I remember back when I had tik tok and ppl were talking about how everytime they start a job they don't get trained properly and then they end up getting fired because they weren't taught to do anything and the way it's happening to me rn

HAJIME (the yankee) HC (rlly testing what hc means in this case ig)

Okay so my favorite one other than the tattoo artist is flower shop (keep in mind im trying to keep in mind the timeframe the game happens in the best i can. Also that im a filthy American so idk japanese customs for some things heart emoji) Some basics that im not explaining just yet is i dont believe hajimes family is the best off financially, stable enough now but when hajime was younger there was alot more struggle. Id also like to add, My hc that while hajimes mom was japanese, Hajime was born in america and they only moved back to japan when he was 8. Theres reasons to this that tie into the hc above (specifically the fact im not mentioning his father) that ill explain later. I havent found any proof for hajime or tsuginos ages around this time so i imagine theyre 16 --- There was a flower shop owned by this little old woman, only opened during the spring and summer. It was located in a small strip with two other stores beside it, an old building a few feet behind the flower shop, between them was an alleyway where the dumpster for the flower shop sat. A bit far from the exit but she managed. One night when she walked out, there was a boy laying against the dumpster, no older than 12, hands pressed against bleeding wounds and his mouth and he tried to regain enough strength to get home. --- (This is set long before he meets tsugino for knowledge) As we know in canon hajime got into fights, tsugino mentioning this detail when describing hajime early on in tsog, "he would tell me stories on how he had defeated men who had tried go get in his way, or how he had beaten a shoplifter to a pulp... Such unimportant sagas." I imagine he didnt just start that suddenly, it had been going on for a while. And he seems prideful in the fact hes won, so its likely hed never tell tsugino about the losses. The beginning of this headcanons simple, Hajime lost a fight badly, he was over cocky and bit off more than he could chew. what little stuff hed brought was taken from him and he was just left there. The owner of a shop infront of the alleyway had gone to throw away the last bits of trash from the day and had found him groveling, hand covering his mouth to keep the noises of pain as quiet as possible as he was trying to stop the bleeding from some of the more serious wounds. The old lady had brought him into her store quickly, using what she had to help bandage him up. Violence outside wasnt uncommon, but for a young child.. While fixing the young boys wounds she had given a slight lecture about fighting, in response he turned his head away, if it wasnt for the fact he was hurt he wouldve just left. The old woman sighed as she continued working on bandaging his wounds. --- The shop owner continued bandaging the boys arm, but after a spout of silence.... "...who started it?" The woman asked as she knotted the bandage off. The boy didnt look at her for a moment, eyes glued to the floor, worrying his already busted lip between his teeth. It took him a few moments to finally grumble out the answer. "I did.." "Now why would you do that?" The old woman questioned his motives on a whim, she didnt know this boy, but wanted to know non the less. This is where hajime would go silent again, the woman beginning to work on cleaning up his blackened eye. --- The headcanon above comes into play here, hajime did provide an explanation finally, he did it for the money, street fighting had a payout and he was pretty good at it, his mom needed the help but places didnt want to hire a kid. The woman was silent after that until shes gotten him cleaned up. Before she sent him home however she told him to come back to her shop after school the next day. Surprisingly he did. A small loaf of bread in hand aswell, telling her it was from his mother as a thank you for helping him the night before. -- The old woman waved her hand. "Im not in need of that sweetie.. but if youd really like to thank me, could you help me get this display moved? Its hard on my poor bones.." --

he did. Hed help the woman with a few more things aswell. He didnt see the problem with it, despite everything he was taught manners. Once hed finished however she'd handed him an envelope, upon opening it there was money. She told him shed see him again tomorrow. He continued that process until the end of the season, it wasnt an official job persay, the lady explained once that he was being paid under the table, but it was still money. It was still helpful. Hed return the next season, and the next, and the one after that. Soon he was being paid as a normal employee. He didnt stop fighting, often times showing up to work with a few cuts and bruises, a black eye here and there. The woman stopped scolding him after a while, changing to asking if hed atleast won this one. Hajime had stayed working at the flower shop every season until his death. Visiting his grave youd always find new bouquets every week. its important to bring up why i think this fits him The old lady is there because i wantwd him to have mor interaction outside.of tsugino, but i think a job at a flower shop doesn't contrast his personality that much The concept of him being a delinquent but being one of the only people to like tsugino the way he is is very similar to him getting into fights but working at a flower shop for a elderly woman

Back To School Shopping List for A College Freshman Art Student

Hi guys I went to RISD a few years back but I do remember looking up this question. if you're not going to college just yet but are interested in art, it could be super useful to get comfortable using the tools/mediums below. even though i know most teachers give a materials list the first day, i needed to be prepared way ahead of time because of my anxiety. in my case, i was told id get a list in person, but walking in with an empty bag just felt wrong to me lol??? i ended up bringing a couple things, but missed a few vital essentials so here's a list of everything that i can think of. read to the end for my wagon epiphany that i think all art students should adopt (if they havent already)

-a notebook or planner (lined). some professors will hit you with extremely important info right away and wont always tell you to write down what they're saying but 90% of the time its important stuff you dont wanna miss

-a sketchbook. this can help if they throw a quick exercise at you and you have to write/draw something quickly. i blanked and didnt bring a sketchbook from home (because i was told id need to get certain types according to the teacher's specifications) but looking back idk why i didnt?? first days are hectic. actually the first week lol. anyways there were single sheets offered but honestly having your own right off the bat helps for organizational purposes, saves time, and IF YOU'RE LIKE ME, prevents the need to get up in front of everyone

-writing utensils. I'd recommend a nice pen and a set of drawing pencils (doesn't have to be anything crazy cause your teacher will most likely request that you buy more advanced/specific tools later on)

-headphones. every teacher is different, but usually art students will be given little tasks to work on during their first day in class at college. I was not clever enough to remember to pack my headphones, and the silence in a room full of focused art students can be especially unnerving when you're nervous. Hearing a student's questionable music taste can be equally unnerving, so make sure to pack those.

-snacks/drinks. this is kind of a branch off of the last one, cause again it can get sooooo quiet in these classrooms/studios. Pack snacks to prevent belly grumbles. I have heard it happen to many people in my classes and i am a victim as well. stay ready

-sunglasses. seems trivial but super important because you'll probably be walking around outside a lot your first day. this is the typical college commute, up down and around the streets.

-MONEY. I AM GOING TO PUT THIS IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE THIS WAS BY FAR MY BIGGEST MISTAKE LOL. UNFORTUNATELY, STAY STRAPPED WITH CASH OR CARD BCUZ! SOME OF THOSE ART SCHOOL PROFESSORS ARE A LIL BOUJEE AND WILL SEND U RIGHT TO THE CAMPUS ART STORE DAY ONE. It was very overwhelming for me, and some might think its common sense but idk my entire school career you always get some time after school to buy that stuff. they really sent us shopping ten minutes into class so be aware or look broke like i did.

Other than that, all the stuff you'll have to potentially purchase that day will be specified by the teacher. If you're worried about getting the wrong thing, don't be. The students get to go together and the teacher gives very specific details about the products to buy, which the campus store workers are well aware of. Off the top of my head, i remember being sent to get materials for a few different classes throughout the day. I'll list them here without the brand specifics (1. cause i dont know and 2. cause it may not match what your teacher will want anyway) just to give you a general idea.

-large ruler, metal, 1 yard (3 ft)

-clear plastic t-shaped ruler for drawing

-sketchbooks, drawing pads (of all sizes)

-a large portfolio (looks like a gigantic black totebag for big art papers)

-sewing kit

-string

-muslin fabric

-ink pens

-drawing pencils, different sizes

-drawing charcoal

-white paper drawing blender, a good eraser

-a toolbox for the drawing materials

-gouache paint

-brushes, pallets

-oil paint crayons

-a tool box

-ink pens like harry potter

That's pretty much it. If you'd like to grab some of these things before hand it should be fine, but for the most part id stick to waiting just to be safe.

Also a side note: I was a commuter so i could run home and grab my materials collected over my entire life but not every student is this lucky and some of their homes are thousands of miles away. if ur a traveling bird like them, it could be very VERY useful to pack some cool materials and tools like idk holographic paper or a jar of crystals because CAMPUS ART STORES ARE VERY EXPENSIVE!!!!

Also....... i know it sounds a little ridiculous but there were many many times i wished i had bought a wagon to transport things around campus. imagine me with a like 4ft portfolio bag the size of my body, a pencil toolbox, another toolbox for actual tools, my backpack, any projects i may have brought, a coffee if i am holding one??? and god forbid its a rainy day and i needed my umbrella lol.. it looks & feels difficult anyway trying to lug all the stuff art school requires.. so thats just some food for thought. Imagine a cute pink wagon?!??

anyways thats a wrap, have a lovely school year artists!

We Meet Again

Incubus!Erik Stevens x Black PlusSized Female

Another #supersizedfic Halloween fic. I know, I know. It isn’t October yet but I wanted this to jumpstart my writings for it. I definitely want to push out more creepy/scary fics around that month. Let’s call this practice. Also, I’m calling him an incubus but I’m not sure if he fits that category fully in this. Idk. Enjoy!

Song suggestion: Algorhythm by Childish Gambino

"Come on down to Moreen's Super Savin-" The commercial was clipped short as the screen went black. It had to be the millionth time it'd came on in the past two weeks and it was becoming repetitive. The young woman sat the remote on the glass coffee table before she stood. Her adoring pet took that as her cue to hop down as well and follow her owner close.

"How about a snack, Mina? We deserve that right?" She spoke to the puppy as if she'd reply. Well she kind of did with a bark and shake of her tail. Sierra made her way to the fridge and pulled open the freezer. Only to be met with ice trays and frozen meats. Frowning a bit, she looked down to her animal companion.

"Looks like we're out, mamas." Closing the door, she made her way to the dining room table. Grabbing her keys from atop a local Moreen's Super Savings ad paper. She took a quick look in the hallway mirror and made a quick 180 to head up the stairs to her bedroom. "I guess I need something to cover up, huh."

Keys jingled in a hurried dance as she moved, sounding along with the calmed patter of the loyal four little paws. Out of the bedroom once she'd grabbed a hoodie, through the hallway, and down the stairs. Sierra slipped her braids into a bun atop her head, adjusting the silk headband that protected her edges.

Turning to the eager little bichon frise at her feet, she squatted to talk to the puppy. Mina. "Mommy will be back, ok? I'll get us some snacks from the store." She chuckled as Mina barked her reply. With a soft head rub, Mina turned away satisfied as she went back to play with her toys.

Locking the door behind her, Sierra made her way to her car. She was craving vanilla wafers and ice cream. The wind was a bit chilly as she got further from the house, picking up just a little. Fall was slowly making its way and she was amped for the holidays to start rolling in.

With a soft close of the car door, her right index finger pressed the start button to bring the car to life. The time on the radio read twenty minutes until ten o'clock which was just enough time for her to make it before the store's closing. Once she'd set the radio to a slow R&B jam, she was on her way.

A quick ten minute ride was all it took to reach the store since traffic was basically non-existent. Weird but not impossible. She pulled into the nearly empty parking lot without a second thought and turned off the car. "Out and in, two minutes." The words were a mumble as they left her lips, more so a reminder that the store would close soon and she needed not to slow poke.

"Welcome to Moreen's Super Savings." A lone cashier spoke to her as soon as she entered. She smiled with a polite greeting in reply before heading off to the frozen section. Her house shoes made little noise as she found the ice cream selection with ease. A glance to her watch showed she had eight minutes until closing. She had to hurry.

"Hi, how are you?" Her southern hospitality showed as she passed a man that occupied the aisle as well. Not really paying attention to any of his details. Her mission was ice cream, not a man. He gave a polite smile and simple reply, looking over to her once he heard her voice. From her quick glance, she could see his hands were empty though he seemed to be looking for a frozen dessert as well.

The moment between them came and went as she began her quick search once again. "Ah-ha." She spoke the small victory, grabbing the last personal sized vanilla blue bell pint. "Now to the cookies and then something for Mina." With a quick stride she went over two aisles to find the large variety of cookies.

Squatting down to look at the vanilla wafers on the bottom shelf, she saw someone standing at the end of the aisle out of her peripheral. She thought nothing of that as well until a weird feeling fell over her. And the figure was still there. Raising a brow, she looked over to where the figured stood. Or where it should've been. No one was there.

"Hmm." She gave a quick hum of confusion as she stood from her current position. With her choice of cookies in hand. Her head turned both ways to see if she was just imagining things and after seeing that no one was really there, she decided she was. A quick shoulder shrug ended the paranoid thought and she went on her way to get her last items. Coming to the end of the aisle, she stopped to look for the overhead sign to direct her to the pet aisle. Moreen's was kind of new to the town and she had only been here a total of three times, including now.

"Household, paper products, pets." She began her lengthy walk across the store, passing three aisles before she noticed that someone was mirroring her from the other end of the aisles. It could be ignored and pushed aside as a coincidence until she stopped to pretend that her sock needed adjusting. Only for the figure at the other end to stop as well. "What the hell?" She stood quickly to see who was the asshole sending her paranoia through the roof. She knew this store gave off weird vibes. Just as she looked up to see his face, the store went dark and its usual cheery pop songs went silent.

Her gasp was caught in her throat as her grip tightened on the old container of ice cream. She didn't even register the thought of it slowly attempting to escape its containment. Those big brown eyes of hers kept looking to the spot where the man had stood before the power cut.

"Shit." A short curse left her lips as the once frozen dessert made a mess of her hand. Giving one last glance to the spot, she slowly stepped backwards towards the registers before hurrying to it. Her eyes darted around the area to make sure she was still alone as she attempted to rid her hands of the sticky sweet. "There is no way they closed this damn store with me still inside. The cashier literally spoke to me when I walked in the door."

The door.

Sierra discarded the paper towel that was little help as she looked to the large glass double doors. Her exit. She almost scolded herself for getting so worked up, letting her fear of being in the dark affect her sense. Putting pep in her step, she made her way to the door with a quickness. A quick tug to the handle was supposed to ease her heart rate but it sent it soaring. Locked? Why in the hell is it locked? Oh no. She was trapped here, in the dark with her paranoia. Her back turned to press against the doors. "I just had to watch those damn scary movies today."

The dark aisles seemed to mock her as she scanned across them as quick as she could from where she stood. The light that came in from the windows of the store front could only reach so far. With a shivering hand, she fumbled to pull her phone from her pockets. "No, no, no!" She whisper yelled, holding the side buttons to try and make the screen come to life. Only to be met with the screen that told her that her phone was dead. "You were just on fifty percent. How the fuck could you be dead?"

A loud thud from her left caught her off guard, causing her to tense up and her phone to fall to the ground with a soft clap. She looked frantically to the direction of the noise as it's echo sent chills over her. "H-Hello?" Her words stuttered out as she slowly bent to pick up your phone. Maybe it's an employee? "I think you guys locked me in by accident.."

Still like a tree planted by the water, she didn't move. No one answered her call but she had an eerie feeling that she wasn't alone. "Come on, girl. You're stronger than this, remember what Dr. Hamina said.. Fears are nothing more than a state of mind. You're ok." Finally pulling her feet from the invisible glue that held them, she took a slow step forward. "There has to be an emergency door around here somewhere."

In the distance, just barely behind a faraway aisle, those four familiar red letters caught her eyes. "Exit." Hope sparked in her mind and she was happy to know there was another way out. The trick now was getting to the other side without being caught by the man that lurked in the shadows.

As if he'd known she'd thought of him, his voice surrounded her like a cloud. "Sierraaa. Don't be afraid of me, beautiful.." A sudden, single light cut on in the center of the aisles. Close enough to the back that she was directly across the supermarket from him. The soft buzz of the light could faintly be heard from where she stood. She squeezed her phone this time to cope with the fear piercing her as she took another step backwards towards the door.

"How do you know my name? W-Who are you?" She couldn't hide her fear if she wanted to. The waver of her voice gave it away and she hated that it. Because he chuckled at her. His back was to her and she could just make out him looking over his shoulder back at her. In an instant, the light cut out and it was darkness again before a different light popped on. This one was closer than the last but she still couldn't make him out fully. It was only his clothes that gave away his identity as the man that she'd spoken to on the ice cream aisle when she'd came in earlier.

"You don't remember me, sweetness?" He pretended to be offended, finally turning to reveal his face before the lights turned off. It popping back on with him closer. "All the nights we spent together during your college years, just as you were finding yourself. The nights we spent together.. in your dreams, sweetness." That name, that voice. That face.

"E-Erik?" His voice suddenly found its place in her mind. In those memories she'd locked away. "You're not real? H-How are you-? How did you-?"

She'd went through a weird patch in her early stages of youth and adulthood. Her grandmother had called it 'spirit soaring'. The gift ran through the women in her family, but she seemed to be the only one who couldn't keep her control of it. The first few times were innocent during her teen years with short trips around the home for just a minute. That soon crept up to her soul venturing around her neighborhood to see what night could bring. Snowballing into a faint obsession.

Her grandmother had warned her plenty times before of the addictions of her lucid dreaming. But she'd assured herself she could control it. Then she'd met Erik, the man of her dreams, literally. He'd resembled an actor she'd adored and that was his bait. Everything was perfect between the two until it would inch closer to her having to leave him. And he didn't like that, he wanted her company full time. He'd began to find ways to prolong her visits with him.

She began to notice that he wasn't under her control like everything else in her dreams. It honestly scared her. His demeanor changed and he became obsessed with her, finding ways to pull her under when she'd fall asleep. Passive aggressive and manipulating were his sudden traits. The last time she'd seen him ended with a scuffle. Scarring his left eye and her getting away by a hair.

"How I found you?" He spoke her thoughts, finally allowing her to see his face. That familiar scar was healed now. Making him look like a monster from some horror film. "I never lost you, sweetness. I've just waited patiently.. watching you from the shadows..." He took a step towards her, taking in the sweet scent of her fear. "Never..out of..reach."

The lights began to flicker and her adrenaline started pumping. Sierra began to rack her mind for an escape. The exit sign. It was the same escape route she'd use in her dreams long ago. Her feet started their movement before it fully registered in her mind. "Just make it to the door."

Erik's laughter filled the air around her, loud and mocking as she kept her quick pace. "You can run, but you can't hide. Escape is inevitable.." His words were chilling to hear. He really wanted her for himself.

The door seemed to be getting further away. Like she was running backwards. Tears began to gloss her eyes as she became weaker. Her legs were getting tired, but she pressed on. Just make it to the door. Still the door grew smaller with every attempt to reach it.

"Nooo!" Her knees hit the ground below her, meeting the cold tile floor. "It can't end like this.. Leave me ALONE!!" She screamed into the darkness. A last effort to fight her attacker.

The air was still once her echos silenced. Her eyes moved around as best they could in the darkness. The light above her popped on and the slow echo of footsteps in the darkness came towards her. She trembled where she sat, trying to crawl to the door as best she could.

Erik emerged from the darkness like a villain and stopped just before her. "When will you learn sweetness? Running will only tire you out.." He squatted before her, bringing a hand to her cheek to rid it of a stray tear. "Stay with me and we can spend this life together. Happily. Forever."

"This moment.." He spoke lowly, eyes glazed with lust. "I have been waiting for this moment for so long, my sweetness, to have you all to myself.." He rolled his shoulders as he hummed. "..And here we are. Alone, at last. Destined to be brought together as one."

Licking his lips, he held a smirk at the corner of his lips. "Isn't this what we once dreamed for? To be together forever?" His smile widened at her drooping eyes as they fought to stay open. "Well, I did. At least."

Her lips tried to speaks but all her energy was being drained. His voice began to sound distorted to her. She didn't want him to win this time. Have to..stay..awake. Darkness.

"Ma'am? Ma'am? Can you hear me?" The voice was far off in the darkness, barely audible. Sierra fought to make out the words on her mind. Please don't let him win. Her body wouldn't listen to her in her struggle. She screamed internally at herself to wake up, wanting whoever was trying to talk to her know that she could hear them. It seemed to take forever. "There you go. Breathe."

She had shot up to a seated position, breathing heavily and looking around to see if he was still there. Her eyes held worry as she was only met with two E.M.T. and a small group of employees in the distance. The female E.M.T gave an assuring smile to ease her nerves, though it didn't help much. Though it did calm her a little to see a friendly face. "An employee found you laying in the aisle, nearly unresponsive. So we're gonna take you to the hospital and make sure everything is okay. Are you alright with that, hunny?"

All Sierra could do was nod, needing to get out of this damned store. She'd never come back here, that was for damned sure. The medical duo eased her onto a stretcher and gave her a water for her throat. Since she hadn't uttered a word since she came to. "We'll do a few check ups in the truck on the way there. You just let me know if anything feels weird suddenly or hurts. Ok..."

Tears blurred Sierra's vision as she was lifted into the ambulance, listening to the distant sounds of the medical personnel that assured that she would be just fine. Her mouth didn't open and their words didn't register as she looked forward. Not directly looking to the group of employees that watched her being taken away, but more so to what was behind them where he stood. He was relaxed as he watched her with a smirk. His words rung off in her head as she noticed him vanish behind the passing of employees heading back inside. "Alone, at last. Destined to brought together as one.." She was stuck with him forever.

Loke x fem!reader

Idk what this is.

Unedited

What happens if a celestial spirit gets a crush pt one

“LUCY!” you shout and run for her, the magician she was battling was strong, he got the best of her by using dirty tricks. You sent lightning out at the man as you ran, sliding in the mud on your knees as you reached her side “i don't.. Think i have.. Much more in me” she forces out between pants of breath. Taurus was beat, laying on his back a ways off, the magician was cackling in a very unsettling way that made your skin crawl, if you were being honest you didn't have much left either but you weren't going to stop, you could not quit.

You stood and screamed, your last ditch effort to cause some damage, you slam your hands together, lightning shooting from your fingertips, pouring the last magical energy you had stored into a ball of lightning, pushing out more than you had to give causing your nose to start bleeding, and as you fall to your knees, the sound you hear as the steam and dust clears, is the same laughter.

You let out one strangled chuckle that morphed its way into a sob when you saw the magician had used his powers to catch your blast, pouring his energy in it to send back at you. You glanced back at Lucy, who was now on her back in the mud, the rain washing the blood and dirt from her unconscious face, and it was like the world went in slow motion for you. You saw every raindrop falling, pause in the middle of the air, his laughter slowed down and your heartbeat in your ears slowed it’s erratic beats. You move to stand as his magical blow flies through the air, but when your knees shook and fear struck you, you almost thought you would die.

Until a man appears in front of you, dismissing the blow like it was nothing, before turning and looking at Lucy behind you, a look of worry in his eyes, before they landed on you, widening slightly as they took you in. blood flowing out one side of your nose from pushing yourself too far, wide e/c eyes that looked at him with respect, who were you? He didn't understand how someone could look so incredibly beautiful while being so beat. Your eyes were squinting as they looked up at him through the rain, you’d say something if you had any more energy. he nods once before standing up, his back to you as he speaks “Thank you, whoever you are, for fighting beside Lucy. I have this now. Move back, check on her if you can” you nod and turn, crawling over to Lucy as you heard the fighting began.

Once you make sure she is okay, breathing with a strong heartbeat, you fall back on your butt as you watch this stranger in a suit easily take down this powerful magician. When the battle is over, and the rest of Lucy’s team find their way back to you both, it feels like it all happened so quickly, and you weren’t really sure what was going on until the guy in the suit crouched in front of you slowly “hey are you okay?” his voice was gentle and it felt like your soul snapped back into your body “what?” you asked, your ears felt like cotton had been pulled from them. “Are you okay?” you look to your side and notice that Lucy has been taken away somewhere, your eyes go back to the man “i’m okay. Where is she?” he reaches out, a wet cloth in his hand to wipe away your nose which has stopped bleeding. “She was taken to a doctor then she will rest at your inn until she can travel again. Are you sure you’re okay?” you cock your head at him and then you realize the rain had stopped “who are you?” you ask, “and what happened to everyone?”

“My name is Loke. I am a celestial spirit. Lucy is my Magician. They are waiting back at the inn. I sent them away and told them i’d bring you back. Are you okay?” your eyebrows furrow, that was the third time he asked you that “why do you keep asking me if i’m okay?” you study his face, it was cute, his eyes held strength, and you couldn't help but notice how good he looked with wet hair, although his glasses were covered with water droplets. “Miss, you’ve been sitting here for a long time, you’re shivering, you’re bleeding, and you haven’t seemed to want to stand at all. I’m just worried” he wasn’t just worried, he felt drawn to you for some reason, he couldnt put his finger on the reason, but he did think you looked like a fallen angel here in the mud.

You go to stand, in spite of his words, but you stumble, your knees giving out but you fall into his waiting arms. You look up at him and he smirks, so to say ‘told you’ you sigh “so maybe i wasn’t so okay after all. It felt like the world went so quickly, I didn't even notice anything happening after I sat here. How long ago was that?” he helps you to stay on your feet “40 minutes give or take” you laugh “I put a lot of me into that last shot” he chuckles “I know, i felt it when he threw it back at you” he begins to help you walk back the road down to the village “you felt different magic in it?” you ask and he nods “I could tell how much of it was yours and how much of it was his, it was 90 percent you. I think his last ditch effort was to catch it” your hand snakes its way sound his waist to help you stay steady and he holds you up, his arm around your back and hand on your hip.

“Why didn't you have someone from fairy tail help me?” the honest truth was that he wanted to be near you. He knows he should have had Gray or Natsu help you, but he couldn't resist. “I wanted to help you after you helped Lucy” you nod, confused at the way your heart twisted painfully. Like knowing this is all the time you will have with him, hurt your heart. He helps you back to your room where you find a hot bath waiting for you. You turned, the small room seemed like heaven, the others must have said something for you, you felt warm in your soul. When you looked back to Loke, he seemed like he wanted to say something. You tilt your head, your hand on the foot of the bed to keep your balance. “You never told me your name” he says and you chuckle, sending a smile his way that made his skin erupt in goosebumps “y/n. y/n l/n. I was guildless for a long time, I just joined Fairy Tail last week.Lucy offered for my first mission to be with them so I could get the hang of it.” he nods, it makes sense why he doesn't know you now. He nods once and then turns to go “i should. I should get going now” he says and you panic “wait!” he turns back, his eyebrows raised and you sigh, getting a little worked up as you say “oh this is gonna sound stupid, I know celestial spirits, I understand how it works. I think I already know the answer.. But ..” your voice softens and you smile hopefully “can i see you again sometime?” his smile sends fire through your veins and he takes a step towards you “I would like that. I will see what I can do” and with that, his gate closes and he disappears.

querencia (jang han seo)

🎤 hello and gather around fellow himbo lovers, here is a small fic about our beloved and his life after That guy kicks the bucket. also idk how i managed to turn this into a love story? anyways lmfao, hope y’all enjoy! 

Everything felt so different.

Truthfully, Han Seo never imagined what his life could be like, would be like, without the proverbial ever tightening noose around his neck. One that had been unexpectedly and disappointingly placed on him as a child by the one person that was supposed to remove such things. He was now free of that person, and the fear that stemmed from veering off the path set by them, but wasn’t entirely too certain that he was free of that feeling. 

His muscles couldn’t shake it. The sudden chill to the bone, the anticipation of retaliation from an act that hadn’t yet occurred. Such an act that could never occur anymore given that his brother was dead. He knew this, but his mind had never been good at accepting possibilities that were positive. 

This much was evident in the case of his relationship with Vincenzo. There was no reason why the stoic yet baby faced Mafia member would want to keep him around, at least not any that he could see. So, Han Seo spent the first few weeks asking the question both silently and aloud, will you kill me? Vincenzo had the motive, it’s not exactly like his hands were clean in his previous dealings with Babel, and he most certainly had the means.

It wasn’t until Han Seo was told that because he was trying to make amends, he wouldn’t end up in the Jang family crypt well before his time that he started to feel at ease. Still, for months after that conversation, he still had the nagging feeling that some invisible fist was lurking around every bend. 

Regardless of that, Han Seo decided he would not waste his liberation however short lived it might have been. He made up his mind that he was going to do all the things that he was either too scared or outright forbidden to do before. The first thing on his list was to clean up his business. Luckily for him, the Guillotine file made it easy to weed out the snakes in the grass and allow him to steer Babel in the direction that the core of the business was about. 

The hardest part was going to be restoring the public’s faith in the organization. Cha Young told him as much, and advised him not to agonize over it as there will be new corruption that will grab their attention (and hers). He intended to be the Chairman that such a company deserved, and therefore continued to study no matter how nonsensical and outdated the information seemed. 

The second order of business was moving out of the place that felt more like a prison than a home to one that he liked. The realtor immediately recommended a few luxury places, but he turned them down to their surprise. Maybe it was due to the fact that he had seen what the quest for material wealth had done to his family (or more realistically because he wanted to be closer to newfound hyung  and his girlfriend). 

Either way, the house he settled on had its luxuries, but in a more affordable and quaint neighborhood. Han Seo even went as far as to attempt painting on his own, which went as well as expected for someone that didn’t even know the difference between a brush and a roller. 

Being able to do what he wanted proved to be chaotic at times. There was no one to stop him from going on last minute trips to Jeju just for oranges and a quick dip into the ocean. Or to take away all the sweet and savory snacks that he found at these things called convenience stores. 

He would stay up all night sometimes, not to binge watch all the shows he missed out on, but just to sit in silence. He didn’t know that the quiet could be so nice. That it was a space of tranquility and relaxation rather than one filled with anxiety. Of course, Han Seo more often than not regretted the choice not to sleep and ended up at the cafe a few blocks from his place. 

While obviously no one had better coffee than the one at Babel, he found himself going to the cozy spot with increasing frequency because of her. The first time he saw her, she was deciding on which apple to choose from the basket beside the register. He then noticed that her canvas bag was filled with art supplies, and decided that it was a brilliant idea to draw a conclusion. 

I think the one to the right would make a great subject on paper, he grinned. 

She stared at him in a way that made him contemplate whether to not she was related to Vincenzo hyung before replying flatly:

I’m looking for the tartest one to go with my tea. 

He was left a bumbling mess of flustered sounds and rapidly blinks, not getting the opportunity to insert some retort that undoubtably would’ve put him deeper into the realm of idiot. 

The following morning he went again. No cup of coffee, not even the ridiculously overpriced espresso at Babel, would give him that jolt of electricity he felt under her gaze. And sure enough, she was there. This time her apple sat upon a folded napkin right beside her tea, and in front of them both was her sketchpad. On the page? A picture of the fruit. He couldn’t control the noise of exasperation that left him as he passed her table. On his way out he tossed over his shoulder with a grin so wide it hurt:

Nice drawing. 

Their interactions continued in that same vein. Short, filled with just the right amount of bite. The balance of who had the best and last say constantly shifting, becoming somewhat of a competition. 

You’re outside today, is that weed your subject?

As if there weren’t enough clowns in this neighborhood already.

You buy a lot of lattes for an artist that’s supposed to be starving.

Ironic coming from the gentrifier walking around a working class neighborhood in thousand dollar shoes.  

He had look up what that g word meant after their last exchange.

There was something else he never got to do in his past. Sure, Han Seo had the occasional date or two, but commitment? That was out of the question. It wouldn’t have served his brother well if there was anyone around that would motivate him to step out from his hold. The realization that he never had a serious relationship hadn’t hit him until he started to have inconvenient thoughts during board meetings about stuff like taking a long afternoon stroll, and holding hands with her.

Han Seo could barely focus on the stack of jargon dense reading before him. He sent Vincenzo a text saying that he was coming over with soju, not waiting for a reply before making the short journey to Geumga. Cha Young’s face fell when she answered the door, muttering that she thought he was her delivery, but lit up once she saw he brought along alcohol. After poking around the rice he begged for them to share and sighing loudly for half an hour, Vincenzo ushered him out. He implored him to get a hobby so that these late night visits wouldn’t become a habit.  

He was confused by that. Weren’t studying and running a company hobbies? On his walk back home he spotted a flyer that someone was offering private classes for beginners painting. The nightmare of a time he had trying to get the walls in his kitchen evenly colored popped up in his brain, instantly making him tear off one of the numbers. He didn’t exactly know how learning to paint homes was going to be a practical hobby, but hell, he would have something to show Vincenzo later. 

While he was on one of his impromptu trips to the seaside, Han Seo had his assistant set up the class for him to take when he returned. As a gift for the instructor, he thought it would be nice to bring them an extra bag of oranges. If the session sucked, or if he hated it, at the very least there was going to be something to brighten the mood. 

The day he got back, he even went as far as to tidy up the place on his own and put some fresh flowers around so the air was lightly scented. He practically waited at the door until the alarm sounded to let him know that his instructor arrived. 

Is this a joke? She huffed.

No, I didn’t even know you were the teacher! His protest was adamant. I was on a trip and even brought back Jeju- He paused. Han Seo knew he wasn’t the brightest, but bringing up the oranges seemed like it would upset her given their previous history. 

You brought back what? Her brow raised.

Mmm, good energy! Don’t you feel the vibes from the ocean? He spread his arms wide. 

Han Seo waved her inside hurriedly, trying desperately to get past the awkward exchange. Of all people, he never would’ve thought it would be the neighborhood’s cute sass machine. A small noise of happiness couldn’t be stopped from escaping him as she accepted the invitation. Her eyes scanned the place without restraint, nose wrinkling when she took a look at the kitchen. 

Where are your supplies? A slender finger ran across the surface of his counter. 

Supplies? He thought that was included in the price for the lessons. 

She sighed, placing a sketchbook, brushes, and small pots of paint onto the table. It was now very apparent to him that the advertisement did not mean what he thought it did. Thank goodness he also didn’t decide to open his mouth about that beforehand, it probably would’ve made her smack him with her bag. 

Here, the materials were slid over when he sat. Paint something.

His facial expression surely mirrored what he was thinking. Han Seo had no recollection of ever trying to do this, not even during the course of his way overpriced private school education. She urged him on with a nod, only relaxing into her chair when he flipped open the book and picked up a fine brush. 

There was nothing in particular he wanted to paint. Hell, he didn’t even know if he wanted to paint at all. This was simply something random that came up when he needed it. 

To avoid being chastised, he dipped his brush into the light blue color and started swiping randomly across the blank page. He swapped the brush and added some dark green, then pink, and finished if off with small dots of white. At the end it looked like something a toddler would’ve considered a masterpiece. She eyed it with surprising interest. 

You clearly didn’t know what you wanted to achieve with this, or why you were doing it at all. 

Han Seo was about to interject with a prideful defense before she continued. 

That’s good. It’s better to work with an unbiased mind. Her eyes met his. Your technique is shit though. 

He laughed, like truly laughed. It was a full bellied, unashamedly loud, attack of sonic waves. She seemed to find it amusing, a hint of a smile dancing across her lips. 

Alright, let’s start with how to actually hold a paintbrush. 

There was no telling when their interactions had gone from less than playful banter to warm and friendly (still with a side of joking). Han Seo couldn’t put his finger on it. Did it happen during the second lesson where he mistakenly put paint on her hands, and didn’t settle for no when he said he would wash them off for her? 

Or was it the time he was running late for work, but the barista already had his order prepared because she told them that he was on the way? Perhaps it was the time she had to reschedule their Saturday morning for the evening instead, and all he could think about was trying to replicate the color of her alcohol flushed cheeks onto the page before him. 

Han Seo had never done the whole confession thing before, so he wasn’t sure about how it worked. An unfamiliar kind of anxiety crept up his spine as he poured glasses of wine and organized a fruit plate. Soft music played in the background accompanied by the crackle of the expensive candles he bought specifically for the occasion. Her mouth parted slightly as she took everything in once she arrived for what was supposed to be an ordinary session involving watercolors. 

Wow, got a hot date later or something? Her legs seemed to automatically take her to the table. 

Actually, He brought the glasses over to where she sat. It’s for you. 

Oh…She gasped. A few seconds passed that felt more like minutes before she picked one up and held it high. Cheers then!

Something about it made him feel like he made a mistake. Did he misread their change in demeanor towards one another? Was she truly just being kinder to him because she considered him to only be a friend? Han Seo tried to not let the embarrassment he felt seep into the room, keeping a smile locked and loaded for when she made a witty remark about stuff like him painting in the most inappropriate white button down. 

Don’t you have something to say to me? She quipped, neatly putting her things away after he finished. 

Me? I- no…I... He clenched his fists. Why couldn’t he come out and say it?! This was as good as a chance as he was ever going to get. If he let this opportunity slip, he wasn’t sure if there would be one again. He had to act, he had to-

What sounded like a small growl came from her as she raked her hand through her hair. She pulled him closer by the collar of his shirt, her nose just shy of rubbing against his. 

Jang Han Seo, when are you gonna stop driving me insane? She murmured, labored breaths dancing across his cupid’s bow. 

If only she knew how true and reciprocated that question was to him too. From the moment he couldn’t fight against thoughts about her entering his mind, to the smile she wore when he stepped across his threshold, and the way she said his goddamned name, it was all enough to make him want to combust. To burst out of his skin, transforming into something or someone else entirely. A person that fully accepted that there were no more restraints on their lives, that they was no more fear and no more betrayal. Someone that was completely in control, and free to take what was theirs. And so he did. 

It was painful, almost, the first time he kissed her. The second time even more so. By the third time, coupled with the question of her tongue prodding at his bottom lip, Han Seo had shedded the last of his previous being. He cupped her face, thumbs toying with her curled sideburns as he consumed her. Quiet whimpers made way for desperate cries, shivers were replaced by the searing heat of skin on skin. 

The high he’d chased fruitlessly so many times throughout his life was finally achieved with his arms wrapped tightly around her, their bodies pressed together as she shuddered and sighed his name. He was in disbelief that what he had experienced was real, so he chased it again and again, receiving the same result each time his sweat slicked forehead bowed to meet hers. 

Han Seo would learn that it could be obtained outside of that space they filled with the tangible evidence of their desire. It was also in buying melon flavored ice pops to eat in the park together on sunny days. The look on Vincenzo and Cha Young’s face when he timidly made the introduction. Her expression when she took her first bite of Hee Soo’s tteokbokki. When Mr. Nam and her had an hour long debate on which shade of red made the most realistic fake blood color. The flashing Best Chairman Ever coming from her phone when Babel secured their biggest deal yet without any dirty deals behind the scenes. 

That feeling, one that outshone the other by such a long shot that it was nearly eradicated, had been there all along in the life he’d made. She just helped him see it.  

Crowley x Reader x Lucifer

Part 1

*Based loosely around 12x15 but Ramsey kills Gwen and gets away

Word Count: 2.6k

Trigger Warnings: Injured animal? Idk? If you think something should be added to the TW list drop a comment or DM me

Summary: Humans aren’t supposed to see hellhounds, so what happens when y/n finds an injured hellhound and brings it home to care for? 

*Disclaimer* Lucifer will be introduced in the 2nd part which should be up by Saturday 4/3/2021

It was almost midnight when y/n got off of work. She was exhausted after her shift at Regional West Medical Center in Nebraska. As she trudged through the parking lot to her old, beat up 2002 Suzuki she couldn’t help but feel eyes on her, like something was watching her from out in the darkness. Fumbling with her keys she turned to unlock the driver’s side car door (The remote to unlock the door was broken. The car could only be opened with the actual key.), only to freeze in place when she felt the hot breath and heard the heavy breathing of some sort of animal behind her. “Dear god, please let it be my overactive imagination.” she prayed silently, knowing it was no use. Whatever stood behind her was very much real.

Very slowly she turned to face whatever it was that was sniffing her, her keys moving between her middle and ring finger in case she needed to defend herself. Instead of being met with what she thought for sure would be a small bear or a rabid coyote, she was met with a very large dog. A very large dog that looked like it had been through absolute hell. Its fur was matted and caked with dried mud and dirt, and it was covered with cuts and what she naturally assumed was its own blood. It was hard to tell through the thick, matted fur but it also looked very underweight. “Oh you poor baby….” Y/n’s heart melted upon seeing the creature.

Obviously the dog had been out on its own for a very long time. Y/N took pity on it. It seemed so sad, and it didn’t appear rabid or vicious. It looked like it just wanted help. Reluctantly she reached down to check for a collar. There was a collar but it was in a foreign language. One she’d never seen before. Unlocking the back of the car she coaxed the dog in with some leftover food she had from her lunch break. She knew the poor thing must be starving. Being hurt it took a little help getting in. Little did she know how dangerous that dog really was or that there was a man out right now searching for it.

The K-9, which y/n decided to call (Dog’s name) had fallen asleep on the car ride home, snoring softly over the radio that was playing some Green Day song. Pulling into the driveway, (Y/N) stopped the car and turned off the radio. Almost on queue (dog’s name) looked up to see where they were. A light was on outside, illuminating a large porch (Which could probably use a new paint job, if we’re being honest) with 2 rocking chairs, a small table and a plethora of healthy, brightly colored plants. She picked up the injured dog and carried it inside, planning on taking it to the vet in the morning to see if it was microchipped.

She was going to let the dog sleep in the basement for the night, unsure if it would destroy the house or not. She remembered her aunt’s German Shepherd who took pleasure in tearing up sofas, and eating her plants. The dog also really needed a bath and she didn’t want it on the furniture until it got one. Unfortunately around 3:30 am, y/n felt a dip in the bed and then something making itself comfy by her feet. Looking over, she found the dog curled up in bed with her. Way too tired to deal with it now, and knowing she had to wash the sheets anyway she just fell back asleep let the dog stay with her so long as it stayed at the foot of the bed.

~

The next morning, Y/N got up early to go to the pet store and get stuff for the dog. She called up the local vet, making an appointment, she washed the sheets, and most importantly she began trying to wash (Dog’s name). At first the dog resisted, wanting absolutely nothing to do with the water. Y/N knew exactly how to deal with this though. Placing a glob of peanut butter on the side of the tub to keep the dog preoccupied, (Dog’s name) happily entered the bathtub. A trick y/n had learned from that aunt with the poorly behaved German Shepherd. By the time y/n was done with the dog she’d had to drain and refill the tub 3 times before she gave up and kept it drained, just using the shower head. She couldn’t believe how much blood and dirt had come off this dog.

Around 2pm the doorbell rang and this dog who was once so sweet, albeit a bit skittish turned into an absolute beast. Running to the door, loud deep barks and growls left it. The dog seemed ready to tear the stranger on the other side of the door to shreds. It was almost like it had turned into a completely different dog. “(Dog’s name)!!!” Y/n shouted as she raced down the stairs after it, hoping to get to the door before the dog did. “NO!!!” She yelled. Even hurt and underweight, (Dog’s name) was really big. If it wanted to break that door, it probably could. Without thinking, Y/n quickly grabbed the dog by the collar to stop it. “I said no!” She told her firmly with a pointed finger. The dog whined, tail between its legs as it hurried back up the stairs to the bedroom to do that thing dogs do when they roll around on the rug to dry themselves.

The front door had a glass window looking out so y/n could see the stranger. He was short, and wore a nice suit. He seemed only slightly concerned about the interaction. The man didn’t even flinch as the massive hound lunged itself at him. It seemed like this was a normal day for him. Actually, he seemed more unnerved after she called the dog off. Opening the door, y/n apologized profusely for the dog “I am so sorry about the dog! I-” Before she could continue, the man squinted at her, clearly confused about something. “What are you?” He questioned in an English accent.

“Hellhounds? Really?” She questioned with a quirked eyebrow and a small grin, crossing her arms and constantly turning to keep facing the man. It was obvious she didn’t believe him.

Obviously his question confused y/n as she gave him a look of confusion back “What do you mean ’what are you?’” She stepped out onto the porch, closing the door behind her “I'm human”

“Yes, really.” The man continued, as serious as a heart attack “You especially shouldn’t be able to control that bitch. I’ve only ever known one person to be able to control Ramsey and you and not that person.”

“Oh really? And who might that person be then?” Y/n asked, beginning to think this was some elaborate prank being played on her by a friend or coworker.

Remembering what the demon said about her being able to control the hound, y/n gave it a shot. Raising a hand she firmly commanded “Ramsey stay.” Not only did the dog stop dead in her tracks, she laid down and waited for further orders. Now most people would be a little freaked out by this; finding a hellhound that they didn't know was a hellhound, and now being visited by a demon sent to collect said hound. Y/n however wasn’t afraid. Actually she kind of got a Déjà vu feeling at this.

“No you can’t be. Humans can’t see hellhounds, much less control them.” Normally Crowley would just collect the demonic hound and leave, with humans being none the wiser that the rogue canine was even there, but not only did this woman know the hellhound was there, she was taking pretty good care of it. Even stranger, the dog was letting her care for it. There was something different about this woman, something special. He just wasn’t sure what it was yet. Crowley circled y/n, inspecting her. He was trying to find any indication of her not being human.

“Lucifer.” Crowley responded

At that, y/n was done. “Look pal, I don’t know what kind of kool-aid you’re drinking but I’m not buying it. Now’s the part where I tell you to get off my property.” she turned to go back inside, closing and locking the door behind her. As she turned to head upstairs though, Crowley was standing right behind her, his eyes red. She let out a screech, jumping as far back as she could (Which wasn’t far as the door was right behind her). Again, the dog that the demon in front of her called ‘Ramsey’ came running to her defense.

~

“The name’s Crowley. King of hell.” He introduced himself “May I ask who you are?”

“Y/n y/l/n.” she responded before telling him “Queen of this house.” This was crazy. Y/n was standing in her entryway conversing with a demon king. “Could I offer you tea ‘your highness’? Maybe Coffee?" she asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm as she addressed Crowley as 'your highness' She wasn’t gonna hand over the dog so easily, and something told her the demon wouldn’t be leaving without Ramsey.

“.....Who are you?” Y/n asked the man

Y/n and Crowley sat in her kitchen, sipping tea and chatting. “Why aren’t you afraid of me?” The demon who sat across from y/n questioned “Most people would run, or beg for mercy if a demon showed up at their doorstep. Not invite them in for a drink.”

~

If it weren’t for the fact that y/n could sick Cujo on him at any moment, Crowley wouldn’t be being so patient with her. He wouldn’t be trying to convince her to send the dog to her death. “I’m sorry but I can’t let you take that dog back.” Y/n told Crowley. For some reason she felt bonded to that dog, with the overwhelming need to protect her.

“I’m afraid I must insist. She’s dangerous and unpredictable. It’s for the best that she be put down. She’s killed a lot of people who weren’t on hell’s hit list while she was topside.” Crowley explained “A pup like that out and about isn't good for business. It makes it look like I’m not in control.”

“Do you want me to beg for mercy?” Y/n asked with a smirk and a small, dry chuckle. “Sorry but you’re not very scary so forgive me if I’m quaking in my shoes.” She would never be seen begging for mercy. Not in a million years.

“I thought you were the king down there.” Y/n questioned “A king answers to no one. You could turn, walk right out that front door, and pretend she vanished. That you weren't able to find her. Or you could go back and tell your people she attacked you and you killed her. Besides, you’re a demon. You don’t really care about the people she’s killed, do you?” Y/n definitely cared and felt bad, she just didn’t believe Crowley did.

“The Winchester’s. They hunt monsters. Vampire’s, werewolves, demonkind, et cetera.” Crowley explained “They’re ruthless, and if they find out that dog is here they will show up and kill her. Painfully. If you hand her over I promise her death will be a painless and merciful one.” Of course he would make the boys sound worse than they were. In reality they’d kill it as quick as possible if they could. He’d say anything to get her to give up Ramsey. 

“Of course I don’t, but some hunters I know care a lot about the people that were killed. If I don’t collect this dog, they’ll come and collect her for me and they’ll be far less inclined to sit and chat over hot beverages.” Crowley explained

“Tell me about these hunters.” Y/n asked, genuinely interested. "I assume you're not referring to people who shoot buck in their free time."

“Let them come.” Y/n spoke after quietly mulling over what was just told to her. Whether she was underestimating these hunters or just didn’t believe what Crowley was telling her he was unsure. “She may be in a weakened state now but she’ll get better. She’ll get stronger and when she does I’ll be the only one who can stop her. If they show up, I’ll be ready and they’ll have to go through me. When they get through me, she’ll be ready for them too.”

“Y/n I know you think-” Y/n cut off the demon king, her patience wearing thin. She had all the leverage she needed in this situation and she knew it “You said I was the only one who could control her. Now I don’t know how or why that is, but that means there’s nothing stopping me from sicking the dog on you. If she really is as vicious and dangerous as you claim she is, I would be afraid of the one person who can send her after you. I’m telling you to walk away. I’m giving you an out. I strongly suggest you take it.”

Thinking about it later though, she was actually kind of sexy. She knew she held the power and the leverage in that situation and she knew how to use it. Not only that but she was bold enough to try and intimidate not just any king, but the King of Hell. And she didn’t need to raise her voice once while doing it. She was clearly a strong, intelligent, woman. He liked that.

~

After he was gone, y/n was in fact a little freaked out. If there was a hell that meant there was a heaven. Would she be going to hell just for harboring this animal? And better question; how do you even properly care for a hellhound? She imagined it would be a lot different from taking care of your average, run of the mill Pitbull.

Crowley stood his ground, calling her bluff. He didn’t believe she would actually do it. “Ramsey!” Y/n called “Ramsey c’mere girl!” she whistled as the Hellhound came barreling from upstairs “Ramsey, hurry up! Go get him! Get the demon!” Y/n told Ramsey in the same sickeningly sweet baby voice most humans use to talk to animals they find cute. Before she could get to him though, Crowley had disappeared into thin air.

After hours spent searching on the internet y/n got her first lead. Okay so it wasn’t really a lead. It was more of an idea. It’s not like she could just log onto wikipedia and pull up a page on 'How to take care of a Hellhound'. She did however find instructions for summoning and trapping a crossroads demon. She didn’t realize there were different types of demons but to her, a crossroads demon was still a demon so good enough right?

Late that night y/n put Ramsey in the car with her and drove to the nearest crossroads. Spray painting a ‘devils trap’ in the road she buried a box in the center. It contained a photo of her, some graveyard dirt, and the bone of a black cat. No, she didn’t go out and kill a cat. She was able to get that from a wiccan shop on the outskirts of town.

After burying the box, she stood and read the incantation she had written on a scrap of paper “Daemon, esto subjecto voluntati meae!” She waited a moment and when nothing happened she thought she might've gotten a word wrong. That was until she heard a woman speak behind her “What can I do for you tonight?”

Jumping a bit she turned to face the demon. “I just need some information.”

.....To be continued....

Notebook Shocker: Mafia!Kaminari x Quirkless!Fem!Reader

Bruh its like 6am. I started this at 1am. Idk how writers do it. im drained af and probably spelt shit wrong but thats what edits are foooor. 

Mafia!Kaminari x Quirkless!Fem!Reader

Warnings: A lil torture, violence, and mafia stuffff

Plot : A certain mobster had caught you stealing 

Word Count: 5.8k

“What do you mean….someone took it?” Deku groaned in annoyance, fiddling with a pen behind his desk. His green eyes scanned over Kaminari’s sheepish stance, “That notebook has a lot of intel, if that gets in the wrong hands I won’t know what I’m going to do to you,” Deku continued, a sharp glare adding to the threat.

“I know, I know! Don’t worry about it boss, I’m gonna get it back. I saw who took it,” Kaminari explained, “I just wanted to let you know, I can track her down. How far can a little girly get?” He grinned as he rubbed the back of his neck. He knew he pissed off Deku but in a way he wasn’t too concerned yet. He just had to get that notebook back, and that would mean having a little chase with the girl who he saw last night.

“I don’t care who has it or how you get it back. I want that notebook, and bring her too! I wanna know who’s after it,” Deku ordered before waving his hand to dismiss him.

Giving a small head bow, Kaminari excused himself to go save that notebook. He didn’t know what was in there, but he knew it had to be important to rile up his boss that much. Walking down the halls of the hideout, he quickly made his way to the dinning hall where he knew his friends would be. Not minding the few bodyguards who nodded his way, Kaminiari pushed open the tall doors to the grand room and smiled over to his pals, Kirishima and Mina. “Guys! I may or may not have gotten myself into a bit of a situation,” He chuckled and took a seat at one of the seats across from them.

“What did you get yourself into this time bro?” Kirishima smirked looking up from the playing cards as Mina also took interest in the conversation. “I lost the notebook, the one Deku wanted,” He started which had already caused a worried look onto the duo’s faces across from him.

“Dude not cool, that had all the intel on certain politicians,” Kirishima sat up straighter, “Yeah, wasn’t Deku going to use that to bribe one of them to fund us?” Mina added into which Kaminari froze up.

“Wait, that notebook? Why would he make me in charge of that? Why not Todoroki or Bakugo?” Kaminari whined realizing how much worse this situation was and put his head to the table letting out an annoyed groan.

“Because they aren’t here at the moment! Duh! He sent them to go do something else like a week ago? You’re so daft Kami!” Mina teased but she looked a little worried for her friend who was now toying with the dinning cloth on the table.

“Let’s go, Kaminari, I’ll help you,” Kirishima began, to which Kaminari lifted his head with a relieved grin,”Really? Aw you’re the best,” The blonde responded happily and stood up with hope in his eyes. He did not want to stall much longer knowing Deku would lose it if he was still here and not out looking for that book.

“Good luck guys! Just remember to stay low! Deku doesn’t want any more loud operations! He’s still fixing the last screw up,” She reminded them. The boys simply nodded giving her a quick goodbye before heading out quickly to their cars.

---------------------

Gripping onto the notebook tightly which you had stolen last night, you sat on your couch eyeing the cover of the simple black book. It was a simple job really, but something felt off. It was too simple. You weren’t a rookie when it came to stealing things, petty robbery and pickpocketing being your job after all, but you weren’t a professional. So why did someone like Shigaraki have you do a job for him. 

He hadn’t even asked you himself. One of his henchmen had asked you if you were interested in a job.

“It’s a quick and easy task! Just pop right in and grab a notebook, that’s all we need,” The man who introduced himself as Mr. Compress explained. “We just need someone with not much background, someone who doesn’t look suspicious,” He added on when you had asked why they wanted someone like you to do the job when they had many capable people of their own. “We will pay half now, half later,” Was the final deal breaker.

Surely you could have refused something like this but when he had pulled out a few wads of cash, your eyes had grown big at the sight and agreed. He wasn’t lying about it being easy either. You dressed fairly casual that night and went to the location he gave you. It was a small apartment building tucked away at the end of the big city with not many people around either. It was perfect.

You managed to climb up the building’s fire escape and perched yourself carefully onto the railing of the outside door to the apartment number. The lights were out and it was silent as well. Quickly grabbing the lockpicks tool out from your back pocket, you made easy work of the sliding glass door before letting yourself inside the home.

“Whoever must live here must be whack,” Were the first words to leave your lips as you looked around at the decorations and trinkets.It wasn’t fairly messy but there was nothing that matched. It just looked like a collection of things spewed out here and there. Quickly getting to work, you started rummaging through the living room, but only found video games, weed, and instant meal packages here and there. Letting out a huff, you made your way to the bedroom and started pulling out drawers, digging through the closet, and finally lifting the bed sheets and mattress to the side to find a small black notebook tied to a shoebox. 

“Found you,” You sighed in relief, “Was about to think you weren’t here,”. Untying it from the shoebox, you straightened yourself out before you heard the keys rattling and the doorknob jiggling from the front room. “Shit!” You cursed and quickly looked to his bedroom window. Rushing over to it, you unlocked it with a click, looking down to see that there was a little balcony below you.

“Hello?” You heard from the front room, a concerned male’s voice as footsteps got closer to the bedroom you didn’t have the time to think or look back as you made the decision to jump down, landing with a bit of a thud against the metal flooring before jumping down from that balcony as well. It was a lie to say it didn’t hurt the soles of your feet.

“Hey! Get back here girly!” Was all you heard from him before you took off running, the sound of something hitting the ground with a zap behind you causing the adrenaline to push you to run faster.

You hadn’t stopped running until you were met with a semi busy street, the nightlife letting you blend in with the crowd. You had managed to get the notebook and yourself out of there in one piece. It’s how you got here, back to your home unaware of the golden eyes that had trailed you back to your street.

Looking down at the notebook, you carefully opened it and skimmed through it, famous names and politicians you recognized with dirty secrets scribbled onto the side of the names. “Wow,” You breathed out before an uneasy feeling settled into your stomach. There was a lot in this book, a lot of information anyone in the deeper side of things would love to have. Yet here you were, something that could change a lot in the public's eye of view, resting in the palms of your hands. What made it worse was you were told to hold onto it till someone named Dabi was going to pick it up from you. Standing up, you looked around your apartment scanning for a place to hide this. 

Deciding to put it into a cereal box for now, you went to go take a shower and call it for tonight. You were far too drained to do anything else but that.

The next few days you took it easy, leaving every now and then to get groceries or get a coffee at the nearby cafe, doing your best to keep an eye out on anything that would make you feel unsafe or alerted.

------------

“Come on Kami, you have to be sure,” Kirishima muttered as they stayed low in a stolen car, parked outside the apartments in which you lived. “I’m pretty sure that’s her, same hair, same face,” Kaminari eyed the building watching as you returned from the store again,”Clueless little thing huh? I don’t even recognize her from anywhere, she doesn’t even seem like the type to do anything like breaking into houses,” He spewed on watching as you swayed your hips up the stairs to your own little home,”She’s a cutie though,” 

“Yeah, but that cutie has something important. You’re right though, I haven’t seen her around, wonder how she knew about the notebook,” Kirishima mused before grabbing his gun, making sure it was loaded just in case before cocking it,”You sure we need that?” Kaminari asked to which Kirishima looked up at the apartments through the window.

“I hope not, but we don’t know her quirk or if she’s even alone up there,” the redhead responded with hesitation. He didn’t want to hurt her, just scare her enough to get what they want. “But you know what you’re gonna have to do. I’m just here for backup, this is your mistake bro,” kaminari only huffed back at his friend but nodded. Getting out of the car, the duo quickly made their way up the stairs and to the door they saw you vanish through. Reaching for the doorknob, Kaminari gave it a small tug and to his disappointment it was locked. Giving a look to Kirishima, the blonde gave a nod before knocking on the door.

Hearing you scuffle behind the door, his chest felt like it was going to explode when he heard the soft and sweet,”Hello?” come from inside. “We got a delivery for you!” He responded. Kirishima nudged his shoulder giving him a questioning, ‘What the fuck?’ look but when they both heard the door unlock, then quickly focused back to it.

Wasting no time, Kaminari rushed in grabbing you by the arm, his other hand flying to your mouth as he gave you a stern warning look as Kirishima followed inside, closing the door behind him with his foot. Drawing the gun just in case, Kirishima eyed the apartment before looking back at you and Kaminari.

The blonde knew you were in shock, your eyes wide as if you were a deer in headlights but tears quickly prickled at the corners of your eyes as he saw you eye the gun. “Hey, hey, shhh don’t cry it’s okay. Don’t scream or struggle, he won’t use it I promise,” Kaminari cooed, keeping a tight hold of you regardless. Little zaps sprung from his fingertips to show you that while he was talking sweet, he wasn’t going to let you try anything. Walking backwards towards your couch, he slowly removed his hand from your mouth,”Please...don’t hurt me,” You whispered out as you looked up at them. Kaminari would’ve felt more bad if it weren’t for the fact that you had stolen the notebook he was supposed to be keeping. He had to admit though, your wide eyes looking up at him like that made him feel something in his chest.

“Won’t have to if you give back that notebook you stole, baby, just tell us where it is and it’ll make this much easier,” He said sweetly to you and pushed you into the couch, having you fall back onto the cushions. Looking down at you as you pushed yourself further into the couch to try and keep some distance from him had him smirk with a bit of pride. He may be relaxed with his friends but man oh man if he didn’t look scary when he wanted to.

“I don’t know what youre talking about,” You tried to play off, to his disliking. He really didn’t want to have to hurt such a pretty woman like you but damn it if you didn’t spill it out he’d be forced to.

“Lying isn’t pretty you know,” Kaminari cooly muttered before lifting his hand up,”Search for it,” He said over his shoulder to which Kirishima started to go through your things. “I saw you taking it from my home, going through a man’s bedroom isn’t nice,” he continued in a teasing tone as he lowered himself so he was perched on his heels so he could look straight at you. Taking his hand he placed it on your leg causing you to tense up with worry. Watching you eye him back with uncertainty, he only smiled back in return as he let a few sparks against your leg.

“What the fuck!” he watched you hiss and try to pull away from his hand to which he only gripped the top of your leg tighter,”Ah uh,” Kaminari chuckled, a twisted tone in his voice, “Come on now, I don’t wanna have to hurt you more. Just give us the notebook,” He pressed on trying to get you to spill it already, “I’ll give you a minute to tell me, if not I might have to fry a few nerves, and we wouldn’t want that would we baby girl?” 

“Don’t call me that,” You spit back to his surprise. Fiesty one? Yeah he can dig that. “Don’t be so mean,” Kaminari uttered back in fake hurt as he shocked your leg with a little bit of a higher voltage watching as tears came to your eyes,”If you keep this up I’ll have no choice but to think you like this,” He teased and watched her as she gripped onto his own wrist trying to pry him off,”Let me go!” You cried out in frustration. Watching you struggle against his grip was cute but getting annoying, “Did you find it yet?” He shouted looking over his shoulder to try and find Kirishima who was currently digging around in your bedroom. 

“Not yet,” his friend called back. Kaminari was about to reply when he felt something hard smash against his head as well as you crying out in pain at the same time. Letting go of his grip on you, he fell back with a “Oof”. Holding the side of his head, he looked up to see you had headbutted him and were now on your way of getting up towards the door. “Fuck,” Kaminari gritted his teeth and sprung up, being quick to grab you by your wrist and letting out a painful wave of shocks getting you to scream. 

“Kaminari! The neighbors will hear!” He heard Kirishima yell at him causing him to grip onto her mouth, tugging her into the wall and pressing her stomach against the cool surface, “You know babe, I don’t usually get mad,” Kaminari whispered sweetly in your ear in a sickening tone, “But you’re really pushing it right now. Give it up or I’m going to show you how much I can really make you scream,” 

Feeling you tense up and shake against him had the blonde tilted your head back to see terror in your eyes. If this notebook hadn’t been so important, he would have probably apologized right then and there.

“Cereal box,”  He felt you mutter in his hand making him confused instantly. Removing his hand, Kaminari gave you a questioning look. “It’s...It’s in the coco puffs,” You sobbed out and he could tell you were trying to keep yourself calm through this. Looking over to Kirishima from across the room, he watched his friend hurry to the kitchen knowing they had limited time now that they made too much noise here. Digging through your cabinets, he watched his friend pull out a cereal box and spill the contents out, the notebook falling onto the counter, “There it is! Fuck there it is!” Kaminari laughed in relief while holding you between him and the wall,”See that wasn’t so hard? Who would’ve thought cereal was the answer?” He joked trying to lighten the mood.

“I don’t know dude, but we need to get out of here now, the neighbors probably heard her scream,” Kirishima responded but was smiling as well. It was funny seeing that you hid it almost so well in a breakfast box.

“Please...let me go, you have everything you want,” Kaminari looked down to see you with pleading eyes and while he wished he could say they were done with you, he couldn’t. “It’s not that easy baby, you stole...from the mafia no less. That was stupidly brave but our boss isn’t happy,” He explained and when he saw the look on your face of hesitation and fear he tightened his grip on your arm, “Don’t do anything stupid, just cooperate, it’s gonna be fine,” He tried to reassure you but already he could see the defiance building up, “I don’t want to have to knock you out, just relax,” 

“Here, blindfold her,” Kirishima reached over, handing over his headband knowing all too well how these things go. “No! I-” You began to try to fight back but Kaminari was quick to shock that out of you. “Kiri, hold her will you,” He muttered, taking the blindfold with one hand before gently pushing her to Kiri who grabbed both of her wrists and kept her sturdy. “Look just be good and we won’t have to hurt you any further,” Kirishima tried to reason with you looking down at your fearful expression before the black headband covered your red puffy eyes.

“One more thing, get her hands behind her back, I don’t trust her to behave in the car,” Kaminari requested and watched as you struggled a bit against his friend who pulled your hands behind your back. Taking off his own belt, he made a makeshift handcuffs and tightened them around your wrists,” Alright let's get going before we get caught, oh and baby, don’t scream when we get out there, I really don’t want to sedate you with my quirk,”

--------------------

After having the two strangers pull you out of the house quickly and get you to the car, you sat quietly in the back of the car, your heart and mind racing with thoughts and emotions. They had you blindfolded and your wrists tied up together making it difficult to calm down but at least they had the decency to buckle you up. “Hey, breathe, don’t hyperventilate,” You heard the blonde one suddenly say in the midst of the silence. That’s when you realized you really were breathing quick. “Fuck you…,” You mumble back and hear them both sigh a little as the car took off. “What’s your name then?” You heard the one named Kaminari speak again to which you only glared into your blindfold,”Gonna shock me if I don’t tell you?” You questioned back bitterly but hushed. 

“Just tryna make conversation, make you feel a little better,” You heard him respond with a huff before the radio was turned on. You felt somewhat relieved when the music replaced the awkward silence in the car. ‘You just had to get greedy with the money offered and this is where you ended up’ You furiously thought to yourself. Listening to your kidnappers talk with the music in the background had somewhat calmed you down just a bit to start feeling the aftermath of the shocks. Your leg and arm felt tingly still and a headache started to grow from the headbutt earlier. You’re sure to have a bump there later. 

Leaning against the seat of the car more, you shut your eyes and try to zone out to try and get a plan going. You hadn’t realized how much time went by before the car came to a slow and then a halt before hearing a gate screech open and for the car to move slowly forward, the tires sounding like they were on gravel as they stopped again. 

“I’ll get here,” You heard Kaminari say to which the other man snorted,”Not like I was gonna. Here take the notebook too. I said I would help, but I’m not going to face Deku. I already got my ass yelled at a few weeks ago and I’m not getting further into this,” He stated.

“Fineee,” was all you heard before the car doors clicked shut and footsteps to your side opened the car. Feeling hands reach in and unbuckle you, you kept silent in fear as well as anger before he picked you up out the car and helped you over his shoulder,”I can walk!” You hissed.

“Yeah, so can I,” Was the only snarky response you got back as you were carried off. As you reached the inside of wherever you were, you could hear small talk here and there as well as doors opening and closing. You started to feel a bit more nervous with how many people you could hear. Your kidnapper remained eerily silent as well as if he himself was nervous himself.

“Bring her in here,” You heard a different voice call out as Kaminari made a sharp turn into a different path following the voice. After a few more seconds you felt colder as you were put down and pushed into a chair. “Hey-” You started but a quick shock silenced you right up as your arms were tugged out from the belt and a cold metallic material was wrapped around your wrists.

“Now come with me,” The new voice spoke again and the footsteps traveled out the room, a door swinging shut with a loud click afterwards. Now you were chained to something, in a cold room, with a blindfold still on.

“Hello?” You called out and after no response you leaned over getting your face close to your hands before tugging off the blindfold. “What the fuck is this,” You muttered out as light brought onto you a cool grey room with nothing but a table to where your hands were chained, the cahir you were currently sitting on, and a chair in front of you. Starring around, the solid blocked out door was the only way out and god knows how many people were on the other side.

“Don’t cry...don’t you dare cry,” You growl to yourself trying to keep composure as you stare at your hands in anger. Breathing in and out as best as you could to keep from crying you wanted to think of a way out of this but there weren’t any ideas popping in. You were just a small time quirkless thief, not some mafia enemy. You didn’t know how to deal with this.

The door clicked back open causing you to turn your head quickly back to it to watch Kaminari walk back in with a folder,”(Y/N)...such a pretty name! You should have told me earlier baby,” He said making you stiffen up in your seat eyeing him with a glare,” But you really should have said something about being quirkless, I would have gone easy on you,” He pouted over to you making you bare your teeth in disgust.

“Why? Being quirkless doesn’t make us weak,” You spit out in malice disgusted by his suggestion,”I stole that notebook from you without one,” You proudly stated in a matter of fact tone. “Mhm, yeah but look where that got you girly,” Kaminari shot back taking a seat across from you before looking through whatever file he had on you. Golden eyes locked back to yours and a chill went down your spine from the grin he had,”So missy, I see you actually have a fair share of robberies in your file. Well, this time you hit big money huh? Wanna share where you got that information on the little notebook?” He started. 

Taking a small breathe, you knew you couldn’t give that away. Deep down you knew that wasn’t the best idea even if you were in this situation. If Shigaraki’s crew figured it out you told on them, you were most definitely dead. “Bite me,” You answered glaring back down at your hands not wanting to see what expression the man had.

“Maybe later, but right now I kind of need answers baby girl. See, the boss needs answers and he always gets what he needs,” Kaminari laughed lightly but you could tell he wasn’t too happy with your answer, “So lets try this again. Where did you get the information? Don’t make me shock a quirkless girly like you,” 

“I’m not making you do anything, you’re just fucked up enough to be the villain of the situation here,” That line alone made the room feel even colder as you lifted your head to see Kaminari silently put the folder down. He was still smiling and you couldn’t help but want to scoot further away from him. The chair beneath him squeaked against the floor as he got up and made his way behind you. “I told you I’m really slow to anger right?” He muttered lowly without the smile leaving his face and you felt instant regret as he reached over, his chin over your shoulder as his arms trailed up your arm and made their way to your hands. Flipping them over he forced his hands into yours, holding onto them tightly.

“Fuck off,” You huffed trying to shake him off but before you could try to shake him off, a high voltage sparked through both of your hands and through your arms reaching the rest of your body. Screams ripped through your lungs and your back arched off the chair as the tears had flowed down your cheeks. He didn’t let up until he was sure you had learned the message, letting the shocks die down but didn’t move his hands. You went limp against the chair breathing heavily as sobs shook through you.

“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m only hurting you as much as you hurt me with your mean little opinions,” He whispered but something in his voice gave off a small hint of him liking this, “Now, who told you about the notebook?” he asked again his breath close to your ear, “And think hard about what you wanna say. If you wanna act tough, I’ll treat you like you’re tough. You can handle more can’t you babygirl? I’ll make it last longer next time,” He laughed into your ear before he licked the shell causing another shiver to go down your spine.

“You’re...an asshole,” You cried out trying to hold onto the thin string of bravery and confidence to get through this. You heard a dark chuckle from behind you before your mind went blank. A searing pain of shocks went throughout your whole body as your scream filled the room once more, trying to tug your hands away from him but to no luck he remained the stronger of you two. It felt like this would never end and that this pain was going to be with you forever. After what felt like hours, the shocks stopped as your mind went numb. Your eyes closed as they felt heavier and your body felt like it was being pricked over and over again with needles.

“Don’t pass out on me now, come on wake up!” You barely even heard his voice as the blonde squeezed your hands before he helped you sit back up against the chair,”man, I went a little overboard huh?” Chuckled filled the room as he gave light taps to your cheeks causing your eyes to open to look above you, golden honey pools hypnotizing you for a little. “Hey pretty baby, you back from your little high?” He joked before tears pooled down your cheeks again, afraid of what more he could do to you. “Just tell me okay? We don’t wanna be doing this all day and night do we?” He questioned with a smile as he took your hands again making your resolve snap.

“H-He..he told me he would pay me alot...I just wanted to pay bills,” You cried out breaking under the pressure and pain, wanting nothing more than to quit being a thief and just go home to curl up in bed, “Shhh, it’s okay. I get it, you just wanted to survive out in this cold world. Give me a name, I’ll make this all better,” he breathed out, his thumb on your right hand stroking the back of your hand trying to soothe you.

“His n-name is Mr. Compress. I really don’t know his name please...don’t shock me please, that’s all i know! He wanted the notebook and gave me your address that’s all! Please let me go,” You begged wanting nothing more than for this to be over.

“Good girl, there you go. It’s okay, that’s all I wanted,” Kaminari praised before letting go of your hands which you automatically tried to pull back to yourself, your palms red and starting to swell. “I’ll get you some water okay?” He hummed as he gave you a condescending pat to the head before leaving the room. You didn’t care for what he did, you felt so drained and your head just felt so heavy. Closing your eyes you finally gave out and slumped over the table, your breathing uneven.

--------------------------

You felt like you were on a cloud surrounded by angels who covered you in their feathers. It felt like you could sink into that pleasurable feeling forever if it weren’t for the pain coursing through your hands. You didn’t want to move, you didn’t want to open your eyes. You didn’t want to be shocked-

You started to remember the moments before you had passed out and panic flung through your chest. You had to get up, assess what’s going on. Managing to open your eyes, you were met with a dimly lit room and soft fleece blankets all around and over you. Carefully sitting up you hissed in pain when your hands ached. Bringing them in front of you, white bandages were wrapped around your palms and fingers. Confusion hit you all at once as you looked up, the only light source coming into the room being from the ajar door. Squinting to try and see better throughout the room, dread filled you as you recognized your surroundings. This is where it all started. The room you took the notebook in.

Being quick to stand up, you felt woozy but the need to leave was greater than the need to sit down. Stumbling to the door, you swung it out and peeked out to see Kaminari sitting lazily on his couch, a ps4 controller in hand as he button mashed away. It was odd not seeing him in a suit, rather in shorts and a simple hoodie. Carefully stepping out, you looked to the front door trying to convince yourself to make a bolt for it. Taking in a small sturdy breath, you launched yourself out the room to try and get to the door but it seemed like your body had other plans. Wobbling forward you managed a few steps before your head pounded causing you to fall to your knees and groan.

“Careful! You’re probably still a little fried,” A voice came from above you and helped stand you up. The same golden eyes that had you crying and being shocked were now looking at you with worry. Dumbfounded by his expression, you let him lead you to his couch and sit you down,”You might want to take it easy for a while, you put up quite a fight in that room,” Kaminari chuckled to which you could only blink at him with confusion as to what was going on with the sudden flip of being nice.

“I want to go home,” Was what you finally managed to say after the two of you had stared at each other in silence. “Yeah...that’s not gonna happen baby girl. It’s a bit more complicated than that,” He responded with a small smile that had a sign of pity in it.

“What do you mean? I really just want to forget everything and go home, please,” You tried to argue to which he shrugged and sunk into the back of the couch getting comfortable again. Not bothering to look at you, he stared at the t.v ahead of him, “Well, there were three options on what to do with you. One, we could have killed you which I really didn’t want to do. Two, we could have released you but that would have left us open for an attack. Shigaraki’s side could have kidnapped you right after and tortured you again and killed you after for information about the book and us. Then this option. I could take you home with me, keep you safe and away from your own crimes and as well as us safe from others taking you for information. I took a liking to you, it would have felt a shame to kill a pretty babe like you,” He explained fully, before looking back at you. You felt horrified, looking back down at your hands to come up with something to say but you didn’t. You drew a blank. All you could think was that if you did leave, you’d have two mafia groups looking for your death/capturement but if you stayed, you would be forever locked away with this man who you know nothing of beside the fact that he works for the mafia.

“Hey, I know that’s a lot to take in, but I’m doing you a favor, keeping you here to stay alive. All you gotta do is listen to me, and we’ll both be happy. You can also call me Denki from now on, ‘Kay?” Kaminari hummed as he got up walking to his room and coming back with the soft blanket you were snuggled into earlier. Dropping it onto your head, he plopped down next to you.

“Denki?” You whispered out his name as you hugged the soft blanket around you for the comfort, “What...what am I supposed to do here?” You asked fearful of the answer looking at him as his eyes had a brighter shine than before.

“Just be a good girly and we will see what you can do,” He answered back and looked back to his game starting it back up, “You’ll make a cute little housewife or something. We’ll figure it out,”

|| Dear No One || Ch. 2

Summary: Bay St.James was perfectly happy crushing on guys from afar and writing love letters that she never dreamed she’d send. So what happens when the letters she prayed no one ever saw, suddenly got sent out to their intended recipients? Especially when one of those happens to be Bay’s sister’s boyfriend!

Pairing:  Hoseok x OC, Namjoon x OC, Jin x OC

Genre: Fluff, Romance, To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before!au, High School!au, Fake Dating!au, Friends To Lovers!au

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: none

Author’s Note: Chapter 2! I apologize for how long it’s taken me to get this up, but coursework has been eating my butt and it was also my birthday so Idk *shrugs* but I hope you all enjoy!!

Seokjin Kim is Ivy’s boyfriend, but to the rest of our family, he’s just Jin, the ridiculously good cook with an even more ridiculous windowscreen wiper laugh.  It’s hard to say who loves him the most, because every member of my family is a little bit in love with him, all in our own different ways. Before he was dating Ivy, he was just my friend Jin. He was just always there, I mean, not always because he moved into the house next door to ours about four years ago, but you get it. We did everything together; movies, diner dinners, even the odd basketball game at school. 

My dad loves Jin to death. Mainly because he’s a boy and my dad is surrounded by girls every day, my mom and three daughters; Ivy, the eldest, me, and then Poppy, the youngest St. James girl. He also likes Jin because Jin likes soccer and golf and will always go fishing with him. My dad tried to take us girls fishing once. It did not end well. 

Poppy loves Jin because he’ll drive her to derby practice and stop by her favorite ice cream place along the way. She also makes him watch TV with her and he never gets bored of it, or at least I think he doesn’t. Poppy will also whine at Jin until he gets her food. He fights it for a little while every time, saying that he doesn’t have money so it’s too bad. But he caves eventually and runs to the store for her. 

My mom loves Jin because he’s always doing the jobs my dad forgets to do. Mowing the lawn, moving heavy boxes from the garage to the basement, stuff like that. 

As for Ivy, I think she loves him because we all do.

Ivy, Poppy, Jin and myself are in our living room, as we usually are on a Tuesday night. Poppy is pressing flowers between the pages of her history book, leaving pink and purple stains over the snooze-worthy paragraphs. She’s surrounded by discarded petals and leaves on the floor, a mess sure to give my mom a heart attack. 

“You know daisies are just weeds, right?” Jin laughs, his eyes creasing at the corners, and turning into half-moon shapes as Poppy turns to face him. 

“Your arms are weeds, Seokjin.” She fires back, her lip turning up slightly into a smirk. 

Ivy and Jin are on the couch, spread amongst the soft and fluffy cushions, and I am sat on the floor, carefully avoiding daisy petals and peony stains. My back is against Ivy’s feet, my favorite mug in my hands filled with cocoa. We’re watching TV, Ivy insisted on something at least slightly educational. In the middle of an advert break a commercial comes on, it’s advertising some kind of car, winding its way through the busy streets of London. I gasp as I take a mouthful of cocoa, an idea forming quickly in my mind as I choked on the drink in my hand.

“Ivy! We should go to London for my spring break!” I can already imagine it, Ivy and I walking around the city, shopping on Oxford Street and standing at the top of The Shard, taking in the views.

Ivy’s eyes widen in excitement at the prospect. “Do you think Mom and Dad will let you?”

I nod furiously in response. “Of course. It’s a whole culture! They’ll have to let me. Besides, I’ll be with you, Ivy.” But I don’t sound so sure by the end of my sentence. I’ve never flown by myself before, or even been out of the country. Would Ivy meet me at the airport? Or would I have to find my way to a hotel? 

Jin must see the panic begin to set in my eyes because he suddenly says, “Don’t worry, your parents will definitely let you go if I’m with you.”

The worry begins to fade. “Yeah! We can stay at hostels and eat fish and chips for every meal!”

“We can go to Abbey Road!” Jin sits up, a bright smile on his face.

“We can go to a murder mystery lunch on an Orient Express!” I feel giddy with excitement until Jin’s window screen laugh makes an appearance. 

“I’m pretty damn sure a murder mystery lunch would be the cost of our entire trip budget.” He moves his arm around Ivy. “Your sister lives in fantasy land.”

“She is the most imaginative of the three of us.” Ivy laughs. 

“What about me?” Poppy interrupts, staring at us with her infamous puppy dog eyes. 

“You?” I nudge Poppy under the coffee table. “ You’re the least fanciest St. James girl. I have to beg you to brush your hair in the morning, let alone wash it three times a week.” 

Poppy huffs several times as her cheeks turn bright red. “I wasn’t talking about that, you blobfish. I was talking about London!

“I shake my head quickly, dismissing her idea. “You’re too little to stay at a hotel without Mom or Dad.”

She scrambles over to Ivy and into her lap, even though she’s fourteen years old and fourteen is definitely too big to be climbing into your sister’s lap, especially when you have legs as long as Poppy’s. “Ivy-y-y, I can come to London, can’t I?”

“Maybe we should make it into a family vacation?” Ivy muses, pulling Poppy closer and hugging her tightly. “You and Bay and Mom and Dad could all come to London.”

My face quickly scrunches into a frown. That’s not the London vacation I was already planning in my mind, the name for my Pinterest board all ready and waiting. Jin notices, and over the top of Poppy’s head, he mouths to me ‘we’ll text later’, and I give him a quick ‘ok’ hand motion before Poppy can see.

||

Later that night, Jin has already long gone home. Poppy and mom and dad are asleep, and Ivy and I are sat at the kitchen table. She’s on her computer and I’m next to her rolling cookie dough filled with sprinkles into balls and putting them onto a baking sheet. Funfetti cookies to make Poppy happy with me again. When I had gone in to say good night to her, she had turned away from me so quickly that I was sure I got whiplash. She’s still convinced I’m going to go to London without her. When the cookies are baked I’m going to put them on a plate and next to her on her bedside table sop that she’ll wake up to the smell of fresh-baked sugary goodness. 

Ivy’s being creepily quiet, until out of nowhere she looks up from her computer and sighs, “I broke up with Jin tonight. After he left when I walked him out.”

The cookie dough I’m rolling falls out of my hands almost as quickly as my jaw falls to the floor. I’m a gasping mess and can’t get any words out, so Ivy continues.

“I guess, I figured it was time, you know?” She muses. Her eyes aren’t red, watery or puffy, so she hasn’t cried. I don’t think, anyway. Anyone would think she’d just thrown out a broken pair of shoes. Because Ivy always looks fine, even when she’s far from it. 

I’m finally able to stop flapping my mouth about like a fish and speak. “I don’t even see why you had to break up with him at all, Ivy! Just because you’re off to college, doesn’t mean that that’s the end of things.”

“Bay, I’m going to Cambridge, not community college. Trinity College is almost five and a half thousand miles away.” She pushes her hair out of her face and her glasses up her nose. “It wouldn’t be worth it.”

I pull a face of surprise. I can’t believe she’d say something like that about Jin. “It would be worth it because it’s Jin! Jin who has loved you more than anyone has ever loved someone!”

Ivy rolls her eyes at me. She insists I'm being dramatic, but I know I’m not. It’s the truth, that’s how much Jin loves Ivy. To the ends of the earth and back. He would never even so much as glance at another girl. 

Suddenly she speaks again. “Do you know what Mom told me before I started my senior year?”

“What?” I ask curiously. For a moment, Jin is forgotten. Ivy and Mom have a relationship that I could only ever dream of. Mom tells her everything, every story, every memory, every tiny piece of wisdom she has ever learned, and Ivy could dangle that in front of my like a piece of cheese for a mouse and I’d give her my undivided attention, hook line, and sinker. We could be arguing, or I’m about to get hit by a truck, and Ivy could mention something Mom told her once, and I’d drop everything to listen. Sure, Mom loves me, but she and Ivy have a connection that goes deeper, probably because Ivy’s firstborn. 

“She told me to never go to college with a boyfriend. She told me that I should never be the girl crying on the phone to her boyfriend and saying no to all the adventures and opportunities instead of yes.”

Cambridge is Ivy’s yes, I suppose. I pick up a lump of cookie dough and throw it in my mouth absent-mindedly. 

“Don’t eat raw cookie dough, Bay, it’s bad for you.” she scolds. 

I glance at her sideways, ignoring her comment. “Jin would never hold you back from doing the things that you wanted to do. He’s not like that and you know it.”

Ivy’s mouth turns down at the corners at this, and I move around the table to wrap my arms around her shoulders. She leans back to look at me and smiles her toothy Ivy smile. “I’m ok.” she insists, but I know she isn’t.

“It’s never too late you know!” You can go round to his house right now and tell him you changed your mind!”

Ivy shakes her head and shakes herself out of my grasp. “It’s done, Bay.” I sulk back around to my side of the table. “When will the first batch of cookies be done already? I’m so hungry.” 

 I look at the penguin timer at the end of the table, away from the mess of flour and sprinkles. “Only a few minutes more.” I go back to rolling more balls of dough. “Anyways, I’m not listening to you Ivy, you and Jin aren’t over. You love him far too much.”

Ivy shakes her head at me in exasperation, locks of her brown hair falling from the messy bun on top of her head. “Bay...” She sighs at me, in her impatient Ivy voice, like she is my mother and I've been caught eating sweets before dinner. 

“Wait and see!” I quickly interrupt, wafting a ball of dough under her nose. “You and Jin will be back together in no time. Trust me on that.” But even as the words are coming out from my mouth, something in my stomach is telling me it’s not true, and it isn't the raw cookie dough. Ivy isn’t the kind of girl to make a quick decision without thinking it through. She won’t break up with someone and then get back together again. Once she’s decided on something, it’s done. There’s no changing her mind.

I wish as I have time and time again, that I was so much more like Ivy. Sometimes it just feels as if I’ll never be done, that I can never let go.

Later, after I’ve cleaned up all the mess from the cookie baking session, plates, bowls, and trays, and set a plate on Poppy’s bedside table, I go to my own room. I don’t turn on the light, but I carefully tread my way over to my large window. Jin’s light is still on.

Half Blood, Whole Heart: Part 5

Pairings: Jax x Reader, sister Winchester!reader- SOA/SPN Crossover

Warnings: Swearing, fluff. lots of angst, character injury….. John being the typical father of a daughter... IDK... if you’re offended, sorry not really

Word Count: 4,390

A/N: So I decided to repost my novel- the story that someone stole from my old blog and put up on Wattpad. PLEASE don’t be an asshole and steal my stories. It CRUSHED me when it happened and almost ran me off Tumblr.

Half Blood, Whole Heart Masterlist     Aesthetic by @ravenangel33​

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Maybe he’s giving us the rest of the week off to go to the cabin early.” Jax suggested as he carried you on his back across the parking lot toward the garage. The two of you had been guessing all morning on what Clay had in store for you.

“Yea right. I still vote pay raise.” Jax shook his head as he set you down in front of the office door.

“Time to find out.” He rapped his knuckles on the door twice before swinging it open. You made it two steps into the door before you froze. Frozen on the CCTV monitor was you, Jax, Sam and Dean standing around the open trunk of the Impala with every gun Dean owned on display.

“Didn’t think I’d find out about it?” Clay asked. You couldn’t take your eyes off the heartbroken look on Sam’s face as you took a half step back.

“Clay, this is my fault. I told them…” Jax started and you shook your head and took ahold of his arm and looked at Clay.

“No, this is on me. Sam’s house burned down this weekend and Jess was inside when it happened. That’s where I was this weekend; trying to help out where I could…”

“Jess was inside?!” Gemma gasped. You nodded as a couple tears slipped from your eyes. “Oh honey.” She said as she jumped up from her chair to wrap you in her arms. “Do they know who did it?”

“They have an idea. (Y/N)’s brothers were on their way to Colorado to follow a lead. I told them since Sam had lost everything he had in the fire they could stay for a few hours to rest since they are now family.” Gemma kissed the top of your head and pulled back to look at you.

“I am so sorry, honey.”

“As am I. Jess was a good girl; but that is not why I’ve called the two of you in here.” Clay said. Gemma sat back down in her chair as he pointed to the Impala’s trunk. “The false bottom; who did that?” He inquired as he looked over at you. Your brow furrowed as you wiped your tears away and sniffed.

“Umm… an old family friend designed it for my dad, originally but Dean went back when he got the car and reenforced it.” Clay nodded as he pointed at the chair across the desk. You quickly sat down on Jax’s knee as Gemma handed you a cigarette.

“Becoming the old lady of the VP of the club comes with its perks. You are now privy to a little more detail of what goes on behind closed doors at church. And this…” he said as he gestured to the car “could not have come at a better time for us. We have a shipment of guns coming in Sunday morning. I need something like this to get them to the warehouse.” You nodded slowly as you looked up at the TV screen.

“Do you have cars already that I can use? And what kinda weight are you talkin’?” You asked as you offered Jax your smoke.

“No to the cars and this shipment is little over four dozen unassembled .223 cal Bushmaster AR-15’s.” You whistled in shock at the idea and nodded your head.

“You need two cars for that kinda weight. Put all that in one and you’re driving dead. You need them done by Saturday at the latest.” You said, thinking out loud and Clay nodded. You shrugged. “Well, since you don’t have cars already, that same old family friend who made that box owns a scrap yard and auto shop in South Dakota. Cash only and it’s far enough away that they couldn't be traced between you and him. He’d help me out; guy is like a second father to me.”

“Take Juice with you with the flat bed and get on the road.” Jax nodded and pat your thigh and you hopped up. After quick goodbyes to Gemma, the two of you left the office and headed for the dorms.

“So much for the cabin this weekend.” Jax said. You blanched and looked over at him.

“Cabin…? Baby, what the hell just happened?” You asked with a laugh. He smirked and looked at you as he held the club door open for you.

“Perks of being my old lady.” You heard someone give a weak, half drunken cheer and you laughed as you headed for your room.

“Yea, well if my dad finds out about this he’s gunna kill me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well I’ll be damned. If it isn’t my sweet little, (Y/N).” Bobby said as you stood on his porch late the next afternoon. You tilted your head and smiled at him as you shoved your hands in your back pockets; suddenly grateful that it was cold enough in South Dakota in October to be able to wear a hoodie to cover your ink.

“Hey, Bobby… sorry for just showing up. I would have called but I couldn’t get ahold of Dean to get your new numbers.”

“You never have to call to come here. Fact, I wish you and your idjit brothers would come around more often.” He held open the screen door for you and you smiled as you and Jax headed inside. “So to what do I owe the visit?” He asked as you headed into the living room. You sighed contently as you looked around the very familiar house.

“New job. I got out little over a year ago and got a job at a shop in Charming, California. Fell in love with this fool here.” You said as you gestured to Jax. “Bobby, I’d like you to meet Jax Teller. Babe, this is Bobby Singer; the man who taught my dad how to hunt, our occasional babysitter growin’ up, and my other dad.” The two men shook hands before the three of you sat down. You bit back a smile as Bobby’s eyes darted over the patches on the front of Jax’s kutte. After a moment, he looked back over at you.

“I heard from John you just up and ran away.” Bobby said as his brow furrowed. You leaned forward and shook your head.

“Bobby, you knew as well as I did I wasn’t cut out for this shit. I am nothing like dad and the boys. I had an out and I took it. Did I go about it poorly? Yea, maybe but I did what I needed to and it turned out to be one of the best decisions I could have made for myself.” The older man nodded slowly as he pursed his lips.

“He hasn’t talked to you since, has he?” You shook your head.

“Dean didn’t until Friday either. Dad won’t talk to me or Sammy anymore and now we can’t find him. Dean and him hunted together for a while but he took a woman in white case in Jericho a few weeks back that the three of us had to finish and he’s been gone ever since. His phone is shut off and everything.”

“He’s chasin’ the thing that got Mary…”

“The one that got Sam’s girlfriend same way.” You said over him and Bobby blanched.

“Balls. How’s Sam?” You shook your head slowly as Jax put his hand on your lower back.

“Not good. He’s on a war path; dropped out and blew off an interview for law school. I haven’t heard from him yet today but I know dad sent them to Colorado for a case.” You watched Bobby’s eyes dart almost questioningly toward Jax and you put a hand on his knee. “He knows. He got the whole life story the other night. I trust him.”

“My guess is it’s a wendigo.” He said as he got up and headed into the kitchen. Your brow furrowed.

“A wendigo this far west?” He nodded as he brought back three beers. “That’s unheard of.” Bobby shrugged as he flopped back down in his chair, sending little wisps of dust into the air.

“Yea, well it’s my guess.” You took a sip of your beer and looked down at the bottle with a small shake of your head.

“Have you heard from my dad?” Bobby stayed quiet for a moment and you looked up at him.

“He’s safe. I… uhh… I talked to the idjit couple days ago.” You sighed and shook your head as hurt and anger coursed through your veins.

“So he can call you but he can’t be bothered to call his kids. Typical John fucking Winchester right there.”

“Awe, c’mon, (Y/N). You know it’s not like that.” You huffed and leaned back against the couch.

“Unfortunately Bobby, it is like that. It’s been like that my whole life and you know it. Mary’s killer then his kids.” You took a swig of your beer as Bobby shook his head but before he could say anything else, you sat back up and got to business. “Look, it doesn’t matter. He wrote me off last year. I ain’t losing any sleep at night over it anymore, but talking about my dad’s poor parenting choices isn’t why we came up here. I actually need your help with some cars.” Bobby laughed and gestured toward the window behind you.

“Car’s I got. What do you need ‘em for?” You bobbed your head to the side.

“Better you don’t ask questions.” You watched him take a deep breath and you once again cut him off before he could say anything. “I need two, drivable cars and I need to get false bottoms in them and get them back to Charming by Saturday. Figured we could use the plans you had for the Impala, use what we can from the lot here and we’ll pay cash for anything we take.”

“Girl, what are you getting yourself into?” You gave him a weak smile and shook your head.

“Nothing I can’t handle. I’m just a mechanic that works in a shop with an odd request from her boss.” Bobby looked at you and you could see a slight look of sadness and disappointment in his eyes before he turned to Jax.

“You get this girl in trouble and you answer to me, boy; we clear?”

“Yes sir, but you don’t need to worry. She’ll always be protected.” Bobby glared at him for a moment before shaking his head and turning back to you.

“Alright, take what you need. You know your way around the yard.” You smiled and stood up to give him a hug.

“Thanks Bobby. You’re the best.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Juice, hand me that torch.” You said as you tossed the last section of fabric out of the trunk of the Ford Aspire you were working on the next afternoon.

“What, you gunna catch this place on fire?” He teased as he handed it over to you. You glanced up at him as you pulled off the flannel you were wearing and tossed it at your friend as you sparked the torch up.

“I’m gunna torch you if you don’t get your ass to work helpin’.” He laughed as you started cutting slots in the bottom to add support beams for the weight of the guns.

“I am helping. I’m making sure you and Jax stay on target.”

“You better listen to my old lady and get to work.” Jax called out from under a Dodge Spirit he had found. Juice let out a little cheer and you smiled as you cut the torch off. You grabbed the rubber mallet and knocked out the pieces you cut and grabbed your first support beam.

“Still like the sound of that.” You called out as you laid the beam across the floor of the trunk.

“Did I not raise you better than that?” The sound of your dad’s voice made your blood run colder then the cool air that was blowing through the open doors. You stood up straight and walked around the back of the car to see your dad standing at the opening of the garage.

“Dad? What are you…?”

“No, better question is what are you doing?” He demanded. “I get a call from Bobby yesterday saying my little girl shows up on the back of a motorcycle with some punk asking about cars with false bottoms.”

“Dad stop.” You said as you headed toward him. You saw Jax sliding out from under the car he was tuning up and you started to pray that there wouldn’t be a fight. John shook his head.

“No, you stop. I gave you a good life and you throw it away for some guy you don’t even know.”

“She has a good life now with me and my family.” Jax jumped in and you side stepped between him and your dad.

“Stay out of this boy. This is between me and my daughter.”

“A daughter you stopped talking to a over year ago because she made the choice not to bounce from motel to motel with you to fight a fight that wasn’t hers anymore.”

“Jax, stop. I got this.” You tried as you put your hand on his chest. He shook his head as he gently grabbed your wrist.

“Who the hell do you think you are?”

“Dad, will you please, just stop for a second.” You begged but John simply ignored you.

“I’m the man who has been taking care of her for the last year when you refused to talk to her because she didn’t agree with your lifestyle.”

“Oh, because hunting is so much worse than being in a fucking biker gang!”

“Juice, get him out of here!” You shouted over the men. Juice came running and shoved Jax toward the lot as you tried to push your father away from the man you loved.

“What the hell are you thinking, (Y/N)?” John shouted as his eyes followed the two men into the yard. “How could you think that that is a better life choice for you?”

“How could I not?!” You screamed back as you took a step back. “Dad, I spent my whole life traveling across the US, living in fucking motels, bouncing from school to school with almost no parental supervision or friends for that mater. I mean for Christ’s sake Dean raised me; not you! Then when I started hunting with you, I got arrested at least once a month, I committed felonies every single day and I broke more laws then I care to even think about. With Jax? I have a steady job as a mechanic that pays really good money, I don’t get arrested, I don’t break the law, I have the same roof over my head every night… tell me how being with him is so much worse.” He stayed quiet for only a moment as his eyes fell from yours… and straight onto Jax’s name tattoo across your heart. You watched his rage flare in his eyes as he glared at you.

“You let him BRAND YOU!” He roared. You didn’t even have time to stop him as he stormed around you toward Jax. You spun around as John stalked up to him.

Your stomach turned as your dad got a halfway decent punch in. As Jax pulled back to swing, you finally reacted. You ran into the garage to where Jax had tossed his kutte and pulled the gun he always carried out of the pocket. You sprinted out into the yard, pointed the gun away from the house and the men and fired.

“ENOUGH!” You screamed as you stormed toward the men who had found themselves on the ground in a mess of blood and limbs. You aimed the gun at both of them and scowled. “Jackson, walk it off.” Your boyfriend shoved away from your dad and headed into the garage with Juice on his heels. You kept the gun pointed at your dad and you shook your head at him.

“How can you sit there and ask me if you raised me better than being called someones old lady when you have been avoiding your kids for years and you just beat the shit out of my boyfriend because I choose to get a tattoo? I’m 23 now, dad. You don’t get to make my choices for me anymore and I choose the life I’ve made for myself.” You lowered the gun and headed back into the garage. “We need to get these cars done, guys. No more fucking around.” You put the gun down on the tool box next to the Aspire and forced yourself to go back to work. After a moment, Jax came over and pulled you out of the trunk and into his arms.

“Babe, I’m sorry.” He said and you shook your head and sighed.

“You shouldn’t have let him get to you. That’s not your fight, baby.”

“Yea but I don’t want him talking to you like that.” You looked up at him and gave him a small shrug.

“He’s my dad.”

“Still doesn’t give him the right to talk to you like that.” You gave him a chaste kiss and smiled.

“That’s John Winchester. I can tell you right now, he’s not done. I bet he’s up at the house, stomping around and licking his wounds. Bobby will calm him down the way Dean was always able to and just like he used to, he will see the logic he can’t see when he is mad. I learned that about him when he used to fight with Sam.” You reached up and gently brushed your thumb across a bruise that was just starting to appear on his jaw and you shook your head. “I can’t believe you punched my dad and my brother the first time you met both of them.” He smiled and shrugged.

“Yea well in my defense, your dad swung first.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So what do we have left to do to get these on the road tomorrow morning?” Jax asked softly as the two of you sat on Bobby’s porch late that night. You exhaled your cigarette smoke and glanced over your shoulder at the front door.

“All I gotta do inside is put on the top of the box in the Spirit and reinstall the lining in both trunks; two hours max. Can you to check the breaks on the Aspire for me though? I didn’t like the way it was breaking with all the tools in the back.”

“What was it doing?” He asked as you took a drag of your cigarette.

“Takin’ it’s sweet ass time. Felt like I was trying to break through sand so I’m missing something somewhere and could use a fresh pair of eyes.” He nodded as the screen door squeaked open. You both turned around to look at John who had been avoiding both of you for the past 24 hours.

“You’re smoking again?” He asked harshly as he took a seat in an old chair by the front door. You scooted over to lean back against the banister and nodded. He gestured to Jax. “He know?”

“Yes sir.” He sighed and ran his hand over his face, leaned forward and shook his head.

“(Y/N), I know you think I treat you differently than your brothers but I need you to know that’s not the case. It’s just… you’re my little girl. I never wanted this life for any of you kids, especially you but I didn’t have another choice. I had to go after…”

“I know daddy.” You interrupted.

“No, honey, you don’t. It’s not a spirit.” You sat up a little straighter and turned toward him.

“You know what killed Mary and Jess?” He nodded slowly.

“You cannot tell your brothers you know this yet; you understand me?” You nodded. “It’s a demon… and it wants Sam.”

“What?! Why does it want Sam?” John shook his head and shrugged.

“Haven’t got a clue but I’m closing in on it quickly. I know how to kill it and it knows it.” He looked over at Jax for a moment before he looked back at you. “You listen to me… if you are choosing to be out, you stay out of this. This is one nasty son of a bitch. I fought for years to keep you out of this life as best I could by leaving you behind. Figured it was the only way to keep you safe, so if being with… this guy…”

“Jax.” You watched him inhale slightly to fight off any anger and he gave you a half nod.

“If being with Jax is what you want to do, you don’t get involved with hunts. Period. If we need you; I will call you and only as a last resort. Otherwise, you stay hidden.” You nodded and took a drag of your cigarette as John stood up. “I do love you, (Y/N) and I did the best I could with you and your brothers.” He leaned down and kissed the top of your head before walking past you down the steps to his truck. You spun around on the porch as he opened the truck door.

“Hey dad?” He paused and looked over at you. “Call the boys. They are really worried about you.” He nodded and pointed at Jax.

“You take care of my little girl, son.” Jax nodded as John got into his truck.

“Love you.” You called out as he was about to close the door. You could see his smile by the lights in the cab and he bobbed his head in agreement.

“I love you too, sweetheart.” You leaned against Jax’s shoulder as John started his truck. As he pulled out of the driveway, you waved goodbye and sent a little thanks to who ever allowed you to have a little closure on the family business chapter of your life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Cars look good, (Y/N)” Clay says as you gave him a quick tour of the storage boxes that lined the trunk and under the back seats of the two cars. You beamed as you shoved the back seat of the Spirit back in place.

“Thanks. Jax and Juice were both a lot of help.” He nodded as you closed the back door and he turned around to talk to Tig and Chibs about the run. You looked at your boyfriend and shrugged. “Guess that was my thanks?” You asked softly and he chuckled and nodded.

“Best you’re gunna get.” The guys started heading to their bikes and you sighed.

“Be safe, come home to me.”

“Always darlin’.” He said as he cupped your cheeks and gave you a kiss. “Enjoy catching up on sleep without me.”

“Yea right. I sleep like shit when your gone.” He gave you a chaste kiss before forcing himself away from you. “Love you!” You called out. He spun around and smiled at you as he cupped his hands around his mouth.

“I love my old lady!” He shouted over the buzz of the engines and your laugh was lost in a handful of cheers. He blew you a kiss as he got on his bike and you waved as the group pulled out of the compound. You headed inside to your room with the full intention of cleaning up and starting some laundry for the week but the comfort of your bed was too much and you did take a nap.

——

A sharp knocking on your door woke you up and you rolled over with a groan.

“Yea?” You called out groggily. You blinked a few times to let your eyes adjust to the light as Gemma came into the room. “Hey mom, what’s…” as your vision finally focused, you could see tears falling down her cheeks. You sat up quickly and shook your head.

“Honey, it’s Jax…” You jumped out of bed and grabbed your boots.

“Where is he?” You demanded as you fought to function through your panic.

“St. Thomas.” You jumped up and grabbed your phone, keys and helmet and walked past her.

“I’ll meet you there.” You could hear her crying as you raced out of the club. Every step you took felt like you were running through quicksand. You shook your head; forcing yourself not to cry as you began a repetitive chant of ‘he’s fine’ in your head.

You sped out of the compound and down the cracked pavement; pushing your bike to the limit and breaking traffic laws left and right. The short trip felt like it took hours until you were finally pulling into the hospital parking lot and parking next to the motorcycles. As you were pulling off your helmet, you heard someone shout your name.

“What the fuck happened?” You shouted as you stormed over to Chibs, who was out front smoking. He shook his head.

“Mayan ambush on the caravan. We split the party ta keep ‘em off the cars. ‘e took a couple ‘its. It…” He trailed off and you shook your head.

“Where was he hit?”

“‘e took two ta the left side in ‘is vest an’ one ta the left leg… but it clipped ‘is femoral artery.” Your breath caught in your lungs and you took a step back as your whole world seemed to cave in on you. You grabbed your friend’s arm as your knees gave out.

“No… no, no, no…” You said as you sank down to the ground. Tears started pouring down your cheeks as you tucked your knees up to your chest.

“‘e’s in surgery now. Did the best I could ta stop the bleeding.” He said; his words far away despite the fact that he was now sitting next to you. After a few minutes, he offered you a lit cigarette.

“You think he’ll make it?” You whispered, not really wanting to know the answer.

“Aye. ‘e’s a strong lad, ‘e’ll make it.” Chibs said. You didn’t know how long you sat there before Clay and Gemma show up. You linked arms with Gemma and the two of you headed inside to wait for news. Time seemed to stand still and with every passing minute, it got a little harder for you to convince yourself he was going to be OK.

Part 6

20 Questions with Dr Ferox #20

Sometimes it blows my mind how many questions and comments you all have and want to share. This makes 400 we’ve got to in this format. Once again I’ve tried to tag people, but if you sent a question on Anon you’ll have to look yourself to see if you were answered.

@crazy-aquarium-lady said: Do you have any experience with farm or large animals in general? Goats for instance?

I spent the first few years of my veterinary career working in mixed practice, which included large animals and goats. I really did enjoy goats, though they often weren't kept as seriously as other livestock, but I'd have to admit I'm somewhat out of practice with large animals.

Anonymous said: omg all of your animal names are incredible. i once met two cocker spaniels called Beans and Trousers and that was pretty amazing

Bean and Trousers are great names too

@sketchingblanks said: Hi there Dr. Fox! Thank you for your wonderful blog and all that you do. My dwarf hamster recently passed away at the age of 3 and I'm a wildlife rehabilitator who has dealt with animal death many times before, but it's never quite the same when it's one of your own. However it did make me wonder what is the smallest animal you have ever worked with? Was it more fun or challenging? Question tax: How do you take your tea? I usually have something herbal (like peppermint/spearmint) with honey.

The smallest patient I've personally dealt with was a mouse. But the finch with the broken leg was pretty close. Believe it or not I don’t actually drink tea.

Anonymous said: Question: have you ever treated an arthropod (specifically tarantulas, because they can rupture their abdomen pretty easily) or know someone who specializes in that? Because I'm quite interested in knowing if vets provide care to arthropods, or if its better for the owner to perform medical care to their tarantula at home (ICU's, helping a bad molt, treating hemolymph leaks, etc).

I haven't personally treated an arthropod, though I learned a bit about them during work experience at the Melbourne Aquarium, most of their medicine seemed to be 'just don't make them sick'. There are vets that will treat them though, the Bird & Exotic Animal Clinic is my go-to for exotics (you should check out their facebook page).

Anonymous said: You dont have to reply to this if you dont want to, i just wanted to say i have rats and i love them so much and i will do anything they need at the vets. Because idk i thought maybe you might need encouragement that there are people who prioritize exotic animals health. I hear a lot of stories of people that wont get vet care for their rats but not a lot about people who do. Thought it might give you a little bright light amongst all the dark. Have a great day youre amazing.

People like you are definitely out there. Thank you for your comment.

Anonymous said: just needed to blow off a bit of steam because this still annoys me, but my father told me that taking a hamster to the vet to make sure she's healthy before taking her to college with me as a support pet was "a waste of money." granted, he hasn't taken the family cat to the vet in about seven years, so he generally seems to think that veterinary care is a waste of money. i love my hammy and i just want to make sure she's healthy, but since she isn't a cat or dog, she's "not worth it"

Anon, sounds like your father would think any dollar spent at a vet clinic is a waste of money, regardless of what sort of animal it was. There's not much you can do to change people's minds about this, so just do what you need to do.

Anonymous said: It's amazing how many people don't understand how economics works. They seem to expect vets to do everything for free or for cheap, but if they did that, how could they afford to eat? And besides that, you guys DESERVE to be paid for your time and effort. I wish more people thought about it like that instead of just looking at their bill and thinking that their pet's life isn't worth that much. Thank you for everything you do.

Veterinary medicine is one of the fields where people seem to think it's criminal for a practice to make a profit. Most other professions are not vilified for making a wage, but we're expected to like our jobs enough to work for free. Partly this is our own fault because we start to believe it after a while but we do frequently undercharge, do desexing surgery at cost, and treat strays and wildlife for free. The difficulty is most of this charity is invisible

Anonymous said: I want to say thank you as well because I thought I wanted to become a vet for the longest time, but reading this blog among others has actually taught me that it probably wouldn't be right for me. Now I'm more interested in something like a research professor. The amount of respect I have for you is boundless. I love seeing your work and following you and I think it's a good thing that I stumbled across this blog. This way I won't be stuck in a career that I wouldn't like.

Being stuck doing something you don't really like isn't a fun place to be. I'm glad you've found some more options and hope everything works out great for you.

Anonymous said: My favourite part of your blog has always been your vet stories, so I've been curious -- What kind of case/problem gives you the most satisfaction to solve?

Anything where I actually find a treatable diagnosis. Animals that get better 'mysteriously' are great and all, but I want to know why. And getting the answer is only bitter sweet if the answer is catastrophic or terminal. EPI, Addison’s and reconstructive cases are my favourite, because you can do so much good for them.

@daedricprincessxoxo said: Cute story for happiness: So a nurse-for-people brought in her dog for a sick visit. Unlike most human med people I've met, she was so respectful of those of us in veterinary medicine, and absolutely fascinated by how similar it all was to human medicine. Not only was she a dream client, her dog had freckles on its nose, which the vet adored too. What was funny is when she referred to the dog's spay as a hysterectomy instead.

It's great when you get a good one instead of a know-it-all. Technically a dog spay is an ovariohysterectomy though, we take those pesky ovaries out too.

Anonymous said: Im a vet assistant at a local shelter, and while helping a family look at dogs they remarked to me, "yeah our daughter is allergic to dog FUR but not dog HAIR. Do you know which dogs have just hair?" Needless to say, i was a little speechless and just recommended a poodle. Theres no real difference....right?

It's only semantics but some people like to use it to feel special. Hair and fur are chemically the same, if you're really allergic to one you're allergic to both, but hair is finer and typically longer so either doesn't shed or sheds much more rarely. It's weirdly common for poodle owner to be proud that their dogs have hair instead of fur. As long as they end up loving the dog, it doesn't really matter.

Anonymous said: Here's one: I work at a pet store. A man came in asking for a remote electric shock collar for a 3 lb Yorkie. Told him we carried nothing small enough to be safe. He told me it wasn't for barking - he and his wife had cattle, and when they went to visit the herd the dog would go pelting towards the cows. He said, "I just need something to drop er so she don't get stomped." I suggested a leash. He replied, "Nah, she don't like leashes."

Nothing the general public does or says surprises me anymore.

Anonymous said: I have a natural English Cocker. Her tail is heavy, constantly wagging, and a hazard to any legs in the vicinity :) Where I am there's a lot of working cockers, and hunters will swear up and down that docking is necessary because they'll ruin their tails in the brambles, etc. I'm not convinced - my (pet) dog loves diving into thick cover and this has never been an issue. Their ears are surely more of a risk, I'd think, but no-one's trying to crop those. Is there any real merit to docking?

No, there is no real merit to docking healthy tails and you're correct in assuming the ears of cocker spaniels are far more problematic for these dogs. Cocker Spaniels are the most notorious breed for difficult, drug resistant ear infections, with quite a few of them requiring lateral or total ear canal ablation surgery, but nobody would even think about docking Cocker Spaniel ears. This is because docking and cropping are done for aesthetics, not function.

@cakeandpi said: A long time ago, I took my cat in to the vet because he was limping badly and did not want to be handled. Turns out, rather than breaking his leg or anything like that, his hip joint had essentially eroded away and - to quote - “looked like swiss cheese”. His leg was amputated and it healed nicely, though he never let anyone close to that part of his body again. He had a long, easy, and mobile life, until he was roughly 18 years old (he was a shelter rescue) when his kidneys finally gave out on him for good. Whatever happened to his hip bone, it was unusual enough that the vet sent a sample to a vet research clinic. It’s been a few years since my cat passed, and even more since his amputation, but it helps a little to think that that sample might one day help, I don’t know, with orthopedic research or something of the sort. Maybe. Question tax: I really like your fantasy-animal science posts!

I of course have no way of knowing where the hip bone went, but I'm sure somebody, somewhere will make use of it. Veterinary Medicine is advancing all the time, which is the best thing about science, and accumulating raw materials and data is critical for us to be able to do so.

Anonymous said: hi dr ferox! i love your blog! earlier today my sister cut our cat's claws with human nail trimmers. i know you're not supposed to do that, but i don't know why. i looked at his claws after she told me she did it and they don't look hurt. should i be worried? thank you so much!

I use human nail trimmers on my cats' nails all the time. It's fine if your technique is good, though they're not the easiest device to use for that purpose.

@gemma-handyman said: Dear Dr Ferox, I've tried to find the answer via google but have come up short. Do you know why some cats have such an affinity for loaves of bread? For instance, my grandmother's cat, Cece, would drag loaves beneath my grandmother's bed and fiercely protect the pilfered loaf. She's not the only cat I've heard of with a strange penchant for gluten and carbohydrates. Do you know why some cats love loaves of bread? Question tax: came for the mythical breed breakdowns- stayed for the irl info

Cats can digest carbohydrates, and from a metabolic point of view they're likely treating it as glycogen in terms of dehydration. Some cats like novel chewing textures, celery leaves is another common thing for cats to like, so may be just chewing it for fun.

Anonymous said: I want to be a vet tech but everyone always says I'm selling myself short... vet techs are just as useful right?

Of course they are. Have you ever seen a human hospital function without nurses?

Anonymous said: So our clinic has a batch of neonate puppies. 10 of them. I'm clearly not going to be able to sleep for the foreseeable future, as I'm on puppy duty. At least they're cute.

Good luck bottle feeding the little squeakers. They'll turn into waddling balls of chaos soon enough.

@fndm-trsh-sht said: my cat is a lil shit- but a cute lil shit- t h a t i s a l l- *slinks awaayyy*

Most cats are buddy, but we love them anyway.

Anonymous said: Something about the angle of trashbags ears reminds me of a goblin. Hes wonderful

He is a bit of a gremlin, he's starting to grow into his ears though.

an explanation post and small update about that thing that recently happened with that one ex friend. just fyi, this is very long:

first, some backstory. i have an issue where i often end up staying in abusive relationships (friends/family/dating) for way too long for various reasons. that said, this friend. they were always problematic. they would continue aggressively making passes at me even tho i rejected them constantly. like really gross passes that reminded me of why i “hate (stereotypical) men”. bc it was real bro-style creeping. hitting on me incessantly. always hanging all over me and making any excuse to have physical contact. making gross innuendo “jokes” that went too far just… always. at one point they licked my ear when we were taking a photo together. etc.

now i confronted them on this many times. asked them to tone it down. explained how uncomfortable and stressed they made me. told them “i’m sorry but i just don’t feel that way and i wanna be friends” like god SO often. my sister (used to be friends w them too) even would sit and we’d try to explain to them why they needed to stop.

but of course, they’d always reply to this with extreme defensiveness. say i was just over thinking it. that this is just who they were. that they joke with ALL their friends this way (sidenote i’ve seen how squeamish they can make their other friends). that “maybe i should rethink my standards for what is okay and not okay”. would even accuse me of being paranoid and “gaslighting” them. even when it got better, they were always making little jokes like “oh srry i wanted to pat you on the back but idk if you’ll get mad at me” like they really wanted to let me know i was in the wrong. and beyond that, they always seemed to be like actively trying to find new avenues of hitting on me.

and that was just the personal space issues. they’d also like rage at games when we played together? like slamming my controller to the floor when they lost. being overly competitive. being rude to my other friends if they were “holding them back” in a game. they’d actually criticize people who didn’t agree with how they wanted to play as being “unskilled” and “not real gamers”. and if you ever were beating them, they’d be all angry and say stuff like you were being “ cheap”. any mistake they made in a game was “people cheating”. but any time they did well (including purposeful exploiting), it was a boast worthy achievement. trashtalk all day but only they were allowed to do it.

it was weird too bc TBH THEY AREN’T EVEN ALL THAT GOOD. like overall, i’d almost always beat them. my sister too. they were mediocre at best. but of course… they’d literally make statements like “i almost always beat you” and “i usually win” when it was just… such a rare occurrence. its just… when it came to trying to have a fun play session with people, they put the game and winning above… you know… having fun w the rest of us? and sidenote they were always SUPER picky about what game we played. and when it came to options like “what guns to use” or “what stage to play”… you know how often people take turns so everyone is happy? on their turn, they’d get respect. but on everyone elses turn, they’d always like… fuck around and change options back to theirs and like revert stuff and just…

not that age matters but did i mention they were 27. i mean idk i only bring it up bc they reminded me so much of a little kid like esp about videogames. but there were a lot of other issues with them too. but i’ll just bring up the last big one. they… morally/politically? they tended to be in a cool direction in general. v “supports human rights overall” kinda person. but… they were the type who were idk v quick to judge? they would make extreme judgement calls with no information. they’d always end up fixated on conspiracies rather than perceiving things with moderation. people can think what they want imo, but the issue here is how they needed anyone close to them to agree with them too? 

example: one time i was driving w them in an area that had very little shops and it was late and i had forgotten to pick up a gift for someone we were meeting. just a small thing to thank them for a favor. the ONLY store open and around was walmart. yes fine walmart sucks but  idk i needed a gift. i mentioned i was gonna stop by there and they were like “no not walmart”. and i’m like “yeah i know lol” and they were like “no seriously we cant go in there”. long story they refused to go in, wouldn’t wait in the car, and made it out like if i went in that there would be a big problem. i ended up showing up to the person empty handed and it sucked. another time just recently i was gonna get some lays potato chips and they were like “ew no you can’t buy anything from the cocacola company” and like shamed me and walked off so i couldn’t get them. idk this kinda stuff happens all the time tbh? but it doesn’t stop at just like pretentious annoyance. they’d go HARD with political opinions too and if you disagreed w them they’d HATE you. not just internet forums or strangers. but friends. one time my sister (who for the sake of the story is pan and leaning towards non-binary) disagreed with them when they made a sweeping statement on fb about how some specific thing made everyone “transphobic”. anyways when my sister tried to discuss it with them they literally sicked their friends on her and insulted and browbeat her until she just had to leave. she got stressed at the end and yelled back finally and then they sent her a pm like “i’m really disappointed in you. i’ll be waiting for an apology when you’re ready to give it”. lol long story short my sis dropped them at that point. as she put it “i thought highschool was over”. she was already super mad at them for how they were treating me sexually anyhow tho like... srry but i guess one of my points is my sister is like one of the coolest, nicest, best people i know. she never drops people. but she dropped THEM. over the years i’ve asked them why they go from 0 to 11 so fast and why they don’t... idk... “lead” people into agreeing with them rather than angrily and violently just immediately demanding it? and as they put it “people with strong opinions will never change so don’t bother with them” and “i act how i do as an example to others of how to be a good person”. but god i guess just recently i came to realize that they were just... i don’t think they cared about other people. they just wanted to protect THEMSELVES above all else? they wanted a reason to judge people. it was all an excuse for them to feel self-righteous and act entitled and superior. oops i forgot to mention that they’re pan and gender-neutral as well? maybe they identify as trans but idk. the only reason i mention it is bc they definitely use it as a way to shame people and feel superior. i know it’s easy to be sensitive about that stuff considering, but they go above and beyond. and it’s weird that they’re all about human rights and w/e bc GOD they’re so gross sexually and... srry another example. so they’re a furry. totally fine imo. but one day we were walking around a downtown area with a lot of bars late at night and they were wearing fox ears/tail and bein themselves nbd. but we passed by a “drunkbus” right as cookie-cutter bros spilled out of it. one of them was like “hey i didn’t know the furry convention was in town” and i immediately got super angry and turned to say something. but then i looked to see my friend had just continued to walk away? i took a breath and walked back to them and was like “i’m so sorry like do you want me to say something?” and they were like “it’s okay some day i’ll fuck them until they like it” or “until i turn them” or god idk i think they maybe even used the term “rape”... alarm bells tbh. blahh i won’t go into any more details but lets just say how they act and how they say a person SHOULD act is a dictionary definition of hypocrisy. well anyways, i guess my point i wanted to make with this backstory is, as i’ve finally come to realize... they’re an immature, self-righteous, spoiled person with a pretty distinct martyr complex. and they’re kinda rapey. they always used to complain about all this drama they had and how awful everyone was to them... and it always sounded like “really bad luck”? but i realize now that they were just a tornado of selfishness with like no emotional control and they couldn’t keep friends for too long before it just had to end in a big flaming ball. sorry like i should point out i know they’re obv full of mental illness... but i don’t think they really go to therapy or seek help for any of it? like so many of us on here are pretty messed up but we do our best? this person is not doing their best. they clearly feel the world should change before they do. anyways anyways anyways. this friendship lasted for idk 2 years? 3? it was weird that i didn’t notice my own reactions as warning signs. like when i don’t know someone too well or am having issues... i’ll often bring another friend to hangouts as a sort of buffer. maybe uncool, but it helps. usually this only lasts for like one or two hangouts. but with this ex friend, it lasted the entire period. whenever i tried to hang out w them alone, a much bigger incident would always happen, and i’d go back to square one. but okay. the actual story of the incident: so i was always trying to get them to hang out with me and another friend bc i felt like we all had v similar hobbies, and this past tuesday it finally happened. we all hung out at other friend’s place and played games and ate food and outside of exfriend’s usual little issues, it went really well. at some point it was mentioned that sonic mania released that day. it was something we had all been very excited about, but we already had plans that day and some of us (me) didn’t want to experience the game the first time in a distracted social environment. but i mentioned “ugh i have a doc appointment early tomorrow but i’ll still dl it right when i get home. i better not play it tho lol weh”! when they heard i was buying it, they were like “oh man you gotta let me come over and try it”. i knew they were a big fan of the guy who made it and a huge sonic fan, but also that they had just lost their job and money was tight (i had to buy their food that day). i had a feeling they’d morally be against pirating it temporarily until they could afford it. so idk i was like “hey listen as long as we only play like the first act each, i could take you to my place before i drive you home. but only if you’re okay with being v quick bc i have dr in the morning”. sidenote they refuse to drive and don’t use a bike so hanging out with them always involved carting them around. and no before they lost their job (v recently), they coulda def afforded it. they literally were constantly buying insanely expensive collectibles like think of the most expensive gaming stuff you can and they prob have it. sealed panzer dragoon saga. vectrex with every game. fami twin with working disc system parts. ique with most games loaded. mint physical laserdisc copy (beta?) of dragons lair from the arcade machine. whatever. my point is they spent all their money on toys instaid of bettering themselves. we all do it but they took it to an extreme. one other thing... they only would communicate over their parent’s lan line phone and over facebook. they refused to have a cellphone. back to story. they excitedly agreed to my conditions and we went back to my place and installed the game. i started playing and god it was amazing (obv)! i got to the end of act 1 in a couple of minutes and was like “okay i should rly quit and hand it to you” but they were like “no no finish the zone” and tbh it was so good i agreed. so i played until i beat the boss and then i was like “okay i can’t go further” and quit and then handed it to them. i think the whole zone took me like... 5 minutes? this is when it started getting weird. i noticed my gf had called and like idk she was a bit worried bc i normally call her after i get home from my other friend’s place (we hang every tuesday like clockwork) and it had gotten really late but i forgot to let her know. it was really sweet and i didn’t want her to worry so i was like “hey uh shoot do you mind if i call her?” and tbh they were like already so absorbed in playing the game they weren’t even paying attention to me. but i had given them the rly comfy chair but it blocked the exit to the room. i couldn’t even squeeze by unless they moved first. so i started like asking them ‘hey uh do you mind pausing and moving so i could get by?”... nothing. again i asked. ignored. this went on for like idk 30 sec? a minute? until i finally was like hovering my finger over to hit the pause button like “can you please just pause so i can leave” like... and only then did they finally say “well fine but i don’t even know how to pause”. let me take the time to point out that they are prob the most techy person i know. esp about old game systems. they build flashcarts and repair ancient consoles and solder and mod and they worked the past 4(?) years at a legit retro game store. and they were amazing to begin with. it’s a small thing, but they coulda figured out how to pause a switch. they’d played one many times before too. so finally i have them pause it. and i’m like still standing there for 30 sec or so and they still aren’t budging? and i’m like “you uhh gotta get up so i can get by the chair is blocking me”. they continue to idk ignore??? i finally have to literally pick up the chair WITH them still in it and move it aside. only then could i pass. idk but i didn’t get angry or anything bc i was just relieved to finally get by. as i walked out of the room i mentioned to them “hey if i take too long just keep playing obv but when i walk in please pause it and quit immediately so i don’t see later level content plz” (i’m a big baby and have been avoiding all details for so long and was looking forward to the surprise lol). and they were like “okay” or something. i went out to my car and talked w my gf for god idk 15 or 20 min? i didn’t want to talk that long but she was going to bed soon and was a bit down/ill and i still wanted to talk to her and idk i knew worst case my one friend would love the extra time to play. and i felt like if i stayed out that long i could go in to a very satisfied friend, you know? so i get off the phone and head inside. i enter the room and am like “okay i’m back plz pause it like we gotta go”! ignored. i ask again kinda lol trying to plug my ears and not look. ignored. at that point i notice the same song from the first zone is playing and i look over and it is in fact the same level and i’m like ??? “wait how are you still on the first level??” and they were like “oh i’m completing all of the special stages”. the first thought i had was like oh wow cool they really wanted to stick to my initial request of only playing the first zone? unnecessary but v nice of them! i guess i was really reaching for an explanation lol... so whatever they still are playing so i sit down next to them and am watching them play for another minute or so. i was about to say something bc they still weren’t stopping but then i notice how close they are to the boss and am like “oh okay cool you’re p much to the boss so you’ll be done super quick”. they keep playing. at that point i notice they’;re like... taking sonic up and around the level kinda in circles? and backtracking? like? it’s really weird and i’m like “wait what are you doing” and they’re like “trying to get rings to complete the special stages”... so i’m like “uhh sorry tbh but i’m already way past when i wanted to go to bed is there any way you can just... go to the boss”?? and they’re still doing their thing and ignoring me and so i speak up again like “cmon like i’m really sorry but this doctors appointment is an obligation and i really need to get to bed”. and at that point they pause the game. stand up angrily. kinda fling the controller so it hits the table and falls onto the hard floor. they start kinda flailing their arms angrily and say in this really sour tone “oh im sorry i just thought you were gonna idk let me PLAY the GAME”??? i start replying like “listen i’m sorry i just like i don’t have a choice in the matter like i have to go to bed like you had like 3 times as much time as i did and idk maybe you can take the switch into the car or something idk??” and they just kinda angrily say “whatever whatever just stop yelling at me”. btw i’m not yelling. i’m definitely definitely not yelling. i’m not even angry. calm. nice. confused at best? and this isn’t one of those things where it’s like “im not yelling bc when i yell you really KNOW it”... i just wasn’t yelling by anyone’s terms. at that point i’m like “listen i’m sorry i just don’t know why this is becoming such an issue like idk maybe you can wear headphones in the car and keep playing later levels or...” and that’s when they’re like “it doesn’t matter just STOP yelling at me”. and the chair is in the way of the exit and needs to be like lifted and moved so we can leave. but at that point they take their foot and just KICK the chair across the room. at that point i’m kinda like “listen i’m sorry if i have a tone in my voice or am hurting your feelings but tbh it’s kinda hard to remain perfectly calm when you’re sorta throwing a temper tantrum and..” and that’s when they shouted as loud as they could “OKAY NOPE UH UH BYEEE” and swung open the door and ran through the house to the exit door. i’m trying to call after them like “shit i’m really sorry but i don’t have time to chase after you i gotta go to bed please can i just take you home like if you leave i gotta just let you and go to bed” and they ignore me and run outside. it’s like 2am at this point btw. i kinda go outside to check if they’re standing there cooling down but no. long gone. ran down the street i think. so i go back inside. turn the light out. and lock the door. i just dont have time to deal with this. i want to but i can’t. but i sit there for a few minutes. and... (maybe) the mentally ill/abused side of me is like “well you COULD go look for them and try to calm them down and drive them home and it wouldn’t take THAT much longer than you were gonna already spend driving them, right? worst case if you don’t find them you can just go home and go to bed”. and so i head outside.as i enter my car tho, i get this weird gut awful feeling of deja vu? i realise pretty quickly that this scenario was pretty similar to the ones i had pretty regularly with my one really bad ex gf. the one who was a manipulative sociopath that used me and cheated on me and also had no emotional control etc etc etc lol? and idk i was surprised bc... i thought that this part of my life had been over. but still... the dumb side of my brain ignored that and carried on. i drove along the path i assumed they walked, thinking maybe they woulda taken the time to calm down. after a bit i finally caught up to them. i pulled up slowly and kinda called out like “hey i’m really sorry like i never wanted it to go down that way like you’re my friend like let me take you home i’m really sorry”. they ignored me for a bit and kept doing that angry car walk thing as i had to slowly follow behind and continue apologizing. finally they stopped and came to the window. they were like “listen you can’t talk to me like that and abuse me like that like what you did was so awful and bullying and ..” and went on like that for a min. and i was like “listen i’m sorry and i know me using that one word in particular must have really set you off but idk..” like trying to explain to them why i said “temper tantrum” (BC THATS WHAT THEY FUCKING HAD BTW THATS WHAT IT GD WAS) but i was trying to be nice about it? so i continued on “well i mean the reason i said that was okay like i know you were agitated but you kinda like tossed my controller haphazardly and it hit the floor and yeah i’m sure it was an accident...” and at that point they stuck their head inside the window like super close to my face and shouted as loud and angrily and full of spittle as they fucking could “WELL MAYBE IT WAS A FUCKING ACCIDENT THEN”!!!! i’m like... idk... adrenaline just dumps into my body. i’m giving this person so so so many chances tonight. being so nice. and this is a problematic friend to begin with. and they’re shouting in my face like this as i try to apologize to them so i can drive them home after they ran off. but i’m a pacifist and i try to avoid conflict. but still... i’m like, probably quietly, “you... you can’t just yell at me like that. you aren’t allowed to yell at me like that.” and they open their mouth and start shouting more. and that’s when i shout back “I WON’T LET YOU SHOUT AT ME LIKE THAT”!!! idk if it scared them or what like i know i’m pretty booming and alarming when i shout idk but regardless they yanked their head out of the window and backed away from the car and i split second checked they were clear and i just floored it. but... i quickly slammed on the breaks. took a breath. decided i didn’t want it to be like this (do you see how stupid/messed up i am). i put it in reverse and turned around to back up. but i have to slam on the breaks. thank god i was only idling at that point. bc they’re pressed RIGHT up against my back bumper. i’m trying to comprehend all this bc there’s a v big sidewalk and they were on it when i started to speed off so why are they right behind my car now? a BIG alarm bell goes off in my head but i ignore it. i stare at them as they wait pressed against my bumper for like half a minute, giving them “what are you doing” eyes and gestures. finally they come back to the window. i’m like “listen. i’m really really sorry. it’s okay if you hate me. we don’t have to talk about it or at all. i made a mistake. i’m very sorry. can i just... take you home? i feel bad. we can try and work out this stuff later if we have to”. at that point they start yelling at me again (not screaming but just normal yelling) and telling me how awful and bullying and abusive etc i am and how their reactions were justified and idek bc they started walking off again. FINALLY. FINALLLLLY. my brain accepts this situation as fairly impossible and unreasonable and i decide i gotta be done. i just... can’t? anymore?? even if i wanted to... i don’t have time? so i pull up next to them and say sternly “you know what? you can’t treat your friends like this or they will LEAVE you.” and i sped off. i think i heard them screaming after me like “YOU SHOULD TAKE YOUR OWN ADVICE” but god knows like my car is junk but i had floored it so they were long gone. okay so that’s PRETTY much the end of it. i decided pretty quickly after that that i was DONE with this person forever. that this wasn’t the kind of friendship i wanted. over the next few days i came to realize i should have been done with this person almost immediately. again, weird parallels to my worst ex. you don’t have to be dating someone or romantic w them for it to be a super abusive relationship. well anyhow i decided to avoid facebook or communicating w them for a bit so i could figure out how to like “officially end it”. because i was sure that they’d have gone on fb and written one of their common “i’m sorry i acted that way BUT” fake apologies where they pretend to be sorry but then negate the apologies by justifying all their behavior by making me out as some super abusive monster. 3 days later, i bite the bullet and check facebook, bc i realize this also is a pretty easy way for me to like... end it with them in a polite and cordial way? to pretend i don’t hate them. to talk to them in a way that hopefully keeps them from freaking out at me the next time our paths cross? also bc deep down i still do remember the good times and have a bit of respect for them. sure enough, it was there. the half-apology that leads into “you need to learn how to talk to people”. “you bullied me just like this person”. “when you talk to anyone you should use this tone”. tbh i only barely glazed over it. i started my reply along the lines of “i don’t want to get into a big discussion about what happened, but i think it would be best if we parted ways. i don’t think we’re compatible as friends. i hope we can be polite if we ever run into each other again. i’m really sorry that it turned out this way.” etc etc etc. part way in, i noticed their last short msg. sent way after the initial bunch of “sorry not sorry”s. it was just a half sentence. “i guess i should apologize for jumping in front of your car...” ... THAT FUCKING ASSHOLE. THAT BASTARD. THEY REALLY DID IT. THEY REALLY WERE TRYING TO FORCE ME TO INJURE THEM WITH MY CAR SO THEY COULD ENTRAP ME OR SUE ME OR FUCK MY LIFE UP. I THOUGHT I WAS BEING CRAZY AND PARANOID WHEN I HAD THAT THOUGHT BUT IT WAS TRUE. THAT ABSOLUTE LUNATIC. *deep breath* i’m still shaken. it was just a fluke that i didn’t step on the gas before i noticed them against my bumper. it EASILY could’ve gone down in the worst way. god. and all this over me asking them to stop playing sonic mania. tbh the experience kinda soured the game a bit for me? i mean... thank god it’s so good but really who even gives a shit bc it’s just a game like GOD fucking DAMN i can’t believe i had something so FUCKED happen at this stage in my life. i know it’s a really self-hating thing to do to blame myself for having someone like that around but... my. god. i ended up sending the fb message that i was initially planning and ignoring all the impulses to scream at them or call some authority (idek what i could do here) or tell them they need immediate help or what bc what the fuck. and i haven’t checked fb since. i wanna be done forever. i don’t ever wanna see or hear or hear about this person again. it’s a bit silly but i’m cleaning house and getting rid of all the stuff they got for me (i rejected most of their “wooing” gifts but a few still got through bc general gift exchange”. i know it’s messed up but i even washed all the clothes i was wearing w them regardless if it needed a wash or not. maybe it was symbolic. but they’re dead to me. god. it’s not just for the best it’s goddamn mandatory.

ANYWAYS so that’s it i guess. sorry i know how long this was. i don’t REALLY expect anyone to read through all this. but if you do, plz lmk so i can say thanks i guess lol? it’s just nice to get it all out there bc it kinda messed me up... really bad? idk. and oh um i’ll still reply to people individually for asking about the previous post that related to this? but it’s taking me a bit to do replies bc i’m just... kinda scared regarding social stuff rn considering.  i guess the last thing i’ll say is if part of you is telling yourself that someone is abusive and you find yourself constantly making really big considerations or umm excuses just to hang out with someone? maybe don’t. there are many good people out there for you. abusive people can be dangerous. be careful and try to surround yourself with nice, happy people. <3

for the second-to-last day of mermay, here’s a zolu au maddie @baratiepromise and i made. there’s a lot more of it than this as we made up like. A Lot. but i doubt i’ll write any more of it than what’s here. regardless, hopefully this’ll be enough? idk. I… still don’t know how to add read mores on mobile

Title: The Iron Statue

Summary: Zoro moves to a new town and becomes acquainted with a local urban legend.

A worn black truck rumbled through the street, a moving trailer pulled behind it. Zoro had been driving for a few hours now, and after a few wrong turns along the way he was positive this was the right place. It looked the same from the pictures he’d seen, the little houses and stores all matching up. It was a tiny fishing town, mostly ignored by tourists despite the fact it boasts a number of nice beaches as there were bigger towns with nicer beaches. Zoro knew his house was farther out from the more populated streets, the moving truck might’ve even still been there to show him where he was going if he was lucky.

Zoro’s eyes scanned the town around him, mostly empty at this time of day. It was so early in the morning that the town still seemed to be asleep, but Zoro wasn’t tired. The truck approached the center of town and a large statue caught Zoro’s eye. It was about ten feet tall including the concrete pedestal it was set up on. Made of rusting iron was the figure of what appeared to be a merman reaching up above himself, tail curled at the base and face curled into a cruel grin. The merman had short hair, sharp teeth, and Zoro could just see a scar under the statue’s eye. Zoro couldn’t read the sign on the side of the pedestal as he drove by it, but he would have to go look at it later. As the statue grew smaller in his rear view mirror, Zoro felt curiosity tugging at the back of his mind. The merman had his attention, that was for sure.

Zoro’s house was an old wooden building above a cliff. It had been empty for a while, the last owner had drowned suddenly and, luckily for Zoro, it had been left with a fair amount of furniture. The place had been cheap, which was surprising as the cliff it rested on looked over a beautiful and secluded beach. Zoro couldn’t imagine any reason for the place to be so inexpensive, but he wasn’t going to complain. Zoro rolled up to it only a few minutes after passing the statue. Before he could look into that, though, he had to unpack his truck.

Black boots crunched on the gravel driveway for almost an hour as Zoro unloaded boxes from his trailer. The movers he’d hired had come and gone, leaving Zoro’s home full of boxes of what he had sent ahead. The town woke up as Zoro moved in, and Zoro became aware of someone approaching. He didn’t really have neighbors, his house was far from others in town because he’d wanted a place with privacy. Someone from town must’ve come to greet him regardless.

Zoro held a box to his hip and waved, but the approaching person seemed too solemn to notice. The expression was unfitting for greeting a new neighbor.

“You’re the one moving in here?” the person asked, stopping in front of Zoro. He was a man, old enough that his hair had started going grey.

“That would be me,” Zoro said. The man didn’t look happy, his face a mix of mourning and fear. Is he afraid of Zoro? Why would he seek Zoro out if he was? “Something wrong?”

“Don’t go to that beach alone,” the man said, pointing to the beach Zoro’s home overlooked. “It isn’t safe. You’ll be drowned.”

“I’m not a bad swimmer, I’ll be fine,” Zoro said. The guy came all this way to tell him he needed a lifeguard?

“No, there’s a monster in that water. He’ll get you if you go in there. If you value your life, don’t swim. Steer clear of the beach altogether if you can,” the man said.

“A monster? I’m a little old for fairy tales,” Zoro said. The man must’ve been a sailor, they were known for their superstition.

“This is no fairy tale. It’s killed at least three dozen people over the past few years,” the man said “The thing looks unassuming with its pretty tail and all, but it’ll kill you and dump your body on the shore.”

“Tail?” Zoro asked.

“Yeah, it’s got a tail like a koi. Very beautiful, all red and white…” the man said “But don’t let it fool you. It’ll drag you under the water if you aren’t careful.”

Zoro recognized the description, but just barely. It reminded him of that statue from before.

“Is that what that big statue is of?” Zoro asked, gesturing towards the town.

“You saw it coming in?” The man asked “Yeah, it’s of the monster, though it’s a memorial. On its base is the name of everyone it’s drowned so far. It targets kids and teens, gets them to the water and pulls them under. Then it leaves the corpses on the shore for someone else to find. Like it’s killing them for sport.”

“Thanks for the warning.” Zoro says, nodding. “I’ll keep it in mind.”

“You better. I’d hate to see them add another name to that plaque.”

The man turned and walked off, leaving Zoro to unload the rest of his truck.

It took only three days for Zoro to ignore the man’s warning. The beach was quiet and uninviting to townsfolk, so Zoro thought it would be a perfect place to train. He could be uninterrupted for hours, everyone else far too superstitious for their own good. Zoro was sure that the “monster” was just the creation of grieving townspeople who wanted something to blame for the loss of kids who couldn’t swim. Though even if it were true and there really was some murderous creature in the water, Zoro wasn’t worried. He was fairly sure he could take it on if he needed to.

Zoro’s private beach was at the bottom of the cliff. The rocks reached around ten feet above the water, trapping in not only the beach but several dozen feet out into the water in the form of large, jetty-like cliffs. They formed a U-shaped cove, and Zoro was fairly sure they were natural. The only manmade part he could tell was the a path leading down from the top of the cliff only a few feet from Zoro’s house. Zoro found there to be a small blockade at the top of the path on the first visit, but he moved it aside easily. No superstitious old men would stop him from training on the beach.

Zoro carried a box of weights down to the sand, figuring he could just leave them down there considering how scared everyone else was of the mythical mermonster in the water. He went down every day for hours, spending his time on the sand training or sleeping. He rarely went into the water, and never went deep. Though not one for urban legends, his gut told him not to venture too far into the water. Something about it felt off.

What felt most off about the cove was a feeling Zoro noticed after about a week of training there. He felt he was being watched, but the cliff hosted no spying eyes above him and the water held no observing boats. Boats avoided this cove like the plague the way swimmers avoided the beach. Zoro ignored the feeling, but it was constantly present. It only got stronger as time went on. Zoro took to watching around him as he trained, looking for the source of his feeling. Just as he was about to brush it off as paranoia, he noticed something moving in the water. Zoro only caught a flash of red and it was gone.

Another three days went by. Zoro had seen more of the red flashes in the water, but he had yet to figure out what they were. Zoro didn’t know what it was, but at the back of his mind the old man’s description of the merman was pulling at his imagination. A red tailed merman, that was the monster’s appearance. That was impossible, though Zoro couldn’t help but wonder…

Zoro dropped the weights in his hands and approached the water. When water was halfway up his shins, he stopped and cupped his hands to his mouth like a megaphone.

“If you’re out there, show yourself!” Zoro yelled.

Silence answered his call. Zoro’s arms fell to his sides. After a moment, he raised them to call out again.

“Come on!” Zoro yelled. He was starting to feel a little stupid, standing in the water and shouting at an old wive’s tale. Just as he was about to turn around, a head popped up from the water.

Zoro will forever deny it scared him, or that he jumped, but he won’t deny how surprising it was to hear the merman laugh for the first time. He grinned, and it looked nothing like the statue. He seemed, for all intents and purposes… normal. The short hair and scar matched that of the statue, but he didn’t seem malicious.

“I like your hair,” the merman said. He ducked under a moment to move closer, so he was only about a yard in front of Zoro. When he came up again, Zoro noticed gills on his neck.

“My hair?” Zoro asked. He hadn’t really known what to expect from an apparent monster, but compliments definitely weren’t it. Though shocked, Zoro still had the sense to back away from him. If he noticed, he said nothing. Zoro was only up to his ankles in the water, it would be hard for the merman to pull him under like this.

“Yeah, your hair. It’s green, like plants. I’ve never seen humans with green hair before,” the merman said. He ducked under again, surfacing again when his stomach was on the sand. He was right in front of Zoro this time, and he propped his head up above the water with his hands. Zoro could see clear, reddish fins along the side of his arms.

“My name’s Luffy. What’s yours?” the merman asked. Up close, Zoro could see sharp teeth in Luffy’s smile. He still seemed genuine, somehow, even with his gruesome mouth.

“Zoro. Roronoa Zoro,” Zoro said. He backed out of the water entirely now. The smile slipped off Luffy’s face.

“Are you leaving already?” Luffy asked. He moves up even more, pulling himself to the sand. His tail–red and white like a koi, just as the old man said–was still in the water, but his torso was only in water when hit by waves.

“I’m not stupid,” Zoro said, figuring he should just cut to the chase. He never liked beating around the bush. “I know what you’re after.”

“You do? Then why’re you leaving?” Luffy asks. “We can’t be friends if you leave.”

“Friends?” Zoro asked. Luffy nodded.

“I’ve tried asking people before, but once they agree to come with me, they always fall asleep,” Luffy said “Isn’t that rude? Who falls asleep after agreeing to play with someone?”

“You thought they fell asleep?” Zoro asked.

“Well, yeah. What else would they be doing?” Luffy asked. “I always leave them back on shore so they know when they are when they wake up, but none of them ever come back. They’re supposed to come back, though. A lot of them said they would, too! But none of them ever came back, and now no one comes at all. It’s… lonely.”

As Luffy talked, Zoro realized that it must have never occurred to a fish like Luffy that there were creatures who couldn’t swim. The merman wasn’t a monster, and the story of the town was not one of horror. If anything, it was a tragedy. Luffy didn’t seem to have anyone, and he didn’t understand what he’d done. He couldn’t have been much younger than Zoro… Luffy was around 17, if Zoro had to guess. If he’d been doing it over a few years, a few of them had to have happened when Luffy was a child. He didn’t want to tell Luffy about drowning. Zoro wasn’t sure how he’d take the truth of what he’d done. No, Zoro would keep his thoughts to himself.

“…I can be your friend,” Zoro said. Luffy’s face lit up.

“Really? That’s awesome! Can we go swim-”

“But,” Zoro said, cutting Luffy off before Luffy could say anything more “I don’t like the water that much. I won’t go swimming with you. If you try pulling me under regardless, I won’t come back ever again.”

It was a lie, Zoro loved the water. However, he didn’t want to risk Luffy pulling him under. And Luffy would pull him under, if given the chance, though Zoro wasn’t lying when he said he wouldn’t come back if Luffy did.

Luffy, in his own head, barely took a moment to consider the condition Zoro laid out. He had lived by himself for years, and he hated being alone more than anything. If Zoro would be his friend, he’d accept any rules.

“Deal!” Luffy said, tail splashing in the water with excitement. “We’re going to be great friends. And don’t worry, I’ll make sure you like the water soon and then we can play. I can even show you where I live!”

Zoro just nodded, sitting down in the sand just out of Luffy’s reach. He’d have to be careful around Luffy, that was for sure. Though Zoro thought–hoped?–it would be worth it. Luffy interested him, and Zoro found himself wanting to get to know him. Zoro knew it would be the start of an undeniably dangerous friendship. If Zoro let his guard down, Luffy could very well kill him without even knowing he was dead. But so long as Zoro was careful, what could go wrong?

SZ: hi.

first thing first..... T H A N K S ....for so many things... talking to me, being nice to me (even when i was pain in the ass) .... being frank and open..... talking whatever came to your mind (well that you do with everyone) ..... answering to some long emails... with equally wrong emails....

you know i had drafted a mail earlier but had to delete it ... thought might as well write something new and fresh..... and this is what you have done to me ..... When i have free time .... i think "let me write to aditi" ..... sometimes..... i even wake up in the middle of my sleep to check...... if there is any message from you.... but unfortunately only calls or messages i get then at that time are from GC .... some how he just knows when i am busy.... or sleeping in office hours and he will call me..... the joke i tell my mom is "if i want GC to call me ..... i should sleep" and hola ...tring tring ....

initially when we started talking...... i did want to know why is she talking so much to me .... but then i let go of it ..... realized later you are talkative.....

i dont talk to many people..... and i dont remember when i had written 100 odd emails .... to someone ...... i guess there have been days when we have completed more than 50 odd emails in a single day.... like today we are already near 42......

two reasons i dont talk to many people in office is 1) my last name: they have pre concieved notion about me and feel uncomfortable talking to me ...... and i dont like when people are uncomfortable .... and they do make it previous obvious

2) whatever little interaction i have had with some ..... i just dont connect... i dont feel the need to ... or in simpler words..... i dont find anyone else interesting enough

yes i like you,.... want to know you..... but i want to know you at your pace and your convenience .... i am not in a hurry..... but then its like you kind of sweet like an ice cream..... and i get worried... what if it just melts away .... so i want to know things about you......

all those questions hanky panky and all is just to get you open up..... as i always say.... i was also 24 for one full year..... and i know things that happen.... i am no saint either.... and i had a car since i was 16..... so had my share of back seat action too....

sometimes...... its obvious that i am the distraction .... that keeps you away from ex......... sometimes.... its just that ... you have too much stored in yourself ...... and you dont have the channel to release it all..... so you just treat me like an "agony uncle" or lets say punching bag.... i am ok with that.....

And you are currently occupying lot of my mental space..... whether is sleeping or awake ....

like today i didnt need to send the photo which i sent in morning ...... or didnt need to think about you when i saw rainbow ..... didnt need to go for walk ..... i went yesterday also .... the reason : well yesterday i knew you would be busy from 6-7 while driving to go home and today i knew you would be sleeping while i was awake so i thought might as well go for a walk

talking sarcastically or flirting or being funny is natural to me and so is the serious attitude.... seen a lot of things in life....

you dont like flirting we can always stop.... it will be difficult but i can stop.... no more checking out .... btw its not the ass which i check out first in a lady....... its something else

chalo will send across this email when you are back from lunch..... and done with your work

ohhhh last thing ..... you are B E A U T I F U L ....enjoy have a nice day .

I: God!! nobody is ever going to let me read this email with full concentration. *angry face*

Will you stop thanking me?? I didn't do anything FOR you. i'm selfish that way. So stop!! I did everything because I wanted to. I didn't do any favors for you. I talk to you because i like talking to you. I'm nice to you because you have been nice to me (no indecency). I'm frank and open... Well, that's just who I am. I speak my mind. And I respond to your long emails because I love talking to you and I love long emails. Long emails signify how much willing you are to talk to me. It shows your effort, that you are ready to type so much because you so much to say.

Maybe you can send me that email you deleted. I would want to read everything you type to send me because that's what you wanted to say to me.

I know how you feel. you have done the same thing to me too. I was late for lunch and made Kaalu and H sir wait becasue I wanted to finish writing an email to you.

It's true that I am talkative but I don't talk soooooo much with everybody. I'm friendly with everyone but not everybody is my friend. So, I talked so much with you because I chose to and not because I have a compulsive need of talking.

And BTW you spoke to me first. I had my seat changed and you had asked me something. I think you had asked me what I do here, etc. and then why my place was changed. I remember it was dark and there was nobody in the office except you and me and you were filling your water bottle and laughed (that cute laugh I love) when I told you that because French Translator and I talk a lot they changed my place. (I know it was silly of me. I didn't even care that you're a C (last name) and I shouldn't have and I should've maintain a decorum with you)

"i dont talk to many people" Tha'ts what Kaalu said, you don't talk to too many people. And if you talk, nobody hears your voice. So, it's more or less like you don't talk at all.

And those days are the best days where we write over 50 emails to each other.

I know why you wouldn't talk to people here in OIA. I saw and felt how lonely you are. and then you talked to me one day and I felt "god! ye accha baat karta hai. Decency toh baapre.. chalakti hai!! Has a nice soothing, amazing voice. English mast hai." And then Idk how and when I started talking to you. I don't remember. All I know is that I must've blabbered a lot for no reason, forcing you to be in the conversation. Do you remember how I started talking to you so much after you spoke to me once? (answer me) I actually you spoke to me twice. once ws in the elevator when we were going down. I think we started talking about cars and books when we would leave. And then you would advise me like an uncle to drive safe and use this direction than the one I use. Ufff... how annoying I found you then!! Treating me like I'm 10!

So, as i was saying i thought u r introvert n shy n lonely n dont have many friends here. but i was happy to see you chitchatting with anand sir then.. Sometime in february i think. I was relieved..

I don't understand what preconceived notions they would have about you.

People know you're C because you speak THEIR language. (That's how I found out). I would always see you talk with Kapil. And I wud make a face like why does this man have to talk to him (Atul), bichara.. paka raha hoga Atul ko! But then i found out u r a Chaturvedi and I slapped my forehead. Like whyyyyyyy............... But then your last name never felt like a hindrance for me. You last name never bothered me. Is that strange for you? (answer me)

So, you know how I feel about you not being here right now? So, you know how I feel about you leaving? There is nobody interesting in this office. There's nobody who reach my standards and actually hold a conversation with me. You have no idea how ecsatic I was to talk to you everytime!! I would wait for NL to leave so that I could talk to you. But you would shoo me away like a dog.. :( That did hurt me when you continued to do it for a few days but I didn't say anything because i know you didn't mean it

You have to ask questions to know me. Don't ask me questions about what hanky panky I have done. I won't answer that. i don't kiss and tell. I told you about Aditya. I told you I have daddy issues. You figured out I have trust issues. It takes time to get to know people. And it's more fun when you get to know them as the time passes by. Fast-fast karne me koi mazaa nahi hai. I have been very fast in my life and i've realized this now and i always prefer to go slow.

I want to get to know you too. You conceal so much behind this fluffy (hehehe) exterior. But it takes time.

You are not the distraction. Dude. I have many distractions. Do you think you are the only person in the office I flirt with? Think again! Yeah, it's true that you are the only person I actually enjoy flirting with!! ('im not buttering you up here)

Nobody can keep me away from BB. BB and I... We have the strangest chemistry. We wouldn't talk to each other for months (which felt like years) and we'd gravitate back to each other. It's just how it is. Nobody can stop what's happening between me and him. and you're not a distraction. I don't use humans anymore. not that person anymore.

This is true "you have too much stored in yourself ...... and you dont have the channel to release it all" But you aren't my agony uncle or punching bag. I have just been awfully mad at you, once !! Just once!!.

You are just completely different for me. You hold the weirdest place in my life. Never anticipated to go this far. I didn't know you'd give me your number and i would chat with you like its the end of the world!!

And you are currently occupying lot of my mental space..... whether is sleeping or awake .... --> i don't want to ruin the moment, but i do do this to alot of people. What you said in another email that i have made your boring life here in OIA, interesting and now you look forward to it. There was this intern (also Adi, he's a southernese) he too said the same thing. He wasn't somebody who would talk a lot but with me, we would talk for 9 hours straight for 2-3 weeks! He didnt have any work and nor did I. and he still cannot believe it. Yeah, so i do have an effect on people. (I won't say i dont enjoy it. i jsut hope it turns out to be a good experience for them)

If you thought about me when you saw the rainbow, then i think of you everytime i see XUV on the street. I wait for you to text me on whatsapp. I come to work and I check my email first for any email from you.

Today when i came to work, i really thought that you're lying n u have come back n you'll come to work today.

" it will be difficult but i can stop" --> really? it'll be difficult???

What's the first thing you check out in a girl? and what's the first thing u checked out in me?

"ohhhh last thing ..... you are B E A U TI FUL ....enjoy have a nice day ." --> i have to hug you for this. There's a way of saying things. it also matters who is saying to you.

I'm too disturbed after wat NL said yesterday. I jsut want to go to him anymore.. i'm not Veena or Marina. Nor do I behave that way (although i did speak things with you, i hit on you, that's different. but really, i didn't do it with NL)

"ohhhh last thing ..... you are B E A U TI FUL ....enjoy have a nice day ." --> you made my day. (you too have an effect on me, okay. you just don't realize it, although I say it out loud so many times) this made me smile shyly. main sharmati nahi hu.. thank you :*