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obsob · 7 months

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the accolade ( the...the cat-olade...)

#mine #original #i cannot even begin to explain the anguish. the torment. this drawing has brought me #and i STILL dont like it. i simply cant work on it any longer i cant i cant. i must be rid of it #eating drywall as we speak #you want to know how many weeks ive worked on this. THREE. ALMOST.#you want to know how long my other cat drawings take me ?? 3 days absolute MAX #anyway. begon foul creature etc #i havent left extremely long tags for a long while hello everyone good lord there are many of you #we are going stratford this weekend very exciting #its going to be a little chilly and i want to take my new coat with me but issue its not chilly right now so i cant wear it onto the train #i do not think. i can. stuff it into my suitcase i dont think that will happen #i am sure i will figure it out #also. no longer vegan . eggs have won me over. egg egg egg.#im having to restrain myself SO hard from buying more wool i want a shawl i want a shawl #i want more cute DRESSES why are nice comfy dresses 10000£#i look on vinted and its like dresses for popping your pussy in like not. the vibe im going for thank u #anyway. im going to eat crackers now

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steddieas-shegoes · 2 months

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It’s been done in every which way but Eddie being in an accident of some kind that leaves him paralyzed, but his doctors believe he could walk again with intense physical therapy

He’s stubborn and absolutely hasn’t dealt with any of the trauma of the accident and takes it out on his physical therapist, Steve, who is used to patients being pretty angry about their situation

He always meets Eddie where he is though, tries to keep a smile on his face and joke when appropriate and even shares his cookies from his lunchbox with him

Eventually, Eddie starts making some progress, but instead of being happy about it, he panics and cancels all his PT appointments for the week

Steve tries calling, texting, emailing, doing everything he can to encourage him to keep going, but it all goes unanswered until Gareth, one of Eddie’s closest friends, calls him on Eddie’s phone

He’s depressed and he won’t get out of bed, he’s given up. He’s tired of being in pain and having to try to so hard just to move his damn legs a little

Steve isn’t usually this personal with clients, and tells Gareth he can’t discuss anything medical with him due to patient confidentiality, but insists he should try to drag him to the office the next day before it opens

And somehow, probably through guilt, Gareth manages to wheel a very sullen and grumpy Eddie into the side door entrance to the office at seven in the morning

Steve tells him to come back in an hour to pick him up and Eddie ignores the goodbye Gareth says to him

And Steve pretends nothing is wrong at all, goes through the usual temperature and blood pressure check, asks how he’s feeling and gets a grunt in response, asks if there’s any pain and gets an eye roll

But Eddie met his match in Steve because Steve then pushes him to the center of the workout room, where a large mat is out and a walker is set to the side

“What’s that?”

“Your walker.”

“I don’t need one seeing as I can’t fucking walk.”

“You are today.”

And Steve knows he’s pushing and he hates being pushy

But he knows what his clients are capable of, and he knows without a single doubt in his mind that Eddie is ready to use the walker for five to ten minute increments. He has the leg strength and the stubbornness, he just needs the belief in himself

“Do you want me to hurt myself worse?”

“Of course not. And if you get tired, the seat on the walker is right there. But you can walk and you will walk.”

“And if I call Gareth to come get me right now?”

“Then I don’t believe my services are of value to you anymore and I’ll wish you the best.”

It pained Steve to say it because he knew he was fucking good at what he did, maybe the best in town. His clients often had to wait for his availability to open for weeks or months at a time because of how many people were referred to him

But he said the right thing because Eddie huffed, groaned, and cursed under his breath before wheeling himself to the edge of the mat to hold onto the walker

He pulled himself up

His legs were shaking from not being used for the last few days more than the bare minimum, but his determination was clear

Steve slowly pulled the chair away as Eddie unlocked the brakes of the walker and glared at Steve as he took one step, then two

Sure, he was relying pretty heavily on the walker, maybe more than Steve would’ve liked to see, but he was moving

He made it across the mat and then locked the brakes, sat down on the pad on the walker, and gave a sarcastic grin to Steve

“Happy?”

“Are you?”

And maybe Eddie wasn’t ready to be asked that because he was suddenly sobbing, covering his face as tears flowed down his cheeks

Steve gave him a few seconds before moving to kneel in front of him, pulling his hands away

“You deserve to have your life back, Eddie. You’ve been lucky to have the chance to walk again. Let’s not waste it, okay?”

Eddie spent the rest of the session walking across the mat and taking breaks every two minutes or so

It was better than Steve even expected, but he reminded Eddie not to do too much at once

Eddie didn’t miss any more appointments with Steve, and every appointment, he seemed to be more charming and flirty, more like “the old Eddie” according to Gareth, who drove him most days

Steve never admitted it out loud, but he knew what he felt for Eddie was different from other clients. It felt more personal, and it felt like it could be more someday

When Eddie graduated to a cane, Steve’s services were officially no longer needed

And Eddie decided that he should probably take Steve out on a date

“Since I can walk and hold your hand now,” he winked.

Steve should say no, but he doesn’t

Because holding Eddie’s hand feels even more right as his boyfriend than it did as his physical therapist

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #headcanon #physical therapist Steve #idk going through my notes on things I’ll never have time to actually write #but maybe someone else does #I’m literally ignoring work so hard right now #I’m just tired!!!!#im just a girl who doesn’t wanna work anymore!!!!#cw: injury #cw: mention of accident

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enden-agolor · 2 months

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am i even a real lukas fan without drawing his trailer design? so there’s that. also have some very sweet and gentle baja blast boys 🤗

#sorry for being absent kind of going through a lot of life hell right now #im working on something pretty angsty on the side #and working on finishing recovery too #its a lot #anyways enjoy #my art #jesskas #mcsm jesse #mcsm lukas #mcsm fanart #mcsm

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kokoasci · 11 months

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finally drew the main doa together :>

#i love using symbolism in my art :D #first full bsd background wowee how did i use to to do this like every week #ok so im going to be like extremely real right now. i hate the colors and this piece in general #its probably because ive spent so long on it and im still not happy with it BUT ive worked on it for so long that i think its worth sharing #also doesnt help that i did this background with like no references. dont do that please #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd nikolai gogol #sigma #fyodor dostoevsky #bsd art #bsd fanart #bsd fyodor #sigma bsd #kokoart

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nordidia · 1 month

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having a very rough night so raph doodles needed to be made

when in need, mash two interests together

#i love him so muhc ghghgh #and uh please stop sending me asks straight up demanding me to draw more /nm #if u've sent me an ask just regarding art before pls dont feel anxious this is about people actually DEMANDING like im some sort of machine #im absent due to my work/mental health situation going up and down #tmnt will ofc always be special interest but right now its in the back row #theres little time for anything but work and meetings and thinking about work and.. well.. monster hunter escapism egsfkhjhh..#but yeah i promise im still here #and i want to draw him when i can #but stress is high right now and drawing takes too much wrist stamina to do often now #i hope u understand #sorry if i worded myself badly im very tired and stresed n its ... oh its 5am great. wellp. goodnight skafklgsjdklfnshh #my art #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt #nordidia art #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt raph #id in alt text #also one would think my art style is easy on my wrist but #i gorilla grip my pen and when i learned to write as a child i held the pencil jank #and it stuck like that #so its really rough on my hands #sadly

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densewentz · 6 months

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i think the turning point in my life both academically and professionally was realizing that. If you Go First, be it a presentation or an interview or whatever. If you go first, you are being judged based on NOTHING but yourself. They aren't comparing you to anyone else, you don't have an act to "follow". You are the Bar. You can literally just do the best you can and at that point it will automatically be the best they've seen so far. And once you're done you're done. You can mentally and emotionally check out.

Game changer insofar as being stressed about presenting because now I just bulldoze over everyone else to go first like a feral hog.

#its true though #all my anxiety about presentations got reduced SIGNIFICANTLY once I started fighting to be first #its Good Advice #this actually especially applies to people with unfinished work like #girl you do not want to watch 9 people with complete presentations go and then give your speech #just jump on that grenade early before they've had time to be impressed by anyone #and the fallout wont be NEARLY as bad #and then its over right away #also if youre a smug petty bitch like me #you can absolutely blow the performance out of the water #and bask in the absolutely traumatized expressions of everyone who has to go after you now #if im gonna be the bar im going to set it at the ceiling #sorry #so i guess the next lesson is you have to fight to be before Me and those Like Me #rip

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heartorbit · 1 year

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i wanna make a prsk major arcana...

#[knows i wont fucking do that so i post the 1 rough i have instead] all in a days work #project sekai #pjsk #prsk #mizuki akiyama #i posted alternate palettes for this on twitter and i like one of theme way better but im too lazy to get it rn. Lol #i would like to do skecthes for them all but im like ..#um. i dont know snything about tarot so people who DO will see my card assignments and go wtf are they feeding this guy #hermit is easy. pjsk gave that right to me. justice meiko too.#ive decided to pull a revstar and do the 25 card visconti with kagamines in one card. so now i have to reassign with hope charity and faith #boohoo. however the sun emu and the moon mafuyu are staying i know what im about. also kohane with death and an with the lovers #those make me feel like a genius. the rest ill stay shy about. if i say all my assignments ill never feel the urge to draw them #sorry for scheduling these to post at 8am #proseka tarot

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whatevahwhatevah · 3 months

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Sorry for disappearing again, have some more kyman

#kyman #south park #Eric cartman #kyle broflovski #i know i already posted the one on the bottom right but it looks too cute there so…#im sorry for not being active but my mental health is veeeery shitty and social media makes it worse #also im very busy working on commission for another fandom #im reading all your ask and hopefully I will able to answer with more drawing when i can #sorry again i feel awful aaarrgghhhh #I appreciate you guys so much I really do #im sorry im not interacting with any mutual also #ughghhg #aaahhhh #okay now it go #my art

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ladybeug · 1 year

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oh is it valentines day??

#cant believe adrien and marinette are losing the tumblr poll ship war #ladynoir wouldnt go down like this #ladynoir supremacy #my art #miraculous ladybug #ladynoir #its not technically valentines day right now but im posting this now anyways bc im not going to work on it tomorrow

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allastoredeer · 27 days

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Made a bunch of RadioApple collages from screenshots of the show

I stare at them while I write cuz it helps. If anyone wants to use them as drawing references or pictures to stare at while they write too, go ahead!

I just figured they're pretty handy for me, so they mighty be handy for someone else too ^.^

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rohirric-hunter · 1 year

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"This recipe takes about 45 minutes"

"First, soak the potatoes in cold water overnight"

So that's just. lying.

#if im looking for a recipe that takes less than an hour its because right now immediately currently i have less than an hour #and i need to cook something in that time #i dont want your ballpark figure for how much time im going to be actively working on a recipe DINNER IS IN AN HOUR AND I HAVENT STARTED

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trans-axolotl · 5 months

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help me eat for the next month 💜

hey friends. my boss just unexpectedly told us that he's decreasing my hours over the next month and that I can only work 7 hours per week in December. That is nowhere near enough to cover rent and groceries. I also currently am recovering from a broken rib and have to restock my first aid kit, pain meds, etc. I'm trying to see if my old second job will let me pick up some hours in January, but it doesn't look like I'll have any luck for December. I also currently don't have a legal ID or any paperwork, so I can't use the food banks in my neighborhood until I can get another ID. And my university's dining hall is closing because it's end of semester, so I don't have a ton of options right now.

I'm hoping to raise $150 to help with groceries + wound care supplies throughout December and January. anything extra I get will be donated to other friends who have urgent mutual aid posts going around. thank you all so much for your help--i really appreciate the tumblr community for all the support you've shown over the years.

links:

v*nmo: @transaxolotl67

p*ypal: link

$30/150

#personal #idk how to tag things or what tags will cause post to be hidden #trans #trying to remind myself not to be ashamed to ask for help and that this is what community means #also im so pissed at my boss for waiting until RIGHT NOW to tell us this. bc i could have tried to get seasonal work if i knew he was going #to fuck around with our hours this much

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aquickstart · 4 months

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ok sure i'll talk about farleigh start. i'll talk about his tragedy of never being enough as it were and then having to deal with fucking oliver. sure. disclaimer: it's about class (and race) and the horrible reality of the rich. the horrible reality of living as farleigh.

another disclaimer: i'm white! and poc definitely pick up on everything i'm talking about here as it is, and better. i was and am specifically interested in farleigh vs. oliver but it's impossible to examine without considering race. definitely let me know if anything abt this sucks!

farleigh and oliver are similar. it's annoying because every intruder that is not himself is annoying, partly because felix's attention swaying from farleigh is dangerous; there is always a threat of being discarded, even if no precedent existed. the potential is terrifying.

but you'd think he's seen this before, every summer (if venetia is telling the truth) or at least often enough to learn to recognize it fast, so he should know this will pass. part of it is i think still the deep anxiety, and i think he hated every boy that was there before, and it is sort of routine.

but definitely a huge factor in farleigh's annoyance is the fact that he's a biracial (black for cattons, that's all they see) man in a white rich household. he's alert and exhausted all the time. of course he's angry at oliver, regardless of whether he's the first to crash at saltburn for the summer or the fifty-first.

but the important thing is this.

farleigh is very jealous of and angry and pissed at oliver because farleigh sees all the similarities between them. outsider, in financial trouble, whatever it is, in need of cattons; and yet oliver is preferred. and farleigh seems to be the only one to really consider it. felix does not pick up on the hint when farleigh brings up the birthday party vs. his mother. felix's clumsy "different or... anything like that" is as much about race as it is about class, of course. the "we've done all that we can" bit is felix absolving himself of guilt because surely they had, surely the mysterious collective cattons that he's not really part of had tried all they could do. to him, farleigh is different from oliver, because farleigh has been helped. felix is rich and white and twofold uncomfortable with farleigh, even if he's nice about it, even if he genuinely enjoys his company; he doesn't look too close at farleigh because he feels too guilty to come too close. and farleigh can't do anything about it. he can't nice himself into it. the fucking tragedy of him is that he's never enough in the world of the ultra-rich white, even if (especially because!) he's born into it.

farleigh is very pissed at oliver because farleigh also sees all the differences between them. you know who can be nice poor white enough to fit in? fucking oliver. felix says "just be yourself, they'll love you" when oliver first moves in. farleigh was also probably told the same thing, and felix also probably believed that farleigh could just be himself, but even if the cattons were magically not racist at all (impossible), it wouldn't make a difference to farleigh. he would still self-censor, keep in check, be in dangerous waters (because racism is not just about the individual, but about the system). we see that he'd won himself leeway by years of trial and error by the way he speaks to the family, but it's still within the boundaries of acceptable, built by the cattons. he's part of them because they allow it, and farleigh is very, very aware.

the annoying thing is oliver can be himself. like, truly, genuinely, he can just be. and farleigh can't help but envy that.

as a side note, oliver is obviously jealous of farleigh in the beginning as well, because regardless of the reality of farleigh's situation, he was born into it, and hence, at least in oliver's mind, has his position solidified. oliver's whole thing is unquenchable thirst and hunger for whatever and everything the cattons have (including themselves!). he wishes to have been a catton from birth. to oliver, at first, there's nothing farleigh can really do to lose it. and until he figures out the cattons completely, he can't help but envy that.

but i think farleigh senses something different about oliver early on. at least on the level of the text, we have "you're almost passing [for] a real, human boy", which is so important because farleigh is the first to point out oliver's weirdness. the next to do so is venetia in the bath scene calling him a freak, but it's too late. farleigh is too early.

and i like to think he clocks oliver too early because he sees the jagged edges that he recognizes in himself. i think that one other thing that farleigh envies is oliver's freedom to let go. freedom to let go is very similar to freedom to be, but not quite the same.

to be is about perception: farleigh knows he cannot fall out of line, but would like to, and oliver does not have to worry about it at all (i mean, he does, because oliver also performs for felix, but farleigh doesn't know that).

to let go is about the self: farleigh is too scared to even want what oliver eventually does, to even consider the possibility. oliver can let himself want. oliver can let himself act. oliver just can do things and want things. i'm not sure farleigh can.

and so in this scene, when oliver's wants and actions have landed him nowhere with farleigh, felix, venetia, the cattons, of course farleigh gloats. he can let himself do that, because if the cattons are slowly discarding him, farleigh can allow himself this one small victory. he's relieved because despite the dangerous similarities, oliver is, thankfully, not really the same as farleigh, right?

but like. this movie is a love letter to all things gothic. oliver is a white man. he prevails. the brief performance that oliver put on did eventually end up more effective than farleigh's lifetime of constraint. my heart fucking breaks for him to be honest.

the issue that remains is the fact of farleigh's survival. i like to think that oliver came to respect him. oliver is smart, but farleigh is clever. he picks up on everything oliver does (to refer back to the karaoke scene, farleigh immediately retaliates in the cleverest way, in the moment), and he's the only one to do so consistently (venetia, again, for example, comes close, but too late; oliver doesn't like that, there's nothing to work with). hence, stay with me for a little longer, the paradox: farleigh survives because he was never enough for the cattons, but he is very worthy of oliver's attention. in his own freaky way, oliver wants him. look at that.

so. farleigh. farleigh might come back. he always comes back. and i think oliver wants to try harder next time.

#saltburn #farleigh start #i think someone mentioned how the race commentary was fleeting in that scene abt his mom but i disagree #it runs thru the whole movie #because oliver is white and because they're pitted against each other #im not saying its the best commentary ever and also like the movie is not about it at all #but it's there and it's pretty prominent #also on a completely different note can we talk about how oliver correctly assumed everyone at saltburn desires him carnally #dude pulled all the bitches by being strange and off-putting. i mean i completely get it. completely get it. i'd fold so fast you've no ide #also while i was writing i realized that yes indeed both farleigh and oliver perform for felix and its so fascinating #and it works for oliver because of course it does because hes white #anyway! again! let me know if this sucks #in like any way at all #i needed a masterpost of all and every thought i have about farleigh #i think this pretty much covers it so i'll let it go now #HES SO. like do you UNDERSTAND #the DEFINITION of doomed by the narrative but i LOVE that he survives #as he SHOULD #emerald is so right. he does come back and quickstart just torture each other in that house forever. besties for life #god im gonna shut up now this is so horrendously long #mine #saltburn journaling

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reds-skull · 4 months

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Me: damn I feel like painting Soap rn

Me an hour later: but what if I completely fuck him up tho

(inspired by this painting by Zack Zdrale)

#call of duty modern warfare 2 #cod mw2 #cod soap #john soap mactavish #cod fanart #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty #body horror #ok serious note this was originally for like feeling out the vibes of yet another au Im thinking about #it kinda got away from me but I like it #dont ask why he doesnt have a shirt on #'face melting off' isnt an activity you should do with a shirt is my excuse #the patterns on the right side of his face are loosly based on the muscular system #bc I had to reference it for my uni work today and thought 'what if...'#BLOOD||HUNGER #<now that i started posting chapters im going back to tag everything related to the fic

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kokolattx · 10 months

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Ren realizing Angel's type changed for the 5th time this week

#14dwy #14 days with you #14dwy ren #♦my art ig!♦#how does hair work #im off to sleep now!! soon!! i hope i got him somewhat right haha #ren/redacted beloved im so sorry youre going to have to get like a hundred different personalities and each is worse than the last #also i tried out a brush with some more oomph and texture in it!! and added. tons of lines and stuff to the hair idk if its too overwhelmin #anyway sleepy time mimimimi

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