Last week, a coworker accused me of manipulating the system at work for my benefit. I knew I wasn't doing anything wrong, but was still nervous and quite hurt by the accusation. This coworker must not know the amount of anxiety I carry with me and how I would have confessed my sins on day 2 if I was knowingly doing something wrong, mainly because I'd never be able to sleep😅
In any event, my bosses took it seriously and looked into things, and found the accusation completely unfounded.
Today, I received notice that I got a promotion I applied for and start tomorrow. And I just...chefs kiss, truly!
"Alexa, play Karma by Taylor Swift..."
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My March summary and Life lessons
Hello Everyone.
For me, March started with a shock with Grandpa having a heart attack and being admitted to ICU for the first time. It took a toll on my mental health especially and I almost went into depression. Days continued and his wealth fluctuated like waves. I started being paranoid about his health and couldn't sleep at night and kept checking on him. I also had mini episodes of anxiety attacks. Then someone decided to "expose me" which fortunately didn't go according to her plans. I still continued looking out for everyone and ignored my mental and physical health for him. But recently a new family drama broke out and I was considered the villain because I refused to agree with my aunt and grandpa and confronted them when they were speaking ill of us despite us doing everything for them (they called me and my family thieves and it was basically about my aunt spending money for her father's treatment).
I am dumbfounded and shocked at the same time looking at their behaviors towards me.
But despite everything I still believe in doing good and I will continue to believe in good. The major lesson learned here is to Never ignore your own mental health and the physical health for anyone. NEVER!!!! I did and I learned my lesson very hard away. Now I will just focus on myself and my family(mum, paa, and my sibling) because they stood for me every time and kept me intact. Even though Life is not every time all goodies, I will keep believing that whatever happens- happens for a reason and that I am protected. They won't be successful in making me a bitter person. I won't let them. Whatever they did, Karma will get back to them and I am very sure of it. That's why I am keeping my side of the street clean. I will continue being the same person I was but with more life lessons learned along the way. Although still I can't get that incident out of my head I am trying to sit with with and acknowledge it. It shall pass too. Whenever I think about them I start to feel nauseous and this is my sign to not pay attention to them anymore. They are not worth my time and energy anymore, no one who hurts me and my family is.
Make yourself a priority always and don't try to control what cannot be controlled. I did and failed miserably (lol).
*I wrote this all as an example to you guys to be cautious of where you are spending your energy. I consider you all my online family. Don't let anyone make you feel that you are a bad person based on their perceptions of you.
Talk to someone and let everything out. , I am blessed to have such people here and from my friend circle who helped me with their positive words. I decided to be vulnerable and reach out for help and trust me it is one of the best decisions that I have ever made. I hope this is the beginning of something new and exciting. I am leaving everything that happened with me in the past, just taking the lessons from it. I will still consider them family but they lost my respect because my personal boundaries were crossed and I take my personal boundaries very seriously. I won't let anyone cross it again.
Shout out to @misericordieux especially for listening to me and giving me strength to go through all of this.
Thank you and Love,
Infinity 🧿🫶🏼
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I CANT GET FUCKINGGHGH KARMA BY TAYLOR SWIFT OUT OF MY HEAD IM ABT TO KILL SOMEONE
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Silent karma is the best karma. Watching someone who tried tearing you down slowly showing everyone their true colors while you heal is one of the most validating things. “I keep my side of the street clean. You wouldn’t know what I mean.”
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Karma is not really a relaxing thought right now guys I must say
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who’s afraid of little old me? like a warning shot: you’ll all get yours and cold was the steel of my axe to grind and does a scorpion sting when fighting back? and ask me why so many fade but i'm. still. here. and never be so polite, you forget your power and i'll make a fist, i'll make it count and when you aim at the devil make sure you don't miss and i rose up from the dead i do it all the time! and i don’t belong and i can make the whole place shimmer
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you know what just makes me really sad. i WANT to be excited about the karma music video. i WANT to be excited about her bringing ice spice on stage, about her singing GETAWAY CAR (my favourite rep song), about the new outfits and everything i loved about keeping up with the eras tour.
but i just cant. and maybe it’s parasocial but it genuinely feels like heartbreak as a poc swiftie that i just cant enjoy this woman’s music or content anymore that i used to absolutely love and get so excited about. i can’t get excited about the easter eggs for 1989 and rep TV or the stunning visuals in the music video. because i feel so betrayed and hurt that she’s throwing all this stuff at her fans to take the heat off her political inconsistency and white supremacist boyfriend. everyone’s already forgotten about holding her accountable because she dropped three new songs and a music video. i just also can’t get behind swifties villainising joe again and saying he’s worse than john mayer…more than matty healy.
the whiteness of this woman and her fandom have finally made me quit, and the worst part? she won’t care that she’s lost her poc fans. her white ones will continue eating up whatever she does and help her break record after record and become the billionaire she so clearly wants to be. she’ll still get her money and her clout, and her army of fans will harass anyone (including her) who points out her alarming flaws.
i cant get behind the hype anymore, and it feels like a real loss to me as someone who enjoyed taylor swift for fourteen whole years.
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no hate, no shade because in my opinion she's a cool artist but taylor swift is literally the embodiment of performative activism and corporate feminism and lacks the dimension (at least publicly) to see nuance in either conversation where it doesn't touch her.
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twitter pisses me off putting taylor swift hate posts in my feed just cause the algorithm decides it's relevant to my interests. at least here the taylor hate posts come from my dear mutuals who i love, not some random weirdo i probably can't stand.
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today i remembered something taylor told me about not letting pain change who you are and how you treat others and it made me 🥹
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Lt. Sadi Ratan: And you will be brought to trial for lying to me, a police officer!
Atty. Edilberto Alcantara: (bursting into Jo Gar's office) "Lying to me"? Who the fuck do you think Jo Gar is, your wayward husband?
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Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Jo Gar Series - Ramon Decolta
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Jo Gar - Character, Sadi Ratan
Additional Tags: Original Character(s), The Magician Murder, The Magician Murder AU, Abuse of Authority, not-quite accurate depiction of legal processes in pre-Revised Penal Code era, mixed opinions on American-era occupation, it's set during the American occupation of the Philippines (duh!), no beta we die like every murder victim of every Jo Gar story ever, sadi sounds more like a spurned lover fight me
Summary:
“And you will be brought to trial for lying to me, a police officer!” Edilberto heard Lieutenant Ratan fiercely threaten Jo Gar.
“‘Lying to me?’” he repeated the words mockingly as a greeting to the lieutenant. He closed the door behind him a little too strongly and raised a brow at the lieutenant. “Who the fuck do you think Jo Gar is, your wayward husband?”
When a chat about the case of the murdered magician goes ugly, one of Jo Gar's longtime acquaintances walks up into the scene and chooses figurative violence against the lieutenant of the Manila Police Station who thinks he is right in accusing an innocent man of a murder he may not commit. Or "The Magician Murder" AU in which someone puts Sadi Ratan in his place.
Title from Taylor Swift's "Karma".
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