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#im not gonna tag everyone thats just cruel

todayisafridaynight · 11 months

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I may just be delirious but I kind of feel like there's something there about some of the most traumatic events in Arakawa's life arguably stemming from/being made worse by being loved too much.

Like, Toshio's death, right. The death of a parent is always always going to be traumatic, particularly when your other parent is abusive, but I feel like being there, being the first to the scene, made it so much worse. Especially when it should've been a good memory.

Non-zero chance I'm just projecting because I was there for my own father's death and I was around Arakawa's age at the time, but it's like... it did have very specific life-long effects, didn't it... the way he keeps coming back to Peking duck and talks about it like he's had it before when he can't even bring himself to eat it unless he's with family (and indeed, never did, up until right before he died)...

And then there's his former patriarch. Of course, he seemed to see Arakawa as more of an object--fully under his control and something to be thrown away at the first sign of autonomy. But I feel like, before then, Arakawa must've been his "favorite," if he was willing to arrange a marriage between his daughter and Arakawa. Which I expect is what made his reaction when Arakawa told him he was (technically) having an affair with Akane and wanted out of the family that extreme in going as far as to send men after Akane and Ichiban.

The last one I can immediately think of is not exactly traumatic for him, though it is traumatic For Me so I'm counting it, but it's of course what we were talking about with Jo hesitating so much at the thought of killing Arakawa that he passed up the chance to save him.

I Dunno I Am Delirious but... there's a pattern somewhere in there... Anyway. Uh. "Happy" Father's Day am I right

happy fathers day :]]]]

#snap chats #I HAVE NOTES DOWN HERE AS ALWAYS I PROMISE JUST. no better way to cap off a post with a smile :)#plus yk. i dont have any major notes to add thats not restating but i do enjoy Restating so in the tags we go #also ngl im a lil tired so if im gonna look right silly cause my brains functioning like a bowl of cereal ill do it down here as per usual #totally waited to answer this when its technically fathers day my time and i didnt just stare at a wall #listen if someone has a proejcting problem its me alright. its ok if someone else has a turn at it esp when its within fair grounds 🥴#in any case Yeah.. everyone loves patterns ones a coincidence two's a pattern three should incite murderous intent #i definitely wouldnt call it delirious thinking Thats My Job right LMAO #in all seriousness the importance of at least one positive adult figure in a trouble child's life cannot be understated #im pretty sure i talked bout that already so i wont give the whole lecture again LMAO #in any case its not unreasonable to want to assert love being a theme with arakawa- if not a detriment in some way #it was arakawas intense love for akane that inadvertently fractures their family to be #it was arakawas love for masato that didnt allow him to be harder on him when he should have been and caused both their eventual downfalls #and of course- as mentioned- while not a result of arakawa's own feelings #it was ultimately jo's. //vague hand gesturing// towards arakawa that stopped him from killing him outright #yet jo's love for masato that didnt allow him to lie and go directly behind his back #so yeah love just. works against arakawa unfortunately. an especially sad thing for a troubled child #because as a troubled child that's all you ever really want isnt it- to love and to be loved without worry #so its a cruel irony in that despite arakawa's childhood and general growing-up it didnt stop him from trying to love his family #it makes me wanna throw up (depressed)#in any case i have to stay up a little longer so i can steal water for later SO im gonna be up to uhhhh idk :) Stare At My Wall

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dilutedconfusion · 2 months

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okay listen so i've been thinking heavily on the yandere trope recently. but like with Kid as the yandere. and whenever i see yandere!Kid i feel like he's always the more sadistic version of yanderes.

basically used this post (hoping the link works for you🙏🙏) to look at the dif types bc i dont know all that😭 but i feel like he is always sadistic/possessive in fics. obvi all yandere!aus are gonna be at least a little ooc bc its a divergence of canon characteristics but hear me out girl...

delusional and overprotective yandere!Kid... like girl. or like basically a kinda soft yandere!Kid. but like still horrible and awful not GREAT at emotions. like he will still get mad and yell but otherwise? is strangely kind to you? (w you not really realizing any subtle manipulation tactics that him or Killer might be using cuz Killer is loyal asf to Kid🤞)

like being kidnapped by the Kid pirates, the worst of the worst generation, said to be cruel and sadistic. that's already bad, and you're terrified for your life. essentially having a meltdown because you had no idea what was going to happen to you, but you had a guess. you meet Kid and prepare to be tortured/killed. then he's like??? weirdly nice to you? like yeah he's gruff and kinda bitchy but that is a thousand times better than being killed.

thats as far as the thoughts go but see my vision?? figured you would appreciate the Kid thoughts🙏

OKAY OKAY I love this SOOO MUCH. Like I don’t think I can explain how much I love this but you SLAYED. GIVING ME LINKS AND DETAILED DESCRIPTIONS AND SHIZ 🤭💞 Okay so to get right to the point I will be of course writing a chapter on this (or maybe multiple on this because that’s how good of an idea it is pookie). BUT I don’t know when I’ll be able to churn out a full chapter. I mean probably soon but I sorta just want to get a better grasp of exactly the kind of character you want Kid to be before I start writing. So here’s a little traits list?? that I cooked up the minute I read over this just to get my creative juices flowing. Let me know if Im headed in the right direction and if there is any changes or additions you’d like to see. Other than that I’ll write up the chapter, tag and credit the hell out of you, and we can revel in softyandere!Kid together 🥰

Traits

Thinks that kidnapping you was the best choice for your life. That you will be the safest and happiest with him (even if you’re kidnapped and being held against your will)

Often uses manipulation tactics like love bombing, balant lying to keep you in the dark, and triangulation with Killer

Not only believes that everyone else in the world is a hazard to you (including most of his crew members) but you’re a hazard to yourself so he doesn’t allow you privacy??? This could be taken to the point where he feels like he needs to be in the same room with you at all times. Eyes on you whenever physically possible. Which is sorta intense so just let me know if that is too much for you (cause I could make it really gross or more mild lol)

Will do even the simplest task for you, not because he wants to do it to help, but because he doesn’t believe you can take care of yourself or MOREOVER he should be the only to take care of you because he is just that great. Which of course he will hang over y/n’s head in arguments and be like “BUT LOOK AT HOW MUCH I DO FOR YOU😡” type shit.

If you do constantly try to pull away from him he’ll think you’re just shy or playing hard to get and will therefore push your boundaries harder. But if you actually PHYSICALLY harm him or try to PERMANENTLY leave he’d rather tie you down until you apologize and say you weren’t in your right mind when you did that then listen to your plea seriously (HES SO DELULU) The punishment for this could also involve taking away material items or aspects of freedom because like you said he's not sadistic so he would never hurt you.

To put it simply y/n would feel like this “I like you Kid but I don’t like who you become when you're with me” WHICH WOULD CAUSE SOME SERIOUS TURBULENCE IN THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND SOME SWEET ANGST EVEN.

I would write more but I don’t want to give TO MUCH away plot wise. Sooo hopefully this gives you a good idea on how I’m thinking of portraying Kid. If you have any other questions of course ask me!! Any little tid bits will be much appreciated and thank you so much for requesting something from me Emma 🫶

#alicia answers <3

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anti-katsuki-lounge · 6 months

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yk, it kind of annoys me when people rag on shinso for "coasting through life with his quirk". like, there are plenty of other valid criticisms of his character in canon (though admittedly i love his fanon characterization a lot bc of my own biases) but that one always gets under my skin. because that's,,, something basically every canon character does? if you have a quirk, youre going to use it, and the metric for which people use to identify a character as "relying on their quirk too much" seem inconsistent at best. even our very own main character midoriya starts relying on his quirk for everything basically as soon as he can use it without hurting himself, and we stop getting those fun moments where he gets to show his intelligence and creativity nearly as often as theyre replaced with "who can punch harder" contests.

also people who claim shinso did no physical training before the entrance exam, or before aizawa picked him up. because as far as im aware,,, thats never stated in canon? i think people are assuming that if he did any physical training, he would've automatically gotten into the hero course, but that's just not true. even if he trained as hard as he physically could, its gonna be basically impossible for a 15 year old who doesnt have a quirk that gives them an advantage to win against enough robots to pass... which is the literal point of the test. and before anyone brings up hagakure or ojiro, ojiro has an extra limb which canonically helps with his destructive power (he uses his tail to destroy things his punches/kicks couldnt multiple times) and professional martial arts training that shinso clearly doesnt have based on how he flailed during his fight with midoriya, and hagakure is invisible so she can easily sneak up on the robots and take the time to find their weaknesses without being attacked. clear advantages.

and even if he did absolutely no combat training, that could easily be a result of the whole quirk-centric society brainwashing everyone that their quirk makes them who they are. that they have to rely on it, and use it as their guide on who/what to become. so the fact that people are so quick to chalk it up to stupidity and arrogance, when it could easily be just a teenager who isnt immune to propaganda being bitter (and admittedly cruel, like i said not a fan of his canon characterization) when he tries to do something good with his "evil" quirk and it doesnt work, or hell any number of hundreds of other explanations, annoys me a bit. (i realize this is probably coming off as more of an angry rant than im intending, but im not actually that upset about it, im just trying to communicate my thoughts clearly.) ultimately, i dont think we have enough info on shinso's character to decide things like that, you know? and i dont think its productive to just decide that one interpretation of the very limited information we have on his thoughts and actions is the canon one, and then bash/praise him for that interpretation.

i think that's also why tagging things as OOC isnt really done anymore unless its egregious, because there are so many interpretations of characters that are close enough to canon that that version of them can be argued, and a lot of times the person who holds that interpretation is truly convinced that version in their heads is canon, to the point that anyone saying it isnt is automatically deemed an idiot who can't read. so its easy to say "people should tag more things as OOC", but it takes a lot to be aware that how you read a character may not be what is actually displayed in the text or what the author intended, and a lot of people only think about how they read the story due to their own biases or creativeness or pet peeves, not the literal reading of the text. its especially hard in manga, when drawings of facial expressions can sometimes be argued to display a number of emotions, thoughts, etc.

and that one post where someone said that shinso would die immediately if he had to fight someone with a weapon, when he wasnt trained, and they were genetically physically immune to his quirk?? like, yeah, obviously??? so would anyone! these hypotheticals are meaningless, because you could easily say "well, what is hagakure had to fight someone with a gun who had heat vision on day one, she'd probably die" or any other random character and scenario. it means nothing, especially since shinso was actively training to get into a school where he would be trained to both use his quirk and what to do when he cant use it. just saying "well he wasnt good at fighting before he got in" is a terrible argument. i agree with a lot of the rest of the post, but that one part baffled and irritated me.

I think Hitoshi’s biggest flaw is that the world building around him sucks. Had he been shown to train and still failed and had we actually been showed that he’s been bullied, his anger would’ve been justified or at least understandable/sympathetic. Instead we have… nothing, which makes him seem like he’s throwing a temper tantrum and/or comes off as entitled. On paper, he’s not a bad character whatsoever, and the same goes for Shota. The main issue with both characters comes from how they’re executed and how they mesh with the world they’re in.

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anthroposeen · 23 days

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i finished red valley s2 (literally 30 seconds ago) and i have very swirly, conflicted, and bemused thoughts! this review is just gonna be some loosey goosey simplified thoughts on the season as a whole :)

i really enjoyed the format of the pacing this season, with the perspective switching from the future and aubrey's pov back to the past recordings, i thought it added a nice layer to the way information was revealed. i also just generally thought it was paced really well, especially considering the story is dealing in several time skips.

the character development this season was also delicious- i really didnt expect grace's sorta-redemption arc? and i really liked how aubrey's journey "out" of red valley was sort of a foil to both grace and briony's change in career directions. i also just loved the entirety of aubrey's arc in general, shes become my new favorite character and i think easily the most interesting one (and i hope she doesnt turn out to be another evil mad scientist in s3, i enjoy her as a morally sound grassroots terrorist, thanks).

im ashamed to say that i need briony desperately. "need" can be taken in many directions- as a lab specimen, as a lover, as an enemy, carnally, in a self disgusted manner, in a cage fight, as a medical prescription or psychiatric diagnosis. i simply need her. i love aubrey and i want to sit down with her and have a really long chat. but i want to beat briony's skull in with hammers and eat her entrails with my bare hands and teeth. i needed to confess this to god, to anyone reading these tags, and to whatever cruel power made this woman so perfect for being put in a blender.

as for warren and gordon, who i feel need to be picked apart as a unified entity, holy shit. i mean actually what the fuck is this. so we're just going to go with the fact that warren's brain is being turned to cherry slushie and hes been in hypersleep for 44 fucking years and everytime he re-wakes up he has to wonder why his best friend sounds like siri??? and gordon. gordon who has never gone under hypersleep and had the faulty meds used on him and has been in a cryonics tube for nearly half a century after being shot at close range. ok! ok!!! ok. right. so we just need to accept this and move on and not question it and not worry about it. my threat about killing everyone in the room and then myself upon gordon's demise very much still stands and i am fully prepared to take a leaf out of aubrey's book and approach this issue with a homemade flame thrower. at least waffles is fine (also, that's my cat's name, so thats fun!!)

overall, i really ate this season up and im so very scared to start s3. like actually terrified. but what a wonderfully written and crafted show!!! im losing my mind and going full yellow wallpaper!! congrats to the team behind this!!

#red valley #red valley podcast

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deepfrost-citadel · 3 years

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I make original content, yessir, I am definitely not hopping on bandwagons bc shade had a 1AM idea and now I'm curious-

Hermits (personas) rated by if I fought them obviously this is a joke

Joe- would be repelled by sheer force of Vibe, its not gonna happen T̴͎̊h̷̢̞̋a̶̟͙̽̄̍t̴̔̅͜'̴̜͘̕s̶͖̋ ̶̼́͆̚t̶̟̋͆h̶̳͐e̷̛̤̪͉͝ ̵̫̦͔̿̌́J̶̧̘̖́͒̋o̴̧̯̗̓̔̒ȅ̵̛͙͓̮͘ ̴̻̊̏H̴̳̤̄́̑i̸̧͉̓ͅĺ̷̰͗̋l̸̹̓̕͝s̵̥̥͎̀̀͛ ̴̧̈́͗D̶̡̮̹̍̊̇i̸̯̍͗͠f̸͖͘͠f̶̠̍̈͠ê̷̢̻̟̈́̏r̸̢̐͛͗e̷̥͗ṋ̸͒̂ͅç̶̤͋̕e̸̤̮͛̾/10

Cleo- *chuckles* I'm in danger! 1/10

Jevin- I punch him and my hand goes straight through him. We both stand there in silence for a while. Jevin equips boots and curbstomps me into the dust 1/10 not sure what happened there but it sure did

Impulse- have you seen how many totems this man has? This man cannot die 2/10

Cub- heard i was coming and trapped me in an obsidian box with nothing but a copy of the hermitton herald 2/10 i respect the grind

Welsknight- my self esteem has been shredded like wheat by his sick bars 3/10

Xisuma- would pick me up by the scruff of my neck and ask me if I'm doing ok. I am small and can easily be held at a safe distance, all I would gain is disappointment in myself 3/10

Iskall- supplexes me and I die within seconds 4/10 at least I got a hug out of it

Grian- would probably use his Gremlin Fast Powers to wear me out before properly attacking. And it would work. I am not built for combat or handling a grian 5/10 it'll be fun to watch

Scar- Government? Capitalism? Square up thot this is nothing personal 6/10 I would still get rekt

Zedaph- got trapped in an intro skit I'm not gonna make it 7/10

Tango- would probably find it more funny than anything, foolishly, while he's distracted I steal his kneecaps and- oh wait no I shouldn't have distracted him from ravager wrangling we're both dead 7/10 probably looked funny

Ren- I feel like it'd be a reasonably fair fight until he says something flirty and I completely bluescreen 7/10

Etho- end up trapped in a maze made out of free glass while being harassed by endermites. I don't know how I got here but once I get out I will be fighting Mr. Slab on principle 8/10 odds of survival low but the theatrics are nice

Mumbo- ok I actually stand a reasonable chance here provided that he is A. Not allowed elytra and B. Tall lanky spoon man. He's bad at pvp, I'm bad at pvp and I need to regain some of my lost self esteem, its perfect 9/10

Doc- kills me in one punch and I would thank him for it 10/10

Bdubs- try and get the drop on him while he's asleep bc I would be absolutely shredded to pieces if he knew I was there. Is it cheesing the fight? It sure is but now I have a bdubs head that I can enjoy for the .5 seconds it takes for him to respawn 10/10 i will now be running away

#hermitcraft #im not gonna tag everyone thats just cruel #hey update bc someone somehow found this post again:#I'd rank them all 10/10 bc i am confident i could kill any one of them (in minecraft) within 10 seconds

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justanotherbookortwo · 4 years

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Do you ever start with characters that you dont mind but dont see the appeal in and then end up lowkey hating them because of how the fandom treats them???? Asking for a friend

#theres this one character i dont really like because everyone loves them and they are inescapable #im not gonna tag them tho bc thats just cruel and i feel like id get jumped lmao

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bokebelle · 3 years

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until the end, my love.

WARNINGS: aot ch. 139 spoilers. mentions of grief, angst

PAIRINGS: eren yeager x gn! reader

TAGS: oneshot, angst, canonverse(?) au (idk if this counts as canon divergent)

WORDCOUNT: 1k

A/N: i know im late to the last chapter pain but thats not gonna stop me !!! i was really feeling it when I was writing this i actually cried LMAO but the song i was listening made me sadder than my actual writing so if you wanna be sad with me listen to this song // thank u @lemvis for beta reading and for crying with me ily

Your eyes were closed as you leaned against the tree. it was quiet, save for the sound of the wind gently rustling through leaves. it felt familiar; it felt like home. your mind goes back to the days of your childhood, before the fall of Wall Maria. Days spent crouched over a book while Armin explained what was scrawled on its pages. Sunny mornings walking around in peaceful silence with Mikasa. Quiet afternoons, such as this, laying on the grass with Eren, Mikasa, and Armin, allowing the noises of the world to lull you to sleep for just a moment.

It felt like a lifetime ago, when in reality, it was your everyday life almost 10 years ago. Time in between was a hazy. The three of them joined the Scouts while you chose to stay. You promised you would be there whenever they came back, though you were terrified that there would be a day there would be no one to greet you whenever the Scouts returned. But as fate would have it, they all came back home, sometimes bringing back new friends for you to meet. It was all a blur now. Their return to Shiganshina, Armin talking nonstop about the day he finally saw the ocean, to when they learned about the existence of some place called Marley, it was all a blur in your mind - or maybe it was your mind willing you to forget. In between those years, fate made it so you couldn't forget that you and Eren fell in love. You don't know how you two fell in love, or when it started, but one night, before the three of them had to leave yet again, you clung to Eren and hugged him tightly. You cried into his chest, worried about how maybe one day, they wouldn't come home. He held you tenderly, softly wiping the tears that stained your face. Suddenly, he leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on your lips - a promise that he would come home to you no matter what it took. It was a promise he never broke. Each time he came home, he gave you two kisses: one because he loved you, another as a promise that he'd come home to you time and time again.

You took a deep breath, letting the crisp air fill your lungs. Times would change, plants would wither and new ones would bloom, but your love for Eren throughout the days stayed the same. You couldn't stop the bitter tears that stung your eyes when you remembered that while your love was set in stone, the only piece of Eren you had left was a stone with his name engraved on it, a painful reminder of the boy who sought freedom, the boy your love belonged to. a place of rest for him, and a place of mourning for those who remembered him.

The grief in your heart had mellowed, but you couldn't deny the familiar ache when you think about the boy that could have been yours. You never got over your grief, and you accepted that you never would. Instead your heart grew around it, changing its shape to feel whole again even with grief taking up the place left broken by fate and her cruel ways. Your heart was left broken, but its jagged edges dulled over time. Though some days they cut you deeper than you had thought, leaving you broken and in pain, you learned how to get up and move on, nursing the pain until it went away.

"Eren, everyone will be coming to visit you soon. Aren't you happy?" you whisper, letting the wind carry your voice to where you hoped Eren would be able to hear. You kept your eyes closed, willing the tears that were threatening to spill to remain at bay. It felt like one of those days from what felt like another life. You could almost trick yourself into believing that Eren was asleep right next you, right where the stone that bore his name laid. You could almost convince yourself that the reason you kept your voice low was so you wouldn’t wake him up. You could almost convince yourself that when you open your eyes, he would be there, that Eren was finally home, and that he was here to stay. Almost.

The truth was, you were afraid to open your eyes, knowing there was nothing left of the boy you loved except the memories you shared and the half of a heart that still seemed to beat. The truth was you wanted to scream, you wanted to shout, you wanted to cry to the world. You wanted to do anything that would wake Eren up. Anything that would make him place two kisses instead of one of your lips, wipe away your tears, and assure you that it was all a bad dream and that life with him was reality. You took a deep breath and did your best to swallow the lump that formed in your throat. As long as your heart beat for Eren, you would always grieve for him. Your grief wouldn’t come in angry cries or bitter tears. Your grief would come in a promise to live a free life, the way Eren would have wanted. It would come in afternoons by the tree of your childhood, staying a bit longer on days your heart looked for the green eyed boy who always sat by your side. Your grief would come thinking about what life could have been if Eren came home.

It was young love. maybe a bit naïve, a little hopeful, but it was real. Yours was a love that was reckless and passionate. A love that kept you warm on cold winter nights and kissed your skin during bright summer days. If your love was a person, it was Eren. The person you shared it with was the embodiment of the love you felt. It was a once in a lifetime love, with a once in a lifetime boy. But the problem with lifetimes is sometimes one lifetime didn't match the other. And while it could be said Eren spent his life loving you, you were faced with the bittersweet reality that while you would spend the rest of yours missing him, you would forever be thankful that fate made it so that you love and were loved by Eren.

tagging: @onwiings @wxstoria @crapimahuman @novasblogs @hannie2kay @tanakaslastbraincell @toji-dabi-wife @lazyezstudy @ereh-simp @dukina @enby-bpd @oblxvion @bakugohoex @6oldie @leviverse

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gryphsdeadbones · 4 years

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hey from one nd person to another the comic where fm gordon says a slur seems kind of in poor taste. ik ur not intentionally making light of it and tht occurring in fm should be criticized but while you dont make it out to be a good thing making jokes about it and calling him a "slurboy" is kind of questionable? it makes it seem more like a plotpoint and angst rather than the creator of fm genuinely fucking up in the past (and having moved on from it)! i think exploring fm coming to terms with being nd is a good idea but this isnt the best way to do it. if you want me to explain my point more lmk if/when u post this and i will! someone already made a post abt it but it was kinda strongly worded and i wanted to approach you more calmly because i genuinely dont want to call you out or start drama or anything ;-;

first off thank you for being civil and patient with me i appreciate this ask a lot- also this got long- im not in a flying rage or anything when i bold or emphasis text, i just needed it also for my own readability and since im not the best at wording- hopefully this hellsite works and my response is under the cut

i would like to know how is it in poor taste when freemind explicitly gets clocked at the very end for saying it. the entire point of the comic was to show that saying the r slur has existed in his source and is bad

im not sure how much more direct i can get, with the disclaimer/warning list growing longer and longer and out there for a huge sign that says “this au can get dark as fuck and these subject matters are treated seriously/not something to mess around with.” Like yes, there are some jokes in the asks and other comics, but that specific comic is not supposed to be “haha thats funny”. it has a serious tone using a rough sketch style bc i was super tired and wanted to vent

was it just the direct reference to it that just made people uncomfortable? because thats 100% understandable, and i made sure i tagged it appropriately (although admittedly, a little bit late since i thought the filter would catch at least the main thing)

i think what some people somehow got from it is “exploring sensitive content = endorsing said content” which! that is not the intent! i absolutely do not want people saying that word! I don’t want people thinking that is any way okay for this character to say

its more of a damned if i do address it, damned if i dont.

if it never comes up, people are gonna assume that ‘oh this character says slurs and is shit, surely the creator or fan-creator MUST be okay with it and woobifies freemind and absolves him of any mistakes’ or something like that. no. this asshole has an arc and i want to do it right. its serious and i think it shouldn’t be shoved under the rug

and people just. dont want to read for context for whatever reason. theyll start watching it and get taken aback by the slur and start blaming me ‘hey you never warned for this’ when very early on i keep mentioning over and over ‘you dont have to watch it if you dont want to! This has slurs and 2000s internet brand humor/style’ You really dont, I’m not forcing you to watch it- Literally all you need to know is either canon half life or hl/vrai. thats it. fm mostly follows hl1 with very slight changes.

so i had to make something that:

1. warns people who arent aware and dont want to go through my asks or about/warning pages (for whatever reason) and just want to see the art

2. also NOT downplay freemind’s canon assholery. listen, i kinda despise writing mean and cruel characters, theyre hard to do, and a lot of people get shit for doing it wrong or people going “character = author”

i’ve also considered leaving the bubbles blank, but then people could fill it with whatever they want, then blame me for being vague. or they’d fill it in with a different kind of slur that freemind has never used, even if he MIGHT be the type to do that. I needed to explicitly mention that it is ableist slur. There are shitty racist and other problematic jokes, but never those kinds of extreme racial slurs to my knowledge.

Although I do see your point that maybe joking about it outside of the serious stuff might not be the best route. The slurboy jokes are getting stale, and I will try a better way to remind people.

The thing that gets to me is that it feels people are more than ready to defend either Ross Scott or Gordon Freeman the fictonal character himself. I don’t??? really care for Ross Scott, so I don’t know if he’s ever brought it up specifically. I’m not really calling him out or cancelling him. Idc for some white man’s feelings, im only bringing the timeframe of That era and reworking it to fit in This current era.

And I hate to break it to people: Gordon Freeman is a blank slate character, you can project whatever the hell you want on him as long as it’s not freakshit illegal garbage. The machinimas (fm, hl/vrai) do have SOME characterization that I want to nail down. It fucking sucks when characters are ooc, and I’m trying not to do that, even if it means sacrificing some comfort. But still mostly staying in my comfort zone if that makes sense

Now about the callout that I do not want to engage with the op directly:

Honestly im very surprised the comic was called out when i just. thought my stuff is relatively tame on exploring the bad shit canon freemind does. ive seen him in fancontent where they really dont hold back and its still played off as ‘kinda funny’ tone.

I really don’t know if people just want any reason to hate me for whatever reason. That’s fine I guess, I can’t please everyone and they dont have to like me.

But like. isn’t it so much easier for the op of that to block me and the post and move on. Why kick up such a fuss. I can see that thinly veiled death threat of a vague. That’s pretty fucked up- Like holy fucking god, you do not have to like my stuff. I’m not holding you at knifepoint to like my stuff. I’ve specifically made two different tags (one general au, one specific au) if anyone wants to blacklist it for their own reasons I do not need to know. I don’t want to know.

You’re allowed to be uncomfortable. You’re allowed to unfollow/blacklist/block.

However you just don’t go ranting about it for something you horribly misinterpreted. If it bothers you so badly, literally just. drop me a message to clarify. thats it. or save yourself the time and block me.

I’ve blocked the op for both our sakes, but if anyone wants to send this post to them, then thats fine. I don’t want anything to do with them.

I don’t want to link the post and blow it up. I just want shit clarified, dropped and we can move the fuck on with our lives.

If you’re reading this and don’t know what the post is, please don’t bother. I do not want people going after the op with threats, please keep it civil, I’d prefer if you don’t engage with the post at all on my behalf.

Despite this huge wall of text, I do not want this to be a big deal, so please don’t ask me about the details.

As for anon, feel free to dm me either on here or. Maybe on discord if you’d still like to suggest or have something more cleared up. I’m still willing to hear any kind of feedback, and i want to thank you again for being reasonable about this

#Anonymous #ask #jdb faq #ask to tag #long post

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latetaektalk · 3 years

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tag games

tagging : @cosmoguk @jtrbluv @yeojaa @opaljm @sleepyjhs @gyukult @jentwt @cafemiya @masterninjacow @gamerkooks and everyone else that has tagged me

tag game one : fic writers ask game

tagged by : @luvdsc thanks cat! this is super fun ✨

Which new trope would you like to try writing?

ex-friends-to-lovers!! in general i love any ex type of tropes!! a heist! au would be fun too

Which trope do you want to write again?

exes! like, i genuinely love that trope so much and feel like theres not enough out there!

Which draft are you most excited to post?

i dont write multiple stories at the same time, so the newest chapter of love to hate you

Is there any new genre you want to explore?

hm i guess fluff? i kinda write angst by default because i think fluff is kinda... boring and not dramatic enough, so i guess i wanna try out fluff!

Do you have a favorite line in any of your drafts up to now?

“Can’t you at least pretend like you think I’m funny?”

“Yeah, that costs extra.”

“And you scolded Jisoo for exploiting me,” Jungkook bit back.

“Well, you said you’re all mine to exploit, didn’t you?” you hummed, scrunching your nose. “You are my boyfriend after all, right?”

Jungkook stared at you, blinked three times before tilted his head to the side and tongued his cheek, defeat.

“Touché.”

Have you decided on any creative goals for 2021?

not really! i just try to write, have fun and improve honestly!

Describe your journey on this blog last year in three words! And three more words for what you hope for 2021!

2020: growth, friendships, fun

2021: growth, friendships, fun (dont really wanna change anything! im having fun!)

tag game two : 10 songs, 10 people

rules : you can tell a lot about a person from the type of music they listen to. put your favorite playlist on shuffle and list the first ten songs. then tag ten people. no skipping!

playlist chosen : love to hate you

kiss me - sixpence none the richer

anything you want - jawny

can i call you tonight? - dayglow

heartbreak in a box - juice

daydreaming - marc wavy

lover boy - phum viphurit

let’s fall in love for tonight - finneas

dontmakemefallinlove - cuco

strangers in a dream - phum viphurit

afterglow - taylor swift

tag game three : interview

rules : answer questions and tag 20 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better!

tagged by : @lcksndkys thank you so much! these are a ton of fun ✨

name/nickname : linh

pronouns : she/her

star sign : scorpio

height : around 170 cm or 5′7

time currently : 10:30 pm

when is your birthday : nov 9th

favorite band/groups : exo, red velvet, bts, nct, superm, blackpink, twice

favorite solo artist : taylor swift, olivia rodrigo, harry styles, finneas

song stuck in your head : gone by rose

last movie you watched : get smart, i think

last show you binged : taskmaster

when you created your (main) blog : like april 2019 maybe?

last thing you googled : how many seconds in a year

other blogs : this and my recs blog

why i chose my url : like late night talk, so i turned the night into taek because of taehyung, baekhyun and taeyong afdfsa

how many people are you following : 305

how many followers do you have : around 1.7k

average hours of sleep : uh not much? idk online class is kinda killing my sleep schedule

lucky number : 7

instruments : piano

dream job : dont know, but something that i enjoy and make good money at?

dream trip : vietnam, china, south korea, japan, england, france, netherlands

favorite food : potatoes, salmon, dim sum

nationality : chinese

favorite song : cruel summer by taylor swift,, its literally my most played song of 2020

top three fictional universes you’d like to live in : marvel, atla, we bare bears

tag game four : this or that

indoor plants or gardens // cloud-watching or star-gazing // water or fire // paperback or hardcover // running or hiking // sleeping with socks or without socks // fruit or vegetables // hanging plants or succulents // dark wood or light wood // handwritten or typed // instagram or pinterest // braids or pigtails // dc or marvel // books or movies // oceans or meadows // forests or fields // sweet or salty // ice cream or chocolate // hoodies or sweaters // long hair or short hair // piercings or tattoos // summer or winter // boots or sneakers // cars or motorcycles // curls or straight hair // castles or cottages // sunny days or storms // reptiles or birds // disney or nickelodeon // strawberries or watermelon // essays or posters // phones or laptops // glass or stone // dark or light // photos or paintings // circuses or theatres // reading or writing // dogs or cats // poetry or novels // monsters or ghosts // thrift shops or libraries // fiction or non-fiction

tag game five : ten biases tag

rules : write down your top 10 biases and answer the following questions

seulgi

baekhyun

taehyung

joohyun

jungkook

jennie

chaeyoung

nayeon

mark

jongin

1. between 1 and 4 who would you rather kiss?

uhm cant i just kiss both? i could never choose between the two sadfsd

2. between 2 and 7 who would be your best friend?

chaeyoung because she speaks english but also because i feel like she and i would hit it off better

3. between 5 and 10 who has the better voice?

love jongin and his voice, but yeah jungkook

4. between 1 and 8 who is the funniest?

ohh thats hard, but i think its nayeon adsfas

5. between 6 and 9 who would you date?

jennie. if i have the chance to date kim fucking jennie, im dating kim fucking jennie. bye mark im not even sorry

6. between 9 and 10, who would you do a collaboration with?

mark! i feel like working with him would be so funny because he just talks and talks and talks asdfdas

7. between 4 and 8 who is the best dancer?

joohyun!

8. between 3 and 5 who would you most likely marry?

uhm uhm uhm- i think im gonna go with taehyung? mainly because of yeontan asdadsf

9. between 1 and 7 who would you nurse when they are sick?

seulgi no fucking question asdfsd like sorry, bestie chaeyoung, but seulgi just owns my heart :((

10. between 2 and 3 who has the better smile?

i dont think this is fair at all?? because both have such gorgeous smiles?? im not choosing asdfs

11. between 6 and 8 who would you vacation with?

jennie! feel llike she would pay for everything and kinda spoil me,, also feel like she would want to do the craziest shit

#linh.tagged

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notkodanymorebye · 4 years

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bonsoir ! my name is sam, its 5:30 am as im writing this, and im a mess. i use she/her pronouns and im from aus – hence the being up at 5:30am for opening and still being late smh. i have a habit of rambling so sorry for this intro in advance lmao. but thats more than enough about me, let’s talk about the other and more important mess, reed’s token aries: K O D A R E I D

tws: mentions of divorce, drugs, and ya know the murders

STATS.

full name: dakota reid

best known as: koda

age: twenty five

gender + pronouns: non-binary, they/them

occupation: waiter/bartender at salvatore’s steakhouse, aspiring podcaster

hometown: reed, virginia

star sign: aries

traits: jovial, creative, adventurous, confident, detached, cruel, impulsive, lazy

drink / smoke / drugs: yes / yes / yes

MORE INFO.

born and raised in reed, they’ve honestly left the area maybe a handful of times. not for a lack of wanting to, they certainly have wanted to and still want to, just a lack of money and time and motivation to plan anything “””big”””” (leaving ur town is not big but koda is lazy) in their lives

im gonna try not to get too into it bc i will go on forever but two important things to mention as far as their childhood. the first, when koda was sixteen their parents went through a really fuckin rough divorce. and like any sixteen yr old whose parents are getting divorced it pissed koda off. they have a moderately better relationship with them now but at the time, it was messy. at first, koda was very outwardly emotional about it, but as their emotions were just used as a weapon for their parents to use against one another they shut that shit down immediately. only showed their emotions in a way that was more of a nuisance to their parents: graffiti, petty shoplifting, being a dickhead in school, flunking grades (though they werent great to begin with), sneaking out all the time, all that bs

which leads to thing two: koda was a dealer towards the end of high school/the start of young adulthood. nothing big, bc they were a dumbass teenager in a small town just looking to piss their parents off. but because they were a dumbass teenager in a small town i assume theres a good possibility that if ur character is from reed: koda was their dealer. eventually they stopped bc people figured out they were just a sometimes v annoying middle man for the much easier to deal with guy that koda bought from + too much work. like most things to koda, drugs were meant to be just a fun past time, not a full time career.

after barely finishing high school they had absolutely no want to go to college. even at local reed college it was a lot of money to put down and for what???? for koda to do an arts degree they dont really care about and then do nothing with it ????? instead they just worked more. they’ve had the job at salvatore’s since they were fifteen and its really a staple in their lives.

when they are not at salvatore’s, they’re still being a menace tbh that did not end with high school or even the dealing. they’re usually skating around (would also be driving around and sometimes they are but its illegal because they recently had their licence suspended), probably spray painting some fence, maybe takin some photos on their barely working dslr, partying, drinking, stealing shopping carts from the local grocer, being a dickhead, u know the ~usual

despite being the local, so far they’ve not had any close connections to the parkway victims and thats unfortunately made them pretty insensitive about it. they’re far, far more interested in figuring out what the fuck is going on than they care about u know the loss of life and danger to everyone else in the town. in stats i mentioned they were an aspiring podcaster and thats because, u guessed it, koda wants to start a podcast about the murders they’re a piece of shit we already know this

and since this isn’t showing in the tags anyways: here’s a link to their pinterest board

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

housemates – koda is a broke mf, i want this connection to be with other broke mfs that are leasing a shitty house and probably have one too many people in it, but like: it works yk

childhood friends – obv koda has lived in reed their whole life, they’re from a very working class family, can be a connection through family or just through school im down for whatever

actual friends – this is probably gonna be limited to like a couple bc koda is so closed off lmao. while they’re friendly and enthuastic with just about everyone, theres not many koda actually considers genuine friends, these are the exceptions

co-workers – koda is confirmed annoying most of the time but they are at their peak annoying at work so if anyone else works at salvatore’s a. im so sorry b. lmk lets plot

party people – do u do drugs and other reckless impulsive bs at house parties? then this might be the connection for u bih – bonus if they’ve been partying together for fuckin ever

an easy thing – literally just the song easy thing by dom ferra. an easy romance, very much in its early stages, prob not official at this point, kinda learning what being in a relationship should mean together. only open to f/nb sorry lads

then just everything idk i need to start getting ready for work but pls hmu if u would like to plot ✌️

#parkway.intro #( about. )

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spootiliousrps · 4 years

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Wolfstar Charms

You both like sirius/remus.

Stranger: [6th year, Remus hasn't told his friends about the werewolf gig yet.] Hey, so. I heard you talking to McKinnon after Magical Creatures today. Is that how you really feel about werewolves and vampires? Marlene was saying some pretty hard shit.-R

You: Well, I don't know what was said, but yeah. I mean, they attack anyone that gets close enough and spread their condition like a disease. They're better off where they can be kept an eye on that let loose in the world. -S

Stranger: But like. Every werewolf? -R

Stranger: And they only turn one night every month -R

You: But how can you be sure? I mean maybe not constantly but at least as their cycle gets closer. You heard what the professor said, they're practically monsters. I would feel safer if something was done about them. I'm not saying to kill them but something should be done. Even if its requiring them to be locked up during that time. -S

You: Why are you so curious about this anyways? -S

Stranger: I don't know. I just think it's wrong to prosecute an entire race of people, some of which may have done nothing wrong. -R

Stranger: There's bad ones, sure, but like. Thats not everyone. Just like not every pure blood is evil. -R

Stranger: Should we round up all of you lot and lock you up? -R

Stranger: I--fuck, I'm usually more eloquent about this, I'm just tired. -R

You: Whoa! Hey! That is not the same thing! I'm not saying to enslave them or anything like that! Locking them up during a transformation is humane! It would be for the protection of both them and the people around them. I know its not their fault. I'm not an idiot. -S

Stranger: It's inhumane to lock anyone up. -R

You: [Delay] Yeah... you usually are lol. I'm not use to seeing you so riled up. Whats got you so tired. -S

Stranger: Like -- would you want to lock me up for the week before the full moon if I was a werewolf or something? -R

Stranger: You said they're basically monsters -R

Stranger: Nothing, it's nothing. I just didn't sleep well, okay? -R

You: They are. Basically monsters I mean... but that doesn't make the people they infect monsters. I mean... the beast that comes out at night is not the person they are the rest of the time yeah?-S I mean, I never really considered it but... Would you have a better idea? Look at it from the person's point of view. You heard about the wizard that woke up after a cycle to find he had slaughtered his whole family? Sure, it sounds cruel when you explain it like that but they guy ended up offing himself cuz he couldn't live with what he had done. If I were a werewolf I'd want to be locked up during my cycle to protect you guys. I mean, I wouldn't know what I'd do if I hurt one of you. -S Maybe you should talk to one of the Ravenclaws, they might be able to slip you something to help sleep a bit better. A charm or something? -S

Stranger: I'm sure the werewolves that actually care take proper precautions. -R

Stranger: There was that one, sure, but. -R

Stranger: All the wolves in the media are all those nasty ones, that just was to cause mayhem. They should be punished for their crimes sure, but you can't control an entire race, that's not right

Stranger: I know plenty of charms. -R

You: Listen, Remus. I'm not going to pretend like I know why you have such a hard on for werewolves' rights suddenly and I'm also not going to pretend like I know everything. You asked and I told you. If you have a better idea for dealing with them then great. As far as I'm concerned it doesn't really involve me and its not like I'm going to write a strongly worded letter to the Minister to try and convince him of anything. Regardless of how either of us feels if a werewolf attacks us in the middle of the night I'm not going to be too torn up for defending myself. -S

Stranger: ..right. Sure. -R

Stranger: I'm going to go nap in Pomfrey's office. -R

You: Probably for the best. Want me to come fetch you for lunch? -S You're even worse when you don't eat. -S

Stranger: Um -R

Stranger: Maybe, I don't know. -R

Stranger: I can ask Peter to bring me something -R

You: [Delayed] If you're sure. Let me know if you change your mind. I promised James I'd meet him on the pitch before third so I won't be doing much. -S

Stranger: you'll be late for transfig -R

You: Wouldn't be the first time. -S

Stranger: Gonny's gonna murder you -R

You: I'd like to see them try. Besides, Lily is suppose to be there too. No one ever gets on to her. -S

Stranger: well.. I hope you guys have a nice time. -R

You: It'd be nicer if you would join us. -S

Stranger: um -R

Stranger: I can see if I can grab some coffee. -R

You: Awesome! I'll swing by the kitchens and bribe one of the house elves for those sweets you like so much. -S

Stranger: sure, yeah. -R

Stranger: I'll see you on the pitch then. -R

You: [[Switch to para?]]

Stranger: [[sure!!]

Stranger: [[I can start]]

You: [[Sounds good]]

Stranger: Every bone in his body hurt before the full moon. Every movement was filled with pain, and the entire week of the moon he felt like he wanted to crawl out of his skin. And he would've, if it meant that it'd stop. Remus dragged a hand through his hair as he made the hike down the hill from the castle to the quidditch pitch, slipping onto the field without being seen. James and Lily were already there, talking quit close together over on the edge of the field. He raised a hand to offer a hello, a grimace on his face with each movement.

You: "Remus!" Sirius called from Remus' right. He was still a few yards away an bulging cloth tucked under his right arm, a few pastries peaking out from beneath it. His left was tugging on a Peter's elbow as the other boy seemed to shift his gaze this way and that as if worried they'd be caught and taken to the dungeon's at any moment. "There you are! I was worried I might have to go to Pomfry's office after al-" he cut himself off as he drew up close enough to make out the boy's expression. "Christ, you look like shite. You weren't kidding earlier were you?"

Stranger: It wasn't fun, being woken up in the middle of the night with agonizing pain. He glanced over to Sirius as he came over to him, and he offered a small smile. "Yeah, I uh, rallied. I have my coffee in my bag so, hopefully that'll get me through potions later." Hey sighed. He nodded to Peter, and glanced back over at Lily and James. "It's fine though. Like I said, I just. Didn't really sleep." he had bags under his eyes, his face a little sunken in. "Whatcha got there?"

You: Sirius glanced down at the bundle as if he had forgotten about it entirely. "Oh, right!"

You: [sorry wasn't done]

Stranger: [nw]

You: Sirius glanced down at the bundle as if he had forgotten about it entirely. "Oh, right! I told you I was gonna swing by the kitchens. Swung by the potion's classroom too," he added with a wink and a grin. "Got a surprise for ya." "I-I had n-nothing to do with it," Peter rushed as if that would save him any grief should they be caught. Sirius just rolled his eyes and pulled him onward as he headed for James and Lily, obviously expecting Remus to follow. "Snatched a few Wideeye potions from the stores while Slughorn was distracted," Sirius admitted, still grinning proudly.

Stranger: Remus laughed softly, shaking his head as he followed them over towards James and Lily. "You're gonna get caught one day, you know?" he said teasingly. "I'd be nervous if Slughorn's rage came down on me, man. He's old but I can tell he's gotta temper." He stifled a yawn into his arm, and let out a puff of air. "I have so much course work to get done tonight." He frowned.

Stranger: [hey im jumping in the shower rq I'll be like. less than ten minutes]

You: "Well my luck hasn't run out yet," Sirius teased lightly. "Oi! James! Stop making pillow eyes at Lilly and get a move on!" Sirius called out to his friend with a laugh before focusing back on Remus. "Luckily for you, of course. Otherwise who would be here to pick you up when you need it ah? Peter?" he teased, elbowing the chubby boy in the ribs. "I-I... T-thats not..." "Relax Peter. I'm only teasing, lighten up."

You: [[Take your time. If we get disconnected I'll be under the tag spootilious]]

Stranger: [back! just gotta get like dried off[

You: [[wb]]

Stranger: Remus watched Sirius for a moment, shaking his head. "Maybe James?" he offered, snorting softly. As they approached, James flipped Sirius off, focusing back on Lily for a moment. "--Did we skip Transfigurations just to watch you talk to some lass?"

You: "No offense, Lilly," Sirius added as if as an after thought. He was a brave and reckless boy sure but he knew better than to piss off a woman, especially on that was such a talented witch. "You could do better than this sod," he teased lightly practically jumping into James' lap and ruffling his hair.

Stranger: "Yes, absolutely no offense," Remus agreed, nodding. Lily just let out a soft laugh. "Of course. Why'd we all come out here, James, did you want to go show off on that broom of yours?" she prodded at his side. Remus sat down heavily, a small grunt escaping him with the hard movement.

You: Sirius's gaze followed Remus' movements and despite his outward jovial appearance, worry lined his eyes. Typically he would have wrestled with James a bit, mock flirting with him, but as it was he allowed the other boy to shove him from his lap, depositing him next to Remus with a grunt of his own. "Rude," Sirius mock pouted but shifted back a bit to give himself room. He laid out the cloth, sweets still piled in the middle. Without hesitation he took two from the top and offered one out to Remus before shoving the other in his mouth.

Stranger: He didn't even want to know how completely like shit he must look like. And tomorrow, he would be concealing his bruised and battered body just like he did every day after a full moon. He glanced over at Sirius as he laid out the pile of sweets and pastries. He smiled, softly, and took the offered treat. "Thanks," he said softly, taking a bite. He let out a long sigh, and leaned his head on the man's shoulder, puffing out a breath.

You: Sirius tried to be as still as possible for the other man, only moving to reach into his robes and produce the small vile of wideeye potion he promised. Peter sank down next to the two reaching for a few sweets of his own. He may have refused to admit his part in the thievery, but he had no quarrel about partaking in the spoils. Sirius wouldn't admit it but his anxiety regarding Remus odd behavior had skyrocketed upon the sight of him and wasn't getting any better.

Stranger: Remus offered a small smile, and took the vial from the man. He twirled it in between his fingers, he uncorked it, and grimaced for a moment before he took it like a firewhiskey shot, closing his eyes tight and shuddering. "Oh, that's so gross."

Stranger: [brb!]

You: Sirius couldn't help but chuckle at the words. "I've caught you snogging Prevel Martin. I'm sure it can't be worse than that!" he countered making the group laugh, though his own didn't quite reach his eyes. They were still pinned to Remus, dark and calculating, as he tried to piece together the puzzle before him.

Stranger: "That was a dare!" he cried, elbowing him in the side. He could feel the effects of the potion almost instantly, though he was still full of his aches. He could feel how tired his eyes were, but the potion buzzed away inside of him and kept the open. His eyes flickered over and met Sirius's gaze, and he let out a puff of breath. "What, were you just upset it wasn't you?"

You: Sirius tensed in surprise at the sudden retort, forcing his grin wider to try and hide the blush. "Oh, yeah. I've always dreamed of snogging that ugly mug of yours," he teased. "Sounds more like a nightmare," Peter added around a mouth full of food. Sirius just laughed harder.

Stranger: Remus snorted softly and grabbed another pastry, kicking his boot out towards Peter playfully. "Aye, just you wait, bastards. Give me a year or two and I'll be taller than James."

You: "Pfft, not likely," Sirius scoffed playfully before turning towards James. "I'm suppose to be in transfiguration right now. Whats up? Or did you just want to bore us again with another one of your rants about Muggle studies again?"

Stranger: Remus scrunched his nose up and rolled his eyes, before he snuck another treat, eyes turning to James. "Yeah, what is it?" James looked affronted and scoffed. "What, a guy can't just ask his mates and-- his uh. non-mate." a glance to Lily. "To come and hang out and skip class?"

You: Sirius snorted at that. "Sure you can, but I think I rather be learning how to turn into a dragon than to have to stare at your ugly mug," he replied, sticking out his tongue. "You can't transfigure into a dragon," Peter commented absently reaching for another treat. "Says you! I bet I could turn into Norwegian Ridgeback by the end of the year if I wasn't skipping class!" he grinned, pointedly looking at James and knowing full well it wasn't the truth.

Stranger: Remus quirked a brow at him. "Actually, not possible. Not a dragon, at least," he nodded. He glanced towards James. "What was that thing we were reading last week? Animagus?" he questioned. "You can turn into an animal, but like. I think it has to be within a certain size."

You: "A baby dragon then," Sirius shrugged before James could answer. "Enough to breath fire and do some damage at least." "Yeah and probably shit everywhere," James laughed. "Good, another job for Finch and his cat," Sirius laughed.

You: *Filch

Stranger: Remus laughed, but it sounded distant even to himself. James looked over at the other lads and quirked a brow. "Shit aren't they covering Wolves and shit in Creatures today? What if you could turn into one of them?"

You: Sirius' smile faded a bit at the question. What was with all this talk about wolves? "I dunno, wolves are just vicious dogs right? I think I would rather be a regular one. Lounge about all day, get fat on treats, swarmed by women all the time." "Sniffing butts," James added with an arched brow. "Hey, don't knock it 'til you try it," Sirius countered.

Stranger: James laughed loudly. "But no, like, hear me out. You could scare the fuck out of any of your friends, if you like. Showed up at their house as a massive fucking wolf. Like would you shit yourself right there?"

You: "I dunno," Sirius continued. "I still think a dragon would be better. What do you think Remus?" he asked turning towards his best friend.

Stranger: Remus blinked a couple of times, and forced another laugh from himself. "Uh. Maybe a rabbit," he said lamely, clearing his throat. He ran a hand through his hair, and he suddenly did not feel very great at all, his stomach churning uneasily.

You: Sirius hesitated as he watched the color begin to drain from his friend's skin. "Don't rabbits mate like crazy?" he asked trying to hide his concern. "I always knew you had a promiscuous side," he teased. "Either way, it won't matter what we want to turn into if we don't learn how," he pointed out, pushing to his feet.

Stranger: The man cleared his throat, letting out a long breathe and tried to stop the queasy feeling. Almost as bad as the bone and joint aches, he hates the nausea that comes along with it, as the full moon ticked closer and closer. "James could probably find the book with the animagus spell in it." he murmured. "I uh. I have a ton of homework to do, and I have a feeling I'll...be falling asleep early tonight. I should get it done."

You: Sirius offered out a hand to help the other up. "Nah, I bet he's too distracted making eyes at Lily," Sirius teased, fluttering his lashes at the girl playfully. "Right, Lily?"

Stranger: Lily snapped out of her little world with James, a blush coming across her cheeks. "What? Oh, um--" she glanced over at James. "Nobody is making eyes at anyone."

You: "Ha! Right! Whatever you say, Lily," Sirius chuckled before making a kissing face towards them both. "You guys don't do anything I wouldn't do," he teased with a wink, "I think I'm gonna walk Remus to his next class before he collapses on himself."

Stranger: Lily rolled her eyes and flipped him off as well, something she had picked up from James no doubt. Remus glanced up as he was mentioned, and frowned. "I'm not gonna collapse. Wide awake, see?"

You: Sirius paid Remus no mind as he pulled him a long, calling over his shoulder. "James you're a bad influence on her!" he laughed just as they turned the corned and were suddenly on their own. Sirius let his smile fade now that they didn't have an audience though he didn't speak, unsure of what to say.

Stranger: Remus grumbled but sighed, following Sirius. He let him get pulled along, his bag swinging over his shoulder. When they were out of sight, the man glanced over his shoulder. "They're insane ,the lot of them.."

You: "Might as well include us in that lot as well, Remus," Sirius pointed out before shooting the man a side glance. "You're hiding something, aren't you?" he asked deciding that a blunt approach would be best.

Stranger: "I'm hardly insane." he puffed a breath out. "I'm the sanest one around." At the accusation, Remus stopped in his steps, and he frowned. "What would I be hiding."

You: Sirius turned to him, studying the bags under his eyes and his exhausted features. "That's what I would like to know," he countered, "You obvious haven't slept, you're moody, and you know enough about charms that if it were something as simple as a bad dream you would have taken care of it by now," Sirius pointed out, crossing his arms over his chest, "Exams aren't for a few months and-" he paused, realization striking, a devilish smile spreading across his lips. "You've been sneaking out, haven't you?! Who is she? Couldn't be a Gryffindor or you wouldn't be up all night... Is it that Hufflepuff girl I always see trailing after you? What was her name? Levy? Levi? Lindsye?" he pretended to stumbled over the girl in question, knowing full well her name was Lauraine, not wanting Remus to think that he pays far too much attention to him.

Stranger: Remus felt like he was going to throw up for real now. He sucked in a breath and rolled his eyes, pushing a hand through his hair. "Fuck man, maybe I just had a bad night sleep, okay?" he frowned. "I get -- insomnia sometimes. I don't like to take potions all the time because I don't think it's good for you ." he felt his face heat up at the insinuation that he was hooking up with a Hufflepuff, and he groaned, covering his face with his hands. "Sirius, shut the hell up. Please." he shook his head. "I'm not--I'm not sneaking out with some girl."

You: "Some guy then?" Sirius shrugged, his grin broadening to hide his sudden wave of jealousy. "Hey, I'm not one to judge, we're mates regardless of who you decide to shack up with." He moved to loop his arm around Remus' and start walking again. "No reason to get cranky about it."

Stranger: Remus let out a shaky breath. "I'm not shaking up with some guy, either," he groaned. "I'm--" he paused for a long moment, trying to come up with something on the spot. "I'm taking extra lessons with Gonny. At night, when everyone's asleep. Not a lot, just like. Every couple weeks. She's.. helping me learn some higher level charms and stuff."

You: "Oh," Sirius mumbled a bit put out, but far more relieved than anything. "Wait... why do you need to know higher charms? I mean, I get that you're talented and all, but that's a bit excessive and why would you keep that a secret?" he asked absently, brows furrowing as he attempted to work it all out.

Stranger: He shrugged. "She didn't want the other students getting jealous." He explained, frowning. "I just. Was curious, and thought about maybe going into a job with the Ministry with it, so." he cleared his throat. "And she likes that I'm a hard worker, so she was willing to teach me. If you want to join you can go ask her, but--"

You: "Brilliant! I could use some extra studies in Charms. If I'm gonna become an Aura I have to get Outstanding on the OWLS and I only got Exceeds, but I was talking to Peter earlier and they're letting him retake his. Maybe they'll let me retake mine!" Sirius chimed, beaming with excitement as he pulled away from his mate. "I'm going to see if I can speak to the Headmaster about the exams. Meet you in the common room after supper?" He called already hurrying down the corridor.

Stranger: Remus opened his mouth in surprise at Sirius's willingness to take up extra charms and transfiguration lessons, and he looked surprised. But before he could even make a rebuttal, Sirius was off. "Fuck," he groaned, and shook his head, trying to race to Minerva's office to go and tell him what he had done. Besides Dumbledore, she was the only person that knew what he was. He best go ask her if they could start up some random charms practice now and then.

You: [[Quick questions (srry just want to make sure I don't overstep): Do you have a preference on how you want this to go or do you just want to wing it? Are you wanting to do the scene with Minerva or Dumbledore or skip to that even? I figured with Sirius it could go two ways either they tell him yes but he didn't talk to the charms prof so he shows up just all like 'hi! ready to go to charms, mate?!' or he figures out somethings off and there is no extra charms and he confronts Remus about lying to him. ]]

Stranger: [[ooh lets maybe do the lying ]

Stranger: [and uh. lets skip the scenes with Dumbledore and minerva]

You: [[Ooo ^.^ yay I was hoping you'd go with the lying >:3 ]]

Stranger: <3]

You: Sirius managed to attend the rest of his classes though he seemed a bit stand offish whenever he caught sight of Remus or James and Peter for that matter. He didn't bother showing up for dinner either. In fact, it wasn't until they were to meet in the Gryffindor common room that he showed his face. His usual smile was absent, replaces by pursed lips as he studied Remus silently for a moment. It seemed as if the dark haired man wasn't going to speak at first, but eventually he let out a heavy sigh. "Charms, huh?" he asked evenly, a brow arching as he pinned Remus with a dark stare, waiting for his next excuse.

Stranger: brb!!]

Stranger: Remus wasn't able to find Mcgonogall all afternoon. In her study, in class -- He finally had to give up to try and find her. He needed to get some homework done. He finished out his classes and was immediately kept up in the common room the rest of the night, hurriedly scrawling away, watching the clock tick away. The moon would be at it's highest point by 9pm, which meant he needed to leave by 8pm to get himself hidden in the shrieking shack. He glanced up as he felt the gaze of someone on him, and he parted his lips. "I--um. What?" he asked weakly. He only had twenty minutes before he had to leave.

You: "Don't play dumb Remus, its not a good look on you," Sirius grumbled, crossing his arms. "You lied to me! We're suppose to be best mates! Best mates don't lie to one another!" he snapped, losing a bit of his temper.

Stranger: Remus snapped his mouth close and let out a shaky breath. "I--" he stammered, and made another glance at the clock. "You're right." he nodded quickly. "I'm. seeing that Hufflepuff girl. Lauraine." he said quickly. "I didn't want to get the same shit that James gets for Lily because she's.. shy."

You: "Bullshit," Sirius snapped without hesitation. "You know the only reason I give James hell about Lily is because Lily is just as much a mate as he is. You are also a horrible liar..." he hesitated, something similar to pain crossing his features. "or at least I thought you were. Whatever you're hiding Remus... I hope its worth it," he spat, his anger returning full force as he gave the other boy a shove.

Stranger: Remus really didn't have the energy in him so close to the moon. When Sirius shoved him, he knocked back hard into the corner of the table, letting out a little yelp. "Maybe just mind your own business," he huffed out through a grimace. "If I wanted you to know, then I'd tell you."

You: "Last I checked, you are my business!" Sirius growled, kicking the chair between them out of the way. "At least, if we're best mates, it is... but then again, apparently... we're not," he added his voice lowering once more. "My mistake."

You: [[brb]]

Stranger: [nw]

Stranger: Remus backed away from the man, moving to start shoving his papers and books back into his bag. "I don't have to tell you everything about me, Sirius. Just. Drop it, okay?" he huffed out a long breath, swinging his bag over his shoulder. "I have to go."

Stranger: brb]

You: "No, of course, not! Why would you?!" Sirius snapped at him. "Go then! I'm not stopping you! It's not like I could even if I tried, obviously! Just don't expect me to come looking for you when you're late for class in the morning... or when you need another potion! I would hate to assume you needed me for anything."

Stranger: Remus felt a hard shudder run through his body, and he doubled over briefly. He glanced at the clock and puffed a breath. Why was he-- the moon didn't finish for another hour, at least. It dawned on him, there, that he forgot to account for the time change. He made a noise in his throat, hands shaking. "I'm--I'm sorry, I have to go." he said, and bolted from the common room.

You: Sirius' hesitated as he watched Remus falter, his anger and hurt forgotten. "Remus!" he jerked forward, intent on giving the man a hand but he was already bolting down the corridor leading towards the stairs. "Remus!" Sirius called after him, a spike of worry joining the concoction of emotions swirling inside him. He paused for a breath... another... before he realized what he was doing he was half way down the stairs, barely managing to keep the other boy in his sights.

Stranger: Remus was shaking, feeling his breath coming out hard, his bones aching inside of his skin. He had to pause, once, as another hard shudder rippled through him, before he was staggering towards the hidden passage behind the statue. He heard Sirius calling behind him, and just hoped he could keep out of his eye sight. Sirius couldn't be there for him, it was too dangerous.

You: "Remus wait!" Sirius called again, the words coming out breathless as he hurried down the stairs, catching a glimpse of the other boy just as he ducked behind one of the statues. Sirius didn't hesitate to follow, blindly following at this point. Whatever Remus was hiding was more than just some silly secret between friends that much was obvious now. But whatever it /was/, judging by the shaking and cries coming from the other boy was painful and possibly dangerous. Sirius had heard of some slytherins selling gillyweed and waking death to other students for kicks but... he had never pinned Remus as one to partake in something so dangerous. Now, however, he couldn't be so sure.

Stranger: Remus could feel the blood rushing in his ears, drowning out all other sounds. He made it to the statue, ducking behind it and entering the hidden passage. It was mostly dirt, dug through what had to be centuries ago, making his way under Hogwarts and towards the shrieking shack. He just needed to get there, then he could -- he could let the shift finish. A strained whimper came from his throat, seeing the door in sight. He reached to yank it open, clambering out. He fell to his hands and knees onto the old, rotting, wooden floor of the shack, gasping for air. He could feel the howl starting to catch in his throat.

You: Sirius slid to a stop in front of the small tunnel, heart sinking. He hated tight spaces... They were worse than boggarts... He shifted from one foot to another before he managed enough courage to dive in, doing his best to focus on the way Lupin had sounded, the way he had shivered. His friend needed him whether he knew it or not and Sirius was sure as hell going to- A howl broke through the sound of his trembling breaths making him pause, glancing up at the small bit of moonlight at the end of the tunnel. Remus wasn't alone! Something was there! He had to get to him! "Remus!!!!" He called desperately, doubling his efforts as he crawled through the tight space. "Remus! I'm coming!"

Stranger: [agsjldf sorry im helping boyfriend w/ dinner so lots of back and forth. we can always move to email or discord if its easier. brb]

You: [[No worries! I gotta get my son to bed anyways. Discord is still working for me but I would love to continue via email when we have to cut off if that's cool. I would hate to lose ya. Good Rp partners are so hard to come by.]]

Stranger has disconnected.

#wolfstar #omegle rp #remus/sirius #sirius/remus #lupin/black #black/lupin #roleplay

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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mothpile · 4 years

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OK IM GOING TO TALK ABOUT SMOKEWEED AND THEIR CHARACTER ARC AND STORY AND SHIT. ERINS WISH THEY WERE ME WITH MY FANTASTIC STORY TELLING.

smokeweed starts off as a rogue named smoke, who was kicked out of their home by their mom when they were around the apprentice age bcoz that’s just the way rogues seem to work. Anyhow, Smoke ends up finding the clans. They quickly become fascinated by the fact all these cats seem to work together so well, a contrast to the cruel “only help yourself” world their mother taught them.

One of their days of observing in thunderclan actually gets them caught by a patrol, where they are then brough back to the base to be questioned. A bit of talking happens here, and the clan offers to let Smoke join them as they seem curious and r also like. just an Apprentice this is a Three Year Old theyre not gonna kick them out and stuff. So Smoke becomes Smokepaw. Smoke views this as an example of how nice the clans are, and feel genuinely accepted among their ranks.

Over the span of their months of training though, Smokepaw’s perfect view upon the clans begins to .... shatter. horribly. It begins a bit with their confusion over why the clans seem to want to guard their borders so much. Smokepaw thought that they all worked together, no? But the explanation for this they get is that “Everyone has an equal amount of land to hunt in, and it’s important to make sure no one tries to... break that boundary. If others start coming into our territory to hunt our stuff, we won’t have enough food for ourselves!” which to Smokepaw...makes enough sense to them. at the time.

It’s when Smokepaw gets to go to their first Gathering, a real moment to interact with other clans. They immediately start getting friendly with other clan apprentices, specifically one from Shadowclan named Patchpaw. (Patchpaw is ... curious about Smokepaw’s friendliness, which gets her to think maybe Smokepaw’s trying to use her for information about her clan, but... quickly realizes Smokepaw is just being nice). Anyhow, smokepaw ends up leaving the gathering believing they have properly made friends with alll the other apprentices.

They’re quickly taught this is not the case when they bring it up once to another thunderclan apprentice. The apprentice tells smokepaw that “no, you’re not really friends with them. you can never be! what if we go to battle against their clan? would you fight them then? how would you remain loyal to us if you think your enemies you’re supposed to be attacking are your friends?” . This sends Smokepaw into their first big dilemma spiral. They cant understand why the clans would fight each other. They cant understand what’s why having friends outside of their clan would be such a big deal. So, for the first time, Smokepaw finds themself questioning the way the clans are running everything.

It’s during a hunt they were on near the shadowclan border when smokepaw runs into Patchpaw again. They talk, and Smokepaw ends up asking if they really are friends. Patchpaw is caught a bit off guard by this, but. well. when she hesitantly says “i... dont know? im pretty sure youre not supposed to be that with other clans” . which gets smokepaw to ask Why. patchpaw gives the same answer (well. what if our clans Fight eachother). smokepaw asks Why would that happen. patchpaw goes . um. well. over prey i guess? and smokepaw asks again Why. why would there have to be bloodshed over that. there’s enough prey for everyone, isnt there? patchpaw replies “i mean. sometimes theres not? so maybe cats would go try and steal from other clans for food.” and smokepaw asks “wait but wouldnt it make sense to all work together at a time like that? why would you compete at a serious crisis like that. wouldn’t it be more logical to get everyone to work together to make sure every cat who needs food Gets it rather than fight over scraps??” and. This Is The First Time Patchpaw ends up questioning the code. Unsure of how to respond, Patchpaw finds herself Agreeing with what smokepaw has just said. The two agree to meet up again sometime, and , well, friendship. and gay rights. but we’ll get there a bit later i think

Time goes on, Smokepaw ends up nearing the day they become a full on warrior, but time and time again the clans have proved themselves to be dumb as all shit. Their enthusiasm and energy has drained away, leaving them tired and bitter. They still meet up with Patchpaw and stuff. At this point smokepaw rlly does love her. One day, while smokepaw’s hanging around other fellow thunderclan apprentices, one of them asks if smokepaw Likes anyone. yknow. just fun Banter. smokepaw, who doesnt Know at this point you’re not supposed to like cats from other clans that way, lets it slip that they like 1 of the apprentices in shadowclan. this. Does not go well. really it’s just home of phobia at its finest. Obviously the apprentices snitch to the higher ups, and Smokepaw receives a whole lecture about the ‘Importance of the warrior code’ and how ‘yeah you’re not a Real clan cat so of course you cant understand how IMPORTANT the code is’. this is something told to them by the LEADER. a scolding from the Big Boss. and this ends up bein the Final Straw for smokepaw. they fucking go ham and SNAP. yknow how ive gone off about the Issues w/ warrior cats? yeah they do That basically.

So they have their mini-revolution moment, dragging out all of the clans faults in the form of speech. Obviously other cats end up hearing their rant, and are all...unsure about what to do about this. Smokepaw ends their rant by now rejecting the name the clan has given them, and swears that the clans will all tear themselves apart by their own claws. or smthing like that. smthing over the top and Dramatic along the lines of ‘ouroboros eating itself” and whatnot.

Smoke quits the clan and runs away. Before leaving the territories though, they do try to find patchpaw. at this point, patchpaw has been promoted to patchpelt. Smoke tells patchpelt about everything that has happened, and how theyre leaving. They ask if patchpelt wants to run away with them. Patchpelt is too conflicted to answer this, and ends up saying she cant leave behind her life like that. Smoke is obviously a bit.... saddened. Devastated if you will by this. But they understand, and leave patchpelt behind.

Patchpelt, who was a warrior, quickly finds herself getting tired by the clans bs. She tries to switch her path to become a medicine cat to fix the problem, hoping now she wont have to tag along with the whole “fighting eachother over nothing” shit, but it doesnt work. She..... regrets not running away with smoke. practically everyday.

Smoke, while away, goes on a series of journeys and what have you. to TL;DR it, they end up meeting Midnight and become a bit of an apprentice to her and learn. a LOT. smoke Super Woke now. They also find a kit/apprentince along their journey, a 3 legged bastard of a gremlin cat named Three, who they end up taking care of. There is also another kid Smoke adopts named Rattail, who. as her name implies, has a... rat tail. Rattail is a bit scarred all over so they have a lotta bare patches of skin and what have you. Somewhere down the line, smoke decides to name themself Smokeweed out of a funni ‘haha. like Weed the drug’ and in a bit of a spite move against the clans.

Some More Time down the road, Smokeweed actually comes back to the clans to see what’s going on. It happens to be they’ve stopped by at a time all the clans are at each others throats. They have a reuinting moment with Patchpelt, who now is like “oh god please for the love of god get me out of here” . so they run off together for Realizies now.

This lil family ends up settlin down at the Church place in that. Tigerheart Superedition book. personally i like thts a Nice Place and think it’s a fitting and sweet end to let the 4 all get to.. settle down. be happy and safe away from the clans and all their bs. they just Vibe..... and life is good for them. thats the End. <3

#MES GOES OFF ABOUT AN OC THAT STARTED OFF AS A JOKE BUT THEN GOT SERIOUS. <3 #moth talk

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itgirlgasly · 5 years

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Rules of the game: Answer these questions and tag 10 blogs you’d like to know better!

i got tagged by @callumilott thank uuuuuu

Nickname: my name has 4 letters so apart from my friends calling me a dumb bitch i dont have a nickname

Zodiac: leo ! fuck yeah !

Height: 183cm

Time: 9:42am im at uni and dont want to start working on my paper

Favourite band/artist: of all time ?? three days grace bcs my teen emo years were DEFINED by adam gontiers angsty music and probably the german rapper rockstah bcs hes the reason i got into my one true love rap

Song stuck in my head: a very annoying remix of slide away by miley cyrus cruel summer by taylor swift and kein plan by loredana

Last movie I saw: IT 2 !!!

Last thing i googled: fontain duchamp bcs i wanted to check something for an instagram post

Other blogs: @leoleoaries is my main blog thats not active bcs i moved on to that side blog life, @chanelvenus is my like. personal/aesthetic blog and @1quicksilver is my pop culture/comic/gaming blog lmao

Why this username: i love pierre gasly.

following: 535

Average amount of sleep: either 5-7 or 12 we dont do the healthy amount of sleep thing in this house

Lucky number: 11 and YES im bitter perez has that number right now bcs i dont care about him

What I’m wearing: cropped pink rose hoodie and thrifted mens suit pants and white sneakers

Dream job: good question im a philosophy major please tell me what the fuck im gonna do with that

Dream trips: seoul !! or like a really cute trip through southern europe with my man

Favourite food: salmon ??? sushi ??? lasagna???? those really good czech potato things ??? burritos??? it depends on the day man

Instruments I play: none i cant do the whole music thing

Eye colour: muddy brown green-ish

Hair color: dirty blonde but i dyed it red

Aesthetics: blazers and hoodies and denim, coffee and a croissant, old school hiphop and long conversations, a really cold day with warm sun rays

Languages I speak: german english bit of french bit of russian

Most iconic song: cascada every time we touch ! absolutely iconic

Random fact: ppl are scared of me but im very nice and kind and soft i just curse a lot

i tag everyone who wants to do this lmaooo

#tags #tagged #i forgotttttt

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sinsfox · 6 years

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Care to tell us about Ban's depression and all?

yoko you just had to ask this since i mentioned it to you huh

OF COURSE I CAN TALK ABT IT

this is gonna get long, so ima put it under the cut but theres going to be content warning galore, but itll be tagged

im really not going to beat around the bush here.

i headcanon ban to have depression, but at this point, it seems to me to be implied that he does. would it be professionally diagnosed? fuck no. ban gives less than a shit about himself, i dont think he would be obligated to figure out why he feels hollow or dulled. why life is a bore, and he only ever feels alive in a fight or when hes ‘killed’.

to him its a feeling he can easily shrug off and ignore and he easily puts up a front of being the easy going, out there kind of guy that he is. eccentric and melodious in his tone, fight enthusiastic and seemingly taking his interest in whatever seems convenient at the time. stealing what he wants, even if its the clothes off someones back. drinking ale and laughing it up like no tomorrow until he passes out.

but at the end of the day, hes lonely. hes tired. despite the things that are fun that he does have fun with, its still hard to completely forget the void that he feels and how much duller things seem nowadays ever since the incident in the fairy kings forest.

it only got worse since that day.

his childhood was the start of it all.

his parents neglected him and his sister. his little sister died from starvation at four years old. that was the first time ban felt alone. his parents cared nothing for them. ban was used to try and obtain food for his mother and father, while not being allowed to eat himself. his father would beat him if he did eat. his father would beat him if ban even slept. it wasnt a good environment. ban ran away from home often.

then ban was caught stealing and was sent to prison and that was where he met zhivago and they escaped together. and ban took to secretly meeting zhivago whenever he could and was given food by him to eat. zhivago helped him survive. zhivago taught ban all he needed to know about thieving and even saved his life from starvation and from being kidnapped and almost being sold to a noblewoman who tortured and killed children.

zhivago adopted ban. he referred to ban as his son in a conversation with ban himself. telling him how he had one son named therion who was nothing like ban, a shy kid. and how he had another son named ban who was a troublemaker with a bad mouth.

hearing that made ban happy. and he felt like he had family again.

then one day when they were to do a heist together, ban got impatient and went on his own. and got caught by the guards and was beaten by them. and zhivago was handed two choices: save ban or save therion. ultimately zhivago made his choice and abandoned ban ( he was crying when he made his choice ) for the sake of saving his own son, which he was too late in doing.

that was the second time ban felt alone in the world.

years pass, ban is a bandit now. he goes after the fountain of youth after hearing talk of it in a bar. he enters the fairy kings forest. he persists in getting to the fountain. thats when he meets elaine. and in seven days he grew close to her and helped her battle her seven hundred years of loneliness. and he fell in love with her and was going to bring her brother back to the forest, and make him take her place so ban could take her away.

but then a demon attacked. and elaine, who ban wanted to save with the fountain of youth, fed the water to ban which made him immortal. and he kills the demon, but elaine dies before he can even begin to help her.

that is the third time ban felt alone in the world.

and he was heart broken.

its at this point in time that ban believe he cannot be close to anyone, for they are going to leave him. by dying or by abandoning him. he refuses to fight when he is arrested and accused of a false crime but what can he do. he has no proof against their claim, and they cannot do anything to an immortal being. so he takes the brunt of it all and allows himself to be executed over and over again in his time captured.

its at this point that ban wishes he could die. because he doesnt want to live. not when he had nothing to consider a family from his little sister dying so young, his parents neglecting and abusing him. zhivago was his ideal father, he never held a grudge against the man for abandoning him but it still left a hefty hole for ban to carry. and elaine was killed before him and she used the last of her strength to save him instead of herself.

he was powerless to stop any of this from happening. despite that he was only a child, that he was just a human.

meeting meliodas was another of the happier moments in his life. when the man busted him out of prison, literally punching him through the wall, ban knew immediately that meliodas was someone he did not want to lose. there was an interest gained in this man. ban didnt want meliodas to disappear on him. he didnt want him to leave like the rest.

of course history happens, ban gets imprisoned by the weird fangs when he hears that meliodas had passed ( a lie ). and he endures torture yet again to ease the emptiness that wracks his being. bans stated before that dying is just another part of life for him. a daily occurrence. hes mentioned before that hes felt like dying. that its been a long time since he felt like dying.

it doesnt change the fact that hes felt that way.

there are points in time where ban berates himself. degrades himself. hes called himself a bad person. hes referred to himself as a useless piece of shit. that hes powerless. that hes an awful friend. all in regards to being unable to protect those he loves and cares about.

ban cares little about his own well being. its why he fights as reckless as he does, aside from his immortality. ban does not care about himself. theres nothing he likes about him. theres… nothing. he feels nothing for himself. he doesnt even consider himself human anymore unless hes referred to as one.

one wouldnt even think ban feels or thinks this way considering the way he is, as i said before. its easy to think ban is someone who doesnt feel that way but really its been eating at him for over the entirety of his life. ever since his childhood. ever since elaine died.

and he has terrible ways of coping with it all.

ban drinks himself silly. he lets himself get brutally murdered just come back to life and have it done again when he fights. he seeks out getting arrested to endure torture to feel something than nothing. because hes so tired of feeling nothing.

but in the end, no one except meliodas and elaine ( and king ) are capable of telling really telling bans actual emotions and the way he feels. because around them he drops the face of the fox sin everyone knows. because hes tired. hes empty. he can fake a smile and really well at that. he can put on the face of excitement, the outgoing personality and passion he can exude when needed. but at the end of the day, those feelings and thoughts are still there.

ban has, since gaining immortality, fantasized about death. idealized it. wished he could die. because being immortal is boring. living and dying near constantly runs dry after a time and to think that dying is a daily part of life now is cruel to him when he wakes up like nothing happened.

it was worse when the rumor meliodas had died got around, after hed finally learned to be happy again after the loss of elaine.

when he learned meliodas was indeed alive, and was busted out of baste dungeon to reunite with meliodas, he was happy again.

when the ten commandments and demon clan were released from their seal, and melascula using her magic with the venegeful soul revival, elaine was resurrected and ban was able to reunite with her too, after quelling her anger and hate towards those who had spent their time around ban when she could note and melascula still being kept alive kept elaine alive.

ban was made all the more happier then, too.

but elaine can read bans heart like fairies can. meliodas can read ban like a book because theyre best friends and meliodas understands ban just as ban understands him. and hes able to be open with them, more so than anyone else.

they are the only two he can really be truthful with in regards to his emotions because they are the only two that he trusts enough to let his guard down around and let them see the side that he hides from everyone else.

because he doesnt need more people worrying or whatever in his mind. he doesnt need peoples concerns when hes fine by technicality because hes immortal and nothing will ever come of anything even if he tried to do something. his sense of self-worth is abyssal, he cares so little about himself. hed rather everyone around him be okay and happy than have people worrying over him because its something hes felt for a long time, a very long time. something hes dealt with all on his own ( until elaine and meliodas came into his life ) and hed rather not include anymore people in it.

ban has gotten the short and shit end of the stick too many times to count. hes lost people. hes been unable to save people. he feels powerless in situations he cant do anything to change or fix. he berates himself over these things.

and he tries to keep others out of it because its not something they should deal with, its his own problem. but its hard to deal with it when he doesnt want to. he wants it to go away, he wants to stop feeling and thinking it. but its hard when its constant and he cant do anything about it. aside from drown himself in ale and liquor. and fight so recklessly and with abandon because hell be fine, hell come out unscathed and it gives him something to better focus his energy on than the hollow dull ache in his chest.

thats about the long and short of it

#cxrsedsilence #*letters. ⟨ ask. ⟩#*record information. ⟨ headcanon. ⟩#theres rlly content warning all over the place for this #jesus christ but anyways #suicide mention cw.#abuse mention cw.#death mention cw.#alcohol mention cw.#UH LEMME KNOW IF I NEED OTHER TAGS FOR THIS I THINK THOSE ARE THE BIG ONES HERE THOUGH

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dylanobrienisbatman · 6 years

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10 Shipping Questions

Rules: Answer these 10 questions and tag 10 people.

Tagged by No One but @professorbellarke said anyone should do it so i am

Tagging: @dracovengeance @the-most-beautiful-broom @hedaalicia @nightbleeder @pillowprincesslexa @raven-reyes-of-sunshine @bellamynochillblake @bisexualbellamys @bellamy-fucking-blake @amihanmayari

Ultimate OTP: I honestly feel like its Bellarke, but Stydia was the first ship i ever truly like, obsessed over, so they hold a special place in my heart.

A ship you’ll always love: As i’ve gotten older a lot of ships i loved have lost their shiny feeling for me. I love Nathan/Haley (OTH), Bellarke (T100), Stydia (TW), Scira (TW), Memori (T100), Rory/Jess (Gilmore Girls) and Brooke Davis/Happiness. thats really my mains.

My current obsession: The 100, which is just... its taken over my fucking life honestly. All the ships, Memori, Bellarke, Zaven, im so into all of it.

A ship you never thought you’d like: See i’m a huge multishipper, so I dont really have any outright opinions about ships that are negative, until i see a reason to dislike them. So i dont have one of these, where i thought i’d dislike them and now i dont. idk.

A ship you liked but don’t anymore: I loved Delena and Chuck/Blair, but now i realise that they were both so weirdly toxic? like i dont like their like, opposing ships in their place now but i just sort of feel nothing for them anymore.

A ship you think should be canon: Bellarke, obviously. Rory and Jess.

A canon ship you hate: I TRULY hate Peyton/Lucas, but im glad they ended up together and their toxic asses left Brooke Davis to be at peace, finally. I also thought Dair in Gossip Girl was stupid and random, like they had no idea what to do with their plot so they were like “well blair hasn’t been with Dan yet!”. I also detested Lydia/Jackson, but i think we were supposed to hate it because he’s such a dick. I didn’t really enjoy CL, but i didn’t hate it, it was mostly because it felt undeveloped more than anything. Like i thought their dynamic in season 2 was so interesting, and then in s3 they just trashed it because they needed to get to the romance in such a short window of time. It was rushed and i had no connection too it, which was weird since i DID have a connection too it in s2. I also have grown to hate Linctavia because (1) Octavia has basically bastardised everything about Lincoln’s memory and become a thing he would hate in his name, which is such a fucking annoyance, and (2) because she is such an abusive person to the people in her life, rewatching s2/s3 really showed me that she was downright cruel to him so much, just because he was trying to find a new place in the world that didn’t jive with what she wanted.

A ship you’ve been shipping for years: Good lord. Bellarke is coming up on 5 full seasons now. Stydia i shipped for 6 seasons.

A ship everyone loves but you don’t care about: Maybe CL fits better here? idk. I’m also really whatever about Kabby on the 100, like i didn’t super love the idea of it at the beginning and now its 6 years later and i still dont feel like it makes sense? like i dont feel their chemistry, it feels like they needed an adult romance and Kane/Abby were the only two that made sense because it sure as shit wasn’t gonna be Jaha. ALso theres a huge group of people who love Ster/ek and i literally can’t stand it.

Favorite rarepair: I really loved the concept of Sea Mechanic, it was such a great idea that the fans sort of threw out and the show didn’t really notice the potential of? Minty, which might not be that much of a rarepair but its so far from canon that im counting it?

#the 100 #ship tag game #teen wolf #gossip girl #one tree hill #gilmore girls #bellarke #stydia #memori #anti octavia blake #about me #tag games

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

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