#intrusive thoughts about ocs
Text
Intrusive OC Thoughts
Everyone's probably had these about their own OCs at some point another, just random thoughts that managed to worm their way in. Here's just a few that came to my mind:
Through sheer force of will and determination to beat a man's ass, Amara manages to perform the impossible by forcing her way through stopped time in order to land a haymaker so mighty that it'd make even Star Platinum blush. The Time Stopper in question is only lucky that she only landed the one.
In a given scenario where she interacts with other versions of herself, Amara would undoubtedly get into a fist fight with all of them. There's an unspoken rule that they must fight to see which one is the strongest one.
She probably would have a genuinely difficult time in the world of Sonic The Hedgehog. Not because of any platforming challenges, but because she has to actively resist trying to pet everything. Even the badniks.
She probably would actually barely tolerate DBZ Broly but get along well with DBS Broly.
Amara might actually be a fantastic lounge singer.
0 notes
Text
This is my OC (original continent! Do not steal!) Pangaea! It’s a fusion of every other continent and is actually secretly the origin of all the others x3
It’s the biggest most powerful continent to every exist but the planet got angry at it and broke it up into lots of little pieces which is where the other continents come from! But it’s okay because Pangaea is clever and has a SECRET PLAN >:3
It’s only PRETENDING to be spreading apart, but really it’s just pushing itself together… in REVERSE!!! And someday it’s going to fuse back together to enter its super form PANGAEA ULTIMA on the other side of the planet and develop the biggest prettiest mountains as all the parts fuse back together!!!
Fan art is appreciated but please no shipping (except you Panthalassa, ilu!!!)
Amasia and Aurica stans DO NOT INTERACT!!!
#is this anything?#yes this was just me getting an intrusive thought about OC=Original Continent and running with it
430 notes
·
View notes
Text
Who's ready to whack me with the this-fool stick I just realized I've been accidently giving myself intrusive thoughts for like two weeks [wheeze]
#knox rambles#YA BOI MAY BE STUPID#me: surely thinking about this oc that has intrusive thoughts she dwells on will not affect me#me 12 days later: ee gads#note to self: maybe dont sit in the mental state of mentally ill ocs every hour of every day if ya aint mentally well urself#MY BAD ON THAT ONE RIP HDHDGDHDJF#HEY GUYS BE MORE SELF AWARE THAN MEHFKFJJFJFKG#y'know this wouldn’t be a problem if i didnt get so emersed in writing ocs but by gods its the only way i know how to write em HDJFJKG#[ad voice] Are YOU giving YOURSELF intrusive thoughts via the content you create/consume? find out now! try self reflection. hindsights a bi
26 notes
·
View notes
Note
Re: your mental health comic - I hope, if any of those characters are based on real hallucinations youve had, that you don't have them anymore. You're a good person who doesn't deserve to be talked to like that.
(Referencing this or this post, I’m not sure which)
Thank you so much for your kind words! The characters in those works are representations of actual hallucinations I’ve experienced. They were real nasty pieces of work, but I haven’t actually hallucinated one in a severe enough manner to talk to them in about… Shoot. Hang on, I need to think… 5-ish years now? I think? And the last time I did, I heard a brief sentence before I took some heavy-duty meds that knocked me out and took care of the hallucination by the time I woke up. I’ve gone through a lot of growth between now and then, and I’m now in a place where the only lasting legacy those losers have had is making me very good at abstract descriptions + personifications and self-reflection. Their cruel words are fuzzy and vague things that I barely remember.
Heck, I went through some old notes to remember some nicknames I gave them, and it was a blast from the past that I actually laughed at! They actually called me “less than worthless” to the point I internalized and verbalized it many times? Wow. That’s pretty cringe, guys. You spent your entire lives bullying a teenager. Cool. Now I love myself and forgot that was ever a mantra I recited at all times in my head.
I once had a project I was working on where I made a fictionalized autobiography set in a fantasy world starring a self-insert and these jokers. It was going to be a kind of field guide to hallucinations I experienced. I stopped working on it after a while because it was too painful for me to develop, as it was meant to dig deep into the pain and struggles I went through on a daily basis… and now I’m looking back at it and considering making it a humorous story about how ridiculous my hallucinations were— at least the ones with consistent personalities. Comedy equals tragedy plus time, truly.
I might end up posting some of the more solemn journal comics I made about these chuckleheads... It'd be weird to dig up my significantly older work, but I think it would do me some good and maybe be enjoyable / educational for others!
#figured i should reiterate this since I'm talking about schizophrenia again:#I won't be offended if anyone has questions they'd like to ask + would gladly answer pretty much everything you guys might be wondering!#anonymous asks are on if you're shy#but it's something i really don't mind talking about :>#heck— i actually can ramble for ages about my experiences if you get me on the right subject!#I always worry that people might be too nervous to ask genuine questions#And my hallucinations honestly usually read more as OCs to me nowadays than the spectral tormentors I once suffered under#i have so many jokes to make about these dopes it's not even funny#anyhoo. *holds up the Orange Boy* this dipstick loves mint chocolate chip ice cream for some reason#*points to the Black Clock* that jerkwad thinks intrusive thoughts are legitimately reflective of one's moral fiber#*points to the Red Woman* that heathen is in brain prison for unsolicited art critiques#*points to self* I put the “hot” in “psychotic”#and with that#it is beddy-bye time for Sofies :)#honk shoo mimimimi#psychosis#schizophrenia#schizophrenic#schizophrenia art#psychosis art#stuff by sofie#sofie answers asks
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
Unlikely places.
Thinking about that headcanon about Sea cookie couples having this 'tradition' about nicknaming each other after the moon and/or sea ever since I watched the mermaid's tale event,,,
#my art#my ocs#cookie run#oc#cookie run kingdom#doodle#cookie run oc#Calamari Pumpkin Cookie#grand madeleine cookie#oc x canon#containing the urge to caption this as;#'she was the moon.he was the sea.can I make this anymore obvious?'#be glad the intrusive thoughts didn't win /lh#also u CAN'T tell me sea cookies don't have storybooks about Seamoon
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
himh I'll make a Dark Urge that's so fucking scared
big scary bloodsoaked killer, tearing through armies with her literal bare hands? nah. a quiet, scared girl who doesn't understand why she does what she does, why she can do what she can, but is, at the same time, deeply disgusted by herself because she has just enough self-awareness to know to be repulsed.
maybe it's because I'm a tiny bit obsessed with clinging to the thought that people, at the end of the day, are fundamentally good, no matter what. that there is a fundamental human goodness in all people that makes them worthy of redemption, or at least of the opportunity for atonement.
maybe the way I want to play a story like that is with someone who, stripped from indoctrination and free for the first time to think for herself and embrace and be who she is, finds that in the deepest, most hidden pits of her soul, she is not the strong, kind, resilient person she might want to be. try as the might, she is not someone who can bear the weight of her own past, she's just a... a terrified, broken little girl, cowering in the shadows and unable to look herself in the eye. (which also gives me ideas for her relationship with Orin but that's a little bit beside the point)
cathartic self-insert who. therapy? what is that. is it on Steam or Epic.
#video games are cheaper than therapy i know from experience#squirrel plays bg3#oc: mara#watching my partner play his durge last night i had Thoughts#so far i'm thinking that this intense fear will be what initially draws my girl to Karlach#because karlach is so.... bright. and exuberant. and even chivalrous in her way#she's so LOUDLY good that her presence is louder than even the fear and... there is something really sweet about that#it'll be a bit of a change of pace for me to REALLY lean into playing a character who... isn't a protector in any way#someone who doesn't put their feelings last#not even out of pure obligation or self-preservation#but rather they are someone who NEEDS comfort and protection#and at the same time IS the danger itself yknow#(my default boys Arvid and Ray are sort of different flavors of a “kinght” archetype)#(the former is the “courage is overcoming fear”-type)#(the latter is the “fate's puppet; thrown at ever-increasing horrors until one finally kills him [and maybe he'll even welcome that]” type)#(Iona may be the most emotionally intelligent but she is in survival mode for a long time which complicates things)#(Petyr is selfish and kinda.... phlegmatic; performatively indifferent until he's yanked from it)#(but Mara will be... feeling ALL of her feelings. and I think Karlach will make her feel the closest to what she can think of as “normal”)#(there's perpetrator guilt. and shame. and fear. disgust at her own urges. intrusive thoughts and bodily reactions that disturb her.)#(i think she'll be pretty fascinating to play)#(holy tag novel dang)
13 notes
·
View notes
Photo
intrusive thoughts
#ocs#killjoye#roger#cai arts#comic#intrusive thoughts#repetitive words#lol sry KJ gave me bad brain worms while i was working on the other comic#so i had to get them out#also rip roger but hey at least this time it didn't actually happen#i can only describe this as KJ giving me second hand intrusive thoughts lmao#ily KJ but i don't really want to be in ur head <3#which. is too bad for me bc they're in my head#i think this took me about 7 hours to do in total
370 notes
·
View notes
Text
CLONETOBER DAY 26: Nightmare 💥
#tw head trauma#tw shooting#john deals with reallyyy horrible nightmares and intrusive thoughts about hurting abe like the original booth SO YK…#clone high#clone high oc#johnny#nerdiotz 2023 clonetober#2023
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
Poll: Intrusive Thoughts
Quick poll. I’m starting to get vivid, flash-forward–type intrusive thoughts again. They’re unpleasant, but manageable, and there’s one qualitative difference from how they used to be: they don’t feel quite as alien.
So I’m curious - to all of your with OCD or intrusive thoughts that otherwise generally interfere with life: Do you get the thing where your intrusive thoughts feel distinctly like they aren’t your thoughts?
RBing for sample size would be really appreciated! Thank you.
#I don’t have ocd but definitely have oc symptoms#My intrusive thoughts are terrifying and they feel like a distinctly separate voice in my inner monologue#OCD#intrusive thoughts#mental health#I’m okay by the way please don’t worry about me
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
enjoying the special dialogue/action options i'm getting for this background
#i didn't choose hack off the hand#because the article i read about this origin said you actually do cut his hand off sjkdflsn#but also rain is resisting the urge as best he can#this will just be intrusive thoughts simulator#fel's bg3#oc: rain
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Frontier Branch Leaders, pt. 3: Drake and Liu Ren
Pt. 1: Background Information
Pt. 2: Sean
Drake
-I stated in an earlier post on this blog that he's 27. Please forget that. He's probably on the cusp of 39 (circa 2015, at the beginning of Frontier).
-Originally from Sweden; moved to Copenhagen a few years before Frontier started.
-Absolutely hates the sensation that occurs when he enters his ancestral battle trance. To him, it's as being possessed, not to mention being utterly exhausting. Starting in his teens, he'd often have periods of abruptly losing control of this trance, and lashing out, sometimes violently, against tormentors and, in worse cases, family. Violet's interest in mysticism allowed her to help him work out what was going on, and slowly learn to detect when a wave of possession was imminent.
-Loves his Ankylo BO because he needn't fear injuring it during one of his trances. He feels most comfortable around padded and armoured vivosaurs.
-For a long time, he tried, desperately, to minimise the length of time he had to spend around children and, by extension, the youngest of the Wardens. He's terrified of hurting people accidentally. Moreover, he finds most people too loud, too much, too extraverted to deal with.
-Has a surprisingly excellent relationship with Sean, who quickly worked out that Drake was intensely sensitive to Sean's typical loudness. As such, Sean usually drops his volume around Drake, and where possible, emails or texts him, instead of talking, on bad days. When Drake's overloaded trying to handle the caseload that comes with managing not only Europe, but also cases in Africa, Sean will often offer to take over some of Drake's more menial duties. Drake, in return, bakes for him, and brings him odd fossil trinkets and weird rocks.
-Despite how much he hates loud people, he loves Scandinavian death metal.
-Known to abuse the World Gate to conveniently escape people. ('Sorry I can't come to your birthday, friend. I'm in Chile right now.')
-Suffered significantly with OCD from childhood, being at his worst in his teens and mid-twenties. He waited for almost 15 years before finally seeking help. While he still has intrusive thoughts and compulsions, they're far better managed now. His social anxiety is also significantly better than it once was.
-Was diagnosed with autism at age 4. Will scream if someone enters his office unexpectedly.
-Has some of the same powers as Violet—however, while she can communicate with spirits and occasionally see the future, he can merely hear spirits and detect psychic energy, but can't actually manipulate them well. Generally, if he can hear his ancestors chattering, he knows his bloodthirsty side is about to take over.
-Blows off frustration by punching pillows. If he punches walls instead, he will leave cracks in the plaster.
-Speaks Swedish and Danish fluently, as well as German and English proficiently. Has a very, very strong accent.
-Visits Switzerland all too often for the sole sake of buying too much Toblerone. Violet can and will raid his supply if there's any left by the time he returns to Fossil Park Europe, so he has about three days to consume everything he buys before she can find him.
-INTP 6w5 sp/sx.
Liu Ren
-Originally from Shanxi. Swears he's forty-eight years old, but Drake and Violet both detect a particular spiritual energy coming from him that's far too immense for him to be a normal forty-something. Writes exclusively in traditional Chinese, never mind that simplified characters have been in use since well before the 80s. Moreover, he's clearly far smarter than he lets on. Violet and Drake are both absolutely certain he's at least a century old, and aren't entirely sure he's human.
-Writes his name as 劉仁, but Violet swears that certain Qing-dynasty documents by 劉陽磊, a mystic and self-proclaimed witch, give off the same energy as Liu Ren's own writings.
-Fluent in Mandarin, Cantonese, six other Chinese dialects, English, and Portuguese.
-Tends to playfully rib Tria for her extremely strong Sichuan accent.
-Consumes obscene amounts of Sprite and Coca-Cola. Nobody knows how his teeth are still intact.
-When other Wardens get injured, he'll tell them to cheer up, and inevitably have a story of a similar injury. As such, he's been poisoned, burned, bruised, and broken over and over. Nobody knows how he's had time to suffer all these abuses, let alone recover.
-Drake and Sean both overtly dislike him. In part, it's that Fossil Park Asia has a longstanding rivalry with Fossil Park America, and that rivalry means that Sean tends to interpret Liu Ren's gestures as patronising, instead of circumspect, and Liu Ren thinks Sean to be green and overconfident. Drake's suspicions about Liu Ren's history remind him of his own supernatural tendencies, leading him to deeply distrust Liu Ren. Stryker is the only one at HQ who isn't concealing some kind of misgivings about Liu Ren, and even then, Stryker is notoriously unwilling to take orders. While Liu Ren has been there far longer than Stryker, and Stryker owes some success to Liu Ren, they exasperate each other.
-He's been in the job for over 25 years, and looked the same then as now. Though few people like him well, he's still impossible to boot from the position, as he's never actually done anything overtly wrong. Fossil Park America claim that he's overpowered and obsolete; Fossil Park Asia claim that he's done more for INTERFOL than Fossil Park America has in the last three decades combined. He's possibly the most experienced person in INTERFOL, and doesn't seem to be running out of momentum; as such, he's invaluable, even if he's incomparably ill-liked.
-Though he's not overtly frayed at the edges in the same way that many, many Wardens are, he can and will go very, very quiet if someone mentions anything to do with Cosmonium, and when he touches the stuff, he claims that it burns. Drake is starting to wonder if Liu Ren's apparent agelessness might have something to do with Cosmonium, and if there may be some awful incident at the heart of what drove him into contact with it.
-Occasionally takes partners for a night, but doesn't appear to be seeking companionship. Has a portrait of a wife in his office, but it's old-fashioned, in black-and-white, and nobody has ever met the woman herself. Mei Lian once worked up the courage to ask her name. Zha Youjing. When Mei Lian looked at the photo of Youjing and called her gorgeous, Liu Ren looked as if he'd seen a ghost.
-ENTP 3w4 sp/so.
#that concludes the ask series for this one! i really enjoyed this so thank you so much!#the idea of drake having ocd came to me thus:#since intrusive thoughts feel like being possessed—are these even my thoughts and where are they coming from and why am i helpless—#then it'd make sense that drake (who gets all but possessed by something buried in his soul) would know that sensation#i don't have ocd but i do have strong oc traits and it's sometimes nice to see yourself reflected in a character#i don't know what's going on with Liu Ren but i love him. so much. he's so weird and he's probably about 150 AT LEAST.#i suspect he and zha youjing had children. liu ren (being immortal) has outlived those children and it breaks him over and over#fossil fighters frontier#fossil fighters#ff liu ren#liu ren#ff drake#drake#カセキホリダー#僕らはカセキホリダー#ff
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Marshlily dreams of the Dark Forest again. The smell of rot fills her nostrils, and she retches, barely holding down the contents of her stomach. She’d dreamt about it every night for moons now, but she still can’t get used to the squelching of mud between her toes, the only sound in the uncannily silent expanse. What did she do to end up here, so far from StarClan?
She takes a few steps forward, but quickly stumbles. The shaking is worse here, rapid jerks that make it difficult to walk—not that trying to run away would save her.
“Is anyone here?” she calls, as she always does; her words are chopped up by the tremors that wrack her body. It’s with a frozen feeling in her stomach that Marshlily realizes that that’s not the only thing cutting her off; in what feels like just seconds, her throat has become clogged with foul-tasting blood. She hacks it up, splattering red on the damp ground, but it just keeps coming, choking her more and more by the second no matter how much she coughs and splutters.
This hasn’t happened before. This is new. Panting between coughs, she stares down at the pool of blood that’s growing on the grass before her. She’s faint, fainter than she should be; it’s not so much a loss of blood that makes the world bleary, but a sort of … a sort of … Marshlily shakes her head, unable to think of some way to describe it but finding herself unable to think of the words.
She digs her claws into the earth to keep herself grounded. Her mind, however, can’t be gathered so easily; the dissolving feeling lingers. I’m all apart, the part of her that remains within in her grasp thinks. Through a mouth of blood, she gives a garbled cry once again: “Is anyone here? Help me!”
After a few moments of silence, Marshlily hangs her head and whines gutturally. Why does she even try anymore? Nobody ever answers …
And then someone does.
A familiar voice echoes in her ears, high-pitched and scratchy: “Marshlily …”
Weakly, Marshlily lifts her head, her ears pricked. “... Hornetstar?” she asks. “Where are you?”
“We care about you, Marshlily.” “We need you, Marshlily.” “Come home, Marshlily.”
Marshlily looks frantically from side to side, looking for Celebi, Crageagle, and—her heavy heart jumps in her chest—Charredtail. “Where are you? Where is everyone? Did you come to rescue me?”
As the voices continue, they begin to sound closer, and with some time, Marshlily can pinpoint the direction they’re from. She takes a wobbly step toward them, but she makes it only a few taillengths before the voices of her loved ones fall quiet and a piercing scream erupts inside her brain. It’s like that alien feeling she’s been having, but worse, overwhelming her senses. There are no words put to it, no way to understand what’s going on, just a desperate yowl.
“Leave me alone!” Marshlily cries. “Let me go!” She sinks to the ground in a heap as the screeching continues and begins to scream herself, wearing her bleeding throat raw. Of course it wouldn’t let her go. Of course her only hope would be a trap. The dissolving feeling, which had dissipated slightly, comes back with a vengeance. She really could just lie there and give in—it’d be a lot less painful …
As soon as she resigns herself to the faintness, though, something cuts through the screaming. It’s faint, but it’s there, and little by little it gets louder until Marshlily can finally hear it clearly: “I love you, Marshlily. I’ll always love you.”
It takes Marshlily a few moments to recognize the voice, but when she does, her breath stops in her chest. “Mom?” she asks, her voice wobbling. “Mom, is that you?” Half-remembered memories float to her head: milk scent; a soft, murmuring voice; the warmth of her siblings snuggled up against her.
The voice doesn’t answer. Instead, it continues, “You have to keep going.”
It’s with uncertaintly that Marshlily gets to her paws, and the screaming in the back of her head never relented, but nonetheless, she does. Her movements are jerky and discoordinated, and she stumbles over her paws more than once, but with nothing else to do, she follows the voices of her loved ones: “It’ll be okay, Marshlily.” “You have to keep trying.” “Just follow my voice …”
She can’t begin to tell how long it takes—it could have been minutes or days; they’re all the same here—but eventually, as Marshlily continues in her unsteady gait, something shifts behind the rotting trees. The air here is always a bit misty, but this is different: a hulking wall of fog hangs ahead of her, condensing in mere seconds as she approaches, as if it were waiting for her.
Tentatively, Marshlily pads through the last few trees ahead of her and into a small clearing. She can see the fog clearly from here; it writhes like something alive, but she doesn’t find herself unsettled by the breath-like undulations. Instead, she’s overwhelmed by a feeling of welcomeness and love. She takes a few steps toward it and realizes something: she can walk straight now. The jerking has stopped, and when she swallows, she finds that there’s no taste of blood in her mouth any longer. She’s thinking clearer, too.
“Come here,” a chorus of voices says, and Marshlily grits her teeth. What if it’s a trap? What if she never gets better? What if she falls right back into the thrall of whatever—whoever—is screaming inside her head?
But then, what other choice does she have …? It’s stay here and dissolve into nothingness or risk the pain of whatever might lie on the other side. With just enough trust to allow the warmth of it, Marshlily braces herself and runs through.
She jolts awake into a world of silence. No, it’s not silent … there’s the birds, the rustling of leaves in the wind, the rushing water of a nearby stream. What’s silent is the inside of her head: no screaming; no vicious, alien thoughts; just her own internal monologue, so much clearer than it has been in moons.
Marshlily takes a few breaths in and out, in and out, then closes her eyes shut. What if this is just a dream? What if this is the Dark Forest playing tricks on her? How can she trust it?
Tentatively, she brings herself to her paws and stares out across the land; she’d run far from the Cavern the night before, but she’s still high enough up that she can see across all four territories from here. There’s PrairieClan’s, out in the tall grass of the moor; that over there is SerpentClan’s, wrapped in the shadows of the forest; and way on the opposite side is MoonClan’s, a mix of warm sand and tall trees. They’ve never looked so beautiful. Surely the Place of No Stars and its denizens could never create a place like this.
“Marshlily!”
The echoing voice comes from somewhere above her, and Marshlily turns to see Hornetstar bounding down the rocks, Hubert, Celebi, and Nettledawn in tow. She slows down as she approaches, her pawsteps becoming (rightfully) tentative, but she doesn’t flinch away in fright, which is more than Marshlily could ask for, really.
“Hi, everyone,” Marshlily croaks, and winces at the ache in her throat. For a brief, panicked moment, she thinks it’s blood that’s making her voice groggy; common sense kicks in when she realizes that the only thing she tastes is stale morning breath. She laughs at herself internally; of course her throat is sore, she’s been sleeping for … “How long was I gone?”
“Days!” Hornetstar says. “You weren’t responding, just flailing around and talking to someone. Were you dreaming about Kestreltail?”
Marshlily can’t keep back a melancholy smile at the sound of her mother’s name. “A little bit.”
“Come on, stop with the chatting,” Hubert says, taking a couple steps toward Marshlily. “How are you feeling? Are you still sick?”
Marshlily thinks on it for a long moment. The violence in her head is gone; she turns to Hornetstar and hears no disembodied urge to attack. She turns to walk a few paces this way and that, and her body doesn’t jerk, or even twitch. “I don’t think so,” she says finally, turning back to the others. “I think I might be okay.”
As soon as the words are out of her mouth, Hornetstar is pressed up against her, purring up a storm. “I was so worried! I thought you were going to … I mean, I was scared that …”
Marshlily chuckles and nuzzles her face into Hornetstar’s shoulder. “You and me both, Hornet,” she says, voice muffled by her thick pelt. “You and me both.”
#warrior cats#wc#clangen#clan generator#wc oc#warriors oc#gc update#marsh#hornet#hubert#behind the scenes: i was so stressed about getting this done on time on such short notice (fully my fault)#(i forgot to brainstorm how this would happen until like literally 3 days ago)#that i had 2 or 3 different emotional breakdowns#and then while writing it i started crying because i got emotional over the 'it's all about love' of it all#so not to be tmi but i guess the lesson to be learned here is to not write when im on my period.#idk if i should tag waterfur here? i tagged her yesterday in the one where she was just intrusive thoughts in marshlily's head#but in this one she's just screaming
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
Motw got canceled for today so have a silly doodle of a drunk john (hes trying his best)
#i think hed be super apologetic but also very openly nice#and maybe a tad more willing to talk about his intrusive/monster thoughts but [shrug]#He doesnt canonically drink and i don't want him to at the moment so yknow#oc art#motw oc#eric finally speaks#pencil sketch#john doe
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thinking tonight about Sunny and the whole contradiction of their nature being a fine-tuned bundle of survival imstincts wrapped around a profound death wish, and how they're currently dating a necromancer who in our current rp saved their life after an accidental overdose by literally swapping hearts with them after they did im fact did for a minute or so. And how they're now hooked on death magic and how that's just a more literal application of their already very much present if shoved to the back of their mind suicidal impulses. Something something love and life and death being far more deeply intertwined than can adequately be described.
#furthermore thinking on how Sunny has been my therapy oc for years and what that says about me#how im healing but still have those intrusive thoughts and the thrill associated with them#idk man idk how to unpick and define it all#i just love Sunny alot and hope i can someday write something cohecive enough#that other people could read it and understand them the way i do
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
( can my brain just stop, please? Like if I get one more intrusive thought telling me I’m annoying everyone and should never bother anyone ever again, while at the same time getting slammed with thoughts of my OC’s that I just want to talk about, I might actually scream )
#[chaos mode]&ooc#my dragon age OC’s are taking over my brain again#but I feel like I’m bothering anyone I talk to#and so I’m not talking about them#even to people i normally talk about them with#and im pretty sure my one friend is just completely sick of me anyway#and part of me knows that’s just the intrusive thoughts talking#bc she told me I could talk to her#but she also has barely talked to me in weeks so it kind of feels like she doesn’t want to#so im just over here#crying#wanting to scream#and wanting to write but not being able to keep my thoughts calm enough to write#plus imposter syndrome#ahhhh
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
herm.
youtube
eddie.....
#i originally didn't think it fit him bc he wouldn't do (most of) those things out of obligation#but. yk it fits his fears of ending up in a hellish afterlife pretty well#after all if GHOSTS exist.. what if devils and angels do too? i mean he believes they do#eddie's pretty... gray when it comes to religious beliefs it's a lot of fear more than anything#but also he's pretty certain he's gonna go to hell when he dies for his inaction and compliance#i'm of the personal opinion that he'd go to purgatory but i'm sure there's an argument to be made about him being heaven worthy#bc. that seems to be the sentiment of the people around me when they find out enough about him :>#i think his cowardice has damned him to misfortune though... he's probably had more than a few opportunities to kill eli/jack#but he treats them less as opportunities and more as intrusive thoughts#i don't think he's capable of killing elijah but. jack? i mean. that IS how jack dies.#oc music time#oc: edgar#edgar in the 80s#religion cw#catholicism cw#Youtube
3 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
inmyarmswrappedin
decade long gay coded mukahi gakuto
mydearsteven
thank you!
leonaluv
Leonaluv
english4allacademy
Untitled
bravo6698
LHP