Tumgik
#i'd love to chat with people who have different ideas too!
jinnie-ret · 8 months
Text
destined at the VMAs
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
stray kids x musician!reader (platonic)
genre: fluff
content warnings: none.
word count: 1.7k
summary: a musician under the name CLOVER is starstruck when she meets her favourite group Stray Kids at the VMAs, only to find that they're big fans of her too
This imagine is written in first person under the name of an artist called CLOVER.
As voted for by you! Make sure follow to have a say in regular polls for what I'll post next!
Or if you have any ideas you want to see them you can send in asks!
Hope you enjoy!
MAIN MASTERLIST
Tumblr media
"Okay guys, I'm really excited right now because we have the one and only CLOVER, all the way from the UK and making her debut American television appearance here at the VMAs!" an interviewer for Entertainment Tonight introduced me to the camera whilst other celebrities arrived and walked the pink carpet.
"Hi!" I greeted her politely and waved at the camera. I felt so excited to be here at the VMAs, my first time in America and it was on such a well known awards show, I couldn't believe it. I hoped my fans liked my bold type of outfit too, a beautiful black gown with a daring slit up the side where it rested against my thigh.
"Welcome to the US, CLOVER! We're so happy to have you here, how are you finding it?" the interviewer asked me, holding the mic out.
"It's big. America is so much bigger than I expected it to be, especially compared to back home," I said with wide eyes, wearing a shocked expression on face which made the woman opposite me laugh.
"That's right, you've come all the way over here from England, right? How excited are you to perform here?" she asked me.
"I'm incredibly nervous, if I'm honest haha. There's so much talent here so I just hope that people will enjoy what I bring too," I smile, wiping my hands down on my dress awkwardly. I really hoped the camera didn't somehow pick up the sight of my sweaty palms.
"Well I've seen some of your performances before and let me just say, I'm a big fan myself!" she confessed, which made me heart feel warm.
"Wow thank you so much!" I blushed, hands clasped together now. I really couldn't stop fidgeting with them.
"I mean, you've been nominated for best new artist! That must feel amazing right?" she smiled at me.
"It really does, to be nominated for an award, let alone perform here is just beyond my imagination. Like Ice Spice, Peso Pluma, Pink Pantheress my UK sister is nominated too! It's crazy!" I exclaim, hoping I'd meet my fellow UK artist too, not realising that later on I'd meet a different honorary British artist.
"Speaking of, is there anyone else you're excited to see here today?" the interviewer leaned towards me, like she was ready for any gossip.
"Wow, pretty much everyone!" I laughed, "but I'd have to say Demi for sure! I'm excited to see them perform I've loved their music for years! Also Maneskin and there's Stray Kids and TXT too! I'm so excited for Stray Kids oh my god..." I ramble, waving my hands in the air as I talk excitedly, unable to hide my big smile.
"Stray Kids certainly seem to be stealing everyone's hearts this year, I spoke to them earlier, and... wow," the interviewer laughed with me, and it felt like having a conversation with a friend at that point.
"I don't blame you haha," I giggled.
"Well, thank you so much for chatting with us, CLOVER, we'll see you out there later tonight, best of luck!" she smiled at me before turning to the camera and ending the interview. I waved bye to her and the camera and walked round the corner, heading backstage with my manager and taking a deep breath in.
It all felt so surreal, I was sure I caught a glance of Taylor Swift and waved and smiled at her, shocked to have gotten the same actions returned and squealed, unable to help myself as I jumped around and bumped into someone behind me.
"I'm so sorry!"
"Oh my god sorry!"
We both apologised at the same time. And when I turned around to see who it was I thought I was going to spontaneously combust right there and then.
It was Felix of Stray Kids.
"Felix?!"
"CLOVER?!"
What. The. He knew who I was?
"Oh, you know Stray Kids?" he asked me shocked, an adorable expression on his face as he helped me rebalance myself, I was wearing heels after all.
"I should be asking you the same question, I've been listening to you guys for years!" I gushed, probably embarrassing myself a bit but Felix didn't seem to react to that, seeming to get excited himself.
"You have? Wow... Stray Kids are such huge fans of your music, we really love your songs," Felix happily explained to me, still holding onto my hands as he waved them excitedly.
"No way... that's insane!" I couldn't put everything I was thinking into words.
"Tell me about it," he laughed, pulling his hands away to scratch the back of his neck.
"Felix!" the other members walked over, not noticing me at first, which was lucky otherwise they would have seen me looking at them like they were ghosts.
"We've been looking everywhere for you!" Bang Chan patted his shoulders, speaking in Korean and then turned to see me, a shocked expression painting his face.
"Sorry I didn't mean to be keeping Felix," I then spoke back in Korean, some of the members seeming to jump back in shock at hearing their native language.
"Woah, CLOVER?! Wait, you speak Korean?!" Han bounced on his feet, beaming at me.
"Yeah my best friend is Korean so I ended up learning it, definitely helped when watching you guys. This is just like a dream, I can't tell you how amazing it is to meet you guys!" I felt myself getting almost hyper by seeing them in front of me.
"We could say the same to you! We're all big fans of you!" Changbin stepped up, whilst some of the other members stood back nervously.
"If I'm being honest I didn't believe Felix when he told me that," I shook my head in disbelief.
"Well believe it now," Seungmin laughed, seeming to feel more comfortable now.
"I'm so hyped to see you guys perform tonight! How are you feeling?" I asked them, feeling more confident now as the ice had been broken.
"I think we're nervous but we're going to do our best out there," Lee Know shyly admitted.
"We could do with some words of encouragement, could you say Stray Kids hwaiting?" Han asked cheekily.
"Han we've just met her, don't scare her away," Hyunjin did his iconic laugh.
"It's fine, it's fine haha. Stray Kids hwaiting!!!" I cheered for them and they all clapped for me after, making me blush and hide my face.
"Your Korean is really good," Jeongin commented.
"Thank you, well, like I said, it's all thanks to my friend. She's so cute, she'd cheer me on before every gig I used to do like, CLOVER hwaiting!!" I share, hoping they wouldn't find it weird how I'm rambling on.
"Hahaha, that's cute, is she a stay too?" Bang Chan asked hopefully.
"Oh, big time! She's the reason I got to know your music and watch your variety stuff too," I nod back at him. They all let out sounds of amazement.
"You watch our other stuff?" Changbin asked shocked.
"Yeah! I'm a big fan of SKZ Code!" I admit sheepishly.
"Wow that's a good friend you got there," Seungmin nods, smirking.
"She's the best, she's supported me through my music the whole time," I grin, thinking about my best friend. I wish she could have come to America with me but she was too busy.
"Are you planning on releasing any new music soon?" Felix asks me.
"Well, I'll let you in on a secret, I'm working on some right now!" I fake whisper to them, but it didn't really matter. I was speaking to them in Korean at this point so it wasn't very likely anyone backstage would expose the fact.
"You are? Wow I'm looking forward to it already, you have such a unique sound," Han praises my music, making me a hold a hand over my heart.
"Wow that honestly means a lot coming from you guys. You have such a unique sound too and it inspired me to go with the direction I really wanted to in my music," I compliment them, seeing their eyes light up.
"Thank you! Have you ever thought of collabing with another artist?" Changbin asks, seeming to be hinting at something as Minho pats his shoulder warningly.
"Well, now that you've brought it up, I've always wanted to make some songs with you guys," I confess shyly, blushing even more when they all ask 'really'?!
"That would be amazing, I think we could create something great together," Bang Chan nods, a more professional tone as he thinks about their music.
"Perfect! Well I have to go now, but I could get our managers to exchange numbers?" I say, realising I should be getting ready to find my seat.
"We'd love that!" Felix claps his hands together happily.
"Great! Well it was lovely to meet you guys!" I wave as I start to walk away, before I turn snack around quickly and call over to them, "oh, by the way Han, thanks for representing us British Stays, your accent is the best," I daringly tease, giggling to myself as I walk away.
I felt like I was on cloud nine. I met my favourite people in the world... and we were going to try and collab together. It really doesn't get better than this.
Except it does.
For my performance I had changed into a beautiful green dress to match the nature filled scene behind me, performing one of my songs called 'Salvia'. It was a reassuring song to comfort a partner, before the scene behind me started showing dying flowers as I transitioned into a song called 'Rotten to the Core', the pure opposite of the first song. As I ended the performance I saw Stray Kids up and applauding for me, and I smiled and nodded in their direction.
Then I saw them perform too. And the remix they did blew my mind. I was so happy they were getting recognition from other artists too, who may not have seen them before. And I returned my admiration for their performance as I gave a standing ovation of my own, seeing them look my way too.
It all felt like a dream. The future was really looking up, especially with a collaboration with my favourite people in the midst of it all.
638 notes · View notes
copperbadge · 1 month
Note
RE watching thoughts: I’m not 100% sure, but it might be that the whole “I am not my thoughts” is about engaging and identifying with your metacognition MORE than your initial thoughts. Because I get where you’re coming from - what is a consciousness but a collection of thoughts and feelings? But you can also have thoughts about your own thoughts that are more useful for dealing with whatever situation you’re in, I guess. (Random aside - every time I start thinking about thinking about thinking my brain inevitably starts thinking about Tiffany Aching and The Wee Free Men.)
I really should have replied to this ask sooner because it's going to seem like a non-sequitur now (this was sent much earlier in March) but I'm kind of glad I didn't, because I've been chatting with people about this and I think I understand more why there's an emphasis in some therapies on the idea that we are not our thoughts.
(I uh, haven't read the Tiffany books so I'm not much help there.)
I am coming to understand that many, perhaps most, people judge themselves, comprehensively and harshly, based on their thoughts. Perhaps it's just a lot of people who struggle with mental health, but given the commonality of the sentiment I don't know if I'd confine it that tightly; generally it appears that people cannot conceive of themselves as anything other than a binary of good or bad. So many people I've talked to about this portion of DBT, the watching-questioning-identifying thoughts portion, say that it helps to snap them out of a spiral of "I'm a horrible person, I deserve to suffer/die, I can never be redeemed" after they've failed at something, or had a negative thought, or reacted poorly to an unexpected event.
That is not something I've ever experienced. I mean, jokingly maybe, but not in a real, internal sense.
And that's not to brag -- I'm not saying I think I'm a good person, either, because I don't think I'm a good person. I don't conceive of myself in terms of good or bad. I never cuddle my cats and think "I'm such a good cat dad" or forget to feed them and think "I should die now." I have a perpetual morally neutral attitude towards my own existence; my thoughts and actions might trend me one direction or another but I'm aware of the temporary nature of that. If I fuck up I'll worry about who I might have hurt or whether I'll be fired or what's going to happen as a consequence, if I am polite to someone who didn't deserve it I know I was acting kindly in the moment, but I don't make an inherent moral judgement of myself based on that. And it seems like the vast majority of people do. Which you would think would make me feel pretty good about myself, but honestly...I don't know.
A lot of people I know who have ADHD or are Autistic have talked about seeing themselves as other, as alien -- like that one webcomic artist who draws themself with little antennae to indicate they're strange and different. I've always understood why one might do that, but I never felt that way myself, before or after the diagnosis. After all, let's remember, I was The Normal* Child of my siblings, and if I was The Normal One before the diagnosis, why wouldn't I remain Mostly Normal after?
* As ever, I'm using "normal" as a cultural term, to indicate what we think of as mainstream, not because normal is a thing that really exists.
My life has been relatively solitary -- I have friends and family and I love them but I'm rarely part of a large group, I don't spend a lot of time out in public interacting with people, I'm not a big socializer. Before the Adderall, I really couldn't be, I took too much psychic damage from interpersonal interaction, so I chose those very carefully. And now my DBT class has been a rare moment when I'm encountering contradictions to a lot of my assumptions about the way human beings in our society interact, react, and behave. I just...don't fit that mold very well. I think of it as having crossed wiring, not in the sense that I'm faulty but just in the sense that I'm very, very different. Not Normal. It's not exactly a bad feeling but it's certainly not a great one, internalizing the sensation of alienness.
DBT is proving to be a mixed bag but not in the way I or my therapist intended -- it seems to be either things I was already instinctively doing or things that simply do not apply to me. In one way it's disappointing because it means there isn't much help to be had (we're a little over halfway through the course and I keep thinking "Maybe next class will be useful") but on the other hand it's validating that so much of what I came up with myself as unconscious coping mechanisms is literally what I would have been told to do anyway.
Sometimes it's a combination of both, though, which really blows. I guess most people, if they reframe another person's actions, actually find emotional relief in that, and I don't. An example from the class is that if someone is rude to you, you can consider how they might be having a hard day, and be polite in return; that's great, in terms of defusing a situation, and it's something I do a fair amount of. But apparently it's also something that for most people results in feeling less awful about the interaction, and that's not the case for me. Which is why so much of DBT feels to me like lying to oneself. It's not lying for most people.
So, yeah. I'm going to finish out the course and keep trying things with the therapist but I suspect given everything, I might already be at "as good as it gets" in terms of emotional work. Which isn't the worst thing in the world, and there is still the option to try medication that could help, but I think there will come a point where I'm going to have to deal with the fallout of just how different I am, and how that has impacted my life. Might end up a good thing; something I've really been trying to resolve is unhappiness over being unpartnered and highly likely to remain that way, and at least if this provides a better understanding of why, then perhaps I can process that and put it to rest in a way I've been trying to do but not succeeding well at.
So, we'll see. But I find it both fascinating and kind of horrifying how many people can believe they are irredeemably bad, even if the belief is only temporary, simply because they had an uncharitable thought or impulse. It makes me somewhat grateful for the crossed wires, at least.
167 notes · View notes
guillotinna · 1 year
Text
I keep seeing these Gen z is task force 141 and I wanna join
Anytime you use a computer, you do that stupid movie hacker trope of exaggerated typing and say "I'm in"
Saying "POV" in front of sentences
In the group chat saying "1 like and I'll kms", liking your own message and then saying "damn guess I gotta"
I see a lot of these posts were Gaz and Soap would understand y/n....bffr, no those geezers would not
No one knows what the gen z kid is saying they just know it's probably not good
"You're telling me a shrimp fried this rice?"
You have a small photo you keep tucked in your chest pocket and after enough times seeing you looking lovingly at it, one of the guys asks who it is. Is it a s/o from back home? 😏😏
You say no and pull out a photo card of your fave singer and they're like ??? Really
One time during a particularly physical scuffle with the enemy, you get thrown to the ground and huff out "one hop this time" only to promptly tackle tf outta your assailant while saying "take it back now yall"
Reads everyone's zodiac charts except ghost bc he won't tell his birthday let alone the time he was born so you just make one up
Price calls a 6 am meeting to which you say "double it and give to the next person"
*Alexa, play teenagers by MCR*
If you had time describe the base, you'd say it smells like ball sweat, blood and war crimes which everyone took offense to for different reasons
Would absolutely get soaps doodles tattooed
Actually speaking of which, imagine getting caught giving yourself stick and pokes with a pen and being banned from using pens period
You'd be in a meeting with a #2 pencil
Ofc a gen z member would be absolutely feral which very little regard for their own safety much to the dismay of the others
Quoting "Oh these aren't homemade, they were made in a factory....a bomb factory......they're bombs." All the time around soap even though he has no idea what you're talking about
You don't spent too much alone time with ghost bc he likes quiet and you can't be alone with your thoughts which is why you lean more towards spending time with soap or gaz
I just like puns so I'm gonna add this but gen z love borgs (a customized gallon jug of alcohol that is usually given a name) and yours is appropriately named taskforce 1-borg-1
this is mainly for my americans but i know pretty much the whole world got beef with engl*nd: before you met Soap, you thought the entire 141 was en*lish so when you finally did meet him, you said "oh thank god" with a sigh
americans 🤝 scotts
making fun of english "people"
"Pull up in the monster, automobile gangsta With a bad bitch that came fr-" "....sergeant, comms off please"
you show Ghost WAP and he has to take a walk
*price yelling at gaz and soap*: KYLE GARRICK AND JOHN MACTAVISH GET IN HERE- Y/n: oop not the government name
Another for my US baddies: if your'e ever arguing with any of the guys, the nail in the coffin would be "and it's called soccer"
"one more like and i'll-" "enough!"
you call Price "ms. girl" and he could not be more confused
someone asks "do you serve?" and u reply "yah, serve cunt"
when asked why you decided to join the military you said something like: "well i didnt think i'd live past 18 so when I did, i ended up here".....crickets from the rest of the team
"good thing we only have showers on base because i would have already taken a toaster bath by now"
ask Gaz "no bitches?🤨" one more time see what happens
price: the enemies have taken civvies hostage and blocked off all exits and entrances to the town-" y/n: "omg tea"
Also calling price "capt. Save-a-hoe"....I wanna be saaaavvveddd ;)
If you took a shot every time you said "rest in peace to all the soldiers that died in the service, I dive in her cervix", you'd be dead lmao
When asked if they like the military they'd say "it was either this or the psych ward so yah, I'll take it"
Quoting MPGIS constantly and no one even sort of knows what that is ("Crack. Is that what you smoke? You smoke crack?")
Some detainee being interrogated is spilling some nonsense, so you hit them with "oh brother this guy stinks!" And then with the butt of your gun
"Little bad trini bitch but she mixed with China, real thick vagina, smuggle bricks to-" "SARGENT ENOUGH"
Falling asleep on team mates (minus ghost's) shoulders mostly because the most peace they get is when you're unconscious
*when y/n hears any slightly suggestive/dirty phrase*: what are we talking about 😏 (iykyk)
Same energy as: " born next to a nuclear power plant, has an IQ of 2 and was hit in the head with several Rocks as a child"
Vine quotes out the wazoo, it's just awful for the rest of the team lmao
Replying to everything with "on god?"
soap: "what are you 6?" y/n: "yah 6 inches deep in your mom".....you did not walk away from that unscathed to say the least...worth it tho
1K notes · View notes
neoarchipelago · 1 year
Text
Madripoor High (Part 1)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
A/N: ok so hum... First part of something new... I have no idea for a title so please throw some ideas in the comments... Yes i have added a little hint of marvel but it is not in the marvel universe! I just love Madripoor. I kinda have the tittle 'Madripoor High' in mind but I'm not sure... Don't even know if I'll keep this going just... Let me know in the comments. Also edited this on my phone... Kinda sucky, I'll put it back correctly if I do keep it going.
Warnings: sexual talk, weapons etc.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Cars passing by and people walking to their destinations. The busy city boomed around you, muffled by the headphones on your head. Your music blocked the chaos of London. You enjoyed London. You found it beautiful. Amongst all the countries you've been to… and that list was quite long, you enjoyed the weather. Exactly. The gloomy, rainy weather. The black umbrella shielding you from the crystal droplets as you walked to a small cafe. You were greeted as you entered, dropping your shield at the entrance before taking place at a table in a corner far from others.
Your coat was removed, your backpack opened to free your laptop. The nice waitress walked to you after several minutes, asking for your order.
"I'd like a hazelnut cappuccino and… the crumble please" you answered with a smile.
As she walked away you looked around, the almost empty cafe was quiet, the few people chatting or working. You smirked, turning to your laptop you went to check for your payment. You smiled as you watched the enormous figure in your credit account. Yes. Credit. Because in the underground, money is important, but credits… Those are so much more valuable. The Madripoor currency.
Sighing, you let yourself lean back on the sofa chair, crossing your arms. You were proud. After everything you've gone through, you have managed to become one of the most prized citizens of Madripoor. The hard work you've put in has paid off, the contracts have piled up, the price tag always climbing up. Your speciality? Tracking. To get into details, it was hacking. Now you mostly used it to track down targets for big mean people who always have something against another big mean one. You were good. You were the fucking best. So yes. You were proud, even if you had no one to be proud of you.
Cup placed in front of you, you were taken out of your daydream. You smiled up, thanking the waitress, closing your laptop and pushing it to the side to bring your little treats closer to you. Contract over, now you were free until you accepted the next one. It would fall quite fast, yes, but you thought you might get some rest. Go back to Madripoor, to Hightown, and rest.
You took a bite of the crumble, feeling the sweetness of it making you relax. You thought you might go shopping once you'd got back. Maybe you'd stay in and play, watch some movies. Maybe you'd go to Downtown…
A soft buzz captured your attention. You grabbed your phone, looking at the screen. Someone was calling. No one called. Very few… barely anyone had this number. It was used for emergencies only and it had been a year and half since it rang. You frowned. It foreshadowed something entirely different than a break. You sighed. Curiosity eating at you. Before it was too late you answered.
"Hello?"
"Tracker."
You frowned. A woman's voice. A woman who knew your screen name. Only people from Madripoor knew it. Or people extremely close to Madripoor.
"Be quick." You said.
"You were never patient muñeca."
Muñeca. Doll. In Spanish. You sighed, closing your eyes.
"Valeria, you fucking bitch, I thought you were in jail."
"I was. I got out. Then that cabron de Alejandro trapped me."
You smirked. Alejandro. You haven't met the man, but by the amount of times she had complained about him, it's like you knew him already. A little voice was heard behind her, notifying you that she wasn't alone in that call.
"Where are you calling me from?"
"A military base. I need your help."
"No."
"You didn't listen."
"Go on I'm listening."
"We need help to find-"
"No."
She sighed. Helping her? It was already risky. You could. You could get her out and free her but she'd get herself into trouble again. Helping the military? You? Tangled in the deepest roots of criminality? It was the stupidest thing to ask of you.
"Come on. You love a challenge. And I have one just for you."
"It doesn't matter if I love a challenge. You're on high speaker aren't you?"
"Well-"
"Of course you are. They wouldn't let you call anyone without supervision. They know who I am? They know what I do?"
"They do." She said, a hint of amusement in her voice.
"So what's going to happen? I help and then what? They got pretty little pink handcuffs for me?"
"Well you can ask the skull face to put them on. Or the ADHD Scot." She answered even more amusedly.
"Valeria… what?" You asked confused.
"Come on. It'll be very interesting. I know you're curious. And this… is like tracking a sin cara."
"A no face?"
Damn. She might succeed to make you interested. But she might be bluffing as well.
"Yes. We need to find Echo."
"Echo? The scientist working for various cartel's and Mafia bosses? The man that no one has ever met or even seen?" You asked, irony dripping from your tongue.
"Are you skeptical?"
"Echo doesn't exist. It's a stupid invention from some idiots to sell products at a higher price. You're wasting my time. Goodbye and good luck Valeria" You rolled your eyes.
"I have proof."
You froze. Proof? Now curiosity prickled your skin. What kind of proof? How did they get it?
"Hello?"
"Shut up. I'm thinking."
She chuckled on the other side.
"We've heard that your work is based on contracts. We'd like to offer you a contract." A voice rang.
The raspy voice was soft but commanding. A man, probably in his 40's. He sounded calm, determined.
"And who might you be?" You asked, taking a sip of your cappuccino who was growing cold.
"I'm Captain John Price."
A captain. Fair enough.
"What kind of contract?"
"You help us, we find Echo, we neutralize him and get Intel. You get immunity on this mission and after your part is done, you have 24 hours to vanish."
You thought about the question. Finding Echo. Might be the golden contract for you. Not that you needed it. But this… this was a challenge. Not the boring easy tracks that you had to do. You knew how even the high table of Madripoor was starting to get annoyed about this intriguing character. Countering rules in Hightown and Downtown. This might be an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone. You looked around you, at the calm cafe. Fuck… you might not get that break after all. You closed your eyes, preparing yourself to accept a deal you might regret.
"48 hours. Full immunity from the moment I step into your base until the end of the contract. I do things my way. You get your guy, your Intel. That's it. I'm not getting in the middle of the cartel's and other big brainless gorillas." You stated.
"Fine." You heard after a few pending seconds.
"Alright. I'll think about it." You finished.
"Didn't you just agree?" Another voice rang.
This time it was more… alive. The Scottish accent meant it was one of the men Valeria had mentioned.
"I'll agree when you'll receive the contract. I have to check something before I agree. I'll contact you and travel to you. Don't worry, you'll get an answer in the next few hours." You explained, opening your laptop.
"Should we send you a location? An email?" Another voice again. British accent but cute voice.
"No. I know where you are. I know how to contact you. I'll do so when the time's come."
"How?" The Scottish voice echoed in your ear.
"Oh… she'll have no problem with it." Valeria answered.
"See you soon." You concluded, hanging up.
Entering the base was easy. The new recruits keeping the gates were easily distracted. You infiltrated the base, making sure to deviate the cameras and stealing a 'visitor' badge.
You walked around, white wool shirt, black shorts with tights. Thigh high socks over your tights and comfy running shoes. Your black backpack and phone in hand. Sometimes, the best way to hide is to get attention… especially from men. You'd feel the looks, the way they were directed to your thick thighs, or neck, in plain view as you had pulled your hair back.
You were chubby, not exactly thin, tummy showing and chubby cheeks. At least, that was what was usually romanticized, the thighs, ass and boobs being overly sexualized. You wanted to roll your eyes. But eventually sometimes, men or women easily fall for it.
You took your time to walk around, discovering the grounds, the badge often being watched by what seemed to be higher ups. You'd fain innocence and bat your lashes when getting caught in places you shouldn't be, before letting them turn their backs and walking straight to where you wanted to. You weren't exactly wanting to be hidden right now. You were good at it. Hiding. But right now you wanted to explore.
The contract had been sent, signed and sent. You had gotten a chance to engage with the high table who agreed to such a contract. You didn't really need their approval. But you didn't want your place in Madripoor to be compromised by working with 'the good guys'. Not only did the high table saw no problem in it but they greatly appreciated you going after Echo. You were right, the character was definitely getting on their nerves, the echoes of him creating some ruckus in downtown.
You walked around a huge warehouse, military gear sprawled around. Most were used for training. You heard some noise not too far, deciding to hide behind big wooden shipping boxes. Voices echoed through the big place. You tried not to look too much. If you can see them, they can see you. You'd rather use your other senses to localize them. You only took one glance at two men standing back to you near a table full of items. One was overly talking while the other one rummaged through what seemed to be his gear bag. The man talking had a mohawk. It made you smile. The other one… was obviously wearing something over his head, but with their backs turned to you, you couldn't make out any more details.
The light reflected into the shinny blade of a combat knife. You blinked, almost hypnotized by it. You wanted it. The two men walked away, still babbling. You waited a few minutes before stepping out of your hiding place, going straight for the bag. You opened it, looking through the different things, looking for the pretty black mat combat knife. You almost jumped in place when you found it, taking the thingy with you before skipping back to your little exploration. This time, in a much more concealed way.
You watched, you spied. You wanted to understand how the base worked before letting yourself meet your contractors. Above the training ground, higher up in some kind of level that was used to put away all the training mats and other training things. It was the perfect spot to look over the training grounds, inside of the warehouse. You watched the men fight each other. It was almost entertaining. Your eyes caught the mohawk boy again, teasing another man. The boy with a cap seemed to joyfully indulge in whatever he was saying.
They looked next to them, a big figure stepping into view. You frowned. The man's face was veiled with a mask, a skull… it wasn't printed. Was it a real skull? You put two and two together, now realizing this was the owner of the combat knife. You chuckled to yourself. As he stopped into the training ring, young recruits palling, your interest peaked.
Thirsty minutes passed by in a flash. You watched in amusement and almost in awe how the mountain of a man threw around the soldiers. He was strong. Fast. You could hear him scold every wrong move of the poor soldiers who faced him. He seemed to look around swiftly every time he had a break.
You stretched, feeling your limbs getting sore from sitting here watching the show. You blinked, watching down again, telling yourself that you should get going.
Eyes. Dark eyes. Looking straight at you. Your breath caught in your throat, a cold wave running through you. His gaze was cold looking up through the mask. You immediately rushed back behind something to hide. How? How?! You wore nothing shiny. You made sure that nothing could reflect light. You were hiding perfectly. How?!
You wanted to take another glance but it was too dangerous. You decided to get moving, your position now compromised. You hopped around to reach ground level. You skipped your way into an empty part of the warehouse. You remained as silent as possible, making sure that even your steps were inaudible. After twenty long minutes you allowed yourself to breathe. Maybe he hadn't seen you in the darkness and you were fine. It had been three hours that you were on base, and you were getting slightly hungry. Perhaps you'd get a snack before finally meeting the contractors.
You looked around, trying to figure which way out could lead you to a building where there was food. The empty warehouse only seemed to echo the voices of soldiers outside, barely audible and muffled. You grabbed your phone, walking towards a back door. Maybe you'd get off base to eat and then come back. You were craving pizza, perhaps-
You slammed against a wall. Not exactly a wall. A wall of a man. You looked up. Eyes falling into a skull mask. Shit. Something told you. That playing innocent. Batting your lashes, won't help with this one. You took a step back, his brows furrowing. You both froze for a split second, tension giving you goosebumps before you reacted the only way your brain could at the moment. You ran.
Throughout the warehouse, jumping over gear, boxes and other stuff that you didn't mind to look at. Why were you running? You were supposed to have immunity. But he didn't know who you were. Not yet. The sound of his heavy boots was the only thing you could hear. Shit the man was swift. He was fast and nimble. You parkoured your way to the back door, almost reaching it until you were tackled against a wall. The shock made you wince, cursing out. You were stuck. Stuck in between a wall, and a strong body. Unfortunately you had both run to a dark corner of the warehouse. You could barely see his eyes in the darkness. You were panting.
He shared your gaze. Eyes never leaving yours. The darkness of them made you shiver. It was odd. That tingly feeling all over you. You barely realized how your wrists were pinned above your head, in his large hand. Didn't even notice his other hand… around your throat. He wasn't applying pressure. He was securing you in place, warning you. You were trapped. You have been trapped very often at the beginning of your… career. However, it had never made you feel like this. Small. Hunted. Like a prey under the claws of a predator. There was no ego, no dumb boy trying to prove something. He had chased you down on instinct, caught you in a primal way. Honestly. It was hot. Thrilling.
"Who are you?" His deep voice said.
Shit… even his voice was hot. Putting your new kink aside, you frowned, gaining back some composure.
"Santa Claus." You let out ironically.
The hand around your throat squeezed menacingly. You gasped. He remained silent awaiting your new answer.
"I.. I'm a visitor." You tried, maybe the innocent act would work.
He pulled on your wrists, having you on your toes now. A last warning.
"T..tracker…" you mumbled.
He seemed in thought for a few seconds before releasing the pressure on your neck and wrists, but keeping them in his hold.
"How did you get in?" He questioned.
Ah yes… the usual interrogation.
"The young boys at the entrance are easily distracted…" you mumbled again.
You weren't pissed. You weren't exactly pouting… maybe a bit. You weren't expecting to be caught, or to be put in your place. You weren't expecting to be under someone's hold like this. You looked away.
"You armed?" He asked.
"I have my phone. It's the only weapon I need." You said, keeping the combat knife a little secret. Mostly because you wanted to keep it and he won't let you. He straightened himself, towering over you.
"I'm going to let you go. You better behave." He warned.
God.. you wanted to brat. You wanted to anger him and test him. You rolled your eyes at him, as the hand holding your wrists released. However the other remained on your throat. You frowned looking up at him, as your hands wrapped around his wrist. He stepped closer to you, eyes never leaving yours. Now what was he doing? He said he was letting you go…
Eyes widening, you felt the other hand roam your waist. You tried to push him away but he squeezed at your throat keeping you in place, your hands flying to his chest to fist in shirt. The hand traveled to your sides, down your back, then back to your side to finally reach your thighs.
"S..stop!" You let out, blushing.
"Breathe… I'm checking for weapons." He said in a chuckle.
He frowned, his hand meeting the handle of… shit. The combat knife was tucked into the back of your shorts, hidden by your shirt. You closed your eyes as he pulled it out.
"No weapons huh? You're already-" he stopped looking at the handle. "That's my fucking knife. You stole it?"
"I borrowed it. Sharing is caring right? We're on the same team…" you answered with a smile.
He put away his knife before spinning you around, bringing your back to his chest. How the hell did he move so fast?! How did he manage to pin your wrists behind you… and HANDCUFF YOU?
"Hey! Where's my immunity?" You complained.
"I'm not arresting you."
"You're handcuffing me to satisfy a kink?" You teased him in a bitter tone.
"I'm keeping you from stealing again. And I'm taking you to Price."
"Who?"
No answer, he simply pulled you forward, holding your wrists behind your back. Well. Wasn't this the perfect start to a contract?
518 notes · View notes
brucewaynehater101 · 10 days
Note
I want Duke included in batfam family fics. being the older sibling Damian needs, relatable yet guiding. Tim being ‘Dukes robin’ and having lots of respect for Tim yet he’d also steal his slice of pie. Duke and Jason hanging out, and Jason appreciating how he never tries to lecture him. Duke and dick matching vibes (or as much as they can) when on patrol and somewhat in the family, and both trying to make their brothers calm tf down. Bruce trying desperately to not fuck up with Duke like he did his other sons, only serving to confuse and slightly alarm Duke. Alfred and duke being the only ones with more then *1* braincell.
he also has so much potential for angst of being a meta in a family everyone thinks hates metas, and people somehow forget him???
(I have more just don’t have the energy to write it all down)
Heck yes! I agree that Duke needs to be included in more batfam fics (and especially as a more pivotal role). I personally try to add him a bit, but I fear I do not include him enough as a key member of the batfam.
Duke is hella important and should be treated as such. I'd love to see more fics with him pissing off GCPD for fun. Just chaos and pranks against GCPD, rogues, Batman, and the Batkids. Also, he should he allowed to punch (or kick) as many JL members as he pleases (Hal was just the first).
Duke and Dick having similar fashion ideas is a cute idea I've seen in the fandom. I would also just love to see more fanart of Duke rocking some fun outfits for galas (especially if the galas follow the AU of Gotham being super weird with their social norms). Duke being featured on magazine covers, being asked to model, and being interviewed would be cool fanwork ideas to play around with. I've seen so many of the other batboys and none with Duke as a magazine cover.
Here's my ideas on how Duke could interact with different batfam members. Feel free to reblog if you have ideas yourself or think the dynamic should be different.
I feel like Duke and Cass would get along really well as chaos gremlins who get away with their shenanigans. Messing with Commissioner Gordon is a favorite pass time of theirs. For some reason, even when presented with evidence, Bruce doesn't believe that Duke and Cass would do the things they get away with. It's both impressive and annoying to the other batkids.
Duke could have a weird relationship with Tim. On one hand, Tim is Duke's Robin. The cases he's solved, feats he's accomplished, and respect Gotham has for Tim's Robin in general (for being Batman's therapy kid) are unfathomable. On the other hand, he's seen Tim walk into the same wall four times within three minutes. They both share a love for riddles, but Tim can be an idiot at interpersonal relationships.
For Damian, Duke has seen how the world picks up kids and spits them out. He's seen kids lashing out, how they merely want to defend themselves, and how fantastic they are once you get to know them. He's been angry and spiteful at the world too. For Damian, Duke's hella impressed at the kid's heart despite all the shit he's been dealt. Duke would encourage chaos, talk with the kid about how different emotions have impacted Duke's actions and life, and is an overall supportive figure. They can often be seen doing both wild stunts and "common for their age group" activities for fun (although the game Sorry is banned because of them).
Jason and Duke would probably have a complicated relationship due to Red Hood's actions. Their similar childhoods (as far as economically and location based) would lead to jokes and shared customs that they chat with Steph about (such as Creepy Toe Joe or that specific gas station or the phrase they say as they passed that one pothole). Despite that, they have different viewpoints on Bruce and murder.
Duke is probably one of the more emotionally intelligent and communicative batfam members. If Alfred is the sassy version, Duke would get a good laugh out of those remarks and the astute observations.
Bruce and Duke angst could go hard. Bruce is trying so hard not to make his past mistakes. Duke and his perception of Bruce (he holds Bruce in high regard) and how that affects their relationship.
As far as Duke being in a "perceived to hate metas" family, that could either be hilarious or angst. I imagine people trying to intervene or "save" Duke from the Bats would be infuriating and sad to see.
Duke could also laugh at the batkids' superhero friends and how they, even as adults, are banned from entering Gotham. Duke is free to live in the manor and come and go as he pleases. Any of the batkid's meta friends have to be snuck into Gotham.
79 notes · View notes
enstarriedownbad · 11 months
Text
Izumi Sena x F!reader
‼️Minors DNI
Tumblr media
Genre: smut
Tags: dom! Izumi, reverse yandere, jealous (of you), hate-intercourse, unrequited love (you love him), misunderstanding, rough, mixed feelings
Plot: You’ve been hanging around Izumi’s favorite people for too long. He wants to show you that they only belong to him. For all he knows, it’s him that you love.
Words: 3,059
Tumblr media
By clicking on "show more," you acknowledge that you are 18+ and consent to read this fiction.
Tumblr media
First, it was Makoto, and now Leo. You have been hanging out with them from time to time recently. At ES, during work, in town… What you may or may not know is that these two are dear to a certain man. To him, your discussions always look fun from afar, fun enough to keep them distracted for a while. The time spent with you exceeds what he, Izumi, thinks is appropriate. Plus, after chatting with you, these two men always mention you to him. That's it, he's jealous.
He's known them for way longer than you, but now all they ever talk about in his presence is you? You would sometimes hang out with them at the same time as him. However, the few times you two interacted alone, you acted differently in front of him than when you were with his friends. To him, it is as if you are seducing them for your own goals, as if you are trying to take them away from him.
One evening, both you and Izumi are held back at ES for various reasons. On your way to leave work, he happens to spot you and takes the liberty to join you.
"Good evening, Y/N," he greets you.
"Oh- Good evening Izumi-san…" you reply quietly.
There we go. The "-san" honorifics followed by a distant tone. He noticed that when you call out for Makoto, or when you chat with Leo via text, you only use their names. So why were you acting so familiar with them? The answer is very simple: you are in love with Izumi. His friends noticed, and gladly give you some advice every now and then because who, other than his 'little brother' and best friend, could help you out on this? That's why they mention you to him: they ship you together.
However, it goes without saying that he doesn't know. He is too busy focusing on potential threats because of obsessive tendencies.
"You know, you can drop the '-san' with me too," he tells you while opening the exit door for you.
"Really? Okay, 'Izumi'," you reply while walking out the front door as you feel your cheeks getting redder.
You try to hide your face so that he doesn't see the blush mess that you are right now. To your dismay, Izumi interprets this as a passive-aggressive sign. He is now certain that you are acting differently around them. He wants to have a word with you.
"Are you going home?" he asks.
"Yes, why?" you reply.
"Hm… Do you want to go somewhere before heading home?"
"Sure… But where?"
He wants to get you to a quiet place, where he won't be bothered by random people. But he doesn't want another 'kidnapping' scandal to happen, so it won't be at his place. It is night right now, so most stores are closed… A karaoke? No, too noisy. Cafés? Too crowded. A hotel? Sounds like a good plan. Then, hotel it is.
Wait… To a hotel? He suddenly has an idea to make you back off from them.
You, on the other hand, can feel your heart pounding against your chest. Izumi is asking you on a date, right? You always lose your mind when you are around him. After all, your little crush on him turned into something bigger recently.
"Can we go to the hotel? I have something I'd like to tell you in private," he replies with a cold tone that you don't even notice.
"Sure, lead the way," you reply happily, eager to hear what he has to tell you.
Once you get to the hotel room, Izumi closes the door behind you.
"So what is it that you wanted to talk about, Izum–"
"I heard you had a crush."
"Huh?!"
'There is no way he knows that I like him!' you start thinking, embarrassed. And you are right. In fact, Izumi still doesn't know. He believes you're into either Leo or Makoto and acts according to it.
"I know you've been trying to get with a certain someone?" he says while getting closer to you. "You know I'm the one who's the most worthy, right?" he adds, trying to show you that he's the better option even though you don't even like either of them.
If only he knew that you liked him, he could have anticipated the fact that you just interpreted all of his sentences in a completely different way.
He gets closer and closer to you. As you slowly back up from Izumi aggressively walking up to you, you realize too late that the bed is right behind you. You trip and fall on top of it.
"I'm not gonna repeat, so listen. If it's just a one-night stand that you're looking for, I can do it. So look no more around you," he adds while staring at you with a cold glare from upward, trying to push you to accept.
What you don't know is that his plan isn't only to make you go to someone other than Leo or Makoto for sex. His goal is also to make you feel 'tainted' so that these two would never want to be with you after this night. He wants to ruin you.
But you love him and don't understand why he's acting like this all of a sudden. You believe he thinks you are an easy girl and wants to try something with you tonight after what his friends told him about you. It's the only rational reasoning that pops up in your mind. Or maybe the way he worded it could be a sign of jealousy towards the other men you talk to? After all, who could have guessed his real plan. Nonetheless, you still have some self-respect and decide to draw some boundaries. You are not to be considered some kind of easy girl.
"Izumi! That's not what I–"
You hear the sound of metal tickling. You lower your eyes. He's removing his belt. Looks like he's serious about this.
You remain frozen, not in fear, but because of something else. Your crush is really asking you to have intercourse in a hotel room he just rented? Although he's saying nonsense after nonsense, this is more than what you could ever dream of.
"Careful. If you stay here and remain idle like this, I'm gonna assume that this is a 'yes' on your part."
You stay silent. Of course that you want it.
He sighs. After all, in his perspective, you just accepted to sleep with a random guy even though you pretend to love his dear ones.
"You just have to say 'yes'. Or is it that your pride won't let you say it?" he replies aggressively.
"… Y-yes" you give in, still slightly confused about his tone.
Suddenly, Izumi begins removing your clothes, trying to make you feel even more vulnerable, as he stays fully dressed. He looks at your underwear.
"Not bad. Although I doubt they like it like this."
'《They?》', you wonder, thinking he's definitely jealous of the men around you. But little does he know, you bought these with him in mind.
Izumi sits in the middle of the bed, crossed-legged, hinting at you to place yourself on his lap. You oblige.
As he removes your last pieces of clothing while you are sitting on his thighs, he notices something.
"Really? You are already wet from this…? Aren't you a bit of a whore?"
Izumi secures you against himself by firmly wrapping his right arm below your breast. With his left hand, he slides a finger against your vulva and moves it around your slit. His hand feels warm.
"No wonder why you ask for validation from all kinds of men. You like their attention so much, huh?," he insults you while rubbing his middle finger against your clit.
Despite his harsh words, the only sound that leaves your mouth is a moan.
"A finger was all it took to make you moan? See, you don't deserve either of them," he replies coldly while rubbing his finger against your wet clit harder.
His harsh movements, along with his hateful comments, somehow feel godly. Your love juices get all over his hand as wet noises come out of your cunt. Even though you wonder what he's talking about, the one thing on your mind right now is that you are actually having sex with him.
"A-ah~ Izumi~! W-what-" you try to ask while moaning.
"Now my name is the one that comes up when you're fucking someone else than who you pretend to love? Disgusting."
You don't understand the situation. You thought he knew you liked him. His pace goes even faster. Now he uses two of his fingers to rub against your clit. You feel your body tensing up, your back arches, and your toes curl as he continues to touch you. You throw your head backward on top of his shoulder and can feel your climax coming as he keeps firm his hold on you.
"Hahh… Izumi!~" you let out.
You moan his name all over again as you cum on his strong hand, shaking in pleasure.
Izumi remains speechless for a few seconds.
"Wow… So you're really having an orgasm all over the place for some guy you don't even like? What a slut," he finally says.
"What do you mean??" you ask.
He ignores your question and shifts you around his thighs so that you face him, with little to no effort. Startled, you close your thighs.
"Come on, don't act all shy after you just moaned my name out loud, Y/N."
"…"
"Get on your back for me now, I'll spread your legs open myself."
You do as he says. You lay your back on the mattress while facing him. Izumi uncrosses his legs, gets on his knees, and spreads your legs open with one arm. Suddenly, he gets his half-erect cock out of his pants with his other hand and starts jacking off in front of your slit.
"Ugh… What a pathetic view. To say that you're supposed to be a threat," he sighs while masturbating before you.
"…"
You can't help but stare at his dick. It's quite the length. And it looks thick too.
"What? Don't tell me that your animal instincts hit after you saw my cock? Though I really wouldn't be surprised, considering the fact that you are a bitch."
You can't help but get turned on by his harsh words once again. You move your hips a bit, desperate to feel some sort of friction. Izumi notices and hardens his grip on your leg.
"Don't try to feel yourself up, unless you really are a slut who can't wait for my cock," he says while tossing himself off at a quicker pace.
The view of Izumi of all people masturbating in front of your naked body is just too much for you to handle. Despite his many insults, you reach for your clit and start rubbing.
"That's what I thought, you're a slut," he exclaims.
The man faps his cock closer and closer to your crotch. The noises your two genitals let out are so ungodly. You can see that his dick is twitching, wanting to release soon.
"Get ready for additional lube, slut," he says while his dick is right in front of your entrance. "Take it all, shameless whore," he adds while cumming all over your cunt.
He's shooting more and more of his semen over your sensitive parts, but the way he does it without any lust in his cold blue eyes is quite the view. All you can see in him is hatred. It's like he's spitting on you.
You can't help but moan his name as your second climax hits you like a truck. You wouldn't have called yourself a sadomasochist, but the way he's doing you right now is turning you on without a doubt. All you can feel is your orgasm while you're lying down all naked in front of him, with your lowest part covered in his cum. You fail to notice that he finally removed his shirt.
"I'm gonna give you one last warning. You don't deserve to be with either of them, so you better back off."
"Huh?-"
"I know you've been trying to get with Leo-kun or Yuu-kun. Why is it that you chose them of all people? Is it for your personal gains? They already have me. They don't need you," he says while placing his tip at your entrance.
Leo? Makoto? So this is what it is about. But, he got it all wrong, *he* is the one you like.
"Izumi, the one I love, it's--"
The man penetrates your insides quickly. His thick dick spreads your walls open, while also inserting some of his cum from earlier deep inside of you.  It hurts a bit, but you were already so wet that your body adjusts just as fast, taking all of him in.
"Don't you dare say his name right now when you're being fucked dumbed by another one," he threatens you while thrusting.
You remain shocked. You thought that his jealousy was aimed at other men, but it looks like it's aimed toward you. You feel disappointed about the fact that you misunderstood his feelings for you, but at the same time, something else is building up within you.
You stare at where your two bodies are connected. He's placed himself between your legs and is ramming hard into your pussy. He's thrusting aggressively, though each of his movements somehow feels amazing. You look up. Izumi is lying on top of you, his arms placed by both of your shoulders, trapping you. His gaze remains unchanged: cold and hateful.
The one you love is currently railing you hard so that you stop chasing after the one he loves. He loves another one and is fucking you so aggressively because of it. Somehow, the fact that Izumi is jealous of you because of someone else makes you lust after him even more. Your walls clench around his cock. Izumi feels it.
"My, my, what's this Y/N? You're desperate for me now? Bitch," he says while looking at you with his sapphire-blue eyes.
Izumi controls the rhythm and depth of his pelvic thrusting recklessly, fucking you as hard as possible. He wants to make a mess of you after all.
That's it, you don't care what happens next and lose yourself to him. You just want more of Izumi. You wrap your legs around his waist and rest your arms on his back as you moan his name with your eyes half closed.
"Wow... I'm speechless. But you're making it easier for me to ruin you", he says while pounding into your pussy even harder. "No one would want you after I use you like this. You won't be a rival anymore, that I can assure you."
As your legs are now at another angle, he gained even more access to your body. You feel his cock roughly hitting against your cervix, definitely leaving bruises there, as you're holding onto him for dear life.
He is now, like he said, fucking you dumb aggressively. His quick pace without a single care for your well-being is beyond what you could have ever imagined. He just wants to ruin you. But it feels so good.
Ever since you've been locked up in this position with Izumi, both of your body temperatures gradually went high. His back feels so hot against your arms. His hot breath tickles your skin. The entire room is warmed with your respective body heat. As for the mattress, it's covered in sweat, love juices, and semen. You feel yet another climax coming.
Your moans get louder. As Izumi keeps penetrating you raw, you open your mouth, begging for him to kiss you.
"You want to pretend to be lovers now? Ugh, I don't get what they see in you," he asks meanly.
Izumi looks down on you before giving in to your pathetic whim. He keeps his eyes fully open while you are closing yours. His lips softly touch yours before he aggressively wraps his tongue around your own as he continues pounding into you. Now he's even sexually submitting you in your mouth. His saliva mixing with yours feels so arousing. His kiss is so exquisite even if it is loveless.
Your desire to serve him sexually, emotionally, and physically gets bigger and bigger as he's thrusting his dick rapidly against your cervix. You want all of him. If one way to share his frustration and dissatisfaction with you is by filling you up, you are totally down. Even though he doesn't like you, you can't help but want to give him your entire body if it means getting fucked like this.
His pace gets faster. He's very close to his own orgasm as well, you can tell from his hard dick twitching inside of you. He pulls out of the kiss and leaves a spit trail between the two of you. This one strand of saliva is the last straw. That's it, you long for him and wish to own just a part of him, anything.
"Izumi~ ah! Y-you know," you manage to say even though he's ramming into you like crazy, "this whole time..."
"Hm? Do you have regrets about fucking someone else other than him now, or maybe you gave up on him?" he asks while the wet noises from where you are connected keep getting louder and louder.
"*You* are the one I've had a crush on," you finally reveal.
Izumi gives it one last thrust and pours all of his seeds deep within you.
"Wait. What?"
While he's still processing what you just confessed, all of his cum floods your insides. You cum on his dick at the same time. Your arms are gripping his back tightly, your legs are firmly wrapped around his waist, his torso is pressing against your boobs, and his face is as close to you as ever. The pressure he's putting on your cervix is helping more and more of his hot semen to gain access to your womb. For the first time during this session, Izumi stops looking at you with hatred for a second.
Tumblr media
Note: Part 2 is now available! Link here
Tumblr media
YOOOO it took me so long to write it, it's even longer than my Kanata one
Ugh I had accidently deleted it and had to get the support to look at it 👤.
But yea hope you liked yandere Izumi fic! Usually all we see is a "omg you can only love me 💔😡⛓️ stop talking to him youre mine👿☠️🐺"-yandere x reader, but this time I took it around and reversed it. Oh to be hate-fucked by a yandere who sees us as a potential threat 👤🙏🏼
I left the story there so it's up to interpretation about what he does next: fucks you even more? leaves you? changes his obsession's target to you? You choose
EDIT: I made a part 2! link above
339 notes · View notes
words-of-wolf · 2 months
Text
Content warning: this post contains mentions of wolves hunting other animals, and some thoughts on the subject. Nothing I'd consider graphic, but I know it can be sensitive for some folks so I thought I'd warn beforehand!
Hhh, it's a bit hard to know where to start with getting back into writing about my experiences.
It's not that I don't have anything to say - it's the opposite! There's so much I'd like to share. I've always loved talking about my experiences... maybe a bit self-indulgent, but I like to think it can help other folks too, and I've gotten many interesting conversations out of it in the past, so no regrets!
Can't imagine I'll be posting big things like this frequently, but I'll happily answer questions and chat too. ^u^
So... right now, what I've decided I'd like to write about is some of the, I guess kinda fundamental aspects of my identity as a wolf therian.
It's interesting in a way, because there are so many wolves around - there's a lot of people to compare experiences against! I guess, if you have a rare kintype, or a kintype that's varied enough that your individual variation of it is rare (like dragons) - it might be hard to imagine that a wolf would struggle to find other people they relate to. But then, well: there's me.
I don't think anyone's nonhuman experiences are wrong. I don't think anyones' are "superior" either; it's just about who you are as an individual, what feels right and comfortable to you. I just wanted to get that across! Cause what I'd like to talk about does involve some comparison between my feelings and the things I've seen expressed by other wolf therians, and I wouldn't want it to be read as me saying my way of being as any better than anyone elses' (it's not).
During my time in the kin and therian communities (which, I first encountered over ten years ago now, but my activity has been very on-and-off since I reached adulthood) I've met so, so many wolf therians. It's... hmm, complicated for me, in a way? Because I felt very isolated, especially when I was younger, and I felt like wolf therians were supposed to be "my people". But really, I could count on both hands how many wolves I've met that I really related to on any level.
And the reason for that is the same now as it's always been: for a lot of wolf therians, being a wolf seems to be a kind of violent, bloodthirsty identity. The "predator" feeling is strong; there's some affinity for the thrill of the kill, the violence of it all.
That's not a bad thing. It's not wrong! But my experience has been... very different from that.
My perception of wolfhood isn't really "red in tooth and claw" like that. It's more... simple. Not peaceful really - life as a wolf is full of trials and strife - but the violence never felt defining for me. In terms of personal importance, the feelings of wanting to hunt, to fight, to bite and maim... I'd be lying if I said they were entirely absent, but they were always tertiary to things that seemed far more present and central.
I think a big part of that is... well, for context, I believe my wolf identity is linked to a past life. Yeah, stereotypical, I know! But it's genuinely what I experience; I do remember that life, or at least aspects of it. And those memories influence a lot of my experiences in my current life as a wolf-person.
The thing that strikes me most when I compare my own perspective on wolfhood to the ideas often expressed by other wolf therians, is that to me, hunting wasn't violence. It couldn't be violence.
Why? Because I just plain didn't realise that the deer and other animals we killed were living things.
There was no... room to even consider that idea. I didn't know that the deer I drove to exhaustion felt pain and terror, same as I did. I just knew I was hungry and it was food.
It's a strange thing to consider, isn't it? People talk a lot about "what makes us human". I don't think there's any one thing that does. But if I were to point to one of the most jarring, and one of the most utterly sacred parts of being human to me, it would be the ability to connect emotionally with other species.
Humans are not unique for doing that. And maybe there's some animals a wolf could come to see as an individual, in the way I would've seen another wolf. But a deer would never be that. Which contrasts strangely with me, now, as a human: where I can love pigs, and care about their welfare and treatment, but still enjoy some bacon or a porkchop. That can conflict, sometimes, yeah - but from a wolf perspective, that would be incomprehensible. At least, from my experiences it would be.
And if you remove the idea of violence from hunting, suddenly a wolf's life doesn't seem very violent at all. The act of hunting and killing prey animals felt no more violent to me, than when I cook up a steak for myself now. To someone, that would be violent, but to me it's just a steak - y'know? I know the steak comes from a cow, but that fact brings me neither grief nor pleasure. It's just kinda how the world is and I'm mostly okay with that.
The act of hunting was, I'd say, something I enjoyed as a wolf. I loved the chase. It was fun. Taking down prey could be scary; even a deer is dangerous when cornered and desperate. But the thing with nature is that it makes what you have to do to survive feel desirable: so risking my life for a meal felt thrilling, in a way, and a full belly afterwards was satisfying, and comforting, and a relief from the usual gnaw of hunger.
Hunting's only a small part of being a wolf, though. Even setting aside all the attempted hunts that fall through before you even get into a full sprint.
A lot of wolf life focuses on territory. In some places, it's a very intense, almost war-like conflict; constant, bloody, often fatal. Not always, though. It depends a lot on the intensity of the ecosystem you live in: a place with lots of prey attracts lots of wolves, who then compete for access. If the prey's more spread out, the wolves are more spread out too... and an area of land feels less worth dying for when you've got so many others to search.
Me and my pack were one of the latter varieties. Territorial conflicts were rare, for us; I don't recall any specifically. We patrolled, we marked our space. Territorial disputes were something I was aware of, I think - if I saw a trespasser I certainly would've acted with aggression - but it just wasn't a common occurrence.
So my experience of being a wolf didn't feel like it was defined by violence much. It didn't feel bloody and raw. I could see myself in the image of a wolf that snarls, maybe, but moreso I see myself in the image of the wolf that sleeps, or - perhaps most of all - the wolf that wanders.
And that's what existence as a wolf was, and is for me! It's wandering. It is the neverending search. Even when you find what you need, the relief can't last long - you need to move on soon, you need to seek again soon, because it won't be long before your empty belly's gnawing at your insides again. It wasn't ever a life of violence, it was a life of travel, for the good and the bad of it: for the new sights and new smells and new opportunities; for the exhaustion, the uncertainty, the sore paws and aching muscles.
And the restlessness. The need to keep moving. Keep going. Keep searching, always searching.
But, of course, that's still not the centre piece of the puzzle. Because that could only ever, of course, be the pack.
This is something I'll probably dedicate time to writing about all on its own, because I have such deep feelings about "the pack" as a concept, and also about my pack, who I lived for in my last life.
But I will say that all of my deepest, most vivid, and most impactful memories... they're not of the hunt, they're not about territory or conflict or hunger. What I remember most richly is the love I felt for my pack. It's a feeling I can't quite find it in me to explain; sometimes I wonder if the reason I identify as loveless in this life, is simply because no love I've ever felt as a human could compare to what I felt as a wolf.
I think there's a kind of synergy between the simple mind of a wolf, and the feelings a wolf experiences: in the quiet of an animal's mind, emotions seem so much stronger, so much more vivid somehow. I feel that even now, when I have a mental shift, and the logic and reason falls away - all that's left is emotion and physical senses, and they paint a picture so, so bright.
And those past life memories that I hold dearest, they have a similar quality to them... to curl up with my family after a long day of travel. Or listen to their happy snores as we all sleep off a full belly. And playing with the pups... I was a very fun wolf-uncle. And those pups were my joy, light of my whole life! <3
So... yeah. That's what being a wolf is to me.
It's not the only way to be a wolf. It's not the "right" was vs anyone else's "wrong". This is just what wolfhood is to me personally. Maybe other wolves will see something of themselves in this, maybe not! Either way, I appreciate the time you took to read my rambling. It feels nice to carve out a place in my life again where I can really talk about this stuff. c:
55 notes · View notes
dragonrider9905 · 2 months
Note
If you could get to know and/or write with another writer (or more) who would it be?
Hi Anon!!!!!
Thank you SO much for the ask!!!!! This is such a fun one, and I appreciate you thought to send it my way!!!!!
Hoooooo boi, there are SO many cool people on here and AO3, I hope I get them all because SO many people deserve an honorable mention at least. There are also many artists who'd I'd be honored to have work collaborated with.
*Quick disclaimer, I may not tag everyone because I work long hours so if I've forgotten you, it isn't intentional, my brain is just stupid. So I shall begin!!!!
First and foremost, my dear writing friend @eclec-tech. She is literally the coolest. Her stories?!?!?!? Some of the best AU and OCs I've ever read. I will love and ship Tech/Phee, but Miran Threst has first place in my heart for Tech (even over my own OC!) She's read a lot of my work, encouraged me so much in the beginning of my time writing and even now when I get very disheartened with my progress. She's the reason I'm here on Tumblr! Her stories are just so cool. And she's a cool person.
Of course there is my bestie @photogirl894 🥰she shares my innate love for Hunter and the Bad Batch. Her ideas are SO fun and she's so fun to chat with. I've read a lot of her work before we met and I fangirled from a distance til she invited me to chat. I'm still so in awe of just talking to her, it'd be a dream to write something with her.
@apocalyp-tech-a is a moot I'd love to get to know more. Her work is freakn amazing!!!!! I know we share a love of many things, especially poetry. Her things never disappoint. Her Tech anthologies blow me away. She's so sweet and humble too.
@lizartgurl (or @jedipoodoo) I hold in awe for her medieval Batchers. I'd love to get to know her a bit more and I'D BE SO DOWN to write something with her sometime. Goodness, Hunter is beautiful on his own but BAM medieval Hunter? Just made him so much more so. She's been an inspiration to me and my own writing.
@arctrooper69 is SOOOO fun to work with!!!! She wrote "As Iron Sharpens Iron" and asked me to beta read. IT'S SO FREAKN FUN to work with her as we add fine details to her already freakn amazing story! (seriously folks, go check it out)
@carolinetano7567 has some amazing stuff I've loved seeing on here and I know we share a love of the Batch and Wingfeather! It'd be fun to collaborate someday.
@trapezequeen is such a fun presence on here too. We've discussed story ideas and it's always so fun!!!!!
Quick break to shoutout people I don't know if they're on here or not -- my great friend who I write "Hunter's Stress Journal" with, Ghost Cookie, SlimTech, Yazstar, kaydear, Cuthian, and a few other Ao3 authors I majorly fangirl over their works.
@ghostofskywalker has so many fun ideas and so many cool works and is always so sweet when I submit requests. I'm always awestruck by the work. Not to mention all the cool exchanges Ghost puts together? Those are always so much fun and so cool to participate in.
Of course there's dear @masterjedilenaaa, one of the first writers I discovered in fanfiction. I am always awestruck by the amount of detail and fine work done in all of the requests I've submitted. I think I'd faint if she'd ask me to collab.
@ladysongmaster is SUCH a cool person!!!!!! and all of the amazing stories she writes?!?!?!?! pleeeeeeease colllabing with her would be mindblowing!!!!!!
I'd love to get to know @moonstrider9904 more. I've seen a lot of her posts and she's so fun to interact with!!!!!
@klmwrites has so many different, COOOOL, like freakn cool, ideas. All of the ones I've read have left me at the edge of my seat, needing, wanting more. To work with someone so amazing and creative?!?!?! I think I'd just be too awestruck.
I have to have at least an honorable mention for @techs-stitches and @ovaa-bi-bia. They've been SO supportive of me in the past. I don't know if they write, but I love seeing their posts and getting to know them.
@frostycatblr-fandom-files is a favorite pop up of mine too. I love seeing the artwork and the stories!!!!!!! Collabing would be fun!!!!
@imabeautifulbutterfly is such an amazing, sweet, person!!!!! And the creativity?!?!?!?! the beauty with which she writes?!?!?! I would LOVE to collaborate with her. She's been a beautiful soul and a great friend <3 She might be last on the list but CERTAINLY not the least!!!! <3
Gee, I know there are more, but like my disclaimer earlier stated, my brain isn't at full steam.
So in short...a lot of people XD Thanks for taking the time to read my long winded response :) and for asking!!!! 🥰❤️
51 notes · View notes
yanderes-galore · 7 months
Text
@freedom-aviators asked: "Second request if you don't mind? Princess Peach with a darling who is the ruler of another kingdom? Just a concept"
A/N: I would love too! Here you go :) Did a concept so I hope you don't mind! Let me know how you all feel about Super Mario World yanderes as they are a bit strange to write at times lol!
Yandere! Princess Peach with Ruler! Darling
Pairing: Romantic/Platonic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Deception, Drugging, Kidnapping, Delusional behavior, Trauma mentioned, Dark content, Dubious companionship but leans romantic.
Tumblr media
I'd imagine when it comes to rulers, the topic of alliances often comes up.
It's also not new in this universe for different kingdoms to exist, since I'm pretty sure people like Daisy, Rosalina, and Bowser count as rulers and that's not even all of them.
It would make sense if you also ruled over your own people.
Plus, the Mushroom Kingdom is one of the most well known kingdoms.
You probably decided to create an alliance with them, or maybe Peach contacted you due to her issues with Bowser.
Either way your first meeting with Peach is most likely via a royal meeting or something similar.
At first your feelings towards each other is professional.
At least... it's professional to you.
The meeting was called as it's believed your kingdom and the Mushroom Kingdom can benefit from each other in an alliance.
Peach is rather extroverted and sociable.
Through the entire meeting she talks to you in a sweet yet polite tone and speaking with the princess is a pleasurable experience.
Although, here's the yandere behavior I pulled for her from a request I did awhile ago;
Peach would be Manipulative, Caring, Obsessive, Delusional, Patient, Protective, yet Temperamental at times.
She's the type where you have no idea she's anything darker beneath all the pink and happy smiles.
She'd be the type to manipulate things behind the scenes, distracting you with a pretty face until it's too late.
Even when she has you in her grasp, your little room/cage would be just as pink as the rest of her.
She's that kind of yan, pretty and cutesy even as she does things out of character.
Peach would be charismatic with a ruler darling.
When she talks to you she just seems so agreeable.
To be fair her obsession starts when she meets you, it acts rather quickly.
But you won't know about it until much later.
Which means you won't regret the alliance until it's fully situated.
Peach would be one to often invite you to her castle.
Similar to Mario and Luigi, she invites you to a cake party to chat.
It's usually always alone but she invites the two brothers just to have you accustomed to them.
Your kingdom often sends soldiers to help against Bowser, that's primarily your alliance.
Peach is certainly a yandere who'd be hard to tell.
Nothing about her really screams yandere.
She just appears to be a fellow rule and friend.
She appears to just be close to you, sure she can feel demanding at times, but nothing too bad... right?
Honestly by the time something bad happens she'll already have you in your own personal room with the door locked.
With a smile Peach would drug your cake and allow you to enjoy.
Only for you to wake up somewhere with blindingly pink and white walls.
Peach can be temperamental which would make her jealous rather easily.
She tries to hide how much she hates others speaking with you.
Regardless on if she sees you as just a friend/ally or more, she feels there's only one way to keep you to herself.
Don't worry, the room you'll wake up in is big and comfy.
Perhaps all the times she was kidnapped has gotten to her.
She knows you don't deserve a cage like she was given.
You deserve a soft room, warm meals, and lots of affection....
She'll happily give you all you deserve with a smile!
She'll dress you in clothing with mushroom designs, covered in pink to match her.
She never tells anyone but maybe Toad, her servant, about the truth.
Your kingdom is told that you now live with Peach.
Which would mean they need a new ruler... but Peach can take care of that too, right?
She tells Mario and Luigi that you're just busy when they ask about you, always looking the door to your room.
Even the restraints she gives you are soft to prevent you escaping.
Peach plans to remove all personal autonomy from you.
Ironically she feels like a nicer Bowser.
Again, their past may have something to do with it.
But Peach throws a fit when you compare her to the beast.
She's so much better than him.
He'd throw you into cage like he did with her!
Here... in such a comfortable room... she thinks you'll be much happier.
She'll take good care of you...
All while you regret ever accepting her words and falling for her deception.
75 notes · View notes
koiijournal · 8 months
Note
Can we have more of host!reader and his yan? I love them so much <333
Omg ofc! I thought that was the least interesting one I wrote, i'd be happy to write more anon!! *´ㅅ`)゙♡ (Apologies for the long wait!)
Heart that beats for you.
✩✩✩
Host!Male!Reader x Yan!Male ☆` Reader refers to you!
Tumblr media
Ever since that day, Zuo has been a regular in the host club. You'd always find him clinging in to Reader, the school prince Charming and the main attraction in the host club!! Many were suprised by the fact that Zuo was even into anyone, but because of this, the host club business has raised even more! More male students even started to come to the host club.
As usual, inside the school in a host club room. It was lively than ever, different types of hosts having a lovely chat with the guests along with teas and desserts. And as usual Zuo is with Reader, no surprises here really.
What's Reader's thinking about Zuo? The truth inside Reader, the real you. Out of those chains of the persona of the 'Sweet Charming' prince, Reader did thought that Zuo was a weird kid, he'd whisper things about how "You're his", "You should only look at him" or "He'd remove everyone who even had the slightest idea thinking about you"
Either way, Reader would just smile at him. Still everything about him just puts Reader off. But none of that matters because in this school,in this host club, around these people, the real you doesn't exist.
"Ha.. You're so divine.. How could someone like me touch you without any consequences.. Are you perhaps an angel?" Zuo admires your looks as he plays with a few strains of your hair, twirling it around his fingers.
His thoughts was about form an idea about 'accidentally' pulling a strain of your hair (totally not for anything! It's an accident after all :>)
All of the sudden, a loud crashed sound of glass vibrates around the room. All of the people checks to see what happened.
"M'lady! Are you alright?? Did the glass pierce you?" A host came to aid for the poor guest, quickly checks around her hand for any injuries. All the other hosts begin to gather around them, including Reader.
Zuo was told to wait here while he checks for safety of others, he didn't like the fact that Reader worries about others when he's right here! Isn't he the priority to Reader..?? He felt negative emotion raising through his body but it burst when he saw Reader touching the timid looking girl on the accident. And the girl slowly closing the distance on Reader.
Oh.
So that's how they're gonna play.
His grip on the glass he was holding was crushed into pieces.
Another sound crashes into the floor, everyone turned their head on to the source. Zuo's hand was bleeding badly with his blood dripping out of his hands along with the tears on his puffy eyes.
Reader was the one who reacted first and quickly runs out of the crowd to go back to him. Ahh.. You do care about him afterall!
Reader look around Zuo's hand for a small inspection before deciding "That looks bad, come on let's go to the nursery office" Without any hesitation they both quickly walk to their destination.
The girl who had an accident glares at Zuo's back before they went out of the door.
.At The Nursery Office.
"This should heal in a week, don't move your hands too much alright?" Reader says while closes the med kit box on the bed.
Zuo only smiles at Reader and playfully swinging his leg. He's just so happy that he has all your attention right now, maybe if he injures himself more.. Would you stay with him forever?
"This wouldn't have happened if I stayed with you, my deepest apology, my love" Reader gives a small kiss on their bandaged hand. Oh there you go again, that empty action of yours with sugar coated words.
Zuo was delighted but.. It didn't made his heart create a reaction. This wasn't the you he wants, he knows you've pretend every time and he hates the fact that these are meaningless love between you two.
He wants to be the one who drags you out of those fake mask, no he will.
His face turns sad again "Can you do something for me in return..?" He grips Reader's hand softly
"..Of course" Reader stares into his dark eyes that fills with emptiness.
"Then.."
"I want you to love me."
You tilt your head in confusion "I am in love with you, my love." It pains him in every inch of his body when you're lying to him, he knows you truly do!
"No.. I'm asking for the you inside. Cut the sweet act." He puts his hand on your cheek with eyes that was no longer empty, it was filled with LOVE!
You look up to him with a paralyzed body, gathering all the energy to go against the fear to speak another word. You open your mouth slowly
"...what?"
LOVE HIM FOREVER! LOVE HIM FOREVER! LOVE HIM FOREVER! LOVE HIM FOREVER! LOVE HIM FOREVER! LOVE HIM FOREVER!
Tumblr media
A/N : sorry if this sucks ahshwyagag.. My brain isn't braining anymore.
75 notes · View notes
kawaiichibiart · 3 months
Text
....PRSK April Fool's Events I'd like to see happen:
Y'all had to have know this was coming: we play with the NPCs.
Everything is literally the same (visually), the VAs just switch who they play.
This is another obvious one: Sekai Swap
Again everything is (roughly) the same (visually), but the siblings have switched roles. So: Tsukasa is the one who ended up in the hospital and Saki is the one who forgot why she decided to pursue her dreams (in this case it was becoming a pianist). Shiho is the one who was part of a group before joining her current one (Leo/need), who was assigned a role and got bullied for things she couldn't control, and Shizuku's the one who wants to go pro (as an idol of course), so she finds jobs that could help with that (honestly the Hinomoris are giving me the hardest time to figure out a good swap for). Ena is the one who pushes herself too much and compares herself to her friends, while Akito is the one who seeks validation for his singing and gets disappointed when people prefer his selfies and OOTD posts over his singing ones.
The School Sekai, Stage Sekai, and Street Sekai are all created by one person (personal vote goes towards: Saki, Minori, and An, I will also accept Toya because I honestly think that'd be fucking hilarious), the Wonderland Sekai and the Empty Sekai are both created by a group.
Personality swap but the characters keep their....quirks (? I don't know what else to call it). Like, Tsukasa could have Kanade's personality but he'd still be loud as fuck. Ena could have Saki's but still be a bitch (I say that affectionately). Etc., etc.
...we need more kid designs and thus kid 2d models, but SEKAIs were created when they were kids. Saki would visit the School Sekai whenever she was out of the hospital but still unable to see her friends. Minori got to meet Haruka, Airi and Shizuku earlier and they all decided to become idols together. An and Akito are guiding these two, scared, lost, kids around the Street Sekai and introducing them to street music earlier. Tsukasa and Mafuyu are both the only ones who start off alone. Tsukasa goes into the Wonderland Sekai whenever Saki is at the hospital and their parents stay with her. He doesn't like being alone, so the Sekai brings him comfort and it was hard for him to accept that someone else could enter his Sekai. Mafuyu would go to the Empty Sekai to find comfort in Miku. She's a lot more like Len, hiding behind Miku, shy, absolute baby. She also has a hard time accepting others can enter her Sekai. For those two, Sekai was a safe haven, a place to ease themselves and find comfort. So when other people start showing up (not the VS), they're upset.
...this is a sign I've read too many groupchat fanfics: they're all part of a Nightcord (because I'm pretty sure we've all agreed Nightcord = Discord) group chat and all the area conversations are about shit that has been brought up in the chat. Bonus points if all of the convos are mixed units. Extra bonus points if they have no idea who started it in the first place.
I'd love a subtle fuckery where, again, everything is pretty much the same, but certain characters have had their colors swapped. Tsukasa and Saki, Shiho and Nene, Minori and Honami, Shizuku and Kanade...
Unit Shuffle 2: Electric Boogaloo
There's a world where rather than Tsukasa saving Toya, Toya saves Tsukasa. Where Kohane is the one who chooses An as her partner. Where Airi, Haruka and Shizuku are the ones who put on a show for Minori and pull her up on stage in their Sekai because they want her to see as the lights become a pale peachy/orange color for her. Where Mafuyu is the one doing the saving and not being saved.
Different childhood friends. That's it. Potentially could go along with number 10.
Once again, visually, everything is the same, but the last names are all over the place. Meet the Kamishiros: Ichika and Ena. Oh, the Aoyagis? You mean Aoyagi Shiho, Aoyagi Emu and Aoyagi Rui? It's strange how Saki Hinomori and Tsukasa Yoisaki look so alike.
36 notes · View notes
carefulfears · 10 months
Note
Can you compare the Irresistible hug and the Milagro hug please !!!!!!!!! I love Milagro so much
okay our best and brightest @scullysflannel already talked about this once but let's chat on it (+ unruhe because i watched it last night) just for you babes xxx
/ irresistible
Tumblr media
irresistible is my favorite of the three, and my favorite scully trauma™ episode, as it's the most dedicated to the emotional progression.
this episode encapsulates an understanding that the x-files never shied from, that the scariest monsters are human men, it's pointless to pretend otherwise.
fresh off her abduction, a violation and loss of autonomy that she still doesn't understand, scully's reaction to the crimes of donnie pfaster is intimate: his victims are the dead, a group she's always been more connected with than most.
her grief and discomfort at the desecration of women that she's bearing witness to is so overwhelming, and it's something that she's alone in, as the men around her continue with business as usual.
Tumblr media
as the investigation continues, scully decides to go back to washington, telling mulder that she'll "better drive this investigation" if she focuses on the evidence.
SCULLY: I'm not having trouble, Mulder.
MULDER: I'd understand, Scully. This isn't exactly easy to stomach.
SCULLY: I'm fine with it. Really. I just think we're a long way from catching this guy. If we could get a print, we'd have something to go on. Right now we're at a standstill.
MULDER: I think it's a good idea. I just don't want you to think you have to hide anything from me, Scully. I've seen agents with twenty years in the field fall apart on cases like this.
Scully: I'm fine, Mulder. I can handle it.
i love this scene. his response here is so perfect. apart from checking in and asking if she's okay a couple of times, he hasn't commented on her state of mind in this situation, but he knows she's having a hard time. he supports her decision to take a step back, playing along that it's a "good idea" for her to direct her attention to the tangible evidence, but encourages her to communicate how she's feeling.
and he tells her that to struggle with a case like this is understandable, it doesn't matter how much experience you have or your position, it's normal.
(another understanding that this show always had: to react emotionally to the brutality of the world and the exploitation of the vulnerable is human, it's the people who look at destruction unflinching who are wrong.)
Tumblr media
back in D.C., scully sees her therapist. she tries, you guys. scully's "i'm fine" complex has never meant that she ignores a problem or shuts down, she tries to cope in a way that she's comfortable with. she removes herself from the scene. she goes where she'll be more useful. she schedules therapy.
Tumblr media
MULDER: Are you staying on there, Scully?
SCULLY: No. I'm coming back tonight.
MULDER: Look, Scully. I know this is a pretty horrific case -
SCULLY: I'm okay with it, Mulder. Besides, you can use my help.
MULDER: Always.
after her session, scully decides to go back. she's okay with it. she's going to keep trying.
this is one of my favorite moments. she spends this entire episode putting on a front, he spends it meeting her exactly where she is; saying, "i see you," but only to comfort, not expose.
her "you can use my help," is one of their jokes. a way to say, "i'm okay, i'm ready," that's lighthearted and doesn't show too much. when he responds, "always," his voice has such a different tone. it's so earnest, and sweet. his response takes her very seriously, her contribution and state of mind and comfort.
she'd told her therapist, "i trust [my partner] as much as anyone. i trust him with my life...but i don't want him to know how much this is bothering me." he already knows.
(her smile on the phone, they are best friends)
Tumblr media
i'm gonna borrow from the post linked up top for this next bit:
"Scully’s abduction is the major turning point in terms of how much the job affects her, and Irresistible is basically a replay of her abduction that gives her more control: she gets the catharsis of a fight, and she knows who she’s fighting (men)."
Tumblr media
after being taken by pfaster, when she's found, she pulls out one more "i'm fine," but her suppression and image can't withstand confrontation. mulder gently lifts her chin, and the moment she meets his eye, she breaks down crying into his chest. she tries so hard, she has "always been the strong one," she did not want him to know that this was bothering her. but you can't survive it without facing it.
Tumblr media
i didn't notice until today that her gag is still around her neck, she's still so ensnared. police are still making arrangements around them. it all just fades away though.
(he's whispering "it's alright," just for her to hear. when she moves her arms to hold onto him, pull him closer, his face breaks. he closes his eyes to keep from crying. he's so careful with her after her abduction, he's never had anyone come back before. this is a moment they're in together, a sort of catharsis after she returned. it's so foreign and painful to be needed, for the first time in so long.)
/ unruhe
Tumblr media
unruhe, written by my beloved vince gilligan, is the most introspective that the x-files ever gets on the dichotomous reactions to gendered violence.
"She can hear him, still stomping around inside the trailer, no doubt looking through the pictures carefully, hoping for yet more insight into the depths of the now-dead serial killer’s mind. In the back of her throat, burning acid threatens to force its way up. The luxury of curiosity, she thinks."
-selbst
throughout unruhe, mulder is hyper-focused on gaining an understanding, attempting to find the killer (and at first, the abducted women) by looking into what has been left behind, and dismissing any other courses of action.
ultimately, nothing he does assists in the case at all, and it's scully's connections and discernments that locate schnauz, mulder and herself never on the same page. unlike irresistible's quiet contemplation and gentle understanding, they're consistently frustrated with each other.
(note that in this episode, scully is bound and held captive by a man obsessed with the loss of his sister. a dynamic that she is very aware of, as she asks schnauz, "why [do i need to be saved]? do i remind you of your sister?")
Tumblr media
from the moment that schnauz's first victim resurfaces and they do the PET scan (something that only scully is able to read and understand, not mulder. something again rooted in her personal background), there is a shift in scully.
these women are being lobotomized, and they're being lobotomized incorrectly. schnauz is weaponizing medicine that he doesn't have proper knowledge of, and reducing these women into nothing. when mary lefante is found, she is unable to speak, except to repeat over and over the motivation of her captor ("unruhe," the german word for "unrest.")
Tumblr media
things escalate when the body of the second victim is found, and in my favorite scene of the episode, mulder and scully quietly observe the remains in horror, before scully just walks off and gets back in the car (in the driver's seat, a rare occurrence).
MULDER: Hey, Scully, that word "unruhe", "unrest", is bothering me. Maybe he thought he was curing them somehow, saving them from damnation, from those things in the pictures, you know, he called them the "howlers."
SCULLY: It's over, Mulder.
MULDER: Well, then that photo wouldn't be his fantasy. It would be his nightmare.
SCULLY: What the hell does it matter?
MULDER: Because I want to know.
SCULLY: I don't.
(She starts the engine. Mulder stares at her for a second, then gets in the car.)
when mulder approaches the car to ramble about "unruhe," scully never looks over at him or makes eye contact. she doesn't wait for him to get in the car before putting on her seatbelt and starting it. it is over.
i've written about this before (in the previously linked post), but mulder always wants to believe that people who do evil things have a good reason, that they didn't really mean to. that they were just trying to help, or were just following a biological imperative. scully knows that it doesn't matter.
it's the ending of 2shy, when mulder is right, incanto is only killing women because he needs their fatty tissue to survive. and he looks at scully and says, "when you look at me, you see a monster, but i was just feeding the hunger." and scully answers, "you're more than a monster. you didn't just feed on their bodies, you fed on their minds."
what the hell does it matter?
Tumblr media
ultimately, scully is forced to "empathize" with schnauz, to survive. she has to utilize the insights that mulder gleamed about him to forge a connection with him, and stall. (she is always listening, and she knows mulder is right. sometimes it just doesn't make things any better.)
as the situation progresses, when she hears mulder outside she's able to wrestle her arm out of its constraint and rip the tape off of her mouth. by the time mulder breaks in and shoots schnauz, she's all but freed herself.
Tumblr media
mulder takes her hand and helps her up, and she bypasses him, walking out of the trailer into the light, with one last look back at schnauz. she leaves mulder with the body, as he's looking at the photos. (the luxury of curiosity.)
Tumblr media
the only time that we see scully show emotion or vulnerability in this episode, is in the final frame. sitting alone in her apartment, she looks at the altered photos of herself, and her lip quivers as we cut to the ending credits.
where irresistible saw her actively trying to gain control, unruhe is more genuine. she's not trying to conceal anything, she's just tired, and she's alone.
/ milagro
Tumblr media
ah, milagro. quintessentially season 6 in a way that i can never establish as positive or negative.
milagro is all about desire: a desire for attention, for approval, for relevance. it's only fitting that it should be so punishing.
Tumblr media
ultimately, milagro is about voyeurism, and we have this represented through our monster-of-the-week: scully's stalker phillip padgett.
when scully meets padgett (who had recently moved into the apartment next to mulder) in a church, it's to observe the painting displayed there, "my divine heart."
as he reveals that he knew she would be there to see the painting, as well as many personal details that he has "noticed" about her, it's a heavily emotional discomfort to be so seen.
Tumblr media
so much of this episode builds in padgett's apartment, just one door over from mulder. when scully knocks, she tells padgett she was on her way next door and just thought she'd stop and return the milagro charm that he'd given her (a symbol of a burning heart) because she "can't return the gesture."
we talked about this when we talked about small potatoes, but this episode is...embarrassing for her! the kind of attention that she craves is embarrassing to her.
when she comes into padgett's apartment, padgett remarks that it's because she's "curious." she notices things too.
SCULLY: Well, you lead a curious life.
PHILLIP PADGETT: It's not so different from yours I imagine-- lonely.
SCULLY: Loneliness is a choice.
loneliness is a choice, babes! the way that small potatoes ended in classification of mulder as a "loser by choice" (for all of the things he could have, and all of the things he chooses not to pursue), and scully absolving him of that criticism, milagro puts the agency of this mutual repression back onto scully.
(choice and agency is a very important reiterated theme in scully's character. this whole thing only works if she chooses to be here.)
and when mulder comes in to arrest padgett based on evidence found in the murder case, scully is in his bedroom by choice. (very very embarrassing for her)
Tumblr media
like these tags said, "psychologist mulder taking two years to connect the dots scully laid out for him in never again."
god, this episode makes me so uncomfortable. it's also the only one of these three that i've never rewatched, so that's why i'm a little more lax in discussing it.
MULDER: No one can predict human behavior. No one can tell you what another person's going to do.
SCULLY: Well, isn't that what you do, Mulder, as a behavioral profiler? You … you imagine the killer's mind so well that you know what they're going to do next.
MULDER: If he imagines it, it's a priori-- before the fact. I think that's pretty clear from what he wrote about you.
laughs nervously...isn't that what you do!! don't you know people's minds and desires!!
when mulder tells scully that padgett's book ends with her having sex with the narrator, and asks, "i'm assuming that's a priori too?" it's so reminiscent of office desks and tattoo ink.
when she replies, "i think you know me better than that," they're both thinking of philadelphia, of something etched in her back that they've never put to words. that too, ended in fire, with desire punished.
(i'm always slack jawed at him asking her flat-out if she fucked the stalker. quintessential season 6, baby! eat your heart out!)
Tumblr media
PHILLIP PADGETT: I made a mistake myself.
MULDER: What's that, Mr. Padgett?
PHILLIP PADGETT: In my book, I'd written that Agent Scully falls in love but that's obviously impossible. (looking at MULDER) Agent Scully is already in love.
agent scully is already in love, agent scully already desires so viscerally, (agent scully is making things personal, as mulder had rebutted in defense of diana, not long enough ago)
i know a lot of people love this line, but it just makes me want to weep for her. scully is such a discreet person, she values her privacy so much, and has so little of it left. it's the emotional equivalent of her physical exploitation, to have her most personal and intimate feelings exposed like this. 
loneliness is a choice, and that’s her’s to make, the way mulder’s choice was affirmed in small potatoes.
(padgett as a character is a stand-in, he represents the voyeurism of an audience, of projecting a persona onto someone for personal gratification. he isn't ascribed any motive. but this to me, feels like a power trip, even if unintentional. he's perhaps just being honest, but he's recognizing that he can't have her body, so he exposes her soul. he also doesn't know scully as well as he thinks he does.)
both never again and milagro are about a caricaturized self, embracing or rebuking who you are in someone else's eyes. whether scully is perceiving herself as mulder's loyal first mate who "always does as told" or padgett's lonely object of lust, she responds by leaning into that exposure, going where she's wanted, and continuing her ascribed "cycle" of devotion and rebellion.
Tumblr media
the reveal in the end, is that this week's monster is not truly padgett, but a character that he's created, who is committing the murders described in his book.
like padgett himself, the killer is a personification of longing; it's him who declares that the only way for the book to conclude, is for scully to die.
but just as jerse did in never again, padgett throws himself in the fire to narrowly absolve scully of the fated ending, and sacrifices his heart for hers.
Tumblr media
when mulder realizes what's happening and races back up into his apartment, the sight is bone-chilling. she actually looks dead, unconscious and covered in blood, from a wound that's now healing.
Tumblr media
when she wakes up and sees him over her, she reaches for him as abruptly as she opens her eyes. she claws into him, her fingers never stop grabbing at him, pulling him closer and closer and sobbing into his neck.
so little of it actually matters. she almost died without him there. this is after tithonus, and she's remembering those lessons again. (what about love? you don't want to be around when it's gone.)
Tumblr media
and just as in irresistible, mulder breaks too, feeling the weight with her.
/
anon, to compare the three, i would say they each represent the theme of their particular place in the narrative and scully's characterization.
irresistible is the fragile dependence of a post-abduction season 2: perceiving comfort as a weakness, fear as a burden, but needing it anyway. recognizing who you trust, what that means, and that wounds can't heal in detachment. from each other and from the brutalization of the world itself.
unruhe is the building isolation of season 4: going where someone can’t follow, whether in societal experience or the looming instability that’s close ahead.
and milagro is the painfully confrontational tension of season 6. having your heart ripped out of your chest, bleeding, in attempts to be understood. just clutching what you need, weeping, in the end: there’s no use fighting it. (or hiding it. loneliness is a choice, but there’s freedom in being stripped of options)
it is a growth, in a diminishment of pretense and self-consciousness. it just comes at a cost.
i also want to bring it back to @scullysflannel’s post on this topic, because she summarized another aspect of it that i didn’t touch on:
“Scully tells the therapist in Irresistible that she doesn’t want Mulder to think he has to protect her, and I feel like the end of Milagro is about Scully accepting his type of protection, and by extension his type of love. Padgett makes her want Mulder to pursue her in a way he’s never done, but Padgett also ultimately shows her the danger of being sought after like that, and it makes Mulder’s straightforward protectiveness look pretty good. it doesn’t matter right then if Mulder is giving her everything she wants. she needs him.”
milagro is about desire, and ultimately it’s about a relinquishing of desire. scully is drawn to padgett because he offers her something that mulder doesn’t (won’t?) give her, and she’s ripped to pieces because of it.
it is punishing, to want something so badly. ultimately, when she almost loses it all, she’s clinging to what she has.
(but mulder is learning too, and they’ll get there. they’ll get to all of it.)
81 notes · View notes
vashtijoy · 6 months
Text
on canon
So here's the deal:
No work of fiction has a single interpretation. There are as many interpretations, pretty much, as there are people, and that's because the job of fiction is to tell us about ourselves—about others too, yes, and about the world around us, yes. But primarily, a work of fiction is a collaboration between the author and the reader/viewer/player/etc.
What does that mean, exactly? Surely the creator is the one who gets to say what a character is? Well, no.
Let's take a character (call him... idk, something nice and generic, like "Boro"). The creator wrote Boro with certain ideas in mind. But Boro doesn't really come to life until he reaches the viewer—when the creator's concept interacts with the viewer, to create something new. And there are a lot of viewers.
A work of fiction is as much what the viewer sees as it is what the creator intended. It's what we all bring to it, as much as it's what the creator wrote. Art is not dictated; it's not a straitjacket, with rules and diktats that must never be broken. Art is released into the world. Because art is nothing without an audience.
What Boro (or his frenemy Ben, or their close lookalikes Bight and Bell, or any characters or canon you want to name) are is as much about how you think of them, and what you see, and what you personally bring to them, as they are about their dialogue and visuals and the events of their plot.
on fanfiction
This means there is really no "bad" fanfiction. We all create and write to our own vision—we draw on our ideas of the original work, on the inspiration we personally drew from it. We take the things that spoke to us—that moved us, or obsessed us, or that we just found funny—and we create things we love, using the original work as a source. Plus, we're all learning our art—some of us have been writing for twenty years, and others have just started. That kid writing today will write the epics of tomorrow. So don't bite the newbies.
Sometimes our shared universes overlap, and that's great! Sometimes nobody else agrees, which can be kind of lonely—but doesn't make your vision somehow less valid. We are not painting by numbers; we're creating a palimpsest of slightly different (or very different) visions.
Why start fights because someone else doesn't share your artistic vision? Make your own thing that you like. We're a flock of birds singing, not the Borg.
digression: so why do you spend so much time talking about canon
I'm more of a researcher than I'm a writer. And what became clear to me very early on was just how much I'd missed on my playthrough of P5R—and just how well the story hung together, when you scratched a little below the surface. Those things interest me. I don't like the feeling that I misunderstood things, and I like unearthing connections, obscure text chats that are easy to miss, cockeyed correspondences that don't necessarily mean anything, and so on.
For me, canon is our shared baseline. It's the light outside before it hits our retinas, before we get into the detail of whether the blue I see is really the blue you see. I find digging into canon can spur ideas; a close look at it can support interpretations that are often ridiculed ("Akechi feels remorse for his actions" would like a word).
Ultimately, everything I blog about is my interpretation. I hope it's accurate and I'm glad when it speaks to people! But it's not the law. And if people are creating things that don't agree with it? Good. That's exactly how it's supposed to be.
tl;dr
Write your story. Sing your song. Tell your truth.
37 notes · View notes
luxlightly · 3 months
Text
When I'm being generous, I consider myself to be something like an artist. I think it's reasonable to desire to want to connect with other artists whose work I admire.
I think it's a reasonable desire to want to be admired by those you admire. Reasonable to want to be admired at all.
Somewhat egotistical, certainly, but well within the normal range of healthy human ego to want someone to be starstruck by my presence. To be wowed by me.
Or to, in receiving recognition from those I am, myself, starstruck by, being raised to that same level.
I am desperately lonely, I've found. Even with two roommates. It's just different. My roommates are my family. It's a natural desire to have connections with other humans outside of our immediate family circle. An acceptable thing to feel lonely from.
That level of loneliness makes connecting hard and makes parasocial (meaning "indirect or adjacent to social") interaction awkward and painful.
I'd like to watch Gianni streams or streams of any people whose work I really like but "I'd desperately like to sit down with you and have a 3 hour in depth conversation about your work and inspirations as an actor" is not an appropriate energy to bring to a livestream and ends up just making it not fun for me, even if I'm not in the chat at all.
I struggle with allowing myself to be lonely and yearn for certain connections without feeling as though I'm being somehow inappropriate. I'm trying to kill the thought police in my mind.
But it's difficult. I don't really see myself ever being in a position where I'm even interacting with other artists I admire the work of or people I deeply admire in general. I can't really leave my home very often. My fatigue is too intense. Which also stops me from trying to create great works that might inspire admiration, not that I really have the skill for it anyway.
I'm pathologically starved for attention while very aware that the kind of adoration I crave would be inherently unhealthy for me not to mention impossible to acquire from lack of energy and lack of personal qualities that could be adored.
I'd love to fall in love with someone who amazes me. But I can't see that kind of person ever having any reason to interact with me in the first place, or to be anything but mildly bored by the interaction.
The idea that anyone could fall in love with me at all is beyond what I can imagine. the idea of someone being in love with me because they found me amazing sounds like a joke with no punchline.
I'm just kind of going through it right now.
20 notes · View notes
theladyragnell · 2 months
Note
hi nell! can you share some insight into how writing things (e.g., letters) in-character affected your experience of playing d&d, and what made you start doing it to begin with? (also, any tips for note-taking during sessions?)
I started doing writing letter recaps because @samyazaz was doing it and I'm a joiner! So the reasons behind it were as simple as that, and I love epistolary anything so as soon as she told me she was doing it I was sold.
So, overall, I found them an incredibly helpful tool. They helped coalesce my notes into a narrative, and they helped me check in with where my PC was at in her head after every session (I am not an improv professional, I found those few hours of distance REALLY helpful for coming back into the next session with a good idea of how to play things). They also gave my DM and party a chance to see the same, and there was definitely a time or two when my letters made @sovinly realize I'd misinterpreted or missed something. Because none of us were super confident at roleplay, it also gave me a chance to do some relationship development between my PC and NPCs who were in a different place (and eventually allowed me to do my big epistolary romance because of the narrative I'd built up across letters with my DM's help).
So, overall, it really helped me with a lot of character arc and relationship things! And beyond that, it felt like a fun little meta-game to play (not in the sense of metagaming (derogatory) like people talk about with D&D, like more a game of making it into a fandom while it was being constructed), and it helped me pay better attention and write better notes! I went from writing a few scattered NPC names and basic summaries to writing something like a thousand words of notes per session because I wanted to remember as well as possible for the recaps.
But, okay, re: your other question, I'm going to be very honest here: I am not good at notes. As you might have picked up from what I literally just wrote, they tend to be either feast or famine with me! I write the titles of the powerpoint slides or I write down everything the teacher says with very little in-between, to use a class notes metaphor.
But on the whole I highly recommend your session notes include:
New NPC names and jobs, and their general relationship to your party (friendly shopkeeper, the rogue's aunt, the sorcerer's fifth grade nemesis, whatever)*
New locations and anything important about them (abandoned temple outside of town, sea cliff dotted with caves)
New information received (definitely from the DM, but also from fellow PCs for bonus points, your cleric will be delighted if you remember they're from the town of Bibblesworth next time you all RP together)
New lore received
A vague sketch of the session's events (including mention of any old NPCs or locations that have come into play)
A summary of any plans for what's coming up that you're party has come up with, especially if you were planning for next time (don't be that guy who forgets in the week(s) between sessions that you all decided that you were all going to sneak into the sea cliffs together and wanders off to chat with mermaids instead while the rest of your party gets TPKed)
The first four things I recommend you take notes on during the session, and the last two I recommend you jot down when it's over, either right there at the table or as soon as you get home/off the zoom call from the session. It's a balance I've never quiiite managed, but it seems like a very reasonable and functional one to me.
*Optionally, take down a bit about their appearance too, because while no DM I've played with has done this, I feel like plenty of DMs do put on an expectant voice and say "And in front of you is standing a redheaded gnome wearing golden armor" and think the party will greet a familiar NPC with joy when they might not have that description memorized.
16 notes · View notes
hillerskalibrary · 8 months
Text
Event poll results!
(summary version)
So last week I opened a poll to check what kind of YR fandom events you guys wanted to see and the respondents were... how shall I put it... "very excited" is most applicable I think? ;)
Because I'm a nerd who likes to analyze the results but also doesn't want to chase her entire following away, I'm going to make two result posts:
This post, where I will summarize the results as succint as I can, and address some of the remarks and suggestions that I received. I'll also make a conclusion on what I would suggest to do - feedback on that is certainly welcome!
A second post (which I'll link when I finish it, most likely tomorrow or even after cause I'm slow as fuck) with some more graphs, percentages, observations, cause I don't know shit about statistics but that won't stop me from having fun with it!
Fair warning - it's pretty long. I just find it easier to explain a little about the decisions I'm (not) taking, both to invite discussion and because I don't want this to be a black box blog that does whatever and you never know why. That being said...
Ready? Let's go!
RESULTS
I received 72 responses, 36 writers and 36 readers.
The top 3 most wanted events by READERS is: Big Bang (89%), Theme Week (86%), and Weekly Challenges (83%). The event they were least excited about is Author Interviews (56%).
The top 3 events writers most want to PARTICIPATE in is, in order: Author Interviews (69%), Theme Week (64%), and Fic Exchange (61%). The events they DO NOT want to participate in are Author Interviews (25%), very closely followed by Big Bang and Advent (both 22%).
READERS were (very) slightly more excited about a Wilmon theme week rather than a general YR week. WRITERS clearly preferred a general YR week. For both groups, a YR women week comes in third, and rarepair week is fourth.
All types of weekly writing challenges suggested scored similarly.
(I know some of these seem contradictory, which I why I'll make the second post explaining how I calculated these rankings and why -for example- Author Interviews are both the most AND the least popular event for writers ;) )
SUGGESTIONS
A lot of people wrote in suggestions, which I was SUPER happy about (I closed the form now but if you have any more, please just hit my inbox or DM me at @hilliska). A few people also offered to help, which I'm definitely gonna hold you to when decisions are starting to get made! ;)
Many people were excited about possible collabs between writers and artists.
"What about a "finish your draft/wip" or "write a new chapter on a wip". I have so many languishing WIPs…" I think this is an EXCELLENT idea tbh - though we could incorporate it in the big bang by allowing wips as well. Also, as an FYI, there is also a (non-fandom-specific) Finish Your Shit-Big Bang that takes place every year (though this year's round is close to posting already) ;).
"I’d also love to see more Podfic in this fandom, but I don’t know how that could be an event." I have zero experience with podfic but this does sound (ha!) like it could be fun. Maybe someone has experience with this from a different fandom? (honestly I'd love to experiment with this so hmu)
"Authors sign up to take one shot requests or readers get to write a prompt. Or if readers could submit or vote on prompts or something? Or readers submit a song and author writes a one shot based on a song. Something like that where readers can be involved too :)" We could also easily incoporate this in a big bang - do a prompt bang or a reverse bang (fic based on art) for example? Or maybe involve readers in the weekly challenges, by suggesting tropes/words/... ?
"Write a comment on a fic-week!" Yessss!!!! I am like... 95% sure there is a tumblr-wide event for this already but I can't for the life of me find it. So I could signal boost that or yeah, we could just pin a day ourselves :).
"Group chat/watch" I'm afraid I'm not the right person to organize this kind of thing, but if you've been thinking of doing this and you were afraid no one would be interested - this is your sign!! ;)
"live writing event" Same as above - though I do think there's some discords where this happens already?
"Some sort of collab, where authors get to write a fic together." This could definitely be fun! There is currently one that originated on Twitter called Unlabeled - I don't know all the writers but I recognize at least @yourdemiurge, @skydragon05, @1-life-to-give, and @in-amor-veritas. Which obviously doesn't help if you're a writer wanting to collab, but at least there's people with experience in this fandom ;).
"Maybe a poetry week?" I don't even write poetry but I'm obsessed with this suggestion. Could also be a writing challenge? Not sure about a whole week either, but there's World Poetry Day in March so maybe that can be a mini-event?
"Something not fic centered? Like fanart, edits, cosplay etc." This is one of those things that I'm throwing out there for other people to run with, maybe, because. Well, I'm a writer and I know fic, but I really don't know much about the rest... Which is not to say I don't want to (help) run anything like this because it definitely could be fun, but it's a little out of my wheelhouse. But maybe @youngroyalsfanartarchive can help or knows people who would?
And now what??
Consider the below not as a definitive list but as a stream-of-consciousness conversation starters, so don't hesitate to send me your thoughts.
I will definitely do a Big Bang. Prompt-based or art-based or wip-based or something else remains to be decided, but this will happen. It will not happen NOW, however, because we don't know when season 3 will air. Big Bangs are big events, they ask a lot from writers, and if the s3 premiers at any time between signups and publications, it's going to make everything more difficult. But there was sufficient interest by writers to participate, so once we got a s3 date I want to put a timeline on this.
I'm talking with people about a possible YR women's week. The general/Wilmon week scored higher in the polls, but since we already had that in spring I'd like to switch it up a little.
I would like to do *something* for the anniversary of s2. Don't want to go regular theme week for this because of the above possibility, but maybe the not-fic-centered event could be good for this - we could do favorite episode/favorite non-wilmon character/... which are things that non-content-creators can also participate in by writing a short paragraph, reblogging gifsets/art of that episode/character, ... "Finish your wip" would also be a good one for this though :)
The people behind the 2023 Secret Santa will not organize one this year, but I don't really want to jump in that, necessarily, because there's enough other possibilities and they might be back. But a Valentine fic exchange could maybe work?
The advent calendar idea drew mixed reactions (maybe because it's less well known?) and while I do think it could be fun, there's enough other things that people are excited about, so I'm putting it in the freezer for now.
The weekly challenges also drew mixed reactions - both readers and writers were excited to see them happen, but only a third of writers said they would definitely/probably participate. Then again, half of them said they would POSSIBLY participate. Maybe because it's an ongoing thing, so they don't want to promise they'd participate EACH WEEK but only sometimes? So I'm not sure about this (also because it would significantly up the time required to maintain the blog). So I'd love more feedback on this to see which shape or form you guys would like this to take.
Fic recs scored solidly in the middle of the possibilities for both reader and writers. I wanted to include it because I was curious, but I'm a little hesitant to really do something with it, mostly because it often ends up being a popularity contest and. Well. We already know how to sort by kudos/comments on AO3. So I'm curious to hear other people's experiences on how to maybe circumvent that.
The Author Interviews were the most contested event - even (or rather *especially* among writers (and I secretly think it's hilarious the most wanted event by writers is the one that doesn't require them to write at all :D). I do think it could be fun (though I admit this is a format mostly geared towards writers) to help other writers to find other people to collaborate with, find betas, learn about different writing processes, ... And a self-rec feature would allow for fic recs without the popularity factor. So I'll most likely run this as a (bi-)weekly feature alongside the other events.
39 notes · View notes