't happen again. So let's just forget about it." You inhaled a shaky breath, weeks of pent-up frustration bubbling to the surface. "It's funny you say that because this isn't the first time you've done this." Your arm came up to wipe your tears that still threatened to escape. "I do so much for you- I supported you through everything. Yet you can't go one day without drinking so much you can't even function. Fucking look at yourself, Jimmy!" Your voice was breaking, the stress causing you to shake.

"OH! Well, if I'm such a piece of shit, why don't you just leave me, huh?" He yelled back, his arm reaching towards you and swaying 'matter of factly. You scowled, "Well, maybe if you don't even care enough to try and fix things, I should! I deserve someone who loves me enough to make an effort."

"Then maybe you should leave."

You were brought back to reality, and it hits you like a semi-truck. You'd spaced out, staring at Jimmy and whatever girl he'd decided to finesse tonight. In your daze, he'd taken notice of your lingering stare, making eye contact with you. Your breath hitches, and you quickly begin to walk past them, not wanting to deal with the conflict that could arise. Your chest felt as if it may cave in, ears and cheeks red hot. Finally, you'd made it inside of your space, feeling the sweet relief of solitude. A place where you could not be bothered, somewhere you could sleep off the stress of today and forget about it by tomorrow.

A knock sounded at your door, and your head snapped to the side with annoyance. You knew it was Jimmy, his insolence was aggravating. He knows that you have no interest in seeing him outside of any shows. You slanted the doorway enough to peek your head out. There he stood straight, alone. You looked around the area for anyone else. "What do you want?"

"We need to talk." His voice is soft. He smells pleasant. He also looks sober, to your suprise. You still felt bitter from his presence, feeling a strong urge to act petty. "You forgot to bring your leech. She's probably looking for you." You back away, about to cut him off. His hand comes up and grabs the edge of the door, keeping it open opposingly. "I'm serious. Can I please come in? I'll leave right after I say what I need to, promise." He stays calm, careful not to push further on the matter out of respect. His hand slides down the door to his side as if he's giving you the option to shut it if you want. Begrudgingly, you allow him to enter, curious about what he has to tell you so urgently. He steps inside, cautiously taking a seat on the couch and removing his hat. His curls are soft looking as they bounce at the now lack of restraint. You couldn't help but notice how clean he looked, freshly shaven, and washed.

You snap yourself out of staring at him for too long once again. "So what is it you wanted to say?" Your demeanor has changed, deciding that it's best to act civil now. Jimmy looks down at his hands, pursing his lips and rolling his head to the side. It takes him a minute to speak, but when he does, he looks you in the eyes. "I can't keep kissing strangers pretending that they're you."

You're flabbergasted and left at a loss of what to say or how to respond to his statement. It's you who's silent now, trying to process his words. Not giving you time to recuperate, he continues. "Losing you was the biggest mistake I ever made. You didn't deserve that. You're the only person in this world that really cared for me, and I blew it. I can't say sorry enough - I know I don't deserve forgiveness. It ain't right, the way I treated you. At the time, I could have come up with so many excuses about why I did what I did, but none a' that matters." He reaches into his pocket, grabbing a small box. "Sometimes I carry this with me because I think about finally manning up enough to give it to ya'. Even though it's been almost a year and I should've givin' it to you on your birthday, here." You take the small box in hand, the velvet fabric encasing it feeling luxurious against your fingertips. Upon opening, it was a small necklace with a heart and a little stone on the chain. The clear diamond-like crystal glistened beautifully.

You gazed up at him in disbelief, knowing this likely cost a pricey penny. He was smiling softly at you, a look of remorse on his face. Suddenly, you felt lighter, all of the pain you'd experienced beginning to vanish. To see him cleaned up and hear his apology resurfaced the love you always had for him. "Have you stopped drinking?" You felt the need to ask for a final precaution before deciding to forgive him. "Almost entirely, I can't keep acting like a fool anymore." You nod, taking in his statement. "I wanna be the man you deserve. I'll spend forever proving that to you if I have to." Jimmy offered you his hand, which you took. His touch was gentle, his thumb grazing against the back of your palm. "I miss you, Angel."

Instinctually, you'd hugged him; allowing yourself to melt in his familiar embrace. This was the Jimmy you fell in love with. His strong arms surround you, pulling you in even closer. His hand plays with your hair and strokes your neck affectionately. He dropped his face down and pressed a kiss to your shoulder. You pull away, reciprocating that by kissing his lips. It's a simple peck that you pull away from quickly. Jimmy brings up his hand, tracing your lips with his finger before kissing you himself. You melt into his touch, allowing him to do so until your brain felt fuzzy from contentment.

"I'm never letting you go again, sweetheart. That's a promise."

A promise he kept.

#ahs #evan peters #fluff #american horror story #jimmy darling #jimmy darling fluff #jimmy darling angst #angst

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evan4ever · 6 months

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James March x reader. The reader is very innocent like they don’t curse, drink, smoke, etc. James just adores it so much cuz it’s the opposite of him. He gives them random gifts and special dinners (maybe some slow dancing). As well as tons of affection like cheek and hand kisses, cuddles, holding hands, and helps you get ready for the day. He’s very overprotective and possessive of them like a kid who has a special teddy bear, so the other ghosts better watch their backs if they try to mess with the reader. He never lets them know he’s a serial killer but they know he’s a ghost.

Innocence

Warnings: talk about murder just a bit but no warnings really, just a sweet fic again!

a/n: you didn’t really give me a plot andI wasn’t sure if you wanted lime a headcannon or not so I hope what I came up with works for you 😅 but with reader being innocent and almost too naive while JPM protects her and is possessive lol 🥹

—

You first met James when you had to find a hotel quick and one that didn’t cost your entire paychecks worth to stay in for a night. You were in the city for a last minute job interview the next day, and you were lucky enough to meet the owner of the Cortez who has offered you a deal to stay.

You were pretty blown away by his offer, having been at the lounge where you enjoyed a nice glass of lemon water before the man, who introduced himself as James Patrick March, approached you. After some visiting, and many odd but enjoyable questions from him later, he offered you the night for a discounted price of $15. You weren’t sure why, but didn’t dare object.

However, your original plan to call it a night by 8 PM soon turned to 11 PM, then next thing you knew it was 2 in the morning and James and yourself just couldn’t seem to pry away from each other. It was magnetizing being around the other, for both.

James was so beyond intrigued by you. He knew times had changed, and that modern day women weren’t as classy and “well kept” as they were in his day. But you were different, not at all like the females that trotted into the hotel, getting drunk or high and using such foul language with every word, wearing nothing more than a dress that barely covered them. No. You were the classy that James once adored and almost never saw again.

It drew him to you. Not just how you dressed or how you spoke, but your pure and complete innocence. It was something James wanted to protect, he wanted you to keep forever. And he’d make sure of it, if you let him of course.

Though he drank, he, on occasion, would use a foul word, and he had no innocence left in him — you were the opposite of him. And if it were a true myth, James believed it was love at first sight.

That night was the beginning of your most exciting, spoiled life; and that is said with confidence.

You had started returning to see James often, more and more often, until you practically lived there. You met many people, some you enjoyed, some you weren’t fond of. But it was many months later that James finally vowed his love to you, you returning the vow, and James filling you in on part of his secret.

You learned he was a ghost. And for someone like you, it didn’t take much convincing. However, you weren’t scared of him in the slightest. It did make you more cautious around the other ghosts and ghouls that forever took residency in the hotel, but never around James. And he promised himself he’d never allow you to find out of his dark side, the murder side of him. That was a side of him that he kept hidden away because he had found such joy through you that he almost didn’t need to feel the excitement of killing others by his own hands.

He knew someone like you would never be okay with murder. Especially if those who were innocent. And he didn’t expect you to ever change that part of you, so he simply never let you in on that secret side of him.

It was easy.

Besides Devils Night.

That was hard the first time you had been in the hotel during it. But, he was able to keep you preoccupied long enough with the help of Liz to get the night over with, where he expressed to the other monsters he guessed that you were completely and utterly off limits.

But the years spent together after that, Devils Night was never a concern. You never even caught on.

But the years spent with James were years he spoiled you rotten. He’d buy you anything you expressed interest in. He’d shower you in flowers. He’d run you a bath every night. He simply could not do enough for you to feel satisfied, because he was just that in love with you.

And though you were just as in love with him, he’d never allow you to go above and beyond for him the way he did for you. You would try, and he’d stop you. The most you were able to do for him was buy him his favorite cologne or alcohol, even when you had no idea about anything alcohol related. He loved the gesture, but never let you do much more.

You weren’t sure what you did to deserve someone like James. Needless to say, you never went to your job interview that first time staying in the hotel. And only a few months later, you basically lived in the hotel. Only some months after that, you stayed with James in his suite 24/7. At that point, you were his and he was yours. Even now, 6 years later.

You made it so easy for him, too. You never questioned anything. He was able to run three quarters of his life with you while using the other quarter to fulfill his murder tendencies and keep the hotel running accordingly. He even managed to keep you from meeting the countess, somehow. He had Liz and Sally to thank for that. He was aware of the mess that could bring, and he was in such a good place with you, wrapped around each others fingers.

That nearly came to an end.

“My love?” You entered the living area of your suite where James had been filling his cup with whatever alcohol he was drinking this time. He glanced at you and smiled brightly.

“Yes dear?” He sips while eyeing you so you’d know you had his full attention. You smiled, a half way smile, not your typical smile, and James immediately became concerned. “What is it? Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, James, really.. it’s just.. I had an encounter today. With—“

“Elizabeth.” James finished your sentence, noticeably unhappy by this. You only nodded, allowing him to explain himself. “Ah yes. The time has come that I must tell you about her.” He sighs, taking ahold of your hand gently and leading you to the couch where you allowed him to help you sit, he sitting beside you. “Listen, dear,” he pauses, seeming unsure of where to start.

“I’m not angry, James.” You reassured before he could start again. His eyes seemed to relax as they remained glued to yours. “I just want to know the story from you.”

“What all… did she say.. exactly?” He asked, genuinely curious. He didn’t care about much of anything she could possibly tell you, only if she were to have revealed his deepest secret about his love for murdering, or if she had threatened you at all.

“She only told me of her past with you. I’m unsure whether it was a warning? Like, her way of telling me I should run while I can?” You raised your eyebrow at him curiously before letting a smile take place on your lips. “Not that I would ever listen to such a silly suggestion. I love you too much.” You grabbed his hand this time, squeezing it. “I just had no idea you were ever married.”

James sighed but held your hand tightly, bringing it up to his lips and placing a soft kiss to your knuckles before setting and holding it against his chest.

“I was, yes. A long, long… long time ago. Elizabeth being the original owner of this hotel, we married and I took over. I showered her with all my love, I gave her everything. I thought she was my one and only.” James goes quiet as you tilt your head, letting him finish. “I know now how very wrong I was.” He met your eyes again with sincerity, squeezing your hands that he was still holding against his chest.

“So what happened?” You asked, curious to know more about him. James kept things hidden from you, you were aware of that. But you were much too in love to question him too much, and some things you knew better than to want to know, so you were okay with being kept in the dark. But since this was an opportunity to learn a little more about his past, you couldn’t help but indulge in it.

“She was only using me, dear. I was a means to fill a void that I wasn’t aware was empty and longing for a past lover. She loved my gifts and my attention. But had no interest in loving me like I did her. Later, her past lover showed up out of nowhere and she was planning to run away with him. After that, I no longer cared for her.”

“But, she’s still here? Why?”

James went silent, not sure how to fill this part of the story. He didn’t kill Rudolph or Natacha. But he did lock them in this hotel and remove the door so they’d have to spend eternity here… since they were already vampires and couldn’t die. James felt it was a nice revenge on his now ex-wife, she believes they re-abandoned her all over again. She loves her life in anger and wonder, and it’s so sweet for James to see.

“They left her. Abandoned her again.” He nodded. You frown, feeling somewhat sympathetic for Elizabeth. “Don’t frown for the woman!” James states, a deep frown on his own face. “She was a monster, dear. I know you’re not one to feel this way for anyone you know but, she got all she deserved.”

You gazed at him for a moment as you took in his words before sighing and taking your hands from hi, resting one hand on the side of his face. “I do love you, James. So very much.” James leans into your hand, his eyes closing as he takes in the feeling of your skin against his, your scent so strong and as intoxicating as the alcohol he sips daily. “You don’t have to feel anger anymore, though. You can let it go, all the hurt and betrayal that woman caused you. She is no longer worth your while. For your own happiness, you should let it go.”

James listened to you, knowing your words held so much truth. It amazes him at times, how a woman of your culture could be so intelligent, so mature past your young age. He was blessed beyond words.

“You’re right, dear. You are very right.” He takes ahold of and turns his face into your hand, kissing from your palm up the majority of your soft, fragile arm. You smiled in awe as you watched him, his eyes glancing up to meet yours. “You amaze be every day.”

“I’m glad to hear that. Because you keep me on my toes every day. Never can know just what to expect here, but I would never trade it for anything.”

—

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vintage-marina · 2 years

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"I know what you did."

summary: you found out what he's done

f!reader, but it isn't really specified

angst

TW: SA, school shooting basically everything what Tate did, fighting, screaming

words: 1103

@dreamsweetener

"He," pausing for a second you looked at Violet with a haunted expression. "He did what?"

With sad eyes Violet looked at you, the two of you standing in the guest room. Her foot was constantly tapping on the ground, her hands clammy. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, Y/N."

She took a step forwards, she noticed the silent tears on your cheeks. Blewing out the air of your lungs you tried to calm yourself, a small sob left your body and before Violet could prepare herself you threw yourself in her arms.

"I should've told you earlier," she mumbled. Her chin was leaning on your shoulder, both you and Violet were holding eachother for 'dear life'.

"It's not your fault." reassuring her you stared blankly at the wooden closet. "I'm glad you told me although it's a bit late."

The both of you fell still, knowing that in the silence the both of you still held eachother dearly. The gears in your brain started working, with each passing second you became more and more angry at Tate.

"I think I have to talk to him, Vi." Slowly you let go of her, unclasping your hands from her vest.

"What are you going to say to him?"

"I," you wiped a few tears away. "Don't know."

"Don't do anything stupid, okay? Pinky promise me."

"I promise," the both of you hold out your pinkies and clasped them together.

Taking some deep breaths you left the room, anger following in your trails. Your heavy footsteps echoed through the house while your breathing was ragged.

You had to find him.

With an agressive swing you opened the door, to his old bedroom (that was now yours). The room was clattered with your clothing and make-up, your walls decorated with pictures and posters, but the room was empty. Letting out a huff of frustration, you slammed the door shut.

Realisation dawned on you that he probably knew what Violet had said, he must have hid himself. A few curse words left your lips and you pulled your hand over your face in frustration.

What the hell, Tate.

What the fuck is wrong with you?

You have to be calm if you want to confront him, why did he have to shatter your heart like that? Slowly you opened your bedroomdoor again and stepped in your room, when you closed it you let your head hung on the door. A deep sigh escaped your lips and a soft sob followed through.

A deep sadness clung in your chest.

You slid down on the ground, your mascara was smeared on your cheeks and with shaky hands you tried to wipe the tears away. For a long, long time you sat like this.

Zoned out, you stared ahead of you.

Headache already forming.

"Tate?" You called out with a hoarse voice. "Please I-we need to talk."

Ignoring your call, Tate tugged at his hair while he mumbled inchorent things. Tears streamed on his cheeks and he sunk on his knees, you were going to leave him.

"Tate!" He heard you crying out, his dead heart shattered at the voice cracks. Why did Violet said something? At the thought of her name, a few more tears fell down.

Buring your head in your hands, your shoulders shook.

Was Vivien in pain during the act?

What did Tate say to his victims?

Were they in pain when they were murdered?

Is he going to hurt you too?

You were getting scared of him.

"Please don't leave me, Y/N," was all that you heard. You looked at him with tears in your eyes, his hair was all over the place and his eyes bright red from his cries. His hand tried to reach out for you and he walked towards you, trying to pull himself in your embrace.

His way to calm himself.

"Stay back," you said with all the strength you could muster. You couldn't trust him anymore. "What?" His face was full of disbelief, more tears brimmed up at the edge of his brown eyes. "Why?" Voice small he stared at the ground, watching his teardrops fell on the wooden floor. What he thought to himself was true, you didn't want him anymore.

Quickly you scrambled up, your arms clung protectively against your midriff. "Why?" you said slowly almost in disbelief. "Why Tate?"

He nodded and a small "yeah" escaped his lips.

"I don't," you took a deep breath and wiped with your hand your tears away. "I know what you did."

"I didn't mean to!" He screamed in desperation, waving his hands erratically. "You have to trust me, Y/N!"

"But I don't Tate! I don't!" you screamed back at him, with half swollen eyes you looked mistrustful at him. "You-you probably don't even regret it," a coldness was in your eyes.

Locking his brown eyes with the cold eyes of yours, he got goosebumps. Anger and panick flowed in his veins and in one swift motion he held your wrist, "That's not true."

You held your mouth firmly, seeing the stormy haze in his eyes you shrunk away. Violet hopefully was nearby, incase things went south. The storm was getting darker and darker and in frustration he screamed: "That not true! You know that's not who I am!"

Tears were still flowing on his cheeks and he shook at you, while his grip was getting stronger and stronger. Flinching you tried pulling your wrist out of his hand, "Let me go Tate," you mumbled voice barely a whisper.

But he didn't, he didn't let you go.

A grunt of pain escaped your mouth and your lungs went wheezing after the impact your back had on the wall. His hands were now on your shoulders and he sobbed in despair that he did regret it and that you shouldn't leave him.

Your head was trobbing and you whispered tearfully: "I don't know you anymore, Tate."

Brown eyes widening, he realised something that you didn't know. He knew you were afraid of him, "You know," his voice cracking slightly while his trembling hand cupped your cheek. Noticing the hitch in your breath, he saw you were trembling too. "I would never hurt you, ever."

You fluttered your eyes, closing only for a moment. Shaking off his hand of your cheek you embraced him while your heart was thundering in your ears. The blond boy melted in your arms and before he could pull you even tighter you whispered at the shell of his ear: "You just did."

"What?" He said again, he began sniffling. "When?"

You shook your head and your hand grapsed the doorknob, "You don't even realise it."

He watched in defeat when you walked out of the door, he didn't follow you. When he saw you leaving the ground out of the window, he curled himself up in a ball and cried in frustration.

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not-alien-girl-v · 7 months

Text

Evan Peters Masterlist

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･�� .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

Characters I Write For:

AHS

Tate Langdon

Kit Walker

Kyle Spencer

Jimmy Darling

James March

Kai Anderson

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

My Favs

Frat Boy Kyle 3: This Time It's Personal

Sick

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

* signifies smut

The Evans

Evans + PDA

Evans as Nicole Dollanganger Songs

Heights of the Evans

Evans x Manic Pixie Dream Girl

Evans + Gas Station Orders

Evans + Internet HCs

Evans as Ethel Cain Songs

Tate Langdon

Tate HCs 1

Tate HCs 2

Love Languages

Tate x ADHD!Reader

Road Trip HCs

Beach Day

Tate Gets Jealous

Tate HCs Pt 3

Tate x Cooking

Tate x Romance

Picnic + Running Away

Fluff Alphabet

Coldstone

Tate x Transmasc!Reader

Tate x Plus Size!Reader

Kit Walker

Anything and Everything

Love Languages

Kyle Spencer

Halloween

Frat Boy Kyle

Frat Boy Kyle Again

Frat Boy Kyle 3: This Time Its Personal

Frat Boy Kyle 4: The Squeakquel

Frat Boy Kyle 5: This Time They Fight and its Stupid

Frat Boy Kyle 6: They Break Up?!?!

James March

Sick

Love Languages

Kai Anderson

Love Languages

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

𝙍𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙄𝙣𝙛𝙤

𝙊𝙥𝙚𝙣!!! 𝙄 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛 + 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙨𝙩 + 𝙨𝙢𝙪𝙩 + 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩

𝙄 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙔/𝙉, 𝙪𝙣𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙖 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙛𝙞𝙘 𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚 + 𝙙𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙡𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 / 𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚, 𝙄 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙜𝙡𝙖𝙙𝙡𝙮 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙞𝙩.

𝙎𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙩 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙮. 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙡𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙡 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙪𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩, 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙖 𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙡 𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙖 / 𝙖𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙘 / 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙥𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄’𝙡𝙡 𝙧𝙪𝙣 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙞𝙩. 𝙄’𝙡𝙡 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜.

𝘽𝙖𝙨𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮, 𝙢𝙮 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙗𝙚 𝙤𝙥𝙚𝙣, 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙄 𝙢𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙨 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙡𝙮 𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙡𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢, 𝙄’𝙢 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙜𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨 𝙄’𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚 𝙤𝙣 𝙖 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄’𝙡𝙡 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙖 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙥𝙪𝙡𝙡𝙨 𝙢𝙚 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙞𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄’𝙡𝙡 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙩 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙤 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜!

𝙎𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙖𝙣 𝙖𝙨𝙠 𝙤𝙧 𝙖 𝙙𝙢 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙤𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩!! 𝙄 𝙘𝙪𝙧𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙙𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙢𝙠 𝙞𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪 + 𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙜𝙚𝙙 𝙞𝙣 𝙚𝙭. 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮, 𝙨𝙢𝙪𝙩 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮, 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧.

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drowningyoursorrow · 8 months

Text

WHITE FERRARI

tate langdon x gn! reader

You reminisce about your lover, the days that you spent together during your years of being high school sweethearts. And on how it ended so quickly and so suddenly. You've grown older and as soon as you did, you left where the both of you resided immediately, the remembrance of him pained you. In hopes for one last connection, you buy his childhood home, which was now abandoned. Slowly you started to feel as if you see him everywhere, maybe it was your imagination.

!!!: kissing? violence (guns, shooting, death, etc.) & minor mentions of drugs W/C: 3.5k

TATE LANGDON was his name, at first in the beginning, before the two of you first met you thought of him as sort of odd. He didn't really fit in, almost as if he didn't want to in a way. He had the looks, god he had the looks, short blonde hair and his dark eyes that made you still. You never really interacted with groups and sort of did your own thing, just minding your own business. Occasionally, you'd encounter Tate, you decided to only interact with him when it's really necessary.

You never really judged him, you just didn't want to partake in any social cliques and didn't have any friends really. Tate seemed to sense this, and it furthered his sudden interest in you, although you two weren't entirely similar. He felt a bond with you, you didn't feel it or didn't acknowledge it at first, and that was fine with him. He would study you from afar and felt as if you didn't belong with anybody here but him, but he was far too scared to interact with you. You felt the same, but you believed that he was constantly judging you whenever his brown orbs locked with yours.

Soon the two of you would look for each other in the rows of people crowding the long hallways. Forming a silent connection with one another, and slowly you would begin to openly communicate with each other. Just small hi's and hello's, yet both of you wanted to say more but never knew how to say it. Tate was smart, but that didn't seem to be his main catching point. No, it was the shy smiles he would give you once you two would sit together in the cafeteria.

It was how he would talk about how high school was just boring as ever and that the only two people that matter. Were you two. You were perfect in his eyes, everything that he's ever dreamed of, you didn't fit in, and you didn't want to. Just like him. It was almost as if you two were meant to be together, but you didn't realize it as quickly as he did.

And he was gladly willing to wait, I mean the two of you weren't even dating yet, so who was he to tell? Your relationship together did grow, eventually spending more time and time together. You always hung out at your place, him never wanting to be at his and finding comfort in your room. He loved everything about it, he loved everything about you, he loved everything you did and said. He was so infatuated with you.

As you were with him, it wasn't because he was different, it was because he simply was himself. He always sought safety with you, and you gladly provided that solitude for him. Tate was truly the most beautiful person that your eyes could ever lay on, his boyish charm drawing you in. He always made sure that you felt comfortable and swore to do everything to protect you from those judging eyes. It didn't matter to either of you on how you appeared to the rest of the world, only mattering to each other.

Eventually, both of you wanted more, but Tate was too in his head about it, so you decided to make the first move. He finally let you come to his house, but only when his mother wasn't home. You remember how he would cry to you about his troubles and worries with her, you despised the woman deeply. You remember him telling you about how his dad left, not really wanting to talk about it. And you never pushed.

You traced the items in his room, observing every corner and every object that you could come into contact with. He only watched you do so, basking in your presence, content with you being in his closure. Eventually, you seated yourself at the end of his bed, him crawling to lay beside you. Resting his head on your lap and placed your hands in his hair. You brushed through his golden locks and felt him ease into you, as he stared at you with those eyes.

You felt your chest tighten and butterflies fill your stomach, the feeling was new, so you turned away from him. Furthermore, you placed your hands on your side and closed your eyes, releasing a profound sigh. You hated that he looked at you--as if he was in love with you because you… you wanted him to. He quickly sat up and stared up at you, worry taking over his features, overthinking the situation. You felt him tense up beside you, knowing it was his insecurities taking over.

Opening your eyes, you looked at him and just gave a smile, it was enough to ease him but not enough to calm him. You thought for a moment, finally deciding to let your feelings take over. Lifting his palm, you placed it over your face and lightly kissed the end of his fingertips. Tate didn't know what to do, he only stared in awe as you let his hand cradle the side of your face. You stared ahead for a moment as Tate observed your features, wanting to know what you were thinking; what you'd do next.

He didn't expect tears to fall from your eyes as you trembled just beneath him, he perked up and held you more steadily. He was more concerned now and yet even though you were crying, he didn't see any hint of sadness on your features. Only disappointment, which he thought was far worse. Instead, he let you sob into his shoulder and grip onto him as if he was going to leave you any second. He could only whisper words of affirmations into your shoulder as tears also escaped him, the image of seeing you cry made him ache.

You both held onto each other, letting everything out that the two of you bottled and hid away from one another. Only then did you look at him in the eyes, wiping away the tears that slid down his face mournfully. And let the words escape you, "I think I love you." He stilled underneath you, a mix of emotions taking over his features, he was scared to do or say anything. In case you tried to change your mind, you took his quietness the wrong way and retreated away from him.

This made Tate scared, so he quickly, without thinking, reached over to you and kissed you. He kissed you as if you two were dying in each other's arms, and this was the last moment the both of you shared together. It was messy and horrible, but the feeling the both of you shared made up for all of it. You two belonged with each other. You both just rested your foreheads together, childish giggles escaping the both of you as you smiled.

It was like the both of you just received candy for the first time, it was like you two achieved the world together. You two only stayed there for a moment before laying back down together in each other's embrace. Oh, how you wish you could stay at this moment forever together, just with each other. Eventually you two had to depart, but instead of being sullen, you both looked forward to what is to come. Tate was over the moon that night, finally achieving the person of his dreams, he replayed the moment you two shared over and over again; before he eventually fell asleep.

The days and months passed by, and it was all wonderful, the time you two would share together. All the new things that you could finally do with one another, the dates were remarkable. You never thought you could love someone like you loved Tate, and he never thought he can love someone like you again. The ache that he always felt was eventually filled with you and you only, he made you feel like you really did matter. You two were just love sick fools, and it was the best thing in the world.

The years moved forward and everything began to change, and so did the both of you, for the better and for the worse. You decided to focus more with your studies, which meant less time for Tate, and he didn't enjoy it. Not one bit, he would try to reason with you, but he just wouldn't listen, he didn't understand. He didn't care about school, he just cared about you, and that was the problem. He brushed off on how difficult it was for you in school, it was easy for him because of his natural intelligence.

Every time he told you that you'd be fine, you felt as if he was condescending you because it was all just so easy for him. He couldn't understand you, and you began to not be able to understand him. Fights began to become frequent, and you couldn't take it anymore, you loved him, you really did, but you needed to focus on yourself. Before you could focus on him, and he didn't get that concept, so asking for a break wasn't easy. It was hard for the both of you, but Tate handled it worse than you did.

You sat him down in his room and stood before him, Tate suspected what this was about, yet he couldn't come to terms with it. So when your tone shifted to more serious, and you avoided eye contact with him, he denied everything you said. He wouldn't listen and began to sob hysterically and breaking everything he could reach, he couldn't accept it, he didn't want to. Tate wasn't listening to you, so you just decided to leave, you couldn't handle this. He fell to his knees and grabbed onto you, breaking down as he clung onto your legs.

He eventually let you go, and you turned away from his cries, this was only for a moment, you'll be back. But did he know that? You haven't heard from him ever since that day, he stopped showing up to the school. And he didn't reply to your calls and messages, maybe you shouldn't have done this. You began to regret your decision.

After a month or so he reappeared again, a black coat adorning his frame as he strutted past you, almost as if you weren't there. His expression was off, and he seemed out of it, usually he was, but not like this. It was unsettling. You brushed it off, just glad that he was finally back. You headed off to the library to study, since it was quieter there and you could relax peacefully.

You were settled into a corner of the room before you heard a loud noise, you looked around and everyone seemed just surprised as you were. Before it was heard again and screaming from the distance, it finally clicked. Those were gunshots. Everyone in the library began to panic, and the teacher tried to barricade the doorways as everyone hid in separate areas. You quickly rushed under two desks and enclosed in between chairs as silence took place. Then there it was, the sound of heavy footsteps approaching the library, you were terrified.

What scared you more was if Tate was hurt, he was always quick, so you hoped for the best. You hoped for his safety. Then you heard crashing and banging, you shook and held in your cries. Then there it was, they got in. You could only hold your breath as you heard the steps circle around the room.

And before you knew it, you heard mumbling, then a frantic voice and then a bang. You couldn't believe this, you didn't want to, you heard more yelling and pleads and just held your head in between your arms. You didn't want to die, not like this, you still wanted to reconcile with Tate. You still wanted to be with him. Through your fingers, you could see the corpses, but you couldn't see the perpetrator.

Fear took through you as you suddenly realized that they were standing before you, peering through the chairs. And you felt your heart stop, there stood the boy you loved for years. His once beautiful and soul driven eyes staring downward at you, lifeless. You stilled, and you felt tears cascade down your face as a pained expression took place. All you could do was shake and mouth a silent, why?

His expression didn't change, and the gun still was held within his grip as he took in your features. You only cowered beneath him and closed your eyes, sorrowfully content with dying by the hands of your beloved. But the more you waited, there was nothing, eventually you opened your eyes and no longer stood Tate. He was gone. You soon heard the wailing of sirens and the cries of students and teachers, you only laid frozen.

Why hadn't he shot you?

...

Years have passed, and the question still played in your mind, the guilt hasn't subsided. Why were you the surviving victim? Eventually you did grow from it and as soon as you turned 18 you left L.A, you stayed in a different city for a while before you returned. You didn't want to keep running away, you needed to confront it, yet it was still difficult. You stood in front of the house before you, it's much older now but still looked the same as before.

It was his house, you thought if you bought the place it would bring comfort to you. But it only felt unsettling when you stepped inside, you heard what happened to him right after the shooting. Being gunned down, before you couldn't even think about, but now it just leaves a bitter taste at the tip of your tongue. Exploring the house and the rooms, you felt as if you were already being watched, ever corner you turned. Ghostly eyes following your figure.

You've heard of deaths correlated with this house yet for some reason you weren't so scared about dying here. You eventually brushed away the thought and settled with staying in a different room, not wanting to sleep in his. That was the only difficult part in being in the house, so to distract yourself you got a job. You were gone most of the time, this time you decided you needed a few drinks with your coworkers. Eventually, you came stumbling home in a drunken state and laid in which room was the closest.

You felt the sheets beneath you as you tried to make sense of where you were, realization hit you as you gathered your senses. It was his room. Everything seemed to be the same beside minor differences, someone else must've lived here before. You could imagine his faint smell and basked in it for just a moment, you peered up as it felt like someone was staring down at you. There he was looking down at you, he held a confused expression, you shrieked and curled away from him.

Holding your head as you tried to recollect yourself, just telling your imagination to go away. It was silent, then he was gone. Were you hallucinating? Unsure of what to make up of what just happened, you just silently cried as you buried yourself into the bed. You missed him terribly, although you shouldn't, you cried yourself to sleep that night.

A ghost watched over you, he could only really stare from afar, afraid to scare you like he did before. Oh, how he wanted to hold you once more, he's spent so long without you, and he finally had you again. He couldn't ruin this, your absence broke him deeply and still hadn't fully moved on from you. He tried to with someone new, violet, but he knew in his core that he wouldn't love anybody like you. It ended as soon as it began, and now he had you again.

You awoke abruptly, the sun radiating through the room's window, were you dreaming last night? Brushing it off, you stumbled out of bed and went back into your room. Ever since then, every night when you would return home, there he stood, looking down at you. You could never make out what type of expression he was making, but it always felt mournful, you were too scared to reach out back to him. But as the months passed by, you stopped trying to hide and push away the remembrance of him.

One particular night when he would appear once more, just to check up on you, too scared to do anything more or less. You reached toward him this time, instead of telling him to go way, and held him gently as you observed his features. He avoided your gaze but let himself melt into your touch, he missed this. Even if this was just your imagination, you loved every second of it, he looked the same as he did before. "I've dreamed of this," was all you said as you held him a little longer, before eventually pulling away.

This felt torturous to the both of you, and you knew you shouldn't do this to yourself, he was only your imagination. So you let go, you pushed him away as you closed your eyes, and he could only stare down at you. He wanted to hold you like he used to, but he knew better, time will tell. Eventually he did show up more around different areas of the house, and you just took it as you slowly becoming crazy. Because he never spoke to you, only stared and let you do what you wanted while he was in your presence.

You didn't mind going insane, only if you could see and feel him a bit more, maybe then it wouldn't be so bad. This time you stared at his dark irises, taking in his form, he hasn't changed, just as you remembered him. "You know, I couldn't bare to say your name after what you did. I was too scared, I felt too guilty to even utter the first letter." Silence overtook you as his expression shifted into remorse, you didn't take notice, instead you continued.

Turning away from him, your throat began to feel dry as you stared forward, not wanting to look at him anymore. You buried your face into the palms of your hands as tears slowly began to take over. "Why'd you do it? Why would you do that? Was it because of me? Did I push you too far? Why would you leave me alive? Why...?" You didn't expect an answer, and you didn't get one, sobs raked through you as you clung onto yourself. What you didn't suspect was him to envelop you into a hug, something familiar.

You let him hold you, a strange feeling taking over you, he was physically there yet he felt so cold. "Why can't you be real?" Was all you muttered before you pushed him away from you and headed out the front door, needing some air. He tried to say something, but his words were caught in his throat as he watched you leave, time will tell entered his mind once more. You came home late that night, only to discover he was where you left him, patiently waiting for your return.

You only gave him a short glance before heading back to your room, letting your thoughts consume you. Staring upward at the ceiling before, you felt a dip in the mattress beside you. He was curled next to you but kept his distance on the bed, not wanting to bother you. He just wanted to be near you. You thought for a moment, slipping your arms around him and pulled him closer to your frame.

Holding him like you used to, a content sigh escaped his lips, relishing in the sentimental feeling. He missed this more than anything, you just holding him and comforting him, it was all he needed. You shakily kissed his forehead and let yourself cherish this moment, you really wished this was real. But you knew he would be gone by morning, and you would go busy yourself once more. "I love you."

The words unconsciously slipped through your lips as sleep took over, and you held him closer. He didn't say anything, he wanted to, but he knew if we were to he would have to answer questions he didn't want to answer. Sure, he was selfish for acting like he couldn't speak to you, but eventually he was going to have to. So, he was going to enjoy this as long as he could, and maybe he will come clean about his whole being dead thing. Just above a whisper, he hid into your arms for more closure, "I love you too."

He hoped you wouldn't have heard his confession, but you had, and a small smile formed on your lips. You would take all the drugs in the world just to keep seeing him and being near him. He was all you ever really did want in this godforsaken world, it was a blessing and a curse. Because in the end all you two ever wanted in the world was each other, one way or another you both were going to achieve it. What you didn't know was that maybe Tate Langdon wasn't just your imagination.

..............................................................................................................................

- I am back from writer's block, hope this was a sufficient apology - Frank Ocean is my soul honestly - Briefly proofread (skimmed) - Maybe a part two if I'm feelin it

Hope you enjoyed and if you have any requests or questions please dm!

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feefymo · 3 months

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The Rorchach Effect - Part 1

Jimmy Darling x fem! reader - NSFW • MDNI word count: 2757 author's notes: it was like a multiple birth but here we are. This is my very first attempt of a fanfiction (and it's not written in my native language) but I worked a lot on it and I hope you enjoy it. I tried to keep It simple. After mulling it over I chose to divide the fic in two parts and yes: the smut is in the second part! It's not proofread because I'm a kamikaze, yes. Little curiosity: I was partly inspired by Saltburn and this soundtrack. What else? I'll leave you to read! Be kind, pleaseee! My hashtag is #ficfymo ! summary: Elsa threw a party for Jimmy's birthday but no one knows where he ended up. Fem! Reader POV. warnings: mention of violence, and blood. I think that's it, for now. https://open.spotify.com/intl-it/track/6Huqy9WdEE3rMazEQgajn2?si=2105621ac0044260

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome.

I'm the one they call the Rorschach Woman; my real name is not important.

Do any of you know what vitiligo is? Vitiligo is a disease but in the maternal arms of Elsa Mars, nothing is bad. None of her adopted children are sick: we all have a gift, don't we, Elsa? I had a boundless love for ballet, I was busily studying psychiatry, I was a "prodigy girl" or, at least, I thought I was. Then, the vitiligo showed up. What I thought was my downfall, according to Elsa, represented the true miracle. I gave up dancing; I gave up on my dream of becoming a researcher. I lost the support of my real parents because my appearance had changed but hey! Now I have my own number in Elsa Mars Freak Show. I'm here to enchant you. To let you read the spots on my face. I'm here to interpret your minds. This is my personal test of Rorschach, offered to you, kind audience. A few dollars and you can study me, myself every night but not every night are like this. Tonight I want to tell you a story 'cause today is my best friend's birthday. The brother I've chosen. Tonight, a big party was thrown for him but there's no trace of him. Where did you go, Jimmy Darling?

Let's take a step back.

I've never seen the camp so packed. Never. If all these people showed up for every show, each of us would be filthy rich. I don't understand how it is possible and yet, Elsa must have performed one of her magics. She says she consider Jimmy her blood, so she claimed to organize everything herself. She chose a party theme: "Normal People". She call it "satire", a mockery towards those who are truly considered normal. Some of us believed her, others adapted to avoid getting into trouble. The truth is that, by disguising ourselves according to the canons, we appear even less credible. Grotesque. Ridicolous. I couldn't resist a subtle provocation, so I made my complexion uniform but with the white of French mimes. Like a pierrot. Totally painted in white, I wander around in a champagne dress. I look like a crazy moth until I find the flame. That flame is Jimmy himself, surrounded by a myriad of strangers who urge him to blow out the candles.

- Happy birthday… uhm… -

- Happy birt… Joseph? -

- Jack? John? -

- I think it's Jimmy. -

- Jimmy? Are you sure? -

- JIMMY! -

The music does not cover the murmurs nor the embarrassment that comes down like a curtain. I try to push and elbow to reach my best friend but I can't. He's standing there, nerves to edge: he looks around, clenching his teeth. He seems lost while he's trying to put an unconvinced smile on his Peter Pan face. Once the candles have been blown out, Jimmy disappears in the general disinterest. Nobody cares, the party continues as if nothing had happened, fueling an atmosphere that has nothing normal about it. It's something like a mesmerizing nightmare in the suffused lights that Elsa had placed everywhere. A luminous design that even turns into a labyrinth in the wild meadow near the main event. It should be a modern fairy tale for the privileged who want to escape from the routine. For us, scum, it's an illusion. A utopia, a warning of what we will never achieve but I don't give a fucking damn. Sincerely. If I'm still here it's not because of Elsa nor because I truly appreciate her Cabinet Of Curiosities. I'm still here for my "acquired family" and for the boy who should be the protagonist of the evening which no one cares about.

Driven by the chaos, I search for familiar faces in the dim light until I come across Ethel; she shaved her chin. She is holding a plate with a slice of cake that she has prepared herself and she's standing in the dancing crowd, with a worried and resigned look. We both knows who the cake is for: Ethel has seen his son, maybe talked to him but she won't chase him. I prefer to not disturb her but I don't give up: retreating into a slit of darkness I collide with someone and jump perhaps exaggeratedly. Paul emerges from the darkness, rubbing his side with a grimace. He wears a hideous, gigantic suit to disguise his condition. It makes it look like a sad parallelepiped. Doctor Frankenstein's Creature.

-Paul, sorry! Did I hurt you?! -

-Nah, no biggies! What about you? You're nervous, what's happening? -

-Well, uh, I'm… have you seen Jimmy? I've been looking for him all night. -

- First I saw him with a brunette, she was dragging him towards El-'s tent… hey, that's the one over there! -

But the brunette is not in Jimmy's company: laughing rudely with her friends, she passes by me in a sweet-smelling cloud of glitters. She carries with her a kind of old oil lantern lit on a gesture that makes my blood run cold: cheeky, she twirls a battered glove on her head and, in one breath of Pink Lady, she's already too far away. Even though I would like to, I'm not going to confront her and complicate things because I prefer to follow her steps backwards. An alarm screams wildly inside me and I have to comply with it by launching myself out of the tent. The humidity of the night sticks to my skin, kneading the white paint that I thought was dry. I'm a mess inside and out but it doesn't matter at all.

- JIMMY! - I call, shout and run. I run, run, run like a fugitive. A voice whispers the worst to me and maybe I'm crazy but I can't help it. - JIMMY! - I keep repeating myself but he doesn't answer. The throat burns, the feet go by themselves, swaying dangerously on the heels. I didn't even realize I had ventured onto the lawn until I felt tickles on my ankles. Fräulain Elsa's illuminations invite me to follow their aura like drunken fireflies and I, disaffected, accept. I'm not afraid that Jimmy is dead but, worse, that he's gone. That he left me alone, leaving suddenly and without me. He promised me that if we ever succeeded, we would leave together and one suitcase would be enough to move to Europe. He always kept his promises, he…

I stop, crystallized in the heaviness of the evening. I hear noises scattered throughout the maze of light bulbs: they come from a specific point but they echo and bounce in the air. It sounds like the clumsy moan of an animal that it would be better not to get close to but I obstinately follow the source to the center of the maze. Once I reach my destination I jump somewhere between horror and relief, putting a hand to my mouth so as not to be discovered immediately. Sitting on the ground is Jimmy Darling. Hunched over, he turns his back to me and fiddles with something I don't understand. He is surrounded by objects, some of which I cannot distinguish. There are a few bottles including one of vermouth still sealed, half a lemon, a shirt reduced to a pile of wrinkles in Granada Green, the other glove specially sewn for the party. Some salt, perhaps? The worst aspect, the most dramatic touch, is a pinata hanging over his skull. A lobster-shaped pinata. As I try to figure out whether or not I'm awake, a low, deep growl forces its way into Jimmy's lungs, flaying them with increasing violence. The growl is quickly turning into the pained cry of an already wounded beast. I won't respect his privacy any longer, so I walk over to him and kneel before him.

- JIMMY! JIM, STOP IT! STOP, DAMMIT! - Jimmy was on the verge of cutting off his left hand with a rusty knife but my arrival ruined his plans. He doesn't recognize me right away and his immediate reaction is to turn against me. He is much, much stronger than me but, even if he vehemently chases me away, I attack again in what turns into a blind scuffle. The moment Jim realizes it's really me, he drops his guard groggily. He is no less upset, nor willing to suddenly change his mind but he grabs me by the elbows and pushes me away roughly so that I don't end up hurting myself. Crawling on the ground, he steps back before pulling himself up and staggering but he isn't drunk. He's been drinking but it's not the alcohol that shakes him like this: I recognize the difference, also because I've never seen him in this state. In his big good eyes there is no freshly roasted coffee but boiling petrolium. His expression, a cracked mask of hatred and at the same time authentic desperation, reduced to its core. He trembles in his sweat-soaked undershirt and makes a gesture that he has never deemed necessary in front of me. He hides his hands, trying in vain to put them in his back pockets, like a child caught red-handed. Does he feel reassured by my presence? Is he bothered by it? He's gasping.

Jimmy what… what are you doing? Why?! - I ask him in tears, advancing slowly on my knees. - NO! - he spits out a scream, trying to freeze me in place. - Please… Y/N, no. Enough. That's enough. - I shake my head, I'm confused and I rub my now soaked cheeks. Gray due to the white mixing with the black of the mascara.

- What are you talking about, pleas st-… -

- SHE SCREAMED, Y/N! SHE SCREAMED IN GENUINE TERROR, I TELL YOU!-

- BUT WHO, JAMES?! FOR GOD'S SAKE, WHO?! -

He hates it when I call him James but that seems strangely to appease him. He stares at me like a madman and, in silence, seems to wonder how it is possible that I don't know the circumstances of his delirium but, gradually, lucidity returns and, at the same time, an atrocious sadness. - That… oh, fuck. She was one of the very few people to smile at me and make me sincere wishes. Did she really want to spend time with me… did I fall for it like an idiot? I do not know. It was her! She chose it, I warned her but… - while Jimmy tries to explain, he forgets to hide from me and gesticulates, so I notice a burn on the hand that he was seriously about to cut off. The living flesh fades from red to the paleness of the bladder. Grains of not completely dissolved salt outline the surface like grotesque lace. He must have poured it in. - She took off my glove, alluding to my skills as a pilot but then a heartbreaking scream and… and… I had to let it go. Instead, I tried to calm her down but she…how the fuck is that possible? How did she not know I'm a fucking freak? It was written all over the damn thing! But she knew it. She knew it very well. My attentions were the perfect excuse to defend herself. She called me a monster, a half-man, an abomination and so on, you know, what's new? But then… she burned me with her fucking lantern. You convince yourself that you have a zest, that you are used to it and yet it's not true. And, as with Meep, the day comes when insults are no longer enough. - he doesn't have the courage to look at me but what he says is intimate. Devastating. Shareable. - The bar of wickedness is raised. Of course! That girl wasn't defending herself. She squirted oil on me once, twice, three times. She was torturing me, only stopped because I raised my arms and… the fear came back. She's gone. -

I'm annihilated. Annihilated by what I see and hear, I undergo the hypnosis of Jimmy's pain which soon becomes mine too. His irises are diluted by a sea of tears; suffering makes him unfairly wonderful. In the meantime I have reached him and, from the bottom of my position, I stare at him without embarrassment. I wrap one arm around his knees while the other grabs his good hand and places it on the back of my neck. He wants to take it away, he puts up a feeble resistance but he hears me sobbing and stops immediately. - Yes, Jimmy: her wish was to hurt you. This isn't a party, it's a visit to the slaughterhouse and we are the pigs. As always. - now I hold him with both arms, rubbing my face between his knees. The fabric of his trousers becomes stained white make-up until my skin is almost clean. I raise my head. My face's a palette used between stains that can be washed away and stains that my skin retains.

- Look at me. Are you looking at me? -

- I am. - he says, with the tone of someone who absolutely has to convince you. He hasn't noticed but he's stroking my hair. His eyebrows furrowed and his mouth turned down. -The kindness with which you caress me has never belonged to anyone among the few who have touched me. Not even my mother. - I'm deadly serious. I look at him with watery eyes but it's his tear that rains down my forehead. - Not even to myself. - because I mistreated myself, inflicted physical pain and consequent signatures but he… - If those are really claws, everyone should have them. Maybe they would learn what kindness is. - if I wasn't the one talking to him, he wouldn't believe me. He would mock me, it would be bitter and biting. Instead he fights with the truth that I offer him and stares at me dazed. Almost angry, hunted. The problem is that he believes me, so he picks me up and it's as if he's looking at me for the very first time. His forehead is damp with sweat, so I free his unruly curls before rummaging through my clutch bag. I make sure he follows my gestures and I take out a box of matches: I choose one and place it under the perfect curve of his nose. He flinches but stays as I light the end and, solemnly, set the piñata on fire. While the papier-mâché lobster is devoured by the flames, little by little, melted sweets and chocolate perish in the meadow. Neither of us needs to introduce what's about to happen: just as I stand on tiptoe, he lowers his disheveled head and the tips of our noses meet. It's the last chance to retract before the soft "m" of his upper lip meets my lower lip, dehydrated from makeup. In the first friction there is the disbelief of all the years in which we have not allowed ourselves and then, surrounded by the smell of burning, the kiss intensifies in an unstoppable crescendo. Jimmy wraps his bare arms around my body with the eagerness of someone who must survive. For my part, I let out a moan and cling to his shoulder blades: I realize what I wanted and how much I needed to be satisfied. Jimmy and I share the thrill of the kiss, so much so that he murmurs something incomprehensible against my teeth before parting them with his tongue and searching for mine. He holds my head as if I were water and he was drinking and he doesn't care about the cosmetic taste I have on; his lips turn pale. He slides down my neck without any self-control and I understand that he would take me here, right now. In the midst of the fire. - Wait. - I try to stop him with a deafening smooch. We are out of breath and the air is irrespirable but he stares at me with an imploring look. - How much longer? - he plead. I feel his blood vibrate under his golden skin, between the vertebrae of his broad back. - You have to trust me: I have an idea. - The smoke screen rises towards the sky and us. We… dissolve in the middle.

taglist: @taintandviolent @silverzoomies @doll3tt33 @wh0re43van @fear-is-truth + PLEASE, If you want to be added or I forgot someone, let me know!

#evan peters #american horror story #evan peters fanfic #jimmy darling #ahs freakshow #evan peters smut #jimmy darling x reader #ahs murder house #ahs asylum #ahs hotel #ahs cult #ahs fandom #james patrick march #kit walker #kai anderson #ficfymo #angst #bff to lovers

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taintandviolent · 2 months

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"I can't lose you" and jimmy darling

tw: alcohol mention, drunk!Jimmy Darling, some physical roughness, angst.

It was hotter than the devil’s den and sweat dripped down your spine, disappearing into the fabric of your dress. You stood in his trailer now – Jimmy was by the sofa, and you, by the small kitchenette – feeling like a fool for ever believing him. At his core, Jimmy Darling was a good man, but he was an alcoholic and a liar. He’d promised last Tuesday, after the show, that he wouldn’t drink anymore. He’d promised, perhaps in vain, but he’d promised and you’d taken him seriously.

You’d caught him stumbling back to his trailer in a drunken stupor, and after safely shouldering him inside, you’d told him that you were through - you’d finally had enough.

“I can’t… lose you,” he slurred, bracing himself on the wall, pressing his forearm against the paneling. “Baby… please.”

“Oh, don’t you baby me, Jimmy Darling. Don’t you dare! Really?” You asked, hands shooting down to rest on your hips. Your nose burned, hot with oncoming tears. It killed you, more than anything, to see him - your good boy, your knight in shining armour - like this. Messy, sloppy, and drenched in his own sweat. “Really, Jimmy? Because you seemed fine with losing me when you were emptying those bottles.”

He said nothing, only wavered and stared at you, half-lidded. His hair was a mess; his perfect coifed curls were separated, falling haphazardly over his forehead. He had nothing to defend himself with, nothing you’d listen to anyway. Sure, he could tell you that the little fight you two had had last night had driven him to drink. He could tell you that he hated the way men looked at you during the show, and hated even more how you pandered to them, making them feel like they were special.

He blinked, his eyes wet.

“You’d choose the hooch over me any day of the week, Jimmy.”

He wobbled, swaying on his feet. You rolled your eyes to the heavens, begging whoever was up there for the strength to leave him. After a few minutes of biting down on your lip, you found it, and headed towards the door.

He caught you by the shoulder before you’d reached the door. His fingers dug into your flesh, harder than he’d ever grabbed you. “No, baby, you don’t understand… I can’t lose you. It’ll be the end of me.”

#Jimmy Darling #Jimmy Darling x you #Jimmy Darling x reader #mydrabbles #questions answered #anonymous #angst prompts

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ariespirate · 1 year

Text

i miss you- soft Kai anderson x reader +18 DRAFT not finished

warnings- manipulation, fear, cuddling, mean kai, cursing, crying

cute short smut :)

You sat at home waiting for your boyfriend to get home from his conference. You waited patiently on the bed in your shared bedroom.

you heard the door open

“FUCK” Kai screamed, making you jump at the sudden noise

“Shit shit shit” you whispered to yourself

Kai was your biggest fear. He could be the worst person ever but the sweetest man in the world sometimes. You missed him, you missed the man you met in college, the one who was soft and shy.

You heard stomping coming up the stairs.

The door basically flys open. You freeze.

“Such a perfect doll waiting for me” Kai smirked

“Hi…Kai” you were scared he was mad

“How was your day” you said quietly

“Ohh it was peachy” the man said sarcastically

“Are you ok” you could barley make out words at this point

“NO IM NOT FUCKING OK I THOUGHT YOU WERE SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT” Kai screamed at you, making you flinch at the loudness

You start crying because of how much you’ve been nagged on, you were over it you couldn’t do it anymore

“Kai I’m sorry” you finally got words out

He walked closer grabbing you face to make you look at him

“Look how pathetic” he was hurting you now

“Please” you begged

“I’ve had a rough day and I need something to take it out on” Kai said now gripping you hair tightly

“Kai please” you whispered

“What did you call me” kai asked

“Divine ruler” you reworded your words

“Good girl” he said in a pleasing tone

…… should I finish this?

#evan peters #ahs fandom #jimmy darling #kai anderson #kai anderson smut #ahsfx #evan peters blurb #ahs fanfic #ahs murder house #ahs asylum #ahsedit #ahs smut #ahs coven #ahs cult #ahs freakshow #kai angst #kai ahs #american horror story

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iheartyouyou · 1 year

Text

Judas | Jimmy Darling

Summary: Elsa and Richard (Stanley) frame you for murdering Jimmy’s mother.

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: angst, mention of death, maybe more idk (not proofread)

Author’s Note: I don’t think there’s a bathroom in Jimmy’s trailer, but let’s pretend there is just for the sake of this fic. This was just a random idea I had and i love writing angst. Anyway, please leave feedback <3

Your eyes flutter open from the loud slam, a sudden hand grabs your arm, man-handling you out of bed.

Before you know it, you’re outside. Your eyes adjust to the new setting, everybody’s eyes on you as they form a group around you.

You look to see that Eve had both of your arms pinned behind your back, confusion hitting you.

You try to shuffle out of her strong grip, but it was no use.

“We took you in! How could you do this to her— to us?” Elsa shrieks, breaking down as she falls to her knees. Your boyfriend, Jimmy, is immediately by her side, placing a comforting hand in her shoulder as he glares at you with tears in his eyes.

“Wait— what happened?” You ask, trying to jump forward to reach your boyfriend. The grip on your arms only gets tighter.

“Don’t act stupid, Y/N. Give up the act.” Jimmy shouts, now standing up. You flinch at the harshness in his tone.

You look around the group, your eyes landing on Richard. He had a stupid smirk on his face, standing next to him was Maggie, a guilty look on hers.

“What act? I don’t even know what’s happening!” You cry, turning your head to stare up at Eve. You give her a pleading look. She looks away, shaking her head.

Elsa continued her sobs, chanting a prayer.

“What’s happening?” You shriek, watching as Maggie comforted Jimmy.

You furrowed your eyebrows, jealousy running through your veins. Ever since Maggie came, you’ve always been jealous.

She was a pretty girl and Jimmy was a handsome guy. Before you and Jimmy started dating, he was known as a womanizer. Flirting with every girl he set his eyes on and sleeping with every girl who flirted back.

You met him during one of your shifts as a waitress at the Camellia Grill. He flirted with you in hopes of not having to pay his bill, but you met guys like him. You told him the price of the food he ordered with a smirk on your face, watching in satisfaction as he slammed his money on the counter before leaving.

He came back the next day, requested that you served him and tried the same thing. He ended up paying again, but then he returned the day after, flirting with you once again.

Jimmy was confused. And hurt. He got every girl he wanted, his charms and good looks were the only thing he needed. But when you quickly shut him down, he felt like it was a mission to charm you.

He didn’t know what he wanted— wether that was a free bill or a kiss, or something even more than that— he didn’t care. It started off as a silly mission, but ended with you finally letting him leave without paying.

He didn’t come in the next day, which left you hurt. You knew he only wanted something, and he finally got it. Weeks of coming in, requesting you served him, flirting, just for a free bill?

You didn’t want to admit it, but you missed seeing his stupid face and the stupid mittens he would wear even though it was hotter than ever outside. He never told you why he wore them.

But one day, one of your co-workers gave you a note. They said it was from that handsome guy who always wanted you as his server. You practically ripped open the note, reading his sloppy handwriting.

He asked on the note if you could meet him outside when you were done with your shift.

When you shift was done, you headed outside to meet him. He was sitting on one of the benches, his face lightening up when he saw you.

He confessed his love to you, telling you he had to tell you before it was too late. You were so happy, the largest grin etched onto your lips. It quickly fell though when he told you that you guys couldn’t be together.

Jimmy didn’t want to explain why. He knew the second he removed those mittens you would freak out and leave him. A pretty girl like you couldn’t be seen with a freak like him.

You wanted to scream and slap him in the face, telling him to leave and never come back.

He couldn’t stand seeing you so sad, so before you could slap him he dragged you into the nearest alleyway and removed his mittens.

You let out the biggest gasp when you saw his lobster hands.

Jimmy quickly frowned, he couldn’t watch you run away from him so he looked away to save him the pain.

What took him by surprise though was when you took one of his hands, pressing your soft lips to them in a kiss.

You watch as the group separates, revealing the deceased body of Ethel. Jimmy’s mother.

You shriek, crying as you stare at the knife that was in her eye. “What happened to her? Who did this?”

Elsa abruptly stands up, stalking towards you. She points an accusing finger at you, angry tears running down her face. “You’re a monster. What type of human being would do this to someone? She was innocent, happy. The only freak here is you.”

“What?! I didn’t do that!” You shout, being released from Eva’s grip. She pushes you down, causing you to land on your knees.

You quickly get up, eyes finding Jimmy’s. “Jimmy? Baby?” You whimper.

“You are a monster! A MONSTER!” You hear Elsa shriek, pointing her finger into your chest.

You slap her hand away, “I didn’t do anything!”

“Maggie said she saw you stab Ethel this morning when she was in the woods.” Richard claims, your eyes snapping to Maggie’s.

Jimmy and her were hugging, his face nestled into the crook of her neck. She stares at you, a frown etched onto her lips.

“I didn’t do that! I was asleep—“ You point to Jimmy’s trailer, “In there! Jimmy was with me!”

Elsa laughs, “Really? Because if I can recall, Jimmy was rehearsing this morning.”

“I was asleep! You really think I would kill her? That doesn’t even make sense, she was like a mother to me!” You whimpered, wiping your nose with the back of your hand.

Silence takes over, the only thing being heard was Jimmy’s cried and your sniffling.

“I didn’t kill her!” You shriek, staring at the dead body. You look up at Richard, a mischievous grin on his face. He clicks his tongue, shaking his head.

“You— you asshole!” You snap, watching as his grin slightly fell. “He’s framing me! He’s framing me! You have to believe me—“

“Put her on the spin wheel.” Elsa says calmly, fixing her hair as she smiles.

“What? What—“ You feel the same two arms, Eva, grab into yours, dragging you to the tent. “No! I didn't do anything! Jimmy!” You cried, trying to kick Eva. “Let go of me!”

You somehow kick Eva in the shin, causing her to groan. You slip out of her arms, making a run for it. You run past the group, but before you could make an exit the familiar arms of your so called boyfriend wrap around you. You struggle in his arms, crying.

“Let go of me! Please!” You wailed, trying to elbow him.

Normally, butterflies would be flying around in your stomach from Jimmy hugging you from behind. But now it was making you sick.

“Jimmy, please! I didn’t kill her, I promise. I love you— please!” You say, trying to convince him as he brings you back towards the tent. “Baby, please.”

“Shut up!” He shouts. He finally lets go, only to strap you on the wheel.

“Please.” You beg, struggling against his hold. He avoids your eyes, strapping you. “I didn’t kill her!” You scream for the millionth time, heart dropping as you watched Elsa hold up a knife.

She mimics throwing it at you, closing one if her eyes and she squints with the other.

Jimmy finally looks at you.

“jimmy, please. i didn’t kill her, he’s framing me. i don’t wanna die.” You whisper, your voice cracking. An emotion flashed in his eyes, quickly disappearing.

“Please.” You beg one last time.

“Rot in hell.” He seethed, “You’re gonna die.” He walks away, sitting down.

“Jimmy!” You scream. “No! Please!”

He ignores your pleads, looking down at his lap.

He loved you— he loves you. But his mom has been there for him ever since day one. If it were anyone but you, he would probably kill them himself. Elsa insisted she practice her act on you, before ending your life with a few knives to your body, letting you bleed out.

You look at Pepper. “Pepper? Hey! Remember when I made you that bow? The one you’re wearing? Get me down! Please!”

Pepper hesitates, looking at Salty. They share a look, but before they could do anything Richard stands in front of them, encouraging them to sit down.

“No! You fucking asshole!”

He smiles at you, walking towards you. “It’s unfortunate that your life has to end this way. Don’t worry, your lobster boy will be joining you soon.” He whispers, reaching over to spin the wheel.

“I knew it! You asshole, I fucking hate you!” You shriek, going upside down, then up, then upside down…

“I don’t know what she’s talking about.” He shrugs, backing away.

“He’s framing me- AH!” You shriek, the first knife thrown at you stabbing the wood beside your head.

“I can’t concentrate when you’re talking.” Elsa says, she stops the spinning, shoving a handkerchief into your mouth.

She spins the wheel again, “that’s much better.”

Your pleads are now muffled, the only thing going through your mind was that you were too young to die.

Another knife gets thrown your way, stabbing the wood on the other side of your face. You were getting a headache now from the spinning.

You stop your pleads, shutting your eyes as you accepted your fate.

You should’ve refused to serve Jimmy the second time he came.

You should’ve gotten another job.

You should’ve re—

“Wait! Elsa— stop!” You hear Jimmy’s voice. Jesus, were you now imagining things?

“What are you doing?” You hear Elsa snap.

You were now imagining Elsa’s voice? You didn’t want her voice to be the last thing you ever heard.

You suddenly stop spinning, your eyes snapping open as you meet Jimmy’s.

“Shit…” He mutters, unbuckling the straps. He looks at you, frowning. “I’m so sor—“

“What are you doing?!” Elsa repeats, pushing Jimmy out of the way. Her face was red, smoke practically coming out of her ears.

Jimmy pushes her back, sending her to the ground. Elsa looks up a him, betrayal written all over her face.

“Maggie told me everything.” He snaps, turning to look at the rest of the group. “Unstrap her.”

Pepper immediately skips to you, Eve following.

Eve takes the handkerchief out of your mouth, throwing it somewhere behind you.

“W-what’s happening?” You ask, Pepper taking your hand to lead you away from the wheel as you were unbuckled.

“Yes, what is happening?” Richard asks, standing up from his seat. You watch as Maggie tells him something, a smile forming on her lips as Richard freezes.

Pepper leaves you with Salty, skipping back to Jimmy. He tells her something, motioning to you before looking back at Elsa’s figure on the ground. You watch as he tells Eve something. Eve nods, lifting Elsa up.

“Desiree— what’s happening?” You ask nervously, scared of what she was going to say. Were they planning on killing you some other brutal way? Chop of your limbs? Bury you alive?

Desiree stares at her husband who was now manhandling Richard. “You don’t wanna know.”

“But I do! What the hell is happening?” You insist.

Pepper comes skipping back, taking your hand once again and starts leading you out of the tent. Salty follows.

You were beyond confused. One second you’re on you’re death bed, or should you say death wheel and now you’re being lead back to Jimmy’s trailer.

Oh god, were they going to kill you in his trailer? Maybe you can make a run for it?

They lead you into his trailer, helping you sit on the bed. Pepper grabs the blanket that was near you, handing it to you as Salty grabs a pillow.

“I don’t… I don’t understand.” You speak, dropping the pillow Salty gave you to the side.

“S…. safe! Safe!” Pepper says excitedly. Salty and her jump around the trailer, giggling.

They stop when the door swings open, revealing Paul. “Hey, Y/N. Are yo—“

“What’s going on?” You ask. You said that phrase a lot today, it seemed like you only knew those three words.

He hesitates for a moment, moving the pillow beside you to take seat. He shushes Pepper and Salty, turning to you.

“You didn’t kill Ethel.”

“I know that. That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you guys.” You snap, almost feeling bad when Paul slightly flinches. He frowns.

“I know and we’re taking care of them.”

Your eyebrows furrow, “Taking care of who?”

“Elsa and Richard… or Stanley.”

“What are you guys doing to them—“

“Jimmy said not to tell ya.”

You sigh, rubbing your temples. You had the largest headache, from all the yelling, pleading, spinning… so much has happened and it hadn’t even been an hour since you woke up.

You stand up, almost falling from how dizzy you were.

“Hey, where ar—“ Paul starts, reaching out to you.

“I need to pee.” You mumble, backing away. You stumble to the bathroom, slamming the door as you slide against it to the ground.

You were confused, hurt, dizzy and exhausted all at the same time. It’s crazy how they just believed anything they heard, believing that you actually killed Ethel. And the fact that Jimmy— your boyfriend who is supposed to love and support you just believed them? Without no proof? Without even talking to you? He was supposed to trust and defend you. And everybody else? They just simply believed their lies. You have done so much for everybody, and they all just sit there and watch you almost get killed.

Nice to know they would most likely throw you under the bus if something like this happened again.

“Baby?” You hear, along with a knock.

You didn’t realize how long you were in the bathroom, zoning out as thoughts flooded your mind.

“Y/N?” You hear Jimmy speak from the other side of the door. The doorknob shakes. “I’m so sorry.”

You stay silent, bringing your knees up to your chest.

“Baby? Can you please come out? O-or let me in?” He says, trying the doorknob once again.

You stare at the window. You knew you were right when you first saw Jimmy Darling. He is just like any other guy, only wanting one thing and willing to throw you under the bus.

“Please? I can explain everything, I promise sweetheart. I’ll make it up to you.”

You get up, cautiously moving to the window while looking at the door. It could open any minute. You climb on top of the toilet, opening the window but stopping when it creeks.

“Y/N?”

Opening the rest of the window slowly, you peek your head out to make sure the coast was clear before somehow climbing out. The window was kind of small and only opened to a certain point.

You climb out head first, falling to the ground with a groan. Still, you get up. You look around, hearing Jimmy’s faint voice coming from the inside of his trailer before making a run to the main road.

#jimmy darling #jimmy darling x reader #evan peters #evan peters x reader #james patrick march #kai anderson #ahs #american horror story #ahs freakshow #freakshow #freak show #jimmy darling imagine #tate langdon #kyle spencer #angst #imagine #evan peters imagine

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her-favorite · 1 year

Note

Yayy so glad to hear you're writing for the Evans again!!! To celebrate that, can I pls request an angst story about reader in Briarcliff being defended and covered up for some stupid fault by Kit Walker who gets in trouble in her place? Thank you sm!!

Kit Walker x F!Reader

Summary: A mistake you had made went south, but Kit couldn't stand seeing you in pain..

Warnings: sister Jude, canning, kit being adorable, I like making kit's Boston accent really noticeable bc its hot so

a/n: im so glad to be getting evan requests again!!

You sat in the common room, relaxing against the couch in the middle of the room. You fidgeted with the skin that was peeling on the side of your finger while you waited for time to pass. The music blasted from the record player, seeing people dance and wander around out of the corner of your eye.

You wouldn't like to admit it, but you've been waiting for Kit Walker to walk through those heavy doors any minute now. You've been here longer than the man, but nothing ever gets easier. The day that Kit had stepped through the doors, you had an immediate liking toward the man. Not just because of how handsome he is, but because you could read his body language and how he clearly was very tense.

Your thoughts were cut off when you heard the big doors creak to your right. Your head shot up to look and see who came in. Your hopes were crushed, though, as you didn't see the brown haired man walk through the space in-between. Your mind raced through different situations of why Kit wasn't here yet. Your thoughts quickly went to the negative solution, but you shut your eyes closed to try and push it away.

Your eyes danced across the large room, trying to look for a familiar face. They stopped once you saw Lana sitting at an empty table, a cigarette between her two fingers and smoke puffing from her parted lips. She made quick eye contact with you, sending a short smile your way. You sent one back before letting your eyes wander again.

Should I go look for him?

Your gut was telling you to, but your mind said no. You knew that if you got caught, you were in for a punishment. But it would be worth it if you were able to find Kit again.

It had already passed the time when they gave out medicine, so you were really getting nervous. You debated your options again, playing this or that. You were no stranger to the canes that Sister Jude had, being here for a little over a year. You were framed for a murder and the cops had quickly believed the man who had made up false claims without listening to anything you had to say.

You stood up from the soft cloth of the couch, being very aware of your surroundings. The guards weren't paying attention to anyone, being too immersed in their own conversations. You opened the door as fast as you could, quickly, but quietly shutting the door once you left.

You knew about the experiments that Dr. Arden had practiced on Kit. He tells you everything that happens to him in the asylum, you being the only person he truly trusts in this hellhole. You had never trusted the Doctor from the start, having bad feeling about him. You were nervous the older man had him.

You silently made your way through the long halls of the building, stopping every now and then to make sure you didn't hear any footsteps near you.

You finally made your way around a corner, looking left to right again and again. You rounded the open door frame of the bakery, but immediately paused once you heard rustling from inside. You were already through the doorway, so there was no backing out now.

Your eyes scattered the room until they landed on a man's back. Your eyes narrowed in on it, focusing in on the light blue button-up shirt and the fading navy blue jeans that wrinkled when he bent over to pick up a cloth that fell from the metal table.

"Kit?" You whispered, your voice quiet, anxiety rising if it wasn't him. The man turned around, fast, and locked eyes with you. A smiled broke out on your face and you quickly walked over to him and wrapped him up in a hug. "I was so worried about you, I thought you were with the doctor or something bad happened to you." You ramble, leaning back to cup his face and move his head around to see if he had any marks or bruises.

Just the one on his lip from earlier.

"Relax, suga'." He chuckled, never taking his arms away from there place around your waist. "I'm alright, just had a slow mornin' and was sent to clean up around here." He explained, eyes flickering between both of yours. You let out a breath of relief, returning his sweet smile. His dimples showed, making your smile wider.

Before you guys could talk or even move, you heard a sound from the doorway. You froze for a second, looking at Kit's eyes which were on the person that had saw you two. You got out of his embrace, moving to stand beside him to see who it was.

A guard stood there, briskly reaching for his belt incase he needed his gun. "What're you two doin' in here alone?" He asks, yelling down the hallway for someone to help him.

Guess you could never be too safe.

There was fast movement in the hallway before you could try and answer his question. The men quickly moved towards you and Kit, one of them grabbing your arms and the other grabbing Kit's. You both protested, but they weren't having any of it.

Next thing you knew, you stood in Sister Jude's office with Kit, your hands restrained together. You went to open your mouth to apologize to Kit, but the door behind you squeaked open. You both turned towards it, watch Jude tut at you both.

"You two can never keep it in your pants." She shakes her head in disgust. "You weren't supposed to be in there, wandering the halls like it's some circus." She pointed at you, then at Kit. "And you should've been doing your job. Too distracted by your lust." You let out a frustrated breath, trying to keep your mouth shut. You looked over at Kit who glared at the blonde woman. "Come on, over the desk. Now."

You obeyed, bending over the wooden desk. You rested your head to your right so you could look towards Kit instead of the woman. He leaned over as well, making eye contact with you. You felt his residence of the whole situation, but you weren't sure what he was thinking at the moment.

"20 each. Ready-" Kit stood up from his position before she could finish.

"Y/N, stand up. Stand up." His hands that were stuck in the cuffs tried to reach out to you. You did what he said, giving him a look of confusion. Your eyebrows furrowed, asking him a silent question. His eyes flickered between you and Sister Jude. "It wasn't her, she didn't do nothin' wrong." He stared Jude down. "I persuaded her to come down to the bakery and help me, that's why she was with me and not in the common room. It's my fault, sista'. Just don't hurt her." He lied, never once looking at you until he was finished. Before you could say anything, Jude looked over at you.

"Is that true, Y/L/N?" She raised her eyebrows. You looked over in Kit's direction, seeing him discreetly nod. You sighed, but nodded at her question. "Okay, well, that's 20 each, so 40 for you." She moved to face Kit again. "And you stay here and watch." She pointed at you.

I think I'd rather get caned than watch him get hurt.

You sat in the common room again, impatiently bouncing your leg up and down as you waited for him to come back. You imagined he needed a little bit of time to try and get used to the pain that he just endured.

Your head shot up when you heard the doors open, watching Kit walk in with his normal outfit on. He scanned the room until he saw you, a soft smile forming on his face. He made his way over towards you, sitting down right next to you, grabbing a cigarette and quickly lighting it. His arm went around the back of the couch, caging you in.

"Why would you do that? Take the fall for me?" You scolded him, lightly slapping his knee that was bent to rest on his other leg. He chuckled slightly, moving his cigarette into his left hand to rest his right on your hand.

"'Cause I hate seeing' you in pain, doll." He took a drag from his stick. "If I can save you from that sufferin', then I will gladly take the chance." He explained, watching your reaction.

Your once-tense shoulders relaxed sightly and your clenched jaw let go. You sighed, resting your body back against the couch, your head leaning against his arm that was still draped there. "I'm sorry, I just get so worried about you." You confess, scratching at the rough fabric of Kit's jeans on his thigh.

He leaned forward to put his cig out, moving back to properly wrap his arm around your shoulder and bring you closer to him. "I know, sweetheart, but I feel the same way about you, that's why I gotta do stuff like that; make sure you don't hurt that cute butt." He was teasing you, making you smile and hit his leg again. He laughed, but squeezed your shoulders. "No, but seriously, doll, I really do care about'cha. I don't think I'd be able to let myself live if I was the reason you got hurt." He kissed your head, rubbing circles with his thumb on your shoulder. You look up at him, noticing how he's already staring at you.

You quickly look around the room, but move back towards Kit as you press your lips against his. He froze for a second, before kissing back with a smile on his face.

As long as he's here, maybe Briarcliff won't be too bad..

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icannot3 · 9 months

Text

"Apologies and Tire-Swings"

Jimmy Darling x Reader

Word count: 3.1k (another long one wooo I'm on a roll)

Warnings: there's arguing? Idk if that should be a warning or not lmao. It ends on a good note!!! So no worries hehe

Taglist: @taintandviolent @lilthbunny @quickandsilvers @kaismanwich (comment if you'd like to be added!)

....................

The humid summer Florida air is where you find yourself feeling most at peace, among the many you love. There's nothing extravagant about your lifestyle, yet there's a deep level of contempt that radiates through you with warm, fuzzy delight that's hard to beat. Blood relations are irrelevant. Your family has always been within the circus, among the socially unacceptable that are all bonded by the oppression they face in the real world. It sparks a deep level of understanding and trust that can never be broken.

Being born and raised around the same people for eighteen years, you only found that Jimmy could hold such a special place in your heart, different from the others. A friendship that roots deeply into your childhood, flourishing through your teens and carrying now into young adulthood. Jimmy, your partner in crime, your sanction. Hell, your soulmate and other half. He was there through all of the good and the bad. There to wipe your tears when you were still scared of stages, there to cheer you on, there to beat up shitty ex-lovers and remind you how you always deserved better.

Truly, you have no clue what you would do without him.

Nothing brings up the pleasant feeling of nostalgia every summer like the first show of the year. You've been practicing your act since last season. As a contortionist, learning flips to impress the crowd in different ways is a necessity. You take pride in the fact that you managed to learn how to gracefully aerielle across the stage during the cold winter months. Jimmy, of course, was a big help, always spotting you and never letting you fall. He himself learned a couple more juggling tricks. Despite his talent, he still gets unbearably shy about showcaseing it every season.

Performance night is finally here after your long anticipated await. Jimmy is before you, which is how it's always been. Elsa is a woman of order who wouldn't dare to switch up the original line, even despite Jimmy's pleas against going first immediately after her opening. You hold one of his large hands between your own two. He's shaking but trying to play it off, yet another tradition before every show. You stroke his thumb, trying to ease his worries.

"Jimmy, I just know you're gonna do great! Just like every year. You've never disappointed." Your voice comes out as an encouraging whisper in order to not be heard over Elsa's singing. Jimmy swallows harshly, his breathing coming out in deep, shakey exhales. It's a method he's used since he was young to calm himself, something his mother taught him.

Elsa's singing comes to a grand end, colorful confetti exploding everywhere. Her beautiful performance brings an inspired uproar from the crowd. You release Jimmy's hand, stepping in front of him. He quickly grabs his props, the small box full of them almost slipping from his trembling hands. "You say that every year."

You chuckle, fixing his hair back to perfection by readjusting his curls. "And every year, I mean it just the same. Blow their minds, Jimmy. There's a reason you go first." Before he can even argue against your statement, his name is called onto the stage. You cheer behind the stage with the crowd, giving him one final push of encouragement. He's good at hiding his panic, smoothly proceeding to the middle of the platform and reciting his lines. He only stutters once but is quick to get back on track and play it off. You couldn't be more proud.

His hands work magic, although you can hardly see the shadow figures he uniquely creates with the florescent lights, the crowd gasps in awe, which tells you enough. He ends the first part of his act with a joke that makes many in the tent chuckle before moving on to the part he stresses over most. His worries are pointless. He takes three balls in his hands to start, tossing them skillfully in the air.

Jimmy is sweating, deeply concentrated on his task. So much so that he stood no chance when a foreign object in the crowd strikes him in the face. It's luckily not enough to hurt him, but the balls he once held fall to the ground and roll off the stage. You gasp, stunned by the ignorance of the act. Jimmy's concentrated face switches from that to one full of rage. He clenches his fists so tightly his knuckles turn white.

"Do something entertaining, freak!"

It's a deep masculine voice from the crowd. You share Jimmy's rage, wanting to scream at whoever dares to speak to him in such a manner. Part of you panics when you see Jimmy walk to the very front of the stage, his murderous rage clearly radiating across the room. "The fuck did you just say to me? I'll kick your ass!" Jimmy's shout booms intimidatingly across the room. Everyone knows that his threat is far from empty. You hear Elsa run across the stage, the hurried clanking of her heels being easy to distinguish. She makes an apologetic remark before escorting Jimmy away. He doesn't do much to fight her, but his piercing eyes never lose sight of the man in the crowd.

You take the backstage route off of the stage and search for Jimmy outside. Your act won't take place for a good while, so you know you have time to spare. He's mumbling something under his breath in a frustrated manner. You trot over to him, immediately placing a hand on his shoulder. "Jimmy, I'm so sorry, are you okay?"

He doesn't respond, flinching away from your touch instead. Jimmy continues to quickly trudge forward, eventually meeting a tree. He punches it hard. The bark crumbles away from the place of impact as he grabs his red knuckles. You once again run back up to him, putting yourself between him and the tree. "Jimmy, stop! You're hurting yourself."

"I can't keep doing this. I won't be treated that way - it ain't right." He sounds so hopeless, like the fire within him has been put out. His hot rage has simmered down to defeated ashes that fall to the ground. His eyes are red, and the sight brings you pain. You try to bring a hand to his cheek to wipe away the moisture, but he pushes it away. "Jimmy, you can't let this stuff bother you so much. It's not worth it."

He scoffs, taking a step away from you. "Like you would ever fucking know what it feels like." Jimmy looks away, his annoyance clear in his movements. "You're not a freak. You never have been. You have no clue what it's like to be looked down on. When you walk through town, no one says a damn thing or stares at you like you're a monster. You don't ever have to worry about goin' into a diner and being denied service because of how you look." His words are true. You were adopted into the circus only because you were dropped off and abandoned next to one as a baby of only a few hours old. It just so happened that you were born with the skill of extreme flexibility. But his statement hurts like a knife twisting inside of your chest. "I know, I'm not taking away from what you go through at all. I'm just saying that at the end of the day, none of this matters. No one in that crowd matters, Jimmy! Nothing bad they say about you is true, that just comes with this career."

"Well, maybe I'm not like you, and I don't want to be cooped up in some dead-end circus where I get disrespected the moment I walk on stage." Jimmy delivers his final blow before stomping in the opposite direction. "Go back to your fucking show." Immediate rage fills you whole. He's never spoken to you in such a way. For that matter, the two of you have never even argued. You feel wronged, and the shock leaves you infuriated. You can almost pull your hair out from frustration. It was only your intention to help him, and he took it to the extremes. Instead of arguing more with him, which feels like speaking to a brick wall, you head back to the tent to finish the night and hopefully blow off some steam. When you return, no one dares to utter a word about your disappearance once they see your agitated state.

Even weeks later, you couldn't help but wonder if Jimmy had always perceived you in such a foul manner. You feel judged and betrayed when thinking back on it. The stubbornness you both share in common has left things silent between you both, not a single word uttered about the matter. Even Ethel was beginning to grow worried, as the two of you before were inseparable. Eve stopped you the one day, appearantly she tried to pry the issue out of Jimmy first but he refused to even discuss the matter. You simply told her that he needed to get over himself without much further explanation, which left anyone invested in the drama all the more confused.

Jimmy, out of rebellion, decided to stop performing in shows. This did little to keep the peace between he and Elsa. She would push him, but with that, Jimmy would shove and dissappear for days on end. Everyone was growing increasingly concerned, and you wouldn't have agreed to speak to Jimmy had Ethel herself not come to you personally; worried sick for her son. She explained how she believes you're truly the only one who can talk any sense to him. And how could you say no to the woman who practically raised you?

You decided to leave a note on the door on Jimmy's camper, which was a request to meet you at a nearby lake. You inquire that it would make you feel better about meeting him if he shows the mutual effort of trying to reconnect by coming. The spot holds a special sentiment between you two. Each summer in your youth was spent there for hours each day until the sun went down, having the time of your lives. Your heart flutters when you immediately find the old tire-swing still up on the same tree. You don't dare to touch it, scared the weakened rope would snap. All of the pleasant memories would be shattered. Jimmy was always such a gentleman when he was younger. He'd push you on that swing for hours if you asked him, never requesting you do the same in return.

You wait for an hour, maybe two. With night approaching and the soothing sound of the frogs chirping, you nearly fell asleep. Until you heard the quiet rustling of greenery behind you. There Jimmy stood, for a moment you almost entirely forgot about the dispute. A shred of happiness sprouted from seeing him in this place again after many years of abandonment. Although he'd grown into a young man, you could still make out the softness left in his cheeks and warmth in his smile that remained from all those many years ago. Jimmy wordlessly seats himself beside you. This is the closest you two have been to each other in a while.

"Can't believe that tire swing is still up." Jimmy opts to break the silence. "It was hardly even hangin' on when we were kids." You melt, finally realizing how much you missed just talking to him. It puts your soul at ease. "Yeah, I wonder how skinny we must have been to be able to both squeeze in the center of that thing." Jimmy chuckles with you, the night air causing the swing to flow with the wind. Another string of awkward tension fills the silence. So many things fly through your mind as you try to think of what to say. Jimmy himself seems lost in his silence. You wonder if he's thinking the same thing.

"I'm sorry about everything. How I came off wasn't my intention. I don't fully understand your struggles, and I don't have a right to act like I do." You scooch closer to him, allowing his body to block some of the chilly breeze. "But because I don't understand what you go through, I just want you to know that you can always talk to me, okay? I want to understand so I can help. You know you can tell me anything, right?" Jimmy stares at you, his eyes traveling from your eyes to the ground.

He stretches his arm out, allowing you to fully lean in as he surrounds you with his warmth. The hug is comforting and fills you with relief. "Well, I acted like an ass. So, really, I should be apologizing. I didn't mean anything I said, I was angry and lost control of my words, and I just - I'm sorry." He rubs over the goosebumps on your arms, smoothing them out with his warmth. "I should have just told you what was botherin' me." You cock a brow in his direction, urging him to go on.

"Honestly, I feel so trapped here. It's like I have no choice over what I do with my life. Sometimes I think about runnin' away, somewhere that I can get a house and a real job. Have a family, a wife. Hell, maybe even a dog." This makes you giggle, Jimmy's always wanted a dog. Once, he tried to take in a stray until his mother found out he was hiding it in her trailer. She came home to discover her new pillows torn to shreds on the ground. It's safe to say he was not allowed to keep the poor sucker. "Point is, I wanna see what's out there. Maybe with you. I just took it way outta proportion and hurt you in the process when you had no clue."

You lean into his shoulder, pulling him in tightly. "Oh, Jimmy... There's absolutely nothing wrong with that." You shake your head. "I want you to be happy, and I'll support you every step of the way." His breathing halts for just a few seconds. You would have missed it if your head wasn't pressed against his chest. He's shakey, a lot like how he gets before a performance. You can tell something else is bothering him. But instead of prying him for a reason, you sit in silence, waiting for him to share what he's comfortable with. A few minutes are in silence, just the two of you basking in the affection of one another.

"Every time I think about runnin' away, I think about doing it with you." He's quiet, his words slow and calculated. The thought makes your head spin and chest feel tight. Except it's not a bad feeling. You embrace it like a warm blanket. "There's another thing I haven't told you."

Jimmy pulls you a little tighter, as if he's scared that if he lets go, you'll escape. "Truth is, I'm so damn in love with you it hurts. I have been since we were kids. I've been threatening your boyfriends for years to make them leave so that I could have you all to myself, as terrible as that is to say." His hand strokes your hair as he places his chin over your head. You can feel his heart rate accelerate, but you're confident that it isn't nearly as fast as your own. "I've loved you since we were too young to even know what that word means, all the way back to when we'd play tag in these fields unsupervised and laugh together for hours." He takes one final deep breath. "I don't ever wanna live a life without you, and I'll stay here forever if that's what you want because you mean the world to me. And if having you means that I gotta get up and sing or juggle on a stage every now and then, I'll gladly do that."

You're stunned, flustered beyond the point of recuperating. You begin to question every idea of friendship you've ever had with Jimmy. And you come to realize that you've been in love with Jimmy from the moment you met him. It was just seen as a forbidden thing you wouldn't dare to explore. But really, there was no use in that because he already had. This entire time. Jimmy Darling loves you in more than just a platonic way, and you couldn't be happier sitting between his arms in this moment knowing that fact.

His hand, his beautiful perfect hand, traces along your jaw. He motions for you to tilt towards his face. You allow him, letting his thumb graze over your bottom lip so delicately you could cry. His nose grazes against your own, the playful sentiment making you smile. Jimmy takes this as an opportunity. His lips capture your own tenderly. It's addictive, like the sweetest liquor in town that you just can't get enough of. He's caressing your cheek, taking his time melting into your touch. By the end of it, he has you completely breathless, but then he eagerly continues for more. He nibbles your lower lip, deepening the longing you feel for him. You wrap your hands around his back. Without a word, he's laying you on top of the soft grass and hungrily having his way, trailing an assortment of kisses and teasing bites down your neck. It's heavenly, a feeling you're sure you couldn't experience with any other.

A loud crash frightens you, followed by the harsh splash of something colliding with water. Jimmy covers you with his body, scouting the area of any danger. Pinned underneath of him, you're unable to see what's going on. Until you hear his hysterical laughter before he rolls off of you. Sitting up, you see for yourself what is responsible for the sound.

The damn tire-swing. Its time had finally come to an end, the rope seems to have snapped, and there it went, rolling into the lake. You found yourself not as upset about it as you thought you'd be, laughing along with him. Once you finally come out of your hysterics, you roll over and lay against Jimmy's chest, throwing a leg over his own. He rubs small circles into your back, savoring every second.

"I knew that thing was gonna fall."

#evan peters #fluff #ahs #american horror story #jimmy darling #jimmy darling x reader #jimmyyyy #jimmy darling fluff #angst

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evan4ever · 1 year

Text

Vegas, baby

Part 5 — part 4 here

Warnings: pregnancy, none really

a/n: sorry this chapter is a bit boring, promise it’ll get intense soon! and please excuse any errors 🫶🏻

—

Your POV

You paced back and forth in your room while Shayla now sat at the end of your bed watching you. She was just as nervous as you, hoping that even though the message was from Sarah Paulson verified Instagram, that it was legit. Not some scam that was going to throw you back 10 steps rather than what could be a step closer to the outcome you were desperate for.

Your heart beat faster with every ring on the other line, worry setting in that she may not pick up and that you were wasting your time. What if this was pointless you thought. What if it was a harsh joke and you would end up back to square one -

“Hello, y/n” a friendly voice interrupted your negative thoughts and you were stuck not knowing what to say when you realized Sarah Paulson was quite literally on the other line of the phone. “Are you there?”

You breathed in quickly and nodded, as if she could see you. “I… yeah. Hi.” You cleared your throat awkwardly still not sure what to say but remembering that she was pretty much in control of what might happen. “I’m here”

“Fantastic! It is so great to talk to you, thank you for trusting me and giving me a call.” Your nerves slowly dissipated at her friendliness.

“Yeah, thanks for getting ahold of me.”

“Of course. So, I suppose I’ll get straight to the point?” You both chuckled nervously but you stayed quiet to allow her to continue. “I’ve read something on the news as I’m sure you’ve seen is all over. I do hope it isn’t causing you any trouble, considering you seemed pretty adamant about staying quiet in the video when Evan’s name was brought up. I have to ask — are you 100% sure the child is his? That your friend or whomever the woman in the video who called him out was wasn’t only joking around and it happened to go viral?”

You were slightly annoyed that anyone would think you’d by lying about something like this but quickly remembered that she’s only making sure for the sake of her friend. “Yes. I’m positive it’s Evan’s. I have tried reaching out to him any way that I could, but he’s pretty hard to reach.. all things considered.”

“Absolutely. That’s why I reached out. I apologize on his behalf for being hard to contact, but I do appreciate that you have tried. So the next step I suppose would be to meet up? I’m sure there’s plenty Evan and yourself need to talk about. We could come to you.”

Your heart nearly popped out of your chest at her words. You knew the point of the conversation was to help you and Evan figure things out, but the fact that they will come to you? To your hometown? And you’d get to see him again? Your mind quickly went back almost 9 months ago to that night in Vegas. You didn’t feel anything for him then, but now that he was going to come and possibly be in your guys’ baby’s life, in your life, you couldn’t help but feel your stomach explode into butterflies. Yet your mind reminded you to forget that this could go one of two ways and to be prepared. It was an ugly battle between your head and your heart.

“Are you there?” Sarah’s question brought you back and you cleared your throat.

“Yeah! Sorry. Um that sounds… that sound really great. I’m in your/home/state. Sorry that you guys have to take the time to do this.” You apologized and genuinely meant it. It probably wasn’t the best timing for them considering it wasn’t for you either. You were so close to your due date. 2 weeks and baby would be here so it was pretty time hungry but if it would make matters better, you were happy to do it.

“Please don’t apologize! Evan is already headed to pack!” You could hear the teasing in her voice and what sounded like a man on the other end, possibly Evan, and it brought a smile to your face. “If you could go ahead and text this number your address, we’ll be on the first flight from LA. Hopefully be there by tomorrow morning. Does that all sound okay?”

“Yes, that sounds really great. I’ll text you as soon as we hang up. Um, thank you — for doing this. I really appreciate it.”

“Please, I’m happy to. I want what’s best for you both. I’ll see you very soon!”

The conversation ended and you stood in place, holding your phone to your chest as you went over what just happened in your head again. This was really happening.

“Hello?!” Your eyes shot over to Shay who was staring at you wide eyed waiting for you to fill her in.

“They’re coming here,” you nodded, seeing Shays eyes light up, “they’ll be here tomorrow.”

“Holy shit. Holy shit!” Shay stood excitedly and practically skipped over to you grabbing your shoulders and turning you to face her completely. “They’re coming here. Evan is coming to you!” She let out a small shriek causing you to squint a little.

“I know” you nodded and attempted a smile which caused hers to falter. “I’m glad, really. But honestly, I’m terrified. What if everything goes wrong? It seems like that’s my life lately.” You chuckled harshly.

“Hey” Shay let her hands hold either side of your face in a caring manner and gave you a reassuring smile. “Everything will be fine. You got this, okay? Just… take it one step at a time. Don’t let anyone else be in control. You grew this baby, you are his mother, you are in control. You just have to remember that.” You had a tendency to be quite a pushover and Shyla knew that. You were a people pleaser and conflict quite literally made you want to vomit.

You gave her a smile and nodded, feeling her squish your cheeks and pull you into a hug, allowing her to comfort you and and hugging her back.

After a minute, Shay pulled back letting her hands remain on your shoulders again. “Okay. So you should make yourself look hot.” She nodded with a determined look but you quickly objected.

“No. No I want him to see me this way. Im almost 9 months, I’m two weeks from having this baby. He doesn’t need me to be hot, he needs to be okay with me being myself.” You slipped from her hold and walked out to the kitchen, grabbing a mug and filling it with your decaf coffee that’s cold now and topping it off with some cream. Shay followed and sighed knowing you were right.

“If you say so. But listen, I have to go to work. Please keep me updated? And I’ll see you tomorrow? Call me after you meet with them?” You nodded to each of her questions as she strode to the door slipping her shoes and jacket on then turning to you again for vocal confirmation.

“Yes yes and yes.” You smiled and she grinned and waved, leaving your apartment to you and your loud mind. Your eyes immediately shut and you let out a long sigh that you’ve been holding in. She was right, you were in control. But when money is involved, you felt like you were nothing. You sincerely hoped it wouldn’t turn into that, that he would come here and he would want to be here and do this with you rather than against you. You knew he was busy, you knew he worked a lot and had an important career. But your child isn’t a toy and you were damned if anyone wanted to turn him into one.

—

Evan’s POV

As soon as Sarah filled Evan in on what was agreed on, he did in fact go straight to his room, shoving clothes and all the necessities he needed in his bag. He wasn’t sure how long he was going to be there, whether it would be a day or a week or a month. He was determined to be there for you since he wasn’t able to be the last 8.5 months of your pregnancy. It was eating him alive, but he knew he had to give himself grace just as you did for not being able to reach him. This was nobodies fault. But now he has the chance to make things right, and he wanted to. He thought about what he could, should, do. Does he need to move to you? Does he move you to LA? How do you coparent correctly with the amount of distance between you and his job. He wasn’t necessarily a fan of picking up his life and completely changing it, but he was sure you wouldn’t want to change what you’ve built either.

He shook his head at all the thoughts and settled on it being something you two would talk about. Right now, all he wanted to focus on was going to you, seeing you again, and talking about the child the two of you made together.

His life wasn’t ready for a child ti be in it. He wasn’t necessarily excited that he’d have more responsibility, but he was going to take responsibility regardless. He was 35, you were… well. He didn’t know. You never told him. You were definitely in your twenties though. You could both do this, he was sure of it.

“Did you book a flight?” He asked as he walked out to Sarah who was sat perfectly at his island counter. She turned and smiled to him, showing him her phone screen that showed the two flight confirmation codes. He sighed and gave her an appreciative look. “Thanks. For all of this. I honestly don’t know what I would’ve done if you didn’t. I don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong here.” He shook his head and leaned his back against the fridge, closing his eyes as he let his mind wander again.

“There’s no right or wrong yet. You just have to go to her and talk. That’s your focus. The right and wrong will come into play then, so just be ready.” Sarah stood from her spot and sighed facing him. “I’m going to go so I can also pack, seeing as you’re already done.” She grinned, glancing down at his filled bag then back to him. “We leave tomorrow at 6:25. I’ll email you your confirmation code and all that good stuff. Be there early please, and I’ll see you then.” Sarah had made her way ti him and opened her arms wide, him accepting the hug graciously and giving her a small squeeze.

“Thankful for you.” He called out as she made her way to the door, smiling and raising her arm in acknowledgment and leaving his home.

It felt like tomorrow was an eternity away for him. He was so impatient, even with the amount of nerves he was feeling and all of the negative and scary thoughts that came to him. He just wanted to get this part over with, seeing you again, coming to terms with what was happening. He knew he would as soon as he was able to see your bump for himself.

It took everything for him not to make a new Instagram just so he could go to your page and look at all your pictures. He only was able to see a few and it wasn’t enough for him. He wanted more. He wanted to see your life through your pictures and words. But he removed himself from Instagram for a reason and he knew it was best to stay off of it until this blew over on social media. He didn’t want to make anything worse for you, imagining all of the comments you must be getting. Probably more negative than positive. He was so grateful for his fans, truly believing he wouldn’t be where he was if it wasn’t for them, but man they could be extreme sometimes. He knew it was out of love, but damn.

So the hours went by and Evan did everything he could to take his mind off of it but really to no avail. He barely slept through the night, tossing and turning, imagining different scenarios in his head, trying to think of the right words to say to you. Nothing seemed right. What was right for you wasn’t for him and what was right for him wasn’t for you. He overthought everything, wondering how he could’ve been so careless. He should’ve been more careful in Vegas, but it is what it is and the choices you make have consequences. He could ignore it, leave you to do it yourself which would honestly make his life easier rather than adding another thing to his plate. But that was wrong and he knew it.

The following morning finally came around and with maybe an hour or two of sleep, Evan drug himself from bed and to the shower, readying himself for the events that were to come. He was tired and sluggish but made it in time to meet Sarah, who looked as good as always, the early mornings never faltering her appearance or great attitude. She greeted him with a smile and they made their way to the front together to check themselves in for their flight, loading their luggage and making their way to the coffee kiosk that the airport had.

“Oh thank god. I need like… straight espresso, I need caffeine.” He groaned as they ordered, ordering himself a large double shot in the dark. They tipped the barista who was a nice young lady holding herself together as she served two of her favorite celebrities. This was LA, after all.

Once retrieving their drinks, they settled themselves in the waiting area. Evan dipped down nearly half of his drink before he set it down and rested his elbow on the chair next to him and resting his head in his hand and letting his eyes close. They had about 40 minutes till it was time to board the plane so he took advantage and took a nice Power Nap while Sarah worked on some business on her phone, already rested and not needing anymore.

—

Basic POV

Within the next 2 hours, Evan and Sarah boarded and were on their way to you; meanwhile you had just barely got yourself out of bed by 8. Sarah had been keeping you updated with where they were. You had about an hour and a half before they’d be there, enough time for you to shower and ready yourself. You rethought about Shay’s words and your reply. The more they played in your head, the more you wanted to follow her recommendation. No, you didn’t want to look hot necessarily, but definitely good. You were pretty swollen and uncomfortable, but considering you’ve been living in your extra large sweatpants and an oversized tshirt, you figured maybe it’d be nice to dress up for a change. Maybe it’d make you feel good. And not that it mattered, but you did want to make a good impression.

You showered and dried off, blow dried your hair so that your layers laid nicely, then pulled your makeup out contemplating on a look and settling on a nice “natural” look that would hopefully make you glow instead of making you look so pale and sick. Once happy with your look, you made your way to your closet and picked through multiple outfits, groaning in annoyance when nothing was right considering they were your regular clothes and you were much larger at this point, ya know, almost 9 months pregnant. You finally tried on one of your fleece dresses and to your surprise, it fit perfectly over your bump, even making it stand out more which you appreciated. You slipped on some flat white tennis shoes and slipped your purse over your shoulder. Looking at the time, you had 20 minutes to spare giving you just enough time to meet at the coffee shop you suggested to meet at. Your apartment wasn’t messy but you just felt better not bringing anyone to your personal space yet.

You glanced at yourself once more and sighed in relief that you looked nice and it did in fact make you feel good. You grabbed your phone and car keys and exited your apartment and made your way down the sidewalk to your assigned parking spot, getting in your vehicle and starting it. It was chilly here, so you gave it a moment to warm up before backing out and driving straight to the coffee joint, Steady Grinding, parking and making your way inside. You ordered yourself a decaf latte and found a spot at one of the cute little tables that had 3 other chairs around it. You managed to pick a spot that was more secluded from the front and the rest of the tables, right by a window allowing you to watch the world go by while you waited for the father of your child to show up.

Your heart was beating what felt 100 beats a minute and it was so tight from the build up if nerves to just get here. Anytime you thought about what was going on, it would make your stomach flutter and your head spin. You wanted to cry from the many emotions you were feeling to finally be where you’ve wanted to be since you found out. It was so much to be holding onto, and your precious baby boy could tell. Your mind came back when you felt the kicks he gave you, looking down and watching the movements he was able to make so perfectly. You smiled and rested your hand over your bump and felt him push on it a few times before settling down.

“Mommy’s here baby, sorry for all of the mixed emotions you must be feeling from me.” You whispered down to him. You often talked to him, reading somewhere online that they can hear you and can ultimately build a stronger bond. You wanted to build the strongest bond you possibly could. Your baby was the most love you’ve ever felt, even though it was the hardest feeling to come to terms with in the beginning. You’ve never loved anything more.

You were too busy rubbing your belly in hopes your little one could feel it and an attempt to soothe him and yourself, that you didn’t hear the ding of the bell when someone entered.

When Sarah and Evan entered, Evan’s eyes immediately scanned the room going over every face trying to find you. He’d be lying if he said he wouldn’t be able to find you in a large crowd, your face was imprinted in the back of his mind since the day you two shared intimately. You were a different kind of beauty, you were art. And when his eyes finally landed on you, his heart nearly exploded. There you were, holding and rubbing your very obvious bump, inside the making of you both. Evan couldn’t explain the feeling he had when he saw you. It was exactly what he needed to confirm that this was real. You were real, and his child was real.

And as if perfectly on cue, feeling someone’s eyes on you, you swiftly looked up from your tummy and instantly met Evan’s eyes that were taking you in. You were winded the moment you saw him and your mind blanked.

This was really happening. This is real.

He was here.

@demxnicprxncess

@quicksilversg1rl

@evanpetersfav

@kylespencersvocalcords

@evanpetersmood

@totta69

@ava1262

@1109oo

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thatswhatthepoetssay · 10 months

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One Way Ticket

Tate Langdon x Reader | Angst |

Summary: Seven months worth of empty promises. Seven months of waiting for things to change yet somehow they always stay the same. Trying to change the outcome of an already released film, is just as pointless as trying to leave the Murder House.

Word Count: 865

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Ten months ago, YN moved in into the famous house of horrors in Los Angeles, California.

Nine months ago, a strange yet compelling boy next door introduced himself to her as Tate Langdon, one of her neighbors from down the street.

Eight months ago, the pair shared their very first kiss.

Seven months ago, Tate had asked YN to be his girlfriend, to which she of course agreed.

At first everything was absolutely perfect, Tate would come over every day and since YN has been busy with finishing her last year of high school online, it was the ideal plan. She wouldn’t have to leave her house and could focus on her studies, and Tate could enjoy his “nature walks”, as he called them.

The two teens enjoyed spending time together and could confide in one another about different troubles.

However as summer approached, the honeymoon phase of their relationship seemed to end. They started getting into more and more fights, which would almost always end up in Tate begging for forgiveness.

At first the fights were about small things that piled up, but as time passed their problems only grew.

After finishing school, YN wanted to get out of the house more, maybe even book a trip for the summer. Tate however wanted nothing to do with those plans. He was set on sticking to their regular routine and would always insist on putting off her plans for different times.

One day after suggesting yet another fun summer activity and getting turned down yet again, the poor girl has had enough.

“Alright you know what.” Tate gave her a look but continued looking through her cd collection.

“Why do you always insist on always staying at my house? I there like a warrant for your arrest that I don’t know about?” She scoffed.

Tate simply mumbled something about privacy turned to look out the window. He knew he couldn’t tell her, she would think he was absolutely crazy and would kick him out. He was genuinely surprised that none of the other spirits showed themselves to her yet.

After deciding that silence wasn’t a good enough response, YN let out a sigh and moved towards the door.

“You need to go. Now.” At that Tate turned back to her, his eyes widened at her words. For six months of their relationship they hadn’t fought once. However after summer started they seemed to fight quite often.

“Wha-what? Please YN don’t.” He pleaded.

“No Tate, I’ve had enough. You’re always so secretive, you never wanna do anything outside my house. Speaking of, i’ve never even been to yours!” She exclaimed as her cheeks began to heat up from anger.

“I’ve tried to be understanding, I really did. But I can’t keep doing this anymore. Leave and don’t come back Tate.”

He couldn’t help but just stand there dumbfounded, not knowing what to do. Tate knew he couldn’t just walk out because she would watch him leave. She would see how as soon as his foot steps over the property line he disappears.

“Fine since you wanna be difficult, i’ll leave. But you better be gone by the time I come back.” She stated as her pointed finger poked his chest.

Quickly YN grabbed her purse and phone making her way into the hallway. She carefully went down the stairs and reached for the door handle.

As the front door opened she felt a punch to the gut and let out a yelp as she fell to the floor. At first she thought she was getting robbed, but the attacker seemed to only be interested in her.

She received a few more punches to her abdomen, then a women’s face came into view. She had a blonde updo and strangely familiar facial features.

“Stay still dear, shouldn’t be long now.” The woman whispered as she gently whipped the tears off of YN’s face.

Before YN could comprehend what had happened the woman left. That’s when the girl moved her hands towards her stomach. As her fingers touched the fabric of her shirt, she realized it was soaked with unknown liquid.

At first she thought that maybe she had spilled something. However, as YN raised her hand to inspect the unfamiliar liquid, she quickly realized it was none other than blood.

Panic started to overtake YN as she figured out she was stabbed by the blonde. Her eyes darted across the foyer in an attempt to find her phone and call for help.

As she lay on the floor, unable to get up or even move, a few stray tears escaped her eyes.

She had only recently graduated, her life was only beginning. She should have gotten to live it to the fullest and enjoy all the joys of it. Instead she was robbed of that. YN would never graduate college, travel the world, or marry the love of her life.

While her mind was racing with thousands of thoughts, her eyelids slowly became heavier. Her breath became labored and her whole body continued to shiver.

After a few more minutes of agony, YN became yet another victim of the Murder House.

Another soul added to the collection.

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Ps: Hi guys! I know i’ve kinda disappeared for a while but im back. I would really like to start writing more so here I am. Requests are open so please feel free to send them! <3

Kisses and hugs, Anna

#american horror story #tate langdon #tate x reader #tate langdon x reader #ahs murder house #evan peters ahs #ahstories #tate langdon angst #ahs angst #evan peters angst #ahs 1984 #ahs asylum #ahs coven #evan peters #jimmy darling #kyle spencer #fanfic #violet harmon #constance langdon

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evanspresso · 1 year

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arguments after dinner

The ocean front restaurant roared with countless tables of friends and families, waiters and waitresses zooming past tables with large amounts of food and drinks as the night buzzed.

Laughter and raised voices erupted through the air as y/n watched her boyfriend top off their friends’ wine glasses, forgetting count, y/n took a sip of the red wine that stained her lips.

The tartness of it washing down her throat caused her cheeks to flush while Wren leaned in towards her and clink yet another glass against hers.

“This is the best wine I’ve ever had!” She squealed.

Y/n shook her head, pointing towards the rest of the wine bottles that littered the white table cloth, “You said the one before that was the best you’ve ever had!” y/n laughed causing Wren to shrug and take another sip.

“It’s my birthday, you can’t ask me that!” Wren hiccuped, causing the table to erupt in chuckles and nodding heads.

Y/n watched as Tommy took the last bite of his pasta and motion at your friends that it was time to head back to the hotel and take the drunk stragglers back to their hotel rooms.

Y/n looked around, noticing Joseph and Natalia slump together, giggling at their forks and she couldn’t help but burst out in laughter. It was definitely time to go back to the hotel.

It’s all fun and games until people wake up hungover and not able to get out of bed, especially on vacation. None of them wanted anyone to miss tomorrows early morning water sport activities.

Evan sighed loudly, wrapping his arms around Steve's shoulders, calling out to everyone that it was indeed time to head back to the hotel so the group could get enough time to recuperate before tomorrow.

“Y/n aren’t you glad that you landed such a teddy bear?” Steve said, shoving Evan playfully.

“I know, I got pretty lucky for my first one, huh?” she wiggled her eyebrows over at the group of boys, they all laughed as she winked at her boyfriend who suddenly froze.

Evan unraveled his arms that sprawled across his friends chest and stood up, his expression showing total shock but y/n didn’t notice. Y/n stood up, grabbing her clutch before pushing her chair back towards the table.

Her friends sporadically following her lead as she said wrapped her arms around Evan’s arm while they said their goodbye’s and goodnight’s.

The walk from the restaurant to the hotel wasn’t a long one, but y/n realized quickly that it would be a very quiet one.

Suddenly, Evan unwrapped his arm around her as they walked silently, their shoes scuffling against the pebbled walkway. Y/n giggled playfully poking at his side making him scowl at her with furrowed brows, y/n’s eyes narrowed taken aback by her boyfriends action towards her playfulness.

Maybe he wasn’t in in the mood? y/n hummed to push away her hurt feelings and snuggled her head against his chest causing him to stiffen under her touch- her heart dropped at yet another standoffish reaction.

“What’s wrong?” She questioned lightly.

Evan scoffed out a ‘it's whatever’ making her eyebrows furrow as she leaned her head back to glare at him, watching him roll his eyes into the night. “Okay, what the fuck?”

If y/n wasn’t pissed then, y/n was definitely pissed now. She crossed her arms as Evan flew his hands up in the air and pointed at her like she knew exactly what he was apparently annoyed about.

“Are you seriously asking me that?” he chuckled darkly. “Like, really?”

“Obviously! God forbid I can’t read your mind!” she watched him storm way from her, y/n’s shorter legs hurried after him with clenched fists. “Evan!”

He couldn’t help but let out an annoyed laugh, shaking his head before rubbing his palm against his cheeks. Sure, he was annoyed at her, but the added alcohol in his system didn’t help his emotions and he couldn’t think twice about how he reacted.

“What?!” He felt her hand clutch onto his shirt and he groaned, his legs slowing down because he knew he regularly walked too fast for her.

“Think! Think about why I might be annoyed y/n, seriously?” he shouted with his arms flying up from his sides.

He watched y/n put her hands on her hips in frustration as she looked at him with confusion.

“You do this every single time, why can’t you just be an adult and tell me what you’re so pissed off about?!”

“No I don’t! Why am I always the bad guy and.. what? I can’t be mad at you?” He yelled, his legs bringing him closer to y/n as she shooed him off with her hand, she rolled her eyes and huffed out as she looked towards the beach in the distance, wishing to be anywhere but here, fighting with her boyfriend on vacation.

“You’re aloud to be mad at me! But its not fair when you won’t tell me why! I mean what could have possibly happened in that restaurant to make you so-” y/n stopped mid sentence as she snapped her head towards him, his eyes wide as he caught on to why she paused.

He nodded, "yeah, yeah” he scoffed as he took off his hat and ran his hand over his hair. “Now you know.”

Y/n covered her mouth with her hand and closed her eyes tight, she never meant to not tell him, but she kept putting it off because she didn’t want to scare him off early on in their relationship. He never asked.

Eight months passed by and she never told him, now she wanted to find the right time and every time she thought that it would be the time, it would slip her mind.

She cursed loudly causing Evan to bite the inside of his cheek, watching her shoulders fall. “I’m sorry… I never meant to not tell you-”

“Then why didn’t you?”

“You’re older than me and I thought it would have been awkward, or you wouldn’t be as interested in me if I told you. We were new and you were so.. so you, and I was nervous and I didn’t want you to think differently about me. Obviously, I- I don’t know what I was thinking 'cause I know you’d never think that way or make me feel any type of way.” y/n gushed.

Her eyes swelling with tears as she finally explained to her boyfriend that he was her first beau. “I’m sorry. I seriously didn’t mean to keep it from you I- I promise I’d never keep anything from you intentionally… especially something important for our relationship.”

Evan sucked in his breath as the salty air blew around the couple, his eyes glossing over as he watched y/n quietly break down right before him.

Evan quickly stepped towards her, his arms hugging her body close into his, her body shaking against his as she cried silently. “You don’t have to be sorry I- I shouldn’t have been so angry.” he cooed. “I just wish you told me.”

“I know” y/n croaked out as she sniffled, her big eyes scanning up to his face.

"I'm ten years- almost eleven years older than you. This shit is important to talk abut before getting into a relationship. You should have told me. Imagine if it was the other way around." Evan said seriously.

"Would it have changed your mind?" she asked.

Evan stayed silent, his eyes moved from her face, looking down at his shoes as he kicked a pebble to the side before he sighed, his hands gripping her puffy cheeks to wipe her tears away. “I feel so stupid.” she whispered. "And selfish... truly my age huh."

'Shhh" he hushed, “you’re not stupid y/n.” he chuckled lightly causing her to blush beneath his soft hands.

She smiled lightly, rolling onto her tip toes as she felt him lean down and sprawl his lips against hers. They simultaneously moaned into the kiss as Evan deepened the kiss, licking her bottom lip to ask for entrance.

Y/n happily obliged and smiled causing their teeth to clash- his tongue finding hers, feeling like the first time they’d ever greeted one another.

Evan’s hands slid down her shoulders to grip her sides and squeeze her curves causing y/n’s head to fall sideways while he sponged his lips against her now burning skin.

The taste of lingering wine made them both hum lowly before he brought his hand behind her back and yank her against his chest, laughter pooling around them as he rested his forehead against her forehead.

“I think this calls for a truce?”

Evan bit back a laugh and nodded, interwinding their fingers before pulling her towards the pathway back to the hotel.

“You know, I’m nervous that I’m your first boyfriend.” he said bringing y/n to snort out- squeezing his hand as they began walking, “Let’s make me your only.”

#evan peters fluff #Evan Peters angst #Evan Peters x you #Evan Peters x reader #Evan Peters x y/n #Evan Peters blurb #Evan Peters masterlist #Evan Peters moodboard #Evan Peters ahs #ahs evan peters #jimmy darling #kai anderson #mr march #mr gallant #tate langdon #kit walker #kyle spencer #austin sommers #james patrick march

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drowningyoursorrow · 8 months

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'ALL MY DREAMS AND ALL THE LIGHTS MEAN NOTHING WITHOUT YOU

kit walker x gn! reader (requested)

You and Kit first met when you both were sent to the asylum for crimes neither of you committed. You two grew incredibly close but never tried for anything more, although you badly wanted to. When the both of you were released, you went separate ways, you found the limelight and became a surviving star. Books and talk shows about your experience whilst Kit went off the radar, you try to gain his attention with your stardom. But will you succeed?

!!!: violence, swearing, kissing, angst W/C: 4.2k

YOU still clearly remember the day that you were dragged out of your very own home and misplaced into the asylum. An unfortunate day it was, you were grieving the loss of your best friend. It was raining that evening, everything was aching, and you felt as if you couldn't carry on. How could you? Your dear friend was everything that you had, without them, you felt as if you had nothing.

Before you could mourn any longer, there was a loud bang and distant shouting, outside your home. Fear struck you, then there it was. "Open the door _, you are under arrest for the murder of _!" Before you could even collect what was going on, your front door slammed forward and fell just before you. There you came face to face with a group of police officers, with a few holding guns and riot shields.

Your ears were ringing and everything felt hazy during that moment, then quickly you were shoved into your floor. Your head hit the ground hard, which only made you feel more nauseous as people surrounded you. Soon you felt yourself being roughly handcuffed, then being pushed through the crowds of officers and people as camera flashes blinded you. What was going on? Then you felt yourself fall into the backseat of a van, you couldn't hear anything, you could hardly even see.

Eventually, everything drowned out as you felt yourself pass out and succumb to your concussion. Soon after, it felt like you weren't awake, and you weren't sleeping either, you felt the vehicle shake as it moved. Everything felt so painful and sore, you could mildly make sense of your current condition. Laid flat at the bottom of the vehicle in between rows of seats on the side on the inside. Everything appeared metallic, your senses slowly coming back to you as you felt the cold of the steel.

Weakly you pushed yourself onto your knees, holding on the edge of a seat, attempting to lift yourself up. You managed to sit yourself onto the side and study the rest of your surroundings and your state. It appeared to be the back of a van, but everything else seemed to be barricaded, only a small window in the back doors. You peered through them, clumsily, and only saw rows of trees surrounding the road behind you. The sky was dark and appeared slightly stormy, worse than before.

You wanted to scream and kick around, beg them to let you go. But your heart wasn't in it, you recall them mentioning murder--you murdering somebody. The name being a blur but of whom was what you couldn't remember, your head was throbbing. You tried to touch where it hurt and finally picked up on the chains that were wrapped around your shape. How did you just now notice this?

That was probably why you struggled so much just to sit yourself up. Nevertheless, you lifted your cuffed hands and felt the top of your forehead, wincing at the slight pressure. You brought them back and noticed blood now covering your fingers, drawing in a breath to calm yourself. You relaxed but still couldn't ignore the pain that took place in every part of your body, you just wanted to know where they were taking you.

Not only that, but you'd assume you were about to be locked up for a murder, that you hadn't done. Maybe it was still the grief that filled you or wanting to just lay down and never wake up. But you honestly had hoped where you were going had something for you to lay, even though that should be the least of your worries. You closed your eyes and leaned against the wall behind you, hoping this was a dream of some sort. But you knew that the pain you're feeling was real and genuine, what a terrible day it was.

There was a loud bang of the doors being slammed open and darkness surround you as you struggled to recollect yourself. You felt your sides being pulled, and messily climbed out from the vehicle, still unable to really see. You could only piece out, what looked to be, a hospital? Before you just closed your eyes trying to gain back your consciousness, soon feeling yourself being pushed upstairs. Then cool hair hit you and just for a second, you basked in it.

Only being able to see fluorescent lights above you and faint talking beside you, and now you were just clumsily standing. Before you could feel yourself collapse, you were being dragged somewhere again. Then once again, you were shoved into a room, the sound of a door shutting behind you. You were still in chains, but you hoped that they'd remove it later, since it was dark when you made it out of the van. You fell into what you assumed was a bed, ignoring the discomfort you felt.

The walls were messy and old, everything was secluded, and you could faintly make out a bucket. You just laid yourself back down, making due with a position with the chains. And you closed your eyes, letting the exhaustion finally hit you, the pain subsiding only for a moment. For some reason, you didn't feel angry or anything, only tired, like you've given up already. You thought for a moment, you hope tomorrow is better.

You were awoken by clanging from outside your door, sitting yourself up against the wall behind you. The door creaked open as a nun made her way to you, looking down at you, judging you. You only looked up at her, unsure of what to make of the situation, mainly focused on why a nun is in a prison? "Get up." It was all she said, and you complied immediately, she seemed to appreciate that as she just gave you a smirk.

She pulled out multiple keys and undid the chains on you, surveying you as you rubbed relief into your arms and legs. A grateful look took place over your features as you gave her a hesitant smile, "thank you, thank you very much." That was all you could make out, your throat felt dry and sore, you could almost hear it when you spoke. "Follow me, I need to take you to the common room where you can stay in your free time." You only nodded and followed behind her, stumbling a bit with your steps as she led you through the long hallways.

You observed the walls and rooms you two came across for a moment, and then it clicked in your head. You weren't at a prison, you were at an asylum. But why? Before you could question any further, you two stood before a room that held groups of people. You turned to look at her, clearly confused and lost, but she only held up a finger.

"Just go on, I'll give you a proper tour of this place later, I have business to attend to." And with that she was gone, you were a bit far away from the room, so nobody really noticed you. You just swallowed away your questions and stepped into the room, it was loud and a bit messy. You could feel that you stood out from the rest of these people, but you continued your way around the room. A record player was beside you, you made sure to situate yourself away from everybody.

You were sure that the confusion was evident on your features because there were two, seemingly normal people approaching you. Unsure of how to really converse with the situation you're in and your current condition, you just pretended as if they weren't there. But they tapped you and stared at you, confusion on them as well, they were studying you. There was a male and a female, looking similar in a way, they both had brown hair and were pale as can be. They looked more rugged than you did, beside the blood stains and bruises that probably showed on your features.

"What happened with ya'?" The guy spoke up, and the woman just glared at him, in turn he just gave her an apologetic look. You didn't know what to say, and your throat was still in pain, but you tried your best to sound normal. "I got knocked out and brought here, I thought they would've put me in the cooler or something. Is this like a place for crazy folks?" You let the question slip out, but they seemed amused at your response but remained hesitant. "Ya, sort of, what did ya' get in here for?"

The guy seemed to have a lot of questions, but his expression seemed genuine, so you continued. You thought for a moment, "well, my best friend died recently, so I was processing that, and the fuzz just came in and said I murdered someone, I can't remember who they said, but I didn't. I couldn't even say anything really, I was just put here." The two of them took in your words and relaxed a bit before nodding their heads, "Ya, that's how it wus' for me too. Lana here was put in here for somethin' differen' though." The two of them continued asking more questions about you and the events that lead to you coming there.

Throughout the upcoming weeks, you got to know the both of them more and discover how long they've been at the asylum. Kit Walker was the name of the guy, he was a sweet fella and often got hurt the most. Lana Winters was the name of the woman, and she was more on the quiet and mature side. It took her longer to really warm up to you, but she looked after you as much as Kit did. They told you their whole plan to escape and get out of the place, they were setting everything up and wanted you to be a part of it.

You gladly agreed, when you guys weren't setting up your plans and brainstorming over almost everything. You'd occasionally hang out, Lana mostly did her own thing and you didn't bother her. Not only that, but you admired her in every way if you were being honest, you had placed all of your trust with the both of them. They've clearly been through more together, and you didn't mind, you enjoyed what you could get. You often spent more time with Kit since he seemed to enjoy quality time.

As the months passed, Kit began to tell you about himself and what he's gone through when he first came to the asylum. About his wife and, Grace, he never went into specific details on what had happened, afraid you wouldn't believe him. But when he did admit to what really happened, he expected you to just stare at him and believe he was joking. He was surprised and conflicted when you only turned sympathetic, your eyes didn't doubt anything he said. And that's when he felt it, he felt his stomach flutter, and he could only give you a breathless smile.

You two would hold each other when you cried and find comfort in one another whenever the two of you were alone. Sneaking out of your rooms a lot just to enjoy random spots Kit discovered in the asylum, and you loved every second of it. Occasionally Lana would tag along and those two would bicker like siblings, they finally made you feel whole again. You didn't really feel the need to communicate with them when you all hung out, you enjoyed just being alongside them. Lana would listen to your sorrowful stories, and Kit would hold you dearly when you cried.

You did grow more and closer with the both of them, and you viewed them both as very close friends. Well, your only friends. But you saw the both of them very highly, Lana, eventually picked up on your sudden interest in Kit. She pestered you about it until you did tell her that you were quite fond of him, and she could only smile. She gave you advice or things she's heard him say about you, and you pretended it didn't affect you.

Kit couldn't contain his smile whenever you two would interact, most often looking forward to when you guys would chat. Whenever he would come back after a punishment, he would immediately seek you out, since you would soothe him. He pretended like your platonic hugs didn't matter, but he always found himself melting into your touch. Whenever you got in trouble, he would plead to get caned instead of you, it hurt him to see you get punished. And as for you, you even begged to take his caning instead of him, and you were bad as him.

Eventually you two would talk about life when the both of you got out of the asylum, what you'd do, who'd you become. He mainly talked about how he wanted to get married or to adopt kids, he was always fond of the domestic life. You didn't care what you did or who you'd be, you mentioned how you hoped all of you would still be close. It made him pause and think about it, he only stared ahead as he thought about his future with Lana and you. All he said after that was, "I hope for us to have a good future together."

You didn't push, he was out of it for the rest of the day, seeming lost in thought a lot as you and Lana talked. Hoping it wasn't something that you said, you just headed back to your room, shamefully. Lana only watched you leave as she glared at Kit, he wasn't even paying attention, just anxiously bouncing his leg. When he finally did look up, you were gone and Lana was complaining about his behavior. It registered in his brain that you must've been put off by his sudden change of behavior.

He only groaned into his hands as Lana pitied him and his obliviousness, so she headed off to give him some time to himself. But he finally figured out what he wanted. As he stared up at the ceiling of the common room, leaning back against a chair. It was registering in his mind on how you two would laugh and hold onto each other, enjoying the other's presence. He wanted his future to be with you.

Building up the courage, he told you, he told you how he wanted to get out of this place with you. He told you how he wanted to be together with you, to get married to you. He told you how he wanted to raise kids with you, if you wanted to. He told you how he finally found someone who genuinely made him happy, and it was you. He told you that he was in love with you.

It was when the both of you snuck out and hid in his room, you could only smile as tears escaped you. He was scared, why were you crying? But all you did was just smile and kiss him, you kissed him like your life depended on it. And he accepted every ounce of love that you were willing to give. You two laid in each other's arms that night, looking forward to a better life together.

Later, you slipped out of his arms to head back to your room, not wanting to get in trouble. You slept more peaceful than you ever had that night. When you awoke, you could only see Kit sitting alone in the common room, he was lost in thought. He saw you approaching, and a blissful grin broke across his features, he hugged you, but you were worried about her. Most often, she was there before the both of you, so where was she?

But before you could think any further, what he said made you frozen. "Lana--Lana got out!" You stilled and joy filled you, you recalled what the plan was, she escapes and proves you and Kit's innocence. You couldn't even form any words, so you and Kit just held each other, your future was coming. Furthermore, you could hardly even think for the remainder of the day, you knew Lana was always smart, your admiration was what fueled you. She was your inspiration and your support, you already couldn't wait to see her once more.

A couple of weeks passed, and eventually you were able to get out before Kit, you were framed for the murder of your best friend. The thought still angers you and makes you feel defeated, but they eventually discovered it was suicide. You don't like thinking or talking about it, guilt always swallowed you whole whenever you did. Lana revealed that the forensic department was just uncoordinated and didn't look more deep into the cause of death. And what led to it, automatically assuming it was you because of close relations.

You told Kit that you'd gladly wait for his release and that you'll be waiting for him, and you two would get married. And he kissed you one last time before the two of you departed, The tape was revealed, proving his innocence, but it still took some time to get him out of there. During that time you came face to face with reporters, obliviously you answered each one. People even offered you a lot of cash just to say one sentence to them with your experience in the asylum. Before you were sent away, you were having money problems and barely making it to the next month.

So, you accepted each offer that came. Every book deal, every guest appearances, and anything that was offered. Overtime, you became a surviving star, Lana seemed to take the same route as you and you two would soon discuss ideas with each other. When Kit was eventually released, all he saw everywhere was you. All of it confused him, he'd seen you and Lana everywhere and for some reason. He didn't feel ecstatic about it.

He could see the change in the both of you, but what he didn't like most of all was who you became. When you heard of his release, you immediately went to him and greeted him. You couldn't contain your excitement one bit, and so when paparazzi discovered who you've been head over heels for all this time. It was everywhere. Kit accepted all of your attention, but he wanted nothing to do with the press or any of it. You two did spend a lot of time with each other, and you were giving offers to Kit, which would help him get back on his feet.

He could only stare at you with a saddened expression, all he wanted you to know was why you were doing this? You two had each other, why would anyone else matter? Nevertheless, he never judged you, he just denied every time you wanted to do a collaboration with him. With your busy schedule, the two of you began to fall apart, with bickering that turned into full-fledged arguments between the two of you. At the time, you were upset, and you just couldn't get where he was getting at.

Overtime, the both of you just broke it off, and you knew you felt your heart shatter when you went out your guy's shared home. He regretfully watched you from behind. He watched on how you didn't turn around when you were grabbing your bags, how you didn't turn around when you walked out through the door. How you didn't turn around when you put your bags into the back of your car, on how you didn't look back when you got into the driver's side. How you didn't even slow down or stop when you drove out of his sight, to never come back.

You watched how he just stood there when you packed your bags, you watched how he got out of the way for you to walk through the door. How he didn't say anything when you were grabbing your keys and heading to your car. How he just stood there and watched you put your luggage into your vehicle. How he just stood there when you got into the driver's side and paused for a moment. How he just stood there and watched you leave, without even waving or saying goodbye.

Years passed, and you became more than you ever were, with your new books and talk shows. You had everything you could ever dream of stardom, money, and cars, you'll always remember who got you into vehicles. You heard of his new upcoming marriage, you didn't know until Lana came to you and told you. It was when the two of you were just visiting in your apartment, she knew that it was better to know now rather than later, and you only paused and stared ahead out the window. You were happy for him, he was getting all that he wanted in his life, he was achieving his dream.

Maybe you should've fought harder for what you really wanted and not what you thought was the best for you two. You could never forget the expression on his face when you both agreed to separate and go your own ways. Your vision became blurry as your face became wet, Lana didn't say anything, she just went to you. And held you, just like he used to. You only began to sob harder and bury yourself into her arms, wanting to disappear and forget about everything.

You eventually calmed down and just gave a content smile, you were happy for him. But you knew that deep down that you'll always love Kit Walker and his terrible jokes. Lana and you decided to attend the wedding yourselves, deciding not to tell him that either of you were going. You slowly let yourself recover and adjust to him being with someone else, it was for the best. He was going to get what he wanted from the start, and you were going to happily watch him do it.

When the lucky day came, you decided to dress modestly and try your best to blend in with the rest of the crowd. Kit quickly noticed Lana, but he didn't see you, you made sure to stay in the back of all the crowds. You walked away from the group and stayed in a more secluded area as you smoked, needing a break. You heard someone approach you from behind, and you realized it was him. Surprised, you choked on the smoke in your lungs and hurled forward, the pain catching you off guard.

Kit obviously tried to go help you, but you just shoved him off and turned away from his curious eyes. He shouldn't see you like this. "Holy, are ya' alright? That sounded like it hurt, real bad." There was a smile in his tone, you just nodded your head weakly, still facing away from him. You wore a hat earlier to help your disguise, and it was working, "yeah, yeah feelin' great."

Shifting your voice into more of a deeper tone, he didn't seem to pick up on it. He just chuckled behind you, and you contemplated what to say, you wanted to talk to him one last time. "So how's the wedding? Best day of your life?" "I spose' you could say that, it's a weird feeling." "How so?" "I don' know, guess this wasn't what I expected." "Well, what did you expect?"

The question made him pause as he looked at the view behind the both of you, the ceremony was still going on. He's not even sure what drew him to this place to speak with this stranger, so he pauses. "Thought it'd be different," was what he finished with before heading back to his now spouse. You didn't even realize that you began to cry, so you hurriedly wiped away the tears and took a second. You'll be okay.

There stood Kit as he waited for his partner, you didn't want to look at his expression, knowing it'll only make you hurt more. Why were you doing this to yourself? They eventually looked at each other and said their vows, that was when you finally decided to look up. He was so happy, and you could feel your throat becoming dry once more, this was for the best. Mindlessly, his eyes surveyed the crowd before he finally kissed his spouse.

There he saw you. You were crying, but a smile was placed on your features as you clapped. You weren't looking his way, no, you were staring at the ground below you. Afraid to look up, it was already too much for you. So you got up and headed to leave, Kit stopped the kiss and stared at your back. He was watching you leave again, and a familiar feeling bloomed in his chest.

He finally saw you again after all of these years, and it's the same way when he saw you last. He could only smile as he realized it was you he was speaking to earlier, you who he watched choke on a cigarette. Turning back to stare at his partner in the eyes, but in the back of his mind he thought of something differently. He recalled the question you asked from before, what was different? he expected he would be marrying you. Maybe in another lifetime, would you be the one he's saying his vows to, maybe you two would've ran away together.

Maybe you both wouldn't be cowards next time, you'll always love each other in the end anyways.

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- Inspired by Without You by Lana Del Rey - I have not written something with this many words in a while - Sort of proofread? - Alternate ending maybe

Hope you enjoyed and if you have any requests or questions please dm!

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