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#idk i’m trying to word what i’m thinking but i don’t think it’s working
whatudottu · 6 months
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The funny thing about a TFP Humanformers AU is that if you’re changing the bots to humans, that leave the question of if the humans are bots or the humans are not, because if the Autobot Decepticon faction division still exists and the war is ongoing you’d kinda just… be left with random robot children that got involved somehow.
I mean, cybertronian Fowler makes sense given he’s a military man and primary human liaison for the Autobots already, flipping him around potentially means that he’s a military ranked bot hiding on Earth under the protection of the Autobots. The cybertronian version of MECH too makes sense as the ‘Decepticons’ of this switched universe, probably being Shockwave wannabes and dissecting human cadavers or vivisecting live subjects in the pursuit of alien interests; stereotypical alien behaviour according to Earth media. Heck, robo Fowler and mecha Silas can have PERSONAL beef or at least a history of knowing each other to the point that the Autobots are warned of a more insidious alien curiousity.
But the kids being on Earth is like… harder? Aside from explaining why they’re on a completely different planet (if it even IS based on Earth) you also gotta consider the gimmick that these kids get themselves into danger mostly thanks to the headstrong enthusiast and overeager Miko dragging the others along, and idk about you but if I saw a giant robot kid come across a fresh battlefield and say anything remotely positive about it, I’d probably just give up and turn the other direction.
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codgod · 1 month
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i still feel like the money from the egg figures is gonna go to the eggmins, including lumi and shade and anyone else that has left/been fired [maybe with the exception of like, flippa and tilín’s original admins since they were only there for less than a month but who knows]
like i agree that the way quackity is going about things sucks, with his mindset being that because he doesn’t want to make promises he can’t keep he won’t say anything at all, but i don’t think it means the eggmins won’t be paid. i’d assume, based on what he’s said, that he’s waiting to see how much money the merch makes before he promises anyone any amount of money. which again. is dumb, because if that is the case he could still just Say That. but i don’t think it’s a baseless assumption at the very least
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puppyeared · 9 months
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footnotes arent enough I need you to talk to me like im fucking Amelia Bedelia
#this isn’t about anything in particular btw. I just have to add a lot of memos when I’m doing things because some things are done a certain#way and it isn’t explained well in the instructions. like my mom has instructions on her baking recipes right#but when it says stuff like add dry ingredients to wet ingredients it also means you don’t dump it in one go you add it slowly by portion#this is probably why I find videos and demonstrations the most helpful when I learn something. like I almost always ask someone to show me#how they do it because there could be something they do that’s already second nature and wouldn’t really be considered in an explanation yk#I don’t think I’m an exception either. when the rice is done cooking I divide it into 4 quarters to bless it#but there are a million ways to divide rice and it makes me think that one persons way of doing it or not doing it all is just as valid#theres also technically no wrong way to divide rice afaik. this means either all ways of dividing rice is safe or valid until we find some#universally terrible way of dividing rice. until that happens nobody really thinks about specifying HOW you divide the rice#source: I have anxiety starting and doing things for the first time because I got way too many people yell at me NONONO WHAT ARE YOU DOING#THATS WRONG while I’m in the middle of doing the thing. I would rather have people think I’m either very stupid or overly specific#than go thru the panic inducing fear of ‘YOURE DOING THIS WRONG OMG WHY DIDNT YOU ASK AHEAD OF TIME THIS WILL BE FUCKED UP FOREVER’ 🧍#nothing wrong if you don’t give something a second thought because you’re so used to it. but I can and will ask about it and I don’t think I#really should feel bad about it if I don’t know enough to dispute it. idk#the other way around I try to be as specific as possible and word things in a way that people who might not get where I’m coming from will#understand. but the problem with that is my explanations tend to be lengthy and I lose them either way 🗿#Im. trying to work on that using examples and stuff because they seem to work the best#but if I could write everything down on a word doc and beam it into your melon that would save both of us time and embarassment#im rambling the short version is I have adhd#yapping
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a dream only life can restore
The thing about guilt was that it was all consuming—it never went away.
It lurked underneath his skin, was injected into his bloodstream, rooted deep into his heart, prepared to consume it at any moment.
Yuuji harbored a lot of guilt—from small, embarrassing things he did as a child to his grandfather’s death, guilt was like a ghost that watched over him. An old friend.
Foolishly, or naively, he believed that guilt wouldn’t be too abundant as a sorcerer—he was saving people, after all.
[or: yuuji feels guilty for pretending to be dead and he, megumi, and nobara are a family
☾3,100 words | itafushi + nobara☀︎
a late entry for @itadoriweek22 2​ day six: guilt
big shoutout to @beachytablecloth​ for beta-reading for me! you were a huge help <3 
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bo0zey · 1 year
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manic mixed depressive episode on my bday is so fun especially when ur going on 2 days no sleep n have a 12hr shift starting at the asscrack of dawn in 6hrs
#idk if i want to sleep like i do but i don’t i just keep walking in circles n staring off blankly#also bursted into tears for no reason bc i missed my mom and remembered how much i hate my fucking birthday#was in the middle of a borderline argument w my family then just zoned out n glanced at the time and tears welled#6:13???#then i pretended to go to the bathroom to hide my tears from my dad cuz he would’ve yelled at me if i went to my room w/o saying anything#so there i am crying like a pathetic loser on the toilet trying to suppress n swallow down ugly sobs#and there i am crying in my dumpster fire of a room on the floor#i literally go the entire year without crying abt her but every time december hits i always get into this weird funk#and idk why it’s still happening it’s been 7 years#i think my subconscious mind is influencing my body to release the trauma stored inside it bc i was never allowed to grieve her properly#so now in blips of time leading up to my birthday and the next day of her passing i’m 15 turning 16 again#i wish i didn’t have to work tomorrow so i could go visit her at her grave instead like i never go to the cemetery but i really want to#i guess i can go on her actual death day but i don’t want to go with my dad and brothers i just want to be alone#they don’t understand the feeling of losing your mom and best friend on your 16th bday#they don’t understand what it’s like carrying all this guilt and trauma and holding her hand and feeling her hand go limp at my words#i told her it was okay she could let go i would take care of my brothers and protect them from my father and i would be strong for everyone#meanwhile i’m listening to my dad n my aunt throwing all her clothes in trash bags upstairs#i didn’t even get to pick out what clothes i wanted to keep of hers im so angry my dad refused to let any of us miss her#“i miss mom-‘ ‘she’s dead get over it!’#i got over it alright but then this time of year rolls around and i’m under it all again#i miss her so much i wonder if she’d be proud of me i wonder what it would be like to feel her hand in mine again#ooos im crying again lol#im so pathetic i’m literally 23 in less than 30 minutes why am i behaving like a crybaby child#23:33 when i was typing that btw n 333 is my angel/life path number lol#i wanna saw my arm off but i won’t#i debated staring an iv on myself instead but i’m too drained i just want lay down n cry lol#pathetic loser crybaby girl can’t function can’t shut up making everyone uncomfortable with her sadnes n tears stupid stupid stupid#drown in them and die nobody here loves you anymore nobody cares you’re the problem always the problem#i can’t remember if my mom loved me or not everyone says she did but i forgot what it feels like#i wish i never told her it was okay to let go i lied to her i said i’d be okay but here i am manic depressive
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latinokaeya-moving · 2 years
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i don’t actually know anything lore wise abt sara genshin impact bc the game clearly isn’t interested in doing her well either but is the fact that she’s like literally a full blooded tengu trying to navigate a mortal human society that is shown to have prejudices/biases abt youkai brought up like ever
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whimsyprinx · 1 year
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you ever aware that you have friends but you also feel incredibly lonely and like you don’t?
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goldensunset · 2 years
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i have to do something today other than play legends arceus for 12 hours straight again
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#it’s the middle of the semester i have work to do#tests to study for projects to work on#advisor meetings to schedule and attend…#so that i can sign up for courses next semester…#but then i want to switch my major but that’s such an ordeal idk how tough the process will be#and i can only hope i’ll actually like the major i switch into (communication)#they always say it’s ok to go to college even if you don’t know what you wanna do yet and you have plenty of time#but i’m starting to think that’s not smart and i should really get on that ASAP#but like if it takes a while to process the major switch then#see advisor meetings start tomorrow (you literally have to attend one to be able to register for courses next semester)#but switching my major means switching my advisor#so is it a bad idea to try switching advisors when we’re supposed to be meeting with them#basically will i have a wide enough window for all this#pain and suffering#once again this is just me writing out my problems and responsibilities in words so i feel more capable of handling them#peach rambles#and this isn’t even covering the whole language requirement thing and i have to take a language placement test#they literally won’t let me just sign up for the easier class they are forcing me to take a test before i can sign up for anything#but the test is a timed speaking test where i have to listen to something and respond like it’s a real conversation and record myself and#yeah this sucks i don’t wanna do it idk how hard it’ll be…
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samuraisharkie · 1 year
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Going on record to say I can’t stand scoutandcompany *bracing for impact*
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arthur-r · 1 year
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not to use tumblr for peer review but how does this thesis feel to you??
There is no ontologically binding truth of the human condition, and each culture, society, and individual develops singular morals and ideologies in response to its own external stimuli. Humans are often considered a special, separate realm of creature, but at our core we hold no essence to separate ourselves from the rest of nature, and our identity is as mutable as the society we live in. Human identity is preserved through the passing of stories down through generations, but the capitalistic culture in our world today encourages the suppression of sympathetic ideas and behavior which make up a large part of human tradition. The idea of humanity as a definitive and singular distinction from the rest of the natural world is detrimental to our understandings of ourselves and one another as citizens of the world; it is up to each individual to define themself, creating a human identity they are comfortable inhabiting and diminishing the impact of the dominant paradigm’s overblown ascendancy over nature.
#note that i am using the word thesis wholly inaccurately i just don’t remember what this part is called#we had to make a mind map using five of the texts we’ve worked with this year to answer a level three question around a motif#and i picked nature of reality. and my question is if humanity can be defined and codified as an exclusive condition of being#which is very difficult to answer!! we have spent several sessions of philosophy club trying and failing to come to a group consensus#but this covers some facets of my general beliefs using evidence (in the mind map) from stuff we’ve talked about in class#so anyway here it is. i’m going to have to make it a lot shorter but it’s like pretty okay currently shdhdf#advice is appreciated. telling me you can’t understand what i’m saying is extremely appreciated. due on friday#also if you disagree with what i’m saying let me know and tell me why and then i can figure out if i should revise my argument#but this is my conclusion based mainly on night flying woman - wallace stevens - othello - frankenstein - the iliad - beowulf#plus the hero by john m. redfield and the social construction of culture and some outside resources like the cyborg manifesto#*james#and also like. jonathan haidt? jean-paul sartre? a friend from school? my english teacher? a lot of references#and anyway my mind map is so big it is insane. but that is what the inside of my mind looks like#but anyway just. yeah. idk. feedback?? hope you all are well. i’m preoccupied with philosophy as usual#i also did my francophone célèbre project on sartre so i have been. inundated in existentialism shdhdhdf#anyway tumblr (the mobile app) hates me so i think i’ll just go ahead and post while i can. but yeah#again i’m like around if anybody needs anything and i hope you all are well!!#me. my post. mine.#arthur’s homework#delete later
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prans-micellar-water · 4 months
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Made some really good progress on my novella today!!
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neofelis----nebulosa · 9 months
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Ugh I accepted a job and I’m starting to have second thoughts
#it doesn’t pay well and it’s pretty far away from me#I can’t drive ​and my city has bad public transit so getting there and back is a hassle#just a lot of work for not much money#I won’t say exactly how much and I wanted to negotiate but I didn’t want to risk losing the offer#there’s aspects of the position that seem exciting which is what made me say yes but ugh the reality of it is starting to set in#I am going to try to learn to drive but it takes time and I’d have to take the highway so it might be a while before I’ll get to the point..#…where I’d be comfortable with it#I want to leave my parents house I hate living there it’s like I have no freedom at all but with this kind of money it’s not in the cards#I really don’t plan on staying for longer than a year it’s more of a foot in the door type thing#once I get a year of actual experience in the field I’ll be qualified for significantly higher paying positions in the field#I guess I was just hoping for more#during the interview the recruiter said she should be able to get me close to what I said was my desired pay but the offer was a lot lower#I really don’t like having to be so focused on money it’s so superficial and I don’t want to be the kind of person who only thinks about…#…money#but the fact is I will need to make decent money if I want to accomplish what I’m hoping to accomplish#idk this is all just word vomit and totally incohesive but I’m just feeling anxious about this whole transition#there’s aspects of retail I’m happy to be done with but at least I knew how to play the game with retail#and I know I’m good at it#I’m going to maybe try to make some money on the side#I’m thinking of setting up a red bubble with my photography to help bring in some additional money#or once I get used to the schedule of the new job work sometimes at my store too#I’d also like to use red bubble as like a wildlife conservation fundraiser#where like a portion of the proceeds for each photo would go to a related charity#like a photo of a tiger wild go to the organization Panthera for example#*would#but idk how to track all that#much less how to get traction on something like that
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cherryredstars · 6 months
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Not sure if I’m doing this right since I’m new to tumbler :D but hi love ur writing followed you in an instant!
I was wondering if you could write something for a very low self esteem, inexperienced reader who goes to uni so is like 21 or something and is Miguel’s neighbor. They live in this building and their other neighbor is a rude lady who complains at the slightest Noise basically. she doesn’t dare bother Miguel but is always bothering the reader since reader can’t tell her to f off. Reader is just such sweet chubby lil cinnamon roll :(
Idk if I should have been less descriptive or more TvT; ?
Anyway hope you’re doing great :D don’t forget to hydrate ♥️
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1K Prompts
Pairing: Miguel O’Hara x fem!reader
Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Age Gap, Sexual Touching (With Clothes on), Slight Fluff
Summary: He helps you, you help him.
A/N: This is perfect, don’t worry, love!!!
Word Count: 2.4K (Not Edited)
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This is most definitely going to leave you a crying wreck in your bathroom later.
Your nerves were already on high alert with finally becoming independent and moving out of the college dorms, that pesky exam and assignment you procrastinated on working on, and your job has been firing and hiring people left and right. The last thing you needed was your cranky old neighbor, (it is crazy to think that you once thought she was going to be a kind old woman who would give you cookies when she was lonely), to come banging on your door with a  list of complaints and reasons why she could get you evicted. You do not know what to do, never being in this type of situation before. Honestly, you do not even know about half the things this woman is accusing you of. 
You can only stand there, hand tightly holding the door open as you try not to cry from stress. In your head, you are counting in an effort to make sure your breaths are coming out evenly. The last thing you want is to have a panic attack and have your neighbor add the threat of a mental hospital to the list. You nod along weakly to what she says, letting out whispered apologies that only seem to make her angrier. 
“You useless teenagers and your need to ruin good things, don’t think I forgot when you tr-”
“Is there a problem here?”
His voice is deep and smooth, causing the both of you to jolt. You visibly relax when you turn your head to find Miguel standing outside his apartment door. He has just gotten back from work and running errands, his lab coat draped over his arm as he holds paper bags in his arms. His hair is slightly tousled from the autumn breeze, and a few strands of his black hair are scattered with grey. His sweater hugs his arms and torso in a way that is mouthwatering, and you quickly look away when his eyes meet yours.
Miguel is the only neighbor you really know. He had helped you the first time you moved in, hearing the way you struggled to bring some things up to your apartment. He offered to help, carrying in boxes faster than you could into your apartment. When you had gotten furniture, he was happy to come over and assemble it for you. He is so kind to you, offering to help with a leaking pipe or to answer any of your questions about how to do something. You might have grown a slight crush on your neighbor, something that slightly freaked you out when you realized because of the obvious age gap the two of you have. You have not even finished college yet and he is in his mid-thirties working in a big corporate lab. 
Miguel clears his throat and you look back at him. He stares at you expectantly, totally ignoring the stuttering woman who tries to answer his question. He is only ever interested in what you have to say. You flush under his intent gaze, quickly shaking your head. You do not want to cause more problems, and you definitely do not want to have your cranky neighbor form a bigger vendetta against you. 
Miguel’s eyebrow raises, definitely catching the anxious expression on your face. He hums dismissively after a minute, eyes lazily trailing back to the older woman. His nose scrunches up slightly at the sight of her and he looks away again as the woman stops trying to defend herself. Miguel shrugs, the paper bags rustling with their contents. He turns to face you, once again ignoring the older woman. 
“Then you wouldn’t mind helping me put away my groceries, right? Can’t get my keys with my hands full,” Miguel speaks in a lazy drawl. 
You are quick to nod your head in agreement, stepping out of your doorway and closing the door. The woman steps back, a displeased look on her face as she watches you walk over to Miguel. Miguel keeps his eyes trained on you, watching everything you do. You are shy when you smile up at him. With your back turned towards the old woman, you mouth a ‘thank you’ to him. His eyes instantly snap to your lips, intently studying your exaggerated words. His eyes seem to darken for a second before he blinks and it is gone. His eyes trail back up to your eyes and he tilts his head slightly down. 
“Keys are in my pants pocket.”
You quickly nod, whispering out an ‘okay’. Your face burns as you have to get closer to him to not knock into his arms. The angle is slightly awkward, your hands slip into his pants pocket and your face burns from having your hand so close to his…thing. As you try to find his keys, Miguel looks down at you with a heated look. He watches silently for a few minutes before looking back up and over your shoulder to the older woman. His face is masked in indifference, maintaining eye contact with her until she fidgets and turns away without saying a word. 
At the same time she walks into her own apartment, you make a sound of victory as you finally retrieve his keys. You dangle them in his face with a proud smile, and he gives you an amused smirk. He steps away from his apartment door, giving you room to step in front of him and unlock his door. As you insert the key, you feel Miguel press up against your back. His warmth seeps into your spine and you are quick to bite your tongue so you do not let out a squeal.  
His breath tickles your neck and ear, warm and slightly minty. “What did I tell you about standing up for yourself, hmm cariño?”
The question rumbles with his voice and you have to hold your breath in order to not make an embarrassing sound. You turn to look at him over your shoulder and instantly regret it. He has not moved his face yet, and you are a breath away from him. If you leaned forward the slightest bit, your noses would be touching. You gulp nervously, and Miguel’s eyes trail down to your lips once again. He lets out a deep hum as you lick them nervously. 
“I- she’s not that mean to me.” You whisper out in the older woman’s defense. You cannot help the way your lashes flutter as you try to meet his eyes. 
Miguel scoffs at your defense, finally backing away from you. He shifts his hold on the bags, freeing his hand to turn the doorknob. Your hand is still there, and your breath hitches when his large hand encompasses yours. His hand moves both yours and the doorknob, making a combined effort to open the door. You are still watching him from over your shoulder, mouth slightly opened in awe. Miguel looks down at you, something playful in his eyes as he tilts his head to the side. 
“You’re blocking the doorway, cariño. The ice cream I got you is going to melt.”
Your blush returns from the pet name and you stutter out an apology as you rush inside his apartment. It’s warm, and you’re hit with the smell of him. You find the light switch and turn on the lights, flooding the whole place with a warm glow. Miguel follows you into the kitchen, placing the paper bags on the dining room table. He rummages through them, glaring at you when you try to grab one to start helping. His hands connect with something cold, and he pulls out a personal pint of ice cream. He hands it over to you and you turn it around to see the label. Your eyes instantly light up when you read the brand and flavor. Last week you had ranted to Miguel about how the grocery store did not have your favorite ice cream in stock as he was fixing a problem with your internet. The whole time he just hummed along, you did not actually think he was listening. 
He smiles softly at you as you beam up at him. He turns back to the groceries, sighing when he sees your hand reaching for the bags again. He turns to you with a bored expression. He gently removes your hands from the bag, telling you to go eat your ice cream before it melts. You grumble playfully under your breath, complaining about how you were supposed to be helping. He chuckles as he follows after you, getting a spoon out for you. 
“I thought the whole point was that I was supposed to help you put the groceries away, not eat them.” 
Your complaining is cut off by a yelp when Miguel grabs your waist. He lifts you up, putting you on top of the counter. Your eyes are wide as you look at him and his head nuzzles into the crook of your neck. You squirm slightly from his proximity. 
“You can help me by sitting prettily and keeping me company. Tell me about your day.” 
He pulls away then, returning to the dining room table and carrying a bag to the counter next to you. Your eyes are still bashful as you watch him, quietly opening your ice cream and beginning to eat it. Miguel starts to pull contents from the bag and looks over at you expectantly. Hesitantly, you begin to go through your day, easing into it the more you talk. You speak between bites of ice cream, half paying attention to Miguel as he walks around the kitchen to place things in their proper places. Occasionally, he looks over at you as you speak, his eyes trained on the way you place the spoon in your mouth and lick at the delicious treat. 
You are almost done when he puts the last thing away. He walks over to you as you continue talking absentmindedly, just finished slipping the spoon out of your mouth again. You stop talking when Miguel’s eyes drop to your mouth, his thumb coming up the swipe at your lower lip. When he pulls it away, a bit of melted ice cream is stuck to his skin. His eyes meet yours again when he brings it to his mouth, licking it away. He hums in appreciation for the taste. 
Your mouth drops open with a gasp as you watch, eyes trained on the pink muscle. You watch as his lips form a sly smile, and you blush as you look back into his eyes. But his eyes are still trained on your parted mouth, eyes dilated and hungry. He leans forward slightly, hand returning to rub at your bottom lip before he replaces it with his lips. He is not kissing you exactly, only sucking on your lip until it is swollen and red. He gives it a small nip before he pulls away, his hands falling to rub your thighs. It causes a small whimper to escape your mouth and Miguel basks in the noise. 
His hand seeps closer and closer to the area between your thighs, grabbing the carton of ice cream and moving it to the side. His hands hastily return to the area between your thighs, fingers brushing against your center. Your breath hitches and you look down to where his hands are. Your attention is snapped away when his gravelly voice meets your ears. 
“Continue with the story, querida. You don’t sound like you finished.”
You stutter over your words, the topic of conversation blanking from your mind. Miguel chuckles knowingly, his fingers continuing to brush up and down until they land on your clothed bud. He presses into it hard enough so you can feel it through the fabric of your pants and panties, gently reminding you where you left off. You nod nervously, hands snapping up to meet his shoulders as you feel wetness rushing into your panties. You stutter and choke on your words, eyes shutting as you rotate your hips sloppily into his hand. The movement is jerky, and you feel slightly embarrassed at how painfully obvious it is that no one has ever touched you like this before. But Miguel seems to like it, likes the idea that you’re untouched and he is the only person who has seen you like this. 
It gets even better when you make those soft noises, cutting yourself off and having to be reminded about what you were saying. Miguel continues his hand movements, pressing into you and rubbing and stroking. Your wetness has seeped through your panties, dampening the material of your leggings. If you were not lost in how good it feels, you would have been grossed out and uncomfortable. A weak call of his name escapes you and Miguel looks up from your cunt to look at your face. He hums in acknowledgement, watching as you try to pull his face closer to yours in a kiss. 
He swiftly avoids it, and you would have curled into yourself at the blunt rejection if you did not become distracted by his mouth suck and licking along your neck and jaw. Your mouth falls open with a moan, head leaning back to give him more room. He groans against your skin, fingers pressing tight circles to your clit. With a few hard circles, your back arches and your hold on him tightens. Gasping moans leave you and you feel the band in you snap, releasing more wetness into your panties as you finish. Miguel pulls his head away from your neck, keeping his fingers to your bud as you ride out the orgasm. Once you slump back down, he pulls his hands away. As you catch your breath, Miguel cleans up the mess on the counter. He reaches over, closing your melted ice cream and putting the spoon in the sink. 
You are still in a daze when he pushes the warm container in your hands, his own hands gentle as he lifts you off the counter. Your eyes are glossy in after-lust as he gently guides you out of his apartment and into yours. His warm hand leaves the small of your back, massaging your sides before he whispers a thank you into your ear for your help. You are only pulled completely out of your daze when you hear your door lock and close as Miguel leaves. You turn to look at the door, cheeks blazing as you clutch tightly onto your ice cream.
You are totally getting a noise complaint for that old woman tomorrow.
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lilnasxvevo · 1 year
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I can’t believe a year ago I thought Chinese names were hard to remember (for Me Personally not like as a general universal rule). I feel so dumb now.
#granted I still do struggle sometimes with names from languages I’m unfamiliar with#like I do occasionally to this day confuse Combeferre and Courfeyrac’s names from Les Mis#i think in general it is a little easier to remember names if you either 1) know other ppl by that name or 2) know what the name means#like for me. and maybe this is just how my brain works but I don’t think it is.#if I meet someone named Matthew I’m very likely to remember their name because I’ve known a lot of people named Matthew#and I will immediately associate this new Matthew with all the other Matthews I’ve met#so when I try to remember their name and all the faces of every Matthew I’ve met pop into my brain I’m like AHA#and as for the knowing what a name means thing#idk I can’t explain how it works but it just does#like it’s easier for me to remember Sun Wukong’s name if I know that Wukong means ‘awakened to emptiness’#it’s easier for me to remember Jiang Wanyin if I know Jiang means river and Wanyin means ‘to recite at night’#and I also think it gets easier with Chinese when you get more familiar and start to realize that there aren’t that many different syllables#in pinyin#so even though two people having the same given name is really rare#you still start to recognize syllables from different peoples names and different words you know and then you have those associations#like it’s easier for me to remember the name of. idk. Jin Lan City from SVSSS if I just remember it’s like the Jin and the Lan from MDZS
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whimsyprinx · 1 year
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sometimes I come close to telling people we should stop being friends but I do think that’s the devil and the rsd talking
#whimsy whispers#I do believe I’m in the early stages of a spiral#but like how can I not be?#I mentioned in now deleted posts that most of my relationships feel strained or like they’re falling apart and idk how to fix them and#I feel like maybe people also are thinking we just shouldn’t be friends anymore#maybe I’m wasting peoples time by trying to fix friendships that aren’t like working out#I feel like I’m dialing at friendship and I feel like all aside from two or three friendships are just going to end anyways so maybe I#should just go ahead and end them anyways but they’ll only hurt me more#I wish people just hated me or would tell me that they don’t want to talk or be friends or something so I don’t have to sit here wondering#if I did something wrong/what i did wrong and trying to fix things when idk how to anymore#I want to disappear#I’m already disappearing from peoples lives so I may as well disappear entirely#it’s so funny because people like to go ‘oh you’re doing so well’ ‘you’ve grown so much from last year’ no I haven’t#I still feel like you all hate me and tnat no mattter how much I try and try and try to reach out that I’m only bothering you#reassurance means nothing especially when nothing changes#you can tell me we’re friends and you care and want to hear from me but like when there’s still radio silence afterwards those words don’t#mean much#I just want to be someone people want on their lives I keep saying it and I will keep on saying it I jsut want to feel wanted and I don’t#my best friend in the whole world doesn’t even feel like she wants me in her life at this point and I just don’t know what to do I feel like#I don’t have anyone#I feel like when people speak to me it’s conditional like they’re only talking to me because they’re a no one else at the moment#I will never be anyone’s first or second of fifth choice#it hurts so bad feeling like this and the feeling never goes away and idk if it got any better than before either
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tteokdoroki · 8 months
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✩ — ANGELS SHOULD NEVER FALL THIS FAR FROM HEAVEN ⁀➷ everyone believes satoru gojo to be an angel. your mother considers her new son to be a blessing, even if he’s bratty and spoiled. but never once did think teasing him would make your step-brother to act on such ungodly desires. (3.2K)
warnings. minors, blank and ageless blogs do not interact ! nsfw, smut, pwp, college!au, religious imagery, step-cest, groping, fingering, ‘just the tip’, exhibitionism, clothed sex, male masturbation, slight degradation, bratty behaviour, use of oneesan, unprotected sex, ruined orgasms, cumplay, fem!reader, step-bro!gojo.
things to note. lol sorry it’s been a while !! trying a new layout also posting this into the void while i work on kinktober eee !! idk i’ve had a rough time trying to write a one shot so im glad i could make this !! special thanks to @kishibye for beta reading. i hope you enjoy this bestie boos ily <3
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“what are you doing?” there’s a sharp edge to the tone of satoru’s voice, splayed across his tongue that holds back a stream of curses. his eyes speak fury in their piping hot flames of wild cerulean as he watches you enter the kitchen and shoot straight for the snack cupboard.
you can feel the weight of his gaze as it crosses the slopes of your body, from the back of your head, twirling around your curves before ultimately falling to your behind.
playing innocent, you stand on your tip toes and grasp at the bag of chips you’re after. the ones on the top shelf. “whaddya mean ‘what am i doing’?”
“what do you mean what do i mean?” your step brother retorts childishly, as if you’re two kids fighting on a playground at recess.
you click your tongue and pay him no mind. “don’t be such a baby, satoru,” you wave a hand in his face in a haughty manner. “use your big boy words.”
gojo suppresses a whine when your shirt rides up and reveals your skin to gorgeous eyes. he lets it gargle around in his throat like the sting of cool mouthwash, before striding over to you — grabbing the chips and slamming the cupboard shut so hard it makes you jump.
“you can’t just walk around dressed like that.”
he gestures to your get up — the clothes you wear when nobody’s home. your sapphire silly and scallop-edged panties, your old and ratty band t-shirt haphazardly thrown on.
“why?” you turn around to come face to face with your younger (step)brother, noting the way his stare hones in on the plush meat of your thighs as you squish them together — leaning back against the kitchen counter.
“my friends are coming over.”
“so, what’s the big deal?” there’s something about pissing gojo off that entertains you. he’s a brat by all means, raised with a silver spoon in his mouth and daddy’s dollars tucked into his pockets. whenever there’s a problem, all it takes is a classic ‘toru temper tantrum and your parents are on the scene to fix things for him. he’ll never know the hardships of being raised by a single mother, always having a little less than most. he walks around in his own little bubble of riches - and you can’t help but want to pop it. “shoko thinks i’m cool and geto will probably jack off to me later. it’s whatever.”
“but it’s not whatever,” you can practically see satoru fight the urge to stomp his foot like a petulant child — even going as far to have the audacity to pout down at you. “you’ll just embarrass me. so do us both a favour and put some clothes on, nobody wants to see all that ‘round the house.”
“do you own this house?”
“no but i-“
“but your daddy does. and daddy isn’t here! so shut up, satoru!” jabbing a finger into his chest, you smile up at your not-so-little little step-brother, evilly. “i make the rules.”
“oh fuck you. all you do is mooch off of my dad, princess. you wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for your mom whoring it out for him.” he sneers in response, upper lip curling into a distasteful snarl like a dog with a stranger on its territory. his words, though cruel and foul, are far from the truth and you know that he doesn’t mean it. satoru is a brat that throws acid laced words at anyone who gets in his way — yourself included.
even though you agree that your parents tied the knot all too fast — barely giving the two of you a chance to get to know each other as siblings. they were in love and far too happy for the rivalry between their children to get in the way. you know that the fact pissed gojo off to no end, he hated how your mother doted on him and how he’d always needed to fight for his father’s attention. now it certainly wasn’t ever going to be on him. but the two women in his house instead.
your poor, spoiled, baby brother.
however, you won’t let his words and how he projects onto you, hurt you. “whoops! looks like i dropped my will to give a fuck!” whilst pretending to drop your snack, you bend over in front of him to reveal inches of beauty marked and blemished flesh, drawing hungry seafoam eyes to the bounce of showing your ass — testing your little step brother. “i don’t care satoru, i’m older.”
satoru’s mouth snaps shut after moments of wordlessly opening and closing. he stands frozen on the spot, as if he can’t seem to process the very idea that his older step-sister had just flashed him to prove a point.
but just when you think you’ve won, the silver-haired brat is pressed right up behind you, forcing your body to bend over the cold marble counter that instantly has your nipples hardening against the icy surface. heat rushes to your face, blossoming just under the barrier of your skin as his hard on nestles it’s way between your ass cheeks — a symphony of your surprised squeaks echoing through the modern kitchen.
“hey! what the hell do you think you’re doing?”
instead of responding, he pushes your head down against the counter — circling his increasingly wet erection against your behind, manhandling the globes of flesh back onto his dick. “not so fun, is it.” he coos down at you, voice chilly and full of condescending highs and lows. “yanno…you’re awfully mean to me.”
saliva pools on your tongue, weighing it down in your mouth like a paperweight as satoru’s girth slips downwards, seedy tip brushing over panty clad and your swollen clit. “aren’t oneesan’s s’pposed to take care of their baby brothers?” his breath is hot and ragged against your ear as gojo haunches over you, caging you in like a wild animal as you thrash and writhe under his touch.
you can’t even bring yourself to feel an ounce of shame when gojo’s left hand dances between your tangled limbs and slips past the frilly band of your underwear — ghosting over the throbbing pearl laying between your sticky pussy lips. “step…step brother!” you whinge at the tingle of pleasure that blooms in your lower tummy and spreads like angel wings throughout the rest of your body. 
satoru takes turns playing with you, alternating between his nimble, skilled fingers and his seedy girth that smears precum all over your inner thighs and panties. “like that even fuckin’ matters.” he laughs, twisted and proud. “could you get off like this? yeah i think you could…. you’re already so wet. just from grinding on your little brother’s cock.”
your legs grow shaky at his ministrations, beads of your juices oozing from your empty entrance to stain the man’s sweats, slicking him up as if it’s a signature of your claim. “‘toru!” you gasp, eyes rolling back into the depth of your skull. “m-more.”
“look at how fast you fold for me…” he pushes up your shirt so that the fabric pools around your waist — pawing at the fat there, massaging your hips softly as if he isn’t violently, cruelly rubbing one out on your achey pussy. “i don’t think you’re in a position to ask me for more, big sis.” satoru taunts, a heavy hand coming down on the bare skin of your ass, leaving a raw handprint in its place. “such a nasty slut, i bet you’d let me fuck you like this too. out in the open, where anyone could catch us.”
you yelp in surprise at the feeling of gojo’s messy, cream coated cockhead nudge at your entrance from over your panties — a slender finger pulling the soaked material to the side so he can fuck you with his tip. “oh, i bet you’d like that, huh baby?” he continues to purr, jutting his hips forward ever so slightly — feeding your greedy cunt a few more inches of him. satoru’s barely sheathed inside of you, but you’re already stretching deliciously around what he’s given you. he’s fat, girthy just as he is long and his mushroom tip drags along sensitive spots in your walls you didn’t even know you had.
 he hasn’t even fucked you properly yet.
you sob, wail and writhe on your little step brother’s cock, nails clawing at the marble counter while your breath escapes you. “satoru, please fuck me. ‘m sorry… sorry—!”
“shh big sis, you’re being too loud,” he cups a hand over your mouth. gojo eases two digits past your plump lips to pacify your cries as he shallowly pumps his wet cock into the heat of your sex — gritting his teeth to hide his own moans. “we…fuck, you’re tight as shit… we wouldn’t want my friends to know that you dress like a slut for my cock, would we?”
you shake your head with a muffled moan, suckling the taste of yourself from gojo’s fingers and breathing heavily through your nose. “no, we wouldn’t. that’s right. good girl, oh shit.”
satoru laughs, a little cocky and a little drawn out in a long, whiny whimper over the wet slap of the backs of your thighs in the front of his own. but he trembles from behind you, like his legs are about to give out every time your creamy cunt sucks a little more of him in. it’s a miracle he’s managed to hold you both up.
guilt wracks your body intertwining with the red blood cells coursing through your veins and carrying limited oxygen to your brain — your head practically empty at how your little brother ruins you on half of his fat cock. this isn’t right, this is completely wrong and yet you feel yourself coming undone — weak in the knees and shaky in your lips, the dam in your lower tummy threatening to burst at any second and flood the room in an erotic river of your arousal. 
pushing your head off of the counter, you lean into satoru, throwing your ass back onto him in rhythm with the harshness of his thrusts. everything is hotter, heavier and you can’t even think about how much of a bad step-sister you are when he’s dominating your body like this. the silky locks of satoru’s silvering hair press against your shoulder and he wraps a fist in the fabric of your shirt to pull you further back onto his cock. 
“‘m gonna c-cum, oh god!” you squeal, flinching as your juices crudely slap against the kitchen floor. “i’m so close!”
he pants into your ear like a desperate dog, fully wrapping himself around you and trapping you against the counter so that you have nowhere to go except towards your high. “yeah?” gojo breathes heatedly, temperate breath cascading over the back of your neck and only adding fuel to your fire of desire. “i can tell, you get like this. all needy ‘n cute when you’re about to cum.” 
his words have you clenching around his bulbous tip every time it pushes up against the pleasure spots you didn’t even know you had — your arousal catching in the pretty blue veins that spiral around the length of gojo’s shaft. “you don’t think i can’t hear you, big sis? late at night when you think everyone’s sleepin’….” his whistle tone moans are quickly replaced by deep growls and grunts that only just manage to escape from between the gritted rows of your step brother’s pearly whites. “when you stuff those tiny fingers into that tight little hole and—“
he reaches down between your mess of slick soaked limbs to land a harsh smack against your quivering pussy, sending the foamy ring of white where your bodies join flying about the place. “—and make yourself cum to the thought of me?” he continues, breathing ragged and laughing at you again when you cry out in a mix of pain and pleasure. 
“s-satoru!”
he soothes you with quick circles over your swollen clit and kisses to your shoulder — being careful not to leave marks. “oh did that hurt, baby? am i  the mean one now?” licking a stripe up the side of your face and tasting the sweat on your glistening skin, satoru rambles on — filling you up with praises and copious amounts of precum. “you know i—fuck— you know i love you. my precious big sister, so fucking good to me. let’s make you cum, yeah?” 
you’re allowed to rut back on him for a little longer, since he loves the sound of his name whirling around messily on your tongue, all high-pitched and sugar coated for him. if only you knew how badly he’d wanted you, how pissed he was when his father went on to marry your mother. gojo has wanted you since the very first night you met — his every waking thought has been carefully carved to lust after you, think of your eyes, your smile, your lips. fuck, everything about you has satoru under some kind of spell. 
“r-right there. right there, t-there!” you chant the words like they’re the a prayer, as if they’re the only ones you know, allowing satoru to throw you through the loop of pleasure until you’re too far gone to stay on the ride. 
angling his slender hips upwards, his cockhead bares down on the gummy centre of your g-spot just has he buries himself inside of you — right up to the hilt. “h-here? this where you want me, big sis?” gojo’s amused gasp turns into a coo when you let out a meek hum of agreement, babling wild nonsense and drooling into the counter you’re pressed against. “mmhm, got you creamin’ around me already. so cute, so good when you listen. when you’re a good t’me, oneesan.” 
the honorific alone has your mouth running dry as if it’s been stuffed with cotton. though the syrupy pap, pap, pap of your sex says otherwise. it tells the truth of your sin.
and the thing that you don’t know about satoru is that he loves to give, feeding pieces of himself to you as he fucks you wild in the middle of your family kitchen. he wants you to have all of him, every corner and inch of his body just like he dreamed about. he knows it’s forbidden and that it’s wrong, but he can’t help but relish in the feeling of your pretty pussy sucking him in so selfishly, greedily clamping down on his thick base. 
he would give you anything. anything you wanted and asked for if you’d let him. his hands slip from your waist to intertwine with yours splayed out on the cool marble surface, using his last spurts of energy to drag you towards your orgasm and the deep depths of sinner’s paradise. 
“fuck me, fuck me, baby.” he growls possessively against the shell of your ear. “let go for me. lemme see how much you love your little brother—“
the crescendo of your pleasure is at an all time high, about to come crashing down on you like a tonne of heavy bricks. 
that is until the door bell rings, accompanied by the sound of geto’s voice from the outside of the house. “yoo, satoru! open up!” 
you’d think that you’d have been good enough for your little step-brother to keep going — to push onwards and let you cream all over him before he went to attend to his silly little friends. but he flips the script, pulling out of you just as you teeter over the edge to ruin your orgasm.
“no, no, please!” you sniffle, teary eyed with dissatisfaction sitting in your lower belly — the need to cum still there but the feeling of emptiness within your dripping walls taking over. “satoru…” you whine.
when you look behind you, he’s too busy finishing himself off — his black shirt between his teeth, sweats hanging low on his waist while gojo palms  his hard and heavy cock as he pleases. 
it’s coated in your arousal, shining under the artificial lighting in the kitchen and you watch with a pout as gojo jacks himself off to the view of your ruined cunt. he thumbs the seedy slit at the centre of his bright red tip, hissing through the sensitivity. he’s a picture perfect vision, appearing as an angel before your very eyes. a mop of halo white hair flop backwards with satoru’s head, rich sapphire eyes locked behind fluttering lashes that glisten with pearls of pleasure filled tears. 
you know not to be mistaken, you know that satoru is more like an incubus than the heavenly being he presents as. the parts of your brain with better judgement see him as the sinner who made you fall from grace, committing such a heinous act. the desperate side of you with a brain full of lust and smoke screens sees your step-brother as a god who controls all of your desires. 
you think you prefer that side of you more. 
meanwhile, a drop of sweat runs a track down the length of satoru’s neck, catching on the curve of his Adam’s apple as he swallows down his euphoric laments. you find yourself jealous that his own fingers are wrapped around his sloppy dick instead of drawing shapes against your aching clit. you envy how good it must feel for satoru when he finally cums. ropes of thick white sling around his knuckles, much paler in contrast to his pearlescent skin tone.
a deep, gravelly moan erupts from his hot mouth like lava, accompanied by curses and the stuttered syllables you recognise to be your name while he finishes himself off. gojo jerks his sensitive cock over your ass to paint you with the last spurts of his release. it’s a claim on you as your step-brother, a way in which he can show you that he always gets his way no matter what.
whilst still recovering, your step-brother drags a slender finger through the puddle of cum he’s left on you, and drags it down to your stretched little hole before pushing it against your overstimulated clit. “hmm, so pretty.” gojo grins, slow and sly, when you twitch and attempt to jolt away from him. then unexpectedly, he lands a hard smack against your bum — revelling in your sweet cry of pleasure, impatience and pain. “go put somethin’ on, will ya, sis? my friends are still waiting outside.” 
“i…i hate you.” you whimper shakily, brain frazzled from the situation. 
satoru might be a spoiled brat, but he’s not mean enough to leave you here a shaky, dripping mess so he helps you to your feet — tenderly fixing the hem of your shirt and panties back into place (failing to wipe his cum off of you beforehand). you’re still pouting from your ruined orgasm once he’s done, and he nudges the underside of your chin with a singular knuckle. 
“don’t worry big sis, i’ll come take care of you later. maybe i’ll even let geto watch since you love prancing around half naked for him too.” he teases, squishing your cheeks as you try to swat at him. “and you don’t hate me, you love me and this cock. clearly.” gojo sings and sends a cheeky wink in your before prancing away to open the door for his friends. 
he pulls his pants up as he goes, not minding the wet patch you’ve left on him. 
whereas, you scurry up to your room before they can greet you and gojo tells them that you’re feeling unwell. 
that day, you learn two valuable lessons: 
one —  never mess with a spoiled brat, it’ll never end well for you and gojo will always get what he wants no matter who pays the bills. 
two — geto really does like to jerk off to you, even more so when he watches his best friend punishes his older step-sister with enough orgasms to make her forget why she was in trouble with satoru in the first place.
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꒰ end. — all rights reserved © tteokdoroki 2023. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
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