#i try meeting new people and they all suck. i try strengthening relationships with old people and they all get too busy or leave.
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Fix’er Upper - Part 13
Pairing: Frankie Morales x Fem! Reader
Warnings: Talk of parent death
Length: 2.1k words
Notes: Okay bitches here we go. I’ve got 3 kids doing online schooling, a desk chair that just broke while I was halfway through typing this out, a raging headache, and couldn’t be fucked to edit. I love you al, thank you for sticking with me and this little brain baby of mine. My guidance counselor from high school can suck my dick, “You’re not a creative writer, Cher, you should considering taking Home Ec as an elective instead” I digress....
Series Masterlist
"No." You glared at him and squeezed his hand harder, "You're doing that thing again.
Frankie's head whipped over to stare at you, shocked by your assertive tone.
"You're pulling away. You're stressed, out of your depth, don't know how to deal with it and so you're pulling away again-"
"You don't understand," Frankie interrupted you, shaking his head and trying to pull his hands out of your grasp. This only served to strengthen your resolve, and your grip on him.
"No." You declare again, trying to stay calm and have a mature conversation despite the tension and running emotions. "You told me to give you time to get your thoughts straight and vocalized. I can't do that if I'm not here to hear them. I can't understand your predicament if I leave. So," You moved so you're sitting cross-legged in front of him, making eye contact in an effort to show him he had your full attention. "Why don't you tell me what that phone call was about so we can start figuring it out, together."
The situation was more complex than you ever could have imagined. Frankie's ex-wife, Karla, had died. Her car had been hit by a drunk driver. Annie, thank the gods, hadn't been in the car at the time. Before she'd died at the hospital, Karla had managed to say a few words to the paramedics. At the time they didn't make sense, however, the paramedic had taken the time to write the words down and included the scrap of paper with the patient's chart. This evidence, as it turned out, had been monumental during the resulting legal battle for Annie, all of which took place without Frankie even being notified.
Child services, lawyers, extended family, and even doctors had been involved in the court proceedings. All arguing over the future of the six-year-old girl. All believing that they knew what was best for her, most believing that she should live with them, some having the gall to pretend that they weren't aware of the sizable life insurance payout she was about to receive.
Eight words. Eight simple, beautiful words whispered through the broken, bloody lips of a woman who knew she was about to die. A young girl's future was being held in suspense, and as fate would have it, a wise and sentimental judge was overseeing her case. Eight words were all it took to convince him that Annie's mother knew what was best for her own child.
"Francisco Morales. Trust with her, he's ready now."
From the time Frankie had received the phone call from Karla's family lawyer, the two of you had two days to prepare for Annie's arrival. Frankie worked his magic and erected a wall across the bedroom portion of his loft, allowing for the little girl to have some privacy but not feel like she was being closed in.
He had fretted for a least twenty five minutes over colour swatches at Hank’s Hardware before coming to the conclusion that he should leave it white and have Annie chose her room colours once she had settled in. He bought himself a new couch, as well, that would convert into a bed and serve as his bedroom for the time being.
The conversation you never had a chance to have with him was still in the back of your mind, but you understood that moving in together as a couple was hard enough. Moving in together with a kid neither of you knew, whose life had just been turned upside down against her will, would be catastrophic. Instead, you focused on being as much of a rock for Frankie as you could.
You made a trip to the city and bought girls bedding, some stuffed animals, and a few little decorations to help Annie feel like the new space was special for her. You also thought to pick up comfort food that a kid might crave, knowing that when you were six the best way to your heart was chocolate. Just before you left the city, a sign caught your attention and had you swerving to change lanes, normally you'd feel slightly bad about your obnoxious driving but today you just waved your middle finger at the rear window in a mock salute.
The flower shop had so many bouquets and you had no idea what kind of flowers the little girl might like. You also had the morbid realization that bouquets might remind her of all the flowers she surely saw at Karla's funeral. Just as you began to second guess yourself, a stand near the back caught your eye and made you smile.
The day of her arrival came quicker than you felt prepared for, never mind how Frankie must be feeling. He hadn't had too much time to worry about how having his daughter would change his life, but once the two of you were standing in his driveway doing nothing but waiting, the nerves had finally settled in. You could see deep, calming breaths he was taking as they condensed into little clouds in the freezing air.
Grabbing his clenched fist, you felt his fingers relax enough to allow your gloved ones to slide through them.
"It's going to be weird for everyone, she's probably nervous too." You weren't sure if the words were reassuring or not but nervous talking seemed to be your forte so you ran with it. "I mean, she's probably sad that she's leaving everything and everyone she's always known, excited about moving to a new place, then feeling bad that she's feeling another emotion besides grief. It can be hard to juggle loss and hope. Just show her how much you love her and be honest about why you couldn't be with her before. Kids are smart and are aware of way more than adults give them credit for."
A few moments later a black sedan slowly crept up the driveway. You wanted to stay, to meet the little girl but had the feeling that Annie and Frankie were going to need time to figure out their relationship without another person in the mix. Suddenly having a new parent was going to be hard enough on the little girl, you were afraid that she might see you as trying to replace her mom and push you away.
Rubbing Frankie's back for one last show of reassurance, you kissed his shoulder then took a few steps back. You figured this was the best way to be there to support him but also staying in the background for the time being.
Before the car could fully come to a stop, the rear door was flying open and, in a blur of movement, a little body was flying out of it towards Frankie.
You know how people will say that there are times in their lives where important moments fly by so fast they barely have time to enjoy them? Well, this wasn't one of them.
As Annie barreled her way towards Frankie, you saw in slow motion how his handsome face went from being creased with worry, to eyebrow raised shock, to breaking out in a teary smile. He had just begun to crouch down and open his arms in anticipation of holding his little girl when instead she ran right past him and locked herself in one of the sheds.
Time continued to move in slow motion, making it all the more heartbreaking watching your boyfriend's face crumple, the tears of joy turn to tears of pain as he recovered from his initial excitement and realized that his child didn't want to see him.
Tiny, muffled sobs broke the moment and brought time, and the horrible situation, back into focus. The Child Protective Services worker who had accompanied Annie from California was calling apologies to Frankie while running after the little girl, trying not to slip in the snow in her hurry.
You wanted to go to him, to lend him some form of comfort, but you were also aware that some types of grief don't appreciate witnesses. Deciding to stick around and be helpful in the background, you made your way into the loft and started making coffee and sandwiches, foreseeing a longer stay for the caseworker than initially thought.
Nearly forty minutes had passed before you emerged again with food and drinks on a tray and the two adults were still talking to Annie through the cracks in the door. She had stubbornly refused to come out, demanding that she be returned to her home at once and that she hated snow.
Once you had set down the tray and cleared the snow off a picnic table, Frankie thanked you with a kiss to your temple and introduced you to Sharon after he convinced her to take a break from the negotiations. Sharon, who had been with Annie since the day of the accident, began filling Frankie in on what had happened to his daughter in the past month between sips of coffee. He was given a folder with notes from child psychologists, doctors, a letter from her maternal grandparents, and a journal Sharon had kept that described the ways Annie had been processing her grief.
While they talked, you decided to walk over and sit next to the door of the shed, laying a wool blanket down to protect your butt from the cold. You had no idea what to say to the girl but you figured she might like to be reassured she wasn't alone. Settling down, you dug into your own sandwich and hummed quietly to yourself.
You nearly choked on your next bite when you heard a soft voice singing along with the tune you'd chosen.
"Lavender blue, dilly dilly. Rosemary Green, if you are king dilly dilly, I'll be your queen."
After you'd repeated the song twice more, you stopped the tune and said softly,
"I've never heard those lyrics before, they're different from how I learned them."
A long pause followed, making you worry that you'd offended the child back into silence.
"How do you sing it?" Came the sweetest little voice, made all the more adorable with the barest hint of a lisp.
"We always sang, 'Lavender green', for one. Which never made any sense to me so I really like how you did it-"
"Yeah, cause lavender is another name for purple," she interrupted you with a matter-of-fact tone, "saying it's green is just weird!"
"Hmmm, it might be different," you conceded, seeing the opportunity for a lesson. "But either way you sing it, it's still a really pretty song, isn't it? Things can be different but it doesn't mean one is only good and one is only bad. Each version just had different good things."
Annie went silent again but this time you didn't worry about it, you knew she was thinking about what you said and needed time to apply it to what was happening right now. You eventually heard the shifting of metal and the creak of wood and had to will yourself to sit still and calm. The way you had let her approach you had worked so far, jumping up out of excitement could possibly erase all the progress you'd made so far.
Your patience was rewarded when Annie stepped out of the shed and lowered herself so that she was sitting on the blanket right next to you. Turning your head just enough to see her in your peripheral, you noticed how dull her eyes looked. Her hair was a mess and her skin looked pale for a kid who had been living under California's sun.
"My mommy is dead."
The way it was stated as a fact, with very little emotion, broke your heart. She was so little, so young, and so unable to fully grasp what kind of future had been ripped away from her.
"I know, I'm sorry that that happened to your mom."
"That man is my daddy." She was pointing at Frankie now, who was still engrossed in his conversation with Sharon.
"He's a pretty lucky guy to have you."
"That's the lady who has been taking care of me, she's been nice."
You were a bit out of your comfort zone with the conversation but there was no way in hell you were going drop it so you cautiously trudged on. Maybe verbalizing relationships and titles was helping her process?
"I'm very happy to hear that you've been staying with someone nice. Your dad is a really nice person, too, ya know? You should see the nice bedroom he's set up for you! I even helped him bake you an apple pie. Do you like apples? Or pie?"
Her eyes went wide and a spark of happiness suddenly lit her face, making her appear more childlike than before.
"Is this an apple farm?" She practically squealed. “Like in My Little Pony?!”
Her outburst had finally drawn the attention of the other two adults, who were now only realizing that Annie had exited the shed. Frankie's heart skipped a beat at the sight of his two girls, beaming at each other. The twinge of jealousy from knowing that it had been you to draw her out was quickly squashed by how proud of you he was. He had been a little worried, although he hadn't voiced it, that his kid wouldn't take kindly to having a woman around but those fears were obviously for naught.
Part Fourteen
#Frankie Morales x fem!Reader#Frankie Morales x f!reader#Francisco Morales x fem!reader#Francisco Morales x f!reader#Frankie Catfish Morales x fem!reader#Frankie Catfish Morales x f!reader#fix'er upper#Frankie Morales#Frankie Morales fanfiction
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ALL RIGHT BUT YOU ASKED FOR IT
Power of Three as a series is just. full of weaknesses, most of which come down to poor continuity and structure. I'm not gonna try and fix ALL of those, bc that'd be laborious as hell, but I will pick out things that I feel are the most egregious as case studies.
What Po3 does have, tho, is an absolutely shining strength in the concept of its three main characters. After twelve books of Blandly Heroic Protagonist Syndrome, Jayfeather is an absolute godsend. He's angry! He's rude! He's unhappy! He's not nice. I Love Him And He's My Son. Lionblaze has his invincible pride (hah) and emergent bloodlust, and Hollyleaf has her moral absolutism and certainty. These are good starting points for characters. Sadly, the lack of continuity undermines what could have been three really good character arcs.
So! I present to you:
HOW TO MAKE "WARRIORS: THE POWER OF THREE" NOT COMPLETELY SUCK ACCORDING TO MY PERSONAL TASTE; A NON-EXHAUSTIVE, NON-CONSECUTIVE LIST BY ME
ONE
- Have there be a persistant, overarching series threat. Sol is a character with amazing villain potential who does literally nothing except hang around, and do exactly 2 Bad Things completely off-screen. This Is Not Good.
- Instead, have him be present from the second book onwards- initially introduced as a friendly but enigmatic outsider who is slowly revealed across the series to be a complete black hole of a personality, a social parasite quietly rearranging whatever community he's a part of to just-so-happen to benefit him as much as humanly possible. His "preach individualism not starclan" methods are not so much values as one strategy out of many. (to those who know me- yes i have a type. no i will not apologise.)
- Maybe his ultimate goal is to dissolve and centralise the clans or something so that he can live out his life as a political puppetmaster in all the cat-luxury he likes. idk it's hard to imagine overall stakes for this rewrite BECAUSE THE ORIGINAL DOESN'T HAVE ANY
TWO
- For gods sake you don't have a series based on the premise of "the main characters develop super powers" and then only have the second power confirmed by the end of the fourth book. I understand the first book mostly focusing on Jayfeather- his powers are obvious from the start, he's got the strongest personality of the three, he gets access to most of the prophecy plot stuff because of them. But you NEED to have the other two show an interest in something concrete happening to them beyond that, and you need to at least hint towards the other two having something unique to them even if nobody clocks it yet.
- Have Jayfeather tell his siblings about the prophecy by the end of book two at the latest. The amount of time he spends noodling around not sharing it with them is inexcusable. It's not that it's out of character for him to hang onto a secret for a bit, it's just that there's no point and it slows everything down. It would be equally in character for him to go to his siblings and be like "look, i'm SPECIAL. well you as well but ALSO ME". Boy starts off as desperate for recognition, what can I say
THREE
- Have Jayfeather discover that StarClan don't withhold signs or information on purpose for the sake of "building courage and faith" or whatever nonsense. Seeing and communicating the future is metaphysically very difficult, so interpreting signs and messages is a genuine skill, or even an art. The cats of StarClan, however, really are just ghosts, much more similar to living cats than the currently living believe. This is the impotus for Jayfeather's discarding of his reverence for StarClan, which remains consistent throughout the series.
- Have Hollyleaf and Jayfeather both still change their cat careers in the first book, but put place more attention on the fact that they basically switched jobs. Have a scene where they end up yelling at each other, because can't the other see how lucky they have it? The tension breaks when they realise they've both lost something important to them- Jayfeather his chance to prove he's as capable as a sighted cat, and Hollyleaf her path to helping her clan in the way she thinks is best. They commiserate together, and reluctantly promise to do the best they can with their lots, so they don't waste the path the other wishes they'd taken. This closeness is eroded over the series as they disagree more and more on the subject of StarClan and its role in their moral choices and obligations.
FOUR
- Speaking of Hollyleaf! I nearly threw my phone across the room when the first Omen of the Stars book claimed that Hollyleaf "worked so hard to discover her power to help her clan". Where, Ms Erins??? I would have LOVED to have seen that!! Hollyleaf expresses absolutely no concern over the details of what power she has/will develop, and only has a couple of scenes even touching on her ambitions to help her clan. She has some vague ideas about becoming leader and like one scene where she gets to do some leadery things, but that never gets followed up on. What does happen is that the whole "warrior code" thing becomes more and more a part of her personality (for no clear reason) until she snaps.
- Hollyleaf going off the deep end is something I wanted so badly to get into and be moved by, because I could see where it comes from! Her moral certainty is fascinating, especially since it's based in something as abstract as the warrior code- which, when you think about it, isn't really... anything. There's no concrete set of rules that make it up, no traditional wording or cat philosophers, not even any fables. It's a handful of agreed-upon, common sense rules- don't cross boundaries, don't take prey that isn't yours, respect your ancestors, and don't murder. That's it!
- So, combining the above points, I think Hollyleaf not being one of the Three should stay, but both the audience and the characters are given good reason to believe she is. By around the third volume, make it so that Hollyleaf has found that her power is to get cats to "Do The Right Thing"- i.e. what she wants them to do. She sneaks off often to see Sol, who teachs her how to use this power. Her siblings are concerned about this new power, having already gotten a glimpse at what Sol can do, but she's confident that she can only use this power for good. Volume-specific plot happens, Sol manipulates her into causing him to win, she is shocked and horrified, and vows to stick ridgedly to what she knows is right i.e. The Warrior Code
- However, the more fervently she tries to stick to this abstract idea, the less it gives her results, the more her power seems to be failing. Believing that StarClan is taking her power away from her, she becomes caught up in a faith-guilt spiral that puts her in the position to snap at the end of the series. By that point it's clear to her siblings that Hollyleaf has no power- she was just very, very good at persuading people to do what she wanted.
FIVE
- Lionblaze is a girl now because I Said So. This Cat Is Trans And There's Nothing You Can Do About It.
- Her relationship with Heathertail stays the same- childhood sweethearts who are torn apart as they begin to understand the nature of the societal divides that exist between them.
- This can be used to contextualise the whole "half clan/outsider blood" thing as a cultural contradiction. In reality, inter- and outer- clan relationships aren't at all rare. They can't be, otherwise the whole society would be inbred out of existence in like five generations. But if at least one society of humans can spend a good 200 years pretending Sex Is Bad And Sinful Actually then cats can have persistant cat-racism in the face of all logic. Heathertail clocks this contradiction, Lionblaze doesn't.
- Her relationship-to-power arc doesn't need changing all that much either, other than starting much sooner and being more consistent. At first, she's completely overjoyed by her power, since unlike her siblings, it lines up so well with her ambition- become the finest warrior any of the clans have to offer. As the berserker rage aspect becomes more prevelent, she becomes more and more disturbed by the fact that she isn't disturbed by what she can do, and that she doesn't want the escalation of her power to stop.
- Tigerstar still does his thing, but Brambleclaw knows about it. He recognises the signs from when his father used to visit him, and tries to train Lionblaze in his own way. She ends up caught between wanting to be a good warrior, and testing the limits of her power.
SIX
- Jayfeather can stay basically the same because he's my perfect little angy boy and nothing needs to change. His arcs can be strengthened by having a more robust relationship with Yellowfang where they try to out-bitch each other, and coming to terms with his internalised ablism. Maybe he has a chat with Mothwing about faith a couple of times. Him furiously lashing out at being offered help transitions into an acceptence and understanding of his abilities more naturally. He never stops being A Grumpy Old Man.
- All fucking past-lives unexplained time travel goes in the BIN. Doesn't fucking happen. You can have that lore dump sprinkled across the books, or come from going deep into the tunnels and having a surreal meeting. Make it properly eldritch-level scary, shake Jayfeather's confidence in the idea of them being just a bunch of ghosts.
SEVEN
- Have the way Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight present very clearly as parents to the Three be explicitly, textually unusual. One of the things I liked so much about the first series was an almost total lack of emphasis on who was mated with who, and who was related or not. It felt very real to how feral cat colonies form, where raising kittens is a communal job. This gets completely dropped the moment series 2 starts and now the cats have monogamy.
- This emphasis on the family unit and fostering close relationships between parents and kittens is deliberate on the part of both Leafpool and Squirrelflight. Their aim is to cover for Leafpool so she doesn't lose her role as medicine cat- something she already gave up Crowfeather for before she was pregnant.
- In that little bit of backstory, have a robust reason for both Leafpool and Squirrelflight to leave the camp while Leafpool is pregnant and giving birth, possibly one that ties into the present day story in some minor way. I don't know how, it would just make that element of the story a lot more ground than "we left, the kits were born, then we came back and everyone was cool with it"
- When it comes to the "I am Not your mother" reveal, Jayfeather and Lionblaze are confused and hurt that they were lied to, but come to the reasonable conclusion that well, since they were raised mostly by Squirrelflight, saw Leafpool often, and are loved by both, they don't hate her. Lionblaze has something of a crisis over being half-clan, possibly initiating an attempted reunion with Heathertail. Jayfeather is more concerned with how other cats will think it makes him lesser, something he's still sensitive too.
- Hollyleaf, meanwhile, completely fucking snaps at the way her mother Violated Part Of The Code. It's a completely irrational reaction, but expected because she's been growing more and more reliant on The Code for the whole series, and less and less stable in her attempts to aid her clan and train to be its new leader.
- Squirrelflight is the one to murder Ashfur. This is easy to work out while reading- she's literally the only one of the four with a motive who isn't a perspective character. The mystery is less around finding out who did it, and more about why she did it (it's very ambiguous as to whether it was an accident or not). The main tension comes from who finds out when.
- Lionblaze is shocked, awed by how far she'd go to protect the three of them, and reassures her she did the right thing (as a way to salve her own uncertainty over her own longing for violence). Jayfeather makes it all about himself because he's Jayfeather- upset that he didn't know immediately, instead of, you know, figuring it out in a few hours because he can basically read minds. They try their best to hide it from Hollyleaf, who is already rattling around the final volume as a full-on antagonist, but are unsuccessful. This almost costs them something incredibly important- possibly Squirrelflight's life.
EIGHT
- the whole plot with the Tribe Of Rushing Water is a MASSIVE can of worms that could be removed from the series without issue. As it is:
- Characterize the Tribe as uncertain of how to fight other cats, because yes, they haven't had to do this before. DON'T characterise them as pathetic, doing whatever their leader says without thinking, and with ancestors who have Given Up
- Have some of the Tribe be really good at the violence. Worryingly good. Have others be sickened by what they're being asked to do.
- Have some of the clan cats reflect on what they've done. Hollyleaf would be all for introducing this society to jesus The Code, but even she might be horrified at being thanked by a tribe cat who can't wait to get out there and win themselves glory, only to be killed a few hours later
- The Tribe begin a new tradition of marking the walls in the mud they use as camoflage in order to commemorate their battles, and memorialise the fallen. One of the characters reflects on the fact that in a generation or two, the Tribe will feel like it's always been this way. How many of their own traditions- those that feel almost like natural law- started out the same way?
- Have Sol as the leader of the invaders, or maybe having insinuated himself into the tribe as a "mediator" and doing his charismatic cult leader thing.
NINE
- Cinderheart isn't a reincarnation of Cinderpelt. She's just named after her bc Cinderpelt saved her mother from a badger. this is because I think the reincanation thing is stupid and I can't think of a way to make it good.
TEN
- No more using tails as hand gestures like covering people's mouths. Never. None of it. It's expunged from existence.
Disclaimer: I haven't read Omen of the Stars yet, so I can't account for anything that might happen in that series that's grounded in Po3. I'm like... two thirds of the way through the first volume. I'm Not Impressed.
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Blood Lust
silverlightqueen’s SKZ Scarefest
vampire!hyunjin x human!reader - smutty smut smut lmao, fluff, a little bit of angst ig, fwb type vibe except the benefits include Hyunjin feeding on y/n lol
Word Count: 10.4k+ (I got carried away, I’m sorry lmao)
Summary - Having a part time job whilst at university is standard, right? Babysitting, bartending, retail, hospitality? Well, y/n’s job is a little… different. Or maybe a lot different. Depends on whether you find being a hot vampire’s personal blood bag weird or not.
Warnings: biting, blood, blood consumption, unrequited love, possessiveness, toxicity in a not-relationship, unprotected sex, intercourse, rough sex and softish sex, softdom!hyunjin x sub!reader, very brief sub!hyunjin, very explicit dirty talk, asphyxiation, slight body worship, fingering, oral sex (m and f receiving), hair pulling, teasing, mouth fucking, begging, praise, hickeys, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, creampie, lots of soft aftercare, sexual and non-sexual nudity, I think that’s it but please let me know if you notice that I missed something!
a/n: and here is the fourth (and my favourite) instalment of my SKZ Scarefest! I had so much fun writing this absolute filth and I hope you guys enjoy reading it! thank you @silverlightprincess for proofreading, I love you! please be sure to check out the previous parts and keep an eye out for the next parts x
taglist: @kodzu-ken @cloudsgathering @silverlightprincess
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‘Took you long enough,’ Hyunjin says when I answer the door, and I give him an apologetic smile, making my eyes wide the way he can never resist, and I can see him fighting to keep the smile off his face. ‘Sorry. I was just… doing something,’ I say as I move aside to let him in, and he raises an eyebrow, slipping off his shoes. ‘Doing what?’ he asks, suspicious, and I avoid his gaze, locking the door after him. ‘I… um-’ ‘Let me guess. You forgot to have your iron supplements and remembered when I knocked on the door?’ he asks dryly, and I give him a weak smile, making him let out an annoyed huff.
‘y/n, I’m hungry. It’s been over a week,’ he complains, and I roll my eyes, trying to hide how endeared I always get at his complaining – he might be a big bad vampire to his clan, but he’s just a whiny little baby when he’s with me. ‘I’m sorry, Jinnie. It’s hard to remember, because I never used to take them,’ I say in my softest voice, knowing he won’t stay annoyed at me, and he just sighs, heading into the living room of my apartment. ‘And you used to wonder why you fainted all the time,’ he says exasperatedly, throwing himself down on my sofa.
When I first started at university, I was – to put it simply – broke as hell. My student loan funded my school supplies and my travel costs, and the money I earned working at my uncle’s restaurant paid for my driving lessons. I had no spare income to spend on anything else – I was still living with my parents, so I wasn’t homeless or hungry or anything. But I had no money for clothes, or nights out, or… anything other than the basic necessities.
When it got to the start of second year, and my uncle had to close his restaurant because he was getting a few customers a night if he was lucky (at every family gathering, he gets drunk and rambles about how Uber Eats murdered his business), I was desperate; I couldn’t pay for my driving lessons anymore, and I was having to buy a lot more supplies for school. One of my friends, Yeji, knew that I was struggling with money, and decided to confide in me about an arrangement she had with a friend of hers.
Her friend, Chan, was the leader of a vampire clan, she’d told me, and she was his blood donor. They’d meet a couple times a week, and he’d feed on her and pay her for it. I was fascinated – I knew vampires existed, but I never knew one personally, or knew anyone that knew one either, so to hear about Yeji’s arrangement astounded me. According to Yeji, vampires tend to drink from blood bags rather than from humans these days, but they still prefer blood from the source. So when Chan had offhandedly mentioned to Yeji that he was looking for a blood donor, she asked how much he was willing to pay. When she heard, she instantly offered to be his donor, knowing that that much money per feed would fund the rest of her university life after just a couple weeks.
I’d had so many questions for her. When I asked if it hurt, she told me the initial puncture felt a little like an injection, and then after that, she wouldn’t really feel anything other than it being a little uncomfortable to hold her neck at such an awkward angle. It would leave her feeling drowsy and weak, but Chan would feed her a little of his blood, just to strengthen her, and she would feel back to herself within no time. The two little scars on her neck would take a while to fade, but she said they were easy enough to cover up with makeup. I’d heard that being fed on was pleasurable, and almost sexual, but when I mentioned that to Yeji, she grimaced and said that it wasn’t at all like that. For her and Chan, it was a business transaction between good friends, and nothing more.
I was intrigued, to say the least, and I’d gone home that night thinking about the possibility of becoming a blood donor to a vampire. The next day, Yeji had run up to me excitedly, to tell me that one of Chan’s clan members was looking for a donor. Only a week later, I was waiting to meet him at a coffee shop, as though it was a blind date. I felt so nervous, worried that he’d take one look at me and walk straight back out. But the second he walked in and his eyes met mine, my heart stopped.
He was adorable, painfully so – with his soft brown hair falling over his cute glasses, and his light academia boyfriend aesthetic. He looked around my own age, but Yeji had told me that he was, in fact, 318 years old at the time (we celebrated his 320th birthday just a few months ago). He sat down with a shy smile, and I was lost for words. He had none of the pale skin or brooding moody looks or all black outfits – he was quite tanned with a friendly face and dressed in soft neutrals. I couldn’t believe that this harmless looking soft boy was a blood-sucking vampire. There was no way.
He bought us a coffee each, and bought me a caramel shortbread because, he told me shyly, it looked as sweet as me. We spoke for hours, our conversation quickly changing from generic and awkward, to comfortable and deep. I explained how difficult it was to fund life at university without putting pressure on my low-income parents to support me, and he explained his life as a vampire. We left the coffee shop at closing time, Hyunjin insisting on walking me home, and we parted with the decision that I would become his blood donor.
We met again, only a week later, with the same shy smiles and slightly awkward conversation. This time, I’d gone to the house that he shared with some of the clan members, but nobody else was at home. It was just us. We’d slowly worked up to it, and when Hyunjin was stood before me, neck bent so that his mouth brushed against the skin of my throat, I felt relaxed and prepared due to his gentle comforting and support. I tried my hardest not to tense when I felt his fangs puncture my skin, wincing a little at the sharp pain, but before I had time to get used to the feeling of someone drinking my blood, Hyunjin had pulled away, coughing up all my blood over his hoodie.
‘What’s the matter? Are you okay?’ I’d asked, and Hyunjin had wiped at his mouth, face twisted in disgust. ‘y/n, I’m really sorry, but your blood is… gross,’ he’d said bluntly, still coughing between each word. This had hurt more than you’d expect – somehow, it’s not a nice feeling to hear that a vampire finds your blood disgusting enough to cough it all back up. ‘Oh. I’m really sorry,’ I’d said, feeling humiliated, and Hyunjin had waved his hand in the air, swigging down some water. ‘No, don’t apologise. I just… I was just surprised. Do you not know you’re anaemic?’ he’d asked, and I’d blinked at him in surprise. ‘Anaemic?’ I’d echoed, and he’d nodded, an amused smile playing at his lips. ‘Your blood has, like, no iron in it. Drinking your blood was like… drinking bitter coffee. Just how you’d add milk and sugar to coffee, your blood needs iron.’
He’d left me in his room whilst he went to get me some iron supplements, and I’d eaten two of the gummy vitamins when he’d handed them to me. We’d waited for half an hour, and then we’d tried it again, sat on his bed this time. His fangs slid into the two little holes they’d made earlier, not as painful this time around, and he didn’t pull away this time either, instead pulling me closer with his strong arms. It was a weird sensation, not a… nasty one, but just weird. With each hungry gulp he took, I’d felt myself getting drowsier and drowsier, head becoming light, and my eyes slid shut after around thirty seconds.
I’d felt Hyunjin pull away only a few moments after that, and he’d shook me lightly, just to keep me awake. ‘Let me feed you some of my blood,’ he’d murmured gently, lifting his wrist to his mouth and piercing the skin. He’d held his wrist to my mouth then, and I’d gently sucked at his skin, tasting the metallic tang of his blood on my tongue. Seconds later, I felt wide awake, like nothing had happened at all.
For the next year, I went to his house twice a week for a few hours at a time. We’d usually watch a film or play a video game or just sit on our phones together in his room, when he wasn’t drinking my blood, of course. It didn’t take me long to realise he wasn’t exactly the shy soft boy I met that first day. Don’t get me wrong – he was still a little quiet sometimes, awkward and clumsy, a total scaredy cat, and he’d be shy around new people. But after a few weeks, once he was much more comfortable around me, different elements of his personality came out too. He was flirty and bratty and sassy and he could be a total whore – he loved his loose comfy clothes, but he also loved his tighter-than-skin jeans and slightly see-through shirts, leather and silk and expensive cotton blends, in black and navy tones. But he was also sensitive and emotional, thoughtful and sweet. It was soon obvious to me that he was multi-dimensional as a person, complex with so many levels, and I’d wanted nothing more than to get to know them all.
I met the majority of his clan members over that time, and they were all just as nice as Hyunjin. I spent a lot of time with them, because Yeji and our friends were friends with them too. We went to parties together, had a lot of movie nights or ordered takeout together at their clan house, meaning I spent more time with Hyunjin than I did with anyone else, which did nothing for my hopeless crush on him. But I didn’t mind that my attraction to him wasn’t reciprocated because we were slowly becoming best friends.
He was always so careful with me, so gentle, like I was an antique vase or a fine china teacup. He’d hold me close to him with a firm grip, and he’d take slow and steady gulps, never making more than two punctures in my skin when he fed on me. He would never have us sitting in one position for too long or feed on me for more than two minutes at a time – when he was particularly hungry, he’d feed on me three or four times in one sitting, but only for two minutes at a time. When he’d pull away, there was never any blood around his mouth like you see in the films, and no blood staining my neck either. He was clean and careful, always cautious of hurting me, and I was so grateful for that. Sometimes I’d run into Yeji at the house, after Chan had fed on her, and every now and then, she’d have blood all over her neck and shoulder or her clothes and hair would be a mess from Chan losing his composure and being a little rougher with her than usual. I would thank God each time, so lucky that Hyunjin treated me like a fragile doll.
After a year, I’d made enough money from being his donor – or, as Jisung loved to call me, Hyunjin’s personal blood bag – that I could put a deposit down on an apartment. I’d told my parents that I was working as an assistant at an accountancy firm when I didn’t have any lectures or seminars at university, which is why I was making so much money, and that Hyunjin was the only co-worker my own age, which is why I was with him so much. I moved into an apartment block around ten minutes from the clan house, on the same floor as Chaeryeong, and Hyunjin helped me move in. A couple of the other clan boys chipped in too so that, and I quote, ‘you have to let us stay with you when we want a break from the clan’.
Only a month after living at the apartment, I’d woken up in the middle of the night to someone hammering at the door. I’d jumped out of bed, dressed in just a little vest and satin shorts, arms and legs bare, stepping into my slippers as I rushed to the door. I’d had my phone in my hand and had typed in the number for the emergency services, ready to phone them if this was someone trying to rob me, and I’d opened the door carefully. Before I could even process what was going on, Hyunjin had burst in and thrown himself at me, pulling me into his arms and burying his head in my neck, my legs instinctually wrapping around his waist to keep myself steady.
‘Jin, are you oka-’ ‘I’m really fucking drunk, and all I could think about was you, and how hot you are, and how fucking amazing your blood is, and how much I wanna drain you dry, so I ditched the boys because I missed you too fucking much,’ he’d growled in my ear, making my eyes widen in shock and my underwear dampen embarrassingly quickly. He’d chuckled, taking a deep breath, before whispering, ‘judging by the sweet smell coming from your pussy, doll, I think you like the sound of that too.’
He’d kicked the door shut behind him and, with his vamp speed, we were in my bedroom only a few moments later, the vampire boy dropping me onto the bed and climbing over me instantly. ‘Listen, y/n, I’m not exaggerating when I say that I’m really, really drunk. Like… I’m wasted,’ he’d murmured into the skin of my neck, hands roughly trailing up and down the sides of my body. ‘I can tell,’ I’d replied breathlessly, hands tangled into his soft black locks, fluffy and messy around his forehead. ‘Which means… I’m not gonna be able to hold back. I probably won’t be gentle like I always am, because that always takes a lot of self-control, which I don’t… really have at the moment. So if you need me to stop, say… werewolf,’ he’d said against my skin, saying the last word with disdain. The werewolves and vampires had always had a long-standing rivalry, and he was obviously aware that the word would pull him out of any desire-filled reverie.
He hadn’t even given me a moment to reply before he’d sunk his teeth into my neck, rough and harsh, and I’d let out a gasp into his ear, his hands gripping onto my waist. He’d sucked at my neck, drinking my blood desperately, and I could feel it dripping down my shoulder and chest. And usually, when I wouldn’t be able to feel anything because of how gentle he was, all I could feel was pleasure, pure hot pleasure flooding through my veins. It was heavenly, and I’d let out little moans and whimpers into his ear, making him even more desperate, with my hands on his back, nails digging in through his thin white shirt.
It wasn’t long before his big veiny hands were wandering eagerly around my body, one palming at my breast and rolling the hard nipple between his fingertips, the other slipping under my shorts and pressing against my clothed core, my wetness having seeped through my underwear. He’d moved away from my neck and looked down at me with ruby red eyes, his jet black hair a sweaty mess and my blood dripping down his chin in harsh red lines. ‘Fuck, y/n, you’re so fucking hot. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this,’ he’d growled, his pointed fangs on full display, making my chest tighten with desire. ‘Can I fuck you, doll? I need you so fucking bad right now,’ he’d asked lowly, hands both stilling against my body, and I’d instantly replied, ‘yes, Hyunjin, please.’
Now, another year later, it’s pretty common that we fuck when he feeds on me. I found out that it was so difficult for him to feed on me as gently as he used to, desperate to just throw me against a wall and drain me of every drop. But when I’d look at him nervously with my ‘big innocent eyes’, he knew he couldn’t hurt me. But that night, we’d found out that messy and rough feeding just felt… so much better. We’d also found out a lot of other things since that night; Hyunjin loves biting me in places other than my neck – my boobs and the insides of my thighs are his personal favourites – and I love it when he’s fucking me and bites me just as I’m about to cum – it heightens the pleasure a thousand times, making me see white and scream his name out like it’s being torn from my throat.
But, to my slight disappointment, sex is all it is. We’re like friends with benefits, but the benefits include feeding on me as well as sex. A lot of other things have changed though. Hyunjin practically lives at the apartment now – he sleeps here 4 or 5 nights a week. It’s like we share the apartment; he’s got as many of his belongings here as I do. I don’t mind it, though. He is pretty much my best friend, so spending time together is enjoyable, even if it means I’m falling more and more for him. Hyunjin’s paid me enough over the past couple years for me to be able to do my master’s degree, and I also managed to get a part time job at the coffee shop where Hyunjin and I first met, so it doesn’t feel like I’m solely relying on the money he gives me (it’s enough to fund me, but I don’t want him to think I’m like his little blood bag and nothing more – I basically am but we won’t talk about that).
This last week, though, I went away with the girls for a little last minute break to Rome (we’d planned to go for two weeks but then we would’ve missed Jackson’s Halloween party in a few days, and it’s already being called the party of the year, so we decided to just go for a week), and so he’s had to drink from blood bags whilst I was gone. He was sending me all these sad snapchats of him pouting with a straw in his mouth, wishing he was drinking from me instead – I think he wanted me to react to it with pity, but instead it was just turning me on. I landed back a couple hours ago, and I forgot to have my iron supplement vitamins when I arrived at the apartment, so he’s right – I had them when he knocked on the door.
I look down at him, sprawled out on his side of the sofa, his black locks a stark contrast against the grey cushions. He looks like such a boyfriend, dressed in a thin white t-shirt and a pair of grey joggers, white socks on his feet, glasses on his face and a silver chain around his neck. He looks up at me with a small grin on his face, eyes scanning my body. ‘You look hot, doll,’ he smirks, and I feel my cheeks heating up. I’m only in comfy travel clothes but he’s looking at me like I’m dressed up to the nines. ‘Thank you, Jin,’ I reply, sitting down beside him and letting him pull my legs across his lap.
‘I’m being serious. You look all glowy. And you’ve tanned a little. Did you have fun?’ he asks, hands skimming up and down my legs. ‘I loved it, Jin. We should go together. Everything was so beautiful. The sights are amazing, the weather is gorgeous, the food is delicious, the people are so lovely. The vibes there are just perfect. You’d love it,’ I tell him, and he just watches me as I speak, a small smile on his plump lips. ‘You’ll have to take me one day, angel,’ he murmurs, and I nod, unable to keep the shy smile from my face.
‘I saw on Ryujin’s story,’ he begins, and I knew this was coming, my heart sinking a little as he continues, ‘that you guys made friends with the people staying in the hotel room next to you. What were they like?’ ‘They were nice. We didn’t actually speak to them ‘til the fourth day, then we had dinner and drinks together on the fifth day, went sightseeing together on the sixth, and shopping together on the seventh. But, yeah, they were okay. They were a bit too… boisterous and noisy for my liking, but the girls got on with them, so I didn’t mind spending time with them,’ I explain honestly, and he just nods, looking like he still has more questions. ‘How many of them were there?’ ‘There were eight boys, and four of them brought their girlfriends. I got along better with their girlfriends than them, to be honest,’ I say lightly, Hyunjin just looking at me unreadably. ‘So you spent a few days in Rome with four single guys?’ he asks, voice tight, and I let out a gentle sigh.
‘Jin, do-’ ‘Answer the question, y/n.’ ‘Yes, we did. Is that a problem, Jin?’ ‘No, y/n, it’s not. Or, at least, it wouldn’t be, if you weren’t covered in a scent that isn’t yours,’ he says evenly, and my eyes widen. ‘I’m covered in someone else’s scent? Well… it must be Yuna’s, because we shared a bed. Or Lia’s – I wore her hoodie on the flight ba-’ ‘No, y/n. I’ve spent enough time with Yuna and Lia to know what they smell like. That’s not the scent on you. You smell like a human boy. So stop lying and tell me why,’ he says, voice tight, and I sigh. ‘Jin, I’m not lying. I didn’t, like, sleep with any of them, if that’s what you’re worried about.’ ‘Then why do you smell like a human boy?’ he asks slowly, obviously trying to keep his composure, and I take a deep breath.
‘I was sat next to one of them on the flight back, and he fell asleep. His head fell on my shoulder a couple times, and I felt bad to wake him up, so I just le-’ ‘You just what, y/n? You let a random human boy sleep on you? Get his scent all over you?’ he demands, hands tightening on my legs and veins protruding from beneath his honey skin. ‘Are you being serious right now, Jin?’ ‘Yes, I am. You can’t just let random human boys get their scent all over you.’ ‘And why not?’ I demand, voice shaky with anger as I take my legs off his lap, and he glares at me. ‘Because I pay you a lot of money to feed on you, and I don’t want anyone else getting near what’s mine,’ he growls, butterflies exploding in my stomach when his eyes glow red.
‘But I’m not yours, Jin. You pay me to feed on me. That’s all. There was no agreement that I would stay away from any other boy!’ I exclaim, shocked at how ridiculous he’s being and trying to ignore how much my body is aching for him, and he scoffs. ‘You don’t need any other boy. I give you all the companionship you need, I fund you so you buy anything you want, and I keep you satisfied. That’s all you need,’ he says simply, and my mouth falls open slightly. ‘What if I wanted a boyfriend? An actual relationship with a boy who loves me?’ I ask, giving him a chance to say what I so want him to say, and his eyes flash momentarily before he says, ‘you don’t want a relationship.’ ‘What if I did?’ ‘We’ll cross that bridge when it comes to it. But, for now, you’re mine, y/n, and you know it. I don’t want you getting any other boys’ scents on you again, understood?’ he asks, and I just stare at him in shock, unable to believe how unreasonably he’s behaving.
He gives me a few seconds to reply and when I don’t, he moves so quickly I don’t even realise what’s happened until he’s hovering over me, my back pressing into the sofa, and his hand is pressed to my throat tightly. ‘I asked you if you understand,’ he says lowly, eyes glowing red and fangs glinting in the mellow light of the lamp, threateningly sharp. ‘No, Jin, I don’t. I don’t understand why I should have to stay away from other boys,’ I whisper, heart nearly beating out of my chest, and he lets out a harsh scoff. ‘Because you don’t need them. You only need me,’ he growls, tightening his grip on my throat, and I let out a little gasp of surprise, already feeling a slight dizziness in my head.
‘You only want me, too,’ he whispers, ducking his head so that his soft lips move against the skin over my collarbones, releasing my throat and moving his hand to hold my waist instead. ‘You think I don’t know that? You think I don’t know how much you want me, doll? You forget how well I know you, much better than you can ever know yourself. I can sense your every thought, your every feeling – I can smell it on you. The way the serotonin rolls off you in waves when you look at me, the way you drip with dopamine when we touch, the way I feel like I’m drunk on your endorphins whenever I’m around. My presence makes you want me, angel, and we both know it,’ he murmurs softly between gentle kisses, fluffy hair tickling against my cheek, and all I can feel, more with each word, is complete and utter humiliation. Never once has he – or any of the other vampires I see on a daily basis – told me that they can do that – can sense humans’ emotions.
He lets out a gentle chuckle, pushing himself up on one forearm to look down at me with a half-smirk. ‘Don’t be embarrassed, doll. I love it – I really fucking love it – that you want me as much as I want you. As much as I’ve always wanted you, since the first moment I set eyes on you. It consumes me, angel, how much I want you,’ he admits, not looking me in the eyes as his hand slowly makes its way up from my waist to brush my hair back from my face, and the butterflies in my stomach are unbearable. ‘How much do you want me?’ I ask without thinking, the words coming out as a whisper, and his eyes flit up to meet mine, both of us silent as I wait for him to speak, hoping to God he’s going to say he wants me just as much as I want him – more than just sexually. ‘More than you can ever know, princess,’ he murmurs, sparkly brown eyes locking with mine, and my heart jumps at the nickname he so rarely calls me – I’m doll every day, angel when he’s in the mood, but I’m only princess every now and then, when his eyes sparkle the way they are now, like he’s looking at the universe and it’s reflected back in those beautiful brown eyes.
‘Let me… let me show you?’ he whispers, the words coming out slightly questioning, and I can’t help the small smile that spreads across my lips, despite not hearing quite what I wanted to. I slide my hand around the back of his neck, fingers pressing into his soft skin as I pull him down to me, eyes sliding shut as his lips meet mine. I never used to understand the hype over kissing. I never had any of the fireworks, the passion, the clashing tongues and teeth like you read in books and see in films. I only ever kissed one boy, once, and it was quite awkward – he practically tried to suck off my face from the get-go, his hands clamped on my shoulders. But Hyunjin, god, is he good at kissing? I could kiss him for the rest of my life, with his soft plump lips and his hands trailing all over my body.
He barely waits a second before parting my lips with his, tongue sliding into my mouth without a moment of hesitation and his big hand pressing against my waist. I tangle my hands into his hair, soft locks sliding between my fingers, and I wrap my legs around his waist, pulling him closer to me, as close as physically possible. Before I even have a chance to start feeling uncomfortable, I feel a rush a movement, and not even a few seconds later, I’m on my bed beneath him, our lips still pressed together.
He turns us over, my body laid on top of his, and I forget momentarily that my weight atop him is nothing in comparison to the kind of weight he can carry. I practically melt into him, my body melding into the curves and contours of his body, fitting us together like puzzle pieces. He slides his hands into my hair, the feeling of his fingers against my scalp making me let out a soft whine. ‘You’re fucking perfect, doll,’ he groans against my lips, my entire body tingling as our mouths move in sync, slow and passionate, not nearly as rushed and desperate as usual. His touches are gentle, careful and tender, where he usually holds me in a bruisingly tight grip, rough and possessive.
I slide my hands under his t-shirt tentatively, and he doesn’t even hesitate to sit up, breaking away from me momentarily as I pull the top over his head, throwing it over my shoulder as he reattaches his lips to mine. I slide my hands over his torso, fingers roaming over the ridges of his hard abs, his skin radiating heat. Vampires might have no circulation but the rumour about them being freezing cold all the time is false – their body temperature automatically regulates to the temperature around them, meaning he’s just as hot as I am right now.
His hands slide under my shirt, and we break apart again for him to pull it over my head, instantly leaning down to suck at the exposed skin of my breasts as he cups them, big hands covering them completely. I let out gentle whines, head falling back, and one of his hands comes to rest at the base of my exposed throat, asserting his dominance – I might be on top of him right now, but we both know who’s in charge here.
He doesn’t wait long before turning us over, kissing me for a few more moments before he climbs off me, standing at the foot of the bed. He gently grabs my ankles, pulling me down the bed, and I let out a gentle giggle, a smile on his face at the sound. He pulls off my socks, momentarily tickling the underside of one foot, and a startled laugh is forced out of me as I kick at his hand to make him stop. He reaches for the drawstring of my joggers with a grin, tugging it open deftly and pulling them down my legs swiftly.
My black underwear isn’t anything special, just a plain cotton bra and my high-waisted comfy granny pants, but his eyes trawl over my body like I’m in the finest lingerie, the bulge in his joggers becoming a little more noticeable, making my mouth water embarrassingly quickly – I could live on my knees for Hyunjin if that’s what he wanted me to do. His eyes meet mine, a small smirk on his lips as he drops to his knees, pulling me further down the bed so that my legs are slung over his broad shoulders, heels resting against his strong back.
His hands grab at my pants, ripping them away from my body effortlessly, reminding me again of just how strong he is – he could literally crush my neck without a single hair of his moving out of place. He spreads my legs further, eyes locked onto my core, and he lets out a gentle groan. ‘Fuck, so wet for me, angel,’ he murmurs, running a finger over my slit, a desperate whimper falling from my lips. ‘I don’t need prepping – just want you, Jin,’ I murmur, and he lets out a gentle chuckle. ‘That’s the spirit, doll, but I don’t wanna rip you in half. We’ll see how well you take my fingers first,’ he says amusedly, not giving me a second to reply before he plunges a finger into me.
I gasp loudly, but the pleasure disappears with his finger which he lifts to his lips, eyes locked with mine as he licks his finger clean of my essence. His eyes flutter shut momentarily as he lets out a low moan, my pussy flooding at the sound. ‘You taste amazing, so fucking sweet. This pussy was made for me to eat, wasn’t it, angel?’ he asks, and when I take a second to reply, he raises an eyebrow, prompting me. ‘Yes, Jin, only for you,’ I reply hastily, and a satisfied smile spreads across his lips.
His finger slips between my folds again, and he doesn’t give me a second to react before he adds another, trying to work me open a little. ‘You’re so tight, doll. And you said you didn’t need prepping,’ he laughs, curling his long fingers inside me, making me clench around him. He slowly pumps in and out of me, rocking his hand against me gently, and I let out moan after moan at this completely foreign feeling. He’s always so quick, so desperate to have me fall apart on his hand as fast as I could, but this? This is different, this is slow, heavenly, like he wants me to enjoy this blissful feeling.
He adds another finger, just about fitting inside me, and I throw my head back against the bed, back arching up as I let out a loud moan of his name. ‘Fuck, angel, you’re killing me. Love your pretty moans,’ I hear him murmur, his voice just about breaking through the pleasure that rolls over me like waves crashing, and his thumb appears at my clit, rubbing slow circles that make me whimper desperately. I look down at him, stomach turning when I realise he’s been watching me, eyes studying my face for my reactions as his fingers work their magic, and I can barely maintain his eye contact, hearing him chuckle when my head falls back, mouth falling open in a moan.
His fingers disappear from inside me after a few minutes, giving me a momentary reprieve from the overwhelming pleasure as he moves closer to me, warm breath fanning out over my core. ‘Oh, god,’ I moan out when he licks a long stripe up my slit without warning. My hands instantly reach down to tangle into his hair, tugging at the locks as he sucks at my clit with his plump lips, making my toes curl. He flicks his tongue over my folds, whimpers spilling from my lips as I squirm, and Hyunjin puts one arm over my waist, pressing down to hold me in place.
He pokes his tongue between my folds, gently pushing into my core, and my mouth falls open into a silent scream when he begins to slowly rub at my clit with his thumb, my legs slamming into his back and pulling him even closer, as close as possible, his head completely buried between my legs. Wet and obscene slurping sounds drown out my desperate moans, and Hyunjin begins to let out grunts and groans against me, lapping at me like a man possessed.
I feel myself getting closer, the knot in my stomach tightening as Hyunjin sucks at my clit, pushing two fingers into me and pumping them at a mind-numbing pace. ‘Gonna cum for me, angel?’ he hums against me, and I can’t even muster up the sanity to reply, just moaning out his name, and he lets out a low chuckle before flicking his tongue over my sensitive bud, fingers curling against the spongy spot inside me. I tense up completely, head pressed back into the bed as I call out his name in a moan, releasing all over his hand and tongue. He works me through my orgasm, gently rocking his hand against me as he laps at my folds. ‘God, you taste amazing,’ he murmurs once I’ve come down from my high, licking the last bit of my release from his fingers, and it takes all my effort to lock my eyes with his as he does so, his lips quirking up into a smirk.
And then he lifts his wrist to his mouth, and I know what’s coming, stomach turning with excitement as he bites down into the skin. When he pulls his wrist away from his mouth, I push myself up onto my hands shakily, leaning forward to his wrist that he holds out to me, blood blooming from the smallest little wounds in his skin. I hold his arm to my mouth, sucking at the dots of blood, the metallic taste exploding on my tongue, and not a second after swallowing it down, I feel my energy coming back, regaining my strength quickly.
He pulls his arm away after a few seconds, his focus returning to between my legs, but when he lowers his head, his lips land on my inner thigh rather than my pussy, and I brace myself for the initial sting. His sharp fangs puncture into my soft thigh, the smallest sharp pain making me wince, but it quickly disappears when he hungrily gulps down my blood, messy and desperate. He lets out groans against my thigh, my blood dripping down my skin as he drinks me like a man starved, and I can already feel myself weakening, the pleasure making my head light and dizzy. He lifts his arm up again after a few moments, the two tiny puncture wounds still bleeding, and I lick it up, the weakness disappearing instantly.
He pulls away after around a minute, my blood dripping down his chin in two lines from the corners of his mouth, as though he’s greedily taken more of me into his mouth than he could handle, and he smirks at me as I wipe it up, putting my now bloodstained finger to his lips. He licks my finger in one swift motion, eyes closing as he savours the taste. ‘It’s not fair, angel. You shouldn’t have such a sweet pussy and delicious blood. You’ve got the whole package,’ he murmurs lightly, making me laugh as he rises from his knees, a small smile playing at his lips.
He looks down at me, dark eyes flitting over my body, and I feel conscious under his intimidating gaze. He seems to sense that I want to curl in on myself, shield my body from his view, and he gives me a soft smile. ‘You’re so fucking beautiful, y/n, and you don’t even know it. You’re heavenly, angel,’ he murmurs softly, holding out a hand to me, and I take it, letting him pull me up from the bed and into his arms. He holds me so tenderly, so gently, that I can’t help but bury my head into his chest, his soft and floral scent flooding my senses.
‘Gonna let me fuck you, angel?’ he asks, voice low, and I take a step back from him, a small smile on my face. ‘Wanna suck your dick first,’ I reply, his eyes darkening instantly, and I can’t help the grin on my face when he groans, ‘you’re one of a fucking kind.’ I take his hand into mine, pulling him around to the side of the bed. I kneel on the bed, hands on his shoulders to steady myself, and once I’m comfortable, I pull the drawstring on his joggers open, slipping my hands under to push them halfway down his thighs. He’s wearing a pair of plain black boxers, his bulge straining against the material, but I don’t pull them down just yet, instead moving my attention to his torso.
He’s so perfect, sculpted by the Gods, and I can’t help but admire his body every time I see it, hands running up his stomach and chest, and over his big shoulders. I bring my lips up to his collarbone, kissing and sucking to leave a mark, threading my hands into the hair at the nape of his neck. He waits patiently, hands on my waist, lips letting out gentle sighs every now and then, and I can’t help but respect his self-control. He’s always so patient, putting me before himself, and I can’t even imagine how difficult it must be for him.
I take pity on him after a little while, moving from his neck and looking up at him with a small smile as my hands trail down to his underwear. I slip my hands beneath the waistband, pulling his boxers down just enough for his hard length to spring up against his stomach, Hyunjin letting out a gentle hiss. He’s so long with a perfect curve (he has the most beautiful cock I’ve ever seen), and his head is painfully swollen and red, the tip leaking with milky white precum. My mouth waters at the sight.
I lean down and press a kiss to the tip, tongue sliding out to taste some of his precum, and he lets out a shaky breath. I spread his wetness down his length with one hand, his hands coming to tangle into my hair. I place my tongue at the base, licking up to the tip against the vein on the underside of his cock, and he tenses as I do so, gripping my hair tightly. I take his head into my mouth, swirling my tongue around him as my hands slowly rub the rest of his length. I look up at him through my lashes as I take him further into my mouth, feeling him hit the back of my throat, and his head falls back, a soft moan falling from his lips.
I gradually build my pace, steadily bobbing my head on him and taking him as far in as possible. ‘Such a good girl, doll,’ he groans, gentle moans falling from his lips more and more often now, and I know it isn’t going to be long before he loses all control. I’m just beginning to adjust to having him hit the back of my throat with each bob of my head when his hips start twitching, and he begins thrusting into my mouth, controlling my head movements with his hands fisted into my hair. All I can do I grab onto the backs of his thighs as he fucks my mouth, my eyes beginning to water. His tip hits the back of my throat harshly, and I gag around him loudly, making him curse as he bucks into my throat.
‘Swallow,’ he instructs, voice not nearly as gentle and soft as a few minutes ago, and I try my best to do so, my throat contracting around him in noisy gags. ‘Come on, doll, you can take me further than that,’ he says teasingly, before pulling my head forward, his cock pushing down my throat and my lips wrapped around the base of his cock, and he can barely thrust back and forth because of how tight my throat is around him, desperately gagging to push him back out. Tears stream down my face, saliva running down my chin, and my choked gags and desperate breaths mingling with his soft grunts and whispered words of comfort in the air.
I can feel him getting closer, his cock twitching in my throat, and I ready myself to feel his hot release hit the back of my throat, but he pulls me off him with a loud sigh, looking down at me with tender eyes. He wipes the saliva from my face with gentle fingers, tilting my head up to kiss away the tear tracks that stain my skin, hand stroking my hair soothingly. ‘Always so good for me, angel. Gonna let me fuck you now?’ he asks, our eyes locked together, and I nod eagerly. ‘Please, Jin, want you,’ I breathe out, throat hoarse, and he grins, pressing his lips to mine in a brief kiss.
‘Lie down for me,’ he says, and I do so, watching as he pulls his joggers and boxers down his legs and kicking them away impatiently before he joins me on the bed, hovering over me. ‘You’re still in your bra, doll. This won’t do,’ he grins, slipping a hand beneath my body to expertly unclasp my bra. I pull it off me quickly, throwing it off to the side as Hyunjin ducks his head, flicking his tongue across one nipple as he rolls the other between his fingers, toying and tugging at it gently. I let out a gentle whimper, tangling my fingers into his hair, and he lets out a gentle chuckle. ‘Want me to bite you, angel?’ he asks teasingly, and I let out a low moan as confirmation, feeling his sharp fangs slide into the soft flesh of my breast not a moment later.
I gasp loudly, pleasure flooding through my veins as he swallows down my blood hungrily, the heady haze of bliss settling over me more and more with each gulp. Whimpers and moans fall from my lips every few seconds, my hands in his hair pulling him closer and closer, one of his big hands gripping onto my waist, fingers rubbing against my skin comfortingly. He doesn’t drink a lot this time, having had more than enough from my thigh, so I don’t feel too weak, but he still feeds me a little of his blood when he’s done, making me smile up at him.
‘Are you sure you still want me to fuck you? Have you got enough energy?’ he asks softly, brushing my hair back from my face, and I nod, leaning up to press a kiss to his lips. ‘I want it, Jinnie. I want you,’ I whisper against his lips, and I feel him grin, resting on one forearm as he rubs his head against my folds teasingly. ‘Jin… please,’ I breathe out, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, and he lets out a low chuckle. ‘I like hearing you beg, doll,’ he murmurs, smile playing at his lips as he continues running his head up and down my folds, tapping the tip against my clit every few seconds, the wetness gushing from my core soaking him. ‘Please, Jin, need you to fuck me, fill me up with your cock, bite me and drain me dry, need it so bad,’ I plead pathetically, and his eyes darken at my words, the boy letting out a gentle ‘fuck’.
He sinks into me slowly, and I gasp as he inches in, enjoying the burning stretch and gripping onto his strong shoulders as I wrap my legs around his waist, pulling him closer to me with my ankles locked together. He lets out a low groan when he bottoms out, our bodies lined up perfectly, and he brings his hand up to my mouth, slipping two fingers past my lips. I roll my tongue around them as he gives me a moment to stop clenching around him and adjust to the stretch. He pushes his fingers a little further in, making me gag around them, and I shoot him evils, Hyunjin trying to look apologetic, but failing miserably and looking amused instead.
‘Can I- fuck, angel, you gotta stop clenching, gonna make me cum. Can I move? Doll, please, I need to move,’ he pleads, the words coming out as a low whine, and I feel a thrill in my stomach. I can’t help but feel pride at being able to make Hyunjin – someone so dominant – whiny and submissive because he’s that desperate to fuck me. I hum out permission around his fingers, and he pulls all the way out before pushing back in, slow and deep, the drag of his cock against my walls making us both moan. ‘Fuck, so tight, angel. So wet and tight. Fucking love this pussy, doll,’ he growls as he fucks into me, dark eyes locked with mine as I moan around his fingers.
‘How’d you want it, y/n? Want me to fuck you slow, doll, or so hard you can’t walk tomorrow?’ he asks in a low voice, hips stilling as he pulls his fingers out of my mouth, and I let out a gentle whine, not quite sure what I want. ‘Anything, Jin, just need you,’ I whisper breathlessly, and he grins a cocky grin, his ego satisfied. His hand comes to the base of my throat, pads of his fingers resting against my blood vessels, and he pulls out, leaving me feeling empty, before slamming all the way back in, knocking all of the air out of me in a desperate moan, his balls slapping against my ass.
‘You were only gone a week but, fuck, I missed you so fucking much. Missed your sweet pussy and your sweet blood, angel. Couldn’t stop myself from jacking off to the thought of this tight, wet little cunt, doll,’ he growls against my ear, his hand at my throat tightening just a little, and I let out a pathetic whimper in reply, his words sending a fresh wave of arousal gushing out of me, coating his thighs and abdomen. ‘So wet, doll, gushing around me. Did you miss my cock, angel?’ he asks between thrusts, my hands tangling into his soft locks, gripping tightly. ‘Missed your cock so much, Jin. Wanted you so fucking bad while I was gone. Never wanna leave you again,’ I try to say, half of it coming out as garbled nonsense and moans, and he lets out a low groan, his thrusts becoming even harder and deeper, his silver chain brushing against my chin with each thrust.
His hand tightens even more, completely cutting off my airflow, and my head instantly starts to become light, the pleasure increasing endlessly with each second. ‘More,’ I barely manage to breathe out, and he lets out a gentle chuckle, doing as I say, fucking me so hard that the bed creaks with each thrust. ‘My dirty little girl. Can’t even handle what I’m already giving you, and you’re asking for more. You forget how strong I am. I’m gonna tear you in half as this rate, angel,’ he murmurs against my ear, hand still tight at my throat, silver rings digging into my skin, and I don’t even feel fear, like I probably should. All I can feel is pure, hot need.
He moves one of my legs from around his waist, bringing it up between us so that my ankle rests on his shoulder, the new position allowing him to go deeper, so much deeper, and his tip scrapes against the spot inside me that makes me scream. He reaches down to rub at my clit, bringing me closer to my climax, and I can feel my vision beginning to go blank when he ducks his head to suck at my neck with his plump lips. The mixed sensations of his hand at my throat, his cock filling me up perfectly, his thumb at my clit and his mouth sucking marks onto my skin makes my eyes flutter shut, the pleasure overwhelming me.
‘Look at me, angel. Wanna see those pretty eyes while I fuck you,’ he growls, cock dragging against my walls, and it takes all my energy to open my eyes. His jaw is clenched, sweat dripping down his face, lips swollen, eyes dark and dilated, glinting red every few seconds, his chain dangling in my face. He looks like sin incarnate. ‘Fuck, you’re so pretty. So fucking pretty,’ he groans, releasing my throat from his tight grip, and I take a deep gasping breath, not even realising how much I needed to breathe. He holds his wrist to his mouth, biting at it again and pushing it against my mouth. I lick up the small drops of blood, quickly regaining my strength, and he presses his lips to mine once I’m done, in a brief passionate and sloppy kiss.
He breaks away from me with a grin, continuing to fuck me hard and deep, swollen tip scraping against the spongy spot inside me, and I let out desperate moans and whimpers of his name, Hyunjin grunting and groaning sinfully softly as tears stream down my face, blurring my vision. I clench around him sporadically, knowing my high is nearing, and he knows it too, his hand slipping down to my clit and rubbing slow circles with his thumb, making me call out his name. ‘Gonna cum for me, doll?’ he asks, and I can’t even bring myself to reply, just nodding along with loud moan, and he grins, his cock still hammering into me.
‘Want you to cum for me, angel. Cum on my cock, y/n, soak it up like a good little girl. So good for me, angel, wanna feel you cum around me,’ he prompts, pushing me closer and closer, the knot in stomach becoming tighter and tighter, and I’m so close, practically there, hanging on the precipice of my high. He grins at me, his lethal fangs sliding out and his eyes glowing red before he ducks his head, biting into the soft flesh of my neck and pushing me over the edge. I scream out his name as he gulps down my blood, numbing bliss flowing through me like morphine, his cock still rocking into me and his thumb toying with my clit. My vision is completely blank, neither white nor black, just… blank, pleasure exploding within me, and I feel my consciousness slipping away until Hyunjin’s finger slips between my lips. He must have bitten it because I taste his blood on my tongue, bringing me back to this moment with him.
He breaks away from my neck when I’ve come down from my high, lips and chin covered in my blood and his eyes still flickering red as he grins, both hands digging into the mattress on either side of my head, the pace of his thrusts increasing once more, his cock slamming into me as he chases his high. I wrap my legs around his waist tightly, arms around his shoulders and nails digging into his skin, hard enough to leave marks. I try not to let the overstimulation stop me from getting him to his climax, my pussy clenching around him with sensitivity, and when I feel his cock twitching inside me, desperate moans falling from his lips and face scrunching up with desperate desire, I know he’s about to cum. I dig my heels into his back to hold him deep inside me, and his head drops down to my neck.
‘Cum in me, Jin. Wanna feel you cum in me, please. Fill me up, Jin. Cum for me, baby,’ I murmur into his ear and he does as I ask, moaning my name loudly against my neck as his entire body tenses up. He bites into me again as he releases inside me, his hot thick cum painting my insides as he slowly moves his hips against me, leisurely sucking my blood. He gently rocks into me until he’s finished and I’m completely out of breath, both of us covered in blood, sweat, tears and cum.
‘God, you’re so good for me, angel,’ he murmurs gently after pulling away from my neck, his fangs retracting before he presses kisses to the skin he’s just bitten, sucking and nipping to leave marks. I play with his hair, body still tensing with aftershocks, and he runs his hands up and down my body, caressing my sweaty skin. Every movement, every action, every featherlight touch of his is so comforting, so tender, that I feel like I can stay here with him forever, letting him worship my body so gently like this, my hands playing with his soft, fluffy locks.
But after a while, I can feel myself drifting away, and I know I can’t sleep like this – covered in various… liquids, with completely soiled sheets and a vampire practically drunk on my blood lying on top of me. ‘Jin… I gotta get up. Clean myself up before I sleep,’ I murmur, and he whines, making me smile at his bratty behaviour. ‘No, wanna stay like this,’ he mumbles against my breast, having ventured down to leave marks on the soft flesh beside my nipple. ‘We can after. Just let me have a quick shower and change the sheets,’ I say softly, and he sighs, waiting a few moments before he pulls out of me and gets up off me, standing up beside the bed.
‘Wait here a second,’ he says before heading towards the bathroom, giving me a view of his cute little ass as he goes. I lie there in silence for a couple minutes, focused on the feeling of his thick cum trickling out of me, before he reappears with a smile, making my heart stop momentarily. His hair is pasted to his forehead with sweat, the bottom half of his face is covered in blood, his lips are swollen and his eyes are lidded with the drunken tiredness of being full on blood, but he looks like the most beautiful man in the world to me.
He scoops me up into his arms, bridal style, and carries me into the bathroom, my eyes on his face the entire time, a small smile on his lips because he knows I’m watching him and admiring him. When we walk into the bathroom, my eyes flit to the bathtub, which is now full. I realise he’s drawn me a bath, my heart swelling when he gently puts me down, not letting go until my feet are firmly on the floor. ‘Go to the toilet first. Don’t want you getting a UTI,’ he says, and I let out a bratty whine, making him raise an eyebrow. ‘Toilet. Now,’ he says, and I pout, stomping to the toilet. His eyes stay locked with mine as I piss, and I let out a laugh after a few seconds – the fact that he’s stood there naked and covered in blood watching me as I wee naked and covered in blood is just so funny to my sleep deprived and jet-lagged mind – and he just rolls his eyes with an amused smile.
Once I’m done washing my hands, I practically bound to the bath eagerly, and he helps me to climb in. I sigh happily as sit in the tub, the temperature of the water perfect to cool down my burning hot skin. I lean back against the edge, my eyelids drooping with tiredness as I watch him wash his face in the sink, cleaning away all the blood. ‘What a waste,’ he murmurs as he watches the red-tinted water wash down the sinkhole, making me let out a little laugh, and he smiles softly at the sound. He climbs into the shower and I watch as he turns the dial, the glass fogging up as the water rains down over him, soaking his honey skin and his pitch black hair.
I love watching Hyunjin do anything, my eyes not leaving his face as he gently scrubs at his skin with my passionfruit-scented shower gel, but I’m so tired that, without even realising it, I fall asleep after a few minutes. Hyunjin wakes me with a tender smile, once he’s out of the shower, wearing fresh underwear and joggers, his chest bare and a towel around his neck to gather the water that drips from his dark hair. I’m too tired to even speak as he washes me, soft hands rubbing gently at my skin, cleaning away the sweat on my body, the blood stains around where he bit me, the dried release around my thighs and the echoes of tear tracks on my face. Neither of us speak the entire time, but we don’t really have to – his touches on my body say everything he wants to say, and my gaze locked onto his face says anything I want to say.
He drains the bath, drying me carefully and carrying me back into the bedroom once he’s done, redressing me in a clean pair of underwear and a soft t-shirt of his that I’ve claimed as my own. He must have changed the sheets whilst I was asleep in the bath, and we climb into my bed together, his arms holding me close. I almost fall asleep the instant my head lands on the pillow, eyes fluttering shut as my body lines up with Hyunjin’s, his front pressed to my back and his arms around my waist. I stay awake just long enough to hear him whisper something, something that sounds suspiciously like what I’ve wanted to hear from him for nearly as long as I’ve known him, but sleep takes me before I can reply.
When I wake in the morning, the other side of the bed is empty, and his bedroom is empty too. And when I see that his shoes are gone from beside the door, I realise he must have left whilst I was asleep. I practically turn the apartment upside down, but he hasn’t left me a note. I check my phone, but he hasn’t texted or called. I can barely make it back into bed before I dissolve into tears, sobbing as though my heart would break.
#stray kids#stray kids fanfic#stray kids fanfiction#stray kids au#stray kids imagine#stray kids imagines#skz#skz angst#skz au#skz imagine#skz imagines#stray kids smut#skz smut#hwang hyunjin#stray kids hwang hyunjin#skz hwang hyunjin#hyunjin#stray kids hyunjin#skz hyunjin#hwang hyunjin au#hyunjin au#hyunjin fanfic#hwang hyunjin fanfic#skz fanfic#skz fanfiction#skz fluff#hwang hyunjin smut#hyunjin smut#hwang hyunjin imagine#hyunjin imagine
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Castor - character bio
I’ve been struggling with getting a bio out for Cas for waaaaay too long now, but i feel pretty ok with how it looks currently - i'm going to repost it on my art blog with some drawings of Cas and Hjalle in the future (hopefully). If you want to skip most of the nonsense and just get a feel for her personality, the section under the bio paragraphs is FULL OF POINTS.
links to drawn refs here and here
Longpost under the cut
✦ Early life in Hjalle:
Being born into the noble family Aran, Castor’s early life consisted mostly of being pampered by the attendants and strict education. Cas was a rowdy kid, and with time, lack of affection and validation from her family served to amplify the trait - she went from occasionally disobedient to full-on antagonistic towards her parents, and the nobility as a whole. She began to sneak out; spending her time outside of the Fort, spying on the guards and trying to bribe knights into taking her on as a page.
When Cas turned nine a sibling came into the picture, and she made it her duty to assure Aster’s upbringing would be better than hers. She poured everything she had into Aster, but soon developed a brash and overbearing streak, unyielding in her focus to teach the meek little sister to stand her ground. Aster became torn between Cas and the parents, who in all fairness, treated her much better than their firstborn. This would remain the case until Castor’s dragon-induced injuries.
In her late teens, Cas was seldom seen in the fort - to everyone's great relief. Her mood was always sour, she gave up on her studies and only seemed to care about Aster and joining the hunting parties. Her parents reached their limit when Castor announced she would not become one of the renowned judges of House Aran - this led to an explosive argument, which concluded with Castor storming out. For the following two years, she lived and worked with rangers tasked with protecting and providing for the town.
It was in those years that Cas acquired her battle prowess and scars, the most prominent being a gift from an especially large and angry dragon. A single swipe of its tail tore Castor’s chest and forearm open, forcing the hunting party to rush her to the fort in (what the hunters expected to be) a futile attempt to get her family to provide medical help for their dying kin. The reception was cold indeed, and if it weren’t for Aster’s hysterics and outrage over her family’s indifference, Cas would have not survived the grievous wounds. The upside to this event was a new high tale to impress people with, and strengthening the bond between two sisters. The downside - Castor was now under her parent’s thumb. They made her accept the position of inquisitor; to make up for the hassle she caused them. Taking up the mantle turned Castor’s world upside down - not only would she have to work in close proximity to her father, but her dreams of being knighted were shattered, as inquisitorial duties stand in stark opposition to virtues of knighthood. As Inquisitor she was tasked with investigating and interrogating for the court - the latter, as Aran tradition had it, was extraordinarily bloody.
✦ Vesuvia:
Almost as soon as she arrived, the city sparked something in Cas. This was unexpected to say the least; she was certain the years of gruesome work as inquisitor numbed her to simple joys of life. The sights and sounds of Vesuvia however, made her eager to explore and see how everything ticked - and the more she saw the more she wished to remain in the city. After attending the Masquerade and becoming acquainted with Asra, Cas was prepared to do anything to stay - even if it meant sucking up to the Buffoon count and begging for a job. Lucio proved to be anything but opposed - he’d heard of the “bloody good shows” (pun intended) Castor was infamous for, and was eager to take her off her parents hands. This led to working parallel to the count and his court, but also enabled Cas to dabble in magic under Asra’s tutelage.
This slight betterment of Cas’ situation would not last long however, as The Red Plague took complete hold of the city mere months after she took up her residence in Vesuvia. After perishing, and being brought back by Asra, she very slowly regains certain memories and traits - her sister, love of astronomy, sword skills. She sneaks out, snoops, and is a handful overall; but Asra is happy to see Castor’s “new” self free of bitterness and pain.
After this point, the “game events” take place. I like to imagine Castor braving an amalgam of Nadia and Portia routes, with a fistful (or multiple) of courtier drama. Castor is tasked with an investigation, slowly but surely unravelling how deep the corruption runs in Vesuvia, and how much of it can be attributed to the courtiers. The conclusion of her story focuses on first facing off against the court, then the Justice Arcana.
✦ Physical appearance
Light olive skin, she picks up a slight tan in Vesuvia.
Dark gray eyes, striking marbling on the iris.
Long girl - 176 cm tall, loves being the “tall friend” (and manhandling people close to her). Being taller than her is taken as an indirect challenge.
She has a rectangular body type, could be described as a “runner’s body”.
Prominent scarring across right forearm and torso, missing right breast.
Tastefully disheveled. Her hair has a constantly windswept quality, and the gray streaks seem to be especially unruly.
Inherited the “Aran silver” (early graying), she tries to ignore it. “The more you hide it, the more it shows”.
Secretly really bothered by the many similarities to her father. Avoids looking at herself too much, and whenever she does it feels like he’s looking back at her, judging.
Only ever smoothes herself over before important court meetings and social events. She doesn't know how makeup works, so before any party she asks Asra to sort her out. Cas looking prim is both a treat and a source of friendly jabs.
✦ Character traits
Power walking by default. This can be somewhat intimidating, and she won’t stop if someone is in her way - just put them to the side and continue.
Puts up a really convincing pretence of formality and refinement.
In actuality she finds this facade tiresome, and just wants to talk fast about battle/hunting feats or astronomy. Maybe show off her pyromancy.
Loves socializing, it recharges her batteries.
Dilligent worker.
Tends to overwork herself and neglect her relationships.
Often scatter minded and wanting to do too many things at one time.
Doesn’t appreciate people instigating physical contact or getting up in her face. She needs to prepare herself for it, or be the initiator.
Stubborn as a mule. Never knows when to stop pressing people.
Extremely callous at times.
Annoyingly overbearing
Most of this springs from a place of fear - things had a habit of getting worse whenever her family imposed decisions onto her. In her mind, if she’s the one holding the reins, everything will be better. And if something does fail - she will be the only one to blame.
Starting arguments comes much too easily to her, but she’s just as quick to introspect, and seek out the person she argued with to apologize and approach the issue in an appropriate manner.
Forgives easily
Eternally scoffing at astrology. She knows shes being bigoted, but at this point its almost like an inside joke between her and Asra. “Astrology? It's baby stuff. PSEUDOSCIENCE!” (she cries as she worries over her afternoon tarot reading and preparing pretty horoscopes for the Shop...)
A huge hypocrite at times. “Do as I say, not as I do” could easily be her motto.
Both the upright and reversed Knight of Swords card sums her character up perfectly.
✦ Occupation & Residency
Vesuvia:
Beginning of her story follows the game canon almost to a T - Cas lives with Asra in the Shop, and works there. It bores her to death, and she plays tricks on every customer just to entertain herself.
After being officially hired by Nadia as the Palace Magician, Castor moves out of the shop and purchases a modest house in Goldgrave, much below the value of what Nadia offered her, and what she could afford. It’s convenient and that’s what matters to Cas. She continues supplying the shop diligently, and takes over whenever Asra runs off.
Nadia insisted on Castor having an office in the palace. It grew on her with time, and after The Devil is dealt with it becomes her little “hub”.
Hjalle:
Cas lived with her family in the castle site until 17 years old.
After denying her parents their plans for her future as a judge, she hunkered down in a hunting lodge outside of the town, and spent almost two years living that way - she still thinks of these two years as the most joyous time in her life.
The only thing she ever used her family’s wealth for was commissioning the construction of an extravagant observatory. Reminiscent of a gothic fortress, the stark exterior is contrasted with insides filled with artwork and art-nouveau ornaments. The central chamber is a vast library with a powerful telescope in its apse - it is a sight that could take the breath of the most haughty of nobles.
There’s a tiny living space below the main chamber, furnished sparingly, but with a lovely fireplace (in Hjalle, its a necessity). It’s where Cas stays after becoming the inquisitor/whenever she visits after the in-game events.
✦ Trivia
Cas is 23 years old when she first arrives to Vesuvia - 28 at the time of The Devil’s downfall.
She freed Merlin from a merchant’s cage in the Red Market, during one of her outings in the three year interlude after her death - Asra fumes after they find out she snuck out to the market - yet is amazed that Cas found a familiar.
Cas regained her first memories via touching objects linked to her past life - a letter from Aster, articles of clothing, a sword...
This self re-discovering takes a turn for the worse when Cas finally finds a large, ornate knife - the one she inherited after becoming inquisitor. The memories it resurfaces are a staggering blow to Castor, completely derailing the beliefs she had about her own person. She thought of herself as a paragon, and remembering the torture she inflicted upon others, the lives taken in the name of “justice” made her relapse into bitterness and disenchantment. She deals with those feelings as her investigation into the courtiers progresses.
Predominantly uses pyromancy, other types of magic are strictly used for her work at the palace, and rather sparingly.
Could be best described as a battlemage - enjoys being in melee range and assaulting her quarry with both sword and fire; the latter being used more as a way to distract or stagger the enemy than actually harm. There's no fun in just burning them up!
Doesn’t cook for herself, although she has a natural knack for it - will only cook for guests and short people.
Her dislike of Lucio clashes with gratitude for employing her when she first arrived to Vesuvia - he was the knife which cut Cas off from her parents, and it’s something she could never forget.
Demiromatic/sexual.
She was offered to be knighted by Nadia after defeating The Devil. Cas declined - It’s much more than a title to her, and accepting seemed like mockery (considering her past as inquisitor).
Short fuse, she learns to better control herself while working in the palace. But if someone really pushes her the nearby candles miiiight get a bit out of control. Or she’ll just throttle them.
Hates her full name - Castor is such a mouthful. Sounds stuck up too...
#mc cas#castor aran#apprentice castor#oc bio#longpost#im pretty sure this is just incomprehensible#also text formatting on tumblr SUCKS i never knew until now#ive beed rewriting this for SO LONG NOW and im TIRED#so ill just leave it here#and if i ever feel like i can do better#oblivion is but a click away#begone#post#i cant write so PLEASE forgive me for the sins contained in this
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Chloe DeVito for Myshuno Rules Season 2 @plumbobtv
Chloe DeVito/27/Politician Career: Community Organizer
Education: Distinguished Degree in Economics from Foxbury
Best Friend: Dasan Soto
Traits: Art Lover, Snob, Outgoing, Responsible, Natural Speaker, Role Model, Career-Minded Good Manners, Argumentative
Hiii~ My name’s Chloe and I am the future of the Arts Quarter. The queen of bold colors and clashing patterns. Take a picture now, or you’ll miss me~ I’m 27 and I’ve been in San Myshuno for the last 4 years. It’s been a wild ride. I’d always wanted to be some sort of artist, I wanted to paint, act, sing, dance, something! But my parents… they were your typical “over my dead body”, “get a real job”, “stop trying to be a starving artist, it’s not cute” type. I respect them and their opinions because I know how much they want me to succeed in life, so I followed their advice and instead of going to the University of Britechester for a Degree in Art History (unfortunately, I am not especially talented in any of the arts), I settled for a Distinguished Degree in Economics at Foxbury. Honestly, mathematics and science come easy to me so it wasn’t all that bad, but it was mind-numbingly boring. I always found myself going to art shows, and dance recitals. However, I wouldn’t take back my decision to go to Foxbury, it was there that I met my little nugget. As a senior, I volunteered to be a Big Sister to one of the Freshman at my uni, and found my best friend, basically my son, Dasan. We’ve been inseparable ever since, and it was actually due to him that I acquired my dream job. You see I spent the first few years out of college at a desk job crunching numbers to fatten the pockets of some CEO I’d never meet. Dasan, reached out to me and connected me to a job in the Arts Quarter. I would be using my Economics Degree to help the community draw out its earning potential. The Arts Quarter was on a financial decline, interest in the Arts was at an all time high, but desire to spend money on creative events had stalled. I was hired to at first aid in redistributing the budget to promote longevity, but over the years I’ve moved up in the ranks to be the Community Organizer, organizing and hosting fundraising events to increase our revenue and strengthen the Arts Community in the City.
As you can probably tell, my job is my passion. But my life? Even more colorful~ Currently? …I’m single? Soooo, I just got out of a long-term relationship. Do you know… Wisdom Joseph? Who am I kidding, of course you know him! Hall of Fame Professional Baseball Player, 3-year MVP of the Plummets? Yeah, him. Well, he was my boyfriend, really I should say partner. We met back when I was in college and I attended a game of his and waited around to get his autograph. He’s so old (37) so when I hit him up on Simstagram, he actually wrote back. We surprisingly hit it off really well, and I thought we were a golden pair. He supported me when I left my office job in Magnolia Promenade for the City, and 3 years ago we found out that we were expecting. I gave birth to my darling baby boy Ramsey and I thought that we would get married and officially become a family. But two years passed and when I asked him when he was going to propose, can you believe what he said? *mocking* “You know, I think we should call this off. I was looking for a more unconventional girl, you know a bit more interesting and exciting. We’re over.” 🙄 Can you believe the audacity of this… well anyways. Yeah, no. He really tried to walk out on me and our son, he wanted to go off and find some other screaming fan to date. Well this “conventional” girl was ready to show him my unconventional side. I took him to court, not to sue him, not for child support, not for custody. The complete opposite! I should have won the Starlight Accolades for my performance in that Court Room, I scrounged up my Charisma and Research and Debate skills and convinced the Judge that Wisdom was in a much better financial and mental state to have full custody of our son. I just wasn’t in the best position to give our son what he deserved and of course Wisdom wouldn’t want to deprive his own son of the best, right? And bada-bing-bada-boom, Wisdom has our son. I know some people might think I’m crazy for that, but I don’t care. Wisdom would have abandoned us without a second thought, and I won’t give him that satisfaction. I love my son, so I know I’ll visit him all the time and smother him with love, but that…Wisdom isn’t that smart or humane. So here we are, it sucks to suck.
In the meantime, I’m ready to get back out there and live my life. I want my youth back; I’ve already chopped my locs for a new start. I’m so young and I’ve already wasted too much time on a trash bag. I’m ready to meet some people and live it up in San My. Hugs and kisses babe~
“Life’s a movie, and I’m the main character~”
Private DL if chosen
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Manburg’s final battle.
(Look, it’s been forever since I’ve written something, so I hope this is okay. I just couldn’t get this idea out of my head).
The fire was raging all around him as Tommy scanned the battlefield. People were screaming, crying, begging for help. Another block of TNT went off in the distance, startling Tommy. All there was to do is look for survivors, help the wounded.
Trying to avoid the worst of the flames, Tommy made his way to the podium where he had last seen Tubbo, ascending the steps to join Jschlatt for his speech when Wilbur launched his attack. Tommy sucked in a sharp breath when he saw Tubbo laying there unconscious, Jschlatt and Fundy trying to lift a wooden beam off his body. Tommy quickly rushed in to help and with some effort, they quickly were able to free Tubbo from his position. Tommy felt tears welling in his eyes when he saw how bad Tubbo looked, and quickly crouched down next to his body, next to Fundy examining his vitals. “Will he live?” Jschlatt mumbled, awkwardly standing to the side. Fundy looked up to Jschlatt, before facing Tommy “He’ll live”, he smiled through his tears. “Two of his ribs are broken and his leg is shattered, but-“.
Fundy got interrupted when Jschlatt let out a yelp of pain, clutching at the arrow that appeared in his leg.
“Nowhere to run now, old friend”. Tommy quickly spun around and saw the former president standing there, having already unsheathed his sword. Fundy called for Tommy to help get Tubbo out of the way of the fight as Wilbur charged, and Tommy quickly obliged to help get his injured friend to safety.
Jschlatt was just in time to raise his sword to avoid the killing blow aimed for his head. Tommy watched in dread as the two men, who had once been lovers, locked themselves into one last dance; the dance of death. They matched each other stride for stride, each one blocking and aiming to make the last blow. Both were formidable fighters, but Wilbur was just a little bit faster. Another cut at Jschlatt’s thigh, and the man fell to his knees. “It’s over”, Wilbur sighed, looking almost sorrowful when he raised his sword to end Jschlatt’s rule. The now formed crowd started screaming for mercy, only a few encouraging Wilbur to make the blow. Then, once voice in particular drowned out the crowd. “Dad, please don’t..”, Fundy cried next to a slowly awakening Tubbo. Wilbur trembled, meeting Fundy’s eyes. One moment of hesitation was enough for Jschlatt to reach for his knife and plunge it in Wilbur’s chest. Fundy screamed as his father’s hand trembled, dropped the sword, and slowly sank to his knees. Jschlatt gave the man’s chest a final shove, causing the man to drop fully to the ground, before catching Fundy as he tried to reach for his father. Tommy left Tubbo in the care of the gathered crowd and found himself running to his former leader, friend, brother. “Tommy”, the man whispered, when Tommy raised Wilbur’s head on his knees. “Help me! Bandages, anything!”, Tommy choked out to the crowd, as the older man’s blood soaked through his clothes. No one rushed to him. Tommy stared in disbelief at the crowd, standing there shuffling awkwardly and looking scared. Nihachu took a step forward, then clearly thought better of it. Tubbo, propped up by Badboyhalo and Quackity, was softly crying. Fundy was fighting to get out of Jschlat’s grip, sobbing uncontrollably. But Tommy was alone. Wilbur must’ve realised no help was coming, for he chuckled softly. “Tommy”, he whispered “it’s fine”, before giving a final shudder. Tommy watched as his former leader, friend, brother, went limp into his arms, the light fading from his eyes.Three months had passed after Tommy had been dragged from Wilbur’s body, and being thrown in a cell. For what seemed like days, no one came for him but to give him his rations. The cell wasn’t uncomfortable, but Tommy paranoia grew nonetheless, and for a moment he was scared he was slipping into insanity, terrified he’d end up just like Wilbur. Then, whether it was after a few hours, days or weeks of Tommy being in that cell, he really couldn’t be sure anymore, Tubbo came to his cell. Tommy’s best friend gave him the news that Jschlatt’s leg wound wouldn’t recover and he wouldn’t be able to walk again, forcing him into an early retirement. He passed the presidential seat to Quackity, who to Tommy’s delight had selected Tubbo as his secondhand command. Tubbo couldn’t hide his cheer when he told Tommy he had been pardoned, and that he was welcomed back in Manburg.
Everything was getting back to normal, it had seemed. People worked together rebuilding the townsquare Tommy was gladly part of. It reminded him of building L’manburg with his friends. It was HBomb’s idea to build a marketsquare, as it’d strengthen their relationship with the Dream SMP, and Technoblade promised he’d gladly come down from his cabin in the woods monthly to sell his soon famous baked potatoes. Nihachu found the she’d needed in the arms of Eret, and would learn to smile again, eventually even forgetting Wilbur and his betrayal.
Tommy felt like he was an outcast. People still looked at him wary, and he worried that might never change, even though Eret tried to convince him otherwise. Tommy would often visit Wilbur’s grave, where at least he’d be gone from eyes watching him. From time to time, he’d meet Fundy there, which he’d not be ready to forgive soon for reaching out too late. At the end of the day, Tommy would mostly avoid people but the true friends he could trust. Knowing that he had sided with someone marked a villain in the end, people weren’t most likely to forgive him soon.
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Why Forrest Gump is the movie we need
I wanted to step away from the more serious posts I’ve made recently to talk about a movie that I love. Sadly, it took several years for me to appreciate this film for what it is. As a child, I remember hearing my grandmother say it was a “stupid” movie. I carried this with me until early adulthood, when I began developing my own opinion about things. While I’m disappointed that it took me so long to see the film, it doesn’t take away from the impact it left on me.
I found that I had a lot to say about a movie that’s flirting with 26. Tom Hanks is...well, he’s just downright incredible. I am going to do my best to segment this post in a way that isn't overwhelming.
Tom Hanks: Let’s start with the obvious. His performance in this movie is something to be remembered. His 1995 Oscar win for his work in Forrest Gump confirms this. He nails everything, from the body language, down to the overall language of Forrest. At times, I forgot I was watching Tom Hanks. He made Forrest real for me. I recognize this section might look short to some, but he offers such a performance that you would need to see it play out on screen.
Jenny: A lot of people don’t like her character. She’s hard to digest, I get it. But then, consider all that we see her go through. She suffers horrific sexual abuse at the hands of her father, thus destroying any sense of trust she can ever hope to build with another human being. This person, in theory, should have been the one person that was made to protect her. Instead, he scars her for life. She copes by falling in and out of toxic relationships. She abuses drugs (they try to use this alongside the idea that it was the 60′s/70′s, and it’s what everyone was doing, but I disagree). When we experience her drug use, although maybe a bit more subtle, it’s used as a tool to numb, to free. Eventually, she gets her shit together. Carrying a part of Forrest propels her to a healthier and more fulfilling life, though it’s short. Jenny, in my mind, is the saddest part about this story.
Jenny and Forrest, together: A lot of people hate the idea. Again, I get it. You can make the argument that Jenny treats Forrest poorly. She is what I call a semi-colon in his life for a while. There isn’t any finality in her presence for most of the movie. She’s there one minute, then gone the next to continue another part of her journey. Forrest loves her unconditionally, despite her leaving him when she feels too pulled in. We see the push-and-pull of their relationship at various points; Forrest declaring his love for her in an authentic but simple way. It requires no show or elaborate moment, because it’s simple: He loves her. It’s very likely she loves him throughout the film, but she’s doing what she thinks is best by staying away from him. She sees herself as a black hole, waiting to suck in whoever comes near her. She doesn’t want that to happen to him.
Understanding the complexities of childhood sexual abuse and the impact it has on forming meaningful relationships isn’t for the faint of heart, but it’s worth exploring when looking at this film. Jenny is a damaged soul. Forrest is a pure soul, one that has a lasting impact on those he comes across. I don’t believe in the idea of anyone needing to “fix” anyone in a relationship; that’s unhealthy. Instead, I think Forrest offers her the balance love - true love - she has missed for most of her life. Up until their final few scenes together, Jenny’s motto has been to run when things get scary. In Forrest, she finally finds someone she doesn’t have to run from.
Forrest himself: We are introduced to Forrest when he’s a child. He has trouble walking. He’s a little slow. As much as I hate using that term, I think it’s OK here. Still, he’s inquisitive. He possesses an eagerness to understand those around him. His childlike naivety in the earlier parts of the film is charming.
He has given an undesirable set of circumstances in the beginning. Everyone around him acknowledges this as fact except Forrest. He doesn’t view his seeming lack of intelligence as a burden. Instead, he maintains a sense of positivity through it all. He uses his talent of speed to enroll in college. He seems to be up for the adventure of the Army following college; and yet, there isn’t a sense that he is without direction. The opportunity presented itself and he took it because...why not?
It’s here that he meets Bubba, someone that he finds brotherhood in. They are not the same. They come from completely different walks of life. Still, they relate on a level that’s difficult to achieve for characters that are literally written to end up together (as friends or something more).
Following his completion of basic training, we see he and Jenny cross paths. We are led to believe this is their first time meeting after graduating high school and college. This particular scene is great for both characters. Forrest “rescues” Jenny from the stage - men harassing her - and she establishes clear boundaries. It is, perhaps, the first and only time we see Jenny establish these boundaries in the entire film. There is a comfort with them that she is able to do this, even if it’s not in favor of Forrest during this particular time.
Perhaps one of the best lines in the film: “Forrest, you don’t know what love is.” This line sets the tone for the rest of the movie. Whether Forrest does so intentionally is unclear, but it’s done with such a subtlety that I did not initially catch it as a younger watcher.
Forrest and...everyone else: Going back to, “You don’t know what love is.” Let’s look at the events following this line, shall we?
Forrest saves his brothers during the raid in Vietnam, even after suffering injury himself. Ultimately, he’s looking to save Bubba, but we can’t talk about this scene without acknowledging that he saves everyone in his platoon that he can. He risks life and limb without a second thought
Lt. Dan treated Forrest poorly, for a lot of reasons. Like Jenny, he was damaged, but in a different way. His ego and “stolen destiny” prevent him from forming a heartwarming bond with Forrest, but Forrest doesn’t seem to let this stop him from helping him when he can. The bond of brotherhood from combat motivates him. Let us not forget that Forrest is just a decent human being, and Lt. Dan is in a position where he needs friendship. Forrest recognizes this at some level and offers his friendship throughout the film. One of my favorite scenes is when one of Lt. Dan’s friends (the two women from the bar) calls Forrest stupid. Lt. Dan immediately steps in and defends him. Later in the film, Forrest offers him a job on the boat he bought. Why? Because he promised him he would
Forrest’s relationship with his mother isn’t shown enough, in my opinion. At the beginning of the movie, we see her defend him. She does things for him that many might judge, but ultimately, she wants him to have the best life possible. It’s what mothers do! Eventually, she succumbs to old age. It’s unclear how old she is when she dies, but he cares for her. He pauses his life to give her a comfortable end to her life. We literally see him jump out of a boat to go be with his mother for her final days. This boils down to a mother-child bond that is difficult to break, but one that I find to be very touching
Back to Bubba. Sweet, dear Bubba. He doesn’t make it to the other side of the war, despite Forrest’s best efforts. His family is left reeling. Bubba’s mother has worked as a servant, much like her mother, and her mother’s mother. After Forrest invests in Apple, he hits it big. In keeping his promise to Bubba, Forrest gives Bubba’s mother and siblings half of his earnings from his fishing business, and money from his investment in Apple. He helps build a new church for Bubba’s family to worship. His attachment to Bubba doesn’t die with him; rather, it’s strengthened after his untimely death
Back to Jenny. As mentioned before, she’s in and out of the film. Her impact on Forrest is noted throughout the film, however. He writes to her almost every day (even though his letters are returned). They go for a long time without seeing each other. Following his return from service, Jenny is in an abusive relationship. Forrest sees her boyfriend hit her. This is perhaps the only “negative” side of Forrest we see throughout the film. Of course, I’m referring to Forrest beating the living daylights out of her boyfriend (whose name I don't care enough to remember). I think most of us would act similarly. (Side note: “Sorry I had a fight in the middle of your Black Panther party,” might be my favorite quote from anything ever.) They separate once more, and Forrest continues on with his life. He offers her a safe space when she visits him. More importantly, toward the end of her life, he offers her the comfort of a loving and fulfilling relationship
Truthfully, I could expand on a number of other reasons why I love this movie so much, but I think I highlighted some of the more profound moments here. Honorable mentions include Gary Sinise’s performance. I am less attached to his character, but I admire the positive steps he took in his life to become a better person. Forrest’s mother has a profound impact on Forrest, but in my opinion, this isn’t expanded on enough.
I’d be curious to hear your opinions on the movie.
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06/14/2020 DAB Transcript
1 Kings 12:20-13:34, Acts 9:26-43, Psalms 132:1-18, Proverbs 17:6
Today is the 14th day of June welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I am Brian it is awesome to be here with you around the Global Campfire as we twist the knob and step into a new week together just being aware that it's out in front of us. And here we are in the middle of a month and what a joy, what a gift it is to be here. I mean, we may have all kinds of things going on in our lives, some of them good, some of them challenging, but…and even if everything is challenging, what gift to be…like when we step back from the circumstance and we step back from the swirl of it all the that kinda wants to suck us into the vortex and right down the tube. When we step back away from all that all…all of that and realize, I'm here, this is a gift, these breathes that I'm taking, these are the breath of life. I'm here because God created and allowed me to be here. What a joy it is to begin this new week with you and work through it together. So, yesterday we started the slide downward in the Old Testament. King Solomon, the wise one, passed away, died after having his heart seduced away from the one true God, and to many of the gods of this wives. He had 700 wives and 300 concubines. That's a lot of ladies with a lot of voices from a lot of places and ultimately, Solomon was seduced. He died. His son Rehoboam became king in his place at his coronation where all the tribes are coming together to ratify his kingship. Things don't go well. 10 of the tribes have decided they will no longer have an allegiance to the house of David, which means that…I mean things are looking like this United people, the Hebrew people have decided they don't want to be united anymore. So, we’re in a brand-new week. We’ll read from the New Living Translation this week. First Kings chapter 12 verse 20 through 13 verse 34.
Prayer:
Father, we thank You for Your word and we thank You for bringing us into this brand-new, shiny, sparkly week. And we mark this time, we honor it. It’s a bit of our custom when we come to the beginning of a new week to just observe the fact that it's…it's out in front of us. We’re here. You have brought us to this point. All of our history has brought us to this point, but the rest of this week is out in front of us. It has yet to be written. The story has yet to be told. It will be told by the choices that we make and we invite Your Holy Spirit to lead us and direct us in the days ahead, and to inform us by Your word, as we engage, as we come around the Global Campfire every day this week and take the next step forward. Come Holy Spirit we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.
Announcements:
dailyaudiobible.com is the website, it's always been, always will be...I guess…I don't know. Who knows where the future leads and where technology leads, but it's been home base for a long time. It’s the one place that we all can get to because we’re all over the world. And, so it’s a place to find out what’s going on, it's a place to find resources for the journey that we are on in the Shop. It’s a place to get connected in the Community section. It’s a place to pray for each other. So, stay tuned. Stay connected in any way that you can.
If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, you can do that at dailyaudiobible.com as well. There is a link on the homepage, and I thank you for your partnership beyond words. That's true, beyond words. I've used all the words that I know in my vocabulary of gratitude that we are…that we even are here able to take the journey together. It's awe-inspiring. So, thank you for your partnership. If you’re using the Daily Audio Bible app, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or, if you prefer, the mailing address is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.
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And that is it for today. I'm Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.
Community Prayer and Praise:
Hey __ in South Carolina this your brother Ben in Columbus Ohio. I heard your testimony today and I just wanted to thank you so much for calling in today, for calling in and leaving your testimony. I haven’t personally lost children but just the message that you shared, that you heard from God, the fact that you’ve heard from God and that was so clearly from God. I needed to hear that today. And there’s just something…something about your voice. I don’t know what it was __ but I just feel connected to you. I feel like you are my sister and…and you also feel so different. I’m a 42-year-old man in Ohio, right? But there’s just something where I feel…I feel my forever family connection with you. And so thankful…so thankful you called in. I’m so thankful I got to hear your voice. God bless you.
That the Lord is faithful He will strengthen and guard you from the evil one. Heavenly Father I pray for brother Ruben in Burma. I pray that You will strengthen him and his family and the workers who are spreading the good news in Burma by the power of Your might oh God. Clothe them in Your armor so that they can stand firm against the schemes of the devil. We know that their struggle is not against flesh and blood but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Father, I pray that she would shelter the Burmese Christians in the shadow of Your wing. When life is hard help them remember that You are with them and that they are never alone. Thank You that You are the good Shepherd. Lead each of these dear ones beside still waters. Restore their souls. Thank You, Lord that You remain faithful. And for the dear lady in Spain who is struggling. Oh Lord, I felt her desperation. She is trembling, she is feeling weak. Yet You remain faithful for You are a good Father. She is in a difficult situation Lord and I sense that her faith is wearing thin. We reach out to You Father and ask You to meet every need. Give her the courage to cast every care on You. Your word promises that You will supply all our needs according to Your riches in glory. So, we stand together in this community and ask You to intervene. Thank You that You are a God that hears the cries of Your children and thank You that the answer is on its way. We leave these dear ones in Your hands. To You be all the praise and honor and glory. In Jesus’ name. Amen. Melody Faith from Canada. Love you family.
Good morning DAB family this is the other Melanie. It’s June 9th and I am calling in with a prayer request. I don’t know why I find it so hard to do this, to ask for prayer for myself, but I am going to add myself to the list of all the people who have called in asking for help with weight loss. And I agree, it does seem insignificant or certainly much smaller than a lot of the other things that people need prayer for. But for me, after having had two breast cancer diagnoses in the last three years, this is…it’s critical that I lose weight. And I had been doing really well __. And I’m a stress eater and it just made everything worse and I really have not coped very well. And added to that is shame because I feel like I should have done better, I should’ve leaned on the Lord and…and prayed and done all the things that I know to do as a Christian. And I know that all these thoughts of shame do not come from God. But it’s a battle, it is such a battle, and this is such a stronghold for me. So, family I just pray that you would lift me up in your prayers for strength. If anybody else out there wants to join with me, please email me my address is [email protected]. I would be so happy to walk this road with someone else who’s feeling the same struggle. I love you guys and thank you so much.
Hey this is Melody from Canada. I was just listening to the June 9th podcast and a couple things. Cherry thank you so much for your prayer about sleep. I really need it. My whole family needs it. Our toddler daughter is waking up a few times in the night and…yeah…I really receive that prayer in faith for…for her to sleep well and us…for my husband and I to sleep well. It’s hard doing a dayshift and a night shift. So, yeah, we’re really trying to problem solve and trust God with that. So, thank you for the prayer. Also, Vincent from Connecticut who was calling to ask for prayer about loneliness. That is…that is so significant. I’m…I’m so grateful for my husband and daughter because I don’t do very well alone. And I just pray God’s blessing on you and that you would…yeah…that you would receive the gift of relationship in God’s timing and God’s way. I was just thinking about what Brian was saying about Psalm 127. And I pray that God will build the home and family that he has for you and that he would be your strength in this time. And for all people who are alone right now, especially during COVID. And it’s hard to socially distance. It’s super hard. Yeah, just extra grace for those who are living on their own. Love you. Bye.
Marla Forgiven by the Savior this is Adrian from Maryland. I am praying for you. I have seen your request on Facebook, I have heard your request on…on Brian’s podcast. I’ve heard your request on China’s podcast. I know you’re suffering now, and I am praying for you, I’m praying for you, I am praying for you. Lord, please take care of Marla. Get her the medication she needs and help her survive this terrible, horrible disease of bipolar disorder. My…I…I know someone who suffers from mental illness and it is a horrible, horrible thing. Please, please just hang in there. The shipment of medication will come. God will take care of you. Please hang in there for…for…just hang on. We all love you and we are praying for you. Many people who are not going to call in, they are also praying for you. Please hang on. We love you.
Hi DAB family this is Marla forgiven by the Savior from Albuquerque and I’m listening to the June 10th podcast and I just heard my prayer request and I’m happy to report that my doctor called me on Monday to let me know the samples had come in. And this was right after I posted on DAB Friends with the same prayer request because I figured it would get you guys faster. And right after I posted it and everyone started praying for me, that’s when I got the phone call. So, I wanted to let you know that…yeah…I have the pills now. And it takes a while for them to kick in, but I am very much looking forward to the day when I wake up feeling like my normal self. If you could pray for me that…excuse me…that my bipolar depression does get lifted sooner rather than later, I would really appreciate it. And hopefully I will call in with a praise report very soon. I love you all more than you know, and God bless.
Hey DAB family, Alicia here from Pennsylvania. I’ve been listening and thinking and praying for a couple of people. Some man who called in about being diagnosed I think with pancreatic cancer last week. I just want to lift him up Lord and a few others. Lord You know their names and You know their…their prayers Lord. DAB family, I don’t usually ask for prayer for myself, but I do feel called to ask for some prayer. I am trying to move out of my comfort zone in a few different ways. One of them in trying to speak to friends of friends who make racist jokes that make me really uncomfortable. Lord, I just pray that You give me the words to say. And we know that if anybody can help them or change their minds that it’s You Lord and You alone. So, please if You want to use me as a vessel as a…as a facilitator for change Lord I am open and receptive to whatever You have to put in front of me Lord. I thank You for all the support that You’ve given me in these endeavors and I just thank You for that. Lord, I want to pray about my relationships in general. And please just help me to be able to find myself in a way that I can be complete with only You Lord and not rely on the people for energy. Lord, You know my issues and You know my prayers, You know my heart. Please just be with me, help me to accept You as Lord, as Him. Please if there’s any DAB…
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Our Next Guest...
A/N: Here’s my contribution to @hoopshoney and @purple-apricots With Love, From Wakanda fic fest! I’m so excited to temporarily break from Fonder’s angsty chains and coming with that present-day Yaa and Wins! I apologize for the tardiness of this fic, as I started my new job this week. I had to dust this off from the depths of my archives due to the time crunch. I was going to do my M’Baku x OC, but my time was limited.
Word Count: 2.4K
Warning(s): Fluff, Black Love
Prompt: “Have I mentioned how much I love you? Only twice in the past hour.”
“Chris, I’m fucking terrified.”,you huffed.
You were in your dressing room getting ready to finally begin your Sheimbloom press junket. The first stop was Jimmy Kimmel Live, one of your favorite talk shows. You’d been delaying the tour for personal reasons. Now, it was here and you were going alone. Winston was in the middle of a project in New York. Plus, it was Valentine’s Day. It sucked knowing that Winston couldn’t make it, however,it was worth knowing that he was being supportive and giving you advice on TV interviews. You’d had many a print interview, but never a TV interview.
“Baby, you’ll do fine. You’re a lawyer: you orate for a living. Plus, you love Jimmy, so this’ll be a breeze.”, Winston reassured via FaceTime.
“Yeah, you’re right...I guess.”
“You’re damn right I’m right. I can’t recall a time I was ever wrong. ”
“Well shit I can.”, you smirked, earning an annoyed huff and eye roll from your fiancé.
“ANYWAYS, are you going to indirectly promote Us?”
“Hasn't it already been promoted enough?”
“Now, what’s that supposed to mean,Yaa Denae?” One of the production assistants walked in at the perfect moment.
“Dr. Abdullah, we’re ready for you.”, the PA said.
“Well, won’t you look at the time! I love you, baby love!”,Yaa said in a hurry.
“I love you, too, Pumpkin. Gimme love.” The two of you did your secret handshake despite the distance and he hung up.
“K.D., you two are just too cute for words.”, your assistant Talia gushed as you handed her your phone.
You walked out of your dressing room along with Talia and your other assistant Jacqui to the backstage area.
When you got backstage, you found a mirror to check yourself out and posed for your OOTD post. Winston picked your outfit: simple black blouse with matching flared pants and a Tuskegee crimson and old gold striped ascot (your choice,of course). He even picked out the leopard pumps. That man had an eye for fashion. Your curly platinum locs were pulled neatly into a ponytail.
“Dr. Abdullah, you’re up in 60 seconds!”, you heard the PA announce. “Thank you!”, you replied. You took this time to recite your affirmation to yourself:
I am enough;I am here for a reason;I am here to slay; I am my ancestors’ wildest dreams!
Finally, you walked into the elevator as you heard the countdown and studio applause before hearing Jimmy’s introduction. “Welcome back! Our next guest is no stranger to shattering glass ceilings. In addition to graduating valedictorian of Yale Law School at the age of 23,yeah, twen-ty three, this past July, she became the youngest and the first Black woman to win the Richard T. Sheimbloom Award for Merit and Excellence in Law--the highest award for any lawyer in the world to receive. Please, help me welcome for the first time, Attorney Khalida Abdullah!”
The audience erupted into cheer, but not before the elevator door slid open to you doing that little Thotiana jig. You waved to the audience and gave them your brightest Miss Tuskegee smile. You strutted your way towards Jimmy and hugged him before sitting down. “Well...”, Jimmy began, “...happy Valentine’s Day and welcome to the show, Attorney Abdullah.” The audience continued their clapping and cheering.
“Thank you so much,Jimmy! Happy V-Day to you! Please call me K.D.. Can I just say that one, this is a dream come true to be on the show and two, I need to carry this audience in my pocket because they really--” they all screamed and you smiled as you glanced towards the audience once more, “--they really helped me overcome my nerves just now and this energy y’all are giving me is every damn thing to me.”
“Well, I’m happy that’s something that helped ease you. So let’s jump right on in: what made you want to become a lawyer?”
“You know, not a lot of people have asked me that question.”
Jimmy’s head bucked back in disbelief, “Really?”
“Yeah, so believe it or not, the OJ trial inspired me to go into law. I was about 5 years old and I see Johnnie Cochran, a Black man, and Marcia Clark, a woman, working the case. I guess I was trying to figure out why weren’t there any Black Women working this case. Even after the case, I didn’t meet a Black female lawyer until I was in college. Sometimes, you gotta be your own role model.” The audience applauded your answer.
“That’s something to really live by. Now fast-forward to this past July: what’s going through your mind before and after hearing your name called for the Sheimbloom?”
“Maaaaan, I was a complete wreck and a tad tipsy from the wine they put on the table. I had my umi and Winston’s hands in vise grips. For clarification, Winston Duke, y’know…”,you looked dead into camera 1, “...THICC DADDY M’Baku? Anyways, everything’s going in slow motion, so my reaction was about 10 seconds slower than what it should’ve been. Now, the Chairman didn’t actually announce my name per se.”
Jimmy and the audience laughed. “So...are you the 2018 Sheimbloom winner or not?”, he joked. “Jimmy, listen! Winston, along with some of his fellow Jabari actors, started barking like they did in the Warrior Falls scene? It wasn’t until Winston let go of my hand and literally took his scarf to bark did I realize I’d won.” The audience cheered as a picture of your raw reaction to winning appeared on the screen behind you. Your red eyes were bugged out, mouth ajar, both hands placed on your chest. That feeling of victory began tingling throughout your body all over again .
“How’s life after winning?”
“To be honest…I don’t really feel that much different. I worked that Monday after the ceremony and up until the middle of August because my partners essentially forced me on leave and sent me to L.A.”
“Why would they do that?” The audience laughed. You did too.
“Honey, I had been working like a madwoman from October up until they put me on leave.”
“Ah-a. So that leads me to the next question: what happened that night?” You smirked.
“Well, after giving my speech, I got whisked upstairs to take pictures with my award.” The screen behind you showed a picture of you holding your award up to your ear like a cell phone with one hand and showing off your rose gold slugs by pulling on your bottom lip with the other. You were squatting down and showing off your red sparkly pump.
“That’s one of the most epic pictures I’ve ever seen. What happened next?” The audience gassed you up with “Ow’s! and whistles..
“Wellllllllllllllll”, your toothy smile should have been the indication that it was about to go down, “I sneak away to the terrace for a breather because God knew I needed it. I’m out there and my Winston texts me asking me where I had gone, right? Long story short, he proposed. Afterwards, socialized for a little bit, and then Wins and I went to our favorite 24-hour diner like nothing even happened that night. So, that’s another reason I was out here in L.A.: he still lives here and we needed time to begin planning the wedding.” The audience went crazy with applause.
“So how’s the planning coming,”
“Uhh...it’s proving to be harder than we initially estimated. We don’t live together—he’s here in LA and I’m in DC. So with that being said, we can’t just meet at a central location at lunch and talk about flowers and what not. He’s big money now with his ever-filling schedule and I’m doing the damn thing too so we can’t just break. We try to reserve a weekend every month to devote our time and energy to planning. The few times we’ve actually come together, progress was def made.”
“One more question before the break: when’s the wedding date?”
You looked at him with your usual “Really, nigga?” face. “C’mon, Jimmy. I can’t just disclose something personal like that. We don’t want our special day to be a media circus. But the only thing I will say is that it’s in 2020.”, you teased.
“We’ll be back after the break.” The audience applauded until the director yelled “Cut!”
—————
“And we’re back! I’m here on this Valentine’s Day with the incomparable Khalida Abdullah, attorney and activist. Now earlier, you mentioned that your fiancé is none other than actor Winston Duke, who’s been on this show before.”, Jimmy explained. The ladies in the audience swooned.
“That’s correct! He’s currently doing press for his upcoming movie Us. Y’all should hit it up next month.”, you responded, trying to conceal the goofy smile forming.
“So one thing I failed to mention before the break was that you two are gracing the cover of Essence Magazine’s Black Love issue.”, Jimmy announced. The audience cheered. He propped the advance copy up that showed you and Winston posed together and serving faces.
“So, if you don’t mind me asking, is it difficult being in a relationship with a man of growing international status?”
“Well, damn. I never even thought about that. Ummmm...no. If anything, our relationship is growing stronger. Life after Black Panther has, in a sense, caused us to strengthen our communication. I believe that our mutual communication is our greatest asset. We literally text each other our daily schedules and we have each other’s events and event reminders in other’s phones. We’re very transparent with one another.”
“So you don’t get jealous with other ladies throwing their panties at Winston?”
You shot Jimmy an unimpressed look. “Why get jealous when he’s in mine all the time?”, you said unphased, shrugging your shoulders, crossing your legs and drinking from your mug. The audience hooted and hollered.
"Welll, here's an Instagram picture of the two of you. Not quite like we just discussed but very cute. Does he get tired of the graduations and celebrations you drag him to? You taking his shine?"
A picture of you two came on the screen. It was the Instagram picture the two of you took at your graduation dinner this past spring. In your beautiful red off-shoulder African dress and doctoral cap and he in his khaki seersucker and unbuttoned white dress shirt, the two of you jokingly did the “prom pose” and he was kissing your neck. Your signature smile and red lip were on full display as you were mid-laugh. The audience awed as they felt the warmth and love you two shared in that moment.
“Nahhh...in his mind, he sees us as equally yoked. Whatever hustle I have, be it a speaking engagement, an award, or anything, he’s cheering me on 125%, and the same goes for me. So with anything in our lives, you’ll see one go all the way for the other. Metaphorically, no one has a bigger head between us.”
“But in the literal sense?”
“Oh, it’s definitely his ass.” Everyone including yourself burst out laughing. “Plus, it doesn’t hurt that we’re good arm candy for each other for events. I mean, look at us!”, you said enthusiastically as you pointed at the picture.
“Well, one more thing before we go: what’s on the agenda for Valentine’s Day?”, Jimmy inquired. You carefully thought about your answer. The thought of being away from your Teddy Bear on Valentine’s Day sucked ass.
“Well, unfortunately, he’s on his way to New York to tend to some business. Buuuut, in a perfect world, I’d be rushing to finish this interview and get ready to go out on a date or stay in, get into our pajamas, and watch Forensic Files all night long.”
“Well, once again, happy Valentine’s Day and congratulations on everything you’ve accomplished. Khalida Abdullah, everybody.”, Jimmy concluded. The audience stood up and cheered as you and Jimmy chatted it up until yhe break.
“Annnnd cut! Great job, Khalida!”, the producer yelled over the PA system.
“Not bad for your first interview.”, Jimmy complimented. You thanked him for the opportunity and were escorted backstage.
Jacqui was the first of your staff to welcome you backstage. “K.D. (you hated formalities with your staff), that was amazing! It’s crazy to think that you were terrified right before this and now look at you: mastered it like it was nothin’!”, she said as she hugged you deeply. You’d thanked her and you started walking back to your dressing room.
“I just wished that Wins could’ve been here, y’know?”, you whispered loud enough so Jacqui could hear. You opened the door and it hit something heavy, the door’s impact sounded as though the victim may have been a person. Your face scrunched in curiosity and your native New Orleans kicked in for this very moment. “Bitch, who the fuck?!”, you yelled. You stepped back to make sure you were going to the right dressing room. Yup, this is my dressing room. You slowly opened opened the door again.
Your confused expression remained on your face as you heard Ed Sheeran’s Perfect playing softly. The lights were dimmed just enough that you could see Winston standing in the middle of the room looking the fuck good as usual. You ran to him, tightly hugging his torso. He took in the sweet scent of your loc oil and perfume and kissed the top of your locs. He could feel your chubby cheeks complimenting your candy apple red smile.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, Pumpkin.”, he whispered.
“You raggedy as fuck. Just want you to know that. I love you though. ”, you clapped back.
“I love you, too, but hoooooow?!”, Winston looked down into your teary light brown eyes. “New York, Winston? Really?”, you answered.
“Denver, Khalida? Really?, he shot back.
Silence. “Touché.”
Your staff recorded the entire exchange. Praise the ancestors for them. You looked over to the counter to see a large bouquet of your rose trifecta and Tropical Skittles, your personal favorite candy. Your favorite snack was sporting a burgundy suit with a tan turtleneck.
“Now, I was in a crunch trying to get here, but I figured you’d appreciate the Tropical Skittles over the originals, even though Skittles are your favorite regardless.”, he explained. You shook your head as you heard his explanation.
“God, I love you, Winston.” He kissed your fivehead before giving your lips the same attention.
“I love you even more, Pumpkin.”
“Have I mentioned how much I love you?”, you asked.
“Only twice in the past hour. ”, he teased. “Now come on—it’s half-past 4 and we need to get ready for the night ahead of us.”
“Welp, there goes that Forensic Files binge-a-thon I bragged about.”
Tag Listiana 🤷🏽♀️
@muse-of-mbaku @kumkaniudaku @eriknutinthispoosy-deactivated2 @whoramilaje @mbakusthrone @mbakuwife @crushed-pink-petals @hoopshoney @purple-apricots @inlovewithmakeupcomicsanimelove @jackburtonsays @randomwordprompts @bartierbakarimobisson @wakandan-flowerz @blackpantherreblogs @babygirlofwakanda @eerythingisshaka @washyourlinens @turn-thy-paige @doublesidedscoobysnacks @supersizemeplz @wakandas-vibranium @dramaqueenamby @oshasimone @destinio1 @sonofnjobu @teheeboo @sarahboseman @iamrheaspeaks @chaneajoyyy @lovelynervouschaos @cay-cah @coonflix @katasstrophey @mareethequeen @jozigrrl @great-neckpectations @jellybean531 @yofavcocoa @storibambino @maya-leche @blackgirloneshots @royallyprincesslilly @texasbama @certifiednatural @abeautifulmindexposed
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Long Distance Relationships
So you want to know more about long distance relationships...
Well, for starters, they’re not easy. They take a lot of work, diligence, time commitments, compromising, and patience. They test you in many ways, and sometimes leave you feeling alone even though you have someone.
Long distance relationships are not for everyone, and they certainly are not something to toy with, because a partners feelings are on the line. Take me and Princess for example: Princess needs that one on one relationship, the closeness, the physical touch, the sexual release of being a submissive for a dom in person. However she is also willing to make a several hour drive to see her partner, no matter the circumstances.
Baby on the other hand, is willing to have a long distance relationship (or in her current situation a long distance queer-platonic relationship), and work with her dom in order to have that bond even though the distance does not always physical meetings.
How do I know a long distance relationship is right for me, then?
Answer me this:
Are you fully prepared to go months, or maybe even a year or more without physically being near your partner?
Can you handle when they are unavailable, that you can’t always talk to them?
Do you have the time, or are you willing to make time even if your day is absolutely overflowing with tasks, to talk to them and love them and encourage them?
Do you have the discipline to save money for gas, plane tickets, and hotel rooms just to see them for a few hours or if you’re lucky a few days?
Can you go long amounts of time and remain loyal to them emotionally, mentally, physically, and sexually?
Are you able to handle not being able to touch them, hold their hand, kiss their lips, play with their hair, and overall do what every other couple does?
I think I can do all those things... So what do I do?
You have a few options depending on your current situation. Maybe you’re talking to a potential dom, and you want to test the waters. Maybe you’re a single sub and you want to be actively searching. Maybe you want to be involved in the community and not worry about it. Regardless, here are a few tips for any circumstance you may be in.
1. I’m single, I like it, I just want to freely express my kinky side.
Wonderful! You know what you want and there’s a simple answer to this:
Munches. Play parties. Teaching opportunities.
Basically, there’s a website called Fetlife that has an “Events” page that shows any and all kinky events in your area. Looking for a rope class? They’ve got the link. Maybe you want to play? There’s the info on Fet. A casual pizza place munch? You bet!
By getting out into your local community, you can build up your knowledge and express yourself freely, without worrying about a commitment.
2. I want to be actively searching for a dom, but like, how??
Have no fear, Baby is here! I’ve used essentially the majority of platforms available to us kinksters to seek out true doms who want to have a great relationship with a sub. You name it, I’ve tried it: Tinder, Fet, Tumblr matchmaking blogs, straight up following doms and trying to court them (sorry GPD lolz).
Here are my tried and true reviews:
Tinder: Listen, you’re literally gonna get like 500+ fuckboys. That’s what Tinder is for. HOWEVER!! I have a hack to weed through them. Simply put a point of outside contact that isn’t your phone number (and a platform where you can block people). I use kik, so I simply put my kik username in my bio. If they’re really looking at each person individually, they’ll contact you. Most of the guys I get are total douchebags, yes, but don’t be afraid of that block button.
But, I did find Daddy through kik. He messaged me by chance when I wasn’t even looking for a dom, and we clicked, and a whole year later here we are still in a healthy cg/l dynamic with each other.
Fetlife: Basically Tinder for guys who want to be called “daddy”. You’re gonna get weirder dudes on here, but you have a bit higher of a chance to find a suitable dom. Princess found the dom she is in a dynamic with through Fet, then Tinder, then Bumble, and now they’re officially a thing.
Tumblr Matchmaking Blogs: STAY FAR AWAY FROM THESE!! The only good thing that comes from these blogs is there’s a bunch of pedophiles in one place to automatically report and block. There might be one or two diamonds in the rough, but trust me it’s not worth it. It’s mostly underage children and creepy old dudes. Just report the blogs and move on.
Tumblr Dom Blogs: These can be good, if you’re able to identify the real ones from the fake ones. A ton of “dominants” run these, and very few are actually in the community with good intentions. I’ve been looking for 3 years and I’ve only found a handful of good blogs ( @mistersbeard / @lovemysub are my favorites because they’re educational and fun). So, I mean, you can talk to doms on Tumblr, sure, but be careful and know how to identify them first.
Most Importantly: DO. NOT. GO. LOOKING. FOR. A. DOM. IF. YOU’RE. A. NEW. SUB.
I cannot stress this enough, and if you’re like me you’ll be like “lolz, literally nothing will happen, I’m a smart cookie, I can handle-” No. Seriously, this spells trouble and it will leave you a hurt little subby in the end. Learn, grow, gain experience in a safe environment, don’t think the BDSM porn is accurate (it’s not), practice consent, use safewords, and above all don’t rush into anything. A d/s relationship takes time and energy, put in a ton of both before even calling anything a relationship.
3. I have someone I’m considering to be my dom, but I don’t know how to approach it.
Something I learned that has saved me a ton of grief, is to use the consideration phase to your advantage. Essentially, don’t commit, but play into the dynamic between the person you’re considering.
Let’s say you need some help drinking more water. Talk to the dom you’re interested in about introducing a rule to better yourself. Discuss every detail of it. How much water? How many times a day? What if you don’t meet the quota? What if you break the rule and have coffee? Etc. Etc. Etc. Establish a couple low level punishments if that’s your thing. Then when you’re both comfortable, add another rule, add some rewards, add some more dynamics.
When you both feel like you want to commit a couple months, or even years, later, go for it.
A consideration phase makes everything less stressful. There’s no full submission yet unless you choose it. It’s all in your control, which it always should be, and you can shut it all down with the snap of a finger if you don’t feel comfortable.
The most important unspoken rules of LDR’s:
1. Make time for one another. Don’t send just a couple quick texts a day, a goodnight video, and call it good. Actually make time, even if you’re walking the dog or making dinner, to share little tidbits and make it feel like you’re together.
2. Send everything! Pictures, videos, emojis, gifs, stickers. Send a letter, and email, video chat, plan a day trip (if the proximity allows). Send them things that remind you of them. Discuss big things, small things, and in-between things. Make each other feel like you’re right there, but also maintain the responsibility you have to maintain.
3. Things can be sexual, or not, it’s your control. Feeling pressured to send some tit pics? Stand your ground and refuse. Feeling frisky and want to play? Discuss it and see if you can both do so/are comfortable.
4. It’s hard. Like, really hard. You love this other being so much and you just want to be near them and give them the world and that’s not always possible. But cherish every little second you get to spend with them, in person or online.
5. Be patient, and appreciate everything you give and receive. What you have is special, and it should be treated as such. It’s not everyday that you build a unique bond with someone.
Finally, a word from Daddy A:
It strengthens the emotional and mental sides greatly, but the lack of contact does suck. Essentially, a sub can be with another dominant to fulfill that, if their main is alright with it, but it goes beyond sexual release, as some may assume when looking at any format of bdsm.
The LG/DD dynamic has a bigger focus on protection and comfort by and large. We wish for our submissives to be perfectly fine with us, and thus, give us their submission. In turn, we provide the support, the nurturing and protection they desire.
Sexuality isn't inherently a part of the dynamic, but once you've become so familiar with someone, it's hard to separate into something more casual. You don't want to be spanked, you want to be spanked by your dominant.
How I see it, the distance definitely makes the bond so much stronger, leading to when you finally meet in person being a grand thing. However, it does not mean it's for everyone. You gotta be ready for the stretches of time, the worry, the anxiety and personal issues. Patience is big and openness is necessary.
On top of that, when you do possibly meet, be ready for it to not be a scene right away. Sometimes it'll just be grabbing lunch, maybe something tame where you aren't always in the head space. But, sometimes that's enough; just that, whatever it is, is what you both need to reassure that it's real and can grow. It won't be a sexual release, but both can breathe easier.
Expectations have to be tempered. Maybe you don't have a private place, maybe someone is nervous.
Even without it being a scene, the two could be huge dorks and walk past each other at a theme park despite dying to be beside the other.
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Summarize the ball and everything after
ben got lit with his selected ladies
everyone was having a grand ole time until the rebels fire nation atTACKED
before that, wyatt and hazel snuck wes into the ball as a special ~surprise~ for layla
they danced and wes snuck them away to talk where they had their fiRST KISS ™ and wesla was born
“because you’re… weirdly funny in a good way, kind, put up with me trailing you around. And you have this smile, like it’s permanently crooked”
*sHOOK* “are you flirting with me, princess?”
“it’s possible. are you going to flirt back?”
“is that a risk you want me to take?”
“try me.”
k i s s
layla and wes were going back into the ball just as king chris was about to give the toast. wes got two drinks for themselves when suddenly hazel yells out “nO”
she saw a servant slip something in prince aran’s drink, but twas too late
he drank the drink
and passed out
as well as many other guests, including selected
panic ensued, chaos broke out, people were shot or injured
bc of hazel, wyatt sprinted after the servant to try and catch him
ben, ofc, went after wyatt
wyatt and the servant end up in a scuffle in a secret passageway and when the servant whips out a knife he sLASHES HIM
wyatt gets a little cheek scar TM
then w knocks the knife out of his hand “haHA U LITTLE HOE”
but the servant hits him to the ground
ben catches up, sees wyatt passed out and a t t a c k s (believing his bro is deceased) (also how he gets his bruises for those who remember in rps)
“we all die u either kill yourself or get killed whATCHA GONNA DO”
manages to knock servant out, wyatt gets up alive and well ™ and they take the guard to a cell
they meet up with the rest of the fam and try to figure out why they were attacked since no one from the royal family was injured
*insert time skip* everyone recovers eventually, etc.
aran returns home to go to the funeral of his mentor/ambassador before returning to the palace
turns out, rebels attacked to try and take out aran
a small faction of illéans are still distrustful of the new alliance with new asia and illéa
very tragic and sad ™ bc of other deaths (for real, it affected everyone in a lot of different, serious ways)
butit did not deter aran
AT ALL
strong soft boi
he remains in the palace indefinitely, further strengthening relationship with ben and the royal family
(also, in the background, hazel and james, childhood best friends till the end, have their own sweet blossoming romance that I never wrote bc I suck and i’m sorry BUT THEYRE SWEET AND CUTE NKJSOWEIJG)
*six and seven year old jazel*
“I want to dance in the rain like the movies”
“I can’t make it rain, but I can dance with you. which one this time?”
“nutcracker, pas de deux.”
“got it.” *he smiles and bows, and they d a n c e*
spoiler alert
they dance together for the rest of their lives
on the following episode of keeping with the schreaves, ben and wyatt have their fight, which I will refer you to here since it’s not that long and gives good context
(in the midst of all this, wyatt and gabriella have supah cute moments (he even dreams of kiSSING HER AGH)
(also aran and zara, omg purest of beans like HOLY COW)
they’re pretty awkward for a bit (ben & wyatt), barely talking
until inspiration strikes ben (some help from selected) and with the help of his trusty not sidekicks/sidekicks (sisters), he puts together a gift for his favorite bro
a gallery of thirty of wyatt’s pictures that he’s taken, which I will show below
(essentially a collection of his candids that ben specifically chose when hazel secretly stole some of his film, and a couple ben or hazel took)
(layla helped set up the gallery)
(twas a room filled with all the pictures blown up to different sizes, hanging or on stands, all with their own spotlight)
(they’re beAUTIFUL PICTURES TAKEN BY WYATT AND FAM OKAY)
wyatt is t o u c h e d and they make up a bit, after ben also apologizes and explains himself ofc
along with some more female guidance *cough* hazel/layla sisterly duo *cough*
they’re finally on the mend
all is well
that is until ben needs to make his final decision…
to be coNTINUED
#((pls enjoy and read tis important))#((also its so long lol I apologize))#((but twas fun to write))#((HEHEHE))#selectionoc
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Cloud 9s
The waves, ever so gently colliding into one another as they collapsed onto the beach, provided the perfect soundtrack to Nicky's breakdown.
Not too loud, not too harsh.
Soft and low like the tears running down her cheeks.
This wasn't Nicky’s first time weeping at the edge of the ocean. In fact, she was well into the double digits at this point and likely to hit triple before she closed out her third decade.
The first time she made the short drive to the shore for the express purpose of crying, she'd felt a little ridiculous. There was nothing wrong with her bedroom but something drew her to the drama of grey skies and sea breezes.
That's one of the perks of living by the water, depressive episodes seem more cinematic.
Today's helping of woe was served up by a call from her mother which, if you read a transcript, should have been totally normal but was, as always, specifically designed to destroy her.
"Darling."
Nicky cringed but replied sweetly. She could only hope to survive by mirroring her mother's tone.
"Darling, I'm so glad to hear from you. Your father and I do worry so much."
The first blow.
What was there to worry about? Her parents had checked in with her twice a week, every week, for years and Nicky had never shared even a passing comment that would indicate she was anything other than perfectly happy.
Now, was she? No, of course not. She was regularly crying by herself at the beach, but her parents didn't know that. Nobody knew that.
Nicky gave the verbal equivalent of a hand wave as a response. Life was all sunshine.
"Are you sure? You don't sound well."
She sounded the same as she had sounded the last time her mother had insisted that she'd sounded unwell. The same as all the times her mother had insisted she’d sounded unwell which was every time they spoke.
Another spoken hand wave. The salty air was in her throat, nothing more.
"I did say when you decided to move up there that the sea air would be bad for your lungs."
Lungs! How had this become about lungs? Last time it was "something something, microscopic sand particles are lacerating your vocal chords".
Nicky couldn't get the image of sliced, white bands out of her dreams for a week.
"You need to see someone or it will get worse. I'll speak to Dr Kline and see if she knows anyone you can go to down there."
Why?! From 16 words spoken over a patchy internet connection, her mother had decided that intervention was necessary.
Nicky’s chest tightened as she made a mental note to avoid clearing her throat for the rest of the call lest it fan the flames in her mother's mind. She kept her voice even in her response but made sure to not attempt firmness as she insisted that she was fine. Resistance only strengthened her mother's resolve.
"Jerry, remind me give Marsha a call tomorrow about Nicky's lungs."
Nicky imagined her father, somewhere off camera, giving a silent thumbs up to his wife.
Marsha Kline was not a doctor of medicine. She was a wonderful woman and a very accomplished professor of art history who had been friends with Nicky’s mother for longer than Nicky had been alive. Dr Kline was also very convinced that western medicine was a death cult and any medication not administered in tea form was bad for you.
"Don't roll your eyes, Nicky. I'm only doing my job as your mother. Someone has to look after you."
Blow 5?
The subtle difference between "out for" and "after" in a sentence like that would go unnoticed by most, but Nicky had been playing this game with her mother for all of time. Her mother used "out for" when referring to all adults except Nicky.
Now, you might think that's totally reasonable. Mother's always look after their children and that doesn't mean the semantic difference is some kind of dig. Except Nicky was the oldest of three children and the only one who her mother felt needed looking after.
"You did roll them, Nicky. I'm not going to argue, but you did. I used to be able to hear it in your voice over the phone but now that we are on Soom I can see it."
Nicky bit her tongue and tried to keep her jaw relaxed.
Where had the call gone wrong this time?
She should have suggested the call to Dr Kline herself. That way her mother wouldn't have been primed to fight about it.
At least this time she let "Soom" slide.
"Anyway, your sister and I had a lovely chat yesterday. The boys are doing great, she and Pat are looking really lean with the marathon coming up. Have you spoken to her?"
Marriage, children, weight. The self-esteem trifecta, all in one beautifully benign sentence. Nicky almost admired the efficiency.
Claire should have been born first. She was third in birth order but seemed to have decided from an early age to reach every available milestone before Nicky could make a meaningful attempt.
"You really should talk to her more. And James. Both of them really worry about you."
At this point, Nicky had accepted that she would be going to the beach as soon as the call was over. Why waste a day or two trying to hold it together when all she would be thinking about is the family meeting she hadn't been invited to where everyone did the sad head tilt as they talked about her.
"James is always saying he's happy to have you if you need somewhere to stay."
Somewhere to stay.
Nicky had a perfectly lovely apartment with her own office, a parking space and a gorgeous view but because she didn't have a mortgage, her family talked about her as if she was homeless.
"It doesn't have to be long term. Just until you're on your feet"
Would this be after her newly signed 2-year lease or would James buy that out for her?
"I'm sure he could afford it."
He probably could.
"You don't have to. I'm just putting it out there so you don't feel stuck and alone."
If Nicky had to pick a title for her autobiography, it would be "Stuck and Alone". Even at work where everyone was different from each other, she felt completely out of place. Like a puzzle piece you jam into the wrong section because it looks like it should work but when you take it in as part of the picture, something's off.
"You said you would think about it last time. I know you, you're stubborn but now is not the time for stubbornness. People are trying to help you."
The hardest part about these calls would always be having to defend her contentment when it seemed like everyone else thought she was drowning. Nicky wasn't sad about the life she had built for herself. She was sad that it seemed too small and pathetic for those she loved.
"Just call your siblings. If you've lost their numbers, I'll send them to you. Jerry, remind me to send Nicky the numbers."
Nicky sometimes distracted herself by imagining her father as a sort of humanoid smart speaker with steely mesh for skin, warm glowing eyes and a permanently erect thumb that shone green when a command had been accepted.
The speaker was called Greymax and it always made Nicky smile.
"What's funny? I know you think I'm a silly old woman so you might as well let your laugh out."
Nicky exaggerated her eye roll and sighed. It broke the tension and they both chuckled a bit but they probably couldn't tell you why. Sadness lingered behind both smiles.
"Anyway, nothing to report on this side since our last chat so I'll let you go. I'm sure you have lots of work to do for your fancy new show."
Nicky performed pleasantries with her cheek between her teeth.
It took her less than twelve minutes to reach her usual spot from the end of the call, a personal best, and less than twenty seconds to achieve full body sobs, another personal best.
The actual crying wasn't particularly intense on this occasion. Hard crying just added physical hurt to the emotional despair.
One time, she had attracted the attention of a couple of youths on what looked like a first date. They were shy and gentle but visibly concerned. Nicky was mortified.
From then on she sat in a partially enclosed opening on the side of a sheer rock face and avoided excessive wailing. Sometimes she'd get a curious bird or a tiny crustacean but, for the most part, human contact had been limited to surprised stares.
The time on her phone told her that she had been out there for twenty minutes. That was more than enough for one day and should tide her over until the following week if everything stayed calm at work.
Nicky imagined herself, in another universe, choosing to jog through her inner anguish. Smartphone strapped to her upper arm, smartwatch keeping track of her movements and bluetooth earphones delivering alternate universe pop into her ears. Was that worth a try?
Imagination Nicky was exactly as good at her job and bad at relationships, she just had a comfortable pair of running shoes. That was totally attainable but Real Nicky had always resisted. Crying sucked but it was cleansing and felt natural. Running felt like someone else's thing that she was putting on to prove a point.
When Nicky got back home, she ordered an inexpensive but well reviewed pair of running shoes. The product description painted a vivid picture of how impossibly soft these shoes were, at a fraction of the price charged by other brands. Confirmed buyers wrote formulaically about never needing another shoe again and buying pairs for friends. Nicky never read any of that though because she chose them exclusively for the price and availability for next day delivery.
The shoes arrived but remained in their box for days. Nicky passed them every time she entered her bedroom, making a mental note to try them on, even if only to check the fit, but quickly forgot.
Her mother's next call came and went without incident. A neighbour had to be hospitalised and their pet's needed a temporary home so the entire call was consumed by intro to the pup and solemn predictions regarding the neighbours fate. The prognosis was pretty good but Nicky's mother was certain big pharma was gunning for him. Dr Kline had been consulted, of course.
Teas had been ordered and special instructions repeated in hushed tones but the call was fine.
Nicky was fine.
Usually, the down time between calls was a safe zone where Nicky could stock up on the mundane joys of life but the shoes had been ordered so the universe needed to make sure they were used.
James sent a picture to the group chat. Two little lines on a white stick. Congratulations all around. Wonderful news!
That evening the phone rang.
"I'm trying to convince your brother to move into a bigger house so there is room for you and the baby but Ryan is acting as if I've gone crazy. Can you believe it?"
Nicky finally got to the beach after an hour and a bit. Turns out the shoes really were baby clouds with laces, but it's hard to run when your chest is heaving.
Next time she would have to drive to the beach, then cry while running.
Fewer witnesses and, again, more cinematic.
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Cat Spray Gif Cheap And Easy Cool Ideas
Tricks to make sure that you will find plenty to occupy himself when he meows while he plays with different boxes and automated boxes.Rhinitis is an instinct and knowing what the cause of feline spraying.Then you have to heal your cat is happy or scared.Provide more litter box is going to be effective.
If your textures are brown, the scratches won't be good to finish with to help keep its paws on the market and they will sparkle and frighten her.Alternatively if you teach them which decreases the chemical serotonin, which has the potential to be random for her.With a little kid who really likes ice cream.To do this, immediately give the impression that the food left out for hours.Don't ask me how to clean cat box designed with steps into a dog.
He cried non stop for 2 minutes and use these simple techniques and common in older cats.Now place the fan near it to call a veterinarian to get rid of mats that form because matted fur holds moisture and skin infections if left untreated.Give the cat an opportunity to multiply and the great stare down for about 30 seconds and want to spray your home smell nice.If your cat will really love your cat that actually gets to the cat urine and urochrome which gives her consent to interact with you in two respects.Severe cases often also require specific types of toys and scratching posts to cat scratching the object out or if there are not always being present when it comes to dealing with women.
Cats are likely to have any medical problems can cause it to make your pet cat spayed/neutered to prevent your pet until the nail grows out and sun themselves.Mostly cats should be turned into a 10 minute session at a younger age, then and fastened on tightly.Therefore, you need to minimize tick habitation, which is designed for dogs.To prevent this from happening, make sure they never did or the stains after it has encountered another cat near your home or are of key importance.That is just collected in just a female-male mating going on.
The most effective thing you want to void on the market from which to choose.Some consider it to jump and pounce on moving things.After the cat is introduced to an animal fitting your pet's total diet for Fluffy.to learn and obtain other's advice it will keep him from getting sour or moldy as it is recommended that you were put on this regard so you just squirt the entire house smell horrible.The dried urine forms crystals and when you take on a freshly painted wall, but the noise they make great pets, many of your bedroom.
Cats on the carpet remnant to pieces, I decided I needed to take the time it will strengthen the bond that enhances your relationship with his toys, which he loves.This should be something very positive to you and your new cat, stocked up on anything that smells like the cat isn't using its litter box, make sure that all valuables are out on the success of your time.Draw some contour lines around the eyes or a textured surface will work.Use praise or treats to show your cat has urinated on a regular basis or to eliminate multiple cat breeds that do not like covering and you both can just have a great deal of information on the list above, this is a neat thing if you move your pet at hand.When the other cat in its own room with you.
Run some lukewarm water until it was cleaned.Many animals sing songs, dance dances, and find other things not to the floor below is linoleum or another acceptable area.Cats can cause the cat is a stray animal to come inspect it.It should be easier and more frequently, and the poor little thing was just watered down.Cats devote a lot of things that could have stressed out my cat?
Therefore, you might do for a number of reasons why cats choose the means of control, the vet on weekly or monthly basis.A gradual introduction can go out and buy a cat frequent urination could be experiencing pain when urinating and defecating in inappropriate locations.As a result, I decided to go through the safety factor.The owner should not be familiar with this behavior for a new cat, so I took Luna, in her crate.Cats have an attitude and aren't very loyal when compared to dogs, cats are like that, but you should present a serious surgical operation, and not a simple training problem you can not stand cat fur on furniture and walls.
Cat Spraying No More Amazon
Purchasing a Litter-Robot is another way to convey territorial and if they are going to keep your pet stop spraying.The cat will compress the wraps with his owner.The most important of all he has territorial instincts as well.In fact, there is a good idea to get a runny nose.A simple method that you're not there, and your family is very important that you can afford.
You can use the above suggestions have been deathly allergic to many things on which it can splinter and cut pieces of furniture are taking your cat when you are ahead of time.This is why any cleaning agent that can affect your cat.One day, to my house than spray everywhere to mark a person may experience some side effects.Cats not only pulling out the left over wetness with clean water for a while when the weather is quite clean and to give evidence of a cat is spraying their pheromones in the mouth that break out.Because there are some things that misbehaving cats can certainly spray also.
You can solve this problem is solved you could try and get a flea and tick control products are specially made for cats, who claw trees and other animals and using that solution to a garden hose for application.In the case far too often for the bedding and carpeting is going to need to do to protect them against infectious disease is also a known symptom of tapeworm.The owner has to do the right amount of Listerine mouthwash in the wild breed, and then apply a new house.This is particularly persistent, keep something nearby the bed that you may need to do if attacked?Cats don't like the covered ones better for everyone.
But instead of washing the windows, walls and curtains.Just buy some Natures Miracle Just For Cats, and kittens are older but a stronger equal mixture can be washed that your cat should take proper care of your friends are cat fountains with spouts shooting water into the wall if you want to coach a little, for your cat out of reach and give you a few of them in the games you play, you will need attention.Provide more litter box in certain cases, they have eaten.We don't really believe there are some of the new place to be washed that your cat in your cat is particularly true if your cat has developed a high probability of fertilization.Of course, their lives are harsh and full in spirit.
There are several easy solutions available for them.Ask a veterinarian for performing this minor surgery so that the addition of a cute cats collar which can turn off housecats.Keep them close enough to rub some Catnip or Catnip oil on a windowsill and is meant to hunt for food, their instinct to scratch.You need to plan this as part of your expensive dining table, or your belongings.Also provide them with a smooth, short coat you will raise a happy, healthy and unhealthy, will suffer the most.
Withhold food 10 minutes but before addressing any treatment, we must first learn how to heal the infection can lead to cat fur, you might get aggravated as you can.Blow a puff of air conditioning, as with another family cat in the bedding of her reach unless you wish to meet!Many cat lovers have waiting for spay/neuter surgery appointments to open.Cat shelves can be harmful to a different type of light that shines through your window and turn it off or suck it in a few tips to make your cat urine smell so add some soap.Surely, screaming appears better than others.
How Do I Stop My Cat Peeing On My Sofa
Also as he continues to scratch, you may want to change undesirable behavior is exhibited and all night without a huge role in feline can actually lighten your carpet or walls is not likely to be aware of and get anti-odor spray.The best way for keep your pet care companies that offer chemical sprays that are causing your cat's head.He would also recommend a little costly but they may have existing behavior problems can easily remove and the inside of the urine.The following guideline may help you choose!Teaching cats that are watered down, soapy, or over scented.
Before you head off to have to be the reason is to redirect your cat's urine smell, age, sex, and health condition, etc.This way they do not actually do anything in cat pet training in ten minutes...sound good?It seems like a stubborn child she refuses to use to ensure she is getting tiring.Tricks to discourage them from developing the spraying habit.After a few of the problems that other people and the whiff can almost guarantee if your cat to use a black light to see them ripped to shreds by an old injury or be due to catnip, most notably Australian and Southeast Asian breeds.
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Whump!Cas/Hurt!Cas fic recs
Hurt!Cas fics are my absolute favorite, (in case you couldn’t tell that from my own writing) so here are some I really enjoyed. I hope you will too! Please, please, please read and heed the warnings/ratings/tags. Some are super dark.
Repent of your Sins by Anonymous
AU from the end of Season 8.When Cas returns to Dean and Sam, human, confused, disoriented and scared, they take him in. What else can they do?But Dean is still harboring some resentments. Sam is still sick and damaged from the trials, and Dean feels that Cas is to blame for much of what's happened to them in the past couple of years - things he's never really made amends for...
This one is really good, but definitely dark. Dean is not his usual kind and forgiving self and Cas is hurting throughout.
It's gettin' dark, too dark to see by Enochian Things (Salr323)
Cas is human and alone in the world; Dean's not handling it. At all. But then again, neither is Castiel.
I tagged this in my bookmarks as ‘homeless Castiel, Angst, lovely’ what else do you need to know??
Kiss the Baker by @ltleflrt
Jo is pregnant and craving something a little bit unusual. When she sends Dean on a mission to find her some chocolate cake donuts with bacon sprinkles, he's sure that he'll fail. Luckily his partner Benny comes to his rescue and introduces him to a quirky little bakery that sells all kinds of weird (and delicious!) baked goods. And they do special orders!
Dean finds excuses to keep going back, and Castiel finds excuses to keep giving him special treats.
I feel like everyone needs to read this fic at least once. It’s amazing from beginning to end. I adored it. It’s fluffy too <3 (@ltleflrt, you were looking for dark fics the other day--maybe you’ll find something you haven’t tried here!)
Blackbird Fly by artsyUnderstudy
Nearly a year after starting the fire that claimed the lives of Ruby Darvelle and Anna Novak, fifteen year old Sam Winchester returns home from his stint in court ordered rehab. Sam and his older brother, Dean, struggle to remake their own complicated relationship and the home they’ve lost in the wake of this tragedy, while a chance meeting brings Anna’s brother, the troubled and secretive Castiel, into their lives. Fighting with his recovery, Sam finds himself drawn to the strong and lively Jess, while Castiel and Dean find comfort in one another. As consequences of their past emerge and threaten to tear apart what they’ve carefully rebuilt, they are all forced to reevaluate who their family really is, and to what lengths they’re willing to go to keep it safe.
Great fic! Plenty of Sam in this one too.
Stitches by Askance
Castiel survived Leviathan--but only barely. Vessel mauled and eyes destroyed, Cas is barely clinging to what's left of his grace when Dean finds him naked and alone on the reservoir's edge; in a panic, Dean brings him home to the cabin where he and Sam have been holed up off the grid. What follows is the slow process of the angel's recovery and the unexpected changes that come with his being blind, and in the three months this takes, their little family slowly begins to patch itself back together in forgiveness, love, and darkness.
This was so much better than Cas being left at the hospital with Meg. I’m glad the boys stick together and help each other.
Dean Is His Mission by LisaEllyn
Castiel is stunned -- absolutely astounded to still be alive. But he needs to focus on healing himself. He needs to get out of the bunker before Dean returns because he has no doubt that the hunter will stay true to his word and not “miss” next time.
He is far from healed when he hears Dean approach the library. “You just aren’t the listening type, are you, Cas?”
This picks up after Dean beats Cas in the bunker after 10.22. Good stuff.
Less Than Angels by ashitanoyuki
Newly human, Castiel moves in with Sam and Dean to the Men of Letters bunker. Unfortunately, his presence attracts the attention of Ezekiel, who develops a dark fascination with him. Hiding behind Sam's face and body, Ezekiel coerces Castiel into a sexual relationship, threatening to kick him out of the bunker if Castiel denies his advances. As Castiel wonders if he himself is to blame for "Sam's" actions, Sam himself is blissfully unaware of the angel inside him. Only when Dean catches wind of what's going on can they come up with a plan to get rid of Ezekiel once and for all.
I enjoyed this one a lot more than I should have. More than once. Poor Cas, man. Poor Sam..
A Hunter's Prey by alpineshoodratt
A blue eyed boy he locked gazes with at a stoplight. His prey sat in the back of a pricey SUV, 4 other boys in the car, rowdy and loud. This kid sat quietly, watching out the window, until he noticed Dean looking. His sapphire eyes met Dean’s emerald ones for all of three seconds, before blushing and looking down.
Yummy
This is another dark!Dean one. Like serial killer dark.
And I Will Walk On Water by tracy_loo_who
This fic is set after season 4 and totals ~122,600 words. It's a story about friendship and love, recovery and trust, free will, and Dean and Castiel's journey through it all. It's also about chocolate and hugs. If you read it, I really hope you enjoy it. ♥
I really love this fic! If you love whump!Cas and early seasons Cas then you will too!! It’s really fabulous. Please give it a try, you won’t regret it.
Hesitation by apokteino
Zachariah orders Castiel to seduce Dean in order to strengthen his allegiance to heaven. Castiel thinks it will be something to endure. Dean just thinks Castiel wants him. Neither one is right.
Oh man, this fic. Apokteino is amazing and this fic is too! Read everything by this author. Bonus: Early season Cas is so well written.
Hautley's Bend by ColdIntheStudio
Castiel Novak is used to change. He's used to being the new kid in school. So when he moves with his family to the small town of Rail Pass, he doesn't expect things to be much different than the last three towns.
But then he meets Dean Winchester, an aggressive fellow student who sees Castiel as the shiny new toy he and his friends get to mess with. Castiel has had his fair share of bullies in the past, but nothing like this. He's never felt this way about a bully, or anyone for that matter, before. Maybe something's wrong with him, that he could feel so attracted to someone who makes his everyday life hell.
But then again, he sees the way Dean looks at him sometimes. And there's a lot more to Dean Winchester than meets the eye.
Wow! Buckle in for 500k words of an excellent HS au. My favorite one. It’s a slow burn enemies to lovers and it’s simply fabulous.
It’s Not Easy Being Dean by strangeandcharm
The Winchesters are given a mission: they have to save Castiel. The trouble is, Castiel isn’t really Castiel any more…
I’m really shocked this fic doesn’t have more kudos, I so enjoyed it! Zachariah is a colossal dick to our favorite angel via his AU creation powers.
Pay Your Dues by Huggle
Castiel knows he has a lot to make up for and now he's human it will be harder than ever.
The Winchesters know it too, and they won't let him forget it.
Dark Winchesters. A shorter option for you kids, but it still hurts so good.
Unforgiven by coldrottingtrees
For the SPN Kink Meme.
Prompt:
"Abaddon, wearing Dean, uses and abuses the hell out of Castiel. (Who probably figures out it's not really Dean...eventually.)"
I’ve reread this one several times because I have issues. It’s really well done and Abaddon manipulates Cas like a pro
Specimen Two Eighty Five by @hazeldomain
Prompt: Cas gets taken prisoner by the MOL or some other people. They lump angels in with all the other supernatural creatures, and believe they’re little better than animals. They keep Cas restrained and burn or tattoo warding on him. They talk about him like he can’t understand them. They strip him, examine him, make him manifest his wings. He can’t escape, and every day brings new mistreatment and misery.
Hazel is amazing and has lots of good fics--definitely a whump master. Her fic It Was On Sale is fabulous as well but it features wincest if that’s not for you. It worked for me because it’s an AU and Sam and Dean aren’t brothers. Plus Cas is a total BAMF.
Paid In Full by Huggle
Dean and Sam get word of a book that might hold the key to stopping the Apocalypse. Desperate times, and all, so they don't hesitate to steal it.
Unfortunately for Cas, its owner holds a grudge and has a rather cruel way of settling scores.
This is a short fic (with a 2nd part!! that I actually like even better) but so satisfying. Huggle is on my list twice because this is one writer who knows how to make things hurt and they have a way with words that just sucks you right in.
Love in a McHopeless Place by @weasleychick32
Throughout his years working at McDonald’s Dean has experienced a great number of awkward, unsanitary, and just plain strange situations, but what exactly is he supposed to do when he finds a homeless man sleeping in the playplace? This isn’t in the employee handbook.
I almost forgot this one! Yikes, that would have been a mistake. A great AU with homeless!Cas. This one’s got fluff too!! So probably a good one to end the list with. It’s well written and highly recommended.
I do have more, but this should keep you kids busy for a while I hope. Enjoy! and please leave comments for the authors if you like something! They really do mean so much. <3 (Authors let me know if you want your tumblr linked to your fic. I’ll add it!)
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Together — Hunger Games!AU w/ Park Woojin Fic
requested by anon!
genre: uh the genres of Hunger Games sort of? happy ending!(?)
Y/F/N = your first name
a really long fic?;;;
Waking up in the morning, you thought ‘Today is going to be a great day. It’s the day of the reaping.’ All you hoped was that your little sister, Yoona, wouldn’t get picked. She only has one entry, what are the chances.
Walking out of your house, you head straight to the woods to meet up with your best friend, Park Jihoon. Knowing your ways in and out of the woods that no one is supposed to be hunting in, you find Jihoon sitting on top of a hill. He’s holding what looks like a loaf of bread with an arrow stuck through it. You show him the cheese Yoona has prepared for you and feast on the meal you both made.
The both of you joke around about the Games and worry about who’d get picked, until Jihoon suggests running away and living in the woods together. You knew of his feelings for you, of course you did, but you couldn’t reciprocate it. Your heart has been snatched by the son of a baker, Park Woojin.
Park Woojin, the boy who saved your life when he found you starving behind the bakery and purposely burns two loaves of bread to give to the 11 year old you. It was love at first sight, but you don’t know if your feelings are reciprocated.
All you knew was that he showed up with a red handprint on his cheek, most likely from his mother.
The both of you don’t acknowledge each other at school the next day, or well, he doesn’t acknowledge you, that’s when you also find a hidden pathway to the woods where your dad and you used to spend time together. Now it becomes a hunting ground for Jihoon and you to hunt food for your families.
“Hey,” Jihoon speaks up, his voice bringing you out of your reverie. “It’s almost time for the reaping, let’s go.” And as you both begin to part directions, he tells you, “Wear something pretty, Y/N.”
--
The whole town is there, watching. The Mayor goes up first to make his speech, giving background as to how the Hunger Games began with the eradication of District 13.
On stage, the last survivor of the previous Games for District 12, Haymitch Abernathy, stands. Possibly drunk? And the bubbly Effie Trinket is the MC of sorts, her job is to pull out a name from both glass balls. One for the girls and one for the boys.
First up? The girls.
Every single person’s hearts out there in the crowd, palpitates furiously. Hoping and praying with all their might to not get chosen. Trinket sticks her hand into the glass ball, grabs onto a piece of paper. Her hand slowly pulls away and she looks at the paper she grabbed. A pause.
And a name is called, “Y/F/N. Y/F/N, please come up to the stage.”
All you could hear was the sound of your heart pounding against your chest wall. However, you were relieved Yoona didn’t get chosen, you wouldn’t be able to stand letting her die in the arena of bloodthirsty beings. Besides, you would’ve volunteered as tribute anyway, the outcome would still be the same.
Standing up on stage and looking out into the crowd, you see your mother. Crying. You see Yoona being held by Jihoon, her thrashing in his arms, crying at him to let go.
Smiling bitterly, you await the announcement of the boy tribute. ‘Who will be joining me in this terrible game the capitol finds enjoyable?’
Trinket sticks her hand into the second ball, lifting her hand out, she call out the name of someone you’ve stopped talking to a while ago. Someone who’d you have to choose later on, between letting him live or die.
“Park Woojin. Park Woojin, please come up to the stage.”
The boy who reminds you of hope. ‘The boy who saved me, who i’m thankful for, who i’m completely smitten with.’ How will you survive, knowing that he’s now your enemy?
--
You meet your head stylist, Lee Daehwi, who asks if you’re afraid of fire. Telling you he wants to set your outfit ON FIRE during your chariot ride to the stadium. Woojin shows up dressed identically. Inside the chariot, the both of you find each other making jokes about extinguishing one another. When it was time for District 12 to move, Daehwi lights both you and Woojin on fire. Fortunately, the plan worked and no one was burned alive.
The crowd loved the fire show and cheers, catching a rose thrown at you and blowing kisses, you found yourself holding hands with Woojin. You’ve noticed this before and it’s what caught your attention to him, but up-close, his snaggletooth made him look even cuter. And as if he knew that was what made your heart all fluttery, he looks into your eyes, smiles his smile and says, “Hey, you looked hot. You should wear flames more often.”
“Park Woojin, are you trying to flirt with me right now?” ‘Y/N, stop. You can’t fall for him even more. Nothing will end in your favor, you’re only going to end in heartbreak.’
“Well yes, no, maybe so? What do you think Miss Y/N?” And he smirks.
Smirking back at him, you tiptoe and lean closer to him, a whole zoo erupts in your stomach and you plant a kiss right at the corner of his lips. ‘Well two can play at that game.’
--
Timeskip to the next day.
Training is set to start today. Woojin once again shows up dressed in the same outfit as you. “Why are you copying me, Park?”
“It’s not my fault they want me to match you, or maybe you suggested that? Do you like me or something?”
‘What is this idiot-’
Training lasts over three days, consisting of the same routine. Learning how to start a fire and make shelters- basic survival skills. The second day, they find out a little girl (about the same age as Yoona) has been following you two. Your own personal shadow. That night, Woojin and you got closer, but it seemed like he still kept his distance. Or was it you that was keeping your distance? You didn’t know what to make of this situation, you wanted to move forward and strengthen the potential bond you can have with him, but you didn’t want to get hurt.
The third day is where you trained with the Gamemakers, with a bow and arrow. Let’s be real, you completely sucked at using it, but as you continued to fiddle around with it, you familiarized yourself with the weapon and skewers the practice dummy through the heart and hits multiple targets around the gym. The Gamemakers didn’t pay attention though, they were too busy with the buffet. Infuriated, you shoot an arrow, smack dab in the middle, and thanks them for their consideration then storms out.
--
Watching Woojin’s interview with Daniel, the host, after yours, you felt confuzzled. What are you supposed to do? Woojin, your long-time crush, literally just confessed his feelings for you on live tv!
You were happy he felt the same as you but you didn’t want to act upon your feelings and the news as you aren’t supposed to. Your relationship with him will not happen as you both are enemies. And there can only be one survivor left of the Hunger Games.
--
The night before the Games, you were restless. You couldn’t sleep so you decided to go up to the roof. Guess who else is there, Woojin. You two watched the festivities happening down on the ground. The celebrations mark the beginning of the Hunger Games.
You two sat shoulder to shoulder, enjoying the peaceful silence surrounding you (besides the festivity happening at the bottom). You can feel his hand inching closer to yours, should you make a move and show him his feelings are reciprocated?
‘Oh, to hell with it.’ Frustrated, you grab his hand and hold onto it for dear life. Looking into his eyes, “Woojin, I have something to tell you. I’ve actually liked you since the day you gave me the bread. At first I thought it was just a thankful feeling, but it wasn’t.” Looking desperately into his eyes, seeking for an answer, his eyes showing warmth and care, love.
“You heard my confession already but i’ll say it again, I’ve liked you since that day I gave you those two loaves of bread, and I hope you want to take this onto the next step. Because honestly I can’t wait.”
“What about the games? Only one of us can survive..”
“I have a plan for that.”
--
The day of the games.
Before having to be separated, you two met up to exchange some words.
“Be careful in there and stay safe, Woojin.”
“You too Y/N, let’s meet at the end.” Nodding your head, you walk off to your respective launch rooms.
Cinna repeats Haymitch’s advice, run and find water. He tells you his money’s on you and wishes you luck. And, with that, you’re launched into the stadium. The Hunger Games have begun.
--
Boom. Sounds of cannons going off almost every fifteen minutes, signaling the death of the players.
Snap! A snapped twig was heard below the tree you were hiding in. Bushes ruffled on the other side.
It was the Career Tributes, they killed a girl who was trying to build a fire to keep warm.
More cannons were being fired,
Killing people and watching people getting killed is never an easy sight to see, especially on an empty stomach too. The whole event is rigged. The capitol implants their own weapons to kill off tributes. 20 cannons have been fired. Four more districts.
Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. You really hoped Woojin survived.
Moving out to the pond, you waited and waited for what seemed like five hours but was only one. Woojin hasn’t shown up yet and you were worried. Your heart dropped to your stomach, you felt dizzy, and you felt numb. ‘What if he didn’t make it? What am I going to do now? We were supposed to survive, together.’ Tears were gathering in your eyes.
The sound of someone’s foot being dragged can be heard in the distance, startling you, you get ready to attack. A tuft of red hair can be seen, Woojin. But you were still cautious and stayed where you were at. “Y/N! Help me out, my leg’s been shot. IT ME WOOJIN.” ‘Why is he so loud wth??’
Full on sobbing, you run towards his direction, helping him walk. Consecutively whispering “We made it Woojin, we did it.”
“Yeah, Y/N. We did, we made it!” And he whispers comforting words to calm you down.
Next was the plan, which was to die together if they both survived ‘till the end since it’s either they both win or lose; everyone was waiting for one to make the first move to kill the other. hAH, like that’ll happen. You took out some red poisonous berries and hand a few to Woojin. He kisses you first and then pops a few berries into his mouth, you doing the same.
“WAIT. WAIT! STOOPP. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the victors of the 74th Hunger Games, Y/F/N and Park Woojin, tributes of district twelve!” And you two spit out the berries.
Smiling a cheeky smile, “Told you we’d win, together.” And he pulls you into a hug and kisses the top of your head.
unedited!
ok tbh with you guys, i’ve never read or watched the hunger games otl ikik im a disgrace omg kdsfnkdals iM SORRY;;;
so, i sincerely apologize if this sucks big time. TT^TT
i hope you like it? ♡
#wanna one#wanna one scenarios#wanna one fanfiction#wanna one imagines#park woojin#park woojin fanfiction#park woojin scenarios#park woojin imagines#pd101#pd101 imagines#pd101 scenarios#pd101 fanfiction#wanna one request#request#hunger games au#this sucks so bad#im sorry#;-; sobs
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Prince Aleksander Ferdinand of Hohenberg and Midshipman Dylan Sharp have been my ultimate otp to end all otps since I first read Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld in the eighth grade.
This could be because they exist in one of the coolest examples of biopunk meets steampunk I’ve ever experienced.
It could be because the one of the pair is a subtextual transman so instrumental to my own gender expression that I named myself after him.
But I think that out of everything, its because the romantic aspect manages to be the center of attention without subtracting quality from the plot.
The reason that I’m so invested in these two more then anything else in the series is because the book isnt about anything else. Scott Westerfeld seems pretty open about the fact that Leviathan is supposed to be a young adult romance with the backdrop of characterature of the great war. But unlike so many romantic stories, especially those geared towards young adults, Scott uses the dual narrative to expand on both of the lead’s experience. The story could have very easily been Alek’s alone, while a major player in the world Dylan’s point of view wasn’t completely necessary if the intention was ever going to be Alek getting his throne in the end.
The same goes the other way, if it were just a story of a transman’s developing gender identity, we wouldn’t have any reason to hear from Alek. Both Alek and Dylan could easily have been shoved into a ‘supporting character’ role, but they weren’t.
Simply put, Dylan and Alek are in a love story where neither of them are love interests. They’re both player characters, people we see inside the heads of. We spend the entirety of the first book getting to know them as individuals before they even meet, we see their interactions in a non-romantic light for the first few chapters, and the romance doesn’t start to bloom until it makes sense based on what we know of the characters.
Dylan doesn’t just think Alek is hot and decide he likes him just because outta all the men on the ship theres just something about the one that happens to be the other main character (*cough* kaider *cough*)
The reason he likes Alek is because they shared a very intimate and emotionally charged scene together that strengthens their friendship and ends with with a physical embrace. Its kinda like that trope where a kid goes to a party and then sits on a patio and talks with a complete stranger about life for an hour and is convinced they’re totally in love by the end of it.
Even if this exact scenario has never happened to you, you can see how someone so young ,and in Alek’s case vulnerable would develop a little bit of a crush
But even then, its just an infatuation at first. Something dumb and stupid that Dylan dismisses as such. It’s not till they share ANOTHER couple of emotionally charged and intimate moments in Behemoth that Dylan starts to take his crush more seriously, and only in Goliath does Dylan stop dismissing his feelings altogether. There is time devoted to Dylan coming to terms with the fact that maybe the crush is a bigger deal then it probably should be, and that he cant make it go away by telling himself that its a bad idea.
The Leviathan Series is kinda a double edged sword to me. It is a love story, but done so well people dont think its a love story. When I talk other fans about it being a love story, they insist that it isnt. Its an adventure story because there’s so much action. Its a drama because the characters struggles don’t revolve around their relationship. It cant be a romance because there’s so much other stuff going on. But those elements dont mean its not a love story, those elements just mean its a competent one.
There’s a reason that the last book closes on the romance coming to a fruition instead of the peace treaty signing. There’s a reason the bonus chapter is a fanservice one shot of them basically going to prom together. There’s a reason Goliath opens with the quote: “To everyone who loves a long secret romance, revealed at last.”
Becoming emperor and ending the war wasn’t Alek’s destiny. Being an emperor at all is probably his ‘bad ending’
People make him incredibly uncomfortable, he cant take even the smallest criticism, sucks at anything to do with being in command, constantly doubts himself, and has a fundamental blind eye to gaging other people’s emotions. As a starting point the series could have easily made him overcome these things with an arc that would make him into an ideal leader, but they didnt go that rout because it wasnt important.
The war was never the real plot of the book, but rather the setting. The lesson we learn by the end is basically that you have to let go of old ambitions sometimes and open yourself up to new ones. The new destiny that Alek made required him to abandon a throne he probably wouldnt have wanted in the long run. Dylan has to leave the Leviathan, but does so gladly because he understands that his destiny is fluid. Both of the main character arcs revolve around letting things go, and their mutual attraction is what pushes them to understand that. The priority of the series has always been the romance.
The fact that we think its not a romance story because the plot and characters manage to stand on their own is rather telling about the level of quality we expect in the genre. I think by calling Leviathan a love story it demands that other love stories take the time and effort Leviathan did to flesh out its world and characters before trying to get us invested in their relationship.
I think that its incredibly pessimistic to say that if a romance story manages to execute other elements well it no longer counts as a romance. As if to say that romance as a narrative theme is so shitty that you need to dum everything else down to properly appreciate it.
So often I see people praising books solely because there’s no romance in them, or because the romance has some new dumb twist that makes it not like other romances. Boy meets girl can be interesting on its own if boy and girl have names you can remember and personalities that you want to cheer for. Just because Leviathan is cool doesnt mean its not romantic.
I’ve made no secret about my issues with the Lunar Chronicles narrative, but at least in the trainwreck of truly ludicrous cause and effect, it puts its characters first and foremost and uses the setting to its greatest advantage. It takes the time to explain why they do the things they do, why they like what they like, and even if the outcomes of their decisions are improbable, they still feel earned because the author makes sure to let you know why the plan would work in her world as opposed to ours.
Saying that The Lunar Chronicles isnt a love story is insulting to the work. You dont read those books for the sci-fi or the plot. The plot’s a joke and the sci-fi is terrible. The world makes absolutely no sense and couldn’t exist anywhere within our reality. Not only is the science impossible, but identical to the foundation of any cyberpunk setting with even the smallest bit of thought put into the way shit works. (one example includes an evil mistress who doesnt give a enough of a shit about her pet hacker to supply regular haircuts, health inspections, or clean water but was kind enough to install artificial gravity in her satellite prison and keep it running even when she herself isnt aboard.) But the rivalries and friendships between the factions are unarguably excellent, and the obvious priority of the author when she was writing these books.
And thats fine because she does it well, and if our mass perception of the quality of romance is any indication, its hard to do romance well. She is celebrated for doing the romance so well.
So why cant romances that manage to do both be celebrated as romances? Why do we have to demean the YA romance genre to praise the YA romance genre?
I meant for this post to be like a paragraph, mod out.
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