#idk i just need to chill | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

in-peryl · 2 years

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in today's news: i have made myself extremely anxious bc i'm having a formal 1 on 1 meeting with my boss tomorrow for the first time since he told me to drop out 😔

#personal #to be fair hes not telling me that this time #he wants me to explain atomic layer deposition to another lab member #and then were gonna possobly outline my very 1st first author paper which is objectively a good thing #and i have an idea for a second paper #im just.......nervous #like to the point of shutting down off and on today #when i need to get my data looking presentable before 10 am #i know it will be fine #but im still just waiting to go in there and have him call me stupid and say im not doing enough #he didnt say the former in the bad meeting but he CERTAINLY said the latter #idk i just need to chill #maybe take a hot shower or scream a bit #maybe pull an all nighter so that i dont oversleep again bc this cough medicine knocks me the fuck out #weve also met informally since then if im in his office for something else or have a question or whatever but STILL

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toytulini · 10 months

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listen im ace and im pro kink at pride and whatever, but the way some of yall are wording your posts in response to the backlash against it is uh. really taking me back to the ace shitcourse era.

yall know theres nothing wrong with being a "virgin", right? that its not inherently shameful to have not had sex, to never have sex, even if youre not ace, even if you do want to have sex someday, like, its fine that you haven't had sex?

maybe if your problem is that theyre trying to police your behavior and shame you for expressing your sexuality, you can say that? instead of resorting to "haha stupid virgin gets no bitches" like my god. do you not hear how fucking regressive that attitude is? i know, i know, youre "joking".

get a better joke

#toy txt post #god im going to regret this post im gonna regret it so much i can feel it in my bones #let it flop..........pls #internalize my message let it sink in and understand what i am saying and then let the post flop #i say. knowing the ppl who need to see such a message are the ones who will make me regret this post and regrwt not having #1 million bajillion disclaimers #virgin is in quotes bc its a bullshit made up stupid purity culture concept anyway and quite frankly i hate even seeing the word #disclaimer: the previous sentence is not me saying that it is a slur for asexuals. it is me a single individual saying this specific word #grosses me out to read and see everywhere when its a stupid bullshit binary made up or at least historically largely used #to shame largely women and i dont know why we're still using it in 2023 #and ive just been. seeing such an uptick in this whole like. attitude? lately and like #im ace im minorly sex repulsed. mostly about anything sex at me bad. other adults sex at each other consensually? go wild #i like to think im pretty chill about it. i try to be. i think its fine ig to be like 'my meat is huge i fuck so much so good'#like okay not my thing but good for you. love that for you #but then some of yall have started turning it back around back to. 'haha your meat so small and shriveled you get no bitches'#'haha stupid incel virgin' like okay. didnt realize we all went back to fucking. middle school but okay #god im gonna run out of tine to get ready for my thing writing this stupid post UGH evil #but like idk we've kinda circled back to being like haha being a virgin still is stupid and silly and shameful #and if im quite honest. i do think the acecourse played a part in that bc i felt like we were making good progress in like #hey guys is fine to not have sex ever if you dont want to its fine to not want sex its fine #and then aphobes went fucking rabid on us and splintered and destroyed online communities all over but especially on tumblr #and so many aces went back in the closet we stopped talking about it we stopped spreading awareness and now this stupid goddamn like #and now this stupid bullshit attitude is back where its like funny to call someone a virgin as an insult but like no bro trust me its okay #its okay for me to do it bc im a hot queer person with huge meat instead of a cisstraight frat bro with huge meat #? like you know the issue was the behavior right? not the fact that it was straight dudes saying it? its bc the thing being said was shitty?#you know you can dunk on the puritan bitches trying to police your behavior at pride without getting us as collateral damage right #stop making me read that stupid ugly ass word ur not cool or funny #whatever #if you come on to this post to start shit i will not only block you but as many of your mutuals and followers as i can find. i will scroll #i will block this entire fucking website if i need to do not test me. i am exhausted and the acecourse ate up all my tolerance in 2015.

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gayspock · 1 year

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i love it when a tv show has lows that are so low you're so ashamed to ever show it to anyone ever but then highs that melt your brain a bit, like, "good fucking god, this is genuinely such an astounding piece of craftmanship... my perception of the medium, and perhaps of myself, has been challenged/changed in 40 minutes" but you cant even express that to ppl without feeling like youre fucking deranged bc my god the lows .....

#Egg.txt #sorry i saw gar watched Hush recently and like #my god thats such a good episode of television . like sincerely fucking solid. like damn man.#and theres other eps of buffy i'd rank among that i.e a certain s5 episode that just still gives me chills to think about #but this also goes for trek + doctor who + farscape + and any and every lame little campy show out there #that just needs to fuck your head wide open sometimes #maybe that why i have enjoyed bsg but i havent like fucking Melded with it yet because its highs and its lows are both there but it doesnt #ever touch the extremes of either #i need something so so bad and so so good at once that makes mefeel like im insane #god i might go rewatch some tos soon #but yeah ok abt bsg maybe its alsojust #laccking a sincerity to it sometimes #and not just in how its a darker/grittier #but just in general i feel like .........hm. idk..#let me ponder

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reineydraws · 5 months

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wanted: marine hunter takanome mihawk

#shanks: oh i want him alright #dracule mihawk #takanome mihawk #one piece #one piece fanart #op fanart #i accidentally went way extra on this than i intended to 💀 i got bored waiting for my brother + my phone was charging #it was just supposed to be a b&w sketch with his eyes yellow or red but it got out of hand when i was like 'maybe i'll do skin for funsies'#ah well. im really starting to get into painting with this one brush. one day i'll merge it with the style i use more #cuz rn i tend to break out the painting only when i wamt smth a liiiiittle👌 more realistic.#i stress that 'little' bc calling my style 'realistic' in any sort of way feels inaccurate lol #i digress #i love imagining marine hunter mihawk being some teenage punk between the ages of 17 and 23 #idk when he became a warlord but if he had this epithet even before roger's death that would put him in mid-to-late teens #since at roger's execution he was 19 amd already had yoru #so it's kinda funny to imagine the marines being hunted by some teenager with dramatic sideburns and an even more dramatic sword #last post of the year! :)#i had no chill this month. pls dont expect anything on my blog again till march lol.#(im half-serious; im going on vacation for all of february and i have some prior pieces i need to focus on in jan haha. we'll see tho!)

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stuckinapril · 3 months

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Something so ineffable about exhaustion that comes not from a lack of sleep but from a lack of rest

#neeed a day where I’m doing nothing but I don’t think that’s forthcoming #I was out all day + forced myself to hit the gym before coming home and I am TIRED #it took a hot shower to feel my bones. and now I have to study. and then I have somewhere to be tomorrow #and then I go back to the neuro clinic on Monday. which is FUN I love it #but I don’t think I can be fully present in anything if I’m so divided between everything #multitasking is an absolute must but I think downsizing just a little bit will probably mean I get to be a healthier vessel #I just need time to chill in bed and watch silly movies and read books and chart stars and count rocks idk

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blushweddinggowns · 11 months

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Idea expanded, overtly adorable and protective Kas Eddie with established relationship Steddie.

Steve is obviously devastated when they find Dustin and Eddie. But he refuses to leave his body there, despite how horrifying and time-consuming it is to take his boyfriends dead body back up to the surface. And Steve just spirals, reduced to a crying mess that can barely do anything but sleep most days. And Eddie's body is sent to the morgue.

Where he wakes up at. He wakes up in a cold cabinet, horrified and confused. And what woke him up was the noise. The wet, squelching noises of his body knitting itself back together. But it's not just fixing itself. It's changing. And adding things that Eddie doesn't understand. But it fucking hurts.

And Eddie starts to freak the fuck out. He manages to kick open the cold locker he's in and he's still freaking out. Because now he realizes he's in a morgue. But he's not dead damn it. But he's different. And confused and scared and all he wants is Steve.

So he goes to him. And that's how Steve almost dies of a heart attack when a naked freezing should be dead Eddie taps on his window at three am. But he let's him in, of course he lets him in. He's so happy to see him he doesn't even question how huh maybe letting in your dead boyfriend who now has black veins, wings, a tail, and upside down looking scars is not a good idea.

But common sense doesn't matter because all Eddie does is hug him and cry. And it takes a while for both of them to calm down. But when they do Steve starts asking questions, none of which Eddie can answer. But it doesn't matter because he's here. And he's different and weird, but he's still him.

But he is different. Stronger, scarier, with teeth that can sharpen and nails that can morph into claws. And he's also more...touchy. And protective. And is glued to Steve's side, doing weird shit like smelling and licking him in random places, and nibbling on the back of his neck. And it takes Steve a minute to realize that he can freaking purr now. Not that Steve's complaining. He'd live in Eddie's lap forever if it meant he got to be with him.

Steve doesn't tell anyone at first because he's afraid someone might rightfully make the point that being in love with a maybe demon was not a good call. But the Party finds out anyway when they realize he's no longer sobbing every ten seconds. Everyone takes it well enough, even if they have to get used to Eddie involuntarily growling at them whenever they got close to Steve. But they figure it out. And now they have someone who isn't Eleven who can kill upside down monsters with ease which is a plus.

Even if he does this weird thing where he drops nearly every demon corpse he gets his hands on at Steve's feet for praise, always purring like the hybrid monster cutie he is when Steve tells him how good he is at protecting all of them and thanks him with a kiss, the bitter taste of black demon blood in Eddie's mouth be dammed.

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wigglebox · 7 months

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Suptober [Extended] - Day 21 || Love 💚💙

#suptober extended 23 #destiel #destiel fanart #dean winchester #castiel #spn #spnfanart #wiggleart #there is sooooo many scenes I could have chosen but I always revisit them just chilling on their front porch because it makes me happy and I #just love the homey domestic vibes and just being in each others prescene and stuff idk it GETS TO ME #okay sorry lmao #the original prompt for today was enchanted and I had an elaborate thing planned out but I am going to #a festival and I needed to be able to get this done fast however low key I’m happy #because for the coloring book I wanted to have this kind of a drawing in there somewhere #I draw this kind of scene so much that it felt like it should be included in a coloring book lmao

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badnew2005 · 1 year

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SUNNY IS A LOVE STORY @badnew2005

#okaaayyyyyyyy #just gonna post not gonna mill about like oooh it’s not good it’s not proper I DONT CARE . i know know knowwwwwwwa there’s loads iv missed #but . first posts i could find when looking sunny is a love story #tumblrs tagging system isn’t good And Neither Is Mine #iasip #sunny is a love story #so yeah idk if you’ve ever heard me say this but um. sunny is a love story #the gang #macden #web weaving #again i feel so so so awkward tagging ppl but like !!!! i used ur posts !!!!! it’s nothing it’s chill it’s casual it’s WHATEVER #i put The Origin of sunny is a love story post in like she’s worded soooo badly the grammar is all over the place it was a I NEED TO #SCREAM AND TELL EVERYONE IVE JUST DISCOVERED THAT SUNNY IS A LIVE STORY #i only took like an hour on this it’s a cute little practice of posting :)#iv just edited and added on the lov ewas there it was in th eoriginal draft idk how it got lost

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stiffyck · 4 months

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What if people started saying "I need to exercise more" or "I need to eat a bit healthier" instead of "I need to lose weight"

You can be healthy and fat

#and also #you dont need to be healthy all the time #some people will never be healthy #stop trying to be overly healthy if its at the cost of your happiness and mental health #you can eat junk food every once in a while and you dont need to feel bad about it #you can eat sweets #you can lie in bed all day if you need to just chill out and get some proper rest #you dont need to constantly be healthy and at the top of your game #stiff talk #delete later #maybe idk #this will probably stay up who knows #man it just hurts me when someone whos healthy and who looks good says “i need to lose weight”#like yea okay if thats what you wanna do go for it #but i think youre fine as you are #idk man im just rambling

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graciousdragon · 5 months

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OH MY FUCKING GOD

I JUST WENT TO MY LOCAL HOT TOPIC THAT I'VE BEEN GOING TO FOR LIKE. 5 OR 6 YEARS NOW RIGHT??

I GOT SOME MCR STUFF BECAUSE. OF COURSE. IF YOU'VE SEEN MY RECENT POSTING HABITS YOU KNOW. THE BRAINROT IS REAL

I WAS TALKING WITH THE CASHIER ABOUT THEM BECAUSE HE WAS ALSO A FAN AND HE FUCKING SAYS "you wanna know a fun fact? this is the hot topic the lead singer used to work at! :D"

FUCKING WHAT

GERARD WAY USED TO WORK AT MY LOCAL FUCKING HOT TOPIC?!?

AND AFTER I LEFT I LOOKED IT UP TO MAKE SURE HE WASN'T FUCKING WITH ME AND YEAH. HE WAS RIGHT. WHAT THE FUCK

SORRY FOR THE ALL CAPS THIS IS LIKE. WORLD-SHATTERING INFORMATION TO ME AND HE JUST DROPPED THAT SHIT SO CASUALLY WHAT THE HELL BRO. I NEEDED TO SCREAM ABOUT THIS SOMEWHERE

#rys.txt #tw caps #caps #LIKE. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??#I KNEW THEY WORKED AT A HOT TOPIC WHEN THEY WERE YOUNGER BUT I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS THAT ONE #ok. its ok i'm normal now (i'm not)#on another note. why are all hot topic employees like the nicest people on this earth. at least they are at mine #they always greet you when you walk in and ask if you need help and if you don't they leave you alone which is nice #and then when you check out they're always really chill and don't rush you and if you're buying or wearing something they also like they'll #talk about it with you #like. i know you have to be nice to people for a retail/customer service job like that but it always feels really genuine from them #same thing goes for spencer's employees too they're also like that #idk its just really nice for someone like me who's scared shitless of social interaction with strangers. it makes me way less anxious 👍#anyways. light and love everyone 💖 i'm gonna go recover from learning that information now #my chemical romance #mcr #gerard way

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zaacoy · 1 year

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Very rushed value practice before I sleep!! They are vibin'

#I feel like my lack of understanding of contrast/value holds my work back a lot #If time allows there'll probably be more pieces similar to this in the future as I learn and practice more #I like to think that freenoodles is the kind of couple that is very casual #Like date wise they don't need to go to some fancy restaurant or go on a special all day trip or anything #They just hang out and enjoy the other's company #I like to think that their version of dates are just finding a quiet comfortable place and then talking all day long #+picnics or “romantic” dinners together #(pigsy cooks a majority of if not all the food)#(they call them romantic but it's literally just like a normal dinner except it's just the two of them and maybe there's a candle lit)#They're just very chill and domestic in my head idk #freenoodleshipping #lmk freenoodles #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lmk #lmk tang #lmk pigsy #Zaacoy art💫

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bamsara · 11 months

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ok no yeah i hate human hormones and body chemicals actaully because the anxiety caused some physical symptoms and i had muscle spasms and speech problems for 30ish minutes and i havent had a Moment™️ like that in like 6 months, i think this game is rigged

also, i should stop drinking caffeine. again. attempt 2# at quitting caffeine i believe in us

also 2x i want to art stream. i want to draw. i will force this body to my will

#i havent had any brain damage shit in a while i was just chilling man #at least its not a daily hourly thing like it used to be in the start bruh idk how i handled that shit #anyway i have heating pad and chugging water #and the numbness is subsiding #i need to draw my ocs and also sun n moon and also commission #sara shush #sorry for the word ramble #tw health issues

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prostocupoftea · 14 days

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finally. i am free. now have this map part i was doing for whole of last month

more like last two weeks bc of how i procrastinated the shit out of it :')

also yes this is the same map as this post. ghfhgfdjh i hove their part so much go look if you haven't (which you statistically probably have)

anyways. *hypnotizes you into liking it*

Also woe! backgrounds under the cut! too much effort went into split second stuff so now you have to see it!

windows startup backround is... significantly lower-effort than other ones (: mostly bc it was made last and i got laizy, also bc i do not like painting nature

first one is now my profile top bc i like i so much

second was good to hide stuff in

and others are... there, i guess. my energy ran out for them unfortunately lol