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novelmonger · 1 year

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I watched every* Northanger Abbey adaptation so you don't have to

*Does not include written, audio, or theatrical adaptations. Excludes works that are merely "inspired by" Northanger Abbey, but not actual adaptations. Also I didn't watch the Spanish TV movie, because I wouldn't be able to understand it anyway.

Northanger Abbey (1987) starring Katharine Schlesinger and Peter Firth

Reasonably faithful adaptation (if you don't count the soundtrack, which sometimes veers into very '80s territory with saxophone and...was that an electric guitar?)

While all the actors are decent enough, none of them have a smidge of chemistry with each other.

Props for showing bits of 19th-century life we don't normally see in such adaptations, e.g. sedan chairs and the actual public bath of Bath (which seems to be more-or-less historically accurate?)

Everything feels rushed and smushed together, which is ironic because it's actually a couple minutes longer than the 2007 movie, which doesn't suffer from the same problem.

Absolutely terrible casting. Peter Firth was nowhere near charming and witty enough to be Henry Tilney, even if he is the only one out of all these versions to actually get to say his best line (the "intolerably stupid" one) in full. He comes across as such a serious, judgmental man that it's hard to understand what Catherine sees in him. And Robert Hardy is an excellent actor, but completely the wrong choice for General Tilney. He looks far too jolly, and works much better as Sir John in Sense and Sensibility, or even Cornelius Fudge in Harry Potter.

Kudos to them for finding a Katharine to play Catherine.

Wishbone s02 ep09 "Pup Fiction" (1997)

Obviously very truncated because they had to fit it into a half-hour children's show with a real-world framing story

They basically cut out all the marriage drama stuff and focus more on not letting your imagination run away with you.

Whether you enjoy it or not will mostly depend on whether you like Wishbone in general. (Personally, I'm ambivalent.)

Northanger Abbey (2007) starring Felicity Jones and J.J. Feild

The most watchable version (best acting, production value, faithfulness of adaptation, etc.)

Felicity Jones is perhaps "too pretty" to be Catherine, who is supposed to be rather plain, but she's very easy on the eyes and does an excellent job at portraying Catherine's wide-eyed wonder and naivety.

J.J. Feild is the perfect Henry Tilney. Suave, charming, with a cheerful twinkle in his eye as often as not, it's so clear to see why Catherine falls for him, as well as why he becomes so attracted to her way of assuming the best of everyone. Alas, he doesn't get to say the wonderful line about those who don't read novels being "intolerably stupid," but he shines in all the scenes where he teases Catherine. I also think he did the best job at portraying the gentleness mixed in with the anger when he rebukes her for assuming the worst of his father.

Excellent casting for most, if not all, of the supporting characters. Liam Cunningham makes for a very intimidating General Tilney, William Beck is exactly what John Thorpe should be, and Carey Mulligan, though I will always see her first as Ada Clare from Bleak House, was the perfect choice for Isabella.

The biggest downside to this adaptation is that some of Catherine's dreams and imaginings are rather sexual in tone. If memory serves, she even has a dream where we see her from behind, standing completely naked in front of a man. It's unnecessary and adds a strange sort of voyeuristic note to the movie that I didn't appreciate.

We get to see more of Catherine's siblings, which is very fun.

Does the best job at capturing the satirical tone of the novel, mostly through music and the narrator

Northbound webseries (2015-2016) by Oh For Cute! Productions

Of the two (yes, two) modern-day adaptations on YouTube, I think this one did the best job at capturing the essence of the novel. It's set forth as the vlog of Catherine Morland, a girl heading out from Fullerton, Virginia, to New York City. Instead of Northanger Abbey, she goes to North College in NYC, where she meets Henry and Eleanor, then finds out that their father is a history professor, and decides to take a class from him.

All the videos are fairly short, so it's kind of impressive how easily a coherent story can be told through them. Due to the format of the series and it being an indie production, the audio/video quality is fairly low and the actors aren't exactly Hollywood-tier (some better than others). But it kind of lends a sense of authenticity to the series, like it really is just a vlog by some random girl relating her adventures in New York.

Catherine is cute and pretty, but in a normalish sort of way that I think is very fitting for her character. She's very relatable. I wasn't sure about Henry at first, but he has a certain "dashing heartthrob" quality about him, and a great sense of humor, that are very fitting for the character. A lot of the characters are very relatable or feel like people I've met in real life, especially because of the modern setting.

Worth noting: In this adaptation, James Morland is Jamie Morland, Catherine's sister. She still has a romance with Isabella, and has much more of a presence in the story than James does in the original.

Oh my gosh the modern-day version of John Thorpe is so creepy and ick. It put the character in perspective so well for a modern audience, more so than scenes of him tearing through the streets in his fancy carriage or whatever. Like...I knew a guy in college exactly like him, though thankfully his attentions weren't turned on me *shudder*

The chemistry was really good between all the actors, so even when some of the lines felt a little too scripted, it was super believable that these people would be friends (or what have you).

I absolutely 100% want to be in Catherine's friend group (after the end, when the Thorpes are no longer around). They're all such lovely people, and seem fun to hang around.

The Cate Morland Chronicles webseries (2016) by Apple Juice Productions

Unlike Northbound, this one has Catherine in her twenties, trying to figure out how to be an adult while also being a huge nerd. Cate is running a vlog, but it's a bit more "official," because she runs a fan blog for, among other things, the cult classic TV show The Mysteries of Udolpho. She gets a job as a journalist, and continues the vlog for work. Shortly after she gets her new job, she has the opportunity to interview Henry Tilney, the actor for one of the lead roles in Udolpho. They're immediately and obviously attracted to each other, and the story evolves from there.

The setup for this series was much less relatable than Northbound, even though the characters talk about various fandoms (real as well as the fictional Udolpho show). I mean, many of us have gone through struggles like the Northbound Catherine, trying to find our way as adults and as college students. But how many of us have been journalists who have the chance to interview our teenage movie crush? And then fall in love with them for real? And end up in a relationship with them? And have it all captured on video and put up on YouTube for the world to see? It broke my suspension of disbelief more than once in that respect.

While the camera and mic quality was better than Northbound, the Cate Morland Chronicles generally seemed to have a lower quality of actors. Cate was probably the best, and Henry was pretty good too. But a lot of the supporting actors just didn't feel natural - especially James and Eleanor, I thought. It was like the difference between a high school play and a college play.

Probably as a result of the acting itself not being the best, a lot of times the chemistry between characters suffered. This was especially a problem between Cate and Henry. There were a lot of videos where I found it hard to buy that they were falling in love. The best ones by far were the road trip videos.

Oh yeah, and they had Henry and Eleanor not be siblings for some reason? She's his publicist instead. And yet they're super close, so that Eleanor can go along to Henry's house with him and Cate, and so they can preserve that fake-out moment when Cate first meets her and thinks Eleanor is Henry's girlfriend or something. So they had to have this whole thing where Eleanor explains that they have a brother-sister relationship, when everything would have been so much easier to explain if they'd just...actually been siblings, like they are in the original.

This is more subjective, but I found Cate to be kind of annoying at times. I just found her to be less likeable than the Northbound Catherine, kind of exhausting actually. I think she had a bit too strong of a personality to be Catherine Morland. To put it in Northanger Abbey terms, she actually seems to be perfectly set up to be the heroine.

Hopefully this information will help you decide which, if any, adaptations you want to pursue yourself.

#northanger abbey #adaptations #clearly my faves were the 2007 movie and northbound #despite their flaws i think those ones captured the spirit of the book best #i should probably mention i was predisposed to like the 2007 movie because jj feild was in captain america: the first avenger #not sure why i did this little project honestly #northanger abbey is my second-favorite austen novel after p&p #but everyone seems to ignore it #so i guess there were few enough adaptations that it wasn't too daunting of a task #i really wanted to assess audio versions of it as well #but the one i'm most interested in (the radio drama with emma thompson) is only available on audible :(

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b1rds3ye · 9 months

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Mask On

How the boys react to their new ally who is more adamant on wearing their mask than Ghost himself.

Characters: Captain John Price, Simon “Ghost” Riley, Johnny “Soap” MacTavish, Kyle “Gaz” Garrick

GN!Reader w/ no physical descriptions (except shorter than Ghost)

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 3.1 (~0.8 each)

Warning: Canon-Typical Violence, Mentions of Reader potentially having insecurities, Not Proof Read

A/N: You know what maybe I want to be the badass masked character 😤

Captain John Price

The captain is thorough, and he immediately knew something was up when he looked up your file only to be greeted with no photo. He’s honestly a little peeved that his rank doesn’t grant him this confidential information, he’s known Simon before he took up the mask so this is the first time he’s genuinely had a faceless ally

But ultimately, as long as he can trust that you’ll be following orders, he doesn’t care if you have a mask or not. But his concern is only that for a fellow soldier

It takes a little longer for him to warm up to you - facial expressions tell a lot about someone’s character. He’s a bit prickly around you, he learns about you indirectly with how you interact with the rest of the 141

But over time there’s a shift. He can’t pinpoint when exactly but the sight of your mask relaxes him. After days separated on a mission, high stakes and adrenaline has Price snapping his head at the faintest of foreign sounds. But upon the familiar sight of your signature mask, he feels at ease

Price is fiercely protective of you and your mask. He likens it to his hat, only far more important - that mask is part of your identity and he knows just how important a soldier’s psyche is. If the enemy manages to take off your mask, he’ll stop at nothing to get it back on your behalf, even if you reluctantly tell him to abandon it

If he can’t salvage your mask, Price has now made it a habit to carry a balaclava for you in one of his pockets. If that’s not available, he’ll even offer you his hat, tipping it down far enough to obscure your eyes

Off duty he finds himself staring at your visage more these days. Looking at how the mask curves over your features, or the small slivers of skin that reveal themselves. He catches himself before you notice but he’s still disappointed in himself, he feels like a Victorian-era prude hyperventilating at the sight of an ankle

“Looking fresh, sergeant.”

You let out an audible chortle at Price’s words. The last mission was a success but at great costs, one of them being your mask damaged beyond repair during melee combat. Your face still wasn’t revealed, but slashes against fabric embedded with dirt and ash have made your signature mask look unrecognisable. Immediately upon returning to base and after debriefing, you were out of commission until you could don a new mask.

Price would be lying if said he didn’t miss your presence for the last few days, hiding away from the rest of the soldiers in base. He has no doubt you’ve still maintained your training and visiting the infirmary for mandatory checkups, but he’s gotten far too used to you being at his beck and call. The famed sight of your mask is no longer in his periphery, giving a nod of approval (not that he ever needed your approval, but he does enjoy your attention).

And now here you are with a new mask, the highlights glowing under the overhead lights and the darks swallowing up the lightwaves like an animal starved. Your updated look had you noticeably confident, shoulders square and head tall.

“Thanks, Captain.”

He can hear your smile and he ends up sitting next to you. Did he need to sit so close? No, but he acts as though his thigh brushing against yours was pure coincidence.

“What are you going to do with the old one?”

“I don’t know,” you shrug, giving a light pat to a pocket in your cargo pants that your past mask currently resides in. “I know there’s a lot of memories in this… it’s my first mask… but I don’t know what to do with it.”

“I’ll keep it.”

You look at him. Price now has the uncanny ability to read your mood purely through your body language. From the speed at which you turn your head, the inclination of the neck, how your shoulders slant, he’s surprised that such a vicious soldier can act so endearingly in these moments.

“For what?”

“Safekeeping,” he says simply. “I’m proud of my soldiers, sergeant - want to remember their accomplishments.”

You shrug in agreement and fish your mask out of your pocket. You don’t need to know how much Price truly values you, how having your mask will be like having a part of you by his side to motivate him when he’s working alone.

Simon “Ghost” Riley

You’ve got a mask? Cool, so does he. Simon really doesn’t care when he first met you. He offers a simple nod of acknowledgement to you and then it’s all mission talk. If anything, the mask makes him respect you more, like him it’s always the masked ones who’ve seen shit and can get shit done

Even before you two became friends, you two were often paired together for operations. Perhaps it was just assumed the two masked people were on the same wavelength and to be fair, they were right. It didn’t take long for Ghost to admire your prowess on the battlefield

However as the two of you start to get closer, Simon gets a bit of a eureka moment. So this is how all his allies feel when trying to get along with a masked figure, unable to see any of their expressions. Oh how the tables have turned. It’s not daunting for him, more just amusing

He knows the struggles of having a mask so he helps out where he can. He reminds you if it’s been some time since you last washed your mask (advice he does not follow himself) and he’ll offer you some of his obsidian powder he uses to obscure any uncovered patches of skin

Price often has the two of you accompany him for interrogations, he calls it “mask pressure”. There’s nothing more terrifying to a target than having two imposing faceless figures standing on either side of them, unreadable and unpredictable

It’s clear you don’t want to show your face to anyone and Simon doesn’t question it. His natural curiosity is not worth your discomfort and he makes that abundantly clear. If on the rare occasion you catch him without a mask, he’ll sometimes put it back on so that you don’t have to be the only one with their face covered

If your mask is ever compromised, Simon covers you with his hulking figure. No one dares get on the bad side of Ghost who shoots the most terrifying glares towards anyone looking in his - and consequently your - way. He stands in front of you, back rigid and shoulders square, his posture only slacking if he feels you hold onto his back, seeking comfort

A few weeks ago, when left in a briefing, you finally noticed Simon was staring at you from across the room. He had been staring for a good while now, but you - ever the diligent soldier - were distracted discussing tactics with a corporal. So there he was, standing and observing in the corner of the room - his “observing” being drinking the sight of you. And that was when he noticed, among all the glory that was you, that your mask was slightly off alignment. Cue his eyes being trained on your head for you to get the idea that something was wrong.

When your head stayed still - probably challenging his gaze - he tried to change tactics. He added the occasional upward jerk of the head - miming an attempt to shake the mask back in place - but your head only tilted in confusion. You still could not figure out what he was doing.

Eventually he gave up and walked up to you. He lifted a tentative hand, silently asking for permission and you nodded. He pinched at the fabric on the side of your face.

“Your mask’s slippin’,” he said gruffly. It wasn’t the end of the world, only a small adjustment that only someone as observant as him could notice. Still, he felt satisfied at your heavy exhale, you must’ve noticed it’s a little easier to breathe with everything in alignment now.

“Thanks.”

Today, Simon finds your gaze trained on him, head following whenever he moves across the room. You used to stare when you first met, you probably found him intimidating and he doesn’t blame you. He thought you’d be over that though, you two were closer than that. At least he hoped.

“Penny for your thoughts?” He eventually asks and that spurs you into action.

Standing in front of him, you reach up, your hand grabbing the top half of the skull that overlays his balaclava. Your thumb lightly hooks into the skull’s eye socket - a little close to Simon’s actual eye but he trusts you. He feels you tug upwards, and Simon now realises that the skull had been sinking down his face, the peripheral around his brow no longer obscured. He’ll need to reapply the glue for the mask later.

“We really need a hand sign for this,” you mutter.

And so you two make one. It’s discreet, a closed fist with a thumb poking out, dragged from the jawline up to the hairline. The rest of the 141 just look at the two of you in confusion whenever you use it though, your little secret.

Johnny “Soap” MacTavish

Johnny’s generally a good judge of character. Although it’s a little uncanny being unable to see your features, he’s used to it because of Simon. One conversation is all he needs to reach a conclusion as to what type of person you are and now he treats you as if you’re good friends

Yes, he is curious about what you look like under the mask. He used to make comments about it occasionally until he caught you on a bad day

“C’mon Sarge, just a peek.” “Not happening, Johnny.” “What, you ugly?” “… that’s not for you to speculate, MacTavish.” “Shit, sorry. I- I’d never think that of you, or care. I know you’re a looker.”

And Johnny stands by his statement. Even if he’s never seen your face he quickly developed a little crush on you. How you conduct yourself in battle has him watching you with stars in his eyes and he just knows you’ll take his breath away if you ever show your face

When Johnny’s bored, he likes doodling your mask and potential alternative designs in his journal which he’ll show you sometimes. He’s not an artist but he gets the idea across. He’s created a “happy” design, an “angry” one, and the “when I see Soap” design which is just your standard mask with a whole lot of shoddily drawn love hearts on it (you haven't seen that design yet)

He’s genuinely surprised at how determined you are at keeping your mask on in all circumstances - you’re worse than Simon at this point - but he’ll never ask because he doesn’t want to potentially open up old wounds. Despite his curiosity for what you could look like, Johnny will never invade your privacy and ensures no one else does either. If you’re in your room he’ll knock once, twice, thrice, until he’s absolutely sure you’re ready for him to enter

If something goes wrong and your mask falls off he’s looking away and shoving everyone else to look away as well. He’s like a guard dog, shouting and name-shaming anyone who dares look in your direction. No one except other members of the 141 will be able to approach you until you’re covered

Was it smart to have you and Soap - combined to be the most disruptive and obnoxious soldiers on the field - alone to handle a stealth mission that was off the books? No, but you sure as hell weren’t going to disappoint Price or Laswell. The objective was clear and the rules of engagement were even clearer; under no circumstance can the enemy know you’re from 141.

“We’re gonna need to cover our faces,” Johnny mutters absentmindedly beside you. You pull your binoculars down to send him an incredulous look and he chuckles. “I need to cover my face.”

“You got a mask?”

There’s a pause and Johnny’s looking at you, eyes glinting in that familiar mischief. That was never good news.

“You bet.”

You offer a tentative nod of encouragement before lifting your binoculars back up to observe the target site. You hear the repeated shuffles of fabric against fabric and clothes sliding against skin. It’s prolonged, you swear it’s enough time for Johnny to change his entire uniform. His breaths become muted, mouth now covered until it eventually falls to complete silence. It’s unnerving, the designated demolitions expert is not known for his silence, and you have to look back at him yet again.

Of course you expected Johnny to be wearing a mask, but it was the mask itself that took you by surprise.

“Is that… mine?”

“Was yours.”

You squint and somewhere in the depths of your mind, you vaguely recall Soap asking if he could have one of your spare masks back at the base. You humoured him, and said your wardrobe was his.

That was your first mistake.

You figured he was just going to take the piss, wear your mask to scare some privates around the base. You didn’t think he’d actually wear it on a mission. It was unexpected, but it felt like an honour. How he was so willing to identify with you in some of the most dangerous of situations.

But your silence has Johnny getting fidgety. He’s already reaching up to pull the mask off.

“I have a normal balaclava. If you don’t like this I can-”

“Wear it.”

You can’t see Johnny’s face but you see him pull his head back in surprise. Then he smiles, one so wide, expanding his cheeks you can see it stretch your mask. In that moment you’re glad your mask obscures your features as you feel yourself grin at his own joy.

“We’re a team, aye?”

“You bet.”

Kyle “Gaz” Garrick

Kyle’s may be close to Simon but he's not entirely used to masked allies. When you first arrived he shot Captain Price a cautious look, a silent conversation between them finished by Price’s definitive nod. Eventually he relents and puts up with you

Subconsciously, without seeing your face he ends up reducing you to a weapon. He respects you like a soldier, a robot. His language is restrained, only issuing orders and you recite them back

It’s only when another soldier cracks a joke on the mission and you laugh does it flick a switch in Kyle’s mind. You weren’t all orders, you weren’t a machine, you were a human (with a damn nice voice might he add). He feels terrible for reducing you to a tool simply because he can’t see your face but he’ll make up for it now

He becomes a bit of a menace in the sparse quiet moments of a mission. He makes the occasional one liner about how you wear the mask so others aren’t distracted by your good looks, but then changes the topic so quickly you’re not even sure he said it

Yes, Kyle’s a little obsessed with your voice. He can’t see you and he doesn’t have the experience like Price or Simon to read body language accurately. Instead, he can read your mood near perfectly with the inflections in your voice (which is arguably more impressive). While he doesn’t want you to ever be upset or angry, sometimes how you taunt the enemy has a shiver running down his spine

Because your mouth is blocked by a mask, many allies don’t offer you food or drinks. Not Kyle though, if he’s grabbed refreshments, he always ensures he has extra for you. At first he just gives them to you and then leaves. But when you said it was okay for him to stay - trusting him enough to just look away when you lift you mask - Kyle’s heart soared

If anything happens to reveal your face, Kyle is immediately by your side. He pulls you close to provide comfort, while also guiding your head into his neck or shoulder to block anyone from seeing you. Another member of the 141 will find a solution to cover your face, you are Kyle’s first priority and he’ll gladly hold you all day

After a long mission, you and Kyle are finally safe upon reaching exfil. Sitting on a helicopter Kyle slumps against his seat, and you do the same beside him. Although he could finally relax, he feels absolutely filthy, swamped in his own sweat under multiple layers. Dirt and mud caked his boots and crept all the way up to his thighs. Some even sneaked up into under his tactical vest.

He spares a look and sometimes he thinks you can’t possibly be human. The heat is suffocating enough without a mask, Kyle has long forgone his signature cap to let his head breathe. If your body language was any indicator, you weren’t handling the sweltering heat of the helicopter engine or Al Mazrah’s temperament. Your chest notably heaving under the weight of your tactical gear, breaths so laboured it sent the fabric around your mouth pulling and billowing with each inhale and exhale.

There isn’t much Kyle can do for comfort, but he tries. He shifts a little closer to you. Your head shifts to look at him, the movement was far too slow, like your head was too heavy and his heart tugs a little.

With one hand, Kyle gently tilts your face up to him. With the other he lightly pinches the fabric of your mask at the junction between your jawline and ear. Teasing it between his fingers, when he pulls his hand away there’s gunk on his fingertips. Dust, dirt and as he squints at your mask he realises that some of the stains are likely the dried blood of an unidentified enemy.

The hand he’s resting on your chin is about to pull away until he notices how you’re resting your head on it. He can’t see your face but he has no doubt that your eyes are near shut, almost drifting off to dreamland. He occupies himself by gently brushing away loose debris off your mask which has you relaxing further into his touch.

“We gotta wash this,” he murmurs defeatedly.

“... yeah, we do,” you grumble, voice thick with fatigue. Kyle does not stop his ministrations - even pulling some fluff off of the cotton of your mask. It does little to actually clean your mask - at this rate it’s going to need pure bleach to clean it - but he can’t bring himself to stop. Not when you trust him this much, leaning into his touch, entrusting him to be the respite from your mission.

Masked Reader Masterlist Call of Duty Masterlist

#cod x reader #call of duty x reader #cod x you #task force 141 x reader #captain price x reader #john price x reader #ghost x reader #simon riley x you #john mactavish x reader #soap x reader #gaz x reader #kyle garrick x reader #/*avery actually writes*/#/*cod x masked reader*/

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sayoneee · 4 months

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☆ PARENT TRAP

in which, a plan is devised to set the two of you up (1.9k)

contains: luke castellan x fem! reader. mortal au. baby percabeth (they are 12). percys pov. loser older brother luke castellan 🔛🔝

kashaf’s note: i think we can tell i love my music references by now. (answering requests soon!)

i. remember the time - michael jackson

PERCY HAS ALWAYS liked afternoons: sitting on the green couch in his apartment, the smell of his favorite blue cookies wafting through the air, and the constantly running episodes of gilmore girls on the tv — that you had convinced him to give a try — and sometimes the addition of grover, who was prone to start passionate tirades on climate change.

though after summer camp, his relatively quiet afternoons now included at least two mentions of “seaweed brain” and two of “wise girl”.

percy’s trying to stay focused on rory freaking out over thanking dean for something (annabeth is almost laser-focused), but the doorbell rang a while ago, and you still haven’t returned.

“annabeth,” he whispered, to no avail — he guessed dean really had that effect on people. he tried again, waving a hand in front of her face. she blinked twice before being lifted from the spell of gilmore girls.

“what?” annabeth asked.

“who’s at the door?”

annabeth’s eyebrows rose. she turned around, looking past where you were still holding the door open, one hand animatedly gesticulating, the other still on the doorknob.

“that’s my brother,” annabeth said, turning back to look at percy.

but percy isn’t paying attention to her right now, instead, he’s focusing on the bits of conversation audible between you and this stranger, who’s smiling very peculiarly down at you.

“— no way, me too,” the stranger is saying, grinning.

you’re saying, “deadass? prove it —”

“— are you always so skeptical —”

percy gets up off the couch, annabeth beside him, striding over to you and the stranger, who, for a reason he can’t quite put a finger on, seems weird.

“hi,” percy says, looking at you, pointedly ignoring the stranger. you and the stranger seem to freeze, your hand halting mid-tuck of your hair behind your ear, something percy has only seen you do around one of your ex-boyfriends.

“hi,” annabeth says, looking at the stranger, who smiles in response. again, weird.

“ready to go?” the stranger asks, “or are you going to take over their spare bedroom?”

“luke, you’re not funny,” annabeth grumbles, but she doesn’t look that put out by luke’s teasing percy notes.

you’re smiling, but you’re not looking at annabeth. you’re looking at luke, your one hand still on the doorknob. interesting.

“you’ve got your yankees cap?” you confirm as annabeth laces up her converse, as you and luke are engaged in a tiny conversation of your own. percy wordlessly hands the worn-out cap to annabeth once she’s finished, saying his goodbye.

once annabeth and her brother are long gone and you’re no longer leaning against the door, you’re still smiling widely, and percy wonders why.

ii. shoop - salt n pepa

gilmore girls is on again, and luke is here to pick up annabeth. again. but for whatever reason, annabeth still hasn’t left, and you and luke are sitting in the kitchen, alone, conversing loudly.

annabeth isn’t as hyper-focused on dean and rory’s argument as percy had thought she would be a week ago — he assumed that dean’s appeal died the minute he got mad in that banged-up car. annabeth is saying something about architecture, eyes shining, though he’s not sure which one she’s talking about, hagia sophia or st. basil’s cathedral. your loud laugh seems to ring from the kitchen every minute or so, and well since you’ve begun babysitting him, he can’t say the sound is unfamiliar, but the frequency is suspicious. he doesn’t trust luke.

“annabeth,” he says, when she’s stopped talking.

“percy,” she responds in the same tone, her smile bright.

“how long has your brother been in the kitchen for?” he says, trying to sound nonchalant, but missing the mark horrifically.

annabeth looks at the watch on her wrist, “woah —”

“what does woah mean?” percy knows he’s being impolite, and his mom taught him to never interrupt people, but he can’t help it at this moment.

“i was just getting to that, seaweed brain,” annabeth rolled her eyes good-naturedly, “we were supposed to leave an hour and half ago.”

this was bizarre. “no offense, but what does my babysitter and your brother even have in common to be talking nonstop for an hour and half?”

“no idea,” annabeth says, thoughtfully. “is she in a band? luke’s in a band.”

“no,” percy says, but he thinks he remembers your last boyfriend being in a band. “is your brother a senior?”

“yeah — does she do boxing? luke does.”

“i actually don’t know,” percy pauses, “i think we should see for ourselves,” he stands up.

“wait,” annabeth says, “they might go quiet if they see we’re around. let’s just turn off the tv and eavesdrop.”

percy grins, annabeth was such a genius, “you got it, wise girl.”

they’re both so silent, he wonders if you’ll notice, but with the way you’re laughing again, borderline giggling, actually — which is odd — as you say, “shut up, you know what i meant,” he doesn’t think you’ll realize.

“erm, actually i don’t,” luke says, nasally (in what percy hopes is mockery).

percy looks at annabeth, who rolls her eyes at him and mouths, ‘he’s being ironic’. percy stares at the patterns in the carpet, and annabeth stares at the picture of percy and his mom hung on the wall, as they continue to strain their ears — which isn’t hard because of how noisy you and luke are together.

“you’re so insufferable.”

“and you’re the one who invited me in, so.”

“i was being nice,” you sound like you’re protesting, but percy and annabeth note the amusement in your voice with another shared glance.

“you? nice? let’s be forreal.”

“i’m literally not even mean.”

“you literally are.”

annabeth peeks at him, and percy thinks he’s had enough of listening to this conversation, which is quickly becoming weird. and mushy. he can practically see how you’re looking at luke, and how he’s looking at you, which is not at all something he wants to imagine.

he nods at annabeth, and they both try to make their footsteps as loud as possible when they start approaching the kitchen, just in case.

he’s grateful to every higher being out there when he and annabeth find you and luke in the kitchen simply sitting next to each other, no funny business involved.

iii. doo wop (that thing) - ms. lauryn hill

you’re on the phone, giggling. annabeth is over again, and there’s no luke in sight, but percy suspects he’s on the other end of the line.

percy sighs and turns to annabeth, who always seems to know what to do because this little situation has gotten unbelievably out of hand.

“is that your brother on the phone?”

annabeth’s concentration on the teetering jenga tower on the coffee table lingers, doo wop (that thing) playing on the tv in the background, “yeah, i think so.”

“how do you know?” percy asks, watching annabeth carefully choose a jenga block to remove.

“they like each other,” annabeth says, looking at him, as if it’s as obvious as grass being green.

“no, they don’t,” percy pauses for a minute when annabeth raises her eyebrows at him. “how do you know?”

“luke’s always calling her at home,” annabeth said, “and he made her a mixtape.”

“that doesn’t mean they like each other, that just means he likes her,” percy points out, crossing his arms.

they hear you giggle in the kitchen again. annabeth looks at him as if that proves her point.

annabeth blinks, her face lighting up, “oh my god, percy, we should set them up.”

percy stares at her. he can’t deny that for as long as he’s known annabeth, she’s seldom been wrong, but he doesn’t think this is the best idea. but, percy trusts annabeth, so he agrees.

iv. this is how we do it - montell jordan

percy’s spying on you. well, he doesn’t consider it to be spying exactly, he’s just making sure nothing happens to you because despite annabeth’s constant defense of her brother, percy still doesn’t trust luke. percy’s always thought of you more than just his babysitter, after all the attempts at making blue hot chocolate and the comforting after nightmares, you’ve turned into his sister.

he’s at annabeth’s place now, and both of them decided to put their — what annabeth swears is fool-proof — plan into action. step number one: getting luke to invite you inside when you come to pick him up (which was so unbelievably easy, considering how luke has perpetual heart eyes when you’re around).

currently, you’re in the kitchen with luke (the two of you are always congregating in kitchens for some reason), and annabeth decided that she and percy absolutely had to keep an eye on the two of you.

you’re gasping, “luke castellan, you are such a liar.”

luke is laughing, “no i’m not.” his cheeks are red.

you’ve seemed to notice this, and percy can see your gaze soften as you look at luke, but that doesn’t stop you from making your point, “no, oh my god, you call me the mean one but here you are, talking shit about your rivals, just because they’re better?”

percy has seen you argue with your ex-boyfriends, but not like this — not bright-eyed, and smiling, and none of them have been able to just flow the way you seem to with luke. this is it, he thinks, annabeth was completely and utterly right (as she is 90% of the time).

“you take that back right now, those motley crue knockoffs aren’t better than us,” luke says, sounding kind of angry, but percy can see his smile.

“you’re totally bugging,” you say, “what’s wrong with motley crue?”

luke looks scandalized, and almost as if he’s pleading, he says, “please tell me you’ve at least listened to guns n roses,” pushing his hands together in a namaste position.

“i don’t live under a rock, castellan,” you rolled your eyes at him, pushing his hands down. annabeth shares a look with percy.

“i mean, you never know,” he says, and you scoff, shoving him.

percy raises his eyebrows at annabeth, and she seems to know exactly what he’s thinking — time to put step two into action: set up a going-out idea.

percy and annabeth pretend to walk closer to the kitchen, to give the two of you time to spring apart, because you and luke weren’t a very pg distance right now — maybe pg-thirteen, but percy wasn’t supposed to be watching those, so.

annabeth jerks a finger at percy, as you and luke looked up at their arrival, addressing luke, “percy doesn’t believe that your band actually plays in public.”

percy’s head whips toward annabeth, trying not to glare at her, because the look on luke’s face right now was not at all amusing, but at least you were smiling, so you’d definitely stop luke from killing him.

“yeah, luke,” you say, smirking, “where do you guys even play?”

luke frowns, “the usual but we’re playing at the fair next week if you’re so interested.” the last part is aimed at percy, but their plan is going well so far, so percy doesn’t think he’ll have to sleep with one eye open tonight.

“when?” you ask, interested.

percy watches luke turn to you, surprised. “saturday — why, you wanna come?”

“yeah,” you admit easily.

percy looks at annabeth, who’s smiling and percy can’t help but feel proud of their idea.

“really? we don’t go on until like seven though.”

“yeah, someone has to be there to cheer for you so you don’t feel too bad when no one else does,” you grin.

luke turns to you, masking his smile with a fake air of irritation, “gee, thanks.”

“what are friends for?”

percy shares a disappointed glance with annabeth who begins to shake her head, as luke’s smile freezes in place, and you suddenly look extremely remorseful.

time to come up with a new plan.

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dragon-wisteria · 2 years

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Oh don't use kinde unlimited/audible/other service run by a big corporation, just use your local library instead! They have [list of services that my local library does not provide]

#I don't know if this is a small town problem or an england problem but.#my library's audio- and e-book service has a TINY selection. and it's mostly biographies and children's books #if I want to read a fantasy book more obscure than game of thrones? Too bad! They don't have it #and I have never seen a 3d printer or a sewing machine in a library???#yeah you should definitely check if your library has things available before you shell out for a paid service.#but stop acting like everyone has a flawless library service at their finger tips that solves all their problems #i don't even use ku or an audible subscription I'm jsut tired of being preached at

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audible-smiles · 2 years

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the last book I read (A Vanished World by Chris Lowney) seemed to imply that that generalization broadly holds true, but I'm about to read a book with very strong opinions on that subject (The Myth of the Andalusian Paradise by Darío Fernández-Morera) so when I've finished processing whatever this guy says I'll let you know what I think (so far)

#I haven't read The Ornament of the World yet #but its on my list #just dabbling about in what's available at local library #not like...highly respectable scholarly sources #way too much of a fake history girl for primary source research #glamstructed #audible replies

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rs-hawk · 5 months

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Kinkmas: Day Three

The Yeti

You’ve always hated camping. Actually, hating it is an understatement. You loathe it. Whoever invented camping can go get fucked, disrespectfully. However, when the rest of your Sorority Sisters beg you to go with them because they want to do “bonding” over Winter Break, you don’t feel like you have much of a choice. With a groan and constant complaining, you reluctantly go with them.

You all have your own tent, which you comment on how that really makes no sense if this is supposed to be a bonding thing, but they tell you even for bonding you need privacy. You’re annoyed, mad, cold, and now kind of scared as the night is coming and they put out the fire because no one is going to stay up with it. You want to offer to, but you’re also too scared to be out of the tent by yourself.

You have a fitful sleep, so when you hear a twig break outside, of course it wakes you up. Your mouth feels dry, and you’re shaking in your sleeping bag. Part of you wants to call out to see if it’s one of your Sisters, but you’re scared of the possibility that it’s not. So, you stay huddled in your sleeping bag, staring at the front of your tent, trying to make out any shape.

You feel relieved when you see that it does look like a humanoid figure. However, that doesn’t last long when you realize how large it is. Your mouth goes dry again, and tears prick your eyes. You purposefully picked the most secluded place. No one else should be out this far.

The figure makes its way to you, and before you could cry out, your tent is ripped open. Before you stands a giant creature with long, white hair, and a soft blue tint to its dark skin. You swallow hard when you see a large cock hanging between its-his- legs, and quiver when you notice it hardening as it regards you.

The creature grabs you, tossing you over his shoulder and covering your mouth with one of his large hands. In a matter of moments, you’re far from the campsite, and approaching a cave. You start squirming, trying to escape the grasp of this thing, but to no avail. You get thrown down on a bed-like nest, your sleeping bag ripped off of your body as the creature shoved a finger down your throat.

You gag and drool around it as you try to push it away, but it’s no use. The creature rips off your clothing the same way he did your sleeping bag, and before you realize it, he shoves another of his large fingers inside of you.

You whine and squirm, trying to escape it. It’s bigger than anything you’ve ever taken, and him moving it impossibly slow is still painful. The finger in your mouth pushes deeper, making you audibly gag. That’s when the creature seems to take a bit of care with you. He takes his finger away from your mouth, letting you take deep, greedily breathes.

“Please,” you pant, trying to push his hand away from you. “Stop.”

Of course, he does no such thing. Instead he pushes you down, his fat tongue licking down your neck before he begins to lick and suck on your nipples. Unable to help yourself or stop it, you whine in pleasure. The creature, which you finally recognize as a Yeti from stories, seems to take this as encouragement. The finger inside of you quickens it’s pace as he licks and sucks on your nipples, using his other hand to hold you against him. Your slick finally makes it easier for him to move deeper inside of you.

You let out a chorus of repressed and reluctant moans as he moves inside of you and pleasures you. As much as you hate to admit it, it feels amazing. He starts making his way down your body again, and his large mouth is sucking on your clit. You yelp, bucking your hips against him.

Fuck. Oh fuck.

You groan and whine, panting again as you approach your orgasm. However, just as he’s about to put you over the edge, he stops. You’re about to move to finish it yourself when he buries his massive cock inside of you. A cry bubbles up from your throat as he stretches you impossibly wide, his cock bullying directly into your cervix. You can feel his precum leaking into you as if coating your womb for his cum. You start begging him to stop. It’s too much, but he either doesn’t understand you or doesn’t care.

He repeatedly bullies his cock into your cervix, ramming into you enough to show an imprint of his cock in your stomach. He flips you over, shoving your face into the nest and making him feel so large you feel like you’re going to be split in half. You’re still on the edge of your orgasm, despite all this, so when he starts playing with and teasing your clit, you cum almost instantly. You tighten around his cock, drawing it somehow deeper into you. You grunt and whine as you spasm around him, gripping the nest under you.

In only a matter of moments, he cums deep inside of you, pumping you full of thick ropes of cum. Enough that it spills out of you, but he doesn’t stop. He moans and growls, cramming his cock as far as he can inside of you. All you can do is lay there and take it, and hope that after this, he takes you back to camp.

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heart2beom · 1 year

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cliché

pairing: bsf!yeonjun x reader

genre: fluff, best friends to lovers, crack, little angst

synopsis: after yeonjun hears you referring to him as someone who's like a brother ...he tries his hardest to make you see him as a potential boyfriend.

or in which you're perplexed at all the movie hangouts your friend has been initiating.

warning: mature language, reader is assumed to be fem

notes: honestly, i always try to cut down the word count to make it more available for people who only read drabbles/blurbs but i just CANT. so here's another short oneshot T-T and as always, reblog to help the algorithm pick up on this :D

yeonjun was confused walking back home -- no, the whole day, he was disturbed. the reason for this was yesterday...when he went to get drinks for both you and him at a frat party.

the crowds were insanely hard to get through (and it didn't help that people kept on stopping him to 'catch up' or whatnot) so it took him more than fifty minutes to come back with the drinks he promised to get.

but it looked like it was too late because the people you were surrounding yourself with when yeonjun was there...disappeared. instead, you're bundled up, alone in a corner, with a guy he does not know. which was already weird because yeonjun knew everybody, and that was enough reason for him to hurry his ass up through sweaty frat drunks and make sure the unknown guy isn't some sleazeball.

that time he wasn't aware that he rolled his eyes but he did conciously plan to squeeze himself into the conversation...and technically cockblock.

but when he neared you...that's when his world shattered...on more dramatic terms. it was more like his confidence was shot down to the deepest depths of hell.

"oh, yeonjun? pfft, he's like a brother!"

even though it was almost barely audible due to the blasting music, 'brother' to his ears were magnified -- the word circling through his head.

brother. brother?!

and as a result of this baffling situation, he had backed himself in an opposing corner with your cup in his right and his cup in his left, way further than you now, thinking of where did it go wrong?

he's never had someone friend-zone him -- for heavensake, he's yeonjun, he's aware of how attractive he is. but brother-zone? that was even worse of an attack!

it doesn't matter that you said it -- come on, that's barely the case. it's the fact that someone was so unattracted to him that he was seen as a sibling.

sure, you and yeonjun were a sort of bunch that have been together since... forever, really. seriously, you were friends since elementary -- when you joined the school, fourth grade, mindlessly kicking rocks at recess he approached you like the social butterfly kid that he was, asking you if you wanted to come play with his friends.

once he took another sip of the red cup in his right hand, the fruity punch being way too overbearing (just how'd you like it), he furrowed his brows together.

he definitely doesn't see you as a sister.

he'd have to admit that when middle school hit and his puberty was acting up around ...the seventh grade? he was convinced that he would eventually marry you like the way his parents were. a brother wouldn't have felt that way about his sister! normally that is...

granted, he mostly blamed that on the first strikes of puberty because right after middle school, he moved on from the thought -- completely abandoning his pre-puberty dreams, but that was besides the point!

he was getting nauseous from the sweetness of his drink and the further he thought about the way you thought of him, he felt that he would ruin the party by vomiting on someone.

his night was officially ruined. absolutely, fundementally, literally ruined.

and thats how he found himself unfocused on everything around him the next day, finally making the decision to consult with his roommates about this frankly, very big conundrum.

"you can't just purposefully leave out important details? like, how am i supposed to diagnose you properly bro?" beomgyu asked as he spammed the keys on his controller.

"you're not diagnosing me--" yeonjun exhaled, wanting to to keep the banter to the minimum in respect to the issue he's facing. "literally what do you think we're doing right now?"

"i'm going to be completely honest and say ...i have no idea-- shit, what the fuck are you doing heeseung? jump! jump!" he yelled towards the big screen in front of him.

yeonjun groaned, turning his head to behind the couch. "soobin, it's not too late to help out your only friend!" he yelled out in hopes of it reaching the guy's bedroom.

and with no response, he turned back to watching the game beomgyu was playing. "god, you know how many times i gave that guy life changing advice on women?"

"and this is how he repays me?"

beomgyu nodded along to whatever yeonjun was mumbling about until the brunette magically connected dots and euphoric realization hit him. beomgyu almost scrambled around to completely face him this time, "hold on, hold on. yeonjun you lost me, are you having girl problems?"

to that, yeonjun rolled his eyes. "i wouldn't call it 'girl problems', that sounds like a problem soobin would have."

"uh-huh ...uh-huh. no, no yeah." beomgyu said nodding mindlessly to save the guy some face. "heeseung i'm logging off dude, yeonjuns got girl problems."

yeonjun just deadpanned to the back of the guys head, having no will to correct him.

he wanted to get the pending issue out of the way first.

it was more situated a few minutes later. instead of beomgyu sitting on the floor criss crossed, leaned on the couch yeonjun was sitting on, beomgyu was now sitting on the chair next to the couch, his elbows on his knees, brows deeply furrowed.

and not to forget yeonjun's pen and paper in hand.

"so... you're trying to get a girl to like you?"

"not like. i want her to see me as someone she would want as a boyfrie--" when he saw beomgyus brow raising up as to say 'whats the difference' he cleared his throat. "yea, basically."

"don't you know how to do that though?"

he shrugged, "it's different this time."

"how?"

"trust me, it's very different."

"okay but how?"

"you'd be the last person i'd ask for an interrogation beomgyu, that'd be a task for like... taehyun or something."

"i'm sorry that i need to understand my client first--"

"i am not your client" yeonjun said, rolling his eyes.

"what's going on here?", yeonjun turned his head to see soobin behind the kitchen island, scooping himself some icecream.

"dude, where were you when i needed you?", yeonjun asked.

"me and yj are holding a dating therapy session."

yeonjun turned his head to beomgyu, "again, it's not a therapy sessio--"

"you're getting dating advice from beomgyu?" soobin asked, his face scrunched up doubting if it really got this bad.

and back to soobin. "when you say it like that.." "soobin can you please leave yeonjun alone? he's in a very vulnerable state right now"

then beomgyu again. "i'm seriously going to beat you up." he said, biting his bottom lip and raising his fist against his roommate. beomgyu immediately jumps dramatically, shielding himself with his arms up.

"see? he's getting violent!"

soobin finally plopped on the couch next to yeonjun with his cup of icecream. "explain it to me, maybe i can help you out."

"i'll save you the trouble, he's not explaining for whatever reason--"

"a girl said that i'm like a brother to her." yeonjun reluctantly mumbled.

a wave of silence hit the dorm, for a minute yeonjun thought they just didn't hear him and to be completely honest, he was about to thank the gods because he regretted saying anything the moment he did, but that thought was immediately shot down when both sides of his ears were being blasted by humiliating laughter.

soobin got up, patting yeonjun's shoulder as reassurance, still laughing. "yeah, good luck with that hyung."

"okay, it's not even that bad--"

"dude, not even cha eunwoo would survive the sibling zone." beomgyu said, a hard reality check for yeonjun. "though hyunbin might.." he mumbled to himself. yeonjun caught it though, but it didn't matter. yeonjun was no hyunbin.

"fuck." he breathed out, the utensils he was holding had lesser grip on them as he just stared into nothingness. beomgyu was right. he's forever stuck as a brother in your eyes.

but then a ring of his phone snaps him out of it.

when he checks the id, his ambition is restored almost immediately for whatever reason; it was you.

"yo why are you smiling?", beomgyu said trying to peep at yeonjun's phone, but yeonjun reflexes took over, and he immediately turned his phone off.

"beomgyu, don't you think i kind of resemble hyunbin?" he said with a head tilt and an overconfident smirk, talking like he just had an epiphany.

"the one from crash landing on you? uh no."

yeonjun jumped from the couch a new man, his pen and paper in one hand and his ringing phone on the other. he finally faced beomgyu as the man he was, choi motherfucking yeonjun. "i gotta answer this call...and also, if you ask anybody who my celebrity doppelganger is, everyone would proudly say its hyunbin dumbass."

then yeonjun left with a smile and a surge of new confidence overtaking his face as he spoke away on the phone with you, while beomgyu was left in the living room more than confused as he looked up the actor on his phone.

instead of finding the difference, beomgyus brain was tasking him into finding the similarities...which, there was one to yeonjun's credit.

black hair.

"when are the others coming?" you asked looking around the crowded floor as yeonjun was buying popcorn and drinks. "the movies about to start.." you mumbled, checking your phone for the hundredth time.

"oh, i guess its just me and you again." he said with the popcorn and bottle of coke finally in his arms.

"again? don't you think this is getting suspicious?" you said as you walked alongside yeonjun, not noticing the way yeonjun just gulped.

you stopped in your tracks, in turn yeonjun bumping into your back a little, a few popcorns dropping on the floor.

"hey...you don't think.." you furrowed your brows, in deep thought. this has been on your mind for a while now. "you don't think they're trying to set us up or something do you?"

after the third time your friends stood you and yeonjun up, you were starting to think they were pushing, what they called, the 'ynjun' agenda..but it was the first time you'd ever bring it up to yeonjun, so you just laughed it off -- scolding your friends will come on a later date.

"nevermind, lets go inside the movie theatre jun."

"ya' y/n, wait."

you turned around to an awkward standing yeonjun at first, but he immediately straightens up and clears his throat, with a smile you've grown so attached to -- the smile that reached his eyes. for something so simple, it made your heart beat a little quicker than normal.

"can you hold the coke for a sec? i'm trynna--i'm trynna do something."

you break into a light laugh, "um, okay." that snapped you out of it because you remember who he was again -- your platonic best friend.

you took the cola bottle off his right arm, expecting him to take his phone out of his pocket to check something.

but as you stared at your sneakers, checking if they're untied, you felt his hand on top of your head, which startled you.

you looked up to meet yeonjuns eyes, a brow raised.

before you could say anything, he ruffled the top of your hair gently, leaning towards you a bit, to shorten the height difference.

"y/n, let this be our first date." your platonic best friend's voice, so warm and gentle you thought you would only hear in dreams, said those words...to you.

"so you asked her out on a date but you don't even like her...? that doesn't make any sense." soobin said, sitting on the couch watching beomgyu hog up the tv screen, his use time running out.

"bros an asshole..but i feel like we knew that already-- fuck you heeseung. you fucking suck ass you need to get off my team." beomgyu yelled.

"okay, first of all, it's not that bad. she doesn't like me at all, plus the date was how we would usually hung out anyway."

soobin just shook his head -- being the only guy with a functioning moral compass amongst the people he called his friends was exhausting.

as soon as he was about to lecture yeonjun, the tv timer goes off -- and that makes his plan a fleeting thought.

"it's my turn now, throw me the remote."

"bro give me a second, let me finish this gam--"

"no! unplug your console." soobin yelled impatiently, he knew better than to let beomgyu go over the timer again.

beomgyu groaned, abandoning heeseung in the game and unplugging his console. when soobin got control of the tv and opened up netflix, beomgyu stood up to sit next to yeonjun -- who had gotten a notification from you.

"yj, who's the chick? you never told us."

"uh, you don't really know her." he mindlessly answered, focused on the messages from you.

[y/n, 9:16 pm] that serenade ..as cringe as it was.. [y/n, 9:16 pm] like lets be serious, there was NO reason for u to get on top of the cafeteria table lol

he hadn't yet told his roommates what he did this morning, thinking that he'd get a longer lecture by soobin.

but he had took inspiration from the movie you guys were watching the other night at the cinema. you talked his ear off about how romantic it was, how you would fall at the feet of dicaprio if he did the same to you..

he was no dicaprio, but he could try is what he thought. and though you forced him to get down half way through, he could still enjoy sharing the laughter, your laughter, that was ringing in his ear.

[yeonjun, 9:17 pm] as cringe as it was...? you're in love w me ;)

he typed it as a joke, a smile tugging on his lips waiting for your reaction to his teasing.

but beomgyu hovered over his phone out of boredom again, and out of instinct yeonjun threw his phone -- the three chois looking at the phone on the floor in shock.

"bro, why are you being so secretive? were you sexting?" beomgyu yelled, accusatory.

"can we collectively have some decency in this house, jesus fucking christ beomgyu." soobin muttered.

"shut up church boy, yeonjun's hiding something for sure."

"or maybe he just wanted some privacy dude?" soobin retaliated.

yeonjun jumped up pointing at soobin, "exactly! exactly! listen to soobin, you were invading my personal space. so not cool beomgyu."

"yeah, okay. you've never agreed with me with this much enthusiasm before. he's hiding something. quick, check his phone." to soobins order, beomgyu was prepared to run to the phone when he made eye contact with the owner -- but yeonjun was quick.

"good god, wait wait. what do you want beomgyu--fuck, if you wanted her name it's y/n alright? the chick's y/n!" yeonjun doesn't do well under pressure, at all.

"what are you talking about--" beomgyu's face morphed into shock with his mouth agape. "--oh my fucking god. yeonjun, y/n's the chick? the one who brother zoned you?" beomgyu yelled.

"yeah...?" he said hesitantly.

"i can't--i just can't. soobin knock some sense into him." beomgyu turned away dramatically, shaking his head.

"yeonjun--" soobin started.

"dude, y/n has been in love with you for like a decade!" beomgyu blurted out, turning to face yeonjun again, interrupting soobin.

"uh..no? guys, i literally told you that she said she sees me as a brother. i saw her telling some guy that at the frat party last week."

beomgyu walked towards yeonjun, grabbing both of his shoulders, shaking him, "she. didn't. brother. zone. you. you stupid fuck!"

"she's been saying that to people because its so obvious that every time she tries moving on, she still likes you." soobin added in.

yeonjun, with his brows furrowed, tore beomgyu's hands off his shoulder -- walking towards his phone.

and it felt like a million thoughts were racing around his head the three seconds it took for him to get his phone, like a storm, a big tornado clouding his mind. but the most heavy was...how long? a fucking decade? and he never noticed?

he found it hard to swallow, almost nervous...that it was true.

the two other chois were staring at him, exchanging glances.

and when he picked up his phone, it was like he feared.

his text was left on read.

yeonjun's roommates were right for once.

all the secret glances he'd catch, a smirk twitching on his face as he pretended not to see, all the times you'd practically asked him out -- he shot it all down subconsciously thinking it was nothing more than coincidences on top of coincidences.

"you know, i was thinking it was weird you freaked out so much about the brother thing. yunjin told you that right to your face like last month and you didn't say anything." beomgyu said as he let himself fall on the couch.

beomgyu was right, he didn't care when yunjin said it.

yeonjun looked at beomgyu, eyes confused. "so...what are you trying to say?"

"maybe you feel the same way...? god, do i have to spell it out for you every single time?" he said dramatically, groaning.

"okay yeonjun. drama's over, go do your walk of shame to your room." soobin said, getting comfortable on the chair again to watch the premier of his show.

"and reflect!" beomgyu shouted out as yeonjun went over to his room, obeying soobin with his phone tight in hand.

"what are we watchin?" beomgyu finally asked, soobin giving him a side eye in response.

"we? beomgyu, i'm not watching another show premier with you again."

"just because my commentary is too good doesn't mean you have to get all jealous--"

yeonjun bursts out of his room through the narrow hallway that lead to the main door, a coat hanging on his right arm as he hurriedly slipped on his sneakers.

it startled both of the guys on the couch, looking over at him with brows raised: what is yeonjun doing?

no one could get a word in, not even beomgyu, before he was totally out of sight.

only adrenaline was rushing through his veins as he shut the door behind him, putting his arms through his padded coat, and sprinting to the elevator -- frantically spamming the button to make him falsely hope the elevator would reach his floor any faster

it wasn't like he had to do something in the ten minutes his head thought he had left, no, it was the realization that had him acting in urgency he never thought he'd have for a girl. all of his stupidity dawning on him -- for fucksake, of course it mattered that you said he was like a brother, it was you.

and as he ran out the building -- his head felt dizzy, not because it was overwhelmed with thoughts, no, this time he only had a few but those were harder to manage his head.

did he ever give up on you in middle school?

did he ever move on from you in highschool?

did he really dump a dream, you -- the dream he had as a boy, with all the other dreams he never thought would happen?

when yeonjun was finally in front of your family house, the one you still chose to live in through your college experience, he moved to where'd he guess the window of your room was.

"y/n?" he shouted out with all the energy he could muster up. he had to bend over his knee to catch his breath, because he would shout your name again.

again, and again, and again.

blood rushed up to his cheeks, not because of the cold, because he was embarrassed -- what if you weren't even here?

he waited, staring up at the window which showed no sign of your room light being on.

but he wouldn't give up, he'd have to try something else.

yeonjun looked down at his feet, the absence of the sun being harder on his vision. there were no rocks, the only thing visible to his eyes were branch sticks which only made him hope that his aim was good enough to get your window a few times.

it wasn't.

when the last stick that he found hit a window that wasn't the one he was trying to aim at - he cursed under his breath, defeated. yeonjun concluded that this was a bigger fail than the fucking time he found out that he was flirting at a family--not a class, reunion.

he could just go back to his dorm and call you is what he thought as he exhaled, a fog escaping his lips into the cold, feeling even more of a loser.

"yeonjun?!" he turned around at the familiar voice calling out for him and his eyes widened, lighting up as they set on your face, finally out of the window, with your room light making it a little easier for him to see your features.

"y/n?" he shouted back, ecstatic.

"what are you doing out here?", you shouted the words slowly so he could pick it up. then add, "it's fucking cold!"

"i just wanted to know" he inhaled, the cold air burning his nostrils, "why you didn't answer my text!"

it was silent, yeonjuns lips agape waiting for a response.

"you're fucking insane!" you said laughs slipping between your words, yeonjun scoffs lightly, a wide smile on his face.

he put his hands up as walls to his mouth to echo his words louder, "for you!" he shouted out in response.

"shut the fuck up!" it was a distant yell, one you both assumed, as you met eye contact, was y/n's neighbors. and then you laughed again at the untimely part of it all.

when you turned away from the window, yeonjun found himself yearningly waiting for you to come back. hands that were in his pockets felt a vibration -- his phone.

he took it out just to see a notification from his, quite frankly, favorite person ever.

[y/n, 10:26 pm] lets talk on here lol

he looked up and saw you at the window again, with you waving your phone at him -- it earned a smile tugging once more, on the ends of his lips.

just how did he manage to ignore overwhelming feelings about you, of you, for the past decade?

[yeonjun, 10:27 pm] come down. i'm not gonna tell u this thru text [y/n, 10:27 pm] why not? [yeonjun, 10:27 pm] don't wanna [y/n, 10:28 pm] youre asking me to get out of my cozy ass room just bcs u dont wanna??

"yeah! basically dumbass!" he shouted, startling your poor self out of your focus on your phone. you glared at him, yeonjun most likely missing it.

[y/n, 10:28 pm] STOP DONT DO THAT THOSE PSYCHOS ARE GOING TO CALL THE COPS ON ME [yeonjun, 10:29 pm] ok then come down before i freeze my fingers off

when you slid your window closed, closing your curtains, he immediately turned to quickly run towards the front of your house. yeonjun leaned on the fence of your porch, smiling with thoughts of you clouding his mind, as he looked up at the moon.

it was all so cliché -- the type of scene his roommates would squeal over and one that he would roll his eyes to, but if he were to watch this part of his life, again and again -- the moment you opened the door, the moment you both exchanged looks that communicated 'we feel the same way don't we?', a short awkward laugh that was shared, the moment you hesitantly opened your mouth to say something -- and then, the final moment of his longing lips crashing onto yours, his cold hands warming up the moment he cupped your face, the repocracy from your side making him smile into the kiss, the euphoric realisation that he wasn't late, you didn't stop loving him yet, and when he cut the kiss short, both your lips barely apart, yeonjun whispered an i love you, and to it you smiled, pulling him into your house, to finish your kiss -- he would too, squeal over the scene, kicking his feet like a highschool girl.

ending a/n: YOU FINISHED IT YAY :D yeonjun was lowk an asshole for wanting to lead on mc at first for his own benefit, but hes such a cutie im sorry, its easy to forgive T-T let me know what you feel about this piece, it was so fun to write!!

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konigsblog · 1 month

Note

what- what if it was step-dad könig and his step daughter in her 20’s coming home wearing a skimpy dress and drunk and crying over a useless college boy :3

stepfather-könig taking ‘care’ of his sweet stepdaughter (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠)

TW: STEPCEST, INTOXICATION (NON-CON/DUB-CON), AGE GAP/DIFFERENCE (20s-50s). DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT.

MDNI 18+

your stepfather claims that he's simply taking care of you, but through your drunken state, you don't realise how he's taking advantage of you. too vulnerable and needy for love, that you'll accept anything — even to be fucked by your stepfather...

stepfather-könig can't understand the importance behind this silly, useless collage boy. he doesn't understand how you're so worked up over this boy, your cheeks wet and glossy from the burning tears rolling down your sensitive cheeks.

your stepfather can hear the sounds of your audible, and pained sobs, crying into your pillow ‘til the fabric turns wet, your skimpy dress rolling up, stinking of alcohol and nicotine. he's almost pissed off that you're this upset — and tries to convince you that you deserve someone older, more mature, with experience and knows how to take care of you.

it's depraved and disgusting for him to use this opportunity as a way to get into your panties, but he takes any opportunity available to re-enact on his deepest and darkest fantasies, grinding his clothed cock against your tight, covered cunt to get your attention, telling he'd make it up to you...

you're his stepdaughter, and he's fully aware what he's doing is immoral and frowned upon. he shouldn't be this desperate to get into your panties, but he just wants the best for you, liebling... :(

he begins to peel off your lace panties, pulling them down your figure whilst you begin to roll your skimpy dress up, clearly not thinking straight.

könig admires the sight of your tight and pretty pussy, still to be ruined by a disgusting, horrible man like him. he rubs his thick, slick tip against your sensitive, needy clit in soothing circles whilst you gaze down between your thighs, watching as he begins to wrap his bulky, strong arms around your soft thighs, pushing his face between your legs, his tongue pressed against your wet cunny.

you weep and mewl pathetically, grinding against your stepfather's face like a perverted, little thing. you rock your hips back and forth, rolling them as he flicks his tongue against your sensitive nub, stuffing your mouth with your damp panties to stifle your pleasured moans and needy squeals. your eyes roll to the back of your head as he buries his tongue inside your sopping wet pussy, preparing you for his girthy and lengthy cock, to fuck you mercilessly whilst telling you to relax...

you're petrified of waking your mother, mortified as the realisation hits you — but you're too focused on the pleasure and stimulation against your clit, feeling as he pushes into your drooling cunt slowly, his thrusts sloppy and messy as he fucks himself into your tight hole. he's your stepfather, it's wrong for him to look at you like this, to betray your mother's trust due to his own depravity and selfishness, but the sight of you on your back, your cunt all spread out — it's a heavenly sight, something he'd dreamed of.

all könig can focus on is the tightness of your walls around his shaft, pulsating and tightening with each harsh and painful thrust, cooing at you for getting all upset over a stupid, frat boy.

“you needn't cry, sonnenschein ...-- look at you, it’s as if you were made for my big cock, ja? doin’ me proud.” your whimpers only get louder as you're fucked stupid, coming out muffled as you drool around the panties stuffed into your mouth, unable to concentrate on anything but the impact of his heavy balls against your tight rear, before he releases his milky, pearly load deep inside your throbbing cunny, trembling as you squirt against his muscular abdomen.

gazing at his bare abdomen, his black t-shirt slightly rolled up, you coat him in a glimmer of your arousal. the sensation burning through you and pooling at your wet heat as you heave and pant, gasping as he removes the panties from your mouth, stuffing them into his pockets as he slaps his hung length against your slit, rubbing your clit as you tense up and arch your back, looking a little too desperate.

such pathetic, little thing — with your thighs spread open and your cunt forced to take every inch of your perverted stepfather's cock.

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luv4-liv · 1 month

Text

❝First time❞

Pairing: Theodore Nott x Reader

Warnings: Smut. +18. First time (hers). He's older (only two years, but, you know). Unprotected sex (do not do it please¡!).

Summary: You and him have a secret relationship, because he is two years older than you, and in fact, he is your brother's best friend. So, this is the first time they have had sex, basically..

The plot of this One Shot is totally mine and my imagination.

I have changed my W account, so you can find this in Spanish in my new wattpad account (delicateew)

Remember that English is not my language so it may contain several errors, please be patient with me

Don't translate this, or adapt it, or anything like that into Spanish, I'll do it, because it's my language. Thank you!

And I want to apologize for being inactive for too long, just things happened to keep me busy, so so sorry:(

(that's not my gif)

____ was in her room, Theo sitting in the desk chair, reading a book for one of his exams, and she on top of him, her face hidden in his neck.

"Fuck, I already read twenty pages and none of the information stuck in my head."

The girl closed her eyes and stroked the opposite's hair.

"You're going to get frustrated and stressed and it's going to make you sick. Relax and go back to reading them patiently.."

"I have no choice..." she let out a sigh and continued reading the book.

Minutes later, she felt his hand fall heavily on her thigh, but she said nothing.

She opened her eyes as he began to caress her thigh, it felt like tickling, but strange.

She began to hold her breath the moment he squeezed it and began to sink his fingers into it.

It felt strangely good.

Theodore gritted his teeth, trying to concentrate on the book, but every time he felt her breath on his neck or her leg brushing against him, it was getting harder and harder.

He tried to ignore it but to no avail. Finally, he closed the book and set it aside, sighing deeply.

"I can't concentrate like this with you.." she murmured, bending down to stroke his cheek. Nott leaned closer, his lips barely brushing hers before he pulled back with a smile. "I really just can't resist you."

He kissed her slowly, placing his hand carefully on her neck.

He moved his hand up to her jaw, pulling her away from the kiss and ran his face to the side gently, so he could gain access and kiss her neck.

Theo gasped against her neck, running his lips along her soft skin. He tightened his fingers around her waist, letting out a choked breath when she tugged on his hair lightly.

His lips moved to her face again and kissed her.

She let out a barely audible moan as she felt his bulge grow between her legs.

Realizing it, he pulled away from her quickly.

"Fuck, I'm sorry.."

She denied, thinking about what he would answer her.

"I want to."

He looked up at the sound and suppressed a smile to look more serious.

"Are you sure...you don't have to, ____"

"Theo.. I really want to, I promise."

The Slytherin looked into her eyes, seeing that she was serious.

His lips curved into a slow smile. He gave her a kiss on the cheek and then began to unbutton her shirt, until it was off, revealing her bra.

He removed his own shirt and reconnected their lips. The hufflepuff closed her eyes, accepting his kiss. His tongue entered her mouth and ____ let herself be swept up in the moment.

Nott's hands traveled down her back, until they reached the clasp of her bra. He stood there for a few seconds until he managed to remove it, getting rid of it.

He knew she would feel embarrassed and insecure, so he preferred to continue kissing her to make her feel comfortable.

He got up from the chair, carrying her over to the bed and laid her down there.

Theo looked at ____ and slowly removed her skirt and underwear, after that, he unbuttoned her pants letting them fall down along with her boxers and moved even closer, brushing his member against her intimacy while he started to leave kisses all over her face, until he stopped at her lips.

Their lips joined in a deep kiss, with one of his hands he positioned his member at her entrance while with the other he caressed her cheek to soothe her.

Then, she parted the kiss as she felt him slowly enter, he for his part, continued to leave kisses on her cheek and neck as a way of soothing her.

Soon, he was completely inside. He was so careful and gentle that she barely felt a little sting, but it didn't hurt.

"You tell me when you're ready, my sweet." he said waiting for permission to continue or if she felt uncomfortable, to leave things just there.

"You can move now.." he whispered, trying to get used to the strange sensation.

Theo, without taking his eyes off her, slowly, began to move slightly, prioritizing that she was comfortable and felt safe.

When he saw her satisfied face, he began to increase his speed and intensity, but without allowing himself to be so rough or go at the pace he wanted, so as not to hurt her.

Still, ____ began to feel increasing pleasure.

She felt him going in and out so satisfyingly, it felt incredibly good, it was like nothing else in the world.

As it was all happening, she began to scratch his back, and somehow that turned him on more.

He with his hands fixed on her hips, spreading kisses down her neck and leaving several marks along the way.

Theo let out a moan of pleasure that was impossible to contain. His rhythm became louder and faster, feeling himself getting closer to the edge.

"Merlin, I love you so much.."

He felt her walls tighten around him and seconds later he felt her cum.

It took only a couple more thrusts to stop, withdraw from inside her and cum, dripping into her abdomen.

"Oh, Merlin..." she relaxed her body and closed her eyes completely exhausted.

"Oh, my sweet, you can't fall asleep like this, let's clean you up first." he said stroking her hair.

____ felt like sleeping a lot, she didn't know if it was just because it was the first time, but if she closed her eyes for a moment more, she wasn't going to open them for a couple of hours..

"Although I admit you look pretty all smeared with my cum." he laughed

"Theo!" she rolled her eyes smiling.

She'd had her first time.

And she was pretty sure no one could have done it better than he did.

#one shot #+18 content #harry potter #harry potter smut #theodore nott #theodore nott smut #slytherin #slytherpuff #hufflepuff #slytherin boys #slytherin boys react #harry potter oneshot #theodore nott oneshot #wattpad #lorenzo zurzolo

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ningvory · 30 days

Text

troublemaker — huh yunjin

cw: teacher x student, brat reader, mean yunjin, public sex, fingering, facesitting (y. receiving), pussy eating (both receiving), degration, overstimulation, cum eating, dacryphilia, humiliation kink, mentions of gp chaewon, she takes 1 picture of you and sends it to chae, not rlly proofread..

word count: 1.1k

anon ask? yes!

“so..where’s my homework, y/n?” your professor, yunjin questioned you. her eyes were looking you up and down through her glasses with a small smirk on her face.

it was about 5 minutes after class ended, her last class of the day which happens to be your last class. she always tells you to come see her after class, in which you always do but you never know her reasons to why. you clearly show that you honestly don’t care for what she has to say and her stupid homework assignment.

which is what you’re doing now, standing infront of her desk with your body resting on your right hip, lollipop in your mouth full on knowing that no candy is allowed in her classroom, and your hand is tapping away at your phone and it’s audible that you’re texting someone due to your phone ringer being on. your just ignoring her question and her lingering stare on your body.

“i’m talking to you, y/n.” her voice is more stern, causing you to roll your eyes and turn your phone off. your eyes finally meeting hers for the first time today.

“look, i don’t have your stupid assignment, kay?” you say, tone harsh and sarcastically smiling at her.

“watch your tone with me.” yunjin states, eyes darkening and walking towards you.

“hah. make me.” you say, looking up at her eyes. doubting that she would actually do anything. it’s not like she ever did do something whenever you broke her rules or gave her attitude.

but suddenly your body was pushed down to her desk, before taking your skirt and panties off.

“wh-what are you doing?” you question her trying to raise your body up but to no avail.

“teaching you a lesson. now be a good slut and take it.” she says before kneeling down and immediately sucking on your clit making you let out a surprised moan.

you were trying to find anything to grip onto, any coherent thought completely vanished from your mind and only incoherent words that were cut off by your moans and whines spilled out of your mouth. you hands were tangled in her hair, trying to pull her head impossibly closer to you cunt, not caring if she was suffocating but you doubt she cared from the way she was moaning into your cunt.

“not stopping until your fucked completely dumb and overstimulated, pretty.” yunjin mutters before diving right back into your cunt, nothing but her slurps and your whines filled her classroom.

she hums against your dripping cunt, tongue deep in your hole and her nose nuzzled right against your clit. your moans and whines were like music to her ears, it excites her that she’s got you this submissive for her. she knows that you’ll sound even prettier when she splits your tight cunny with her strap-on.

“you like this you whore don’t you?” she pulls away before she plunges two of her fingers deep into your cunt making you squeal.

it’s not like you can answer her with a complete coherent sentence. but yunjin’s too impatient to wait for you to form a sentence. “got you too dumb to speak already, dummy?” she taunts, landing a harsh smack to you clit, making you jolt and moan.

yunjin leans back into your drooling cunny, placing sloppy kisses onto your clit before she sucks on your puffy clit once more.

you start to grind your hips onto her face until she pins your hips down.

“ah! yunjin—g’na cum!” you moan before cumming all over her face.

she didnt seem to care that your cum was dipping from her chin and on her table because once your vision turned backed to nomal, she’s latching her mouth onto your juicy cunny once more.

“no! n-no more please, i-i’m sorry!!” you cry, tears falling down your face and desperately pushing her head away from your overstimulated cunt.

she moans into your cunt from the way you tug at her hair but ignored your pleads, forcing your legs that were closing in on her head open. continuing to swirl and suck on your bundle of nerves.

you can’t do anything but to sit there and take all that she’s giving you, body too weak and nothing but moans were coming out of your mouth.

she sucks all on your cunt, drinking up all the cum before pulling away with a loud pop!

she finally stands up from her kneeling position. pulling her pencil skirt down and her soaked panties off.

“your so cute when your an obedient slut that’s not being a lil troublemaker.” she mocks before climbing up your body.

“i fucked you so good it’s only right to return the favor, right?” yunjin asks, letting you nod your head, looking up at her with nothing but lust.

she giggles before sitting completely down on your face, all of her weight landing on you. and you to work immediately, arms wrapping about her legs and letting her roll her hips onto you face.

“you’re such a good slut when someone fucks it into you.” yunjin moans, rocking her hips slowly into your mouth.

she began to squeeze your head in between her plush thighs when your nose hits her clit everytime she rolls her hips into you. she begins to grip on your hair, hips rolling quicker from the pleasure, “fuck! just like that, s-so—fuck! so good for me,” she moans.

“what would y-your friend, chaewon think about—ngh!— think about you getting bitched by your professor?” she questions you, making you moan into her dripping cunt, hips jolting up into the air. “fuck, she’d probably cum in her pants just from watching me use your pretty lil’ face. i see the way she looks at you, hiding her boner,” she continued through staggered breath.

“oh fuck!” she moans loudly, her back is arched, squeezing her legs around your head, “r-right there! holy shi—”

she cums all over your face, slowly grinding her dripping cunt down onto your face until she finally gets up and lets you breathe.

yunjin sits down on your tummy, grabbing your phone before forcing you to unlock it. she does a few tapping before she smiles at you, “smile for the picture,” she says as the camera flashes. creating a photo of your face covered in globs of her cum and tear stains.

“let’s see what your pervy little friend chaewon thinks of this.” she says as she types something up on your phone before you hear the sending message.

“we should do this more often, only next time. bring chaewon over so i can fuck the both of you dumb.”

#♡.yunjin #♡.lesserafim #♡.nabi’s asks #wlw smut #le sserafim yunjin #le sserafim x fem reader #le sserafim smut #yunjin smut #huh yunjin smut #kpop smut

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a-little-unsteddie · 5 months

Text

stuck in your throat || a/b/o

hi so today is @lexirosewrites’s birthday today and like,, idk three or so weeks ago she followed me (hi lexi <3 happy birthday <3 hope today has been fun <3) and to celebrate both of those things i started writing an omegaverse fic, and i wanted it done by today but it is grew a mind of its’ own and now it’s much bigger than i thought it’d be so instead of the full fic, have a snippet <3

again, happy birthday lexi <3

“Hello?” Steve answered, having learned to not open the call with who was answering without knowing who was calling from one too many scam calls

“Is this Steve Harrington?” A soft feminine voice asked, taking Steve by surprise.

“May I ask who’s calling?” Steve asked, not willing to concede his identity until he knew it wasn’t someone looking to sell him ‘Alpha Pills’ or something just as ridiculous.

“Of course! My name is Chrissy Cunningham, you sent in an application for being a full time nanny and tutor?” She responded with a cheerful voice. “I can’t <i>really</i> go much more in depth without an NDA being signed.”

Recognition zapped through Steve’s body and he sat up in his seat. “Oh! Yes, I’m Steve. Um. I’d be happy to sign an NDA, just may I ask why?”

“Yes, you may! My client is a big fan of privacy and only agreed to hire someone if they were under an NDA for the protection of their pup.” aaand all of Steve’s anxiety surrounding the NDA pretty much melted away. Sure, maybe it was a bit much to do, and sure, now he was dying with curiosity to know just <i>who</i> he had ended up applying to, but the knowledge that the NDA was for the protection of the pup soothed any anxiety Steve had originally felt about signing an NDA. In fact, it kind of made his omega perk up. He shook off the feeling, focusing on Chrissy.

“That’s actually really relieving to hear,” Steve said with a laugh. “When or where can I sign the NDA?” he questioned, wondering when Robin would be home so he could tell her.

“Well, first, you and I will do a preliminary interview, just like any other job interview. Then, if all goes well, I’ll send you an email containing the NDA for you to review and sign,” Chrissy explained clearly and cheerfully. “After you sign the NDA, my client will perform an in-person interview and then we’ll go from there.”

“That all seems pretty straight forward so far,” Steve replied, standing from where he had been lounging on the couch. He walked to the kitchen, where he and Robin had put up a magnetic whiteboard calendar to fill with each of their schedules and plans. He grabbed the blue marker, his color, and prepared to jot down when they’d have the interview.

“Perfect! Happy to hear it,” Chrissy said with an audible smile.

“When will the interview with you be?” Steve asked, biting his lip as he stared at the calendar, which had sparsely been marked with his blue marker, even since starting this job hunt. Robin’s plans were in red, and was much more abundant due to having three part time jobs.

“Well, as soon as possible, really. If you’re available now, we could take care of it right away.” the woman responded, sounding like she was walking into another room.

“Oh!” Steve exclaimed, recapping the marker and returning it to the pen holder. “Yes, of course. I’m available now.”

“Perfect!” Chrissy’s voice sounded from Steve’s phone as the omega walked back to the living room and sat on the couch. “So, starting off pretty easy here, what made you apply for this position?”

Steve thought back and grimaced at the reminder that it was Robin who had submitted his application to this particular job. He wasn’t about to admit that, though, and quickly found a more appropriate response.

“Well, I love taking care of pups, and I just got my teacher’s license a month ago,” Steve explained, which wasn’t a lie, so he figured it was probably as good of an answer as any. “I also saw that this job traveled, and my best friend thought that it’d be good for me.”

“Yes, that was going to be part of this conversation, too. So, you’re obviously alright with the traveling, then?” Chrissy asked and Steve heard what he thought could be pen scratching as she wrote notes. He swallowed thickly, suddenly anxious about what she was writing. He decided to ignore his anxiety, even as his scent soured around him with it.

“Oh, yes, traveling is more than okay,” Steve agreed immediately, “but it’s more important to me that I’ll be taking care of a pup, if I’m honest.”

This statement seemed to pique Chrissy’s attention, as the writing stopped for a moment. “Why is that?” she eventually asked.

Steve winced, wondering if he should be up front about it or not. If Robin were here, she would insist that he was honest. He decided on a half-truth.

“I’ve always wanted pups, and a lot of them,” Steve admitted, fidgeting with a loose piece of thread on the couch. He switched which arm was holding the phone, as he had started to get a little sore from holding it up for so long. “But I don’t have a partner, so I can’t really have my own right now. I discovered through babysitting for one of my neighbors that I have a knack for taking care of pups.”

The scratching noise was back as Chrissy listened to his responses. Steve was nervous he wasn’t doing well, but figured that it wasn’t going bad if she wasn’t suddenly calling the interview short.

“Your resume says that you’re good in high stress situations,” Chrissy said after a couple seconds of silence as she wrote down whatever notes she was taking. Steve briefly wondered if he should be doing the same thing. “I’m going to give you an example scenario, and you’re going to tell me how you’d respond.”

“Sounds simple enough,” Steve agreed, trying not to let his voice betray how anxious he was.

“For the sake of simplicity, we’ll say the pup’s name is Rosie,” she informed him before she continued to describe the scenario. “You’re taking Rosie to the park, when suddenly there is a crowd of people surrounding you and you lose sight of her. What do you do?”

Steve thought the scenario was odd, but not ‘out there’ enough to alarm him. He thought about his answer for a moment before replying.

“I would try to follow her scent, first, because that will usually lead me to any pup I’ve babysat. If that doesn’t work, I will call out for her. If the situation is bad enough, I would contact the authorities, and either you or Rosie’s father.” he paused for a second before continuing, trying to make sure he covered all of his bases. “But honestly? If Rosie is small enough, I would have rather carried her once I saw the crowd, or hold her hand, for the reason of lowering my chances of separation.”

Silence that’s only broken up by the scratching of pen against paper followed, and Steve was suddenly anxious that he answered incorrectly. He answered what he would do if it were his own pup, but what if that wasn’t right? What if he wasn’t cut out for this job?

“Alright, next scenario,” Chrissy said, moving swiftly onto the next one without commenting on his answer; Steve didn’t know if he preferred her not acknowledging it or if he would prefer to be told his answer was shitty up front. The next few scenarios were just as oddly specific, but Steve answered them exactly as he did the first one. He tried to not overthink his answers too much because between each one there would be a stretch of time that Chrissy used to presumably write his answers down.

“One last question and then we should be good to move forward.” Chrissy said a good twenty minutes of questions later. “When would you be available to start working?”

Steve’s eyebrows raised, surprised that he was seemingly, maybe being offered the job. “Um—immediately. I would need time to pack, but other than that, I’m free.”

“Wonderful,” Chrissy said cheerfully. “Alright, now it’s your turn. Do you have any questions for me?”

Steve hummed, trying to go through his usual list of questions he asked during interviews that hadn't already been answered and came up empty. “Not at the moment, but I’ll make sure to write any I think of down, if I do.”

“Perfect! So, I will consult with my client, and I have a few other applicants that are interested, but so far, you are my top pick, but I don’t make the decisions,” Chrissy laughed, as if Steve was in on the joke. He laughed with her, not knowing what else he should have done. So, maybe not a job offer, but it sounded promising anyway. “I will be in contact in a few days, three at most.”

“Sounds good, thank you so much for considering me, Chrissy,” he responded with a smile, hoping to leave one last good impression.

#whdbehsh i literally screamed when you followed me lexi #and then showed it to everyone i’m friends with in steddie #and was like ‘well now i GOTTA write an omegaverse fic’#snd they were like ‘well you don’t gotta’#and i was like ‘no i do. and i will.’#and then i did 😌#steve harrington #chrissy cunningham #eventually eddie munson #steddie #steve x eddie #pre steddie #tw a/b/o #tw omegaverse #oh heck also #mentions robin buckley #stuck in your throat #unsteddie writing

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inou-ie · 6 months

Text

Pairing(s): Rahu and Shalom x female reader

Warnings: NSFW, transfem Rahu, transfem Shalom, double penetration, overstimulation, breeding, threesome, polyamory.

MDNI

Waking up with two women on either side of you, holding you tightly as if they're afraid to lose you, made you feel protected and loved. However, you couldn't deny the soreness in your body from being held tightly in that position throughout the night.

You groaned, attempting to sit up and free yourself from their grip, but it was to no avail. Rahu and Shalom held you tightly, and from the way they were embracing you, you could already discern which one aimed to protect you and which one desired to dominate you.

"Where are you going...?" Rahu opened her eyes, gently touching your cheek to turn your head and make you look at her. "Bathroom? I could come with you." she suggested before sitting up. She released her hold on you to stretch her limbs.

However, the moment Rahu let go of you, a pair of arms tightly wrapped around your waist. "What's this? Are you paying more attention to her?" you heard Shalom whisper near your ear, pulling you closer towards her body.

You couldn't help but chuckle when Rahu tried to snatch you away, only for Shalom to steal a kiss from your cheek, looking at Rahu with a teasing grin.

"You..." Rahu growled lowly, quickly kissing your cheek as well before glaring at Shalom.

"What? It's not like you couldn't do the things I did." Shalom said, her gentle smile never leaving her face.

It was an everyday occurrence. They were like a loyal and protective dog, one who wanted to keep you all to herself, and a mischievous and graceful cat, one who sought to claim you as her own.

They both knew there was nothing to fight about because you loved them both equally. Still, they couldn't help but vie for your love and affection.

The only thing they could agree on was their desire to make you feel good and happy. Even though they argue while they pleasure you, they share the same goal: to make you feel like you're on cloud nine.

One of the things you find amusing is when Rahu and Shalom make you toss a coin. If it lands on tails, then it'll be Shalom who gets to fill you up first; if it's heads, it'll be Rahu.

Their faces while they wait for you are truly adorable, filled with anticipation and excitement... completely different when they have you writhing and whimpering while they're deep inside you.

You watched them closely, their gazes following the movement of your hands as you tossed the coin in the air. The moment it landed in your hand, they moved closer to get a better look.

"It's… tails." you said, showing the coin to them. If Rahu had a tail, it would be drooping to the ground now, making her look like a puppy who had been accidentally kicked.

Shalom chuckled, wrapping her arms around your neck from behind as she looked at Rahu. "Too bad, huh?" Shalom said in a teasing tone, sticking her tongue out, which made Rahu frown. "Don't tease her too much…" you told Shalom, but she just shrugged.

"Alright, let's get you ready." Shalom is quick to remove your clothes, her hands were gentle but you could feel the desperation in her touches. While Rahu moved behind you, making you rest your back against her body while she embraces you.

Shalom started to remove her clothing, one by one, slowly... making sure to maintain eye contact with you. Your gaze quickly shifted towards her erection, and oh how big she is... makes you wonder how can such thing even fit inside of you.

"You ready?" Shalom asked, her hands gently caressing the soft flesh of your thighs before spreading them slowly to reveal your already wet cunt.

As you mumble a barely audible "...ready." she lifts your chin with her finger and commands, "Eyes on me first." Your gaze remains locked onto hers as she moves even closer, bringing her length right up against your soaking wet heat.

"Open your mouth." she whispered softly, her gentle smile guiding you into submission. Without hesitation, you obey and open your mouth wide for her as she leans closer. Her tongue swiftly darts into your mouth, causing a soft moan to escape your lips.

As Shalom's tongue slowly explores your mouth, she teases your clit with the tip of her cock. The gentle pressure against it causes your toes to curl and hips to buck in search of more contact.

The tip of her cock gently crushing your clit, Shalom's hold on you tightens. Rahu's hands find their way to your breasts, fondling them gently as she begins to bite and lick your earlobe before pushing her tongue in. The combination of sensations is almost too much for you to handle, causing your eyes to roll back in pleasure.

Shalom and Rahu's teasing leaves you trembling with anticipation. When Shalom finally pulls away, a string of saliva connects the two of you as your breathing becomes ragged. Tears form in your eyes from the overwhelming pleasure they have given you.

Shalom purred, "So adorable... we haven't even started yet." She gave you one last kiss on the lips before holding your thighs apart and keeping you still with Rahu's help. "You're already dripping wet." she said as her cockhead ran along your wet folds, causing your body to shudder in anticipation.

"Please, hurry..." you mumble, offering yourself to her completely. Shalom aligned her cock in front of your entrance and slowly began to penetrate you. The feeling of her thick length pressing against your tight pussy is almost too much for you to handle as she finally pushed all the way inside.

As you felt yourself being stretched by Shalom's cock, your back arched slightly. Rahu held onto you tighter and leaned in to place soft kisses on your neck before nibbling gently at your flesh. The pressure of Rahu's cock bulging through her pants against your back adds another layer of excitement for you.

"You're so cute..." Rahu whispered in your ear, her voice filled with anticipation. She carefully undid her pants to free her throbbing cock, which was already leaking precum. Shifting positions, she positioned herself near your face as she pleaded silently for you to take her cock deep into your mouth.

As Shalom begins to thrust inside of you in a steady rhythm, your hand reaches out and grasps Rahu's cock. The moment your skin makes contact, Rahu groans loudly and her hips buck forward. Her eyes plead with you for more as she begs for you to take her entire length into your throat.

As you open your mouth wide enough to take Rahu's cock inside, she lets out a soft groan. You begin by swirling your tongue around the head before slowly taking her entire length into your mouth before starting to suck on it eagerly.

Shalom watches intently as she speeds up her thrusts, hitting deeper and deeper inside of you with each stroke. "Pay attention to me too..." Shalom's hand squeezes your breast roughly, causing you to moan muffled sounds around Rahu's cock.

"She's taking us so well," Shalom says, looking at Rahu. "I bet she can take more." Rahu nods in agreement as her eyes never leave yours. "You know how to stop us when it gets too much for you, right?" She asks softly, a faint smile playing on her lips.

Feeling reassured by your nod, Rahu begins thrusting her hips harder into your mouth while still maintaining care not to hurt or overwhelm you. Her hand fixes your hair gently before moving down to caress the side of your face lovingly.

Meanwhile, Shalom continues to drive deep inside of you with steady rhythm, the sensation of being taken so carefully and intimately by both women is exhilarating beyond words.

The room is filled with the lewd, wet sounds of your mouth sucking on Rahu's cock and the squelching sounds of Shalom's entire length sliding in and out of your pussy. The slapping of flesh against flesh echoes through the air.

You start to tear up from the overwhelming pleasure as Rahu's cock throbs against the back of your throat, causing you to gulp down all the precum that leaks out. Shalom grabs both your arms and pulls you closer to her as she starts pounding into you.

As Shalom takes control, her hips buck wildly against yours, accelerating her thrusts deep inside of you. You can't help but let go of Rahu's cock momentarily as Shalom's cockhead presses against your cervix in every powerful stroke. Rahu notices this immediately and holds onto your head firmly while shoving her entire length back into your mouth.

Rahu's voice is full of desire and desperation as she mumbles, "Just a little more..." Her hand tightens on the back of your head to keep you in place while Shalom's cock bulges out in your stomach with every powerful thrust.

Your cries of pleasure are muffled by Rahu's cock as both women reach their climaxes at the same time, filling you with their essence. Thick ropes of cum flow down your throat from Rahu while Shalom buries her entire length deep inside of you, pressing against your cervix and filling every inch of your womb with her seed.

"You're so good..." Rahu praises as she holds onto your head tightly for a moment before releasing it slowly, allowing some air to enter your lungs after she's filled you so fully. She watches as Shalom continues thrusting her hips hard against yours, pressing her cock deeper and harder against your cervix, pushing all of her cum into every corner of your womb.

Your eyes lock onto Rahu's throbbing cock, wet with a mixture of her cum and your saliva. The urge to clean it off overtakes you as you lean forward instinctively, taking her cock back into your mouth once more. You suck on it hard enough for Rahu to let out a deep groan of pleasure.

Shalom pants heavily, her thrusts slowing down and eventually stopping completely. She remains buried deep inside of you for just a few more moments longer – savoring the feeling of being so deeply connected with you in every possible way.

Shalom smirks down at you with satisfaction, her chest still heaving from the exertion. "Good girl," she praises softly as she carefully pulls out of your pussy. "Did it feel good?"

Your pussy grips around Shalom's cock deliciously as it finally releases its hold on you, leaving behind a trail of her cum. You let go of Rahu's cock with a satisfied pop before speaking up, "It was amazing." As Rahu's cum trickles down your chin, Shalom leans in close to wipe it away softly for you.

"We're not done yet... I still have my turn to fill you up." Rahu quickly helps you sit up and then easily lifts your entire body weight onto her lap so that you're sitting down on top of her.

Your pussy rubs against Rahu's cock teasingly as it continues to throb and leak pre-cum beneath you. You lean forward slightly, offering yourself more fully to her.

Rahu's arms wrap around you tightly as she lays back slowly, holding onto your body close to her chest. "Ride me?" she asks in a pleading tone, causing you to laugh softly at her eagerness.

"Please..." Rahu adds with an endearing blush on her cheeks, her hips bucking upwards to rub her cock against your folds teasingly.

"Of course, how can I refuse you?" You lean against Rahu's shoulder for support as she holds her cock still, allowing you to sink down onto it slowly. Her low growl of pleasure fills the room when your wet pussy easily surrounds and engulfs her thick length.

Rahu's hands reach up towards yours, interlocking your fingers tightly together. Her hips buck upwards slightly in response to the sensation, urging you deeper onto her cock with each thrust. You feel yourself opening up more fully around her girth, welcoming every inch of her into your core as if it were made specifically for her.

As you lose yourself in the pleasure of riding Rahu's cock, a pair of hands snake around your waist from behind. Shalom whispers into your ear, "Aren't you forgetting about me?" She gently pushes on you, making you bend down slightly so that your breasts are pressing against Rahu's chest and your ass is now presented to her temptingly.

"Can you take us both?" Shalom asks with a teasing grin as she begins caressing your ass gently, sending shivers of anticipation through your body. Her fingers trail up and down your crack, spreading your cheeks open wider for her inspection. You feel her hot breath against your sensitive skin before you suddenly feel something blunt and hard pressing against your entrance from behind.

"Shalom, wai– ah..nggh!" Your eyes go wide with surprise at the sudden intrusion as Shalom slowly starts pushing her own cock inside of you from behind – stretching you out further than ever before.

You can't see Shalom's face, but you just know she must be grinning widely down at the sight of both her and Rahu taking turns filling your body completely.

Rahu holds onto you tightly against her chest, not letting go even as she thrusts powerfully inside of you in perfect sync with Shalom behind you. Her cock hits all the right spots inside of you, sending waves upon waves of pleasure coursing through every nerve ending in your body. As for Shalom, each thick inch that disappears into your ass is met with a moan from deep within her throat.

Your pussy grips around Rahu's cock tightly while your ass clenches greedily onto Shalom's invading length. It feels like being filled up by two impossibly large and hard members at once.

As Rahu continues to thrust into your pussy, her breathing becomes more labored and she lets out a deep moan of pleasure. "So good," she mutters between ragged gasps for air. "So tight..."

Meanwhile, Shalom's cock inside you feels like it's hitting every single one of your sensitive nerves as she takes advantage of the position to grind against your ass cheeks with each powerful thrust. Her free hand finds its way down to play with your clit, sending shockwaves of pleasure straight from your core to every inch of your body.

As Rahu continues to thrust into your pussy with all her might, her tongue circles around your nipple before she finally takes it into her mouth, sucking on it with such intensity that you feel like you might float away from the sensation. Your entire body feels like it's melting under their combined assault.

You don't know how much longer you can hold out as Rahu continues to thrust powerfully inside of you while Shalom pistons in and out of your ass, claiming every last bit of your attention for themselves.

Your voice is barely a whisper as you find yourself on the brink of orgasm. "Too much..." you murmur hoarsely, your soft whimpers filling the room now that your loud moans have subsided.

Rahu's tongue flicks against one of your nipples while Shalom pinches and rolls your clit between her fingers – each touch sending shivers down your spine. Their pace doesn't slow even for a moment.

Shalom's voice is hushed, almost a murmur against your skin. "Shh... you can take it." Her thrusts grow deeper and harder as she matches Rahu's pace, pushing both of you closer to the edge.

And then finally – with one last powerful push from behind – Shalom finds her own release inside of you while Rahu follows suit moments later. Their combined moans fill the room as their hot seed spills into and around your body in a thick, sticky mess.

Your body feels completely filled to the brim with their combined weight and presence as Shalom pins you between her own body and Rahu's. You can feel every inch of them against your skin, from their chests pressed against yours all the way down to where they're still buried deep inside of you.

Just as you thought they were done, Rahu held your head still with one hand, burying it in the crook of her neck while the other kept you pressed against her body. Shalom, on the other hand, kept her hands around your hips. It felt overwhelmingly good when they resumed their pounding into your holes.

This time, their movements became more intense. Losing themselves as they started slamming their hips in ecstasy as they enjoy the sounds of your moans and cries. It's as if they were racing towards their climax using your holes, yet you still found yourself enjoying every moment of it.

Your body unconsciously tries to get away from the overwhelming pleasure, but Rahu and Shalom hold onto you tightly. They continue pounding into you like two animals in heat as their loud groans and your moans fill the room.

You grit your teeth, trying your best to keep up with them both. Every inch of you is stretched taut around their cocks; it feels like being taken by a pair of wild beasts whose only goal is to claim you completely for themselves.

"Fuck..." your voice trembles along with your body as you let out a hoarse cry, overwhelmed by the intense sensations coursing through every inch of you. You can barely form the word as Rahu's cock pulverizes your womb again and again – filling it up to bursting point with her thick seed while Shalom's invading length continues to stretch and fill your ass greedily from behind.

Shalom leans back slightly to get a better view of your body trembling and shaking as you lie flatly on Rahu's chest, unable to move an inch anymore. Rahu stares down at your fucked out face with an expression that mixes tenderness with pride.

"How cute..." Rahu murmurs softly before adding with a laugh, "If you keep being this adorable, we'll just keep going for the whole day and night if that's what it takes."

At the mention of more pleasure, Shalom quickly interjects, "That's exactly what she wants. Let's give it to her." She grabs a handful of your hair, pulling your head back so that both women can see clearly into your eyes – searching for any sign of discomfort or pain. But there is none; instead all they find reflected back at them is your satisfied expression, eyes asking for more.

As Shalom lets go of your hair, you collapse back onto Rahu's chest with a contented sigh. Rahu quickly pat your head lovingly before leaning down to place a soft kiss against it – as if she hadn't just filled every inch of your womb with her cum.

"There, there..." Rahu murmurs soothingly. "We'll give you more... much more." She promises, her voice full of unwavering commitment towards satisfying all of your desires.

While Shalom planted soft kisses against your back, you could still feel their cocks throbbing inside of you – a reminder that neither woman intends to stop anytime soon but you could tell they're holding back to give you comfort from how roughly they treated you earlier.

"How about I join Rahu inside this tight little hole of yours?" Shalom's sudden suggestion echoes in the room as she slowly pulls out of your ass, leaving it gaping and leaking her cum steadily. Her eyes then drift down to observe how tightly your pussy grips onto Rahu's throbbing cock.

Rahu's voice holds a note of concern as she shakes her head slightly, replying to Shalom's suggestion. "I don't think she can handle that..." Despite her words, you felt Rahu's cock twitch inside you. You knew how much she wants to try it as well.

Shalom grabbed your hair once again. As she pulls back your head, her other hand rubbing soothingly against the side of your face. "I'm not asking you, Rahu..." She starts off teasingly before adding with a sultry chuckle, "I'm asking our beautiful girl right here... So, want to try? Don't you want to feel us both inside your tight little pussy?" Her words send shivers down your spine and between your legs.

Shalom's eyes light up with anticipation at your nod of consent, her own smile widening into something predatory yet somehow endearing all at once. "Good girl..." She coos softly against your ear.

With that, they both promised to be gentle with you... but the moment they felt how tight you were around them, they immediately went wild. Slamming their cocks into you alternately, making you scream and cry out in pleasure as they took turns hitting your cervix. You were so stuffed full of them that all you could do was pant for air while drooling from the sheer ecstasy of it all.

"...more... so good..." you whispered, your voice carrying the passion and desire in it. They fucked you for hours on end, only changing positions when Rahu picked you up in her strong arms while they continued thrusting into you deeply. All thoughts were driven from your mind as you sobbed in pleasure, your head resting on Rahu's shoulder, biting her hard when it gets too overwhelming. Despite their ferocity, they made sure to comfort you with praises and soft kisses throughout, making you feel exhausted yet satisfied.

#inou works #ptn women x reader #ptn rahu #ptn shalom #rahu smut #shalom smut #ptn smut #path to nowhere smut #path to nowhere rahu #path to nowhere shalom

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thebibliosphere · 2 years

Text

This is more of a problem on Facebook and Twitter, but there are some fellow authors who get a tad... upset when you talk about money and royalty earnings.

Needless to say, my frankness about how royalties work and just how little many of us are earning from our labor has drawn the ire of a few people, even here on Tumblr.hell.

I'm not particularly bothered by this. In my view, they're the same people who won't discuss wages in the workplace because they don't want anyone else to earn what they do. They know the system is unfairly rigged, but they like it that way because they're scared if more people are educated about how things work, they'll lose whatever competitive edge they think they have, thus enforcing the status quo.

Needless to say, I don't care for this view.

I'm very much a "holy shit, two cakes" kind of creator. I also very firmly believe in pulling people up behind me and spreading the wealth of information that was shared freely with me by other like-minded individuals who also believe that the mysteries around publishing are gatekeeping bullshit and everyone deserves the chance to earn money from their creative endeavors, not just the people who can afford to.

Anyway, David Gaughran's 'Let's Get Digital: How To Self-Publish And Why You Should' is an invaluable resource for indie authors and provides great insight into how publishing and distribution work. It is available for free through the retailers listed on his website.

If you don't want to publish exclusively through Amazon, draft2digital.com does global ebook and also paperback distribution. (I've only used it for ebooks, but I'll be trying out their paperback options for my next book.) You can pair it up with a books2read account to create easy-to-post buy links. Draft2Digital also allows for distribution through library lending services like Overdrive. So that's neat. (NB: if you use d2d, you can't use Kindle Unlimited, so be aware of what links you have active and where if you decide to enroll in KU. You can always opt for wide distribution again once your KU time expires.)

D2D also recently partnered with FindawayVoices.com for audiobook distribution. You can find voice actors there, or you can upload your own files if you already have them. You can submit to Audible through them, too, but you'll earn a pittance more if you upload directly through Audible. Findaway also allows for library lending distribution through Libby and several other global equivalents.

If you need ISBNs, you can buy them cheaper in bulk from Bowker at myidentifiers.com

Individual storefront options like Payhip.com and Gumroad.com are also great ways to allow people to buy directly from you, though I soured on Gumroad after the whole NFT thing and their CEO harassing people on Twitter over it. Payhip is now my preferred storefront, and as an added bonus, they calculate VAT in European countries as well, so that's one less thing for me as an indie author to work out. As an added bonus, Payhip can be directly integrated into your author website if you have one. It's a feature I'll be implementing soon.

itch.io also allows for the sale and distribution of ebook files, though I haven't used it yet.

If you don't have the means to hire a cover designer or the means to do it yourself in photoshop, Canva.com has some decent-ish ebook templates. Just make sure the images and fonts you're using have the right licenses for commercial use.

Editing and formatting are also extremely important, though I know not everyone can afford them. If you can, I highly suggest doing so and shelling out extra to have them format your work across mediums. Ebook formatting is different from paperback formatting, and it can look very strange if you just try to format an ebook into a pdf. It is a skill you can teach yourself (plenty of youtube videos) if you really want to, but I prefer to throw money at my editors, who provide formatting as an additional service. Whatever you can afford to do to streamline the process is money well spent.

Also, do not be shy about using affiliate links to sell your work. Authors lose a solid chunk of money to places like Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Apple, etc., in distribution fees. Whatever pennies you can scrape back through affiliate links for directing traffic to those sites is hard-earned--and it is literal pennies sometimes. You can also integrate any affiliate links you do have into draft2digital, so they auto-generate, which is handy.

When it comes to paperbacks, BookShop.org offers the best affiliate earnings, and a percentage of the sale goes toward supporting indie bookstores. They do not take that percentage from your earnings, they pay it themselves. Libro.FM is the audiobook equivalent of BookShop.org, and they also give a percentage of sales to supporting indie book stores.

Anyway, I hope that helps someone. Good luck out there.

Also, if you're the person who sent me the irate email about "giving away trade secrets," feel free to die mad about it. 😘

#long post #indie publishing #indie author #author resources #I've posted all this before #but I figure it never hurts to post it again #also lol at that email #what a sad and bitter view

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