Sometimes I think about how Adrien, throughout the series, constantly grapples with his fear of abandonment. Gabriel conditioned him to believe that any love he receives is purely transactional, and that to earn affection he has to prove his utility. Adrien is constantly trying to prove his worth to his father for scraps of affection, and Chat Noir infamously crumbles on-screen any time he feels as though he is replaceable to Ladybug. It's a constant insecurity of his, like everyone will just dump him like a sack of potatoes the moment they find out how useless he is.

Meanwhile, all Marinette wants to is ensure that Adrien is happy. Because she loves him. She doesn't give two shits about how """useful""" he is. She holds him and tells him that she will never abandon him (both as Ladynoir and as Adrienette), and her fantasies are about saving him, not about him being "useful" to her. Throughout their relationship, Adrien is forced to disappoint Marinette constantly for reasons outside of his control (amok commands), and yet Marinette is still there for him.

At Adrien's lowest point, when he is forcibly torn away from everyone who had ever showed him genuine care, locked away in an all-white room and at his most "useless", right after disappointing Marinette and unable to even join the final battle or contribute in any way, she still saves him. She still loves him. Because he doesn't have to prove anything to her. Because he is loved and cherished for who he is, not for what he does, and that love is not conditional. Adrien's "happy ending" at the end of the first arc wasn't about him finally proving how useful he can be, because he never actually cared about being useful — he just saw it as the only means to feel loved and needed. Instead, in the end, he found out that he was loved and needed no matter what.

when it comes to like directly f/o or f/o related tattoos i pretty much only want 4?

theres serana that im getting, i also want the ram skull that rebecca has (but like not on my ribs bc ouchie and also its so fucking big and would pretty much just be all blackwork. but i have other plans for it). then i want like a harley quinn themed queen of diamonds playing card above my ankle (so when i put my socks on it looks like the card is in my sock like i was cheating with it) and finally i want the

do you see that tiny flower on the right?

well i want that flower on my hand

5 individuals have arrived

@stealthfeline ; @acaringautobot ; @solisanima ; @13urningstars ; @sparkmender

"Ahh, that's quiet a lot of people, huh.

I got some free time, why don't you tell me more about yourself?"

I’m such a BAD multimuse haver bc whenever someone’s like “pls specify muse!” I’m just UH YKNOW IT’S WHATEVER YOU WANT I DON’T MIND AT ALL - genuinely bc I don’t mind!! I’m good with anything!! i just wanna write with you!!

been listening to running up that hill because its the only song that comes up on my recommended atm and thinking a lot about how many otomes deal with the overall arc of: love prevails above all ( in the best endings, at least ). otomes arent the best to handle it, but truthfully there is something beautiful in the way of two people helping each other grow despite their flaws and whatever their lives continue to throw at the both of them, but at the same time have this ability to take steps back when needbe and allow each other to grow as their own people. 

when i describe wishing to write complicated dynamics, this is the sort of thing i mean. theres something so beautiful in a dynamic of two characters who want to do their best to help each other, or try to help each other in their own ways despite how good or how bad those actions will be in the meantime ---- they just wish to be that support, that one last push for one another. no relationships going to be all smooth sailing, and it’s the times where things are tense, where people doubt the other, the ugly that comes after the honeymoon period that surely enraptures something of a beautiful dynamic when used right. 

I'm thinking of changing Riku's label to bisexual

they should invent an abandonment that you cant see coming. they should invent an abandonment that you dont have to prepare yourself for for months or maybe even years. they should invent an abandonment thats quick and easy - like ripping a bandaid off!

Emergency request!!. Hi hope im doing this right but i would love some comforting douma if thats possible i dont really have presice ideas. Lately im feeling like i dont enjoy anything anymore even the things i love. There are so many changes with the people that surrounds me and i dont feel mattered or that i belong anymore or that people care. Im used/like to be alone but sometime its just painful idk why. Anyway i had to get these out thank you for indulging in my request and have a good day/night

Origami - Douma x gn!Reader

Synopsis: seeing his partner's sadness, Douma makes a swift decision to lift their spirits A/N: I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way, dear Nonnie. Remember though that it's completely okay to have moments of doubt and uncertainty, especially when facing changes of any kind. Remember, your feelings are valid, and you are never alone in this. You do matter, and there are people who care about you deeply. If you ever need someone to talk to or just a listening ear, I'm here for you

MASTERLIST

In the tranquil garden of Douma's temple, a gentle breeze rustled the leaves of sakuras trees. Amidst the fragrant blooms and lush greenery, Douma's keen eyes caught a glimpse of his significant other, sitting huddled with their knees drawn up, tears glistening on their cheeks in a dim light cast by the moon. Concern etched his features as he approached. "Hey," he murmured softly, his voice a calming melody that seemed to dissipate the heaviness in the air. He lowered himself beside them, his movements deliberate yet unhurried. "Mind if I join you?"

They glanced up, their eyes weary but warm at the sight of him. "Of course, Douma-sama," they replied, their voice carrying a hint of vulnerability that tugged at his heart.

Resting beside them, Douma let the silence linger, understanding the need for a moment of solace. The gentle sounds of nature enveloped them, creating a cocoon of comfort that allowed their thoughts to unravel at their own pace. He watched as they wiped away their tears, their emotions painted across their features.

"You seem… distant," he ventured, his tone gentle yet inquisitive. "Is there something on your mind?"

Their gaze dropped to their hands, fingers fidgeting slightly as they struggled to put their feelings into words. "Lately, everything just feels… different," they admitted, their voice soft as if sharing a long-held secret. "Even the things I used to enjoy, they don't bring me the same happiness anymore."

Douma nodded understandingly, his rainbow coloured eyes filled with a mix of empathy and concern. "Change can be unsettling, especially when it feels like it's altering the things we hold dear," he mused, his words a soothing balm that seemed to resonate with their own feelings. "Trust me, I know this feeling damn too well."

A fleeting silence passed between them, each lost in their thoughts, until Douma gently reached out to take their hand in his. The touch was grounding, a tangible reminder that they were not alone in their struggles. "You know, it's okay to feel this way," he reassured them, his thumb brushing lightly over their knuckles. "Your emotions are valid, and I'm here for you, no matter what."

Their lips curled into a faint smile, gratitude shining in their eyes. "I know you are, Douma. It's just… sometimes it's hard to believe that I matter, that I belong."

His grip on their hand tightened ever so slightly, his gaze unwavering as he met their gaze. "You matter more than you realize," he said earnestly, his voice carrying a weight of sincerity that resonated deep within them. "To me, to the people who care about you, and even to the world surrounding you." With a tender gesture, he brushed a strand of hair from their face, his touch gentle yet reassuring. "You belong right here, in this moment," he assured, his words a promise that hung in the air like a whispered prayer.

They leaned into his touch, their heartache beginning to ebb away, replaced by a sense of comfort they hadn't felt in a while. In that tranquil garden, amidst the blossoming flowers and the soft rustling of leaves, Douma's embrace felt like a sanctuary, a reminder that even amidst change and uncertainty, their significance remained unwavering.

As the tears dried on their cheeks, they found solace in the quiet moments shared with Douma, their bond growing stronger with each word spoken and each touch exchanged.

"You know," Douma began suddenly, his tone gentle yet filled with a hint of mischief, "I've noticed that when the human mind is preoccupied with something engaging, it tends to forget about the troubles that weigh it down."

Curiosity flickered in his partner's eyes, a faint spark of intrigue amidst the cloud of their emotions. "What do you have in mind?" they asked, their voice lingering with curiosity.

Douma's lips curled into a subtle smirk, a playful glint dancing in his gaze. "How about we try our hand at origami?" he suggested. "It's a calming activity that requires focus and creativity. Plus, the sense of accomplishment when you create something beautiful with your own hands can be quite uplifting. I have always wanted to try it out but ever since I'm a demon, I tend to be occupied with more ghoulish stuff," he joked.

"Origami, huh?" they mused, a hint of interest coloring their words. "I've never really tried it before too."

Douma chuckled softly, his smile genuine and encouraging. "Perfect. Then it's a new experience waiting for both of us," he replied. "Come, let's sit down and give it a shot!"

alrighty so after some reflection and getting some outside stuff prioritized Im done some blog housework so I can get comfortable here again.

im still gonna continue my hiatus until november cause the rest of October still has a lot of rl appointments and stuff going on. ill be nuking my ask and drafts to get into maximum turtle plot overdrive and just start things clean, but here's the skinny under cut:

. Ive went and cleaned up my followers list. mostly of inactive blogs, non-mutual or blogs that haven't reached out or interacted at all. I use to think I liked a busier dash but I think trying to keep up with it had been giving me anxiety even if my muses weren't involved in anything plot wise. FOMO has been really killing my vibe more then anything and I need to cut that habit out.

you're a-okay to refollow though! I'll do the same. none of this was done out of malice or a personal dislike, and I get being so busy w/ life and personal plots that you cant interact with everyone in a convenient moment. but if you see this as an opportunity to reach out then by all means! that and I might've accidentally unfollowed one or two of you cause side-blog deal, clumbsy thumbs, and uuh, dont mind me realizing that later down the line-my bad!

. unless carefully plotted otherwise, anything outside my own canons, affiliated blogs/mains or plots is no longer canon to my own. any interaction or thread initiated towards my muses will default fall into my lore/verse unless vice versa or its plotted and etc etc. It's no longer just hanging there in the void so to speak. I need to feel more in control of my own narrative I think and trying to puzzle a lot of contradicting outside plots, dash events, etc has been mentally taxing when rp shouldn't be occupying so much space or anxiety to begin with lol.

this isn't to say everything thats happening in the dash or w/ other characters isn't important ofc! and I still want to participate; it'll just fall under a crack/non-canon tag. if things end up lining up p' well with whats going on here then I might take it into canon. This is p' much what I've been doing to begin with, it's just more concrete now and Im being more careful of what Im willing to accept now. Im ofc open to discussing stuff! DMs and disco for those who have it are open always even if I take a moment to get to it!

. Im no longer answering anon asks that are personal in some way, ie, around subject matters that aren't general headcanons asks or 'hey how do you feel about-' sorta deal. I dont feel comfortable taking it to public and while I understand having the fear of being identified, it's not fair if I'm the only one bearing the subject so to speak. If you want to talk to me through DMs you can either tell me your UN (no burners either) so I can bypass permissions here to chat or you can reach me at @shiny-miltank where my IMs are not barred to mutuals only. I don't bite really! and my discord is not public. tbh Im still very anxious about being on disco to begin w/ cause social anxiety flare ups. idk tumblr dms always seemed easier to chat until I know you on a personal basis-its just worked that way.

. making it more strict that you dont? put my geeta in place of plots, events, etc that I havent participated or plotted with, nor can you make assumptions for them based on said events. as slapped on every piece on my about/rules/pinned/etc shes heavily canon-divergent to begin with so no one knows her intentions/actions (save for me ofc) and wont act in what presumed canon-geeta would do or your own version so to speak. easy enough to slap me an IM for "is it okay to-", plotting, or just make a nebulous npc stand-in.

. things that havent changed are the use of my lore and headcanons into your own! I love seeing it integrated or adapted into other lore and seeing just how much it inspires and changes over time!

this all seems rigid but really it's just reiterating whats already in my rules and no one here has been a huge offender at all :' ) this is more for me to follow and I cant thank everyone enough for their patience and creativity for as long as I've been here. Im loosey goosey and go with the flow 90 out of 100 times.

this goes for the rest of my muses, which Ill probably clean up when Im back-but yeah! miss ya'll! hope you've been doin' good! the terrapagos plot will continue then and Ill resume reaching out and leaving details! hopefully in time for dlc ; >

(rant about linguistics, aphasia and q!quackity’s impairments post-memory loss!!! to anyone who knows more about any of this, PLEASE add on or dm me id love to learn if anyones into neurolinguistics or anything of the sort)

ive been digging deeper into q!quackity’s condition (because I quite literally CAN’T stop thinking abou it) + taking note of his symptoms/behavior and it seems like what he’s dealing with could be called alexia (acquired inability to read) with agraphia (acquired inability to write), which are types of general aphasia, except i still need to know MORE about his production and comprehension i need to get in there!!!!!

it seems like he could be experiencing literal/verbal alexia with agraphia, which would mean he can’t recognize written letters or symbols at all and that is why he’s unable to read (this is all very tentative… all i have to go off of is my psycholinguistics class and as many academic articles as i can read). from what ive seen, q!q hasn’t actually tried to read any signs out loud, there’s no verbal attempt or production of speech which would make sense if he really can’t recognize the alphabet. BUT. what bothers me is that he can speak spanish with no issues. since spanish has a high proximity between phonology and orthography, theory says people who are able to speak it should be able to read and write the phonemes. and he can’t — or hasn’t tried. THAT makes me think he Can recognize the letters themselves

to confirm this i would really like to see him try to spell…. Or just name a letter! if its confirmed he CAN recognize individual letters, then id say what we’re looking at is more like pure alexia (without agraphia) — only a reading impairment, which would cause him to be unable to Arrange the letters in a sensical order. Its tough to check any of this w minecraft as a medium…. with a keyboard (or, in rp, on a communicator/in chat) it’s kind of impossible to know if he’s clicking at random or actually Trying to seek specific letters. but ill say that the way he sometimes dictates what he’s intending to write makes me think he DOES have the visual of each letter in his mind, and just struggles to order them or accurately transpose them

its also interesting to me how theres no sign of a speech impediment. q!q could speak fine from the very first moment we saw him. all hesitation was modal/owed to circumstance and not actually tied to his production of speech. i think that has more to do with the memory part of things! it could be that the extend of his memory alteration only goes as far as his writing and reading do. speech and comprehension come first in regular human development, and those are the faculties he has kept mostly unaltered. there could also be an argument to make about this pointing spanish as his first language (like cc!quackity) and english as his second, which would explain the dissonance between his production in one language and the other — but given that last stream he did express knowledge of english, idk if its relevant

i dont know much about the actual anatomy of things but i think it’s interesting that most aphasia cases are caused by lesions on the left temporal-parietal lobe. AND that its also possible for aphasia to be caused by head trauma like a hard hit to the head or deprival of oxygen (due to drowning? food for thought).

psa i know the situation in canon could be a lot less deep than im trying to make it. i get that. i dont expect the writers team to have researched the symptoms to this extent, but i enjoy discussing it. this is part of my major and a big area of interest for me so i find it really fun :) ill keep reading on this topic as much as i can and reblog w more of my musings if i find more relevant info. baseline qsmp team please let me in i need to study q!q under a microscope (lovingly)

intro

!! plz dont send me chain asks !!

(pronouns page is linked on there but also here if you dont wanna look for it:)

ok so uhh basically the gist of it

hi

im preston

uhh for names call me preston or pres or squid or orion or jaxon or actually just whatever you want i dont mind (more on my prounouns page) (if we're friends/moots feel free to gimme a nickname if ya want)

pronouns are it/he/they (the order of preference changes from time to time also neos are alright just anything other than she/her)

fandoms im most active in: varian and the seven kingdoms/tangled the series, camp here and there (will wood too!!), adamandi, the art of pleasing princes, starkid, spies are forever and percy jackson (mostly the musical bc im in a production of it :)

you can always interact with me! apparently im intimidating but i swear im really nice (i think) and id be really happy if you sent an ask at any time :3 i promise i wont get annoyed even if you think youre being annoying i just really like interacting with cool people :3

you can tag me in anything and everything! i promise ill look at it :3 and i try my best to do tag games and stuff (lmk if you dont want me to tag ya) but if i dont uhh, just assume i was like, really tired that day, or ive been tagged by another moot in that game before and im too lazy to dig it up :P sry

uhh im a minor too so like nsfw/18+ blogs dni

i try my best to use tone tags but if i forget and you need them please let me know!! (i also find tone tags helpful for myself) :3

theres more info on my card about like other stuff too

tag key:

#marble musings = original posts

#marble monologues = long posts/reblogs usually about chnt or just like existentialism idk

#marble draws = art/fanart/crafts/cosplay type thing

#marble games = i make games on google forms! hoping to learn to code or get an actual game engine to make full games past like choose your own adventures

#marble music = song covers :3 (yes i have all the filtered instrumentals i used for adamandi, lmk if you want them i can send em over discord or something)

#marble asks = answering stuff in my ask box

i think thats all of them :3 might add more eventually, and sometimes i forget to tag properly so sorry about that :(

i have some sideblogs if you wanna check em out (not super active on them but ill still try to respond if you shoot me an ask)

vent/writing sideblog: @lonelyinkcap (you can interact with my vents i dont really care. i mean. if im talkin about someone please dont fucking go like "but have you considered that theyre going through something" because uhh yes i have and also fuck you stop making my panic attacks worse :P) (if you know me irl. um. you can do whatever ig. i mean i cant exactly stop you. but proceed with caution. some of them might be vagueposts about you. im not gonna fuckin tell ya tho. also if you see anything concerning there. um. no ya dont. and definitely dont bring any of it up in conversation irl.)

hatchetfield rp sideblogs: @thelilcloverpatch @fading-angelic-starlight @marble-man @honey-sparrow @ivy-wreathed-arches and @hatchetfield-bone-thief (not sure why that one isnt properly linking but i swear its there you can search if you want)

i think i realized that ultimately my issue with how bdsm kinda is irl vs how it is on ofmd (that i prefer) is that its the same as my issues with like, the idea of someone describing anything as just a checklist of the dictionary definition of that thing. like i do understand for safety reasons why certain things have to be so rigid and coded but also i find it very bizarre and alienating how its like “ok we’re In A Scene now” ok “im playing this role now” or like oh this sentence and interaction is in the roleplay but wait no this ones not idk like i know for some other autistic people this kind of structure is more freeing bc its more clear cut, but to me it feels like a pantomime in the same way filling regular social roles is and i just dont vibe with it, and i also am not personally interested in doing specific kinks that would require more elaborate specific “scenes” (and im not saying no one should, this is all just a personal musing) vs like, i think things that are incidental in a relationship and not necessarily Explicit explicit (like telling someone to tell you what to do, and “learn to sound mean”) like its not about whats actually being said and done its about the subtext and what layers that adds to a relationship? like it almost feels more.. Earned than like. just doing what someone else says because theyre your ~master or owner now or whatever. i guess what the heart of the matter is is that i like things that feel more organic in general. i dont like things that feel forced or set up. same reason why i dont usually like the idea of meet ups or dating apps irl. its just not how my mind vibes w things

and again this is just a personal musing after spending a couple years living intensely closely with people whose entire lives revolve around bdsm, and how seeing something that resonates more with me has made me reflect on it, and not a statement on how things should be, or whats “right” and “wrong”

You’re very very right about the lack of diversity in character design, esp thinking about it in regards to CR3. Like Laudna is clearly meant to be a lot more willowy and uncanny looking than she’s shown in the character art. & the many many issues w/ Ashton’s design aside [I just,,Don’t like his design much. There was potential buts it’s just. Eh., it’s weak], it makes like zero sense for him to look the way he does being a barbarian!! Not that he has to be huge & all by any means, but he does not read barbarian aside from his big ol hammer :p

(trigger warning for talking about weight and body size/type in regards to character designs. also disclaimer that this is just talking about designs for fun, its /lh and just my musings)

i honestly quite like laudna's design overall, i think its hard to tell though, how thin she is, since she's very covered up. i actually really love her face and how her teeth dont quite fit in her mouth, which is something common with very underweight people, and i like her big dark eyes. ... i find her hard to draw quite right tho. and i think (no offense /g) in the fandom is really where people smooth her out, take away any wrinkle, and just make her kind of pretty and soft... like, no, i want her skin to be translucent. show me the veins in her eyelids!!!!

yea. . ashton's design is rly not my favourite. i redesigned him, which, i no longer rly like that drawing, mostly because of how i drew their hair. recently i've been trying to figure out how to draw the crystals even tho the idea makes my skin crawl a little lol. the main problem i have with their design is the colours - their clothes are similar values, a dark grey and a Bright red, and it just clashes with the purple and specific green of their skin .. in this last drawing of ashton i posted i think it's sorta better while still keeping the same colours, so theres that - also i think darker colours fits his character more, down in the shadowy alleys and bars of jrusar. also yea, not a fan of how totally shredded and sinewy he is, he needs to hydrate lol

my least favourite of the cr3 designs is between them and imogen though..i redesigned imogen recently and that was so much fun. i just think , her canon design doesn't suit her at all.. it's just a bit nothing-y, like a generic tomb-raiding (yikes) video game protagonist. and i think a hat suits her super well, since as well as mind-reading she has migraines and prefers to go unseen, so, she shades herself from the sun and staring with the hat.. also i just covered her up more so she wouldn't get sunburnt kajndks, its all light materials.. im just worried about her skin. also thought something a little more,, idk androgynous (??) practical (??) might be cool. like, she's got her waist-coast and her hat and bandana round her neck.. so turned her from sexy tomb-raider halloween costume to a cowboy, like her backstory is clearly inspired by :-] !! idk thats a ramble, i should catch up on cr3 i love imogen v much she has so much autism swag and she's so cool 2 me

I just wanna know why people wont fucking fight for queer folks the way I see them fighting for other causes. Like dont tell me this is all in my head I go to protests for all of these causes, and there's a marked difference in energy between queerness and the rest. Partly because I see a lot less "allies" willing to march for us (they are there and bless those of you who show up) but that could just be because I'm an ally in most of the other movements but not one in the queer movement so, maybe its just perception there. But I think also a lot of people are afraid they'll be viewed as queer, where thats not a problem in other movements. Like nobodys gonna think me, a white person, is secretly black because I march with them; I am no rachel dolazel lol. But if you march with queers theres a mentality that you must be one of them. And we kinda perpetuate that ourselves, saying we know so many people who started out as "allies" who eventually came out, so maybe its our fault. Idk. I'm just on three different mind altering substances right now and should probably not be musing about politics right now. Im sorry

describe your dream man

Huge penis

tall

facially he has to look sexy. Idk how to describe but you know what a sexual man looks like vs a normal man. Their eyebrows are naturally tilted. They look like horny sharks kind of. Good bone structure. Like one of the hot killers from criminal minds.

smart but at stuff i know nothing about. Not politics and art and shit. Like smart in a kinesthetic/social way. Not in a nerdy intellectual way.

likes to invade my personal space and pick me up and pull me onto his lap or whateverrr

doesnt care about stupid Homosocial shit like impressing his bros too much. Or climbing the social ladder. I want a man that just wants to live in a cardboard box

He has to WANT to take care of me. I dont just want to be taken care of in a transactional score keeping way. I like to completely worship my partner because thats how i am. I do it for me. I dont mean financially support me rly at all but i mean in a cheerleader way.

he has to laugh at my jokes and think im so cute and silly and adorkable and quirked up

hold me when we watch scary movies. Bonus points if he watches the movies by himself before hand so he can cover my eyes at jumpscares

goes urban exploring and shit with me. Ghost hunting.

a wife but a manly man

High sex drive and no hang ups about sex

i want someone who sees me as a damsel in distress. Nobody else does i get treated like im The fat guy from full metal jacket or some shit by everyone else. I want him to make me feel like a GIRL A WOMAN I want someone who for once in their life sees me as a GIRL as a PRINCESS!!!!!! I AM TINKERBELL!!!! IM YOUR HARLOT STARLOT QUEEN OF CONEY ISLAND!!!

i want him to be my muse

But tbh i also want to be Besties. I dont just want to feel like oo hes my boyfriend hes a man im a woman. I want to be patroclus and achilles

he has to be really supportive of my interests. That is MAJOR KEY. Name my stuffed animals. Learn the different sanrio characters names for me.

above all else. I want him to be possessive of me. Not in a toxic jealous “i own you” way. But i want him to make me feel like hes actively choosing me. Every single day. That he would carry me around in his pocket if he could. I dont ever want to feel like hes with me just to be in a relationship and Have A Girlfriend.

Thank uou for letting me talk about my favorite thing ever

110% everyone’s headcanons and fanon is correct and right and valid so this is not me trying to “correct” anyone and is more just me musing/venting than anything so please read with that in mind okay anyways

i think i realize the reason nonbinary!six headcanons dont really feel good to me and its because six is everything a little girl isn’t supposed to be, especially in horror, she’s not feminine she’s not self sacrificing shes not nice or a healer shes hungry and feral and covered in blood and will do whatever she has to do to survive, she is ruthless and kind and she’s the goddamn protagonist

and i know most people who headcanon six as nonbinary ARE nonbinary, and that we’re all desperate for anything that isn’t the patriarchal standard, starving for anything interesting and so we all reach for it and take it for our own, which we should never ever stop doing that’s what fandom is FOR that’s what everything is for

idk i guess what im saying is i think there’s something to be said for taking a moment to look at the games with six as a girl, even if your personal six isn’t, and see what that tells us about ourselves, about the story, and to sit with the tendency to HC six as nonbinary and see what that says too