#i really am not sure what to do here
Text
It's so annoying just how right my dad can be, while still being incredibly wrong. Because, when talking about how he has to scan a QR code to petition the school to not have her classes end up as audits because she's missed x amount of days, he brought up how her grades were good in all of her classes. And we both agree that the QR thing is stupid when they don't also give a web address to do it on!(Not to mention that he got this paper today, the last day to do this). And he made a comment about how schools are just teaching us how to pass tests, how to be cogs in a machine. And he's right.
Like don't get me wrong, there are quite a few things that schools do well. But, for highschool, you have like 8 classes a day, with only one early release say where you then have like, 4. Not to mention homework, oh but if you want to do extracurriculars like soccer you have to have at least C's and no more than 6 tardies/absences that aren't excused by a doctor's note. Even though for a good half of the year you have to wake up before dawn to get to school on time(not mentioning 0 hour classes). And the other half the year you're waking up right as sunrise is starting. Which is kind of how it works at a lot of jobs.
And like, dad's right about that.
But he's also voting for a lot of the people who are the reason behind this.
He mentioned how they're taking history out of schools, and he's right, but he's voting for the people doing it.
And it's so fucking disheartening, because he can see what's wrong, he knows fundamentally what's wrong. But he doesn't seem to realize who is doing it.
And I'm not sure what to do about it either. Because he gets so irrationally angry and defensive of the people he's voting for, and I live with him because I don't have any other options. So sitting down with him and talking just isn't an option right now.
#glacier rambles#glacier vents#i really am not sure what to do here#this sucks#like he's got the problem he just doesn't seem to know anything else#if that makes sense#0 hour classes start at 6:30 am#1st hour starts at 7:20#(as far as i'm aware my sister doesn't have a 0 hour class)#(but i had just hit freshman year before covid and i was in marching band)#(and i was waking up at 3 am just to be able to get there)#i'm in college now and full time is 12 credit hours#which is usually about 3-4 classes#and every class i've seen is mon/wed or tues/thurs#and the occasional friday class#and i didn't really get a proper high school education because of covid and ended up getting my ged instead#but i know the hell i went through freshman year#and i see my sister struggling#and this can't be humane...
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
DIRECTOR'S NOTE • Nov. 2023
You can't go home. This play has a particular
care for and interest in its victims. The resident
inciting event is endless. tragedy is much more
concerned with footnotes than it is with gods.
well acquainted with what happens afterward,
storytellers claim they can't diverge from what's
written: resist. rage against what must be.
tell a story about war without talking
about love. survive its aftermath. fail
to find resolution. make this suffering
a home. There's no breaking this chain—
fate, as always, gets its way.
Poetry assembled from the program of an Oresteia production. Nov. 2023.
#p#analog#oscillating wildly between liking and hating this but you have to get the gunk out to get going again#the last line...the rest of the poem has to be REALLY solid for it to work and im. not sure it is. but its here lol#bad 'scan' quality too but i am too impatient to wait to get to a real scanner#what i do like about this one is the enjambment#i think its some of my best
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
In Stars and Disco
(Disco side of the swap)
#in stars and time#ISAT#Odile#Siffrin#Isabeau#Mirabelle#Bonnie#disco elysium#The origins of this crossover came from my playthrough journal in which I wrote down “I think Siffrin should play disco elysium”#Something about failing forwards in general - but some scenes would *shatter* them. Maybe in a good way.#I think they would get to the first dream and need a few months before picking it back up again.#I am not sure if the developer of ISAT has played dDisco Elysium but Odile & Siffrin as a duo have strong HBD & Kim vibes.#Which I am so here for. Accidently or purposefully - it scratches an itch I never thought I would get scratched again.#Both are really good games with gutpunching writing and I want to spread the word. I am doing my part!#Yeah I put Bonnie as Cuno. I know exactly what I'm doing.#Isa is Titus - hard to tell because I gave up on drawing the hat.#This AU in any form is really fun to write comics for so I will be back.#Thanks to all the ISAT fans who have been really friendly so far! Hello hello!
255 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Wait is that lore?" moments in Antoine's return stream
These ones are likely jokes, but (you can use it in your headcanons):
With Tubbo, explaining his absence by saying "I was dead, I think, but not anymore, I was tired of being dead"
"I couldn't explain to you, it's out of my understanding how I'm dressed. The human mind cannot comprehend how I'm dressed and so the human brain shows it that way, but it isn't exactly like that. It's not powerful, it's just weird"
"You know me well!" "Heh, I know you as if I made you!" *silence* (closest to maybe serious)
These ones are more serious:
He isn't romantically interested by Cucurucho, he just likes his ass (that totally a human is aro that's what I mean)
He really missed Pomme, he stopped coming because without her it wasn't interesting anymore (this one is just cute)
Very invested in knowing what happened to the eggs while they were away
Accidentally gave Pomme one of the books Ourson (I think it's this one?) gave him, immediately panicking when he realized. When Pomme asks what it was, he first tries to pretend not to understand, and is pretty serious when he tells her that it's nothing; he'll tell her about it one day, and it's his little secret garden, everyone should be allowed to have secrets, don't she think? she isn't against secrets, right?
Certain that the eggs went to some kind of other dimensions/got doubles?? I mean there was a theory inspired by Stranger Things but despite what Pomme is saying he's not letting go of the idea
After asking Pomme if she met dark Cucurucho and she talks about the Watcher: "Je crois pas qu'on parle de la même chose. Là tu me parles de l'oeil, et moi je pense que je te parle de quelque chose d'autre. Je pense que tu me parles du Watcher... là où moi je te parle d'autre chose." ("I think we're not talking about the same thing. Here you're talking about the eye, and me I think I'm talking about something else. I think you're talking about the Watcher... when me I talk about something else" again how does he know the name "Watcher".)
Knows that Maximus is dead, when all the other players seem to have decided to play the "don't know if he's alive or dead" card (bonus: Antoine and Pomme talking about telling Aypierre, and Pomme thinking she won't be able to find the right words "I don't think there are right words..." ok im sad now thanks). Since we're at it, when reading Pomme diary where she worries about Baghera and Antoine being dead, saying they can't be dead, he doesn't share that worry in the slightest, as if he knows Baghera's not dead (this one's dubious and I am very willing to put it as cc!Antoine not thinking rp)
He and Pomme are talking about what she remembers of the Watcher and honestly the whole conversation deserves to be clipped and transcribed. To go with him name dropping the Watcher, he is now only calling it the creature with one eye because that's how Pomme calls it
Pomme explains that the Watcher was observing her and Richas and there was a threatening aura to it, so they immediately fled. Antoine in a very serious voice "You were right to, you were right to, you were right to. Because I think it's this person who was at the origin of your disappearance."
#theres not really lore in his talk with Sunny but they're fun together#completely missed the whole 'you wanna be a star? you're gonna lose your privacy if you do that are you sure?' convo#also the way he's just 'btw have you met my CHILD Pomme? Yeah she's great' you fucking dad#i think antoine will be a sunny defender#him reuniting with Pomme <3#also its fun to rewatch. he's pressing buttons on a snowman decoration. i remember how he loved press the button.#it was foreshadowing.#pomme saying it took her one hour to draw something for Dapper and Antoine jumping to her defense#by saying Leonard de Vinci could take days to make something#qsmp#qsmp antoine#pomme admin must have been so happy for Antoine to be here her lore with her memory loss and what happened to the egg is finally played with#anyway with how antoine was also insistent to learn more about the watcher by questioning pomme#I am betting even more on Antoine knowing things about the Watcher
223 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Stop saying Crowley won't help Aziraphale in S3 he'd go back to him in a HEARTBEAT and nothing would stop him" I get it no one likes the idea of Crowley being bitter after what happened for a long period of time but like can we at least acknowledge that he's currently going through probably the most emotional pain in his life since falling? Can we agree that he's opened his heart entirely - something you couldn't pay him to do unless the world is literally ending and he's desperate - to Aziraphale, and got shot down? Can we understand that he did it AGAIN only to lose Aziraphale again? Not that what Aziraphale did isn't without Crowley's own shortcomings (hiding the truth of Heaven's cruelty from him) but like,,,,
The appeal here isn't Scorned Crowley Doesn't Love Aziraphale Anymore, or Never Wants To Help Him Again, the appeal here is Crowley learning enough self respect to not just walk back right to Aziraphale like nothing happened after Aziraphale has had a pattern of consistently refusing him. Going years ping-ponging between "We're not friends I don't even know him" to "That's what friends are for right?" and "We're friends, why would you even say anything?" and "Friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon!"
Like I get it, Crowley is a heartbreakingly forgiving person. Of course he's gonna forgive Aziraphale, I'll be surprised if he didn't forgive him by the time he walked out the bookshop door, but gdi he could at least grant himself the luxury of being at least a little irritated for longer than however long it takes to make a globe and some books float and angrily cry out to God in his flat. But due to the change of pace and dynamic that is establishing part of the conflict for Season 3, I just really like the idea of him for ONCE prioritizing himself and being like "Okay, fine. We'll get back at it when you're ready, then," instead of just taking Aziraphale back like his words and actions meant nothing to him, when clearly they have an effect on him.
What is Aziraphale going to learn if Crowley just accepts what he did so quickly, like he always has the entire time they've been friends? Idk maybe I'm just projecting too much darkness on their dynamic but I mean, if the pattern of Aziraphale pushing Crowley away/disrespecting him one day and then being fine with his friendship the next + Crowley never stopping to be like "Hey, that's not cool, at least give me a little credit" or smth was fine all along and will continue to be fine in the future, then why, after 6,000 years of being friends and loving this demon, can Aziraphale still not accept that Crowley is just fine the way he is, and instead got excited to promote him to an angel in a heartbeat once the opportunity presented itself? You can't blame all of it on Heaven when Aziraphale has demonstrated his free will/defiance to Heaven so many times. Or, I don't know, I guess maybe we can? Maybe I'm just craving too much angst to the point where I'm letting it cloud my analysis of canon. Idk.
#derpy speaks#good omens#good omens 2#no i dont think crowley is gonna ever hate aziraphale for what happened but he's allowed to be angry#he's allowed to be done with it all. he's allowed to be exhausted. just look at his face when he drives away.#meh. idk. but i dont know how i'll feel if crowley just INSTANTLY accepts aziraphale back in a situation involving#idk - ''hey help me stop the new apocalypse''#at least. without like. SOME pushback? it can even be something small like ''are you SURE you want ME to help you? do you really need me?''#doesnt have to be a straight refusal but i'd like SOME kind of action to show that crowley is putting his foot down for once#he deserves that self respect#do NOT reply saying that im insinuating that aziraphale is actively malicious or doing it on purpose.#everything he has done up until now is his own complicated response to all the trauma and guilt he's been through#but despite that crowley is STILL allowed to be upset... it's messy. i can write a whole paper about how this whole thing#is just unfortunate on both ends. again. we didnt get queerbaited we got communication baited 😭#but help me out here. am i just too fandom-brained to have these expectations from the story?#is there something obvious im missing that is making me sound like a complete asshole here? do i need to get my head out of the gutter?#someone please explain it to me if so because whatever it is‚ i can't find it#not queued
222 notes
·
View notes
Text
One day I’ll go through med school and then I’ll go through residency and then I’ll go through a fellowship and then I’ll be the most crybaby neurosurgeon you could think of. Bursting into tears if I so much as graze ur hypothalamus with my forceps
#Yesterday I shadowed a neurologist for the first time and basically we got done seeing a patient who’s also a heart surgeon#And I turned to the doctor and was like Ok what do we do#The thing is this patient has dementia and we don’t really have a cure for that yet so the study he’s enrolling in is largely observational#Still I expected her to follow up on him in much more frequent increments#Instead this woman goes “we’ll see him in 6-9 months but… not even sure if he’ll be here by then sooo”#Basically implying he might be dead in a year#AND I WAS LIKE. Blown away by how blase she was#And ever since then a fiendish sort of melancholy followed me everywhere I went .#Bc I haven’t stopped thinking about the heart surgeon#I don’t get how she can stop thinking about him#I don’t understand people who can stop thinking about something like that#I know neurologists like her have seen patients come and go many a time but I was disturbed#So I made a pact w myself never to lose my humanity. Half of why I’m so into medicine is bc of its humane aspects#And in 10 years I’ll look back at this and hopefully still be just as annoyingly sensitive as I am today#I think I’m just overall disillusioned w how little humanity some people seem to have but that doesn’t mean I have to be that way too#p
94 notes
·
View notes
Text
i love how fraught and complicated discourse around various utena characters ‘dying’ is when anthy is literally stabbed to death eternally by a million swords imbued with human hatred. and then utena gets stabbed to death by them also. like. ‘death’ is incredibly interesting in rgu because most of the time it’s this ambiguous figurative thing that has interesting implications re: ohtori as a closed-off world one can escape. we are all trapped in our coffins. mamiya is the only named character with a grave. nemuro memorial hall functions as one all the same. ruka is implied to have died in the hospital— was he dead all along? who was the boy we saw for these two episodes? is this dead boy the same boy, or is this just another coincidence from the shadow girls, cutting like a knife? it’s heavily implied that akio and anthy murder kanae by poisoning her, adding to the previous implication that they were poisoning mr ohtori too, but there are no perceptible consequences of this. kanae’s absence is not felt. she’s fed an apple slice. what happens to the bodies? we know what happened to the 100 boys, but what about everyone else? and so on and so forth. ‘death’ is a tricky thing in utena, i think it’s constantly functioning on figurative and literal levels in very different ways for very different purposes. dios died. dios was dying. dios didn’t die. he grew up. etc etc
#what am i trying to say here?#idk! think about all of the pieces you have#dying is complicated in ohtori in countless different ways#and i find it boring to see so much ‘this character is dead and that’s it’ stuff#when death is used farrrrrrr more figuratively than some ppl give credit for#and i think the movie too does wonderful things with death#and what ‘dying’ really means#being disbelieved. being forgotten. being rejected. haunting despite this#much more interesting to think about wrt commentary on abusive relationships than it is#to think about what?? oh me when my brother died but plot twist he’s alive and can walk on this road all cool. like?????#akio doesn’t have the power to make himself revenant#he THINKS he does and he absolutely has power when he’s alive and he imbues that power with such meaning that it does live on after him#but ANTHY. anthy is the one struggling with herself and her feelings and the impact of trauma and abuse (that power!!) in aou#he’s dead? he died? she brought him back through her memories? or she’s left him (metaphorical death) and he’s haunting her??#all such interesting interpretations#i haven’t mentioned touga bc i don’t have the energy today. if dead and just illusion of others memories then why active. why awful#like in aou akio is only Obviously scummy when he’s alive. his illusory self is based upon anthy’s love for him#if anime!touga is nothing more than nanami/whoever’s memories of him before he died……. why does he actively choose to suck again and again#like nanami wouldn’t do that. unless it was meant to be a subconscious thing like ooo he’s dead all along but that’s not what her arc is#it’s not ‘he’s been dead all along’ literally or figuratively. it’s ‘he’s unsafe and i don’t want him’#sigh. once again i am asking people to think about nanami and touga’s dynamic through touga’s eyes#it’s so interesting to me how people forget to consider his motivations or feelings on ANYTHING#like sure his motivations and feelings are scummy but they’re interesting!!!!! they intrigue me!!!!#compel me even#anyway ignore how i said i didn’t have the energy for this and then typed it all out anyway#dais.txt
72 notes
·
View notes
Text
He is a creature to me do you understand?
@lindentree @helsknight-daily
#spazzcat doodles#lindentree#helsknight-daily#helsknight#hermitcraft#helsmets#dragon!helsknight#i am tired and sore and i am coping with my new favorite wing-man#i was thinking really hard last night about how tired i am and it got me thinking about how sometimes you get so tired all you wanna do#is sit down and then i thought about how that would apply to wings and suddenly people with wings sounds like an olympic sport to me#could you imagine the energy it would take to hover#sure gliding on wind currents conserves energy but it's still the equivalent of holding your arms outstretched for a long time right?#anyway take all the scary what if you got tired stuff and flip it you know how after you get out of a pool and you've been swimming all day#you're just absolutely ravenous#what i'm getting at here is i bet you he descends on unsuspecting gas stations and makes off with all their snacks#the hermits wake up see helsknight and grian have broken in just to steal their high calorie chips and fuck off#that's it that's my vision
189 notes
·
View notes
Text
i may be stupid
#(but im not sure)#a doodley#i am not going to lie to you guys i am insanely scared of anti depressants. and adjacent medication.#first of all like ive said i dont think i need them#im doing way better than last yr(s) despite being in the same circumstances. i did in fact will my brain to get it together.#i told my doctor i think my issues are a result of my environment and that is what i think it is.#i dont think meds cld help change my innate personality flaws#second of all sorry but my ****** is all i have i cant risk losing it to the side effects#idk! like. idk. you guys really dont get it it really is just laziness for me#since i was a kid i just didnt have Goals and its continued to my detriment#i was also raised to doubt all my decisions so here we are#im sure my friends think im lazy bc what ive described to them IS laziness#im like the only person i know without hashtag goals and life motivation...and all my friends have mental health stuff too#so its not that...! its personality. its laziness#its literally like the ''my son is 35 and refuses to get a job and does nothing all day'' reddit posts#with ''he's not depressed he's lazy you should just kick him out and refuse to keep providing for him'' comments and all
63 notes
·
View notes
Note
"Scherz" is one letter away from the italian word for "joke"
Considering the whole "mini frogs are puns lol" thing, how does it feel being a Charachter with an Actual Narrative? <- someone with Protagonism (if i recall correctly) that would REALLY LOVE FOR THE CAST TO EXPAND. PLEASE, I CANT DO THIS ALONE. I JUST WANNA MINECRAFT-
"Scherz" is zero letters away from the German word for "Joke". In that it is the German word for joke. As I was so often reminded in my youth. SUCK IT HATERS
Well, as someone who successfully survived the years since 2019 when we published Mini and the Gang™, and found out that they may have, like, 50 more years to live, it is a little frustrating to have peaked at 27. I guess I have 50 years of trying to chase and reproduce that elation. What madness will this result in? Stick around to find out!
#protagonism#I am not sure I understand the last two lines of this ask#but here we are#I have only had a few moments in my life where I felt like 'oh yeah this feels like it could be from a movie'#and honestly more of them were thrillers than I personally care for#I have nearly been hit by lightning or falling trees on too many occasions#occupational hazards of working on montane rainforests#but yikes#anyway what does this have to do with minecraft?#I was in the minecraft beta back in 2011#and watched all of the original Yogscast series#but never really got into the game itself#still does not feel relevant#about me#answers by Mark#rainbowgod666
133 notes
·
View notes
Text
I’m probably a little late to the party (heh) but there’s something I’ve noticed concerning color theory and Max, and Max in general
When she is introduced to us as MADMAX, her situation with Billy makes her feel lonely and angry. She’s wearing red clothes (with a white stripe!) and her hair is down (letting her rage roam free).
In here, she’s clearly annoyed. She’s just left Billy’s car, Mr. Clarke made her stand before the class and named her Maxine when she just wanted to melt into the background and get over her first day at an unfamiliar school, still not thrilled about having to move from California.
Still, she’s zipped down, since those people didn’t do anything especially hurtful towards her and maybe she’s a little hopeful about them.
When she’s mad after an interaction with Billy she’s wearing red:
Darker red! She’s at school where she won’t have to deal with Billy for a while. She’s cooling like lava but there’s still one streak of the anger in the back of her head.
When the boys approach her, her zip-up sweatshirt is unzipped to show some of the color underneath. She’s happy! She will not let her guard down completely but she won’t hiss at them immediately! Still, she’s ready for disappointment and snapping right back to being fully red.
Yellow is not a lighter shade of red, but it’s definitely close on the color wheel. Closer to white, too! She is showing she’s not only mad, there also is softness inside her! It’s still a shade connected to red (anger) but yellow by itself is more of a happiness color. She wants to make friends but is still scared because of the new environment and Billy.
In the car with Billy (the scene where he wants to run over the party), the entire scene is shot in a way that’s barely letting us see her clothes. It’s mostly covered by hair, too, but we can see it’s still at least a little unzipped as there’s a bit of the yellow collar visible.
In the scene, she’s defending Hawkins saying, that it’s not that bad and that she can’t see any cows (yellow). She’s scared of Billy, so she’s trying to cover up her sympathy towards Hawkins and towards the boys (with red and her hair, Billy saw her get out of the car with the sweatshirt zipped up and hair down, now she’s covering her softness with what is familiar to Billy, so that he doesn’t see anything has changed, notice that softness and hurt her. That’s exactly what she does when she says she doesn’t know the boys trying to protect them from getting ran over).
Yellow! Fully yellow :) She’s happy to be shown weird pollywog-like creatures with the rest of the Party!
Right after Will gets possessed, her question as to what “true sight” means gets brushed off by all of the boys. She’s hurt and feels excluded, but her hurt makes her angry again. Next time we see her, she’s all red again.
“Party members only! This is non-negotiable.”
“I thought you guys wanted me in your Party!”
At the arcade! She’s already acclimated to Hawkins, and the arcade is her favorite place.
Alright, I’m getting tired and my third eye is slowly closing, so I’m going to wrap this up quickly, since I think I presented what the gist of the idea is.
In season 3, yellow, patterns, colors! She is now fully a member of the party! She has friends, she knows the secrets, El is back. This is the happiest she’s been.
Clothes are important in both of the girl’s characters! (El changes from murky colors to vivid patterns when she finds herself and there’s a post about El shedding layers of blue in season 4. I’d link it but can’t find it, I’m sorry!) There being a scene like this, with them fooling around with their clothes is basically the peak of happiness :)
Here Max gets really worried because of Billy. She’s feeling a bit guilty ‘cause that’s her step-brother that’s sowing chaos and hurting her friends. El is straining herself. The situation is looking BAD. Blue!
Beginning of season 4
Blue - she’s grieving and feeling guilty, Black coat - she’s hiding herself in a shell. She’s not particularly hiding her grief but she can close off at any moment.
(Btw Lucas is also wearing a blue shirt with some coats. I’d say he is sad because Max dumped him and doesn’t want to tell him things but the coats have a couple of colors because he’s hiding away his nerdiness in order to be cool :)
Now, the overcoat is blue with yellow elements - Max is being honest about her grief. She’s targeted by Vecna, the Hawkins gang knows she is SAD. It’s her last day, she can unfurl. The sweatshirt is unzipped and showing red and white underneath, the same colors we’ve seen her wear when we first met her. The girl that slammed the door of Billy’s car. The one that was scared of him. That girl is still inside Max.
Sometimes, she’s wearing this. Grief covered up with brownish-reddish... Red. She’s going back to her previous self, she is talking to Lucas again and he SEES her... But to get that shade of red you go more towards black on the color wheel. She’s not that vivid, fiery red anymore. There are bits of that girl deep inside her, but she’s too tired to make it her entire self. She’s tired.
#idk if this makes sense#i did not do research befor this i literally got this idea while changing clothes#and it works for the most part#maybe a bit delusional here and there#but i choose to choose being chill and just in awe of the costume department#i am also pretty sure you beautiful people have decoded this long ago#since the color theory makes a big part of the show#either way i love max#if she doesn't wear the prettiest colors in s5 then why should i live to see it#i hope SHE will be able to see it though#although blind max is beautiful; she doesn't deserve it :(#max mayfield#stranger things#lumax#elumax#elmax#not really color theory because i don't know the color theory :) literally just vibes#aaand i'm not gonna reread what i've written cuz i'm tired. hope it makes any sense.#but you're smart too so you can probably get the gist of what i was trying to say
532 notes
·
View notes
Text
found out while putting together matthias's oc page that his name has the exact same etymology and meaning as theo's name...
i’m sure this is information matthias is very normal about…
#theo is in fact a gift from god so jot that down !#river dipping#i've been throwing myself into oc stuff bc i'm not doing hot mentally which is... tbh when i do my best writing 😭#none of this is new tho i wrote the bios and 'at a glance' intros months and months ago when i first made an oc page#which is why i do plan on rewriting them but for now i'm leaving them like this... so i guess the echthroi page is done?#obviously echthroi has more characters than this but i haven't taken new screenshots of everyone yet...#i put the gray cas bg back in my game a few days ago only to completely forget i wanted to take new headshots for the oc page 😭#like these are just placeholders... i want the backgrounds to match the oc page. oh... or maybe i could just do transparent pics?#i think i remember vyx made a post abt how to do that... will look into that when i open the game again. rn i'm at my keyboard 🧑💻#like i am writing new things! started a google doc for theo yesterday and have been writing on it here and there since then#i've already cried in there... lmaooo. i like oc pages for sure but i think a huge google doc is what i really need to keep track of things#i drop so much lore in tags on here and it's like! river write that down somewhere else or you'll lose it 😭#like i fr have never actually written down any of the info i've shared on here. i've just had all this oc knowledge stored in my brain.#so i went through and copied over a tonnn of tags and posts i've made into google docs but i just know i'm missing things i've probably#said in the tags of their core tagged posts... 🧍 if my blog didn't have so many posts i'd have an easier time going through it but 🤷#and on top of that i've been making a bunch of posts about theo and matthias on my main acc. which is like 🧍 well great now there's more#i'm gonna lose track of...... i fr have gottt to get into the habit of actually putting things down in theo's google doc!!!#i'm just trying to figure out the best way to format it all but i've downloaded a few templates that i've been messing with.#...anyway. if it isn't obvious i'm trying to get back to posting on here. i'm opening my inbox now with the intent to just.#sit here in my inbox until i can get myself to reply. lads... avpd is actually so torturous i'm not kidding.#i feel like i'm dying trying to get myself to interact with people sometimes even despite how badly i want!!!! to interact!!!#theo and me and our avoidant trauma responses holding hands and skipping around together
64 notes
·
View notes
Text
Many people have pointed out (in relation to Crocodad) how in Japanese the etymology of the word "wani" (crocodile) is a bit complicated to say the least and in mythology could mean a variety of things, including a shark, sea monster or a dragon
Which, of course, is quite an interesting coincidence. Crocodile does often get referred to as "wani" not just by Luffy but some other characters, and so it would be just a little funny if both of Luffy's dads were sorta kinda called dragons
There's also people pointing out how Zoro's mother was called "Tera", similar to terra (earth) and Sanji's mother was named Sora (sky). So if Luffy's birthing parent was named after a water-dwelling creature, well, it'd be cute and round out the monster trio's birthing parents in a funny way, since we'd have earth, sky and the sea
But what really is fucking me up about the whole wani-thing is the Myth of Toyotama-hime
So the TL:DR; of the myth is
The pregnant princess Toyotama came from the Ryuuguu Castle deep in the oceans onto land to give birth to her child, telling her husband that when she would give birth, she would revert back into her true form, requesting him to not look at her while she gave birth.
But her husband could not keep that promise, so he peeked in on his wife, only to witness a giant wani giving birth. The sight of this horrified the husband so much he fled, while Toyotama princess was so hurt by what had happened that she returned to the sea, abandoning her child.
Indeed, this myth bringing up wani pregnancy is just. An interesting coincidence for Crocodad speculation
Of course, we know Oda borrows from mythology (fucking, Fishman Island's castle is literally the Ryuuguu Castle), so if Crocodad Real, it's genuinely plausible Oda could('ve) take(n) inspiration from that very myth
Thing about it is that though...
Like, if we're assuming Crocodile never fully realized he was trans until he got pregnant, then him transitioning either immidiately or as soon as he could after giving birth would make sense. Dude seeks out Iva-chan and gets the t-juice*, so on and so forth, but my question is like, would that have been before or after delivering the baby to Dragon (so he could then pass it onto Garp)
*(Or hell, maybe Iva-chan was there helping deliver the baby, helping Crocodile crack his own egg etc, maybe the secret Iva-chan is holding over Crocoboy's head isn't that they knew Crocodile is trans and could out them, but knowing Crocodile gave birth to god know whose child)
Because like
How did Dragon find out about his partner transitioning?
Did pre-T Crocodile tell him he was transitioning while handing over the baby? Or did he just leave without an explanation and allowed Dragon to just Take In The Change after it had happened whenever they saw each other again (if they ever did, for all we know he could've just walked away without talking to Dragon again and Dragon just found out either from Iva-chan directly or from seeing him on the news)
Or did Crocodile transition first and then deliver the baby to Dragon without any warning, again, just giving Dragon one hell pf a surprise
In any scenario, how did that even go down?
And we have to ask the sad question of... is Dragon a Bisexual King or not? And would Crocodile have been... afraid of Dragon's reaction? (This would've been a younger Crocodile mind you, who would literally have been just coming out of his shell, and that shit's scary man)
Because if Toyotama Princess is any indicator, this wani's relationship did not end well after her truth was revealed
Like, let's say Crocodile transitioned first and then showed up without warning as a man to Dragon to hand over the baby.
Thing is, while we know VERY LITTLE about Dragon still, I can't imagine him being like violently transphobic or even lashing out at his partner when he'd come out. But I could imagine him being so shocked he'd be left utterly speechless.
And I'm not entirely sure which would be worse; Dragon outright but "kindly" telling Crocodile he's not into men and breaking the poor bastard's heart, or Bi!Dragon being too shocked to say anything, letting Crocodile to just jump to conclusions based on his reaction (and maybe then causing Dragon to jump into further conclusions (that Crocodile must actually be into women)), unintentionally causing a divorce out of sheer misunderstanding and literal lack of communication
And the sad part is, considdering Dragon is a very secretive man, who according to the Crocodad Theory can't even have told his partner his full name mind you... The miscommunication seems very plausible to me?? Does it not?
Or, maybe Crocodile delivered the baby to Dragon pre-T and told him he's going to Iva-chan without further explanation, jumping into conclusions, afraid to hear what Dragon would say. So he just leaves without explaining before Dragon gets to say a word. And Dragon just accepts it. Assuming he's the one getting dumped.
Either way, whatever might've happened can't have been good, can it
Also, considdering Garp is a fucking idiot (affectionate), and Luffy clearly inherited The Stupid from his grandfather, I would not be surprised if Dragon was also actually a bit of a himbo underneath that serious face he puts on (either that or Crocodile kept on smoking while pregnant)
Which could also turn what would otherwise be a tragic miscommunication into an absolute comedy if Crocodile and Dragon ever met again and the two realized that they're both idiots who jumped into conclusions and ruined their marriage by refusing to talk about their fucking feelings to each other. This is an absolute trainwreck of a family
But considdering the things Crocodile has done by this point*, would it ever even be possible for the two to reconcile?? Because, althought Dragon is pro-overthrowing corrupt governments especially if they're affiliated with the World Government, from what I can tell, he's still against unnececary violence (Vegapunk even comments that Dragon "hates war" in a flashback) and needless loss of life. And Crocodile caused just that.
*And I don't even mean the failed attempt at taking over Alabasta, I mean the drought Crocodile caused that caused countless people to starve to death and then caused the civil war which had already taken lives and permanently disabled people BEFORE the Strawhats ever even get to Alabasta. Like Crocodile's bomb may have been a dud but he still caused people to die for no reason, and I can't imagine Dragon being fine with that. But then again, Robin and other Baroque Works members also contributed to the loss of life and their sins have been neatly swept under the rug so IDK
And like. We don't know if Crocodile moonlighted as a Revolutionary for like 10+ years after Luffy was born and slowly went out of contact or if he just left immidiately. But theoretically, the two might not have even seen each other in like almost 20 years
That'd be a long time to carry a broken heart
How the fuck would you even heal from that
Also like
Crocodile did seem a little suicidal at Impel Down if I'm being honest
Like.
He had a dream of becoming Pirate King. But he lost to Whitebeard, and his dreams were ruined.
Dude had a master plan to take over a country that took him almost a decade to pull off, only for it to get wrecked in the final hour by a literal child.
His useless underlings then come and try to break him out of prison
And he chooses to stay
When we finally see his face for the first time in Impel Down... His mouth might be forming a smile, but those eyes aren't
And he even says it himself
"I didn't think there'd be anything for me to do if I were free"
Is it not like he has given up on life entirely..?
And sure, he does ask to be let out so he can get revenge on Whitebeard, but was it out of a genuine belief he could actually take down the old man or just a slightly more fun way to die than rotting away in prison for the next few decades?
You know the saying, "to be loved is to be changed"
Frankly, the same goes for the reverse. Being unloved, or believing yourself to be unloveable will change you. For the worse
#OP Meta#Crocodad#Sir Crocodile#I know I keep on saying I don't believe in Crocodad anymore and here I am back on my bullshit again#This asshole is the only thing keeping me from falling apart rn just please let me have this#I'm just so fucking intriqued by the storytelling potential here#Of what the fuck happened#If it's real#The tragedy could be absolutely devastating#Or you could have an insane One Piece slapstick reunion#I am extremely fond of the idea of The Disaster Family mind you#Because they could be so fucking funny (especially if you included Garp) (Holy shit can you fucking IMAGINE)#Like yes emotional reunion between Crocodile and Luffy yes sure#But please considder#Luffy somehow finding out and then demanding for an explanation from An Extremely Reluctant Crocodile#Who can't really do much because he doesn't have it in him to hurt his baby boy but also The Baby Boy is an unstoppable MENACE#The slapstick would be hysterical#Also I am pro-Bullying Crocodile#Moon posting#On a slightly less downer of a note to end on#While Crocodile might've given up on life before Marineford he certainly found a reason to live during/after Marineford#This was supposed to be a short post how did it turn into borderline fanfic
77 notes
·
View notes
Text
I've just realized what I need most from this season - it isn't an apology (from Ed and/or Izzy) or an earnest talk-it-through like I previously thought I wanted.
What I need is Ed realizing that he needs both Stede and Izzy in his life.
After all the heartbreak, I think it is so important that both of them know that the life they shared for so many years wasn't just a weight pulling both of them under.
I want Ed to realize that there are parts of Izzy's izzyness and their day-to-day life that are parts of who Ed is, and that there's something missing without him. I'd like Ed to (re-)learn that there are certain things which are just more fun with Izzy, or things he likes to share specifically with him because Izzy gets it.
At the end of this season, I need Ed to realize that while Stede makes him happy, to be truly happy and fulfilled he needs Izzy too.
#ofmd#izzy hands#edward teach#stede bonnet#they don't have to live together or anything but I'd just like Izzy to know how important he is to Ed#on pins and needles here for their first real meeting after the storm#I am so sure those 2 have the most fascinating past#and so much love for each other deep down#maybe unicorn Izzy is becoming more like his younger self again#ah what do I know I just want them to realize how great the other one really is
92 notes
·
View notes
Note
wait, why can’t a decent amount of the members in proto-thunderclan not hunt?
A lot of them have serious physical disabilities! It's enough that it poses a logistical problem, which they are committed to overcoming together.
Thunder Storm's three legs makes him slower than his companions. He's ferociously powerful, but like a male lion, he has to rely on his "lionesses" to slow a large animal.
Bright Storm has asthma from her heroics trying to save SkyClan cats from a fire. She's taking that from Gray Wing, who is famously the first major death now. Like her son, she has a difficult time with chasing prey.
Bumble is dyspraxic. She's a terrible hunter and fighter and struggles with self-worth because OTHERS used it to dehumanize her, and continues to, even after an entire society forms out of love of her.
Sunlit Frost has permanent nerve damage in his arm from the fire, and ends up working so hard that it makes his disability worse. A bite on the good paw from Snake becomes infected after he refuses to sit out from digging graves after the First Battle; I am planning a chunky B-plot about Sunlit coming to terms with the fact he has to retire early.
That's FOUR major members of a small group with physical disabilities that make hunting hard or impossible. They have a lot of logistical problems that I will actually be exploring solutions to.
#One of the solutions will probably be a hog hunt which I'm excited for#As there's a bunch of things each person can do to help with that#It's really such a shame that canon is so hyperfixated on disabled cats feeling like they 'need to be useful' in a very well established--#Society where they CAN just be comfortably cared for#It frustrates me that the series keeps portraying that as a Good Thing and not either a tragedy of self-worth OR an exploration of--#SOCIAL ableism.#So for BB!DOTC I'm going to try and take aim at both#Ok then; let's TALK about a small underdog group who needs its members to contribute#And let's talk about how even THIS little group INNATELY values its members. How that is good and natural#And how there's NO excuse for the bigger group to be so cruel. It's not neccesity. It never was. It was spite.#Thunder Storm says 'The point of having a group at all is to care for each other. NOT to have it serve you.'#Man really comes out here like FROM EACH ACCORDING TO HIS ABILITY. TO EACH ACCORDING TO HIS NEED#And I am trying to think of how to stress how MUCH food SkyClan has. Like how I'll show that...#I'll definitely need to make sure to set up a lot during the time Thunder Storm is Clear Sky's acolyte.#Btw does that sound like a good word? Trying to figure out what Tribe cats call their apprentices#Because fuuuuck no I'm not calling them To-bes
124 notes
·
View notes
Text
Got inspired to revisit this FEH comic redraw I did when it first dropped! Specifically these panels:
Ended up freestyling that second Xane though LMFAOO he is just so impish to me...
If you wanna get Old Art Jumpscared I'll also include the original sketch under cut!
AAAAAAAAA JUMPSACRE AAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!
In a way though, I'm glad that I dropped it and picked it up again later... like I feel like this isn't even from that long ago (guy who has no sense of the passage of time voice), but the characterization and even design of Moe is so different. The Scrunch and :< face were game changers for it LMFAOOO (also just making it autisticer 👍)
Beyond that I think everyone looks a lot better and closer to how I envision them, esp Loki!
#fire emblem#feh#please do not the moe. it doesn't like it :(#TRIED. to capture that really pretty hair gradient that's in loki's mythic but idk if i got it#i am really satisfied w the little changes i made to xane's pallette though! his halloween alt is just. So Red LMFAO#WHICH. UNDERSTANDABLE. that is his signature color. i feel like just a few changes pull it together more though#which does tempt me to do a full body art of him...... but don't hold me to it LMFAO#ALSO DAMN....... moe interactions with other charas that aren't the askr siblings/unofficial extended family.......#like in universe it probably happens frequently/casually but. it's rare for me to actually draw it LMFAOO#i just.... always have the askr siblings on my mind.......#also i am just deeply in love w alfonse here like. this WAS the initial pose i was imagining when i first drew this#i ended up cropping it so much though. wasn't as skilled in Drawing Really Small yet#also just. i feel like there's more layers here w the updated moe characterization like. he's not just In Too Deep for the summoner#he knows it really doesn't like that (being touched ESP without warning/permission).#like beyond his own feelings he has a reason to be so intensely protective. which i'm also sure#is what he tells himself.#they just have a really funny dynamic. that i hope shines through every now and again! 😅#fe alfonse#fe xane#fe loki#moe tag#summoner oc#my art#my comics
22 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
