#i might just hope they forget me LOL | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gayspock · 7 months

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#inanebullshit today i walked to the other gym near me to check if i have access to it yet and i dont but they were like "ohh<3 come in tomorrow anyway we'll give yo u a free 3 day pass<3" despite the fact ive USED ONE for the other place and bro i needed a rest day tomorrow but they were so lovely i cant not now....

#Egg.txt #i dont think it'll be v suitable to get there anyyyyway bc i'll get there way later than i get to my usual spot #and i realised the walk is literallyyy the same 😭... maybe longer....#i might just hope they forget me LOL #but ughh yeah its like i dont mind walking at all its just idk if i can get to places on tiiimeeeee #i wanted to try and get a later start yknow bc i feel like im really drained lately and im wondering if thats iy but ugh idk idk

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melly-artes · 1 month

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Oughta be posting things here more often

#pokemon sv #trainer kieran #pokemon scarvi #pokemon scarlet and violet #art #i draw all the time i just forget to post lol #also i hope everyone knows the kieran drink is actually pretty good #its a chocolate and vanilla iced coffee specifically #go half and half and stir it #its like 30oz and you might see god but its great if you need a wake me up

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lenievi · 10 months

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Stargate SG-1 is so good. I love it so much 🥺

#might spam you over the week. i think i'll use it to get a distance from snw for a while #i mean i'll watch the kirk-uhura episode on friday but maybe kirk will disappoint me and since the episode after is the xover #i might just... wait until the season is finished or something #(i mean i don't think kirk will disappoint me since the bits in the trailers sounded good... but you never know lol)#it's not that season 2 is bad but i want less spock and i don't think that's happening any time soon #hopefully he won't really have a big role in uhura's episode but then again they might finally introduce him and uhura and the lute who even #knows #which is obviously what i have wanted ever since the announcement but me and spock have a complicated relationship atm lol #i should forget about spock #i hope the transporter scene with kirk and la'an is happening #i hope that kirk's smile when he beams aboard is aimed at la'an #even if that was the only scene they'd share in that episode i'd be content #but the trailer could lie to me #even though so far the trailers actually delivered what was 'promised'#in s1 they felt more misleading but this time what i thought was happening in the trailers happened in the show so far #anyway #stargate is good :D #leni's nonsense

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ivorydice · 14 days

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Torn between feeling incredibly amused and kinda bummed out that an old screenshot of mine that people reposted around is now on some officially licensed collab clothing thing. Like. Aww. But also lmaoooooooo.

#i can't be specific unfortunately because i'd like to keep my old blog private #and yes i'm 98% sure it's mine because it's a very unique picture #because i used hacks to get it lol #i've had my pics and gifs from my old blog reposted a lot before #yesterday i found some of them on twitter #i hope it becomes a mystery #i hope someone realises hey this picture isn't possible to get in game and it's not a part of any promos at all so where did it come from #it was meeeeeeeeeee #lol it's probably just the depression + fatigue that makes me feel bummed out about it #and also that i'm not having a great time creatively lately #like i do have much bigger problems to think about #i might actually buy the sweatshirt that would be kinda funny. and also i do kinda like it #okay glugging caffeine time to forget about it byeeeeeeeeee #dice ramblings

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mel-loly · 1 year

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-“Just a flower, in the middle of the field at night, a light is turned on and reveals.. A day arriving with confident hope and silent happiness!”🌹🐝

#for those who didn't get it.. today is my birthday! and so tomorrow is really the day of the party and etc..#that's why I put “arriving” because tomorrow is a really special and very important event in my life akzbskhzjsb #and yes. I'm cosplaying as princess bela. she's one of my favorite characters and her dress.. It's literally a dream come true for me!#because I'm really going to use one similar to this one tomorrow irl and-#I won't tell you guys more details because it's personal things but- well. that's a little explain of what the art is about!#I really feel very happy.. and I admit. I don't even know how to explain my happiness but.. well...#I feel special. surrounded by people who *really* love me and show true affection for me and..#that I just have to thank. for everything. I have gratitude for all of you! like- thank you very much. really. for everything..#I can't even express in words how grateful I am for each of you #know that I love and appreciate everyone who is still with me on this journey called life!#and of course- I couldn't forget to talk about him lol. thanks to mike!#I don't know what would have become of me if I hadn't met someone as friendly and good-hearted as him #he was always by my side and made me feel more special in every day. in a unique way and one of the most important to me..#I love him very much/p. and I hope that our friendship will be forever happy and respectful the way it already is!#(of course. this also works for the other friends I made here too- please don't get mad or jealous! I love you all. okay??)#and well.. that's it.#I hope I still stay here. that I enjoy my day and face any fear or harm that I might have ahead of me and..#that I just hope for the best. I put everything in God's hands and I feel confident that things will work out no matter what the cost!#thank you guys again for everything and happy birthday to me lol-💛#happy birthday to me #it's my birthday #mel creator #mel loly #cosplaying of beauty and the beast #i'm mel and this is my blog✌️#my art blog #art mel #art #my art #my oc character

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aroaessidhe · 9 months

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2023 reads // twitter thread

Court of the Undying Seasons

NA high fantasy

demigirl volunteers to be taken by the vampires instead of her friend intending to kill them for revenge, but quickly learns that’ll be impossible unless she becomes one

she has to get through her training to become a vampire or live as a human thrall, and quickly gets swept up in their world - and discovers a string of murders that could have dire consequences for them all

#Court of the Undying Seasons #aroaessidhe 2023 reads #ok i was kinda hoping this would be more me than most things in its genre niche....but is just kinda is that #why is the main couple a thing? what is the attraction? i feel like I skipped half a book. you’re gonna kill him right #just really did not get that at all lmao. ur usual dark fantasy romance i gues #it’s kind of pitched as ‘she wants to kill vamps!!!’ but like. she immediately learns that’ll be too hard and basically forgets about it lo #i feel like the courts being named after colours reads. well you know it reads like the stereotype of YA with different factions to choose #but I guess I get that if they were called by their alt names it would have been a lot of confusing info to keep track of #the mc being a demigirl is pretty subtle #if you’re looking for it you can see the trans coding #but if you weren’t I feel like it might just read as girl who’s slightly uncomfortable with her appearance…#which is fine I guess. but just so you know if you're picking it up for that #also picked it up for ace side characters but like…. it’s not rly like the authors other books #there’s vague mentions but tbqh I’ve forgotten who is supposed to be ace #(probably because I read like 6 other books between starting and finishing this)#also genderfluid side character who is like. treated as two different people when they’re girl or boy version?#which is sort of treated as a vampire thing but i thought it felt odd #anyway all in all not entirely bad just not for me at all lol

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syncrovoid-presents · 2 months

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Does anyone have advice for things to do on your birthday (after friends tell you they're too busy to do anything and/don't want to do anything)?

It's coming soon and the weather isn't the best for hiking to stores or anything but I might grab a cake and some ice cream, maybe some berries since they're usually too expensive? Who knows! I'll probably just chill I think, birthdays always aren't fun haha

#syncrovoid.txt #rambling #birthday #im not having a birthday party of any sorts since people are busy and its me lol #ive had 1 birthday party with friends and it was cool!#but yeah people are too far away/busy/arent close enough to do anything anyways so itl just be me myself and i once more lol #its good that people are upfront about forgetting or not caring i think? its better than nothing #<- sorry im in a weird mood and might be venting a bit #<- its all due to circumstance and stuff. i know some people get to experience those things and some people dont. its just a little awkward #its a touch like a few months ago where my best friend purposefully didnt invite me to her birthday party because she wanted to celebrate #with her new group of friends #sorry im venting. just feeling weird #hope everyone is having a good day!

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ikyw-t · 5 months

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y'know I think about this tweet often. I don't think truer words have ever been spoken....

#had a whole mini rant that i wrote and then deleted lol..........#no one else may know his shitty he was but i will always know and i shall absolutely not forgive or forget #however i do still start seething on occasion when i remember that after we broke up for years i never thought of him at all #except when i pass his street on occasion bc he happens to live nearby which is very ughhh but it's mostly whatever #and then out of the blue in early 2021 he texted and CALLED me (i did not answer. what a fucking jumpscare jfc)#to tell me he had been stalking my spotify playlists and saving them and #even had the fuuuuucking audacity. to think they were a personal message in a bottle just for him.#we had not spoken in 3 years. can u imagine the absolute lack of fucking common sense or logic. the fucking audacity of men is unparalleled #and then i had nightmares and paranoia about him for the next like full year. like wtf.#also i think i said 2021 but actually that happened in 2022 so we actually hadn't spoken in four full years.#where on gods green earth woild he get the idea. that my public spotify playlist.#was dedicated to my terrible obsessive bully of a boyfriend from fucking high school.#i just can't even fucking fathom the mental gymnastics necessary.#anyway. i ended up ranting anyway #it just makes me so angry that i didnt think about him for years and then he so efficiently once again ruined my life #bc he had been incredibly obsessive and so I had reason to worry he might just show up at my house at some point.#i ended up ranting anyway. what can u do.#anyway. I hope he's having a terrible time. he deserves it.

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dariadraws · 2 years

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so a real throwback for this blog, but i was cleaning up my art folder and found this little relic of my homestuck days tucked away in a forgotten subfolder. @callmearcturus i know youre working on other things these days but Chamomile, rose water, and other unlikely intoxicants was deeply influential to me back in the day, and i still reread it from time to time, so i figured that since this was basically finished, i might as well set it free into the world.

#homestuck #dirkjake #dirk strider #Jake English #OOF those tags take me back #chamomile rose water and other unlikely intoxicants #archie if you had a specific tag for that fic forgive me but i cannot for the life of me recall it #also when i say throwback i mean THROW. BACK. this is back when i still drew with LINEART #i checked the date on the fic and it's from 2017! its been 5 years can yall believe that???#also im at a complete loss as to why and how i managed to essentially finish this piece and then not only drop it #but Completely Forget about it for literally 5 whole years i legit have no idea how or why that happened lol #ngl if i didnt like the background and colours so much i might just have held on to this forever bc this is NOT my artstyle anymore #and my inner critic is pirouetting off the gd handle at everything i would do differently if i tried this today #however! we wont be listening to her bc back when i made this i recall being very proud of it; and i still really love this scene in the fic #which is what this is ultimately for! this was made to express my love for a fic i loved then and still love now #& im not gonna deprive one of my fave authors of the gift of fic-art just bc my brain automatically interprets all my old art as 'cringe'#anyways sorry for the rambling tags its very late & im a little loopy from sleep deprivation but archie i love your fic & hope you like this #daria draws #callmearcturus

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year

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#ok so like this is fine bc im not in a horrible mood rn. this is more i feel like complaining bc what im doing is kinda ridiculous #but my memory is so bad that ill probably forget if i dont write it out. but basically 4 days a week i have to come in starting at 7.30 to #water and prep for measurements. then from 9am to 6.15pm i have to nonstop take the measurements. and theyre timed so that means #i get abt 4 min to do anything before i have to take another measurement. which is abt enough time to start to focus and then have to stop #which is very fucking frustrating. and i have to manage data. coordinate for this fucking paper. and keep track of like 10 other things for #work stuff. which means that it takes me like and hour to send easy emails and they come out all fucked uo bc my brain is so shot #but on top of that i also have to fucking do the steps to get set up for my new school in the fall. and like ive officially accepted the #offer but havent talked to my new advisor since then so now theres this weird gap where im like. uh fuck do i ask for wtf im supposed to #do? bc ive been able to do things for like 2 or 3 weeks but then my life started collapsing in around me. and like there r probably #instructions somewhere but i cant fucking read lol. whatever. hes nice i just need to find the energy and words to email him and b like lol #srry everythings been insane. but bc ive waited so long i have to compulsively keep going back to check that ive been accepted like somehow #that would change while im not looking. ugh. and ive also fucked myself over housing wise bc theres a housing shortage in the city and huge #demand of housing on camus so theres a wait list for everything but i cant fucking apply bc i cant get my id to work. and fucking idk who #to call or email abt that. but idk i might have to have roomates for a semester. or my parents offered to give me some extra money for an #apartment until i can get one that doesnt put me in the red on a grad student budget. ugh. i dont wanna do either of those things #but christ do i not want roommates. ill figure something out. its just annoying and difficult from so far away #and it makes me kinda sad bc ppl r like: r u excited?! and im like. i cant really think abt that. partly bc im constanly putting out fires #in the present so theres not really space for it. partly bc i dont allow myself to b excited abt things so as not to get my hopes up.#but just after i accepted i was excited. and now it feels like im reaching my hand out toward a floating light just out of reach. like #its a nice idea but i wont believe until it happens. but that just bc ive become distorted about things #and i dont even get a weekend bc the 4 days of measurement r friday to Monday and i cant fucking relax on weekdays bc ppl r like hey can u #do this??? and there r things i can only do on weekdays so its like ok i guess ill just suffer forever thrn. and my boss texts me like: hey #did u do X? and am like: uuuuuh i fucking dont kno what day it is anymore. i dont understand y we have to meet. lets just not talk bc im #afraid ill say something worrying. so yea its pretty fucked up rn. but this stuff ends on the 24th #then ill probably not take a break and fucking finish the measurements for another project bc i just really need it to b done. i need it #all to b done so i can fucking wash my hands of this and fucking quit and move away at the start of july... or August if i decide i hate #myself that much. ugh. at least the lab has been pretty empty so no ones seen me crying lol #also thr fucking rutgers guy emailed me yesterday like: hey u want this position? and im like bitch u r like a month too late also im in #my cringe fail era. i would not survive at ur school. ugh everything is terrible. 2 or 3 more months then i csn leave this place forever #unrelated

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abnormalpsychology · 1 year

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Sometimes this site gives me a much brighter flame of hope for the future and sometimes it makes me a whole lot worse. I think that’s worth being transparent about actually

#aandddd the shitty parts of this site are really really shitty #there’s this strange agreement on some things as if tumblr is a hive mind yet #like there is not one agreed opinion and idk #i forget there’s no real answers to anything because I’m not even trying to find answers I just want comfort #i feel like a bad person for enjoying things all the time just because of being here #despite the common claim of ‘renouncing cringe’#shame is so deeply entrenched in nd people and society that it just seems so hard to let go of #it’s literally perfect for oppressed people to use to make fun of others like ‘we’re the good kind tho not them’.#the purity culture of this place is so insanely insidious because none of us will ever be clean enough for each other.#that’s why we’re human beings and not. products #tumblr’s isolated but it’s not nearly as free as anyone here would like to believe it is. nor superior #other ways to cope with shame besides more shame would be nice you know what I mean #personalposting on main sorry #LMAO AND ME NEITHER!#and I’m hypocritical just by sharing this much rn to cope lmaoooooo #i post everything I post with the hope that it might help someone #and of course I’m fucked too!#insert that article that’s like ‘we should know less about each other’ lol #the commodification of the human spirit etc etc #existential dread and capitalism and etc etc etc #vent #bbge.vent

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fortunately-bi · 2 hours

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...... If I went on a hiatus for who knows how long again would y'all hate me....... 👉👈

#i just spent like an hour writing and rewriting a post trying to explain myself amd its just so hard to put into words #im bored here but not in a ew not enough content for the dopamine hit shit #in like a every time i scroll through I dont smile I dont see anything that makes me happy at all i dont get a laugh or anything #its just mindless brain rotting scrolling nothing wasting my time hoping maybe ill see a new artist to follow or something #and every time its nothing #so much nothing taking up so much of my time and space in my life and i already dont have a lot of time to begin with #ive made some awesome friends here ive had lovers from here ive had people who are no longer on this earth from here who ill never forget #i dont think ive really enjoyed anything on here in 7 years #ive left before for a really long time i think like a year or more or something #and i wont be totally unreachable of people message me ill respond but im so sick of this stupid app taking up my life #and all i ever get out of it is getting mad or getting depressed over shit that really is t worth my mental state over #all i ever feel on here is that the world fuckin sucks and theres not even anything here to make hanging around worth it #im not new to this site making me suicidal for an abundance of reasons and im luckily in a spot where i wont actually hurt myself #its just ideation and intrusive thoughts but its a pattern i cant keep ignoring #also im old tumblr im old tumblr and i think i will always be old tumblr im just not catching on to new shit anymore #the fact im even saying anything about a hiatus should show how pld tumblr i am no one does this anymore lol #i just don't want to be here anymore i dont really want to be anywhere online anymore tbh #its always something and i cant mentally keep up with it anymore i have too much going on in my life #my wife is having cancer removed on Tuesday im a lead teacher who has to take care of i think 8 babies now #i have problems i have actual problems that need me and need me to be as there as i can be #i cant be spiraling over stuff online on top of real world problems im in no position to do anything about on top of personal life problems #that are drastically affecting my life at home and hurting my family and loved ones #i have a mass in my thyroid which is so big i choke to the point i stop breathing if I dont have my meds i throw up all day #i have to see a neurologist because at best i have a pinched nerve at worst im having seizures and i might have to move states again #i dont have it in me to come on here and see stuff that makes me upset for the chance i might see something i like #and i can unfollow people and whatever but I dont have the energy or time to sift through people i follow on here #if you want to talk in dms or asks or you want to send me posts pls by all means continue to do so thats fine #but i think i need to take the app out of my line of sight again for a bit and just be in the moment again same with twitter #anyways i love yall i promise i am safe and not in harms way im just stressed af and i have got to start cutting things out that #arent doing anything other then making me miserable

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daimoan · 14 days

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dont remember if i ever was this angry at anyone before

#keep thinking abt [redacted]#wack. tbh #like embarrassing idgaf abt this guy why is he still on my mind.#this is some ego feeding shit like its cool to hate and be angry or something?#its just that i think he should be corrected. but the system is not in agreement on this.#guy was like my best friend for a couple months never even asked abt the system lol n theyr like looking out for him #or i guess mby theyre looking out for me/us. so as to not go to jail/be haunted by our choices our whole lives.#whatever #i know how to make it stop it is just taking time and effort. because its like 1. kind of addictive so i keep accidentaly/habitually reinfo #cing it and 2. the other option is to face that im hurt and i cant do shit about it realy other than ... LeArN from it or some shit #like learn what? i already went full schizoid over this.#maybe i dont need to learn shit lol maybe i already did it :)#so just the pain then. and overcoming the hate habit. and like just letting it go and forgetting abt it #but the thing is that he needs to die i think.#i want to kill kill kill kill him so bad.#i hope hes not reading this in case i ask to meet him again sometime. for business.#maybe thats why its still on my mind #because im unwilling to let go of the idea that we could help eachother if i wasnt so stupid hurt over some little thing (the nasty shit he #pulled that hurt me lol) like bro. bro. im not going to just get over it. like thts rly the thing. 3-5 yrs ago i would have totally just #elected to get over it and make up or smth like that.#and im v unwilling to do that now while lots of my brain architecture is still built for that interaction style.#so when im thinking kill kill kill kill im going to [redacted as fuck im not putting that shit online this is already bad enough] mby im #actually killing the mental structures that make me a target for abuse :)))))))))#all is good in the world i love myself and my life. and absolutely no one else. except my mom and my friends and that one other guy who als #might read my blog but i really doubt it bc he doesnt evenrly ask me how im doing or anything . its cool though. for now.

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everymlmhybrid · 1 month

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Hello! Is your fic a resdogs one? If so I’m super excited to see if for you plan to post… love your blog!

yes, it is !! thank youuuuu i'm so glad <333 i'm nearing the end of it, and then I'll have a lot to add in and to edit, but when it's properly done i'll probably be posting it chapter-by-chapter on ao3 w/ it linked on here! i wanna say I'll at least start to post it in the summertime? but don't quote me on that lol.

I'm not going to lie So Much Happens in it bc the first half is 50k and the second half i'm on now is 41k (either could end up longer or shorter from editing tho lol)

but ANYWAYS the basic starting concept is that Freddy actually does get medical attention, but he still has to get the hell off Joe's radar before he can start throwing accusations at him, and Larry (my beautiful man. my beautiful, stupidly-trusting man.) lets him hole up in a hotel with him, at first just while he's still healing, and then while Joe's still "convinced" that Freddy is a cop (i.e. while he's still completely right about him lol). And this entire time Freddy's reporting back to Holdaway but also making up excuses for why he can't just up and leave without causing too much suspicion, just so Freddy can let himself be selfish and enjoy this brief time he's going to get with Larry, even if he's lying half the time. (over-exaggeration. he's, frankly, so stupidly honest with him. he's more honest with Larry than most of his own friends, just not about the shit that Very Much Matters.)

AND A LOT HAPPENS. so much. it's about trust and love and work and healing and making yourself worse and making yourself better and being trapped and trapping yourself and freeing yourself and I'M EXCITED to finish it and even more excited for you to be able to read it!!!!!!

#HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE I STARTED BLABBING #listen i'm writing chapter 14 right now and there's frottage. that's all you gotta know. forget this post and remember that. ok.#all the themes i scream abt with them (lying for the other's good! undying trust in each other even when it's misplaced! Freddy's growing #distrust in his fellow cops after they nearly let him die in that warehouse! a dash of Crime Boyfriends! smthng else i'm forgetting!) are #all in this bc it's like my receptacle to scream my personal favorite interpretations into and it just so happens to work out into a plot #.txt #I SWEAR THE PLOT is good it's just hard for me to explain the big picture since My Job is to Write the small picture LOL #+ there's bits that explain any parts that might make you kinda go ''wait but why would XYZ??'' but they're all like. spoiler-y lol #but anyways THANK YOU SO MUCH. it means the world to me really <3333333 i'm kicking my feet and giggling answering this #ask #asks #anon #ok if i proofread my answer one more time i'll go insane SEND POST yet again THANK YOU SO MUCH #edit OH ALSO if it ends up being too long for your tastes dw I have a few short 1-3 chapter resdogs fics I work on in between this one too #+ I'll post those here tooooo !!!!!!!

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beautiful-lively · 10 months

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#lol okay so i reminded by friend abt a fanfic she has promised to read thru for me like several months ago at this point #and i was like i know you got plans so just like send what you've already done bc i'd like to look at this weekend #and she said yeah ofc! ill read it over #and shes done fuckall still #and its like. i also dont want to just edit and post it now bc i dont want her to waste her time on it #but WHY you not just sending me what you have when i asked for it bc i KNEW you wouldnt get to look at this weekend #she going to vacation with her friends like #idk. might just do it and hope she forgets abt it again lmao

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frogmascquerade · 11 months

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#big fan of the way jodie approaches/approached her role as the doctor :)#like listening to interviews n podcasts n stuff w her talking about how she was thinking of how to act #and how to be the doctor and dealing w the public's reaction to being a woman and being the first woman and how much of an impact #that gender does and doesnt have on the role #super interesting to me!#makes me hopeful for future actors who might be aware of this stuff too :) both cis men and ppl who arent cis men #and it makes me excited/nervous/hopeful for ncuti as well and how his take on the doctor will be and hopefully he'll be receieved well #altho i do wish theyd kinda stop calling him the first gay doctor bc... hello....#even tho i know the doctor is kinda unlabeled and theyve talked about it on the show before #but these fools better not forget about 13 and yaz 🤚🤚🤚🤚 idc how underdeveloped their relationship was. they are very real to ME #and they are real to THEM so thank you everyone #for coming to my ted talk #im excited for the 60th anniv. but extra excited for s14 (if theyll call it that lol idk how the bbc separates specials and the seasons)#and super hoping we'll get to see capt jack return. maybe river. maybe yaz altho i think her and 13 felt special so i think #shed be a guest role but i would still v much enjoy it :)#but whoever the new companion is/are im excited to see them too wow im just happy for new episodes !!!#oh and i know the regen from tennant to ncuti is gonna be good but i am slightly sad we dont get to see 13 to ncuti like that would be such #a rush of emotions that i think is so crucial to that scene #like from 10 to 11 i think gives me the most whiplash and 11 to 12 was heartbreaking too and 12 to 13 was so sweet and and sad but exciting #as well #and 9 to 10 was quick but set up the idea so well and eccleston summed it up so well

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