#i see him worsening | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

izvkuirl · 1 year

Text

Death tw

#my roommate and friend is terminally ill #his heart is failing him #its functioning at less than 30%#he was given a year to live in september #it is now january #i see him worsening #i see him getting more tired #i hear him coughing after an arrhythmia attack bad enough to warrant his pacemaker kicking in #i sit with him when his legs go numb #im terrified ill wake up one day #and he'll be gone #that ill be 20 feet away and not know #that he'll die alone #theres a slim chance he could get on the transplant list #but his heart needs to worsen first #and the transplant could kill him #i dont know what ill do if/when he dies #i have to call 911 to have him confirmed #and then theyll wheel him out on a stretcher #cover him in cold plastic #his deadname will be written on the death certificate #he deserves so much more than this #tw death

0 notes

aleksanderscult · 3 months

Note

In your post about the Darkling where you listed your opinions of him (first impression, impression now, favorite vs least favorite thing, etc) you said how if you had to choose a least favorite quality it would be his grumpiness (especially in RoW). Since I refuse to touch that cursed duology if it’s okay, may you explain what you mean? I know we get some of the Darkling’s POV but that’s pretty much all I know. Could this entire trait of his be a product of Bardugo’s retconning habit or is it something more?

Aha. I see you're practicing self-care too, dear anon. 😌

Here are some examples:

From his POVs we can see that Aleksander is very pragmatic but also bad-tempered and bitter but that's completely understandable.

He has just been resurrected and:

1) Encountered a Saint that he detests.

2) Found his country to be in the worst state possible. Flanked by enemies and ready to attack.

3) Oh and let's not forget that devastating blight! ☝️

4) His captors have treated him like shit and put him under inhuman conditions.

5) Saw the woman he loved live a life that she doesn't deserve, being a shell of her former self and married to a man that he hates and considers worthless.

6) He's all alone. No Baghra, no Alina, no allies, no soldiers. He has to start from all over and has found himself surrounded by idiots (but even so he feels the need to protect them).

The fact that I find his grumpiness kinda annoying is because I as a person have been surrounded by grumpy people all my life so I can't help but find it unattractive and bothersome.

But then again, Aleksander has a really valid reason for being this way. It's very possible that he took this sarcastic attitude from his mother. After all, they had spent so many years together that Aleksander really adopted most of her traits, unwillingly or not. But I also believe he's that way because he has lived for too long.

He's immortal. He has done everything and seen everything, has seen people being kind and cruel, predictable or unpredictable. His experiences have only made him more bitter but that's also because he hasn't seen any positive changes or results from his constant battle against the persecution or how Ravka and the Grisha have no regard for him or don't notice his efforts at all.

Anyway, he's bitter about many things. In RoW he's that way for the reasons I explained in the beginning but, as a whole, he's resentful for a bunch of reasons that include his immortality and its consequences, the loss of people he loved, his strive to be seen and appreciated and the horrors he has witnessed.

#the darkling #rule of wolves #his attitude in RoW is a whole mood #he came back from the dead only to see everything he worked for going down the drain #and the fact that he also woke up completely powerless shook him and left him uncomfortable #and then! the good gang decided to only worsen his condition by leaving him naked in a too brightly lit room #I'm sure somewhere out there there are principles for the treatment of prisoners but what do I know right?#pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova #anti zoya nazyalensky #grishaverse #shadow and bone #anti nikolai duology #alina starkov #anti mal oretsev

40 notes · View notes

petrichormore · 7 months

Text

I think today’s encounter with Ron could be a hallucination but the only thing that makes me hesitate to agree is Ron’s info on the federation. Info that we as an audience know is probably accurate but that q!Bad would have no actual way of knowing. He can’t hallucinate new information. Also, said information was exactly what he didn’t want to hear. If he was hallucinating a fantasy world where he didn’t accidentally kill/eat Ron, it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to me for his brain to include made-up federation info that actively upsets him. If it was a scary, negative hallucination maybe - it wasn’t though. Buuuut you never know I suppose. Either way I’ll enjoy it.

#idk I see the point with ‘Ron was hitting Bad and bantering and he wouldn’t do that’ but. I’d argue maybe he would #q!Bad physically tortured Ron ONCE with the soul vulture and then flipped to being nice to him almost immediately afterward #and it’s been a while since that flip happened so it’s entirely possible that Bad and Ron have been growing closer for that entire time #its hard to understand Ron’s sudden fine-ness with Bad’s presence because we don’t really see a majority of their interactions on screen #but it’s implied that they’ve spent quite a bit of time together since Bad decided q!Ron was someone he cared about #so Ron’s had a lot of time for the Stockholm syndrome to worsen considerably #in the face of a captor who has become kind #idk I don’t think their current dynamic is thaaaat far fetched #qsmp #qsmp badboyhalo #qsmp ron #also Stockholm syndrome isn’t really an official syndrome it’s validity is shakey at BEST #just a fun fact

78 notes · View notes

danothan · 6 months

Text

thinking abt how essential it is to my characterization of barry allen that he’s insecure abt not being able to keep his scars as a speedster, symbolizing his lack of touch with reality + his relationship with his body and humanity + his inability to live in the present bc his anatomy itself refuses to let the memories linger, how he’s desperate to hold onto the past bc he’s constantly reminded of how fleeting life is, how he’ll slow real time down at superspeed to experience smth for just a little longer, how his body can’t keep score so his mind compensates

and then i draw him with lightning bolt stetchmarks and top surgery scars anyway bc i think they look cool </3

#barry allen #the flash #dc #meta #danbles #the stretchmarks kiiinda still apply bc they can come and go #as i mentioned in that one superhealing analysis that i always bring up speedsters’ scars worsen before they get better #so he’ll see the aftermath of an injury pretty bad but it still won’t last #the way i’d write barry is not the same as how i draw him i think #and honestly it’s pretty neat that there’s a difference #the medium calls for different priorities but it’ll always be barry ❤️

29 notes · View notes

lonereaper · 3 months

Text

Anyone else feeling stagnated as fuck in their current situation yet are terrified of the possibilities of change? Just me? ok....

#ok to rb i guess wharterver #This post is inspired by the pain of seeing my dad depressed and knowing that if i stay in this home that i'll never grow and change #Yet hesitating to since according to him he gets up in the morning because of me.#I want to go to this college because I know that i'll thrive in a different situation #A place where I'll know people my age and where I'll do things that I love #Yet both him and I are hesitant because of different thiings #I'm scared to leave him alone and he's afraid because of the way my mental health worsened the last time I went to college #Things are tough right now but i know i just have to hold out #Do things I'm afraid of doing.

12 notes · View notes

dobythealpaca · 2 years

Text

@mxttellion may the sexiest man win

Image inspired by:

60 notes · View notes

twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 2 months

Note

in some ways (very few…) i do see how its cute ari.. ill really give it to you but. he also does look froggy. its a fact and im glad you at least dont deny it <33 but my issue isn’t necessarily just with gojo - gege has done it to yuuji as well 😔 the only person kept true to their core design is Sukuna because gege is the biggest sukuna fucker of them all

all jokes aside ari - i absolutely love the flowers!! the discourse about whether it means death and finality or rebirth really appeals to me (although im not sure we’ll know anytime soon with how the manga is going..)

i love the colour and the symbolism of the snow and the whole somber more human side of him - straying away from his whole “god” persona. i genuinely LOVE the whole idea of it and i think Gege cooked he just.. could’ve marinated a bit longer s’all

……………………………………….

okay i forgive you 😔😔 i might not understand the hate + i still think he’s genuinely gorgeous and handsome and not just cute + i love gege’s art always and forever but i understand where you’re coming from. i accept you. here is a cookie to commemorate the mending of our bond 🍪

BUT !!!! i’m at least happy that we agree on how good the cover is symbolically….. the cold colours of the background and snow are such a nice contrast to the flowers :’3 and i think it’s so sick and twisted of akutami to make gojo’s skin a blue colour…. as if he’s passed away…… it all just . appeals to me a bunch!!!! you put it so perfectly anon

#i DO think it’s worth mentioning how awful the manga industry is though 😭😭#likeeee i understand. not liking gege’s art. or thinking that it’s worsened. i rlly rlly do #i just wish people would keep in mind that he is a Human Being in an industry that doesn’t care abt his mental or physical health #like it was so heartbreaking to read chapter 252 and seeing how blatantly unfinished some panels were bc they just #don’t. give him enough time #THIS ISNT DIRECTED AT YOU ANON just a thing that’s been bugging me in general 😭#but yeah in conclusion!!! i respect your opinion 🫂 glad to clear things up w u beloved #ask tag ✩

2 notes · View notes

guideaus · 6 months

Text

i think eisen needs to show back up in snf... every stark episode i get mad at eisen again

#personal #seeing how nice his brother was and then eisen worsened stark's sense of self #like. he HAS to apologize at some point lol... i dont think a recontextualized flashback fits #he still hit him for no reason and then made stark run away. stark then berates himself every time calling himself a coward when he #just doesnt wanna be abused #stark's w frieren and fern now so its not the same but whenever eisen's in flashbacks im like 😑#he was the only old hero that was shitty to his adoptive son/student and the narrative doesnt quite acknowledge it #w stark being super forgiving abt it while not even knowing eisen's pov #APOLOGIZE TO HIM 😠😡😡😡

3 notes · View notes

butwhatifidothis · 1 year

Text

Pictured: someone proving someone else completely right

OP: Just because I have my problems regarding Claude’s writing in GW doesn’t mean I dislike him.

Genius: Well, if you REALLY liked Claude, and if you were THAT upset about [extremely poorly set up event], then OBVIOUSLY you should have been equally upset about [event that was set up infinitely better in literally every way]. I am very smart.

#Clyde discourse #Fire Emblem Warriors Three Hopes spoilers #Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes spoilers #you see guys Clyde randomly deciding to sacrifice people to save his own people #after having multiple chapters of him worrying about the death happening on all sides of the battlefield #with the literal only possible explanation for this about face-turn being #''My murderous and racist brother tried to murder me because he's racist which means I'm evil now I guess''#is LITERALLY JUST LIKE Dimitri's behavior immediately after a five-year-long isolation #with nothing and no one around him to help with his rapidly worsening mental state #and towards a man who'd literally just tried to murder Dimitri and his friends. For clout #the context for these two events are equal in writing quality and logical throughlines don't think about it just don't think about it just d #if you like/don't mind one you are LEGALLY OBLIGATED to like/not mind the other because they are obviously the exact same #Clyde defenders be wildin'

24 notes · View notes

neonteeth · 5 months

Text

never love an anchor but it's marilis & kieran

#marilis and morrigan who decided it would be safest to raise kieran away from any and all blight #marilis who respects morrigan's want to raise kieran alone #marilis who still feels guilt and a twinge of sadness over not being there to help raise him. to watch him grow up.#marilis who is simultaneously glad their child didn't grow up seeing his condition worsen #in this essay i will-

3 notes · View notes

fawnarchive · 6 months

Text

i miss wrio

#fawn.txt #ouuu. my mood has been so low recently. i think im holding it together well but i think i need to be alone for a very long time #but i dont... have the time for that actually.. is this neg? do i tag this neg #fawn neg #just in case!#NEED HUGS. FROM HIM. and clorinde actually. both #where my wife and husband at (The Wife Is Wrio)#if youre not a selfship moot and see this close your eyes okay i do not need your image of me worsening #Wildrose ⚜️⛓️#been known to bite ⛓️#because it enters with him i suppose.....#i just think that maybe im not very okay right now. but i will be #i just need a little break one of these days... but i have so much to do wahhh jkhdfjashk #i feel like im neglecting my friends and such but Pretending To Be Chill Is Draining !

5 notes · View notes

xmcu-fietro · 2 years

Text

I wasn’t originally going to include Peter in my dark!Charles fic, but all this talk about Peter as a villain is making me rethink....hmm.

#a Peter Maximoff who goes to the mansion as a last resort after a decade of exclusion and hiding after Magneto’s DOFP speech....#who’s bitter and worn out and is angry that his life got derailed because the man he helped break out of prison #aka his father #outed mutants for all humanity to see #and a Charles who is angry with Erik for other reasons (Cuba/taking Raven/worsening mutant-human relations/etc) seeing Peter and thinking #‘maybe I can redeem myself. I failed with my school and the xmen but I will not fail him this time’#but then they discover the government has a plan against mutants and Charles can stop it but only if he uses his telepathy against #unsuspecting gov workers #using cerebro to control others #and it’s a little morally grey perhaps but he does it out of desperation #but then Charles realizes how much good he can do from afar if he simply ‘influences’ the right people telepathically #and it gets out of control #and Peter starts acting as his guy in the field. stealing gov documents and gaining info #and it turns the tide in mutants favor but at what cost?#okay oops I got carried away again. don’t know if I’ll actually include Peter but perhaps #peter maximoff #quicksilver #Charles xavier #professor x #dark!peter maximoff #dark!charles xavier

42 notes · View notes

shinehyuk · 1 year

Text

sad(upset) and mad

#someone please tell my mom to stop forcing me to be around her 'boyfriend that's not actually her boyfriend'#and his daughter too. sigh #i told her i won't eat pizza he's going to buy because i don't want to. but she forced me to at least eat a half #and i have to go out of my comfort zone and leave my room to eat with them. i'm so tired of him #this is a much deeper issue so i won't go into it but. basically he's terrible and i hate him #if i spilled all the tea here it wouldn't fit in the tags. but god i don't know why my mom puts up with him and his selfish narcissistic-#stuff. i'm not mad enough yet to curse but i'm going to #i lost count of how many panic attacks i went through because of him. so you can see why i don't want to eat with him #i miss my aunt and uncle. they always made sure i wasn't out of my comfort zone when their friends were around #i love them so much #anyways. my headaches worsened now. so i'll just tell her that and hopefully she won't force me to go lol

11 notes · View notes

superconductivebean · 10 months

Text

#560: Hogwarts Inquires - III

That's hit me.

MC was worried Solomon might turn her and Sebastian in to the Headmaster and they'd be expelled.

But what would Solomon's evidence be and why would Black ever care without any caught-on-scene for anything really, especially, when Solomon is easily annoyed by simply everything about his nephew.

Besides, even if he would have somehow convinced Black to look into the matter, who could guarantee him that his supposed wish to come true -- if we assume MC was right about him turning them in and that he wouldn't back down on his word (which I believe to be the actual truth, as Solomon was trying to put down / kill the both of them, MC and Sebastian, rather than to have them expelled or worse, sent to Azkaban; that's… the supposed sense of mercy this man has is absolutely vile).

But. Behind MC were Fig, as her mentor (and he would never let the opportunity of finishing his and Miriam's work slip away), also a person of trust to Black, and Sharp, as someone really worried about MC and who I think to be allied with Fig, therefore in the know to some great extent, and subsequently interested in keeping MC out of trouble, at least, of this particular sort, for Fig's sake.

Howevor, even if the toughest defense imaginable would be breached by sheer stubbornness of this man, even after a tactical retreat to Dinah&Matilda duo, what would be the evidence and why would Solomon be sure, that knowing his temper, whatever it was Sebastian took possession of was worth a legillimens from any investigator or, if Black wouldn't let anyone in, Sharp or Dinah.

You know. People who are entangled with Eleazar's inquiries about goblin activities and are likely in support of whatever party that fights goblins back. They wouldn't ever not to condemn the usage of Unforgivables, howevor, but would they cater to Solomon's vile wishes? Doubtful. They'd rather fight him off than let him do justice himself because killing someone for the sake of THEIR OWN good -- what really the fuck is wrong with you Solomon.

Back to evidence.

The Book could've easily be hidden by a third party.

The Relic, too.

But. If we're to jump forward to the dungeon, where it was already too late to change Sebastian's mind and Solomon came across The Evidence…

He destroyed the only evidence he had on them right away… The destruction of the Book would be the only a matter of Anne getting inside the dungeon and, enraged by the extent of it all and by how far Sebastian was ready to dwell, would have still casted Incendio.

The only solid ground would be the usage of Unforgivables. Which Black secretly or not so secretly do not condemn; he doesn't judge MC when she uses any of them in front of him. Meaning, Solomon's only option would be going straight to the Ministry, as Black would likely approve of that Imperio, but.

Given how reluctant was the Ministry. Given the fact Sebastian hadn't harmed anyone. Solomon doesn't have A N Y grounds to imprison him or convince anyone of Sebastian's danger to anyone. He doesn't have a chance on MC either, or he'd face Fig, who can contact the Minister directly at seemingly any time, and Sharp, likely being a man who might have a few things to say to anyone who're live in a disbelief of any cure existence and although it's not a crime, who're also induce that disbelief on unwilling or dependent others.

#днявочка #днявочка: hlegacy #eng tag #hogwarts inquires - en #i got angy with solomon again im sorry #i might've overlooked something but please allow me to enjoy the thought ofhim being absolutely petty in his attempts to ruin anybody's lif #anybody's life that is not impaled with malaise or curse #he is fucking miserable in his abuse #hashtag saveanne #she was only sorry about his death because two reasons one practical and the other sentimental #1) living without a legal guardian can cause legal troubles #2) abusers often make their abusees fully dependent on them emotionally #she was living under one roof with this man for so long she believed him and she gave up because he just... said so?#i dont believe a single thing this man has to say about her life or her injury / curse #even if there is no cure you cannot tell the uncarable there is no cure why would you want to worsen their life this vile way #and bash out on their ray of sunshine like _that_ and in front of a new person in hogwarts; a home to them #also remember that anne was the most reckless / wicked / unhinged? of the former slytherin trio #solomon could've broke her into this state for the same reason he dislikes sebastian so much. solomon might had never liked his brother #and seeing him in his children... well... how. fucking. PETTY.#i disdain this man so much.#you have NO IDEA.

3 notes · View notes

fuyuesu · 2 years

Text

i have the objectively correct take on middle school daimegurio. probably

#honeyworks #ft4 #full throttle4 #megu #megu ft4 #dai #dai ft4 #rio #rio ft4 #daimegurio #rio complained to his brother ALL the time abt these annoying assholes at school who wouldnt leave him alone #all while packing their lunches for them #everyone knew that they liked each other including themselves it was very obvious #also i like the idea of iv being like. the student council prez or smth who had to reprimand these idiots whenever they got into fights #his headache only worsens when local jock yui gets involved w these idiots #(if i think abt it hard enough i can fit in the idea of ivyui knowing each other prior to yui knowing daimegurio. just watch me)#...man. i wish i could write #i can see the blorbos goin in my brain and i think this could make a good fic but writing is SO hard #melty doodles

23 notes · View notes

obeetlebeetle · 2 years

Text

trying to crack ep3 is SO hard. wuvvy. hob. what is going on in ur little heads

#like the best i can get at for wuvvy is #1) she doesnt smell smoke and thinks of hob as a person who gave rue cause to write their letter / led them on #2) she DOES smell smoke and realizes hob could pull rue away from their role (destabilizing/dismantling her role) so she tries to deter him #3) same as 2 but she is genuinely trying to kill him?#4) she is wounded by rue but sublimates her anger through hob as the cause of their actions towards her #5) she is wounded by rue bc she is suddenly aware that they are capable of seeking something else and she acts on impulse to hold them back #5.5) i have to think shes acting on impulse. wuvvy is calculating but not like this #6) she is wounded bc she is rue's protector and she does not know how to protect them #and 7) hob really pissed her off in that conversation #knick is both harder and easier to understand #my guess is: he wanted to apologize to rue earlier but chose not to out of fear of being scorned by his superiors #and now wuvvy appears to demonstrate the failure of that choice and the apparent worsening of rue's injury #he is guilty but then cannot get wuvvy to provide a path for remediation and hob NEEDS someone else to tell him what to do #how to resolve the guilt #bc if someone gives him the structure by which to act no one can blame him for doing it wrong #instead wuvvy insists on the guilt. perhaps she sees him as a rake perhaps a political enemy perhaps a threat of a more personal nature--#--she thinks he mocks her. she mocks him. it hurts. he chooses the only structure he knows which is satisfaction through violence #but i dont know what provoked them. why either of them react so so strongly and why the scene escalates so quickly #so uh if u have some answer for me.... hmu

13 notes · View notes