#i remember i came out to my friends at the end of year 9
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hi! ive seen you talk about your surana a bunch but i dont know if ive seen her full story. what were some of the pivotal decisions she made? i love hearing you talk about your ocs, theyre always so in depth and thought out!
oh thank you!! :) my surana is my Eldest Daughter from my very first full playthrough of a dragon age game, so i think a lot of people newer to the blog (like... from less than a year and a half ago probably lmao) have less of the context in complete form. so i will attempt to summarise!! it may be... long...
minerva surana is a manipulative, driven elven circle mage, heart-breakingly willing to sacrifice whatever she believes is necessary for her Grand Goals, who is often so busy playing 5d chess she forgets she’s a twenty-one year old with no experience of the world outside the tower
okay it did turn out fucking long the rest is under the cut its like 9 bulky paragraphs enjoy
her family were tevinter liberati, elven slaves who had devoted themselves to buying their way out and very recently succeeded. her parents were desperate to see her and her elder sibling grow up knowing only freedom, and sent their children south with another part of the family while they remained to pay off the last of their debts. the journey was long and difficult, and they had little left when they ended up in the denerim alienage. in a twist of bitter irony, magic that might have made minerva someone of value in the imperium saw her freedom once more revoked in the south. minerva remembers nothing of tevinter, and only a few fragments of what came next: of light through the vhenadahl’s branches glinting on a templar’s blade, of her sibling fighting them and being knocked to the ground, terribly still, with blood in their hair, and of her grandmother saying what she might have said many times on that long journey south: we can survive anything, as long as we never look back. ironically, minerva often took that to heart by denying all memory prior to the circle.
young apprentice minerva was a sullen child, with few friends; karl thekla took an elder brother’s interest, and jowan clung to her talent. she only really flourished when, after her terror of her natural gift for spirit magic saw her self-hatred turn dangerous in her early teens, first enchanter irving took an interest. he was a father figure to her, and he showed her how to channel her power into control, and her distress into ambition. newfound devotion to elemental magic saw her hailed as a prodigy, and surely a future first enchanter with irving’s tutelage. (only irving considered her too headstrong for the role. he never told her, fostering the drive he had cultivated, both fearful for the state she might return to if he didn’t, and curious as to what else she might become.) she grew up arrogant and beautiful and deeply loyal to the circle, learning that it was only the weak and the defiant who would fail to thrive there, and convinced she was neither. many of her peers wanted to be her, and few of them wanted to spend much time in her company. except jowan, still the little brother hiding in her shadow, and halliserre amell, a rebellious rival with a winning smile, who made up for their lack of her discipline and raw power with sheer brilliance, and whose heated arguments eventually developed into... ah, something else heated.
not long before the start of the game, amell told her they were going to accept tranquillity. it didn’t matter how clever they were; with their weak magic, they would die in the harrowing. they’d only been so defiant of the circle before because, having accepted their fate, the risks were nothing to them. furious and unable to admit it was because she was in love, the last thing minerva ever said to them when they were whole was that they were a coward not to try. when jowan told her he feared he too would be made tranquil, minerva was still recovering from the loss, not to mention flushed with even more arrogance than normal from her own successful harrowing. she had been the perfect circle mage all her life, twice as good as everyone else to make up for every rumour about where she was from. surely she had earned one defiance. surely she could save this one thing, her oldest friend. and she is a loyal person, in her way, emotion powering her fierce drive, incapable of abandoning what she has set her heart on. irving, from whom she had learned everything, was ahead of her every step of the way. he arranged for her to be taken in by the grey wardens. she had proved herself as headstrong and unsuitable as he had feared—and she was shocked and bitterly betrayed to finally see that—but he also believed this might bring her to where she would truly belong.
as a grey warden, minerva’s highest concern is perception. when the stakes of the game are revealed, she has enough hubris to see it as a chance to not just save but change the world. defeating the archdemon isn’t enough. she needs to be seen defeating the archdemon, at the forefront, as an elven mage; she has enough idealism to believe it will really matter for her and people like her, and enough shrewd cynicism to consider what she may have to sacrifice to achieve it. mostly she approaches problems with the skill for diplomacy and management that irving taught her, with that good good Master Coercion skill. she gets many of the “better” and certainly more peaceful quest outcomes, not always motivated by altruism, but determined to be remembered well when she leaves each faction behind. her one great sacrifice of this goal to be seen as the perfect mage is when she takes up blood magic, determined after she sees its power that she alone can handle it, to get the job done and keep what’s hers alive fight after fight. but that only makes her more dedicated to her actions elsewhere
the real test and most pivotal moment of her arc is at the landsmeet. she has arranged anora’s marriage to an alistair hardened for the role (once more following irving’s example, learning to teach ambition as he had taught hers. is there love in that, or just selfishness? she doesn’t know). all that matters is that the joint rule neatly fulfils her desire for compromise to please all parties. but then she struggles between two aspects of her goal: she wants to be seen, personally, as the victor; she does not want every noble in ferelden to see her kill the hero of river dane with magic. she knows how that scene will be remembered, in the end. when riordan suggests recruiting him instead, it seems the perfect solution to everything, the salvation of the day. and then she realises she’s broken alistair’s heart, just when he’s breaking hers. she is incapable of backing down in front of them all (it’s only to alistair, her alistair, but she can’t do it—not to a human, and not to someone part of her will always see as a templar—not when everything she wants was so close.) he abandons her for the throne she taught him to want. she goes on with loghain in the party, and eventually—unable to let loghain snatch the final sacrifice from her grasp, and realising she does want to win and live, after it all—convinces him to do the dark ritual.
in terms of her most important relationships with companions: minerva traditionally romances zevran, who is in many ways uniquely her match having learned the same bitter lessons with the crows that she learned from the circle, and who is so dear to her and capable of lightening her heart when no-one else can. i’ve also experimented with the idea of her romancing alistair, to really dramatise the Landsmeet Divorce and capitalise on future political shenanigans where she could one day be his mistress, but more traditionally they are simply an extremely closely trauma-bonded pair of people who are incapable, at least that year, of really understanding each other deep down. it falls into a pattern where she loves someone with all that fierce drive, enough to die for them, but she will always prioritise what she thinks they need over what they are saying and what they want, often with misjudgements and terrible consequences for them both. it was true with amell, it’s true for many others
she has something very intense and homoerotic going on with morrigan, she has a strained relationship with leliana and wynne, and she has respect and comradeship and a fair bit of fundamental disagreement with sten and loghain. the awakening squad are the people she will consider family for life, most notably nathaniel who she started out not liking at all and is now her work wife, her right hand, can finish her sentences, etc.; anders, who remembers her as karl’s annoying teacher’s pet telltale little sister and is still sometimes baffled by who she’s become; velanna, who makes minerva her most genuine self by having regular screaming matches with her as a sign of affection; and oghren who tried to quit drinking at the same time she tried to quit blood magic, leading to many conversations that deeply baffled everyone around them.
the “current” minerva surana is a sharp-tongued leader who was born for the role of warden-commander, who loves her work and that it matters, who has a truer confidence that is less blindly arrogant and more willing to admit to mistakes, who has worked her breathless way up to h*lding h*ands in public with someone she loves, who has finally learned the hard lesson that the world needs more than an heroic example who followed all the rules to truly be bettered... and who, as rebellion brews, has never been one to sit back and watch while others changed the world
#minerva surana#i THINK thats everything major... it must be#minerva enjoyers who im sure remember more of my posts than me tell me if i missed anything crucial writing this in one sitting#shes my babygirl. thats crucial.#i didnt cover the exact details of her quest decisions bc i think abt changing them a lot#def bringing the sides together in nature of the beast. bhelen supporter and she rlly cultivates that alliance she loves orzammar#ive never played it but in retrospect i believe she wouldve killed connor#and. saved the circle. given that the other option is [checks notes] murdering her dad for the crime of [checks notes again] being tortured
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this summer i realised i lose my grip on my whole ass gender if someone she/hers me for too long
#ive identified as enby for just over a year now#i remember i came out to my friends at the end of year 9#anyways last summer i guess i was still coming to terms with it so i guess i wouldnt have felt like this then#but after a whole school year of being they/themd and being called my preferred name#it so shit to have to spend 6 weeks as a she/her😭#enby#non binary#nonbinary#queer#im frothing at the mouth to go back and be a they/them again#BUT THIS IS MY LAST YEAR AT HS AND WHAT IF I CANT BE A THEY/THEM IN SIXTH FORM OR COLLEGE BC THERES NO TRUSTWORTHY PEOPLE AROUND#i guess ill just need to really gay myself out next summer#send a message
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im probably never gonna watch the kenobi series but i did just find out there was a qui-gon scene so i went to find that. it was awesome btw i have a soft spot for qui-gon. but then in the recommended i saw it... vader vs. obi-wan in that series and i watched it and
#I HATE STARWARS#!!!!!#cant even put my feelings on anakin and obi-wan into feelings#do not form bonds with people do not make friends or find people you call family!!!! it will only end in PAIN#anyway. apart from that.#i always had (and still have) a soft spot for qui-gon like#i watched the prequels first (do not get on my back about this i was 9 years old at the tops)#and then i didnt watch the OT for?? years??#need to stress i wrote a star wars themed mystery play i acted out on stage with friends and my teacher like#let us use the school stage. and my whole class and my mom and siblings came to watch#I DID THAT WITHOUT EVER HAVING SEEN THE ORIGINAL TRILOGY 😭😭😭#i was in like 5th grade for the record#i played. yoda. i think my costume was wearing a green shirt backwards so you couldnt see the graphic on the front#and a beige bath towel as the robe#I WISH I STILL HAD THE SCRIPT ITS JUST ROTTING ON MY ANCIENT LAPTOPS HARD DRIVE#and in case you were wondering? i also played a character called ''president narwhal'' i dont remember his deal. he had a paper horn#he also had a bath towel robe#anyway all that to say.#i had not seen the original trilogy so baby me's first character death that made me sad#was qui-gon in the phantom menace </3#i forgot where i was going with this. my tldr of that is that qui-gon was like my fave as a kid for some reason#so seeing him come back even just for a scene made me like YEAHHHHHHHHH
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i just want to stop feeling suicidal so constantly and i want to stop having my paranoia spirals and i want to have peaceful sleeps without night terrors and i want to feel safe in my body and in my own space and i want to eat and i want to not be so overwhelmed by my psychosis and i want to be over everything that kennedy did to me but i also really wish i could contact him again so i could deck him in the fucking face and then i call c and ask her what the fuck why the fuck did she do that and beg beg beg my family to leave the church that is so clearly harming them and dooming them to tragedies.... and so on...
#why did i write about that pregnancy why did i use my abuse for an assignment why did i delve into these memories such a mistake#whenever i remember it happened im like oh my god i could have had a 9 year old maybe i did want to be a mother#maybe i am suffering now bc i was supposed to be doomed to the same narrative like most women in my community#like maybe it was a fluke that i got here bc i don't fit in i hate myself so much i feel like everyone hates me and wants me dead and gone#if i knew any of their numbers still i would ask for ativan again i cannot fucking sleep my anxiety is never ending#i cannot tolerate the weight of the emotions i want to be numb i want to be high i want to be dissociated again#i broke out of my constant dissociation and now im here and i can feel my feet on the ground and i am living pov and it hurts so bad#i want to be in the arms of my best friend i want to be on her floor stroking the fuzzy carpet while we eat penne together#ever since she came back into my life i am so happy i have that anchor again but oh my god it makes me realize how distant i am from everyo#and how little i trust#i also miss my other best friend that i never get to see but i want to hug them tightly and we never have enough time w each other but ever#moment is so vivid and strong and they make me feel so alive and aware of the world we are in and its such a blessing that they decided to#talk to me the day they did and the friendship that came after like idk#i dont have many close friends but oh god the few i have i love th#them so much and they make life worth living but ugh yeah im fighting voices and spirals and theres a lot happening inside#ill be fine i have a lot of feelings my life is nonstop chaotic bc i have 5 bpd/bipolar women in my family and all emotionally absent men a#and our narratives weave together so close so tightly i cannot separate myself but i want to but can i? do i want to?#ezra.txt
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we were never just friends
ellie williams x reader
part two (part one, part three, part four)
summary: modern!ellie, both in their mid twenties. ellie and reader have been friends for years, their friendship has always been somewhat flirty but nothing has ever happened. not yet anyway…
warnings: smut at the end (18+ mdni), reader cheating on her gf with ellie, fingering (r receiving), oral (e receiving), fluff (e+r), angst (r+gf)
author’s note: i was screaming and kicking my feet writing this it was too much hsjxkdndbfx i hope you enjoy ♡
word count: 5k approx
you could hear a banging. your head was smushed into the pillows and you were still half asleep. it took you a minute to come to and realise that the banging was knocking on your bedroom door. you groaned a sleepy “come in.”
ellie pushed the door open with two coffees in hand and came to sit on the end of your bed.
“morning.”
you mumbled a “morning” back as you rubbed your eyes and slowly sat up. you felt the duvet slip down and quickly remembered you went to bed only wearing panties last night.
“fuck,” your eyes widened and your hand slapped down on your chest to hold the covers in place, an embarrassed blush crept onto your cheeks.
“sorry, i didn’t see anything,” ellie laughed, handing you a coffee and chucking you a hoodie that was lying on the floor next to her feet.
“thanks,” you hugged the hot cup after pulling the hoodie on. you felt pretty hungover and dreaded to think what you looked like.
“why are you so chirpy this morning?”
“i’m not as much of a lightweight as you,” ellie smirked. you playfully rolled your eyes at her before checking your phone.
kate 🩵
8:39am
morning babe, how was your night? xx
you
9:02am
really fun thanks, did you wanna look at california plans today? xx
kate🩵
9:03am
aw good. yes, i can come over later xx
you
9:03am
come over whenever xx
you locked your phone and looked up to see ellie looking at you. she quickly averted her gaze to her hands holding the mug and started fidgeting with her silver rings. your eyes darted down to look at them too.
“what’re you doing today?”
“kate’s coming over later, we’re gonna look at booking a beach holiday in california somewhere,” you smiled, excited at the idea of lounging on a warm beach day in, day out.
“oh, nice. first holiday together?”
“yeah, pretty exciting.”
“yeah, very,” ellie half smiled, still playing with her rings. “how is she anyway? i haven’t seen her in ages.”
“she’s good, she works a lot so that’s probably why, but yeah good.”
there was a small pause before you spoke again.
“what about you? you been seeing anyone lately?”
her eyes snapped up to yours, smirking. “no, you’d know if i was.”
“i don’t know, you might have some secret double life i don’t know about.”
“actually yeah, it’s probably about time i told you,” she dramatically took in a breath, “i’ve been in a secret relationship with hayley williams for the past 6 years.”
“oh?”
“we’re actually married. that’s why we have the same last name.”
“i’m offended you didn’t invite me to the wedding.”
“it had to be private for…” she laughed and stammered, “top secret…security reasons?”
“too bad, i wish i was there to object.”
she leaned her body forward a bit. “what? for me?”
“no, for hayley williams you idiot.”
“right, right. makes sense,” her voice trailed off before she finally said, “ok, i better go. the band were really good last night.”
“yeah they were great! hopefully they’ll be there again,” you smiled up at her as she stood up to leave.
˚ · • . ° .
it was later in the day and you were sat on the sofa, feet propped up on the coffee table whilst kate sat next to you with her laptop open, browsing places to stay.
“ooh look at this one,” she said, turning her laptop towards you.
“oh my god it’s so beautiful, but probably too expensive for me.”
“well, we want to go somewhere nice though.”
“i know, of course, but something like this is just a bit too much out of my budget,” you said, feeling a bit embarrassed.
you knew kate made more money that you and was naturally more money orientated. of course, you were ambitious and cared about that sort of thing too, but you were more of a ‘rather be poor and happy than rich and sad’ person. kate on the other hand, was the opposite. you heard her sigh next to you and move her laptop back to keep scrolling.
“what?”
“nothing.”
“tell me,” you pried.
“it’s.. ah, it’s just that when i first brought up going to california you were so excited and now we’re actually looking at booking it, you keep saying no to things.”
you were a bit taken back. you didn’t think you were being negative about anything, you just genuinely couldn’t afford any of the options kate put in front of you. they were amazing but to put it bluntly, expensive as fuck. besides, anytime you put forward a suggestion, she found something wrong with it. it’s too far from town (meaning it was a 15 minute walk instead of 5), the beach looks boring, there’s not enough restaurants. you didn’t want to say anything, but it was starting to piss you off.
“i am excited. it’s just,” you sighed, “i just thought it mattered more that we had fun together, not having the fanciest hotel or whatever.”
“we’ll have fun, but i don’t want to go and stay in some shitty place.”
“i never said we should? we can still find a nice place.”
“then why do you keep saying no?”
“because i don’t have a bottomless pit of money?”
both your tones had shifted to annoyance. your body language had become more rigid and your brows were slightly furrowed.
“ok whatever,” kate sighed again, going back to her laptop, turning the screen as if she didn’t care if you could see it or not.
“no, sorry, why are you being weird with me?”
“i’m not being weird.”
you almost wanted to laugh.
“but, you are? you get mad at me for not having enough money and then just say ‘whatever,’ how does that help anything?”
she shut her laptop and turned to you.
“i don’t know what you want me to say, but maybe you need to start taking better care of your money or something so we can do things like this.”
“sorry, are you my fucking mother or something? i’m fine with money. sure, i have to save and budget and all that but who the fuck doesn’t?”
“i’m not trying to tell you what to do i’m just saying that it’s not a bad idea to think about earning more. it’s good to be ambitious, babe, and i know what you do doesn’t earn very much.”
she tried to put a hand on your knee but you shot up to your feet, starting to feel overwhelmed by how quickly this conversation had gone downhill.
“kate, you are literally telling me what to do. am i supposed to just sack my job in and do something i don’t care about just so that i can have more money?”
she looked up at you, a perplexed expression across her face. “why wouldn’t you want to get a bigger income?”
“it’s not tha–oh my god,” you felt like you needed to pace, adrenaline taking over you. “not everybody needs to be earning the biggest wage they possibly can, ok? don’t get me wrong, money is nice, i get that and i get that it’s very important to you, but i could never sacrifice my happiness for it, that’s just not me. i love what i do and you know that so don’t start trying to make me feel like it’s not good enough for you all of a sudden.”
she was silent for a moment, processing your rant. she looked away from you and you looked at her, trying to catch her eye again, anxiously waiting for her to say something.
“i gotta go.” she started shoving her laptop in her bag and stood up.
“what?”
“i think we need to take a minute before we look at this again, ok?”
you felt stupid. and you hated the fact that this made you feel stupid.
“ok,” you mumbled.
you stood there, dumbfounded. this was supposed to be a fun thing for you both to do together and before you’d even reached step one it had gone wrong. you understood that kate was a person who liked to climb the ladder and earn as much as she could and you were happy if that’s how she wanted to live her life. however, she couldn’t seem to accept the fact that you’re not like that. you enjoyed your job and admittedly, you weren’t anything close to rich but who cares? you enjoyed your life and that’s all that matters.
instead of sitting around feeling crap about yourself you decided to call ellie. it didn’t take long for her to pick up.
“hey.”
“hey.”
“everything alright?”
“yeah yeah, i just, um, what are you doing?”
“you ok? you sound upset.”
“no no, i’m fine els, i just…” you felt silly that you were nearly in tears right now but you couldn’t help it.
“are you at home? want me to come over?”
“only if you’re not busy.”
“i’ll be there in 10,” she practically cut you off.
“oh, ok. see you in a bit. thank you.”
“see you in a bit.” and she hung up.
you let out a shaky breath before deciding to wash your face and freshen up before ellie got to yours, not wanting to end up sobbing in front of her. sure enough, she was at your place in 10 minutes and when you opened the door she gave you a sympathetic look and pulled you in for a hug.
“what wrong?”
“it’s stupid.” your voice was muffled by her shoulder.
“i’m sure it’s not,” she said, pulling away and dragging you to sit down. you both sat facing each other, sideways on the sofa, one leg bent and the other hanging of the edge. she looked at you, waiting for you to speak.
“kate and i got into a fight about money and it just really pissed me off.”
“what did she say?”
“she was saying i need to be better with money and that i should earn more and all this bullshit. we were trying to book a hotel and we just couldn’t agree on anything so she just decided to leave and fuck,” you groaned, “it just wound me up.”
ellie listened intently, pausing before speaking to let you finish.
“what a fucking asshole.”
“ellie!” you slapped her leg lightly, trying not to smile. she laughed.
“what? it’s true. that’s a fucked up thing to say.”
“yeah,” your voice was quiet. she ran a hand through her hair.
“i mean who the fuck cares where you stay, more important to just be together, you know?”
“that’s what i said.”
you looked at her and you were both silent for a moment, the overwhelming cloud you felt before starting to evaporate.
“so, what are you gonna do?”
“i don’t know,” you sighed, “we’ll still do it, it was just a stupid fight but i guess we’ll have to compromise.”
ellie just nodded, puffing out her cheeks slightly.
“i hope i didn’t drag you away from anything.”
“aw no,” she waved her hand in dismissal, “was just at jesse’s.”
“no, ellie, i said don’t bother if you’re busy!”
“it’s fine, honestly. he understands and i didn’t want you to be upset.”
“you’re so sweet.”
“am not.”
“you so are.”
“i’m not sweet.” she hoped you couldn’t see her cheeks flushing pink. you could.
“you’re the sweetest to me.”
“ok, yeah, i mean,” she stumbled over her words, “i can be, but only for you.”
“see?” you grinned, putting your hands either side of her face and squeezing slightly. a breath got caught in her throat at you touching her. you let your hands fall down, landing on her knees.
“so,” you started, “you wanna make me feel better by letting me beat you at mario kart?”
˚ · • . ° .
two hours had passed of you and ellie sat on your floor, backs against the sofa, playing video games. kate hadn’t messaged or called. you hadn’t either, but honestly, you didn’t really know what to say. you were still a bit annoyed and wished she would apologise before you just let it slide. your mood had definitely improved though by having ellie around. you were scrolling through your phone whilst ellie was in the bathroom when a notification popped up from your groupchat with her and dina.
dina
4:47pm
bitchesss guess what
freya’s lakeside cabin is free next weekend and she’s invited you guys and kate to come with us
for free! it’ll just be food etc we need to buy
you
4:48pm
omg YES
tell freya thank you and i love her!!!
i’ll ask kate later
ellie
4:49pm
the perfect slasher movie location
sounds cool i’m in
dina
4:49pm
good! i’ll let you know more soon
ellie then emerged from the bathroom and sat back beside you. you looked at her like a kid in a sweet shop.
“how fucking cool is that!”
“i know, gonna be fun. typical that i’m fifth wheeling though,” she joked.
“oh you won’t be, dina and freya aren’t like that and me and kate are–“ you stopped yourself, “well, let’s see if she even comes.”
˚ · • . ° .
she didn’t. kate was working. which was fine, you thought. it was short notice and things were still awkward between you two. you felt terrible for it but you were kind of glad that it was just going to be the four of you. that way, considering everything recently, you knew it would be fun and stress free.
you could also do with a break from the strain of booking this california trip. in the end, you had booked a place. it was still too expensive for you really but you were getting tired of going back and forth, plus a compromise of some kind needed to be made and you were trying to be positive about it and not fuck it up further. after all, you were still looking forward to going away with your girlfriend for the first time and assumed that this dispute would soon blow over.
you lugged your bags out of the boot of freya’s car and followed everyone up to the front door of the cabin. you were surrounded by a huge lake, a dense forest and fields that spread themselves out for miles. was it the perfect location for a horror? yes it was, but you were going to have the best time here, you could tell.
“this is so fucking cool,” ellie said.
“thanks, it’s my sister’s and her husband’s technically but they let me use it a lot,” freya said.
she was a sweet girl, really kind and easy to get on with. dina had only been dating her for about 3 months but they were really cute together.
“thank you for inviting us,” you said.
“oh no problem, i’m glad you could make it.”
as freya held the door open for you all to walk through, she asked if you wanted her to give you a tour and show you where your rooms would be. thinking it was easiest to do that first you said yes.
the cabin was nothing short of stunning with its wooden beamed ceilings and open fire place. it also had a fire pit outside near the lake which you hoped you’d get to use. after being shown the bedrooms you dumped your stuff in yours. ellie’s was opposite and dina and freya were in the master bedroom a bit further down the hall. you sent kate a quick message to say you’d arrived safely and started unpacking things like your face wash and toothbrush. you didn’t bother unpacking your clothes seeing as you were only here for two nights. you heard talking downstairs so left your room to join them.
“what did you guys wanna do first?” freya asked you all.
“i really want to go swimming in the lake,” dina suggested, “if you guys are up for that.”
“yeah sounds fun.” you looked at ellie.
“yeah sure.”
you went back upstairs to change into a bikini and also grabbed a towel, some shorts and a baggy t-shirt to throw on after. joining the others downstairs, dina and freya already nearly out the door, you couldn’t help but look at ellie. she was wearing loose shorts and a sports bra style bikini top.
“you’ve got a new tattoo,” you said, touching her upper arm softly as you looked at it.
“got it a couple months ago,” she watched your face.
“you’re so secretive.”
she just laughed and shrugged, muttering “come on,” before holding the door open for you.
it was late in the afternoon and the sun was still warm but not too hot, and you still had a couple hours left of daylight.
shrieks met your ears as dina and freya jumped off the edge of the little wooden platform into the water. you put your stuff down on a chair round the fire pit, where they’d put theirs and ran excitedly to the edge.
“you jumping in?” you said, turning to ellie.
“maybe.”
“if you don’t, i’ll push you,” you teased, grabbing her shoulders. she laughed and her hands flew to yours, scrambling to grab them to prevent you from pushing her off the edge.
“don’t you fucking dare.”
“i will.”
“i know you will.” her body twisted trying to grab your wrists, fighting against you pushing. she tried to ignore how your boobs pressed into her. before you knew it, you were falling and crashing into the cool water. you came back up, flapping your arms and rubbing water out of your eyes screaming, “ellie!”
she was still standing on the edge, hand over her mouth, doubling over in laughter.
“i’m sorry!”
“no, you’re not.”
“no, i’m not.”
you could hear dina and freya laughing in the background which made you turn. a huge splash of water suddenly came over your head as ellie jumped in.
“fucking hell, are you trying to drown me?”
“yes.”
“charming.”
you could see dina and freya kissing so you made an ‘oop’ face at ellie and you both laughed. the sun was really bringing out her freckles. she’d always get weird if you ever called her pretty, but it was only the truth. she was pretty, and you’d always thought so.
the four of you swam around leisurely, talking about this and that for a while before deciding to get out. it was starting to get dark so freya turned on the outdoor fairy lights that were draped in a tree near the fire pit.
you all took turns using the downstairs shower and grabbed a couple of beers before sitting around the fire you had started.
“so, anyone got any ghost stories to tell?” dina joked.
˚ · • . ° .
you all talked for what felt like forever, laughing until your stomachs ached. the conversation now had seemed to split off though into you and ellie, whilst dina and freya giggled and blushed, dina’s legs thrown over freya’s lap.
“ok well… we’re gonna go to bed,” dina said, grabbing freya’s hand. you could see them smiling into kisses as they reached the front door.
“oh! young love,” you declared jokingly and ellie laughed.
“you wish kate was here?” she asked.
you paused, thinking.
“things are still a bit awkward between us, is it bad that i’m kind of glad she isn’t?”
you toyed nervously with the hair tie on your wrist. ellie shifted in her seat, mouth moving as if to speak but stopping herself, thinking of something better to say.
“if you’re happy then i don’t think it’s a bad thing.”
you smiled at her. her eyes bore into you and she almost looked nervous, her hands fidgeting with her rings.
“i am happy right now,” you voiced.
“good.”
there was a moment of peaceful silence between you before you suddenly jumped up and grabbed her hand. she looked up at you, waiting.
“look at the stars with me? seeing as we’re here.”
her eyes softened, a doting smile covering her face as you both laid down on the ground, staring up at the dark night sky.
“it’s beautiful,” you whispered.
“it is.”
“we should go.”
“where? to space?”
“no, to starbucks,” you quipped, “yes to space!”
she turned her head to look at you, looking at the sky. she admired the glint in your eye and the way your cheeks looked when you smiled. her voice was hushed and soft.
“i’ll take you.”
you turned your head to look at her.
“how will we get there?”
“i’ll build us a spaceship.”
“oh with your excellent handyman skills?”
“yeah,” she laughed, “with my excellent handyman skills.”
“can it have a mirrorball inside? ooh and a record player and–and a mini bar.”
she laughed at your ridiculous requests for this hypothetical spaceship.
“it can have whatever you want.”
she bit her lip. your smiles faded as you looked at each other, taking in each other’s features under the dim moonlight. maybe that one beer had hit you too hard or maybe it was just the atmosphere of being at a lakeside cabin, but you couldn’t ignore the way your stomach flipped as ellie looked at you.
“well,” your voice accidentally came out a bit shaky, “it sounds almost too good to be true.”
she propped herself up on her forearm, now looking down at you as she laid on her side.
“does it?”
you slowly nodded your head and your eyes must have darted between her eyes and her lips because she leaned in, as if to test what you would do.
you shocked yourself when you lifted your head slightly, causing your noses to graze each other. your lips then ghosted over each other for a moment, both unsure if you should keep going. your brain felt foggy and you couldn’t think about anything else but her.
then, just as you thought you must have blacked out and were dreaming, she pressed a soft kiss to your lips and your body melted into the ground. it was sweet and delicate. her hand came up to hold the side of your face and yours held onto her arm. everything felt right and your earlier statement still held it’s truth, you were so happy but—
“oh my god,” you freaked, gripping her shoulder. not to push her completely away, just enough to stop the kiss.
“what am i doing?” you brought your other hand to your lips, touching them.
“fuck, i’m sorry,” ellie sighed and she moved off of you.
“no, i’m sorry. i’m the one with–“ you quickly sat up, feeling a wave of anxious nausea.
“i’m the one with a girlfriend.”
she sat up next to you, arms resting on her bent knees.
your brain was going a million miles per hour trying to process everything. one, you had just kissed your best friend, two, you had just cheated on your girlfriend and three, you had just fucking kissed your best friend! ellie! the girl you’d been close to for years and nothing had ever happened. the girl who knew you better than anyone else, warts and all. the girl who a part of you wished was still kissing you.
“let’s just forget it happened,” she sounded defeated but she was probably right.
“yeah, yeah ok,” you agreed, trying to convince yourself that this was fine, “maybe we should just go to bed.”
she nodded and you both stood up, brushing some grass off of your ass before you both slumped towards the cabin.
“after you,” she mumbled, opening the front door. you whispered a thanks before you both ascended the stairs, trying to be quiet so you didn’t disturb dina and freya. you reached your doors, which were directly opposite each other. you looked at each other for a moment before you awkwardly poked her in the arm.
“ok then… night, ellie.”
you turned to open your door but suddenly felt a hand grip your arm. the pull forced you to spin around to face her, her other hand catching your waist and pinning your body to hers.
her hasty lips caught yours in another kiss, your hands flew to her hair and shoulders. this kiss was a far cry from the sweet one you shared outside. it was hungry and frantic.
you broke for air, foreheads pressed together, hands still holding each other close.
“let’s not think about it,” she said breathlessly. you couldn’t think anyway. you just nodded your head and pulled her into another open mouthed kiss.
she felt for your bedroom door handle behind you and pushed you into the room, immediately collapsing on the bed. the room was only illuminated by the moonlight coming in through the window. her body weight pressed into you as she deepened the kiss.
eagerly, she started unzipping your shorts making you buck your hips up. she shoved them back down with her hand forcefully and resumed pulling your shorts off. you blushed in embarrassment at how wet you already were and her finger tips fluttered at the waistband of your underwear.
“can i touch you?” she asked, her voice low.
“please.”
she wasted no time in bringing a finger down to press on your clothed clit. you moaned loudly, suddenly slapping a hand over your mouth.
“you gotta be quiet, baby.”
you frantically nodded, desperate for her to continue. she could feel the wet patch you had made and smirked to herself, pulling your underwear to the side and glided her middle finger through your slick folds.
“so fucking wet already,” she groaned. her finger collected your wetness before making slow, barely there circles on your clit.
“who is that for?” fuck you, you thought.
“y-you, ellie.”
her touch on your clit was so light it was making your body jolt at the sensitivity. your lips were parted and hers were ghosting over them, refusing any attempts you made at chasing a kiss.
she suddenly slid two fingers deep into you, restricting your moan with a hard, sloppy kiss. she moved them in and out a few times before curling them and hitting that spot over and over.
you whimpered when you felt her hand suddenly disappear but all she was doing was impatiently yanking your underwear off, muttering a “fuck” under her breath, before resuming her relentless pace.
she kissed you again to keep you quiet, as she quickly pulled her fingers out to rub circles on your clit and giving it a few taps before slipping them back inside.
your hands didn’t know what to do with themselves so with her free hand she grabbed one of your wrists and pinned it against the bed next to your head, using that along with her knees to hold herself up.
“oh fuck,” you cried.
“shh shh shh, i got you.”
your head was digging so hard into the pillow and you could feel yourself about to come. ellie could too by the way you clenched tightly around her.
“you gonna come, baby?”
you stumbled out a “yes” and lifted your head, begging for a messy kiss whilst she fucked you through your orgasm.
when you let out a soft sigh and your body relaxed, she kissed you on the forehead and slowly pulled her fingers out.
you looked up at her, feeling exhausted and in awe of the sight above you. you honestly felt drunk, even though you weren’t. she lifted her cum coated fingers up near your face and looked at them, not being able to decide whether she wanted to put them in her mouth or yours. you answered for her by taking her hand and swirling your tongue around her fingertips, before sucking them in completely.
“fuck,” her voice was quiet and husky, intoxicated by the way your pretty lips wrapped around her fingers. your eyes looking up at her at the same time nearly made her come in her boxers.
she was so mesmerised by you she didn’t even realise at first that you were sitting up, letting her fingers go with a pop, and shifting so that you were on top of her.
once her back hit the bed her hands went to your hips as you straddled her lap.
you pulled your t-shirt off, leaving you completely naked whilst she was still fully clothed. she practically gulped at the sight of your tits now on full display, a giddy smirk creeping onto her face. you trailed your hand down to the neckline of her t-shirt and tugged it. she got the message and took it off, throwing it across the room, not allowing her eyes to leave you for a second. your fingers traced over her nipple and down her stomach for a second making her flinch. you smiled to yourself and leant down to kiss her. her hands caressed your hips as you left kisses down her neck and then her stomach.
once you reached the waistband of her shorts you paused and looked up at her.
“can i?”
she nodded and you pulled her shorts and boxers down in one go, nestling yourself between her legs. you pushed her legs apart and licked a line up her cunt. she was also completely soaking, your tongue collecting the sweet taste when you started swirling it around her clit.
she grunted, gripping your hair in one hand. you worked your tongue around until she was basically shoving your head deeper into her.
“you taste so fucking good.”
she couldn’t help but grind herself against your tongue. but then you slipped a finger in and she was gone.
“oh god.” her voice was quiet and shaky.
you didn’t move your finger in and out, just curled and flicked it slowly whilst you continued assaulting her clit. soon enough she was gripping your hair tighter and coming on your tongue. she quickly pulled you up by your hair and slammed you into a kiss.
her hands grabbed your waist and she turned you both and pinned you to the bed again. she supported her weight on her forearms and looked down at you. you both stared at each other for a moment, slightly panting before you both burst out laughing.
she quickly put a finger on your lips and your hands flapped trying to cover her mouth as you both shushed each other.
she rolled off of you and laid on her back. you both slowly turned your heads to each other, again trying to stifle a laugh.
“what the fuck have we done?”
♡♡♡♡♡♡
tag list: @ximtiredx @mattm1964 @robinismywifee @gold-dustwomxn
an: sooo the hallway kiss was inspired by nick and jess in new girl… let me know what you think of this part!! 💜
#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams x female reader#ellie williams smut#spaceshipellie fics#best friends to lovers#ellie williams x you#ellie x reader#ellie smut#ellie tlou#tlou 2#ellie williams#ellie williams blurb#ellie williams fluff#the last of us
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TWITCH WAR
pairing: lando norris x driver!reader (brief cameos of charles and russell george)
warnings: swearing. rumplestiltskin. mention of george being a war criminal. wetting pants.
author’s note: not my best work, but this has been sitting in my drafts for too long. anyway, enjoy 💖
• • • • • • •
''Do I play with Y/N?'' Lando read the question out loud, seeing it in his comment section. ''Well, she always told me she was very good at like any kind of game and that she would kick my ass, but then I played with her and… let's say she's definitely not as good as me.'' The Brit bragged about his own skills, a smirk forming on his face.
He glanced at the incoming replies from the fans, enjoying their reactions. ''She asked to play together a few weeks ago and we did, but ever since then I haven't dared to play with her again,'' he grinned, ''whenever she asks me now, I just go offline.''
''Oh, she's gonna kill me when she sees this.'' He giggled like a schoolgirl.
She did in fact kill him when the clip of him talking shit was sent to her by fans and even other drivers. Not literally, that wouldn't be a good career move, but she took to Twitter to indirectly respond to Lando's ''claims''.
YourUsername: people, don't take the words of twinks seriously 😫
Y/N's clapbacks didn't stop there as she went live on Instagram not too long after Lando's Twitch stream. Fans obviously couldn't help but ask about the British driver.
''Do I still want to play with Lando? Nooo~ I don't want to stream with him anymore, I really don't.'' The grin on her face was a dead giveaway she was only teasing him. ''He's super bad, that Rumplestiltskin.''
''She called me Rumplestiltskin?'' Lando read the comment out loud, his eyebrows furrowed. ''What does that even mean?'' He couldn't really remember where the name came from, so he decided to look it up and was met with the character from Shrek.
He gave the camera an unimpressed look before moving on. ''You guys want to know a fun story about Y/N from our karting days?'' A smirk already appeared on his face.
''She was pushed off track by someone and she pissed her pants because of it.''
''It was water! I didn't wet my pants, oh my god!'' The driver exclaimed on stream, not believing that Lando actually told that story. ''We were like 9 years-old.''
''You know, Y/N, I think I also remember that.'' George chimed in, he had been amused by their little Twitch war ever since they started it.
She rolled her eyes upon George's words. ''Hey! It was probably you who pushed me off the track in the first place, you war criminal!'' Y/N clapped back at him.
''Anyway, Lando shouldn't be speaking at all when he still looks and talks like a 9 year-old.''
''Lando, should we invite Y/N to play with us?'' Charles asked the McLaren driver after seeing countless comments in his chat asking about the female driver.
The Brit loudly sighed, causing the Monégasque to burst out laughing. ''What's wrong, Lando?''
''Because of her, people keep asking me if I've hit puberty yet.'' He said, frustration audible in his voice, much to the entertainment of Charles and everyone else watching him.
Their ''beef'' came to an end when the media had started to pick up on their back-and-forths and tried to make it seem like the two close friends hated each other and that they would become a danger to each other on track.
''Are you worried that the words you and Y/N have exchanged over social media will have an effect on how the two of you perform on track?'' One reporter asked Lando in a press conference.
He shook his head. ''We're just joking around, honestly. We've been friends for a long time and we've always joked around with each other like this, so, no, it won't have an effect on track.'' He politely answered, slightly ticked off by the seriousness of it all.
Y/N had been placed into a different group for the press conference, where she was asked about their ''war''. ''There have been some harsh word exchanges between yourself and Lando Norris, are you two on good terms or is there some sort of bad blood?''
''Yeah, we hate each other,'' her sarcastic tone sticking out, ''that's why we voluntarily spent all that time together when we're not racing.'' Her answer gathered laughs from her fellow drivers and even some reporters.
''Also, when we're on the topic,'' she stated, ''just because Lando hasn't hit puberty, doesn't mean that I haven't.''
#f1 fic#f1 fics#f1 x reader#formula 1 fic#f1 x oc#lando norris x oc#lando norris x reader#lando norris x y/n#formula 1 oc#formula one fics
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far from sober | H.S
my masterlist
part II
summary: you’re incredibly drunk, and when you are it comes with you having an obscene lack of a filter. harry being the sweetheart he is, is trying to get you back into your hotel room in one piece. he was not ready for you to be so touchy.
warnings: alcohol consumption, drunk people (including close family members), fluff, sexual tension, brothers best friend, drunk crying lol
a/n: sorry I haven’t posted properly in a while! here’s a shorter piece while I work on some more stuff <3 plenty to come x
———
Saying you were a bit drunk was a drastic understatement.
You were stumbling all over the place, heels becoming impractical now you were so intoxicated.
Harry, who knew you were going out with some of your family and friends tonight at the bar, had no idea what he was coming back to.
You don’t remember actually intending to get this drunk, but your Aunty had been egging the group on to do some shots, and before you know it you’re well past tipsy. Even your mum was getting drunker than you’d seen in years.
So all the other boys who’d gone out— including Harry— walk into the hotel bar. It was as chic as the lobby, just adorning some more neon signs and rustic bar stools.
Harry had gone out with them to look at a heap of shit that you and your female family members had little interest in. They’d insisted you all stay and just have a couple cocktails, since it was a holiday after all.
It was to their surprise when your same eager aunt bounded up to them when they popped through the door to the bar. They had expected tipsy, but not hammered.
“Oh my god!! You guys will not believe how good the cocktails are here!” She swooned, and they all glanced at each other with an amused chuckle.
“I think I just might believe it.” One of the boys piped up.
Most of them dispersed to find their significant others, family or friends amidst the bar, and see how much chaos was being caused.
But you’d b-lined straight for Harry, regardless of whether he was seeking you out.
His brows shot up when you collided with his side, “Harry!”
Your arms wrap around his middle and you end up latching onto him, practically using him to keep yourself upright.
“Oh!” He speaks in surprise, hands jumping up to brace around your lower back.
“Are you absolutely hammered too, love?” He chuckles and you bury your face into his chest.
“Yeaaaaa…” you drawl, a smile spreading onto your face.
“Everyone else is rounding up their partners. Suppose I’m in charge of you, yea?” He suggests, rubbing your back.
“Wanna—“ you hiccup, “have a drink with me?”
He shakes his head with amusement, “I think you’ve had plenty, sweetheart. We should get you back to your room.”
Most of your drunk family were getting escorted out by their respective people, being taken up to their hotel room before they can drink themselves any sillier.
This included your brother, Leon, who had his longtime girlfriend pulled into his side, holding her half up and laughing a little at her drunken slur.
He came to a stop when he seen both of you, eyes flitting between your two figures. A small twitch of his brows suggested he wasn’t sure of how he felt about the sight.
“You got her?” He asks, a protective edge to his voice. One that drunken you missed easily as you stayed plastered against him— which is something sober you would not do in general, let alone in front of your brother.
Harry nodded straight away, understanding his defensiveness over you since he feels the same about Gemma. He said softly, “Of course, I’ve got her mate. I’ll take her up to her room.”
Leon glanced at you again. Harry and him met when they were 9, and they’ve been best friends since then. He trusts Harry with his own life, and knows he’d never ever do anything that would hurt you, but his protective side is still flaring up.
Only when his girlfriend, Brie, complains of feeling nauseous he curtly nods, and continues heading for the door.
You are again, oblivious to all this, running your fingers along the tattoos exposed on his forearm— his sleeves rolled up to his elbows— putting his gorgeous skin out on display for you.
“I loveee your arms.” You slur, and his eyes shoot from the door back down to you.
He rarely sees you this drunk, and you’re suddenly very close— making comments that for many reasons are bringing a flush to his face.
“Y/N, Jesus you’re hammered.” He shakes his head, still smiling.
He slowly starts walking, “Cmon, let’s go. Y’brother is expecting me to get you back to your room in one piece.”
“You definitely won’t have a drink with me?” You whine, taking a few steps backwards trying to tug him in the direction of the bar instead of the door.
“Nope. Maybe tomorrow if you can even stomach alcohol.” He pushes the doors from the dimly lit bar open, and leads you into the back of the lobby that it’s connected to.
You squint at the dramatic change in lighting, which is hardly helping your sense of perception, or lack thereof, from the alcohol.
Harry’s hand has taken yours though, leading you to an elevator.
You noticed how warm it was, smooth against yours, aside from the rougher pads of his fingers from the years of playing guitar.
Being so off it, you could not keep that thought to yourself.
“Your hands are so soft, H. Like silk.” You say as you walk into the first elevator to open, squeezing his hand.
“First time anyone’s ever told me they feel like silk. I’m flattered.” He smiles, squeezing back.
“what floor are y’on, by the way? D’ya even remember— or are we a bit too wasted for numbers?” A teasing lilt is in his voice.
You half-laugh half-hiccup, “it’s… 7…?”
“You hardly sound certain about that.” He nudges you with a laugh, “It’s 12, we’re on the same one, remember.”
You laugh much harder than any sober person would, which makes it funnier to him. Since it was a mediocre joke at best.
You’re still laughing as you touch his chest with your palm, “you’re not funny.”
His gaze travels down to it, and he’s shocked at how touchy you are. You never do shit like this when you’re sober. His own amusement quickly takes the back seat, even though you’re still giggling.
However your face falls shortly after, laced with a curious gaze as you slide the neck of his long sleeve to the side, in search for the swallows inked onto his collar bones.
He watches as your eyes wander the small expanse of skin there, and how your fingers brush the tattoos.
“Having fun?” He asks, trying to joke again, but really he’s undeniably a little worked up.
“Yah, heaps.” You snap your gaze back up to him as you enthusiastically nod.
He hates the fact he’s blushing so hard right now over this, since you’re drunk and not completely in control, but he at the end of the day is a man with a very pretty girl— which happened to be you— pulling at his top like she wants it off him.
You hum to yourself, “Have such a pretty neck.” And you trail your hand up it, running a finger over his adams apple.
The elevator door opens like a blessing, and he quickly moves to make distance between the two of you.
“Can you remember your room number, darling? That’s one thing I actually don’t know.” He looks to you as you follow him out with clumsy moments.
“Uh… I dunno— wait I think the keycard is in my purse.”
He laughs at this— wondering if it will come to you in time once you sober up.
“Fuckkk.” You groan. “My purse is in Molly’s big handbag.”
The groan soon turns into a whine, because drunk and being slightly inconvenienced is not a good pair.
“It’s ok!” He amends quickly, trying to keep from having a drunken meltdown on his hands, “We’ll just got back to mine, only if you’re comfortable?”
He quickly prepares for you to not want that, “otherwise— I’ll call her, she didn’t seem too wasted, I’m sure she can—“
He’s interrupted by you, “I don’t mind going back with you.”
You say it with a confused look on you face, a tiny pout on your lips.
“Why would I be uncomfortable going with you?”
“Because… well— I’m not sure. I just wanted to leave you with other options.”
It’s not like you haven’t spent time alone together before— you’ve actually spent plenty, but just never with you drunk.
And so touchy.
“No. It’s ok. I love being with you!” You chuckle.
He leads you down the hall, pulling the keycard from his back pocket once he reaches his room, 3313.
The door clicks open, and he holds it open for you, following you in shortly after.
You’re still unstable on your feet, and one look at those heels, he’s surprised you haven’t ended up on the floor in the last ten minutes
They’re practically a health and safety issue. He can not imagine you getting them off right now— which is exactly what you’re about to bend over and attempt.
Before you can throw off your centre of gravity, he quickly says, “Go sit on the bed.”
You glance back over your shoulder, face only lit by the light from the lamp in the corner of the room.
“That’s a little forward, don’t you think, Harry?”
He toes off his own shoes, shaking his head immediately at your drunken misconception of what he asked.
“So I can take your shoes off.”
You make the few steps left to the bed safely, and you sit at the edge of it, still giggling as you say, “just my shoes, huh?”
“Yes.” He walks over, kneeling down on one knee, pulling your heeled foot up onto the strength of his thigh.
He fiddles momentarily with the laced up string, warm hands splayed on your calf, and choosing to ignore the way your dress is riding up your thighs.
Christ. This is harder than he thought.
“I forget how hot you are sometimes.” You deadpan, and his jaw goes a little lax.
You’re usually playful, yes, but never do you breach into territory like this.
It was only others, like those at a family gathering, or your close friends, that would push to get stuff like that out of you like they were matchmakers.
There were many times that barbecues or some kind of event held at yours, Leon would invite Harry over. And if the two of you even interacted for just a second, someone in your family circle would tease you. Especially your own damn brother— it was a constant streamline of snarky comments from him.
“You are so drunk.” He mumble while pulling up your other foot.
You ignore his statement, thinking back to when he was a boy to now. He was cute— always was— but the way he looks now is just unmatchable.
“Have you always looked so… like… this?”
He chuckles, almost nervous, “what does question that even mean?”
“So pretty.” You clarify after a moment of trying to find the word.
“Ah, you’re only saying that because you’re plastered up the walls.” He laughs, and a dimple popped on his cheek, and your hand jumped into action before you could even think about it.
“Noooo, sober me thinks that too. She thinks you’re more than pretty.” You say, cupping his jaw, gently tracing the dimple that popped up.
He doesn’t know how to interpret any of this. His heart is jumping in his chest, and he’s trying to reason its genuinely just the alcohol in your system.
He holds eye contact as he slips off your other shoe, placing in neatly next to the other.
He stays there for a moment, unprepared for your next question.
“Can I kiss you?”
She’s drunk, she’s drunk, she’s drunk…
“You’re drunk, sweetheart.” He says, and it’s painful— because he wants to, so fucking bad, but you’re not in a state to consent to literally anything at the moment.
And especially not in the mind frame to be making decisions like this.
You lean forward anyway, before he has a chance to avoid it, managing to meet his lips on your own terms.
He caved for a brief flash of time, and allows a second for himself to feel it, no longer than that though. Just a mere moment to take in the warm, soft feeling of your lips on his. It takes so much strength for him to not kiss you back, he has to focus on the task at hand— sobering you up and getting you safely asleep.
He pulls back after that single moment, leaving his forehead against yours, “baby, I know, I really…” he cuts himself off.
A deep inhale and he stands up, “Not tonight. Cmon, let’s get you out of your dress. You can wear something of mine.”
He walks over to his suitcase, anything to remove you from his sight for a moment, to reset his thought process. He pulls out a tshirt and pair of gym shorts, hoping they won’t be too big on you.
Turning back around, he convinces himself he’s fine. Placing the clothes from his bag on the bed beside you, his hands come under your arms, helping you stand up on flat feet for the first time in hours.
You lean into the touch, turning around so he can undo the back of your dress.
The feeling of his fingers brushing your back have you going wild, and the way they gently slide the zipper of your dress down.
His eyes lock with the back of your lacy bralette and he chooses not to follow your skin any further down.
You use your hands to slip the straps off your shoulders— and very quickly the dress is pooling at your feet.
A shaky inhale passes through his nose as now you stand in just your underwear and a seemingly very pretty bralette.
He reaches and picks up his shirt from the foot of the bed.
“Do you want to… take this off before…?” He gestures to your bralette when he catches your eyes.
You nod, reaching behind you to undo the clasp and allowing it to slip from your shoulders to the floor.
Harry puts all his focus on getting the tshirt over your head to cover you up.
Once it’s over your whole frame, you can’t help but smile.
He’s so nervy and cute around you.
“Thanks, Harry.” You smile, suddenly feeling an overwhelming amount of adoration for him hit you.
It inflated up in your chest, and bubbled deep into the pit of your stomach.
It killed Harry to watch it happen, and although he had no idea what kind of thoughts were going on in your head, just seeing you light up like that…
You wrapped your arms around his middle again, just like you did when you ran up to him in the bar.
He placed his hands in your hair this time, taking in your scent— which was mixing with his own now that your were in his shirt.
“Love, if you were sober right now. God.” He confesses.
“Im sober enough.” You beg, even though it’s such a lie.
He still shakes his head against you, “‘M not gonna be that guy, Y/N. I have waited years just to have you. I can wait another night. Or week. Or a whole ‘nother year if that’s what it takes.”
This hits you hard.
And it felt like your 15 year old self could hear it up in the confines of your head it rung through you that loudly.
She loved him then, more than she’d ever admit. And sure, you’ve grown up from 15, but yet never once did you grow out of him.
As noted earlier, being drunk and inconvenienced is not a good pair. But being drunk and having someone say or do something sentimental like that is another level.
Tears immediately start to fall from your eyes, and he feels your chest shake at the sudden outburst of emotion.
He pulls back, thinking he’s done something wrong, or said the wrong thing, and an apology was immediately on the tip of his tongue.
But relief thrums through him as you tug him right back into the hug, “that’s— that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”
“The nicest thing a boys ever told me.”
“Sweetheart.” He coos as you cry, his own voice wobbly with emotion.
He feels like he’s on a roller coaster. 5 minutes ago it seemed all he could think about was the unspeakable things wanted to do to you, and now he just wants to lay you down and hold you until you fall asleep.
He forgets the shorts on the foot of the bed, shuffling the two of you up to where the head of it is— which was still unmade from last night when he’d slept in it.
He tugs you into it, pulling you tightly too his chest as your heads hit the pillows.
And he just hugs you.
Eventually, your crying subsides off, and you enter an indescribably calm state.
“I love you. I don’t even know if you’re going to remember this in the morning.” He sighs, “but fuck, I love you.”
“I love you too, Harry.” You whisper, before your eyes begin to fall heavy, and those words were the last to leave your lips before you fell asleep.
———
PART II, found here
a/n pt2:
back again guys, hello!
this is like an extended a/n, but I have a lil update. I saw harry for the very first time live 3 weeks ago. it was so so incredible, and the experience was by far the best time of my life. I miss harry so much i just feel sick ugh. he is perfect. auslot was amazing, he absolutely gave us his all.
that’s why I’ve been so absent on here, literally coping with my pcd a day at a time. I’ve written heaps but nothing I’m 100% happy with haha.
but anyways I just thought I’d share, thank you so much for your continued support and know there is plenty in the works x
all my love, <3
#harry styles#harry styles imagine#harry styles oneshot#best friend!harry#fanfiction#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fluff#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#best friends brother#harry styles smut#harry styles writing#harry styles x you#best friends to lovers#friends to lovers#drunk! y/n
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You Snooze, You Lose
John Stones x Reader
Warnings: childhood friends, losing touch, all the boys are so annoying, John is lowkey butthurt, a lot of assuming is happening, mentions of kidnapping, so many emotions, unspoken feelings and regrets, kyle is chief meddler, a little sexual humour, some friendly teasing, jack's love of gucci, divorce, alcohol and the consumption of.
Word Count: 3.9k
Author's Note: this is sooo self indulgent, shout out to pookie who helped me plot this <3 @themandaloriansdiaries
---
Childhood friends; a story as old as time..
Everyone knows how it ends, it either works out or it doesn't. You stay friends forever and live happily ever after or you love and you lose, you move on and they stay a chapter in the story of your life.
That's what John Stones was for you.
Your best friend from the age of 9 until you turned 19. The boy across the street, the one that walked you to school, the one you joined at practice, cheering him on from the stands at games.
While you had been focused on making it through school, John's interests were elsewhere. Football was all he thought of, a ball by his feet 24/7. He joined his boyhood club, Barnsley, and worked his way up until he signed for them in 2011. You still remember his debut, the sense of pride and joy you felt was incomparable to anything else in your life.
After a year of playing for the first team at Barnsley, he was off to Everton. John moved, of course, making it easier for him to be with the team. He still returned home but you saw less and less of each other.
By the time he was 22, he was signed to Manchester City and that was the end of the two of you, or rather whatever was left of your friendship.
Granted you were very proud of him and all he achieved, but it still hurt you to lose your best friend. It wasn't 22 year old y/n that was losing her best friend but 9 year old y/n who used to sit in the stands and watch him practice for hours on end.
There wasn't much you saw of John after that. Maybe a hello in passing if you saw him when he returned home to see his family but it became less and less frequent, until all you had left was seeing his face on tv.
8 years, that's how long it's been since you've seen John. Time flies when you've both moved on with your lives.
You find yourself in Manchester, rainy and grey as always but a familiar feeling of coldness reminds you of home.
The jewellers assured you that your ring would be ready in a week and you'd be back then to pick it up. Half past 3 and you've got time until you need to head to the station to get your train home so what better way to spend the time then to shop?
You find your way through the busy streets and into the shops, picking out a few odds and ends for the house, shopping basket on your arm as you make your way through the store.
A text had your focus, trying to keep in your corner as you walked and texted at the same time. You hadn't even noticed as you were walking straight into someone until you hit them. It felt as if you walked into a brick wall, the person was solid to say the least.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry," you say to the person, bending down to pick up your phone before they turn to see who's walked into them.
"Watch where you're going- y/n?" The voice sounds familiar, you think to yourself. How did they know your name?
You look up as you stand up, it takes you only a second to realize who's in front of you. "Johnny," you smiled, the nickname rolling off your tongue as it did many years ago.
"How are you?" The man asks, pulling you into a hug. You felt yourself relax, the feeling of his arms around you reminded you of home in the best way possible.
You take a step back, "I'm good, how are you?"
"Can't complain," he smiled, blue eyes twinkling under the horrendous fluorescent lights. "What brings you all the way to Manchester?"
"You say that as if Manchester is in a whole other part of the planet," you laughed. "But I came to the jewellers to get my ring fixed and I had some time before my train so I decided to do some shopping."
John nods, glancing at his watch. "It's half 5 now, most of the trains are gone by now, no?"
Your eyes widened a bit, "you're joking." Checking your own phone to see he was in fact right, it was half 5 and the last train to Barnsley just left. "Oh shit."
"How are you gonna get home then?" He asks and you shrug. "I'll probably take an Uber."
"No," he shakes his head. "I can't let you do that. I'll take you home."
It's your turn to shake your head. "Well I can't let you do that."
"Why not?" His brows furrowed, making you smile. "You've probably got things to do, big footballer like yourself." You joked.
John rolled his eyes playfully. "Shut up. It's fine. I'll take you home, I can't let you take an Uber, you're too pretty. What if the Uber driver decides to kidnap you? I won't forgive myself, you know."
You can't help but laugh, obnoxiously loud as well. Your hand covers your mouth, giggling behind it as you often did as a child. The action brings back fond memories for John. He smiles at you, his heart warm and fuzzy in his chest.
"What if you tried to kidnap me? I haven't seen you in years, I don't know what you do in your spare time now."
He chuckles, crossing over his heart with his finger. "I promise I'm not a kidnapper, you can call my mum and confirm."
"Fine," you tell him. "You're certain I'm not putting you out by accepting?"
"100 percent," he takes your basket from you, putting it into his shopping cart, pushing it down the aisle as you follow him. "I didn't even ask, where do you live?"
"Barnsley."
John stops and turns around to look at you. "Seriously? You never moved?"
"I mean I don't live in my parents' house anymore but yes, seriously." You laughed, nudging his jaw back around so he can watch where he's going.
The two of you cash out, John insists on paying for your stuff even though you tell him it's fine. He says okay but then removes the little separator between your stuff and his, putting it together without you noticing. You roll your eyes at his childishness, thanking him regardless. Ever the gentleman, leading you back to the car and carrying the bags before opening the door for you.
Certainly his car is worth more than your house but you got in, sitting quietly as he drove towards Barnsley.
The music plays in the background as he drives. "How come you never moved? From Barnsley?"
"It's home," you tell him, "plus not all of us become big footballers that can afford mega mansions."
John laughs, glancing over at you to see the smile on your face. "Speaking of footballers, I saw your last game. You were good."
"Just good?" he teased and you nod. "Mhm hm. You know me, I've always been more of a Liverpool girl."
"Ew," he makes a face, you can't help but laugh; something you did often in his presence. The short time you two had been back together made you feel like a child again.
Sometimes you still couldn't wrap your head around it. John, your John, the little blond boy from across the street was a professional footballer, and a damn good one at that. Playing for a treble winning team and for England, John was living his childhood dream and you couldn't be more proud of your best friend.
If you could even call him that anymore.
It was a short drive once he got off the exit, you directed him to your place. You lived 10 minutes away from your parents, you two used to walk these streets as kids, it was home after all.
John pulled into the driveway, his car looking out of place compared to the neighbourhood but he got out, taking your bags out of the trunk for you.
There's a man coming out of the house, putting his coat on and fishing his car keys out of his pocket as you get out of John's car. "Thank you for preventing my maybe kidnapping," you tell John, taking the bags from him.
He glances at the man and then back to you. "Yeah," he smiles, "anytime." He reaches for his phone, handing it to you. "Give me your number, so we can stay in touch."
You put your number in, telling him to text you so you could save his number. "Don't be a stranger," you say as he pulls you into a hug. "Even footballers have friends."
John laughs, a big smile on his face. "I know, I promise to text."
"Thank you again, for everything."
"Anything for an old friend."
You smile, "bye Johnny."
"Bye y/n."
John gets back into his car, watching as you walk up the driveway to the man who was by the front door. He doesn't pull off, but instead watches the interaction between the two of you. The man on the porch kisses your cheek before walking down to the driveway.
It takes John a moment to connect the dots; the ring at the jewellers, the house that looked like it was a happy home, the man on the porch, the kiss on the cheek.
You were married.
John's heart feels like it's been broken again, in a whirlwind of emotions; disbelief, regret, and a sense of longing. The realization stings of missed opportunities and unspoken words. Every laugh shared, every whisper, every stolen glance filled with love, every memory cherished now carried a bittersweet feeling.
The knowledge that he never confessed his love. It was unknown to you but John had always thought of you as his.
You were his y/n, his best friend, his girl.
No matter how much he tried to move on, despite the two of you never being more than friends, there was no woman compared to you. That's a horrible way to live, he can hear Kyle's words in his head, his teammate telling him he's got to get on with his life.
But how could he move on knowing you were still out there? All but a phone call away and yet he never reached out. He moved on with his life, achieving all he hoped, all but one thing.
He moved on and so did you. No one's to blame but himself.
--
Kyle finds his teammate picking at his lunch, pushing the pieces of chicken around his plate with the fork. "Didn't your mum teach you it's rude to play with your food?" He says, glancing at the younger player.
John rolls his eyes in response. "Oh, we're moody today." Kyle takes a sip of his juice. "What's going on?"
"I saw y/n last week." John mumbles, staring at his half eaten lunch.
Kyle nearly spits out his juice and hits John in the face. "Y/n? As in.. your y/n?"
"Bumped into her at the store and took her home."
"What's the issue, mate? You took her home and what? The sex was that bad? I guess years of pining will do that to a guy."
"Shut up," John groans at his friend's crudeness. "We didn't have sex, you jackass. She's married."
"Oh," Kyle makes a face, and it's as if John can see the gears turning in his friend's head. He knows whatever is to come out of Kyle's mouth next is going to be ridiculous.
"Well, do you want me to beat up her husband? You can run in and save him, you'll look like the hero and she'll fall in love with you and leave her husband."
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life," John chuckles, "but no."
Kyle shrugs, taking a piece of chicken off of John's plate and eats it. "I offered a solution and you don't want it. You can't beat yourself up over her being married. You snooze, you lose, Johnny boy."
"Have I ever told you how unhelpful you are?"
"All the time," Kyle smiles. John's phone buzzes on the table, the man glances over to see who it is. "Who is it? Is it her?" Kyle asks, sticking his head over to see who texted John.
He pushes Kyle's head away and reads the message.
To John: Hi Johnny, you're invited to dinner on Sunday.
To John: Well I'm inviting you now. Sunday at mine at 6pm, or anytime after that? Does that work for you?
"Say yes," Kyle tells him before he can even think what to reply. John shakes his head, "I don't want to have dinner with her and her husband."
"What if I beat him-" "Shut up, that's not an option."
Kyle rolls his eyes, taking the phone from John and replying before he could stop him.
From John: Hi y/n, thank you for the invite, 6 works great for me. Can I bring anything?
"What did you do?" John tries to get his phone back from Kyle but he runs over to the other table where Jack and Erling were sitting.
To John: Just your pretty face ;)
"Why would you do that, you idiot?" John smacks Kyle's arm, taking his phone back. "This is going to be the most awkward dinner of my life."
Jack turns to see John and Kyle fighting. "What's going on?"
"Johnny boy's got dinner with a married woman." Kyle says, telling everyone John's business. Erling makes a face. "A married woman? Is that like.. a kink for you?"
"No!" John groans, putting his phone into his pocket. "She's a friend that happens to be married. It's not what Kyle made it seem like." He glares at his friend, Kyle shrugs.
Jack asks the important question. "What are you going to wear? Do you want to borrow one of my Gucci shirts?"
"I'd rather not look ugly," John says, making Jack roll his eyes. "Opposed to.. you looking like yourself? So just double ugly?"
He huffs, "I'll wear something I have. It's only dinner."
"If you say so," Jack makes a face, clearly disapproving of John's fashion choices.
John grumbles as he walks off, "I hate all of you."
--
The days pass and John finds himself at your front door, heart beating out of his chest with nerves. He didn't want to have dinner with you and your husband. He wanted to turn back, to get into his car and leave.
He can't.
John's done scarier things, he's played matches that sent him into a spiral and yet, he's alive and well. One evening won't kill him.
It'll be in and out; dinner, small talk and then he'll leave with the excuse of an early training session.
He knocks, his palms sweaty. They take turns holding the bottle of wine as he wipes his palms on his jeans. The door opens, you're standing there with your hair over your shoulders and a big smile on your face.
"You made it," you stepped aside, "come in."
"I'm so sorry I'm late," he says as he walks in, noticing your bare feet he takes his shoes off. "I had a match and then we had the debrief and then I went home to shower, lost track of time and got stuck in traffic."
"Don't even worry about it," you tell him, shutting the door. John passes the bottle of wine over to you, "for you."
"I told you, you didn't need to fuss and bring anything." You accept the bottle with a smile regardless.
"It's no trouble, plus it's rude to show up empty handed." He says, watching as you walk to the kitchen. "Make yourself at home," you called out to him and John took that as his sign to poke around a bit.
He sticks his head into the living room, no sign of the husband. It's warm, homely. A couch against the back wall, tv by the window, fireplace along another wall. You've got photo frames hanging, some as decorations, some with actual photos.
There are three photos hung on the wall in the hallway, he stops to admire them. The middle frame had a little boy holding a baby wrapped up in a lavender blanket and the other two were what seemed to be school photos. The boy on the left and the girl on the right.
You peek out of the kitchen to see John looking at the photos. "Cute kids," he says. "Yours?"
Shrugging, you walk over to him. "Bought the house and they were on the wall, it seemed wrong to take them down."
"Oh," he makes a face, unsure what to say and you laugh, resting your hand on his bicep. "I'm kidding, they're mine. This is Sebastian," you point to your son and then your daughter. "This is Sophia."
"They're cute, they look like you."
"Genes are strong, Stonesy. Just like yours." You say, making him laugh. He nods as he knows what you meant. He and his sister were the same person, different genders.
"How old are they?" John asks while he follows you into the kitchen.
"Seb is 7 and Soph is 4."
"It's quiet, you'd think it'd be loud with little ones. Are they not home?"
"No," you handed him a glass of wine. "They're at their dad's for the weekend."
"Oh," John says, taking a sip of his wine. "You're not married?"
You make a face, one of disgust rather as you turned to your friend. "God no, ew. Why would you think that?"
John laughs at your face. "I just thought.. you said you had to get your ring fixed so I assumed your wedding ring."
"It's my blue one, the one you gave me for my birthday before you left for Everton." You tell him, checking on the roast in the oven.
John thinks back, he did gift you a ring for your 18th birthday, it was a few months before he signed for Everton. He thought it'd be a nice thing to give you, 18 was a big birthday plus he was officially making big boy money, not as much as he made now, but more than enough that he could afford to buy his best friend a nice gift for her birthday.
"I can't believe you still have that."
"Well I thought about pawning it off but the guy said he'd only give two pounds, so I figured I'd keep it. Sentimental value or something like that." You joked, John rolled his eyes at your words playfully.
"Yeah, yeah. Is there anything I can help with? I feel bad sitting around."
"Take the roast out of the oven? The pan is unnecessarily heavy." You set the plates on the table and John looks at you while walking to the oven. "You made a roast?"
"Well it's Sunday, isn't it?"
John nods, "it is. I haven't had a proper one in years, like actually sitting at the table and eating it. It's always left overs from mum because I had other stuff to do."
"It's so depressing," you chuckled. "Wait, I didn't even ask, can you eat this? Aren't you on some super footballer diet or something?"
"It's fine," he tells you, carrying the pan to the table. "One night won't kill me."
Dinner was quiet, the two of you chatted and caught up on as much as you can about the last 8 years. You talked about family, yours and his, he told you stories of his teammates and shared little memories he cherished from your childhood, you told him about your kids and how they drive you mad everyday.
It was nice, it was the grown up version of eating Chinese take out at 3am in the kitchen as teens.
You find yourself on the couch, each of you with a glass of wine and the almost empty bottle on the coffee table.
"I wonder, since you thought I was married, are you hiding a relationship?" You asked, finishing off your glass before setting it on the table. "Am I going to see myself in a headline somewhere? John Stones spotted cheating on wife with mystery woman." You both laughed at the made up headline.
"No," he shook his head. "I'm single, no need to worry." He mirrored your action and set the empty glass on the table before leaning back into the couch. "But if I can ask, what happened between you and your.. husband? Were you married ?"
"I was," you nodded. "We thought we could make it work but between work and the kids, we have no time for each other and we were miserable, even when we were together. It wasn't good for us nor was it good for the kids. So instead of the kids having one unhappy home, we decided to call it quits and let them have two happy homes."
"That's very mature of you both."
"I'd like to think so." You smiled. "What about you? How come you're single? You're young and handsome and talented."
"You think I'm handsome?" He raised an eyebrow. You roll your eyes, laughing as you smack his arm lightly. "Shut up, you know what I meant."
"Well, I never moved on.. from someone in the past."
"Oh.. someone broke your heart?" You shifted to face him fully. "Tell me everything."
John smiles, some things never change. "Sorta, I mean, not really. It was a long time ago and when I left home, I left her behind and I regret that. I shouldn't have left like that, we should have figured something out. I should have reached out but I didn't. I think I wasn't sure how to, so I never did.''
You nod, thinking. You understood what he meant but you were trying to figure out who he was talking about so you started naming off the girls he used to see while he was living in Barnsley and Liverpool.
"It's none of them," he says, smiling at your effort.
"So who is it?" You asked, brows furrowed. "I know all your exes."
John smiles at you, the twinkle in his eyes as he looked at you was a dead give away, and it hits you like a freight train. "It's.. me?" You look at him, your cheeks bright red when he nods.
It reminds him of when you two were younger, the two of you giggling until you're out of breath and red in the face.
"So pretty," he whispers, going to pinch your cheek. "Shut up," you mumble, swatting his hand away. John smiles, hand cupping your cheek.
A hand wraps around his wrist, the two of you looking at each other. In that moment, years of unspoken words hung in the air. Without a single word said, they both knew what the other was feeling - a feeling that had been buried deep within you both for so long.
With a soft smile, John leaned in, closing the gap between you. Your lips met in a kiss, pulling you into him. As they sat on the couch, still intertwined, John and y/n felt a sense of peace wash over them.
It was as if the weight of years of unspoken emotions had finally been lifted off their shoulders.
John's forehead pressed to yours, "do you know how long I've been waiting to do that?"
"Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to do that?" You giggled, kissing him once more.
--
tags: @thesnailus @alwaysclassyeagle @mehrmonga @callsignvenus @kmc1989 @ironmaiden1313 @muglermami
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Business Proposal || knj (9/?)
pairing: namjoon x f!reader || ex friends to lovers!au friends to lovers!au
Genre: fluff, angst, smut, slow burn, fwb!au, non idol!au, unrequited love
Warnings: slow burn, angst, fluff, flirting, semi-edited, smut, fingering, eating out, unprotected sex.
Rating: mature, 18+
w.c: 8.0
Synopsis: Namjoon is living on borrowed time, and it’s time to cash in. His father is months from taking his last breathe and his life long dream is to watch his oldest son say “I do.”
A/n: lol, hello, I'm sorry for being so MIA lately. I kinda have had half of this written since November but my mom came to visit me in Korea and I forgot about it haha. If you are still here thank you for sticking around! Enjoy! Let me know your thoughts!
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10 Years Ago
Things were finally looking up.
“If you just remember everything we have gone over you'll be fine.” He simply says like it's no big deal, waving you off.
You on the other hand are filled with the gnawing pain of your nerves. As you look down at your notebook filled with an equal mixture of correct and incorrect answers.
Maybe things weren't really looking up.
“I think we should do a few more.” You rush out, flipping to a new page. In that exact moment, the buzzer in Namjoon's hand goes off, and he stands up.
He pushes in his chair and walks to stand beside you, putting a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “Over studying is not the answer.” He says gently, giving your shoulder a light squeeze before walking away to pick up your drinks.
Your protest dying as you burn daggers into his back. You aren't sure if it's a good thing that he has so much faith in you. When you don't have an ounce in yourself. Especially when in two days you'll hopefully end your misery with the dreaded math final.
It's been two whole months since you've started your weekly tutoring sessions with Namjoon. You aren't completely lost in class anymore. If you are, you just come to the broad man and drown him in all kinds of questions. With this tactic you've even managed to get an eighty-five present in your last math test.
The only thing left for you to pass is the stupid final.
You have been seeing Namjoon a lot more this week. Scheduling, and practically begging him to squeeze you into his tight schedule since Monday. A request to brush up on equations and gain some clarity on things you might have forgotten. To say the least, your test anxiety has reached a whole new level. You visibly look exhausted, your skin is oilier than usual, sporting a few painful pimples on your chin, and your hair looks so greasy despite just washing it in the morning. You should feel slightly ashamed for even leaving your house looking like a hot mess, but your thoughts are suffocating. Staying in would make the panic in the pit of your stomach worse.
Especially when you and your tutor have recently discovered your inability to do word problems. The main reason why you keep calling Namjoon at three in the morning. Even though he thinks you're just being paranoid, especially with the silent sigh of defeat you hear through your phone speaker. He tries his best to reassure you that you're going to be fine at the end of the day.
“There will probably be three, five at most. He had said last night when you called.
Thankfully he had stayed up revising his final paper, instead of being three dimensions deep in dream land like on Sunday when you called. Still, even though he had muttered out a tiny complaint, he stayed on the line with you. Until you were calm enough to fall asleep again.
In just three months your acquaintance has blossomed into a full on friendship. Along with your sneaking suspicion that both Taehyung and Jimin like him better. It was obvious last Friday night when Jimin had a small end of the semester get together at his apartment. Namjoon got so drunk he performed the entirety of Grease Lightning on karaoke. Including the dance break with special guest and step brother Jeon Jungkook.
Later on in the night the older of the four cried about the final scene in the Titanic. It was a rollercoaster of emotions, but heartwarming to be able to see a different side of the Philosophy student.
“Look who decided to join us.” You jump, placing your pen down in your notebook, closing it to hold your page. You turn around, feeling a wide smile come onto your face when you lock eyes with the other source of your happiness these last few months.
“Hobi,” you exclaim, holding your arms out to him. He chuckles, and leans down giving you one of those awkward hugs one gives when the other person is sitting down. It only lasts a few seconds and then he is leaning his head back to plant a sloppy kiss on your cheek, making you cringe.
“Ew,” you pout, wiping your cheek with the back of your hand. He chuckles, pecking your lips lightly and then taking the seat next to you.
“Joon says you need a break from being a math wizard.” He chuckles, dragging your notebook to him. He places his arms over it keeping it hostage.
You whine crossing your arms in front of you, pouting like a child. “But what if I don't pass. I don't want to have to take the class a third time.”
Namjoon shakes his head, sets your chamomile tea in front of you, and sits down. “I already told you, you won't. I did the math last night. Even if you get a sixty five percent, you'll still be able to pass the class with a B.” He states firmly and takes a sip from his coffee.
You huff, sinking further into the chair. “I don't want a B, I want an A.”
Hoseok snakes an arm over your shoulders and brings you close to his side.” “Then you will pass the class with an A honey cakes.” He kisses your temple before resting his cheek on top of your head. You take a deep breath, nodding and snuggling closer to him.
“So are you two dating now?” Namjoon leans back in his seat, crossing his arms in front of him.
Hoseok waves an arm, brushing off the question that has been surrounding the two of you these past three weeks. “You know it's not like that.” He answers before you can. He pulls his arm away and sets them both on top of your notebook. He sends you a knowing wink.
“Yeah you out of all people should know it's not like that.” You back up Hoseok, sticking your tongue out at the other. “How's Rina by the way?” You challenge making the man next to you burst out in a fit of giggles.
You see, most of the things Jungkook told you about Namjoon prior to your first meeting have all been lies. Or just not the whole truth.
Namjoon was a broody person. He did put his studies as one of his priorities in life. And he didn't want a relationship.
Yet in the last few months you have gotten to know the career driven man. You've also managed to peel back some of his layers.
He did have his moments of indignation, but he could also be very playful and funny. This side mostly comes out when Hoseok is around or when he wants you to get your mind off the things that have been stressing you out. He does have a strong work ethic, but he also knows when to take a break.
There have even moments in your tutoring slash now study sessions when he forces you to take walks. He says it helps clear your head, but you also know it's his way to get his ideas to flow again whenever he feels stuck.
During these walks you've managed to find out more things about him. He loves museums because he's shit at art, and knowing that there are people out there who aren't makes him appreciate the art a lot more. At least once every two months he visits the tree he and his father planted his mother’s ashes at to update her on his life. He cares so much for Jungkook and his mother even if he doesn't show it all the time. And despite not wanting a relationship he has been head over heels for the girl he's been casually hooking up with for the last two years.
Though he won't come out and say it himself. You have witnessed the way his face settles down into something calmer. And his eyes light up whenever his phone rings and her name pops up on the screen.
He once spent thirty minutes talking about a joke she had told him one night. Spoiler alert, it wasn't a good one, but it was adorable watching him try to get it out in-between chuckles.
You also know he shares the same negative sentiment Jungkook has about your current relationship with his best friend. But just like he claims that his relationship with Rina is complicated. So, is yours with the ray of sunshine you get to now call friend.
“She's fine.” He shrugs, clearing his throat and looking out the window. You share a look with Hoseok before letting out a fit of shared giggles.
If someone had once told you that your strict math tutor slash friend would turn into a shy mess with just the simple mention of a name. You would've thought they were fucking with you. Even if it still surprises you a little bit.
“You should just ask her to be your girlfriend.” Hoseok chimes in.
Namjoon throws his head back groaning. “It wouldn't work out if I do, plus that would require for me to act like a boyfriend and I'm not ready for that kind of commitment.” He speaks with his eyes trained on the high ceiling of the cafe.
You lean forward placing your elbows on top of the table and wrapping your arms around the hot mug. “You already do Namjoon. A switch of labels is not going to change anything. And don't you think she deserves some kind of confirmation and respect when it comes to your relationship?” You finish tilting your head to the side.
“I do respect her though, which is why I don't want to ask her, like you just said a label won't change anything.”
You let out a sigh, “I didn't say that you didn't respect her. I just think that from a girl's perspective she might be feeling a little bit confused with your words and actions. You say the two of you aren't anything serious but then you act like you can't live without her. If I was in her shoes I would feel very frustrated. So, maybe you don't have to make this big grand gesture or ask her to officially be your girlfriend but just clarify things between the two of you. If you aren't serious about her then so be it but if you are then tell her that.” You finish and take your first sip from your tea.
“I agree with honey cakes, just be a little more straight forward that's all.” Hoseok shrugs before standing up.
Namjoon rolls his eyes, and looks between the two of you. “And what about you?” He counteracts childishly. You knew it was coming. In his eyes the two of you giving him advice when you're in a similar situation is a bit hypocritical. Plus you and Hoseok are on the same page so it's di–
“That's different.” Hoseok speaks before you. “And this is about your love life not ours.” He states stuffing his hands in his pockets.
“Whatever.” Namjoon brushes off. You sigh, aware that if you choose to continue the conversation it will end in the three of you having a petty argument. You look at Hoseok as he leans down, placing a delicate kiss on your cheek, making the man witnessing the affectionate gesture scoff in annoyance.
If he wants to say something he doesn't voice it instead he opens his leather bound notebook to a new page.
Hoseok ignores him and stands up straight. “Are we still on tonight?”
You nod. “I can't stay for long though I want to catch up on sleep.”
“Fine then just one movie it is.” He winks before turning on his heels. Leaving you behind with the grumpy man. He looks up from his journal, opening his mouth, but you raise a hand to stop him. “It's different Namjoon.”
Namjon clicks his tongue in annoyance and shrugs. “Whatever, let's just do one more world problem before calling it a day.”
“Fine,” you huff, sliding your notebook in front of you and opening it to a clean page.
Just one more day and you'll be free from this torture.
Hoseok's apartment is everything you expect from the maximest man. Just upon walking in you are hit with waves of bright colors. By the doorway there are different KAWS figurines that you can only imagine cost a fortune. Yet they greet you with their x'd out eyes as you remove your shoes.
Then you have to pass by the Supreme beaded curtain to finally enter the living room. A bright red leather couch is settled in the middle. With wine colored pillows and a black throw blanket that you've adopted since the first night you spent in Hoseok's arms.
Abstract art lines the walls behind the television. There are more figurines lining the shelves in between books, records, and framed pictures of his friends and families. Along with a few miscellaneous items that he's told you he's obtained over the years.
His TV is huge. Takes up almost the whole wall, but your favorite to watch movies since he installed a surround system upon moving in years ago.
You still remember the first night he invited you over. It was after spending two whole weeks texting non stop. He simply asked if you wanted to watch a movie with him and you thought why not.
One night led to another and now another. It always starts the same. The two of you spend days teasing one another through text. Lewd texts along with pictures. You come over for a movie and then you end up underneath him.
When it's over, he lets you use his shower while he orders takeout from the vegan restaurant a block down the road. And the two of you resume watching the movie as if neither of you were panting each other's names in pleasure.
A simple arrangement with absolutely no strings attached.
It was what you were expecting when you came over tonight. Not that you don't mind the nights in which you do come over and nothing happens other than the deep hearted talks over a slow record playing in the background. But that wasn't happening either, because ever since you arrived at his doorstep, the overzealous man has been quiet. Biting the inside of his cheek and moving around you far enough to raise suspicion.
It has your mind traveling back to the conversation that occurred in the afternoon. Was Hoseok having second thoughts? Or was there more to his actions than what you were picking up?
“Hobi,” you whisper the minute he enters his living room with a bowl of popcorn stepping over your legs that were resting on his coffee table. He silently settles down next to you, on the other side of the couch with a gap wide enough to fit a person in between.
Now you're more than positive that something is wrong.
You groan, “I think I'll just go home then.” You mumble, pushing the throw blanket of your shoulders.
This is enough to catch his attention. His eyes are wide behind his dark rimmed glasses and he sits up. “What why?” He tilts his head in confusion.
A dry chuckle escapes your lips. “You obviously don't want me around, so I'll just go. I need to go to sleep early anyway.” You shrug, slipping your feet in his fuzzy slippers and swiftly start making your way to grab your stuff in his room.
“No I–wait.” Finally, he speaks up, earning an eye roll from you that he can't see as your back is still turned.
With haltered steps you spin on your heel to face him again, “What? You've been acting strange since I got here. So, if you don't want me around I will just go home.”
At lightning speed he sets the bowl of popcorn on his coffee table, and stands up. He makes hasty steps towards you and when he is finally standing in front of you, he sets both of his hands on top of your shoulders.
“Don't leave…I'm sorry.” Hoseok's eyes cast down past your face. They settle upon the graphic on your old washed out t-shirt. He takes a deep breath and looks up again. His face twists into something you can't decipher. It's a look you've never seen him wear, and it settles hard into your chest.
He looks troubled, chewing on the inside of his cheek. His eyes dart to five different focal points. You know he's arguing with himself. When he finally looks at you in your eyes again. You can't help but shrink a little bit.
His features have hardened, and you want to reach out to smooth over the little worry lines in the middle of his forehead. Guilt washes over you.
For what?
You don't know but you hope more than anything that you'll soon find out.
“Can we talk?” He speaks up, letting his arms fall down, his knuckles brushing against your skin.
For a second you think he's going to pull away. Retrieve into his body, but when he grabs your hands and laces his fingers with yours. The guilt in the pit of your stomach dissipates and you're left with confusion.
When you don't answer his question, he repeats himself. This time differently, “I just think we need to talk, I've been thinking since this afternoon. I want to check up on you, and I guess us.” He clarifies, and now you're filled with a different kind of emotion. As much as you're relieved that you didn't do anything wrong per se. You are slightly annoyed that he couldn't just tell you that when you first arrived. Instead of ignoring you until you reached your breaking point.
Frustrated, you say slowly, “Then just say that, instead of ignoring me.”
Hoseok closes his eyes and sighs, nodding his head before speaking, “you're right I'm sorry. I just have a lot on my mind and I am not sure how to bring any of what I'm thinking about up.”
“Hobi, just say it. We agreed on clear communication when we realized that this was going to be more than just a one night stand.” You sigh, beginning to walk in the direction of his couch, stringing him along. “Whatever is on your mind, just say it.” You push him onto his couch and take the seat next to him, your body fully facing his, and you fold your legs beneath you.
He nods, running a hand down his face. “I don't think this is working anymore.” He whispers, eyes trained on his ceiling.
Okay you were definitely not expecting that, but instead of voicing your surprise, you squeeze his hand. Encouraging him to continue.
He does, “I think I'm slowly falling for you, well I don't know I'm confused about my feelings.” He whispers the end and falls quiet.
As much as you want to run away and hide at his confession. He looks troubled and you wouldn't be a good friend if you just left him to wallow in his thoughts. No matter the pressure that has settled in your chest. Or the fact that your heart thinks you're running a marathon, making your ears feel like they're about to fall off too.
With every passing moment you're finding that it's getting harder to breathe. You aren't dumb, the atmosphere has also changed, but it isn't because of his confession. It's because you are also a bit confused about your feelings.
You clear your throat, “W-What are you confused about?”
He stops his staring game with the ceiling, shifting his whole body to finally face you. “Do you know why both Kook and Joon are so against us?”
The question throws you off guard but you suppose it has to do with what he's going through. You do have an idea as to why your friends are raising a brow at your relationship. Jungkook’s warning the first day you met the barista is enough for you to get a rough idea of what they mean. But you want to hear it from him.
Still you don't know if you can trust your voice so you shake your head.
He continues, “I've never been in a relationship because I don't trust people to love me the way I know I can love them. So, I just sleep around, and when I get bored I break it off.”
“I know. They warned me about you when you immediately showed interest. And trust me I knew what I signed up for when we agreed to keep seeing each other. I don't expect anything more than what we are doing.” You tilt your head to the side.
“I know that's why I'm confused. At first that's all I expected and wanted. But then I don't know I feel so full and empty when I'm with you. I don't want you to leave when the night is over. You're the last thing I think about and the first thing I want to see. I've never felt this sure and comfortable with anyone ever, and I don't know what to do because we both know this isn't forever, your forever is with someone else, and so is mine. But for now I just want to be with you and know what it's like to fall in love and with you.” He takes a deep breath. “Even if it's just for a little bit. You know that next year I'll be leaving for that design school, and I'm sorry but nothing and no one is going to stop me. I've waited too long for this opportunity. I know I'm being selfish to ask you this, but can you please find it in your heart to let me be yours until then?”
Hoseok finishes. And you're left to your own devices. To deal with your emotions as they spill out of you in hot tears. You've never had someone confess to you so passionately before. Actually nobody has ever bothered. And even though it's semi depressing you can't help but feel on cloud nine with all his words wrapping around you in the warmth that he radiates.
Without thinking you kneel, and wrap your arms around his neck. “Okay let's do it.” You beam and he matches your smile. He leans in to kiss you but you place your hand over his mouth to stop him.
Confusion plagues him like a bitter sting. You laugh, “But only if you agree that when everything is over there's no drama between us, and if I ever get married you have to design my wedding dress.” You remove your hand, and cradle his cheek, rub your thumb over his eyebrow.
He chuckles, rolling his eyes. “You will get married.”
“Nah, but it's okay. I've accepted my faith.” You shrug, resting your forehead against his. His hands come up your cheek, squishing them slightly.
“You will honey cakes, that's why I'm already planning your dress design in my head.” He wipes your forgotten tears, and tilts your head to the side.
You feel your breathing get faster, as his heart shaped lips rest centimeters apart. “How are you so sure?” You whisper, swallowing thickly at the end.
He smirks, with a glint in his eye. Like he knows something you don't, “because I know someone who is also falling for you but they’re to dumb to notice “
“Who?”
“Secret,” he says before finally crashing his lips onto yours.
Hoseok’s room is equally as loud as his living room. It’s a little more diluted with simple decorations and a huge abstract painting on the wall in front of his bed. His bed takes up most of his space, adoring a black duvet with black sheets. He has three pillows and two of those you’ve taken ownership of. His brown dresser holds little trinkets of things he buys or finds in the pockets of his pants. It’s also home to a series of designer colognes. Your favorite one was definitely Terre d'Hermes. Somehow the smell always fills with comfort.
Your favorite part of his room–other than his bed–was his desk. They say you can tell a lot about a person by just looking at their work space.
He’s a messy artist. His sketches are always thrown around, or pinned on the corkboard hanging over his desk. He has two bookshelves filled with sketchbooks and magazines. Sometimes if you’re lucky he will leave his sketchbooks open, awarding you with a small glance of his work. He has different notebooks for different magazine cutouts. Each one labeled something like, ‘street’ or ‘formal’ or ‘one-day.’ The latter always peaks your interest but you’ve never thought to ask. He has a thousand different sketching materials, and so many colorful markers. You just know that he was that kid in class with the sixty-four crayola back.
He's passionate about his craft. A passion that shines through everything that he does. Especially when he’s sharing that passion with you. Now, as he lays you down onto his soft mattress. He kisses his way down your neck, slowly pushing your shirt up to reveal your stomach and the few stretch marks that appeared one day in your early adolescent years.
For years it was hard to be intimate with someone in fear that they would disgust your partner. But the one thing you learned while growing up was that most men didn’t give a shit unless they were getting it.
Yet Hoseok, your boyfriend, now.
He cares.
In a good way. The first time he saw you naked he almost came in his jeans. Your curves were all in the right places. You have enough skin to grip onto, and he loves all the marks and imperfections your body has.
He couldn’t understand why you were so beautiful in the soft glow of his bedroom lights? Why he didn’t have the words to describe how his heart was literally beating against his ribcage? Why for the first time in his casual dating experience he feared he wouldn't be able to give you the pleasure you deserved?
So, that first night together, he took his time. Trying to get his thoughts under control. He painted your body with featherlight kisses. Determined to leave his trace imprinted in your body for however long you two would engage with each other.
Everytime you came over. He did just that. He took his time, choreographing a dance with your body. It was a no-brainer that he had fallen for you. Something he knew shouldn’t have happened. He had plans for himself. He had a future mapped out since he was teenage. Though, he had the sneaking suspicion that you wouldn’t stop him from achieving his goals. That you would support him through everything. He should’ve stopped his feelings for you from growing.
He kept them quiet until his portfolio got accepted. Until he saw the brief glances Namjoon gave you when he thought you weren’t looking. Perhaps it was the jealousy that made him confess. Or that his time with you was now limited. Whatever the reason was that led him to his confession, he only hoped that you felt the same.
You giggle, the beautiful melodic sound grounds him as he wraps a calloused hand around your right breast, circling his thumb around the pebble.
You're his girlfriend now.
He, your boyfriend and he will bring down the moon for you tonight if you asked him too.
“What’s so funny?” His curious stare meets your amused one.
You had failed to keep your giggles at bay while he made out with you on his couch. He let a few of his own out when he had had enough of kissing and grinding in his living room, and guided you into his room.
He loved the sound, and he loved that it was only because after months of dancing this tango you were still shy underneath him.
“Nothing, it’s just that Mickey is staring at us.” You whisper gasping when he grinds his lower half against yours. Hoseok playfully rolls his eyes, reaching and turning around the newly added picture of his family dog on his bedside table. No more prying dog or human eyes around to interrupt the two of you.
His attention returns to you. Gaze burning with lust as he leans down, pecking your lips lightly. “Can you stay over?” He says, kneading your breast again. The teasing touches were driving you insane. But this is how you preferred it. Slow and intense, tangling your body with his, until the two of you became one.
“I’ll make an exception if you promise to drive me to my class tomorrow with a free coffee.” You smile, pushing your chest into his hand.
He shook his head, reaching down to your lips. “Hustler.” He mumbles, capturing your mouth in a slow sensual kiss. “You got yourself a deal baby girl.”
Your body shudders at the nickname. He only used it when it was just the two of you. He knew the effect it had on you. “Can I take your shirt off now?” He smirks.
You let out a pleasurable sigh, nodding your head, before verbalizing a soft, “yes.”
He pulls away, sitting back on his heels, peeling his shirt off before helping you with yours. He discards the two of them somewhere behind him. He pulls you towards him again, resting his forehead against yours. A bright smile adorning his perfect face.
It makes your stomach crumble, knowing that from this moment on.
Hoseok would always be the one who got away.
Your big “what if.”
Your biggest treasure. Your safe place. Your blueprint for a future with someone else. The love story that was made to end. But one that burned so bright that would have you telling your future daughter to never be afraid of love.
“Can we go slow today?” You run your hands down his torso, playing with the belt buckle of his expensive belt.
“I’ll go at whatever pace you want me to go, baby girl.” He reassures, his fingers play with the bra strap that had fallen down your shoulder.
You tilt your head, looking at him with soft eyes. And he swears he feels himself melt.
The next few minutes were a mess of soft kisses and clothes being discarded. Each article of clothing, landing with a soft ‘thud’ against his bedroom floor. You’re on cloud nine, his lips kiss down your neck, your collarbone. His hands part your thighs, baring your cunt to him. He sits back, mouth watering at how wet you are. He couldn’t wait for a taste.
He could never wait. And he never did.
He kisses your mound before wrapping his lips around your clit. He savors the sigh that escapes your mouth. He smirks when he immediately feels you grip his hair, pushing him further. Just like he couldn’t resist, you also couldn’t.
He sucked, distracting you from his finger circling around your entrance making you gasp in surprise when you feel him insert one. Slowly thrusting it as he licked you like a man who has been starved for weeks.
“Hobi,” You sigh, pushing his head further. He fingers you faster until he feels you clench around him, and he stops, making you whine.
“Please,” you plead. He chuckles against you, inserting another finger. This time he doesn’t give you time to adjust. You feel him thrust into you with no hesitation. His mouth sucking on your clit, swirling his tongue around it playing with the nub.
You were withering, moaning his name, and anything your mind could conjure up in this moment.
Overwhelmed with blissful pleasure, you grip his bed sheets, bucking your hips into his face. He groans, knowing you were on edge from how tight your grip on his head was now. And he did the one thing he knew would drive you insane. He slowed down, until he came to a complete stop.
“Hoseok,” you groan, slamming your hand onto his comforter. He chuckles, lifting his head. Your body was flushed, your lips swollen, your hair splayed out around you. He loves bringing you to this moment.
“You said you wanted slow.” He grins, taking his fingers out of your pussy. Loving the way it clenched over nothing now. Almost as if it was begging to be played with again.
You roll your eyes, pouting. “Not this slow. I want to come.” You say, sitting up on your elbows.
“Oh baby you will.” He winks, licking his fingers clean. He leans over, pecking your lips quickly. “You will come as many times as you want. But I want the first one to be around my cock tonight.”
You gasp at his words. You knew his mouth was lethal but sometimes it still surprises you. The lust lacing with his soft timbre made you weak in the knees.
“Fuck,” you whisper, grabbing his face and kissing him hard.
The word ‘slow’ is forgotten from either of your vocabularies, while the two of you kiss hungrily. Sucking on tongues, teeth clashing, hands touching and clutching onto anything and everything.
Hoseok lays you down on your side, climbing in behind you. His teeth nips at your bottom lip and he wrapped your leg around his hips. He kisses down your neck, while you help guide his cock to your entrance. He locks his eyes with yours as he slowly pushes himself in. His arms wrap around your torso, and he pushes you closer to his chest.
Both of your heartbeats are in sync. Racing against the clock, basking in pleasure that you never want it to end.
“Move please.” You say, lifting your face to kiss him.
He begins to move his hips, making you gasp into each other's mouths. It’s a sloppy pace from the start but you don't care. You want more, so you met his thrusts halfway. One of his hands palms at your breast. He alternates between swallowing your moans and leaving his mark on anything he can get his lips on.
“B-Baby.” He moans, resting his forehead on yours. “I’m close, are you?” He thrusts, letting out a low moan when he feels you clench around him.
He didn’t give you a minute to answer, before he was lifting your leg higher around his waist, allowing himself to reach the deepest part of you. “Touch yourself baby.”
You moan his name, letting go of his hand, your finger meeting your clit, rubbing it in circles. Trying to keep up with his unrelenting pace. And soon you feel him still behind you, eyes shutting in pleasure as he spills himself inside of you. His orgasm triggers the coil in the pit of your stomach as you feel your release wash over you in a tidal wave, making you push his cock and cum out of you. His fingers frantically come down to meet yours as he helps you ride out your wave. He whispers praises against your skin while you come down.
Hoseok kisses your lips slowly, chuckling before whispering words that you will forever hold near and dear to your heart.
“I love you.” He pushes your hair away from your face. “I love you so much to know that one day I’ll have to let you go.”
You giggle, turning in his arms, nuzzling your head into his neck. “I love you.”
You feel him laugh, twinkling his fingers down your spine, “Let’s get matching tattoos.”
You look up at him, raising a brow before shaking your head. “You just made me squirt, told me you loved me, and now you want to get matching tattoos?”
“What better way to commemorate the best ego boost.” He shrugs.
“You’re insane.” You untangle yourself from his embrace. You stand up, putting on his shirt.
“I didn’t hear a no.” He says smugly, putting his arms underneath his head.
“Because you’re an insane idiot who makes me agree to things like these.” You smile, before walking out of his room.
“Great, I’ll make an appointment.” He shouts after you, “I love you.” He adds after a moment.
You enter his kitchen, and turn on the lights. You can feel your smile take up your entire face. For a moment you realize that for the first time in a long time you felt happy.
So yeah, maybe, things were finally looking up.
“You’re late.”
Namjoon says after taking a slow sip from his coffee. He looks at you from over the rim of his glasses.
You roll your eyes, setting your bag down on the empty chair. “It's raining, and I forgot my umbrella. I had to wait for the rain to stop.”
“You could’ve texted to let me know.” He shrugs, setting his cup down on the coaster and flipping the page of his book.
You sigh, before (gently) throwing your phone onto the table. “It’s dead. And before you ask, no I didn’t bring a charger. No, Jungkook wasn’t in class today so he couldn’t give me a charger, an umbrella, or a ride. Jimin is sick. And Taehyung doesn’t even go to our school. He's probably getting high with his new fling, so I wouldn’t have been able to ask him either.” You say, listing all the solutions he would’ve thought about in seconds.
“Mhm,” he nods, closing his book. “And your boyfriend?”
Annoyed, you let out a whine, crossing your arms in front of you. “I don’t know, let me go downstairs and ask him. I’m sure he can stop managing a business to give me an umbrella.”
Namjoon leans his elbows against the table. “Trouble in paradise?” He tilts his head, clasping his hands on top of his book.
You shake your head, pulling out your chair and slumping down in it. “Hobi and I are fine. It’s not like he’s leaving in two months or anything.” You throw your hands up in exasperation.
It’s month seven into your shining relationship with Hoseok, and you should’ve known that things would start to hit the fan sooner rather than Later. Your boyfriend was in the middle of the most tumultuous change of his life. Things were moving quickly and his time dedicated to you was bumped down his monstrous daily to-do list.
Yet you couldn’t do or say anything because isn’t this what you signed up for?
“Ah, so there is trouble.” Namjoon chuckles before opening his book again, setting his fancy leather bookmark aside. “This is exactly why I don’t do relationships, they just attract problems.” He adds, giving you a pointed look.
You roll your eyes, “Shut up asshole, not all of us can be like you and Rina.”
“Sure you can, it's simple just don't attach any strings to it.” He shrugs, underlining a sentence in his book.
“Two people who have been only exclusively seeing each other for years literally the definition of strings attached. You can keep denying it all you want but she’s your girlfriend. You guys do all the couple-y stuff.” You grumble, leaning back in your chair, looking out of the window. The gloomy weather adds to your shitty mood.
“She’s not, we are not dating, and I don’t need to talk about this with you again. Rina and I are on the same page.” He finishes, taking a long sip from his coffee.
“Well, how would you feel if Rina was spending time with another guy, completely ignoring your presence when you walk into her coffee shop all wet and angry because your professor basically told you your topic for your essay was shit.”
Namjoon smirks, leaning back in his chair. “Sounds like you’re jealous of Yuri.”
“So what if I am?” You bite, “I understand that he’s training her to take over his position, but all he talks about is her and what he needs to teach her when we’re together. And whenever I come in they’re always laughing at something behind the coffee machine. And I know she’s nice and all but I would like his attention too.” You scoff.
Namjoon hums, tapping his index finger against the table. “Do you trust him?”
The question doesn’t catch you off guard, the obvious answer is on the tip of your tongue. But with how things have been going lately. You can’t help but hesitate.
“I don’t know anymore.” You whisper looking down at your hands, turning the ring on your middle finger. “I know I should, and I do…I think I do. It’s just things have been so shit lately and I feel like a burden to him because of everything he has to do.”
Namjoon lightly kicks your foot under the table, making you raise your head to meet his gaze. “I don’t know if I am being of much help, but he loves you. I know that whatever is happening he’s not doing it intentionally. Just talk to him about it.”
If only it were that easy.
“I’d love to but he never has time.”
“Why not talk to him now then.” He says reaching into his bag to take out his cigarettes and lighter.
“He’s busy downstairs with Yu–”
“No, I’m not busy now.”
You jump at the sound of your boyfriend's voice. You turn your head to look at him. A small tray with a mug of probably chamomile tea on top of it. His hair is shorter than the last time you saw him two days ago. He got a haircut and didn’t even tell you about it. That’s how low you have made it on his list. He can’t even send you a stupid picture of his new haircut. He can’t even send you a ‘goodmorning’ or ‘goodnight’ text. He also probably forgot that you were nervous for the meeting with your professor about your essay topic.
All these realizations make you want to roll into a ball and cry. You knew your time with Hoseok was limited. You just didn’t expect for the end to be so torturous.
“That’s what I told her.” Namjoon speaks, narrowing his eyes at you for a second before turning his attention to his best friend. “She’s jealous of Yuri, because you’ve been spending too much time with her.” He shrugs, walking quickly to the stairs before you can bury him ten feet underground.
You hear Hoseok let out a heavy sigh, and take the seat next to you. “Honeycakes,” he starts.
“Nice haircut.” You interrupt, slumping into your chair more. It earns another heavy sigh from the man sitting next to you.
“Is Yuri the reason why you’ve been so upset lately?” He says placing a hand on top of your knee underneath the table.
You let out a dry laugh before shaking your head. “No, it’s not her. It’s how you’ve been acting lately, it’s the time you’ve been spending with her. It's never having time for me anymore. It’s forgetting our date last week. It’s not even telling me that you got a haircut.” You finish, closing your fists to keep yourself from crying.
Hoseok gives your thigh a squeeze before leaning back in his chair. “You know how things have been lately. I’m trying so hard to do everything I need to do. I don’t mean to be so dismissive but I can’t juggle everything at the same time.”
You flick off a piece of lint from your jeans. “It’s nice to know that I’m just something you juggle around.”
“That’s not what I meant. You knew what would happen when I started my application process. You said you understood.”
“I did, or I thought I did Hoseok. I didn’t think I would become so secondary to you.” You sniffle. “I love that you’re chasing your dreams, but this is me trying to support you. I’m trying to understand how you’re feeling. But you stop me. You have shut me out and now I’m just something you remember sometimes.” You close your eyes, feeling the tears fall down your cheeks.
The last thing you wanted was to be crying like this in public.
“I-I want you to tell me when you’re having a hard time like you used to. I want you to feel like you can relax around me when we’re together. But every time we are together, we either argue, you don’t talk, or you talk about work, deadlines, or how you can’t wait to move. How do you think that makes me feel Hoseok?”
Hoseok sighs, and wraps his arm around your shoulders. “I’m sorry.” He kisses your temple. “I wish you would’ve told me earlier before it got to this point.” He whispers, rubbing your back, while you lean your head onto his shoulder.
“But Hobi like you said, this is what I signed up for. This is what I agreed to.” You add bitterly.
“Yes Honeycakes, but you’re still my girlfriend. And I know that I haven’t been the best boyfriend lately, but I do care about you and I do love you.” He lifts your head from his shoulder. He gently grabs hold of your face, making you look at him. “Just like how you want me to talk to you when something is bothering me, I also want you to talk to me.”
You close your head sighing, “You’re right, I’m sorry that I keep making things difficult.”
He shakes his head. “You don’t. I’m the one that can’t seem to keep my girlfriend from doubting me. I’m the one who hasn’t told her how much I yearn to be in her presence at every waking moment.” He says, his thumbs wiping away your tears. “I love you, and I think that’s why I’ve been so avoidant lately. I know that our days are numbered and I would rather ignore the fact that I’m moving away soon than cherish the moments I get to spend with my family, my friends and you.”
You nod, holding out your pinky out to him. “I promise to keep trying my best.”
He hooks his pinky with yours bringing your laced fingers up to his lips. “I promise to keep trying my best too.”
“I love you,” You whisper, letting go of his finger and wrapping your arms around his waist.
His low laugh makes his chest vibrate against your head, “I love you.” He adds, rubbing soothing circles over your back. “Now, can you please drink your tea before you get a cold. I texted you earlier asking if you needed an umbrella but you didn’t answer. And now look at you coming in here all pouty and wet.”
You raise your head to look at him, opening your mouth to speak, only to be interrupted by the forgotten voice of your friend. “Her phone’s dead.” Namjoon throws his lighter onto the wooden table.
Hoseok tsks shaking his head, reaching over to push the tray of your lukewarm tea closer to you. “I should’ve known. I knew you didn’t charge it last night, just like I knew that you left your umbrella at my place.” He pinches your cheek. “How did your meeting go?”
“He basically said that I need to restart my essay topic over again.”
Hoseok laughs, bopping your nose with his own. “Well did he say those exact words?”
“No but it was basically implied.” You emphasize.
“Fine, I’ll talk to your study partner if my baby isn’t being told that she’s a genius all the time, then what am I paying him for.” He jokes, which earns a glare from said study partner.
“You’re not paying me, idiot.” Namjoon rolls his eyes, grabbing his brown leather messenger back and stuffing his cigarettes into the front pocket.
He’s grateful that he came back to smiles and not tears. The stoicness of his actions makes the two of you laugh hard. Your laugh resonates longer in his mind. It always does. No matter how much he tries to deny it. You always resonate longer in his mind. But he pushes that fleeting thought aside.
Namjoon is happy.
His friends are happy.
Things in his life were finally looking up.
“I have to go, but don’t be late next time and charge your phone.” He says hoisting his bag onto his shoulders.
You nod, saluting in his direction, before bursting out into a fit of giggles as Hoseok tickles your side.
Namjoon doesn’t stay for longer than he needs to. He’s already running late to meet Rina, but he can’t hide the smile taking up his space.
He can’t help but feel proud that things were finally looking up for you too.
a/n: I hope you have enjoyed it. I will try not to be so MIA and upload a little more frequently rather than every 6 months haha. But my life has been pretty busy lately. In the past few months. I have moved to a different part of Seoul and I got a new job. I basically just hang out with my friends when I have free time haha. I also do dance class 3 times a week, and I started personal training last week. But I will try to manage my time better because I do miss writing and this story!
#kdiarynet#bts fanfiction#bts imagines#bts smut#bts fics#bts scenarios#bts army#bts jhope#bts namjoon#bts angst#bts fluff#jhope smut#Namjoon x reader#jhope x reader#Namjoon fluff#Namjoon smut#Namjoon angst#hope angst#Namjoon fanfiction#Namjoon imagines#Namjoon fic#Kim namjoon#jung hoseok#Namjoon bts#j hope bts
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Wing Man Part 6
Fic Summary: Steve 'the Hair' Harrington is your best friend, and is constantly striking out. Sick of this, you two make a deal; you'll wing man for each other. Hooking Steve up with dates is easy, but he finds himself struggling to find you a date. At least, until Dustin starts talking about his new cool friend Eddie. (1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9)
Chapter Summary: What DID he mean by five? The second meeting.
5.1k words
A/N: How are we feeling in a post-"Flight of Icarus" world, y'all? I knew from the beginning that I'd want to add some of the lore in and let me tell you, I LOVE Ronnie Ecker. For those of you who did not read the book, or haven't had a chance to, Ronnie is Eddie's best friend who ended up with a full scholarship to NYU. They're siblings, your honor.
Also if anyone can show me on this map where the plot is going, I'd really appreciate it.
This late at night, the only sounds in the trailer park came from the occasional dog barking and the echoes of Eddie’s tapes blasting as he pulled up to Wayne’s trailer. His uncle was working tonight as usual, which would normally allow Eddie time to hog the tv before passing out for a few precious hours before he had to get up for school.
Tonight however, his mind was buzzing with what had just happened less than an hour ago. He liked you, he wasn’t sure how much yet but he did. You were sharp and knew your stuff about metal. It helped that you were cute. Really cute.
He liked seeing you in the passenger seat of his car, matching wits with his friends and ranting about Ozzy. He liked seeing you laughing and the way you watched him play. He really liked the way you had fiddled with the pick he’d thrown at you at the end of the set.
Eddie had never done that before. He’d wanted to, but never had anyone’s attention like that before- no. That wasn’t true. There had been one other person who’d listened to him play like that, two years ago.
Was he always gonna fold to the site of a pretty girl actually paying attention to his music?
“Of course you are.” Ronnie’s voice echoed on the phone. “And I’m gonna laugh every time you do.”
Eddie groaned, holding the receiver to his ear as his forehead pressed against the front of the fridge. He hadn’t planned on running to her with this, but he was nowhere near able to wind down. He hadn’t even expected Ronnie to pick up the phone this late at night with the time zone difference and the fact that it was a school night. He’d have to push his stash a bit harder to pay Wayne back for the long distance call.
The past two years had been a slow crawl of building back trust up with Veronica Ecker. The two had gone almost a whole summer without talking before Eddie had basically groveled for forgiveness outside of Granny Ecker’s trailer before Ronnie left for New York. She had forgiven him enough to let him give her a ride to the airport.
“Last time?” He’d asked.
“Last time.” She’d repeated.
“So why didn’t you shack up with her tonight?” Ronnie asked. “You got her into your van, and you dropped her off like a gentleman.”
“I don’t know, I panicked.” Eddie sighed, bonking his head against the fridge a few times. “She was right there, and she was leaning in and all I saw was Paige leaning in-”
“You know not every girl who shares your taste in music is Paige, right?” Eddie could practically see Ronnie rolling her eyes on the other end of the line.
“Any girl that shares my taste in music ends up fucking off to the opposite end of the country.”
This made Ronnie laugh. “You’re an idiot. Paige fucked off back to her job and I fucked off to college.”
“Fucking off is fucking off.”
“Maybe you need to fuck off.”
“I tried, remember?”
She remembered. Both of them remembered.
“Look, stop being a dipshit.” Ronnie said after a moment of awkward silence. “You’re graduating this year, right?”
“Uhhh...”
“Eddie.”
“Yeah, yeah I’m working on it. I just need those last stupid two classes and then I’m home free.” Eddie confirmed.
“You can’t stay in high school forever.” Ronnie said. “And you’re gonna realize that there’s life outside of Hawkins. Have you even talked to Paige since then?”
He hadn’t, and they both knew it. Eddie gave up two months after she’d bailed him out of jail. Two months of dead air silence. He got the hint.
“No.”
“Then stop worrying about one girl from over two years ago!” Eddie could feel the phantom pain of Ronnie punching him in the arm like she always used to. “Get laid and graduate, Munson. You earned it.”
Eddie snorted, sliding down the fridge to sit on the cool floor. “Is that the only advice you got for me, Ecker?”
“It’s the only advice you need. Did you pass that test last week?” Ronnie asked.
“By the skin of my teeth.” Eddie sighed, leaning his head back against the fridge.
“Your new girl graduated, maybe she can help you study.”
“She’s not my girl. She’s a girl that I’ve met a handful of times-”
“That’s turning your brain to mush.”
“She doesn’t even know who I am, Ronnie.” He fiddled with the chord in his hand, watching the spiral wind and unwind around his fingers. It was already stretched out pretty bad, with a few spirals already tangled beyond repair like his old slinky from when he was a kid.
“Isn’t that a good thing?” Ronnie asked. “She doesn’t know you, that means she doesn’t feed into the bullshit of the rumor mill.”
Ronnie had a point and he hated it, but that’s why he called her to begin with. Ronnie was the only person who could cut through his Munson bullshit and give it to him straight. He missed it. As much as he enjoyed the power he had to protect his little lost sheepies, they were all too intimidated to actually stand up to him and call him out the way that Ronnie would.
“Yeah, you’re right. As usual.” Eddie could hear her snort and he couldn’t stop himself from grinning. “So why the hell are you even awake right now? Up til 2 am on a school night, Ecker?”
“It’s barely past midnight, the time zone isn’t that off. I was studying for a test, but hearing you complain about your love life is a far more productive use of my time.”
“You’re using me to slack off, aren’t you?”
“If I have to look at my flashcards one more time tonight my eyes are gonna go square. How’s Granny doing?”
“She’s an empty nester and is determined to turn me into her replacement grandson until you visit again.” Eddie shook his head. “She threatened to give me a haircut the last time she dropped off a plate for Wayne.”
Ronnie had come back to visit a grand total of five times since she’d left, returning for holidays and summers to visit Granny Ecker and by extension Eddie. Each time she’d come back with stories of law school and how different New York is.
It seemed impossible, everything that Ronnie had told him about going to college and about life outside their small town. She was playing Dungeons and Dragons still, having found a group that would play with her. According to her, being a rules lawyer for the game at a law school hit way different than it had their small Hellfire group in high school. No one even cared that they played outside of a few students who had better things to do than enact violence against a few nerds.
Then again, in law school everyone was some sort of nerd. Eddie wondered if even a freak would be accepted there. Well, socially at least. He wasn’t delusional enough to think he’d be able to be accepted into law school with his grades. Ronnie had invited him up to visit a few times, but there was never time or money to do it.
The two continued talking for another hour, catching up until Ronnie was scolding him for staying up so late on a school night.
“Yeah? And what’s your excuse?” Eddie said. “It’s almost 4:20 am there.”
“Ha. Ha. Again, ha.” Ronnie said. “Still not how timezones work. And my first class doesn’t start until noon.”
Right. In college you didn’t have to wake up at the ass crack of dawn every day.
“Night, Ecker.”
“Night, Munson. Graduate and get laid.”
“Does it matter the order?”
“Good night, Eddie.”
Talking to Ronnie had eased his nerves, but there was still something inside that wouldn’t let him lay down and go to sleep. It was late now, way later than he intended to stay up tonight. The night he played at the Hideout always had him up late, and his teacher already considered him more useless than usual on Wednesdays. It’s not like anyone would care if he slept in class, unless they were in a particularly foul mood.
He made his way to a stack of books in his room rummaging through a pile or two until he found what he was looking for. Eddie’s copy of Lord of the RIngs was well loved at best, and completely trashed at worst. The cover of the paperback was nearly torn off, taped back together haphazardly over the years. Pages were dogeared, the spine was cracked, notes were scribbled in the margins, and his name was scribbled in messy cursive on the front page declaring that this book belonged to Eddie Munson and that he was in third grade.
Eddie stripped out of most of his clothes, tossing his jewelry on his nightstand, and hopped into bed. He turned on a small lamp and opened the book. He could probably recite the first chapter from memory if he tried, the words on the page a comfortable lullabye for his wound up mind. But tonight he flipped to a page near the end where his bookmark was. The flower made out of blue construction paper wasn’t nearly as old as the book, and only in better shape because it never left the safe pages of Tolkein’s writing.
His eyes glanced at his arm again, your phone number a temporary tattoo on his skin until it washed off. Shit, it was going to wash off eventually. Eddie grabbed a pen from under his bed and added another scribble to the inside of the book before copying your number carefully onto the paper flower. At least this way he’d always know where it was.
With that aside, Eddie didn’t make it through three pages of his book before he passed out with the light still on.
Fall Semester, 1984
The PrinciPAL’s office was just as interesting and inviting as it always was, which is to say not at all. Eddie was slumped back on a chair, watching as Janice sorted through paperwork, pretending to look busy so that she could avoid any small talk with ‘that Munson boy’. He had been waiting for Higgin’s to show up for almost fifteen minutes now, because why shouldn’t he waste Eddie’s time at this point? The worst that was going to happen today is that they’d do their little song and dance, Eddie would plead his case that the flyers were absolutely serious and that Chris Morrison had every intent to run for student council, and that it was all of the club that had made the posters, Higgins would shake his head and not believe Eddie for a second (which to be fair, this would be the first time that Eddie would admit privately that it was his fault), they’d go back and forth until Eddie got some form of detention or Saturday school.
Honestly, the worst part would be rescheduling Hellfire if he wound up in detention.
Eddie had counted out 13 paper clips that Janice had used in her papershifting before the door to the front office opened up again. He looked up, expecting to see Higgins walk in, ignore him for another five minutes, before Janice would let Eddie go in.
He didn’t expect to see you, pale and shaken, clutching a teacher’s note in your hand. Eddie watched as you handed the note over to Janice who read it, shook her head, and pointed at the chair next to himself. Your eyes never left the floor as you sat next to him, staring at the cheap carpet as if you could somehow burn a hole in it and disappear.
Trouble was no stranger to Eddie, and Eddie was no stranger to trouble. In Hawkins the name ‘Munson’ might as well be in the thesaurus next to the word. This wasn’t his first rodeo, and it would be far from his last as long as Higgins stayed the princiPAL. He’d walk away with a lecture and a sigh and then it would be business as normal.
The look on your face though, that was far from the mild annoyance he felt. You look downright traumatized at the idea of having been sent here. Eddie glanced up at Janice who deigned to make eye contact with him now. Her eyes flicked between the two of you, a disapproving look behind her purple frames as if this was somehow Eddie’s fault that you had ended up here as well. But then, as far as any of the faculty from the office was concerned, even him being enrolled at this school was a death sentence to the rest of the poor student body. Eddie was a disease that they would try to contain until they had the cure to remove him.
The shaking of your knee made your chair (and his chair by proxy) rattle slightly. The quiet of the office and the mundane shuffling of Janice’s papers only added to the tension that was radiating off you.
“Janice, is Higgin’s gonna be long?” Eddie finally asked, and your bouncing knee stopped for just a moment before going back to its nervous movement.
“He’s in a very important meeting.” Came the reply over a stack of papers, still not looking at Eddie.
He sighed again and looked over at you, trying to place where he knew your face. Your eyes were a bit red, and you looked like you were on the verge of crying. Shit, he needed to do something before he had to ask Janice for the tissue box.
“First time?” Eddie asked, and when you didn’t respond he nudged your knee with his.
You jumped slightly, head snapping up. It was a wonder you didn’t give yourself whiplash and it would have been almost funny to Eddie had you not looked like a deer in the headlights looking at him.
“I... Huh?” your voice cracked slightly.
“What are ya in for?” Eddie did his best to give you a smile which he was sure made him look more like a serial killer than a comfort. It was rare he wished that he had his dad’s smile, but in cases like this he’d make an exception.
You looked at the paper in your hand and swallowed. “Uh... skipped.”
“Skipped school or just class?” Eddie prompted, trying to get you to talk more. If you were talking, then you weren’t crying. That’s what he hoped at least.
“Class.” He didn’t think you’d say anymore but you surprised him. “US History.” Eddie caught the way your eyes darted to Janice again as if to make sure she wasn’t listening in, but Janice had better things to do than to eavesdrop on two delinquents. “I wasn’t... I had a bad day. I'm having a bad day. I felt like I was going to explode and I went to the library.”
Eddie nodded, wondering what had happened today that made you need to duck out. It wasn’t his business, and frankly Higgin’s was going to grill you enough as it was.
“Rookie mistake.” He said instead.
“Rookie...?”
Eddie kept his voice low and leaned in closer to you as if telling you a secret. “If you’re gonna skip, you can’t go to the library. You might as well have walked into the teacher’s lounge and announced that you were cutting class.”
You let out a sharp breath that he swore counted for a laugh. “Thanks for the heads up, can you tell me that a few hours ago?”
There was color returning to your face now and Eddie kept going. His brown eyes scanned your face, trying to place where he knew you from. Hawkins was a small town, and there was nothing about you that screamed ‘I’m new!’.
He liked your sarcasm though, and his ‘comforting’ grin shifted into a genuine smile. “If you’re gonna ditch, you need to go to the bathroom or go outside.” He said. “Especially for last period. Go hide outside in the woods and you can slip into the parking lot seamlessly without anyone noticing. By the end of the day the teachers are barely taking attendance anyway.”
“Have you been in the girls rooms here?” you asked, shaking your head. “I think I’d rather take my chances here than stay in there longer than I’d have to.” Eddie wasn’t sure if you were trying to make a joke or if you were serious.
“Would you rather hide in the boys room?” he asked. “I swear it only smells like piss almost all of the time and you’d end up in the splash zone even if you were in a stall.”
That got a laugh out of you, a genuine one. Your shoulders were relaxing and you looked down at the paper again and took a deep breath that you exhaled with a sigh.
“I’ve never been in trouble before.” you said, your hands starting to bend and fold the paper on your lap absently. “I’m not good at being in trouble.”
“Well, lucky for you I’m here.” Eddie nudged your knee again with his. “Being in trouble is kind of my job here at Hawkin’s High. I’m a professional, you know. If I wasn’t here taking up all of Principal Higgin’s time he might have to actually do his job.”
That last part was louder, as he directed it to Janice who refused to take the bait and only reached for her lilac stapler instead.
A small smack on his arm drew his attention back to you, you were smiling at him looking astonished. “You’re gonna get us in trouble!” you whispered at him.
“We’re already in trouble.” Eddie reminded you, his smile never fading. “Look, you’ve never been in trouble before, right? You’re gonna be fine. Just give him a good sob story about being overwhelmed with school, or about a sick pet. If you can squeeze out some tears that’s even better. The worst that he’s gonna do is give you a slap on the wrist and maybe detention if he’s in a shit mood”
You take in his words, listening to him carefully and taking in every word he was saying as if this was life or death. Eddie admittedly, had purposefully slipped into his Dungeon Master voice. It was a skill that normally only worked on his little sheepies in his club, and that was after semesters of training his players to listen and pay attention to his words or else it would be life or death for their characters.
Having someone else listen to him like that? It felt really good.
Your mouth started to open to say something but then the office door opened again and Higgin’s stepped in, nodding to Janice and then looking at the two of you. There was an accusatory look in his eyes as he made eye contact with Eddie again, and it was clear what that look said. Leave her alone, don’t make things worse for her than they already are.
“Munson.” Higgins said and it took everything in him to stay still and not flinch at his last name. He was used to the weight that came with his name, but he hadn’t wanted you to know who he was. Not after he just remembered where he knew you from, glancing down at the note that you had folded into a flower in a fit of nerves.
“I heard you missed me, Sir.” Eddie forced his eyes to meet Higgin’s. “You really should just start saying hi in the hallways instead of inviting me to these little chats every week. You’re taking away valuable learning time from me, you know.”
If the two of them had been alone, Higgins would have snapped back at Eddie about being a smartass. But you were there, and the color had drained from your face again, and there was a shine to your eyes that was threatening to spill over your waterline. Higgins looked at you and motioned for you to follow him into his office.
Eddie wished that you would turn and look at him before disappearing into the PrincePAL’s office. He could imagine you turning to look at him for comfort, he’d give you a smile that would put you at ease and a thumbs up. You’d give him another smile and walk in feeling brave.
Instead it was like you forgot he was there as your figure disappeared behind the heavy wood door that shut with a heavy click.
Of course Higgins had you come in first, even though Eddie had already been sitting here since the beginning of the period when he’d been called in.
He was tempted to go over to the door and press his ear up against it to listen in on what he was saying to you but even Janice would scold him for that. So there Eddie sat for another ten minutes as he waited for you to step out again.
Higgin’s was the one to open the door and let you out of the office, as if he were some gentleman instead of Eddie’s own personal warden five days a week. You walked out and to Eddie’s surprise you gave him a nod and mouthed thank you as you slipped back out the door and into the hallway.
Eddie’s eyes followed you until he couldn’t see you anymore and it took Higgin’s standing in front of him with folded arms and saying his full government name for Eddie to snap back to reality.
“Munson. A word about your little flyers?”
“Well, I’d say a picture is worth a thousand words-”
“In my office.”
Eddie didn’t remember much else about that talk, only remembering the white paper flower that had been carelessly tossed into the trash next to Higgin’s desk.
“He still hasn’t called you?” Steve asked as you, him, and Robin continued your closing routine. The day had been busy, with almost everyone in Hawkins coming to rent a movie for the weekend. Robin was stocking the candy while you wiped down the sticky counter where children had been touching all day. Who’s idea was it to leave out free suckers on the counter anyway?
Oh right, that was your idea because you loved Halloween.
“Nope.” you said, your voice a little tense. It had been almost two weeks since that night at the Hideout. You hadn’t returned to the dive bar, hoping that Eddie would call you and make the next move. Each passing day you had stayed as close to the phone as possible when you were home and you’d checked your voicemail every day when you got home for any sign that he’d attempted to reach out.
Nothing.
You shouldn’t feel this rejected but you did. It was far too early to tell if you had any feelings beyond initial attraction to the guy, but... you’d felt something. An enjoyment of bantering with him and an ease that came as naturally as your friendship with Robin and Steve.
Plus, you had to admit it, he was really fucking hot. Seeing him play guitar two weeks ago had haunted your dreams and slipped into a few of your fantasies when you were alone.
You kept that part to yourself though, that was the last thing that Steve or Robin needed to hear. Besides, that was Steve’s job to go far too into detail about his sex life. Steve had tried ribbing you about going home with Eddie but you’d told him that you were a complete gentleman with him.
That night had left you feeling electrified, almost high as you danced around your room as you got ready for bed. Even as his odd parting rattled around your brain, you couldn’t help but to feel excited at the idea of seeing him again.
Then a few days went by. Then a week. And now two weeks later you hadn’t heard from him. The kids hadn’t stopped by either so you couldn’t hassle them about Eddie either. Even if they had, you weren’t sure if you could ask about him, you didn’t want to come across as desperate.
“Did you ever figure out what he meant by ‘five times?’” Robin asked, opening up a squished package of Reese's Cups. “Like, didn’t you say you didn’t know him?”
You threw your hands up before tossing the paper towels you were using to clean in the trash can.
“I have no idea.” you said. “Either I’m bad at math, he’s bad at math, or maybe we’re both stupid.”
“He did get held back a few times.” Steve muttered to himself.
“There’s a chance that you two have met before though.” said Robin, “I mean think about it, you’re both weirdos who went to the same school. Shouldn’t you both have bumped into each other before?”
“You’d think so, but my group kind of kept to ourselves.” you said with a sigh. “We were private weirdos. When I DID try and make other friends-”
“Yeah, yeah, Chris Morrison shot you down.” Steve said, waving his hand.
“Oh, you heard that story?” you laughed. “I didn’t think I mentioned it to you before.”
Steve gave you a blank stare that only made you laugh more. “I swear you keep talking about that guy more than Eddie. Maybe I should track him down and set you up on a blind date with him instead.”
“Don’t you dare!”
“Hey, that could be fun!” Robin added. “We’ll dress you up super hot, set you up with Chris, and then you can turn him down instead!”
“Excuse you, Robin. I am always super hot.” you declared, straightening out your unflattering Family Video vest. “Who wouldn’t want a piece of this?”
You hadn’t done laundry in a week, and your hair had seen better days. The green polyester vest was wrinkled and if Keith saw you looking sloppy he’d probably have words about it. Not big words or even intimidating words, but words nonetheless. It was night and day compared to how you’d looked at the Hideout and the arcade earlier in the month. But it wasn’t like you had anyone to impress while you were at work anyway.
“Hey, nerdy chicks can be hot.” Steve said. “I mean, Nancy’s an academic nerd and I was crazy about her.”
You hummed thoughtfully and turned to Robin. “How about we get married instead?” you asked. “You, me, a fuck ton of cats, and a tax break. What do you say?”
Robin laughed and shook her head. “You aren’t my type.” Her eyes darted nervously to Steve for a split second and you sighed dramatically.
“Guess it’s just me and the cats I’ll eventually adopt.” you said. “Not even a tax break.”
“You know, Keith thinks you’re cute-”
“I am going to pretend that you did not just say that, Harrington.” you said firmly. “Nope, not happening. Uh-uh. Absolutely not.”
“He’s not... that bad?” Robin said, but you could hear the pain in her voice through the laughter. “Methinks the lady doth protest too much.”
“The lady is trying not to think actually.” you laugh. “We’re closed, I’m actually done thinking. I just wanna finish cleaning up and go home. What’s left?”
“Rewinding the returns,-”
“Ugh.”
“Cleaning up the kids movies,-”
“Ugh.”
“And cleaning the bathroom.”
“UGHHHHHH.”
“Would you rather clean up the porn room?” asked Robin.
“Yes actually, I would.” You said. “Whatever they think about doing in that room is what they do end up doing in the bathroom.”
“Gross.”
Steve sighed “Okay, I’ll be the hero and save you ladies from cleaning the bathroom. Robin, you fix the kids section, and you can rewind the tapes.”
“I thought I was in charge here.” You crossed your arms.
“Okay, did you have a better way to divide and conquer?”
“...No.”
“Then let’s hurry up and-”
Ding!
“Who didn’t lock the door?!” you asked.
“It was Steve’s job to-” Robin started.
“Oh, shit. Hi.” Steve was staring at the person who had just walked in. You turned around and your heart jumped in your chest and your stomach dropped.
“Cursing in front of customers, Harrington?” Eddie said. “Now that’s not very professional of you.”
Robin’s eyes were darting so fast between you and Eddie that you were surprised she wasn’t giving herself vertigo. You tried to give her a pointed glare but your friend either didn’t get the hint or refused to.
“Well, we’re closed. You can’t be a customer if you can’t pay.” Steve said, putting his hands on his hips.
Eddie looked away from Steve and made eye contact with you. It had been two weeks since you’d seen him, and you glazed at his arm for a second, trying to see if the faded remains of your phone number were still stamped on his arm. Unfortunately for you he was wearing a heavy leather jacket and you had not yet developed x ray vision. Perhaps in another genre.
“Do you want to get out of here?” Eddie asked and you, ignoring Steve who looked mildly offended.
You stood there in shock for a second before Robin nudged you in the rib.
“I- uh. I have to finish closing.” you said, snapping out of it.
“Steve and I can handle the rest of closing!” Robin grabbed Steve and shook his shoulder.
“Guys, I’m literally in charge of you both. I can’t leave before you.” You said, already reaching for your bag under the counter.
“We can handle it!” Steve said.
“And I can handle Steve!” Robin added. “We close without you and Keith all the time, remember?”
You could trust Robin, and as long as Steve didn’t knock down any displays then it wouldn’t take them more than another ten minutes to finish up. You were so tempted to turn them down, make Eddie wait as you had waited for him for the past two weeks.
But you were already stepping behind the counter towards Eddie and tossing the keys to lock up to Robin. Keith would murder you and write you up (in that order) if he knew what you were doing but looking up at the roundest pair of brown eyes you’d ever seen had you in the mood to make questionable choices.
You shrugged off your vest and tossed it at Steve, in an attempt to make yourself look like you hadn’t spent the whole day dealing with unruly customers and screaming kids. Part of you almost wished that you had agreed to bathroom duty, if only to give you an excuse to look in a mirror and straighten yourself out.
“Thanks, guys.” you gave them a quick nod, catching sight of Robin’s knowing smirk and Steve shaking his head before walking out the door that Eddie was holding open for you.
The last thing you heard was the scrambling of the entrance to Family Video being locked.
Part 7
Dividers by @strangergraphics
Please comment and reblog <3
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Quarterly Fic Rec List 2023 #4
Hello! This is the last list of 2023! These are the wonderful fics I ended my year with! I hope you enjoy them! If anyone would like to be removed from this list; please let me know! As always each of these fics has its own content warnings, and most, if not all are 18+ so Minors Do Not Interact!
Seokjin
daydream @joonie-beanie
summary: Your literature professor has a bit of a…gift. A gift that let’s him see other peoples thoughts when he wants to. And despite the fact that he warns his class openly about this gift, one day you forget, and find yourself in a bit of pickle when Kim Seokjin reads your mind, and finds you imagining some not so school appropriate scenarios…involving him.
pink panther @gimmesumsuga
summary: The one where your boss, Kim Seokjin, tries to show you how beautiful you are
9 months to fall in love @floralseokjin
summary: It seems like everyone around you is either already in love, or in the process of falling, and while normally you couldn’t give a damn, finding out the co-worker you’ve had a teensy crush on is dating someone else at the office seems to sucker punch you right in the gut. It’s stupid, and you’re irritated at yourself, but you can’t seem to shake out of the funk you’ve fallen face first in. Feeling lonely and heartsore, and mad for no reason, during drinks with your best friend you spot a man at the bar. Tequila confident, you make your way over to the stranger, and successfully one thing leads to another. The next morning you leave before he’s woken up, feeling satisfied in one way, but still as discontented as ever. Telling yourself it was an inebriated mistake, you quickly try to forget about it. Only, three weeks later that night comes back to haunt you – in a very unescapable way…
dream come true @sugaurora
summary: Since your brother had warned you years ago that his best friend Seokjin was off limits, you’d only allowed yourself to safely fantasize about him in your dreams. You’re not sure why tonight his lips feel so much softer and his hands so much warmer than usual, but you’re also not about to complain.
whole @yoongiphoria
Yoongi
can't afford love @dollfaceksj
summary: Your childhood dream of having 2 children in a big house with a blooming marriage by this point in time has been eliminated the moment divorce came knocking at your door. With only one child and finding yourself back at square one, you ask your ex-husband—Min Yoongi—if he’d be down to fulfill 1 of these 3 things on your childhood’s bucket-list. And no, it’s not giving you a big house.
u suck !! @kithtaehyung
summary: Jimin’s cul-de-sac is filled to the brim with autumn leaves, trick-or-treaters, and halloween spirits. but the scariest part of the night? yoongi himself. and the way he looks downright sinful in his costume.
three tangerines ^
summary: throughout high school, you sometimes caught glimpses of your brother’s older friends: some of them were sweet, some of them were smart. but the one closest to him? that guy was a total f*ckboy from day one. after a foray of horrid relationships spanning years - ending with one that broke up with you for an alarming reason - you needed advice on what the hell you were doing wrong… and this wasn’t a conversation for anyone sweet or smart.
broken pt. 1 ^
summary: chilling conversations prolong things even further… until everything goes to hell.
ghostface killers @gimmethatagustd
summary: You’ve had your eyes set on Yoongi for as long as you can remember. What you didn’t know is that he’s had his eyes on you, too.
red & white @sweetestofchaos 💜
summary: you and yoongi have something to share this holiday
Hoseok
spookie coochie @gimmethatagustd
summary: The only monster Hoseok wishes you were interested in finding this Halloween season is his monster c–
drink champagne in my airplane @bangtanintotheroom
summary: Your friend Hoseok decided to use his excessive wealth for good and take the both of you on a much-needed vacation. The flight was meant to be relaxing until he broke out one of his most expensive bottles of champagne.
a holly, jolly crisis @kpopfanfictrash
summary: At this time last year, you thought you had it all. A kick-ass screenwriting job for the hottest TV show in LA, an actor boyfriend whose career was taking off and an affordable apartment with not one, but two bathrooms. Fast-forward to now and you’re single, soon-to-be jobless and searching for a way to scrape together January rent. Everything seems to be falling apart, which was why you told your family you weren’t coming home for the holidays. Enter your little sister, Sara, who recently became engaged to her boyfriend, Yoongi and needs you home to celebrate. The biggest problem? Returning home means you’ll be forced to face everything and everyone you left behind, including Yoongi’s best man – and your ex-best friend, Hoseok.
12 lays of christmas @minisugakoobies
summary: Your brother’s best friend Hoseok really likes your cookies
it's a promise @sahmfanficbts
arranged marriage au
Namjoon
close, closer, closest @augustbutwinter
summary: you know your soulmate is close, but you haven’t met them yet. every day your counter goes up when you pass that one station. until one day it doesn’t.
make an effort @7ndipity
summary: When you ask Joon to be your fake boyfriend, he ends up finding out about your very real crush on him. Luckily for you, the feeling’s mutual.
a word from our sponsors @ugh-yoongi
summary: you’ve co-hosted a podcast with namjoon for three years; have known him even longer. the two of you have always been the picture of platonic, but that hasn’t stopped the internet from doing what the internet does. the shipping? a little weird at first, but you can understand it: two attractive twenty-somethings always in close proximity to one another, obvious (platonic!) chemistry—people have created ships for less. the fanfiction, though? also pretty funny… until you can’t stop thinking about it.
Jimin
cloud nine @suga-kookiemonster
summary: “he’s here again,” viv whispers. “you know who. the hot guy who’s totally into you.” and he is hot--devastatingly hot enough that you know he can’t actually be into you, because the universe simply doesn’t work that way. that still doesn’t stop your heart from pounding when he smiles at you from across the room.
menace @eoieopda
summary: Far and away the worst of your brother’s friends, you added Park Jimin’s presence in your life to the long list of grievances you held against Seokjin. Too bad you can’t keep your hands off him.
crescent bound @parkhabits
summary: One night you’re having the best hookup of your life and the next you’re being told that the little mark on your neck is more than just a hickey and that Park Jimin was more than you expected too.
the dark side of the moon @dovechim
summary: falling in love at first sight is cliche, not until it happens to you on a dark night in a lonely alley. but you’re only human, while Park Jimin is Alpha of his pack; it could never work out. so you resort to pining for him like a wolf howling at the moon, but when Jimin goes feral, that’s when everything changes.
a remedy for mondays ^
summary: all you wanted was just one day off work. but for that to happen, you need to invent a plausible reason. and then somehow, somewhere along the way, things get out of hand, and now people think you’re having a baby with your co-worker Park Jimin after a one-night stand. confused? join the club.
heavy petting @kittae
summary: Your boyfriend is not just a cat hybrid, he’s also very needy! When you come home from work and you expect him to be all over you, you’re fairly disappointed to find he prefers a nap over some well-deserved quality time. You’ll make sure to pay him back for that.
the devil in his details @johobi
summary: Evil comes in many forms. In this instance, it’s a 5′8″ pretty-boy with an even prettier dick. And you’re the form you want him to come in.
me, you, and this thing we have between us @boymeetsweevil
summary: You’re pregnant and jimin is…happy about it
devil's advocate @7cypher
summary: You had met the devil on a hot summer day. He had shown up in a red polo, red cap, and white sneakers on his feet. That day, you had invited your devil into your home and he hasn’t left since.
no strings @kpopfanfictrash
summary: It started off as such a simple question. How to know if you’re bad in bed? Of course when you asked, you didn’t imagine Jimin would actually answer.
the ten days of ex-mas @kpopfanfictrash
summary: Three months following the worst break-up of your life, you finally feel ready to start moving on. The world, it seems, has other ideas when you pick up the phone and find your ex-boyfriend calling. Jimin Park, star right winger of the NHL and (until recently), the love of your life, has a very large problem. Despite the courage he regularly shows on the ice, in his personal life, Jimin is kind of a coward. When you broke up this fall, he could barely admit it. Not to his neighbors. Not to his friends. Not even to his family, who are expecting him home for Christmas. In a desperate plea for more time, Jimin begs you to pretend you’re still dating – and to his surprise, you agree. Faced with a second chance, Jimin is determined not to squander it. If only fixing a relationship were as easy as falling in love.
Taehyung
midnight @sailoryooons
summary: Taehyung loves being your prince charming, even if it means trying to find where you’ve wandered off to in the middle of a Halloween party without your shoes.
the holi-date @kpopfanfictrash
summary: When your ex-boyfriend becomes engaged to his new girlfriend at your annual Holiday party, you admittedly are not in the best place. Which explains why you down six shots of alcohol, enthusiastically drop it low on the dance floor and – oh, yeah – tell everyone you are also dating someone. The only problem? You are obviously not. Good thing your neighbor happens to be cute and in need of a ride to work every morning.
of lace and lust @hobidreams
summary: friendship rule number one: don’t imagine how amazing your best friend’s cock would feel inside you. except that’s all you can think about after accidentally discovering taehyung’s kink for panties. specifically, the lacy ones you’re so fond of wearing.
hush @suga-kookiemonster
summary: four seats, five bodies. “careful, sweetheart,” he breathes into the shell of your ear, hands tightening over your waist in warning. you lick your lips, pausing just long enough to ponder: what if you don’t want to be careful?
rotten angelcake @inkedtae
summary: she’s as sweet as angelcake; he likes her honeyed rotten. this is a series following the complicated relationship between a sugar baby, sugar daddy and his corruption kink.
sausade @kimvvantae
summary: no one is born to be alone and no one can be complete in oneself - that’s why, in this world, every person has a pair, someone that complements their soul in every aspect. you, however, are an exception to the rule, for the mark on your wrist indicates that your pair has passed away way before you were born.
kinda hot @kimnjss
summary: you’ve always been cute, soft, tiny in taehyung’s eyes. but that’s changing one night when you’re accidentally sending him a naughty picture. forcing him to realize, maybe his best friend is kinda… hot?
Jungkook
jungkook drabble @euphoricfilter
summary: obsessed gf m/c and equally as obsessed boyfriend jungkook. he’s the light of her life, and she’s the reason he smiles
blessed with a curse @sweetestofchaos
summary: When your company throws a mandatory Halloween party, you aren’t thrilled. You’re even less thrilled when a delusional coworker ruins the party and places a curse on everyone because her crush, the resident werewolf, Jeon Jungkook, rejected them.
seasons don't fear the reaper @augustbutwinter
summary: life is short, they say. one day everyone meets their death, they say. how often can you meet yours before he takes you with him?
because i love you ch. 13 @readyplayerhobi
summary: According to society, Jeon Jungkook should not be with you. He should be with a younger, hotter and thinner girl instead of wasting his time on you. It’s a good thing Jungkook doesn’t care what society thinks then.
a holiday snowdown @kpopfanfictrash
summary: The Inn on the Hill is in trouble. Or that's what your boss, Namjoon, says during the last-minute All Staff holiday meeting he calls. You need money, and you need money fast, or his parents are planning to sell the resort. When no one can think of an easy solution, Namjoon proposes his parents' idea: a weeklong social media blitz with a celebrity guest. The celebrity? None other than Jungkook Jeon himself: two-time Olympic gold medalist, world-class snowboarder and the nation's sweetheart. What's the problem? You happen to have met Jungkook Jeon before, and sincerely hoped you'd never see him again.
all grown up @btsgotjams27
summary: A family reunion brings back the young boy you grew up with. Though he wasn’t the doe-eyed boy you once knew, he stood in front of you all grown up.
this is us ^
summary: you start to fall hard for jungkook.
OT7/Multiple Members
carnival of terror ch. 2 @theharrowing
summary: The carnival is in town, and it is unlike anything you have ever experienced. Will you make it out alive?
the gentlemen @honeymoonjin
summary: Sick of unsatisfying hookups, boring relationships or the company of your own hand? Apply today for the chance to be on bangasm.com’s very first reality show! Seven attractive young gentlemen will be vying for your choice of who is best in bed. All from different backgrounds, these men claim they’ll be able to rock your world, so don’t hesitate! Apply now!
of storms and vampires @wishesunderthestars
summary: During the worst storm you have witnessed in your life, a bat crashes on your window. When you bring it inside your cottage to take care of it, you realize it isn’t simply a bat but a baby vampire. Your past has come back to haunt you because Jungkook’s sire is no one else but Min Yoongi, who you had left behind when you disappeared five years ago.
oh, little red @jincherie
summary: You knew they warned you about that path for a reason, you knew you shouldn’t take it as a shortcut. You knew, but you were running late, and you did it anyway. Oh, little red, just what have you gotten yourself into?
Ateez
Seonghwa
let me keep you warm @sweetestofchaos 💜
summary: “Are you cold?” “A little bit but I’ll be okay.” “Come here, let’s get you all warmed up.”
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cold- matt sturniolo x fem!reader
a/n: i’ve looked at my first fic so many times that i’m starting to hate it so i’m gonna try and change up my style a little bit!
summary- due to the freezing weather, the triplets have to stay with you until the weather lets up
warnings- smutttt🤷♀️ kinda longgg but i rly like a good build up so bare with me
i have known nick matt and chris for as long as i can remember. our parents were best friends all throughout highschool, so growing up we spent every second together. I have a single mother, who raised me and my twin brother nate, so she always said marylou was just another parent for us.
they were there for all my birthday parties, they were there when my parents fought, they were there when i broke my leg for the first time, my first crush, every first day of school, and so much more.
nick was my all time best friend, i told him every detail about my life. he knew every one of my secrets. he knew all of my crushes, all of my fears, he was there when i got my first period, i called him after i had sex for the first time, and he was there when i cried in his arms after getting my heart shattered for the first time.
nick was basically the male version of me, so it was no surprise to him when i told him i had a crush on his triplet brother, matt. “it was obvious when you asked him to teach you how to ride a bike instead of me” he said popping candy into his mouth “nick i was like 9” i laughed. “the truth always unfolds” he says in a singy-songy voice “plus you’re the only person who laughs at his stupid jokes”
nick was right, every time matt would tell a joke it was like everything in the world was so funny. it was always like that around matt. every time i saw him it was like i had no control over my actions. i was just as close with him as i was nick and chris, but it was just different.
i discovered i had feelings for matt the summer before 8th grade. we were all at that age where you’ve just hit puberty and everything changes. we were out by the pool hanging out like the 5 of us always did when matt suddenly came up behind me, picked me up, and jumped in the water. after i got back up he made sure i was okay before laughing at me, and i laughed with him. he looked me in the eyes and tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. my heart fluttered
matt had always been so sweet to me, but this summer it was different. we spent so much time together. we were attached at the hip for the rest of the summer. that was until school started back, and we didn’t have any classes together so we never had time to talk
one day a new kid came into my class and he was super cute. the teacher sat him in the empty desk next to me and we immediately hit it off. “hey i’m derek” he spoke as he sat down. “y/n!” i replied flashing him a sweet smile. we sat by eachother for the rest of the semester. one day he needed help with the work, so i gave him my number to talk to me after school. that night we stayed up on the phone for hours.
he finally asked me out on valentine’s day. i knew that deep down i still had feelings for matt, but i had to put them aside and focus fully on derek. we dated all the way from eighth grade to the middle of sophomore year. he broke up with me after the homecoming dance, and for a while i thought my world was going to end.
i left the dance early with nate and the triplets, and cried with them by my side for hours. once they went to bed, nick stayed in my room with me and i cried in his arms for hours. the next morning when i went down stairs, there was a basket of all my favorite candies, a blanket, and a card that read “i’m super sorry about the breakup. i love you so big and hope you get better soon. love, matt” i called matt and thanked him for the basket.
fast forward through sophomore and junior year, and now it’s winter break of our senior year. nick and i are still best friends, but me and matt aren’t nearly as close as we used to be. and just to clarify, winter in boston is terrible. it never gets above 20 degrees, and it occasionally gets higher than 10. right now, we were currently in the middle of a snow storm, so we were trapped inside. my days consisted of watching my favorite movies while occasionally being bothered by nate.
it was getting late, so i decided to get in the shower. i grab my usual sleep wear, a small tank top and whatever pajama shorts i have in my drawer. i was home alone, but about 20 minutes into my shower i hear ringing at my doorbell. i hurry up and get dried off and dressed, when the doorbell rings again. “coming!” i yell as i hurry down the steps
i open the door as i’m greeted by a strong gust of cold air, and my 3 favorite faces. “hey guys come in!” i said as i stepped out of the way “our pipes are entirely frozen until the ground defrosts, nate said we could stay here for a bit” nick said explaining the sudden visit. just as matt walked through the door, he leaned down close to my ear and whispered “you must be so cold in that outfit.” i looked down at ny chest, my nipples clearly hard from the cold air. fuck. i quickly ran upstairs to cover myself before coming back downstairs.
“nice hoodie” is all i hear then i look up to see matt staring at me. i look down to see the hoodie i was wearing. it was one matt gave me last winter when i didn’t have anything to wear one night at their house. i smile back at him and say “yeah i got it from this really weird kid on the side of the road once” “he must have good taste” he said matching my energy.
that was the thing about matt. i could go forever without talking to him and still feel like it had only been a day. as the three got settled on the couch. i grabbed blankets from my basket and distributed them. “aww no way you still have that!” chis said referring to my blanket. i looked at it and noticed it was the blanket matt gave me after my breakup. i know it’s old, but it’s always been my favorite blanket. i used it on every occasion, and it’s seen many tears.
as the movie started i couldn’t help but stare at matt when he wasn’t looking. the way the screen lit his face so perfectly in the dark light of the living room. then he opened up his phone and began typing. i few minutes later, i hear my phone go off.
matt: you seemed so cold earlier i’m glad my hoodie and blanket can keep you warm.
me: i’m glad too 😛🥶
matt: i almost forgot how good you looked in my hoodies.
me: matt what?
matt: you know how i feel about you.
just because you changed in 8th grade doesn’t mean i forgot about us.
i put my phone down and ran to my room. all it took was one text from matt and now i’m all hot and bothered. i sat on my bed trying to catch my breath. once i my hands stopped shaking so dramatically, i started typing up a text for nick.
before i could hit send, i heard footsteps coming up my stairs. “nick?” i said my voice obviously trembling. “sorry it’s just me” matt said entering my room. “look y/n i didn’t mean to scare you i jus-“ i cut him off my smashing my lips on to his. after a second i pulled back and immediately felt regret
“matt i’m sorry” i said “don’t apologize” before i had time to speak again he was kissing me hard. eventually the kissing turned into a very heated makeout. he sat down on the bed and i straddled him on his lap. both of us were clearly very needy. our teeth clashed and we groaned into each other’s mouths. i had my hands running through matt’s hair tugging on his brown curls.
he squeezed my ass and pulled me closer to him causing me to moan. i grinded on his lap steadily as we kissed eachother making him groan several times. his hands gripped my waist as my hands trailed up is shirt. i then ran my nails down his sides which caused matt to wince a little.
in one swift motion he let go of my waist and tugged my his hoodie off of my body, leaving me in the tiny tank top and shorts i was in earlier. “you must be freezing” he teased then stuck his hands down my top and cupped my bare breasts causing me to moan. matt saw that as ammunition and continued to massage my boobs.
“fuck matt don’t stop” i begged. i sounded so needy but i didn’t even mind. i had always wanted this moment with matt. he stopped and removed my top leaving my chest exposed. he then attached his mouth to my nipple, swirling his tongue around, then he moved to the other nipple and repeated those motions.
when he got up i ripped his shirt off then he attacked my neck leaving wet sloppy kisses. i dug my nails deep into the skin on his back which made him let out a slight whimper. he moved his hands down my body then he grabbed the waistband of my shorts. he looked at me in the eyes asking my for my permission.
“please matt” i whined almost a little too loud. he pulled my shorts down leaving me in just my panties. he lowered his head down to my waistline, leaving kisses all over. “fuck matt don’t tease” i whined. “just be patient, i’ve had to wait all my life for this” he demanded, his hoarse voice turning me on even more.
i rubbed my legs together hoping for some kind of friction. he gripped my thighs holding them still. he began to massage them as the continued to kiss my waist. the then made his way to my thighs kissing up til he reached my underwear.
he took them off tauntingly slow. the second they were off, he stuck his head between my legs and immediately latched his mouth onto my clit. i bit my lip hard trying to silence my moans. he sucked and licked and nibbled so well sending me into a euphoric state.
he started to finger me with one finger while he ate me out. my back arched so high off the bed i thought i could snap. my stomach tightened and i moaned his name “matt i’m bouta cum don’t stop! pls don’t stop!” all he did was hum, sending vibrations all up my body causing me to release.
he sat up with a corny smile on his face and looked me in the eyes. he grabbed my waist and quickly flipped me onto my stomach causing me to gasp. he lifted me so my ass was in the air “how do you wanna go about this?” he asked.
“fuck me like you mean it” i demanded, needing him right then and there. with that being said he removed his pants and his boxers in a flash, exposing his inches. i winced at the size, but i didn’t let it get to me.
“if you need me to stop just say ‘pink’ okay? it’ll be our safe word” he said. i nodded my head frantically becoming impatient.
suddenly he rammed into me at full speed causing me to almost scream, disregarding the people downstairs. he shoved my head into the pillow muffling my noises as he rammed ruthlessly into me.
this was a completely different side of matt. normally he was so sweet and gentle, but right now he was tearing me apart. not that i’m complaining. he thrusted into me with so much power i swore i could feel him up in my chest.
i screamed into the pillow and arched my back upwards causing him to get a better angle, hitting my g spot repeatedly. “fuck y/n you feel so good” he moaned. my legs shook once again. i clenched around matt causing his jaw to fall open as we both came. he fucked me through our highs never losing pace.
“remeber if you wanna stop now the word is pink” he said signaling he wasn’t ready to stop, but i wasn’t either. no matter how overstimulated i was becoming, i just couldn’t get enough. “please don’t stop matt” i begged.
he flipped me on my back where he can look me into my eyes and fucked into me slowly this time taking in every detail of my face. i had tears running down my eyes, my hair was a mess, and i couldn’t control the muscles in my face. i was an absolute mess under him but i didn’t mind at all.
he thrusted into me slowly as he dropped his head in the crook of my neck. “fuckkk. just like that. oh my g-god you feel amazing. i could do this forever.” he whispered praises in my ear sending me over the edge. i bit down on my swollen lip, causing it to bleed just a little as i released.
matt smirked as he pulled out and released thick white strings of cum all over my chest. he then licked it completely clean and smiled at me. “god you’re so beautiful, i’ve wanted you to be all mine forever” he said looking in your eyes.
“god matt i’ve loved you since we were 14” i admitted. he smiled at me and kissed me sweetly “ i knew you would be mine the second i laid eyes on you” he said “matt we were infants.” i joked “that’s besides the point, y/n. be my girlfriend?” he asked. “of course dummy” i kissed him.
kissing matt was so addictive. i just couldn’t stop once i started. “okay now let’s get you cleaned up and get to bed i’m so tired” he said standing up. he then picked me up bridal style and carried me into the shower.
•••••••••••••••••••••••••
AHHH THE ENDD I HOPE YALL LIKE BC I LOVED WRITING ITTTT
#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo smut#matthew sturniolo#matthew sturniolo smut#sturniolo smut#smut#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo
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Neteyam x Reader story
Sooo, I haven't written anything in genuine years. But after watching Avatar:TWOW I've become hyperfixated and have been scrolling and refreshing the Neteyam x Reader tag basically since the movie came out. As a consequence I've had this idea in the back of my mind that I thought was very sweet and cute (something we all need after that movie) so I decided to sit down and give it a go and see what comes out of my brain. So here it is. I haven't properly edited it and it's pretty much a 1000 words of word vomit and a bunch of time skips but it made me happy to write so I'm sharing it.
Oh, BTW SPOILERS!! but also I don't stick to the event's of the movie so idk I'm just putting it out there in case someone hasn't watched the trailer.
So the idea is our girl meets Neteyam informally for the first time when they're 9. She gets cornered in the jungle by a Palulukan and Neteyam helps her run away from it. She had always known who he is being the firstborn son of the Toruk Makto. She remembers her mom telling her about the big ceremony the Tribe had when he was first born. Everyone knew him.
- You shouldn't go into Palulukan territory without being careful - he says, looking a bit unsure about her now that there's no imminent danger.
- I didn't know I was in its territory
- Don't wander off too far on your own then.
___________________________
After this meeting, you get closer and become friends, which means as a consequence you occasionally hang out with the rest of Neteyam's family. However, as he gets older and his Dad starts preparing him to be a warrior and later on Lo'ak as well you don't have as much time to spend as you once did laughing and roaming around in the jungle exploring thick forests and shallow pools of water. It's not like you have nothing to do with your life, you do! You've been thinking of taking up lessons from the Tsahik, to see how you can use the spirit of Eywa and nature to help people who are hurting. It just so happens that the Tsahik is Neteyam's grandmother so you sometimes end up seeing him come back from a mission with his father and you share sweet smiles from across the camp.
When the tribe moves to the floating rocks, you are required by the Tsahik to help those injured from the journey and the ones getting used to the new terrain. So you're even more often in the same circles. As you're working one day about to go over to help Ninat with her sprained ankle, someone taps you on the shoulder
-You seem busy with work. - says Neteyam smiling sweetly at you
-Oh! Yes, I was just about to start. How's your training going?
You hadn't spoken in a while, just a quick wave or nod when crossing paths throughout the day. You hadn't noticed but he towers over you by a couple inches now. He nods towards his dad who's speaking with Neytiri at the edge of their tent.
-You know, just the usual responsibilities of carrying on the legacy. - His eyes gaze into you softly, like he's memorizing your face after not seeing it for long. He shakes it off and looks down - Have you got many tasks today?
-Not too much actually, just need to check up on Ninat and prepare some medicinal salves.
- I want to see you later – He looks back up into your eyes and smiles – Maybe we can go on one of our expeditions like before.
You chuckle – Sure, I'd love that.
With a final nod of approval, he stalks away to his parent's side.
When you meet later towards sunset he's waiting patiently with his Ikran by the vines connecting the Hallelujah Mountains to the Jungle below.
-We won't go too far out into the jungle so we have time to come back before sunrise. - He says as he connects his Queue with the Ikran and gazes at you expectantly – Hop on.
Can I trust that I'll come back alive from this flight? - you raise a skeptical eyebrow. He only went through his Iknimaya ritual not too long ago.
He reaches out a hand to help you up onto the animal – I don't think Eywa would forgive me if I wasted you on a simple flight.
You smile warmly into his shoulder as you hold tight onto him feeling the powerful animal shift under you as you fly out.
Roughly 10 years later
____________________________
When he comes back from the Mitkayina islands. He's taller and broader and his hair is much longer pulled into a loose braid around his Queue. You have a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach when you first see him. He's magnificent and commanding in his presence. The tribe has gathered all around to accept him and Jake back with a warm welcome. And even though you're hidden by your fellow Na'vi, his eyes immediately find you in the crowd and issue an eager and warm smile on his face.
As soon as he has settled the greetings with the current Olo'eyktan and the Tsahik, he finds you – walking to your sleeping pod. You would have gone to say hello and see him up close but, honestly, you were a bit intimidated. What you now knew was a childhood infatuation with him all those years ago still couldn't handle seeing him all of a sudden in all his... perfect glory. You were a little intimidated. But that doesn't stop him from reaching out for you. You see him jog over with a grin. He grabs you by the shoulders about to pull you into a hug but stops himself at the last moment. His eyes roam you over from head to toe and he looks up with glistening eyes -You've grown! - His tone sounds almost unbelieving
-That tends to happen as time passes, yes – you chuckle, hands coming up to hold onto his arms. His strong arms.
-I'm not too sure what I expected you to look like but you're... way beyond any expectation – He sounds so awe-struck as he's still taking you in, that you start to feel a little embarrassed.
-I can say the exact same thing – You say as you meet his gaze again. As you do his face softens and he brings you into his arms finally.
-I missed you, my friend.
Your hand caresses his hair gently – I missed you too.
You break apart and you decide to go for some late food with him abandoning your plans of sleep.
_______________________
Months later, when they have their first kiss. It's a slow thing. He will say something dry-humoured in his soft voice and she'll forget to laugh too busy staring at him, realizing how in love she is. And has been all these years. And when he notices that she hasn't replied he'll look at her and know immediately. That she's realized, at last. And he'll come to hold her like she's the most precious thing in his world. He'll thread his fingers through her hair bringing her face close to his. Forehead pressed to hers, patiently waiting for her to join him in the reality he has been living. Where they have loved each other for a while, longed and missed unbelievably because of it, and are finally able to bask in it. The warm smiles and looks, the casual closeness that not being apart allows. The things he has been dreaming of. He looks at her lips and back at her eyes, pulling back slightly to give her some space. Maybe she's not entirely understanding his feelings, maybe she's too caught up in her own to recognize his signs, he thinks, ready to give her all the time- When she grabs his neck and drags him back to her. - Neteyam... – her eyes are glossy like she's about to cry. So he caresses her cheeks gently and finally presses their lips sweetly together. And he can not compare it to any other feeling he has ever experienced. It's not like loving her, that's easy and at the same time overwhelming. It has brought him to the point that he is ready to lay down his life and all of his family's expectations to travel back to the tribe just to see her. To be reunited. But this feeling, this kiss is like knowing, that he won't be alone in his love and he can give her his all, his soul. They stay there, lost in the sweetness of being together like never before until the sun has long set and the moon has long risen.
_______________________
That is it! I do realise I keep skipping between tenses, I apologise if anyone finds it annoying and hope you enjoyed!
Edit: I thought it might be useful to put a link to part 2 down here so: Next
#avatar#avatar the way of water#neteyam x reader#avatar 2#reader insert#x reader#female reader#neteyam#jake sully#neteyam x omaticaya!reader
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Top 5 BL KISSES of 2023!
You’re so cool! Love you! 😘
💋
Love this question, but I tend to be really really in love with the like smaller kisses in shows some times cause of the #tenderness and #domesticity, but since there are so many good kisses and you think I'm cool, I'll give you 5 big and 5 small kisses 😘
5 Big Kisses
The Ultimate Winner- Yai and Jom, I Feel You Linger in the Air, Ep 7
What a phenomenal way to break the tension. Bright and Nonkul cycled through so many emotions in this entire scene fleeing the party, and I remember how well done this kiss was not only for the kiss itself but because everyone I knew was tense as hell seeing these boys kissing out in the open where anyone might see them.
Ray and Sand, Only Friends, Ep 2
Again, love or hate Only Friends does not matter to me, but I was absolutely obsessed with this kiss for quite awhile because I love the visual metaphor of things heating up between Sand and Ray by having smoke pour out of their mouths around the kiss. Like they were literally smoking hot, and I thought that was cool as fuck.
Yamato and Kakeru, I Can't Reach You, Ep 8
So many chances to lock lips, so many interruptions, and finally, fucking FINALLY that curtain came around both of them and the possible interruptions didn't matter any more. If you are going to save any kissing until the very last episode, this is how it should be done.
Lom and Nuea, Wedding Plan, Ep 6
I'm just going to leave this here. I really loved their sex scene in this episode. The Me Mind Y boys have some killer sex scene game.
King and Uea, Bed Friend, Ep. 9
gif by @gunsatthaphan
There are a near infinite number of KingUea kisses that I love with my entire being, but I think what takes the cake for me with this kiss in the bathroom in Episode 9 is the teasing, begging, and nuzzling. Like it just feels so familiar, domestic, and still full of desire and I appreciate that these boys getting together did not decrease their sex drive over time like a lot of BLs tend to do.
5 Small Kisses
King and Uea, Bed Friend, Ep. 4, 6, & 9
gif by @gunsatthaphan
I love boys that simp for their boyfriends, and though King and Uea are not officially boyfriends yet, these little moments, the little kisses and stuff really make King's interest in Uea feel real, and it's cute as fuck. I also love that Uea mirrors this kiss near the end of the show.
I also love the forehead kiss that Uea gives King during the pet play scene in Episode 6. I don't know why but it just feels almost sacred in a way, similarly to the Ep 4 kiss, the smaller quick kisses feel like something beyond just a casual hook up or friends with benefits situation. Now, we should know King has been interested in Uea for year, but he really starts leaning in to that around the time that I'm pretty sure Uea's feelings for King really start to solidify, and coming out of that pet play scene, these two are ready to be boyfriends. So I just love that little moment
And Ep 9 I love the forehead kiss that King plants on Uea after his stepfather is arrested. I just love Uea resting his head on King's shoulder, and King running his thumb across Uea's knee to comfort him, it feels domestic.
Han Baram and Im Han Tae, Sing My Crush, Ep.
gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul
IM HAN TAE DOES NOT EVEN REALIZE THAT HE HAS ROMANTIC FEELINGS FOR HAN BARAM HERE. IM HAN TAE IS FULLY JUST ACCIDENTALLY TORTURING THIS POOR, SAD GAY BOY! But I love this kiss so much, it's so sweet, it's so much fun, and you know what Han Baram deserves little kisses like this.
Phaya and Tharn, The Sign, Ep. 3
gif by @crispywizardtale
These two are so obsessed with each other it's disgusting. It's also the first real kiss they've had in 5 episodes and I found it very fun and sweet. Phaya said "oh you seem to be struggling to actually tell me you like me, let's kiss about it" and honestly, love that for him.
Tinn and Charn, Laws of Attraction, Ep 7
gif by @spicyvampire
Okay so this is technically not a kiss, but it is one of my favorite TinnCharn moments so I am counting it. Thank you for older gays, and also thank you for having fun and being playful with each other after sex. I love when people do stupid shit like this, and Tinn is just the biggest loser and he deserves to bite Charn as a little treat.
Shin Ki Tae and Lee Wan, Our Dating Sim, Ep 6
gif by @hanjiwoos
THE GIGGLES
THE GIGGLES HE GIGGLED
This scene was so sweet and I really really need to rewatch this show.
ASK ME MY TOP 5 OF ANYTHING BL 2023
#best of bl 2023#ask game#i feel you linger in the air#ifylita#only friends the series#i can't reach you#wedding plan the series#bed friend#sing my crush#the sign the series#laws of attraction#our dating sim
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It’s the little things 🤍
This is part 9!!
Catch up HERE!! :)
I just want to reiterate that although most of my work isn’t coherently inappropriate I do recommend you be 18+ to interact with my blog/read content I put MDNI warnings on. I do not wish to offend anybody nor make any uncomfortable with my work, so I apologize if I have.
Warnings: cursing, angst, a mental breakdown, some fluff in the end, mentions of being in the hospital, mentions of mental health/SA
LMK if i missed any!
Taglist: @gaymistakeboi @batw3nch @thedevillovesflowers @almightywdm @ghostslittlegf @sketchyfandomgirl @under-the-dirt @clear-your-mind-and-dream @darkangel4121 @vreselia @llemes @stargaliz @rockcollector3000 @nottrosax @azu21 @kaoyamamegami @vicktorfan @ghost-is-my-bbg
(i still don’t understand taglists so i’m so sorry if it didn’t work always just yell at me and i’ll do my best to fix it!! )
Enjoy friends!! :)))
Your eyes opened and you stretched, feeling the wrinkles in your bedsheets. Wait- your bedsheets…they weren’t this soft? Sitting up, you realized you were in Simon’s room.
Quickly, panic set in as you frantically looked around for him, cooing his name, hoping he was just hiding and playing a trick on you.
But one question still loomed in the back of your head: how the hell did you end up here?! “Yeah? You okay?”
You felt your breath catch in your throat. That voice…it was…”Simon?” Slowly turning, you were met with your Simon. He was leaning against the doorframe of his bathroom in his famous sweatpants, the steam from the shower still fresh on his chest. The crushing feeling in your chest was numbing, your ears ringing. “Is it really you?”
“Of course it is? What’re you on about?” He chuckled a little as he adjusted his posture.
Quickly you realized he must not remember anything. “Yeah, I’m sorry. I had a weird dream.” You laughed it off as you took the sight of him in again.
Drinking in his presence, you felt tears prick your eyes. “Oh hey, darling no.” He quickly approached you as he saw the glisten in your eyes begin to form. His arms swooped around you as he pulled you into him. “Shh…whatever dream you had wasn’t real. I’m here, you’re okay.” His voice was soothing and gentle, a tone saved only for you.
“I know, I’m sorry.” You wiped your tears and couldn’t help but laugh at yourself. “It was a stupid dream.”
“Whatever it was, is gone. And don’t apologize to me, we’ve been over this. You don’t have to be afraid to feel your emotions, this is a safe space doll.” Simon walked to go grab some clothes, throwing them to you. “Throw these on and we can go meet Johnny for training.”
JOHNNY!
Dropping the clothes to the floor, you make a break for the door, needing to be sure that all of the boys were back to themselves. Oh your Johnny, you needed him right now.
Your hand landed on the doorknob and it wouldn’t turn. “How do you unlock this Simon? Is your door broken?”
Looking up, Simon was now gone, nowhere to be found and nowhere he could’ve went. “No…Simon?!” Your voice echoed. “Nonononono….”
Trying the door again, it still wouldn’t budge. You felt yourself collapse to the ground, defeated.
A gasp left your mouth as you woke up and sat up quickly. It was all a dream… You slammed back down into your pillows as you ran your hands over your face. “Fuck!” It came out louder than you thought, resulting in you to sit right back up and look over at the little playpen that held Simon.
He grunted at you, almost to say ‘watch your language’. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up honey.”
Walking over, you pick him and bring him back to your bed to snuggle with you, the only form of comfort you both have right now.
Simon was your sword, always ready to protect you with such a feral and vicious tactic. He swore to you years ago that he’d do whatever it took to keep you safe, always ready to go to bat for you.
The other side to Simon was soft and tender, always gentle with you when you were fragile, handling you with caution and care. But that came with a sharper side than his protective nature. That tenderness was only behind closed doors. As soon as you were in the eyes of your coworkers, he wasn’t one to step up to give you that affection you craved from him.
Hence, he was a double edged sword.
But you were always willing to feel the rath in order to get the soul that was deep inside of him. Simon was always there for you, even in the darkest of times. There were many nights that you’d spent in his room, the only reason being you both needed the company.
You both found refuge in the other. Simon gave you a safe place, a shoulder to cry on. He gave you the love and support you needed from your team. Simon knew well how Price treated you and when he failed to pick you up, Simon stepped up to help put the pieces back together of a person he didn’t break.
Simon was well aware that a Captain should be someone their soldiers find safety in, solice in. Captains are meant to not only push, but also help their soldiers. They are not meant to degrade them and make them crumble, leaving someone else to pick up the mess. You couldn’t find comfort in the man you were supposed to receive it from, so Simon made it his life’s mission to fill that void.
Your knuckles rapped on the door. It was nearly 4 am, and you had only been home a week since your last mission and someone you’d ended up at Room 256 every night since your feet landed on base.
Simon answered the door, his mask on. “It’s you.” He sighs in relief. “Get in here, you’ll freeze in that.”
You were in shorts and a compression shirt, the only clean clothes you owned at the moment. This mission had caused you to fall into a deep depression, and Simon knew the reason all too well, he saw the papers. When you told him, his heart broke twice as much as when he read it, and it felt like he was finding out for the first time all over again.
“Here, please.” Simon removed his mask and threw you a hoodie all too large for you. “Please…” He was begging you to take care of yourself despite what happened.
Throwing the hoodie over your dishelved frame, you looked at him and held your arms out. “Happy?”
“No. I’m not.” Your joke had gone serious now. “I can’t keep watching you do this to yourself. What happened in Dubai is horrible, and I won’t stop until you get justice, but please.” His voice was quiet on the ‘please’. “I am begging you. You have to take care of yourself. I can’t stand to watch you sit alone and pick at your food during dinners. I can’t let you go another day in training without water. It’s breaking me to see you turn into a shell of the girl I love.”
Somewhere in that, his hands had ended up on your arms, holding them. “If not for yourself, for me. I need you here Y/N. If you leave me, I won’t know what to do.”
You began to cry softly at his words and he quickly began to shush you, bringing you into his chest. “No man will ever touch you like that again. I promise.”
He promised.
And yet here you were laying in a hospital bed recovering from wounds a man inflicted. Looking down at Simon, he was staring up at you with teary eyes. He pointed to his blocks, and you groaned as you reached to your side table to grab them.
Sitting him down in front of you, you sprawled the blocks out on the bed. “Go ahead Si.”
He sniffled a little as he grabbed an ‘S’. “You?”
He grunts. “What about you honey?” He lets out a little cry and it breaks your heart. It seems as if he’s having a hard time with this, even at his little age. “It’s okay, you don’t have-“
A little ‘b’ and little ‘p’ land in your lap as he puts his hands on your knee. “Si, it’s not your fault.” He grunts at you. “You didn’t break your promise. There wasn’t anything you could do.” He takes the blocks from you and hands you a heart block, and the ‘S’ block. “I know you’re sorry, but it’s not your fault. It’s mine.” He grunts, handing you a ‘P’ block. “Price?”
He grunts. “It’s his fault? How?” Simon lets out another little cry and you fight the urge to pick him up and shush him. His eyes scan the little letters as he picks up the letter ‘t’. “Tia? She doesn’t have anything to do with what Snyder did.”
Simon sighs and hands you an ‘e’. “E?” You look at him confused. “I’m going to need more.” You watch hun search around until he hands you an ‘l’. “LE? Left early? I know he did.”
He grunts, putting his little hands on the ‘P’ and ‘t’ blocks. “He left early because of her? Did something happen with you boys?”
He grunts and you set the blocks he gave you down. He hands you a little ‘S’. “You?” Silence. “Soap?” He grunts.
“What happened to Johnny?” Panic settled into your bones, your mind racing through possibilities.
Simon hands you three numbered blocks: 3,7,2. “Is this a room number?”
Simon grunts. Running through possibilities, you knew it wasn’t his barracks room. “Is it a hotel?” Nothing. “Apartment?” Nothing.
“Simon…what happened?” Simon hands you an ‘H’.
“House?” Silence. “Oh God…no. Is it a hospital room?!
Simon grunts, and when he does, your whole world begins to spin. You didn’t even hear Laswell come in. She enters the room and Simon turns and begins to crawl to her, making little worried babbles. “Hey, what’s going on?” She swoops him up and comes to sit by you. “Y/N, look at me. You’re okay, what’s going on?”
Your eyes meet and the words leave your lips too fast. “We need to go to room 372. Now. Please!”
Laswell looks at you like you’re crazy, until Simon hands her the ‘S’ block. “It’s Johnny.” You cry. She sighs and looks at you.
“I can go check with the-“
“No! We need to go now! I need to make sure my boy is okay.” You we’re frantic to see Johnny and make sure he was alive and well. If the room was empty or filled with another patient, you could rest. “Please…”
Laswell eventually gave in and took Simon on her hip, her other arm wrapped up in yours to help give you some walking support.
You both made your way to the third floor and followed the signs to Room 372. Turning the corner, you asked Laswell to let you go alone, and she reluctantly stayed a few doors down. When you began to enter the doorframe, you saw Price and your heart dropped.
His arms were wrapped around Tia. One was around her waist, the other underneath her chin leading her into a kiss. “The fuck?!”
The both snapped to attention at the sound of your voice and you watched Price’s eyes widen in fear at the sight of you. “What’re you doing here?” His breathing quickened as he saw you hooked up to a rolling IV and in a hospital gown. “What happened?! You’re not supposed to be home until tomorrow. I-“
“Enough. What the fuck is going on here?” Your voice was firm, trying to hold back the tears that burnt your ducts, begging to break free.
“It’s not what it looks like, I promise.” Tia spoke up and you looked at her appalled. “Please let me explain-“
“No! What else could this be except that you were cheating?” Your eyes met Price’s again and his were filled with horror, fear, heartbreak, and sadness. “To think I trusted you.”
Before you were about to go walk away, a whine hit your ears and you looked back over your shoulder to see Johnny on the hospital bed with Gaz. Johnny had a little oxygen tube in his nose. Gaz was mindlessly playing with airplanes. Your eyes widened, Simon was right. “What is he doing here?!” You walked over to the bed, limping and barely moving.
Price reached out to help you but you shoved him off of you. “What happened to you?” You brushed your hand over his head, shushing his crying. He was trying to grab at you, seemingly wanting to come with you.
“He’s about to get discharged, he had a weird episode in his sleep and stopped breathing. Tia rushed him here and called me. I-“
“That’s enough.” I sigh as I look to Tia. “As mad as I am at you, thank you.”
She shyly smiles, chewing on her bottom lip. “I didn’t know what else to do.”
“Did you put him under an alias?” I ask.
She nods. “Kian Price, John’s nephew. Just like you told me to.”
You were livid with her right now, barely able to look at her. “You did good.” You say. “Can he come with me?”
“No, he has to be under supervision. They said he has some sort of sleeping disorder that causes babies to hold their breath in their sleep when stressed. In your state-“
“In my state?!” You stumble to your feet. “I’m perfectly capable to take care of him. At least I didn’t forget a kid!”
Price looked at you confused. “You really don’t know?” You scoffed. “You left Simon in your room. Laswell found him with a pink bra on his face.” His face dropped.
“I can explain. Tia and I were in such a rush and got busy and distracted and-“
“I don’t wanna hear it Price.” The use of his last name made his eyes go wide. “Once I’m discharged, we’re figuring out custody of these boys and we’re not speaking again.”
“Y/N-“ He tried to grab onto you, but you pulled away, causing you to knock into Tia as you both tumbled to the floor. You cried out in pain as Laswell came bounding around the corner.
You watched in slow motion as Price reached for Tia, picking her up and holding her to ask if she was okay. Laswell helped you to your feet, calling for a nurse. Your eyes couldn’t leave the sight in front of you.
The way their eyes met, the way they held each other.
His gaze didn’t even spare you a passing glance.
Laswell and a nurse began to walk you back to your room as you watched Price and Tia dissapear from your line of sight.
No sound was hitting your ears, time moved in slow motion as the weight of the situation fell on you.
The next few days were a blur, you had been discharged and told to attend physical therapy to regain your strength. You were sitting in your room alone, staring at the empty space where the playpen used to sit. Price had Soap and Gaz still and Laswell had taken Simon to let you heal, but little did she know Simon would help you heal.
You had been alone for almost a week, not even leaving the confines of your walls. You didn’t dare to run the risk of running into anyone. You’d perfer to be a hermit.
Therapy had called you multiple times wondering why you weren’t there and stressed the importance of attendance, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.
You really couldn’t do much of anything. In such a state of heartbreak that you couldn’t even move from your place on the floor leaned against the foot of your bed.
You had lost everything, your boys, the love of your life, even Laswell has yet to talk to you since your discharge. For the first time since you joined this team, you were on your own…and you were failing yourself.
You’d always had someone to help you, stand by your side during hard times. Not this time, it was all you and you didn’t know what to do.
Without Simon’s comforting arms or Johnny’s smile. Without Simon’s soothing voice, ears empty of Johnny’s laugh. Lacking the strength of your sword and shield.
You remembered the day they found out about the incident in Dubai, the man who had assaulted you.
Simon, Johnny and yourself were all hanging out in the common area when Johnny surprised you and jumped you, planting himself over you as he played his usually prank on you and tickled you. He knew how much you hated it and loved to watch you squirm under him as you laughed.
This time, you screamed, you froze and stared up at him in fear. He immediately held his hands up and froze himself.
It didn’t take long for you to bolt to your room, locking the door behind you.
The two men were close on your heels as the softly knocked on the door, quietly begging you to let them in, not only to your room but your head.
“Tell us what happened out there Y/N, please.” Johnny begged you through the door, worried about you.
Simon coaxed you into opening up and they stepped into your room, Simon shutting the door slowly as to not spook you. “Hey doll, you okay?”
As soon as ‘doll’ fell from Simon’s mouth, you spilled. The words were flying through your lips before you could even comprehend what you were saying.
Every little detail of what had happened hit their ears. Simon knew from the papers hitting his desk, but he felt his heart break twice as hard hearing it from you.
The way your eyes shrunched or you looked at the ceiling to prevent tears from falling. He noticed your expressions and body language and he realized just how much damage this had caused. The papers he read didn’t do you justice, downplaying the situation tenfold.
As soon as you finished, you took in a big breath and began to sob as the flood gates broke open. Johnny was the first to swoop you into his arms and began swearing up and down that he’ll kill anyone that even thinks about touching you like that. He swore to be your shield, to protect you from any harms the world may threaten you with. “You let me take the pain okay? You let me handle the problem, you let me hurt.”
Simon swore to be your sword, vowing to stop anything before it can hit you. He’ll fight for you and always be right by your side. While Johnny would deflect any dangers that come to you, Simon would kill them off before you would notice the imminent threat. “I will always be here for you, always be in your side and fight not only for you but with you. If anyone’s giving you a hard time, send them to me. I will forever swear to protect you and help you trudge through the waters when they get rocky.”
Since that day, they were like guard dogs. They never let you be alone. You all spent more time in the others rooms than your own rooms. Simon would be quick on the jump to defend you in even the littlest situations, and Johnny was always there when you needed him in and out of the field. He’d cover you in enemy fire so you could get out before him, or he’d pull you away when Price came into a room to avoid a fight between you two.
Now here you are, needing them more than ever and you can’t have their comfort.
You lift your head from your knees as you hear your door creak open slightly. A little grunt enters the air, the door openly a little more. You had cursed yourself for not shutting it all the way, or locking it.
A little Simon crawls into your view, plopping onto his butt as soon as he gets past the doorframe. He stares at you and doesn’t move or make any noise, almost letting you come to him when you were ready.
And you did. You leaned forward to pick him up and held him close to you. His head fell into the crook of your neck and his little arms tried to wrap around you.
You squeezed him tight, but safely as to not hurt his little frame. He let out a deep breath, as if he felt relieved to finally be here for you.
After a couple minutes, you expected Laswell to follow by the thuds coming down the hall towards your room, but they became erratic, followed by giggles and excited babbles.
You stood up and opened your door to peak into the hallway to see a dopey smiling Soap. He huffed excitedly and noisily crawled over to your feet, sitting down and making grabby hands at you.
You picked him up and placed him on your other hip, taking both boys back into your room and sitting on your bed.
They both laid on your chest as you slightly leaned back. Simon was nuzzled into your shoulder like before, and Soap was sitting up by your hip babbling at you like he was telling you a story.
You gave him little “yeah?” “really??” “no she didn’t!” and other comments to keep him going. He got so excited when you reacted, his little arms flailing or his baby talk getting louder, or he’d breath quickly in excitement.
You three sat like that for a better part of 2 hours before you finally laid back and fell asleep.
What you didn’t see was Johnny crawl up to you when he noticed your eyes close and cozy up to your side and drift off himself.
It amazed you that even as babies, your boys came to you. They’re natural instinct telling them you needed their comfort, their help.
Although it didn’t bring the same feeling as when they’re adults, you couldn’t help but feel some warmth begin to radiate inside of you having them to help you heal emotionally and physically.
And you couldn’t be more grateful for that.
#captain price x reader#modern warefare 2 x reader#simon ghost riley#soap mactavish smut#soap mactavish x reader#tf141 x reader#cod mw2#johnny mactavish#john price#kyle gaz garrick
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#RainbowRoad for Rainbow Railroad Charity Drive
CLICK HERE TO PREORDER
Hello, everyone!
As you may know, a couple of years ago I wrote a Good Omens fic called Sit Tight, Take Hold. It kicked off an amazing friendship with a group of people who have now come together to organize a fundraiser to support an LGBTQ+ non-profit.
I'm really excited to announce that we are running a charity drive to support Rainbow Railroad alongside the release Good Omens Season 2 and the third and final part of the #rainbowroad series, Fools Rush In.
What is Rainbow Railroad?
Rainbow Railroad is a non-profit organization that works to relocate at-risk LGBTQ+ individuals to safety globally.
"As a result of Rainbow Railroad, more LGBTQI+ individuals can access lives free from persecution, and ultimately, we envision a world where LGBTQI+ people can live lives of their choosing, free from persecution."
If you've read STTH and AALS, you may remember that Formula 1 visits a multitude of countries that have poor human rights and are unfriendly to LGBTQ+ individuals. I vacillated between many charity organizations before settling on this one, which encompasses the global nature of the #rainbowroad universe and some of the challenges the characters face. Thank you, @kookaburra-laugh, for suggesting this charity!
Great! How can I help?
@dustandhalos, @blairamok, and @cinnabarmint are releasing prints of their art for #rainbowroad on Etsy. Art options include:
a. A 5x7 postcard pack of 6 prints featured in STTH!
b. An 12x18 poster of Crowley's C8ZR1 from part two, Accept A Little Spin
c. And last but not least, an 18x24 print of Ezira's signed Anthony Fucking Crowley poster.
[Preview images are protected with anti-AI cloaking technology Glaze, and may depict slight pixelation and/or distortion. Printed art will not depict this distortion.]
BUT THAT'S NOT ALL. WE ARE PRINTING SIT TIGHT, TAKE HOLD. Thank you, again, to @blairamok, who made the astounding cover art.
I will update everyone once I get the physical proof, but the book includes 428 pages incorporating the tumblr posts, news articles, and text messages. The dimensions will be 6x9x1, printed in color on 80lb matte paper.
How does this work?
CLICK HERE TO PREORDER
Preorders open TODAY and will run for a month until Friday 9/1. Once preorders close, we will submit the orders to the various printers. All proceeds will go to Rainbow Railroad, minus the cost of printing and shipping orders. We hope to start shipping out merch mid to late-September. Depending on how many orders we get will depend on how quickly we can ship everything out, but we will keep you posted once preorders close.
Hopefully, if you order something and live in the US, it will arrive by the time Fools Rush In finishes posting on 10/13.🤞🤞🤞 We will be shipping internationally as well!
What if I can't afford to order anything?
That's okay! Please reblog this post so more people can see it. It will bring more attention to the charity drive and more attention to Rainbow Railroad!
What the heck is #rainbowroad?
#rainbowroad is a trilogy about our favorite Good Omens characters reimagined as Formula 1 drivers. I have no idea how this came into my head beyond binging Good Omens and Drive to Survive at the same time. The final part of the main trilogy, Fools Rush In, is currently posting and slated to end on 10/13. It is COMPLETE.
Thank you to my friends and all the readers who have made this possible! I am so excited to share this with you. Please reblog to boost awareness. If you have specific questions, shoot me an ask!
Massive thanks to @dustandhalos, @blairamok, @cinnabarmint, and @kookaburra-laugh for making this possible!
ni <3
#rainbowroad for rainbow railroad#charity drive#sit tight take hold#rainbow road#good omens fic#ni speaks
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