some rwrb phone lockscreens/wallpapers. (part 1 part 2 part 3)

if you like/use them please reblog, i’d really appreciate it. the best way for others to see this is if people reblog the post rather than just liking it.

The tumblr q&a is over, but I was curious! I love all the different phrases the characters in isat/sasasa:p use--If it's something you can say, where did inspiration for "gems alive" and other phrases come from?

THANK YOU FOR ASKING BECAUSE I GET TO TALK ABOUT WORLDBUILDING AND SWEAR WORDS AND BRANDON SANDERSON

long post ahead

ok so when I was figuring out the world, I found this lecture on worldbuilding by Brandon Sanderson (go watch it, and also go read his books), and (im gonna paraphrase heavily here) one thing he mentioned is that, to make a memorable world, one thing you can do is pick a couple areas of culture, and go real deep with it. So like, pick fashion, and architecture, and interior design, and develop those a bunch, and bam! you convinced people you have a whole dang world, even though you only developed 3 areas of this world. hollow iceberg everyone thinks is a real iceberg.

he also mentioned the idea of like... getting weird with it? and develop based on a weird detail? for example, in his book The Stormlight Archives, one detail is that women have to hide their left hand at all times. ok, so what does that mean, whats taboo about a left hand? is the left hand shameful, or lewd somehow, the same way ankles were for us? what about fashion, what does women's fashion look like? and how do you live your every day life, knowing you can't show this hand, can you carry things the same way? etc

SO, for me, one of the Big Worldbuilding pillars i picked was, uh, swear words lol. or language and common expressions, more generally. i went on a whole journey where i was like... ok swear words in a LOT of languages (including french and english, both languages i speak fluently) are either sexual, or about gross bodily discharges. you know what words i mean!!!!!

and, well, i also didnt want the game to be full of those words, mostly because i think its a tightrope to use those words without seeming cringe, and also because i have a Core Memory of showing a comic to a colleague and she said "well i wouldve liked to show it to my kids, but you said fuck 12 times in there" and i didnt show my face to her for a week. family friendly family friendly family friendly

so what swear words should my characters use, that arent the same ones we use? and could those swear words actually tell us something about the world they live in? could i actually use those swear words... to show the characters come from different cultures???

and what COULD swear words be like, if theyre not about sex or body stuff? well irl they're usually about religions or belief. "oh god", "goddamnit", etc. as a sidenote, stuff like "oh my god" or "geez" arent used, because jesus christ is not canon to the ISAT universe. alright

i decided very early on i wouldnt have those in the game either, but i COULD have them be about the religions specific to this world. and for insults, i could have them be about stuff those beliefs would see as lesser.

anyway instead of talking about "gems alive" lets talk about "crab"

isabeau+mirabelle+bonnie use "crab" as a swear word because they follow a religion all around change, bettering yourself, evolving, and, the crab meme,

for those who dont get the joke, its about carcinisation, and about how a bunch of non-crab-like forms somehow evolved to a crab-like form. which would be horrible, for a religion all based around change!!! you mean we change and evolve, but theres a chance we might all become crabs??? CRAB!!!!!!!

anyway having "crab" kinda reads as 1. swear word 2. thats funny and weird (sets the tone) 3. tells you they know what crabs are (world not that different from ours, AND means they live close-ish to the coast, aka not land locked) and 4. crabs are somehow hated/feared, even if as the player you dont get why, it shows this country has its own culture (even if you dont get the crabs joke, which uuuh apparently doesnt work as well in countries that dont have this specific meme. WHATEVER!!!!)

(a few people came to me saying "heh, i get it, because crab and crap are very similar words" and um actually i did not think about that. crab is just a funny word on its own, and also i am a comedy genius without even trying)

anyway tldr: swear words as a worldbuilding tool. soon in theaters

Opinion on Reinhard's dad possibly seeing "the son he never had" on Garfiel? It could totally take that route tbh

It would be a fun dynamic imo

oh anon as a heinkel fan (hes soo terrible but so fascinating and i WANT to see him get better and grow as a person. but also you may have known that since you are asking me this hah) and someone who is quite fond of garf i lovedddd the recent heinkel-garfiel chapters... and LMAO this idea of like. heinkel being a bit soft on garfiel bc yay!! new son replacement!!! is SO FUNNY ive thought about it a little bit. and IT WOULD BE FUN and i think heinkels arc is super interesting bc he kinda hit his rock bottom in like about arc 7-early arc 8 where its like. its post arc 5 astrea drama so shit just got even more bleak for heinkel, hes stuck in dangerous territory and he doesnt believe in himself At All and hes too depressed to really try all that much at anything.

but then GARFIEL comes along and saves heinkel a couple times and garfiel gets hit down but keeps getting right tf up - and that goes against like literally everything heinkel thinks. he doesnt try to be better bc he doesnt think he can ever accomplish it no matter how hard he tries, but garfiel is someone who just WONT stop trying.

and we also see that heinkel learning more about rowan and cecilus and the whole deal with the segmunts has made heinkel go "oh. okay haha maybe im not as far gone as i thought" bc heinkel gets shown another example of a dysfunctional family with an extremely op son and a deadbeat alcoholic dad and theyre a mirror of reinhard and heinkel. except rowan and cecilus are like if reinhard and heinkel werent so miserable about their shit relationship, bc as shitty as heinkels behavior is deep down he still CARES. he cares a lot about his family. he misses reinhard - why else would he need schult to be a replacement? he's still mourning that loss, if you think about it. but rowan is just so batshit that heinkel immediately goes backtracking like "OKAY IM. IM NOT THAT BAD. MAYBE THERES A TINY LITTLE SPECK OF HOPE FOR ME AFTER ALL."

and garfiel is helping to be a catalyst as well bc of his own determination to always keep growing and keep fighting no matter what gets in his way. hes a spunky little kid whos powerful but when faced with opponents stronger than him Refuses To Give Up. thats inspirational i think for heinkel, especially when its not as if hes a shit fighter, dude is just outshadowed by his family and other people around him. he just has to get up and keep trying, so its interesting that heinkel DOES find the courage to try and protect garfiel while garfiel's trying not to die.

like i do think that its heinkel like having this grudging respect for garfiel after the interactions theyve had, also possibly feeling inspired by garfiel and having that tiny bit of hope in him after meeting rowan and interacting with garfiel, and also trying to repay garfiel. bc heinkel treats himself like dirt and gets treated like dirt a lot - im sure his thought process might be "this kid took the time to keep saving me even though im literally worthless and now hes in danger, this is the least i can do". i would be interested if it went the route of like. heinkel having that fatherly instinct rekindled - i think itd be interesting for garfiel as well bc. he IS lacking a father figure, but for heinkel, i think that its clear with how he acts with schult that heinkel does kind of miss having a son and having that sort of love in his life.

we know he DID use to be a good dad, and tbh i always kind of headcanoned that heinkel probably isnt that mean with most kids unless its someone like. you know. subaru. or julius. or reinhard of course. like heinkels not that much of an ass when his life is on the line or when there isnt super personal stakes involved (ie astrea stuff). hes a character that carries a lot of guilt and shame and self-hatred, someone who's spiraled into being the worst version of himself when he used to be bright-eyed and hardworking and full of love despite the weight on his shoulders - i think he would see a very kind and determined and spirited kid like garfiel (and might be reminded of the kid he Used to love) and hope that garfiel doesnt end up like him (ie lost, burnt out, and depressed). we see this sort of behavior a bit with schult too, bc heinkel tries to give schult advice and tries to look after schult a bit in general!! and garfiel's like a better version of heinkel you know? garfiel's a bit abrasive with a quick temper and all but hes extremely well intentioned in just about everything he does. and i think heinkel might have a fondness for all of garfiel's antics at this point T^T

but yes ty for the ask anon !! :o im very interested to see where heinkel and garfiel go from here, bc it looks like heinkel's started some baby steps in his growth!!

Hello I have a quick question and it’s not from a place of hate at all I’m new to kink and I saw you answer an anon about someone cutting themselves for you and you said it helps to find someone who self harms already. Does someone self harming do something for you? I’m assuming the person is self harming from a place of self hatred. If you do get off to the person cutting themselves out of self hatred do you feel guilt about it? I think i’m wording it harsher than I want but I can’t find any other way to word it I’m genuinely curious and mean no hate towards you at all I find you funny if I’m not to lie

I also have another question you seem to talk to a lot to people do they ever feel jealousy towards one another and do you get jealous when they talk to others?

-🕊

You're very sweet and i understand how you think you're being harsh but there's really no way to like talk about that without being harsh in a sense. But i didnt take any offense at all!! You did a great job at wording it and being clear you're not coming from a place of judgement. I am 1000% happy to answer any questions from anyone involving kink stuff or even personal stuff.

Okay so

Ive personally encouraged girls to stop s/h but at the end of the day theres nothing I can do bc a lot of times It becomes an addiction. So for me, i use it as a "if you have to do it, at least make it a pleasure source rather a way to release pain" if that makes sense?

The girl who cut my name into her, i dont think she actively S/H and if i remember correctly she doesnt. She just randomly asked what id do if she carved my name into her / or maybe i made a joke like prove youre obsessed by carving my name. I have a horrid memory lmfao.

I do feel bad though, when a girl cuts for me. But that bad feeling is kinda hot. Like that shame, knowing i just had a girl mutilate her body FOR ME. For my gratification. Its like the ultimate way of domination through long distance, if that makes sense? Lmfao

I personally wouldnt encourage it unless she felt sexually about it. If she's honestly manic, i refuse.

There was one time a girl said she really wanted to relapse just to cut for me and i begged her not to. I would never want someone to fall back into a bad habit just for a hot picture. She didnt do it, and we never looked back lol

On to the jealousy thing - i do talk to a lot of girls, 5 regularly, and 3 that are like id die for them. And then some girls i just chat with on occasion.

One of them gets VERY jealous but she hides it well. I always tell her she can express her emotions but she doesn't

One of them hasnt really made it clear, but she does know that she is #1 like at the end of the day id cut everything off for her

And the other one, shes a fuckin hoe just like me and probably doesnt even know i genuinely like her beyond like casually.

I do get jealous, very jealous, and it sucks, I've ruined relationships over it, but im learning to let it go. I know my value, they show me my value regularly, so theres nothing to really feel down about besides the idea of them just telling me what theyre telling other dudes lol.

Theres some fuckin creep who always sends "bestie" asks and it pisses me off every fucking time.

(ask box is fully empty??? Sigh i guess ill have to ask more worldbuilding questions what a shame) do any of the other eeveelutions have powers or is it just the really cool brand of espeon?

ENZO: i spark sometimes when im upset

ENZO: usually dont do big bursts because that takes a lot out of me and i dont rlly have a reason other than party trick

ENZO: i can also kinda charge myself with electricity when im low on energy and it actually works

ENZO: i know jolteons energy kind of stems from their magic and sometimes they need to use external sources so i do like to do that its nice

ENZO: yes i literally just plug in a phone charger and chew on it and it works like a charm theres products specifically for jolteons but theyre kinda expensive so thats how i do it

ENZO: lmao do you think there are jolteons that cheat on like marathons?

ENZO: sorry we had to kick out georgie norton because we discovered during the 40 mile marathon he shoved a battery up his ass

ENZO: thatd be great PR

rant under the cut abt like. books i guess?

the weirdest thing abt andrea long chu’s article abt ottessa moshfegh and how ppl reacted to it is that like. alc didnt rlly like.. say anything that wasnt already known. like ppl knew that moshfegh put racism and fatphobia and other bigoted or “gross” themes into her work, theres literally no way u could have claimed to read her books w/o noticing that. this isn’t to say that that shouldn’t be criticized—i def think some of it should be, to an extent—but plenty of ppl had already been criticizing moshfegh for this before acl’s article, but the majority of ppl just didnt care at all bc at that point moshfegh was still popular and on social media she was the “super unhinged aesthetic girlboss woman writer” or whatever. it was only when a somewhat popular person said “man this stuff is Weird right guys” that ppl suddenly did a complete 180 and decided that they hated moshfegh bc she was Problematic Now I Guess. like, just a day ago the same ppl were talking abt how much they loved her bc she wrote abt “unhinged women” (a term im glad to see is finally dying out somewhat) and right after the alc article they acted like they were just. completely and totally blind to everything that was criticized, as if it wasnt literally in their faces the entire time, and now they’re totally dumping moshfeghs books bc the general consensus now is that shes Bad.

again i do think there are some aspects of moshfegh’s writing and some things shes said that should be criticized, im not saying shes like innocent or anything, im just saying its weird how ppl’s opinions seemed to flip on a dime overnight. it feels like no one even rlly had like. a real opinion of their own. they liked moshfegh bc ppl were pushing that “unhinged woman” persona onto her and everyone just loved that, but when one popular person is like “erm.. shes kinda problematic and talks abt shit a lot for some reason” ppl are so quick to hate her bc thats how they Should feel. i dont know i feel like a broken record but its just so weird to me. maybe im being biased bc i personally find alc and some of her opinions really weird & annoying, and i do enjoy ottessa moshfegh’s writing (though i also have my own complicated feelings abt it), but like. it still strikes me as unfair. i also found it a bit confusing how alc talked abt moshfegh’s fatphobia in her books but not abt the racism or the ableism, which were also two really big criticisms of her at the time. i dont have any particular horse in that race so i wont say more but like. if ur gonna write an entire article at least mention those two, like id say theyre pretty major

i also dont like the mindset that writing abt taboo or gross things like moshfegh does is inherently bad. now i Know that this wasnt the point alc was trying to make at all, but i feel like its something that ppl on booktok and booktwt or whatever seem to believe sometimes. sometimes ppl just write abt pathetic, bigoted, awful people and use “dirty” ways to describe things, moshfegh certainly isnt the first and she definitely wont be the last. again, i have my own criticisms of her and im not saying that she shouldn’t have been criticized for anything alc mentioned, bc i feel like that did need to be acknowledged a bit, but moshfegh’s unflinching approach to awful ppl and disgusting subjects and her swift and direct writing style is what drew me to her so much. alc wasnt rlly criticizing moshfegh for writing like this, in fact she was actually pretty complimentary abt it, but this was the sentiment that i saw a lot of “booktok” ppl having when they talked abt the article

i probably wont talk much abt alc anymore but like. abt her in general, its a shame bc i do think shes a Good Writer on an objective level. she knows how to word things eloquently and in interesting ways and how to structure her points and just how to Write Well. but i also just think shes annoying and her opinions on gender and transition just dont rub me the right way. i would go looking for those tweets she made and some paragraphs from her book “females”, but im lazy and im not gonna put in extra effort for this post that is basically just a stream of consciousness rant. but it feels like her whole philosophy around transness revolves soley around her personal experiences and how much she hates being trans. she calls another trans woman “a dumb blonde” in her book for acting feminine “in the way she should”, then goes onto say that someone’s personal identity and feelings abt their gender is “on its own, worthless” and that gender is something that “other people have to decide for you”, which is the only reason why ppl transition. she also made a tweet saying how, for political reasons, people replaced the term “real” women with “cis” women, and it wasnt said in a way that was criticizing that, it was said in a “well, this is just the way it is guys, nothing wrong with it, just face the truth” sort of way. there are a bunch of other things i found weird but honestly i formed my opinions abt her a long time ago so i cant remember it all, and again i cant be fucked to find anything right now. maybe if someone asks i’ll link to a couple articles criticizing her work

ANYWAY, back to books and how ppl treat stories abt anything disturbing or upsetting like theyre inherently bad. i think at some point i’m gonna read things have gotten worse since we last spoke. ive heard a lot of bad things abt it but unsurprisingly most of it was from booktok ppl who just. Didnt like that this horror book had horror in it, and that the horror was gross and disturbed them. i guess i cant fault them bc it probably just wasnt the sort of book theyre used to reading or like, which is fine, but dont make it seem like it’s a bug and not a feature. if it disturbed u then. like. it sort of succeeded? thats the point, its horror, it was advertised as gross and disturbing. its a shame bc from what ive heard abt it it seems like the exact kind of book id love, and the concept is so interesting to me. i guess i should hold my tongue before i read it but i feel like it gets a lot of undeserved hatred

10 Anti LO Asks

1. Ah, yes. Hades' dog. Cerberus. Guardian of the Underworld. And over there, we have Hades' other dogs that serve as a comic relief and/or to make Hades look like a dog dad.

Mushroom, Russell, 𝒞ℴ𝓇𝒹ℴ𝓃 ℬ𝓁ℯ𝓊, J.P, Fudge, ᵐᵉˡⁱ, Fudge and ʙ ɪ ɢ ᴊ ᴏ ʜ ɴ.

Rachel literally cannot come up with original names for anything. It's so sad.

2. rachel is so bad at actually aligning the gods to proper colors and symbolism that dionysus will probably be neon orange with purple splotches and she'll claim its some genius "twist" on semele's human skin and zeus's ... whatever he is. also no leaves or grapes because that doesnt fit the ~modern aesthetic~

3. have any of you guys watched OSP? RS "borrowed" most of her ideas from them too, especially in regards to her depiction of Hades, Zeus, and Demeter.

From OP: RS probably got most of her ideas off of tumblr tbh. She was on tumblr for a long time so it wouldn’t be surprising if it rubbed off on her.

4. LMAO that's also it like basically every god including hades was in some way related to different times of fertility. zeus was both biologically and nature via rain, demeter was for mothers, food, and the earth, hera for the period cycle and motherhood, and the list goes on and on. even as that other person said the "maidens" also were fertility, artemis and hecate especially. if anything being a fertility deity is one of the least rare things to be, but why would rachel know that 🙄

5. correct me if im wrong here, but didnt most ancient art of persephone depict her as "queenly" so ... as an adult? like she was supposed to look similar aged to hades and the rest of the olympians, not so young like rachel depicts her. idk where she thought the queen of the dead should be a airheaded teenager, but whatever.

6. what i dont get is virginity as a concept is so misogynistic, yet rachel plays into it straight where no one questions why theres a whole society and scholarship around it, and persephone seems perfectly fine to keep it intact. until she all of sudden only has sexual feelings for hades, tho hades even shames her for seemingly not wanting to have sex (and also calls her a fertility goddess, so is it rare or not?) and i just, idk the whole idea is so dumb?? rachel why would you do this

7. if rachel's fans actually suggested/voted she add in persephone be assaulted i might throw up. why would anyone purposely ask for the lead character to be sexually assaulted because rachel wants her story to be more "serious" when she clearly cant depict it right and is using the actual assault in a disgusting way to push her romance along? if her fans suggested that theyre genuinely unwell. thats not ok.

8. IDK to me I think LO fails is because Rachel desperately is trying to make literal gods #Relatable and I just think that's not how the gods should be depicted? I'm not saying they can't have issues or flaws, but she doesn't even allow them that? They're all just boring archetypes? And because of this "Just Like Us" depiction is makes times it tries to be Fantasy (the AOW, Royal hierarchy, the Pom, Kronos, etc) it just doesn't mesh well at all and makes the world confusing over intriguing.

9. Honestly season one LO is kinda good? Don't get me wrong it DEFINITELY has it's flaws and shitty ideas but overall it was interesting and very cute in some episodes and there were more than 2 central characters. I agree with anon from previous posts that LO would have been so much better without "adult themes". Her take on toxic relationships and personal freedom would be enough in the light rom-com atmosphere and collage life(like it meant to be from the start). Ugh I'm so sad when I think about it, LO is such a shitshow in season 2 

10. Alright I'm seeing a lot of controversy I guess? Over the "sexy plant watering scene" and I'm gonna add my two cents on that as well as some other things of note.

1. The "Persephone waters plants in sexy lingerie" is a weird scene - because of the framing. One anon was wondering what's wrong with watering your plants in your undies - its nothing, theres no issue there. The issue (to me) is the way the narrative frames the scene: Thetis accuses Persephone of murder and of wanting to be romantically involved with Hades (despite knowing of his relationship with Minthe) and the scene shifts to Perse watering minthe the plant in lingerie. The reason it comes off as weird is because A). This is Thetis's recounting of events, so its not accurate and B). It feels as though the Only reason this shot was in the comic at all was because RS wanted another "girlboss" moment with Persephone looking sexy and being nearly naked (once again) and flaunting her power over Minthe via watering her while wearing lingerie as a way of saying "look who has the power here. I'm wandering around the place that could've been yours AND im f*cking your boyfriend/would-be husband"

(It feels like in Thetis version Persephone is some kind of sexy seductress villain but really RS just wanted to sexualize Perse again).

2. The narrative sometimes frames things oddly and that causes a disconnect. Like the scene (not sure which chapter) where Hades takes Persephone shopping and though she doesn't feel comfortable / doesn't want to have sex with him, she still asks him "dont you want me" and (again, to me anyway) it feels as though theres this gross unspoken message there of Persephone saying "dont you want me (even though im damaged goods / have been damaged / been used by somebody else) even though Hades has no knowledge of Persephones SA. It comes off as the only thing shes worried about (despite the SA just happening a week or so ago) is whether or not this new man who she barely knows will still be attracted to her / will want her after finding out shes been r*ped.

3. The more I read LO the more it feels as though every single character is really just an OC of RS's wearing Greek deity skin. Like as though RS wanted to tell a specific story but knew it might not have done well in its own so she slapped on a "Greek Myth / characters names" to boost the comics attention without actually doing any research into the culture. The characters feel as though they have Nothing in common with the actual Greek deities their supposedly based on and considering the few myths that Hades and Persephone Do show up in and in relation to LO's plot, I just dont understand Why their called by the Greek deities names. When was there Ever a myth where Persephone was on trial for murder? When did Hera - thw goddess of marriage and fidelity ever cheat on Zeus (espeically with his brother, Hades?) - (And yes, I know its a "modern retelling" but I feel as though there is a way to do that and incorporate themes / stories from the actual myths without making up nonsensical plot lines) The only reason I can think of for why their Greek deities is popularity purposes.

4. A while back someone came into one of my posts regarding my confusion over LO's trial plotline and they said that RS admitted she did not fully plan out the trial plot and is really just going week by week at this point (and I don't know if thats true or not) however! If it is true, then that feels like a huge oversight on her part as a writer. Most writers I know (myself included) like to have an outline for some plot points, maybe the beginning and end and then you fill in the gaps along the way. And I'm not saying you have plan out every single step to every chapter, but it seems like it would be a good thing to at least have some kind of idea or general direction for what happens during this arc in the story rather than flying by the seat of your pants, yeah? Wouldn't you want to have something a bit more concrete in mind when doing a so-called important story arc ?

5. I know this has been harped on again and again but, why why why would you have Persephone start off as a barely legal teenager whos just going into college vs the much much older business CEO who has rage issues and is into impressionable young women?

6. On another note: why does Persephone act as though being from Sicily is like the equivalent of someone from Georgia or Texas moving to New York as though (despite being a goddess) she acts as though she might be mocked for being some kind of "Greek god country bumpkin"?

7. The strange reinforcement / idea of a person (Perse in this case) Only being allowed to be attracted to her future husband and not being allowed to have any other connections or meaningful relationships, or experience especially considering her first "romantic" relationship started off with her being SA while on the flipside Hades (despite being hated by the underworld denizens) has connections and meaningful relationships outside of Persephone. Persephone has a strained relationship with her mother and her roommate / has little to no friends. Hades had Minthe, Hecate, the underworld, his business And his brothers to rely on. (Persephone doesn't seem to have much of a life outside of Hades while the opposite is not true).

8. I'm genuinely asking here - what do hades and Persephone like about each other? (Aside from each other's bodies). Sexual attraction is a thing but does Hades even know basic things about Persephone? Like her goals in life or ambitions, he'll her favorite food or color? (And because we Know their fated to be together / will get married) - Does he bother to get to know her friends or her mother (in a non antagonist way)?? Does he support her in any other way that has no relation to him and his needs?

9. In the printed novel version theres an extra chapter that (I think) is supposed to be Heras introduction / birthday party and Hades and Minthe show up. Hera has a vision of Hades getting married when he hands her a coat and she seema awfully excited about it - but why would she be? The chapter states that she cant see whos under the veil and considering hes currently dating Minthe wouldn't it be fair to assume hes marrying Minthe in this vision? And with how much Hera despises Minthe why would she be excited for Hades to be married unless she was 100% certain who he was marrying was not her? Also why would she be excited about him getting married if at that point, they were still having an off and on again affair? It just seems to raise more questions honestly.

Analysis of Vesuvia :) Pt 4 Architecture!

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3A, Part 3B

*cracks knuckles* ok pals lets get going 

Also let me preface this by saying that I am not Muslim and I do not know a lot about Islamic culture or art (because we only spent a week on it in my art history class, which is a shame, and I couldn't afford my textbook cry) but I will try my best to put correct information that I have found all over the internet :)

This one I was waiting to do cause I find it the most interesting. But also while doing my initial research this one made me go HEY WAIT

When I was making the last 3 parts I noticed a common theme in the bgs specifically in the arches and domes

They dont look like traditional Italian domes or arches which makes sense since Vesuvia is said to also have middle eastern influences.

But what I found most interesting while researching the architecture in Venice, I learned that suprise surprise the Romans saw some art form they liked and copied it. 

Notably there are a lot of gothic influences in Venice.

Ex  The Ca' d'Oro or Palazzo Santa Sofia, that for some reason I could only find decent info about on Wikipedia which I was trying to avoid lmao

Lots of little “windows” minature arches, just a lot of extra. The thing about Gothic architecture is that its EXTRA, Vesuvia is just a little more tame.

But what I wanna focus on are the domes

So, domes were primarily a thing in the middle east, India, and the Mediterranean and ofc the Romans were like, I like that so they implemented it a lot into their architecture. Such as the Pantheon or their basilicas

So remember when I said the Romans took architecture from other places? Well yea one of those places was the middle east and more specifically, the Islamic Style of architecture. source that was hard to find for some gd reason

Because Rome sticks out in the Mediterranean it would make sense that trade occurred often especially with other territories so close by.

The Islamic style was input into Venice around 1300-1500, when the gothic style was very prominent, and so it influenced how Venice was designed aesthetically and structurally

In Islamic architecutre, specifically in Mosques theres a wide variety of styles depending on when it was built, but they all share common characteristics. One of which being a dome. Like I said I do not known a lot about Islamic culture so here is what Khan Academy says

“The interior decoration of a dome often emphasizes this symbolism, using intricate geometric, stellate, or vegetal motifs to create breathtaking patterns meant to awe and inspire. Some mosque types incorporate multiple domes into their architecture (as in the Ottoman Süleymaniye Mosque pictured at the top of the page), while others only feature one. In mosques with only a single dome, it is invariably found surmounting the qibla wall, the holiest section of the mosque.”

Source

And here's the mosque in question

Along with domes Islamic architecture also features a lot of arches, the Pointed and Ogee arch styles resemble the arches we see in Vesuvia in my opinion

Vesuvia’s arches are a little more dramatic✨ probably just for aesthetic purposes

Moving back to the domes they don’t exactly reflect European dome styles which are more half circular shaped, the domes in Vesuvia are more “onion shaped” as its called, such as the Taj Mahal, which is considered Indo-Islamic but thats besides the point

Here’s a nifty image I found labeling its parts for fun :) source

Some scholars believe that the Russian’s took inspiration from the middle east and also used the domes in their architecture, however based off what I’ve seen they're not as common in the middle east. Russians be loving their Onion domes I am not 100% sure on this I saw it on Wikipedia but ofc not a super reliable source and there were no citations on the page so apologies

But I feel that you could also argue that they are not onion domes but cupolas (not much difference but they don’t require a building to be on, they can be found on minarets and can be a little more dramatic with their shape), which like the onion dome originated in Islamic architecture, I feel theyre a better fit 

Along with Venice/Vesuvia having very Islamic looking architecture, the gothic style which is very prominent in Venice also takes inspiration from Islamic architecture as well

I think a great example we can look at is the Hagia Sophia, it was built as a Christian church in the 6th century, under the rule of Justinian I. Although it was built to be a Christian church, the Hagia Sophia resembles a Mosque like to the t

There are lots of domes, multiple layers, arches, and it even has the minarets (towers), on the four corners.

It now is housed as a Mosque today :)

I also find the column in the town square intersting, it has a very simple almost Corinthian shape but is also colored like middle eastern architecture typically is. Also the “capital” designs are usually at the top and not the bottom but it was probably the artist taking creative liberties :)

So while Vesuvia was designed with Venice in mind I would say it has very Indo-Islamic features, more so than Venice does. I also think it’s important to learn where styles originate from, especially when ancient Romans are praised for their architectural domes despite them being done before by other cultures

I was originally going to stop this series of posts here but I kinda want to do more about other parts of Vesuvia like the palace, the courtier estates etc and I can do other stories/worlds if you all want something like that :) 

I also wanna apologize for taking so long on this post even tho its kinda short, school is kicking my ass lmao

ok fuck it here we go

worst belmont: leon- i just dont care about lament of innocence lol. if my wife was turning into a vampire i would simply not kill her to power up a weapon

seventh best: juste- this pains me to put him this low bc i do like him and i absolutely love hod. i like his silly furniture collection its a very humanizing element. i just dont think hes all that interesting Narratively. hod is moreso maxims story imo

sixth best: trevor- hmm i find myself appreciating him a lot more than i used to lately? the cv3 gang as a whole is really good imo and i like the idea of him and sypha as a t4t couple... also bonding over how they were both kinda treated like shit until their skills were deemed useful... like trevor being exiled and then Asked To Come Back once he had a "use" has to feel somewhat dissonant to him. mostly i think hes made more interesting via the characters he allies with but i admit theres something there... i am a trevor enjoyer i would say, but there are just a lot of other belmonts i like more. he wouldbe way higher if i categorized him with the other cv3 protagonists though

fifth best: simon- in original cv he is a pretty standard action hero of sorts. HOWEVER most of my enjoyment is from his other game... cv2 is neat and has It Could Be That Deep vibes i think... i like how its kinda flipped with a belmont intending to resurrect drac for a sort of personal gain (curing himself of the curse) but its executed extremely differently from how richters arc was- richter is more of a tragedy whereas simon is a guy having to go to immense measures just to save himself in a kinda understandable way. he passes from town to town, always distant and never staying long, trying to outpace the quickly approaching death that awaits him. idk its just neat

fourth best: christopher (and also soleiyu)- its a shared position bc christopher is mostly interesting via his relationship to his son, but i think about them a lot... belmonts revenge has story potential. It Could Be That Deep. i think it's interesting that dracula was able to reappear so soon because christopher failed to kill him entirely the first time around, so i actually hc that christopher feels guilt that his son was probably targetted as a result of his mistake. soleiyu himself i think would feel a lot of Shame And Angst over the whole debacle since hes the first belmont to rlly bring shame to his family name and also hes 15 and rlly emotional lol. i have this whole narrative in my head about christopher and soleiyus relationship being really distant and fraught after belmonts revenge since theyre both so haunted and them eventually reconciling in the middle of a rainstorm or smth CHhfssfh. this is all headcanons and exists in my mind only but i think about belmonts revenge fairly often

third best belmont: julius- i was debating whether i liked him or christopher more but julius won me over by virtue of having actual dialogue lol and im sure if we ever got the 1999 game id like him even more... i like how his amnesia results in him realizing his role in the eternal struggle at the same time as soma realizing things about his past life as dracula its a cool parallel i posted about recently. he has a cool boss fight and is also rlly fun to play as in aria and he has cool gay uncle vibes

second best belmont: sonia- i just like her!! i think her backstory in the manuals is kinda interesting and i think she would be a good mom to trevor. i like her dialogue in legends a lot, and she deserved better than what she got. getting a game cancelled and being booted off of the canon timeline sucks man

number 1 best belmont: richter- i like how his whole character is like... you know that honorable family legacy this whole series has been building up? time to tear that shit down and show how it can absolutely destroy a guy. i like how in sotn he seeks to "make the battle last for eternity" because thats all this has ever been!! an eternal battle!! over the course of centuries!! hes like, the essence of Being a belmont turned up to 11 by shafts influences, and i could go on about The Greater Themes Of Cycles In Castlevania but i will not, but its very relevant to my reading of him... richters decision to give up the whip and take the belmonts into hiding after sotn (thus ending the cycle... and the belmonts we see in ooe right after this lead normal happy lives seperated from this idea of Being A Belmont its so interesting...) are smth i think about a lot... freeing his descendants from the same expectations that corrupted him... its Deep. and the post-sotn part of the timeline that ensues as a result of him staining the family name is my favorite era in the series. richter is awesome 😎

how do u handle ur social anxiety? ive been struggling a lot with it lately to the point ive sorta been breaking down and what better way for advice than to ask someone that comforts u (mun[?] too)

Mun... might have something more useful for you.

aesops way of coping is probably avoidance but we all know that aint the best way aha. anyway this was one ask i could not stop thinking about because i read it n went (john mulaney voice) Huh my anxiety never got so bad till a break down, n then it happened to me a few days later. i do find this funny yes

anyway, the most useful thing ive learnt to handle my social anxiety (not entirely tho but its a good start) is to identify which trains of thought is Social Anxiety tm speaking so u can immediately know those r lies. stuff like Oh they’re laughing at me just as I walk by, they’re laughing at me, or Someone else is here, they probably hate me, I should go somewhere else but I cant, aaaaaaaaaaaaa

(if im not wrong,) usually theyre statements that are along the lines of “they hate you” or “you’re wrong”, n they’re based off an irrational fear of others that can be countered using evidence or, well, logic and rationale. things like “No one is keeping a checklist of your mistakes, you’re literally the only one doing that and scrutinizing each one of them, others dont care so much about these things.” (ive found this to be a very good counterargument to use for a lot of situations so im bolding it) or “You wouldn’t think that if someone else messes up, it should be the same for them. And if they say it isnt a big deal, it probably isnt”. for me i usually keep repeating these more logical explanations n counterarguments to myself to kinda quell the social anxiety voice for a bit. i know there are cases that it doesnt work 100%, but its a good start

n if ur also like me who avoids eating/ getting food cos theres human interaction involved, i kinda try to get my friends to drag me out whenever possible. no shame, even a simple “hey lets drop by the convenience store later so i can grab a snack” is better than starving for like. a day or so. its also cos of this whenever i plan my schedule for the day, i see if i can plan it such that its convenient for me to get food for both lunch and dinner (sorry im not one for breakfast aha). n also i find that if i dont like the food (sorry im a very picky eater), i would rather starve than eat, so now im willing to pay a bit more for food i like n will eat

or just having someone else to talk to about these kinds of things, and kinda having a second opinion of “was that weird of me” or “should i have done that” with someone (ppl give advice better to others than to themselves aha) really helps, i think. u could probably also ask for advice maybe (like this? XD) ((after i had a small meltdown that day i went to my boyfriend’s to complain for an hour n honestly that helped me to release a lot of distressed energy n its better than stewing in it for the rest of the day + i got some advice that i slowly worked on when i was feeling up to it enough))

im also still kinda bad at small talk with strangers, especially ppl whom i just met. i find a small trick to this (that again does not work all the time) is to try to find a relevant topic (background is also fine i guess, depends on context), n as they answer find something about their answer that u can branch off into another topic. it could be a personal anecdote that is remotely related to that topic, it just gives u things to talk about aha (eg someone saw me drawing n commented that one of their friends also draws, n i started talking about how i used to get really bad grades in art class. which wasnt quite the topic but it worked). n when ur ending ur turn to talk, try to have something that the other person can comment on/ answer. having said that, this is hard if the other person is equally awkward/ doesnt give u much to branch off on from their replies (i mean they really only answer your question n rarely elaborates unless prompted. eg “what did you have for lunch?” “pasta.” “oh, what kind?” “carbonara.”). then i say its only as awkward as u make it to be, perhaps u would be better off kinda just sitting together in silence. its not weird unless u make it, n not every moment has to be filled with conversation.

thank u so much for this ask by the way, social anxiety is a huge bitch to have n it sucks extra much that a lot of our fears seem incredibly stupid from a “normal” point of view n we are constantly on edge even if we seem 101% fine cos we’re not fine aha. but just know ur not alone in this, n i hope some of these might have helped. 

i guess i should put some sort of disclaimer here, these r just some of my own personal problems n the solutions i have are mostly for me (maybe except for countering the thoughts), so i understand if they might not work for others. so i kinda recommend just sitting down, identifying which aspects social anxiety is affecting n finding a solution that works for u is kinda the best. try out different methods, if they dont work thats alright, if it does then thats great. it takes a lot of time, admittedly i starved myself for a couple of semesters before i found this solution for myself. it also take a lot of constant effort to counter, n to that i wish u all the best, n good luck in finding methods that work for u <3

I have an idea

-undercover mission based on sway by michael buble -so youve got three characters: A, B, C -A and B are forced to be partners -maybe they already know each other's behaviours -A isnt that excited to be on the field -A usually works behind the scenes -but it's a close-contact mission and they needed a face the enemy (C) hasnt seen before -So A is the one to go in, B controls the mission from their base or whatever idk -anyways -their mission is to gather information on C -what C is doing, who C talks to, and basically how they are a threat -the scene where everything goes down is your typical underground bar with jazz playing on a stage, the bartender is an old, skilled man who everyone respects (kinda like batman's alfred) -there's people in suits, coats and fedoras sitting at the tables, most of them smoking (totally not the mafia) - theres an open space in front of the stage, supposedly for dancing. -but that's where the daily target(s) sit tied up to a chair, usually already bleeding -by daily target i mean whoever that pissed off the mafia/gang/any corrupt organisation and is gonna die but theyre respected enough to be given an honourable death, ie. after a last meal, etc etc -A is stationed at the bar, drink in hand, doing well at keeping a low profile -Is trying to find C amongst the tables -is unsuccessful -bartender notices A is new, doesnt say anything. just nods at A like "i know you're not one of us but i'll still serve you. just dont start shit with the rest of the patrons and we good" -anyways A cant find C -at this point the band on stage changes the song -[sway starts here] -A tells B through comms that they cant find C -And what happens? -C appears next to A -"Now, now darling. If you wanted to see me all you had to do was ask." -Obviously A panics (their not comfortable on field remember?) -So B can here C through comms, and C knows -C tells B not to try anything, and that all they want is to have a conversation with A -A is stuck -B agrees, reluctantly of course -C is satisfied, and extremely smug as they ask A to remove their earpiece and hand it to them -C calls the bartender who promptly disposes of it -So now A is stuck with C -C takes A to a back room -"the acoustics sound so much better back here, doesnt it?"-C asks A for a dance -"just a dance, love. this song has such a wonderful beat; it'd be a shame not indulge in it." -A agrees, because what better excuse to get closer to the enemy? - (yeah right. A finds themselves to be entranced by C, they dont know why they feel so attracted to C) -So they dance -C leads, and starts a conversation -"why do you work for them? you could do so much better... with me." -and A really is stuck -Because on one hand, they like where they are -on the other, C makes a really good point -(or maybe they're just really attractive) -C twirls them around, and A follows. Its the way C can lead them around the room, and A can't help but lock eyes with C. A can't help but let themself relax in the arms that guide them into dips and twirls -"you seem to be enjoying yourself my dear, and we've only just met" -A is actually weak in the knees at this point -C twirls A away from them(C) , then pulls them(A) back close into their(C) chest. but when A is being pulled back, they fall into C's arms and is just pressed agains their chest. -A's face is heated and it is at this point we find out that A's drink was spiked with a drug -And as A almost passes out in C's arms -meanwhile B had burst into the bar, alone, like the overconfident dumbass they are -and is currently fighting a whole lot of people -C guides A out to see B -(B has been beaten up and is tied to a chair) -C has A leaning heavily on them -C asks A too look at B, gentle hands slowly bringing dazed eyes to focus on their bloodied partner trapped in a chair -"Cmon dear, do you really want someone like them to work with> someone who can't even take down a few measly goons?" -A looks completely out of it btw -but when they make eye contact with B, B has a sense that maybe A isn't

drugged enough to be completely unconscious of what's happening -A looks at B through half-lidded eyes -"I never wanted to work with such an imbecile in the first place" -A looks up at C, face heated, almost breahtless -"Please, please let me join you. I need to be by your side" -"Oh, my dear, no need to beg. you're already welcomed" -And so A has joined C - ' "you're already welcomed" ' A looks at the goons surrounding B -they look to A with respect, just like how they look at C -A realises they are waiting to be addressed. -"...Do with him as you wish..." -C carries A away as B gets fucking bodied by the mafia folk/gang people and the other goons -A has no regret -C has A all to themselves

and yes that was my idea, which turned out to be quite long lmao my bad.

@ 18: the questions weren't actually that strict! you could interpret them however you liked :) that said, im curious what you would add to the story? i love reading ur ideas and interpretations of the characters n stuff!

oh no prob, i did enjoy thinking of what i could change without adding anything new (i will talk too much if i dont contain myself) BUT since you have asked...

ill share these ideas as a general change to the series as a whole (WR and Acceleracers- also i will call Acceleracers AC for short if i need to).

There is a lot i feel needs to change- but two major points are lore (and direction of it in the story) and characters.

The lore of the series is all weird due to what changed between WR and AC, but its also too surface level. its for kids, its probably why its not so expansive. but it does leave a lot of confusion to me and while i would have to spend much more time to fully “rebuild” the world, i will give some ideas on what i would see changed.

One, at least making it make sense all the way through. i think Acceleracers had the best ideas but it shouldve been expanded on in WR- WR barely touched on actual Acceleron lore. Overall i would like to see the Accelerons 100% remade from the ground up. i LOVE aliens and alien society but i feel all we know of them is they race. and thats its. and sadly AC wasnt seen through to where we may have seen a bit more. but they need to be redone, with lore also point to exactly why the drones woke up when they did, what their drive is, etc. Why is Gelorum the way she is too, very important lor aside from characters. I wouldnt want the series to become a huge Lore Dump but there are moments where they intended to drop lore and they just. dont really do that, at least not well. Imagining the series with more extensive lore would obviously see it being longer than what it is, which i think makes sense. in the end if i was to properly write out all lore it would be a huge rebuild of 1) the Accelerons as an alien society, in depth 2) the full origins of the Drones/Gelorums (how they ended up where they did, what makes them how they are now and 3) a more cohesive plotting of events that would lead to lore revealed. also developing what “Scrim” and “clyp” were, along with the actual depth of Silencerz and how far back they go has been on my mind a lot. scrim and clyp just vanish from lore but in my headcanon backstory for Gelorum, i mention how those things existed too. if anyone has more specific questions on lore tho i can answer those individually! its just a lot to go over lol.

The characters though, oh god where do i start. not gonna touch on every individual (feel free to ask about someone and how i would rewrite them/change them), but theres a lot i would want to see different.

Theres some good ideas in the series that are just not explored much, or the actions dont feel like they have impacts. And many characters have literally zero backstory to go off of... Everyone needs at least some kinda origin in mind, doesnt have to be said but knowing where they come from is one key detail that i think is nice to drop some times. characters referncing locations, where they went, etc... its little but its good to have. In the WR comics, most of these characters do have origins! but theyre completely forgotten in the movies it seems. it would have been cool it WR tied together some of these ‘really good drivers’ and maybe they were in the same races together or something. there are 35 people and none of them seem to know each other at least not in detail- other than Vert and Alec who are clearly friends. Kurt Wylde was written to have done some “illegal” modifications in a race, what is someone there knew him? what if it brought up tension/suspicions? Things like that, its all part of where they come from and its a shame the movies just dont connect them very well.

I think theres some specific characters i will give examples to ‘rewrtiting’ and most of it is AC focused!

Kurt & Markie..... i love them, really do! but after WR i just did not like where they went. i get it, kinda ironic for Markie to become such an opposite. buuuut it was a bit much to me. first off, i would actually expand on the “crime” and that would 100% change the outcome of the two. the period between WR and AC shouldve gone different and in turn, i think wouldve changed up MM and Teku completely! i want to imagine Kurt is trying to get away from bad habits after WR but, perhaps has a really good deal with someone who had also gotten him into illegal car part business in the past. he is tempted and ropes Markie in with the idea they could do so more secretly but are caught, and while Markie is nervous and young he spills all the beans, but none of that evidence goes to Kurt and he stays silent, managing to get out of it. However instead of Kurt going to Teku and Markie going to MM.... Kurt tries to join Teku in the idea of joining a less rowdy gang, but Vert believes full Kurt let his brother take all the blame- so they dont allow him in. He goes for MM, which takes him easily but this team’s energy really doesnt help him. In turn, Markie leaves jail and Vert is swift to allow Markie into Teku because theyre friends! and it helps keep Markie in a better place, not wanting to get back into bad stuff. The important thing is tho, this switch up wouldnt result in super harcore, asshole Kurt. i feel like instead, he would be in an awkward place of wanting to improve himself but MM’s rebellious attitude coaxes him into worse attitudes. AND... very much an oppurtunity for Gelorum to manipulate him once more, as the accelechargers are much more important to acquire, with multiple, we’d loop back again. in the end though! i could imagine the story would still bring in the same scenario- Markie gets taken by drones, Kurt saves him, they rekindle and Kurt also comes to realize he shouldnt give in to the ways he used to practice.

i think for AC, in order to find more interest in the characters,  a switch up with the teams would be neat. Markie and Kur swapping was always on my mind, but i have thought about Teku!Taro. I think it would’ve been cool to throw in an background guy from WR into MM... like Harrison Lau. some more familiar faces would bring interesting dyanmics considering their backgrounds. and it think it wouldve fleshed out the teams a bit more in places they lacked.

Another thing i think is clear is there is lots of unexplored potential. Like dyanmics i express with Markie, characters like Lani, Karma, Tork, etc... oh there is so much i would add for them. Karma has a weird thing with being mentioned to look like Gelorum, and her prefectionism too but it was never touched on. What if it caused conflict? What if it made her question their morals? Or with Tork- i would honestly just rewrite how he tackles Tone’s death and the resolution, that whole thing in movie was weird and messy and made no sense to me imo. Lanu had something going for her but she felt so disconnected from the WR characters in AC, which is a shame! oh there are so many to go over lol. i hope to tackle some of these loose ends in the fics i have in mind but yeah... there is so much to say about changing these characters!!

not to be starting homestuck race disk horse in 2019 but yknow what? I Will.

being an asian fan in the hs fandom is kinda, not great actually. in fact, it not only feels like we’re not here at all, that we’re erased, but its honestly? downright harmful. people treat the trivialization and fetishization of your culture to be,,, like a Big Joak. yall joke about weebs like these people havent been literally grooming and abusing asian girls, like we havent been made fun of enough for Their actions, like we aren't already viewed as the strange punchlines to jokes that still seem somehow acceptable. its somehow funny to joke about how you hate every sign of asian culture that shows up throughout the comics, like how dirk’s kotatsu was dumb and pretentious as if people in japan dont literally live with one and use it every single day!

even asian-coding in characters get swept away in favour of other headcanons. even the megidos, who are as close to canonically asian as they possibly can be in a medium like homestuck, are often drawn white or something completely different altogether. the stridlondes are also heavily asian-coded, and the fans who do pick up on that, who finally feel comforted by someone like them as protagonists? they often just.. give up on that, because they see so little representation in the fandom. (theres only like one popular artist i know of that draws the strilondes asian? but like, hats off to u pal, youre fighting the good fight). also, it seems strange, to be represented so little considering almost 3 billion people on earth is asian, which is, Quite A Lot to be not represented a lot. dont get me wrong, i adore the outpouring of more diverse art of the kids, but a hard truth to swallow is that pocs being weebs/fetishizing asian culture, is just as harmful as white people doing the same. there is a world of difference between japanese dirk, trying to interface with his lost culture by clinging to the most performative and popular parts of it, than another dirk, appropriating people’s cultures because he thinks its funny or interesting based off a show he watched once. i love how people are like "wow the striders like anime and care about traditions and use japanese words and overall just seem like diaspora kids" and the conclusion they draw from that is "clearly,, they cannot be asian" bc a non-asian person being interested in those things is better than an asian person whose interested in their own culture i guess??

in fact, a lot of these narratives are so much more interesting once theyre looked at through their coded lenses!

Dave’s struggle with coming to terms with his emotions strikes such an interesting chord when the striders’ concept of irony and never showing their emotions Correspond so well to the idea of honour/face, where youre not supposed to show that youre Ever Sad or anything that isnt a positive emotion because it shows that youre a Failure and You Failed and that makes you a Bad Person, which is exactly what dave struggles with because hes So Guilty about it, which ties to the guilt and shame a lot of asian people feel about not being able to live up to impossible standards set by their parents, which is another theme we see reflected in all four strilondes. 

rose’s strained relations with her mother are mirrored in so many of our second-generation lives and makes so much more cultural sense when looked at that way. the weird distance you hold from your parents, where you cant look each other in the eyes anymore, because every interaction feels more like a business transaction. you hand in your good grades and praise from teachers, talking about how mature you are, and they return with some present or gift that you don't really want. you dont know anything about them, and they dont know anything about you, Not the person you Actually Are, anyways. but there is a yearning, to be close, to know eachother, but you only feel it in return when its too late. as well as her Obsession to be mature, to be smart and adult-like because thats what shes praised for, because you Need to be academically the best always and that means reading dictionaries until the sun goes down, repeating each word until they are engraved into your mind. always finding competition, subtle or not, because if you are not the winner, what are you?  dirk’s wild performative love of japanese culture (which also, in turn, lead to non-asian fans literally trashing it like it was a funny joke to call someone’s culture lame and stupid) seems like ‘ironic’ weebism, but its also being Exactly the type of over-the-too performative reclaiming of our culture that so many asian diaspora kids do when they’re teens! they feel bad about pushing away their culture as youth, but they’re not quite mature enough to actually care about the rich history and ‘boring’ parts, so they cling to pop culture, to social media and something so much more easily consumable, like anime. which is not even to mention the idea of him trying desperately to connect to a culture that he has never grown up in, but still belonged to by consuming mass amounts of media, being Such an immigrant story. as well as his massive competitive streak and need to make other people as good as he is (but not better), is the type of internalized pressure that a lot of asian kids feel as well. 

and all the stridlondes have various anxieties about not performing well enough, of not living up to a standard that they have set for themselves, feeling like even a single step back or even one mistake is a catastrophic failure that’s branded to you for life. Which is just as much of a mental health thing as it is like,,, an asian thing

this is getting really long so im cutting myself off here but please if you want to hear more about my Thoughts and Hot Takes feel free to shoot me an ask. 

in conclusion: please treat asian people better hs fandom i literally beg you. like,, im Not tryna make waves but,, asian erasure in fandom is a huge issue and no one ever talks abt it!! dont trivialize, fetishize and erase cultures blease  big thanks to @ernikerr and @wyndryga for encouraging me to go Off and helping to write this.

anyone please feel free to rb but non-asian people please watch your mouth

How did I find your blog? I was looking for soft Kuroo content on google. And your soft birthday hc’s for him came up. And that’s also how I found tumblr

What was the first story of yours that I read? That Kuroo piece ^

Roughly, how long have I been following this blog? Well I found that piece shortly after it was posted so…. Around the beginning of December 2019 I think. Got a tumblr a few months later and you were the first person I followed (had you in my bookmarks bar before that! (still have you in my bookmarks bar and when I share my screen in classes there are occasionally questions. I ignore them))

What’s something I’ve noticed about you personality wise? You’re really clever and funny. But you’re also sweet. But because you’re clever you have no hesitation in setting up and enforcing your boundaries, and I really admire that strength and confidence.

Have we ever interacted, either by PM, ask, or in the comments? What was my perception of you? YES!!! PM, SOOOOO many asks, comments, and you sent me an ask. And reblogged it. And I cried. A lot. My perception: you’re lovely and I want to h*ld your h*nd ….please.

What’s my favorite story of yours? Oh how to choose. Firstly, I’m a nb, biracial, bisexual. Honey, I’ve never made a choice in my life. But let’s try here. Anything you’ve written for Tsukki. Literally all of it is gold. Fight me. I was going to write “especially [piece title]” but I LITERALLY CANNOT CHOOSE ONE. Your Bokuto nightmare piece. Your Kuroo angsty fight. Your Tendou dealing with S/O with parents who yell piece. Your Kinktobers. Your Futakuchi and Mattsun pieces. And your Terushima pieces. Ugh. I CANNOT CHOOSE. OH AND YOUR STREAMER KENMA!!!!!! OKay just… all of it. I can’t choose. I tried, and I failed, and I’m willing to admit failure.

What’s a story I’d love to see you write? I don’t want to say this… because it hurts me… but I just KNOW you’d write brilliant angst. Some of my fav pieces of yours are pained beginnings with happy endings. That fight with Tsukki after a bad day at work. The pieces I mentioned above (nightmare pieces and fighting pieces and angsty home life ha.. ha.ha.ha.). That Oikawa one where the reader wakes up in bed without him and thinks he left. You write these gorgeous atmospheres and descriptive, visceral feelings, and if you chose to use it for evil…. You could get evil shit done. You’re SO powerful. So I want to read it… but also…. I don’t. I’d love to see you write ABO like you mentioned a while back or just see you explore a cutesy soulmate AU or something. I think you’d be really good at writing an AU where you hear what the other person’s listening too. I feel like you’d be so good at making me feel something for someone who was in another city. (think this would be cute with Tsukki cos he’s headphones boy, OR terushima because I like the dynamic of someone flirty, who clearly cares about looks, falling for someone he can’t see) ANYWAY….

Favorite pairing you write for?/fav reader insert? Tsukishima x reader. It’s my fav self-ship. (but also Mattsun, Bokuto, Oikawa, Tanaka, and Akaashi because you write them SO WELL!!!!)

Have any of your stories helped me through a hard time? Of course. Your self-harm piece came at a time I needed it. Iwaizumi’s in particular saved my life. But also your Tendou dealing with S/O parents who fight… came right when I needed it. Also starting college… was hard.. And reading and rereading your fluff really pulled me through it.

Have any of your stories hit closer to home? YES (see above).

Do I genuinely like your blog, it’s aesthetic or posts? It’s overall feel? It’s content? Yes. The aesthetic is, ngl, a wee bit basic. But I kinda love that. And the feel? It feels like home. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Your blog is my safe space. So, yes, I love. It’s content? YES. OF COURSE. Your personality probably could have kept me here even if your content was kinda shit, but I follow you RELIGIOUSLY because of your content. So yes. I adore.

Is English my first language? Kinda??? I grew up in a trilingual household so I kinda learned three languages at the same time while growing up. But no, I don’t need to translate it in my head. Because English was one of the three.

Anything I want to share? Yes. Please keep being kind to yourself, caring for your mental health, enforcing your boundaries, loving Akaashi, and just generally being you. You’re so lovely as you are, and I hope you continue grow, but never change. Also I’m sorry about all your work stuff…. It literally makes me feel sick. And I hope you find a job where that’s not tolerated, or that your work finds a better way of protecting it’s employees. I know you know this, but none of it is your fault. I just hope things improve. AND I love you… a lot. And I’m so proud of you hitting 9K and you deserve so many more followers because your pieces are just... GORGEOUS. I can’t wait until I’m at Barnes and Noble in a few years and I can pick up a hardback copy of your debut novel. I’m so excited to say “I knew Em Akaashi (which is your legal name as far as I’m concerned) before she was so popular among the masses.”

so ive been trying to figure out the correct and worthy way to reply to this ask since the moment i got it......because its so fucking sweet and kind and amazing and pure and perfect and i just dont know how to use WORDS to explain the way it makes me feel so.......i will just reply in bullet points in regards to every question u answered to make it a lil easier :D

- the fact that u found my blog on google ....... like this may be odd and a very specific thing but before i made this blog i always hoped that 1 day my fanfic would pop up in google searches bc thats ALWAYS how i found fics when i was reading them religiously and i felt so much ENVY!!!!! LIKE I WANTED TO BE THERE I WANTED MY FICS TO B POPULAR ENOUGH TO POP UP ON GOOGLE.....that may sound very selfish but its true......so thats just very cool to me... :]

- u’ve been here for so long omg 🥺🥺🥺🥺 if anyone in ur classes ever asks jus promo my blog like its nbd 

- thats so sweet what 🥺🥺🥺 i try my best to advocate for myself and be confident for myself.....ive spent far too much of my time being silently uncomfortable because i was afraid of pushing someone’s buttons seeming rude.....but NO MORE!!!! i know what upsets me, i know my triggers, i know what i dislike experiencing, and im never gonna let myself be anxious or uncomfortable for someone else’s sake, esp if theyre being rude 2 me. i would say its less strength and confidence and moreso me attempting to take control of my anxiety in the places i can (aka on the Internet) bc i am SICK OF ANXIETY ATTACKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

- BBY no dont CRY!!!! im racking my brain trying to think of who u are i wanna know so bad so i can thank u personally for being the kindest person in the world n so i can send u more asks >:(........MY HAND IS URS TO HOLD!!!!! dont tell akaashi tho 

- OMG my TSUKKI pieces.....hes so hard to write why ;-; thank u so much im so glad u enjoy my works<3333

- NOT ANGST NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!! pained beginnings to happy endings are my specialty.....IMAGINE me writing a sad ending like i CANT!!!!!!!!! ive only done it a few times and it is so Difficult.....YALL ARE SO LUCKY IM NOT EVIL!!!!!! ive had this idea for an angsty akaashi fic that i think about and write in my head every night before falling asleep and it Hurts and i wanna write it but i also can’t make myself :D ABO would be very fun but i genuinely do not know how to explore the concept while making it feel like it’s Written By Me.....u know what i mean? same with soulmate aus, i really dislike writing them because theyre just boring to me like they all feel the same everything’s been done for them.....which is FINE!!! but i write enough cliche stuff as it is HAHA, a long distance type soulmate au could be fun and interesting but ldr’s trigger me bc of a past relationship so </3 but hey maybe someone else could use the idea!!!!!

- gotta love tsukishima <3

- im rlly glad my writing could be there for you friend, one of the biggest reasons i write fanfic (and write the kind of fics i write) is bc i know firsthand how much reading sweet stories abt ur comfort characters can help u through the shittiest times - i just wanna offer ppl some support and happy feelings and love cuz sometimes fanfic is the only time we can find those things (and theres nothing shameful abt that either if anyone bullies u for reading fanfic i will fight them)

- I KNOW MY LAYOUT IS LAZY AND BASIC AS FUCK AND THAT IS BECAUSE I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT LMAOOOO so im glad u think its ok...... like i dont have the patience to create a fancy ass layout that actually works are u KIDDING ME??????? I COULD LITERALLY NEVER plus i kinda like that its just the basic kinda ugly boring default layout like it makes it simple and easy and i feel like it brings focus to the only thing on this blog that i care about which is my writing, i rlly only care about the content here and not aesthetics jdbljdabsdk that blue background will be there til i Die......i adore u more btw 

- WHOA trilingual what the hell ur so cool tell me more 

- you have my word, friend, that i will continue to do all of that so long as you do the same. take care of yourself, be kind to yourself - i know u can do it, ur so kind to others and u deserve to be kind to urself, too so this is the part that genuinely brought me to tears because *sappy dumb shit ahead* ok look ever since i can remember the one and only thing ive wanted to do with my life is become an author ...... dreams of book covers with my name written on them and words in pages written by me and fanart of my characters and going into my local bookstore n seeing my book there....these thoughts all haunt my fucking brain because i want it SO BAD!!!!!!!! so bad that it makes me CRY!!!!!!!! ive never wanted something more and just!!!!!!!!!!!! idk how much u meant that part but holy fuck!!!!!! i hope so bad that one day i can send u a free copy of my book as a thank u for being the person u are. u have all my love friend, every last bit of it <333333333

updated top albums list + recommended tracks from each bc im bored lol

*tentatively* in order

unnatural - wjsn | recommended songs: all of them (especially unnatural, supermoon, and yalla) except for rewind | skips: just rewind bc ballad /// im not sure what style to call this album but they really made such a smash, its crazy that it came out so early in the year and no gg is touching it (album wise). literally the only complaints i have are the obligatory ballad (that they always do bc they can all sing lmfao), the album cover/title (dont love the cover design and i dont love when the album name is the tt name, except in certain circumstances (a full album (especially where the title isnt necessarily from the title track) like montero) or when it's a single album (the inverse of this being rsq's prequel which couldve just been called colorfull since that was the only damn song 😐)). i also was disappointed with the outfits for last dance but that's peripheral.

timeabout, - yukika | recommended songs: insomnia & secret | skips: none /// okay to keep it very real im genuinely scared that she'll never surpass soul lady. i love, and i mean LOVE timeabout, but soul lady was on another plane of existence. like she could've held that album a little bit

the other side of the moon - gwsn | recommended songs: like it hot, starry night, i cant breathe | skips: i sing, depending on my mood /// i dont have much commentary tbh,this is just a very solid mini idk. id like to see a fusion of i cant breathe/tweaks/after the bloom/burn, maybe on their next mini. i love their brighter stuff but maybe a darker concept next (halloween cb pls pls pls)

montero - lil nas x | lowkey too soon for me to pick recommended songs but i'll say montero, scoop, lost in the citadel, sun goes down, and am i dreaming for now. will update! | skips: none /// i cant say that this is this year's sawayama bc sawayama was kinda more like a collection of really strong singles? whereas i feel like these songs shine as an album. i dont even know what to say except that im soooo surprised and impressed because i didnt know that this is the type of music he made???? like he raps but theres a lot of singing? not like belting but definitely not rapping. its kinda...alt ish? in some places? if i had to use ine genre to describe the whole album id probably say alt pop? idk but whatever it is it's definitely working

hide & seek - purple kiss | recommended songs: zombie & so why (tbh all of them) | 2am and zzzz depend on my mood but theyre def not full skips /// no bad song on the album this is crazy....i might rerank since i just listened to it for the first time but as of now idk, its good im just super impressed. ponzona wasnt for me but this cb theyre really doing all the things, lovr tht for them

produced by: [myself] - onlyoneof | recommended songs: coy & night flight | question mark depends on my mood /// im still mad at them (read: 8d) sooooo...idk. i can’t really listen to their music rn. but this mini is still good

play game: holiday - weeekly | recommended songs: check it out, weekend, holiday party | i like memories of summer rain and la luna but it depends on my mood /// very cohesive mini, def their best overall imo! not much to say, but i hope jiyoon gets well soon TTTT

enchant - orbit | recommended songs: gokurakuchouka & never gonna get away but also all of them except flor lunar | skips: flor lunar is nice but boring /// i need kpoppies to get into it im tired of being here alone cmon y’all

set - woodz | recommended songs: feel like | skips: none /// i prefer his bright tracks but this mini was solid as usual. where is the full album tho seungyoun hmmm????

guess who - itzy | recommended songs: sorry not sorry, tennis (0:0), kidding me | skips: in the morning, occasionally wild wild west /// i remember being very surprised that i liked this album, especially given that i dont like mitm. not anything groundbreaking but still solid. i think the naming of tennis (0:0) was really clever

intersection: trace - bae173 | recommended songs: green light, loved you | skips: none (sometimes the intro tho) /// honestly their music is really good??? mbk just hasn’t promoted them well, i feel like they make it a little hard to stan...i really appreciate that they’re not doing the stereotypical hard bg concept thing

lilac - iu | recommended songs: coin, flu, ah puh, troll | skips: honestly id have to relisten, some of the songs a lil boring but idr them at the moment

hello future - nct dream | recommended songs: hello future, life is still going on | skips: idr tbh, probably hot sauce though //// was very surprised that i liked this album, but the outro of hello future really got me after a few listens so i had to check it out. very decent!

killa - mirae | recommended songs: killa, sweet dreams, 1 thing | skips: none really but all of the bsides are a little mid tbh /// i will be 1000% honest in saying that the three reasons this allbum made this list are 1.) killa (the tt), 2.) none of the songs are bad, 3.) lien’s vocals. something about lien....he really just sells whatever song he’s on. his belting >>>>>>>>>>>. he makes their music very enjoyable to listen to, next in that department would be junhyuk. based on their most recent cb, siyoung and khael also contribute a lot as well. shame that the rest of the cb album kinda does nothing for me idk. random but i would really like a gg to cover higher and/or killa

& - loona | recommended songs: ur, ptt | skips: a different night, dance on my own /// these r my girls but this is not their best. ur is wonderful though, and ptt is addicting somehow. wow and be honest are fine but really not their best. i like wow’s choreo tho! 

albums im excited to listen to (no particular order):

last year was weird volume 3, tkay maidza (i’ve already listened to a bunch of it but i need to sit and just listen to the whole thing)

troubled paradise, slayyter (same as above, but i didn’t even realize it came out this year, i thought it was old for some reason lol)

jo1, challenger (every song of theirs i hear i like pretty much so i need to take an organized look at them lmfao)

jo1, stranger (same as above)

only lovers left, woodz (duhhh its woodz. not out yet but im excited! i do prefer his brighter concepts and this def isn’t that. he says its not gonna be like what he’s done before but the title and concept photo that’s out rn is giving lift up)

the book of us: negentropy - chaos swallowed up in love, day6 (the title kinda bored me but we’ll see. also sungjin’s gone so.....................we’ll see.)

ancient dreams in a modern land, marina (i barely got past venus fly trap because its soooooo good. i’ve listened to a little after that but the songs i heard didn’t really compare. i have to give it a shot tho)

the chaos chapter: fight or escape, txt (i liked the blue hour mini so i need to give them a chance i suppose)

333, tinashe (i just feel like i should idk)

honorable mentions (no particular order):

blue hour, txt - discovered this year, came out last year. retroactively makes the 2020 albums list bc whew the market research that went into that thing paid off

hula hoop/ starseed ~kakusei~, loona (why tf does the album not have a name) - duhhh loona + synths = a smash. in fact like i said when it dropped i dont even wanna call them loona anymore. this is kongetsu no shoujo!!! this isn’t on my top albums list because im counting as two songs and my limit is 3. i might add it anyways lmfao. we’ll see

ugly beauty, jolin tsai - discovered this year, came out in 2018. i just really like jolin tsai idk. i had only heard that album w play and i’m not yours, both are iconic but the production quality sounds...low? like its older but ik they’re not *that* old. either way, ugly beauty does everything i wanted it to - dramatic, vocals, rapping, boa vibes...jolin tsai is a queen what can i say

also, there are of course a ton of singles that i love as well, this is albums only though lmfao. i have no idea if i could even attempt to organize the singles lol

FELIX BI ANON HERE AND I AM ABSOLUTELY ROLLING your reaction made me laugh way too hard omg. ok if you'd been a stay for a while it's an ongoing gag that every australian knows a guy who knows a guy who knows felix. we dont know if Half the shit is true or not (i have some... Very Interesting claims i've heard, but never directly from the people who knew him themselves... i do believe them tho, knowing him and his predebut pics lmAOOo) but like just abt every aussie stay knows someone at this point, so yeah it Is just your average tuesday here LMAO

abt me meeting him, it was when they came here to australia! i went to their concert and got vip tickets so we got to do the high-touch at the end, but it all happened so fast its kinda blurry. its like my brain just Cant Comprehend the beauty of those fine ass men up close so its just. a muddled blur. but it was hands down one of the best nights of my life, i managed to make our lixie laugh at the Dumbest joke known to man (dont ask im embarrassed) but its been two years and my soul hasnt returned to my body yet. that man's laugh? i want it tattooed inside my eardrums, please and thanks.

I DO NOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME REMEMBER HOW THEY SMELLED IM SORRY my nose is Very Bad i cannot smell things unless theyre like 2cm away from my nose and the whole arena kinda just smelled like sweat bc they set up the hi touch where the mosh pit was beforehand. i will give the insider stay knowledge tho that chris's cologne i believe is called eros or some shit? idr but ik its like $80 and according to the ppl whove sampled it, smells like "liquid heterosexuality." ill have to dig if u want me to find the exact cologne. ON THE OTHER HAND MINHO USES STRAIGHT UP FUCKING FEBREEZE which honestly just says plenty abt those two.

god i talk a lot i dont apologise tho bc theres more where that came from. anyway ur mum calling skz "our boys" is so precious and its hilarious that she roasts you like that LOL but pls. there are no bootleg felixs or chans to be found here. they were one of a kind, aussie blokes are... something else, in the most neutral sense of the word. either they're off the shits completely but its funny and theyre always down for a drink and a chat, or they WILL make you want to commit homicide but i suppose thats just men in general. they dont make men like chanlix no more and im upset abt it!! i aint living no fantasy i just went to [1] concert and my dumb ass bitch ass pea brain ass crusty motherfucker ass of a mind can barely remember. its tragic. im just waiting for them to come back for a take 2.

FIRST OF ALL BESTIE IF YOU DONT SPILL THOSE QUESTIONABLE LOCAL FELIX RUMORS...... like I need to know if any of my personal crackhead thoughts and impressions regarding The Felix™ are represented. Esp because I feel like every aussie bitch ever I ever encountered is the funniest bitch I ever met without even trying, like funny in a way I can't even put into words, yall just talk and I LIVE for it, I don't even need to know half of what the fuck yall talkin bout or get any of the references, I'm living from start to finish

Also I literally CRY thinking of Chan wearing Eros because I s2g at my last job I used to go downstairs to the men's cologne counter just to waste time and stare at the Resident Hot Lesbian and BRUHHHH...... All Versace scents are questionable cause they all smell like the morning after a Hot Girl Summer type excursion, that one night stand walk of shame didn't even make him wear a rubber type beat, you know? 😂 And Eros is very much That™ so like thinking of Chan wearing it is just like HOLD ON... WHEN DID THIS BECOME A WHORE HOUSE jduehajshdjajshdjsjsge 🤣 NO SHADE NO SHADE 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

The REAL shade of it all is that my motha even daring to make that comment is just... So pointed, because she KNOWS that even with the most busted, crusted, dusted, bootleg dreamworks DVD in a cracked jewel case type of knockoff counterfeit "if you squint real hard there's a resemblance I swear" type Bang Chan impersonator, the closest I could EVA get is thrown his discombobulated ass in the trunk of my car after giving him a throat-chop to discombobulate him, she KNOWS this, so it was RUUUUUUDE 😭😭😭

And but like I deadass live solely for the rare lil glimpse of the boys un-whitewashed..... It is my brains whole ass source of both dopamine and seratonin.......... they are obvi gorgeous literally any way but when you get to see their real skintones irl, melanin checked in and present, ugh it's just like (incomprehensible screeching) you know? They're literally perfect as is. I know it's a way more complicated issue than I could even begin to try to understand and I won't even attempt to speak on it, but sometimes I'm sad at how whitewashed they are in a lot of photos cause it's just like, you can't improve perfection, in my eyes at least, you know? Like the Cleo promos I just wanted to hurl a bottle of Lancome waterproof makeup remover like it was a molotov cocktail 😭 and the way they CLEARLY tried to contour Chan's nose to make it thinner n shit, oh bitch I was HEATED, I was like LEAVE HIS NOSE TF ALONE???? ITS LITERALLY PERFECT???? He doesn't need to have a thin crispy lil eurocentric button nose to be beautiful, god fuckin damn, leave that man be. They do look hellllllaaaaaaaaa pretty in every makeup look tho 😳 Ive been saying since my scene kid days, if men learned how to do makeup and have fun w it and respect it as an art form maybe they'd get more of the attention they want from women 🙊 OH and I absolutely fucking died when Felix was saying he wants to learn how to do makeup 🥺 my lil former makeup artist heart was JUMPIN, I was like BRUH I AM RIGHT HERE?????? I AM RIGHT HERE. RETURN MY CALLS SIR AND I WILL GIVE YOU WHOLE ASS TUTORIALS, DONT PLAY 😩 UGH I literally fantasize about doing some really avante garde makeup on Felix, his face is just so visually stunning but also dynamic, he has a perfect face for artistic, eccentric makeup looks, I would die to put him in some crazy early 2000's Galliano for Dior makeup looks. Or just anything where I could paint all his lil freckles like stars with the eye look reminiscent of clouds and the sky............ Since he did say "is anyone gonna have the whole universe in their eyes?" and then didn't wait for an answer 😪