#i'm sorry for dumping this on you but typing it up helps idk
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i received this lovely lovely lil thought from a lovely lovely anon in response to this question, and i think we ALL should get to enjoy it 🥹🩷
(Tw:Abuse / Manipulation (kind of; it's not overly gratuitous, but better safe than sorry))
Will! !! So I was thinking about your "would Bakugou chase after you, even after you're engaged" post (loved it! spinning it around in my head), and while I do think he'd probably let you go if you were truely happy with this other person, y'know what might change that? If this other person wasn't making you happy. (I’M SO SORRY FOR THE INCOMING WALL OF TEXT – please just delete if I’m being annoying!!) To explain; I think in this scenario, maybe you're still getting over a long-time unrequited crush (👀), and you're looking for something with a normal, sweet guy to help get over it. He's not the type you would usually go for, but he's nice enough (idk, maybe he has blonde hair, or red eyes, and maybe that makes it easier). And while you initially thought this would just be a short fling, it just kind of... gets away from you? A few dates turn into a few more, and then lots more and before you know it things are getting Serious. He's talking about moving in together, and you're taken aback by it (weren't you just starting to go out together? Isn't this too soon?). But it's not like you have anything real to complain about! He's not horrible to you or anything! He treats you well enough! It's just that you don't seem to feel anything... deep? for him. You don't daydream about a future together, you don't go out and wish he was there with you; Honestly, if he's not there with you, you don't think much about him at all (not the way you used to with him 👀). And hey, maybe sometimes (frequently) you end up doing things you didn't want to do, maybe he knows what to say to get you to acquiesce to his wants and needs, without coming across as manipulative. Or maybe you're just nervous! He isn't "rushing you long term commitments, which would dissuade you from leaving", the two of you are just caught up in a Whirlwind Romance! /Sarcastic. Being honest, that kind of thing grinds a person down after a while; you bend much more easily to his whims. He is, after all, so Normal and so Sweet - and how often do guys like that turn up? You'd be a fool to dump him now, now he knows you so well, and really. What are you expecting? Some Prince Charming(👀) to come and sweep you off your feet? Get real. So you get the flat together, and later on (though sooner than you'd like), you accept his proposal.
1 / 7 (I'm so sorry)
2/7 To my mind, this is the kind of diverging path for Bakugou. I think, if this was a genuine whirlwind romance, and it was recognised by the people around you, he'd probably back off. For all his brashness, he wouldn't want to hurt you by ruining your wedding day to the person you actually love. TBH I can kind of see him pining for you for the rest of his life, and hoping you become a widow/er so he get another shot to confess his feelings lmao. In that situation he could write off his own negative feelings towards your fiance as his own jealousy, right? If the fiance were actually bad for you, at least one other person from your respective friend group would notice. But!! I think that would change if his opinions were backed up by his friends (because it would demonstrate that it isn’t just his jealousy tarnishing his opinion of your boyfriend) Let's imagine that maybe he isn't the only one to think something Weird is going on. Maybe he's hanging out with Denki and Sero, because he's so obviously miserable about not confessing in time, and they're trying to cheer him up (it's been a month and he's mouldering. He is suffering). In walk Eijiro and Mina, who - while they were out getting snacks that Bakugou would never even consider eating if he wasn't in the depths of despair - just so happened to run into you and your new... boyfriend? Kind of? You seemed kind of reluctant to say the two of you were dating, but he seemed nice. Eijiro thinks he's kind of bland, and Mina knows you can do better (which she says both for Bakugou's ego, and because it's true), but nice enough. And you know, maybe, for the first time in a month, Bakugou stops sitting so rigidly. He doesn't slouch per se, no. He relaxes in the same way that tiger might relax before pouncing, in the way that a hunter might breathe out before pulling the trigger. A month of dating, and you still won't call the guy your boyfriend? When you'd introduced them to each-other (after your third date), Bakugou assumed it was his jealousy that made him hate the guy. Kind of boring, kind of pushy (a/n: no, he wouldn't clock the fact that he looks like off-brand Bakugou). He didn't think it would last too long, but it still felt bitter that that was the guy who beat him to the punch.
But seriously; a month of dating, and you still won't call the guy your boyfriend? That's... interesting >:)
3/7 So months roll by, and Bakugou keeps his eye on you. He flipflops between anguishing over his jealousy, and making sure that your “boyfriend” is treating you right. Of course, it’s made harder by the fact that he doesn’t see you that much any more. Your other friends notice it too; You’re not being kept inside your (shared) flat, but you always seem busy, and a bit tired. Ochako and Iida can usually grab you for lunch, Momo swings by your flat pretty often, but your social calendar seems so full now. Full of dates and outings with your new boyfriend. Apparently, you barely have a minute for someone you’ve been friends with since childhood.
It pisses Bakugou off to no end, but he’s keeping his distance (for now). Because the thing is, Bakugou – above anything else – respects you. If you want to waste your time on some loser, he’s not going to presume that he knows better for you! Bakugou’s many things but he’s not “fuckin’ presumptuous”. Besides, if you really were in dire straights, or needed help, you’d reach out. It’s not like you don’t still send him little messages every other day; memes you think he’ll like, little scenic photographs of your dates (conspicuously, your boyfriend is missing from every single one👀). He’s Fine. He can Be Patient. (Reader, he’s been seething for months).
4/7 HOWEVER. Flashing forward to The Proposal. I think it shakes him; firstly because the person he loves is getting married to another man, and he somehow thought you’d have ended it by now. But secondly because everyone else seems to agree that it’s weird! It’s way too soon for marriage to a guy that you don’t even seem to like all that much, and while everyone gently float their concerns to you that maybe it’s just a teeny tiny smidge too soon to get married (which you rebuff half-heartedly), the group-chat is popping the fuck off. It’s definitely too soon, this guy is Too Normal in a very weird way, they barely know him, the wedding is taking place really soon, they should stage in intervention (Eijiro&Tsuyu&Sero), they should kidnap you until you realise what a mistake it would be (Mina&Denki), they should kill him (Deku&Ochako&Iida), etc. It’s pretty weird, then, that Bakugou comes in as the voice of reason; you’re a grown up, and you can make your own decisions. If you really, genuinely want to marry him, that’s up to you; After all the freedom to make your own decisions comes with the responsibility to accept the consequences. (a/n: obvs it would be phrased in a far more Bakugou-esque fashion, but you get my point). So they relent, although they’re still concerned.
So maybe a few days before the wedding he sends you a message (because it’s tricky to get a hold of you in person); he just wants to know what you see in your fiance. He wants to know if you’re really serious about him, or if you’re just settling. It’s not phrased cruelly, but it’s blunt. The message he sends isn’t nice and sweet, but it’s honest, and it comes from a place of concern.
You read it and you don’t reply.
Flash forward again, and it’s the night before the wedding. Wedding Eve, if you will. Bakugou’s in a sour mood and tries to ease his pain by heading to a bar, but it doesn’t really get any better throughout the night. He’s conflicted now more than ever; Is this guy actually awful and bad for you, or is he just jealous? Is he not stepping in because he wants to be respectful of your wishes, or because he’s afraid that by doing so he’ll reveal his own feelings, and suffer the consequent (possible) rejection? Why didn’t he just tell you how he felt before this mess started? He has a few drinks to many, and falls into a dreamless sleep.
5/7 MERRY WEDDINGMAS. It’s the day of the wedding, and because of he hit the bottle too hard last night, Bakugou’s overslept (for the first time in his life, probably). He goes to check his phone – maybe he can still make it to the wedding the venue on time?-
TWO MISSED MESSAGES.
He didn’t realise, but last night you finally replied to his message: You don’t know if you want to get married to this guy.
It’s a long, winding message, but what it boils down to is this- You threw yourself into a relationship with someone you know you don’t really love (you like him well enough, but there’s no spark), because you’ve been spending years muddling your way through a hopeless crush on someone you think will never like you back. So you’ve let yourself go along with this guy, but now you’re on Wedding Eve, and you’ve never been so uncertain of yourself! Your fiance’s a sensible choice (He’s Bland, and he’s Pushy, but he’s Nice, and he’s Normal, but maybe you’re losing yourself in your relationship with him, but maybe you just have cold feet), but you’re not sure that you care any more, and it’s now or never, and it’s ‘You, Bakugou, It’s always been you’, and you’ve been too afraid to tell him, because when does real life play out like the films? When does the years long pining, the roller-coaster of emotions, the ‘I’ve been in love with you since the moment I saw you’, have a happily-ever-after in the real world?
The next message was sent a few hours later. Evidently, you’d calmed down somewhat, because you tell him that you’re sorry for sending him all of that on Wedding Eve, that you’ve had feelings for him for a long time, but if he doesn’t feel the same it would be the kind of closure you’d need to move on. If he doesn’t want to attend the ceremony, you’ll understand and leave him alone. But if he wants to “talk” (👀!!!), then you’ll be waiting for him.
Bakugou feels raw after reading your confession; All this time, and the two of you – despite sharing the same feelings – were so afraid, and for what? The relief, the fear, the hope, all spur him into action.
He’s hungover, he’s in his pyjamas, but all the same he’s rushing towards his expensive, fuel-efficient car as fast as he can, because he has a fuckin’ wedding to stop.
6/7 Meanwhile, you’re stressed, mentally twisting into knots. Bakugou didn’t even read the messages you sent last night, which is both a relief (now you can just get married and move on) and a heart wrenching disappointment (because if you’re being honest with yourself, you were hoping he’d stop you).
You’re wearing an outfit you don’t really like, and your fiance’s family are beaming at you, although you don’t really know them so well. The venue is pleasant but not what you would’ve chosen for yourself. As you walk down the aisle, the band sounds kind of off. Your family and friends are… what? Grimacing? Smiling? Both Smimacing? You aren’t sure.
The ceremony passes in a kind of blur, and you go through the all motions. Mostly, you think of the messages you’d sent to Bakugou. You’d felt so courageous when you finally – finally! - confessed your feelings to him, so hopeful that maybe instead of replying, you’d hear a knock at your door, and he’d sweep you off your feet and- then hours had passed without a word, and you’d been left wondering. Conflicted, and unsure.
As you wait for your fiance to finish his vows (that he wrote himself, but sound like he stole them from a Pinterest board), however, you have a mild epiphany. Did it really matter so much if Bakugou loved you back? Sure, it’d break your heart, but one day you’d heal from it. Besides, he wouldn’t want to settle for some nobody! Bakugou was loyal to his friends, and he wanted the best for them, and that was one of the things you loved most about him! Surely, you owed it to both him, and more importantly, yourself, to put an end to this madness!!
You steel yourself as it gets to That Part of the wedding. The officiant turns to you, and asks if you take this man to be your lawful wedded husband. You face your fiance, and open your mouth to say “Actually…. I DON’T” when-
The doors slam open, and who’s standing there in a matching pair of pyjamas, still holding his car keys? It’s Bakugou, and you only have to lock eyes with him for him to shout – in true romcom fashion – ‘I FUCKIN’ OBJECT’.
7/7 Everyone’s stunned, although the guests on your side of the venue look more thrilled than scandalised.
In truth, I wouldn’t normally peg Bakugou as the “Objecting at a wedding” type, but in this scenario – when the two of you have been pining for so long, when he knows you’d appreciate the spectacle, when he gets to show up that nobody who wasted your time for so long – I think maybe he’d make an exception. Maybe he wouldn’t make some long, protracted speech about how much he loves you, but he MIGHT run to the alter full tilt, and tell you that you’re making a mistake. I do think MAYBE he’d hold out his hand to you, a silent question in his eyes, all while your fiance sputters and rants.
Idk, maybe you say something to the effect of “Looks like he beat me to the punch – I object, too :)”, tell your ex-fiance you’re sorry, but you can’t do this. PERHAPS – after all of the years of wondering, and stressing about whether Bakugou would reject you – you’d just quietly take his hand. And maybe to two of you would scamper off down the aisle to the raucous applause of your friends and family, get into his hatchback or w/e, and drive off into the sunset, certain in the knowledge that – yes, there would be ramifications to running off together like this, but that whatever might come your way you’d face it together! MAYBE.
Idk, I just feel like if he was going to confess his feelings for you after you’d already been engaged, it might be in the form of kissing the back of your hand, pulling off your cheap, shitty engagement ring, throwing it out of the car window, and going for a long drive so you two can finally Talk.
Listen, this really got away from me, and I’m so sorry for flooding your inbox like this. I was just really caught up in the scenario, and wanted to share it with you. Much love 💖
#brain sleepy but i love everything about this#so much#i love how easily you weaved in the feelings and the angst and us knowing in our gut what we really wanted !!#this is pretty much my exact answer/thought in response to that question !!! the kind of scenario i love !!!!!#tysm for sharing this with us WAAAAHHH#this is so lovely thank you thank you !!#✿ ask willow#✿ recs
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kinda shy | ben chilwell
part II of pillow talk
request: “Pt 2 when they’re back in London and they both have distanced themselves from the cup?? AHHHH I just can sense chillys “oh I wanna show interest but I’m kinda shy and thinking about what she said” type thing. Like being cautious about his next move…, or her next move idk??? Either way this piece was incredible!!”
warnings: none
word count: 681
masterlist | requests are open!
After long physio sessions, Ben was finally home. The Club World Cup title and the trip to the Emirates were cool, the celebration was gigantic, but soon they had to return to London and with the return was also his physio routine after his knee surgery. A few days had passed, and his recovery was going well, but what really didn't get out of his head was his night with Y/N. He had her number saved on his phone and thought about calling or texting like he said he would, but every hour he would come up with something to do to put it off.
They had followed each other on Instagram and every now and then Chilwell was checking out her pictures and stories, but he found it kind of ridiculous because he had the mood to spend minutes of his day on Y/N's profile, but not to call her. Not that he didn't want to be with her again, he really wanted to show interest, but something was making him a little shy, wondering what she was going to say. He didn't even know if Y/N remembered him, maybe she got tired of waiting and could even be with someone else already.
He was sitting on the couch in his living room after having a nice shower with Oscar by his side. The dog was lying with his head on his owner's lap, receiving affection from one of Ben's hands. He stood like that for a while, his hand tingling, until he decided to fuck off and dial the number Y/N had saved there.
She answered on the second ring.
"Hello?" Her voice was soft on the other end of the line, Ben coughed weakly to allow his voice to come out.
"Hi, it's me." He scratched his throat, looking at Oscar as if asking for help.
"Me who?"
"Ben." He paused. She had to remember him. "Chilwell. Ben Chilwell."
"Oh, hi Ben." Chilwell wondered if Y/N was smiling as he said that. He would bet he was. The way she spoke his name gave the impression that she sketched a smile.
"Good to know you remember me." It was really good, almost a relief.
"Of course I remember, but I really didn't think you were going to call anymore."
"I'm sorry for the delay." He whined, hoping that wasn't the reason for the misfortune of all his chances.
"It's okay."
"I really wanted to call you, I really wanted to, but I still didn't know quite what to say." He gave a weak laugh, wanting to cut the tense mood, and I could swear Y/N let out a little air through his nose as well. "I get kind of shy sometimes, I didn't want to be a jerk." Ben confessed feeling his hands getting sweaty, he couldn't remember feeling so nervous, even more so talking to a woman he had already slept with once.
"Cute." Maybe she would have given him another smile, but it was what she said next that surprised him. "Well, I went to a Chelsea game last week, I looked for you, but you weren't there. I was thinking of calling you on Instagram, but since you said you were going to call, I was afraid I'd get dumped." Laughter. Ben laughed, too. He would never blow her off.
"Really? Did you look for me?"
"Yes."
Now he was really happy to hear that the interest was not just coming from one party.
"Unfortunately, I'm not playing because of a knee injury," he said.
"That's too bad."
"Yeah, I'll be out for a while longer." He lamented more to himself than to her. It was awful not to be able to play, but at that moment there wasn't much he could do. "But we can still watch. Do you want to go to the next game with me?"
"Sure!" Ben smiled at the speed and excitement Y/N used to answer. "I'd love to."
"Then I'll text you all the details, is that okay?"
"Yes, but only if you promise me you won't disappear again."
"I wouldn't even be crazy."
#ben chilwell#ben chilwell x reader#ben chilwell smut#ben chilwell x y/n#ben chilwell oneshot#ben chilwell imagine#ben chilwell fluffy#ben chilwell fluff#ben chilwell one shot#ben chilwell angst#ben chilwell imagines#ben chilwell fic#ben chilwell fanfic#ben chilwell fanfiction#football smut#football fluffy#footballer fanfic#football one shot#football fluff#football angst#football imagines#chelsea imagines#england nt imagines#footballer x reader#my writing: ben chilwell#requests: ben chilwell
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Okay I'm finally sitting down to properly watch the PJO series so here's an episode-by-episode live blog I guess. (Fair warning, I haven't read the books since I was a teenager, I am a smidge of an apologist for the films, and my favorite adaptation so far has been the musical.)
Episode One:
All of the actors are doing a really good job, I especially like Sally.
The costume design for both the monsters and the humans is pretty killer. I want Percy's sweater.
I also love the little seaside cabin and want to live there!!!
This is such a mild gripe BUT as someone with dyslexia I wish there was a better way to visually depict it without like, doing the swapping letters thing cuz that's just not what it's actually like at all.
Gabe maybe feels a little too funny. Like I'm supposed to hate him and think it's justified that he deserves to be turned into stone at the end, this version of him is really.....toned down, and his banter with Percy and Sally was fun to watch. I should hate him, but really he just came across as unpleasant. Less abusive asshole and more "old married couple who share interests but can't communicate without shouting" you know?
Loved Grover's little "I'm 24 actually" lmao that was great.
Not a fan of Percy immediately recognizing the Minotaur within a millisecond of it appearing before the audience even got a good look at it. Like, I just sat there thinking "how can he even see it?" rather than feeling scared of a big monster barreling at them.
The action is uh....fine? Feels a little lackluster. Or kinda....divorced from the rest of the show weirdly?? Idk it makes me feel like I'm watching a movie of a movie if that makes sense?? But we'll see where they go with it. (I know banter during a fight isn't realistic and people make fun of Marvel for it, but like...it helps to have at least a little talking. We don't wanna be Man of Steel.)
I feel like there's been a few "slightly out of sync ADR" moments but they weren't too distracting.
Pacing into Sally saying goodbye felt a little long, kinda took the shock of her dying out of the scene, but the actress REALLY sold all the emotional beats so I'll forgive it.
I LOVE the credits sequence!!! Reminds me of the designs on that one box set of the books in a really cool way.
Episode Two:
Oh yes the ugly ass neon orange shirts are here bless!
FUCK YES THAT'S DIONYSUS BAYBEEE!! My ONLY note is that he def could have turned up the energy a little, but that's probably just bcs I love how loud and unpleasant he is in the musical and I also know how unhinged this actor can be.
Chiron is such a delight <3
I like the cabins too, way better than how I imagined them as a kid reading the books lol
Oh, I can see why the new fans fell for Luke so hard.
Grover assuming a human being squished would be like an old banana is very funny. Felt very book-humor in a good way.
Clarisse!!
Oh damn actual disabled half-bloods, very cool!
Minor but I can't actually tell what Percy did wrong with the bow? Weird editing I guess.
Aside from that I actually love a good "fuck up" montage, I honestly wish it were a little longer.
Probably doesn't matter but I don't get having them burn the food after they've started eating? I thought that was a before you sit down type thing.
Percy burning the blue candy to try to talk to his mom was sweet tho T_T
"real friends" hahahaha.....yeah.......about Luke.......
yay! hazing!
Oh I love Annabeth already >:D
Thalia.....is pronounced differently than I thought....?
(I'm sorry I'm too much of a fan of 'Tree on the Hill' for this exposition dump. That shit hits harder when coming from Grover.)
Percy giving Annabeth the "actually I suck and my self esteem is riding on this so like pls don't ask me to do anything hard T_T" talk is just, so good lmao
ofc he doesn't know what's going on Annabeth you didn't tell him anything
Okay the action is a lot better when it's between the actual characters and doesn't involve a 3D monster, though I still had trouble following all the hits Percy was taking.
Oooh I can see why people did so much art of Percy being claimed that was a good shot.
FUCK YEAH TELL HIM YOU'RE SALLY JACKSON'S SON
(I hope they kept the Oracle in the attic...)
Okay I have to go do some things and then I'll be back for more!
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destielification of newgirl is so easy it's also becoming one of my favourite things to do. consider my AU #1432255363 that i came up with after watching the "You're my husband, you're like my wife" scene that's probably never getting written:
dean and cas have been friends for a while, cas is the one in love with Dean..dean is like. Cas is my Best Friend. idk if he's in the closet about himself or just about his feelings or what. but yeah. anyway.
dean is dating someone. Lisa, probably (I'm so sorry girl I'm so sorry they always do you dirty like this). he thinks it's going great (it's not) and he thinks he should totally get married to her (he should not), so he's like I'm gonna do it I'm gonn ask her. but lisa. LISA IS SMART. so she realizes that it's not working and on the day that he's gearing up to propose to her, she breaks up with him.
cas knows about all this. they were supposed to celebrate the week after dean was supposed to propose, but he's broken up with instead so they take time off their respective work places and go on a roadtrip together. because nothing fixes a broken heart like bro-ing it out with your bro amirite lads? anyway.
fast forward to dean getting into a stupid fight at a stupid bar and they get thrown out and cas is taking care of his wounds just like in the "doggies or trucks?" scene and then they have that conversation where dean's all of COURSE i got broken up with I'm STUPID and an IDIOT and i clearly AM THE WORST and it's good that i got DUMPED because clearly NO ONE deserves to be TIED DOWN TO ME and cas is like shut up shut up shut up of COURSE you're not all that you're the most amazing person i know you [lists everything dean does for him] and then he's like "and well if Lisa broke up with you, it's her loss, because you would make a great husband. and i know this because you've been a great husband to me. i mean you're LIKE a husband to me. i mean YOU'RE LIKE MY WIFE. I MEAN NO I AM LIKE YOUR WIFE. WHAT. YOU KNOW WHAT. BEER. BOOZE." and he just runs away. and dean is sitting there having an epiphany like oh OH OH because he HAS been doing all this for CAS, yes, but he has NOT been doing this stuff for his actual girlfriends and he IS kind of like Cas' wifehusband and Oh he IS GOOD AT IT but because IT'S CAS because HE — OH. oh. OH.
anyway they get through the end of the trip and cas is like I'm sorry if I made it weird obviously i didn't mean it like that like you're not even my type what anyway have a good rest of your single life bye
and now dean is like oh shit cas does NOT like me but I'm so obviously in love with him that it's stupid and now my asshole motherfucker of a life sucks SO MUCH WORSE bc clearly i can't date anyone until i get over cas and i don't think i can get over him by leaving him like i usually do because he is EVERYTHING! TO ME!! etc etc
idk how this would resolve itself like I'm sure dean enlists the help of the entire winchester family support brigade and they're all like DUH! i mean LIKE. Oh Nooo this is BRAND NEW information!!!! and they're like no cas likes you and dean's like no he does not.
fun bonus if cas just starts fake-dating one of his friends so dean doesn't feel weird after his pseudo-love confession(or real dating, I'm not picky), but things get out of hand because dean is INSANELY jealous, and he realizes that he's ALWAYS BEEN insanely jealous and possessive but he would just write it all as Bad Vibes™ but now he has to confront his own stupid feelings and then like every good soap opera, this culminates in a Big Dramatic Moment where dean is like "Actually your boyfriend SUCKS and idc i will never like him because he's not supposed to be with you because I LOVE YOU and WE are the wifehusbands who were MEANT TO BE" and cas is like :O :O what. :O :O :O
and then! cas either a) breaks up with the guy he was only dating to prove to dean that he is Not Into Him or b) calls off the fake-dating thing because nuh-doy!
Smooches, kisses, gay sex, etc.,
the end.
LITERALLY. SO EASY.
#newgirlnatural#doe is talking again#doe needs to stop talking and get to work#another random stupid headcanon I'm setting free into the void#I JUST THINK. DESTIEL COULD DO ALL THE ROMCOM TROPES. ALL OF THEM. MANY TIMES EVEN!!#destiel#spn headcanons
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enhypen as sour
...so i said i'd finish my work before posting another but i couldn't help it I PROMISE I'LL FINISH IT EVENTUALLY THOUGH. thanks for reading, y'all!
ni-ki as brutal
"they'd all be so disappointed, 'cause who am i if not exploited?"
some maknaes give me such unmistakable teenage angst energy (as i showed by choosing hueningkai for jealousy, jealousy)
&& ni-ki is not an exception imo!! he's also actually seventeen i kinda had to ✋
anyway yeah ni-ki's life is great in some ways but it also sucks in other ways, just like olivia depicts in the song
like yeah he's in a big k-pop group but also he's been through so much 🤧. this obviously does not mean that he's in any hurry to grow up, but y'all get my point (i hope)
sunghoon as 1 step forward, 3 steps back
"which lover will i get today? will you walk me to the door or send me home crying?"
sunghoon is not the type to stay with you if he doesn't like you
but in this case, he's conflicted. (ultimately, he does not like you enough to not toy with your feelings, but alas...)
&& yeah, he might regret it soon after acting cold, but that doesn't matter because he'll act nice but do it again & possibly repeat until the end of the relationship
oh god, heartbreaker sunghoon, y'all!! it's a concept!! that i live by!! (i'm not okay.)
sunoo as deja vu
"a different girl now, but there's nothing new, i know you get déjà vu"
sunoo would totally do the same activities with multiple partners 😭
he wouldn't think it's a big deal though?? he'd associate the things with good times, not people
it would suck but there's not much you can do about it
on the CONTRARY...he'd probably be pissed about you doing the same stuff with other people
especially if the break-up was on you
he'd complain to his friends about it & they'd be on his side in either situation (so would i, sorry y'all)
heeseung as enough for you
"don't you think i loved you too much to think i deserve nothing?"
this scenario is a real tragedy to imagine so i'm sorry about that 😭
just as with any relationship, if you were with heeseung, he would have to love you just as much as you do him.
&& if a relationship with him fell apart it would feel particularly bitter because there would be little warning signs along the way that you didn't think were a big deal
like the whole line about him not complimenting her makeup ✋🙄 (come on bro,, it's not that hard!!)
the real tragedy is that he didn't want more from you...he just didn't want you
anyways 🤠 like she said!! you'll find someone who does find you exciting :)
jake as happier
"i hope you're happy, but not like how you were with me"
it would be so hard to hate jake after a break-up 😭 especially if he was kind about it & took your feelings into account
even more so if it's been a while since the two of you called it quits & you should have moved on but you haven't
because tbh who would be able to?
&& seeing him with someone else would leave you conflicted because how could you possibly be upset with him? or his new partner?
so you'd kind of have to suck it up :( & hope he isn't as happy as he was with you :(
jay as favorite crime
"know that i loved you so bad, i let you treat me like that"
so this song is about partially blaming yourself after a heartbreak, because you "let" them treat you like that
getting dumped by this man would be so devastating
again, it would be slow -- even if you tried your hardest to hold on because you wanted him so badly, he would end up letting go in the end
it's such a horrible feeling. i don't wish it upon anyone.
anyways...before you know it 🚨 wee-ooo wee-ooo 🚨! ur heart is broken! 💔🚔 (sorry i just felt compelled to do that idk)
jungwon as hope ur ok
"somehow we fell out of touch, hope he took his bad deal and made a royal flush"
as i said in my txt post, this album only has 11 songs, so this one is also assigned to soobin
&& tbh i have a pretty similar reason for choosing it but i think jungwon would be the one thinking about his old friends & acquaintances (rather than his friends thinking of him, which i said for soobin)
he seems to have a really kind heart, & the reason he's the leader of enhypen is because he's so caring
oh wow 🤧 got myself in my feels about him thinking of his i-land buddies 🤧 i'm gonna go now
txt version ☆ emails i can't send version ☆ masterlist
#hoes4hoseok#enhypen#olivia rodrigo#kpop imagines#enhypen fluff#enhypen imagines#enhypen reactions#ni ki#nishimura riki#jungwon#yang jungwon#sunoo#kim sunoo#sunghoon#park sunghoon#jake enhypen#jake sim#jay enhypen#park jongseong#heeseung#lee heeseung#enhypen angst#enhypen x reader
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hello, i saw that you take asks asking for advice? sorry this is gonna be kind of long-
so at some point (i have no idea when, i've always had a really bad sense of time lol. i think it was maybe almost exactly last year? idk lol) i started talking with a voice in my head (which i passed off as an imaginary friend), but over time they kind of. multiplied. and then i kinda went 'ah shittake mushrooms am i plural??'
initially i kinda went 'oh whatever' and didn't end up interacting much with (what i believe to be) my system for a while. if it's relevant, i ended up getting a concussion at the end of july and before that i was not having a funky fresh time in school so i kind of shoved plurality onto the back burner
then in december, my director made a passing joke about the possibility of me being plural during a rehearsal, and someone in the system (who doesn't wish to be named) said something to the effect of 'he doesn't know there's (i forget the number) of us' and i ended up spending the weekend obssessively researching plurality.
anyway- i've been treating it as if i was system for the past little while bc i'd rather be wrong than y'know. accidentally ignore real people that happen to share my brain. (when i don't accidentally think to myself that i'm probably not plural while talking to them-). and i guess i kinda want an external opinion?
-i do experience a lot of dissociation, and often don't feel like i'm me or that these hands are not mine, or that i'm not controlling myself and it's just some autopilot being on. this has been happening for as long as i remember. i also seem to have two handwritings, and have communicated with members of the system via journalling
-i did use to do competitive sports from a young age, which i hear can potentially cause undue stress/trauma to a child, so that could also be something?
-some of them (members of the system, we haven't decided on a term bc communication is spotty) do fit classic roles of a system. most notably is there's one that continually keeps me from doing things that could harm myself and helps 'protect' me from intrusive thoughts
-when i discovered apparently people remember shit and the brain doesn't just dump it like an hour later, that surprised me. i'm still in my teens, but i genuinely do not remember much about... anything tbh. the term 'gray out' honestly explained a lot for me
-i have aphantasia, but the system insists there's a headspace. some of them make fun of me for 'being blind in headspace', but i think they're also helping?? me with the aphantasia, since recently i've been able to see shadowy outlines of stuff they 'airdrop' to me. this includes waking me up by bombarding me with the word 'boo' zooming at my face when i was half asleep.
-sometimes i can feel them like, hugging me or comforting me
-i also do feel some sort of presence in there, and can sometimes pinpoint where certain members are. i also seem to be unable to access the 'back half' which is apparently intentional so.
i mean there's probably more but my memory is not great lol. typing this out does make me feel a bit more like this is real and i'm not misinterpreting things (i do have a very active imagination, hence why i initially went 'ah late imaginary friend having'). but i'd still like an external opinion, so thanks for taking the time to read this half rant that is way longer than it should be haha
yes, i do think you're plural. i have nothing else to say lol, all of that sounds very plural and it seems like you already know that anyway
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jaemin foul for cheating but he kinda valid for speaking up about not feeling loved?!? Idk I mean ofc he shouldn’t have cheated and there should have definitely been more communication to help them but is he so wrong for feeling neglected? Idk idk I just idk sympathize with him but still fucking hate that he cheated as way to be validated!!
I think I sympathize because my ex bf was the same where there was a lot of priority given to everyone but me and I was kinda just there to nurse his ego and make him feel good but never vise versa and that shit broke me the difference being I accepted that as my fate and he would tell me it’s because I’m “hard to love but he’s trying his best to love me” and like I carried that with me everywhere and I was always like … dang and idk i stayed in that cycle until he broke up with me but I feel like if jaemin didn’t cheat he might have been in the same place I was idk?
Sorry for the random trauma dump
-🦒
noo dont ever be sorry baby!!!! what im about to say is in absolutely no way belittling or disregarding your experience because i myself know exactly how you feel/felt and the cycle you are talking about and even if i didn't i'm pretty sure i can somehow phathom what you went through. (i'm so proud of you btw!🥺🤍)
now onto COLD HEARTS!jaemin however, he's just..not in that position. i've tried my best to depict him rather toxic and manipulative but i have realised that i should have made it more obvious or like out in the open to give his charcter the light i needed him to have.
ofc he's absolutely valid for feeling neglected, however – and this will be revealed in future chapters – he was never really neglected in the first place. he simply hates everyone in y/n's life and wanted her all to himself all while maintaining his own social circle as usual. on top of it all, he was actually the one in your ex bf's position since he constantly told y/n things like "nobody can put up with an attitude like yours" or "you're so difficult to talk to i feel like i can't ever have a normal conversation with you" when he simply didn't like her responses in the sense of its meaning and not even necessarily her tone.
you will understand the type of person he is the more chapters come since, yes they broke up, but he'll remain a firm part of the story till the very end!
i hope this somehow makes it a little more understandable which pov i wrote jaemin from.
sympathising with him in that matter is absolutely understandable bc we all would feel the same way, but i can reassure you that CH!jaems isn't one of us 💀
oh also, additionally i gotta comment here that y/n had to raise herself and her siblings and grew up in a very difficult household which lead to her having said attitude jaemin complains so much about. he knew this and basically – as the boys state in chap 5 – has made it his challenge to see if he can have her submit to him and prove himself that he can handle every type of woman.
i hope this all makes sense, i sometimes tend to forget that you guys cant actually look into my brain so i gotta type these thoughts and behind the scenes out every now and then! thank you sm for your feedback baby, ily 🥺🤍
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(you can totally leave this til whenever you have time honestly I need to get it out of my head as much as get feedback tbh)
Am I a bad person for breaking up with the old hosts boyfriend?
So. When we discovered the system, before I split, old host (we'll call them M) had a polycule of three people, a boyfriend (A) and a agender partner (K). When M felt ready they explained everything to A and K and let a few headmates introduce themselves. K was really nice and understanding, it didn't quite get the entire concept of plurality or fictives (which we have plenty of) but it was friendly and it's been great about asking questions to understand us better and even now still reads resources we send it for stuff it doesn't quite get.
A, uh.. Immediately started cracking jokes about our fictives. He was calling Shoto "knock off Zuko" and telling him to 'roast marshmallows for him', and threatening to send.. Italian mobsters.. After Hitoshi? Because 'Hitoshi is what Mario does to make Yoshi stick his tongue out'? M and Keith, our gatekeeper, both told him to knock it off, and he wasn't as outwardly bad for a while, but still didn't really interact with anyone else much.
Fast forward a bit and M went dormant, I became the new host. K was confused but understanding, it never made me feel bad for being here when M wasn't, and it still to this day talks to us plenty. (M is back but isn't allowed to front at home for reasons, we schedule dates sometimes where it can spend some time with them outside now) But A kind of just. Started acting really weird.
I don't remember a lot of the details here so sorry if it gets fuzzy.
I am an alterhuman in headspace, I was me one day and the next I woke up with cat ears and a tail. Still not sure how that happened but I've embraced it. A started making.. Not entirely safe for work jokes about it. That made me uncomfortable but he never really apologized? He also called me "the cat" like, in a very distant dehumanizing way?
He also uh. Blatantly misgendered someone, repeatedly, and then never apologized because 'his profile picture makes him look like a girl'.
I know there was more but it's all hazy. Eventually Keith sent him a long message that he had to start taking this stuff seriously and that he was treating us like a goofy game and not someone dealing with a lot of trauma that was struggling to hold everything together, told him he had to do some research and learn the ugly side of our disorder and stop acting like we're playing pretend. K directly offered to answer questions and help him figure it out better during the same conversation. But he basically ghosted us for a month after that, never said anything, never reacted when we tried to talk to him, just totally shut us out, so finally I messaged him like, "look I'm sorry but this is too much, I can't handle you in our life right now, I know I'm not M and maybe only they can dump you but as far as I'm concerned I don't want you around" and kicked him from our server/blocked him a few places. That was a few months ago and apparently he ghosted K at the same time, even though they were also dating and we never asked K to pick sides or stop seeing him?
Literally everyone I've talked to about this says I did the right thing and that it's his own fault for not being a safe person for us and not wanting to learn, and even typing it all out, I know I'm better off with him gone, but I can't shake feeling guilty. I didn't really choose to be host, the brain just kind of shoved me forward when M left and I had to roll with it, but I can't stop this feeling like everything I'm doing is destroying M's life and making everyone else miserable. I also had to cut off a friend that flat out fakeclaimed us, even though they'd been friends for years.
Idk I just feel like I'm a placeholder and eventually M is gonna want their body back and I'm gonna have completely torpedoed everything about their life.
(This is going to get long, apologies in advance.)
Hey, it's Solo typing right now. I was host for the first half of the year, and I had some really similar feelings about messing up Nix's life too. But I'll get to that in a minute.
Short answer: no, you're not a bad person for breaking up with him, he sounds like a complete asshole.
Long answer: you deserve to have someone in your life that'll treat you better than that, especially for (I'm assuming from context clues, sorry if I'm wrong) having traumagenic and/or disordered plurality that you quite literally cannot control. The jokes he made were extremely far out of line, and also super disrespectful, in my opinion.
That's not even touching on the fact that he was told at least once to quit, and decided to?? Fucking ghost you??? Nah, I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him. I'm really sorry if that comes across as rude. It's just, I hate seeing people like you being mistreated just for being a system. It's rife with ableism, it's hurtful to you, it's just... unacceptable. And he probably knew damn well what he was doing, because people who are actually decent wouldn't have left you in the dust as soon as they were called out for being awful.
Now, as far as the being afraid part... I relate really, really strongly to that. That's why I chose to come out and answer this ask, actually. Because, I wanted to tell you... you're not doing anything wrong.
I'll spare you the time and unnecessary details, but TL;DR is that Nix desperately needed a break for about a solid 6 months. So, I split, and I was immediately thrown into the driver's seat.
The entire time, I felt exactly the way you do. "What if he comes back and hates all the things I've done?". That sorta thing. But, it turns out, when he came back... all the changes I had made were for the better. I cut toxic people out, I went to therapy, etcetera. So, despite my fears, he was actually really, really appreciative and happy about it.
I can't guarantee things will be exactly the same way for you guys, but I do want to say that -- at least from where I'm sitting -- you're making changes for the better, too. Even if M comes back and doesn't necessarily agree with everything you've done, I don't think anyone can fault you for genuinely trying your best with what you were given, considering the circumstances.
Basically... give yourself some credit. It's going to be ok, and everything is going to work out eventually. That much I can promise.
Sorry this got so unbelievably lengthy, I tried to cut down on it, but I had a lot of thoughts. Please feel free to come back if you have absolutely anything else you want to add! You're always welcome here. ❤️
🖤💜💙💚💛
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Hi lovely, I like the idea of this ASTRO... THING (?) Sounds fun! I adore your intuition and your readings are always amazing! 🌟
I would definitely ship you with an Earth Sun, probably a Taurus or a Capricorn. Why? Though highly intuitive, you seem to be so grounded and practical. No one should come for your healthy intuition and your inner peace. I think the two signs mentioned above would understand this assignment the best. In my opinion, these two are the masters at keeping things stable.
Speaking of moon signs, I can’t make my mind up. Taking an earthy Sun for granted, here are my top picks out of every element:
Fire: Leo Moon
Earth: Taurus Moon
Air: Aquarius Moon
Water: Cancer Moon
All of them are wise in their own way. My top pick however would be Leo Moon. Those people sometimes get dumped as drama queens and/or manchild‘s but the evolved ones make great companions. They are fiercely loyal and make great at expressing sincere feelings.
The rising sign is another challenge. Speaking of elements, I would prefer seeing you with a Fire or Air rising.
A Sagittarius rising or Aries rising would be nice. On the other hand, I‘d like to think of an Aquarius or Gemini rising. I ship you with someone who makes an adventurous, bold first impression. Someone who appears to be light-hearted and funny at first glance. Or, as Aquarian risings are a bit more detached, enjoys being around people.
💐👑🫶🏼🦚🌸🔮
Hello! Woah, thanks a lot for this long detailed explanation (and for joining ofc hehe)! :)
I feel spied on lol
I have Cap in my 7th house but Idk if I feel okay paired with them: the ones in my family to feel a bit too stubborn/self focused for my like. I have Taurus Lilith though, so I guess Taurus would do? Despite the ones I know... well... kinda boring/strict/getting on my nerves people lol But ofc I'm up to change my mind: it depends on other signs and the person too.
Someone else mentioned Cancer Moon, it would pair with my ASC so I guess it would be good? Leo Moon... yeah if the evolved type I agree with you. Someone expressive would help me and probably also our communication. As for the ASC, adventurous, bold and funny are qualities I really enjoy (I'm already too detached as an Aqua stellium, I need someone that isn't as much as me -despite I like to have time for myself/stuff- :'D)
Now, let me think for you.
Hmm I'd say a mix of Cancer/Pisces (more on the first), Capricorn and Libra. On a second thought, Virgo and Scorpio (more likely in the big 6 though). Hmm the main energy I get is Cancer, nurturing, caring... ofc may be a bit annoying sometimes but they (we) just need confirmations/love and someone to nurture. Cap would help balance that and ground them more, together with Libra (that would add to the loving side but in a more communicative way). I would consider Aries too just to add a bit of "fun" in the relationship :D
Sorry if I am not writing so accurately and as much as you did but my knowledge is not that good yet :/
@research-gallery thank you for the feddback, glad it resonates (and ty for the loving words too)!<3
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Idk if this is helpful from a complete stranger or maybe even creepy if it's creepy I'm sorry but hi one of the crush anons here, I'm really into masc people and butches and find you really hot and I've also always been the more active part in relationships, always making the first steps etc and it never bothered me and it never made me think of my partners as less masculine/hot or whatever, so there's definitely people out there whose type you are that have no problem with a more "passive" Partner again sorry if this comes off as creepy
oh not creepy at all thank you this actually made me feel nice ;__; also makes me feel nice that you think I'm hot???????? legit mind-blowing to me actually.
it's sad to admit but I have a lot of baggage from a relationship from jeeze. 4 years ago?? where I would get nitpicked and hounded over my passiveness and overall very low-key personality (she would straight up hang up on me if I was too quiet on facetime like girl I thought we were chilling....). BUT YEAH. I have yet to figure out how to work through that but you're right there are people out there who are fine with it. that relationship was really just a case of her thinking she loved me but she really only loved the idea of me and tried to mold me into that image. which isn't my fault!!!!
thank you again sorry to dump all that on you lol I appreciate you a lot
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Hi Jude! I'm so anxious about my first appointment... stuff came up and I had to change locations and providers (still informed consent but not planned parenthood anymore). But! Otherwise I'm really very excited.
Your drink sounds really good. I love lavender in all forms but I've never drank it :0! I wish there was a cafe close to me! Alas. Country boy pretty much right now.
Has your day been good? I hit post limit? How are classes? (I assume they've started back up for everyone by now?) Find any new music? I found a song byyy The Ooze(s)? I think. It's short but SO good and loud and I could play it on repeat for HOURS!!!
Hi elias!! i saw u hit post limit, i admire ur devotion to #cecilsweep but you have killed my dash today oh my god 😔 /j (ily keep doin what ur doing, but holy shit dude) im so excited for you to start t! im sorry about the rearranging, it was the same way when i started- its always difficult to set stuff up at first!
I adore lavender in pretty much anything. My family are absolute freaks when it comes to how much tea we consume so we order several flowers and herbs in bulk, lavender being one of them and i make lavender syrup all the time when im home. It’s rlly tasty in coffee, but has a reputation of its own for being the east coast gay drink lmao, and is often overpriced. i live within walking disatance from four local coffee shops so im a bit spoiled lmao!!
my day’s been good, i woke up at like noon as most weekends start for me, i have some observation hw to start on (i have plenty of time tho.) but im pretty excited since i adore the professor im taking observation II from and he is nice enough to allow me to use color in all my assignments <3 Usually ur supposed to just do b/w charcoal but thats so fucking boring oh my god and this professor is a huge fan of my color work so he knows how much a chore b/w is for me. I’m thinkin of maybe drawing my hrt? idk i have to think abt it but i thought it would be fun.
as for music, on my way up to college on tuesday dad and i listened to the one pansy division cd we have like 3 times in a row and i havent rlly gotten over it yet and have been listening to their cover of liz phair’s ‘flower’ on repeat ever since. im honestly surpised we dont own more pansy division, my dad’s seen them a few times and theyre on one of his fave labels (lookout!) so it’s kinda odd we only have the one cd. but yknow, streaming is a thing, im just a snob and like physicals a bit more. I’ve been scouring bandcamp as usual for more twee and have been rlly digging a band called the harriets from osaka i believe, who have all of three songs out but i really like. I also bought a few of the max levine ensamble’s albums on bandcamp, theyre available on streaming but bandcamp doesnt have the sound limits other streaming services have and that band is best heard LOUD thru headphones. (i think some bands sound better when u can barely discern the sound LMAO) Theyre a pop punk band from dc that i started listening too exclusivly bc one of their members (spoonboy) is genderqueer and i wanted to hear more genderfuck type music. (tho pansy division is fufilling my every need for more songs abt gay male femmes rn oh my god. Listen 2 their cover of femme fatele, it makes me grin so hard. ) I’m on an honest search for queercore thats not like. how do i describe it? like neo-hardcore? like yknow, the very harsh and almost electronic hardcore thats popular rn but doesnt totally resemble older hardcore. I found a few bands i liked (DUMP HIM is pretty good, i also like yonic boom, which i searched for hours to make sure they weren’t terfs and can confirm they have at least one trans member if that helps a little👍) i also have learned that trying to find music that isnt hyperpop or death metal in the transcore tags on bandcamp is pretty impossible, tho i keep trying! what can i say, im a dude driven by horrible production quality, lts wild to me how polished some hardcore sounds nowadays when the main reason i like it is bc its grainy and harsh and hard to listen to. My love for twee but disdain for modern indie follows suit with that, if it doesnt sound like it was recorded on a budget of one dollar i dont want it!!! (with a few exceptions, i still cant shake my power pop infused childhood.) oh god that last paragraph is probably unreadable but yknow. autism
thanks for sending me an ask ily💖💖💖💖
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has it been 3 hours? idk. consider this a check-up. if he does something i can always get on a plane and grand battement him in the nuts. maybe some brazilian jiu-jitsu people can join (this is your fault, you made me realize ballet can be used violently)
also, update on the western festival: it's essentially a small town with a population of about 400 people near québec that looks like a small town in texas and once a year for about 10 days the population increases by about 1200% and everything kind of culminates in a rodeo...competition i guess
just to dump this on you because why not, i kinda feel like shit. like it's a rodeo, you know what's gonna happen, you know what kind of people will be there but still, thought i'd be able to handle it better than i actually did. i think you know i'm part of a party, it's an environmental party located centre-left, i helped organize fridays for future demonstrations and all that stuff, so a rodeo is not really my thing but i went anyway, and now i feel really, really bad.
sorry bout that.
if i fall asleep, g'night, folks, don't let the bed bugs bite
- 💍 anon jr
Sweetie, I’m sorry you had to go through that. I can imagine the type of people you may have encountered today. I hope no one actually said or did anything terrible to you. That you just had a bad time because you were surrounded by a certain type of person that you aren’t particularly fond of (which if you’ve got political ties - you’re always going to find yourself in situations with people you aren’t fond of, unfortunately).
I was in Calgary one year for their rodeo, so I’m familiar with what this event looks like, in theory. Though the Calgary rodeo was quite large.
I’m sorry for showing you violence exists in everything 😁 jk no I’m not. Only use this info for good, please. I don’t need to be getting a phone call from your host family that you got suspended for fighting.
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The last time this blog reblogged an image was over a year ago. The last time it posted original content was over four years ago.
I am endlessly happy that my resources are still widely used and shared after all this time and that people appreciate the work I did here.
I still get asks from people who probably haven't paid attention to the timestamps. I'm not really planning on answering them, I'm sorry.
90% of the asks I get, and had gotten back when I was active, were "how do I establish a relationship with [this Pokémon]?" For every one of these asks all I did was look on Bulbapedia for all available information on the Pokémon in question and then abstract it outwards to things possible in real life.
While I'm glad this may have helped people it's honestly not the most mentally stimulating thing to talk about. I understand being new to something and unsure and wanting to seek advice from someone who seems to know more than you, but I guarantee that every single one of you is capable of answering those types of questions on your own. I mean this in the most empowering way possible.
One of the big reasons I stopped doing this is because of one odd encounter I had where someone messaged me on this blog. I won't divulge the personal details this person sent me, but they told me something along the lines of how a spirit was affecting them to the point of infringing upon their personal life and health.
They overshared a lot of stuff that I don't think any person wants dumped on them from a stranger, and I didn't reply because I feel like I was rightly weirded out by being approached like this. Especially considering they sent a follow up message sometime later telling me they were upset with me for not helping them through their spiritual crisis and that they would not "forgive me" for it.
I don't know any of you. None of you know me. That was one of the most uncomfortable one-sided interactions I've ever had in any Pagan-adjacent community. I believe in "magick" but this experience showed me that this stuff isn't like... fun and lighthearted for a lot of people and I refuse to be any sort of authority for anyone having any sort of problems in their life who want a spiritual answer to their problems. I started this for fun and seeing all the anxiety strangers brought to me over just how "real" all this was for them was too much for me. I won't say magick isn't real, but I think a lot of you guys need to take a step back and look at your lives more holistically.
I am a stranger running a blog about how picturing cartoon animals while cooking might make your food taste better. It's just that deep.
Anyway I really do appreciate the engagement I've had over the years otherwise. Sometimes I think about coming back and completing some of my "Magickal Properties" posts that are still very popular even now. But idk if I will. That said, if anyone wants to make work derivative of mine feel free to. Anything you use directly from me please credit by linking to this blog. Anything inspired by my work but ultimately containing content originally from your own mind doesn't need to be directly credited unless you feel like giving me a little shout out. There's not a lot on here I'd say I "own" except for the text of my posts as I've written them. As long as you're not copying and pasting my words and claiming them as your own you're probably fine.
Thanks for all your support over the years, even in my absence. I wish you all the best.
(And yes, I did really like Pokémon Legends: Arceus.)
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((rant about something that just happened, long post))
dude the most insane interaction ive ever had in a roleplay just happened-
okay, so i join this roleplay, right? it's a family roleplay. pretty standard stuff, doesn't seem to have started yet.
so I pick a role, then find my room, right? pretty basic, cute pink princess bed with some cute pink heart wall lights and a balcony with a table and chairs- pink, of course. i'm mentioning this because it's important later.
so i hop into the bed for a second to go afk. when i come back, this lady- she's a friend of the roleplay host, so she has 'build', she can change the building and the colors and the furniture and etc. but anyways, this lady just randomly deletes my princess bed and replaces it with a grey one? so i ask her, "hey, why are you changing up my room?" and she's like "idk" which is... a pretty common response in these types of games. so she continues taking all of the stuff down- including just deleting the balcony altogether?? wth??
so i keep pressing her, and she reveals that she's taking all of this stuff down because she thought that I thought it was "too girly."
she didn't even ask for my opinion before she started. she just came in and *decided* that it was too girly for me.
so we argue a bit, her friend comes, she explains to her friend that "i was just tryna help him" (this oc that i was playing used he/they) "and he got mad". w-what? huh?! you didn't even ask for my opinion. you have to ask for these kinds of things, and you didn't. plus, this is my room, not yours, so...?
so- man, i dont even remember the full sequence of what happened next, but ill try to explain:
so they head downstairs, i think to get the host involved or something? i come down there too, i dont want them to warp the story and i know they will, and if i'm there they may listen to me. maybe.
so- i dont remember what exactly led up to this, but i think not long after that the lady lies to her friend and says that I was, like, trying to convince her to let me be her boyfriend? how was this even related to what was going on?? why would you lie about that?? I explain, "uh, no, first of all, this oc is gay, second of all, I did not say that." And she's like [to her friend] "nono he said this out of roleplay!!!!11!!11"
"...uh, no, again, I didn't say that, please don't twist the story. Also i'm aroace so LOL" and her friend's like "hell does aroace mean?" and I have to explain it to her but roblox censors get in the way so i have to reword it :/
so I say, "so... yeah, they [the lady, didn't know her pronouns at the time] lied, aaaand i didn't say any of that boyfriend stuff and I don't know why they would say that?"
so, of course, they respond with: "they?? :skull: [the lady]'s a she"
"oh, okay, thank you for correcting me, noted."
"i have no faith in this generation :skull:"
What. What is this supposed to mean?? I'd wager there's a fair chance you're part of said generation??
and then the host leaves, causing the roleplay to instantly close. :p
sorry for the giant story dump, i just need to get this off of my chest before I forget. I'm quite upset, but mostly I'm just baffled, to be honest. also, sorry if it's a bit confusing and the wording is kinda weird, it's hard to retell events (for me, anyways,) when they just happened and you're scrambling to remember all that just happened.
#also to be fair i didn't specify in roleplay this this oc was gay#but it was still a pretty dumb lie?? like it wasn't even related#to what was going on#what were you trying to accomplish lady#all in all: don't grief other people's rooms without their permission#or at all#please#...it wasn't even 'too girly'#i liked the room! but oh well
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Hi Taylor, hope all is well with you. This is a bit random so please feel free to ignore this if you'd prefer.
Do you have any advice for someone experiencing writer's block? I have so much trouble trying to string a single sentence together. It's gotten that bad and idk, I just felt like asking. Sometimes I feel it's helpful to read about what other writer's think about writing in general. Sometimes I feel seen and sometimes I end up learning something new so I'd love to hear if you've found anything that has been helpful to you when it comes to writing.
First of all no, please send me messages like this all the time!! I also feel like I learn more and really that's what a community is all about. Send questions and thots and music and just whatever your heart desires!
Also, god it really really sucks. I'm sorry you're having trouble even getting a sentence out, believe me, I get it. For me, it's really really different every time it hits. I'm so sorry this is so long, but maybe it'll help you or someone else so I wanted to be thorough! 💛
1. Sometimes, I need to read - read other fanfic, read different books of a variety of genres. This helps spark that 'goddamn I wanna write something that makes people the way I feel when I read this!' inspiring feeling...HOWEVER, for me personally, depending on my mood, this actually backfires and I start getting too in my head about comparison and doubt which ultimately blocks me more (but see note #7 to combat this)
2. Specifically for fanfic writing, I need to return to the source a lot of times! I realize I haven't watched the show in awhile, or if it's my other Fandom, I need to read the original books. Even though we're on Tumblr and we see gifsets and people writing about these characters and art, sometimes we need that original source material to spark something. If you're not writing fanfic and writing something original, this could even be returning to your outline, making a mood board for a specific scene/character/etc. Why did you want to write this story to begin with? Why did you fall in love with it? Why do you want other people to fall in love with it - what do you want them to take away when they finish it?
3. Water, food, change of scenery - it sounds silly and everyone says it, but sometimes your body just can't focus. Drink some water, take a bite of something and even go for a little walk around your house (outside is better for me but whatever works for you!)
4. Share it with someone! I'm super duper stubborn and feel like I have to fix the block myself and honestly sometimes thats just silly. Having someone read it or tossing out ideas with each other really helps! You need a writing community around you - and not just people who will tell you your shit rules (which of course you want to hear, but you need the balance - the people who will tell you what's working and what's not working)
5. Dump it out! Try to just literally throw any and every thought onto a page - whether it's a doc or hand written, a voice note, whatever. Don't worry about timeline and things flowing or making sense. Often times you're blocked on a part because something else is calling to you! Also, and this may be tough to hear - it may make you realize you're blocked because you need to blow up your entire plot. I can't tell you the number of times I was blocked on something because it just wasn't right. No matter how much I loved the scene, it didn't work, it wasn't in the right spot, etc.
6. Brackets!! And Comic Sans! It's silly, but I saw a thing that recommended typing in comic sans when you're blocked and sometimes this works for me? It's something about the font and your brain not taking it seriously? Also brackets. For when you're stuck you just literally type [and then Steve does something hot here but we move on to..] like filling in the part you're stuck on and come back to it.
7. This is my new favorite! I'll link the podcast below - but they're these wonderful women who make this podcast about screenwriting, but I think there is some crazy cool and beneficial advice for anyone wanting to write in general in their episodes.
But anyways, something they discussed has really helped me and that is: naming your doubt. Like literally giving her a name (they called her Miranda in the podcast) and telling Miranda "no sorry, that's not helpful, you don't get a seat at the table right now, we'll get back to you) AND THEN doing this amazing exercise when you're doubting. She uses an example of her student saying "isn't that too soap opreaey?" And so then she makes her student write the scene as soap opreaey as she can. And that ended up taking the pressure off while also pulling out some nuggets that she ended up really liking! Does that make sense? So just write whatever you're doubting to the extreme.They explain it much better in the podcast 😅
8. Going along with #7, find some writers or people you really admire on YouTube or podcasts or a book who are talking about writing! It's amazing how a little video or quick episode of listening to someone talk about writing passionately can spark something in yourself. It reminds you you're not alone but it can also give you a new way to approach something, etc.
9. Lastly, I'll just say, that in order to push past the block, you have to let go - whether that's pressure, doubt, etc. You have to give yourself grace and patience because the more you sit and stare at something that doesn't want to come out, the more frustrated and tight you get and the longer it'll take to come out. There's an interview with Taika Waititi, and I know I'm really butchering what he said, but it was something about even opening a word doc, staring at it and not typing a single thing, and then closing the doc that day, still makes you a writer. There are going to be days where it just doesn't come but that doesn't mean you're not a writer and that it'll never come!
I hope that helps anyone 💛 also here is the link to the podcast in case you're curious 🥰 happy writing!
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for some reason ao3 decided to be rovinphobic today and doesnt let me comment on htbahb properly? so i thought id just paste the comment here :o
when i saw u talking abt this fic on tumblr and when you started uploading the first few chapters, i was so so excited for this story. cant believe i hit a reading slum exactly as you uploaded most of it </3 but! im back now and i immediately went back to binge read this over the last two days, it has been so much fun :D
first of all, yeah the concept is genius obviously. season 8 really dumped the wildest things on all of us and just expected us to be normal abt it huh. really glad somebody picked up the souleating storyline again, it had soo much fun potential and yeah you hit all of it.
the themes?? and narratives?? in this story?? have been driving me insane theyre so good. going from what it means to be human to is this really me if im always wearing a facade to my identity not as a human or watcher but as a hermit sososososososo good.
i have developed all the feeling for the way you portray mumbos and grians relationship like. yeah. yeah they really are that close huh. of course they end up soulmates with the most unfortunate timing possible. of course they do. i dont think ive ever felt as soft as when reading the preening scenes. ALL THE OTHER CHARACTERS TOO THO like skyduo!!!!!!!!! siblinghood is real they invented it. impulse scar everyone!! adored scar taking jellie to the void with him bc ofc. ofc he would.
and the scene with jimmy ooo he really is Your Guy huh. "Jimmy held his secrets so close to his chest that people never even knew he had them" ough ough ough ough ough my man my boy my lad. i think having read the listerner!jimmy fic before that also added soso much.
grian really saw the dream smp and said no thank u <3 and i think that was very correct of him
BUT YEAH overall? amazing writing epic characterizations so many little lines that made me stop and just rethink how i think abt these characters haha. i am afraid i must plagiarize all of your ideas in my brian 😔 ur watcher concepts are simply too good to not be canon
I HOPE U HAVE A GREAT TIME WRITING THE SEQUEL I CANT WAIT TO SEE IT
ROVINNNN MY ABSOLUTE BELOVED <3333333 first things first thank you so much for this ask i have read it over and over and i love it <333 also i would have replied to it the day you sent it but you send it like. just a few hours before i got on a plane to go to canada so i ended up a Bit Distracted and did not answer so so sorry
IM SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE THEMES!!! i go a bit insane everytime anyone comments on them because it is by far my favorite thing that i did with the fic, which was explore that concept of humanity/inhumanity/self-identity.
mumbo and grian's relationship...they make me ill! they make me ill. it's like...idk as much as LOVE desert duo, when it comes to my own writing i seem to just write mumbo and grian over and over again. they're just so. yeah. <3 im glad you like the preening scenes there will likely be more of them. it's just such an easily intimate type of scene you know? and the fact that grian up until this point has most done it alone (minus pearl helping sometimes), which is pretty uncomfortable and tedius when he can't easily reach his own back. and im so glad you appreciate scar taking jellie into the void he would never abandon her <3 it was one of my fave funny/lighthearted parts of the series
SLDFKJSLFJSFKFSF YEAH. YEAH JIMMY IS MY GUY. in a fic about grian and mumbo i manage to still insert jimmy solidarity brainrot into it. he'll be in the sequel too--not in any major role but i promise you he will There at some point because empires minorly factors into it. I'M SO GLAD THAT YOU LOVED THAT LINE. i know that i say every line someone quotes is my favorite but that might actually be one of my favorites in the whole fic. the Lonesome Dreams backstory for jimmy was in the works for a long time before I ever wrote the fic, since i came up with that before i even came up with htbahb. so I absolutely intended everything from that fic to be implicated in that line <3 also you're right, i think lonesome dreams does add to it. i may or may not put it in the series, but lonesome dreams is also planned to work with other series as well, so idk
AND YESSS THE DSMP REFERENCE i had a lot of fun with it. i chose blue and gold for the door because it reminded me of l'manberg uniforms and was less obvious than green for dream. i also like my other slight dsmp-adjacent throwaway in mcc too, where when mumbo joins the server tommy comments in chat about seeing him as a father figure (mcc19 does take place after that one collab video...just sayin')
thank you for this review i loved every second of reading it <3333 i hereby give u and other authors permission to take my headcanons and ideas. if u like directly copy/reference a bunch of things, i'd like a shoutout but otherwise i dont care because i dont own ideas and anything anyone writes is likely to be different anyway because it's their brain you know? so def feel free to use anything here <3
i am having a great time writing the sequel!! i actually have an update (not...chapter update. status update) to post no it later this week :eyes: because i finally reached a point where i can make proper progress on it. aka i was able to work out a lot of details and planning and am in the midst of writing it as fast as i can
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