#it's ''roots'' not toys. tf
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Tf eu #5 rambles under the cut
Obviously, the most important thing is that MY WIFE IS HEEEERE YEAAAAAH. Love how they lettered her name here omg
She's wonderful!!!! Her bait and switch intro was funny (but please don't actually corner The Girl One into a love interest) and her stunt saving Carly was so cool, I'm glad we're establishing her right. I wish she didn't look so much Like That, but at least DWJ is as willing to deform her for action as anyone else. Her buccal fat removal look makes her look like a skull, which would be cool if it were on puporse, but it's not so. I like the shade they picked for her, is more of a lilac but it looks pink with the rest of the color palette and meshes well with the setting.
This series is really good at the appel to the inner child thing, because I'm like genuinely excited to see the Autobots have the advantage for once!! But ofc, they can't really because the arc ends next issue and they're not gonna have a decisive win until that.
Tho, Optimus and Cliffjumper are carrying the Autobots in regards to being the heroes we root for. I mean, Arcee and Jazz are very cool and that has their appeal, but I do wish once things have settled and they can interact in more situations that aren't just life and death, because so far I feel like we only get a good grasp of who Optimus and Cliffjumper are as individuals, their personalities. I want to see what makes each Autobot unique.
Speaking of, still absolutely eating the Carly and CJ dynamic. She is great and when she said that what does if matter if she's at risk when her family is dead and Spike is in a coma, that reallly got to me. It's unwise, but Cliffjumper relating to her and bringing her to give her a sense of closure it's really good. I think that this kind of bringing the kid character into danger would be because Carly sneaked her way, or because Cliffjumper would disregard orders for the hell of it. But like this feeeling of "I know how she feels and I would want come in her place too" works really well.
Also, I care about Sparky now, lol. Not that at hated him before. I'm not a fan of the first page, as cool at it look, because comparing OP to the US military like the later are the good guy is mmmm... but I'm loving his rapport with Optimus. And also there's how he looks when he's told the generator will give them a decade of power. It's not like "amazing tech woaaah!" It's softer like... this isn't an affluent town, these are people who are used to struggle and they just lost their power source. Ten years of power like that is a godsend that he can hardly believe that will do the whole town a lot of good and he cares about that. Maybe I'm reading too much into it but you know.
And ooooh dear, I was already unwell over Optimus getting his Megatron's canon arm grafted, but I understimated what seein him actually shoot the canon would do to me. I need... several moments.... the fight scenes are pretty gone but this one was particulary brutal. Optimus is really fearsome. And given how he has been so carefully characterized as this bleeding heart figure, seeing him decimating his enemies so efficient is quite something. And by something I mean gap moe. We love to see it.
RIP Reflector, your camera jokes will be missed, but that sequence was amazing lmao
Love seeing Optimus hit Starscream where it hurts. But OP saying that last time Starscream was cowering from Megatron's canon brings a lot of questions about the sequence of events in the Ark (which we'll get to see in teh special it seems). And I've been wondering if Starscream had something to do with Megatron falling or dissapearing or whatever, this does make it seem more like it and well, if that's the case I wonder how the rest of the Cons will react.
Man, the Autobots really shined this time and I already forgot what I was thinking about the Decepticons!! But hey!!! Thundercracker is here!!!!!!!! My guy!!! Given that his characterization as per toy bio is the guy that's not so sure about the cause, I wonder how he'll take it when he find out what really happened to Skywarp.
Also, are the Constructicons newly made??
Anyway, good stuff.
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So I'm (slowly) rewatching Transformers: Victory...
And Zod have mercy, I'm having to power through it.
See, when I did the pictures of the Dinoforce toys for @tfwiki, I saw how their fiction sections were massively empty, and I thought to myself "self, these guys are major characters in Japanese canon who are VERY VERY LIKELY going to get new toys soon (the Legacy Core Class Dinobots are blatantly Dinoking pretools), and they pretty much always appear as a big group, you can do a lot of copy-paste once you get team leader Goryu's section done, plugging another big hole that's been on the wiki for nearly two decades." So I dug up a subtitled run of Victory and...
It's incredibly, suffocatingly dry.
It's in this kind of awful middle ground where it's too simple and repetitive to be GOOD, but that lack of ambition means it never dips into the depths of ludicrously ridiculous/poor/careless writing that would make it BAD. It's just... there. A workmanlike product, inoffensive but also largely uninteresting.
The first six episodes are all basically the same story: Decepticons (mostly Dinoforce) attack a place, extended carnage and a few scenes of Kakuryu bungling, oh no some humans are in danger, Autobots show up, extruded fight sequences which typically lead up to a combiner sequence, Star Saber shows up to basically no-sell and win the day by just being super-powerful. It's only come episode seven that the formula changes. The stories don't necessarily get more complex, but they are at least different.
The Autobots are incredibly rigid and formal and it's hard to tell what most of them have got for personalities. It's not helping that, not being familiar with Japanese accents, they all sound incredibly similar and characters' faceplates don't move when they talk, meaning sometimes I literally can't tell who's talking. The Decepticons fare slightly better, thanks mainly to Leozack and Hellbat being super-duplicitous assholes and Goryu being a big proud lug, but the rest of Dinoforce are mostly childish idiots and the rest of Breastforce (yes, yes) are as flat as any Autobot, only evil.
Things do start changing up and getting slightly more character-driven after a while but really, it's all so rote. Also, six of the thirty-eight episodes are clip shows with no framing device whatsoever. The NINTH episode is a clip show, followed by another at episode 13. Yikes.
And stock footage. So, so, so much stock footage.
Supposedly, after the weirdness that was the Masterforce anime, Takara wanted to get "back to the roots" of Transformers, which had taken Japan by storm when it first released there in 1985. But by all accounts, a hefty part of what made TF so appealing o'er there to the point where re-releases of toys that had been on the market two years prior (in Diaclone and Microchange) suddenly sold like deep-fried crack was how it was so different from other "mecha" shows. It had a real goody-dumb to downright chaotic charm a lot of the time. But Victory is incredibly straight-laced, even to the point where the comedy relief bits are super predictable.
I was talking about it with @therobotmonster and he looked up what else was on "kids" TV in Japan (1989), and... whoof. Dragon Ball Z was ramping up to the first big fight with Vegeta. SD Gundam. Ranma 1/2 was hitting its stride. Never mind what was going on in the realm of Super Sentai and Masked Rider style action shows. And apparently, while Victory toys sold well, the show basically bombed.
Can't say that's surprising.
It's just kind of impressive the dull thud it's landing with, given I very distinctly remember the early days of online TF fandom in the 90s, when people swore up and down how amazing the anime were, especially Victory. Of course, by and large, nobody saying that actually understood Japanese and subtitles were out of the question, plus simply seeing the show was an endeavor all its own. You got a 9th-generation VHS copy from someone you didn't know on super-long-running speed (aka "worst fidelity") and just guessed at what was being said.
Ah well, I'm'a keep with it. I can't say I'm having fun with it, but well, it IS the wiki's purpose to catalog all this stuff, and Victory, dry as the cartoon is, DOES have nostalgia behind it and IS pretty much "The" Japanese Transformers Show.
And really, there are so many pieces of TF media that are so underwhelming compared to the toys they exist to advertise, and honestly, most of those are harder to watch than even the worst of Victory (looking at you, Prime Wars/War For Cybertron trilogies).
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OK I’m gonna talk for a long time about a character almost nobody but me is interested in, but I love her so please put up with me for a minute here lol
alright, here we go:
I feel like Road Rage is absolutely among the least-utilised G1 characters ever, which sucks because I love her so much!!!
Here’s a summary of her bio from TF Wiki:
Road Rage is the bodyguard/advisor of Ambassador Crosscut.
She is well-versed in alien cultures and generally cheerful, making her a very good diplomat.
However, a chronic short-out in her vehicle mode causes her to live up to her name; in car mode, she is a snarling, swerving speed machine with little regard—if not utter contempt—for anyone else on the road with her.
Which reminds me a lot of how they handled Grimlock as he’s depicted in Cyberverse, where he’s very polite and highly intelligent in root mode, but in alt-mode he’s out there fucking shit up, lmao.
And of course, she’s visually interesting because out of all the G1 femme bots, Road Rage is a big departure from the “typical” femme bot frame type, with a far more heavy-duty feel to her compared to Chromia, Moonracer, Arcee, etc. -- Her original G1 toy was just a re-deco of Tracks.
I can’t help but wonder how much her aesthetics played a role in her never really getting that much traction in Western/English language media... Sigh.
Although Road Rage does make an appearance in IDW 2!
And she does also appear in TFA as well:
However, in both IDW 2 and TFA, her frame type/model seems to have been adjusted quite a bit, and okay fine, but I feel like the heavy weight and serious look of the original G1 design gets a little lost in the redesigns and she ends up losing a lot of personality as a result, visually speaking.
Don’t get me wrong, I totally get that adjustments for art style / modernisation to match other character models etc. is a thing that needs to happen as part of natural art evolution and so on!
No problem with that; There’s a lot of consideration that goes into any character design process, and of course, it’s Transformers so toy models need to be taken into consideration as well, lol.
But I look at the original G1 Tracks re-deco design of Road Rage, and I think that IDK, making her less brick-like doesn’t really feel quite right to me, personally. (Of course, that’s just my opinion, and the redesigns aren’t inherently bad at all!)
In TFA they also made her a bounty hunter for-justice type character, but personally, I love her original bio. Kick ass diplomatic advisor. That’s so fucking strong!!!!
It just feels so much more unique and interesting to me, although I get that with TFA they were already working with a fairly large cast of characters with lots going on etc. and you gotta do what you gotta do to make things work for the story that you are trying to tell (or the story you are already in the middle of telling, which is often the case, lmao).
I just really like the idea of this very cordial diplomat’s advisor being a fucking HUGE MASSIVE POWERHOUSE LADY and looking threatening as shit, but actually she’s very chill and is there to help!
(Until she almost runs you off the road later but hey that’s not 100% her fault, she feels bad about it, she’ll help you get to the hotel so you can get ready for the speaker’s hall event later. No worries. lmao)
But still, IDK, it would be nice to see some more non-”typical” femme bots on a more regular basis.
I love the hell out of Termagax in IDW 2, Clobber in Cyberverse, etc. and tbh please give me more femme bots who are wide as hell.
Just, give me some absolutely huge femme bots.
(If we ever see Termagax animated in anything, I will lose my shit entirely, please give us more Termagax, I love her.)
I mean, come on, the G1 Road Rage design has that prominent hood torso/chest design that evokes TFA Ratchet’s “beer belly”-- It’s right there!!! Visually, it’s doable!!!
I feel like TFA Road Rage could have still had a fair enough redesign to match the style of the series but retained a larger / heavier set frame???
(Of course, this may not have been done for whatever reasons, but we have so few fat or even just generally big lady bots, and I feel like the G1 design for Road Rage could absolutely be interpreted in subsequent art styles / toy designs as being a wider / heavier frame type???)
We don’t see a lot of huge, heavy femme bots. The ones we do see are typically neutrals or Decepticons. We could use a few more fat lady Autobots, I’m just saying! But also just more large, strong, boxy, fat, etc. femme bots in general.
Again, not dunking on the IDW 2 / TFA designs, both art styles generally kick ass, but I love the G1 design for her so much.
Look at her. She’s so fucking powerful. I feel like the subsequent redesigns don’t really capture that sense of “absolute fucking rectangle of a femme bot”, but of course they also adjusted her character bio a bit for the redesigns too, so IDK.
In TFA, we already have some big bots like Bulkhead and of course, Ratchet’s got a pretty prominent robo-gut. We know it can be done!!
And in IDW 2, we do have a bit more frame type diversity, which is always welcome. <3
It just would have been interesting to see TFA Road Rage’s original hood torso/chest worked into a similar design to Ratchet’s, with a wider set frame, broader limbs, and thicker/bigger door wings to match-- Since her G1 model could already be interpreted as being pretty big, and it might have been a fun little throwback design / nod to the original for those who were already familiar with this character.
I mean, her original frame type was based on Tracks, and look at how they redesigned Tracks for TFA. Not a super big guy or anything lol, but it’s clear they played around with this frame type redesign concept in at least a couple ways.
So IDK!!!! I just love the original G1 Road Rage, and while I’m not dunking on the later redesigns of the character, I feel like it would be really cool to see a big lady bot in an interesting role like diplomatic advisor.
TL;DR: PLEASE GIVE ME THE FAT GOD TIER DIPLOMATIC ADVISOR VERSION OF ROAD RAGE, SHE IS LARGE AND SMART AND I LOVE HER.
#tf road rage#tfa#idw 2#transformers#long post#maccadam#maccadams#transformers animated#g1#transformers g1#tf g1#idw transformers
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Transformers
War For Cybertron
Kingdom
Leader Class
Ultra Magnus
by Hasbro (2021)
Happy New Year everyone!
Well it might 2023 but here on this blog we are still firmly planted in 2021, working off that backlog!
So let’s continue on!
I got lucky, and managed to pick up Kingdom Rhinox and Kingdom Ultra Magnus on June, 16th, 2021
This is my third Ultra Magnus of this War For Cybertron toyline.
Collector’s Card:
It’s another Dinobot. pealing the sticker back you see him in an action pose looking somewhat like his old Beast Wars toy design. Would have been nice to have a collector’s card of Ultra Magnus, but, you know...
Vehicle Mode:
Vehicle mode is Magnus in Earth mode as a car carrier, though I’m pretty sure he could only carry cars on the top, and not in the interior like the G1 toy to the 2001 RID version.
Still, it looks okay. The flat nosed cab is good retool, though the arms are still visible like the Siege version.
My biggest issue with the vehicle mode is that there’s no trailer hitch so this truck can only make SUPER wide turns.
I so see that as a flaw on Hasbro’s part considering he was about $50.
Comparing Magnus’ earth mode to his Cybertron mode you see that his earth mode is a tad longer, and that’s because of the slight retooling of the trailer parts. I guess Hasbro was trying to create an more noticeable difference between the two toys, and not strictly a copy/paste situation...which for the most part still is,
Transformation:
Transforming Ultra Magnus is very similar to his Siege counterpart, however the gray tabs on the cab attach to the trailer slightly differently, and it’s a TIGHT fit. So tight that I’m worried that I might get too rough and eventually break.
These gray tabs are also the only connection to the trailer. At least the Siege version has four points of connection while the Kingdom version has only two.
Aside from this it’s not a difficult conversion process.
Root Mode:
-Magnus:
Magnus out of his armor is basically a while Optimus Prime who is slightly chubby.
I still love this head sculpt. Aside from the sculpting differences he’s not that much different from the Siege Naked Magnus.
-Ultra Magnus:
Ultra Magnus in robot mode is pretty good. You can definitely see the sculpting differences between the Siege and Kingdom (Earth mode)
I found this to be a fun touch, is that Ultra Magnus’ eyes are painted translucent plastic, but the rest of the head isn’t.
The Kingdom version has fewer greeblys than the Siege version which looks more visually busy.
The legs and forearms are the same as Siege, while the shoulder pillars, head & chest are new molds.
The big guy can pull off the one-foot pose. With the angled ankle I wasn’t sure if it was going to work or not.
Accessories:
Kingdom Ultra Magnus comes with three accessories; tow shoulder rockets and his blaster.
The Siege version came with these as well (though the shoulders rockets were a different mold) but also came with two black guns (which were also used for the Galaxy Prime toy).
So Kingdom Ultra Magnus comes with two less accessories than his predecessors and the store still charged the same price for him.
Final Thoughts:
Kingdom Ultra Magnus is a solid toy. It captures that G1 charm with modern day engineering, and considering I also have the Siege, and Netflix Spoiler version, Kingdom Magnus is my third figure...and quite frankly this might very well be the last Ultra Magnus I’ll ever buy...Who am I kidding, I’ll probably buy the next one too...
Though I dig the look of Kingdom Magnus I’m not too thrilled that his truck mode doesn’t have a swiveling hitch, and that he comes with fewer accessories than the previous Siege versions did.
I’m sure that he won’t be the last Ultra Magus figure ever to be made where else could this figure unless Hasbro makes a new TF Prime, or TF Animated version of him? (As of this post I already have the Shattered Glass version)
Anyway, this Ultra Magnus is a good figure, and makes a great addition to my collection. I find it pretty funny and odd how a massive chunk of the Kingdom toyline ended up being spill over from Earthrise. But whatcha gonna do? I guess Hasbro still had a larger library of G1 figures they wanted to do than they were interested in Beast Wars. Or, perhaps Hasbro was concerned that the world wasn’t ready for a Beast Wars revival.
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The way I'm utterly and completely fed up with every single member of my family - and many, many of the people around me - cannot possibly be overstated rn.
I've been avidly childfree for as long as I can remember. In my 30s, I'm 100% confident that's the right choice for me. No holds barred. My mother is pressuring me harder and she kicked it up into HIGH gear today.
"If you loved me as a mother, you would give me grandchildren."
"Daniel Radcliffe had a kid. HE loves his mother."
"I must have done something wrong as a mother to make all three of my children not want to have kids!" (Yeah, you bitched about how much you hated being a mother for my entire childhood. Whaddya expect?)
"Oh, I get it. You just don't have a backbone. Only the strongest survive childbirth like I did!"
(We won't go into the fact that she has always been vehemently against me expressing a single scrap of sexuality at any point, forbade me from going to prom because "BOYS", and has repeatedly been against the idea of me dating....yes, I'm aromantic and non-partnering, no she doesn't know that. She literally wants me to have a baby FOR HER, no son-in-law involved.)
She has reconnected with several girls I knew in high school who are all pregnant and/or have several kids by now. I don't have any connection with these girls now but SHE does. She's making baby clothes for them, sending stuff to their baby showers.
Every. single. one of these girls are too wildly emotionally immature to have children. They don't discipline their kids AT ALL. In any capacity. They randomly strip toys away from their kids just to make them scream and then they laugh in the kid's face while the kid cries.
It's fucking AWFUL.
One of my cousins is expecting her first baby and she literally wants to name her child after the tv show Vikings. Why on earth would you do that to your child???? She has no Norse roots. She's straight up American. And she's gonna name her kid Uthegaard (seriously a name she's considering).
Why TF are people like this allowed to procreate???? WHY?
My parents have been GROVELING at the feet of my brother and his girlfriend lately. He doesn't have a job btw. They are 10000% supporting him. He's in training to be a pilot simply for the money (his words). It was a one year program, and it has taken 5+ years. He's not done yet.
He refuses to get a job to support himself because he just...doesn't want to be bothered. So instead, he brags about getting black-out drunk, partying, and gaming for 16 hours, while my parents pet him and say, "We're taking you grocery shopping and you can get anything you want because we don't want you to worry about money!!!"
After they spend $200+ on groceries (where he demands specialty cheeses and cuts of salmon) he doesn't want to eat any of THAT food when he brings it home. He wants to go OUT. So they say yes!! Of course!! And he gets to pick the place!!! So he chooses the most expensive restaurant at $100 a plate.
I've literally never in my life been to a place that expensive. I would feel SO BAD about it.
He throws raging tantrums when we play games (and yes, he's coming over this weekend for my father's birthday so we can have "family time" and I'm holding out hope I might die in my sleep before then). He'll literally fling the cards on the table and yell, "This is fucking STUPID! I have THE WORST cards!! I can't possibly win with any of those cards!! I refuse to play until you start over and deal me another hand!"
And people DO. They LAUGH. They say, "Wow, you're a spoilsport...let's just do what he wants to make him happy!"
He's turning THIRTY YEARS OLD and he's behaving like this!!!!!
His girlfriend is like fingernails on a chalkboard levels of arrogant. She works at a water bottle factory. Two years ago, she was a temp who was called in to decorate the office now and then. She did NOT get that job and was instead moved to standing by a series of valves and reporting on a walkie-talkie whether the valve(s) are on or not.
Fast forward to present day and she's bragging about how "they won't fire me, I'm indispensable, they NEED me! I'm on the same level as the boss now! I'm going to tell THEM how it works around here now!"
Girl....what the actual fuck kind of mushrooms have you been eating to be THAT delusional???
My parents were SO enamored with her when she had her own art show....which was at a very tiny hole-in-the-wall place, with a plain table, a black cloth, and a handful of playing card sized paintings that all looked the same (some airy little clouds and sparkly stars).
I literally had my artwork displayed at the Yellowstone Art Museum and sold at their annual auction.
They did not give a flying fuck.
Is it any wonder I don't want a family of my own? Is it any wonder that I will ALWAYS prefer to be entirely alone rather than deal with other people and their fuckery????
I want peace and quiet. I want a cozy house with plants, books, and a herd of rescued cats.
I never, EVER want to follow in my parents' footsteps and surround myself with this bullshit for the sake of "Faaaammmmilllyyyyy."
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Here are some 💯 Facts about me (LONG & DETAILED, oh and I skipped some questions that I don't want to answer)
1. Five ways to win your Heart
• Transparency
• Ride or Die with me
• Be a little more gentle & compassionate (cuz am sensitive af)
• Quality Time (gifts of any forms and kinds)
• Be Stylish as possible ~ (Arts & Physical Aesthetics)
2. Something you feel strongly about
➡️ I've always had a kinship for Depth, things that are considered Taboo and unusual by the Society.
3. A book you love
➡️ Murder House by James Patterson
5. Things you want to say to an ex
➡️ "I can't think of anything to say . . Fvck it." (Charles Lee Ray, Seed of Chucky reference)
7. Five Pet Peeves
• I don't like my hair being touched and toyed with. (Unless I like you, then I'd let you.)
• Germs (I've genuinely acquired a freakin' phobia ever since the Pandemic, as a result I always bring sanitizers & alcohol with me and use it every single time I touch any objects. It even came to a point in which my hands were so dry and gets wounded. So ye, It is guaranteed an OCD now.)
• I am extremely indecisive and picky when it comes to my clothing, and it buys time y'know.. Sometimes this is the root cause of me and my mom's discourse.
• I don't like to walk around the house barefooted, I need to at least wear slippers/socks.
• Peeps who don't know personal space.
8. What you Ate today
➡️ Fried Fish (Bangus, Specifically. I am into Pescetarian diet)
10. Put your music player on shuffle and write the first ten songs that play
➡️ Stained Glass (Madison Beer)
➡️ Hey Kids (Molina)
➡️ Working b*tch (Ashnikko)
➡️ Wine red (Hush Sound)
➡️ Salvation Butterfly (01g. No Gosan)
➡️ Knives and Pens (Black Veil Brides)
➡️ Blood in the Water (Grandson)
➡️ Make you mine (Taniyama Kishou)
➡️ Lullaby (Polina Gagarina)
➡️ Afterlife (Avenged Sevenfold)
12. Five guys whom you find attractive
Celebrity or nah? (I'll go with celebs)
➡️ Ryan Gosling
➡️ Levi Miller
➡️ Nobuhiko Okamoto
➡️ Mamoru Miyano
➡️ Andrew Astor
13. Your opinion about your body and how comfortable you are with it
➡️ My confidence level varies, but I am genuinely in love with my body and skin. I'd say despite my eyebags, I believe that my eyes are the most attractive thing about me.
14. What you wore today
➡️ Striped-White and green t-shirt-like Hoodie and navy blue jean shorts.
15. Your Zodiac sign/Horoscope and if you think it fits your personality
➡️ I am a Proud Pisces sun and It does have a contribution to my super sensitive nature. Anyways, as much as I am a geek on Astrology, I don't want to associate the Characteristics of being a Piscean way too much into who I truly am as a person on a soul level, cuz some peeps be actin weird because of this. We need to have a reality check, and must not get too caught up on many contexts about Astrology since it is complex and the so-called characteristics of every Zodiac signs are interchangeable. Remember we are Humans not Cyborgs, Internet can be so overwhelming and is toxic, we have to replenish ourselves by leaving our house every once in a while.
16. Something you always think "What if..." About
➡️ What if I'm gone tomorrow, will i still retain some of my deep & dark suppressed memories when I was once still alive?.. Like, I don't want to carry those anymore in my next life.. I just want an Eternal peace.
17. Something that you're proud of
➡️ I'm proud of who I am as a person, mind, body and soul and I'll unapologetically keep my head and chin up high and set my priorities straight, full speed ahead and continue to exist, thrive and pave my way to success.
19. Five items you lust after
➡️ My own future House
➡️ My own future car
➡️ Money (who tf doesn't right?)
➡️ Extravagant Clothing + Cosmetics
➡️ Jewelries
20. Your fears
➡️ Being Forgotten, Acrophobia & germs
21. How you hope your future will be like
➡️ Abundance and prosperity in all areas of my life, peace & Serendipity.
22. Your Academics
I am Mediocre, if the questions about favorite subject, I love Philosophy.
23. Something that you miss
I miss my Dead dog, Toots 😭💖
25. Something you're currently worrying about
➡️ I overthink to death about everything and it keeps me up at night.
28: Somewhere you'd like to move to or visit
J A P A N, N O T H I N G E L S E
29: five weird things that you like
(Go back to my answer in #2)
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i was raised so weirdly w religion actually like my parents did want me to be raised catholic but we never went to church and while my mother was a regular ol’ cafeteria catholic, my father was way into a bunch of latinx superstitions and did “““witchcraft””” shit like crystal healing and tarot n i was absolutely raised not so much to believe in god but to believe almost like a christian animism n veneration of the dead????? like, jesus will forgive u no matter what but everything around u has a soul bc god gave all objects their own souls (not necessarily consciousness, just a soul), spirits walk among us, and u should pay respects to your dead ancestors on at least a weekly basis..... i wonder if that’s a latinx thing or specific to my chilean relatives alone
#i think its why i cant reconcile myself with atheism fully#like fuck catholicism and that but theres something to be said for the less typically catholic aspects of the religious upbringing i had#i think it fostered an appreciation for deeper meaning in life??#but also made me a hoarder as a kid bc i didnt want the souls in all my toys to think i didnt want them anymore by throwing them away#maybe its the mapuche roots in my family tho#who tf knows honestly
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disability in the Six Of Crows Duology; an analysis of Kaz Brekker, Wylan Van Eck, and the fandom’s treatment of them.
****Note: I originally wrote this for a tiktok series, which im still going to do, but i wanted to post here as well bc tumblr is major contributor to what im going to talk about
CW: ableism, filicide, abuse
In the Six of Crows duology, Leigh Bardugo delicately subverts and melds harmful disability tropes into her narrative, unpacking them in a way that I, as a disabled person, found immensely refreshing and…. just brilliant.
But what did you all do with that? Well, you fucked it up. Instead of critically looking at the characters, y’all just chose to be ableist.
For the next few videos paragraphs im going to unpack disability theory (largely the stuff surrounding media, for obvious reasons) and how it relates to Six Of Crows and the characterization of Kaz Brekker and Wylan Van Eck, then how, despite their brilliant writing, y’all completely overlooked the actual text and continuously revert them to ableist cariactures.
Disclaimer: 1. Shocker - i am disabled. I have also extensively researched disability theory and am very active in the disabled community. Basically, I know my shit. 2. im going to be mad in these videos this analysis. Because the way y’all have been acting has been going on for a long ass time and im fuckin sick of it. I don’t give a shit about non-disabled feelings, die mad
Firstly, I’m going to discuss Kaz, his play on the stereotypical “mean cripple” trope and how Bardugo subverts it, his cane, and disabled rage. Then, I am going to discuss Wylan, the “inspiration porn” stereotype, caregivers / parents, and the social model of disability. Finally, I will then explain the problems in the fandom from my perspective as a disabled person, largely when it comes to wylan, bc yall cant leave that boy tf alone.
Kaz Brekker
Think of a character who uses a cane (obviously not Kaz). Now, are they evil, dubiously moral, or just an asshole in general? Because nearly example I can think of is: whether it be Lots’O from Toy Story, Lucius Malfoy, or even Scrooge and Mr.Gold from Once Upon A Time all have canes (the last two even having their canes appear less and less as they become better people)
The mean/evil cripple trope is far more common than you would think. Villains with different bodies are confined to the role of “evil”. To quote TV Tropes, who I think did a brilliant job on explaining it “The first is rooted in eugenics-based ideas linking disability or other physical deformities with a "natural" predisposition towards madness, criminality, vice, etc. The Rule of Symbolism is often at work here, since a "crippled" body can be used to represent a "crippled" soul — and indeed, a disabled villain is usually put in contrast to a morally upright and physically "perfect" hero. Whether consciously on the part of the writer or not, this can reinforce cultural ideas of disability making a person inherently inferior or negative, much in the same way the Sissy Villain or Depraved Homosexual trope associate sexual and gender nonconformity with evil. ”
Our introduction to Kaz affirms this notion of him being bad or morally bankrupt, with “Kaz Brekker didn’t need a reason”, etc. This mythologized version of himself, the “bastard of the barrel” actively fed into this misconception. But, as we the audience are privy to his inner thoughts, know that he is just a teenager like every other Crow. He is complex, his disability isn’t this tragic backstory, he just fell off a roof. It’s not his main motivation, nor does he curse revenge for making him a cripple - it is just another part of who he is.
His cane (though the shows version fills me with rage but-) is an extension of Kaz - he fights with it, but it has a purpose. Another common thing in media is for canes to be simply accessories, but while Kaz’ cane is fashionable, it has purpose.
The quote “There was no part of him that was not broken, that had not healed wrong and there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken.” is so fucking powerful. Kaz does not want nor need a cure - its said in Crooked Kingdom that his leg could most likely be healed, but he chooses not to. Abled-bodied people tend to dismiss this thought as Kaz being stubborn but it shows a reality of acceptance of his disability that is just, so refreshing.
In chapter 22 of SOC, we see disabled rage done right - when he is called a cripple by the Fjerdan inmate, Kaz is pissed - the important detail being that he is pissed at the Fjerdan, at society for ableism, not blaming it on being disabled or wishing he could be normal. He takes action, dislocating the asshole’s shoulder and proving to him, and to a lesser extent, himself, that he is just as capable as anyone else, not in spite of, but because he is disabled. And that is the point of Kaz, harking back to the line that “there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken”.
I cried on numerous occasions while reading the SOC duology, but the parts I highlighted in this section especially so. I, as many other disabled people do, have had a long and tumultuous relationship with our disability/es, and for many still struggle. But Kaz Brekker gave me an empowered disabled character who accepts themselves, and that means the world to me.
Keeping that in mind, I hope you can understand why it hurts so much to disabled people when you either erase Kaz’s disability (whether through cosplay or fanfiction), or portray him as a “broken boy uwu”, especially implying that he would want a cure. That flies in the face of canon and is inherently fucking ableist. (if u think im mad wait until the next section)
Next, we have Wylan.
Oh fucking boy.
I love Wylan so fucking much, and y’all just do not seem to understand his character? Like at all? Since this is disability-centric, I’m not going to discuss how the intersection of his queerness also contributes to these issues, but trust me when I say it’s a contributing factor to what i'm going to say.
Wylan, motherfucking Van Eck. If you ableist pricks don’t take ur fucking hands off him right now im going to fight you. I see Wylan as a subversion another, and in my opinion more insidious stereotype pf disabled people - inspiration porn.
Cara Liebowitz in a 2015 article on the blog The Body Is Not An Apology explains in greater detail how inspiration porn is impactful in real life, but media is a major contributing factor to this reality. The technical definition is “the portrayal of people with disabilities as inspirational solely or in part on the basis of their disability” - but that does not cover it fully.
Inspiration porn does lasting damage on the disabled community as it implies that disability is a negative that you need to “overcome” or “triumph” instead of something one can feel proud of. It exploits disabled people for the development of non-disabled people, and in media often the white male protagonist. Framing disability as inherently negative perpetuates ideals of eugenics and cures - see Autism $peaks’ “I Am Autism” ad. Inspiration porn is also incredibly patronizing as it implies that we cannot take care of ourselves, or do things like non-disabled people do. Because i stg some of you tend to think that we just sit around all day wishing we weren’t disabled.
Another important theory ideal that is necessary when thinking about Wylan is the experience of feeling like a burden simply for needing help or accommodations. This is especially true when it comes to familial relationships, and internalized ableism.
The rhetoric that Wylan’s father drilled into his head, that he is “defective”, “a mistake”, and “needs to be corrected”, that he (Jan) was “cursed with a moron for a child” is a long held belief that disabled people hear relentlessly. And while many see Van Eck’s attempted murder of Wylan as “preposturous” and overall something that you would never think happens today - filicide (a parent murdering their child) is more common than you would like to believe. Without even mentioning the countless and often unreported deaths of disabled people due to lack of / insufficient / neglectful medical care, in a study on children who died from the result of household abuse, 40 of 42 of them (95%) were diagnosed with disabilities. Van Eck is not some caricature of ableist ideals - he is a real reflection on how many people and family members view disability.
Circling back to how Wylan unpacks the inspiration porn trope - he is 3 dimensional, he is not only used to develop the other characters, he is just *chefs kiss* Leigh, imo, put so much love and care into the creation of Wylan and his story and character growth that is representative of a larger feeling in the disabled community.
That being said, what you non-disabled motherfuckers have done to him.
The “haha Wylan can’t read” jokes aren’t and were not funny. Y’all literally boiled down everything Wylan is to him being dyslexic. And it’s like,,,, the only thing you can say about him. You ignore every other part of him other than his disability, and then mock him for it. There’s so much you can say about Wylan - simping for Jesper, being band kid and playing the fuckin flute, literally anything else. But no, you just chose to mock his disability, excellent fucking job!
Next up on “ableds stfu” - infantilization! y’all are so fucking condescending to Wylan, and treat him like a fucking toddler. And while partly it is due to his sexuality i think a larger portion is him being disabled. Its in the same vein of people who think that Wylan and Jesper are romantically one sided, and that Jesper only kind of liked Wylan, despite the canon evidence of him loving Wylan just as much. You all view him as a “smol bean”, who needs protecting, and care, when Wylan is the opposite of that. He is a fucking demolitions expert who suggested waking up sleeping men to kill them - what about that says “uwu”. You are treating Wylan as a burden to Jesper and the other Crows when he is an immensely valuable, fully autonomous disabled person - you all just view him as damaged.
And before I get a comment saying that “uhhh Wylan isn’t real why do you care” while Wylan may not be real, how you all view him and treat him has real fucking impacts and informs how you treat people like me. If someone called me an “uwu baby boy” they’d get a fist square in the fucking jaw. Fiction informs how we perceive the world and y’all are making it super fucking clear how you see disabled people.
Finally, I wanted to talk about how the social model of disability is portrayed through Wylan. For those who are unaware, the social model of disability contrasts the medical model, that views the disability itself as the problem, that needs to be cured, whereas the social model essentially boils down to creating an accommodating society, where disability acceptance and pride is the goal. And we see this with Wylan - he is able to manage his father’s estate, with Jesper’s assistance to help him read documents. And this is not out of pity or charity, but an act of love. It is not portrayed as this almighty act for Jesper to play saviour, just a given, which is incredibly important to show, especially for someone who has been abused by family for his disability like Wylan, that he is accepted.
Yet, I still see people hold up Jesper on a pedestal for “putting up with” Wylan, as if loving a disabled person deserves a fucking pat on the back. It’s genuinely exhausting trying to engage with a work I love so much with a fandom that thinks so little of me and my community. It fucking shows.
Overall, Leigh Bardugo as a disabled person wrote two incredibly meticulous and empowered disabled characters, and due to either lack of reading comprehension, ableism, or a quirky mix of both, the fandom has ignored canon and the experiences of disabled people for…. shits and giggles i guess. And yes, there are issues with the Grishaverse and disability representation - while I haven’t finished them yet so I do not have an opinion on it, people have been discussing issues in the KOS duology with ableist ideals. This mini series was no way indicative of the entire disabled experience, nor does it represent my entire view on the representation as a whole. These things need to be met critically in our community, and talked about with disabled voices at the forefront. For example, the limited perspective we get of Wylan and Kaz being both white men, does not account for a large portion of the disabled community and the intersection of multiple identities.
All-in-all, Critique media, but do not forget to also critique fandom spaces. Alternatively, just shut the fuck up :)
happy fucking disability pride month, ig
#soc#six of crows#kaz brekker#soc kaz#kaz talk tag#kanej#grisha#grishaverse#ketterdam#leigh bardugo#bardugo#crooked kingdom#ck#wylan#wylan van sunshine#wylan supremacy#jesper x wylan#wesper#jesper fahey#shadow and bone#wylan van eck#jan van eck#ableism#ableist bullshit#ableist slurs#disability#disability pride month#i will punch you in the face#el oh el#laugh out loud
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So instead of BotBots, today we’ll discuss EarthSpark for a moment. Some new info cropped up about its upcoming toy line, which hey look at that, is still for KIDS.
Now that we got that band-aid ripped off, here’s some copy pasta:
““Transformers: Earthspark presents many firsts for Transformers that we’re bringing to life for kids. Leaning into insights, we’ve identified core pillars of play that allow us to take conversion to another level and connect with kids to deliver on the magic they want [to be] brought to life in toys. Surprise Conversion, Classic Conversion, and Magic Conversion will create a true show-to-shelf moment for the line and an innovative new way to convert Earthspark’s greatest heroes.””
I’m no expert on toys, as much as I advocate for Transformers to lean more into its toyetic roots (looking at you Prime, RiD15, WFC and Cyberverse), I’m not suuuper sure what Surprise and Magic would refer to. I’m guessing both could be a return to older semi-automatic Transformation gimmicks like Automorph? Are these gimmicks something the EarthSpark Transformers can do that … uh CybertronSpark(?) TFs can’t? (That would be neat if so.)
Are these just new names for things like One Step Changers so as to not piss off everyone and their Great Aunt Arcee who hates this gimmick (I don’t dislike it personally, but I have seen SO MUCH HATRED for a small cog in the scheme of things….).
I mean Magic Conversion mostly makes me think of the red drone guy in a top hat waving a wand around, probably having talked Bee into being part of the bit. “With a flick of my wand, you are now a Volkswagen! A Jeep! A Camero! A Dinosaur! A steam engine!“ Bee: Slow down! Phew! I need to do some Transform Ups again…!
Still hopefully the upcoming toys look cool. I liked the Action Attack gimmick in Cyberverse, the other stuff not so much… (Why do you include Volcanicus and have a return to Crash Combiners, but not actually have a set of Dinobots that can combine into him…? Oh well maybe that was for the best considering Ultra Bee and Menasor not looking … quite up to snuff anyway.)
The only thing I really ask for at this point, and RiD15, the Movie toys and Cyberverse were REALLY bad with this: have some Decepticon variety. The lines have skewed near exclusively to being almost all Autobots, with practically the only Decepticons being Megatron, Starscream and the Waves in some capacity or another. I really want to see Insecticons and as many new EarthSpark Decepticons as possible. Not Megatron and a bajillion Bumblebees, Sideswipes, and Windblades. I don’t want to miss out on possible toys like RiD15 Chop Shop (why wasn’t he a toy? he could’ve been in Combiner Force! It was RIGHT there. Yes I’m still bitter because he was my favorite guy in the show besides Bisk and Clampdown).
I hope we start seeing more toys and character roll calls for EarthSpark soon though. Now that BotBots has settled for now, let’s get some deets on the new bigger Transformers!
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Could you give any HCs about Intrulogical with Alpha!Logan and Omega!Remus? If not it's totally fine, ik that isn't the main Intrulogical dynamic you have going on, I just like the concept but I've never come across any works with it
Ye!!
HCs
Omega Remus is a bastard. I mean, he's a bastard regardless. But even more so as an omega. Like that "I'm just a lil guy, and it's my birthday! You wouldn't hurt the lil birthday boy on his birthday-" meme. That kinda bastard. Likes to make ppl think he's a weak thing but he'll stab a bish
Very allergic to soap and he kept stealing Logan's clothes for his nest, but the detergent Logan used to use really set off his allergies and Logan would always know. He changed his detergent for him
Remus was notorious for sleeping around, but he always holed himself up during heats. Always. He had his sights set on Logan-mostly because he saw him as an uptight prude and he loves toying with those. He actually planned on ghosting him after the deed. But he caught feelings whoops
Alpha Logan comes from a v prominent family and he's always wary of unclaimed omegas only looking for a rich mate. His parents tried arranging several dates for him and he always turned them down. He was relieved when Remus' presence alone nearly cut the amount of these unwanted suitors in half. He thought it was because they saw Remus as a threat because he obviously has some screws loose. The real reason is that everyone assumed they were dating, because Remus kept stealing his clothes. And so he smelled like him.
Logan used cologne to cover his pheromones because he never liked how much of an effect his had on people-especially omegas. He's got a v strong presence. V commanding. He doesn't like it. He wants people to listen to Him, not his pheromones.
If Remus felt like he was in his brother's shadow before? Bruh, it's even worse now. Only because their parents are very traditional. They're not very supportive. And ye they've both gone no contact with them. For many reasons, but the main being their horrible reaction to something incredibly traumatic that happened to Remus. I'm just going to say Roman went to jail for nearly killing another alpha and let y'all connect the dots. No one touches his baby brother, even if they are only a few minutes apart.
Lewd below the cut
Remus wouldn't spend heats with Logan for a long time after they started dating-he just didn't like being that vulnerable around someone.
Remus was Logan's first everything and that just lit him tf u p. Logan was super embarrassed when they first knotted, he was so concerned. "Are you sure this isn't painful for you?" "Only if you jerk me around, specks." Just teasing him. But bruh, as soon as Logan got comfortable in the bedroom Remus was done for.
Remus is a freak and just-I'm sorry but he loves rooting through Logan's dirty laundry. Not even for stuff to add to his nest, he just-he nasty. He also just, loves to smell Logan after he's finished working out.
Logan often works from home and when you have a mate who's default state is "super horny all the time" you have to come up with creative solutions. His favorite is just, having Remus literally sit on his dick while he works. No moving allowed. Remus just has to sit there and whine about it. It's called cock warming and it's 👌👌👌
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wiggly for the character thing >:)
Why I like them: he’s friend shaped. Well not only that cause I like his voice too and just the concept is like really cool?? A cute plushie eldritch horror fluff? Yes, please! And I like how he’s something beyond just a grotesque concept of a violent entity in a body of a toy, he has his characters, he seems very,, human at times, don't you think?
Why I don't like them: well I’m kind of rooting for Hannah so,, you know
Favourite scene: made in America is technically about him so?? I just really like that part so ill put it here anyways
Favourite season/movie: Black Friday. I generally liked NT better but if we’re talking about wiggly content BF wins obviously
Favourite line: “Well, Webby is a. Stupid. Bitch.”
Favourite outfit: plush form?
OTP: none, all beings are related to him and I don't see him with a human
Brotp: Wilbur and Wiggly but it's actually Wilbur being the (a bit more) sane/normal one or alternatively just bitching to him about stuff while Wiggly is very done with all the human bullshit why can't human people kill each other to resolve all the problems - who tf cares there are so many timelines anyway
Headcanon: Wiggly uses he/him but does use they/them too fight me on that-
Unpopular opinion: I love him but he definitely isn't the best nor the most interesting lord he just got more attention so far. It pains me to admit it because I love my green child but it's true
A wish: to have him interact with his brothers in the next season
Please-don’t-ever-happen: someone told me that people shipped Wiggly and Blinky and while I know it’s extremely unlikely to happen I still feel absolute dread thinking about this concept
In 5 words:
Fluffy
Angry
Violent
Glowing
Giant
Nickname: I never gave him a proper one but I always call him my son/my beautiful green son to the point where I rarely use his name so that counts I think
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Hey!
I love Penelope Douglas for sure check her out! She writes some of the best smut tbh. I’m working my way through her devils night series right now-I’m on book 2. It’s good so far, definitely dark though. I’m interested to see how she goes about a redemption arc for the character Damon right now I don’t think he deserves one but I hear such good things about his book, Killswitch, but that’s book 3 so I will see how it goes. I definitely recommend Birthday Girl from her though I loved it and the couple from it are my favorite age gap could I’ve ever read. I find myself still re reading some of their best moments.
I am slightly embarrassed by Credence though so I hope it doesn’t bother you too much if you read it. Just so you know before going into it, it is about her and her step uncle/cousins. To be fair they are not blood related and very distance to the point she didn’t even know about them. But she does call him Uncle Jake during a sex scene, and the two others call her cousin during one too. There’s also a MMF scene with her two cousins. But on top of that there is a sexual assault scene (it does get stopped but the intent is there)-personally I wasn’t a fan of how she inwardly dealt with that scenario it felt like she was blaming herself for it instead of holding the other character accountable. Uncle Jake also does kiss her when she is still 17. So if any of that makes you uncomfortable don’t read it.
I’m so happy you liked the atlas six as much as I did. I can’t believe we have to wait until next year for the sequel to see what happens. It’s too long!! I also liked Callum the least, I still appreciated his character though and what he brings to the story I just wasn’t a fan of his, probably because of his problems with Libby/Parisa. Plus his powers terrify me-as someone who likes to have full control of my emotions the fact that someone could just change everything scares me. I also loved Nico he is my typical character that I love the whole I’m an asshole but soft and caring for the people I love gets me every time. Parisa is my queen though I’m obsessed with her. Like I’m literally in love with her, I wish she was real so she could be with me instead. Not that she would because I’m broke have 0 magic or power to give to her, but still. But I have a thing for power hungry women so I was gone the second I met her. But anyway if she was real she could destroy me or do anything she wanted to me and I would say thank you. Reina I also love and agree she could destroy the whole planet and one day probably will. I just love how she is there and wants all that knowledge but also doesn’t give a fuck about anyone else. Tristan also grew on me I’m still not completely sure how much I like or don’t like him yet he gets annoying sometimes because he is constantly in his mind about his alliances but I also love how loyal and caring he is. Libby is my girl!! I also relate to her as well since I was an outcast and battled inadequacy and all that (you and I must have some stuff in common!) Out of all the characters I relate to her the most and am rooting for her so hard-also because the author made her from Pittsburgh and I’m also from the area so I felt personally attached. But Olivie just did an interview and said Libby is getting a corruption arc and I am so excited about it!!
Okay ships- so I will be honest and I think it’s an unpopular opinion but oh well-I am a nicolibby stan. They have every single dynamic that I love in a ship and they could potentially be my favorite book couple of all time if that is the road they are being taken. Honestly I was obsessed with them from their first interaction so i have it bad for them. Obviously I know they were not romantic in this book but the potential (at least for me) was there especially in some of their quotes in the end. I fully believe they are soulmates though-even the author said they were born on the same day and feel like their other half is missing in an interview once-whether that will be platonic soulmates or romantic soulmates I have no idea and I could see either happening. My heart will break if it is platonic but it’s okay I can just live in my own little head about their potential.
But I get the idea and also like both libbytristan and NicoGideon and could see those happening instead of nicolibby too. I wouldn’t say I would be mad about it either-I do like both just to me the potential of nicolibby works more for me! My only thing about libbytristan though is I’m not sure how much of their tension/feelings are real (like did any of it exist before Parisa put the idea of the other person in their thoughts to lead to all the feelings.)
Weirdly enough since they probably my least favorite characters I also adore Tristan and Callum together. Their dynamic just works for me.
And I love Parisa and Dalton too and I’m so interested in how that relationship pans out because they have some stuff to figure out. But they work well together and honestly they are just so sexy together so I’m down for it. Although I do ship myself with Parisa more than her and Dalton but I’m biased.
Honestly though all the ships are wide open though so I’m curious to see what ends up being endgame. But omg yes the twist I was not expecting it-I’m so excited for the rest of this trilogy!!!
In other news though I finished up the ravenhood series. I know you said you either read it or it was on your tbr. But god I loved it. That series broke me and then put back all the pieces. If you haven’t read it and want to feel both heartbreak and happiness I highly recommend it!
Oh and don’t apologize for babbling as you can tell I also babble!!
-ACOTAR anon
Hiiiii sweets!
I've been sifting through a bunch of summaries of Penelope Doulgas' work on Goodreads and there's a bunch of stuff there I think I'd enjoy. I'm all about good smut. I didn't realize she had that many books. I'm excited! Thanks so much for the rec! I love dark romances/erotica every now and again so I'm also going to have to dive into the Devil's Night series at some point.
Oh, and idk if you know about it/read it but a couple of my friends told me about the Crossfire series by Sylvia Day a while back. It's BDSM, like Fifty Shades, but supposedly loads better. I don't know if you're into that but I figured I'd just throw it out there anyway. The smut is supposed to be steamy. I haven't read it yet but I do have the first four novels on my Kindle (where they've been sitting, unread, for about 2 years now)...so that's something haha.
And please don't be embarrassed about Credence. Seriously, the most wonderful thing about reading is you can go wherever tf you want in your imagination. No one can stop you. There are no rules. No restrictions. You can be whomever or whatever you want to be for a while, morality notwithstanding. One of my favorite things about books is that I can experience the most bonkers, outlandish out-of-this-world stuff that I'd never dream of wanting/liking in real life. It's liberating!
Thank you for the trigger warnings, though. I appreciate that. None of them sound off-putting enough to keep me from reading it. (Tbh, I want to read it more now.) I've read loads of books where characters marry or have sex with their cousins or siblings *waves at ASOIAF, the Secret History* so it doesn't bother me. I've also read most of Lolita and all of My Dark Vanessa by Kate Russell, which both romanticize pedophilia in disturbing degrees, so it takes a lot to put me off. If curiosity could kill then I'd be long dead by now. Hell, sometimes I will purposely read things I know will upset me to my core. What can I say? I'm a weirdo. 🙃
I DON'T WANT TO WAIT A YEAR FOR BOOK 2 OF THE ATLAS SERIES, EITHER. AHHHHH. How am I going to make it that long? It seems so far away!
Callum is the most terrifying of them all right now, imo. I think that's why I disliked him the most. Like you, it shook me to my core to imagine someone like him being able to toy with my emotions. I have a tendency to detach, to keep my emotions pressed close to my chest so that I can't be manipulated or hurt, and the idea that someone could have power over them, over me in that way is...no freaking thank you! I would put as much space between him and me as possible. Most of the Atlas crew had the right idea there. He does bring a lot to the story, though, like you said. I have a feeling he's going to be one of those characters I "love to hate" as the series progress. I might even grow to "hate to love" him, idk. He's just such a shady bastard! And so judgmental/mean to the girls.
I'm with you on Parisa, by the way. She's the kind of conniving, ambitious siren of a woman I can get behind. She has a similar vibe as Katherine Pierce on TVD. I mean, there's nothing in her arsenal she won't use and I love how she weaponizes her beauty. It's delicius. She's unpredictable. Definitely the type of character who inspires "scared and aroused" energy any time she walks into a room. Like, she could choke you and instead of crying you'd just ask her to do it again...harder lol.
Reina has the same kind of "no fucks given" attitude I have because I genuinely don't care what people think of me, either. I'm just here to do my thing. Be nerdy. Learn. Whatever. And Nico is my fave for the same reason as you--the asshole who only has soft edges for those who matter to him. *heart eyes*
Omg, Libby is going to have a corrupted arc? AHHHHH. That's going to be amazing, I cannot stinking wait! I was sort of hoping she'd go dark so now that it's confirmed I'm even more pumped. Also, I think you and I have more in common than either of us realized. I'm from the Pittsburgh area, too! How wild is that? Maybe there's something in the water here and that's why, like Libby, we've both felt inadequate and like outcasts at different points in our lives? Olivie might be onto something here...🤔
The thing that's been so cool for me about this series so far is that there are a bunch of potential pairings I could get behind. And I kind of like that it's not clear cut right now. Most series I know who I want together or who will be together like halfway through book 1. I like that I don't know have firm preferences and am still open. That's novel. Not to mention fun!
I don't blame you for shipping Nicolibby so hard, though. They're definitely one of my top contenders for a romantic pairing. They have that enemies-to-lovers element with witty banter that I always gravitate toward. And you're right about Libby/Tristan. I don't know how much of their connection was manufactured because Parisa intervened, either. That'll be fun to puzzle out moving forward. And Callum/Tristan should NOT be a ship I like but they have a palpable something that I can't put my finger on. I've got my eye on them, for sure.
The Ravenhood series is still on my tbr. I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed it so much, though! It's rare to read something that just ticks all your boxes. The next time I'm the mood to binge a series I'm gonna have to pick that one up. :-D
I've been trying to clear out my backlog of ARCs lately. (Not possible because I'm getting more on the regular - as in constantly haha - but I'm trying.) I just finished Wish You Were Here by Jodi Picoult, which has a Sliding Doors premise that is set during the pandemic where the main character has a parallel life experience (one, where she's in the Galapagos Islands on vacation when the shutdown hits so she's stuck there with strangers, alone, not speaking the language; the other, where she's in Manhattan with her surgeon boyfriend and recovering from COVID). It's intense but so, SO good! Picoult is such a good writer. Anything I've read by her has been moving, with rounded and real characters. I haven't been disappointed yet. I so recommend her.
Oh, and if you're into nonfiction/biographies at all I finished The Splendid and the Vile by Erik Larson not long ago, which is about Winston Churchill as well as those around him, and it was fantastic! Read more like fiction. I loved it. I am no longer surprised it was on all the BEST lists for 2020.
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Btw if anyone is like me and likes using toys as drawing refs and wants good tf drawing refs and cant afford to buy a toy every single time you want to draw someone I recommend seibertron.com. they have a whole bunch of galleries for different characters. Pictures taken from many different angles in alt mode and in root mode.
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Transformers Henkei! Henkei! Alert (2009)
This one has been a long time coming. One of my seemingly ceaseless side quests as far as TF collecting goes has been attempting to round up modern versions of all the figures I owned as a kid. But the current Siege Red just doesn't do it for me, mostly because of the alt mode.
Red Alert has special personal significance as his original toy was the first of the larger boxed Autobot cars I ever owned - one of those magical vehicles with roots in Diaclone that were so much of what drew me to Transformers in the beginning. By the time I received Red for Christmas 1986 (with Ultra Magnus) that era was drawing to a close, and it would be a few years before I'd have a chance to appreciate the die-cast automobiles of the early days again.
Henkei! Red is himself from a period in Transformers history that's long since passed, when the focus of the designers was more on creating modernised versions of characters from G1 rather than bringing the character designs from the Sunbow show to life. From the perspective of a collector in 2021 his robot mode is... inelegant, to put it mildy. The knee kibble is particularly awkward. But there's still a lot of good stuff going on here: the head popping up as you rotate the roof during conversion to robot mode remains fun, and the light piping is off the charts, somehow even better than on the Sideswipe version of this mould.
Where this toy shines is the car mode, taking the already fantastic Sunstreaker / Sideswipe vehicle form and adding new elements such as the light bar and a chromed version of the spoiler. I ended up taking a ton of photos of the Lambos as a trio because they just look so good together, but I'll save those for another post!
#Transformers#Henkei! Henkei!#Red Alert#2009#CHUG#Generation 1#tf g1#g1 transformers#Takara#takaratomy#toys#action figures#autobots
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Ok y’all, I’m sorry I’m having to catch up! We got a new foster in a few days ago - a particularly broken soul - and my mind has been *entirely* on him. But he’s settling in a little now, so here’s the last 3 days in one post ☺️
Autism Acceptance Month
Day 10!
“Sensory Life”
This is sort of hard to describe, but I’ll try! This is different from the next entry about stims, though both are sensory related.
It’s like being on microdosed ‘shrooms *all the time*. If you don’t know what that’s like, I’ll try to describe (this is collaborated with a friend who regularly does this - I don’t...it would probably be far too overwhelming).
Colors are far sharper to me & I emotionally react to them far more than most people. That results in some colors being genuinely offensive - not just “I don’t like that color”, but it will make me intensely angry or physically sick. This makes me curious about chromotherapy, but I haven’t really looked into it that much. My tolerance of certain colors can ebb and flow depending on my emotional state/mindset. (This crap is so sharp, I’m actually getting a twinge of irritation just *thinking* about my most hated colors LOL 😂 🤦🏻♀️)
Textures/skin sensations are another big one. (By now you may be asking, how TF did this chick manage Marine Corps training/exercises?!) I guess if you want something bad enough, you can shut down some of the overwhelming aspects of the sensory thing...this ability to disassociate probably isn’t what NT’s would call “healthy”, but it’s quite handy if you’re autistic, and those of us who have been through real trauma seem to be especially skilled with our ability to just shut off all circuits and “embrace the suck”). Like...I’ll nearly panic to get out of a store or something if my underwear starts feeling uncomfortable, but I’ve literally been soaked head to toe, covered in mud and sand in my *everywhere* (and I HATE SAND anywhere but on my feet) AND I pissed myself, because nobody’s gonna stop shooting/training just because you have to go potty 🙄), and I remember literally giving zero fucks about it...so it really is entirely a mindset thing. But let’s talk about when I’m NOT in “Marine mode” (cuz let’s face it, it’s been close to two decades since I got out, and I no longer HAVE to tolerate overwhelming sensations).
Sensory input is just basically dialed to 11 & the knob’s been snapped off. Bright lights, loud discordant noises, too much touching/not touching the right way, things like that. I am particularly sensitive about body hair (my own). I *strongly* prefer to have my head shaved on the back and sides (but I leave the top long). The only time I haven’t done this, was in the Marines (it was considered “eccentric” and not allowed, so they made me grow it out). Even though I leave the main part long, it’s *always* in a bun or ponytail - well, unless I’m super dressed up for something, but even then I prefer some sort of updo. Despite the fact that I like my long hair (well on the top anyway), I can’t *stand* the way it feels on my neck or especially my face - I HATE IT when my hair touches my face. If I wasn’t married...there’s a decent chance I’d just shave it all off and be done with it LOL 😆 My ponytail pulled through the back of a baseball hat is I guess what they’d call my “signature look”.
And you think NT’s have bad misophonia? *I’ve jumped out of a moving vehicle before* to get away from the noise of someone chewing loudly/smacking their lips in the back seat (he was a coworker and punching him in the mouth - which is what I DESPERATELY wanted to do - would have gotten me fired 😕)...but humans eating, or dogs licking their junk, makes me want to crawl out of my own skin. It’s mostly humans though....you have *no idea* the level of self discipline it takes to keep me from either rage crying or actually getting violent around someone smacking their mouth during a meal. I *cannot* be around my husband when he’s eating breakfast cereal even though he’s a very mannered eater - I don’t know why, but it’s *so loud* (and I’m terribly hard of hearing) - it sounds like he’s chewing rocks. It took us years to work this problem out LOL - he thought it was dumb that I had such a deeply emotional reaction. Then he tried to “chew quietly”, which all that did was slow down the rock tumbler inside his mouth 😂...gradually, for everyone’s sanity, we realized that cereal eating should not be done in close proximity to each other lololol....and now, when it’s time for family meals around the table, I’ve learned to either keep the range hood fan going (white noise is definitely my friend), or have the TV on. If it’s just mainly the sound of everyone chewing, I simply won’t eat at the table. I lose my appetite. (And all of my dinner guests/family are very polite diners. It’s MY hangup.) Phone calls are another big one. I could probably come up with several reasons why I hate it...I LOATHE it. This is one sensory hangup some people in my family just refuse to accept. I don’t think they realize I equate unexpected or immediately demanded phone calls to running naked though a mall or getting a root canal. Hissssssssss!! Give me some time to prepare myself for this shit please - you’re actually asking a *lot* from me. (And when I do have a call? Ugh I babble and am so awkward, because I’m so effing uncomfortable, which I also hate.)
But here’s an area where my “sensory overload” serves me very well:
Dogs.
I am usually *intensely* dialed into the energy and body language of an animal, but particularly dogs. I’m *so* sensitive to them, that I often actually can feel things even happening behind my back - can basically sense the energy in the area shift. (Roughly 75% of the time. I’m spacey sometimes too LOL.) The work I do with “behaviorally challenged” dogs is the biggest area where I am *grateful* for my autistic mind. I don’t think I could really do the things I do without it, successfully. (I can do this to a large degree with people as well, as can my youngest son. You cannot lie to that boy about your feelings or mood.)
We all have different levels of sensory sensitivity and different triggers, but every autistic I know has several “sensory hangups”. It often is one of our biggest hurdles to deal with, when it comes to “normal functioning”. So, many of us constantly have headphones (or muffs) on, some of us wear sunglasses *all the time*, etc (I wear a baseball hat - and I genuinely don’t like going anywhere where I have to get dressed up and can’t wear my hat. Been like that since my early teens. That hat shields me from all sorts of real and imagined sensory triggers.) You do what you can to mitigate, you know? But my “microdosing shrooms” and “knob dialed to 11 and snapped off” is really the best way I can summarize. (And that’s not all bad - my trips into a new natural space, like the redwoods, is an absolute *thrill*. I also occasionally love sensory overload - many auties do - like rollercoasters. My youngest son and I can ride till we pass out LOL!) So sensory life is love/hate, really....but I don’t think I’d change much about it.
Except the fucking misophonia. I hate that I go into almost a murderous rage over someone just chewing food loudly 🤦🏻♀️ - but seriously. It’s impolite anyway. Don’t do it. 😆
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Day 11!
Stims
This is one of the biggest areas where neurotypicals struggle to understand us.
We all have stims. Stims are basically any stimulus that brings us joy or comfort. It could be rocking, flapping, walking in tight little circles, clicking your fingernails together, spinning, making weird sounds or whistling, etc. And it’s usually repetitive - that’s the part that gets on people’s nerves.
I’ve found that most *women* hide most of our stims. We only let go and stim our little hearts out when we’re alone. I do that, because some of my stims grate on my husband. Sometimes I don’t WANT to feel “watched” anyway...I’ve noticed males don’t have quite the same issue with that.
I have quiet stims I do to soothe myself, and happy stims. One of my quieter stims when I’m trying to soothe myself (like in public) is clicking my teeth, particularly my right canines. I also have this silicone bite stick I wear around my neck sometimes, that I chew on (my sons like the bite sticks as well). I carry a little bag of fidget toys in my purse, to soothe myself with when I’m stressed. There’s a thing sort of like a fidget cube, a little cowrie shell and twine bracelet that I fiddle with almost like a rosary, a small stuffed axolotyl (her name is Blossom), and a few other toys. My little stash also comes in damn handy when I encounter a bored child LOL!
One of my sons makes funny little sound effects randomly (and he’s grown & still does it). The other used to randomly shriek when he was younger - then he learned how to whistle, so he couldn’t say a whole sentence without punctuating it with little whistles (we actually thought it was adorable).
My favorite stim is putting my headphones on, putting on some favorite music, sitting with my legs crossed, closing my eyes, and rocking. I’m happy to TELL you about this stim, but it’s one I do alone, because I like to get completely lost in it and I can’t do that if I feel I’m being watched...and you’ll damn near give me a heart attack if you touch me while I’m lost in that world. (And boy does it irritate me to get yanked out of that before I’m ready, for some bullshit non emergency reason.) Better to just isolate myself (except my dogs are always with me). Another one I do alone - and I have no idea why i like it so much - is squeaking my bite stick across my teeth. (This one is weird to me because I usually HATE my teeth being touched...yes dentists are a problem.) This one I enjoy doing kind of mindlessly while I read, but damn would it irritate anyone in listening distance LOL...I mean, it would irritate the shit out of ME if someone else was doing it, because *other people’s* repetition, especially if it makes noise, gets on my damned nerves. 🙄 Figures lmao!
Stims can be damaging sometimes, though. Like I used to twist and twirl my hair when I was younger so much that the areas I usually grabbed were frayed and broken (I also chewed my hair sometimes). One stim I cannot break myself of even though sometimes it’ll make me bleed, is chewing the insides of my cheeks or my lips. That’s my most frequent (several times a day) one, and the one that is both gratifying *and* soothing. It’s also the one that’s hardest to suppress.
Some auties are either unaware or literally don’t care how you feel about their stims, but I am and do. I’d like to think I’m pretty “appropriate” *most* of the time with my stims and other people around, except the lip/cheek chewing. If my husband notices I’ve gotten pretty furious about it (even using my hand to push my cheek into optimal biting position), he’ll gently put his hands on mine to bring me back to awareness - if I’m gnawing away, I’m either super stressed or way lost in thought. Either way, I can accidentally hurt myself, so he gently guides me away/distracts me.
Stimming is an important part of Autie life and should not be discouraged unless it hurts Your Pet Autie ™️.
And if you’re looking for a neat gift for an Autie? They actually make stim toy packs. Get them one, they’re fun. ☺️ (Most stim toys are designed to withstand being put in mouths and bitten/chewed, too - LOTS of us have oral fixations.) And hey, even if you’re a NT, try stimming sometime (lots of normal people have stims, they just don’t realize that’s what they are - like nail biting. Bite your nails a lot? Get a bite stick!! God they’re so satisfying!)....
Happy stimming!
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Day 12!
“Favorite Autism Charity”
This one is short and easy: ASAN. Autism Self Advocacy Network.
“The Autistic Self Advocacy Network is a nonprofit organization run by and for individuals with autism. According to its mission statement, the Network’s goal is ‘to empower autistic people across the world to take control of our own lives and the future of our common community, and seek to organize the autistic community to ensure our voices are heard in the national conversation about us.’”
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Day 13!
“Family”
Well that’s kinda ambiguous, isn’t it? 😒
I’ll start with this tack:
Being an autistic mom with autistic kids.
I mean for years, none of us KNEW LOL - and maybe that’s what took me so long to get around to pursuing a formal diagnosis for my youngest. To me, for the longest time, he was just sensitive and different like me (same with my oldest, for the most part, but I’m pretty sure that was me buying into the “brilliant people are just fucking weird ok” mindset also), yannow? So it was like, “well mama always told me I’d have one like me & then know what I put her through” 🙄 My oldest got lumped into the “all bright kids are quirky” category - but as I learned about ASD through my youngest and myself, it became damn obvious the oldest was also in our camp. (He’s taken the prelim test now anyway, but is not formally diagnosed.) I genuinely believe that our “shared weirdness” binds us very tightly to each other - and I’m super pleased about that.
It brought a whole new level of understanding and awareness within our little family when we realized it was ASD I guess - and acceptance. (I 100% believe that diagnosis - or even affirmation - is critical to our self acceptance and understanding.) I wouldn’t trade my little family for anything, and consider myself remarkably blessed. I can talk about how complex and brilliant my boys are ALL day (and often do LOL). Hubby is neurodivergent, and can identify with (or at least sympathize with) MANY of our hangups....but he’s “normal” enough that he’s been able to guide us (mostly me) with things like how to use tact (not often a skill we naturally possess lmao). My heart breaks when I read posts by auties whose families either don’t understand or don’t accept them & are constantly trying to basically mute who they are. Auties “live out loud”, and some people find that off putting. I know growing up, I was constantly getting my ass chewed for being “dramatic” or too sensitive, too, so I shut down and hid my sensitivity far, far away. I’m only *lately* (last few years) discarding that silly tough girl mask. (I can still be quite the little wolverine at times, but I’m not afraid to show my soft sensitive actual self anymore...to stay soft in today’s fucked up world takes actual courage - a lot of it - and strength. I was looking at the concept of being “strong” entirely the wrong way.)
I swear my husband has lived with nearly as many phases and facets, as years we’ve been together. Sometimes I ask him if this ever bothers him. He says no, because who I am at my core never changes...and he grins and says “and you damn sure aren’t boring” 😂
But since I’ve known I’m autistic, I’ve given myself more freedom to discover who I am without these socially dictated parameters. And permission to be precisely who I am, without cringing apologies when the real me shines through awkwardly.
And my husband and boys have been there every step of the way, embracing me, as we do with them. ♥️
Yeah. I love my family. We’re some pretty cool people. 😁
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Sometimes i love the petty bullshit in this fandom
So.
A whole mess of new official reveals dropped in the Transformers fandom today, courtesy of the ongoing news releases out of Toy Fair, and there’s one little thing in an announcement on TFW2005 that just speaks to me.
These little dudes, these absolute block-shaped little bastards, are part of the upcoming line of releases for the “Earthrise” portion of War For Cybertron.
Skar, Knok, [REDACTED, we’ll get to him in a bit], and Wingthing.
The first two are a bit of a deviation from their roots, but a perfectly reasonable way to implement them into the current toyline, and the last was already traditionally a Ratbat repaint, so all is well.
Then there’s this f*cker.
You will note, he is BLUE.
For those not familiar, one of the longest running wars in the TF fandom (likely only losing to ‘trukk not munky’ and other G1 purisms) is over what are the ‘proper’ colors for Decepticons Rumble and Frenzy. The way in which people handle this ranges from intentionally exaggerated seriousness with a wink and a nod, all the way to torches being brandished as the opponents dig themselves into their foxholes.
So when the news of this release, and the toy being labeled as Rumble, hits, one of the most prominent TF news sites felt the need to put a disclaimer in the announcement.
Rumble (that’s what the description says)
The person posting this news basically put the TF equivalent of “don’t @ me” as an asterisk on this.
I love what a self-aware pile of pettiness and drama this fandom and the subsequent lore are at times.
#transformers#rumble#ribfir#rumble is blue frenzy is red#die mad about it#casseticons#fandom#fandoms#earthrise#war for cybertron#wfc earthrise#firrib#fibrir#rirfib
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