GOTTA KEEP THOSE RECEIPTS, DAWG

I have an ap lit assignment due in 2 hours it’s literally just 9 sentences of analysis that is so fucking easy for me WHY WONT MY BODY WORK! Growls. I hate you chronic fatigue

percabeth yuri brain rot ahoy

au where everything is the same except poseidon and sally jackson have a daughter named ariadne (depending on the version u choose she got a happy ending with dionysus which is canon in the books) she probably goes by ari idk idk

anyways ari doesnt realize shes a lesbian, shes just like ‘oh yes my best friend annabeth who i have completely platonic feelings for’ and annabeth realizes shes bi but shes stuck in yearning hell not wanting to risk their friendship or creep ari out

most story beats would stay the same (tho titans curse would probably need a serious overhaul so good thing im not talking about that x) and they do still mess up circes island tho im not sure why yet, but in botl annabeth does NOT kiss ari, and only figures out after ari is missing that shes bi

(meanwhile on calypsos island ari is like ‘ohh sorry im not into girls like that’ and calypso is like yeah the gods always send heroes who cant love me)

anyways they dont get together after the last olympian, instead ari wakes up amnesiac in the woods with only the memory of annabeth and shes like ‘ohhh that must be my girlfriend’ and doesnt question it again

now this is my hc for just regular canon percy too that even after the gorgons blood the old memories and the new ones formed in the in between would get a little mixed up so the argo II arrives in new rome and annabeth runs up to ari to go in for a hug when ari just starts kissing her (annabeth is so shocked she forgets to even judoflip her) n e ways they make it official that night in the stables and that would make the rome date their first real date

The only thing I despise about the song is: the ending! The fucking fade out takes too long 😅

got my hair cut today (haven't had it cut since early april) and it always looks good when a stylist blow drys it but it's always sorta a toss up of if it'll look good with my normal styling (which is basically nothing lol) so the jury's out until tomorrow BUT

right now i really like it 🥺 i got a bunch cut off and i feel so much better 🥺

i’m starting to realize i might have misunderstood what that post was actually trying to talk about but i hold by what i said and that post was fucking dumb lol 

hi!!! i love your art quick question was your caption "at the end of the long horrible story was you" original or a quote from somewhere? either way what an absolute raw line!

thank u! that one is original— my personal policy is if i use a quote to always mention where it’s from so any words you see me tossing around with a clown’s carefree heart are all mine n n

always thinking about the 10 minutes where harry was passed out

Continuing my thoughts because I need to get through this drama, I've invested too much time not to:

It's true season 1 was much more enjoyable than season 1 due to the fantasy and mystery aspect. I'm a huge fan of xianxia so it hit the perfect spot since sometimes cdrama xianxia can get really tedious and in over their head. kdrama has a way of keeping things rooted to the ground (mostly anyway). the acting was top notch in the first season, save for the awkward kdrama pauses but i chalk that up to the kdrama charm. however, i do enjoy the romance more in season 2. I think the chemistry between the two leads is perfect, and I love how they kept the original boldness of naksu. it is her after all. I think the actress is doing wonderfully considering the lore and what she remembers. amnesia plots aren't bad if they're done right, and in 10 episodes they did well enough.

my issue as always was with how many loose threads they kept on introducing, along with contradictions and plot holes. it didn't help that jin mu was practically invincible, since everyone and their mother in season 1 knew he was involved with alchemy of souls. not to mention the whole naksu/bu yeon dichotomy that honestly could've been cleared up with one conversation in season 1. also the firebird plot for season 2 was way too weak considering how strong the whole alchemy of souls thing was. there was no reason to bring back so-i only to torture seo-yul with half-assed what-if romance. jin cho-yeon moved too fast considering she was willing to kill naksu in the end of season 1 when naksu went wild and killed her father. i don't remember the medicine lady ever being that annoying and invasive. jung-uk, surprisingly, moved on from this three-year grief and love for Mu-deok quite easily. all in all, so much character suicide everywhere. but it's okay because i enjoy trashy romance and narrative patterns. ugh.

honestly, the show is very good. credit where credit is due. i was very excited and hooked all the way up to the end. the only reason why i started to watch it was because of the season 2 screencaps. I just didn't expect the ending of season 1 to be so deeply unsatisfying to ruin most of season 2. that felt unfair to me as a viewer and someone who wanted to respect the actors and actresses for their efforts.

i do want them to do a season 3 with a new cast and plot though. i would watch it simply because the world, magic, and action was so fun and interesting. i just hope they get better writers this time lol.

Guys guys guys guys guys GUESS WHAT

I started a new medication that was supposed to help with my insomnia- Doc said side effects included difficulty waking up and drowsiness during the day, but I figured, fuck, I have major depression and chronic fatigue, I already live like that, what do I have to lose, right?

So I ran a couple days to test it out, and I still wake up in the night, still sometimes get up and can't sleep, BUT. BUT??

I'M NOT CONSTANTLY TIRED ANYMORE??

I wake up naturally after about 9 hours without an alarm! I consider staying in bed longer but I get restless and need to get up! I don't get foggy and detached and disoriented after a couple hours at work! I HAVE ENERGY TO DO THINGS AFTER WORK??

Yesterday I came home after bad sleep and a longest boring shift and I CLEANED MY KITCHEN, SWEPT THE FLOORS, AND INVITED MY SIBLINGS OVER FOR A MOVIE. I made GUACAMOLE. Then I had a BATH and TOOK MY MEDS.

A week ago, the past twenty-odd years of my life consisted of waking up, fighting myself not to go back to sleep, sometimes failing and sleeping for fifteen hours solid, going going school or work, then coming home and immediately after eating, going back to sleep. Cleaning was an effort, hobbies were an effort, waking up was an ordeal, staying awake was an ordeal, and every day consisted of waking up 30 minutes before work, shooting back a redbull, working, then eating a gas station sandwich and going back to bed. Sometimes engaging in a hobby on a good day, going to the gym when I could drag my carcass up out of guilt.

I'M AWAKE. I woke up ON MY OWN. BEFORE NOON??

I cannot explain how happy I am. This shit was supposed to stop me waking up every 30 minutes and then make me drowsy all day by accident. BUT INSTEAD I HAVE A LIFE NOW?? I'M DOING THINGS???

I bought groceries TWICE last week. I CLEANED MY BEDROOM. I DID LAUNDRY

Vghfrhfdydstgfhjydguyj this probably isn't the place to be rambling but I'm genuinely so happy. This is how people on TV live. I didn't think it was real

Cuddles

Alastor x Reader (QP)

You were always respectful of the fact that Alastor didn't like physical touch that he didn't initiate. You never asked why, never tried to force him otherwise, never even considered trying to touch him without his consent. This remained true for all the years you'd known him.

But sometimes it got really fucking difficult.

After a long day of work, then chores, then helping with the hotel, you were absolutely exhausted. And you still had dinner to look forward to. As much as you loved Al, his need for dinner formality really got on your nerves sometimes. At least the food was good.

Luckily, there was a little time where you could escape to your room. Closing the door behind you, you kicked off your shoes and dramatically collapsed onto the bed. As soon as your body hit the mattress, you wanted to stay there for the rest of eternity.

But that wasn't an option.

Groaning, you decided it wouldn't hurt to close your eyes for a moment. Besides, Alastor would want you to be lucid for dinner. Closing your eyes for a second would help.

"Ah, there you are." Distantly, you heard Alastor poke his head in the room. "I would like your input on supper, if you don't mind."

Unable to muster words, you made some unintelligible noises into the bed, curling up more with the blankets. Alastor's footsteps were muffled by the carpet, so you didn't know he was standing right next to you until he spoke.

"Seriously, darling, it is much too early to be sleeping. Don't be so dramatic."

A hand fell on your shoulder, probably to try and take the blankets off you. However, in your half-awake stupor, you shifted to grab the hand, pulling it towards you in an effort to pull some comfort out of it.

Your brain didn't compute what you'd just done for a full 30 seconds, until, suddenly, it hit you. Despite your exhaustion, you immediately let go of Alastor's hand and jerked to a sitting position.

"Al, I'm so, so sorry," you said, your voice sounding more tired than anything else. You ignored the way your eyes kept trying to close, Alastor's figure being nothing more than a red blur in front of you. "I didn't mean to. Give me a minute, I'll be down to help."

Alastor hummed, the contemplative hum you've learned to differentiate over time. Vaguely, you were aware that Alastor's smile softened a bit.

"I can spare ten minutes," Alastor finally said. "Move over, if you please."

You stared at him, blinking tiredly, struggling to understand what was happening.

Expectantly, Alastor motioned to the bed. "Nine minutes and thirty-five seconds."

Then it kicked in. Hastily, you moved over to the other side of them bed, giving enough room for Alastor to sit down with his back against the headboard.

Blankets curled around your shoulders, you sat there, hesitating.

"You may." Alastor answered the unspoken question. "For eight minutes and fifty-two seconds."

It was impossible to deny the smile that grew on your face as you crawled into Alastor's lap, resting your head on his chest and closing your eyes. Gently, Alastor wrapped his arms around you, holding you.

Wrapped in blankets, leaning into Alastor's solid body, the darkness behind your eyelids enveloped you. It felt like you were floating, just your and Alastor, and nothing could ever harm you ever again. As long as you kept your breathing steady, everything would be okay.

Everything would be okay.

You were right; just closing your eyes for a few minutes helped immensely. It was even better that it was spent with one of your favorite people in all of Hell. And if Alastor "accidentally" forgot to keep track of the time, extending your cuddle for an extra two minutes, you weren't going to say anything.

RIGHT so yesterday marked 8 months worth of days exercising (240 days) and these are my stats

Lads I am having a fuckin TIME (derogatory)

waiting to leave the house takes FOREVER. why are my neighbors up at midnight. waiting until an hour after just so im sure my family is asleep. trying to be quiet so i dont make the dogs bark. getting ready for the cold ass weather so i dont get frostbite. smh

𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 ∣ smut ( minors dni ), fem!human!reader, from behind, rough sex, use of sex toys ( cockrings ), don’t ever wear or allow someone to wear a ring for longer than 30 minutes pls, noncon ( reader asks to stop, satan doesn’t ), all characters featured are aged 18+

𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗻𝘁 ∣ please reblog && leave feedback. not proofread so there’s probably mistakes. thanks for reading < 3

𝗱𝗼𝗹𝗹’𝘀 𝗯𝗮𝗱𝗮𝘀𝘀 𝗯𝗶𝗿𝘁𝗵𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗯𝗹𝘂𝗿𝗯𝘀 ∣ poll winner [ satan + cockrings ]

this had been a terrible idea.

but you’d only started to realize it now, when Satan wouldn’t slow down or ease up. it was the same, loud PLAP, PLAP, PLAP! over and over. heavy balls slapping against your swollen clit as he fucks you relentlessly.

“I— need—“ you were panting, trying to clench your fists, but the devil king had a tight grip on both of your elbows, keeping your arms jerked back towards him, using them like levers to wrench your body back into his rough thrusting of hips. “B—break!!”

a low growl vibrates from deep within his chest, the muscles in his arms tightening, veins bulging. he holds you in a vice as soon as you utter the word, as if solidifying the fact that he’s not going to let you go anywhere until he’s done. “Not so fast, hng, you’re the one that wanted me to wear this fucking thing in the first place, weren’t you?”

it was almost a taunt.

but it was the truth. you’d talked him into securing the tight, shiny gold ring around the thick base of his cock. watching in awe when he hissed through his teeth as the sensation of being forced to stay hard, even when he wanted so desperately to cum. the pressure of the ring, squeezing him, didn’t allow him to.

and this was your punishment for denying him.

“And now you’re bitching about it?”

your eyes cross as his pounding seems to find a new speed and velocity, and you choke out a pleading cry. “It’s b—been hours—! You can take it o—off!!”

Satan chuckles, and releases your arms. “Oh, no, I don’t think so.” he grunts, watching you collapse forward against the bed and slump into the mattress, but the second you reach your arms forward, as if to pull yourself out from under him, he presses all of his weight down on your back, his knees jabbing into the backs of yours, pinning you in place and keeping your trembling legs spread open so you have nowhere to go. you feel the solid ring like a hard bumper, hitting your cunt as he buries himself as deep as he could possibly go. “You see, I like this. Tenderizing your poor, little pussy. Making sure you walk funny after this. And now that I can do it for hours with this little toy of yours?” a raspy, breathy chuckle tickles the shell of your ear that you can hear even your own, loud cries that it’s too much, before he nips at your lobe roughly with his teeth. “I’m not done yet. Not even close,” he hisses the threat through grit teeth, his pace settling back into the usual quick-fire pounding that turns your mind to mush. his moans and growls that would usually lead to his climax hypnotizes you, and before long your whimpers of protest had melted back into moans for him to keep going. to fuck you stupid and break your fragile, human body with his cock. “That’s more like it,” he groans, grasping your hips to hold you down so he could plow, “I’m fucking you senseless, little girl. Gonna break ya, and it’s all your fault for showing me this handy, little toy.”

Animal Farm: Mondays

Male Yandere Harpies x Gender Neutral Reader (CW: Noncon, harpies, general yandere behavior, captive reader, spit roasting, cum in hair, aftercare, male harem, brief mention of being used as a cock sleeve by bull men.) Word Count: 500 (Here it is! I have had a solid wave of productivity lately answering old asks and now there is this, something I said I would do a long time ago. I said I would make a mini-fic/drabble with every group of monster men from my animal farm fic which can be found HERE.)

You sighed. It was early on Monday morning, the sun starting to stream into the window enough to disturb your sleep. You glared at your alarm clock and preemptively turned off the alarm that would go off at 10:00. It was 9:53. You wanted to cry. You had not fully recovered from Rory, Sev, and Bruc swapping you between them as a communal cock sleeve all day on Friday. You lamented your decision to be a monster man farmer with so many different species. You should have stuck to one or two. Oh well… no use crying over it now. At least you started the week off easy after your weekend break. The harpy men had pretty forgiving cocks. Ugh. Was that what it had come to? Judging how not awful your day was by the brutality of the cocks you were about to encounter? You scarfed down a quick breakfast then enjoyed your last few minutes before you were swarmed by the three harpies that called your farm home, Zan, Xilra, and Elry. They all looked similar, green and blue feathers in their hair, emerald green eyes to match, dark skin, with large angel-like wings sprouting from their backs and their legs ended in the way any bird of prey’s did. Sharp. Talons. When you stepped into the aviary your watch read exactly 10:30, you weren’t giving them a second more than you were forced to. It was like your one shred of resistance, even though it didn’t really matter very much. You also were too scared to be late after what happened the one time you were. You were sniffed out and fucked. Swiftly. As soon as you stepped into the large greenhouse-like domed building, it was like a miniature forest complete with all sorts of trees and plants, you were instantly pounced upon by the three monster men. They wasted not a single second in taking off your clothes and tossing them aside on the dirt while pinning you to the wall. “Hey come on! Those were just cleeeEEEEAAAAAANNNED. H-hey!” Two of them were biting, licking and nuzzling all over your neck while the third was using his mouth between your legs. “W-w-why do we always have to start the d-daaaay like thiiiiis??” “We love you little starling~” “Yes! And we must show you!” “We haven’t been inside you for a whole week love! It was torture~” “We must make up for the lost time sweet bird.” And that they certainly did. A week's worth of the pent up libidos of three tall harpy men unloaded on you and in you within hours. They spit roast you while you were on the ground before taking you in mid air. By the end of their breeding session with you you were exhausted. And this was supposed to be the easy day. At least they let you rest afterwards, washing the cum out of your hair and off your sore body before cuddling you and petting you while they sang sweet little bird songs and praised their darling little starling~