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#jedi gossip
bl00000g · 11 months
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You ever think about how the Jedi council probably has a private comlink channel to bitch about all the other masters?
The councilmembers’ participation in said channel:
Mace Windu: ✅ doesn’t participate in gossip about other masters but definitely complains about padawans
Adi Gallia: ✅ Gossips more about actions then the people themselves
Agen Kolar:❓sometimes, listens a lot but rarely joins in
Coleman Kcaj: ❓ does not participate except for major events
Coleman Trebor: ✅ Does not participate in gossip per se, but gives his opinion on the actions of others
Depa Billaba: ✅ Acts as a counterbalance, offering reasons for why certain actions may have been taken
Eeth Koth: ✅ yes but gossips about actions than people
Even Piell: ✅✅ Gossips about **everyone and everything**
Ki-Adi-Mundi ✅: yes but not about members of the order
Kit Fisto: ✅ yes but only about silly things
Plo Koon: ✅ yes but only about people who deserve it
Saesee Tiin: ✅ offers a more objective analysis to gossip
Shaak Ti: ✅ yes, but *SHE DEFENDS LITERALLY EVERYONE SHE TALKS ABOUT
Stass Allie: ✅ yes but only about political events
Qui-Gon: ❌ (declined to join the council because he can’t be bothered to keep up with the gossip/j)
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mercysong-tardis · 5 months
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Deleted TCW scene. You KNOW Satine would visit Corosaunt during the summer for the view.
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tennessoui · 1 year
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a “stay til the dawn” epilogue
a christmas present for @anakinsthot at the request of @sexysymphony
short and sorta sweet epilogue of sorts to my king obi-wan au, where anakin crashlands on stewjon, loses his memory, and falls in love with king kenobi who makes everything a lot more difficult than it has to be
(3k)(hinted nsfw, but not really anything explicit)
Tobias has never looked more happy to see him, and they routinely get together for drinks at the King’s Pub in the Garden district to root for the Coruscanti waggleball team, decked out in Coruscanti scarlet in a crowd of unfriendly Stewjoni green.
“Ah, Toby, you’re looking well today,” Anakin reaches forward and up—and up—and up—to clap the palace guard on the shoulder of his armor.
“And you’re a sight for sore eyes, milord,” Tobias replies, offering his hand to help Anakin out of the speeder. “If I may say.���
“Say away,” Anakin chirps, jumping down to the ground and peering up at the Gargantiolan. “It’s nice to be missed, even if—“ he checks the comm unit on his wrist “—I’ve been gone less than three days.”
“My joy will pale in the face of the king’s, I assure you,” Tobias says, reaching one long arm into the speeder and retrieving Anakin’s pack. “I will see this returned to your quarters, Prince Set.”
Anakin wrinkles his nose, his immediate reaction to any suggestion that he stand on ceremony.
He may have married a king, but that doesn’t mean he particularly respects all the traditions he’s now beholden to. 
As a Jedi Knight, he never would have been greeted upon his return to the Temple, nor would he be excused from the tedious task of disengaging and storing his own speeder. 
Even as a war general, there had been little ceremony he had observed. He and his men were equal in all but their titles, and he had striven to make sure every soul in his company knew that. 
But his new job, his new title can’t be bucked off nor ignored for the very simple reason that no one will let him.
The Stewjonians are an obliging yet obstinate sort. Much like their king, who they seem to adore above all else. 
As Anakin feels the same way about King Kenobi, they have a lot in common, despite the way every Stewjonian who sees him insists on treating him as if he’s made of fine, delicate, ornamental transparisteel. 
“Fine,” he says with the smallest of sighs. He learned as a general that all battles could be fought, but some were not worth the effort, so predictable was their end. “Would you happen to know where our King is, if he has missed me so?”
Tobias raises four of his six eyebrows. “Can’t you feel him in the Force?” 
“No,” Anakin barely resists the urge to pout, which would be very unbecoming of a Prince Consort. “He’s blocked the bond.”
Something Obi-Wan only does when he’s angry with him, Anakin doesn’t add. 
At least Obi-Wan knows better than to cut himself off from the Force all together. The one and only time Anakin had made him furious enough that he’d slipped on Force suppression cuffs and disappeared from Anakin’s mind, Anakin…hadn’t reacted well.
Now when he’s grumpy—indignant, Anakin, perhaps scorned. Kings do not feel grumpy—he blocks their bond as if he’s simply locking a door, instead of deliberately locking Anakin out of the warmth and comfort of Obi-Wan’s mind, his very soul. It’s almost worse like this, but at least he knows he’s alive, can feel a quiet humming at the end of their bond. 
“Perhaps the healers have used your absence to push the king into attempting a more traditional form of a healthy, Stewjonian Force bond.” 
“I was under the impression such things do not exist.”
“Aye, I’d say that may just be why he blocked it then,” Tobias points out, but at Anakin’s dark expression, he quickly raises all four of his hands in his defense. “I’m only jesting, milord. He’s holding court today, I believe, given your continued absence. If you’d like to wait in the glass gardens or in the painting gallery, I’ll let Aislaen know to tell the king you’ve arrived.”
“No need,” Anakin waves his hand, already turning towards the palace’s front doors. “I know where the throne room is. I’ll let him know myself.”
“I was afraid you’d say that,” Tobias says, but Anakin is taking the stairs two at a time, pushing himself faster than humanly possible with the Force in order to reach his husband quicker. 
Given his continued absence—the absolute nerve of Obi-Wan! He’s been gone for two and a half days! He hadn’t even left the damn planet! What Obi-Wan has to be grumpy about, Anakin doesn’t know.
The throne room is one of the first rooms in the palace when one enters through the grand entrance hall. Obi-Wan had insisted on it being so, something about openness and accessibility.
Anakin has never liked its location, maybe because he’s not one to read metaphors into architecture. What it feels like to him, having the throne room only a corridor away from the mouth of the palace, is a security risk.
But at least now it’s convenient. 
The guards at the door know better than to block his entrance these days, though he breezes past them almost before they can drop into the customary bow.
The throne room is almost full, people from the capitol city taking advantage of the king’s need for distraction to come and give him problems to solve while he waits for Anakin to return.
Or whatever he does when Anakin is away.
The room is small enough that Anakin can see Obi-Wan as soon as he steps in. The king looks resplendent seated on his throne, cape carefully folded around him, the blue and green color of his outfit standing out against the dark wood of the seat.
The Stewjon people are not those who value gold and jewels and overt symbols of power; this is something Anakin respects.
But Force, would his king look beautiful decked out in the regalia other planets pile on their monarch. 
Anakin strides forward to stand at the back of the line leading to the King’s dias. Stewjonian citizens line the halls, but the line itself is relatively short. Though it is fairly late in the day, so maybe Obi-Wan has been seated here for hours already. Anakin would know if his stubborn husband would just unblock his side of their bond and let him have access to his mind. 
He looks tired, Anakin decides as he shuffles forward and can see more of the details of his king’s face. There are shadows under his eyes, and though he is careful to give each person before him his full attention, Anakin can see him drooping with the effort of it. 
If he weren’t being so pissy, Anakin would use his princely privileges to march forward and drag his king up to their private quarters for a nice soak in their indecently sized bath. He’d even wash his hair for him and push him back onto their bed to ride him to completion. He wouldn’t have to do anything. Anakin would look after the both of them.
But Obi-Wan is angry with him about something, and he’s decided to block their bond, and Anakin can’t reward that sort of behavior, not when he feels as though he needs that bond to breathe. 
So instead of running his hands through his king’s auburn hair and stretching himself wide enough to take the sizable intrusion of Obi-Wan’s cock after three days of abstinence, Anakin is standing here. In line in front of his king. Ready to complain like everyone else.
Two people away from the front of the queue, Obi-Wan looks up from the woman in front of him—complaining about some sort of imagined cheese monopoly in the Lower Colsteph district that’s been affecting her sales—and locks eyes with Anakin. 
He tenses all over, shoulders straightening and eyes shuttering.
For a very scary second, Anakin is terrified that he’s actually done something quite terrible and he’s just forgotten. 
Can a person have selective amnesia twice in so little time? 
But no, he’s been gone for the past couple of days on an excursion Obi-Wan himself approved. 
It’s perhaps a measure of how much the people of Stewjon love their king that the person ahead of Anakin follows Obi-Wan’s line of sight, sees Anakin standing behind him, and immediately removes himself from the situation. 
Though to be fair Anakin doesn’t know what his face looks like right now, his own anger rising in his stomach at the sight of Obi-Wan’s aloof, diplomatic expression aimed in his direction.
The nerve.
“There was a line,” Obi-Wan points out blasely as Anakin moves to stand before him. 
“And now I’m in the front of it,” Anakin replies. “Won’t you hear my grievances, King Kenobi?” 
Obi-Wan’s eyes flash. “I’ve half the mind to dismiss the court. It’s been a long day already, sir.”
“Oh, yes. It must be very exhausting, sitting around in comfortable furniture for hours at a time. But I’ve flown all the way from Olijon to see you, sire.”
“How flattering,” Obi-Wan replies. “But careful, sir, I’m a married man.”
Anakin bears his teeth. “As am I. As it were, my husband is who I have come to complain about.”
The crowd of Stewjonians shift around Anakin, giving him a fair amount of space.
They’re very smart people, the Stewjonians are.
“Oh?” Their king asks.
“I seem to have married the most stubborn, most uncommunicative Stewjonian the Force has ever created. He would grind his teeth down to the quick before he let slip his own emotions unprompted.” 
“Hm,” Obi-Wan says. 
“For example, I believe he is grumpy with me at the moment, though I’ve had to piece together his anger as one may piece together fragments of a broken mirror: the image is imperfect, unclear, incomplete.”
“Hm,” Obi-Wan says. “Perhaps if you looked into a mirror, you would find the source of your husband’s ire.”
“Oh, don’t you dare claim my metaphor for your benefit—“
“Apologies, darling. I am a king. It is what we do.” Obi-Wan leans forward on his throne and looks down at Anakin, resting his hand on his chin.  “Let me ask you something.”
Anakin narrows his eyes and crosses his arms.
“How long have you been married to this terrible husband of yours?”
“I didn’t say terrible—“ Anakin starts to protest before the words freeze in his mouth. “Two years,” he says instead, a sinking feeling in his stomach.
“Exactly?” Obi-Wan asks, arching an eyebrow.
Anakin swallows. “To the day,” he admits. “Ah, fuck. But Obi-Wan, I—“
Obi-Wan stands with a swirl of his cape. “Then I suggest you rush back to Olijon post-haste. After all, I’m sure you want to spend your anniversary outside of court, with your love. I, for one, would have.”
Final judgment passed, he turns on his heel to exit through the side door.
Anakin, of course, will not allow this to happen. He uses the Force to hold the door shut as Obi-Wan presses his palm against it.
When Obi-Wan turns to look at him, nostrils flaring and real fury flashing in his eyes, Anakin inclines his head. “Court dismissed,” he prompts.
Obi-Wan clenches and unclenches his jaw before he waves his hand. “Court dismissed.”
There are murmurs of both protest and relief as the people around them start exiting through the main entrance, one Anakin throws open with another flick of his hand.
“And guards dismissed as well,” Obi-Wan snaps at the same time Anakin opens his mouth to remind him. He sends a wave of appreciation towards his husband in the Force, but the king is more blocked off than ever. 
When the throne room is empty save for them, Obi-Wan stalks back to sit on his throne as if this whole thing has been his idea. He crosses his left leg over his knee and rests his hands on the armrests of his throne. “Well?” 
“You let me forget our anniversary,” Anakin says, which doesn’t feel like the best foot forward at the very beginning. But it’s true. “You should have told me not to go on the trip to Olijon. It could have waited.”
“I’m not in the business of telling my husband what to do or not do,” Obi-Wan replies, as if he doesn’t take great joy from ordering Anakin around in bed.
Anakin’s raised eyebrow must convey this skepticism, because Obi-Wan huffs. “That’s different,” he says, crossing his arms. “That’s…pleasure. This is…”
When he doesn’t continue, Anakin takes that as an invitation to stride up the dias into his husband’s personal space. When that doesn’t feel close enough, he doesn’t hesitate to clamber into his lap, forcing Obi-Wan’s body to accommodate him.
“What is this, my liege?” Anakin asks, wrapping his arms around his neck.
Obi-Wan looks torn, shields weakening. They’ve never been in an argument yet that hasn’t petered out when Anakin shortens the distance between them.
“This is duty,” Obi-Wan says resolutely, even as his shields waver. “You needed to go to Olijon because as the prince and an accomplished engineer, Prince Set was expected to inspect the latest transport rig there. That was your duty. And mine was to let you go.”
“But you’re grumpy with me,” Anakin points out, shifting closer and bringing up one of his hands to start playing with the ends of Obi-Wan’s bangs, which just stick out under the weight of his crown.
Maybe this is what causes Obi-Wan to melt into him. Maybe it’s his pout as he does it. Maybe it’s just that he’s missed him as much as Anakin has missed being here with him. 
“I’m not,” Obi-Wan mutters, dragging a hand over his face before he settles it against the small of Anakin’s back. “Not least because kings do not get grumpy.”
Anakin snorts but doesn’t say anything. He does rock forward pointedly though. After all, if they can get through this conversation, nothing is stopping them from…celebrating their anniversary right here in the throne room.
“I have a duty to my people as their king, and in marrying me you have taken on a part of that duty. I cannot keep you away when you are called upon, no matter the day. I…” Obi-Wan‘s eyes catch with his and he curls his hand around the apple of Anakin’s cheek. “It’s silly to be upset that you have taken so well to the duties I have burdened you with.”
Anakin blinks at him, slowly processing his words.
“I may have a reputation for being a bit forgetful,” he tells his stupid husband, nuzzling forward until their foreheads touch and he can stretch to place a kiss on the thin bow of Obi-Wan’s upper lip, “but I do believe I married a man. Not a planet. If my memory serves me correctly, in fact, we weren’t even on Stewjon when we were married. And I believe I have never taken on Stewjonian royalty vows as prince consort—“
“That’s because you keep hiding in the woods whenever we try to schedule a cerem—“
“Which means, my very stupid and melodramatic husband,” Anakin braces his both his hands on his shoulders and leans back so that he can look him in the eyes. “That my duty first and foremost is to you, and it always will be.”
Obi-Wan huffs and shakes his head slightly, automatically. 
“Baby,” Anakin shakes his head back. “I left my family, my friends, my entire way of life thousands of parsecs away just so I could be with you. Duty means nothing in the face of love. Not to me; not when it comes to this love.” 
His husband exhales rather shakily and twines his hand through Anakin’s hair, hauling him forward and connecting their mouths.
Anakin has been waiting for this since his ship landed back in the boundaries of Stewjon proper. He angles his head and opens his mouth at the lightest touch of Obi-Wan’s tongue to his lip, granting him access he never truly has to ask for.
It’s his already to do with as he pleases. Anakin is his to do with as he pleases, and he tries to make sure Obi-Wan understands that as he deepens the kiss, lets his hands fist in the front of Obi-Wan’s shirt as he rocks down in his lap.
Obi-Wan groans when Anakin sucks on his tongue, tightening his hold on his hair and forcing him into a better position. Kissing his husband is always an amazing experience, but after being deprived of his kisses for a few days, it feels like there’s nothing better in the world than the slide of their tongues, the sound of their breaths, the taste of Obi-Wan bursting on his tongue.
Anakin wants more. When it comes to Obi-Wan, he always wants more.
It takes the slightest nudge against Obi-Wan’s mind for his shields to waver and fall to Anakin, and he wastes no time at all reclaiming his space and refreshing their bond. 
The Stewjonian healers had warned them both about bond sickness and unhealthy attachments, the Stewjonian impulse to possess and cling. But Anakin and Obi-Wan’s bond is strong and healthy,  a meadow filled with soft, dappled light. Nothing at all like the thorny, overgrown path that the healers had painted in Anakin’s mind.
And if they were ever to convince Obi-Wan to sever their bond under the guise of his duty demanding it, Anakin would kill them. Simple as.
Greedily, he wraps himself in the tendrils of their open bond, separating their mouths to pant against the side of Obi-Wan’s neck.
After a second to catch his breath, he starts licking and sucking at the skin beneath his lips.
Two years. It’s been exactly two years since they were married beneath the Fei’luka sun. 
“You’re the most difficult man in the entire galaxy,” Anakin murmurs, sitting back to look at his husband. 
Obi-Wan’s eyes are dark, pupils blown.  Anakin can feel the swell of his cock beneath his ass. It would be incredibly easy to sink to his knees right here, lift up the cloth of Obi-Wan’s kilt, and take that cock into his mouth. He knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that Obi-Wan would let him. That Obi-Wan would enjoy it. 
He’s enjoyed it before, spreading his legs to allow Anakin’s shoulders to fit between them while he lounges on his throne.
Stewjonians despise opulence yet love ceremony, and their king is the same. His throne is simple treated wood, masterfully carved yet lacking the adornments others affix onto their physical seats of power. Yet Anakin has always thought that Obi-Wan gets a special sort of enjoyment from Anakin kneeling before him on his throne, though he’s never gotten him to admit it.
Anakin certainly enjoys it, the weight of his cock in his mouth and the inescapable press of Obi-Wan’s hand against the back of his head, his liege and his king and the best damn choice Anakin has ever made exacting pleasure upon him as he takes his own as well.
“Darling,” Obi-Wan groans, “a little restraint would be much appreciated.”
“How can I practice restraint when all I can think about is the way you touch me? How good it feels. How very right. Two years of it, but Force, Obi-Wan. Force, how many more years do you think we’ll have?”
“It depends on how kind the Force is to its worshippers,” Obi-Wan’s eyes crinkle and he ghosts a kiss up his jaw. 
Anakin shivers. “I’m its child, baby. The Force fucking loves me.”
The space between their bodies evaporates as Obi-Wan crushes him to his chest, pulling him down so there’s no escaping the feeling of the hard line of his cock.
“Fifty years then,” Obi-Wan swears. “Perhaps a hundred.”
Anakin’s laugh is breathless as he rocks down, rubbing himself against his husband’s erection. “And how many years will it take for us to get to the point where I forget something and you just tell me?”
Obi-Wan stands, lifting Anakin up into his arms. If it didn’t make Anakin lose his voice, that display of strength and possessiveness, he’d say something clever about improper use of the Force.
As it is, he can only moan high and loud as Obi-Wan carries him towards the door to the side chamber.
“Oh, fifty years perhaps. Maybe a hundred,” Obi-Wan tells him, and Anakin kisses him quiet, as is his princely duty.
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jebiknights · 27 days
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I know I've been complaining about this a lot recently and I'm sorry about that, but it's become really frustrating for this to happen when I'm... not even reading a fic about Anakin. Like sure whatever you don't like him but the kinds of things I see people have characters say... Congrats! You hate Anakin more than you like these side characters you seem to only have included to have them shit talk Anakin (and often woobify Obi-Wan). At this point you are being more insulting to those characters than to Anakin himself.
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maulfucker · 8 months
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Actually thinking about Latros interacting with Maul and Savage is really funny because he's a really talented idiot. Like he'd use Force lightning to light up a cigarette in front of Maul and Maul stops dead for a full minute from the flashbacks to his youth. Maul tries to Force choke him because he's so annoying and he's like haha I know how to do that too :] and chokes him back (lightly. He's just playing). They ask who taught him how to use the force and he's like "idk brothers I just know it. This is like. Natural. It's just instinct" and Savage absolutely loses it. He had to train so hard and feel so much pain and this little runt says it's just instinct??
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somestorythoughts · 8 months
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The combination of clones as the worse gossips AND clones as the best secret keepers headcanons.
Like, a trooper does something dumb? Slips on a banana peel and goes flying in a moment worthy of the looney tunes? Stutters in front of a hot person? Prime gossip material. It's all over the battalion in two days. A third of the army's heard in a month (it'd be more and faster but there's only so fast non-army communications are relayed between troopers that aren't working together). The only way that doesn't happen is when everyone who sees it agrees this is prime blackmail material. Same goes for any ridiculousness/coolness their jedi get up to.
But a trooper goes through shit and doesn't want anyone else to know? Is having a relationship and is afraid of backlash from the wider group? Has a phobia of any kind? A trooper says they don't want to share info and you will never hear about it. It'll never reach the ears of anyone who was not in that conversation. It was never said. This also goes for their jedi. Medics/health info is sometimes an exception because there's definitely been people who tried to hide injuries till someone went "nope" and dragged them to the medbay.
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gummy-sharkz · 8 months
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hot take! i think GAR would have known about the mistreatment of the Corries. even if they trusted the Jedi, there are a lot of things that they knew everyone was powerless to, like the guy in charge of most of the fucking universe. so they probably wouldn't tell the Jedi because the Jedi have massive bleeding, empathetic hearts and would starts sobbing the second they found out. But the Vode? oh yeah they all knew. They were the biggest gossips around because knowledge is power. They all learned on Kamino that everyone has to know everything, and that spread to the field where the Jedi would joke and call them massive gossips. They didn't get it, it took a while for them to figure out that natborns actually miscommunication A LOT. But they never did. They didnt because they all knew everything and didn't understand when some nat-borns got freaked out when they said something that felt normal to their vode.
i also think that Palatine wasn't as willy nilly with his powers as some people portray him as. He probably wasn't throwing lightning at the guards at every minor inconvenience. because the fucking Jedi temple was on planet with him!!! he was already playing the waiting game! he had barely any more waiting to do!
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xivu-arath · 1 year
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meeting kira
“Hey, can we talk for a second?” Kira asks, falling in step just a little behind them. Shenrihn glances at her, uncertain. The spaceport isn’t far, and delaying for a few moments likely won’t make much of a difference with their current objective.
They would rather not admit it, but taking a moment to do something apart from chase down thieves and gangsters and Sith is all too tempting. Running around Coruscant is exhausting, especially with the looming fear of what might happen if they slow down or let themselves be distracted while Master Orgus and Kiwiks are both risking their own lives.
Now, they can breathe. Not for long, but a few minutes won’t hurt anyone.
“Of course. What is it?”
“You really don’t like being stuck with me, do you?” she says with no warning, and halts so they have to turn and stop as well to face her. Shenrihn frowns, searching for any hint of some kind of taunt or trick, but all the Force offers is rippling light and bright conviction. She is decidedly serious.
“What? Why say that?” they ask, dazed by how sure she seems of it. They review their memories of the few conversations they’ve had since Tython and find no evidence of insulting her, but that doesn’t mean they hadn’t.
“Oh, I don’t know... maybe the fact that you’ve barely said a word to me since you got on Coruscant. Believe me, I’d rather be with my master than trying to handle things on our own too, but that doesn’t mean we should ignore each other.”
“But we’ve spoken,” they protest, feeling as if they’ve somehow switched back to Rakatan without realizing it. “We’ve fought together. If I’ve insulted, it was not my intent but I don’t know you – not enough to like, or dislike, or anything.”
Things do seem so much simpler when they’re on their own. How did they get a droid and another padawan tagging along with them?
Kira looks at them for a moment more, and Shenrihn feels the careful flicker of her reaching out to them in the Force and then she claps her hands to her face. “Oh, kriff it, you’re shy. I didn’t even think of that. Ugh, look, I’m sorry – Master Kiwiks always says my tongue is about ten parsecs ahead of my brain.” They nod uncertainly, which seems to be all the input needed. “I was so sure you were full of yourself since all the Temple gossip was just about how great you were now that you’d come back from Ilum.”
They wince, remembering what the gossip on Tython had been like before they’d left for Ilum in the first place. “It was so kind only because I could be of use now,” they tell her, calming themselves before any of that old, bitter rage could surface. “The Jedi were much harsher on me when I first became a padawan.”
“Shows what I know,” she says, taking the correction in stride with enviable ease. “I got to the Temple after you left, so all I heard were Masters muttering about how bad it was to have to take two older padawans at once. I guess I believed more of it than I should have.” She shrugs her mistake away and offers an outstretched hand, while Shenrihn tries not to shy away from the thought of taking it. Jedi should not be afraid of contact, but then, they are not quite Jedi yet. “Let’s... start over then. Kira Carsen, Jedi padawan to Master Kiwiks.”
Their own hands clench, the tattoos thankfully covered. “Shenrihn, Jedi padawan to Master Orgus Din,” they say, and are relieved when she drops her hand without even a flicker of annoyance. “...It’s nice to meet you.”
“Same here. But I guess we should get moving – the galaxy isn’t going to save itself, right?”
The galaxy, they hope, can look to someone else to save it, but they follow her towards the spaceport anyways.
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potatotalksculture · 1 year
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Potato Tweet: Watching Friendly Space Ninja‘s newest video essay on Gossip Girl 2021. And I might have an idea. The easter eggs are already out there.
So how about this:
Crossover of You, Emily in Paris and Gossip Girl 2021. Emily acts more and more strange, openly omits talking about her past and suddenly leaves Paris and everything she has there behind. She goes back to the US. She heads to New York for… some reason.
Joe Goldberg from You is actually Dan Humphrey from Gossip Girl. Once a stalker always a stalker. He returns to New York to follow one of his once obsessions - Emily. The one that got away. (Credit for the You/Emily in Paris goes to Amanda the Jedi. A round of applause, please!) He becomes an English teacher at Constance. After Kate helped him clean his name it’s totally doable even if some people would recognize him as Dan.
In Constance he meets those crazy ass teachers who assume the role of the Gossip Girl and the seemingly woke students, who actually are all talk. He likes the first group as much as the latter - absolutely not. He hates all of them, following his trope of being angry about others bigotry whiteout acknowledging his own.
Emily needs to confront everyone on her way while trying to uncover the truth about Joe. She’s not naive or narcissistic, she’s been gaslit for many many years by Joe. Maybe some sweetheart of his after the marriage with Serena broke down? I think seeing her confronted with the teachers on the one side and the students on the other night cast some interesting light on her character.
The cage is back. People get hurt. And you see Joe Goldberg’s face while his voice readers some notes from Gossip Girl out loud.
Chills?
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stinkythehutt · 6 months
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considering that canonically we know anakin is a robotics nerd with 1 friend (who he calls Dad by mistake at least once a week) and 0 rizz, i’m very enamoured by the fact that in any NO66 Good End AU, all of the jedi would be so confused that HE was the one with the secret wife. i have a scene in my head where a couple council members, let’s say depa and mace, are chilling gossiping and depa says “omg GUESS who’s secretly married” and mace names every single member of the order living and dead before guessing anakin
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secrettreestuffidk · 2 years
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just just just had a dream that dimensional overlap was literally such a common take-for-granted event that when in class and gossiping about our teacher we had to specify if it was the version of him from dimension A or B that was like married or whatever
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pasukiyo · 1 month
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TAKING OVER ME
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anakin skywalker x f!reader word count; 3,801 warnings; unprotected p in v sex, reader is a sex worker summary; you haven't been able to get your mind off of the handsome jedi knight since the first night you laid with him. and now he's back, but something seems off...
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 The Jedi Knight was coming again. 
 The other girls grumbled their displeasure and glared her way as she applied her lipstick, rubbing her lips together while she touched up her makeup in the vanity mirror. She paid them no mind however— she knew they were only envious. 
 It’s not like she could blame them. Never before had she ever actually looked forward to working with a client, in fact, if you had told her she’d be this giddy like a young school girl just a month ago, she’d scoff as if it were the most ridiculous thing she’d ever heard. No one was just excited to do this kind of work anyways, it was just a way to get by before, a way to keep a roof over her head and food in her belly. 
 It’s not like she still wanted this life for herself. Not at all, actually. If it were her choice, she’d have run away with the handsome Jedi long ago. But she told herself that if this was the only way she could have him, even for a few nights at a time, then it was worth it. 
 And he was coming back today. 
 This was only the third time he’ll have come to her, the third time in the span of a few months but she’d been dreaming of this moment since she saw him last. She’d practically been on a whole other planet since the last time he left her, she couldn’t even bring herself to care when she’d been called for other clients, didn’t even care when the gross Mon Calamari man came in last night. 
 It would all be meaningless come tonight, when she finally saw him again. 
 “How come she gets the actually appealing clients, Lizcar?” Vitta, a Twi’lek asked from the vanity beside her. She rolled her eyes as she touched up the blush on her cheeks, catching a glimpse of their Rodian employer, Lizcar, through her reflection in the mirror. 
 “It is not like I choose the girls for them, ho-tah,” Lizcar scoffed as she approached where she sat, eyeing her features through the mirror. She suppressed the urge to grimace when Lizcar approached, the strong scent of Ryll lingered on the Rodian’s breath and clothes. “The Jedi pays good money,” she said at last after a prolonged moment of silence. “See to it you are on the best of your behavior tonight, yes, kwa-sah tee?” 
 Lizcar reached out with her long, noodle-like fingers to drag them against the underside of her chin and she blinked away her distaste, peering up at her employer through her darkened lashes. “Yes, Lizcar,” she replied simply, silently willing her Jedi Knight to hurry up and rescue her from her awfully smelling boss. 
 Lizcar hummed low as she retracted her fingers, relief washing over her as the Rodian turned and made her way towards the door. “I will come and fetch you when he arrives,” she said before slipping out the door and she watched as it slid closed behind her. 
 The girls in the room continued their gossip, a mixed jumble of Basic, Huttese, and other languages permeating the room. Vitta, however, slid away from her vanity stool and she watched as the Twi’lek approached out of her periphery, her breath hot as she leaned down to face her reflection in the mirror. The Twi’lek’s seafoam green eyes bore into hers and the cerulean skin of her hand soothed down from her bicep down to the crease of her elbow. 
 “I wonder what the Jedi Knight sees in a simple girl like you,” Vitta’s voice said in a soft hiss, each syllable laced with a hint of venom. The Twi’lek’s animosity was palpable in her touch and she found herself grimacing, eyelids narrowing as she gazed at the woman beside her. “You are so plain,” Vitta continued, plucking a strand of hair from behind her back and tossing it before her face, a corner of her purple lips curving in a smirk when she twisted her face in displeasure. “So basic.”
 “And yet, he did not pick you,” she replied in a hiss, turning to glare at the Twi’lek beside her. Vitta’s gaze darkened as she turned to bare her teeth, lip curled in challenge. Just before either could say any more, the door once again slid open for Lizcar to step back inside, calling her name. 
 “The Jedi is here for you, mwa-shashi,” she announced and she gave Vitta one last hard look before she rose from her seat, the Twi’lek, too, straightening her posture. With one last look at the blue girl before her, she spat, “have fun with the Snivvian.”
 And with that, she pushed past Vitta, the thin lace of her long, black cover-up flowing behind her as she followed Lizcar out of the beauty room and into the foyer. The Jedi Knight was not there, however, and she turned to face Lizcar quizzically. 
 “He has already gone up to your room,” she stated as she circled around the front desk, bending down to reach for a bottle she had tucked away out of sight. “Seemed very worked up. Wouldn’t doubt that you have your work cut out for you tonight.”
 She couldn’t help but feel the corners of her lips twitch at this as she made her way to the staircase, practically skipping every other step just to ensure she could reach her room faster. She could feel her heart lurch as it beat in her throat when she approached the door of her bedroom, willing herself to breathe and relax as she pressed the button on the panel beside it, the door sliding open. 
 The room was dimly-lit, illuminated solely by the setla lamp in the corner. A tall, dark figure stood with their back turned to where she stood and her heart skipped a couple of beats as the door slid closed behind her. The Jedi Knight still did not turn and she did her best to keep her composure, although it was proven difficult when she knew how good he could make her feel. 
 “You’re back,” she managed at last, speaking through a lump of saliva that had formed at the base of her throat. The Jedi Knight hummed as she cautiously approached, her fingers wary as they traced the line of his elbow through his thick, dark robes. She circled around until at last, his side of his face came into view, the thin scar that fell in a line down the end of his eyebrow, the plush of his pink lips that pressed themselves together in a firm, thin line. 
 This was hardly the first time she’d ever seen him but still, the sight of him never failed to take her breath away. It was truly devastating how beautiful he was, like a fallen angel who just so happened to stumble into their galaxy. He was simply unreal, for a human especially. 
 “I’ve missed you,” she whispered, finding his gaze beneath the darkness casted on them by his lids. His eyes were like endless pools of deep blue, like the murkiest waters of Kamino. There was something darker in them now, however, something she couldn’t quite place. Something was troubling him, it didn’t take a Jedi to sense it. Lizcar appeared to be right— she did have her work cut out for her. “Something ails you… are you alright?”
 The Jedi Knight— whom she didn’t have a name for, for either of their safety’s sake— let his eyelids fluttered closed, his chest heaving as he drew in a deep breath. Her brow furrowed as she watched him, as the arm she had been gently gripping onto moved, his other hand— his mechanical hand— wrapped around her wrist, dragging it up to his face. She gasped when her knuckles connected with the warm flesh of his cheek, when she flexed her fingers and could feel just how soft his lips were. 
 “I’ve missed you too,” he said at last, turning his lips into the skin of her hand and she shuddered when he placed a kiss there. His fingertips pressed into her wrist and she pressed her lips together as he placed a kiss to her knuckles, another to the tips of her middle and forefinger, trailing his mouth down to her wrist. 
 Goosebumps erupted over the expanse of her skin as he worked his kisses down her arm, using her arm to pull her into him as his lips reached her shoulder, trailing from her collarbone, up her neck, to her chin where he peppered kisses along the expanse of her jaw. He nuzzled his nose against the underside of her jaw just beneath her ear and breathed her in, as if he’d been craving her just as much as she him. 
 “I’ve missed the way you smell,” he said and she gasped when he kissed the lobe of her ear, his teeth gently nibbling on the soft skin there. “I’ve missed your skin. The way it feels. The way you feel.”
 She whimpered when he trailed his kisses back down her jaw until they reached the center of her throat, pressing the most delicate of kisses there. Then, his mouth made its ascent back up her chin until it reached hers, their lips touching but not quite. She was shuddering, her lips quivering against his in anticipation. 
 The Jedi Knight let his eyelids open and she, too, looked at him, his gaze so dark she swore she’d be reduced to a puddle at their feet any moment now. Locks of dark blonde hair fell over his eyes and she resisted the urge to reach up and swipe it away just as his lips parted once more. 
 “The noises you make whenever I so much as touch you.”
 Heat flared from her chest and fell down in a line to her center, warmth swirling and wetness pooling in the thin panties she wore. The Jedi Knight pressed his lips harder into hers, sealing them in a kiss. Her knees began to wobble and she swore she’d be a puddle of magma at their feet had his hands not been there to support her. 
 Her fingers clutched at his shoulders as his tongue swirled inside the expanse of her mouth, and it didn’t take much for him to have full control over hers. She mewled into his mouth, leaning into him for more until he pulled away, either of their chests heaving as they chased air back into their lungs. Cold bit into her skin as he removed himself altogether from her and she fought back a whimper as he removed the outer layer of his robes, dark gaze never once leaving hers. 
 “I’ve been from planet to planet nonstop since the last time I saw you,” he said in a low murmur as she lowered herself on the bed, slowly removing the lacy black cover-up she wore, the thin shoulder straps sliding down her shoulders. The Jedi Knight was down to just his pants, pulling the shirt he wore beneath all of his robes up over his head and letting it drop to the floor. “I’ve been to many beautiful places and met many new people yet, all I could ever think about was you.”
 She flushed at the confession as she unhooked her bra, tossing it aside so that she laid bare for him, save for the black lace panties she wore. The Jedi Knight’s deep blue gaze wandered over the canvas of her body as he approached, hovering over her, his fingers woven through her hair as he shook his head down at her. 
 “I don’t know what you have done to me,” he murmured. “But I cannot get enough of you.”
 He pressed his lips to hers again and she was putty in the palms of his hands, so eager for more of him that she didn’t know what to do with herself. His kisses ventured past her mouth, past her face, past her throat until they reached the valley between her breasts, his breath hot as it fanned over her skin. 
 “What have you done to me?” He whispered before turning to ravage one of her breasts, his tongue swirling over the peaked bud, her lips parting in a gasp as her chest heaved closer into his mouth. He removed his lips from one bud only to venture over to the other, truly not letting a single part of her body untouched. Her fingers wove themselves through the messy locks of his hair and she could just make out the dark gaze he was giving her through hooded lids, tossing her head back into the pillows behind her when he pulled away.
 His kisses traveled down her belly until they reached the hem of her panties, pressing his lips against the lacy material. “I couldn’t stop touching myself at night thinking about how good you feel when you are wrapped around me,” his voice spoke in a low husk and she mewled as his fingers curled around the hem of her underwear, tugging them down her legs agonizingly slow. 
 “Please,” she gasped when he finally ripped her panties away from her body altogether, feeling his breath as it approached her arousal. She squirmed beneath his gaze, wiggling her hips, desperate to have him closer. The Jedi Knight simply watched and she swore she could feel the intensity of his gaze on her pussy, on the slick that was surely dripping down her slit. “I need… please.”
 He glanced up at her through the dark of his eyes, slowly lowering himself closer to her throbbing heat, his lips but a mere whisper away from her sensitive bud. Her hips bucked, or rather, they tried to anyway before an invisible force held them down, away from him. Her eyelids snapped open and she peered down at him, his hands on the mattress beside her body. 
 He was using the Force on her. 
 “Patience,” he tittered and he was so close to her, she could feel the half crescent shape of his lips against her heat. “I plan to take my time with you. To rid you of the memories of the nights between when I last saw you.”
 She was a mess and he hadn’t even touched her yet. She struggled against the Force, desperate for any sort of friction she could gather. It was no use, however. He was too strong and she huffed, deflating in defeat. 
 The Jedi Knight chuckled at her realization that she was defeated, lowering his head until his lips could place the softest of kisses against her clit. She gasped at the abruptness of his kiss, her chest heaving in anticipation as he kissed her again and again and again. The Force pried her legs open and his arms hooked beneath her thighs, tugging her in even closer. 
 His tongue flattened against her entrance and she hissed through her teeth as he licked one, agonizingly slow stripe up her slit, flicking his tongue against the underside of her clit in the process. Sweat already began to bead on her hairline and oh, how she ached for more. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted his tongue or his fingers or his cock inside of her— all she wanted was him as close as possible. 
 “Please!” She mewled as he teased her tongue at her entrance, as if playing with his meal. The Jedi Knight chuckled, “such manners.”
 And then she was done for. 
 He buried his tongue inside of her, so deep that she wasn’t sure it was impossible for a tongue to be able to reach that deep inside of her. She was a shining, writhing mess as he ravished her pussy, practically shoveling her orgasm out of her with his tongue. Her hand reached for his curls again, tugging at his scalp, to which she earned herself a hum of approval, the vibration sending her even further down the tunnel of bliss. 
 The Force was back on her hips the second she began to buck them again, holding her down and ensuring he wouldn’t let a single drop of her release go to waste when she finally let go. Tears stung the outskirts of her eyelids as she came and she swore she could see the entire galaxy when he worked her through her orgasm with his tongue, lapping every last drop she had to offer up. 
 When he pulled away, she cried out, wanting more, needing him on her again. The Jedi Knight’s lips and chin glistened with her slick and he chuckled at how desperate she was as he pulled away to tug his pants down his legs, finally letting his cock spring free of its restraints. Even through the blur of her tears, she could make out just how big he was, could already feel her mouth begin to water at the sight. 
 “Please,” she murmured as he approached like an eclipse, casting a shadow over her. He was so big that all she could see was him, all she even cared to see was him. It was times like this she wished she had a name to put to his face, that she had a name that she could call out to, to moan. He was her beautiful stranger, her beautiful enigma she wished she could know everything about. 
 “You’re so… desperate,” he sighed as he hovered over her, pressing his lips onto hers for a brief kiss. “The most gorgeous thing I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
 Once again, the Jedi Knight was able to steal the breath from her lungs, to leave her speechless. She sighed as he kissed her again, as his hard length prod against her thigh before against her entrance, gasped when the girthy head broke past the barrier between her folds. 
 She tensed and cried when he pushed just an inch further in and he shushed her, kissing the tears away from her face. “Relax,” he cooed, waiting until she eased before pressing himself further inside of her. Still, he wasn’t all the way in but still, she felt so full. 
 “You’re so… hngh!” She cried when he snapped his hips further to sheathe the rest of himself inside of her, her nails etching crescents into the flesh of his shoulders. The Jedi Knight kissed her just below her eye again, pressing kisses all the way down to the shell of her ear. 
 “Call me by my name,” his whisper curled around her ear and she fluttered her eyes open, just making out the darkness of his stare through her watercolor vision. “But… but I—“
 “Anakin.”
 She gasped when he pulled out almost all the way just to snap his hips back into her again, feeling full to the brim with him yet again. Anakin. He had a name and felt like he trusted her enough to share it with her. Something sacred fell between them, like a thread had been sown between their souls to bridge them together. 
 She now knew his name. 
 “Anakin,” she breathed when he kissed her again, pulling away so that he could grip the headboard of the bed with his mechanical hand, his other grabbing a fistful of her hip. He cursed when she said his name for the first time, using the headboard as leverage to buck his hips into her again, harder each time. 
 “Say it again,” he groaned, fucking into her so hard that the bed was shaking, his grip on the headboard not enough to keep it from etching dents into the wall. 
 “Ana…! Anakin!” She yowled as his tip bruised her cervix over and over and fucking over again. White hot bliss scorched her skin, Anakin had taken over every single one of her senses until all she could think about was him. He was a parasite, infecting every sense of her being until she couldn’t think straight anymore. 
 She wasn’t quite sure she cared. 
 “Anakin!” She screamed again as she pulsed around him, squeezing his cock so tight that he cursed and fell until his lips were against her neck, sucking marks into her skin. She was so close to the edge, so close to succumbing to the bliss that she almost didn’t quite hear him. 
 “Run away with me.”
 She blinked, his pace never once stopping despite her own world coming to a screeching halt. Surely she didn’t hear him right?
 “Wh— what?” She managed to ask through the murky slime of her mind, trying to make sense of what she just heard. Anakin lifted his head from the crook of her neck until their gazes could crash into one another again, much like a supernova. She mewled when his hips slowed but still, the feeling of him inside of her stayed. 
 “You heard me,” Anakin drawled, his mechanical hand woven through her tresses while the other caressed her cheek with the pad of his thumb. “I know you hate it here. So leave with me.”
 She was at a loss for words, her mouth opening and closing but nothing could come out. She wasn’t sure what to say— was this not what she had been daydreaming about only hours before?
 Still, a tiny voice in the back of her mind told her this was just a joke, that he couldn’t have been serious. Yet, when she stared deeper into his dark blue gaze, she wasn’t convinced that he was just jesting. 
 “But where… I…”
 “Don’t worry about that,” he shook his head, cupping her cheek in his palm. “Let me get you out of here. I can’t stand to be without you and… and I know you’re not happy here and I…”
 She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She leaned forward, lifting her head until their lips were connected, stealing his breath away this time. 
 “Yes,” she breathed against his mouth once they had broken their kiss. “Take me away with you.”
 Anakin smiled, white teeth peeking from the cracks of his lips. He bucked his hips into her again and she gasped, clutching the bedsheets as he grabbed either of her hips, fucking into her at such an animalistic pace, she wasn’t quite certain how she would even manage to run away with him if she couldn’t walk. 
 “Gonna be all mine,” he murmured beneath his breath as he pushed her towards that edge once again. In the back of her mind, she could only imagine the rampage Lizcar would go on in the morning when she realized her top girl was gone. She could imagine the look on Vitta and the other girls’ faces when they all realized who she must’ve left with. 
 And she smiled up at Anakin just as either of their orgasms washed over them. 
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a/n; so uh happy Easter!! 😭 not sure if this is the most appropriate thing to post on Easter but you know....
anyways, me?? posting two days in a row??? (do not get used to it LMAO)
TAGLIST;
@your-nanas-house
@chaoticevilbakugo
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angelltheninth · 8 months
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Could you do romance tropes with Star Wars characters?
I sure as hell can!
Pairing: Anakin, Obi-Wan, Darth Maul, Kanan, Poe, Kylo Ren x Reader
Tags: fluff, secret relationship, making out, sneaking around, flirting, denial, confession, lots of tension
A/N: I should expand on these one of these days cause they're all so good.
ANAKIN + NOBODY THINKS IT WILL WORK
He is a big flirt so of course everyone figures that it's a short term thing. Almost like they're just waiting to see how long you last before Anakin gets bored of you. No one except for you can see just how much he's fallen for you. It may have started with nothing but lustful nights and kisses but it's so much more now. He's seeking you out, holding your hand, talking about what will happen after the war, how he can give you a good life. He swears he will make things work.
OBI-WAN + UNREQUITED LOVE
He knows there's something there from how you look at him, he can feel it on his own heart as well, a feeling that Obi-Wan hasn't felt in so long. Of course he needs to wait until things have settled down before he does anything about this feeling. It's not that you don't like him back, you do but you can't bring, allow yourself to love him. You know it would tear him apart to have to choose between you and the Jedi. So when he confesses you convince him, and yourself that you don't love him back.
DARTH MAUL + LOVE/HATE RELATIONSHIP
Oh man, the tension between you can't be cut even by a lightsaber. No matter how many times you say you hate each other you always find a way into each others arms. Everything you do has an undertone of competition, it's way you both always walk away with so many marks on you. When you and Maul work together you always tease each other, you always try to fluster the other by outdoing each other and somehow relaying it back to the things that happen behind closed doors.
KANAN + LOVERS IN DENIAL
You live together, you sleep together, you tease and flirt and kiss each other, but no, you and Kanan are not lovers. You're together because you fit each other like a glove but you both deny any romantic feelings there. It makes you the subject of much gossip in the Rebellion but you try not to let it get to you much. When you think you hear the other confess you pretend it didn't happen. Not yet. You're gonna confess properly after the war. Until then what you have is enough.
POE + UNDERCOVER RELATIONSHIP
You and Poe get along really well, which is why you were chosen for an undercover mission. It was supposed to stay only that, you should have remained professional, but your hands and mouth and tongues had other plans. It may have started as an undercover relationship but by the end of the mission it's looking more like that was just an excuse for your true feelings to come to light.
KYLO REN + SUNNY VS GRUMPY
He doesn't want anyone to know you're in this sort of a relationship. You have to sneak in and out of his bedroom, but little doors he know that it makes you very happy to know you have such a special place in his heart. He will never admit it, he will have his angry face on whenever you point this out to him and it won't go away if you kiss him, you have to work much harder to get Kylo to stop frowning.
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padawansuggest · 5 months
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Okay so on Coruscant there are very few people that don’t actually go out into the streets (I’m thinking politicians and Jedi might be some of the few who don’t have to go outside very often if at all because the senate and the temple are both the size of a small city) which means that 1: they NEED to have vitamin D lights on the streets of Coruscant because otherwise everyone would be depressed like in the deepest winter at all times. And 2: that means I think the Jedi temple and the senate themselves also are just full of Vitamin D lights.
Also y’all need to stop writing fics where kids are afraid of ‘getting caught sneaking around after dark’ or something because the temple is literally so full of species that you have no idea of that kid is nocturnal or whatever. They very well could be. Tbh I wanna write a fic where someone catches Obi-Wan sneaking around at night to play a prank with Quin or something and he’s all ‘bruh my eyes glow in the dark I’m obviously meant to be awake at this hour’ and no one can argue with him. Stuff like that.
Also I think the temple neeeeeeeds multiple healing halls (once more. It is the size of a small city) one in the aquatic center of the temple (which canonically exists) one in the temple main (which should span over like four levels and act as it’s own building okay) and one in the creche. This is the MINIMUM amount of healing halls I think they should have.
A tram system should be inside the walls. Places in the temple that act as sideways lifts and also a subway system because believe it or not, there are species in the temple as small as one foot tall, and I’m not just talking about Grogu, I’m talking about others like Kushiban and others similar. Once more. It is the size of a small city. They should have both subway type stations (that take you certain places like the main healing halls or the biggest canteen or the supply sector of the temple things like that) because oh my god imagine how many hours the commute to your workstation could take if you didn’t have that shit. Annoying af.
They gotta have names for all the different canteens okay. Like ‘meet me in the cafeteria’ in a temple the size of a small city is bullshit cause even in the books they have multiple cafeterias.
A… let’s call it a Mall Section of the temple. A place where you can pick up groceries (the temple makes their own food and I assume most of it is cooked in careens but also not letting people cook their own food is a recipe for a Jedi starving to death on a mission lmao) but they also have a salon (skin care and hair care are very important and if you let all these babies cut their own hair they gonna turn out like me no one wants that) and a clothing ‘store’ where you can get certain size clothes and robes from, or even undercover mission clothes. There need to be Jedi in these places too!!! Imagine going to the salon with your master and having a gossip talk about your new lineage member!!! It’s important to society!!!
A Jedi movie theater where the masters send their kiddos on the weekend so they can enjoy a glass of wine and not be sneezed on for three hours.
I’ve actually seen a few mentions in fics and posts about tea salons so that is def also a thing. It’s the Jedi version of a cafe. I think people who like baking take turns working there and everyone chips in for tea selections and stuff.
Droid Ubers. They need to get somewhere but feel sick as heck and it’s not near any good lifts or the subway trams??? Call a droid Uber lmao. It shouldn’t be unusual either lol just grandmaster on his way to bother his kid while not aggravating his hip after hip surgery.
Remember that Jedi who are like 10 foot tall also exist so remember there ARE apartments in the temple that could fit Kenobi’s Dino-Horse girl Boga.
There should also be apartments with like 10 bedrooms and bathrooms (or even one giant communal bathroom) around a singular living/cooking space!!! Let Jedi live in communes!!!!
The aquatic levels of the creche are def the cutest place in the temple you can’t argue with me on the idea of water babies swimming and cuddling under water.
On another note to the fact that species like Kushiban exist???? Imagine tiny doors and corridors that used to be used by mouse droids but they became so useful to tiny Jedi so they got taken over. Just imagine that.
Bartering markets where Jedi trade things, mostly things they get on missions or are given to them as gifts, nothing goes to waste so they find a proper place for all gifts and extras here.
Cooking classes. Obi-Wan has been kicked out of all of them his cooking is so bad. Anakin claims bullshit he loves Master’s cooking! But then, he also eats worms…
Anyways. Y’all too single minded with this shit. It just be all ‘cafeteria, living quarters, healing halls and archives’ with you guys. Where is the culture. Where is the acknowledgment of multiple species all living in the same area taking place in a culture of peace and galactic exploration???? Give them a liquor store idgaf.
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jeeaark · 3 months
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last shirtless silly I swear- Friendship power ref and Sexy pjs ref
I always thought it was a glitch when Halsin and Jaheira appeared in this scene, but maybe the tadpoles are getting stronger. Or maybe even tadpoles are capable of character growth and are now considering non-tadpole people part of the tadpole gossip family???????
Love how it was the ol' folks of the team that the tadpoles snitched to. Maybe they were all awake at the time. Having a 'back in my day' or 'kids these days' chat.
So part 2. USUALLY. I try to separate my patch 0 play to any patch 5+ plot-hole fixes. Because when nobody said ANYTHING after the tadpoles snitched on Greygold's ass, I had to play the rest of the game while going on a whim of my own interpretation of that WTF moment.
Had to surmise that maybe squid buddy somehow convinced everyone it was 'just a dream', so nobody wanted to talk about it. So. At least I wasn't too far off???
But, after hearing officially that the Emperor did a 'you-didn't-see-that' jedi trick, I thought of a funny so. I made an exception.
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enviedear · 6 months
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holy terrain ⟶ anakin skywalker
description ⌙ anakin can't deny the pull his bratty princess has over him, or rather, has always had over him.
pairing ⌙ anakin x f!princess!reader
warnings ⌙ nsfw, 18+ mdni i will block you. mean(ish)!anakin, equally mean(ish)!reader, they're toxic 'friends', an unreciprocated childhood kiss, also an unexpected kiss, mention of alcohol, brief mention of anidala (they're not tg), a flashback (it's not long dw), improper acts in a royal garden, fingering f!receiving, use of the nicknames petnames princess and jedi, no use of y/n.
word count ⌙ 4.1k
— request | masterlist
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ur gonna have to pry anakin & princess!reader fics from my cold dead hands
loosely based off of mother's song.
to the untrained eye, the elaborate ball around you would seem perfect, flawless even. a truly divine display of political power and proceeds all around, but all you're able to take note of is the glaring absence of a certain jedi knight.
it's not your place to ask for his whereabouts, and the idea of anyone knowing that you're looking for him has your head throbbing.
you'd grown up with him, running around the halls of both the jedi temple and your castle respectively.
while your mother, the queen, would discuss and debate with the senior jedi and pompous planetary delegates— you were off getting the young padawan into trouble.
you've never been the most considerate to him— rather, you liked to tease and push him around. anakin was your first and only acquaintance to allow you to deter from the rigid nature of your regality.
he'd take your witticisms and throw some back at you with even more vigor, and when you'd roughhouse with him he never drew back his hits.
he was anakin, and to him, you were just you.
but since the war, and its recent end— you've seen little of him. the most, if only, of him you've seen has been on your holopad.
'hero without fear', the words most always surrounding his likeness.
you're half inclined to think that the boy you grew up with may now be too substantial for you.
you fiddle with your dress' skirt, trying to keep your eyes from drifting back to the jedi and their apprentices who are present, lined in an almost perfect row against a wall. one more glance and you fear you may be drawn into a long conversation about the force, and you'd rather brood in your corner than deal with that.
your body goes stiff at the feeling of two hands coming from behind to clutch your shoulders, "princess, don't tell me you're sulking."
the voice that hits your ears is familiar and warm, and you fight back a grin as you turn to face the young man, "no. but i will now you're here."
his lips upturn in a simper, "oh, then shall i leave you? all alone?"
you hum, in faux thought, "never! i always need a jester at my side. what could be better than your funny face?"
you take him in while he laughs off your quip. his hair is neatly out of his face, longer and more curly than you've ever seen, and his long arms have become fuller, muscles apparent even with his tunics and robe.
his black and flowing garments starkly contrast your fitted and fair-shaded gown, and you take it as a reminder of your evident differences. anakin is a warrior now, while you're left to relegate menial court duty. in a strange way, you envy him.
his path has standards and steps to prove to him and everyone else that he is growing, learning, and becoming more. in your case, you come up lacking.
most people look and speak to you as though you're an idea. a sheltered royal with little to no concept of the galaxy around her.
you like to believe their whispers weren't true, but as you look upon your jedi companion, you feel a deep sense of ineptitude. how could you compete or compare to someone who has seen more planets than you could even name?
you put a small smile on your face, trying to block out your thoughts, "how have you been? i heard a certain senator has been keeping a close eye on you."
anakin's eyes narrow, "royal gossip? may i be privy to such information, your highness?"
he's being coy and you know it, you bring your voice to a whisper, "amidala. i hear you've been seen fleeing her chambers."
he hums, hands coming to rest at his hips, "well, princess, are you asking if the whispers are true," he pauses, head dipping closer to you and whispering, "or are you confused as to what goes on behind closed doors?"
you roll your eyes, "i most certainly do not need any aid in understanding such matters. i have my fair share of suitors. i just wonder how long until such information finds itself back to your council."
he gives you a contemptuous look, "you think too highly of my affection toward her. besides, i've heard she's found someone new to engage with."
"you've heard, or you were told?" you can't help the smugness in your words. truthfully, you've known of anakin's obsession with the young senator for years, and when you learned of her shared interest in him at the beginning of the war you had a strange aggression towards the idea.
the knowledge of the endeavor finally coming to an end relieves an unidentified weight on your chest.
anakin waves you off, "the specifics aren't important, however..." he trails off, looking you up and down.
his words and look pique your interest, "yes, anakin?"
you watch as his eyes leave your form to scan the ballroom. guests are everywhere, leaving the room crowded— and the walls seem to reek of whiskey and nectar wine— usual amongst 'high status' officials.
anakin leans down to you to whisper into your ear, "follow me."
your eyebrows knit together but you do as you're instructed, slipping away from the noisy ball and out into the night air.
there are a few stragglers outside, either intoxicated, engaging in less than pure actions, or a mix of the two.
you look away from a couple touching each other hungrily to glower at anakin, "why are we out here?"
his head turns to look back at you before he continues forward, "patience, dear princess."
your face scrunches in confusion but you continue on, hands pulling your skirts off the ground as you enter into the royal gardens.
you've walked the path beneath you countless times, and one of your earliest memories of the footpaths was shared with anakin. his boyish face covered in dirt after you had convinced him to unearth a large plot of soil for a lake— in your honor of course.
he had spent hours on his assignment, promising that you'd get what you desired.
in truth, a twelve year old you desired no lake, you simply wished to see how far you could get him to go for you.
it was you who held the power then, and he was a faithful devotee— albeit to his masters' chagrin. No one was able to really understand the hold you held over him.
not even the pair of you.
the incident landed both of you in a great deal of trouble, and you were forced to spend the next morning filling said hole. little you was apt to make anakin do most of that chore himself.
not that he had complained.
after a few quiet minutes of walking, anakin stops at one of the smaller fountains in the green. one of the oldest landmarks in this garden, predating the lavish castle on its horizon. it sits surrounded by tall fruit trees, leaving the area sweetly scented and mostly hidden.
"do you remember when i pushed you into this fountain?" anakin asks, voice deviant and deep.
you ponder up at him, "yes, and i also remember how i pulled you in with me."
he hums, a light chuckle falling out of his lips, "hm, and what did i do right after?"
you think back to the day, you, fourteen, and he fifteen. your defensive action had made him so outraged at you. his teenage face had been vibrant pink and his knuckles white.
"maker, you're such a brat!" anakin's voice was riddled with annoyance as he pushed himself out of the fountain, "look at me! i'm all wet and master obi-wan is never going to let me hear the end of this."
you had simply laughed, following him out of the chilly water, "i'm not a brat, and you pushed me first! goodness anakin, you're so boring now."
he turned to glare at you, "don't say that— i am not!"
you rolled your eyes, "are too."
in one quick movement, he had your back pressed hard into one of the trees, "i'm not boring. and if you say it again i'll make you regret it, princess."
you weren't scared of him, you could never be scared of anakin, "well, skywalker, if you're not boring, why don't you prove it."
it had been a silly and childish remark, and you weren't exactly sure how you wanted him to showcase opposition to your teasing. you weren't sure if even he knew how, but his thumbs traced along the veins at your wrists. his touch had left the air around you soft and hushed.
his blue eyes met your own for a split second before he leaned down to you, flushed lips parting ever so gently. he let his hands drop from your wrists down to your hips, and you stiffened at the touch. he had never behaved in such a way before, and the contact had your heart racing.
with little time to think, you watched him erase the space between the two of you, pausing for a short instant, before closing the gap between you. your eyes had gone wide at the feeling of his lips on yours. those perfect lips, full and chapped, lamented at your own— so foreign and new to you.
there wasn't much to the exchange, very little movement on your end and your eyes had stayed open in shock the entire time. just as you thought to kiss him back— he had pulled away.
He had then wiped his lips with the back of his hand before speaking, voice higher than normal, "there. i'm not so boring." and with that, he ran away, back to the castle, and you didn't see him again until months later.
you'd never brought it up and neither had he, so his question had you reigning yourself in, eerily motionless. he had taken your first kiss and never mentioned it again, why would he bring it up now?
you can't shame him much for it, as you had replayed the memory back in your mind thousands of times. commonly going so far as to try and remember what he had tasted like, to memorize the feel of his hands on you.
your mind often wondered what your reaction would be now, you hoped you'd at least be able to kiss him back now. but anakin didn't need to know that.
with a sharp look at him, you reply, "you robbed me of my first kiss, jedi." you inflect when you mention his title, reminding him of his virtuous position.
his left hand finds a place on your waist, drawing you into him, "i've never been considered a thief before— is that really how you recall it, princess?"
you fight your fluster, refusing to cower down to whatever game he's playing at, "oh? what would you call it?"
he quirks an eyebrow, "unfinished."
your stare up at him, body turning to fully mirror his own, "excuse me?"
"incomplete, insufficient," you watch as his other hand, metal, and cool comes to a rest at your shoulder, tugging you even more so to him, "i'd hate to think that was as good as you could do, sweet princess. you couldn't even rally the courage to kiss me back."
you look at him and decide that the jedi knight before you has changed. no longer was he the boy who followed along with your every whim with silent invocation, no longer the young man who engaged in your childish games— instead, the man before you had a presence that alone could send your mind rushing into quite debauched places.
"who said i ever thought about kissing you back in the first place." your voice is barely a mutter, despite the teasing intention.
anakin gives you a smug look, head tipping to the left, "you've grown to be quite the liar, princess."
your words go pointed, "you've grown overconfident."
in truth, he hadn't. his assumptions were correct, but how could you give in to him so easily? anakin is almost entirely overpowering, but you can see the soft pink tint on his cheeks. and you know you have an equal, if not greater, effect on him.
his metal arm is stern against you, and you feel his grasp growing stronger, almost evidence of your words.
lips upturned, he speaks, "overconfidence isn't what this is, i only wish to be useful, princess. how cruel it is to have my dedication be met with apprehension."
his words inflict a firey sensation deep within you, and the atmosphere between you seems to build, fizzling around. you feel as though your sanity has become severed— evolving into an amalgamation entirely made of him.
"and how remiss would i be if i didn't let you fulfill your favor?" your voice feels shakey, but you allow your own hands to find his shoulders, digging in ever so gently and forcing him closer.
he chuckles, eyebrows darting up in surprise, "horribly remiss i'm afraid."
your lips curve, "and this favor," you pause, narrowing your eyes, "you think it should be a kiss? that seems self-seeking."
the knight looks down to your lips, mirth clouding his features, "this is purely for your benefit, princess. don't you deserve the practice?"
in the back of your mind, you could find a tactful solution to this situation. perhaps something that involves stepping farther away from the man peering down at you, but strangely, you've never wanted to be closer to him than you do now.
"as if i need it, jedi." your voice is low when you speak, and you catch anakin's adam's apple hitch up.
you feel like your body is humming as you slide your hands from his shoulders— grazing over his clavicle, up, and towards his neck. you watch his eyes widen slightly, and you can hear his little intake of breath— you got him right where you wanted.
you look up at him once more, silently looking for approval, gratitude, need— something. the blue eyes peering down at you fail to disappoint.
you let yourself stand a bit taller and pull him down to you, inching up until your lips graze his own. you feel his smile when your lips brush, and you bite your tongue before kissing him.
your kiss is deliberate and delicate, but you're fully in control.
he gives into you so easily. he waits for you to pull him closer before he follows suit, nose pressing into the side of your own. he tastes of fruit, and you let your tongue slide into his mouth, greedy for him.
he exhales at that, palming your hips and pressing himself into you ever so slightly. you let out a lewd breath at that, and anakin breaks the kiss to lean his forehead on your own.
you wait a second before looking up at him, and he stares back down at you. his lips part again, but this time you expect them to be followed by words. possibly an apology or a rejection.
he surprises you instead, by dipping down to you once more. his hands trail up from your hips, stopping just below your breasts. you groan when you feel his lips begin to leave kisses along your jaw, trailing down toward your neck.
your shared behavior is absolutely improper for both of you, but you can't seem to care while he's leaving lingering kisses upon your neck, sending goosebumps along your flesh.
your hands push upward, fingers knotting themselves in his hair. you let yourself give his locks a little tug just as he begins to suck on your skin.
you catch your breath from his raw and desperate action. your heart pounds harder, the sensation overcoming you, sending a swell of pleasure through you. he takes every signal you give him, pulling himself closer to you until you can feel the flutter of his heartbeat against your chest.
his lips graze your ear before he speaks, voice barely a whisper, "i'd say we're even now, princess."
your eyes remain closed at his words, enjoying the feeling of his breath against you, "i'm not so sure, jedi."
his hands find a home at both sides of your face, and you look up at him, "and how does my crime of stealing your first kiss continue to go unpunished?"
you're not sure of what to say for a second, shocked still by the look of conviction caught in his eyes, "i never said i wanted to punish you for it."
he moves one hand from the side of your face, tracing it back down towards your hips. he smiles at your words, and looks up at the sky before answering in a low voice," then how else should i show my appreciation?"
you take a step back, leaning against the tree for support. you can feel his gaze on you, but before he can say anything your own bravery speaks up, "appreciation?"
He lifts an eyebrow at your remark and tilts his head inquisitively in response, "yes princess, don't you want me to show you how grateful i am?"
You grin devilishly in response and answer him confidently, “i think i could come up with something."
he grins back lazily, humming a response, and moves closer, hands still firmly positioned on either side of your face. his lips meet the corner of your smile. he leaves a gentle kiss there before meeting your lips with so much passion that your body feels faint.
each trace of his lips sends electric sparks through your body as his kisses fall down your neck towards your collarbone. you shiver at the touch, as he brushes across each sensitive spot. you feel as if he's satirizing you in some way until his lips finally meet the delicate area around your shoulders— leaving soft nipping kisses that cause an uncontrollable moan to escape from you.
you feel his hands drop to your dress' skirt, bunching up the tight fabric and inching it up. when his skin makes contact with the flesh of your thighs, you let your forehead drop to his shoulder.
anakin seems to like this motion, breath hitting against your ear again, "do you want me to touch you, princess?"
you feel overwhelmed, unable to speak past the lump in your throat. you manage a slight nod before finally croaking out, "yes."
anakin's hands immediately respond, brushing up the side of your thighs until they find their way near your pulsing cunt. you feel obscene and exposed by your own need, but anakin seems to grow more confident the closer his fingers dance to you. you hear him laugh lightly as you press yourself into him, silently begging for more.
he abides by your wish, nimble fingers beginning to stroke your clothed slit. you moan at the contact, voice somewhat muffled as your head remains at his shoulder. anakin however chooses this moment to speak, tone falsely saccharine, "sweet princess, aren't you going to tell me what you want? use your words."
for a brief second, you feel impossibly hot and annoyed. you'd rather not voice your desperation for him. you'd be reckless to follow his orders so blindly.
"you're the one with your hands under my dress. what is it you're wanting, jedi?" you finally draw your head back from him, eyes catching his.
anakin lets himself grin, haphazardly letting his thumb brush your needy nub. he watches as you attempt to hide the roll of your hips, "i want you."
he doesn't continue with words, no, he slides your underwear to the side and feels your wetness against his fingers. he lets out a low groan when you grip him tighter.
your back is pressed into the tree behind you and anakin's body seems to lock you in place, not that you'd move away from him now. not when he's teasing your opening and causing your mind to go wild.
"tell me what you want," he smirks, one digit dipping ever so slightly into your heat, "and i'll obey."
you screw your eyes shut, trying to calm yourself. your voice is uneven when you respond, "touch me, please."
he doesn't neglect your demand and he lets his finger slide into you, slow. you clench around the digit, hands snaking into his hair and forehead pressing against his own.
he lets you feel him, as deep inside you as he can possibly get, before sliding out and back in again. you want to scream at the way his digit barely hits the spongey part inside of you, but instead, you let your hands grasp him harder.
he takes pleasure in your whiney noises, pushing further into you before sliding out once more. you whine at his teasing, and you catch the softest grin on his lips as he presses into you, two fingers this time.
you feel more full of him, and the notion has you reeling.
"maker, anakin." you barely hear yourself when you speak, voice so low.
he arches his fingers inside you, hitting the spot that sends your weight fully into his being, "yeah? am i doing a good job princess?"
you hum in assurance, blissful and teetering the edge. you feel drunk with how good he feels, how good he's making you feel.
"good," you moan. "so good."
you cry out his name in praise, only to be met by a lament. the rumble that answers you sounds like distant thunder colliding with sand and stone. a rolling sensation races through your body at the sound of it. your heart thuds in your chest and he watches its movements in delight.
he seems to like the way you're falling apart for him, eyes unwavering in their view of you. slowly but surely, you feel him putting pressure right where you need it until you can hardly handle it anymore. anakin thrusts his digits faster and faster, and you can't help but pull quite firmly at his curls.
his throat elicits a wanton groan at the feeling, and you feel yourself rock your hips to meet his hand. you're so close to the brink.
"do you want to come? hm, want me to make you feel good." you can hear the strain in his voice.
"please, ani." your voice begging, warm at your own words.
his thumb finds your clit again, this time though, his touch isn't feather-light. no, instead he's cruel in the way he massages the bundle of nerves, leaving you a moaning mess beneath his body. he knows exactly how much pressure to use as he presses down on your bud repeatedly. making it impossible to form a coherent thought inside your head.
instead, all you can focus on is the thumb on your clit and the two digits in your core—driving into you relentlessly and the other pressing into you until your eyes shine white, you can feel yourself blanking.
his digits continue to pump in and out of you, humming his approval at your vulgar display— your eyes are heavy, legs unsteady, and lip slightly raw from biting it.
"i'm so close, anakin." you pant, fingers stiffening in his hair.
he whines, "yeah? let go, princess, i've got you."
and with one final plunge of his digits in and out of your warmth you feel a rather sudden wave overcoming your body, jolting everything inside and outside too. the sensation is a pure high, and you claw at anakin's shoulders until the feeling begins to subside. the night air suddenly feels so chilly, but you nuzzle closer into anakin. with you face hidden, you allow yourself a satisfied smile upon your, as well as anakin's, lips.
anakin grins down at you and kisses the top of your head in adulation before slowly removing his hands from you. you feel him trail his fingertips up your spine before speaking in a raspy tone, "how was that, princess?"
your body feels as if it could quaver at the sight of this man before you— a strong and assertive jedi warrior— so taken with you, eyes brimming down with a mixture of pride and adoration.
he pushes himself back slightly, still hovering above you, and looks down into your eyes with an unmistakable warmth in his gaze. you'e sure no one had ever looked at you like that before—like they wanted to consume every fiber of your being, of your soul.
anakin's eyes search yours for a moment before he presses his lips gently against yours in a temperate kiss.
as he moves away again, this time, drawing away enough to extend his arm above your head, fingers now clutching the tree's trunk.
you both remain still there for some time, taking comfort in each other's presence, until finally, anakin speaks softly again,"i thank the force to have met you, to know you. i've missed you, princess." his voice sounds brazen yet gentle.
his free hand lifts, raising your chin up to look into his eyes once more.
you hum, "you've grown better with apologies."
anakin huffs, lips upturned, "maybe, or perhaps solely for my benefit regarding you."
you roll your eyes, "is that what this was? some self-aggrandizing ruse?"
he smirks, eyes widening in faux horror, "never, princess. i only mean to say that i seem to behave best in your company. you wield a tight reign."
you can't help but smile at the compliment, unabashed. "i have no hold over you, jedi."
anakin's lips quirk into a fiendish grin as he reaches up to gently brush his thumb along your chin, "of course you do, princess," he murmurs softly. "of course you do."
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