#it shouldn't be this way | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

asteraceae-blue · 1 year

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My kid is starting Kindergarten in the fall and I just... I don't know how I'm going to send her into that campus on the first day and not sob with worry. One of the reasons we picked the school we did was because they had ground to ceiling metal fences between the buildings with no way in except a locked gate and the front office.

Seriously, how do other American parents do this? I'm sick with worry before it's even started.

#school shootings #life in the USA #I hate guns #it shouldn't be this way

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tiktoksinspo · 2 years

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#omg #sad reality #guns #women #wtf #fuck society #abortion #damn #it shouldn't be this way #america #disgusting #tiktok #tiktoks #@nobosart

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unpretty · 3 months

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the thing about having been really broke. averaging $500 a month in a good year broke. using a gamestop credit card i shouldn't have qualified for to buy taco bell gift cards for food broke. is that i am SO bad with money. i have a degree in accounting and i am so bad with money. i do not think of myself as superstitious at all but money feels so cursed. not in a spiritual way, i mean literally. practically.

having 'too much' money feels so bad. money is a thing you spend as soon as you get it because it's so cursed. the more it is the more cursed it is. i save too much money and bad things will happen that cost all my money. money is a thing that summons expenses. if i have no money and the car breaks down i find a way to make it work. i scrounge and resell and pass the hat and talk to my mom's friend's friend who knows a guy and in the end i'm so relieved to be right back where i started. but if i were saving my money for a new computer and then the car broke down, the money is just gone. i spent the money i saved for a thing i wanted on a thing i needed instead and after all that hoping i'm right back where i started.

i get a windfall and i set the money aside because if i'm careful that's enough to pay for gas for months. but then i need to pay for heat and i apply for assistance and they look at my bank account and see i have money and now they won't help pay for heat. soon it's just a habit. i get the money and i spend the money. immediately, as soon as possible, get this money away from me. don't even save enough for cigarettes. i can find money for cigarettes, somehow i can always find money for cigarettes. cigarette money is a weird magical fake money i summon from dark corners whenever i run out of cigarettes. i don't know how it works either. i've tried to summon the cigarette money for things that aren't cigarettes and it never works. just get this out of my bank account. get it out of here before something notices there's money here.

anyway i'm working on it but god it's hard

#original #i think i've made this exact same post before but everyone politely ignore that my memory is bad #i was doing better and then it all crashed and burned in the last couple months #and i'm fixing it but god it feels so stupid #i'd finally worked my way up to having Savings. Any Savings At All. where did it go.#how did i spend that much on pennywhistles and moonpies #that shouldn't be possible that's illegal

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bigfatbreak · 3 months

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dad villain au: did emilie just. not consider at all that adrien was literally dying at the time. wow

she's in the habit of deciding when Adrien's suffering is acceptable, and if it is, she'll just fix it later.

#my art #adrien agreste #emelie agreste #gabriel agreste #dad villain au #mayura #as emelie faces zero consequences using the peacock she's more likely to utilize it in a way she didn't in the last timeline #last timeline she faced real problems. had to come to terms with her own eventual death. got to see action and reaction in process #in this timeline there was no consequences. so why shouldn't she make this as 'perfect' as possible?#before gabriel got his memories of the last timeline back he was actually pretty against her being weird abt adrien but eventually just #let her do whatever lmao. he was like. alright fine if it makes you happy dear #sure you can rearrange his genome so he cant catch chicken pox again whatver #as a result when things dont fit her delusions she gets upset moody or aggressive

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kindnessoverperfection · 11 months

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Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.

NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.

I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.

The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.

Because it's so hard to exist in this world.

My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:

Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)

Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.

Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.

Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.

Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.

Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s

I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.

So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".

Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)

Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.

If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.

NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD

Stigma in the DSM

Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)

"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."

(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)

#actuallynpd #signal boost #actuallyautistic #mental health awareness #narcissistic personality disorder #people also need to realize that mental health professionals aren't immune from bias #(it really shouldn't come as a shock that the mental health field has a longstanding pattern of misunderstanding and mistreating ppl who ar #mentally ill or otherwise ND)#the first therapist i brought up NPD to like. literally pulled out the DSM bc she could barely remember the criteria. then said that there'#no way I have it because I have low self-esteem lmaoooooo #anyway throwback to being at work and chatting with a co-worker. and the conversation turning to mental health. and him saying that #he tries to stay informed and be aware and supportive of mental health conditions & that he doesn't want to be ignorant or spread harmful #misinformation. and then i mentioned that i do a lot of research into mental health stuff and i listed a bunch of things. which included #several personality disorders. one of which was NPD.#and after listening to my whole ass list he zeroed in on the NPD and immediately started talking about how narcissists are abusive and #he knew someone who had NPD and how the person who had it had an addiction and died from the addiction in a horrible way and he #was glad he did #fun times #or when i decided to be vulnerable and talk abt my self-criticism/self-hatred bc i knew my friends also struggled w that and i wanted to #support them by sharing my own coping methods. and they both(separately!) started picking and prodding at my npd through the lens of stigma #bc i'd recently opened up to them abt having it. they recognized self-hatred as a symptom and still jumped on me for it. despite me #trying to share hurt vulnerable parts of myself to help them and connect with them.#again..... fun times

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powdermelonkeg · 1 year

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Okay but genuinely why is the no fly list a USA government secret. Shouldn't it be public knowledge anyways? Genuinely who benefits from keeping it secret.

#someone explain this to me like i'm five please #esp because you can get banned from flying if your name is SIMILAR to one on the no fly list so shouldn't they give advance warning #that way you can show up with the proper paperwork???

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backroadboy · 4 months

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save me stanford era dean save me

#the way there is a lack of standford era dean content is just....#he's my bestie #pilot dean also #they are just so special to me yknow #ugh....#maybe– yeah i shouldn't go there #txt.

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skeletoninthemelonland · 9 months

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Gabriel, Jeremy, Susie and... Vanessa? Vanny???

oh, and Glitchtrap too (he's in the computer Vanessa is holding)

#Vanessa is a prodigy in this au #makes me think she'd be William's apprentice #WHAT IF UH. VANNY WANTED TO CREATE AN AI AND IT ACTUALLY WORK SO WELL THAT-#THE AI GAINED CONSCIOUSNESS TO THE POINT IT TALKED BACK TO HER IN A SCARY WAY AND ALMOST ACTED LIKE A VIRUS IDK #and then Max (Mxes) showed up like 'VANESSA! YOU SHOULDN'T BE TALKING TO STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET' and it is referring to Glitchtrap lmfao #and then Vanessa convinces it to talk to Glitchtrap-#ONLY FOR THEM TO GET ANNOYED AT EACH OTHER #springdad au #fnaf #five nights at freddy's #my art #freddy fazbear #bonnie the bunny #chica the chicken #fnaf vanessa #vanny

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gonnaeatyourgirlfriend · 2 years

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the guilt you feel leaving, disliking or hating your own parents has to be one of the most heartbreaking feelings.

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grandwretch · 4 months

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i so badly want one of those fic examinations of steve's relationship with joyce and hopper but solely through eddie's pov like hear me out

steve and eddie chat a lot in the upside down (and later in the hospital, when they learn hop is alive). steve has taken charge of filling eddie in on the rest of their of-age crew without the kids butting in. he never mentions his own parents, but he talks about the rest of the party's a lot, especially joyce and hopper. eddie knows what it's like to desperately want someone to be your parent and trying to hide it from his own childhood, when he would try to be cool about wayne dropping him off at his dad's house. steve obviously adores joyce and hopper, thinks the world of them and legitimately looks up to them.

eddie isn't sure what he expects from a cop who came back to life and the world's most determined housewife, but he's excited to meet them as someone steve loves.

cue eddie's horror when he realizes that neither of them really feel much for steve rather than annoyance and vague distrust. that joyce trusts will with eddie, an accused murderer, in a heartbeat and still hesitates to leave him with steve. that hopper brushes off every ounce of steve's hero worship and joy.

he tries to broach the topic with steve, gently, and is heartbroken when steve genuinely has no idea what he's talking about. and not because he's oblivious, but because steve thinks that's what he deserves. he thinks that's the parental love that someone who was an asshole in high school needs, because that's what would make him a good person. he needs people to call him out constantly, obviously, because why else would they keep doing it? why would nancy? at least they're here. at least they're not ignoring him. at least they're not forcing him into a box. they just want him to be better.

like, this is the man who thanked a girl for calling him bullshit and telling him she never loved him. he doesn't Know that's not how you're supposed to handle things. no one ever taught him that.

and now eddie's gotta figure out how he can teach steve how to be loved the right way without outing himself and his huge crush on his love-starved dork of a friend.

#shut up az #steddie #i just had the flash of eddie in a hospital bed staring up at hopper and the way he talks to steve in horror #like hopper saying something off the cuff about how he's not surprised there was so much collateral with steve in charge #and eddie thinking about steve always putting himself in harm's way #and the way steve got mauled by bats way before eddie did and then KEPT. GOING. but no one is mentioning that #no one is mentioning that steve was the first one of their group physically hurt by this.#and steve is just nodding like he agrees and eddie doesn't want to be rude bc these ppl are obviously Important to his friends #and then Mike comes in later and says something Mike-y and Eddie snaps at him #then he has to apologize because Mike is a stupid kid who loves Steve in his own way #and Eddie shouldn't blame him for the behavior of adults who should no better just because Mike is an easier target #anyway Eddie doesn't know how to have parents right either so he ropes Jeff and Lucas and Gareth and Robin into OP: Teach Steve Self-Worth

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qqchurch · 9 months

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you know you're in a cishet male gamer discord when you see stuff like this without pushback in comment to people being mad or baffled by a gacha girl having a complete joke of proportions 🫡🫡🫡

#definitely shouldn't check servers im in just after waking up cause i forgot how much of a cognitohazard they are now #between this server having 'progressive but not TOO progressive' gamers (aka dont be an annoying queer)#and the other having ppl way too casually racist #it really is something to see servers i joined years ago just shifting rightward and no one else finds it weird #basically a ghost now in those places because damn #and dont tell me i should speak up because wtf am i supposed to do if im literally the only person that would comment on this #qq posts

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pitske · 25 days

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queer people?

#pitskederdoenerhaendler #pitske’s art #w2h film #w2h #welcome to hell film #w2h jonathan #w2h sock #sockathan #I am insaning today please send no help I need to suffer in silence and lonely #except that Tecs with me in vc HELLO MIKKEYYY #anyway. I drew the gays #I like them so much I think they shouldn't kill themselves #I got a vision for drawing today. I just fnally needed to get these out of my system #I was asked if I would post them today or tomorrow but you have to understand my schedule does not exist and posting happens on a whim #either way stay safe y'all love you

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uncanny-tranny · 8 months

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Love disabled people who just lie about their disabilities to nosy, intrusive questions. Sorry, yeah, I lost my arm in the wash one day. It's funny how that happens! Oh, I got back pain from saving nineteen children from a burning fire department <3

#disability #sometimes lying is just. funny. SORRY.#look like... whether you lie about why you're disabled you're still disabled and it shouldn't have to factor into how you're treated...#...if it isn't relevant to your care needs or care plan.#like. if you lost your arm does it matter if you say you lost it in the wash like a sock or tell your actual story...#...like either way you still /do not have an arm/. that doesn't change if you lie or not #anyway. huge defense for a post that probably didn't need said defense #sometimes you just feel like lying in such a grandiose way that people don't know if they SHOULDN'T believe you #i think my lie will be that a powerful necromancer preformed Emergency Bone Shaving on one leg only...#...and he used the bone shavings to raise a skeleton army that looks like My skeleton but only on the legs

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ffcrazy15 · 4 months

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Someone needs to do an analysis on the way the Kung Fu Panda movies use old-fashioned vs. modern language ("Panda we meet at last"/"Hey how's it going") and old-fashioned vs. modern settings (forbidden-city-esque palaces/modern-ish Chinese restaurant) to indicate class differences in their characters, and how those class differences create underlying tensions and misunderstandings.

#This is neither a criticism nor a compliment of that artistic choice #I just think it's really interesting #Like even looking at the Five:#Tigress talks in an older style than the others because she was mainly raised at the Jade Palace #While Mantis talks like Joe-schmo off the street because he *was* a streetfighter and an ordinary guy #Shifu and even Tai Lung talk like they're from an old-fashioned novel or kung fu movie #Po talks like a modern guy you'd meet working in a twenty-first century family restaurant #Part of Tigress's initial disdain for him in the first movie is clearly because she considers him to be low-class/a commoner #(And therefore an intruder into the world of the Jade Palace and the rest of the Kung Fu masters which appears to be semi-noble).#Shen looks genuinely off-put and disgusted when he has to respond to Po's greeting with a “...hey.”#And when Po wants to appear more legitimate as a warrior he adopts a more “legendary”/old-fashioned way of speaking.#In the aesthetic language of KFP old fashioned=noble/upper class and modern=common/lower class.#This translates entirely naturally—I think especially to an American audience—but it is wild once you notice it #Because you realize: “Hang on—shouldn't *all* these characters be talking like they're living in the medieval era?”#“And what does it mean that they're not? What is the movie attempting to convey with this—probably entirely subconscious—artistic choice?”#kung fu panda

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sboochi · 1 year

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Ngl, I'm very proud of this one :)

#new nose for hiccup bc the old way I drew it didn't win me over #I know lineart is like the one thing this style shouldn't have but it's so muc easier for me #rotbtd #the big four #rise of the brave tangled dragons #httyd #brave #tangled #rotg #tangled the series #tts au #my art

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calware · 11 months

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genuinely what is the worst that could happen if you stop apologizing for liking homestuck or if you stop saying things like "homestuck is cursed don't read it it's so bad don't make the same mistakes as me save yourself while you can etc etc" when in actuality you enjoyed it. what's the worst that will happen if you just enjoy it like a normal person

#yes there are going to be people who don't like homestuck that will find you annoying for liking homestuck #and i understand that you can't jedi mind trick your way out of feeling the need to have everyone like you #but i promise that it's okay if someone finds you annoying. you can't have everyone on the planet like you. and that's okay!!#you shouldn't value the opinion that every single person online has of you

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