#iq pearl
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Little Homeworld Life chapter 22: Seeing Black (originally posted on May 22, 2023)
AN: After almost a year of waiting, the Black Pearl Brigade have finally returned from their final battle with Cinnabar! It's been a while since I last wrote them, so bear with me as I try to get back into the swing of writing five or six characters who are almost the exact same. And in addition, we got another batch of new characters joining Black Rutile, one of whom we've already seen in De-Clustering during Tanzanite's flashback. The plot begins to thicken as we reach the epic climax of Little Homeworld Life.
Synopsis: The Black Pearl Brigade, now retired after defeating Cinnabar, decide to move to Earth. Meanwhile, Cinnabar is broken out of prison by another of Black Rutile's minions.
Cast:
Deedee Magno-Hall as The Black Pearl Brigade, Nacre, Pearl, Pearl Guards
Avi Roque as Cinnabar
Gina Torres as Andesine
Awkwafina as Kyanite
Allison Janney as Pyrite
Kimberly Brooks as Dalmatian Jasper
Zehra Fazal as Zoisite
Lena Hall as Bloodstone
Jodie Whittaker as Xenotime
Matthew Moy as Lars, Dante
Enuka Okuma as Rhodonite
Ashly Burch as Rutile Twins
Kathleen Fisher as Fluorite
Erica Luttrell as Padparadscha Sapphire
Estelle as Garnet
Michaela Dietz as Amethyst
Nancy Linari as Martha
Kate Miccuci as Sadie
Christine Baranski as Hessonite
Olivia Olson as Citrine
Kathleen Barr as Púrén
Noël Wells as Black Rutile
Della Saba as Aquamarine
Charlyne Yi as Eyeball
Larissa Gallagher as Bluebird Azurite
Shanelle Grey as Sally Grove
Zach Steele as Ronaldo
Uzo Aduba as Demantoid's Bismuths
Miriam Hyman as Demantoid's Bismuths
Shelby Rabara as Demantoid's Peridots
Featuring Barbara Dunkelman as Amber
And Kristen Schaal as Howlite
--
"Don't get too cocky, Andesine!" the red-clad captain of the Black Pearl Brigade yelled from her captain's chair at the other ship they were dogfighting with. "All systems, fire!"
"Will do, Cap!" Pony, the blue-dressed second in command of the Brigade, saluted before pointing the Servant's weapons at the ship. In the months since the fall of Black Rutile and Cinnabar, though the Black Pearls had planned on going wherever the winds took them, there were still members of the Rutile Rebels hiding across the universe that needed to be brought to justice. Andesine happened to be one of them. A former sergeant of Yellow Diamond feared far and wide for her sadism and patience, best demonstrated as Andesine heartlessly used her fleet as shields, the orange Gem dressed in samurai-like armor led an entire army of fellow Rutile Rebels in trying to conquer what territory had been lost by her master and comrades.
Along with Andesine were a long-haired orange Amber dressed in a tan jacket, brown zip-up overalls, and an orange scarf around her neck, and a Howlite with black veins spreading across her face wearing a turtle-necked sweater and a visor over her eyes.
"Lady Andesine, we seem to be evenly matched with these Pearls." Howlite cautioned her superior as Andesine's ship was at war with the Servant and the Sun Incinerator. "What do you suggest we do now?"
"I say we should keep firing, nerd!" Amber yelled at Howlite's face. "There's gotta be a weak point we can exploit or something!"
"Not everything can be solved with violence, you hotheaded clod!" Howlite argued with Amber. "Sometimes, we have to make a plan and wait for an opportunity!"
"Sometimes, plans don't always work out, and opportunities will fail too." Amber retorted. "Game, set, and match! Nailed it!"
"Can it, you fools!" Andesine commanded her two minions to cease their bickering. "While I agree with Amber that sometimes brute force can get good results, my current plan might be more Howlite's speed." This caused Howlite to stick her tongue out at Amber while Amber pulled down an eyelid. "What the Pearls don't realize is that I'm planning to break Cinnabar out of prison and bring her to Black Rutile, wherever she may be. My idea is to feign surrender so we can be taken to Revanche 666 and stage a breakout."
"That's a brilliant idea." Howlite agreed while side-eyeing Amber, who just rolled her eyes while folding her arms. "But how can we convince the Pearls that we surrender? Surely they'll get suspicious about what you have planned."
"Just follow my lead," Andesine answered before ordering her ships to stop firing and opening communications with the Black Pearl Brigade and the Off-Colors. "I'd like to arrange a formal meeting with the enemy fleet to reach a truce."
"What kind of truce?" Cap asked suspiciously.
"This better not be a trap, Andesine!" Lars shouted.
"No, there is no trap," Andesine promised while crossing her fingers behind her back, letting Amber and Howlite know she was telling a big, fat lie. "As of today, my associates and I peacefully surrender."
"Wait, already?!" Lars exclaimed. "We kinda thought that you'd resist just a little longer! What's with the sudden change in attitude?"
Andesine glanced at Amber, causing her to start speaking too. "Oh, well, uh," Amber stumbled over her words. "we just felt so tired by all the chasing and fighting and thought that it was time we tried changing ourselves for the better."
"That's right!" Howlite added just as shakily. "All this time, we were so lost and directionless; all this warfare just seemed so senseless!"
"I still do not trust them!" Braids, the Brigade's yellow-wearing strongman, said bluntly. "Bring them aboard our ship to see if they truly mean what they say!"
"Hey, you want a fight, Pearl?!" Amber yelled at Braids. "That's right, you and me! Right now! We're having it out! Come on, come on!"
"Everybody, calm down." Fluorite soothed the tensions between all three parties. "Now then, Andesine, are you really certain you surrender?"
"I am as certain as the universe is vast." Andesine replied before quickly flashing her two cohorts a smile. "Please bring us to Revanche 666 so we may consider what we've done."
"IQ, what can you make of this?" Braids asked IQ, the green-garbed intelligence officer of the team.
"Hm, I can indeed conclude they are suspicious." IQ nodded in response. "But if they want to surrender, that makes our jobs easier."
"Andesine is going to surrender, but she has something sinister planned!" Padparadscha Sapphire exclaimed.
"Ignore her," Andesine stated. "Please, take us away, for we are now the last of the Rutile Rebels yet to be arrested!"
"She's right, it's only this fleet left to go, and then we've caught them all!" Pony added. "In any case, you're all under arrest! Lay down your arms, and we'll take you in quietly!"
"At long last, we have them all." Tails, the pink-wearing sharpshooter, smiled in relief. "What a relief."
"Okay, you three, just stay right there while we take you to prison," Lars ordered the three Rutile Rebels as he ended communications with Andesine, who began grinning evilly as soon as their eyes were off her.
"Flawless victory." Andesine declared to Amber and Howlite. "Once we receive our sentence, we shall form a plan from there."
"I like the way you're thinking, boss!" Amber said, rubbing her nose with her thumb and smirking.
"You always were a very patient Gem who loved taking advantage of whatever situation you got in," Howlite added as Andesine's ship was seized by the Black Pearls and the Off-Colors, causing the three Gems to raise their hands in surrender. "I hope you know what you're doing here, Andesine."
"Trust me; I know exactly what I'm doing," Andesine assured with a smirk.
--
Soon, Andesine and her fleet were transported to Revanche 666 to be admitted into the prison and brought to their cells. By this point in time, the number of prisoners had slowly decreased as more and more of the Rutile Rebels were rehabilitated in confinement and allowed to rejoin society. However, Cinnabar and her cohorts were among the prisoners that refused to accept defeat no matter how much the Black Pearls, Peridots, and Bismuths tried to convince them to abandon their warmongering ways. Now, they were soon to be joined by Andesine, Amber, Howlite, and all the other Gems who pledged allegiance to the trio, just as Andesine had planned.
"Okay, all of you single file!" Lars commanded the Gems being shown to their cells. "Nobody makes a ruckus; this is a prison we're running here, not a fight club."
"Did they seriously turn our headquarters into a prison?!" Amber yelled in outrage.
"I recognize the irony as well, Amber," Howlite replied dourly.
"Well, I think that should be everyone," Rhodonite said happily. "At long last, the universe is free of the Rutile Rebels. That reminds me, how has Black Rutile been doing since she was exiled to Earth?"
"Probably off plotting her revenge or something; I don't care anymore," Lars replied. "I'm just glad we finally put these bigots down once and for all."
"LOOK WHO'S TALKING!" a fusion loyal to Andesine yelled from the line.
"Hey, what did I say about making a ruckus?!" Lars yelled back. "Anyways, what else should we do now that we finally have some free time?"
"Yes, I've been wondering that too." Nacre, the Brigade's latest recruit, and medic dressed in white and formerly known as Shell, stated. "In the time since I've gained a physical body, I don't think I've had enough time to think about how it feels. There is just so much about the universe that I want to learn more about!"
"Well, if that's the case, why don't we find somewhere to retire to?" Cap asked. "Any suggestions?"
"We could go back to Kyukanza." Braids suggested. "The atmosphere and scenery are positively glorious."
"Or we could go to East Walleef again." IQ added. "Surely, the townsfolk will welcome us after how we saved them from Mr. Manco."
"Hm, good choices, all of you." Cap nodded in recognition of her teammates' options. "However, my decision differs ever so slightly. From this day on, we shall become residents of Earth!"
"Oh, Earth!" Nacre exclaimed cheerfully. "I've only been there as an artificial intelligence, but to be there as a full Gem would be so exciting!"
"Huh, what a weird coincidence." Lars realized as his eyes widened. "I've actually been planning on visiting Earth sometime to catch up with everybody down there. Why don't we both go there?"
"That would be a good idea." Tails nodded in agreement. "We can make a day out of it, have a little fun, reconnect with old friends, and make a new home."
"Well, what are we waiting for?!" Pony exclaimed. "Let's get a move on already!"
--
As the Black Pearls and the Off-Colors boarded their ships and left Revanche 666 for Earth, Andesine was getting acquainted with her new living situation while being led to her cell. Around her, she could see Gems sitting in their small cells guarded by a destabilizing field. Dalmatian Jasper was bouncing a ball against the wall of her cell, Xenotime was facing the corner and didn't turn once, Pyrite had been tallying up how many days she spent in confinement, Kyanite shapeshifted her hand into a harmonica, Bloodstone paced around her cell no doubt coming up with new crackpot theories, and Zoisite laid on her bench to stare at the ceiling. And then there was Cinnabar. What Andesine thought was once a proud and confident leader worthy of being Black Rutile's apprentice now sat defeated in her cell, contemplating how her actions led to her downfall.
"We're sorry that we failed, my lord." Andesine said to the caged Cinnabar.
"Don't fret, Andesine." Cinnabar sighed in defeat. "I failed just as hard."
"Okay, this will be your home until you finally realize what you're missing here." A Black Pearl guard said as she guided Andesine to her cell and closed the destabilizing field behind her. "Don't think about trying to get out. These cells were made to poof anyone who tries to escape."
As soon as the guard left, Andesine heard a knock on the wall. Surprisingly, she had been placed right next to Cinnabar's cell. "So, how did you get here?" Cinnabar asked. "How badly did you lose?"
"We didn't lose; we surrendered," Andesine said, to the shock and horror of Cinnabar and her cohorts. "But that's what we want them to think. We feigned loss because we plan to break you out and return to Black Rutile on Earth." She revealed. "Hopefully, she'll welcome us back in spite of our past failures to conquer the universe in her name."
"Wait, you want to break out of here?!" Dalmatian Jasper yelled. "No Gem ever escapes from Revanche!" The ball she was throwing then hit her in the face.
"They got round-the-clock security, and the Pearls show no mercy to anyone trying to escape!" Zoisite added.
"This is basically a suicide mission!" Kyanite stated, taking a break from her harmonica playing to show her concern. "And I'm unsure if Black Rutile would ever want us back."
"Hold on, everyone, let's just hear her out." Pyrite calmed everybody down. "Now, why do you think you'll be able to break out?"
"Because I have a little thing called hope," Andesine assured. "Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies."
"Good to see you're so optimistic," Bloodstone said.
"Hope can be a far stronger tool than fear, you know," Howlite stated. "After all, fear is the mind-killer and the little-death that will bring total obliteration."
"Aw, but we just got here!" Amber complained. "I've been planning on stabbing someone with a shiv!"
"Just as long as that someone isn't me." Xenotime declared as she slowly turned her head from the corner of her cell.
"So what do you say, Cinnabar?" Andesine asked Cinnabar, who was now reinspired by her fellow rebel's words of wisdom as she knocked on the wall again.
"I'm in." Cinnabar declared eagerly.
--
Meanwhile, on Earth, the Pearls had touched down in Little Homeworld, ready to start new lives away from the menace of the Rutile Rebels. Upon landing outside its gates, the Pearls disembarked from their ship to tour the Gem town and were greeted by its inhabitants along the way. The sights around her utterly enamored Nacre, as she was only here as an AI before, but now she could live her life as a full Pearl.
"Oh, hello there, welcome to Little Homeworld." The Brigade could hear Pearl greet them before she realized who she was talking to. "Oh my, the Black Pearl Brigade, is that you? How have you been lately? And who's this new Pearl?"
"Oh, we have much to tell you about what we've done since we were last here." Cap laughed awkwardly. "First of all, this is Nacre." Nacre gave a polite shake of Pearl's hand. "You may know her better as Shell, but now she gained a physical body after saving us by restoring our memories after we were temporarily amnesiac thanks to Cinnabar."
"Wait, Shell? As in the Shell from the Reef?" Pearl asked just as Garnet and Amethyst joined her. "How did that happen?"
"Well, that is actually a long story." Nacre stated. "You see, it all started when the Pearls' ship crashed into the Reef during an adventure and-"
"Well, well, well." Black Rutile declared as she reunited with the Pearls. "Hello there, Brigade. Fancy seeing you back here. I see you've got a wardrobe change and a new recruit." She glanced at Nacre. "A little taller than the rest of you, I see."
"You must be Black Rutile." Nacre said. "I've heard about how cruel and selfish you were, but I never thought I'd see you in person someday."
"Those are all just facetious lies!" Black Rutile barked at Nacre. "Now then, Pearls, what brings you here?"
"We're actually planning on moving into Little Homeworld now that we've taken down all your followers." Cap announced to Black Rutile. "Andesine surrendered pretty easily, surprisingly enough, but we got a feeling she has something planned."
"That's Andesine for you, always planning ahead of everyone else." Black Rutile replied before looking to the Crystal Gems. "Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl, why don't you go and make the Pearls at home while I talk with them?"
"Fine, but don't do anything funny!" Amethyst agreed before walking away. "Hey, where do you think we should put it?"
"Guess we'll just have to pick a random spot." Garnet declared as the three Crystal Gems got further and further away, allowing Black Rutile to talk with her former foot soldiers in private.
"You remember what we agreed upon last time you visited Earth, correct?" Black Rutile asked menacingly, pulling out her bowie knife to prove her point. "Tell anyone about our little scuffle, and I'll make sure they pay the price."
"Yes, we still remember." Pony proclaimed. "But if you think you can control us again, we will have no choice but to expose you."
"Wait, what deal?" Nacre asked curiously. "I was on the Servant then, so I'm a little lost here." At the same time, the Servant began hovering above Little Homeworld as Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl piloted it to a good spot where they could make it into a new home for the Pearls.
"Basically, Black Rutile forced us never to tell anybody she was hiding in the woods." IQ recounted. "But I guess that doesn't work anymore since everybody knows you're here now."
"Oh, you think you're cute?!" Black Rutile snarled angrily.
"Please, we're adorable!" Braids confidently answered. "Jokes aside, this place is now under our protection! I do no doubt that you are plotting glorious revenge, and we shall not stand for it!"
"Well, go ahead, make my day." Black Rutile grinned. "If you feel like you are this town's protectors, then I dare one of you to hit me as hard as you can. Which one of you dares?" The Pearls all looked at each other awkwardly, taken aback by Black Rutile's sudden challenge. However, Nacre was quick to accept the offer.
"I'll do it!" Nacre eagerly cheered.
"Wow, you're quite enthusiastic for a piece of fresh meat." Black Rutile laughed. "Hit me with your best shot; fire away if you have to!" Unfortunately for Black Rutile, she only got a gentle tap on the chest. "You're joking, right?"
--
Back at Revanche 666, a great escape was soon to take place. Headed by Andesine and Cinnabar, the Rutile Rebels that were still imprisoned were plotting to break out of their confinement and escape to Earth, where Cinnabar had stated Black Rutile was currently located. After ripping off a part of the wall in her cell, Howlite tinkered with the wires to hack into the security systems and deactivate the destabilizing fields so they could exit their cells safely and find somewhere to hide from the guards.
"Okay, everybody, here is the plan." Andesine declared. "Once Cinnabar and I return to our cells, we'll act perfectly natural while the rest of you follow our orders." She then began putting the Gems into groups based on their assignments. "Howlite, you, Xenotime, and Bloodstone will take over the security systems and free everyone else from their cells. Amber, Dalmatian Jasper, and Zoisite will hold all personnel hostage. Finally, Kyanite and Pyrite will find us a ship to steal so we can be home free. Are we clear on this?"
"One question," Howlite said. "If our plan is found out, how shall we compensate for such an event?"
"It's quite simple," Andesine answered. "In case that happens, we shall take no survivors."
--
With that, the escape plan sprang into action. Almost immediately, DJ and Amber pretended to start a prison riot to get the guards' attention, their acting skills working flawlessly as Zoisite also pretended to try and break up the fight.
"I'm telling you, the Viltrumites stand no chance against the Chimera Sui Generis!" DJ argued with Amber. "Their superior strength and superhuman abilities make them unstoppable!"
"But a Chimera Sui Generis is far more durable than you realize!" Amber yelled back. "They can take a beating without breaking a sweat! And that's not even taking into account their squid forms!"
"Please, you two, stop fighting over such trivial things!" Zoisite begged the two fighting Gems as a group of Black Pearl and Bismuth guards arrived on the scene.
"Are we going to need to intervene here?" one of the Pearls asked threateningly while pointing her spear at DJ.
"Well, you just happened to show up at the right time." Dalmatian Jasper smirked as her gem conjured a hook to snag the Pearl by the neck. "Let's make one thing clear here, Pearl! I'm in charge of this joint now, and anyone who says otherwise will have to answer to my friends!" Zoisite followed up on her partner's threat by pulling out her naginata and taking out a Bismuth in one fell swoop. Meanwhile, Amber pulled out her weapon, a kusarigama, and used the chain to strange another Pearl to the point of poofing. "Do I make myself clear?"
"How did you even escape?!" the Pearl exclaimed in horror.
"Let's just say some friends of ours are smarter than you think." Dalmatian Jasper grinned.
--
"I think we're on the verge of a breakout here!" a Bismuth operating the security cameras exclaimed as she watched DJ and Amber fight the Pearls before she gave orders to the rest of the prison staff. "All units, mobilize to subdue the prisoners! I repeat, subdue the prisoners!"
"I don't believe that'll be necessary." Howlite said as she stood behind the Bismuth and struck her down with her baseball bat. "Bloodstone, Xenotime, you take out the rest of the guards! I'll shut down the rest of the cells!"
"Sounds like a plan," Xenotime answered robotically as she made time freeze around her, stopping the oncoming Bismuths in their tracks and poofing them all with ruthless precision and mechanical grace. As soon as time resumed, it was like Xenotime defeated them all in less than a second.
"Cheater." Bloodstone grimaced. "Didn't even let me get a hit in."
"Wibbly wobbly timey wimey powers, deal with it." Xenotime retorted smugly before turning to Howlite. "How is everything going?"
"I'm in!" Howlite declared as she shut down the entire defense grid and allowed every remaining prisoner to escape, causing mass chaos in Revanche 666 as far as the eye can see. "I love it when a plan comes together." However, while all the security cameras have been shut off by Howlite's hacking, at least one was left unnoticed by the three Gems. And it was still running.
--
Cinnabar and Andesine emerged from their cells to see the rioting Gems wreaking havoc and overwhelming the guards with their anger at being kept away for so long. The two grinned at each other, as it seemed their plan had gone off without a hitch.
"It's official; this prison is ours." Cinnabar proclaimed before a Peridot was dropped at their feet.
"Why are you doing this?" the Peridot yelled in terror. "How did you plan all this?!"
"It's a secret to everyone." Andesine winked at the Peridot before pulling a communicator from the gem on her chest. "Kyanite, how is finding a ship going?"
"Well, funny you should mention that because me and Pyrite just ran into a problem." Kyanite nervously said.
"Oh no." Cinnabar moaned. "What is it?"
--
"Hessonite just came and destroyed all the other ships," Kyanite said on the other end as she and Pyrite came face to face with Hessonite and Citrine. Every other ship in the prison had been destroyed, leaving Hessonite's warship the only one left, and Kyanite & Pyrite were currently at the end of the line.
"We've been watching this prison for quite some time in the event something like this happens." Hessonite declared while presenting her sword.
"But how did you know?!" Kyanite yelled.
"That Howlite forgot to shut off a camera that was running on backup power," Citrine answered as she grabbed a defenseless Kyanite and Pyrite.
"What?! How was I supposed to know?!" Cinnabar screamed as the communicator was snatched from Kyanite's hand and crushed to bits.
--
"HOWLITE!" Andesine screamed for her chief scientist to meet her. "Why didn't you tell us that there was backup power here?"
"Well, because I wanted us to fail, and I was a mole for the Crystal Gems this whole time." Howlite smiled before she screamed, "OBVIOUSLY, I DIDN'T KNOW!"
"No matter, it's just Hessonite coming for us." Dalmatian Jasper stated as the other Rutile Rebels gathered around their two red-colored bosses. "We got a little thing called strength in numbers."
"Well, we're going to need a lot of that strength to complete the mission." Cinnabar stated as Hessonite and Citrine marched into the central area of the prison before they tossed Kyanite and Pyrite to her feet. "Pitiful."
"So this is what Andesine meant when she said she surrendered." Citrine observed the prison riot. "I should've known she was planning to break all of you out."
"And we won't let you tell anyone about it." Andesine said while drawing her flaming sword from her gem and motioning for her followers to attack. "CHARGE!"
--
"And that's how we narrowly escaped the Trandoshans." Lars recounted a tale of his adventures to his parents, the Crystal Gems, and his friends at a welcome-back barbecue held at his old home. "Moral of the story is don't get in the way of their hunts. They'll make sure you pay the price."
"Sounds like you've had quite the adventures since you were last here," Garnet said. "though I'm sure ours might be some good competition."
"Yeah, we had a shipping war, a beach party, a spy adventure, a krav maga tournament, a talent show, became celebrities! We even met ourselves from another dimension!" Amethyst eagerly added. "You would not believe all the crazy stuff we've been through!"
"Those do sound pretty exciting," Fluorite answered slowly. "I wish we had been there to experience all of that."
"Yeah, sounds like Earth just got a little more exciting." Lars's mother agreed. "Are you still sure you want to keep doing your space adventures, Lars?"
"I'm sure, Mom." Lars answered. "Besides, now that I'm pretty much immortal, I'm probably going to outlive pretty much everyone here, and I don't think I ever want to experience that."
"Well, you do you, Lars." Sadie accepted. "But if you ever feel like stopping by again, my mom and I always have a room to spare."
"Thanks, Sadie." Lars smiled at his old co-worker. "Sure, I've had fun traveling the stars with the Off-Colors, but it wasn't without some problems. Like these snake people I've had a few close calls with."
"Wait a second, did you say snake people?!" Ronaldo yelled as he slammed his hands on the picnic table. "I knew it; I knew they were real!"
"Never a dull moment with you, Ronaldo." Dante shook his head in amusement while everyone else just gave him weird looks.
--
Back at Little Homeworld, Nacre was taking in the sights and sounds of Earth. Such a wonderful planet to be on, she thought while exploring Little Homeworld and greeting all the Gems she passed by. She hadn't felt this amazing since she used her powers to restore her creations to normal and gain her physical body to join them in saving Homeworld. But now, after spending so much time in the cold darkness of space, she yearned for a change of scenery. Sure, the Pearls visited many planets in their travels, but they only stayed for a short time due to their missions.
As Nacre sat down on a bench and serenely felt the air comb her body, she suddenly heard a faint voice talking. "-was able to get through to that Reginald Johnson fellow you've informed me about." The voice said. "He was a prejudiced psycho who uses his media influence to spread his garbage takes, but he's also pretty agreeable."
"Who said that?" Nacre muttered as she turned around to discover a nearby house resembling Black Rutile's old headquarters. Tiptoeing closer to the home, Nacre spied on Black Rutile through the window and saw her conversing on a computer with a blonde human in glasses.
"Excellent work Sally!" Black Rutile thanked her human associate. "Talking to him should be very entertaining."
"I could feel my brain shrinking with every word he said." Sally Grove groaned in annoyance. "This is why I never trusted men; they're all the same dumbasses who not only do not realize how much is handed to them but still think they're the victims when they mess everything up because of their lazy entitlement and fragile egos."
"Yeah yeah, I've heard it a thousand times from your videos." Black Rutile declared before she realized she was being watched. "Hang on a second; I need to take this. See you soon." She shut off the video and marched towards the window to find Nacre trying to hide from her. "I know you're out there, Pearl."
"How did you find me?!" Nacre shouted as she tried desperately to hide, even though it was hopeless.
"Word of advice, little one, I am far smarter than you realize." Black Rutile smirked back. "TOPAZ!" On cue, Topaz appeared to snatch Nacre by the waist with her massive hands. "Return this Pearl to her friends at once."
"Yes, my Rutile." Topaz nodded obediently before looking down at Nacre. "No hard feelings, okay?"
"Let me go!" Nacre yelled as she tried to wriggle free from Topaz's grip while being carried away, leaving Black Rutile alone with her thoughts.
"Should've known someone was onto me." Black Rutile shook her head disdainfully before going back inside.
--
The Pearls were now getting themselves situated at their ship-turned-Earth home. Cap was modifying all the rooms to be homier, Pony had laid out a carpet in the bridge, IQ was helping Braids move a couch into the ship, and Tails was moving some decorations around. "Nice choice of carpet there." Tails commented on the ornate Persian carpet with gold tassels, a blue outer section, and a purple inner section with red and gold patterns throughout. "Really ties the room together."
Just then, there was a knock at the door. "Ooh, I wasn't expecting company so soon!" Pony exclaimed cheerfully as she walked up to answer it. "Sorry, we'll throw a housewarming party lat-" She then realized that Nacre was being delivered to the Pearls by Topaz, who had a message for the five.
"Black Rutile wants you to know that she doesn't want anyone interfering with her plans," Topaz said glumly. "Otherwise, and I hate to say this, but there will be consequences." She then tossed Nacre into the ship before walking away.
"Nacre, what happened?!" Braids exclaimed while dropping the couch on IQ's foot and racing to check on the team's healer.
"I was simply enjoying being on Earth when I overheard Black Rutile talking with this wicked human on the computer," Nacre explained what she went through. "Or at least, I think that's what she felt like. She said such awful things about other humans, and it made me suspicious. I think Black Rutile might be plotting her revenge or something."
"Well, if that's the case, someone has to know," IQ said as she shapeshifted her foot away from the couch. "Púrén?"
"Yes, IQ?" the Servant's primary AI, Púrén, asked.
"Signal the Crystal Gems; we must tell them what's up." IQ declared. "And I think it's time we tell them about where we found her."
--
As the Black Pearls left the Servant, Black Rutile had been watching them through one of her spy drones, and she was not happy at how they finally went back on her deal. "Alas, I can't seem to trust anyone on this planet." She shook her head in dismay before turning to Aquamarine and Eyeball. "You two, I have some disloyal Pearls that just moved here."
"What do you want us to do, my Rutile?" Eyeball asked.
"Fuse and terminate them." Black Rutile answered while making a slashing motion across her neck. "Are we clear?"
"Very clear." Aquamarine snickered before she and her Ruby sidekick joined hands and fused into Bluebird Azurite, who laughed maniacally before flying away.
--
Later that day, as the barbecue was winding down and everyone said their goodbyes, Lars heard something coming from the Sun Incinerator. Getting onboard the ship, he pushed a button on the console that showed him a staticky image of a fearful Hessonite. Lars had never seen Hessonite so timorous before. "Uh, is something wrong, Hessonite?"
"Lars, help!" Hessonite cried, but her message was too garbled for the pink human to get the whole message. "-evan-666-Cinna-Andesi-break-Citrine-ship, save us! Plea-" The message abruptly ended, leaving Lars wondering what she meant.
--
"This is where scum like you belong!" Dalmatian Jasper growled as she tossed a freshly poofed Hessonite and Citrine into the same cell and shut it behind them. "And lucky us, you gave us a ship to use, too, since you destroyed all of them."
The rioting began quieting as the Rutile Rebels began boarding Hessonite's warship to escape Revanche 666 and search for Earth. "Well, this plan has surely been more successful than I thought." Andesine commented while leading the Gems in hijacking the ship. "I was expecting at least one of our minions to give their lives for the good of our cause."
"That's not very comforting." Howlite said calmly.
"I was hoping to see you be used as a meat shield," Amber smirked.
"Don't you start, Amber!" Howlite yelled at Amber before Andesine broke them up.
"Enough bickering; we have work to do." Andesine proclaimed. "Cinnabar, I hope you have a good excuse for when Black Rutile sees you."
"I understand, Andesine." Cinnabar muttered in acceptance of her possible terrible fate. "Whatever Black Rutile must do, I shall accept."
"Yeesh, real bring-down prison has turned her into." Zoisite snarked while walking alongside Dalmatian Jasper.
"At least she's less nihilistic than Xenotime," DJ added, much to Xenotime's anger.
"You make a few overdramatic declarations, and suddenly you're the emo of the group!" Xenotime complained just as Hessonite and Citrine reformed in their cell to see everyone leaving. "Hey, look, they're back!"
"You see what happens when you put too much faith in Steven?" Cinnabar smirked cruelly at the two vigilantes. "This is where it'll get you."
"You won't get away with this!" Hessonite cursed Cinnabar as she and Andesine left with the other Rutile Rebels. "Don't think you can just take my ship and leave!"
"Uh, Hessonite, you kinda forgot one thing," Citrine stated. "Yours is the only ship left here since you destroyed all the others to try and keep them from escaping. Not a great plan."
"Well, looks like we're stuck here," Hessonite replied, realizing her own recklessness at the worst moment. With her ship now in Andesine and Cinnabar's hands, Hessonite was stranded on Revanche 666 with no known way of getting help.
--
Back on Earth, the Pearls were informing the Crystal Gems at the temple of Black Rutile's plans and how she threatened them. Outside, however, Bluebird Azurite was hiding from sight with her ice saber at the ready. "At long last, a chance to finally kill two birds with one stone." She laughed deviously as the cutlass lit on fire. "Or, in this case, one sword."
"I don't think so!" Lars cried as he grabbed Bluebird from behind and suplexed her onto the deck. "The Pearls told me everything, and I have something to tell you." He added while picking up Bluebird by her wing. "Run. Run away, Bluebird, back to your master. And tell her that no matter what she has planned, the Crystal Gems will be coming for her soon."
--
"And you just ran away?!" Black Rutile began yelling in Bluebird's face when the fusion returned to give her the bad news. "Whatever, they know what I'm doing! But they still don't realize what I'll do to get there."
"I deeply apologize, my Rutile." Bluebird apologized to Black Rutile just as they heard a loud rumbling sound from outside. "Is it just me, or are there tons of things just coming from the sky lately?"
"One second." Black Rutile said while pulling up her visor to check her surroundings, in which she discovered Hessonite's warship hovering over the forest where Jasper once made her home. "Hessonite? What's she doing here?"
"I don't think that's Hessonite, my Rutile." Bluebird observed. "Otherwise, she'd be landing somewhere to meet the Crystal Gems, not out in the woods. Someone must've taken the ship from her."
"Well, let's not dawdle for so long! Let's get moving!" Black Rutile said as she grabbed onto Bluebird, and the two flew towards the forest, where they found Hessonite's ship waiting for them. When the pair landed, a large reverse pyramid detached from the ship and descended on top of Jasper's old cave, destroying it and allowing Andesine, Howlite, Amber, and Cinnabar's cabal to disembark.
"Black Rutile, we have brought you Cinnabar." Andesine declared and shoved Cinnabar forward to meet her old master for the first time in months. "Do with her as you may."
"Hello again, Cinnabar." Black Rutile ominously greeted her former apprentice. "I've been told what happened when you went against those Pearls. And now, thanks to you, they are living here on Earth. What do you have to say for yourself?"
"I'm sorry for everything Black Rutile, those Pearls had me outfoxed at every turn!" Cinnabar begged for forgiveness while dropping to her knees. "I accept any punishment you shall give me!"
Instead of punishing her, however, Black Rutile picked Cinnabar up by the collar of her jacket and gave her a tender pat on the head. "No need to cry, my friend." She said sympathetically. "It's not entirely your fault because your failures can all be traced to one source."
"Do I even need to ask?" Andesine asked.
"Yes, Steven." Black Rutile proclaimed. "Everything the Pearls did was in service of that little tyrant's corrupted paradise! But slowly but surely, I have been taking control of the creatures he loves most: humans. Now then, let me ask you one thing. People talk loud when they want to sound smart, right?"
"CORRECT!" Bloodstone yelled loudly as a demonstration of Black Rutile's point.
"Well, that is what I've discovered recently." Black Rutile continued. "My ventures through the Internet have allowed me to discover that there are tons of people out there who, no matter how poor their moral character is, everyone will believe whatever they say. And naturally, I have taken advantage of this."
"So what are you saying?" Cinnabar asked nervously.
"I'm saying my new plan is more personal than ever before." Black Rutile responded. "Now then, are you all with me?" The rebellious Gems said nothing, only getting on one knee and bowing in reverence of their genius leader. "That's just what I needed to hear." She declared evilly as the Rutile Rebels began coming back together under her banner.
--
Only four chapters left until the finale, and we seem to be getting into the real good stuff. Andesine, Amber and Howlite, my resident Captain Kirk, Dr. McCoy and Mr. Spock for this chapter, were based off an idea for a story by a reviewer that I'm sad to say doesn't fit into my current plans, but I was more than happy to insert these characters into this world and fitting them into the Rutile Rebels. In the meantime, we'll have two more slice of life episodes to get down before we move onto the big two-part finale I estimate will be sometime in late June. Keep watching the skies everyone, and see you real soon.
#steven universe#steven universe alternate future#fanfiction#little homeworld life#cap pearl#pony pearl#iq pearl#braids pearl#tails pearl#nacre pearl#cinnabar#kyanite#pyrite#dalmatian jasper#zoisite#bloodstone#xenotime#andesine#amber#howlite
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Day 526
yup its HC x FMA AU again haha last one for now i just wanted to flesh out the main cast of the au here
Major Grian, the Windstorm alchemist, is Pearl's brother. He is also Pearl's subordinate, which she finds hilarious and he finds not as hilarious. The two do often spar with each other and also get into trouble together as though Grian is more subject to performing all kinds of antics, Pearl is his primary enabler (as long as Grian does the paperwork afterwards)
#daily pearl doodles#pearlescentmoon#grian#hermitcraft#fullmetal alchemist#mod morph#their iq goes to room temperature when theyre together#siblings :P#also grian commits human transmuation in this au#he loses his arms#pesrl doesnt know this until hes transfered to central#grians primary skillset is wind and weather#air molecules#all that jazz#uh yeah so he also does electricity stuff sometimes#though he has to have rubber gloves first or he'll shock himself
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ흔들리지 않고 피어난 ♡
#케이팝 무드보드 ♡#아이린 귀엽다 (≧∇≦)/#한국어 ☆٭* ≛#cute moodboard#aeshetic moodboard#alternative moodboard#iq moodboard#jennie#calvin klein#jennie moodboard#green moodboard#apples#apple moodboard#white moodboard#clean moodboard#에셰틱 ✿ ⊹♱#y2k moodboard#pearl mood board
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all of these people saying “connor’s wedding” is the best episode of television ever written... ok clearly you havent watched Malcolm in the Middle season six, episode 4 “Pearl Harbor”
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Some nicknames your future spouse may call you by
How to choose a pile?
Close your eyes and take a deep breath and ask the angels to show you the right pile for you and open your eyes. The first pile that catches your attention is the right pile for you.
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Guess who's back with another Post 😈😈
Pile 1
"Sweetheart" , "Sweety Pie" , "Lovely", "Honey" "Dazzle" "Charm" "Cupcake" "Blossom" "Starlight" "Queen bee" "Enchantress" "Darling" "Angel" "Princess" "Love" "Beautiful" "Sunshine" "Gorgeous" "Treasure" "Sparkle" "Adore", "pearl" ,"Serenity" "Gem" "my wife", "Butterfly" "Cuddlebug" "Precious", "Moonbeam", "Wonder" "Beloved"
These are some of the nicknames that I was able to pick up on. I also see that they won't be a particular nickname for you because we will call you by every nickname they can imagine. I am getting really romantic energy from your future spouse. They seem to be deeply in love with you. I also see that your relationship with them is going to be really stable and there won't be any room for second guessing and misunderstanding.
Pile 2
"goofball" , "mine" , "my tornado" , "ocean" , "Thunderstorm" , "Ride or die" , "the love of my life" , "daymaker" , "cuddlemaster" , "baby momma" , "sugar" , "luvbug" , "Not fast but always furious" , "my chatterbox" , "my destiny" , "Dinosour" , "Pikachu" , "Yoda" , "nugget", "mommy shark" , "Aphrodite" , "sleeping beauty" , "Elsa" ( because you may have cold hands?)
I see that the majority of you guys may be short? Or you'll be much shorter than them. I also see that your relationship maybe a bit more chaotic but in a funny way. I'm talking about the pranks and fun times you guys will have with your future spouse. You guys may like to pull each other's leg and be weird together. I'm also getting the message that they may be someone you never thought you would want to date? Like someone really unexpected. They may not be your ideal type but this relationship is really spontaneous and fun.
Pile 3
"Brainiac" , "babe" , "Smarty Pants", "Genius" , "8th Wonder of the world" , "Beauty", "Einsteinette" , "Cookie" , "Princess" "Savvy" , "star" , "Night Owl" , "Cutie patootie" , "Mensa Marvel", "Spark" , "Sweetcheeks" , "Belle", "Sage" , "IQ Angel" , "Bright Eyes" , "Darling" , "Astute Angel" , "Treasure" ,"Soulmate" , "my moon" , "my sanctuary" , "my universe", "loli" , "chiku?" , "bunny"
Your future spouse will respect you a lot and your relationship is really mature. I see them literally worshiping the ground you walk on. They will put you on a pedestal. "Respect" , "maturity" and "understanding" are the words that describe your relationship. I also see that you may already know who this person is going to be because I see that you're really intuitive yourself or you may have a dream or two about them. But whenever you meet them you're going to know that this is your future spouse.
#tarot reading#tarot cards#pick a card#free readings#free tarot#tarot#pick a pile#tarotblr#pick a picture#pick a photo#pick a card tarot#tarotwithavi#tarot witch#tarotcommunity#tarot blog#tarot wisdom#future spouse reading#future spouse#love reading
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Shiver’s search history leaked
Marina off the hook full name
Why is Marina Ida gullible
Why is Marina Ida so attached to Pearl
Marina Ida Octarian army
Marina Ida IQ
Marina Ida war crimes
Marina Ida osha violations shifty station
Why do my fans have the weirdest nicknames?
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Does it ever make you ever feel depressed that men have more variation in IQ? That means even though there will always be more male idiots, there will also be more male geniuses. So women can excel in any field, but a man will almost always be the "best" in it. It just makes me feel inferior every time I think about it, way more than strength difference does. Not only that, but they also have higher variation in all types of brain structure. That would mean men are naturally more diverse, personality-wise.
Sometimes I get into these negative thought processes about stupid shit and it totally consumes me. This is my latest one... Please help
Hmm.
Well firstly, IQ is a completely fake concept designed specifically for eugenicist purposes. You can train for an IQ test, your score can change depending on the day, and your score doesn’t mean anything apart from how good you are at IQ tests. It’s not a measure of intelligence, and ‘intelligence’ isn’t real anyway - as in, there is no such quality of uniform intelligence. I think it stands to reason that the highest IQ scores will be from men, because the tests are constructed around a fundamentally male world-view and value system as well as a white one. And that is what depresses me more - that ‘intelligence’ is viewed as some innate quality that only oppressors can possess so they can prove that they deserve their place in a meritocracy. It’s like that controversy about men winning more at Jeopardy than women - the world is structured around male interests and values, so men achieve in mainstream contests and use that to retroactively justify the legitimacy of those values and interests in the culture.
I’m less interested in the concept of a man beating a woman at certain activities because of him being smarter than her, than I am about him beating her because he's socialised from a young age into enjoying and valuing those activities - but also often regardless of his actual performance, he's also by default assumed to be better and more competent than her purely because he's a man. Take for example that study where when they did blind auditions for orchestras, men still got in more than women, but when they put carpeting down so women's heels couldn't be heard, there was finally a more equal ratio of women getting in. Or those studies where identical CVs given out and names that are typical of women, black people etc. get seen as less competent than those with male and white names.
We don't live in a world where we can objectively measure men's 'natural' abilities at anything psychological. But we do live in a world where we know that women's skills are massively undervalued - women have all sorts of intelligences that make the world run round; we're excellent negotiators, we're less violent, we're great at remembering, we have greater compassion, we make good leaders, we are more responsible, we have greater tact, we are safer in the workplace, we're more conscious of social issues and the environment, etc. etc. And none of what we have is seen as 'intelligence'; in fact, quite the opposite - many of our intelligences are dismissed outright as sentimentality and pearl-clutching.
Once again, though, I don't believe these traits are uniform across all women, or that they're 'natural' to us, just as men's traits aren't 'natural' to them. In the nature-nurture debate, there are too many factors in nurture that can't be realistically measured - and I have a suspicion that for many, feminists included, simply saying that men and women naturally possess certain traits is an easier narrative to swallow, because for many women the fear exists that if men can be socialised to be better, then dismissing them as evil would be morally wrong. But I don't think people need to be intrinsically, ontologically evil for us to dismiss them as oppressors - I simply judge by behaviour, which is more measurable.
Going back to intelligence, I think it's also worth saying here that women are socialised into not recognised or appreciating our skills, and to partake in behaviours that psychologically hobble us. Take for example in that orchestra study - under a feminist lens, wearing heels is a form of hobbling that's both literal and psychological. The woman is performing a feminine ritual, wearing a physically debilitating item that submissively marks her as a woman. Not to say that she would be respected more if she was gnc, but I find it interesting how women accidentally lost their spot on the orchestra in the study because their performative clothing made them noisier and easier to recognise as women. And on top of that, we have stereotype threat - there was a study done where men and women were performing some sort of test, and in one half they were in normal clothes, and the second they were in swimwear. In the second one, women performed more poorly than they did in the first, and men saw no change. Once again, we have two inexorably interlinked factors at play, here - women's swimwear is not built for utility but rather to be sexy, and women's bodies are considered inherently sexual; that's not to say that if women were wearing men's swimwear they'd do better at the test, but rather women are socialised to be self-conscious of themselves but also expected to show more skin - we're expected to dumb ourselves down in the name of being sexy.
The upside in all of this is that the moment you recognise that these things aren't set in stone, and rather that these are all skills you can develop if you gain confidence in yourself, you develop a robust sense of self that you can be comfortable and happy with regardless of external measure of male-approved success. I, for example, found confidence in myself and my writing, and now I'm finding success and getting praise online by women on tumblr. It seems you're best finding yourself environments surrounded by other women, especially feminist-minded women who are consciously choosing to fight against established biases by valuing the skills of women that are undervalued by society. Devaluing male interests and achievements in your own head is something you can also do, and I once again recommend feminist spaces as an excellent opportunity to de-program (obligatory plug for my side blog @learningwomanhood where I do exactly that).
For me, the biggest wisdom to be gained from feminism is the psychological distancing yourself from male thought - the more things you reject that you once unthinkingly believed to be normal, the more you feel that you can truly be human, vibrant, unconstrained; and the more silly the whole enterprise of patriarchy looks. It's not nice that rejecting patriarchy means rejecting mainstream society, but the older you get the more you realise that you simply can't dwell on these things and instead have to do what benefits you within it; nobody is owed a perfect existence, and once you realise that you have to choose a life for yourself and choose to be happy with that, your life will be much more comfortable. In the end, life is all about the gestures of love you make to yourself and others. When you realise that it's your job to be your own best friend, you can carry that energy with you your whole life; you will be inpenetrable because all that matters to you, no matter what situation you're going through or what hell you're in, is that you made decisions that showed love to yourself. That could be considered a form of intelligence - perhaps wisdom itself is a form of intelligence that is devalued specifically because it's female-coded. But wisdom sounds like nothing until you internalise it - all the language in the world can't seem to really get to its essence until something inside you clicks and you understand it.
One thing I would like to say is that those negative thought processes you have are not stupid: they are a valuable part of your processing of the world and are worth attention. We have this cultural idea that with regards to mental health, the parts of us that are 'real' and 'valid' and 'truly us' are all the good parts, and the negative thought processes and patterns of behaviour are like cancerous tumours that need to be artifically removed. One of the best things I ever did for myself is to take myself seriously - because that's my prerogative, as myself and my own best friend. The only thing 'bad' thing about those thought processes is that they cause you distress; that's it. So, then, it's up to you to decide how much you want to indulge in them. I find the best way to really tackle unpleasant behavioural patterns is to simply do them shamelessly, because clearly a part of you wants to do them anyway; one of the first ways I got out of my depressive spirals was to decide that I was going to do all the depressive actions (stay in bed, eat junk food etc.) but simply embrace that those are things I want to do and not feel guilty or sad about it. That way, the depression hasn't consumed me and instead I have made a choice - I have reformed my relationship with myself as an active agent and a made a choice to show love for myself through the gesture of taking my desires seriously, not dismissing them as 'mentally ill'. I could go on but the point is that all of your head is necessarily you - as in, it doesn't come from anywhere else but you, and therefore all of it should be respected and valued. Mainstream society won't tell you that - there's always supposed to be a limit, there's always something that's 'unhealthy' in some sort of metaphysical sense, there's always a part of you that's supposed to be beholden to some external standard, that keeps you feeling insecure and needing validation. But there is no true objective measure of a healthy mind; the only thing that matters is if you're comfortable with yourself, and you can always make gestures of love to yourself regardless of your situation.
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Nick Anderson
* * * *
SOTU DEBRIEF - DARK BRANDON BRINGS IT!
TCINLA
MAR 8, 2024
The Party of Class and Integrity celebrates another ass whipping - look at all those around the Dumbest Congressional Bimbo Ever as they realize how bad they got their asses kicked
Last night’s State of the Union was a punch in the face not only of the heckling MAGAT Morons, but the Otherwise-Unemployables of the DC Press Corpse. As well, the Democrat’s Professional Pearl Clutcher’s Caucus can join the others in officially retiring “He’s too old” once and for damn all. The Press Corpse stands today beside their MAGAt buddies, trying not to admit to the exact nature of the material covering their faces.
Over.
Done.
Finished.
The official Democratic response to this collection of clucks from now to November is, “You saw that State of the Union speech. Joe Biden is sharper than Donald Trump will ever be and is ready for the fight.”
You can tell November’s Losers saw their coming loss clearly when their majority criticism of President Biden was “He was too mean and talked too fast!” You know he left a mark. That was the most perfectly tuned-in SOTU speech I have ever seen, delivered with fire and energy by a man as far from the Press Corpse’s concept of a doddering old man, diminished in drive and energy as possible. The New York Times Opinion Section got hit in the face by a freight train of ideas and energy.
Joe was Old Man Strong. Dark Brandon. Killer Joe.
Biden delivered.
It was the best center-left populist presidential speech ever. Less technocratic than Obama; less curated than Clinton - a solid knock-it-over-the-outfield-fence.
As many Republicans feared, Biden was more than able to “spar with the disruptors,” as one observer reported, using their jeers to make his own policy points. (“Sparring with MAGAts” is also known as “shooting fish in a barrel”). It’s hard to believe the GOP could be so stupid with their heckling that they walked straight in to a second SOTU trap, that went off when Biden maneuvered them perfectly into taking their proposed $2 trillion dollar tax cut off the table. But then again, they are Republicans, and it’s well-known you have to score an IQ lower than ambient room temperature to get your party card there nowadays.
Biden’s speech was combative and sharp, the solid punch in MAGA’s face they’ve been asking for every day for so long. The “senile” narrative went flying into the dumpster fire. Once again, Republicans set the bar too low, and got knocked on their collective fat ass.
Joe argued forcefully from the strong side about America’s destiny, security, and purpose, laying down a fierce bright line against Putin and the forces of autocracy.
He more than made it through the SOTU address. That moment his supporters always fear never came. Politico, demonstrating that most real political knowledge is 20/20 hindsight, called the speech the “turn-the-tables SOTU.” They go on to report that the Biden campaign had their best two hours of fundraising so far in this cycle from 9 to 11 p.m. last night. A CNN flash poll finds that 62 percent of viewers thought the policies Biden laid out would move the country in the right direction.
The New Republic’s Osita Nwanevu wrote: “That overall impression—of a vigorous president, strong enough to take the fight to his detractors —will linger more deeply in the minds of most who watched than the substance of anything he said.”
But what was really interesting to me was watching the political midget behind Biden’s left shoulder. Mike Johnson’s histrionic facial expressions demonstrated everything wrong, idiotic, dangerous and treasonous about MAGA Republicans.
Johnson was both ridiculous and politically smaller than he actually is. He did applaud Biden’s call for aid to Ukraine early in the speech, which he does seem to support personally, even though doing so demonstrated how he’s too afraid of his crazy caucus to allow a straight-up vote. He is likely to go down in history as the one person who more than any other handed Ukraine to Vladimir Putin.
His mugging for the camera was more obviously overdone than what passed for “emoting” in silent movies. He nodded that solemn “more in anger than in sorrow” nod. He rolled his eyes more than a teenage girl listening to her elders.
What was really sad was noting what he rolled his eyes at! The most important was January 6 (of which he is a noted participant in the attempted coup). When Biden said: “We must be honest. The threat to democracy must be defended. My predecessor and some of you here seek to bury the truth about Jan. 6. I will not do that.” MAGAMike gave his most sustained eye roll. Close runner-ups were his responses to abortion rights and freedom, and the border bill that he killed when told to by Dear Leader. And he did that last one while Senator James Lankford - the chief GOP negotiator on the bill - listened to Biden lay out its provisions and nodded on camera, clearly mouthing “That’s true.” Mikey even shook his head at “buy American”!
His eye roll over “The very idea of America is that we are all created equal, deserve to be treated equally throughout our lives. We’ve never fully lived up to that idea, but we’ve never walked away from it either,” was the real demonstration of just how dangerous he really is.
The MAGA Republican Party doesn’t believe we’re all equal. MAGA, and MAGA Mike, knows that if you’re not a right-wing Christian, you are not a good American.
Of course, there was also Marjorie Traitor Goon, whose ridiculous getup and MAGA hat elicited a “WTF?” look from Biden when he first saw her - and which was in apparent violation of House rules (but then, she IS a violation of House rules). Lindsey Graham’s pasted-on embarrassed smile at least demonstrates he has more self-awareness than his fellow MAGA cockroaches, as he considers how far he has fallen. Watching the MAGA screamer in the gallery get arrested was nice. It came down to just how dumbstruck the Republicans were as this man who - according to the Volkischer Beobachter, er, I mean Faux Snooze - can’t remember his own middle name or string two sentences together, zingered them repeatedly as he publicly exposed their un-American extremism.
Overall, Biden’s speech showed how he can win, and how MAGA, being on the wrong side of history, will lose.
And then, savoing the speech, just when I had forgotten there was going to be an Official Response, there was “America’s Mom,” sitting on a stool in her kitchen, there in East Buttfuck, Alabam-bam. Katie Britt had the most scenery-chewing response to a SOTU speech I’ve ever seen, and given that her competition was the ever-thirsty Marco Rubio and the ever-hapless Bobby Jindal, that was quite a win. Just another example of The Rising Young GOP Star, Cursed Forever by the SOTU Response.
The kitchen setting was the perfect metaphor for what MAGA intends for women: put them back in their place - “Kinder Kirche Kuche,” as their wonderboy Adolf put it.
I’ve spent enough time in Hollywood to be completely conversant with serious failure in public, and Britt’s performance didn’t even rise to the local-dinner-theater overacting you see from those who never had talent to begin with. With a Republican candidate for governor in her state of Alabambam campaigning on revoking women’s right to vote, and all the other MAGA moves to make the Handmaid’s Tale a documentary, delivering her speech in a kitchen was…
A choice. One of those tiny moments that completely illuminate the larger reality.
And then…
Appropos of nothing other than I love it when a Real Asshole gets punched really hard in the face, the news this morning that Doctor Feelgood Ronny Jackson has “Gotten His” brings a smile to my face that might last the weekend:
After the Defense Department Inspector General report on the White House Medical Unit found “Doctor Feelgood” had engaged in “inappropriate conduct” when he was the top White House physician for Presidents Obama and Trump, the Navy removed him from the Rear Admiral list last June. Yes, Jackson, who was a rear admiral when he retired in 2019, is now listed as a captain.
A spokesperson for the Navy stated that the “substantiated allegations in the DoDIG investigation of Rear Adm Ronny Jackson are not in keeping with the standards the Navy requires of its leaders and, as such, the Secretary of the Navy took administrative action in July 2022.”
Hurrah!
The losers just keep on losing. It’s what losers do.
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“ Now your getting your friends to defend you in the comments”
NOW I KNOW UR BITCHASS AINT TALKING 💀💀💀💀 NOW YOU GETTING MAD CAUSE I ACTUALLY COOKED YOUR ASS WITH YOUR
Nikkocado, Wanna be a muahahah devious cartoon bully, cant cook ppl for shit 💀, no bitches, no life, most likely to be a asshole career, zero friends and zero iq points
Mf burgen troll looking ass, stupid wattpad yandere bully character, skippable useless ad, got no game got no skill IN GAMES, got NOTHING
maybe instead of being a fucking asshole and hiding on anon im sure we can work things out so you can type out an aplogoy before i fucking cook your burnt non-visible flatass, outward abbs, looking like pearl from fucking spongebob tryna seem all touf until shit happens 🤧🤧
so like, we can either have things go a much more peaceful route where we adknowledge you were in the wrong or we will remember you as some stupid ass “maybe shell like me if im mean to her” obsessed with rocky because shes not into fucking asshole idiots like you 🤷🏻♀️
🫶🏻 too scared to unanon so we can fry yo ass, sending you lotsa love
yours truly packgoddess frankie 🫶🏻🫶🏻💚💚💚
*SIPS TEA AGGRESSIVELY* POP OFF FRANKIE
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Give him the chest plate, Pearl.
First time using ipad iq. I think it turnd out to be pretty good
#mcyt#mcytblr#mcyters#smallishbeans#smalletho#boat boys#double life etho#double life gtws#double life smp#Dlsmp#dlsmp impulse#pearlescentmoon#dlsmp pearl#dl grian#grian#dl smp fanart#my art
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The Black Pearl Brigade chapter 15: Shining Diamond, part 1 (originally posted on July 18, 2022)
AN: At long last, the two-part series finale to The Black Pearl Brigade is here! Almost everything that I've been building up to over the past fourteen chapters will all come to this, so strap in everyone, this is going to be one crazy rollercoaster! Or at least, the best rollercoaster that I can make.
Synopsis: While the Diamonds are away, Cinnabar uses this as a chance to conquer Homeworld, and the Pearls must stop her.
Cast:
Deedee Magno-Hall as The Black Pearl Brigade, Black Pearl Guards
Avi Roque as Cinnabar
Awkwafina as Kyanite
Allison Janney as Pyrite
Kimberly Brooks as Dalmatian Jasper
Zehra Fazal as Zoisite
Lena Hall as Bloodstone
Jodie Whittaker as Xenotime
Dee Bradley Baker as Concretes, George, Elaine, Cosma
Christine Pedi as Holly Blue Agate, Fire Agate
Hayley Kiyoko as Morganite, Violet Morganite
Casey Lee Williams as Cat's Eye
Charlyne Yi as Navy
Matthew Moy as Lars
Kathleen Fisher as Fluorite
Enuka Okuma as Rhodonite
Ashly Burch as Rutile Twins
Erica Luttrell as Padparadscha Sapphire, Orange Sapphire
Christine Baranski as Hessonite
Olivia Olson as Citrine
Nicole Sullivan as Sylvia Spectre
Kathleen Barr as Púrén
Alex Newell as Mozanite
Uzo Aduba as Bismuth Guards
Miriam Hyman as Bismuth Guards
Shelby Rabara as Peridots
--
"Darkness, all I know is darkness." Xenotime morosely monologued to herself in a prison cell. "I have no one to trust anymore. They have all abandoned me due to my arrogance. And now, there is no one left to stand up for me anymore. All that is left is the soul-crushing reality of loneliness." However, her despair was cut off by her jailmate pounding on the wall between their cells.
"WILL YOU KEEP IT DOWN?!" Cat's Eye yelled. "Your whining is so annoying!"
"Like you're one to talk, Little Miss 'I Was Once One Of Homeworld's Biggest High-Rollers Only To Lose Everything Because I Was Outsmarted By a Pearl'!" Xenotime argued with Cat's Eye.
"Hey, keep it down in there, you two!" the Bismuth standing guard ordered the bickering prisoners.
In the time that passed since the Rutile Rebels' base on Revanche 666 was destroyed, the facility was quickly rebuilt to serve as a prison for any supporters that the Black Pearl Brigade had arrested on their missions. Xenotime happened to be one of its many prisoners, and her jail mates included a Violet Morganite, an Orange Sapphire, and a Fire Agate. But some of its most notable inmates were Holly Blue Agate, Morganite, Cat's Eye, and the Ruby commonly known as Navy. Serving as its faculty were numerous Black Pearls that were rehabilitated by the Diamonds, along with many Bismuths and Peridots that formerly belonged to Demantoid.
"You cannot keep us in here for long!" Holly Blue yelled from her confinement. "Black Rutile will attain victory over the Crystal Gems, and she will free us from the prison you put us in!"
"Yeah, right." A Peridot replied with a sneer. "So you can go back to being an irritating bootlicker."
"She's right, you know." Fire Agate waspishly agreed. "There's a reason why so many Gems hate you. You're not only just so abusive, even by our standards, but also completely incompetent at your job as well. I mean, the Crystal Gems could only get away with ruining your life because you didn't notice that the Pearl didn't bother covering her star!"
The other Gems began erupting in laughter at Holly's expense, at least until one of the Black Pearls calmed them down. "Quiet, all of you!" the Pearl commanded her prisoners.
"Yes, ma'am." The imprisoned Gems obediently replied just as alarms began going off, catching the Pearls' attention as they raced to investigate what was happening.
"What's going on?" Morganite asked.
"It's a riddle!" Navy exclaimed cheerfully.
"I wouldn't get your hopes up." Orange Sapphire declared. "It would take a miracle for something to go our way."
Contrary to Orange Sapphire's defeatist attitude, a miracle was indeed coming to rescue them. Fresh off abandoning Torius Vosania and pitting the crime lord against the Pearls so she could cover her tracks, Cinnabar had piloted a Vosania Syndicate ship to fly to Revanche 666. She was plotting a massive breakout to bolster her ranks and conquer Homeworld in the name of her superior and old teacher Black Rutile.
"Look at this. Our old base now a symbol of oppression." Dalmatian Jasper sighed disdainfully. "How did it come to this?"
"Well, you won't have to worry any longer, my friends!" Pyrite declared as she handed each of Cinnabar's colleagues a laser gun to use. "With some help from Bloodstone and Cinnabar, I give you all what I call Rejuvenation Blasters. They're essentially an upgraded form of Black Rutile's override command, which means one zap of these can reduce a Gem to what they originally were made to do with no trace of who they became."
"Whoa, cool!" Kyanite exclaimed and began pointing her Rejuvenation Blaster around before Cinnabar put a stop to her reverie.
"Don't point that thing and accidentally hit one of us!" Cinnabar yelled angrily. "Pyrite just said these blasters will reset a Gem to their original settings!"
"I'm sorry Cinnabar!" Kyanite shrank down in fear of criticism from her boss. "Please don't hurt me!"
"No, no, I won't." Cinnabar said nonchalantly. "With these blasters, we can strengthen our army once again and release all of our allies from this prison. Since the Pearls are probably too occupied with stopping Torius Vosania right now, that will give us the chance to take everyone by surprise. Zoisite!"
"Landing as we speak, my Cinnabar." Zoisite announced as she sat at the pilot's seat and began bringing the Vosania ship closer to the prison. "This should be fun."
--
"Attention intruders, come out with your hands up!" a Black Pearl commanded the ship's occupants as she and five other Pearls surrounded the vessel in the prison's docking bay. "If you do not comply, we will have to resort to drastic measures!"
"You see, that's the thing." Dalmatian Jasper stated as she disembarked from the ship with Rejuvenation Blaster in hand. "I only have one hand." Using that very hand, DJ then fired at the leading Black Pearl, sending a shock to her system as she writhed in pain before collapsing to the floor. Seconds later, the other Black Pearls were greeted with the revolting sight of their leader rising up with no sense of emotion or identity, and she had only one thing to say.
"All hail Black Rutile." The Pearl droned ominously. Fearing what Cinnabar could do to the rest of them, the remaining guards decided to flee to try and keep the intruders at bay.
"Code red, everyone, it's Cinnabar!" another Black Pearl exclaimed before she was zapped with a Rejuvenation Blaster, reducing her to yet another thrall of Black Rutile's will. "All hail Black Rutile."
The other four Pearls immediately made a break for it, not caring that Cinnabar and her colleagues were in hot pursuit and following them to the main prison area. But by the time they finally reached their destination, the real carnage began. Pearls were being shot down left and right while Gems were released from their cells, starting a massive prison riot. Despite their efforts, the Bismuths and Peridots were overpowered by Cinnabar's superior numbers as she did a few quick errands during the chaos.
"Cinnabar, is that you?!" Xenotime gasped as Cinnabar hacked into the timekeeper's cell to free her from her imprisonment. "What is the meaning of this?! What's all the rioting for?!"
"I was simply buying myself time while breaking all of you out." Cinnabar explained herself. "And yes, that means you too, Xenotime. I have plans for you now involving a certain little planet."
"You mean I'm going back to Homeworld?" Xenotime asked her commander. "I can assure you; I have long since abandoned any thirst for power; you can count on me!"
"Oh no, you're not the only one." Cinnabar corrected Xenotime as she handed her a Rejuvenation Blaster before releasing Holly Blue, Fire Agate, Morganite, Violet Morganite, Cat's Eye, Orange Sapphire, and Navy from their cells as well. She then quickly handed them their own Rejuvenation Blasters to use against the prison staff. "Use these to reprogram whatever Gems employed at this dirt pile you can find. Once you are done, meet me back at the docking bay."
"I am most grateful for your timely arrival, Cinnabar." Morganite bowed to her fellow Gem rebel with her hands clasped. "I am forever in your debt."
"Please, you're making me blush." Cinnabar giggled jokingly before turning serious again. "Now then, get to work!"
At that command, the freed rebels began descending the prison into chaos. Almost an hour passed before every Pearl was subjected to the override command and forced to serve the Rutile Rebels once more. As for the Bismuths and Peridots, they were forced on their knees as Cinnabar looked down upon them with a wicked smirk, ready to execute whichever one of them spoke out against her.
"Why?!" a Peridot gasped in disbelief that Cinnabar was still active. "Why?!" Cinnabar did not answer, instead summoning her sword from her gem and using it to stab the Peridot in hers, shattering her.
"How utterly pathetic that we were able to overwhelm you all this easily." Cinnabar declared, her voice echoing throughout the prison. "Now then, we are standing here right now with 20,000 hardcore rebels wrongfully imprisoned here throughout the Brigade's existence. There may be thousands more of these Gems back on Homeworld, but I believe we are better equipped for a fight than they'll ever be."
"How so, my Cinnabar?" Holly Blue asked.
"We have recently pitted the crime lord Torius Vosania against our traitorous Pearl friends," Bloodstone revealed, eliciting gasps from the freed Gems at the thought of their acting leader siding with someone like Torius. "And once he is defeated, we can swoop in and quickly take control of his forces that he brought to Homeworld, thus giving us the military might to take Homeworld by force."
"Very astute observation, Bloodstone." Cinnabar nodded. "And that reminds me, I have Gems still on the inside who should be informing me of what's going on right about now." After pulling out a black, octahedral communicator and giving it a few turns, the communicator levitated in the air before displaying the fall of Torius Vosania, live from Homeworld for all the Gems to see. "Just as I predicted."
"Yeah, Homeworld, here we come!" Kyanite cheered and convinced the others to start rejoicing as well, for their home planet would soon be theirs to conquer. As the former prisoners celebrated, Holly Blue looked at Cinnabar and smiled. Not an evil smile, but a genuine one.
"Why Cinnabar," Holly Blue declared proudly. "I think Black Rutile would be so proud of you."
"Her applause is all I need." Cinnabar responded. "Now come, to our brightest day!"
--
With 20,000 formerly imprisoned Gems on her side, plus dozens of reprogrammed Black Pearls and her five lieutenants, Cinnabar took swift control of the Vosania Syndicate as soon as she returned to Homeworld and began reigning terror over her former home planet. Everything she had been planning for had all come to this. And all it took was taking by surprise the Pearls that had been a thorn in her side for too long.
As the restored Rutile Rebels, now aided by the forces of the Vosania Syndicate, began laying waste to a Homeworld fresh off the fall of Torius Vosania and without the Diamonds to protect them, Holly Blue took a moment to gaze upon the carnage below her as she watched the invasion from the Vosania Syndicate's mothership. "Ah, giving inferior lifeforms their just desserts is so sweet, isn't that right Cinnabar?"
"Yes, Era 3 left them completely powerless to fight back against us." Cinnabar responded with a smirk. "Their armies are no more, and now the Diamonds have abandoned them in favor of Earth. Once we enslave this planet, we can contact Black Rutile and have her take her rightful place as the ruler of all Gems."
"But Cinnabar, what of the Black Pearl Brigade?" Navy asked, bringing up a screen of the Pearls trying their best to stop the chaos.
"I believe it's about time we bring them over to our side." Cinnabar proudly stated before preparing a Rejuvenation Blaster and turning to Xenotime. "Xenotime, I have a job for you."
"Let me guess, eliminate the Pearls and bring them to you?" Xenotime asked, turning to Cinnabar in a disturbingly inhuman fashion with a smile to match. "I will do as I'm told."
"You sure you're not just lying through your teeth and plotting revenge for having your takeover plot on Blacropolis foiled?" Cat's Eye wondered with a purr.
"Why yes, I am still irate about that," Xenotime declared. "but I'm a changed Gem now. No more megalomaniacal schemes, I am all over that."
"You keep telling yourself that." Morganite frowned sardonically while Xenotime left to get revenge on the Pearls for exposing her back at the party.
--
Down on Homeworld's surface, the Pearls, Hessonite, Citrine, the Light Prisms, Sylvia Spectre, and Mozanite worked side by side to contain the Cinnabar threat, fighting forcibly reprogrammed Black Pearls, ex-con Gems, and Tenno soldiers reactivated by Bloodstone while trying to think of a plan to stop Cinnabar.
"So, we're just eight Gems, three Light Prisms, and a space heroine against the apprentice of a terrorist and her new army she stole from another terrorist." Tails said while shooting down Tenno. "Anyone got any bright ideas?"
"Wouldn't you like to know?" Citrine responded. "I mean, here we are with nothing but our wit and our will to save all of Gemkind! Do you think that will be enough?!"
"Maybe it can, but we could use a little more!" Hessonite replied courageously. "Someone buy me time, I have a call to make!"
"On it!" Sylvia exclaimed as she phased out of view and began taking out Tenno and Gems while leading Hessonite somewhere safe for her to call up help. "Over here!"
"Your help is greatly appreciated." Hessonite thanked Sylvia as she went into hiding and opened her communicator. "Hello, Lars? I think now I need your help. Cinnabar's back."
Just then, Mozanite noticed a shadow with an alarm clock-like head hiding in the shadows as she crawled towards the group. "Uh, Prisms, you're seeing this too, right?"
George, Elaine and Cosma tried yelling for Hessonite to turn around, but unfortunately, it was too late as Xenotime suddenly froze time.
--
"Captain's log, date May 4, 2018." Lars narrated to himself as the Sun Incinerator cruised through the final frontier where no man had gone before. "It's been a routine few weeks ever since our last encounter with any Rutile Rebels. With how quiet everything has been lately, sometimes I wonder if maybe it's time I head back to Earth for a visit at some point."
"Lars is going to monologue to himself again about current events." Padparadscha Sapphire observed while at her station.
"You've been doing that quite a lot lately, captain." Fluorite added while emerging from below deck. "You said it keeps you busy while reminding you of those Earth shows, right?"
"You bet it does." Lars responded. "Still would be nice to get a little action again. Maybe we just need something to get us on the right path." Suddenly, the Incinerator's computer systems began beeping as a message from far off popped up, urging the recipients to open it. "Oh, speak of the devil! Does anyone want to open it?"
"I'll do it!" Rhodonite exclaimed and began playing the message. From what the Off-Colors and their human captain could gather, Hessonite was shown in the middle of a great battle on a familiar planet. "Look, it's Hessonite!"
"Hello, Lars? I think now I need your help. Cinnabar's back." Hessonite stated. "Cinnabar has taken over the Vosania Syndicate and launched a full-scale attack on Homeworld while the Diamonds are away! She also seems to have released all the Rutile Rebels captured by the Brigade from prison! Please, the Pearls and I need your help!" Just then, Xenotime popped out of nowhere, freezing time around Hessonite and knocking her out cold while causing the message to cut off.
"Vosania Syndicate, as in Torius Vosania?!" Lars shouted as the message ended. "Aw, man, I would've loved to go up against him!"
"Regardless, they still need our help!" the left Rutile said before turning to her twin.
"Right, all engines, full power!" the right Rutile added and began setting the ship up to blast off.
"We are heading to Homeworld to help Hessonite and the Pearls!" Padparadscha cheered before the Sun Incinerator began flying towards Homeworld.
--
The Sun Incinerator finally reached Homeworld in record time, allowing Lars and the Off-Colors to get up close and personal with the destruction Cinnabar brought to the planet and the Gems. Ships and troopers belonging to the Vosania Syndicate began getting things under control when they arrived, forcing Gems into organized lines as they were ordered to give up the freedom Era 3 had given them all. None of them were thrilled to be forced to obey Cinnabar's commands, and neither were the Off-Colors as they watched with shock and confusion over what had happened.
"Wow, did we miss a lot." Lars declared in horror as he saw the Rutile Rebels' sigil planted everywhere they looked. "Come on guys, let's find somewhere safe to land so we can group up with the others."
"I don't think that'll be possible." Rhodonite answered shakily, pressing a button that showed her captain that every likely place for the Sun Incinerator to land had currently been occupied. "From what I can see here, any Gem that tries to land anywhere on Homeworld will be dealt with, if you get what I mean."
"Rhodonite is going to suggest an alternative to landing." Padparadscha declared.
"Exactly my point!" Rhodonite exclaimed. "I think we should try shooting down any ships that try to cross our path."
"Good idea Rhodonite." Fluorite agreed with her fellow fusion's plan. "You've certainly come a long way, dear."
"Thank you." Rhodonite blushed shyly before turning to Lars. "Okay, Lars, you ready?"
"Always ready." Lars replied as he turned on the ship's loudspeakers to make his declaration. "Hey, Rutile Rebels!" he called out to the insurgent Gems. "Guess who's back on Homeworld with a vengeance! That's right; it's the man, the myth, the legend, Lars of the Stars!" He took a moment to pause before revealing the Sun Incinerator's weapons. "NOW EAT THIS, SUCKERS!"
The Sun Incinerator then opened fire on every enemy ship trying to attack them. Many ships fell to the Off-Colors' ferocious onslaught as Lars let out a maniacal laugh in triumph. "Video games have taught me so well!"
"Lars is going for an all-out attack!" Padparadscha exclaimed.
"This oughta show 'em!" the Rutiles added as they kept firing the ship's armaments. Suddenly, however, time began to freeze around the Off-Colors as Xenotime entered the spaceship, having snuck in without anyone noticing.
"Oh, Lars, didn't expect to see you here." Xenotime cackled as the timekeeper stroked Lars's frozen face. "Cinnabar would definitely want to see you and your off-color friends as well, especially after what I did to the Pearls." She then smugly tossed Lars off his captain's chair and took her seat in it before returning time to its normal flow, allowing the undead human to discover her presence.
"Xenotime?!" Lars screamed as he got up from where Xenotime threw him. "How did you get here?!"
"Stopping time. What else?" Xenotime snidely responded. "Ooh, this is a very nice chair you got here. You stole it from Emerald, right?"
"Captain Lars, we've been boarded!" Padparadscha yelped. "By Xeno-"Xenotime then shut the Sapphire up by zooming towards her and stabbing Paddy with her gear-shaped wrist blades, poofing her.
"She was only ever good for stating the obvious and thinking people will laugh." Xenotime rolled her eyes under her helmet before turning to the other Off-Colors, who were now enraged by how she took out their friend. "Anyone else care to join her?"
"You monster!" Fluorite roared as she dropped her grandmotherly persona in favor of charging at Xenotime like a raging beast. Xenotime thought quickly and froze once again with a snap of her fingers before lunging at Fluorite with her arm-blades at the ready, poofing the six-Gem fusion without a second thought and letting out a mighty "WRRRRYYYY!" Xenotime then took out Rhodonite and the Rutile twins, poofing them with just as little effort because she had that little faith in their possible fighting abilities.
When Xenotime snapped her fingers once again to restore the flow of time, Lars was left as the sole survivor of her massacre of his crew, the one thing that kept him sane while he was first marooned on Homeworld and began making his mark as Lars of the Stars. Now they're all gone, and it was all thanks to this sociopathic megalomaniac standing with her arms akimbo and a cocky grin on her face.
Lars couldn't take it anymore, so he let out the only insult for Xenotime he could come up with as he let his young adult anger overtake him. "YOU BITCH!" Charging straight at the timekeeper without a thought on his mind, Lars used his musti-yuddha skills to gain the upper hand against Xenotime. Still, her thousands of years of experience, combined with her unnatural body movements, allowed the controller of time to be an even match for the pink boy.
"Let's see you get off on taking away my friends after I do this!" Lars screamed like an animal as he punched Xenotime straight in her visor, smacking her so hard that her hair started ringing like alarm clock bells. Xenotime had no time to deal with Lars any longer, so she knocked him out in one fell swoop.
"We had some intruders that I felt like dealing with." Xenotime declared while speaking to Holly Blue through the Sun Incinerator's communications system. "I shall bring them in posthaste."
"Exemplary work, Xenotime." Holly complimented her fellow insurgent. "You know, maybe you have changed after all."
"I'm only doing as I feel like doing." Xenotime replied before ending the call and beginning to pilot the Sun Incinerator towards the Syndicate mothership.
--
As Homeworld continued descending into organized chaos, Cinnabar gazed upon her masterwork with a pleased grin on her face. She could imagine only how elated Black Rutile would be of her old student as the Rutile took her rightful place as supreme ruler of all Gemkind after destroying the Crystal Gems once and for all.
As Cinnabar began picturing the praises that would no doubt be showered upon her, she felt like giving one last grandiloquent speech for the road. "My friends, it has often been said that I like war." She declared to the troops standing with her on the mothership. "Friends, I like war. NO! Friends. I. LOVE. WAR. I love genocide; I love destruction, I love causing confusion and delay, I love chaos, I just love every act of war that can occur on this or any other planet."
Cinnabar continued her speech, thriving in how much she worshipped the subject matter Black Rutile had carefully taught her for thousands of years. "My heart leaps with joy whenever there are enemies that try their best to resist, only to have their hopes completely dashed by our superior numbers and firepower. And the sight of traitors being strung up like the cowardly wretches they are is just as much an irresistible pleasure." Then her sadistic smile faded, as if mourning the loss of someone she cared for so deeply. "But unfortunately, it seems now that I am forbidden from doing what I love doing, what I was meant to do. But thanks to all of you, my love for war has been reignited."
The Gems began chanting while pulling their weapons from their gems, bellowing in reverence of Cinnabar, Black Rutile, and the Rutile Rebels' just cause. "My friends, all I ask for is war." Cinnabar continued. "A war so grand that it shall make the cosmos quiver! We may be but a large battalion, but we will remind all Gems what they were meant to be! We will remind them what it means to be warriors, to take what's ours with no remorse for who we take it from! My friends, all I ask is to bring them all hell."
Just then, Fire Agate arrived from Cinnabar's left and began delivering her some good news. "My Cinnabar, we have just received word that Xenotime has successfully captured the Black Pearl Brigade." She revealed to Cinnabar's delight. "We've also just learned that the Off-Colors have arrived on Homeworld as well, only for all of them to be poofed while Lars was knocked unconscious, and their ship claimed by Xenotime."
"Ah, that is music to my ears." Cinnabar declared happily before she began to walk away from her troops. "The rest of you, keep spreading Black Rutile's good word. I shall attend to some old friends of mine."
--
The past few minutes were all a blur for the Pearls. One moment, they were busy fighting rebel Gems and Tenno alongside Hessonite's team, Sylvia and the Prisms; the next, they found themselves taken prisoner by their old foe Xenotime. They barely even realized that the timekeeper had returned to get her revenge on them because she took them all by surprise after freezing time to capture all five of them plus their allies. With no knowledge of what could be in store for them, the Pearls were shoved inside the same interrogation room where their adventures first began.
"Did anyone know what just happened?" Cap gasped in shock.
"I haven't the foggiest what had occurred either." Braids replied, just as alarmed at their current circumstances. "Did anyone catch Xenotime either?"
"I barely got a glimpse of her." Tails answered. "It's almost as if Cinnabar released every Gem we've ever defeated."
"Then how come we're only seeing one of them?" IQ asked. "Seems like kind of a waste of time if you're only going to put one Gem to use."
"Still, I can't believe we lost that easily." Pony declared. "And who knows? Maybe it'll be the last time we'll lose altogether, depending on what Cinnabar does to us."
"We did indeed have some good times together." Braids remarked nostalgically. "Remember when we visited Sergione-29? That was a fun planet to hang out on, prejudice aside."
"Yeah, that gave me some really good character growth there." Pony responded. "Or what about getting invited to a Brain Brawl? I had a lot of fun there too!"
"Yeah, why can't we go back to the old days of having adventures and fighting evil together?" IQ replied, now shedding tears of nostalgia. "Because right now, I'd give anything to get those times back."
"Me too." Tails sighed in defeat as she started crying as well. "Guess this really is it. No matter what happens, I hope we can still be a family regardless."
"Ditto." Cap concurred with her sniper. "Makes me wonder how Púrén and Sculder are doing." As the Pearls began sharing a tearful goodbye, the door to the interrogation room opened, and in stepped Cinnabar with a pair of Concretes by her side, cutting their touching scene short as Cap glowered at her Rutile Rebel counterpart. "You!"
"I have to admit, Pearls, your sense of family is one of the things I find most admirable about you five." Cinnabar stated snidely. "Well, that and your refusal to know when you should give up. However, neither will be useful against me anymore, for I hold all the cards now."
"It does not matter how many cards you hold; good will triumph in the end!" Braids yelled at Cinnabar before she tried to punch one of her accompanying Concretes, only to be met with a bruised hand. "Ouch! Curse you!"
"Where is everyone else?" IQ asked Cinnabar.
"As you may know, I sent down Xenotime to deal with any remaining threats to my power," Cinnabar proclaimed. "which means that not only are your Off-Color friends my prisoners, but also Hessonite & Citrine, that Coalition brat, the Light Prisms and that Mozanite you dragged along as well. We have also sought to claim your ship and your android companion for ourselves."
"Whatever you monsters do with Púrén and Sculder, I swear I'll make you pay!" IQ screamed angrily.
"What do you plan for us now?" Cap asked, just as furious at their archnemesis.
"You know, over these past few months, I think I've had an epiphany." Cinnabar declared. "With all that's been happening lately, you've all certainly grown in both skill and personality, which is why I wish to make you an offer." Before the Pearls could answer, she immediately cut them all off. "I think we should let bygones be bygones and maybe start working together, I could even make you commanders of my new army!" She then extended her hand. "What do you say, Pearls?"
Unfortunately, none of the Pearls took the offer. Instead, Braids took Cinnabar's hand, curled it into a fist, and used it to punch her in the face repeatedly. "Oh my, why are you hitting yourself?! Do you have that little faith in your own abilities?!"
"Oh ha ha, the old why are you hitting yourself ploy, very funny." Cinnabar sneered, stopping herself mid-punch before flipping Braids to the floor. "I only want us to be friends here. Is it really that hard?"
"Of course it's that hard when you're plotting to conquer us all!" Pony stated. "Admit it, you're just a diet Black Rutile. Fitting as you were her apprentice."
"I am far beyond what my master is!" Cinnabar yelled back. "I am my own Gem these days, and none of you can ever change that!"
"Touched a nerve there, haven't we?" IQ snickered evilly while pretending to adjust a pair of imaginary glasses. "It seems you're rather touchy about living up to Black Rutile's expectations, aren't you?"
"You're lying!" Cinnabar snapped in embarrassment. "And I'm going to make sure you never lie again, friends." She then turned to her Concrete companions. "Bring the Brigade to the stand. It's high time I finally execute them for their crimes."
--
"Oh, my head." Lars moaned as he slowly regained consciousness. Though his vision was blurry, he could barely make out the shapes of Hessonite and Citrine, along with Sylvia Spectre cradling his throbbing head in her hands. "Did I die and go to beautiful alien woman heaven? Oh wait, I can't die."
"No, we're prisoners now." Sylvia declared as Lars finally came to, and he realized what had just happened.
"Oh no, where am I?!" Lars yelled worriedly. "Where are the Off-Colors, the Prisms! Mozanite!"
"Hey, calm down human. They're all fine." Kyanite declared as she stepped into the interrogation room to confront her four guests. "We're just going to shatter the Gems and reset the Prisms back to their original setting later, that's all."
"You monsters!" Citrine yelled as she pinned Kyanite against the wall. "If you want to hurt any of our friends, you're gonna have to get through me first!" Unfortunately for Citrine, her threats proved utterly empty as Kyanite freed herself from the vigilante quartz's trap and thoroughly trounced her in the most one-sided fight she had ever fought.
"Let's make one thing clear, Citrine." Kyanite growled with a foot pinning Citrine to the ground as a way of threatening her other prisoners, the opposite of the pleasant sycophant she always presented herself as. "I'm not in here with you, you're in here with me! Let me clue you all in, you are all in danger, and that danger is me! A Gem opens the door and gets poofed, you think that of me? No, I am the one who knocks!"
"Oh my, so forceful." Hessonite began trembling in fear of Kyanite's more brutal demeanor. "This is a side of you I never saw before."
"Yeah, why are you only now breaking this out?" Lars asked. "This seems completely out of nowhere!"
"You may think I just pulled it out of my butt, and you're kinda right." Kyanite replied nonchalantly. "I just never had the right opportunity to act this way."
"So, what will happen to us?" Sylvia asked Cinnabar's bodyguard.
"Once we're done with the Pearls, we have plans for the rest of you." Kyanite explained. "You shall be imprisoned in the tower, where you shall await your punishments. Hessonite, Citrine, and Mozanite will be shattered along with the Off-Colors for their treasonous crimes against Black Rutile's new Homeworld order. The Prisms shall be reverted to their original functions as tools of war." While Hessonite gritted her teeth in anger and Citrine looked down ashamedly, Kyanite then looked at Lars and Sylvia. "And as for you two, we shall send Sylvia back to the Coalition as a declaration of war. But for Lars, well, Bloodstone would love to learn the secrets of your immortality."
"Oh no, I'm gonna get dissected." Lars predicted shakily. "Please, I don't care what you do to me, just leave all my friends on Earth out of this!"
"Sorry, pinkie boy, but I'm afraid Earth will be our next stop once Homeworld is ours to control." Kyanite laughed smugly just as a Concrete stepped through the door, catching her attention. "Hold on, gotta take this." She then turned around to walk over to the Concrete, who began speaking in groans that she could somehow understand. "Yeah? I see. Uh-huh. Okay? Got it." Her conversation ended, and the bodyguard returned to her captives as the Concrete walked away. "Good news you guys, you're getting front row seats to the Brigade's execution!"
"No!" Lars, Hessonite, and Citrine cried out in horror at the news.
"You won't get away with this!" Sylvia added furiously.
"You know, they always say we won't get away with this, even though we've already done it." Kyanite pondered. "Why do people keep saying that?"
--
A few hours later, Cinnabar and her cohorts had the Pearls lined up for all their fellow Gems to see. Lars, Team Hessonite, and Sylvia were also there, now forced to watch from the sidelines as their friends were set to be wiped off all discernible personality traits. "Gems of the Rutile Rebels, lend me your ears!" Cinnabar announced loudly. "At long last, our finest hour has finally come! With the Diamonds away from Homeworld and Torius Vosania imprisoned for his crimes, we now have all we need to restore the Gem race to our former glory!" The assembled insurgents began cheering in response. "Now we have no one left to oppose us! And to anyone that still won't obey, I suggest you pack your things and leave, or fight us all and die!"
"You know, being a rebel isn't bad after all." Cat's Eye meowed. "I didn't care for Black Rutile's goals at first, but after the Crystal Gems ruined my life and I was turned from high-roller to criminal, I think maybe she does have the right idea."
"Glad you could finally join us, Cat." Holly Blue grinned at the aristocrat turned failed lawyer.
"I bet the boss will be pleased as punch with what we've done with the place." Morganite commented while standing next to Navy. "Now I can finally regain all the attention the Crystal Gems have stolen from me and put my talents to good use again."
"I agree!" Navy cheered. "Eyeball will be so happy with how I helped."
"Enough talk, all of you!" Cinnabar ordered while arming herself with a Rejuvenation Blaster that she presented to the audience. "I present to you all the latest in disciplinary technology, the Rejuvenation Blaster, developed as a collaborative effort between myself and two of my servants, Pyrite and Bloodstone." Pyrite began blushing, and Bloodstone beamed with pride as their efforts were applauded. "Using an override command that our lord Black Rutile bestowed upon me as the base, this weapon can zap any Gem it targets and reduce them to their most basic functions." Cinnabar continued. "The real kicker, there's no way to reverse the changes this time. Observe."
Cinnabar knew exactly which Pearl to shoot first, that one being Cap. With a single pull of the Rejuvenation Blaster's trigger, the leader of the Brigade became the first to lose all trace of her original identity and be reduced to nothing but a mindless soldier. "All hail Black Rutile."
The rest quickly followed. Pony, Braids, IQ, and Tails were then zapped next and met the same fate, droning the exact words as they got up. "All hail Black Rutile."
"ALL HAIL BLACK RUTILE!" the Rutile Rebels began chanting as their conquest of Homeworld seemed absolute. "ALL HAIL BLACK RUTILE! ALL HAIL BLACK RUTILE!"
"Victory tastes so savory." Cinnabar said as she reveled in the adulation. "Who could possibly stop me now?!"
--
"Hello, Pearls? Can you hear me?" Púrén begged as the Servant was now Rutile Rebels property, alongside Sculder and the Sun Incinerator. "Pearls? Pearls?! PEARLS!"
--
Well, that was certainly a harrowing note to leave off on! Who could possibly save the Pearls now? Is there really no way of returning them to who they once were? Is there really no stopping Cinnabar? All these questions and more will be answered when The Black Pearl Brigade returns for the ultimate final chapter!
#steven universe#steven universe alternate future#fanfiction#the black pearl brigade#cap pearl#pony pearl#iq pearl#braids pearl#tails pearl#cinnabar#kyanite#pyrite#dalmatian jasper#zoisite#bloodstone#xenotime#holly blue agate#morganite#cat's eye#navy#lars barriga#fluorite#rhodonite#rutile twins#padparadscha sapphire#hessonite#citrine#mozanite#sylvia spectre
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I've been sucked into the wormhole of South Park OC's, meet Seb...!!
basic drawings I'll do more another time
Here's some info abt him:
Name: Sebastian Castillo, goes by Seb
Age: 9
Ethnicity: Puerto Rican
Pronouns: he/him
5th member of Craig and those guys
Here are his relationships with a lot of characters:
Craig: best friends, very alike, think stan and Kyle. Bond over mutual hatred for authority and cartman
Clyde: hang out and play video games a lot, Clyde tries to give Seb advice on how to get girls which he blatantly ignores
Jimmy: Seb is Jimmy’s biggest fan, and goes to all his comedy shows. They bond over their immature senses of humour
Tolkien: get along well, but Tolkien finds it annoying that Seb gets just as good grades as him despite doing no work
Stan: they hang out a lot because Sharon and Seb’s Mum are friends, so they’re at each other’s houses lots
Kyle: although they aren’t super close, they have a mutual respect and appreciation for each other; Kyle likes the fact that Seb has beaten up cartman and hates him, Seb thinks its cool that Kyle has enough patience to deal with him on a regular basis, and also thinks Kyle’s hat is cool
Cartman: Hates him like all the other kids, will beat him up any moment, and has gotten in trouble for it by PC Principal
Kenny: laugh at crude jokes together, Kenny’s invited to hang with craig’s gang by Seb sometimes when the Boys are doing something stupid and Kenny’s not there
Butters: Seb finds him a bit annoying and thinks he’s a pushover, but will defend him when it matters
Tweek: Sees Tweek quite a bit through Craig, and is working with Craig to ease him off coffee
If you wanna know his relationships with anyone else, lmk!!
Seb is unnaturally intelligent, and got 148 the one time he took an IQ test (despite not believing in them)
He actively practices Capoeira (dance fighting) and after being teased by Cartman for it, used it to beat him up in front of everyone to Smells like Teen Spirit
Loves grunge music, his favourite bands are Nirvana, Hole, Soundgarden, Mudhoney and The Smashing Pumpkins
He has a hatred for Pearl Jam and will literally never talk to you again if you say you like them
Family moved to South Park when he was 3, but he went to North Park elementary until year 4
He plays drums and has learnt to play through all of ‘In Utero’ on them
When he first came to SP elementary he hung with the goth kids but left cause he couldn’t handle their whining
His family is very anti-capitalism, so he makes or thrifts all his clothes (much to his dismay bc he wants name brand stuff, but still hates big corps)
Wants to start a band but thinks none of the kids are worthy of his talent
Superiority complex that he’s working through with his therapist (who he hates)
Veryyyy apathetic towards basically everyone
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meet my fandoms OCs!
This is gonna be a list always in update to show you my OCs included into famous fandoms; I'd like to have them separated by my 100% original stories; enjoy their playlists, infodumps and moodboards 🤍
For now I can offer to you them:
Mira (Marvel MCU)
Lara (The Sandman)
Nova (Alien Prometheus/Covenant)
Ophera (The Boys)
___________________________
Mira (of Blood and Mischief)
Fandom: Marvel (MCU) & X-Men
Name: Mira (Miroslayra) Frost - Vein (X-Men name)
Age: 37
Pronouns/Sexuality: she/her - pansexual
Hair colour: white with red regrowth
Eyes colour: red
Height: 1.83cm
Languages: Russian - English - Asgardian
Job/Occupation: so many, she worked for the X-Men and Shield for a short time, she deserted due to an accident into her teaching role at the X-Academy, after she had a collaboration with the Avengers and worked for a short time to the TVA. She always lived being a defensor.
Powers: blood manipulation - dimensional travel (after corruption arc)
Pairing: Loki (previously Erik Lehnsherr)
Parents: Emma Frost & Emplate
Like: hot tea - discovering new music types - late night bath - sea and lakes - fireworks - meditation - learning unusual facts - bad jokes - simple designed clothes - her vintage iPod - travelling - sharing with others her knowledge - poetry - the space - training and fighting
Dislike: extremely crowded places - cold weather - syringes and needles - everything that is medical related - lighthouses - noisy and loud people - stay alone at home for long times - Sentinels - sometimes Avengers
Mira Playlist 🎶
Mira Pinterest Board 🎨
Mira and Loki fanart 🖌️
___________________________
Lara (for your Eyes)
Fandom: Sandman
Name: Lara Campbell-Fobso
Age: 25
Pronouns/Sexuality: she/her - bisexual
Hair colour: dyed dark red (originally brown)
Eyes colour: hazel
Height: 1.79cm
Languages: English - French (not so much)
Job/Occupation: no one, she was dreaming to became a writer or a journalist
Powers: no one, she's human
Pairing: The Corinthian
Parents: unknown
Like: hanging out - shooting polaroids - organize photos on her personal devices - writing - long car riding - dancing into the club - drinking alcohol - smoking - shopping on vintage store - luxury places that she cannot afford - physical contact - lazy days at home - sleeping for long times and dreaming
Dislike: sand - following the rules - paying her rent and bills - working for the human system - the law - hot weather - people who makes fun of suicidal topics or psychiatric disorders
Lara Playlist 🎶
Lara Pinterest Board 🎨
___________________________
Nova (Heart-shaped Box)
Fandom: Alien Saga (Prometheus/Covenant)
Name: Nova (synthetic model N.O.V.A 0)
Age: 35
Pronouns/Sexuality: she/they - demisexual
Hair colour: pearl white
Eyes colour: transparent crystal white
Height: 1.77cm
Languages: she's programmed to speak all human languages and being able to communicate with numbers and morse code
Job/Occupation: Commander for space missions for the Vasser-Armiger Corporation
Powers: she's a sophysticated model of synthetic android, she has many abilities more than the humans, like speed, strenght, rapidity of thought, high IQ, she feel less pain, she's artificially made on the inside
Pairing: David 8
Parents: created by the Vasser-Armiger Corporation
Like: floating in zero gravity condition - staring at the deep space - listening philosophy about Gods and creations explained - instrumental synth music - admiring new life forms (at some points she find fascinating even Xenormorphs) - flying with a spaceship - accomplish her missions - still lakes views
Dislike: lazyness - rude manners - disrespect towards androids - AI without intellectual freedom - humans corporations
Nova Playlist 🎶
Nova Pinterest Board 🎨
___________________________
Ophera (American Horror Show)
Fandom: The Boys
Name: Ophera (Miranda Reinslayer)
Age: 33
Pronouns/Sexuality: she/her - bisexual
Hair colour: obsidian black
Eyes colour: deep red
Height: 1,75cm
Languages: American English
Job/Occupation: working superhero for the Vought; third member of the Seven
Powers: metals manipulation, super strenght and she can feel less pain than normal, her vocal cords are made of thin metal and she can sing wonderfully
Pairing: no one (abusive relationship with Homelander, faking to be a couple for the media)
Parents: unknown
Like: rock live music - smoking - ride her motorcycle - flying high (but hate asking to Homelander so she fly with a private jet) - doing missions outside the country - Queen Maeve and Starlight
Dislike: theatre - musical - radical religion -electric shocks jokes - Homelander - Madelyn Stillwell
Ophera Playlist 🎶
Ophera Pinterest Board 🎨
#my post#original character#fandom oc#fandom ocs#marvel#loki#loki series#loki laufeyson#the corinthian#marvel oc#xmen oc#oc game#ocs#my ocs#oc aesthetic#alien prometheus#alien covenant#david 8#alien saga#the boys#the boys amazon#the boys oc
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Random things about your future lover
Pictures do not belong to me they belong to their respective owners.
Note : this is a general reading so take what resonates and leave what doesn't.
Masterlist ✦ paid services ✦ offer
To book a personal reading with me please DM me.
PILE 1
Might be a virgo sun/moon/rising
Might know from childhood , they will give you nostalgia
Acts a kid around you but is mature around others.
Is a bad liar and doesn't know how to hide their emotions
Knows a lot of things, very knowledgeable
Is an introvert but has a lot of friends
Likes to keep their personal life a secret, doesn't like interference
Very rich and abundant
Likes helping people , could be into humanitarian work
Could meet them online or through a friend
have been cheated on in the past or had a bad ending of a relationship.
Has a nice smile. Or they can't see when they smile
Could have small cat eyes
Blue / completely black eyes
Is like a puppy to you but a wolf to others
Might like insects or might study about them.
Likes spoiling you with gifts
Might be a dancer or liked dancing
Might be born in may or june , these months could be important.
Walks very fast
Has a sad resting face or could look sad when they aren't
Only has soft spot for you.
Might like blue color or the ocean
Might have tanned/dark skin
Masterlist
PILE 2
Might be a Taurus, Leo or Sagittarius sun/moon/rising.
Might have a raspy voice
Can meet them after a long wait or when you will be waiting for something
Doesn't like being told what to do
Does opposite of what they're told to
Might be a foreigner or from a different background
Had curly hair
ld fashioned boy, will offer to pay for your things
Very famous among people, might be popular
Has a nice body, does exercise.
Doesn't lack anything in life
Might be a painter or artist
You both can have same interests
Will pull your let and tease you
Would like to have playful arguments with you
Love language can be soft bullying
Might have green eyes or wears contacts
Might like to color their hair
Might have a slightly curved downturned nose
Might be from South Asia
Might wear gold or platinum jewelry
Has nice hands and fingers
Might have a connection with Egypt
Might be born in August or meet them in August
Likes birds
Could have long black hair
A great debaters, loves messing with people's minds
Masterlist
PILE 3
Might have more feminine energy.
I'm getting two things : could be a family person or could have a hard time with their family.
Likes buying expensive things
Has a hard time taking side or making a choice
Likes to listen to others opinions and thoughts
Might have high IQ
Is into tarot and astrology or could even do tarot
Will challenge you into games
Might like chess or maths
Might wear white a lot or white could be their favorite color.
Could have pearl/moonstone as birth stone
Have been through lots of struggles in their life
Might have a hard time around new people.
Might born at night
Has a very unique and creative mind.
Might like roses or give you flowers as gifts
Has a protective mother or guardian
Could resemble 🙈 emoji when shy
Might have 3 siblings or could be a middle child.
Their mother a great importance in their life could be both negative and positive.
Could have a white pet animal.
Their mother could have done most of the parenting. Or could be a single mother.
People always come to them for help, they might have a hard time saying no.
Might have two best friends.
Masterlist
That's all! GOODBYE 👋
#tarot cards#tarot reading#free readings#free tarot#tarot#pick a card#pick a pile#pick a picture#tarotblr#pac tarot#pick a photo#pick an image#future spouse#love reading#oracle reading#tarot readings#intuitive readings#psychic readings#tarot and astrology#astrology and tarot#tarot community#tarot witch#tarotcommunity#tarot predictions#tarot pick a card#tarot pick a pile#pac reading#tarot pac#tarottribe#free tarot readings
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What are your favourite gifs from recent interviews and acting jobs? :)
Anon, I don't know if you realize what you have unleashed by asking this question. How much time have you got? Pull up a chair. 🪑 Okay, but seriously, what are we considering recent? 🤔 Fuck it, I'm gonna say anything from the last season of Fate, AB, and DA2. Which would include any press/interviews in that time, sounds legit enough to me.
Like always, under a read more for length and this time take that warning seriously. Also, this took a turn for the thirst so no one come clutching their pearls at me, thanks.
Most importantly, and most recently as luck would have it, would be the Act On This he just did with Ross. Y'all are probably tired of seeing my gifs from this by now but I'm not. Seriously, from a completely shallow POV, this man is fucking stunning. Who the fuck does he think he is? A beautiful bastard, that's who.
Profile? The grey? The NOSE?
And this one? Just fuck right off. He'll be hearing from my lawyers, I'm going to sue for thirst and suffering.
Okay and one more from this because I have zero self control.
Moving onto Ackley Bridge, we've got this one. The plaid? The belly? The jeans? Mr. Evershed be lookin' like such a Dad™, he needs to go mow a lawn and then be rewarded with a beer and a blowjob.
Speaking of dads, I love me a sad-tired-dad walk.
If I ever stop mentioning the tracksuit, assume that I'm dead. He looks fuzzy and cozy and just...a wild Mr. Evershed in his natural habitat. Also, thick thighs save lives.
Now truthfully, I'm not wild about the look in DA2 or Fate S2. Whoever decided to dye his hair should lose their job. I really don't care if whatever God they believe came straight from the sky and instructed them to do it, the reason still isn't valid enough for me, sorry. But these are a few of my favorite shots from both:
Back to press/interviews, can't forget the Act On This from 2022. Why do men never wear their glasses enough? And a plain black tee? 👀 And his laugh/smiles 🥺
And while the hosts in this interview had a room temperature IQ, he looked good af. I love the salt and pepper, his eyes were popping, the stubble was perfect. (*Also, shout out to him for enduring that, seriously. The moment his Thomas joke fell flat I think he realized the depths of idiocy he was dealing with it and the train just understandably continued to derail.)
DA2 press also provided these, which I've recently used in other gifsets but they're so nice we can look at them twice.
Okay, and one more from this interview because I'm pathetic but at least I'm aware.
Alexa, play Simply The Best. RIP Tina. 🙏
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fake dating and enemies to loverssss
A LITTLE GLIMPSE OF ENEMIES TO LOVERS
based on this request too
Such foolish questions get ridiculously, obnoxiously, horrifically foolish answers.” Y/N never wanted to kick someone and kiss someone at the same moment this bad as those stupid, stupid dimple shines in the home of his ivory cream cheek from him smirking down at Y/N his hand pressed into fluff of pillows beside the hall of her raven hair.
He’s been picking up on her habit of highlighting too many adverbs of the books she reads.
She rubs the sleep away with the hilts of her palm, blinking away the blur vision, “Perhaps you’ve a limited IQ level.” She taunts him. Humming down an angry grumble when it refused to ick him at all instead the hickory curl bounced with his soft annoying laugh and fuck if Y/N would be in good state of mind she’d have grabbed that full glass of water and thrown it at his beautifully ravenous face.
“I thought you’d be asleep when I came back, you had a tiring day..” His tongue pressed to the back of his front teeth as if he wanted to speak more– to tease her with his ludicrous pet names instead he leaned above her more, “I woke you up?” She watches the tightly coiled muscles rippling around his chest.
She rolls her lush green eyes fiercely to overcome her tiny silly reaction upon seeing him naked. She wouldn’t let it affect her not at all, “Isn’t that obvious?” She grits gripping the duvet tight under her chin.
He smirks, “I’m sorry about that.” He wasn’t sorry at all, “We need to talk doozy.” Y/N couldn’t calculate her emotions. The rage, the fucking viciousness to chop his balls off drowned her whole. She feels small. Feeling herself trapped into the body of the same sixteen year old Y/N.
“And talking requires you to be shirtless?” She murmurs, pushing her knee up and launching it to hit it into the side of his rib but he’s way faster than her, grabbing the top of it with an over-dramatically displeased expression.
“Talking doesn’t requires any clothes at all.” His smoky grin wavers back, “I promise you that some of the most interesting conversations takes place with no clothes to speak of.”
Heat blasted up her cheeks and neck resembling the light pink of her nightgown, “I’m sure you had tons of experience in having those type of conversations.”
“Jealous.” His lips puckers in fawn shock and amusement, “Hardly.” She quips and his grin increased fully displaying his pearl teeth and Y/N might be misunderstanding the awe for jealous for finding him this perfect.
“So…intrigued?” His long fingers gets losts into the raven waves of her hair, “I don’t fucking care how many people you’ve fucked.” She spats. Why’s she angry? Why there’s a tight ball of nameless emotion in the pit of her lungs and why above all that she wants to grab him by throat and hurl him to mattress, bracket him down with her thighs and force him to look in her eyes even though she doesn’t have to because he’s already gazing down at her intently, and torture him with the lesson to have his view as her for the whole night.
His view as someone he hates entirely and vice versa.
“Who said about fucking anyone? One could read and talk and share their thoughts bare skinned and cuddled against eachother.” His voice soft and Y/N doesn’t want to feel it. She’d rather step on a lego than to be feel admired from his tenderness.
“Can you please let me sleep..” She tries to turn over failing to do because of his heavy weight over the duvet, “So…distracted?”
“Harry! You better fuck off before I scream and kick and become your worst nightmare.” That elicited a howl of laugh from him and her breath shudders when his warmth pressed against her, she doesn’t budge to do remove him from the bedding rather gets lured and melts into his embrace as his hesitant wary touch lingers to wrap his arm around her waist.
“You’re already my worst nightmare and my loveliest dream.” Y/N didn’t know what that meant. Her mind too hazy and sleepy. Though, she sighs engulfed in his amber and vanilla-y spice scent, her lips sending shockwaves through his whole body as they brush against his forearms that’s looped above her head.
“Goodnight Harry.”
#enemies to lovers#harry styles enemies to lover fic#fake dating#fake dating trope#harry styles fake dating#harry styles blurb#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles smut#harry angst#harry styles fanfic
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