#i know it won’t happen my therapist has verified it but just hearing something like that is always such a punch to the dick | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kthynes · 3 years

Text

the caller you have reached (chris evans x reader)

pairing: chris evans x fem!reader

summary: chris was trying to drunkenly call the woman he loved and wanted to get back with but instead he reaches you, a shrink.

warning: swearing (sailor level), brief mentions of mental health

**IMPORTANT disclaimer: I won't be dabbling into the hard hitting topics of mental health in this short only because I'm not a certified health professional and so I can't be providing a written, unbiased, often characterized diagnosis towards any sort of mental health disorder because really, those types of sensitivities need proper care and output. With that being said, I do want to emphasize the notions of seeking help and not being afraid to seek help when needed. It's hard, but we all fight a battle and no battle is big or small or better or worse.

If my followers or readers do feel the need to privately chat with me, I'm here and I can you lend you an ear. Otherwise let's be kind and uplift another while we can. No harm in doing good and being better, that's for sure!

-end rant-

This short is dedicated to the following lovelies:

@princess-evans-addict

@mrs-djokovic

@slut-for-chris-evans

@saltyflowermakertaco

@bitchyslut99

@patzammit

@itskikiyooo

@maximeevansblog

Being a working adult is dreadful but the work you do is the most fulfilling kind of anarchy. You are a therapist, you work to heal and you work together with people who willingly reach out to you and your facility of care. There is that balance, the altering nuances in between that allows you to do what you do best. You advocate for good prosperity of mental health and accolade of teachable moments that fosters a safe space for your clients, not patients, but the people who deserve to be heard and not be medically categorized.

Your salubrious passion keeps you grounded. In your lifetime, you've seen the imperial impacts of poor mental health and it has been a detrimental drive in how you retreat and give back to a small found community.

"Okay." You exhale to yourself while leafing through another client chart. You're working off the clock, stuck in the renaissance of your homey office space while the outside world turns pitch black.

In the appropriate fields you jot down important takeaways from your last sit in session with heavy concertation and reasoning, you try to congregate a treatment plan all before you cellphone cries for you in venturous fashion.

"Hello?" You answer without checking the caller ID, tucking the device between your ear and shoulder so that way you could work and talk.

"Jenny!" The man boisterously shouts. "Jenny baby please talk to me! Let me make it up to you, let's just do this right, please. I'm fucked up here."

"I'm sorry but you have the wrong number." You infringe sounding like the posh, automated answering machine lady.

"Oh what the fuck Jenny — oh cah'mon don't do that, don't be like that baby." You re-verify a local number and it doesn't belong to anyone you know of. So you wonder who this man is but choose not to press further instead you tell him what is right from the knowing wrong.

"I'm not Jenny."

"Seriously?" He yells, forcing you to hold the phone away from your ear. "That can't be... This is—" He recites the number that is similar to yours but the last two digits are off.

"You got 42, not 53." It's an easy mistake to recall, a swipe of a drunken thumb could've mixed that up, so this time around, you're forgiving. Not that it happens often.

"Oh no. That's—" The mystery man trails, something about his voice discerns you, it's familiar but in a hindbrain way that you can't put a finger on. "Fuuuuuuuck."

"Wait hold on, hold up, is this Jenny's assistant, Nina?" You exhale sharply sometimes it takes more than one try and a side of convincing to get your point across and your passiveness was certainly to blame.

"No I'm not her assistant either."

"Then who the hell are you?" He exasperates. You make the snide mistake of telling him your name and he buffers for a bit.

"Oh. So you really aren't anyone of my concern then?"

"No." You mildly retort. "I wouldn't want to be anyways."

"Okay well I'm not sorry then because I'm here trying to reach my girlfriend and I can't get to her because I have you on the line being a smartass." With that accent of his you can tell he's a patriotic Bostonian. One of your own kind and that furloughs your need to engage in this mindless drivel, it wouldn't get you or him anywhere. At least that's what you tell yourself before shutting him down.

"Well then maybe you should learn to listen first, how about that?" You snap, dropping your pen before you note down angry nonsense into your actual work.

"Hey nowwww!" He yells as if he's trying to be Hank Kinsley.

"It's clear that you're drunk."

He brushes you off on the other end, enigmatic in what he wants you to know. "This is Chris Evans, you're talking to Chris-motherfucking-Evans, you hear?"

"I do now." You say tersely.

"Good." He huffs. "Good... Cause you know I'm in the middle of bumfuck nowhere and this is what I get. This is what I seemingly deserve, god you women I swear..."

Your face changes. You don't agree to be a lending ear but somehow Chris forces you to hear him out.

"I told her Y/N. I TOLD her that I wasn't ready to take the next step but that doesn't mean that I don't want to be with her. And now she throws it back in my face by getting with some other guy she once dated back in high school. And somehow, I'm supposed to be ok with it and move on, as she tells me. How the hell am I supposed to do that, huh?"

"I, um, I don't know what to tell you." You sigh somberly.

"Of course you don't!" His Boston twang begins to nerve you as there some remitting frequency of it. Hearing him obnoxiously go off, reminds you of all your shrewd New England exes who were his exact counterpart when soused. A ludicrous memory that you relive again with time and perfect harmony.

"Listen lady all I'm saying is that I fucked up. I know I did alright? I mean it doesn't take much denominational math and the plot of Lost in Translation to get that. I get it!"

Jesus. You whisper the lords name in vain as you lean your forehead against the palm of your hand while your elbow rested on top of the desk.

"So, let me get this straight, you think yelling at a random woman will help get further?" You question a little acutely for his liking.

"I don't know but it sure as hell takes off the heat, sweetheart." Something about a man calling you sweetheart grinds your gears and now your molars.

"Okay, alright, let's talk." You begin, sitting up a bit and tearing out a blank page from your memo pad; you were doing a late night consultation, a small hash out.

"Schuwaaaaa." Chris enunciates the word sure and to much of his mayhem, he’s sprawled out on the curbside, somewhere in the nowhere land of L.A. He contented but also upset and you were simply crashing his little pity party.

"What is it that you want from Jenny?" You professionally prod. "How about we start there."

"Wooooah, what is that we're doing here?” Chris gets mildly defensive with you. “I dunno you like that. If we're gonna talk then you'll have to get through my publicist first because right now I plead the fifth.”

You exhale a deep and fulsome breath. No one troubles you like him. It's sanctimoniously unnerving.

"I'm a shrink, my job isn’t meant to incriminate my clients well-being, or anyone else’s for that matter.” You address calmly. “So, if you do require some solicited advice then we can keep this call under strict confidence. You have my word, Mr. Evans and the paperwork that will follow shortly after this call.”

Silence. There is some shocking silence which is brief before you're catapulted with disbelief and more cackles. "Holy mother fucking shit. You're kidding me?"

"I can run you by my credentials if you’d like?” You mention stiffly.

"God I’ve reached a cuckoo hotline!" Wrong. That's a horrible thing to say and you'd think a man like him would've been more sensitive about his choice of words, inebriated or not.

"Far from it."

"Tell me something, alright? How many grown, adult men come crying to you?" Chris is edging with curiosity even though his eyes are betrayingly reddened after crying into a bottle of Dewars 18. He doesn't make that known to you and you never cared to ask.

"Enough to know that they cry." You simply state.

"Huh. So this is just another Tuesday for you then.” Chris scoff, the bottle making it to his lips and then swishing back down again.

"Comes with the territory except I don't tolerate drunkenness." You motely add. "Can you keep the bottle aside for the time being? Just until we're done here."

"That's understandable and oh yeah sure, sure, I won't touch it." You can hear the glass bottle 'clink' when coming into contact with the pavement.

"Now tell me about Jenny." You softly inquire.

"What do you wanna know? How we fuck or how we met?" Chris giggles like a naughty school yard boy.

"How did you two meet?" You slam the words urgently, nearly spelling out the cause.

"Oh! Oh. We met on the job." Chris chuckles punitively.

"Okay and did you guys connect instantly or was there a slow build up?" You involuntarily took notes for any PR rep of his that wanted solid evidence that would preside this call, cover your bases and your poor ass along with it.

"Instantly. Our chemistry read was off the charts." He explains with a slight hiccup. "Sorry."

"Great. So it was more so a work relationship that later grew into something more correct?"

"Pretty much."

"So when did you start developing feelings for her?"

"Um I'd say..." Chris tucks his chin, burps and then excuses himself before continuing. "Just before we wrapped up filming. But then I think somewhere in between all that I realized that she was my kind of girl, my... better half."

"And what made you come to that realization?"

"Well for one she has this infectious laugh that would have you laughing with her, there's that sound of beauty and pureness to it. And then with that, there were all the little things she'd do for me that made me think, like damn she's the one, she's it for me and that for better or for worse, I'd need her more than she'd ever need me."

Chris gets sad and you feel for him. Your pen stops moving when you were about to prescribe him some mind memory exercises. He was human. Humans hurt. Humans make mistakes. Humans stray but they also love. That's all Chris did. He loved with all of his heart to not expect the same love in return.

"You know Chris, we don't always get the love we deserve and sometimes its sucks. Sometimes you wanna kick it back with a bottle of Dewars 18 and shake your fists in the air." Chris quietly perks up at your choice of alcohol that you didn't know he was forcefully downing. He fashions a small half smile that you don't see but hear faintly. "But there's also a time and a place and things happen, people come apart, people get together, people do people and there's that fine line of letting life run its uneven course."

"I mean you sometimes have to not be okay to be okay again and I know that from my many years of helpful healing. It gets okay, never fully better and I think that's just how it is. You acknowledge your pain, your trauma and then you go on while being mindful of that transition."

"Wow."

"Hey, um, look, I actually have to get going. But if you can, just down the rest of that bottle and get yourself home."

"Are you sure?" Chris gawks.

"I mean you were already halfway through and it's not like I can physically stop you, right? And besides this is what I'm prescribing to you. I want you to acknowledge your pain, drink away your sorrows and then smash that bottle so you can be relieved from that trauma and hurt. After that you need to fix up and start new, have a mature conversation with her, if you can and then have your feet hitting the ground again. Don't fall into the routine of heartbreak even if it becomes too hard, you hear me?"

"Loud and clear."

"Good." You sniff and start to put things away. "I know you're a good guy Chris, from how you are on TV and in interviews, I'm amazed by how articulate you are. You have the right mindset so I have no doubts that you'll fall back in any way. But if you do, please don't hesitate to reach out, I might have to hand you off to another cohort but nonetheless it can be worked out even if it does feel like you might be sparring on your own. You'll get the help you need."

"Great, thanks." Chris responds in his conscious state of thought. He feels pathetic with himself and that doesn't have you galling over the fact, instead you let him be.

"Do you need me to order you an Uber? Cab? Call a friend for ya?" You laugh easily and Chris hears it clearly, smiling in return.

"An Uber would be nice. I'll try to share you my location."

"Sure, on me and that'd be great."

"Thanks."

"No problem... And your ride should be here in two minutes, just look out for Raul in black Elantra." You inform him after checking your phone.

"Nice."

"You have a goodnight now Chris."

"You too." The line cuts and you're given a piece of your life back. You gather your belongings, flip off the light switch and make your way home. There's some truth and some brokenness in every situation. You knew Chris was going to be OK even if he didn't consult you afterwards. For you, there was no need. He's a smart man and he proves this over a prolonged period of time when he finally finds himself back on the market and then eventually in a relationship with a faceless and very loving woman from his own hometown.

He was finally happy, making you serendipitously glad that you were the caller he had reached.

#chris evans fluff #chris evans imagine #chris evans x reader #chris evans

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dontcare77ghj · 4 years

Text

Fears

Natasha x reader x Steve x Tony

The Maximoff twins had changed sides. When you and the team first met the kids, they had been a hassle. Pietro, the speedster, had quite literally run laps around the team as he caused chaos on the field. He had been more annoying than dangerous, almost like a small child. His sister, Wanda, on the other hand, was a much larger issue than her brother.

Wanda was dangerous. She ran on anger, and her goal was revenge.

She wanted revenge on Tony. Retribution on his company and their weapons. And maybe, more importantly, revenge on the world for what had happened to her family. Her powers were erratic. Terrifying if you wanted to be honest.

After Ultron's true motives had come to light, the twins changed allegiance. Pietro had, unfortunately, died during the battle of Ultron, another member of Wanda's family lost. Yet the girl knew what she wanted to do next. She didn't want revenge for Pietro. Wanda needed to avenge his death. And the best way she could do that was to join the Avengers.

After the unfortunate incident with Wanda's powers, the team had forgiven her. They each understood what it was like to make bad decisions or decisions under duress, and she was a child.

Though you could forgive the girl, it was harder to let go of what she had done to you. Especially since it was not only affecting you but your partners as well.

"And just what do you think you're doing?" Tony asked, causing you to jump.

"Fuck, Tony. You're going to give me a heart attack." You cursed, pressing your and against your chest.

"Aren't I lucky I scared you before you drank that coffee then?" He asked, gesturing to the pot in your hand. "Tell me you aren't going to drink straight from that pot because Steve will kill me for imprinting my 'bad habits' onto you."

"He didn't call it a bad habit, he called it an unhealthy habit." You smiled at him.

"Bad, unhealthy, same thing." Tony shrugged, moving closer and wrapping his arms around your waist. "Don't think I didn't notice you're dodging the question."

"I'm not dodging anything." You denied, putting a hand on his. "I just didn't answer the question."

"Uh-huh," Tony smirked. "You do know it's one in the morning, correct? Coffee isn't really for this time of day."

"Like you can talk." You scoffed, pulling out of his hold. "You drink more coffee than anyone I've ever met." You said as you grabbed a mug, a large one at that.

"That's not true." Tony denied. "Katniss drinks at least two cups more than I do a day." He said, causing you to laugh. "I thought you were asleep with Steve and Nat?"

"I was, and now I'm not." You said, filling the mug to the brim.

"We've been together how long?" Tony asked you.

"Two years, three months if I'm not mistaken. Want a cup?" You raised the pot at him.

"Thanks, babe." Tony nodded. "We've been together for two years, and I don't think I've ever seen you drink black coffee." He commented.

"I've never wanted to stay awake before." You murmured, handing him his mug.

"Are you finally ready to join me as an insomniac?" Tony smirked.

"No, I'm not going to join you. It's just for tonight. I hope." You added the last part quietly.

"Okay, serious talk time," Tony said, putting his mug down. "Talk to me. You've been rattled since Ultron. You can tell me what's going on."

"I don't think I can." You whispered, not looking at him.

"You sneak out of bed without waking Nat or Steve, but you can't tell me this?" Tony asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Exactly." You swallowed harshly. "Please, Tone, don't push me. I can't. Not right now." You whispered, blinking away tears.

"Okay, okay. I won't push." Tony said, moving forward and pulling you into his arms. "I'm here when you're ready. However long that is. Until then you can stay up with me, and we'll watch movies. Drink. Train, whatever you want."

"Can we go to the lab? I wouldn't mind seeing you in your element." You said, looking up at the man.

"That's my girl." Tony smiled. "Come on, I've got some gadgets you can play with."

Non-reader POV

Y/N's one night was a lie. Over the next week, she remained awake, refusing to sleep for longer than an hour a night.

She didn't mention it to anyone, but Tony knew.

Tony also knew who else wasn't sleeping.

"I'm going to have to tell Tasha her games off," Tony commented, leaning against a wall. "If you can sneak out of bed, she's gotta be missing other things."

"Christ, Tony," Steve grunted as he jumped in surprise and was almost hit with the punching bag. "Give a man a little warning."

"I'm getting better at sneaking up on people," Tony smirked, stepping forward. "If memory serves, you have training in four hours. It's not like you to be up at three in the morning."

"Couldn't sleep," Steve admits, going back to hitting the bag. "Been having nightmares."

"I know. It's not just you. I know Nat's been having them, and Y/N too." Tony said, watching the blonde's reactions.

"Really?" Steve asked, stilling the bag for a minute. "How did I not notice that?"

"Well, Y/N has gotten really good at avoiding being caught, and Nat's a spy. Or ex-spy, either way. It's all about timing." Tony commented. "I've programmed JARVIS to let me know when one of you wakes up."

"I'm going to call that sweet because I think it's supposed to be." Steve dryly chuckled.

"It is." Tony nodded. "It's time for me to play the part of the therapist again. I'm getting really good at this lately." He said, stepping towards the man until he was right in front of him. "What's happening in here?" Tony asked, tapping Steve's temple lightly.

"Too much." Steve sighed. "There's too much happening." He repeated, sagging slightly.

"Alright, come on. Sit down and talk with me." Tony said, guiding Steve to a bench. "It'll help you, and it'll help my neck."

"It's because you're so short." Steve managed a smile.

"Okay, I will only allow that because you're sleep-deprived, but you only get one short comment, and you just used it," Tony told him. "Want to tell me about the nightmares? Specifics or otherwise?"

"Not really." Steve murmured, avoiding eye contact. "Don't want anyone to know."

"I'm going to steal a line from my therapist here but, they're just dreams, Stevie. Just dreams. Even if it's a memory, it's still a dream. It can't hurt you unless you let it hurt you." Tony said, taking both the man's hands.

"That sounded really good, Tony. Maybe you should think about becoming a therapist." Steve said after a minute, causing Tony to laugh.

"Yeah, I know I'm the most comforting asshole in this Tower." He chuckled. "Are you sure you don't want to tell me about it?" He asked again.

"Sure. At least for now." Steve told him. "Thank you for being here."

"Of course." Tony smiled before jumping to his feet. "Right, I'm awake, and you're awake. We're in the training room, so let's train. Teach me how to throw a punch." Tony said, making his way to the punching bags.

"With pleasure, Tone." Steve smiled, standing up and standing behind the brunette.

"I know you're there, Tony," Natasha said without turning. "You've gotten better, but you're not that good yet." She added with a small smile.

"I'll keep training. One day I'll get you." Tony commented, standing next to her at the barre. "Should I ask if you'll tell me what's keeping you up?"

"You can." Natasha nodded, continuing her stretching. "But I'm not going to tell you. Not right now."

"Then I won't ask," Tony said, causing her to stop.

"You won't?" She confirmed, raising a perfectly arched eyebrow.

"Nope." Tony verified. "I barely got anything out of Y/N or Steve, I know I won't get anything out of you unless you want to tell me."

"They both think they're so sneaky." Natasha chuckled. "Steve thinks neither of us hears him tripping over shoes and crashing into the wall."

"He's not the most graceful of men." Tony agreed with a fond smile.

"Y/N is better. She takes about five minutes to crawl out of bed and another five to leave the room." Natasha continued. "What a group we are, we all think we're doing so well."

"To be fair, I'm probably doing the best out of all of us," Tony said, raising his hands.

"Tony, you've slept three hours this week," Natasha stated, staring into the man's eyes. "You're not the only one who talks to JARVIS."

"Damn it, J," Tony muttered.

"You haven't been this bad since New York," Natasha said, stepping forward.

"I've never seen the three of you like this." Tony countered. "You've always been the put together ones in this relationship."

"Don't feel so put together now," Natasha mumbled. "I feel like a mess if I'm being honest."

"One of the prettiest messes I've ever seen." Tony smiled, taking her face in his hands.

"I don't like this, Tony," Natasha said, and at that moment, she looked more vulnerable than Tony had ever seen her. "I can get over my normal nightmares easily, but I can't get over this."

"No one's forcing you to 'get over' this, Nat," Tony told her.

"I am," Natasha whispered. "I'm supposed to be stronger than this."

"You are the strongest person I know," Tony said. "And you're one of the bravest. But sometimes you have to let yourself breathe. Sometimes you need to allow yourself to feel fear."

"Maybe you should take over Steves's pre-mission speeches." Natasha laughed, resting her forehead on Tony's.

"Nah, got to give Steve something to do." Tony shook his head, causing the woman to laugh again. "I should leave you to it," Tony said, knowing Natasha wouldn't dance in front of him.

"Tony," Natasha murmured. "Do you want to stay?" She whispered.

"I'd be glad to." Tony smiled, taking a seat on the floor.

Reader POV

"Tony, what's going on?" You asked as he pulled you into your shared bedroom. Where Natasha and Steve were sat on the bed, waiting patiently.

It had been two weeks since you'd last properly slept, and it was currently three in the morning.

"We're all having a meeting." He said, sitting you next to Natasha. "It's been two weeks. None of us have slept in two weeks, and we all know it but haven't acknowledged it."

"We've acknowledged it," Natasha said.

"We just haven't done anything about it." You added.

"And we need to. This is going to sound so hypocritical coming from me, but you're all making yourselves sick." Tony stated. "None of you are sleeping, you're all having nightmares, and you all have unhealthy coping mechanisms."

"You're right, that did sound really hypocritical." Steve nodded.

"And I think I know why." Tony continued as if he hadn't been interrupted. "Wanda played with all of our heads. Showed us our worst nightmares, and we never did anything about it. Never talked about it."

"You want to talk about it?" You asked him slowly.

"Our worst nightmares?" Natasha added.

"I don't know if you understand what that means, Tone." Steve shook his head. "We have been together for a long time. And there's a part of me that thinks if we don't talk about it, we won't be together much longer. I can't lose any of you." Tony admitted.

"Tony's right." Natasha sighed. "Maybe it's time to lighten the load."

You and Steve shared a look before you nodded.

"So, who's going first?" You questioned.

"Wanda showed me what would happen if we lost the war," Steve admitted. "The world was nothing more than ash and rubble. And there were markers on the ground. For Bruce, Thor, Clint, Fury, all of yours. I lost and, then you all lost."

"But Steve, you didn't lose," Natasha assured him, taking his hand. "You won the war."

"There were so many times I could've screwed up though. So many. And I don’t want to be the reason anyone dies.” Steve said, squeezing her hand back. “Who’s next?” He asked after a minute.

“She showed me something similar.” Tony said. “Everyone was dead. Everyone. But you all kept saying I could’ve done more. Should’ve done more. That it was my fault you all died. Because I didn't save you. That’s why I built Ultron. I wanted to protect you all. What a mess of that I made.” He chuckled.

“You didn’t mess anything up.” You said, making him look at you. “You wanted to do the right thing. It just didn’t go the way you wanted and that’s okay.”

“She’s right, Tony.” Steve nodded. “Ultron was a mistake.”

“Okay someone else go, please.” Tony begged.

“Clint brought me to SHIELD, but he never explained how he found me.” You stuttered. “I didn’t know what I was, all I knew was that I hurt people and I couldn’t do that. I was going to kill myself. I had a noose around my neck, and Wanda took me back to that. You were all there, cheering as I hung. No-one came to save me that time.”

“Oh, sweetheart.” Steve cooed, pulling you into his lap. “That would never happen.”

“Absolutely not.” Natasha agreed as she took one of your hands.

“You don’t feel like that anymore do you, Y/N?” Tony asked. “You don’t want to kill yourself?”

“No, I don’t.” You gave him a weak smile. “Haven’t wanted to for two years.”

“I think it’s my turn now.” Natasha sighed after a period of silence. “I was back in the red room. Target practice day. I was alone in the room except for the bagged targets. I knew the rules were to shoot, so I did. The bags were gone by the time the targets fell to the ground and I realized they were you all. I didn’t kill you on accident, I did it because I was following orders. It made me think that I have no place in the world.”

“Your place is here.” Tony said, taking a seat on her other side. “With us.”

“You’re not alone, Nat.” You added, squeezing her hand tightly. “You never have to follow orders like that again.”

“What a group we are.” Steve chuckled humorlessly. “All scared because we didn’t communicate with one another.”

“I blame the sleep deprivation.” You smiled.

“Oh sleep.” Tony groaned. “That word sounds like a forgotten dream.”

“We do still have night hours left.” Natasha commented. “Why not use them to the best of our abilities?”

“Are you sure?” You asked the woman.

“I think we’ve bared our souls enough to finally sleep. And if not, we’re all going to be together.” Natasha reasoned. “I think we’ll be fine.”

“You what, I think you’re right.” Steve smiled. “Tony, Y/N?”

“I’m willing to try.” You said.

“Well then,” Tony stood, clapping his hands. “I think it’s time we get some shut up. JARVIS do not disturb protocol please.” He said as you all became climbing under the covers.

“Of course sir.” Came the reply as you all drifted off.

For the first time in two weeks you all slept through the night, and well into the next day. With no nightmares plaguing any of you.

Remember to ask if you want to be tagged. If you enjoy my writing please consider buying me a coffee.

Taglist

@rvgrsbrns @smilexcaptainx @hopingforbarnes @starlingelliot @piper-koko-barnes-rogers @jelly-fishy-babie @skeletoresinthebasement @agent-barnes40 @reann-loves-sebstan @skadikh @summergeezburr

Natasha Romanoff Taglist

@natasha-danvers @5aftermidnight @ohfuckno

182 notes · View notes

chaotic-yeet · 4 years

Note

every single fucking one yobi

Hey Strawberry, you asked for this

Do you ever doubt anyone else's existence other than your own: Not really no

On a scale of 1-5 how afraid of the dark are you: 5+ I have nyctophobia so it's extremely bad for me

The person you would never want to meet: Does knowing them and no longer speaking count? An old friend of mine, I hope I never see her again

What is your favorite word: I'm actually not sure, I have a few ones I like to say because I pronounce them wrong, but I don't think I have a favorite

If you were a type of tree, what kind would you be: Maybe a birch tree? They're my favorite kind in minecraft sooo

When you looked in the mirror this morning, what did you first think: "Damn I need to wash my face more"

What shirt are you wearing:. A Mammoth one! It's dark gray, has a bear on the back and front chest area, and has blue, pink, and purple fade on it (the bi flag!)

What do you label yourself as: a fuckin bastard or dumbass thats what

Bright room or dark room: I have sensitive eyes so a dark room, but with either soft light or nightlight, I hate complete darkness

What were you doing at midnight last night: Talking to @the-strawzish-clownfish , while being on call with @psychotic-roach he had fallen asleep

Favorite age you've been so far: 13 probably, which sounds weird, but my mental health got better that year (it didn't stay that way but eh)

Who told you they loved you last: @psychotic-roach !! And I love you too (once you read this :D)

Your worst enemy: Myself and an old friend I mentioned in like, question 3

What's your current desktop picture: On my main laptop it's a Marble Hornets fanart (that I adore) and on my Chromebook it's some space doodles in the bi colors

Do you like someone: Fuck yes I do, @psychotic-roach you're fucking great and deserve the world

The last song you listened to: Deku Palace remix! I'm a huge EDM/ Trap fan, combine it with Zelda music and I'm hooked!

You can press a button to make one specific person explode, who would you pick: Old friend from before

Who would you really just love to punch in the face: Many, many people

If anyone could be your slave for the day, who would it be and what would they do: Well probably a close friend of mine, and I'd have him play smash with me and make pancakes with me (basically beg him to hang out even though it's quarantine so we can have fun again)

What's your best physical attribute: Probably my hair, it's dyed purple and used to be shaved

If you were the opposite sex for a day, what would you look like and what would you do: I'd probably look the same just taller and less curves, and I'd probably jerk off or go on some 3am walk because fuck it I can

Do you have a secret talent: I don't think so, I have a shitty memory, but not when it comes to naming ninjago episodes, @the-strawzish-clownfish can verify

What is one unique thing you're afraid of: Touching Rays, any kind, especially the ones at aquariums that come up to the tank wall that you can pet

You can only have one kind of sandwich, every ingredient is at your disposal: Well call me white, but my usual, white bread turkey and shredded cheese. That's it. I'm super lame.

You just found $100 how are you gonna spend it: Save it, I always save hundreds without hesitation

You just got a free plane ticket to go anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately: Uh, probably Georgia to see some family

Basically an Angel says I'll give you lost of booze forever be specific: Uh, fuck I dunno I don't drink, Fuckin' Crown Royal for shits and giggles why not

An island in which you can make your own rules, what's the first: Stay on your own turf unless someone allows you to come in, unless it's emergency (and I know this rule will cause problems, it's a guideline at best)

What is your favorite expletive: Tie between Bullshit and Fuck, I absolutely love those two

Your house is on fire (but everyone is okay) what one object do you grab: Well, in my current room right now? My phone, I'll still have contact with people I love and have my art (the only thing I care about in here) with me too

You can erase any horrible experience from your past: Main one, I won't actually say allowed but Roach you know what it is, but one I can put on here, Probably some embarrassing thing I did, most like everyone else

You got kicked out of your country, where would you live: GERMANY! I love the German language and I'd absolutely love to go to Germany and live with it!

Death is a good dude and says you can choose who to bring back: My cat who died a few years ago, he was an awesome cat that didn't deserved to die at 6 years old

What was your last dream about: I have super long dreams, like so much goes on in them it's like a story, too long to type out, @psychotic-roach knows it. Long story short, Pirates and apartments under water

Are you a good (insert whatever): Am I a good, fuck I dunno let's do artists because it's easy. I think I do decent enough

Have you ever been admitted to the hospital: No, only when I was a newborn in the nicu because I wasn't latching right

Have you ever built a snowman: Nope, but my friend did and I watched. His snowman was tiny and got stepped on, my friend shed a few tears

What is the color or your socks: Not wearing any right now, but usually gray

What type of music do you like: EDM AND TRAP BABYYY IF IT'S LOUD I LOVE IT

Do you prefer sunrise or sunset: Sunset definitely, I burn easy so having the nice night air slowly come over with the stars is nice for me

Favorite milkshake flavor: Chocolate!

What football team do you support: American football? None. German Bundesliga teams? Stuttgart. We were assigned teams in my German class and that was mine! Stuttgart all the way!!

Do you have any scars: Yes, many. They range from self harm, to actual cat scratches, to me falling, and many more

What do you want to be when you graduate: No idea!

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Weight, I have bad self esteem so it's never enough

Are you reliable: Honestly, no. I have bad memory and I will forget if someone needs something

If you could ask your future self a question what would it be: How's Roach doing, and what's Oregon like?

Do you hold grudges: depends, mostly no, but sometimes yes

If you could breed two animals together and defy the laws of nature, what two would you breed: Uh good question, probably Cat and Opossum, really just to see what would happen

Most unusual conversation: Mental health stuff with my parents and therapist, more awkward than anything

Are you a good liar: Not really no depending on the person

How long could you go without talking: Well in quarantine all day, regular days though, maybe an hour at best, I absolutely love my friends, just only certain ones

What has been your worst haircut/ style: Back when it was longer than my shoulders and I wore it down. Except I never took care of it so it looked like shit.

Have you ever baked your own cake: Yes every birthday I make mine! I even had my friends help me with my most recent one!

Can you do any accent other than your own: maybe a southern one but no not really

What do you like on your toast: Nutella or cinnamon and sugar. I know, terrible for you

What is the last thing you drew a picture of: Uh me and @psychotic-roach and our pets but I'm self conscious about my art so I just didn't really show it to anyone (sorry Roach, I'm just super shy about my art!)

What would be your dream car: Me and my family had a running joke that I liked Tesla's, so probably a Tesla

Do you sing in the shower: No but I want to, I just don't like people hearing me sing

Do you believe in aliens: I believe we're not alone in the universe, weather it be new life billions of miles away or way advanced life a few galaxies away

Do you often read your horoscope: No, but astrology is fun to fuck with sometimes

What is your favorite letter of the alphabet: probably E or something, it's soothing in a weird way

Dinosaurs or dragons: DRAGONS DRAGONS I LOVE DRAGONS I'M A HUGE HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON NERD!!!

What do you think about babies: They're sweet sometimes, I'm honestly afraid of holding one or having to take care of one though

Freebie! Ask anything you can think of: I can't really think of anything so I guess just @psychotic-roach I love you!! @the-strawzish-clownfish thank you for these painful asks, they were fun :)

#strawberry ask

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starlight-drive-in · 5 years

Text

All My Life, for You - Ch. 4: The Enemy of My Enemy

Fic Description: Mi-Cha and Saeyoung have been happily married for 5 years and their lives have never been happier. The same could be said for Saeran who is now in a much healthier place than he was a few years ago. The twins are close once again, their lives are healthy and normal for the most part. It would seem the picture perfect happily ever after, if it weren’t for the fact that someone who has been looking for them for a long time is about to make an unwelcome appearance.

Saeyoung has two things in this world he has sworn to protect, and nothing is going to stop him from keeping his promise this time.

Relationships: Saeyoung Choi/MC (named), Saeran Choi/OC

Chapter Description: Things ramp up a bit here, anxiety, worrying, and being paranoid for everyone! Still, there are soft moments. Hope you enjoy!

AO3 Link | First Chapter

Bassy music thumps loudly as Saeran enters the nightclub, hastily flashing his forged ID at the doorman. This is the last place he thought he’d end up tonight but if it gives him a chance of throwing whoever that man is off his trail then he’s happy to play along. He’s not really dressed for clubbing, seeing as he was originally planning on just going hiking tonight. His t-shirt and shorts don’t stick out per se, but they don't exactly help him blend in with all the trendy black and neon he’s currently surrounded by.

Fortunately for him, there seem to be quite a few people in here that are a good deal taller than him. With a quick glance over his shoulder, he verifies the man hasn't managed to follow him in yet . He’s not taking any chances. These types of people don’t give up easily. Especially if they are under the command of someone powerful - he knows that all too well.

He shudders; anxiety building as he wanders into the crowd, specifically trying to stay behind people taller and larger than him. He glances at the door again, still nothing. His eyes dart nervously around the room hoping his discomfort won't be noticeable enough to make him stand out.

You’re going to have to be a bit more convincing than that. He hears Unknown say in his head as his hips begin to move in time to the music against his own will. He groans outwardly as a familiar headache begins to settle in.

Somehow he finds himself in a group of three or four other club-goers, definitely blending in now despite the embarrassment that overcomes him the moment he realizes what’s going on. At least Saeyoung isn't here right now to see this or he’d never let him live it down.

Just as he’s entertaining that thought he sees him - the same figure as before - enter the club and begin scanning the crowd. Saeran ducks behind one a tall man in front of him, which he realizes must look like a very strange dance move but he doesn't have much of a choice right now. Luckily the few people he was apparently dancing with don't seem to notice or care about his timely departure. He watches as the man’s eyes settle on a woman sitting at the bar who seems to be flagging him down, he walks up to her and they embrace and then both sit down.

Saeran feels like a fool. Did he make the whole thing up? Was the guy not really following him and just happened to be behind him? He walks a little closer to get a better look at him. He’s pretty positive this is the same guy but this guy’s not even paying attention to the rest of the crowd, in fact, he already has a hand on his date’s thigh as they are obviously in some type of ‘personal discussion’.

He knows his paranoia and anxiety can sometimes play tricks on him. Is that really all it was? Did he simply let his imagination run wild? He feels deflated, tricked somehow almost. His panic was even enough to cause his alter to come out. He realizes his next therapy session is going to have to be about tonight. He groans again.

It had been a good day, a great day actually. He was feeling quite carefree after talking with Jisun in the restaurant, excited even. She had been easy to talk to in ways most people aren't, it was refreshing but then this happened. Why did this have to happen?

He tries to talk himself down, it’s not that big of a deal right? So what, he got a little paranoid. He didn’t lash out at anyone or cause a scene. He’ll never even see these people again. But what if it wasn’t just paranoia? What if something really was up and that guy just had a cover? What if that guy wasn’t the guy from before?

His mind runs in circles as he walks back to the hotel, glancing behind him every few strides. He takes his phone out to check the time, he has no idea how long he was in there - it’s dead.

“Shit.” He says under his breath. He hates losing track of time the way he does when a switch happens. It’s been so long he forgot how uncomfortable it makes him. He must have been in there awhile. He feels guilty, Saeyoung and Mi-Cha are probably worried about him. He doesn’t know what he’s going to tell them yet. He doesn’t want to worry them, especially if it was just a trick of his anxiety. Honestly, He doesn’t want to tell them about the switch either. As much as he tries not to be ashamed of his disorders, he still feels like he’s failing somehow when things like this happen. He should call his therapist in the morning.

“Why isn’t he back yet?” Saeyoung laments as he paces the few steps across the hotel room again, laptop in hand displaying the CCTV feed from the hallway.

Mi-Cha checks her phone for a reply message to the text she sent 30 minutes ago. Nothing. She watches her husband’s panic empathetically, worried for her brother-in-law as well.

“This isn't like him at all, he always tells us if he’s going to be out this late.” Saeyoung says, exasperated.

“Maybe things with that girl went better than expected?” MC says hopefully. It would be nice if her brother-in-law met someone who understood him, and he really did seem to be hitting it off with her when they spotted him earlier.

“But his phone is off.” He says, earning an eyebrow raise from his wife as he sets down the computer.

“You know he doesn’t like it when you track him like that.” She responds, already knowing exactly how exactly he knows that.

“I know, I know,” Saeyoung says holding his hands up in surrender “I haven't done it in a really long time I swear, but I can't shake the feeling that something’s wrong.” He stops pacing for a moment to look down at the street from their window. “If he’s not back in 30 more minutes I’m going full reconnaissance mode.”

She knows he means it too.“You might want to put some pants on first.” Mi-Cha giggles, springing up from the bed and grabbing him a pair of his sweat pants from the dresser, tossing them at him where he’s now managed to sit for a second at the hotel room’s desk.

His reaction time is usually pretty quick but a second later there he sits with his pants draped unceremoniously over his head as he stares intently at his screen, tapping at the keys vigorously. He must be really worried Mi-Cha thinks to herself as she goes to remove the pants from her husband's head, and instead drapes them neatly over his shoulder.

“His phone’s metadata says his last location was some nightclub, not far from where he was having dinner,” Saeyoung says thoughtfully as he pulls up the location on a satellite map.

“Maybe he and that girl went there?” She says somewhat doubtful, resting her head atop Saeyoung’s as she watches his screen and tries to picture the site of her brother-in-law in a nightclub.

“Saeran, willingly in a nightclub? My brother, Saeran?” Saeyoung asks her, matching her doubtful tone. “I mean yea that girl was pretty cute but-”

“Yea I know. That is highly unlikely. ” MC sighs, backstepping away from Saeyoung and falling onto the bed. She compulsively checks her phone again. Still, nothing, not like that is anything surprising.

“He’s back!” Saeyoung exclaims, pushing his chair back with such ferocity that it topples over backward hitting the floor with a thud.

MC glances at the laptop screen, sure enough, the very familiar form of Saeran is making his way down the hall from the elevators, hands in his pockets as he scans the numbers on the doors in search of his own. The sound of the door being unlocked snaps her attention away from the screen.

“Saeyoung! Pants!” She calls out before he can open the door.

“Right, right, right.” He frantically mutters as he stumbles back to his discarded sweat pants near the chair and hurriedly pulls them, tying the drawstring as he exits.

He shuts the door with a divisive click as he meets Saeran at the door across the hall.

Relief floods his system as his eyes settle on his brother. “Hey.” Saeyoung chokes out, suddenly feeling a bit overwhelmed as his adrenaline begins to fizzle out.

“Hey, sorry I’m back so late. I didn’t keep you guys up did I?” Saeran responds, still feeling guilty he was out so late and didn't even really know it.

“Nah, you’re good. We were… up.” Saeyoung says a bit awkwardly as he tries to cover himself.

“Mmm,” Saeran hums, “Is that why you’re not wearing a shirt?” he jabs, a sly smile breaking his unsureness.

“What? No, no we were just-” Saeyoung starts.

“I’m kidding. Thanks for waiting up for me.” Saeran mumbles as he scans his key card, disengaging the door’s lock. He stands in the open door for a moment, unsure whether or not to invite his brother in for awhile. “Hope I didn’t make you worry too much?”

“Of course,” Saeyoung says slowly, undecided on how much to elaborate on exactly how worried he had been. “You’re my brother, I’m always worried about you.”

Saeran huffs out a smile as he’s reminded how very wrong he had been about his brother all those years ago. He steps back, allowing room for his brother to come in after all. “You coming in?” He offers.

“Yea!” Saeyoung replies, excitedly accepting his twin’s invitation and hurrying into the room.

Once the door is shut again, Saeran kicks off his shoes and pushes them to the side before padding over to the nightstand to plug in his dead phone.

“So... “ Saeyoung starts. “What'd ya do tonight?”

Saeran eyes him suspiciously on his way into the bathroom. “Went for a hike earlier. Then dinner” He says as he washes his hands and opens his contact case, popping out one minty-blue contact and placing it in its appropriate side.

Saeyoung leans against the door frame “And you met a girl?” Saeyoung asks, already knowing the answer.

Saeran inhales sharply “How did you know that?” He says in an accusatory tone turning to Saeyoung.

Saeyoung jerks back for second at his brothers offended tone as Saeyoung’s gold eyes stare into that of brothers, one its usual but unnatural color, and the other the exact one Saeyoung is used to seeing in the mirror. “M-Mi-Cha and I saw you guys on our way home! I wasn’t spying on you she just happened to notice you. It seemed like you were having a good time?”

“Oh,” Saeran says shortly, realizing he’s still a bit on edge. “Yea that makes sense. Yea? She kinda just came and sat down next to me and started chatting with me, seemed like a nice girl.” He finishes whilst popping out his remaining contact and replacing them with seldom seen dark-rimmed glasses.

“I can’t believe my little brother got hit on!” and just like that Saeyoung is back to his regular self. “They grow up so fast.” he cries while wiping fake tears from his eyes.

“And why is that so hard to believe?” Saeran says in a lighter tone this time, almost thankful for the teasing that makes things feel normal again.

“I’m just kidding, I mean you’re my twin so obviously you’re an absolute cutie!” He says while enthusiastically throwing a hand over his brothers’ shoulder and finger-gunning at their combined reflections in the bathroom mirror.

Saeran rolls his eyes as he pinches Saeyoung’s pointer finger between his own index finger and thumb, and plucks Saeyoung’s hand off of him like a dirty sock, letting it fall back to his brothers side with a comical slap.

"So do you like her? Do you think she's cute?" Saeyoung rattles off.

"What?!" Saeran responds. His brother can be so upfront it's jarring. "No! I mean. Yea but…"

"Yes!" Saeyoung cheers as if he just won a prize or something.

"I only talked to her for like 20 minutes, that's not enough to know if you like someone." Saeran defends.

"Ok but." Saeyoung pauses dramatically. "What if it was?"

Saeran pushes past him, back into the room and turns his charging phone back on before flopping down on the bed and staring up at the ceiling.

Saeyoung follows, "So what's her name?" He interrogates.

"Jisun." Saeran gives in, knowing this will be over faster if he just gives his brother what he wants.

"Cute! What's her last name?"

"I didn't ask."

"Ok, but you have her number right? You're turning on your phone right now to let her know you got back safe?" Saeyoung asks hopefully.

Saeran groans as he makes the realization that he indeed does not have Jisun's number.

"You didn't get it did you?" Saeyoung says, an almost disappointment in his voice.

"No, I forgot. I was having such a good time talking to her, but she had to go help friends and I completely forgot to ask."

"Well, that's ok! We can find her! Where's your laptop? How many Jisun's could there be vacationing here right now?" Saeyoung glances around the room before seeing Saeran's black laptop on the dresser and quickly picks it up.

Before he can open it though, it's already left his hands, Saeran having snatched it away from him, letting it fall haphazardly on the bedspread. "No." Is all he says.

"No? Don't you wanna see her again? Come on, between the two of us we'll know what she ate for breakfast all last week within the hour."

“I said no.” Saeran looks his brother directly in the eyes. “I don’t want to do that kind of thing again. If I’m meant to see her again I will.”

“But, but what if you don’t see her again?” Saeyoung asks wide-eyed.

“Then it wasn’t meant to be.” Saeran says simply.

“Wow, I didn't think you believed in fate.” Saeyoung wonders.

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. All I know is that if I’m going to meet someone I want it to be natural, not manufactured or forced.” He says with purpose in his voice, “I’ve learned that much at least.” He says quietly.

Saeyoung stands stunned for a minute, a feeling of pride overtaking him. His brother’s wisdom is enlightening. “You’re right. Sorry I tried to push it.” Saeyoung apologizes.

“S’fine, don’t worry about it.” Saeran brushes it off.

“I hope you see her again though,” Saeyoung says. “She’s pretty, and you seemed comfortable with her.”

“She is. I was, she was... really easy to talk too.” Says thoughtfully, looking off to the side momentarily.

“Well, that’s new.” Saeyoung notes. His brother hated chit-chat, who was this girl? He wants to ask more, to find out why he was at that club, but he knows pushing Saeran for answers is never a good idea. Especially if it comes across as Saeyoung suspecting him of something. No, he’s pushed he luck enough for tonight.

Saeran checks his phone while Saeyoung seems to be pondering something. He has 2 texts from himself? But he’s not in his own phonebook so the text chat window only displays “Unknown”. Oh, I see, how clever. He thinks to himself. His therapist had suggested that he try to communicate with his alter via a journal, or something similar. It was strange to see Unknown was the first to take the suggestion.

Unknown: Something’s not right. Watch our back.

Unknown: and… let the red-head know...

He stares at the two messages, flabbergasted, to say the least. He wants him to let Saeyoung know? This was quite the development. Every time Unknown took consciousness since leaving Mint Eye had ended up one of three ways; ignoring Saeyoung completely, getting away from him as fast as possible (usually by taking one of Saeyoung’s cars), or lashing out at him. The latter hasn't happened in years now thankfully. Still, he wouldn't have thought Unknown to have become soft enough to actually want Saeyoung’s help. He suddenly remembers a saying ‘ The enemy of my enemy is my friend.’ Maybe that's what Unknown is getting at? Well, it wasn't like he could text his alter back and ask him about it.

“I guess I should get back to Mi-Cha.” Saeyoung says after some time has passed in silence, approaching the door, “Night bro!” he calls from the doorway.

“Saeyoung wait!” Saeran calls after him. “There’s something I have to talk to you about.”

___________ I'm going to admit, Unknown wasn't even supposed to be in this fic in the beginning but he has a mind of his own. Writing Saeran is like a box of chocolates, you never know which one you're gonna get! (I'll show myself out).

#mystic messenger #mystic messenger fanfic #saeyoung choi #saeran choi #saeyoung choi/mc #mm saeyoung #mm saeran #Luciel Choi #mm luciel #mm 707 #mm seven #mm unknown #mm fanfiction #saeran choi/oc

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rasmot-corner · 7 years

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Mental Health update: Awareness and trying to deal with being aware

Again, i am putting this under a read more. Same drill as last time. If you didn’t read the previous entry about this, then the link will be right here.

http://rasmot-corner.tumblr.com/post/165029843217/metal-health-update-depression

Feel free to read through if you want . . . it’s your call on that really.

So it’s Mental Health day . . . or something like that i think. Which i’m not knocking at all! That’s actually a good thing that there is a day for that. Didn’t even know there was one to be fully honest . . . but that’s neither here nor there. I’ve learned a few things since the last time so i kinda figured i should get it out into the open.

I am fairly sure along with my Depression that i also have Anxiety. Or something close to it.

I know this because a while back i actually had a mini-panic attack. It was over something small . . . really incredibly small. It wasn’t “forgot milk” small but it wasn’t a major thing either. However i asked around and it was verified that it was pretty much a panic attack. Shortness of breath/hard time breathing. Pain in the center of the chest where the heart is. And just an overwhelming sense of dread. It went away, and i haven't had anything since then but . . . well i’m also sort of prone to shattering as well.

I want to say a few weeks, close to a month later i also had another small episode. This time due to some rather . . . poor thinking on the part of my mother, i ended up breaking down, pretty much to tears. Mostly because i thought she was angry at me after telling her to be careful when it looked like she would accidentally run into another car with the car we were in. And i hate those situations to the death of me. Hell i hate most driving in general. I don’t like how close together cars can be while driving anywhere. And even when people are absolute asses or dicks about anything. I am absolutely terrified to get behind the wheel because of how close to death one can get in an instant. So to have someone yell “I know what i’m doing!” when it looks like we’re about to hit someone all just to get home faster to get things done . . . yeah, doesn’t do much for my mental state.

And on top of this i have sort of . . . mini-episodes whenever my father uses the word “dumbass” in reference to myself. It’s a typical and constant thing he says. I understand that part. But it still fills me with dread and self loathing whenever he does use it or say it.

Okay . . . maybe i can probably add some form of PTSD to the . . . eh “amateur mental problem spotter” list thing i have going on here. However i’m not sort of “sitting on my ass” as it were. I’ve started drinking a different type of tea, something closer to a Matcha blend, which has been helping me a lot actually. And i’ve also got a few things in mind and have been trying to get a job or some work to get some money. It’ll take a while and some effort, i know. But i know some good will come of it. It’s just on this day . . . I’m both terrified and thankful.

Five days from now i am going to be turning 28. Eight is my sorta “lucky number” and i am actually a little happy i have gotten to this point. I know. That sounds horrendous. How can one be happy that they’ve gotten to 28??? that should be a normal standard thing. Well for me . . . dealing with all the near brushes with death and all the instances of well . . . crippling depression and anxiety. Being able to say “Hey i lived for 28 years” is something i can take some pride in now.

But the fear comes in “What do i do now” when looking forwards. Not every number with an 8 in it is very lucky. And i know that bad things could happen round the bend. Even then i still have to take into consideration the fact that i do need PROFESSIONAL help. A therapist or some form of medication at the very least. I cannot keep living the way i have. I cannot continue to deal with close brushes with insanity, moments where i could become “un-muzzled” as it were, or even moments where i instantly shatter to pieces at even the smallest of things. I need help. I know this. It’s just getting it in a state that doesn’t know what the fuck to even DO about that, that worries me. Especially with these troubling times that just add more fuel for Carl to constantly badger me with.

However. I won’t let this beat me. I can’t let this beat me. I have people i care about who need my help, and whom i want to be there for when they feel down. I have things i want to do, places i want to go. My biggest dream, is to one day return to Japan or see Greece for the very first time and be able to remember it. I want to return “home” in a sense. I want to see the Sakura trees. Hear the Cicada in the summer. Listen to the automated female voice of the trains that can take you almost anywhere. I want to smell the salts of the sea. Hear the songs of tradition. Be able to walk up to the Parthenon and place my hand on history. And i would love to be able to do these things with my closest friends or someone to just have with me at my side.

Thinking about these things has made me a little weepy . . . but i know that one day, if i put effort into it, if i try, if i continue to work at my story and anything else i want to do. One day i will get there.

I just have to make sure i don’t get stuck in the muck from the rain threatening to drown me in my blast channels for my personal rocket.

#Rasmot #Mental Health #Depression #and Anxiety #a deadly cocktail #but also a common one #with a garnish of some PTSD #World Mental Health Day #also birthday soon #yaaaay

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heartfeltheart · 4 years

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Alchemy: Tiny Steps

Chapters: 38/45 Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist/Harry Potter Rating: T Relationships: Edward/Winry, Lan Fan/Ling, and May/Alphonse. Primary Characters: Edward Elric, Severus Snape Additional Tags: Crossover, Teacher!Edward, BrOtp Edward/Severus. Sassy beyond measure. Pro!Snape Series: Part 2 of 9. Summary: Part two of the Alchemy Series. Politics. Either you love it, hate it or you live it. For Alchemy Teacher Edward Elric, he lives it, hates it and loves it when he gets the upper hand. Here is to another year of hell… D/C: I do not own Harry Potter or Fullmetal Alchemist. Discord: La Red(Mesh Mash of… stuff.): https://discord.gg/KYjmVAb Alchemy Series: https://discord.gg/DejEYNJ

Warning: I apologize ahead of time, I do not know how to write a character with PTSD.

"I don't want to go!"

"Shut up."

"Make me! Let go of my ear!"

"Stop acting liking a child."

"No! Let go!"

"…"

"Please."

"No."

Edward pouted, he didn't want to deal with Sirius Black any more than Severus does. However, with how things are going… nothing is going well for any of them. "The guy doesn't even like me. He tried to throttle me."

"Which you proceeded to knock him out in one punch."

"You had to admit, the guy had it coming."

"True. He is still stuck in the past."

"I guess we'll have to use an ancient technique to knock some sense into him."

"…Does it have to do with physical violence?"

"Yes, of course. You will not believe how it works with his type."

Severus couldn't help but smirk at the notion of having Edward beat Black once more to a bloody pulp. He shook his head of that and continued with their schedule of their day. "Lupin and Madam Bones requested us to speak to Black before his therapist and the social worker."

"Why?"

"He wants…ugh… he wants to know if I blackmailed or brainwashed you into convincing the court to place several regulations before the notion of having his god-son placed into his care."

"...Is this man deluded?"

"I ask myself that question every day…"

"Typical… Seems like I'm going to have to beat some sense into him. I do not have time for this, I have to plan the winter trip back to Amestris for my class."

"That is still on? Even with what is occurring between Amestris and Drachma?"

"Yeah. Alphonse called, he said that the guy we were supposed to hand over that journal is dead but taught his grandson how to crack the code." Edward grinned, contentment filled within him at the news. So far, there is a standstill until the kid cracks the entire journal and it is already showing great strides in doing so. So far… several oil paintings were found along with a sculpture of a famous opera singer from Drachma that was born in that small town near Briggs. "You want to know the funny part about it?"

"Hm?"

"The kid goes to a magical school in Norway. Apparently, that school teaches Alchemy in a lower level than at Amestris and but is miles ahead from here."

-.-

Sirius grumbled under his breath, wondering how his life seemed to want to screw him over repeatedly. His personal issues with his family, friends, people he thought as friends, and people in general. He's pretty much back where he was back in that retched prison. Alone.

Stuck in his childhood home with no one to talk to. He wasn't even allowed to have a wand yet, as there is a fear he would do something that would cause him to go back. No flue powder for the same reason. The whole aura of the place wasn't helping his mood either. It makes Sirius wonder if he was back there… in that tiny cell… alone with his thoughts…

With a snarl, Sirius grabbed hold of the coffee table and flung it across the room. The sound of glass crushing, and wood splintering filled the room, along with the heavy breathing of the only living human in that so-called home. For him, it only brought along a moment of sound that he needed. He needed more noise, something to fill in the silence. Anything. If he had to fill this entire place with sound…that wasn't his mother's constant screaming, then maybe he'll won't go mad.

"SHUT UP YOU OLD HAG!"

-.-

Alphonse looked through the notes that his father left behind to be deciphered by his friend for future use. He was asked by the man's grandson to help decode them and it is proving to be rather insightful to see his father's work outside of the office…and not causing mayhem. Said grandson ended up being a thirteen-year-old that goes to a magical school and appears to be rather excited at finally fulling his grandfather's work. His name is Ivan from what Alphonse been told and was not told last name for fear of Amestris hunting down the kid.

Silly but true notion, still, Ivan reminds Alphonse of himself and Edward a lot from their own time whenever they found something excited about Alchemy.

"I found the location of a... tomb? Of a princess? Mr. Elric, could you verify this?"

-.-

"This is why I wanted him checked over…" Edward whispered to Severus as both men entered Grimmauld Place. The entire place was trashed, wallpaper teared off the walls, furniture thrown against the walls and some didn't even survive the crash. There was a woman screaming on the top of her lungs, screaming about her pathetic son and how a muggle even dared to enter her home. The sad part about it all… everything looked like it matched the eeriness of the Place. Both men could hear someone is upstairs throwing around furniture and other random items.

"Muggle… no… you're something else… what brings you here to my mistress home."

Edward and Severus turned their head to see an old House-Elf, glaring at them from down the hall.

Edward pulled out a couple of crackers from his lunch earlier. "Crackers? You look like you need them for having to deal with the idiot upstairs."

"Are you trying to bribe him with food?" Severus raised an eyebrow at Edward, not actually believing what he was seeing in front of him.

"Hey, from what I have seen from pure-bloods, they treat their house-elves like shit. I am trying to be respectful when I entire their home. Why? Did you want them instead?"

"…"

-.-

Not once in his entire time he ever lived in 12 Grimmauld Place, did Sirius ever hear music fill the entire Place in such rhythm. Sure, they enchanted instruments to play themselves, but never to this caliber. This time, the music feels… relaxing and it's starting to fill his mind with noise. Much appreciated noise…

The close Sirius got closer to the music, he started to hear voices coming from downstairs. He recognized one of them, Severus Snape. The other one is one he only heard just recently, Edward Elric. It sounds like…they are arguing?

"If only I still had my alchemy, it would make fixing things so much easier. I'll have Alphonse do something once he gets back to show you!"

"Why not the General or Major?"

"And deal with their own brand of stupidity? No."

"The doctor?"

"He's more of a scholarly type alchemist… He avoids doing alchemy when he has to."

"Ah… What about that one man you once told me? The one with the long ridiculous name?"

"Scar? His religion is opposed to Alchemy."

"… The princess?"

"She does something completely different."

"…Anyone else?"

"…There is Teacher… but that is highly dangerous…"

"The one that set a bear off on you?"

"Yes."

"Young Elric… I got the… tools you requested." Kreacher?

"Thanks, 'Reacher. This should do, we'll call if we need anything else."

Sirius curiosity got the better of him and walked down the stairs. Why were they here at Grimmauld?

"Why did they place Sirius here? It looks like shit, feels like shit, and so on. No offense to 'Reacher."

"He's currently in-house arrest, people are still skeptical about him and is kept here for everyone's safety, including himself. Including that of his god-son, we do not want him to accidentally reveal where he is located at."

"Of course, sucks though…"

"…You're planning something…"

"You know me so well."

"Could someone explain to me why you two are in my home?" Sirius made his presence known to Snape and Elric.

"I don't know, I was forced here."

Smack.

"Oi! Stop doing that!"

"Once you stop acting like an idiot, perhaps."

"Ugh! Why are we even best friends again?"

"We both enjoy torturing our students and firewhiskey."

"Oh right… hee-hee, torture."

-.-

"I swear… he hates us."

"How much?"

"It's still up in debate."

"He can't expect us to finish all of this work before he comes back!"

"I think I'm losing my mind…"

"We lost that a long time ago…"

-.-

"Yeah… torture. Seriously, why are we here? Why couldn't they assign someone else to this? He doesn't like you, and I'm not exactly his more favorite person right now?" Edward questioned Severus with an eyebrow raised. Sirius copied his expression towards the Potion's Master as well, wondering that himself.

"There's a full moon tonight, other wise Lupin would be here. Apparently, the Ministry are using him as a test subject for a newer version of the Wolfsbane Potion. So far…there's been soaring reviews… Everyone else… they are not connected well enough with the Muggle world help with Black." Severus coughed into his hand when he said the word, muggle. Edward hates the word and is currently roughly sanding a chair at the mention of said word. "Mr. Elric," "Really, Severus? Back to last names?" "Has made several calls and found someone to be your personal therapist."

"A therapist?" Sirius face scrunched up at the word. "What in bloody hell is that?"

"They help you. In your' case, Ms. Hammond will help you transition from prison life to civilian life…and make sure this does happen again." Edward lifted up what appeared to use to be a coffee table. "Can't have you destroying everything in your path again."

"Oh, come on! Is one of your rules you had on me! You made them do this to me, Snape! Is that it!" The world around Sirius seemed to be growing smaller by the minute. His eyes kept darting everywhere, trying to look for an exit or a way to figure out what they are saying to him. He didn't have a problem. No problem. Just needed a way to fill the silence. Something to occupy himself. That was it. Just a one-time thing. Why do they think he has a problem? Are the purposely trying to keep Harry away from him! Don't they know the danger he is in Lily's sister's care!

Edward slowly reached over and grabbed hold of Severus shoulder to give Sirius more room. "Let's give him room… look's like he is going to explode."

"I take it you have experience in…this sort of thing?"

"Afraid so... Sirius? Would you like us to leave? We need to grab some items to fix this place up for you and Harry…" Edward said in a low calming voice to Sirius, maintaining eye contact with the man. "Would you like me to put on another record? Something more upbeat? Music?"

"…Th… that… that would be nice…" Sirius physically deflated, music will fill his mind for now. The place does need a change of look…

-.-

Arty Fuchs waved at his co-worker dropped a couple of files on his desk before they walked out, closing the door behind themselves. Just what he needed, more work. He reached under his desk and pulled a lever he had underneath there to reveal a secret compartment. Reaching into said secret compartment, Arty pulled out a file that needed his immediate attention.

It's the file of the infamous Harry Potter, the case no one wants to take on. It wasn't because the kid was horrible or anything, it's his current guardians and the higher ups that seemed to want him permanently placed there until further noticed.

"They are proper people, there is nothing wrong with them."

"It's clear the child…is anything but normal."

'Anything but normal my arse… Money is the only reason that blasted family is keeping the poor kid. Just wait until he's of age, he'll sue them for misuse of his family's money.' Arty thought to himself as he looked through Harry Potter's file. Not only was it a muggle issue, it was a magical issue. Sure, the muggle side of him wants to take that kid out of the situation but he also has to think about the charm he has over him. Before the kid could even be moved elsewhere, he has to make sure said location is safe enough to be moved into. The Black's place seems more than an adequate place for Harry to placed into, but… as of right now, his god-father does not meet the criteria. First thing first, he has to make sure where the kid is going to stay is up to standard, ensuring it is a healthy environment and so on. No way is he going to allow personal bias going to interfere with any of it. 'What time is it? Hm… it's almost time for me to meet with Sirius Black.'

-.-

"I still say we get the light blue paint with black or dark blue accents."

"We have to make the place seem…ugh… welcoming."

"…yellow? Green?"

"He won't stand for green, Black is a Gryffindor in a family of Slytherins."

"…Yellow and white?"

"It'll look like Easter puked all over the place."

"Then you pick!" Edward leaned into the cart he was pushing around the hardware store in defeat. He and Severus have been arguing about the color scheme for the entry hallway and main sitting room. "I prefer the look of wood and painted white walls. Simple. Rustic."

"Never pegged you for a country boy." Severus mused, he picked out some paint samples and wondered which ones worked together.

"I grew up in a farming community, we didn't have much but…it was more than enough." Edward eyes glazed over at the memories of his childhood home. So many memories, good and bad. "Mother loved flowers, she had painted them on tiles and stick them around the kitchen. I think I saved a few… hm."

"…What were her favorite?"

"Myosotis sylvatica, forget-me-not."

"Could you two get a move on, you're both taking up the entire room here!"

Severus and Edward turned their heads to see a… man that pretty much occupied the entire aisle with his size. He was glaring at the two with his beady eyes, judgingly. The man muttered under his breath about how strange and rude they are, going out in public in such manner, whatever that means to Edward. Then the Alchemy Teacher heard a loud squawk from behind the walrus of a man, and out popped a woman wearing a ridiculous salmon colored hat, her eyes bulging out at the sight of Severus.

Severus in turn, raised an eyebrow at the woman. His eyes held recognition and mainly annoyance. He wasn't wearing his typical wizarding garb as he was currently in muggle London, opting for a buttoned up black long sleeve shirt, black pants and leather shoes. He had on a thick dark green peacoat that was left unbuttoned. How Edward managed to get hold of his muggle clothes, the Potion's Master still has no clue, consider how the younger male prefers clothing that was more…traditional. "…Petunia…"

"You know them?"

"Unfortunately."

-.-

Harry attempted to make himself as unnoticeable as possible. Aunt Petunia, Uncle Vernon and Dudley had planned to go to a fair, Mrs. Figg wasn't available to babysit him, so he had to tag along with strict rules. After leaving the fair, Aunt Petunia said she wanted to repaint the kitchen and wanted paint samples.

It resulted with the ten-year-old to duck around the aisles to avoid being seen by anyone and by his cousin, who currently is hunting him down to hit him. It came to a stop when he took a quick turn smacked into someone. He gulped, the color on his face drained when a man with hair that was nearly identical to gold with matching eyes looked down at him with questioning eyes. "So-sorry…"

The golden eyed man raised an eyebrow at him but didn't say anything. He grabbed hold of his friend and strolled over towards the cash registers. The man did however wink at him, along with a smirk. Looking back at his relatives to see that they had no color left in their faces. From shock or fright, it is unknown to Harry.

-.-

"…So that was Harry Potter?" Edward murmured under his breath to Severus, eyes calculating as he took in the information.

"Yes." Severus confirmed.

"Now I am starting to understand why Sirius wants him out of there."

"There is so much we can do from this point on. Even if we want him out of there, Dumbledore remains adamant on making sure he remains there."

"Typical."

"How did you get your hands on Pott-"

"Harry. The kid's name is Harry. Your beef is with his dad, not him. Until it is revealed the kid is a complete and utter brat, then you may act like he's a stuck-up a-hole."

"…Ugh… How did you found out they were embezzling Harry's inheritance?"

"So close… You'd be surprised how loose lipped some people are… and the walrus never kept quiet about his endeavors. There is no way in Truth's Name the guy can afford up to four flashy vacations on his payroll and in that company, and still afford to get his kid in a pricey private school." Edward shifted the paper bag he was carrying to his other arm, feeling right arm was going numb for caring it. "I have been placed on this case and I plan to see it through."

"And messing with Dumbledore?" Severus lips quirked upward.

"But, of course!" Edward laughed, nodding in agreement

-.-

"Children, I have received word from Mr. Elric and confirmation from the Minister that this year's trip to Amestris is a go!"

#Alchemy Series #Tiny Steps #HP #FMA #FMAB #HP/FMA #HP/FMAB #Crossover #AU

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thefeedpost · 6 years

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Who Was I In My Past Life? How You Can Use Your Body To Figure Out Your Past Incarnations

Reincarnation is the ancient belief that human souls do not cease to exist when bodies die. It is the idea that, like energy, they cannot be created or destroyed, rather, they are transformed and reborn into different bodies, times and places.

Though it is not as popular in the west, reincarnation has been a core tenet of eastern religious and spiritual belief for centuries. It is believed that karma (or original sin) is the result of the energy patterns you carried into this life from your last and that the people you meet and have strange or strong reactions to are actually those you have known before, but have an unresolved history with.

Many religions over time have advocated for trying to live by an enlightened way of thinking and behaving. By following a messiah of sorts, you can ascend to a higher dimension by no longer creating low-vibration energy patterns that have to be revisited and worked through continuously.

Even people who were not raised in a religion that taught about reincarnation have had experiences in which they could recall past life events. There are entire books and fields of study that have documented thousands of adults and children who have been able to accurately remember and verify information that many believe they couldn’t have otherwise known.

So how do you know who you were in your past life? As it turns out, it might not be as hard as you think to figure it out.

What is your soul, and why does it reincarnate?

Before you understand who you were and why you came back, it’s important to understand why reincarnation happens in the first place. Your soul is, in theory, an energy field. It is immortal, like any other energy is. When a body dies, the energy that was sustaining it simply moves on. Energy naturally assimilates to a new experience or lifetime by the virtue of matching vibration. If a person had a lifetime filled with love, peacefulness and kindness, that soul’s energy field would be very high, and would reincarnate into a life that reflected it. If a soul’s life was filled with malice and suffering, it would reincarnate into difficult circumstances that could help the person come into self-awareness and ultimately, heal and choose kindness again.

How do you figure out who you were in a past life?

Though there’s no single way to be able to definitively know exactly who you were or what you did, you can use your intuition as well as other tools like regression or kinesiology to help you figure out more about who you used to be.

Why can’t I remember my past lives in the first place?

When you reincarnate into a new body and life, you get what is called a “veil.” A veil = memories from your past lives are completely wiped clean. Some argue this is why we can’t recall where we were before birth, or where we go after death. We simply come into life with a completely blank slate so we can fulfill our destinies and live out our karma. If we were aware of what happened before, we would essentially still be stuck in those lives. For optimal soul development, we have to start with a completely blank slate.

Using your intuition

Many people who can recall their past lives do so simply through an intuitive “hunch.” It’s not that they can specifically remember times, dates or events, but that they feel oddly drawn to one particular place or style. Think of it like this: someone may feel very interested and captivated by the American Civil War. They have an unusual interest in this particular point in history, in a way that they don’t get a gut feeling from the Independence War, for example. Some would argue this is because they are looking at images they are familiar with.

Past life regression

This is the most common and reliable way to work through past life memories, especially if you have a hunch that you experienced something scary or traumatic. Therapists who are trained and specialize in regression will actually work you through a guided meditation in which you will use feelings in your body to trace back through memories that you had suppressed. These individuals theorize that everyone’s past life memories are actually encoded in their energy fields, they just simply aren’t aware of it. Instead, these patterns manifest in similar issues and feelings that they experienced in the former life.

Past life regression is great for people who have an inexplicable amount of pain, resistance, fear or a particularly challenging relationship in their lives. It is also great for people who have irrational fears. Often, these things are not random at all: they are leftover energy patterns from former lifetimes, in which that person potentially had a negative experience. Going through a past life regression and simply remembering where the fear or relationship came from is great for being able to take action in your current life and heal the experience once and for all.

Kinesiology

If you aren’t able to tap into your third eye deeply enough to recall past life memories, you can also utilize something called kinesiology. A trained specialist will have you hold out your arm or hand, and to keep it still. They will then “tap” it, and see how your body reacts. The premise is this: when your body says “yes,” your muscles strengthen, and when someone taps your fingers or arm, it won’t dip down. If your body is saying “no,” it cowers back a bit, and doesn’t feel as strong. Therefore, if someone taps you, your hand will fall a bit.

It’s important to only do this with a trained professional, particularly because you need to not be super aware of what questions are coming, and they need to come quickly enough that you don’t have enough time to think of the answer you want to hear and then subconsciously force your arm to do one thing or another. Kinesiology works best if the practitioner can ask a series of questions and your body can naturally respond. Remember: your body doesn’t need to think about the answer, it already knows.

Past life regression and exploration can be very useful for people who want help working through some of their more difficult issues or patterns in their current life. While it isn’t for everyone, what matters most is that you go into it with the intention of resolving the past and moving forward, and you always engage in regression work with someone who is positive, careful, and there with your best interest in mind.

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I need dental insurance that will cover oral surgery, as I have 2 ingrown wisdom teeth.""

Can my employer drop group health insurance coverage while I am pregnant?

I live in Oklahoma and I just found out that I am pregnant and my employer is considering dropping my group health insurance. Are there any laws that prevent me from being dropped? How do I continue my health insurance to cover my pregnancy?

Would it cost alot to add a second weekend car onto my Insurance?

I am thinking of getting a older blazer from the later 70's to take out on the weekends to go rompin' and 4x4ing, would it cost alot to add it onto my insurance? Would there be a discount since it is not my daily driver car?""

Any affordable health insurance?

i am trying to look for health insurance right now and im trying to look for one thats good any suggestions?

What's the best auto insurance?

What kind of insurance do you have? Is it cheap?

Do illegal immigrants get health insurance?

What insurance and how?

A guy crashed into my today and totaled my car-how much will his insurance pay towards a new car?

My car was worth about $8000, give or take (that's what the officer told me). It was completely paid off. How much will the other guy's insurance pay towards a new car, or should I ask for a check? Which will be the better deal?""

Cheapest car insurance company?

im switching car insurance companies. where will i get the cheapest price?

""Which car insurance firms will insure a Mexican, non resident, for a short duration on my car insurance?""

I require an additional driver on a car insurance policy, I'm a UK resident and require a Mexican with only a Mexican license to drive. Any ideas?""

What is an Average Home insurance rate of a 2 story house?

4.5 baths 5 beds 3000 sq feet finished basement 3 decks 1 fenced in gorund pool Please, just and average for 1 month home insurace. No super valuables or anything. (It's for a project) I just can't find anything that won't just give me a chart or some thing. In class we had to make up an imaginary house and get all this different stuff for it. I've found everything,but home insurance rate without having to put in my personal info.""

Can i switch my health insurance policy -?

hello, i work for a small consulting firm , < 10 employees..on their w2. they provide me a group health insurance for my family (me ,wife and < 1yr old kid) and i pay around $900 every month without vision and dental coverage..all my contribution..and it is with united health care group now - with this new obamacare what options do i have 1. if i switch , will i get a cheaper coverage ? 2. what is that policy exchange ..i hear this a lot these days 3. if i had to switch my policy.who should i approach.. what would you advise for me..pleae advise me on getting a cheaper coverage""

Is there anyway to get health insurance for a part-time student in Massachusetts?

I'm a part time student in Massachusetts and I need health insurance. I was wondering if anyone knows of any affordable health insurance that covers part time students. Thanks in advance!

Car insurance question.?

Okay, so if a car has no insurance is it legal to still drive it as long as I myself am insured?""

How much is insurance on a Chevy Camaro?

I'm 16, ill be on the car by myself. the camaro is a 1998, and in great condition. i have state farm along with my family so ill be on their plan, ive done the steer clear program and have good grades which both give me a discount! does anyone have an estimate of what is might be per month????""

How does a first time car buyer get insurance?

I'm thinking about getting a car, used most likely. The question is how do I go about getting car insurance, I'm a first time car buyer btw? Do I need it before I buy the car? Am I able to buy it with the car? How would I go about getting car insurance? Thanks""

Will Obamacare really convince people to buy health insurance?

I heard that the penalty is lower than the cost of cheap health insurance. Are there any other provisions that would coerce people to buy health insurance?

I need insurance for my car for cheap i'm 21 i had my license for 8 months?

i just bought my car and i need insurance my parents cannot help me . i was thinking about getting insurance out of state .

How much does car insurance cost for a 18 year old?

For a mustang GT 2012? estimate please thank you :)!!

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Auto Insurance Is trying to screw me?

My insurance company totaled my 2002 audi a4 after I hit a puddle and hydro locked my engine After investigating and taking over 3 weeks to finally give me a figure they offerd me 12500 including the taxes the Kelly Blue book rates it at 14000 and the Nada Value is 15,700 I dont know what the process is but i dont understand how they can do this and its very frusterating as well as hard being without a car for over a month now the car was in great condition and had low miles for the year any advice???""

If you are in the military does your car insurance rate go down?

What's the Cheapest Car insurance for First Time Driver?

I just wanna have the cheapest car insurance. I dont need the insurance cover anything. just the cheapest! which company would be the best except geico, progressive or Liberty Matual? Something else?""

Will Car Insurance Fees Go Up?

So recently i was pulled over for speeding. 50 in a 45. Will my fines go up for just being 5+ the limit? If so how much do you think? Also I'm 16 -Thanks

How much would insurance cost for a 16 Y/O Girl with a 1997 Nissan Maxima GLE?

I'm buying a Maxima and I'm turning 17 in February. I plan on getting the car on the road next month and I have a 10% discount from my driving school for taking drivers ed. How much would insurance cost (roughly) per month for a 16 year old girl with a 1997 Nissan Maxima GLE?

I am a resident of California and a permit driver. Do i need to be insured or my parents' insurance will cover

me? will their insurance cover me in case of an accident or not? simply, while a permit bearer, do i still need to have an insurance?""

What kind of car for cheapest insurance?

I'm 23

How much is motorcycle insurance?

I'm only 14 right now but when I hit 16 i'm planning on buying a motorcycle. Planning on buying a Kawasaki Ninja 300r 2013 around my birthday and I remembered a rough factor. How much would insurance be for a 16 year old on a sport bike like that? Don't refer me to a Quote site just a rough estimate I live in Illionois

Do i need to list the second driver on my insurance policy?

If they aren't registerd to the vehicle but drive it often do they need to be on the policy at all? Im paying way too much with two currently...

Pregnant with no health insurance?

I just moved from Washington to Massachusetts. I don't have Massachusetts health insurance and I'm now 4 weeks pregnant. I don't have a job right now since I just moved, but I'm trying to get one I can do throughout my pregnancy. I'm 17 and all of my family is in Washington. My first priority right now is getting health insurance so I can make sure my baby is healthy. I've been trying to do some research but have no idea where to begin. I want to know if anyone knows how a pregnant teenager can get affordable health insurance in Massachusetts. Or if it would be possible to get on my boyfriend's health insurance plan.""

How Much is this Emergency Room Visit without Insurance?

My aunt got really loopy yesterday after hearing bad news and i took her to the emergency room. They took her blood pressure, pricked her finger to test her blood sugar, the nurses/doctor asked her questions, and they gave her an anti-anxiety pill. That was it. No xrays or anything else. it took about 3 hours all together with the waiting. would this still be about 500 - 1000 bucks?""

How much does insurance cost for acura rsx?

im gonna buy a used car soon and i was thinking of buying the rsx. I am 16 so i would join the insurance plan with my mom. I have good grades and my mom has a clean driving record. I just need a rough estimate

Where is the best website to compare pco insurance prices?

fully comprehensive i would like a quote straight away. some websites you give all the details and it says that the company will contact the person regarding the quote. i want to compare mini cab insurance not taxi insurance. thank you so much in advance. :)

What can I do about this insurance/car accident?

Recently, my husband was hit in my car while going through a green light. The girl didn't see him as he was going through and turned and hit him. Now we are fighting with her crappy insurance. They are trying to say we are 25% liable and they will only pay 75% to fix our car. They are trying to say my husband should have been more cautious going through the light. It was a green light! So, what, we are supposed to treat stoplights like stop signs now? How ridiculous. My question is, what can I do to get my car 100% paid for and do they even have the right to claim who is liable or not? Isn't that the cops job? My husband decided to be nice and not have the cop issue her a ticket. Was that a bad idea? I mean, she turned into him. How much more cautious could my husband have been? He hit his brakes but by that time it was too late. This insurance company is saying he should have tried harder to avoid the accident. What else could one possibly do!?""

What is some cheap health insurance?

""Car payments, insurance and registration fees?""

I want to buy a car soon, but besides the car payment I was wondering how much it costs to register the car. Also I dont know if I have to register a car if Im buying a used car (itll be a newer year, but used). Im only 18 (female) and I just received my license a little while ago. Also how do I see how much insurance will cost me? Im on a budget because Im also attending college (graduated high school) and Im paying for everything myself. I do not have people to rely on for any financial aid. Though, I may ask for a car loan if I can get one. I live in the sate of Oregon (If laws vary in different states).""

""Car insurance costs, is this right?""

Im currently 19 years old and have been with Esurance for a year now. I have a 1998 honda civic and my payments are at $65 a month, im currently looking in to buying a new car and called them up tonight to get a quote for it and they said my monthly payments would increase to $360 a month (car i called about was a 2012 chevy sonic hatchback). Does this large of an increas seem correct? I have never gotten in to an accident nor needed to call upon my insurance for anything, so why does the price jump so much higher?""

Concerning GPA for good student discount for car insurance !?

on my report card for my final grade pint average i had received an 85 would that get me the good student discount for state farm

Insurance costs on 350z & g35?

Prices just on average? In Texas. 16 year old girl. How much does color matter? What are the different prices for blue, black, silver, & white? How much does the z and Infiniti coupe differ? Please don't tell me to choose different cars..I'm asking for insurance price, not your opinion""

Insurance under 4000 for 17 year old?

Ok, well I'm 17 (male) and have passed my driving test. I have compared many quotes for all the worst and lowest engine cars, like corsa 1.0, peugeot 106 1.1 etc I just can't seem to get a quote under 4000! Does anyone know if there is anything I can do to get affordable insurance? I heard that insurance for 17 year olds has doubled in the past year but didn't reckon it would be this much! Any help you can give would be greatly appreciated :)""

Cars that have cheap insurance!!!!?

Right, i'm 18 and i'm going to get a car.. but the insurance for me is just mental. I need to know what cars have REALLY cheap insurance, and the name of the insurance company(s)!?""

How much will insurance cost for a kawasaki ninja 250r monthly for a 20 year old beginner?

i think i might go with state farm.

What is the least expensive car insurance money can buy?

So i REALLY need a car, but i CANNOT afford insurance. Honestly, if it was legal to not have insurance on a car, i would do that. So the only reason i'm getting insurance is so that i'm legal on the road. I don't care if the insurance covers only the tires of the car, what is the least expensive company and quote i can get?""

Term or Whole life insurance which is best for 18 yr old female and what is the difference?

Is $12 per month a good premium for a 30k term life policy for the 18 yr old female?

What are the best car insurance comparison sites you have used in London?

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Do additional safety features pay for themselves via cheaper insurance rates?

Specifically anti-lock brakes and side curtain airbags, on a small sedan. I'm planning on buying a new or less used vehicle soon. The only things that matter are: gas efficiency, reliability, and a low total price to own.""

How much is insurance per month?

Insurance for a car. I'm going to buy a used car for no more than $3000, for getting to and fro school. How much would insurance be? Is insurance where you take out a loan and pay back on it month by month, forever? Or can you cease it at anytime?""

How much is car insurance for a 19yr old N driv er in BC?

I am nearly 19 about to buy a cheap car and insure it for the bare legal minimum how much approx will that cost me

Does anyone know what would be a cheap first car for a 17 year old girl??

Hi... Just wondering if anyone knows which cars are cheaper to insure for a 17 year old girl. Any suggestions please.....................

Can I be put under my dads car insurance?

I am an independent full time student. I live in my own apartment and I work full time. Currently I pay for my own car insurance and being that I am 19 years old, it is through the roof($170 a month). I have a perfect driving record. I live in Virginia and my dad lives in Alabama. Is it possible that I can be put on his car insurance to save money? I am buying a new car soon and I need to upgrade to full coverage, which is around $230 a month, which is higher then the car payment itself.""

Cheapest Car insurance?

what's a good starter car insurance for someone who is just getting their license and dosnt want to spend alot. What is the cheapist insurance that you can get. All the comercials for car insurance say that their insurance is the best but i dont know which one accually is the best...

Cheap car for a 18 year old in the UK?

Hi, I'm turning 18 in few months and I wanted to buy a car. What is the best car with the cheapest insurance? (the only thing that is important to me is for me to fit in the car, I'm 6ft 9!) What should I look at when choosing a car if I want to have affordable insurance? My first choice was a old, old Mini but the insurance on that was over 5000 pounds, any suggestions? (I was using confused.com) Many Thanks Barboro37""

Car accident and they got old insurance.?

I got in a car accident last November and they tried to hit me with 6 duis with no evidence. We got the FDLC results 6 MONTHS LATER, and it came up with nothing. I have no idea what they had to charge me with 6 DUIs, however... It was reduced to reckless driving. Anyways, when I got in the accident, I left in an ambulance. The police gave out the wrong car insurance (I had just got statefarm the day before.) They gave like esurance to everyone, which was the WRONG insurance. So, I ended up having to tell the hospitals etc that they gave out the wrong insurance. Then I got a call from one of the people I hit's insurance, and they queried about what insurance I had (They said the policy they were given expired in like 08.)... Part of the deal of reckless driving is that I pay restitution. My lawyer is unaware that the police gave out the wrong insurance, but he told me that there should be like nothing (insurance should cover all of it.) I just got a letter in the mail yesterday saying that I owe 2500 to some person. Is it possible that he was given the wrong insurance as well, thus me getting charged for this?""

""For each car you own, you need car insurance for each one, right? How much do they usually charge?""

I don't own a car, so I don't know.""

Cheap car insurance in ontario?

I am thinking of getting my own vehicle this summer... Does anyone know of any plqce where there is cheap or reasonably priced insurqnce for teens?

Are there any car insurance companies that only look back 2 years instead of 3?

Can I drive a car without teenage insurance?

My uncle said I can borrow his car for new years, but he doesn't have teenage insurance. Would he need it if I'm only borrowing it for one day and night? Can I still drive it? If something happens will regular insurance cover? I've been driving for a while I'm good at it. Plus a few of my friends riding are also licensed, the oldest 23. I'm 18.""

Can a 20 yr old college student get medicaid for health insurance?

Her dad is on disability and her mother has left and is living in another state. She gets financial aid and grants. Right now she has no health insurance at all.

Insurance companies taking advantage?

is there a chance that insurance companies are taking advantage of obama-care and increasing costs more than they really needed? looks like a % of insured are getting hit but what is the % of uninsured or insurance denials that are now covered? any good stories?

How much is insurance on a genesis coupe?

im doing thiss on my phone im at work so i cant call an insurance company. please help

What would happen if Americans didn't rely on their employers for affordable health insurance?

My policy with my pre-existing condition would be $1,300 per month. Thank God I have a real job that provides benefits. What would happen if Americans didn't get their health insurance through their employer? Would we end up like Australia?""

What's the most affordable auto insurance when you have drivers under 25?

I have two sons: ages 21 and 16. Need to know the cheapest option someone has found. The 16 year old took the defensive driving course, that it helps to lower his monthly insurance payment? What else, if anything, helps to lower the cost when there is under 25 years old drivers? Appreciate your answers""

What is the best motorcycle insurance to purchase?

I have a motorcycle, and I'm looking to find insurance. I took the basic riders course that offers insurance discounts. What is the best and most affordable motorcycle insurance to get? P.S. My car insurance company doesn't offer motorcycle insurance""

In Florida what is the charge ($) for driving without car insurance?

I recently found out that my car insurance was cancelled through my ins. company. I know I need to get a new policy asap. I have been told that the state charges the driver a certain amount for everyday that they are driving a registered car without any car insurance. Is this true and does anyone know how much it is in the state of Florida?

Motorcycle insurance?

how much would it cost for a new motorcyclist to pay for his insurance if he got a used bike.

What would the insurance be on a 2010 Camaro SS?

I know there are a lot of things that factor into the cost of insurance but if anyone could give me a ballpark estimate that would be great.

What is a good life insurance company for the price?

I want to purchace some life insurance just in case.

Guess our car insurance?

Primary driver: 24, perfect driving record, female, some college completed but no degree The car: Something mediocre from the late 80s to late 90s The insurance: Minnesota, metro area, daily 10-20 mile commute each way, we want all the proper liability and personal injury coverage but don't care about collision Seriously, just guess. We'll take any ideas. We completely know it varies by each of those factors and many more, and we already know the national average. If you know the state average, that's one step up on us. I'd get a quote, but my roommate is the one seriously thinking about cars right now, and I don't want to do anything in someone else's name. She'll be getting quotes soon, but right now I'm a little concerned about the insurance companies possibly running credit checks, as I'm under the impression a slew of them at a time can lower your score, and we don't know what car we're getting yet. So once that's settled, we'll check into it for real. We just want to TRY to budget before we seriously car hunt.""

Looking for some dental insurance in California. Any suggestions?

I'm right now looking for some dental insurance in California, but after looking for a while, I'm getting quite confused. My aim is to get an affordable plan that covers things like root canals, cleanings, x-rays. Adult braces and braces are of a lower priority right now. Does anyone have any suggestions for an affordable plan? My current location in in the Bay Area.""

How much will car insurance cost me per month?

I'm 18, just passed my test in April and want to get insured on my mums car. I want to only get insured for the summer so lets say i want to be insured for one month on my mum's VW Golf 1.8. I know its a big engine but its an ancient car...i think its 18 years old and my mums insurance is quite cheap atm she has over 6 years NCB i think. So how much will it cost me to be insured for one month on my mums insurance?""

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