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saintobio · 13 hours

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HELLOOO FINALLY GOT TO SEND AN ASK!!!

first of allllll…. i think the time momjo sending the child guardian paper (?) that satoru typed out of anger is a hint…. and then satoru telling yn that sachiro called akemi mama… this honestly hurts alot more, imahine carrying your baby for 9 months, taking care of baby sachiro for 3 years alone, all the sleepless nights… and sachiro just ugh u dumbass small brain toddler (literally). anyways, satoru looking at akemi during suguru and shoko’s wedding, his hand rubbing akemi’s stomach at the cabin when she was in pain. honestly this part was akemi faking her pain or…? cuz there was a line that said after satoru asked if she wanted to go home her face didnt show anymore pain ? lololll idk. i dislike (hate) gojokemi but i think theyre gonna be endgame with all these theories coming up oh godddd. and the way yn threw the necklace into the lake, satoru went to search for it but did he manage to find it ? no. but during sn yn (well, suguru) found gojos wedding band. so in sy, yn threw away satoru’s “heart”, and it was never found again, thats a hint (?) bruhhh i hate thissss (i love this so much actually it made me feel so much i love u saint) i also recall the first time satoru and akemi first did it together he said smthg like i could learn to love u ? if i remember correctly. and the morning at the cabin after yn and gojo did it, yn was crying bcs they had a heartfelt talk ? and u mentioned they both felt guilty. the guilt is…. yeah.

BUT ALSO, satoru once said that yn has always been the one, sera when she saw gojo after forever told sukuna that he looks different when hes being with akemi, like hes not being himself? but that was when they first got together so idk about now. him not calling gojokemi exclusive. oh how they were happy and loving when yn got pregnant 🥹 but well it lasted until… yeah. also u said something about gojo gonna be on his knees again, since yn is now depressed and suicidal, i think for her heart disease shes gonna sign a DNR, then satoru on his knees maybe begging the doctors idk gawd idk someone mentioned dnr and i just… 🙂 its not that she wanna leave sachiro either, but i think shes telling herself everything will be better if she dies since sachiro, still very young, doesnt even really remember yn (just why sachiro) and called akemi mama… also why the hell didnt gojo use protection when fucking akemi oh gawd pls hate u satoru if she gets preggo.

anyways, i cant wait for gen to be back. i love u gen and ian.

oooh i also remember that you said there was a scene that inspired the birth of sn/sy, was it in chapter 11 ? or we’re not there yet…

honestly why dont yn just join shoko and suguru and be in a happy poly relationship ever looollll just kidding. my heart hurts, im still all in for gojoyn endgame but it doesnt seem realistic. ive been cursing gojo and akemi ever since the chapter came out loolll gotta give myself credit for being able to do my exams while still thinking bout this. 💀

omg there’s a lot to unfold here idk where to start 😭 but i just wanna say, it’s amazing how you’re so thorough in remembering those details in sn/sy bcos i honesty don’t have enough attention span to do that !!! sdjsj now while i can’t answer everything you mentioned, i can say a few things:

- akemi isn’t faking her pain, she’s truly struggling from it

- gojo doesn’t want kids outside of marriage (or should i say if not with yn), so he’s definitely careful with it.

- yes, it is indeed sy11 that birthed the sequel :’) i had that scene in mind before sn was even finished

#🖤: letters to saint #series: sincerely yours #thank you thank youuu for dropping by and sharing ur thoughts <33

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girlcrushau · 2 months

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#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/#but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment #i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating #there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2 #months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it #not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him #in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to.#until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if #he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone #and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think #there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy #your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you)#and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly #so last night #i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text.#i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart #until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent #that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real #did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart #and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about #and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in #which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever #it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in.#just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the #reason that he went away on me.#im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying #not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me #that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest.#and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs #he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am

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tannieastrology · 3 months

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Solar Return Observations #2🌻💛

🌼💛Just an update so far, I have a 5th house stellium in my chart this year and life has felt so carefree. Life made me get rid of my old crush and made me focus on myself for a while(Pluto) until just friday I met someone new unexpectedly(Vertex). I havent felt this feeling in almost 3 years its really exhilarating feeling like this and I actually have a good feeling about it. It felt like I was meant to cross paths with him at this point in my life right now because im actually focused on my higher self. I feel that Vertex along with other major planets like the Sun, Mars, Mercury, Pluto, and POF made meeting him feel fated because for one ever since Ive met him ive consequently crossed paths with him multiple times in just the span of 3 days. Its not a deep connection however(5th house) but I hope to beat the odds and make something out of it. So overall, Ive had lots of fun, peace, and new interests in love.

🌼💛So I recently just discovered this, but you can go and find your monthly/daily transit chart and overlap it to your natal or solar return chart to see how your school, career, family, or love life will be. I was wondering why was it that I never got the opportunity to meet someone in matters of romance but i did multiple times in friendships and then I saw that in my transit charts I never had Venus in the 7th house until last month. Venus had always been in like the 11th, the 10th, or the 3rd and school and friends was what was constant in my life. Sometimes even having Venus in the 8th can mean a change in your love life. I even looked all the way through 2022 and 2023 and all 12 months there was not one placement of Venus/Mars/Moon in the 5th or 7th until my transit chart of Febuary 29. Venus conjuncted Mars in the 8th and what happened? I saw the new guy who was exactly my type and I found interest in him. My next transit will be March 30 with Venus, Saturn, and Neptune in the 7th, and Mars conjunct the descendant. Im hoping that things will go well and I can get the courage to talk to him but we'll seeee.

🌼💛Having Jupiter in the 1st just means your whole year will be filled with luck youll just have things fall right into your hands.

🌼💛Uranus in the 9th house is lowkey feeling lost on what path you should take regarding school or just feeling disconnected from school in general. I have this right now and ive been having trouble locking in on my school work and i dont know how i want to plan my schedule for next year. Im just going with the flow atp.

🌼💛Venus in the 4th house means your family will spoil you and make you feel loved.

🌼💛Ok so im not really liking the attention ive been getting from having Lilith exactly conjunct the Ascendant. It feels like every where i go theres been men staring at me creepily and theres this guy on the track team who keeps touching me and crossing my boundries and personal space and it makes me so uncomfortable. Its so grimy and I hate it.

🌼💛Look at the dominant planet and see what house it falls in. Last year i had a dominant planet of moon and it fell in the 12th house conjunct mars. All imma say is that last year was one of the worse but strengthening years for me mentally.

🌼💛Venus in the 9th house means you’ll probably get a chance to travel. I had it in the 4th degree and i went to California from Texas because of a wedding on my moms side.

🌼💛Ive noticed that Vertex in the 5th doesnt always necessarily mean youll meet someone, it just means that youll get a lot of opportunities to go out and have fun.

🌼💛Saturn in the 6th/10th means standing on business.

🌼💛Chiron in the 5th may be a year where you feel burnt out. Make sure to take a break.

🌼💛Moon in libra will beautify a relationship depending on whatever house its in. Ex- first house: your appearance, 3rd: your relationship with siblings, 5th house: with your romantic partners or your inner self. It could also mean you feel romantic this year and could even have more opportunities given to you to express those feelings.

🌼💛7th house Neptune means having dreamy fantasies about people you wanna date. Could have your head in the clouds or you can just have high hopes regarding this area. Could be spiritually calming regarding partnerships but you can be manipulated and gaslighted too if your not careful.

🌼💛Venus in the 10th means being called beautiful all the time during that year. So many strangers used to stop me in the hallways to tell me I was pretty that year.

🌼💛Chiron and Neptune in the 1st means not being able to see your beauty.

🌼💛Venus or Jupiter in the 2nd means splurging on skincare, makeup, and clothes.

🌼💛Having Chiron in the 4th is not fun lol. Could mean family problems, struggling to feel at home when youre at home, and having trouble having a safe space.

🌼💛Leo Ascendant years will make you feel popular.

🌼💛Venus in the 6th could make you follow health, beauty, and workout routines or it could oppositely make you feel lazy and not wanna do anything. It also means feeling comfortable at work or find a interest at work.

🌼💛In 2020 when covid hit I had Saturn in the 5th house and it makes so much sense looking back. We were forced to be isolated and I couldnt go out because of the lockdown. Dont get me wrong though I still had alot of fun with my family but I feel like my middle school experience wouldve been alot different if that hadnt happened.

🌼💛Having a Cancer Ascendant back in 2015 was when my older cousin got married and that was a big event for our family that girl spent almost a 100k on her wedding. She was the first to get married out of the kids in the family. Even having Cancer degrees in the chart will mean change or some significant event in your family life.

Thats all for today hope yall enjoyed:)

#astrology #astrology observations #solar return #my observations

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firelordsfirelady · 2 months

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IV. Outburst

Author: @firelordsfirelady

Imagine: When Y/N—a princess of one of the Water Tribes—is told she’s leaving her tribe, she never expects that she’s to be betrothed to the Fire Lord’s son, nor was she prepared to be exiled the very day she arrived at the Fire Nation. With her life in the hands of her new fiancée, how will life change for the princess?

Pairing: Zuko x F!Reader

Trigger warnings: arranged marriage, feelings of fear, banishment, mentions of burns/abuse, frustration, violence, betrayal

Word Count: 1167

Destined to be Yin and Yang

I own no rights to Avatar the Last Airbender or any of the characters/story.

Author’s Notes

The characters as all aged up so Zuko’s banishment happens when he’s 16

Keep in mind I am bringing a unique world with inspiration from ATLA in their characters, some of the events that happen, bending, etc. Not many things may align or occur with what happened in the show. It’s intended that way, so I hope you enjoy it regardless.

See Y/N’s inspiration here.

Destined to be Yin and Yang Soundtrack (YouTube)

Zuko made no mention of the cookies the next morning, but I anticipated as much from the Prince. The crew, however, raved about my cookies and were quite happy to hear that I would make them plenty of cookies during our time together. I kept my promise because every full moon I would make the crew a batch of cookies and then practice my water bending on the deck before heading to bed. Of course, I never let Zuko or Iroh be out of the cookie receiving as I would deliver their plates before going to bed.

Thus began my new daily routine of lending a hand in the kitchen or helping with the dishes. I often found myself aiding in other chores around the ship, which only served to aggravate Zuko more. Zuko always made sure to make remarks about how informal of a princess I was, so I made it my mission to find ways to annoy the Prince further. Let’s just say that I was very good at it.

The first time Zuko saw me mopping the deck, he made a snide comment that earned him an accidental flick of some water from the mop bucket.

“Forgive me, Prince Zuko,” I had teased him that day. “I am merely just a princess who doesn’t know how to handle the mop.” Iroh hid his small chuckle at my comment, knowing all too well that I was more than capable of handling the simple mop. I think he found it mildly amusing that I teased the Prince often, and this served to agitate the Fire Lord’s son further.

Despite the banter from Zuko, I had grown to enjoy life traveling around on a ship. As a young girl, I had dreamed of what it would be like to see the world outside of the Tribe, but I quickly realized that as the princess I would never have those opportunities. Especially since after the Avatar disappeared from the world a century ago, the nations decided to sequester away from each other to protect themselves.

With Zuko on the quest to find the Avatar, he has been researching the previous avatars. We have been to several Avatar shrines across the nations and have been frequenting the other Water Tribes. Zuko was sure that the next avatar would be a Waterbender, and so we stayed near in case the Avatar made his appearance. Each time Zuko got a hint or a tip that there was a chance of the Avatar appearing, the ship would speed to the new destination. Disappointment met Zuko at every new stop, and I felt my heart break more as I watched the hope slowly die from his eyes. Yet, at the next whisper of a sign from the Avatar, Zuko would begin the cycle all over again.

The months slowly turned into years, and Iroh and I met regularly to drink tea together. During our tea visits, Iroh would tell me stories of dragons and the origin stories of Firebending, and, in return, I shared the stories of the Water Nation and our origin. I enjoyed listening to Iroh’s great accomplishments and was glad that I had found a friend in Iroh.

While my friendship with Iroh grew, I could not say the same about my relationship with Zuko. Three years of the same routine with Zuko had begun to wear the hope in me down. I tried my best to make an effort with Zuko in hopes that we might be able to at least tolerate each other. I gave him cookies every full moon, and I offered information that I read at the shrines regarding the avatar that might help Zuko. I did get a small glimmer of hope when he stopped calling me an informal princess after the first six months of life on the ship. After two years, there was light banter between us that was somewhat jovial, but the banter was more teasing than anything else.

That all changed today when Zuko had met another dead end in his search for the Avatar. Once we arrived back at the boat, Zuko’s anger was palpable as he stalked on to the deck. Iroh’s face was a look of concern as he watched Zuko clench and unclench his fists. I chewed my bottom lip as I slowly walked onto the deck behind Iroh, who shared a concerned look with me. My heart increased its pace in my chest as I opened my mouth to say something to the Prince.

“Zuko—“ I started, but Zuko whipped around on his heel and his golden eyes were bright with rage.

“You don’t get the right to call me Zuko.” He snapped in anger. “You’re a good-for-nothing princess who doesn’t understand her place.” My breath hitched as I prepared myself for whatever else he was about to say. “I can understand why my father wants me to find the Avatar, but I can’t begin to wrap my head around why the hell he wants me to marry you.”

“You’re prancing around this ship like it’s a vacation home. Cooking with the crew, cleaning the decks, and not to mention you’re waterbending during the full moon.“ Keeping my face straight, I felt hurt cloud my heart as Zuko spoke his next words with so much hate. “You make cookies to compensate for what you lack as a person. You’re a pathetic excuse for a princess, and I hate that you’re my betrothed.”

Zuko was breathing heavily as he finished his rant, and I swallowed the lump in my throat in a pathetic excuse to calm the tears forming in my eyes. Silence fell upon the entire boat as I composed myself. Part of me wanted to scream at him that he wasn’t the only one suffering here. A tiny part of me wanted to wrap him in a cocoon of ice and then walk away. Another part of me wanted to hug him because I could see he was frustrated, and I was the only person who he was set on taking his anger upon.

I did none of those things as I shook my head and walked away. His words cut me deep, but I refused to let him see the tears that silently fell from my eyes as I made haste to my bedroom. Once behind the security of the closed door, I let the tsunami wave of tears flow as I cried into my pillow.

After a few hours of crying, I lay in bed and I stared at the ceiling. My eyes were no doubt red and puffy from the amount of crying I had done. Though my eyes burned, I could not tempt my body into a thoughtless slumber. So, instead of sleeping, I got up from bed and lit the oil lamp on my desk. I grabbed some blank pieces of paper and a pencil then began doing the one thing that would distract me the most right now: draw.

Tag List @chevysstuffs @puttyly @ginger24880 @night-fall-moon @hypnoticbeing

#avatar imagine #zuko imagine #zuko x reader #avatar the last airbender #prince zuko #destined to be yin and yang

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ranhaitanisgf · 5 months

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hi! could i request headcanons or oneshot (either is okay) for bonten timeline sanzu haruchiyo with an excitable, extroverted reader? thank you so much, and no worries if not! (+ also your theme still says rqs are closed, but i saw you posted them being open two hrs ago :3)

pay attention to me!!

synopsis: how would bonten haruchiyo act w/ an excited & extroverted s/o?

☆ a/n ˎˊ˗ idk if yall can tell but ive never written for mr haru lawl ... also !! i added a little mini oneshot cause i couldn't help myself :3 thank you so much for requesting !! this was so cute to write !! i hope everyone enjoysss xoxo

☆ characters ˎˊ˗ sanzu (akashi) haurchiyo x g/n!reader

☆ wc ˎˊ˗ 2.7k+

masterlist

❥ sanzu thinks you’re annoying at first.

❥ he doesn’t notice at all when you first move into his apartment building; he doesn’t take much care in noticing small things like that if it didn’t relate to bonten. his work and mikey were the only important things to him, so when he hears excited squealing seeping through his walls one day, he thinks that his neighbor has a kid, (which quite frankly annoyed him, but he decided he didn’t care enough to do anything about it).

❥ there was no estimated time as to when he would get home--ranging anywhere from 6pm to 4am--so it takes at least a month or two for him to meet you officially. coincidentally, he had been going out to grab a drink from the convenience store when you were excitedly jumping around outside your door, a delivery package in your hands.

“oh! omg, are you sanzu-san?!” “...hah? who’re you?” “oh my gosh, i’ve been knocking on your door everyday for the past month, but you never seemed to be home! i never got to introduce myself to you! i’m (l/n) (y/n)! i moved in not that long ago, so i wanted to get to know my neighbors!” “‘kay. bye.”

❥ the only thing he wants to do is get away from you; he doesn’t want to be bothered with civilians, much less someone as annoying as you seemed to be. seriously, why were you talking so loud?!

❥ much to his displeasure, you followed him all the way to the convenience store, talking his ear off about the most meaningless things he’s ever heard of in his life, (how does somebody talking about nothing for so long?!) as he purchases his drinks and walks back to the apartment building. it takes everything in him not to snap at you; if he did, he would probably wake up all the neighbors from raising his voice, which wouldn’t be ideal since this was already his fifth apartment in the last six months.

❥ he’s unsure how you possibly couldn’t get a hint that he didn’t want to be bothered, especially after he only said a maximum of ten words to you in the whole thirty minutes you were following him around, (are you really that clueless? is this what loneliness does to people?). it does take him by surprise that you aren’t scared of him though; you’d shown absolutely no sign of apprehension despite the scars around his mouth, which he supposes shows a bit of good character from you. not that he really cares.

❥ he’s more than happy to shut the door on your face when he gets back to his apartment, finally indulging in the peace and quiet of his apartment, (he doesn’t think he’s ever been so happy to hear nothing). right when he’s opening his bottle of sake, he hears squealing through the walls. when you start monologuing about whatever you’d received in the mail, he just decides to quit and go to bed.

❥ sanzu isn’t sure how, but you have somehow made it your routine to follow him places whenever you ran into him. he also isn’t sure why he continuously allows you to tag along with him, but as long as it doesn’t affect his work, he doesn’t really care.

❥ you’re always talking about something; the weather, your coworker’s strange behavior the other day, or the stray cat you saw in the alleyway that ran away. there are times when he tunes out your talking and uses it as white noise, but you never seemed to get upset at the fact that he visibly is zoning out.

❥ after a while, he gets used to your constant presence around him, so much so that he finds it strange to not hear your excited yammering while he’s at work, (although he supposes he wouldn’t want to have that constantly in his ear while he’s doing ‘business’ with someone).

❥ the one thing that gets the attention of the rest of the bonten executives is when he suddenly stops going to the clubs, leaving whatever work he had there for during the day when it was barren. it was such a drastic change in behavior; sure, sanzu was never the type to be obsessed with the scantily dressed girls in the club, but he was known for taking some home every once in a while. at the very least, he was known for getting various types of substances from sketchy dealers who frequently attended. what’s even stranger to everyone is the fact that he slowly starts to engage in less substances, (though he still does every once in a while) which is what rings the alarm bells.

“oi, sanzu.” “what do you want, ran? i’m fuckin’ busy.” “well, it can wait. the fuck’s been up with you lately? you’ve been acting weird as shit.” “so?” “so, what the hell’s been up with you?” “none of your goddamn business, that’s what.” “woahh, easy there, man. seriously, somethin’ bothering you?” “i said it’s nothing, so drop it.”

❥ by the time he realizes what he’s been doing, it’s too late for him. you and your talkative self have wiggled their way into his heart, setting up camp to stay for a while. he had a glimpse of a thought of it when ran was confronting him, but he immediately pushed it out of his mind because how could that possibly be true?

❥ it can’t be true, even if he unwillingly likes to think about it now. he can’t let himself think about it; you were one of the most strange yet innocent and pure people he’s ever met, so how could he willingly taint you with someone like himself? no, he wouldn’t let it happen.

❥ and just like that, everything seems to be back to normal for him. he goes to the club even more than he did before, and the amount of substances he uses seems to increase exponentially by the week. he begins to sleep on the couch in his dingy office instead of going home so that he doesn’t run into you, only going home for the bare essentials every couple days, (and even then, he leaves after just a few minutes).

❥ it’s just his luck that he gets out of his car the moment you turn the corner onto the apartment building’s block, seeing him in plain sight as he freezes for a moment. and then he unfreezes because 1.) why is he of all people scared to run into you? he’s a bonten executive, he’s killed people before, so why was his heart beating so fast right now? and 2.) he needs to get away from there. right now.

˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗

“hey!! not so fast, haruchiyo!!” you shout, your steps hastening as you try to catch up with him. sanzu can hear your steps behind him, but his long legs give him the advantage as he quickly ducks into the apartment building, smashing the elevator button and tapping his foot as it decides to be as slow as it possibly can be.

he lets out a ‘tsk!’ sound when he notices you enter the building, promptly looking away from you and looking cooly at the blinker indicating what level the elevator was on, (can this thing move faster?!).

“stop ignoring me!! where have you been?!” you questioned, your voice a mix of worry and anger. “i’ve been knocking on your door everyday with no response!! i know you don’t particularly like me, but you’re the only person who doesn’t walk away from me, so could you at least give me a reason that you suddenly started avoiding me?!”

“...’m not avoiding you.” sanzu doesn’t know what to do right now; he’s never seen you angry like this before. typically, he would care less about the feelings of some random person like you, but for some reason the hurt in your voice makes him unusually unsure of himself.

you scoffed at his lame excuse, rolling your eyes.

“look! you’re trying to avoid me right now with elevator! seriously, can you just tell me what i did? i won’t do it again, i swear! just stop avoiding me!”

“fuck, it’s not you!” sanzu suddenly said, his voice strained. “i’m just busy, okay?! you’re better off being friends with someone else.”

“but you’re already my friend!! why don’t you want to keep talking to me??” sanzu ignored your words, his gaze staring straight ahead at the doors of the elevator, his stare so intense that you could almost think he was trying to open it telepathically. “hey!! can you just answer the damn question already, haruchiyo?!”

“why do you need to know so fuckin’ badly?! i just said i’m busy!!”

“because! i like you!” you yelled, your eyes seeming to get a bit watery. “and i know you don’t like me and that’s fine but i just want to be able to talk to you and see you sometimes, but now you’re always gone and i don’t know when you’re going to come back and it scares me! i just-”

sanzu cut off your words, promptly stepping in front of you and slipping his hand behind your head, slamming his lips into yours. he’s not even sure himself why he did something stupid like this, especially when the whole reason he was avoiding you was because of his own flaws, but he couldn’t help himself when he heard you being so cute and worried over him, (seriously, how was he supposed to resist something like that?).

it obviously took you off guard at first, but sanzu made sure you quickly realized what was going on, his mouth desperately pressing against yours. his kiss was rough but passionate, his lips moving quickly against yours as he pulled you closer to him, his other hand sliding around you to rest on the small of your back, (he’s doing it purely out of instinct; he hasn’t really thought about how he had been avoiding you for this very reason).

a small ding! from the elevator grabs your attention, making you push him off of you as someone comes out from the elevator, glancing at the two of you a bit suspiciously before walking out of the building, leaving both of you in silence.

“uh…wanna go to the convenience store for snacks…?”

˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗

❥ it took a little bit for sanzu to open up to you about anything even a little bit, but once he did, you were able to figure him out pretty quickly, especially when he’d finally decided to be truthful about his actual profession, (bro does not work an office 9-5). due to all of this, it’s easy to tell that sanzu has a lot of issues, but it wasn’t something that you weren’t willing to work through with him!

❥ the two of you are the definition of black cat and golden retriever! you are always excited about everything and are taking him to all the cool and trendy places on dates while he is more quiet, keeping close to your side and watching everything with a careful eye, (especially people he defines as creeps, i.e. people who look at you for more than 0.2 seconds).

❥ date wise, he is usually following your lead. he doesn’t have the slightest clue about what you think it romantic, so it will usually be you planning outings for the two of you. a lot of times he will complain about being tired and not wanting to go out, but don’t worry, he’s completely lying; he just thinks it’s cute when you whine and pull his arm asking him to come out with you.

❥ despite the fact that he is not the most romantic guy, he does a lot of romantic things without realizing. he enjoys sending you your favorite flowers when you’re at work or staying at home while he’s at work, sending cute little notes along with them, (well, you think they are pretty cute).

i think you like these ones. -h be ready by seven. wear something you feel good in. -h sorry i didn’t buy milk. there’s frozen waffles in the freezer. -h

❥ sanzu does a lot of those little things for you too; opening doors for you, pulling chairs out for you, taking things out of your hands when you’re carrying a lot, etc. it doesn’t seem like he’s the type to do things like this, but it’s because he isn’t the type to do it. he only does it for you, and he himself doesn’t even know why he does these things, (he’s head over heels in love with you, but in no universe will he ever actually admit that).

❥ the most protective over you, and a little possessive too. he doesn’t control everything that you do, but he likes to have a clear-cut plan of everything you do on a normal day so that his mind is put at ease, (also so he can known when something is wrong). he won’t tell you this, but he has someone assigned to keeping an eye on your as you go about your day because he’s extremely paranoid that somebody from an opposing gang will try and come after you. he would prefer if he could by your side himself, but it’s the next best option, (he still sends frequent texts and calls you throughout the day to make sure everything is well).

❥ the possessive part of him comes out more when he thinks people are hitting on you, (they really are just being nice; he’s just a little bit crazy…he loves you though!!). he doesn’t hesitate to slide his long arms all around you, letting you continue talking while he makes a deadly eye contact with the person, his face twisted in mild disgust as if he were looking down at a cockroach, (he’s mastered this expression somehow). he knows that you enjoy talking with people so he won’t keep you from doing so, but in the process he will make sure that everybody knows you’re his.

❥ sanzu’s not the most affectionate person there is, but he is affectionate when he wants to be. there are times when he’ll come home and not say a word, just wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his head in the crook of your neck, mumbling something about having a terrible day. really, he just becomes a big baby when he’s like that, laying his lanky limbs all over you and claiming that he’s ‘recharging’.

❥ it’s hard to label sanzu as an extrovert/introvert, since it can really depend on what mood he’s in and the situation. he’s more of an introvert in public settings with other people, (he doesn’t know how to interact nicely with people he doesn’t know) but when he’s with a majority of people he knows, he turns into more of an extrovert which matches with your energy quite nicely.

❥ unintentionally, there comes a time when you accidentally get to meet the rest of his coworkers. it happened when they were dropping him back off at home after a night at the club and you’d had to come get him from the car because of how inebriated he was.

“woah, you’re (y/n), huh?” “oh, yes! it’s nice to meet you! you all must work with haru, right? please continue to take good care of him! would you like to come inside for a snack or some water?” “...dude, what the fuck.” “how the hell did he bag someone like that?!”

❥ safe to say, they are all extremely shocked, (they never would have thought that someone like sanzu would be dating someone as sweet and talkative as you). the next day when he gets into work, he’s immediately hounded with all types of questions surrounding you and how the two of you started to date.

“holy shit, is that why you were acting crazy a few months ago?!” “i wasn’t acting fuckin’ crazy?!” “sanzu, you’re the craziest person here, and you started acting normal!! that was crazy!!”

❥ after that, he makes sure that his associates never get to see you again, (“hey, bring your pretty lil thing around sometime!”, “i would rather kill you right now.”).

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lixern · 10 months

Text

ONE ON THE BACK- NOTHA' ONE ON THE FRONT!

` think i need someone older . . . jingren x gn!reader <-

xx. tags; poly┊jing yuan┊blade┊jingren┊all of u are in an rs┊blade punishes u┊threesome┊oral┊edging┊overstimulation┊degradation┊praise┊full nelson┊rough sex┊hints of double penetration┊begging┊orgasm denial┊getting caught┊exhibitionism┊multiple orgasm┊cunnilingus┊pet names (mostly just darling or something)┊pussy drunk bladie and yuan┊they cant get enough of u!! dealer's note; this was written a month ago or maybee more before being posted, and yes this was SPECIFICALLY something ive been looking for, FOR A LONGM LONG TIME AGO!!!! i didnt find it ofc, so why not just write it myself :3 anyway, to that one anon who sent a platonic jing yuan work request ill do it soon if i got an idea on how to write it AYUBUASBUASDUBAD also love u guys omg my accounts growing fast :((

Who knows how you got into this position.. oh! You know.

You really just had to tease Blade during his important duties.. God, he was so frustrated. Your pretty face- pretty self, it made him insane. You just wanted to get into trouble huh? You know what you did, you really did know. He dragged you into your shared home afterwards, immediately ripping off those clothes you wore. It's okay, Jing Yuan could buy another set of outfits for you.

Blade got you all riled up and wet, but he never let you cum. You were so tired.. fingered, stretched out. His fingers scissored your insides to loosen you up for his giant cock. And when you were all messed up, crying for him, he finally let you.

Not before you say "Please" and take his cock though, he needs you all messed up first.

Unfortunately, (or fortunately, hm?) you came, just as you saw the sight of Jing Yuan entering the room. He looked so unfazed, so unbothered as he walked up to you and Blade.

"Jing Yuan, you're home early."

Blade spoke, spreading your legs wider for him as you had your back to his chest- sitting ontop of him.

"A lovely welcome, Blade."

Jing Yuan replied, walking over to you with a gentle.. mischievous smile. You and Blade were at the edge of the bed, giving Jing Yuan easy access to your greedy sex.

He flicked a finger on it, sweetly dragging it across your sensitive spot. But you just came! You were so sensitive.

You were too fucked out to notice what Blade was doing, till he laid down- dragging you with him.

"Jing Yuan, aren't they so welcoming?"

He asked Blade, slowly moving his hands down to your waist. Full nelson, such a vulnerable position for the both of you. Your legs spread even more, as Jing Yuan opened them.

You gasped as you felt Blade move again, his thrusts unforgiving. It felt so good.. but then Jing Yuan started to suckle on your throbbing little spot.

"Mmghn- J-Jing Yuan! S'too s-sensitive.. anghuuugh~~! S-Sho' good! D-Don't stooppnmhn!"

You moaned out, but Blade seemed to be speeding up his thrusts. He used a hand to caress your face, making you look at him, even though your vision was cloudy, and you couldn't look at him fully.

"Come on, don't you think you can get my name out of your mouth too? Ah, Jing Yuan, this is a punishment for them, they were a bit naughty during my work phase."

Blade spoke to the both of you, bucking his hips up harder.

"B-Blade! pleaseeenghuhnmnh!"

You moaned, asking for release. Jing Yuan then started sucking even more sloppily- he used his hands to gently part your legs even farther.

It was a heavenly mix of rough and gentle, you couldn't ask for more.

Yet- both of them had the power to make you ask for even more.

"N-Need to c-cumgnhn! P-Please! H-Haven't I been so g-goodmngh~?"

You begged them, yet they were so stern. Atleast Blade was, unlike Jing Yuan.

"Blade, don't you think we should let our little darling cum?"

Jing Yuan asked, trying to persuade Blade. He then licked a fat stripe up your sex, that sweet little spot that greedily throbbed for their attention.

"Hm.. I supposed they were good."

Blade said, before suddenly pulling out. Why? You thought, but then-

He slammed it back in with force, so hard. He continued slamming it back in and out, pulling it out all the way before thrusting it deep inside.

Jing Yuan on the other hand got the hint, suddenly speeding up his sucks and licks, he kneaded your thighs with his hands, trying to stimulate you even further. You looked at Jing Yuan, seeing him looking at you with a gentle smile, which didn't match his speed right now at all. Blade on the other hand, you could feel him smirking- licking your neck and biting.

"C-Close- mhaaangh!~ L-Love you two s-so much!"

The feeling was too much- and they both went so feral after the "I love you" you spat out at them. Moaning loudly as you came, you felt Blade's thrusts slow and Jing Yuan's mouth retract itself from you.

"Hahhng...."

You breath out, before gasping as you felt Blade move suddenly again. You look at Jing Yuan, silently pleading hm to stop- but not really, it felt all too good. But then you notice Jing Yuan take off his pants too..

"Ready to take both of us, darling?"

Jing Yuan said. God, you would be sore as fuck in the morning.

#hsr x you #hsr x reader #honkai star rail #hsr #hsr jing yuan #hsr blade #jing yuan hsr #blade hsr #jingren #jing yuan x reader #jing yuan x y/n #jing yuan x you #jing yuan x blade #blade x reader #blade x y/n #blade x you #jing yuan x reader smut #blade x reader smut #smut

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bigboysfalldeep · 1 year

Text

life guard - posession

I always wanted to be someone else, and this became reality when I met my now-mentor Jake. We met in high school, and that was when he taught me how to let go of my body, leave it, and move through the air. Light as a feather, I can move freely, and most importantly, I can look for another, better body. For over 2 years now, Ive been taking over many different men, some for a month, some for just a couple of days or hours, always looking for the next ride.

I am minding my own business when I enter a public swimming pool. There are so many potential bodies: hot guys, thick guys, pretty guys. All of them are suitable candidates. But do not come close to the lifeguard. if I ever saw one. His hair was messy on purpose, his muscles were oily, and his red shorts flattered his perfect ass. He sits there, on guard, while I hover next to him, my face inches away from his.

What a beautiful man he is. I feel myself growing tenser with every second going by, and all of me wants to take him, wear him, and be him. I place a hand softly against his chest, feeling his beating heart. I could take him right here, but it tends to take a few minutes, and I don't want him to get hurt. So I wait patiently. Wait for him to go somewhere more secluded. Just then, another lifeguard enters the swimming area: a girl waving. My man smiles and waves back. "Veronica. Youre early." He says his voice is so smooth, deep, and soothing. I would have creamed my pants right here; luckily, as a ghost-like figure, my dick gets hard, but I won't expose myself. They exchange a quick talk until he leaves her, heading to the locker room. I follow him closely and enter the room behind him. He walks towards a huge mirror, admiring himself, his muscles, his face, and all that. I make sure no one is in here before I take the first step.

I approach him from behind, placing both of my hands on his shoulders. This time, he can feel something as a quick shiver runs down his spine. I can see his eyes looking above his shoulder through the mirror, but he can't see me. One hand firmly at his shoulder, I run the other down, following his spine, as if unzipping a costume, a suit. His whole body gets stiffer and more rigid as he lets out a soft, low groan.

I keep eye contact with him through the mirror, and as he closes his eyes for just a second, his mind is already getting a little overwhelmed. Good. He's a suitable pick. Some people are way too resilient, yet he seems willing and open for me. Now comes the fun part. Slowly, carefully, I move inside him. I am sliding inside his body, arms first, as if putting on a coat. It feels so good and sensational.

I hold back a deep moan, but he lets go for a second before catching himself when a grunt escapes his lips. My fingers barely reach his fingertips, and that's a problem. He's bigger than me, so I have two options. Enlarge myself or let his skin approach me. As I think, he starts to stroke his chest with both hands, firmly and lovingly. He doesn't know what's happening yet; all he feels are waves of pure pleasure running through his arms, and I feel the same. Instinctively, I tell my form to grow bigger, and surely, but slowly, I get bulkier. His arms grow larger with his biceps, and all of his muscles bulge heavily.

He opens his mouth, letting out a breathless moan. So hot. I get more and more excited, and with a huge smirk, I step inside him, my legs instantly adjusting to his form. Again, I feel his muscles react to me invading his space as they grow hard, bulging harshly. "What....s...happening tooo...me..er." He stutters and grabs his erect cock through his shorts. Part of me is already moving him as my fingers wrap around his hard cock. It feels good to have his huge cock twitching in my hand.

With a hard thrust, I move my hips into his, like fucking his virgin hole. His body thrusts as well, and I need to steady him against the cold wall right next to the mirror. His dick pulsates now quickly, just like his heart is racing so fast. It's always a risk to take over someone's body; it's a lot of pain and pleasure, and not everyone can handle it. However, his well-trained, well-formed body should be able to keep up.

He closes his eyes, and his head sinks as well. Desperately trying to regain his composure, he is fighting back. This, however, is my game, and I'm going to take him. Now it's going to get hard. Slowly, I move my head into his as I feel his mind and his thoughts intertwine with mine. He's scared, confused, yet aroused and excited. I can tell he's into this, perhaps on another level, but he doesn't even flinch. Slowly but steadily, I take over his body. At first, I started to move my hands, stroking my firm chest, my hard nipples, and my toned abs. "What are you?" He thinks, aware of my presence. But I'm not here for a chat. I take a firm stand and feel his legs obey me instantly. "Soo goood." We moan in unison, his voice being my voice. It cracks slightly, yet it is still so smooth.

He enjoys this as much as I do, even begging for more. I assume he isn't fully aware of what I'm up to, but I will make him enjoy this. I rub my hand against his throbbing cock firmly and teasingly, and we moan again and again as it starts to leak, staining our briefs. "Fuuuuck." Fantastic. We start to grind against our hands, the whole body tensing more and more. Our hearts accelerate, our muscles grow even bigger, and our pulsating cock is now imprinting through our tight shorts.

As my mind starts to overlay his, I can feel him panicking. "Whatt?" He says, one hand steadying ourselves against the wall, the other now tightly around our cock. That's the most amazing feeling. His mind becomes mine, and his thoughts slowly disappear as he grows weaker. We start to drool heavily, our eyes unfocused and partly rolled back into our skulls.

Swaying slightly, I take more and more control of him and of my new body. His fingers, hands, and arms become mine. His muscles nearly tear apart as they adjust to me even more. I grow bigger, and his skin now covers my form perfectly. His chest, stomach, and thighs adjust quickly as well, and as I start to thrust again, my hand jerks him off quickly and firmly. His legs are now mine, and I stop swaying instantly. As all of him adjusted to me, I let out a long, deep groan. The first time I came as him right into the wet briefs and shorts. One load after another, I let go of him, his mind already hidden deep inside my brain.

I open my eyes, seeing my new, beautiful body in my reflection. Smirking, I take a step closer, one hand still at my wet crotch, the other now tracing my firm jawline. "Good one. I must admit." I use his beautiful voice and enjoy his light stubble tickling my fingertips. Running a hand through his hair, I move the other up and down his cock again, which is the best feeling. I start to stroke myself, my chest, and my stomach again while touching my wet dick through the shorts. "This will be fun." I growl and slip out of my pants. Now naked, I inspect his body some more—his large cock, big thighs, and the hairy treasure trail. My body shudders, making me giggle. I catch my gaze inside the mirror, and his eyes are now shining brightly, green, just like mine did. Licking my lips, I walk through the room towards his locker. Having access to his memories, I unlock them and get dressed. To cover my eyes for now, I put on sunglasses before returning to the pools and starting a new chapter in life.

#male on male #tf story #male domination #male transformation #tf male #male possession #male meat suit #male body possession

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sukiipjs · 3 months

Text

✮ BLONDIE : PT 1

°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

↳ nick sturniolo x masc reader

↳ words - 2239

↳ summary - you’ve been having a hard time realizing and accepting the fact that you’re gay, and in love with your best friend. you try to ignore the feelings but that only makes everything worse until you can’t hide it anymore.

↳ contains - swearing, angst, use of y/n, internalized homophobia, depression, crying, idk??? [READ PT 2 - PT 3]

↳ song - blondie by current joys

°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

nick has been my best friend for years, he’s always been there for me, and me there for him. we met in the first grade when he saw me alone at recess on the swings and he ran up to me, asking if i wanted to play with him and his brothers. one of the many things i love about him, hes always there, always there to help, or just be with. from that day on he’s always been my number one but honestly, i’ve been kind of avoiding him lately.

of course i don’t want to, i really really don’t want to, trust me, but i don’t want to make anything bad between us either. even though pushing him away is probably fucking things up anyway.

the thing is, for months, maybe even years now i think that i might be coming to a realization: i think i’m gay, or not gay but bi? i hate labels, i dont want to be put into a box, its honestly just hard to fit into one too. i mean i’ve had girlfriends before and i’ve liked that, but nick…

okay i might be coming to another realization: i think i’m in love with nick. and to make everything worse, i can’t even talk to anyone about this because the only person i would tell is nick, but if i told him, well i just cant, it could destroy our friendship. he’d hate me, i cant lose him.

but maybe i’m not in love with him, i mean i love nick, i always have but maybe its not love love? maybe its just me appreciating our friendship more. okay who am i kidding it’s definitely becoming more, I LOVE HIM. he’s just perfect, in general, to me, to everyone. i want to spend every moment of my life with him, i want to hug him and never let him go, i want to be with him, i just want to see him again.

i can’t even imagine what he’d say if he knew i liked him. he’d probably be disgusted, i’d ruin our friendship forever. i cant do that, i can’t risk anything like that, i need him even if that means the best thing i can do is just stay away, make up lies of why i cant hang out, slowly stop texting him, i mean maybe it's not the best thing but its either i do this and try and force these feelings down or i tell him and ruin everything. this is better, or at least that’s what i keep telling myself.

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

nick 🫶

| wanna hang out today? haven’t seen you in forever, i’m boredddd

| i know i’m sorry, but i cant today, really really sorry. still not feeling good

| that’s okay, hope you feel better though 💕 if you need anything tell me okay?

| i’d rather hang out with you and get sick then spend one more second with my idiot brothers over here 💀

i stare at the message on my screen, i’m not sick, i’m just trying to be a good friend… by avoiding my best friend… sure, whatever.

i slam down my phone on my mattress, rolling over and burying my face in my pillow. muffled screams from my mouth as tears, start to pour from my eyes. every time i message him, saying i cant hang out i immediately regret it. i want to see him, i always do but again, i cant, i fucking cant. it would only make my feelings stronger and i just need to get rid of them as soon as i can so things can just go back to how they were.

fuck, here comes the spiral that ive been replaying in my head forever. do i even really like him? am i really bi, gay, straight, whatever the fuck? i don’t even know, it’s all too confusing and stressful right now. why can’t i just be me? and have my best friend with me again? actually hang out with him, see him?

all i can really do right now is continue screaming and crying into my pillow about how much of a shitty friend i’m being, great. I constantly stalk his instagram, trying to see if i do really like him and try to see what he’s up to without me, i miss him so much.

…i wish he was a girl then i would be straight and all this shit wouldn’t hurt so much. i’m not trying to say that being gay is bad, all i’m saying is that it would be easier to figure all this out if i was straight and he was a girl. i know that’s so messed up to say but i don’t know how else to put it.

if he was a girl, i’d know that i’m in love with him, i wouldn’t be so afraid to accept myself because there wouldn’t be anything to accept. i’d just be me and he’d she’d be him her, i’d get to be his her boyfriend and we’d be a happy couple. i’d be happy and i wouldn’t have to push the person i love most in this stupid world away…

i smash my face into my silky white pillowcase over and over, shaking my head as i force the sides of the pillow into my face more. i want to suffocate.

i scream into my pillow more and more. ‘i love you nick, i love you nick, i love you. i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you… but i do, i really really do, but i cant… i really really fucking cant.’

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

i stay rotting in my bed, spiraling about random shit, taking random quizzes of ‘am i gay?’ or ‘am i in love with my bestfriend?’ or ‘is it a crush?’ like i know.

soft blankets cover me, my silky pillows supporting my back as i rewatch rupaul's drag race on my computer until i finish it again, oreos and empty dr pepper cans surround me. and of course, nick always in my mind, everything reminding me of him, those stupid quizzes, his favorite show, his favorite drink. i wish he could be here, like how we used to hang out before i started ruining everything but i could be ruining it more, at least im keeping my mouth shut.

every once and a while, a message from nick pops up. him sending me a tiktok or telling me about how spacecamp is going or just something random, asking how im doing, if im still sick. most times i try to ignore him, turning off the notifications but i answer sometimes, only one or two words, maybe just an emoji, just trying to say something. i don’t want him to think i hate him or anything, i still of course love him.

the only time i ever get up from my bed is to go the the bathroom or get more food, ive been wearing the same two sweatpants alternating them and random shirts that i throw on the floor after i wear them for enough. my hair shaggy and a scratchy stubble on my face. i look and feel gross. i didnt think that forcing my best friend away and trying to figure out my sexuality could make me this depressed, who knew.

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

weeks pass of me ignoring (or at least trying to ignore) nick and weeks of screaming into my sheets and sleeping all day become more and more. i finally decide to leave my apartment and stock up on some random things that will help me rot in my room even more: coffee, chips, oreos, whatever else i might want.

as i scan the aisle for dr pepper, standing in my gray hoodie with the hood covering me and one of the two sweatpants i’ve been wearing on, i hear a voice at the end of the row calling to me, “y/n?” my head turns to see who knows me that’s here, about to see how disgusting i look and just my luck, it’s nick.

“nick” a bright smile floods my face, i haven’t seen him for what seems like forever, i look at his blonde hair with grown out brunette roots, plus that signature nose ring and star earrings, of course he looks great.

he runs up to me, giving me a warm hug as he smiles too, “oh my god i haven’t seen you in decadessss” he exaggerates, laughing at me, “you feeling better now?” i tilt my head a little, confused but then i remember my lie. “oh yeah, i am. even though i dont look it” i try to scoff a laugh, looking down at myself, excusing how ‘i dont care’ i look right now.

“you look fine.” he laughs back again, “you know… me, chris and matt were gonna go out for dinner soon, wanna come?” i can tell he really wants me to be there and i really want to but i try to push it away, still.

“uhhh, i think had something later, sorry” my small smile slowly fading as his does too, i don’t think i’ve seen his smile leave that fast. “really? we haven’t talked in weeks, i miss you” he jokes a little, but really we do miss each other.

“i know, i’m sorry, but i promise we’ll hang out soon yeah?” i try to fake a small smile, trying to make this a little better but nick still looks sad, “yeah okay, see you later then?” he looks like he hates me, he looks just annoyed, hurt. i feel terrible.

“yeah, later” i’m about to walk closer to give him another hug but he leaves, to i assume go find his brothers, before i can. i’m terrible.

i finish up grabbing my things before leaving and driving off, replaying our interaction in my head. i could’ve just went? it was one dinner, that’s all. not a big deal. but it’s too late, it would just be weird if my schedule suddenly cleared up now.

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

i make my way back to my apartment, putting my bags down on the counter before going straight to my room again, flopping down on top of the pile of blankets and stuffed animals that cover my bed.

i dig in my pocket for my phone, taking it out as i grab a blanket to pull it over my face, closing off the sun that shines through my window.

i go straight to me and nicks messages, thinking of texting him. ‘i’m sorry’ too short, plain. ‘sorry, i was wrong i can go’ feels like i’m pitying him, plus just dumb. ‘i love you’ yeah definitely not. ‘come over? sorry’ again, stupid and he can NOT see the mess i have over here.

i decide on nothing and put my phone to the side of me, burying my head into my pillows again, tears flooding my eyes again again again. it’s too much. this is all stupid and i need to get over it all. this is terrible.

i go back to my cycle of curling up in warm blankets, eating my now new oreos and dr pepper and rewatching shows i’ve seen a million times before. and obviously stalking nicks instagram, he posted a story of him and his brothers at dinner. he’s still wearing those earrings and that same beige jacket he was wearing before, and he still looks great.

i swipe up, about to message him. ‘you look great, sorry i couldn’t come’ i quickly delete it and just like the story. i need to stop trying to message him when i’m trying to ignore him.

₊ ° .☆ °:. *₊

after falling asleep shortly after i finished looking at nicks story i wake up to like five texts from who? nick, of course.

nick 🫶

| are you ignoring me?

| like did i do something or what?

| are you okay?

| can we just talk or hang out please?

| y/n?

| okay sorry actually, never mind

my heart drops, i feel so TERRIBLE. nick did nothing and i never want him to think that he did something wrong. he’s perfect.

i pick up my phone to respond but honesty i don’t know if i should… i want him to know that he did nothing but he’s right about me ignoring him… fuck this. i just ignore him, still.

i shut off my phone fast and roll to my other side, curling up my legs and staring at the small textured bumps on the off-white wall that i face. i take in every detail, trying to distract myself with something else. i spot all the tiny discolorations or stains on the wall, the way it all starts to blur when tears, again, rain out my eyes.

they drip on the curves of my cheeks and lips, my hands are tucked under my legs as he tears drop onto my sheets, i don’t bother wiping them off. they make a small circle ish shape when it hits on my bed with a darker gray on my gray sheets.

my spiraling hits again when the ridges on my wall go dark as my eyes close. why can’t my best friend just be my best friend? why can’t i just be a normal person? why can’t i just forget it all? why can’t this all just go away? why? why? why? why?

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

taglist : @slutforchriss @mattsleftnipple03 @mattsdinosweater @ccolleenn @mixvchelle @leah-loves-lilies @sturn-wrld @redz0nez9 @cheriematt @freshloveforthefit @nickuniversity @whore4matt @txssvx @will-yummy

#chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo smut #nicolas sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #sturniolo #𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆#sukiipjs #𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆

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teyammybeloved · 7 months

Note

heyyy I saw your fanfic about the mental health and depression things and I would loveeee if you would write one about the reader self harming and Miguel finds out and comforts them🧡 I’ve struggled with self harm and depression and your fics help so much!

JUST HOLD ON

miguel o’hara

summary; miguel’s heart breaks when he finds out what you do to yourself

warnings; mentions of self harm, comfort, swearing, could be very poorly written and im so so so sorry if it is xx

an; thank you for requesting, i want to remind everyone that i am in NO WAY romanticising self harm or mental health problems, i wanted to make this series to help people who dont have somewhere to go or someone to talk to, these are purely just comfort fics

i also want to say, youre not alone, and i know self harm is a coping mechanism for many, myself included, but there is so many other healthy ways to cope and i want everyone to know that if you ever ever ever need anybody to talk to, im always here and i want to do my best to make sure youre all okay.

long sleeves, jumpers, scafs, bandaids, bracelets. you were always wearing one or the other. miguel never asked why, he thought maybe you just found it more comfortable.

the entire time you and miguel had been dating, and in a relationship, it had been the cold seasons of the year, and now with summer coming in quick, you were stressing.

miguel isn’t stupid, he would wonder why you’re wearing a jumper or a long sleeve in ridiculous heat, he would question it, and that set you off in a panic.

it was fine, during the day when miguel was at the HQ doing his spider business, but when he got home, your mind went crazy.

although, to you, you did a good job hiding it.

“im home!” miguel says, your eyes widen as you get off the couch quickly, “one sec!” you reply, running up to your bedroom to get a jumper, quickly throwing on the first one you can find, you go back to meet miguel.

you wrap your arms around him, he does the same, squeezing you tightly. “how was your day?” you ask, as you let go of him, walking to the kitchen to start with dinner.

“not bad.. newbies are always rough” miguel says softly, leaning against the wall in the kitchen. “baby” he says softly.

you hum in response, occupied by cutting vegetables. “why do you have the AC on, while wearing a jumper?” he wasn’t mad, he was genuinely just wondering.

regardless you freak, trying to come up with an explanation, “my top half was cold” you say, shrugging.

miguel laughs, “do you need some help?” he says, leaning off of the wall to come up next to you,

“yes, boil some water”

miguel wasn’t stupid. he knew you better then he knew himself, and he knew your top half was always hotter then your bottom half, you were always wearing pants and rubbing your sleeves over your legs.

so he was confused.

it had been like this for a while now, little things would concern miguel but he didn’t want to bring them up, incase they were nothing.

today was weird though, while you were still asleep, in bed, miguel had to get ready for the day, looking in the laundry for a pair of socks, he finds one of your tshirts.

he ignored it at first, before he saw the red stains along the sleeves, his mind first went to, ‘that time of the month’ but you don’t get that in your arm.

he frowns, confused. deciding to figure it out later.

“lyla, do you know whats up with y/n” he asks softly, trying to stay focused on his work, but concern filled his body.

“what do you mean” she asks back, miguel sighs. “tell a soul, and i will literally end your existence” he says, “okok! just say it”

“i don’t think ive ever seen y/n’s arms”

“you think she doesn’t have arms?”

“no- shut up. like shes always wearing long sleeves, or jumpers, or her wrists are covered in bracelets.”

“oh miguel” lyla frowns. “what- what does that mean”

“obviously i cant be 100% sure, i don’t know personally, but it very much could be her trying to hide something..” she says.

“what?” miguel asks, shaking his head “hide what?”

“this isn’t my place to tell, just talk to her”

when miguel came home that evening, he was even more confused and concerned then he was when he left in the morning. he called out, but didn’t get a response, he hums.

he finds you in the living room, asleep on the couch, he smiles softly before he notices your arm.

no long sleeve, no jumper, no bracelets.

his eyes widen as he looks at the blood stains on your arm, the tissue in your other hand, covered in blood. if it was just one miguel would just assume it was an accident.

but he sees it, all of it, the numerous scas, fresh and old cuts, he can feel his stomach drop. next to the paper he finds a small razor, he picks it up quickly, throwing it out before he comes back, taking a deep breath.

“y/n” he says softly, you were a light sleeper, “mm?” you reply, until something must of clicked in your brain.

you sit up quickly, pulling you arm to your chest, youre pale like you have seen a ghost, miguel is heartbroken.

“come with me” he says softly, you pause for a minute as he starts walking, but when he turns around to you, you stand up and follow him.

into your bedroom, he tells you to sit on the bed, before he goes into the bathroom for a moment. “miguel- im sorry” you finally say.

he doesn’t reply, coming out with a first aid kit, kneeling on the ground in front of you. wiping your arm, so damn gently.

he continues to clean and bandage your arm, without saying anything before he sits next to you on the bed.

you have tears in your ears, and a yuck feeling in your stomach, “come here” miguel says, lifting you onto his lap, facing him, he wraps his arms around you.

“im sorry, miggy”

“don’t apologise baby, you don’t have to feel bad about this okay? you have done nothing wrong”

“i-“

“i want you to know, im here, im going to be here regardless of what happens, okay? this isn’t healthy, baby. but i know its a coping mechanism for you, we just gotta find a healthier one, together yeah?”

“yeah” you say softly, buried in his neck.

“i hate knowing you’ve been hurting yourself baby, someone is hurting my special girl, and i had no idea” he says, looking at you as he moves your hair behind your ear.

you frown, as you look up at him. “no more” you say.

“no more” he agrees.

“i want you to promise me, that if you need me or ever think about doing it again, you will get me straight away, i don’t care whats happening or what im doing, youre my priority, always”

“i love you miggy, i promise”

“i love you too, cmon, lets get you changed then watch allll the rom coms you want” he says, kissing your face.

#miguel x you #spiderverse miguel #miguel x y/n #miguel ohara #miguel spiderverse #miguel x reader #miguel 2099 #atsv miguel #miguel o’hara fluff #miguel o’hara x y/n #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara x you #miguel o’hara fanfiction #miguel spiderman #miguel o'hara #miguel smut #mental health awareness

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hannieehaee · 3 months

Note

i dont know if u accept smut reqs but if u don’t please ignore my ask and i’m so sorry for overstepping!!

but could i please req a hard dom!seungkwan who teaches u a lesson at home after u couldn’t stop whining and begging for him at dinner with ur friends?

18+ / mdi

content: dom!seungkwan, afab reader, teasing, smut, oral (m receiving), letc.

wc: 1399

a/n: im so sorry i took so long to finish this!!! ive been trying to make time for all reqs so its taking a while to get them all out T-T anyways thank u for requesting and i hope u enjoy!!

masterlist

it was common for seungkwan to bring you along whenever he had dinner with the members. it had kind of become a tradition to have dinner together at least once a month, with the members' respective significant others tagging along.

you had been part of the crew for a while, having been dating seungkwan for an extended period of time by now. you were practically just another friend to the members at this point, making all of you quite comfortable with one another.

maybe too comfortable.

seungkwan always thought of you as a well-behaved girl. not even in a dirty way or anything. he just knew you were never the type to act out in public or to purposely become a nuance to him. yes, you would banter with him sometimes, but it was always in good faith and never really went anywhere. sure, you'd often tease him in the bedroom and take advantage of your effect on him time after time, but this always remained behind closed doors.

which was why seungkwan was quite shocked at the way in which you had suddenly decided to behave.

you weren't being too obvious about it, keeping your brattiness between you and himself. it started with a few touches far too high on his thigh, followed by raunchy comments hidden behind a cough. then it evolved into lustful eyes staring down on his own whenever no one was looking.

it even manifested itself into you cornering him on your way to the bathroom as he came back from a bathroom break himself.

you'd planted a steamy kiss on his lips and felt him up in a very unseemly way before letting him know you 'wanted his cock so fucking bad' and making your merry way to the bathroom as he walked back to the table completely flustered. it then (unsurprisingly) proceeded into a text message received by seungkwan a few moments later, a message containing your bare breasts and a look in your eye that he only ever saw between the sheets. except you weren't between his sheets. you were at the restaurant's bathroom, making a fool of him with a mere picture.

that was more or less where seungkwan felt it'd be appropriate to put his foot down. he was never good at resisting you, and he knew that adding the extra layer of being surrounded by his members would only make him break sooner or later. so he decided to throw you a curveball and storm after you in the bathroom, coughing out an excuse of 'forgot my wallet in the restroom' to the other guys before sneaking his way into the hallway leading to the restroom. that's where he found you making your way back to the table before wordlessly dragging you to one of the spacious gender neutral stalls and locking the door.

immediately pushing you up against the wall, he practically growled out his next words.

"you wanted me to embarrass myself out there, huh? knowing i dont know how to act any time you tease me," he assessed, knowing he was right by your shocked expression.

you clearly were expecting him to crumble and make up some weak excuse in order to take you home as you smirked next to him, giving the members clear indication of who begged for who in the relationship. but he decided to turn things on you and give you a taste of your own medicine, maybe show you what it was like to get on your knees for your beloved.

"no, i-"

"did i say you could speak? good girls stay quiet til i tell them do speak. do you understand?", his hands went to run up and down your body, making a game plan of how he was going to take you.

"y-yes."

"good girl. now ..."

his eyed drifted down to your cleavage, reminding him of the dirty picture you had sent him earlier.

without a second thought, his hands grabbed onto your cleavage and forcefully pulled it down, ripping a bit at the arms of your dress before diving right to your tits, mouth open and willing.

"k-kwannie, what are you-"

he ignored your gasp, simply adding more force to the suckling of your breasts, using his arms to push up your hips against his own as he began to grind against you. his groans and your gasps were the only thing that could be heard in the empty restroom.

after getting his fill of your tits in his mouth, he became too frustrated by the mere friction he felt at the grinding of your hips, opting instead to guide you into a kneeling position in front of him.

"you're gonna be a good girl and take care of the problem you caused, right, baby?", he looked down at you with indescribable lust in his gaze.

"yes, kwannie ... want it in my mouth so bad," you begged, licking at him through his pants while you gave him the prettiest eyes he'd ever seen.

in any other occasion, this would've had him on his knees, begging for your mouth around his dick and crying as he felt the barest touch, but today he had to prove a point.

"stop messing around and get my cock out. don't make me repeat myself," he didn't recognize himself as he ordered you around, but he liked the shudder he saw go through you at his demanding tone.

without complaint, you hurriedly undid his pants and brought his boxers down, immediately getting to work as you licked and kissed at his tip.

he threw his head back at your teasing, unable to reprimand you for it. it just felt so fucking good.

luckily for both you and him, this didn't last long. before even realizing it, you were already gagging on as much of his cock as you could get into your mouth, looking up at him with furrowed brows as you wordlessly begged him. he was confused as to what you were begging for at first, only realizing what you meant when you brought his hands behind your head, slightly making him push your head forward and- oh.

was this what you wanted? was this what you'd been after all along?

you wanted him to take control and use you for his pleasure. fuck.

he almost came at the realization, until realizing that he'd much rather cum after fucking your mouth until you cried.

he began pistoling his hips against your mouth, moaning as you let yourself become his pretty fleshlight while he groaned at both the sight and feeling. maybe you weren't a bad behaved girl after all. maybe all you wanted was him to take his frustrations out on you and use you like the pretty doll you were.

or at least he hoped this was the case, because he was already addicted.

"pretty thing ... oh, fuck. such a pretty thing for me to use, aren't you? gonna cum in your mouth, okay? gonna fill you up and you're gonna swallow it all for me, yeah?", he mumbled between moans, knowing his end would come faster than expected.

and he was right. his orgasm took over just moments later, with his hands dragging your head up and down his cock while his hips thrust into your awaiting mouth. he completely lost himself as his orgasm washed over him, making him lose all sense of his surroundings and almost disregard your gagging as he filled your mouth.

he pulled away moments after, crying out in painful pleasure when you still managed to suckle on his sensitive tip as he pulled himself out of your mouth.

he let himself fall down against the wall, now sitting at your level as he tried to catch his breath.

"i hate you," he groaned between breaths.

"yeah. i believe that. you just fucked my mouth like you wanted me dead," you chuckled as you also attempted to regulate your breathing.

"wasn't that what you wanted?", he quirked an eyebrow at you.

"maybe."

"you menace," he chuckled despite his words.

"you like it," you got close enough to him to land a sweet peck on his lips.

"i wont when we have to go out there and explain what we were doing this whole time."

"i got my fill of cock, nothing else matters."

he'd been completely wrong. you were absolutely not a well-behaved girl.

#seventeen fanfic #seventeen x reader #svt fanfic #svt x reader #seventeen #seventeen imagine #svt #seventeen oneshot #seventeen smut #svt smut #seungkwan scenarios #seungkwan x reader #seungkwan smut #seungkwan fanfic

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thecommunityoftrustworthysinks · 7 months

Text

AITA for getting back at an ex who broke up with me for one relapse when i thought she was dying?

so, a little background before i get into what exactly happened: this woman i work with (my boss, actually) (great ass) (great tits too) (43f) and i (52m) have been having what you could call "flirt fights" for about ten years. you know, we hate each other, we need each other, we can't stand each other, 'will they won't they' type of thing. also, i used to have a drug problem because i have chronic pain in my leg, but at this point had been clean for a year. a few months back, we finally got together, and it was some of the happiest ive ever been in my life, and she was too. i was willing to put her before my job (something i hadn't done before) and she said she didn't need me to change for her anymore. then she had a cancer scare, and i missed a number of her appointments that she asked me to come to because i was scared of what could happen to her. i needed to go, i know i needed to go. i finally made it to an appointment, and then it turned out she was fine, and i was there with her to tell her that when she woke up. it was a big relief. but the thing was, i had popped a couple pills before going, just to make it easier. i knew i had to be there, and it wasn't working.

so later, my ex showed up at my apartment and told me she realized i had been high, and broke up with me. she said i was an addict, and couldn't take things seriously and fully present, and that it would never change. so that really sucked, and ive been having a shitty time ever since, but trying to be professional and continue on. i figured if she wanted to have our regular relationship back then i'd act like normal. im kind of known for being a bit of a dick on the job, and not a lot of people like me, so i went back to that. but now she kept taking it personally and saying it was from our breakup, yada yada. it went on like that for awhile, i got married to a beautiful russian lady (green card) (i also asked my boss/ex to sign my new wife over to my insurance, it was funny), and then we get to this week.

because of the relapse, i decided to try an experimental drug to try to regrow muscle in my leg. it hadn't been approved* yet but im a doctor so i figured i'd just give it a go anyway. then i learned from the study that the subjects had developed tumors on the muscle and died. i ran a ct scan on myself, and saw the tumors. i don't trust surgeons around muscle anymore, so i sanitized my bathroom and set up to do the surgery myself in the tub. it was going fine, but eventually the pain did get to me (i got one tumor completely out), so i called a few people, but no one picked up. eventually i had only my ex (and boss) left to call, and she picked up. she came to get me, lectured me about embarrassment or some other emotion she was saying i had, and we went to the hospital. so then yesterday she was insisting that we talk about things, as if my home surgery (that was done by a licensed physician) was because i had unprocessed feelings for her or something. both she and my best friend (45m) have been telling me i need to talk more or express my feelings more. so i listened to them, and i drove my car into the front window of my ex/boss's house. aita?

*in humans

#house md #greg house #lisa cuddy #house x cuddy #aita #hatecrimes md #gregory house #huddy #edited out the copy paste residuals pls reblog again :wails:#i did write this it was just in discord first HDKSHDJD

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claiestve · 1 month

Text

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐱𝐢𝐭 ꨄ Alex

˜”* ❝𝙁𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙬𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙙 𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙨 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙚'𝙨 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙡𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙗𝙧𝙪𝙞𝙨𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙚.❞

⎯⎯ ୨ ୧ ⎯⎯

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ᴘᴀʀᴛ 2 ᴏꜰ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ ʙᴇ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅꜱ

⎯୨⎯ " " ⎯୧⎯

“So, what? You saw him?”

“Yeah, we bumped shoulders or something and I looked and realized it was him.”

“No fucking way? And then what?”

Well, there wasn’t much to it. You wanted to say he freaked out and stared at you blankly but that wouldn’t be the truth. When you looked up at him, you noticed someone by his side. She looked oddly familiar but you were so shocked about seeing Alex that you couldn’t even process.

You wanted to act like you didn’t know who he was. You wanted to act like he was some stranger. You wanted to make him feel inferior to you. But, you couldn’t. The months you spent mourning your breakup didn’t exactly allow you to act like you didn't know him. Even when you thought everything was good now, it wasn’t. Well, you were happier, you had more important things you were worried about, but at the back of your mind, was him.

“Apologies, I didn’t mean to bump into you, Alex.”

He nodded as the woman next to him waited for him to catch up. It hurt so bad to see him not caring at all about you or the fact that you’re in front of him. He didn’t seem to care in the slightest.

“It’s alright.” He would say before trying to catch up to the woman. You couldn’t let him walk away. But if you called out for him, would that put all of your healing to waste? Would that make you seem desperate? You will find out.

“Wait! Don’t go…”

He turned around with the most clueless expression on his face. You already regretted this. You prayed to the man above that the woman he was with was not a new lover. You hoped she wasn’t some type of replacement.

“Um, are you two busy right now?” You tried to look him in the eyes but couldn’t.

“We just finished a meeting, we’re heading back now. Why?”

Okay, they’re not busy but… damn. You didn’t plan this out. Wait, a meeting? Like, they’re not dating? This was strictly business?

“Um,” The woman spoke up, “I can catch a ride nearby. You guys should catch up, it seems like you need to.”

She shot you a friendly smile and gave Alex a nod. Yeah, she knew and she happened to be so incredibly nice about it. Maybe this was all a mistake but, you needed this.

Alex waved her goodbye before walking closer to you, “So, what is this about?”

You didn’t think that one through either. What was this about? You couldn’t tell him ‘Hey I’ve been thinking about you for so long and I finally got over you but then you randomly appeared so now we’re doing this’. That wasn’t exactly an option.

“Just wanted to catch up. I mean, you’re here, I’m here, why not?”

“Listen, it’s great to see you again, but I don’t think we should. I’m still trying to figure things out, you’re probably still hurting, it’s–”

“Who said I was hurting? Last time I checked, the reason I’m even here is because I was taking myself out. I’m good, Alex. But if you want to make excuses just to not talk, be my guest.”

Yeah, that was not how that was supposed to go but you didn’t appreciate what he suggested. Yeah, you were hurting but not anymore. It was unbelievable, the audacity and confidence he had behind that when he could’ve just declined without reason.

“So, did you walk away after that? There’s no way you two would’ve continued talking after that one.”

You re-positioned yourself on the couch and looked at your friend. There was a reason why you were getting comfortable.

“Well…”

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

hello... uhhh.... surprise???

ive been tuning into the recent rap beef with kendrick and drake while writing this so you know i was motivated.

#zsakuva #asmr #sakuverse #zsakuvaxreader #alex #yahhh lets get that angst #angst #okay #pls dont be mad i left u on another cliffhanger

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year

Note

hey everyone! sorry in advance for how long this is but ive just been stuck worrying i was the asshole in this situation. heres one for the jury.

i (23f) had this friend (20m) that id known since we were both kids. we were so close that we called each other siblings for like, 5 or 6 years of our lives. we didnt always see eye to eye but most disagreements were resolved somewhat easily i thought.

one thing that my friend would do, though, was try to rehabilitate people. im a woman of color, and my friend was a white man. the two of us would meet people, who would become his friends, but would treat me like a rabid dog. id show him proof and talk to these people about it pretty often, but the treatment continued. id tell my friend that i feel unsafe, and i was scared, esp with my paranoia issues.

every single time, though, my friend would say we should stay friends with these people. he believed that if we (he) earned their respect or influenced them through our friendship with them, theyd stop being racist. the only flaw in this, i saw, was that theyd never listen to me in the first place, and he would never give me a foot in the door or speak up to defend me.

this all culminated when my ex and i broke up. he had been acquaintances at best with them, and told me he didnt like them pretty frequently. id triggered myself into a meltdown one night on him, telling him the full uncensored details of what my ex had done to me during our relationship (still in therapy for it! woo!), and hed listened. he said it sounded awful, and that he had no interest in talking to them ever again. it made me feel the safest and most cared for that id felt in a while.

...you can see where this is going. a few months later, i see that hes replied to a comment from a familiar username on one of his posts. i felt guilty for even noticing, and i didnt want to ask him, but i figured it was someone else and i was just paranoid. i sent him a DM just for confirmation that it wasnt my ex.

he spent 5 minutes typing something before just saying 'yes'. i tried to pretend it was cool but it triggered not only a ptsd attack but a huge paranoia episode. i blocked him on impulse everywhere and cut contact. it was so bad i stopped talking to people for a solid 3 months or so other than my boss and therapist.

since then, hes posted some deeply hateful stuff about me, and told our mutual friends embarrassing information which convinced them to stop talking to me too. i lost my entire friend group that id had for about 5 years over this.

ive been thinking about his philosophy lately though, and i guess i can see the logic in it. im wondering if i really was as overly sensitive as he said i was about this stuff, and that i just needed to endure it more to 'fix' these people or change their minds or whatever.

so... AITA???

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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nimata-beroya · 5 months

Text

20 Questions For Writers

This was sitting on my notifs for a few days and i finally took the time to do it. Thank my darling @takadasaiko for the tag!! 💕💕

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 88 works in total, 31 of which are for Star Wars.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

574,873 words.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, I'm only writing for Star Wars. But I used to write for Arrow and Supergirl, and ASoIAF, Dark-Hunters and Chronicles of Nick are in standby. I'm waiting for right motivation to come back to any of the last 3.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

I'm only talking about Star Wars fics here...

Kadala (The Mandalorian) [and 4th place in most kudos of all my works]

Rough Awakening (The Bad Batch) [and 5th place in most kudos of all my works]

Welcome to Yavin IV (Rebels)

An Explosive Situation (Rebels)

Rescue on Ryloth (The Bad Batch)

And the the rest of my all-time fics with most kudos are

Take Your Breath Away (Arrow)

Undisclosed Desires (Arrow)

Made For You (ASoIaF/Game of Thrones)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try my best, but sometimes I forget, and then it's been weeks and months since I got the comments that I'm embarrassed to reply them after so long. Even though, I think it's important that a writer let the reader/commenter that they appreciate it, even if it's with a simple "thank you" or an emoji. I know I'm being a hypocrite here since I fail to do what I preach, but it doesn't make it less true.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I think that would be Drifting, because it's kind of open ending, left to be interpreted, so it could end however the reader wants. Although, I left an author's note at the end saying what's my preferred ending, which always will be inclined to the happy side.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

High Above the Ground because is the happy ending i want for Commander Fox and Riyo Chuchi. They deserve only the best!

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

No, not really. I've gotten only 1 stupid message of someone criticizing a fic, but that was years ago when I still posted on FF dot net. The joke was on the reader because I moderated all the comments there so I just deleted it and nobody saw it but me. Honestly, I just laughed about it cuz their argument was just stupid.

9. Do you write smut?

I do, all kinds -from the most tame thing to the most perverted. But I used to wrote way more in my old fandoms, especially for Arrow. I think for Star Wars I've written just 1 or 2 smutty fics, and tamed at that.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I've tried a couple of occasions but never finished them. I'm not opposed to them obviously, but I do think the combination of fandoms has to be just right to work. Or at least, when it's me doing the writing.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes! Many, many years ago in the first fandom I ever wrote for. It was awful and hated it! You see, this was in the stone age of the internet when fandom specific sites abounded and not everyone had an account on FFnet yet (and Ao3 was not even a dream). The site I published on was split in 2 sections because the ships war in the fandom was bloody and ruthless, so to avoid the slaughter, I kept myself in my preferred side. But one day, a friend who read fic on both sides told me that someone stole my fics. Avoiding to get caught, the person who did it published them under a pen name that was almost exact to mine, she only added a period at the end, which could easily go unnoticed. Oh, and she interchanged characters names so it'd fit the other ship.

At first, my friend thought I had posted them but she knew I'd never write for that ship, like ever. In the end, it turned out that I wasn't the only one who had being plagiarized. Several people ON BOTH SIDES were. Thankfully, the person was caught and banned, but we almost burned the site down because of the whole shitshow.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

By me, yes, several. All into Spanish (my mother tongue). By others, not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yes! A couple of times for different fandoms, and I loved it. I hope I'll do it again. The thing is that you need to find the right partner for it, or it can be a nightmare.

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

I don't appreciate this question, let me tell you. It's hard to choose. But I think I have to go with Olicity. I love them still (even if the show ending ruined it for me). Close second would be Braime (and I'm glad that there's still hope for them on the books, because as usual the show fucked them so but sooooo bad)

And as Star Wars specific, I don't think anyone will be surprised if I say it's Kalluzeb, right 🤣 They're my babies and I adore them!

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Anything for Arrow or Supergirl. I sworn off those fandoms after their respectively awful endings.

No promises, but there's still hope for all if my unfinished works for Star Wars 😅

16. What’s your writing strengths?

Coming up with ideas. So, so many ideas. All the time and I want to write them all.

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

Finishing writing the above-mentioned ideas. I tend to splay myself too much when I'm writing, and it takes me forever to get to the portion I really want to write (usually the idea that sparked the whole writing process) and I lose steam. That's why I have so many unfinished WIPs. I wish they'd write themselves.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It's ok if used sparingly. A word here, a phrase over there is fine, but if a wall of dialogue that the reader needs to scroll down to the notes or click on a tooltip to find out the meaning it's the worst!!! A better solution for a writer that really needs/wants to have a whole conversation in another language for plot reasons or whatever, then all they need to do is to say once that the characters are talking in the other language and put the dialogue in the same language they've been writing the rest of the narrative and in italic.

The characters who don't speak the language won't understand what's being said, but the reader will and their reading will be more pleasant and fluid.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

An Argentinian show called Floricienta. A modern retelling of Cinderella.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

I don't like this question either! All my fics are my babies! How do you want me to choose?!! There are so many I'm proud of. I guess I'll point the most recent one: Feed Me Poison, Fill me till I Drown I really like how this story is coming along. It's not done yet (what else is new? 😅) but what's coming is so so good!

Tagging (no pressure): @renee561 @thecoffeelorian @genericficerblog @airlockfailure @mistr3ssquickly @insertmeaningfulusername @fanfictasia

#20 asks for writers #ask game #the mandalorian #the bad batch #sw rebels #kalluzeb #braime #foxiyo #mare writes star wars #and other things #olicity #long post

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eriexplosion · 4 months

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MOVING FROM SOME EASY EPISODES TO THE HARDEST. OUTPOST.

Do y'all remember the hype for this episode like we knew it was THE Crosshair episode and everyone was absolutely thirsting for it.

"A new friend is made on a harsh and unforgiving outpost planet" WHO WROTE THIS SUMMARY?

Like yes technically accurate as it doesn't specify that the new friend survives the friendship.

Crosshair clearly paying much more attention to the regs these days, at this point I do think he's pretty much had all his bullshit beaten out of him when it comes to thinking he's better than anyone else. Just in time for Crosshair's Worse Time Parade to start.

Much like Hemlock, Lieutenant Nolan is established as absolute garbage the instant he sees Crosshair taking like two seconds to breathe out of his helmet and tells him he's out of uniform. If The Bad Batch can do one thing it's write a man that sucks.

AND THEN HE MAKES IT WORSE WITH "I DON'T LIKE USED EQUIPMENT"

Literally would kill this man myself and he's been on screen for 30 seconds

THE ICE VULTURE <3 OUR BOY'S NEW MOTIF <3

MAYDAY. MAYYYYYDAYYYYYY.

HE IS HERE!

God Mayday was complicated because like I loved him from the moment I saw him but also like, coming into this episode just logistically we knew anyone that showed Crosshair a hint of kindness was almost certainly going to get killed, so Mayday is loved for the exact thing that put him on the path to narrative doom. Reinforcements or no reinforcements, it doesn't matter, Mayday was never leaving Barton IV alive.

They waited 36 rotations. 4 days longer than Crosshair was left to nearly starve on a platform. If I remember correctly (I'm not there yet) Crosshair says the trip took 2 hours. None of their lives were worth two hours.

THE WAY MAYDAY HAS TWO, TWO MEN LEFT UNDER HIS COMMAND. ONLY TWO. HE HAD TO WATCH THE REST ALL DIE UNDER HIS WATCH. I AM SO FUCKING UNWELL ABOUT HIM.

I really love the name Hexx btw

"Respect is something to be earned." And immediately Nolan goes nuclear to insult him because he wasn't instantly given unconditional deference.

YEP IT WAS TWO HOURS. TWO HOURS OUT OF THE WAY.

I am going to scream from the layers of unfair this is.

The way Mayday's voice softens a touch when left alone with Crosshair though, always gentler with another clone.

I'm still not over the LONG pause after Mayday introduces himself, like Crosshair is trying to dig past the shields he put up between himself and his situation to remember his own name. He probably hasn't heard it at all since Cody.

Mayday looked at Crosshair and apparently felt the desperation for company rolling off him in smothering waves because he instantly is just like 'you're under my wing now'

That he's been out here over a year meaning that the Empire has been established for over a year is a lot to take in like god Crosshair has been away from home for so long.

"You'll freeze to death in that armor" He is like 10 seconds from wrapping Crosshair in a blanket I swear to god I'm only slightly projecting.

"Vicious creatures, but you have to admire 'em. They find a way to survive." GOD I LOVE THAT LINE. ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC.

Using the explosion through heat vision to completely screw Crosshair's up for the shot was such a good excuse to have him just wound the guy instead of kill him, lol.

Still was surprised to see a blood trail in this cartoon, but sure they can't show us any sign of Tech's body right (YES I AM STILL ON THIS AND WILL BE UNTIL THEY SHOW US THE BOY)

Goddddd him putting Hexx and Veetch's helmets next to all of the others. His very last brothers, the men he was responsible for, god I am in tatters about it. Every second of this episode is just. Grief and Pain.

"Remind me not to die on your watch" Don't worry you're the only person that's been nice to him in months he will literally drag you through hell to save your life. Crosshair just has what we call "Something is wrong with him" disease and all of his words pass through the cortex that makes him rude before getting to you.

My thoughts on this mine disarming scene are Many but let it just be said that I still cannot believe they put this on my screen, it was made explicitly for me to be feral to.

Mayday has learned fast how to talk to Crosshair though, gotta give him some snark back.

"They're... gone." "And here we are. The survivors."

GOD I AM UNHINGED ABOUT THIS.

"If I don't hear a boom then I'll know it worked." "Glad you're confident in your work." "Oh I'm confident, I'm just not stupid."

I just love this back and forth dynamic that they hit perfectly and immediately.

Hey Crosshair actually wins a hand to hand fight all he has to do is sneak up on them and not give them the opportunity to actually hit him back.

Shout out to the guy whose first instinct was to try and RUN MAYDAY OVER WITH A CAR like it didn't work but impressive ingenuity.

Clones dying to guard the gear intended for their replacements god it makes me ILL.

"We're good soldiers. We followed orders. And for what?"

The entire thing is designed to drive a wedge into Crosshair's brain and break through the thick shield he's built around himself where he is so sure if he just follows orders Well Enough maybe he can make everything he's done and lost worth it in the end but he can't because he never had a future in the Empire and no amount of sunk cost fallacy will change that.

AND JUST IN TIME FOR HIS EPIPHANY WE GET THE AVALANCHE.

Literally would be so fascinating to see exactly what was running through Mayday's head when he chose to push Crosshair out of the way of the rock instead of jumping to safety himself. He just met this guy, he's not technically responsible for him, but Mayday has lost every single soldier he was in command of, sole survivor of his unit, and he finally, finally had the opportunity to save someone. If he only saves one person, maybe he's done something worthwhile.

And honestly, Crosshair is trying to do the same back to him. Just Mayday dies knowing he succeeded and Crosshair lives knowing he failed.

I am fucking destroyed by this episode by the way like it is so unbearably good and also tragic as hell.

Mayday trying to get Crosshair to leave him behind and the music when Crosshair decides absolutely the fuck not. That they have one helmet between them and Crosshair put it on Mayday's head and not his own.

THE MUSIC AS CROSSHAIR IS SO DETERMINED TO DRAG HIM BACK AND THE ICE VULTURE OVERHEAD MY GOD.

The moment of them huddling together in a tiny little hideaway in the rock ends me too, like, images that stick in my head forever.

And despite everything Crosshair made it he got Mayday back to the outpost alive, he did everything to accomplish the impossible and it should have been enough, but it wasn't all because Nolan doesn't value either of their lives enough to even lift a single finger for Mayday.

Like Crosshair accomplishing the impossible through sheer stubbornness only to have it pulled away at the last second I am in AGONY.

HE GAVE MAYDAY HIS SNIPER RIFLE TO USE AS A CRUTCH FOR GODS SAKE

Crosshair taking Mayday's helmet off and at least giving him one last moment of human connection before it's over

The voice acting in this moment is absolutely unbelievable but especially on 'Help him' like give DBB all the money in the world because I was shattered.

THE FACT THAT THEY MADE US LISTEN TO MAYDAY GURGLE COUGH OUT HIS LAST BREATH AND SEE THE INSTANT HIS EYES ROLL BACK AND CLOSE

"He served his purpose as a soldier of the Empire" OWN WORDS THROWN BACK INTO HIS FACE LIKE A FUCKING PUNCH

The way Crosshair's words drop back down into a growl as he says "You could have saved him." is so good too.

The music as it all reaches its boiling point, as he sees the vulture's shadow, then Mayday's body, then the vulture itself just. Oh god. This episode is a masterpiece and I'm still not over it. I don't think I'll ever be over it.

Like I still cannot BELIEVE we got this shot? The rock wings? I'm? Inconsolable?

Crosshair really probably thought he was going to die right there next to Mayday and honestly I think he was okay with it, in the worst way possible. Also him unconscious here is literally THE most relaxed I think we've ever seen his face.

But because this is only the start of Crosshair's Life Getting Much Much Worse he gets to live and wake up in a horrible science lab!

The sedative injection is much worse given the way that they torture him later.

"Cooperate and you might survive."

Literally one of the best episodes of anything I've ever seen I still cannot believe that we got it, truly. This episode is like 95% of the reason I have faith in the writers pulling through on the Tech Issue because I don't think anyone that gave Crosshair this episode arc would actually kill Tech off in such a stupid way on a completely pointless side quest.

I'm still on the rock wings and will be until further notice.

#the bad batch rewatch

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suffarustuffaru · 2 months

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If you don't mind me asking but when did you first get into re:zero

yeah i dont mind at all :o ig yallre gonna hear my full origin story now haah. its my—my… ok id say tragic backstory but i dont think this is really that tragic LMAO. my humorous backstory? silly backstory?

anyway i got into rezero in summer of 2020!! this was months before s2 started airing and by around this time there was just s1, s1 directors cut may or may not have been out?? i forgor :<, but then s2’s first teaser came out right about now.

it was quarantine…. i was bored one day and wanted smth new to watch… and by then id only really briefly seen rezero—like you know that s1 promo poster with subaru standing there while surrounded by some of the main girls in s1 (beatrice felt emilia rem ram)?? yeah id seen that. in the back of my mind i kinda assumed the show was just another one of those abt a dude surrounded by his harem of girls or smth?? :< but then i learned the Real Premise is the time travel. via death!!!! and ive always loveddd angst and whump so i was like “NO FUCKING WAY I HIT THE JACKPOT” and eagerly looked into rezero some more to see if it was worth watching. and then i saw all the shit reviews on rz that never seemed to agree on if it was good or not…… and then gigguk’s video…… and then i saw mother’s basement on youtube make a defense of rezero s1 and i was like!!! ok fuck it im watching this show. i want the angst i want the complex time travel shit. i think id spoiled myself on a couple of subarus deaths by this point trying to decide if i should commit to rezero and then i started binge watching s1!! esp when i was like ok this is a good time to get into it s2 was announced right??

anyway i got hooked on rezero fr 👍👍 the first s1 emisuba lap pillow had me quaking in my boots ;-;;; and i was already invested from ep1 bc i liked the characters a lot already!!! i am simply BUILT DIFFERENT i loved subaru from day one!!! by the royal selection episodes ofc i was dying of secondhand embarrassment but tbh i grew even more invested in rezero after that!! i was and still am super impressed that the narrative had the balls to have subaru fuck up sooo so so bad there. like seeing that emisuba argument and the julisuba duel for the first time was crazyyy. the conflict was really good and the latter s1 development…. woagh.

and then you know i finish s1 and i immediately get to researching how to read, i read arc 4’s wn and bawl my eyes out from the sheer amount of rollercoaster both the emotions and Long Ass Novel gave me (yes i was bawling my eyes out at parent and child) (yes i was bawling my eyes out at choose me) (yes i was bawling my eyes out for all the suffering loops) (yes i was bawling) (i have no clue how i read all those pages fr like that arc is massive), i speedrun arc 5, i accidentally spoil certain bits for myself (arc 6 stuff), i read most of arc 6 in spurts, tune in every week for s2 (and bawled my eyes out seeing the s2 part 1 op for the first time) etc etc!! one thing lead to another and now i am here…….. three yrs in this fandom… nearly (?) a yr being active on rezero tumblr… HAH

also i made a reddit account back inn…. 2020 or 2021 bc i wanted to be a tinyyy bit active in rezero reddit (this was half a mistake btw. i think i have more balls of steel now but my younger self was sooooo naive. shaking them by the shoulders. this is an anime fandom!!!!!! and this is reddit!!! whatre u expecting???? i am less shy now on the internet thats for sure!!). anyway im still a tiny bit active on rz reddit now after not touching it for like a year. now i use my reddit account for spreading otto propaganda and slander /lh …../hj

but anyway ive never been active in fandoms until rezero and thats bc id usually lurk and a lot of my past hyperfixation medias were :< big fandoms :<<< but then. ok im a fanfic enjoyer and i didnt write much fanfic or publish fic at all before this fandom but then in 2020 after watching s1 i checked rezero’s ao3 page and *sniffles* *sobs* thERE WAS ONLY LIKE 2 PAGES ON THERE MAN….. A WHOLE DESERT…. yes and then one thing lead to another and now there is more fic and also ig id be considered an english fic writer elder maybe…… i started posting in like fall/winter 2020? and maaaan im one of the only ppl from that era whos still posting i think!!! ive seen the entire english fanfic scene pop up!! ive participated in a bunch of community events… sooo wild to think about. i feel old guys!!!

but now i have gotten more and more active in the rz fandom yes :3 its been fun!! rezero is very important media to me and ive met lots of cool people in my time here :) when october 2024 rolls around itll be s3 time (AAAAA HYPE HYPE HYPE) and like four yrs of me being in this fandom?? its wild but my lifes genuinely changed a lot bc of me getting into rezero!! met lots of cool people… made pals… gotten my writing and art out there and improved on it via. large amounts of rezero fanart HAH.. became more unhinged.. etc etc :D even got to meet one of my buddies i met via rezero irl 👍👍 more irl crossover events will happen i swear.

also gigguk in my eyes redeemed himself for his old rezero skit vid by making a glowing review for rezero s2 with his pals. i can forgive him i suppose :<<<

in conclusion: idk if i count as a fandom elder but i sure have a lot of my own fandom lore pfft :<<<

#ask #suffaru post #people including english professors have told me theyre impressed with my writing but truth is ive just been writing a shit ton of anime #fanfic for the last three or so years LMFAO

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