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#it doesn't feel done but i can't think of what else to do so
quintinh43 · 15 hours
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3 Times Quinn Almost Proposed + 1 Time He Actually Did
The best decision Quinn ever made was you. From the second he stumbled into that Cafe with his parents, to moving in with you, to admitting he loved you and everything else in between. It was a no-brainer that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. And there was no doubt in his mind that you felt the same way.
"I can't believe you're proposing," Jack said, tapping his fingers against the center console of Quinn's car. He never could sit still, and sometimes it grated on Quinn's nerves.
"Why? Do you think it's too early?" Quinn asks anxiously, running his tongue against his lips.
Luke pitches forward from the back seat to share his input, "You've been dating for like what? Five?" He asks, doing some quick math on his fingers.
Quinn nods, "Since March,"
"Ya know, we still haven't forgiven you for not telling us immediately," Jack huffs, crossing his arms over his chest.
"If it's any consolation, you are the first people I wanted to tell," Quinn says placatingly.
"Quinner, go easy on our uneducated brother, he doesn't know what the word consolation means," Luke says seriously.
Quinn snorts a laugh as Jack turns around to swat Luke on the head. "I have a bigger vocabulary than you dumbass!"
Before the two of them can escalate into a full-blown bickering match, Quinn interrupts, "Back to my problem, guys! Do you think it's too early to propose?" His fingers tap nervously on the steering wheel as he navigates to the jewellery store.
"There's no proper timeline when it comes to proposing Quinny, it comes down to when you are ready and you feel like it's the right time in your relationship," Jack says.
"I mean, you already knew you wanted to spend the rest of your life with Y/n, so this is just taking the next step towards that, isn't it?" Luke adds, adjusting his Devils Hockey cap over his curls.
"When did you two become so wise?" Quinn grumbles as he pulls into the parking lot.
"We've always been wise beyond our years," Luke says puffing his chest out. Jack flicks his cap off his head, rolling his eyes.
"Sure Lukey," Quinn snorts, running a hand through his hair.
"Alright boys, let's get this done." Jack claps, practically jumping out of the car.
It wasn't hard at all. Quinn chose a shop where he could completely customize the ring, and with access to your Pinterest board and all the rings that you already own, he knew almost exactly how he wanted it to look. The only thing he was nervous about was whether or not you would like it.
"Don't overthink it too much Quinn, you know her better than you know yourself," Jack squeezes his shoulder comfortingly.
"You could propose with a ring pop, and she would treasure it for the rest of her life," Luke adds, with a roll of his eyes.
The three of them are in and out of the shop within an hour, and Quinn is smiling his ass off all the way home.
1.
A week later, Quinn picks up the ring. It's even better than he imagined it would be in real life. As his car pulls into the driveway of the lakehouse, he sees you out front with his mom, helping her tend to her garden.
You kneel in the dirt, sunglasses perched on your nose, and a canucks cap on your head. Smiling and laughing with Ellen as you both pull weeds from the ground. Quinn's heart beats out of his chest with happiness, and he's struck with the urge to kneel in the dirt next to you and present the ring to you right then.
When you notice that he arrived, you grin widely, giving him a wave. There's dirt smudged across your nose and under your nails, and Quinn thinks the ring would be a lovely accessory to your mud-stained hands.
The outline of the ring box feels warm in his pocket as he approaches you and his mom, "Hi babe," he greets, dropping a kiss to the top of your head, and it takes everything in his bones not to get down on one knee and pull out the ring right now.
"Hi Mom," he says with a quiet smile, giving her a kiss on the cheek. Her eyes twinkle knowingly.
"Jack and Luke are napping upstairs, and the two of us are going to start lunch as soon as we're done this."
Quinn nods, "Lemme change and I'll come help you two," he runs up the stairs, tucks the ring box safely at the top of his closet and changes into shorts and a t-shirt to help you and his mom in the garden.
2.
Quinn never expected to be the guy who obsessively walked around with his engagement ring in his pocket after he bought it. But here he was, on the boat, with the ring sitting in the glove compartment. Which you had complete access to.
Jack had called him an idiot, stating that a number of things could've happened, from you finding the ring accidentally, or it falling into the water. Or maybe even a shark eating it. Luke was quick to call Jack an idiot, saying that there were no sharks in Lake Erie. Jack rolled his eyes and flicked Luke in the forehead saying it was to emphasize how stupid Quinn was being by bringing the ring with him onto the boat.
Quinn is currently in the driver's seat, you're on the wakeboard, and the rest of the boys are littered around the boat, whooping and cheering as you throw the rope and tip backwards into the water with a salute.
Trevor whistles low with admiration, "Wow, Mrs. Huggy is a professional,"
"She's not Mrs. Huggy yet, but she will be soon," Quinn mutters under his breath just as you climb the ladder back onto the boat.
It takes a minute for the words to register, but as soon as they do Trevor's jaw is on the floor. He stares back and forth between you and Quinn.
Jack, Quinn, and Luke wear various degrees of alarm on their faces, hoping and praying that you didn't hear anything.
"Damn, guys, was I that bad?" You laugh nervously, and you take in the looks on their faces. You unzip your life jacket and squeeze as much water out of your hair as you can.
"He-" Trevor starts pointing at Quinn, but before any words can actually leave his mouth, Jack is tipping Trevor over the edge of the boat and into the water.
You burst into laughter, and the boys seemingly return to normal as a soaking-wet Trevor climbs back into the boat, muttering obscenities under his breath. "Alright, who's next?"
"Me," Quinn says, desperate to get away from Trevor's pointed smirk, "You're driving," he says, pushing you gently into the driver seat where he was previously seated.
"Are you sure you want me to drive?" You ask skeptically, brow raised.
"O'course babe, there's no one I'd trust more." Quinn punctuated his sentence with a kiss on your cheek. Jack makes an offended noise, that sounds like a dying bird of some kind and you laugh at him.
Quinn rolls his eyes at him as he zips his life jacket and gets into the water for his turn on the wakeboard. He gives you a thumbs up, and parrots the movement, before slowly accelerating. You stand at the wheel of the boat, half twisted towards the back, so you can keep an eye on Quinn.
Quinn stands easily, and you smile accelerating a bit more. You turn in patterns that aren't too sharp but still make nice big waves for Quinn to ride. He's grinning like a madman. You maneuver the boat in a manner that gives him a wave to jump off of if he wants to.
He takes the opportunity, sailing through the air and managing a half spin before he hits the water. You drive around him in a slow circle as he resurfaces.
"That was fucking amazing! Where did you learn to drive a boat like that?" Trevor asks admiringly.
You shrug, cheeks heating under the praise, "My dad taught me," you say, crawling to the back of the boat and offering Quinn a hand as he climbs the ladder, "Been driving watercraft since I was like, twelve or something," you grin, squeaking as Quinn shakes his wet hair out in your direction, "You should see what I can do on a jet ski."
Jack whistles heartily, "We might have to take you up on that one of these days,"
"Sure, Jack, if you think you can handle getting your ass beat by a girl," you smirk. Jack scoffs offendedly, and Luke cackles from where he lies at the front of the boat.
Quinn is smiling so hard, his eyes crinkling at the corners, "I think we have to upgrade you to Captain for the summer, that was the best boat driving out of all of us," Quinn praises, pressing his lips to your hair.
"Seriously!" Jack says excitedly, scrambling for a life jacket, "That looked so fucking fun, no one can ever make waves like that! I'm next." He says jumping in the water before anyone can protest.
"Don't let this one get away Quinner," Luke says, tipping his hat in your direction, "Or I'll take her from you," he throws an over-exaggerated wink in your direction, you giggle and Quinn rolls his eyes. As if the shithead wasn't with him when he bought the ring.
Quinn eyes the glove compartment, where the ring is stored, and thoroughly debates how proposing right now would play out. A sharp whistle from Jack pulls him from his thoughts, and he takes his spot at the back of the boat as Jack spotter.
You resume your place in the driver's seat, and for the rest of the evening, that's where you stay.
Quinn almost has a heart attack when he sees you reach for the glove compartment, but Luke manages to fake trip into you just in time so that Jack can sneakily snag the box and relocate it to one of the other boat compartments.
3.
The house is completely full, with a bunch of the boy's friends who are visiting. Everyone is camped out around the fire pit, nursing beers and laughing loudly. You are curled up in Quinn's lap, head pillowed on his chest while you listen to all of the boys talk about their fondest memories.
You play with the strings of Quinn's hoodie, while he absent-mindedly traces patterns on your arm. His chest rumbles with laughter and his arm tightens around you, as Jack tells a story from when they played together for Team USA. An overwhelming wave of gratitude washes over you. You're grateful for everything in life, and most of all Quinn.
"You're quiet tonight," His lips are pressed against the side of your head, and the comforting baritone of his voice soothes your soul, "doing ok?"
You nod, bringing your fingers up to trace his jaw, "just thinking,"
"Penny for your thoughts?" He speaks low, his words only for your ears, the crackling of the fire, and hearty laughter fade into the background and at this moment it's as if you and Quinn are the only two people who exist.
He was a way of doing that. Making everything else disappear and making you feel like you're the only girl in the world. "I'm so grateful for everything," you answer quietly, "especially for you. Getting to experience life with you, being able to support you, having you there to support me- and just everything that you do and have done for me. You know?"
Quinn's heart swells so wide he thinks it might burst out of his chest. Before he really knows what he's doing, he's slipping out of the chair and kneeling in front of you. You huff because you were enjoying being curled into him.
His hands are on your thighs, and your hands cup his cheeks, thumbs tracing over his cheekbones. Neither of you has noticed that the laughter has died out, and everyone is watching the two of you. Their faces are a mixture of disgust and confusion.
Jack and Luke look downright horrified, sharing a look and exchanging silent words with their eyes.
"Will you m-" Before Quinn can complete his question, Luke is scrambling out of the lawn chair that he and Duker are curled up in and tackling Quinn to the floor.
"BEE!" Jack screeches, adding to the dramatics as he stands on his chair and points in the direction of where Quinn and Luke lay in the grass, "THERE'S A FUCKING BEE!"
There was no bee.
At Jack's distressed yelling, half of the boys are out of their chairs, running around and swatting at the heads of the non-existent bee.
You hold your stomach, laughing at the general chaos. It shouldn't be as funny as it is, but the sight of almost twenty grown men screaming about a bee is pretty hilarious.
"You are welcome you fucking numbskull," Luke hisses in Quinn's ear, as he helps him back up. Quinn gives him a sheepish smile of thanks. Were it not for his brother's antics, he would've regretted that being how he proposed for the rest of his life.
Once the general chaos dies down and everyone is back in their chairs calmly, you speak up with a smirk on your face, "You guys do know Bees are not nocturnal right?"
Quinn looks pointedly at Jack like he's an idiot. As if Quinn has the right to call him an idiot when he almost proposed to the love of his life in front of twenty hockey boys around a campfire on a Tuesday night.
"How do you know that?" Jack asks, crossing his arms over his chest with a pout.
"Yeah," Trevor scoffs, "Seems untrue,"
You snort, taking a sip of your beer, "I'm an elementary school teacher, dumbass, the science unit about bugs is practically ingrained in my brain. Bees are definitely not nocturnal."
"Nope, there definitely was a bee," Luke chimes, "I literally saved Quinn's life."
"Yeah, I saw it too," Dylan adds with a nod.
"It was basically the size of Quinn's head," Cole adds, "really Y/n/n I don't know how you didn't see it," Cole says matter-of-factly.
"I can't believe you guys are trying to gaslight me about bees right now," you snort, nuzzling further into Quinn's warmth.
"I heard it buzzing in my ear, babe," Quinn says seriously.
You roll your eyes at him and tuck your head under his chin and he wraps his arms around you securely, pressing a kiss to your hair, while you argue with the guys about Bees for the next half-an-hour.
+ 1
Quinn slips out of the bedroom to let you finish changing, he pads down the stairs to where his family waits in the kitchen. Jack presents him the ring box, that he had decided to keep with him after the boat incident. Quinn tucks it into his pocket with a deep breath.
"You ready Quinner?" Luke asks, squeezing his shoulder comfortingly.
"Yeah," Quinn nods, breathing deeply.
"She's gonna say yes," Jack reassures, giving Quinn a pat on the back.
"I hope so," Quinn says nervously.
His dad chuckles, "Don't worry kid, you're doing great compared to how nervous I was when I was proposing to your mother,"
Ellen laughs fondly, "It's true, he was so nervous he forgot to pull out the ring, and then when he finally did, he dropped it."
Jim rolls his eyes, but the smile stays. Quinn laughs at that, then all his anxieties are bubbling to the surface and spilling past his lips before he can stop them.
"What if she doesn't like the ring? What if she says no, and she thinks it is too soon? What if I fall on my face? What if I lose the ring? What if-"
Jack squishes his cheeks together to keep him from talking. He tips his forehead against Quinn's staring deep into his eyes. "Breathe with me, Quinn,"
Jack takes exaggerated breaths, and Quinn follows his lead. Jim and Ellen quietly slip out of the room, leaving the brothers to themselves.
Once Quinn's breathing returns to normal, Jack lets him go. "She loves you with her whole heart, Quinn. You have nothing to worry about," Luke says, bonking his head against Quinn’s affectionately.
"Thanks, guys," he murmurs, running a hand through his hair with a sigh.
Everything goes smoothly in Quinn's opinion. Even when he practically forgot his whole speech. But if he had to do it again, he wouldn't change a thing.
-
Yeah so this ended up being like 2.9k words....
Anyways enjoy friends!
So it's basically a fic but lazy.
Part of This Universe
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byerseason · 2 days
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why byler is the only logical way to end stranger things: a personal opinion
long post incoming. i've been thinking about what else can they do other than canon byler or is there any logical way which would please everyone. but i genuinely can't find any logical ending.
first of all, let's see the options i heard from people who doesn't think byler is gonna happen.
not adressing will's love for mike, mike never finding out about it and will's arc simply focusing on supernatural part : well, we all know that's impossible. not after spending a whole season to show us his deep love for mike. also it's confirmed that an emotional arc for him is what is gonna tie up the story.
"his love for mike was for him to explore his sexuality, he's gonna have another boyfriend." : they could easily show it to us without bringing mike into it. the byers moving to california was a perfect chance for it since it's a place better than hawkins when it comes to LGBT, they could easily give him a love interest, include him to their journey to find el just like they included argyle and give him a good character arc in s5, just like robin in s4. well, they didn't.
"mike is gonna reject will" : okay, then what was the reason of making him fall in love with mike? did the writers want to write a horrible story for the only gay child in the group? especially after showing us how miserable he feels about mike and how much he loves him? no.
now let's look deeper at the character arcs. my biggest reason to think byler is the only logical way is: will byers
i don't think i have to mention how much will suffered throughout the show and how he needs the happiest ending. they left season 4 at a point where everything about that love triangle is unresolved and they're obviously going to do something with it.
we all know mike is the one who understands will the most. he always been, since the very beginning. we've been shown that their bond is different and special. in a scenario where mike rejects will, we all know this is gonna be ruined. will is not gonna magically bury his love and go back to being besties with mike. and for mike, it's not possible for him to ignore will's love for him and stay friends as nothing happened. it would ruin their friendship for absolutely nothing.they can't simply take the only one who understands away from him.
will said he wants to spend the rest of his life with mike for two times. even if he doesn't have any hope, he desires it. so why giving him a love that he will never have? in this scenario will's character arc is literally "the gay kid always thought he will never have love just because he is gay, he thinks it's wrong and he is a mistake, well yes, he was right! he will never find the love and just watch the other straight people have it. thanks for watching stranger things." will's arc should be an arc where he is proven wrong, where he understands it's okay to love, where he is loved the way he loves, purely. otherwise his character arc is gonna be useless. where did we leave will in s4? he was thinking there's no chance for mike to love him and he has zero hope-- he ripped off the band aid. if mike rejects him the character arc and all the build up in season 4 becomes useless. he was at zero, and he is still at zero.
like i said giving him an arc where he is loved the way he loves was easy to be done without mike but now it's too late. they made it super clear that will doesn't want to be loved, he wants to be loved by mike. mike hurts him yet he still thinks mike makes him feel like he's not a mistake at all. that's not a simple crush. that's pure love. as a writer of a show you don't spend too much time to sympathize the characters love to the audience -something you never did with your other characters, at least not as much as will- you don't show them pouring their heart to a gift, just to waste it, just to make the character feel the worst they can feel just to make the person they love happy. will loves mike such a way that he prioritizes his happiness over his. this is what is gonna pay off.
the second character whose character arc needs byler: mike wheeler
mike has always been the most complicated character of the show, but most of his actions have no explanation other than him dealing with his own feelings. the show introduced mike as the leader of the party and i think it's okay to say he was one of the main characters in season 1 & 2. what happened after s2? a crazy character downfall. the audience started to dislike him and think he is useless. he didn't have any character development in the past 2 seasons. why? why? why?
because we all just watched him struggling. dealing with something inside of his mind that we don't know.
let's talk about a scenario where byler doesn't happen. this makes all mike's arc about being a love interest since s3. no development, no explanation for his behavior in the past 2 seasons. of course mike is traumatized and never talks to anyone which effects his behavior a lot. but there's still an unanswered question. why is he distancing himself from will specificially? the writers showed us that they understand each other the best, they know each other the best and notice if somethings wrong, so why is he distancing himself from the person who he needs the most as a best friend?
this is where we start to think if the problem is will himself, for mike.
why did we make will fall in love with mike just for mike to distance himself from will for no reason and make will upset? did we want will to suffer for no reason or create an empty storyline?
if mike is not how we think he is, he is going to end the show with an empty character arc who is nothing but a love interest, a side character. if mike ends up how we think he is, he is going to be the best onscreen representation of internalized homophobia. people think he is useless or just an asshole but he will turn out to be a perfectly written character who has his own arc.
people love to say "gay people didn't exist in 80s, byler would be unrealistic." which is completely wrong. gay people DID exist in 80s and they DID find love. did they have peace? they didn't. this is why mike and will are gonna be a real representation. we watched all the real struggles they went through. even if we don't get to see them as a couple, they will know they love each other by the end and that's what matters. and there's nothing unrealistic about it.
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riizeblr · 2 days
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alternatively: you being from a lower class and therefore struggling a bit with socializing at your uni. anton isn't like your groupmates tho. he is a bit pampered, but really nice and very hardworking - not at all like some spoiled, empty-headed brats with their trip plans and absent worries.
which is why you don't fully get how truly privileged he is (nepobaby, creative major, simple handmade trinkets on bags worth more than your rent) until well into your relationship. you should feel lucky, but instead you can't stop noticing how overly smooth everything was with you two. how he was always conveniently at right time at the library, picking up the book by your favorite author, leaving open on the table his artistic notes, sitting in the same reading room as you well into the evening. he should have had other things to do, no need to pick at a borrowed book when he can afford to get a perfectly new one, no need to study and study until late when he has a spacious house to go back to - unlike you and your noisy roommates. it just doesn't add up.
you want to ask him about those little things, but you can't. you feel ashamed. what would you be implying? that he is wrong not for telling you his family history (easily googled if only you'd bothered)? probably would simply look at you with a kind, understanding stare. it was much easier to not notice how condescending that stare is before.
(i love your brain; thank u.)
wait I love this…
you start noticing how easily he can use his access to things to get what he wants and how he does it without any sense of remorse. an extension on his finals or getting you out of trouble without so much as a warning with just a few words. he also abandoned those habits he had developed with you, but it was done so slowly and expertly that you hadn’t noticed that you were now adapted to his schedule and way of living. you realize you haven’t stepped foot into a public library for months and you spend more time in anton’s apartment than your dorm, leaving all your clothing and belongings there because anton bought you brand new things for his apartment. he’s so kind and gentle about it all that you feel bad for thinking that he had done it all in purpose.
you aren’t you sure how to bring the subject up to him but it eats at you every time he does it again. so you start making small comments like: I thought you didn’t have a copy of that textbook… isn’t that why we met that day in the library? anton never seems fazed when you say things like that. most times he doesn’t bother, but if he answers your questions he just makes up some excuse that never makes any sense but you’re too nervous to ask anything else.
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Oh yeah make sure neglected people get love until that neglected person is a fucking narcissist. Cause all narcissists are bad. Everything I do is intentionally manipulative or maybe they'll say I'm not actually a narcissist and are just confused or supporting them cause I've been made to feel guilty. I've been on both sides. People will believe I'm a narcissist and so therefore I'm abusive or people will not believe I'm a narcissist cause I'm too nice and just getting caught up in narcissists manipulating me to support them.
I hate the idea that my self image is not by my choice. I will always be what OTHERS perceive me as. I have always been that and it will continue to be that. People will either see someone that can't do any wrong or someone that can only do wrong. Like stfu I am a person! I can do good and bad! I have a past of being toxic and harmful esp as a teenager cause I was a fucking mentally fucked teen still in an abusive situation.
I just. I dunno. Im waiting on food so I'm very like just ranty about everything and anything. But like. Stfu. Stfu stfu stfu stfu stfu. If anyone else is needy and needs attention or reassurance then it's fine. But I have had it demonized since my fucking childhood and had my fucking meltdowns demonized as being intentionally manipulative!!! I WAS A FIVE YEAR OLD AUTISTIC CHILD STFU!!!!!
And people praising empathy as being good piss me off. Cause you know what else can also have hypoempathy? AUTISM. Low empathy is not just an "evil" personality disorder thing. Anyone can be anywhere on the scale of empathy. And it doesn't fucking matter. And anyone can be capable of good or bad. It has literally nothing to do with narcissism or any disorder.
Like wtf are anti narcissists gonna fucking do when they realize theyve done harm??? Cause you know what being someone believing in narc abuse did to me?! It made me believe that i was justified as a victim of narcissists so therefore I couldn't be wrong in my trauma responses.
Yeah. Accepting im a narcissist did way more for helping my relationships by allowing me to understand and communicate my needs than believing in narc abuse and calling my parents narcissists ever fucking did. Wtf are they gonna do when they're told about the harm they've done??? Not even related to narc abuse. I would have horrible episodes and defended myself cause I wasn't like my abusive "narcissistic" parents. And all it did was lead to more fights and more episodes and my friend couldn't help cause they were dealing with trauma responses too (people pleasing, believing it was okay what I did or that she deserved it even when I told her not to say or believe that, it's a very lengthy explanation required thing.)
Anyone and everyone is capable of good and bad and is capable of harming others. Whether it's full on abuse, even worse things, or just being insensitive and thoughtless. Focusing so much on the big bad narcissists will only continue to focus on this "us vs them" mentality that completely negates any sort of nuance and ignores the fact that harmful people, abusers, and even the worst of humanity is ALLOWED by society. It isn't a prevalence of narcissists, it is fucking bigotry. And it is everywhere. And it allows abuse to be normalized.
Big list of things I been thinking on. Fuck fuck fuck. I'm already fucking stressed and my parents won't stfu so I can think and type. Disorganized speech, semiverbal, can't thinky think.
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xxhexwolfxx · 8 hours
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Don't worry about it! I'm glad you took your time! Did you get a request? It's dating headcanons for Horangi, Rodolfo, Alejandro, and König with gn s/o. Thanks!
𝓓𝓐𝓣𝓘𝓝𝓖 𝓗𝓒𝓢
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A/N: Thank you so much for requesting! I’m so sorry it took so long for me to get this done! I unfortunately had to cut out Horangi. I thought I knew more about his character than I actually did. I hope that’s alright!
DISCLAIMER: None of these are really connected!
WARNINGS: None
CHARACTERS: König, Alejandro, and Rodolfo
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
König:
Loves the height difference between you two. It makes him feel like he can properly protect you.
I believe that he hates crowded places, but he forces through them for you. He doesn't even notice everyone else when you're with him.
Likes to work out with you there. He likes to show off his muscles and gets cocky when you compliment them.
He likes to call you nicknames that mean small. He thinks it's funny, but he also thinks it cute.
Loves to give bear hugs. He just scoops you up in his arms and holds you close. It always makes him happier afterwards.
Alejandro:
Loves to tease and flirt with you constantly. He especially likes it when it makes you blush.
Doesn't matter what insecurities you have. This man won't even let you think anything bad about yourself. He's always complimenting you.
He does call you sweet names in Spanish, he also loves calling you stupid things. This man will look you straight in your eyes, acting all sweet and then call you refrigerator or something.
He does get a bit jealous of people around you. He trusts you fully and he's not toxic about it. He just gets into his head too much and believes you can leave him just like that.
He loves to dance with you. Wether it's a slow dance or dancing in the kitchen while cooking, he loves it. He loves to do stupid dance moves to make you laugh.
Rudy:
Loves cuddling you. He can barely get out of bed because he loves cuddling you so much.
Just loves to tell you how much he loves you randomly. You can tell when he's going to do it because he gets this sweet look in his eyes as he looks at you.
I personally head canon that he loves to sing. If you can't sleep at night, then he will sing you soft songs. It's often you wake up to him singing while cooking your breakfast.
He loves to hold your hand when you guys go out. It's a simple way to show his love for you.
He loves to cook for you. He makes dishes from when his mother used to cook for him. It's another way he likes to show his love.
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muffinrecord · 14 hours
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I've been pretty positive about Yuu so far, but watching her magical girl story... hmm.
Basically I like everything about Yuu, but man that serial killer bit is the only thing that really sticks out as an overt bad choice. Having Nagisa stand around and watch Yuu kill people is such a weird choice, it feels more like fanfic than actual canon. Like this doesn't feel like something that could happen in Magia Record-- or hell, even in Madoka Magica either.
For example, Sayaka has a scene on a train where some dudes are being sexist assholes and it's left up to the viewer to decide if she kills them or not. It doesn't go: Sayaka killed them and also they were calling out for help the entire time while Madoka watched you know?
That said, this is something I can see in a bunch of the spinoffs (Kazumi, Oriko, Suzune), but I think everyone agrees that the spinoffs are of dubious quality. I love me the spinoffs but they're a hot mess.
I dunno. It's one thing to know that Yuu is a serial killer, it's another thing to have a character watch her go around and kill people and not intervene in any way. Especially in a story that goes out of its way to not do that. Walpy hitting Kamihama is noted to have no causalities at all (which goes a little too far in the other direction imo but it is what it is), Suzune isn't able to kill anyone in Kamihama and is dealt with by kicking her out (and not killing her), the deaths in arc 2 are mostly accidental and have massive consequences, everyone is forgiven in the end-- this isn't a story that really has "watch someone kill people and do nothing" in it's cards, you know?
I actually liked Nagisa's Wish for a lot of things. For example, I like that Nagisa didn't think she could be a magical girl until she saw Yuu, because she assumed that magical girls had to be good people-- aka, Nagisa did not think she was good. But that's not because Nagisa is a bad person. Nagisa is just unloved, and since she's a young kid, she's internalized that to mean that something is wrong with her, not that something is wrong with her mom. It's heartbreaking to see her go from "I can't be a magical girl," to seeing Yuu the murderer, to then going "oh okay if she can be a magical girl then so can I." Like sweet pea, your mother not loving you is not the same as being a killer. You've done nothing wrong. You are not a bad person for having Feelings and Emotions about the neglect you are experiencing.
However the serial killer/organ seller bit just goes too far for me and it kind of overshadows a lot of the better ideas present in Nagisa's Wish. Like how can you focus on the interesting ideas about justice or self worth when there is a serial killer/organ stealer walking around.
I think that the best qualities of Yuu are her design and how creepy she is-- having her actually go all the way and be a serial killer/organ seller actually makes her less creepy in my opinion. Yada yada, less is more, leave it up to the viewer's imagination. If she was just off, if we just knew that something was wrong with her and that people are disappearing but it's not outright stated what she's doing... I dunno. That would make her a lot more scary to me. A lot of fear can be found in apprehension and outright telling all the details will fill in too many gaps.
Like, the things that we all like about Yuu would be her voice direction, her memory issues, the way her Live2D is designed to be slightly off kilter from everyone else, the gap between her attitude and the darkness she engages in, the weird weaponry she uses and how it changes the way she walks/moves-- all of this is effective because it is offputting and different, not because the narrative is telling us "hey she kills people and sells their organs."
Basically I really love Yuu, but I do have some criticisms for her character and I understand why some folks don't like her.
That said, it did lead to this fantastic line from Kyubey so like,
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You take some, you lose some.
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irkimatsu · 3 days
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Idk if you ever thought about this but how would Husk react if his S/O was super self-conscious about their body? Whether thinking they’re way too skinny or way too fat. I feel like you, as the Husk professional, would know how to answer this because I am the exact opposite of a Husk professional. Much better with Angel Dust tbh.
Oh, trust me, as a certified fatass I have thought about this constantly. How would Husk feel about body types that aren't traditionally attractive?
Thankfully for me, my immediate instinct is that he doesn't care so much - sure, he has some physical preferences, but personality wins over everything else. It's part of why he's not swayed by Angel's initial flirting, I feel. He acknowledges that Angel is physically attractive, but the tryhard flirting was way too much of a turnoff. Conversely, even if he's not immediately drawn to someone's physical appearance, getting to know someone on a deeply personal level will attract him far harder than initial appearance ever could.
Not to say he doesn't see anything attractive in those non-traditional body types, of course. I do headcanon him as liking some squish on a partner for my own personal enjoyment, after all. Especially in the ass department. Husk hates to see you go but he loves watching you leave.
As for self-consciousness... trust me, he knows self-consciousness. I can go with him either being too skinny or overweight; either body type is the result of his awful self-care, especially ever since he lost the bet with Alastor. He drinks too much alcohol, he doesn't eat enough, and what he does eat has no nutritional value whatsoever. Any physical stamina he still has is bolstered by his innate demon powers; his muscles have all atrophied by now. But at the same time, we already know how Husk feels about wallowing alone in self-pity.
"You're not the only one down here who hates their body. Look at what I've done with mine! I got a second body after I destroyed my living one, and now I've gone and fucked this one up too. Maybe your choices led to how you look now, or maybe you just got saddled with a shitty form down here... but either way, hating yourself for it isn't going to get you anywhere. Who even benefits from your self-pity, anyway? Predatory jackasses who wanna sell you shit with the promise that it'll change you?
...I hope you don't feel like you need to change your body just for me. I like ya just the way you are. Love at first sight ain't my style anymore, but after I got to know you... just knowing who you are makes you the most beautiful person I've ever seen, both up there and down here. And besides, I've shown you exactly how I feel about my favorite parts of you plenty of times, haven't I, baby? Maybe I should remind you some more later tonight...?
If you wanna change, I'll support you. I know change is hard - fuck I know it's hard - but I'll be here for you through all of it. You just need to promise me that you're not doing it because you think you're not good enough for me already. And you also have to promise me that you're not going to go buying some shady instant cure potions from the first scumbag you see on TV! You can't trust any of 'em!"
(Thanks for considering me a Husk professional, by the way! I try my best! <3 In turn, thank you for your service with Angel Dust! I try my best by him but I'm always terrified I'll fuck it up... he deserves the best writing I can give him, but I know there's aspects of his life I'll never fully understand and I should be fucking grateful that I don't...)
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transmasc-rose · 1 day
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I like Rose, and I think they should have done more with the Bad Wolf event. So here's a small list of related AUs that have been rattling around in my head.
Feel free to use them for whatever, I'd love to see if you write something tho!
Becoming Bad Wolf, absorbing the Time Vortex and using its powers effects Rose beyond that one moment. Merely absorbing it long enough to expel the power was enough to cause Nine to regenerate, and Rose used its power for an extended period. Time travelling on its own is enough to change the body, the cells, the aging process. Being around enough Time Lords effects the aging process. So when you absorb the vortex into yourself, become it for an extended moment, make someone else immortal in a way no one else is, who's to say it doesn't effect you too? And when you leave with Tentoo, the human Doctor, the mortal Doctor, and you think--we're going to live together, we're going to die together. And the original Doctor thinks--this is for the best. I won't get more attached, I will lose her on my terms, they'll live what I can't have. But the Doctor ages. And Rose doesn't, whether she can regenerate, or lives in a single timeless body. Not like Jack, she can die, but her Doctor dies first. The Doctor lives the life of the Companion, and Rose lives the tragedy of the Doctor. There's no evidence of Time Lords in Pete's World. Rose and Tentoo have a child in the comics. Does her child die before her too, or does she inherit her "gift"? Does she find her way back home? Is she angry? Is she scared? Is she alone?
Or maybe she's still immortal, but she doesn't leave--either she makes it out of Doomsday in her home dimension, or she refuses to make a choice in Journey's End and insists the original Doctor keep her and Tentoo. What matters is, she's there when Ten regenerates into Eleven. She's there when the TARDIS malfunctions, and decides to crash. And through some happenstance, whether separation while the TARDIS was crashing, splitting up for one reason or another, Prisoner Zero plot devices, or simply breaking the age old rule of "don't wander off", they get separated. And the Doctor leaves for "five minutes". Rose returns to the TARDIS, or thinks she's found the TARDIS, and its not there. At best she sees it leave, or it leaves some signature behind she can track with a device from Pete's World. She knows it was there. So she waits, as Amy waits, because if a universe apart wasn't enough to break her spirit then time travel isn't either. Learns the year, gets a job, maybe goes and does her A levels like she said she wanted to do that one time. Years pass. Does she keep in touch with Amelia, the only lead she has to the Doctor? Rose says she doesn't really like children in Fear Her, but she's tolerated them before. Another strange figure in Amy's life. A connection to her "Raggedy Doctor". And almost as strange, too. Because as the years pass, the five between Doomsday and The Eleventh Hour, and the 12-14 years Amy waits, she doesn't age a day over 19/20. Did she ever get an explanation from the Doctor about Jack, in this vague extra time she's been with him? About how he left him without warning or explanation? Does Jack tell her? Does she worry he left her too? As the days pass, does she worry that he could sense what she was becoming, and abandoned her like he abandoned him? Or did she never know, not even have that context, left hoping that the doctor would one day come back until she has to accept that this time, this might be it. Left to deal with this curse on her own. She was worried Ten would leave her when he got that face. Maybe Eleven did. ...and of course, Eleven returns, none the wiser, and Rose's face only "confirms" he'd barely been gone at all! Nothing to worry about! Right?
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businessfish-art · 1 year
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From the Altar
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the-casbah-way · 24 days
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not to beat a dead horse but jesus christ can you just leave people alone in public bathrooms i just want to fucking piss girl i'm so tired of feeling anxious and trying to avoid using public bathrooms because of how fucking weird cis people are about it. i tried to go into the bathroom at work today (i have worked here for years) and this woman who has worked here for two weeks and doesn't know me laughed and tried to like. steer me in the direction of the men's toilet instead and was like "wrong way!" are you fucking kidding me fuck off
#i have worked in this building for years. i know where the fucking bathroom is#like i'm sorry but cis people just don't want me in any bathroom at this point. i can't fucking win#i'm not kidding you i didn't really think that people in real life would actually make a fuss over who is in the bathroom#but at uni specifically i have had A LOT of people in the womens bathroom awkwardly tell me “uh i think you're in the wrong bathroom haha”#they're not even doing it in an antagonistic way it's like they genuinely think i've walked into the wrong one#and it makes ME feel like a creep or like i've done something wrong#like you guys are the ones that insist i should be in this bathroom !!!! but then i go in there and get told i'm in the wrong one !!!!#it's one of the few things that never fails to make me feel anxious and sad because it's a fucking bathroom it shouldn't be a big deal#why am i being made to feel like i've done something wrong when i'm just trying to exist here like everyone else#and you know what. it doesn't matter how i identify right. because i've actually done nothing to intentionally masculanise my appearance#like the entire time i've been out. i had short hair before i came out and i dressed this way before i came out#i have not done anything to try and Look Like A Man or Look Cis. i just have masc bone structure NATURALLY#so for all you know i could just be a woman with short hair ????? and you're telling me i don't belong in here because of that ??#like sure i'm NOT a woman with short hair but my point is you literally cannot tell the difference#so just leave people alone
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lith-myathar · 6 months
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#really really hate how thoughtless and oblivious i can be to my own bad behavior#ill know something is important or that a shouldn't do a particular thing#but over time and assumptions and small acts of carelessnes shit just....fades and accumulates and one day#i look up and ive done something very stupid and hurt someone else#and i didn't feel it happening#my mind will take things and hide them from me is what it feels like. ill know they're there but it fades into the background noise#i am hard on the things in my life including people and relationships. and i am always so vulnerable to my own fuckin lmfao inattentivenes#this is why i struggle so much with the idea of ever having an intimate partner or children. it doesn't matter how much i care.#eventually and inevitably i do damage.#and i know consciously that people make mistakes and all you can do is try to course correct and make it right. but it's better#not to hurt anyone in the first place and i really don't know if i will ever be capable of that.#trying to convince myself this kind of shit is growing pains but man. man. i can't stop being what i am and it really#really feels sometimes like i am just destined to break and neglect#but then that ''im broken'' thing feels like trying to dodge around taking responsibility and improving. and i should be better than that.#but god how tf are you supposed to stop dissociating from the reality of what you're doing when you're. dissociated.#all i can ever think to do is isolate#*sigh* guys i think i might need to graduate to therapy with a trauma specialist#or adjust my medication. god. im so tired.#why is it so gd hard to be a normal decent person. it doesn't seem hard but then
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skrunksthatwunk · 7 days
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found out that rascal's owner took him again while i was out, and he's probably not gonna be back since the semester's almost over. i don't even know if his owner's coming back next semester, if i'll ever see him again. if he'll ever see me again. why do they wait until im not around to do this? why do they never let me say goodbye to him?
#i didnt really get to process it bc i found out when i was hanging w a friend but. im processing it now#sigh.. i dont know. i dont know.#at the end of the day he is and has always been someone else's cat. i can't control what she does with him#no matter what i think of it. she can always take him away. but every time it happens im just. im tired yknow?#it's worth it to me to have him around. i love him dearly and i want him to be in a home where he's actually cared for (which i have done my#best to provide) but he's just. not mine. and every time it happens i back up and think man. im such a sucker.#i don't think people manipulate me often. not in an ongoing way i mean. i don't think ppl see me as valuable enough to most of the time.#but damn. she really found my weak spots didn't she. free petcare courtesy of one chump who can't live without animals around. sigh#he deserves stability but he deserves love more. this weird shared custody thing is better for him i think. and frankly i also love him.#im not the priority here but my feelings are like. there. him being taken away without even telling me first hurts. i'd like to be able to#say goodbye to him. im not saying he has to stay or this has to go on but couldn't they just.. consider my feelings a bit more?#just bc you're fine with dropping your cat off somewhere for weeks not knowing when you'll see him again and not visiting doesn't mean i am#and i kind of feel like my roommate is part of this. after all it's not like his owner can just break into our room and take him#and if im always out when they do it there's a chance roomie's just shipping him off whenever she gets sick of him.#she's done it before. even after she agreed so vehemently with me about never wanting him to go back to such treatment and stuff early on.#she's been spraying him for little reason lately too. and i mean i get being a little more cautious with some things bc her neck's broken#but she's really fixated on how much he smells and bites and stuff and talks about how if i wasn't around she'd consider eating him#and then other times she's like that's my pookie. i don't get it. like yeah i tell rascal to fuck off sometimes bc he hurts me but it's not#like a hateful thing. i dont resent him for it i'm just annoyed sometimes bc he's maiming me a little. he's my baby. how could i loathe him?#so it makes me think that roomie might be blaming his transfers on his owner bc she doesn't want me to judge her#and like. this is her room too. it's not her fault she's more bothered by the smell than me. if she doesn't want to be bitten and clawed all#the time i can sympathize. i don't wanna force her to house him. but i wish she'd just be honest with me i guess#like. what if his owner decides to give him away without telling me? i'd take him in in a heartbeat. even though i know it's a bad idea.#but i'm worried he'll fall out of my reach completely. and at the very least I'd like to be able to say goodbye first. that's all.
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thebleedingeffect · 22 days
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#okay I'm talking in the tags of this post cause shit is happening in my life and I gotta talk about it somewhere#one part of it is my step brother crashing and burning before my very eyes and there's nothing I can do to stop his own destructive actions#so it's just me watching this poor kid ruin his relationships and blame everything and everyone around him as he does so#despite the fact that he's undeniably been treated horribly at times- he's just turned that anger back onto others and himself#and I have no idea what to feel as I watch him get arrested. have drug problems. because I'm just waiting for the inevitable spiral#it doesn't help that my mom has been comparing us and saying that I'm the much better child and she wishes he was like me#not understanding that I could’ve been him if I was just more angry at the world at that age instead of being so sad and scared#and that leads me to my fucking mom cause like- I love her. we've been through alot of bad shit with her#I've almost done some really bad shit for her and I know that she loves me more than anything else#but it feels like its been getting more and more suffocating cause I'm not sure she's able to start seeing me as an adult#and start loosening her grip around me and let me breathe. to have my own experiences without her by my side#to be able to go places and imagine a future without her constantly by my side#she talks and it's like she doesn't even think to wonder that perhaps I want to form my own experiences#and experience the world on my own terms because I feel like I've spent my whole life having so little damn control#religious family. shit and neglectful father who turned into the exact opposite and nearly killed me. family who refuses to listen and talk#having to move and run immediately. put survival above all else. go to school. get out. and god I just wanna breathe#she loves me so much and I love her too. but I feel like I'll be sooner crushed if I stick here for long enough#I'm just mad that my life has been nothing but absolutely no love. sudden waves of intense love. absolutely nothing. sudden spike#and I feel like I'm just finally starting to form good. healthy relationships on my own terms and actually make friends#because I had no idea what I was doing when I was a kid cause I was so fucking lonely and hurting#now I just. gotta figure out how to tell my mom that I can't carry this expectation that I'll continue to stay forever by her side#it just feels like I'm her child first and a person second. and it sucks. it really sucks.#ough. spins and spins and spins and spins-
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barbieaiden · 11 months
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i wasn't actually going to show more wip pics but i'm realising this is going to take forever so
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i haven't actually done anything with the page yet i've just done the renders but. i mean. look at them
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caffeinatedopossum · 1 year
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Events of last night:
Me: *crying*
My girlfriend: what's wrong?? :(
Me: *struggling to form words* intrusive thoughts are bad... I don't want to talk about them because then I'm scared that they're true and you might think I'm awful
My girlfriend: ah I actually get that. I have those a lot. It doesn't mean anything though, intrusive thoughts are just like dreams. Like the things you do in them aren't really things you want to do, it's just stuff your brain comes up with.
#we then very heavily related over having the same intrusive thoughts and now I'm suspicious#thinking about when i told her i might have ocd and she said i didnt#and starting to feel like thats because... what if we both have ocd#it seems like she was basing her entire knowledge of conditions on people shes known with those conditions. which makes sense#but the person/ people with ocd had severe cleaning compulsions and the like#where as me and her obsess much more over morality#like its very clear we think about it so much. and idk what to do with that information#we both feel like the intrusive thoughts and obsessive ruminating are the only things that keep is from being bad people#or that prevent us from being bad people i guess. idk why that wording is just slightly more accurate#like people who dont think about these things (apparently all 'normal' people since this could be *an actual disorder*)#they're not constantly analyzing. trying to be aware. asking themselves questions about their true nature. judging those answers#theyre not really doing that with other people either. of course i could be wrong since im very clearly not a normal person.#but this is what i mean! im speculating about other people and acknowledging the ways i could be wrong and just trying to figure it all out#but it seems like no one does that and it doesnt *make them* bad people. it just doesn't prevent them from that happening either#like theyre just as likely to hurt people as the 'bad' person thats thinking the same way they are#and i cant ever be comfortable with me living that reality even when *this reality* is a waking nightmare#sure im tearing my skin off (good ole skin picking disorder) when im thinking about these things. sure im crying. sure i can't sleep.#sure it makes me feel like im constantly a horrible person and need to attone for everything ive done and havent done#sure. but then i turn around and say its helping me. because why else would my brain torture me? isnt it always about protecting me?#i don't know. all i know is who i dont want to be and what i dont want. so that exactly what my brain convinces me is real#i guess what it kinda comes to do is#would you rather live a reality where everything around you is superficial. your thoughts behaviors and thoughts. your reactions#all of them are things youre never aware of. you could be hurting people or you could be helping themm#you could even be hurting yourself. but you would never know. its a comfortable reality that youre never really aware of#OR would you rather live a reality aware of all those things. seeking answers and sometimes finding them.#trying your hardest to help others and better yourself and fix the broken things in this world#your reality is one where you recognize every threat that no one else does and it kills you inside because they wont always listen#theyre comfortable and you're stuck in a reality where you try and try and try but even when you succeed#your brain forms its own reality. a metaphorical jail. where you never get to experience the reality you fought so hard for#instead you exist in this sort of purgatory where you live out your own worst fears and the worst ways you could have failed
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cinna-bunnie · 1 year
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bleh
#having a bad morning tbhhhh#i envy the ppl who grew up here :| it's so much easier to make friends when u went to school w ppl and grew up with them#i have been here since 2016 and was just trying to get stability the first 3 years financially/housing-wise.#and when i was Finally ready to start making friends the pandemic happened.#the closest thing I've had to friends were made thru my ex and when we broke up they ghosted me.#to this day i have not made a single genuine friend and i can't articulate how hurtful that is to think about.#and i get excited when i might have a new friend but do the audhd balancing act where i tone myself down so i don't scare them away#but then idk. maybe i just come off as uninteresting or indifferent. idk what the perception of me is bc no one ever tells me anything lol.#i just get ghosted a lot 😭 it's Literally so much easier to find ppl to fuck than it is to find friends. idk why this is so hard but it's#frustrating. everyone has lukewarm interest in me at best and i have so much to offer when I've opened up to someone.#and i can't rly talk w ppl about how I'm feeling. and i can't do anything but keep trying over and over or else i WILL fr have no friends.#it's just. like. I'm not a normal person w normal circumstances and interacting w people who already have a ton of friends and stuff#going on is hard. there's like this burning desire for companionship in u as the person NEEDING it that no one else has#bc they already have it yk? ur just kind of a footnote on everyone's day/week. u don't have that kind of relationship where#u can Just Go Over or just have ppl over. ppl can hang like once a month maybe. i hate it here but also don't want to leave :|#everything is great except trying to make friends. idk i just wanted to vent lol I'm done ranting and might just delete#but this feeling wells up inside me and some days is so hard to ignore 😭#'i have been here since 2016 and don't have a single genuine Friend' what the fuck 😭😭#ik that wfh doesn't Help but i wouldn't be able to get anything done in person in my position lol. plus it's less about where ppl are#and more about how relationships (dont) develop past a certain point.#i have someone I've been talking with probs longest out of everyone so far and we're gonna hang this weekend#but I'm also perpetually afraid I'm gonna scare them away or something and be back at square 1 😭#and idk im afraid that might translate into seeming shy or something and I'd hate for them to lose interest anyways ._.#but idk how much of that is valid vs my brain just being mean to me and paranoid over my other experiences.#anyways... yea thnx for reading if u did. i feel crazy 😮‍💨
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