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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 3 months

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Happy Valentine's Day! (and this blog's first post anniversary!)

#poorly drawn mdzs #better drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #Woah...it's been a whole *year* since I took the leap and uploaded my 'first attempt' art.#It's outdated now but it holds a special place in my heart for the fact it started all of this off.#Calling this 'poorly-drawn' was always about accepting that my art was going to be imperfect and messy - and doing it anyways!#There has been a staggering number of times I have drawn something I almost didn't upload because I didn't think it was 'good enough'#only for someone to say they liked it - or that it made them laugh. And it has helped me realize -#-The worst critic for my work has always been myself. If I listened to it all the time...well we would not be here now B'*)#And now that I have dabbled in other fandoms I can truly see how lucky was to start out with the MXTX fans.#The supportive messages and tags have truly been a guiding force toward my artistic and self improvement.#I really can't describe how grateful I am.#Thank you for seeing something worth rooting for when I was just figuring things out.#Thank you for being sweeter than the candy I have strategically hidden in the nooks and crannies of this house.#But watch out! If you forget to find them we will get ants.#I remembered to not hide chocolate in the bed this year. Yes I know it melted last time. Yes it did stain. I'm still sorry.#Thank you for loving me regardless <3 Even if it looked like I shit the bed real bad.

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ladeldee · 3 months

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Dropped what I was doing to get a draft of a design for Chun-sik done :D

and him in his Pelican floatie :]

#Qsmp #qsmp Chunsik #I like the colours very much so far!! Might have to work them around a bit.#It was so cute when Acau started laughing that he couldn't see Chin-suk's face #Can't wait to get to know them both better

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celestialrealms · 4 months

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Fun fact: In Barbatos's intimacy storyline in Nightbringer he ends up living with Solomon and MC at Cocytus Hall temporarily. Here's a highlight from his 40 intimacy call:

The way he makes Solomon sit in the corner. 😭 You cannot convince me he didn't raise this man.

#+ the tonal shift when he started talking to mc again made me laugh ngl #i'm already spoiled for these calls but there's no substitution for the voice work #but yeah uhh spoilers in all of nb's intimacy calls they basically end up in a committed relationship w mc #i gotta step it up with farming so i can be annoying about it. barbatos's phone calls are SO good tbh #though now that mc and solomon aren't living at cocytus hall i question them making it so theyre living there even up to 100 intimacy?#i know whales are probably much speedier but its still a bit weird considering the devs #still won't let mc and barbatos's relationship progress in the main story practically at all in comparison to the phone calls #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #obey me nightbringer #obey me #obey me shall we date #barbatos obey me #barbatos #solomon #also man i wish they'd spent some of this budget on routes instead considering how long it will be for anyone to really see these calls

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utilitycaster · 4 months

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honestly the funniest thing about maintagged character hate is that 99% of people engaging in it talk like toddlers. they are all a hair's breadth away from calling the pretend guy they don't like a big dumb mean doodoo head.

#someone maintagged essek hate around when I queued this and legit called him bleh-sick and I laughed out loud at work when i saw it #like. did you think people would see this and be like damn u have a point no they will think you are a baby or perhaps a clown #queue

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starflungwaddledee · 3 months

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I'm just sayin', Starstruck and Kirby would be adorable. But also Starstruck and Meta-Knight might be the funniest thing you could possibly do. :)

hear me out: peter pan (2003) window scene

been staunchly avoiding typing too much on most of these but i have some thoughts about this one!

you know... i had actually never even considered kirby for the shipaganza. mostly because i think of him as holding such a strong and unique position in the hearts of everyone who knows him, in a way that is devout but also seems fairly romance-free. and i'm actually very interested in the complex relationships that he has with his friends! but i wonder if not considering him was maybe a disservice, because if anyone has an abundance of the capacity for love, it's him, right?

i think that kirby could eventually occupy a similar heart-space for starstruck as bandee, though it would take longer. i strongly suspect that bandee's love of kirby would rub off on her, if nothing else.

i'm not sure either of them... really understand the premise of romance or dating, so it might not be a typical sort of thing. but i think they could giggle and laugh together and shoot each other slightly smitten looks when the other one isn't paying attention, and be very invested in each others happiness.

he adds a pass by her window to his early morning flight, on the off chance she might be up to join him. she's always thinking of him when he's off saving the world, and distinguishes his star from all the others in the sky with ease. the irresistible allure of adventure vs someone who has never seen any of the wonders of your planet before. someone who finds as much unrestrained joy and delight in the mundane as you do. eating paper cups you find on the ground.

you know i could see it.

#my art #kirby #starstruck dee #🎀💖#you know the scene where she's hesitating in the window and the music starts and he shoots her The Most infectious smile of all time #that one!!!#does anyone remember this movie?#i think if kirby showed up in the window offering a whimsical adventure and a charming smile nobody would think twice.#when i made this comparison i could NOT stop thinking about it. peter and wendy are a little too romo coded for my tastes in general #but there's a beautiful feeling of choosing freedom and delight in that scene. and i think kirby COULD be a little cheeky!!#the part where he blows the fairy dust all over her? you know i considered it. considered drawing the whole thing. barely resisted.#is this one canon to her? yes. i think so but not romantically. and this visit might be a special circumstance.#he's a busy little guy; he doesn't take her as often as he might like. certainly not as much as SHE would like. but i think... yes.#at least once. as a treat.#you know what i think could also be cute? kirby/bandee/starstruck triad. drop a braincell haver (bandee) in there.#three circles who are absolutely insane about each other in a surprisingly similar way. i think it could work? yes? no? thoughts?#<- prompt it if you wanna see it i guess!#also... starstruck and meta knight..... we'll come back to that! we'll circle right around. boy howdy will we circle back to *that*.#*laughs nervously*

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royalarchivist · 6 months

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Green Gay Ninja's "team full of strong opinionated leaders" ran into a lot of communication issues on Day 1, but nobody has more experience wrangling loud rowdy people than FitMC.

#FitMC #QSMP #Etoiles #ForeverPlayerG #Forever Player #Purgatory #Forever #Green Team #As someone who's worked as an educator and someone who Cannot Stand People Talking Over Each Other and/or Not Listening To Each Other #This was so hard for me to listen to I started skipping through the VOD because it was frustrating me to a ridiculous degree #but Fit doing this made me laugh out loud #I've definitely been in his shoes before #Q #Poor Etoiles they picked him as team leader but nobody listens to him #Today (or I guess yesterday. I'm queueing this on Sunday and it'll post on Monday) Etoiles was talking about it #and he said he was a bit shy / quiet when they elected him as leader #and he kinda laughed at how he constantly got talked over #meanwhile I'm just like [SEETHES]#It's not actually THAT big of a deal I just have hangups about being spoken over which makes me sensitive seeing it happen to others #regardless of the circumstance #But it is literally Not That Big of a deal here. They're all friends just hanging out going on a roadtrip in Purgatory together lmao #Anyways #When I occasionally catch myself being frustrated over non-issues like this I just give myself a vibe check like:#[Etoiles voice] ''Relaaaaaaaax bro; it's not that deep''#A bit of a tangent but #I think a lot (not all but a lot) of fandom discourse stems from people projecting their personal feelings onto situations #''Well if *I* was in this character's place I'd feel [insert emotion]''#''Therefore my perspective on this matter is objectively correct because I have experience with [whatever] so I know how they'd feel''#I think we all need to remember to vibe check ourselves and take a step back occasionally. Not all experiences are universal #Fit

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aromanticannibal · 2 months

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katsuki who wears one of those watches that records pulse post-war to make sure his heart doesn't decide to stop Working. cue everyone ever having fun looking at it to see what flusters him

#Izuku smiles at katsuki and whoever has to stop themselves from laughing when they see his pulse spike #reminder that I am Not a medical dude I am a literature fuck idk if that's how pulse works #mad mha ramblings//#mha #bkdk

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twomanyfandomshelp · 1 month

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I watched Scott’s Real Life video first because he and Joel are the main two I watch, which is ironic because of their ongoing in-game feud and very different personalities, video styles, general vibes, etc., but I digress.

My first thought when I saw the title was “Yay, another life series!” My second thought, upon seeing Joel standing in the circle, was “Oh my gosh, Joel, three SMPs at the same time? Why does he do this to himself?” Then, after watching for a bit, I was like, “Okay, never mind, this an April Fools video, still fun though.” And then I proceeded to enjoy the silliness and binge everybody else’s videos.

Let me tell you, watching Martyn’s video before Scar’s and hearing Scar yell that he’d fallen out of his wheelchair, I was really worried, and I immediately searched for Scar’s video to make sure he was okay. I’m glad he’s alright, I bet that was scary.

On another note, do y’all consider Cleo’s win cannon? Cause I do! Go Cleo, she deserved this.

I’m kinda sad it wasn’t Joel or Jimmy though, I got really excited when I realized how well Jimmy was doing. He got, what, 7th place? The canary curse has officially been broken!

This post has gotten way longer than I intended. Oh well.

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theinactivefaniguess · 2 years

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fWhip just standing there and staring at Jimmy and Tango when they reunited reminded me of something...

... Ya know?

#this was my genuine reaction when I saw fWhip just standing there staring at the both of them #I literally had to stop because I was laughing so much lmaooo #'poor guy seeing his ex all excited about this weird visitor lmaooo'#also yes I'm aware that Jimmy and fWhip are exes so this doesn't work 100%#but it was funny in my head so I'll just put that out there #... you know if the hc x empires crossover had happened quite a bit earlier this would've been completely correct even #and there's a fanfic idea in there. alright!#anyways.#hc x empires #hermitcraft x empires #Empires smp #empires season 2 #hermitcraft #Jimmy Solidarity #Solidaritygaming #TangoTek #fWhip #(Also Grian Just Being There(tm) in the screenshot is funny as well)

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metabolizemotions · 3 days

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The creative choices on the show are as subjective as each of the viewer's interpretations.

I think a lot of why I personally feel deeply uncomfortable n resistant is the asymmetry.

I get the need for variety. The same thing may be expressed differently for different characters. A healing journey will differ from person to person. Each step is also taken on a personalized timeline.

But I can't help but think of the asymmetry of how the show dealt with Mason vs Beckett n even Dixon. They condemned Mason immediately at his worst but dug deep to show the sides of Beckett n Dixon that were still human despite it all.

The trigger shot scene with Beckett felt like 0 to 100 in his reconciliation with Maya. It felt like a 12-step program of which he skipped many steps when it came to Maya. From the get-go, we saw a sexist, incompetent captain who was demeaning to his team n constantly put them under stress n in danger, on top of endangering civilians n even equipment. For months, we saw this middle-aged man in a position of power, take perverse joy in bullying a younger female subordinate to appease his ego. That was workplace harassment. He also took out his unresolved trauma on the people around him, in this case, people he had authority over. Alcoholism was not the sole reason for all his bad behavior. Even if it was, it should not be used to excuse it.

The team, esp Maya, was trapped in this hostile work environment sanctioned by the female chief. This was a more common n insidious manifestation of toxic masculinity, one that was amplified by his position of power, n sometimes even supported by women, when their goals aligned in the power struggle.

Yet the show gave so much more grace n compassion to the bullies than the bullied. The team treated Beckett n Ross with more kindness n respect than they earned, n less kindness n more apathy towards Maya than she deserved.

Then he was given a long, carefully constructed redemption arc, while Mason, a rushed condemnation arc.

It felt like 100 to 0 with Mason. We saw Mason briefly in earlier seasons, mainly thru the eyes of Maya. We missed a lot of the in b/w. We caught him again at his worst. We only saw the side that was full of hate ideology, but not his side that was also human. We knew about his addiction n homelessness. But we didn’t see how as a young abused person w/o positive role models n a support system, he was vulnerable to these hate groups, which he clung to, when offered him just a semblance of belonging or respect. He had not learned to let go of his resentment of their parents n Maya but taught to transfer this unresolved hate to fill a meaning void.

The scene itself b/w Maya n Mason was great. It was an urgent n imperative story to tell. Maya's actions were right n necessary. But in the bigger scheme of things, it felt like a quick tie-up of loose ends, of a once-beloved brother, who came n went abruptly. Despite it being a logical narrative choice to wrap up the nature/nurture discussions of Marina n discovery that Maya's deepest fears about herself manifested in her bro instead. It's heartbreaking n yet disheartening that it was again about queer hate when it came to another main queer character on the show.

It is just jarring to juxtapose Mason with Beckett in 703 then 707. Also juxtaposing his empathy towards Maya with the lack thereof from the others, despite everyone having just been thru 706 n having witnessed Maya's breakdown. So, in a way, I see the actions of these characters as being designed with the goal to emphasize Beckett's empathetic side, in support of his arc.

When looking at a scene with 2 scene partners, what it is really about? Who it is really for? Would the scene be the same if one is replaced?

There are many different takes on this. For me, it was really about Maya, but choosing Beckett as the scene partner made the scene more for him. If it were for Maya, other scene partners would be more meaningful n realistic. Esp those who earned their right for her to be vulnerable with. Maya, who bottled her feelings, let alone spill her deeper emotions, to someone whom she never had a proper conversation with, not to mention a fraught shared history. To add, alone in a small enclosed space, while administering a shot that made her even more vulnerable.

For the realism argument, this was not more realistic to me than having Carina, for a show which took a lot of liberties. It was a choice to design the circumstances to make Carina n the others unavailable n combine 2 scenes together. Carina's also Maya's life partner n best friend. A more realistic choice for Maya to share this devastating heartbreak n grieving process with. It was a big aspect of their marriage. We saw many discussions b/w them yet when it finally came to the conclusion, it was with the least likely person, an almost stranger.

I see the trigger shot as part of Marina's baby journey I wish we get to see them undergoing together. It reminded me of 5b in that Marina's story about their own baby journey - again with someone of a fraught shared history, of a different nature - was more about him n to lead to his own bio family story. Marina's story was messy n got nowhere. And here we r, seasons later, rushing thru it.

It's not that Maya/ Carina or Marina should not have scenes with others. It's that it's usually more about the others even if it's their storyline. Or they r the backdrop for others' drama. They either isolate Marina or suddenly include them or one of them in an in-depth discussion of their private matters with others, usually something we hear about for the first time. I just don't remember something like that happening with other characters. Is it too much to ask to see a married w|w couple, with little screentime, share a meaningful conversation or moment first, also or exclusively? We so rarely see such a rep on TV. The show is not about Marina, but shouldn't their own story reasonably prioritize them?

#this is just my personal take on this #this is in no way to invalidate other takes #i'm sorry i really don't know how to be succinct #my fav thing abt fandom #is to talk. cry. laugh. be silly n fangirl tog #abt fictional chs #or actors #i love to see diff povs even if i may disagree w #when expressed respectfully #i love #discussions #or see details someone noticed #interesting connections...#feelings r valid #but povs r subjective #my 2 cents is #it's ok to like only one ch #or all #hav opinions on everything #or accept everything #u decide what u want out of it #viewers have opinions #agreeing w everything is in itself an opinion #i rant a lot abt the decisions bts #it doesnt mean i don't respect their hard work #my opinion is just my pov #it's not more right or better just diff #it's my way to make sense of this #station 19 comments #station 19

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prettyhighforawhiteguyblog · 4 months

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I'm the wife in my marriage.

It's funny to me anyway. Funny to me because my wife is the very picture of femininity, loving, caring, sexy, pretty, beautiful wife, loving and adored by all her children. And a satisfied and hot for her husband.

But to me she is beautiful and terrible as the Dawn! Treacherous as the Seas! Stronger than the foundations of the Earth! All shall love her and despair!

And yet she chose me.

So to all the hella ladies who rejected my advances? Y'all missed out. Because she saw in me what way too many people couldn't. And sometimes still can't.

And she wants to run my life. And the lives of our whole family. And we all kinda love it. Mostly. But it ain't worth the headache or heartache of fighting her on anything. She's Daddy's little princess and her mother is the loving matron and queen bitch of the family and we all stay in line. Mostly. I love to do my own thing too much for my own good. But it keeps our fights about stupid stuff instead of my weed use again.

(I'm dead ass functional and present from 6am on till I finally get my insomniac ass too sleep while high just to escape the constant anxiety about my sick daughter's upcoming surgery, my dying suegro, my mourning wife, disturbed autistic son, special needs princess Daddy's girl I'm spoiling her to death to make her just as powerful and ungovernable mother and it's working too well already. Have you ever negotiated with a hostile bitchy entitled as fuck child? )

Anyway, you wouldn't know it looking at me or talking normal chitchat, but I'm pretty fucking manly. In the way my culture defines manliness. I'm not very masculine. But I'm very manly.

I'm feminine as fuck in my household. I mother the kids, help their emotional development, work on my wife's emotional and mental well-being, and I'm the one never in the mood for sex. And I do every single thing she says. And then she does the discipline and management of the family's affairs. And she's the one who has to seduce me. Did I mention she was sexy as fuck? (While I'm awkward as fuck every time we even roleplay.) And a horny Latina. (That's why these horny sexy, nice, Latinos are taking over. It's natural selection. The Whites just can't compete and as usual are getting their panties in a twist over not being able to compete even with everything in their favor to out reproduce them all but it was too many kids for a nuclear family to handle Whites.) So beautiful hot queen sexy as fuck Latina seduces me every night. #blessed. So fuck yeah I don't wanna fuck up this arrangement. So I do everything she tells me to and treat her real good and let her win every argument and over apologize. Except when I make a rare exception to make a stand in something important or just to make some trouble and have some fun.

Oh yeah. She's a clean freak 😮‍💨 But she's an impatient Latina housewife perfectionist clean freak. So she gets mad at my perfectly good job when company isn't ever coming job and tells me to stop even trying to clean. Go play Minecraft with your daughter to keep her occupied.🤣

I have the best living situation ever. I'll be your bitch my bitchy highness. Just please keep playing with my hair on your lap. Oh, and that sucking my dick the way you do and being right 95% of the time on judgement calls.

So yeah I'm the wife.

And I got a pretty good life.

#and know you know the rest of the story #when i was s younger man i had a good paying job at a factory plant as a temp worker #i liked this job #and it was easy clean indoor temp controlled light labor with a jovial #kindly and generally loving crowd of people all just trying to earn a living in this shit economy #and care for each get along with each other #it was a really nice atmosphere. there was only a little manager taking advantage of a woman's situation to force a relationship.#but she was petty please about the whole arrangement because she was lonely and he was kind and likable and #good looking younger guy #and it made her job impossible to get the boot #even as it got easier to boot #anyways i worked my ass off and just tried to get along with the boss #and it paid great #We could have been poor and happy working jobs like that for life if i really had to got some reason #but anyways this bossman manager sees me sweeping my ass off a clean floor and instead of telling me to go lean on a post for a bit #tells me I'm doing a good job #and that I'll make a someone s fine wife someday #i wanted to slap that smug mother fucker up there head w my broom. But i was laughing to hard at that fuckers joke because i liked the guy.#and i liked my job #anyway #here i am being a good little wife #and I'm living the life of Reilly doing it #i don't know the etymology of that phrase is. only my Dad says it in my experience #it might be good own little creation.#you're welcome #And the mother fucker just let me keep sweeping my dumbass all over a clean floor!#Union strong

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faunandfloraas · 25 days

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Nothing funnier to me than a fansite that horrifically white washes pics of the guys until they genuinely look like walking corpses but then will have DO NOT EDIT in all their captions like baby.... if there's anyone here who should have the editing software taken away, it's you...

#see this is where i might potentially have a controversial opinion #bc while i 100% always link back to twt videos or pics from concerts and stuff #bc i think its the polite and fair thing to do #i also find the DO NOT EDIT DO NOT REPOST stuff slightly silly #just bc ypure taking pictures of famous people and posting them on the internet like.... people are going to #i think putting credit is 100% the right thing to do but also if i ever went to a show and took a pic that wasnt a total blur #id p much expect others to save it and do stuff with it bc thats just how the internet works #also somehow pics taken at the airport and other invasive places with those captions especially make me laugh like you can go mob them #and take those pics but also expect everyone else to respect your copyright or something?#like at least with concert stuff its expected to take videos so i really do believe you shpuld link back #bc its like wow thank you for taking that video and sharing that funny moment with the rest of us #but some of it im like Nah be for real #like yeah always link back to op when applicable but its not always applicable yk #and white washers dont deserve anything at all

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cathalbravecog · 1 year

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first thing i drew on my new tablet to test it out is the tv beast themselves

#gonna take a while to get used to... tfw u get an intuos for the buttons but realize u have #way too much muscle memory for ur old keyboard shortcuts (im talking YEARS. of the same/similar shortcuts. like. when did i get my first #tablet???? 2015??? YEAH.) (not my latest one btw i went thru a few tablets but yknow)#oh well!! ill see #took a bit to get used to but eventually i got into the swing of it since the work space on this is a bit smaller than my old one #i LOVEEEEE how the pen feels tho like the brush strokes its more consistent and i think ill be able to do good if ... my hand isnt hurty #and once i get less shaky with it!!!!! its sooo good. then again my old tablets pen had...its nib for 2+ish years #YEAH IT WAS BAD BAD....kept asking for replacement nibs but wouldnt get em #oops... oh well! anyways we ar the SMOOOOFFF zone HEE HEE #anyways i misse ddrawing cathal............. the skrunkle . the him. care him much very much a lot #trying out different ways to draw him too #and not try to be as on model as i was before... just have fun yknow??? get stylized and funky with it!§§§§!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HEEHEHEHEHEEE #soarry my brain wants to amsh buttons randomly rrly hard rn so its evil laugh time #ok normal tags time GO #toontown #toontown corporate clash #multislacker #cathalposting #guz art

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allpromarlo · 12 days

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i don’t think a character has ever polarized me as much as geto has. i will hate on that mfer without a lick of shame but let me see ONE fanart of him and

#he’s so UGHHHHH but i just Do Not like his character #at least post defection #bc oh you massacred an entire village started a cult and tried to manipulate a fragile 16 year old into a murder machine??? ok #pre defection that’s my baby my angel my sweet boy #but cult leader geto is just. No??#design wise yes but everything else boy GET the fuck outta here #that’s why i like kenjaku better bc he actually makes the look work #if you don’t believe me look at the difference between jjk0 geto and s2 kenjaku. goodnight #and also a bit irked by his fans constantly bringing him up in conversations about gojo……#like ok. we get it you think jjk is a BL drama. whatever can we move on now #like who called yall LMAOOOOO #n e ways geto my pookie bear my baby angel <3<3<3 i h8 his ass so much i was laughing when yuta black flashed him into next tuesday #and those lil girls he adopted?? BROOOO when sukuna killed them that was my reason for living #like YESSSS GET THEM AGAIN FOR ME KING!!!#they served no purpose and they were annoying goodbye #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #geto suguru #suguru geto #also stsg shippers dni #bc ew #no #makes sense. does not compel me at all #i Do Not want to see it 😌

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eyluvu · 5 days

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the JOY when i see that stupid monster james p sullivan on my screen again

#monsters at work s2 you will always be famous #for the sulley keeping boos drawing framed on his desk #and hugging it when it fell #and the look of BETRAYAL when it was stolen #and him saying how MI's new laugh power was inspired by boo #nobody will ever understand my LOVE for sulley #and boo #and i miss boo #disappointed we had no boo cameo #am i going to write monsters inc fanfiction now?#yes #i miss those two silly gay monsters and their surrogate daughter #refuse to believe its not canon that sulley goes to her room every week to gossip #like theres NO WAY #idc if the door hroke #they will find a way #thats his GIRL #okay okay #sulley i love you #james p sullivan i love you i love you i love you #please adopt me #also seeing inside fearco was super exciting too #and monsters inc obvs the classic #monstersinc #monsters inc #monsters at work #maw #monsters at work season 2 #monsters university #james p sullivan

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good-beanswrites · 1 month

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A drabble for an anon asking about the prisoners watching their music videos! This is focused on specifically Mikoto’s initial shock at seeing MeMe for the first time, but just know that Double comes with a whole new set of shocks as he truly listens to John for the first time ;-;

Mikoto was no criminal.

He didn’t know how to break into locked rooms, or hack into complex prison security systems. He figured there was no way in hell he’d be able to see these so-called incriminating videos that the Warden was recording, and had resolved himself to an eternity of wondering what they could be. He was shocked when he didn’t need to do a single thing to gain access to them – Es simply adjusted the computer monitor and told him he could hit play when (and if) he wished. Then they left the room.

“A-are you sure?” he called, but they were already gone.

Mikoto blinked at the screen. It showed a stretched version of his apartment couch, near his bathroom wall, broken to reveal sky above. He thought he could spot his tarot cards at the bottom of the frame. Had Milgram broken into his home to film this?

He scoffed, and hit play.

Distorted guitar started up. He flinched as his own face appeared for a moment – looking directly into the camera and making a wild expression he would never have made if someone was recording. His body tensed up more as he heard his own voice start to sing lyrics he’d never spoken before in his life. He wasn’t even a good singer, and here he was sounding like a professional.

There were plenty of ways to accomplish all of this, of course. Software could mimic one’s voice, making him say anything these crazy reality hosts wanted. A team could easily add some digital effects to a stunt double and match his appearance perfectly. Knowing that didn’t make the experience any less unsettling.

He watched himself commit a nasty murder. He watched himself return home bloodied. But it was all ridiculous. How could Milgram even claim that this was him? He’d never raised a hand to anyone in his life. Were the other prisoners’ videos as outlandish as this one?

But then, a switch.

The song shifted to a new melody. He appeared to wake up from his couch, and suddenly Mikoto got the sense that this was him.

He was struck with how familiar this new segment sounded. It simultaneously felt like a favorite song he must have played on loop not too long ago, and one that he’d never heard before. As it played, each new note and lyric felt right on the tip of his tongue.

It ended as quickly as it began. The song returned to the heavy-metal-murder aesthetic it had started with, and once again he felt like he was watching a cheap copy of himself onscreen. He watched another murder, a shower scene (had the warden seen all that? How embarrassing…) and then he turned to his bathroom mirror.

At the same time as his musical counterpart, Mikoto leapt backwards in horror.

His eyes remained glued to the screen. His hand flew up to grab the lower half of his face. It was fake, he told himself. AI and CGI and all that. It was fake. It had to be.

Something deep inside of him said “no. That’s real. That’s me.”

Something else deep inside of him echoed the sentiment.

The video was less than four minutes of music, but by the end he was panting and tugging at his hair as if he’d endured hours of prison torture. He burst out of the room. He sucked in breath after breath. The melodies still played in his mind, lines repeating in his memory as he tried to put as much distance between himself and that little television screen.

He found the others in the common room. They gave him a knowing look, but somehow he knew his experience had been very different from their own. Es approached him.

They studied his expression for a moment. Thankfully, they didn’t ask anything stupid, like “how did it go?” or “what did you think?”

Instead, they just told him, “if you ever want to watch it again, just let me know, I can get it set up for you.”

He would want to see it again. Of course, it would be better, then. He would take a moment to calm down. He’d watch it later and everything would be okay. He’d have a clearer mind. He’d pick out all the little camera tricks they used to make it. He’d be sure it was a fake, and laugh about how ridiculous he was being now.

Of course. Of course.

He nodded to Es, unable to produce any words. Es left him.

The rules in this prison never made any sense, but in this case, he was grateful. He wouldn’t need to figure out any snooping or hacking to get access to the video again. After all, he was no criminal.

… he wasn’t, was he?

#milgram #mikoto kayano #thanks again!! this was super fun to do 👀#i was so sad that they cant see their videos in canon so it made me so happy to work out how it may work/feel #you know when theres a song you used to love but its been too long and you sort of forgot the words #but as theyre playing youre like ‘ahhh i knew that’#thats what im picturing #something unnervingly familiar #as mentioned in the hcs i think john would have a very different reaction #hed be happy to see himself but upset to see mikoto so afraid of him #:(#i like to think that john watching meme is what prompts some of his lyrics in double #i think the opening shots of bring it on would convince fuuta that someone had just hacked his cameras #but then there would be shots they shouldnt have any way to get #and the same for mikoto seeing his apartment/the train station and then suddenly himself in the shower…#he probably laughs it off with the others knowing that they came back a bit more calm than hes currently feeling #so he fakes it as long as possible before having another Moment alone in his cell that night #OUGH #drabbles

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