#i have to work literally every day until the 3rd i am GOING to go insane | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

serafilms · 4 months

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just some of my fav content that kpop (boy) groups have put out (very specific!!!)

i spend many an hour on it (like actually just one hour) because i don’t want to work on my wips!!!

nct 127 hit the states: haechan x dallas

HAECHAN SILVER HAIR HAECHAN SILVER HAIR i will never shut up. this and purple and we go up brown/rainbow are his best looks idgaf. they’re just soo cute here and having so much fun and i can’t even believe how fun it looks :(( i wanna have a day like this

nct 127 hit the states: mark x vancouver

such a beautiful scenery and seeing mark be so happy in his hometown w the rest of 127 is so cute. taeil and jungwoo are so funny here too

boynextdoor pretty u cover

SLAYED! nothing more to say. i love bnd performances they ate down period.

beomgyu kids’ café on workman

the editing is so funny in this video PLS and the way the little girls all hated him but the boys were obsessed with him 😭 the café staff are so fun and nice too 👍 i love beomgyu sm

nct dream candy mv

no explanation required. once you candy you never stop candying. the cutest music video EVER i love it so much. nct dream mv’s always EAT. hello future, we go up, chewing gum, go, life is still going on (track video but still cute), hot sauce

txt lo$er=lover office attack version

so creative and fun and they look so good 😋

nct dream rooftop fight

so glad they actually did this bc i was waiting for it for so long 😭 they hyped it up for so many years did NOT disappoint. nct will never not be funny.

stray kids fancy cover

THE WAY I ACTUALLY FORGOT THIS HAPPENED UNTIL JUST NOW WHEN I WAS GOING THROUGH MY YOUTUBE PLAYLIST. omg we moved on too soon

boynextdoor funnextdoor

i’m actually in the process of watching it rn but i’m actually so amazed at how genuine and funny they are?? usually a lot of groups (excluding survival show groups) take a while to warm up to the cameras and talk to them and be natural around them and their members in front of them, but you can really tell how comfortable bnd are with each other and even though they’re warming up the the cameras, they’re so cute about it and so natural and outgoing that it’s not awkward at all and so fun to watch! and on that note….

boynextdoor what? door!

they’re so funny omg also bc why are hybe editors so slay?? will never stop promoting bnd (+zb1!!! love riize too but they have sufficient hype tbh i need bnd appreciation!! 5th gen boy groups let’s gooooo)

zerobaseone zbtv

ok so this list actually isn’t specific anymore but can u blame me. they’re so funny in all of the episodes how am i to choose just one. zb1 are quite literally one of the absolute funniest groups I’ve ever seen. love them sm PLEASE stan before they disband 😞

eunchae star diary with sunghoon and heeseung

EUNCHAE !!!!! she’s so cute i love eunchae star diary 😭 this was more awkward than the jake ni-ki one tbh but it was really cute too 👍 and the way sunghoon kept trying to weasel out the tea from her like leave that girl alone hoon 😭😭

honourable mentions to the kyujin and hiyyih episodes too!! bc it’s so fun to see eunchae with her friends

en o’clock episode 12

the one where they did like the high up line training course thing idk what it’s called and they were wearing camo print like military ish stuff idk man but it’s so funny and their early days r so cute

en o’clock episodes 32 and 33

the irl among us episodes 😭😭

boys planet jelly pop

MY GODDDDDD JELLY POP ZHANG HAO I LOVE U SM. i wish he liked women and was 4 years younger and went to my uni. i purchased many zhang hao pc’s recently. jelly pop my #7 most played song in spotify. i watched it too many times. saved so many edits. ilysm king.

txt idol human theatre when they went to that house

the way the managers lifted taehyun out of the pool gets me every single time 😭😭😭

txt idol human theatre during blue hour era

my fav idol human theatre episode EVER. so funny and i love blue hour era sm‼️

stray kids family 3rd anniversary

skz with wigs will never not be iconic. and why did jeongin and felix lowkey devour acting elderly like???

to do x txt flying yoga episode 83

i love this episode so much actually omfg PLEASEE they’re so funny 😭 kpop idols doing any kind of strenuous movement exercise is my favourite content ever

to do x txt self defense episode 104

this one is CRIMINALLY underrated actually. wdym both parts don’t have 1 million views at least? can’t tell you how many times i had to rewind bc i was enjoying it so much 🫶🫶 i have plans to rewatch this soon so i also can learn some self defense moves.

run bts episode 55

this whole trip starts from ep 53 but them slapping each other’s asses and trying not to laugh is one of the funniest things i’ve ever watched actually,, this was one of the first run bts vids i watched on vlive and it brings me back when i see clips of it 😢

the nct show (nct 2020 but in 2022)

i love LOVE when nct all gets together :( nct 2018 and nct world 2.0 !!!! everything happens for a reason and sungchan and shotaro belong in riize but this video is so fun and they’re all so cute together!! field day episodes!!!!!! this and hybe game caterers fr

007” 00” the nct show

same as previous with extra emphasis on I LOVE THE 00 LINE HOKY FUCK. yangyang ❤️❤️❤️ i need to watch more wayv content i miss him

upper side dreamin’ halloween version behind the scenes

sunoo dancing to mama at the end is peak editing. enha vs ghosts let’s go!!! they’re all so cute and funny in this 🥳🥳 the way ni-ki abandoned the camera man bye 😭

txt magic island mv

words cannot express how much i miss the dream chapter: magic era. how i wish i could find a song that makes me feel the way run away and magic island do. the things i’d do to listen to that album for the first time omfg!!!! anyways this mv and the run away mv make me so emotional like 😭😭😭 also old bts txt lore used to be so confusing to me like i would spend soo so long trying to figure it out

anyways that’s it bc youtube search and sorting history filters are ass so i can’t find many more but i hope at least 1 person finds a new video to watch from this.

#ashley speaks !#boynextdoor #tomorrow x together #stray kids #bts #enhypen #zerobaseone #nct

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usertiff · 1 year

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TLDR: no rent money, last time i was late w rent by 2 days i got an eviction notice, my cat needs urgent medical help, i’m out of work due to severely debilitating pain. extremely disabled, indigenous lesbian desperately in need of help. also a paragraph about how much i am sorry

my friend said, “nah bestie asking for help isn't shameful in any way. there's strength in knowing what you need,” but i still feel like crud

i am literally sobbing as i post this because i just feel... i feel like a loser, i feel worthless, i feel so many emotions right now because i’m so terrified and tired of asking for help. i’m terrified of people just being sick of me because i’ve needed help before, and i don’t know. i would never shame anyone else for needing help, and i know realistically it shouldn’t be shameful, but i personally feel shame because i feel like a failure. i feel like a loser/worthless/failure because of something that’s completely out of my control, and yet, the feeling is still there. i’m exhausted. i’m exhausted from being in this stressful, urgent situation. so i’m sorry. i’m so sorry i’m asking for help again, i’m so sorry. i feel horrible, i really do. i feel guilty for needing help. i feel sick. i’m trying not to, and i’m trying not to cry, but i’m typing this through very blurry vision rn.

as i’ve mentioned on my blog, i’ve been out of work due to severe chronic pain. i was able to work through my other disabilities. narcolepsy, my shitty mental health auDHD/bipolar, etc. but this chronic pain has been completely fucking debilitating. medical fatphobia tw incoming: i saw a neurosurgeon today and they won’t give me surgery because of “my weight being a risk for post-op complications, such as stitch rips”, so i just have to deal with the pain until i can lose enough they’ll operate on me ????????? i dont know what the hell i’m going to do........... this sucks so fucking bad i just wanna go back to work i hate living like this

my fiance needs her wisdom teeth removed really badly, but we had to cancel her appointment because the money we saved for it had to go to our cat.

possible animal death tw: my cat has bladder stones now................................. last time he had stones it costed almost $1k in surgery. the bladder stones will kill him if not treated, because toxins build up in the body and if he cannot pee... just sldfksldfkj i don’t wanna talk about it. he’s miserable.

i’m going to have to dip in to our rent money, which was actually our tax money because i’ve not been working so tax money was our saving grace this past month, to keep taking him to the vet. however, last time i was late on rent just 2 days, they gave us an eviction notice and only 7 days to come up with rent. that was a fucking disaster. so i’m TERRIFIED!!!!!!!

i need help so bad. with just surviving being out of work, and now my cat... i’m super annoyed because i was desperate to get my baby sister a doll for her birthday but there’s no way that’s happening now.

anyway, i’m sorry. i’m sorry for everything. i’m sorry i need help. i’m sorry if you’re sick of seeing me on your dash for like the 3rd time needing major help.

i have set up a gofundme here https://www.gofundme.com/f/uwkhj-help-my-family-survive?utm_source=customer&utm_medium=copy_link&utm_campaign=p_cf+share-flow-1

however, if you’d prefer to donate directly, due to the fact that gofundme takes a big portion of funds, here are my accts:

pypl: [email protected], v: @oraclelauren (3177), ca: $selinaaakyle

every donation is going to be greatly appreciated, and i promise to pay the kindness forward in every little way that i can

please don’t put yourself out to help, but if you can help, my heart goes out to you with forever gratefulness

#i am so exhausted #donations #gofundme #lgbt donations #idk what to tag #im so scared #my heart is pounding i feel so sick i just feel guilty for needing help #i know i shouldn't but i just do :sob:

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tbb-appreciation-week · 1 year

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(Updated May 2024)

Now that the prompts have been revealed, I thought of answering some questions some of you might find helpful about the event.

Please make sure to read the Event Info carefully first, as most of your questions will be answered there already. For everything else, check out the F.A.Q under the cut.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is [fill the blank] allowed?

When in doubt:

And how about…?

Yes, that, too. Give total freedom to your creativity, and don't worry about whether it's allowed or not. Most things are okay, barring anything inciting or glorifying harassment, hatred, or discrimination of any kind.

Do I have to post for all 7 days?

Participate as little or much as you like! Just be sure to tag your posts properly (e.g., #tbbaw2024 #dayX #warnings #theme (and/or prompts) #medium #more tags). There are no repercussions if you don’t fill prompts for each day.

Can I post early/late?

You could, but I wouldn’t recommend posting early. Since this is an Appreciation Week event, it'd be more fun with everyone doing it at the same time. That being said, I’ll start reblogging works on September 2nd (thinking on the folks living on the other side of the world from me. You know, time zones and all that), but nothing earlier than that.

As for posting late, yes, that's totally fine; I understand that real life gets in the way sometimes. The only thing I ask is that you tag the for the day you should've posted on, not the day you're actually doing it. Example, if you missed Day 2 and are posting it on the Day 4, your tags must include #Day 2, NOT Day 4.

So, when should I start posting?

According to your time zone, during the day at the most convenient time for you, starting on September 3rd until the 9th. If you're super eager and can't wait, post when the clock hits midnight every day. Or if you're late, 11:59pm still counts as on time! 🤣

Will you reblog my post?

Yes, I'll reblog everyone's posts during the week. If it passes more than 2-3 days and I haven't reblogged your post, please let me know. If you tag your post properly and mention this blog, it’s less likely that I'll miss it.

However, I'm thinking that I might queue posts if they're too many at a time to drop them in bulk. If I do that, look for a like from @intrepidmare (my main blog), if you have it, that means I saw it and put it on the queue and eventually will be reblogged.

What if I don’t understand how the themes and prompts work?

Send me an ask! I'm happy to clarify it for you. To put it in simple words, you have a theme that it's in and on itself a prompt, which you can (but not necessarily) combine with any of the prompts for that day. However, you can also ignore the theme and go for a specific prompt only. It's up to you. And remember, the prompts are entirely up for interpretation. Don’t take them too literally. Prompts are suggestions, not mandates. You can go by ✨ vibes ✨ alone.

What kind of content can I make? Can it be NSFW?

Yes, that’s why NSFW prompts are included among the others for each day. And if you use the other safer prompts and turn it into something NSFW, that's okay too. In any case, you should tag your work accordingly, so that others participating in the event can curate their experience and be safe. HERE is a non-comprehensive list of tags you should use if they apply to your work.

Can I combine TBBAW prompts with other creation challenges?

Absolutely! If you have a bingo card to fill or another event to complete, go for it. That’s like shooting two mynocks with one bolt, using one of Crosshair's reflective disks!

Can I upload/repost my TBBAW content to other social media platforms?

Of course! You can post your own content wherever you like. Additionally, I’ve created an AO3 Collection to archive any work posted there. It can be accessed here. (It's closed right now, but I'll open it in due time)

If any of the prompts fits well for an existing fic/art I am currently working on, can I use it?

If you are actively working on this fic/art at the moment with the Appreciation Week prompts in mind, yes. In the case of using a work retroactively (meaning: already published and complete), then please, don’t. You can, however, add new chapters/pages/panels using one or more of the prompts.

If I’m not comfortable with this or that day’s prompts, can I use a prompt from a different day as a substitute and still count?

No, you can’t exchange prompts from different days (as in exchanging Day 3 prompts for Day 5 prompts). You can simply skip it, or come up with yours. Like I said, the prompts are only a suggestion.

Where can I post my work?

Post where and how you want. You don’t have to cross-post it to Tumblr. Just keep in mind, if it’s not on Tumblr, I won't be able to add it to the blog archive. You can post a just link to anywhere else you've posted if you don't want to put the entire work in your blog.

Do I have to finish a fic I started? Can I post a work in progress?

Yes, you can post WIPs. And you’re not obligated to finish it. It'd make me happy that this event prompt you to create something longer. Let's appreciate the Bad Batch all year around!

Is co-creating allowed?

Yes, absolutely! Encouraged, even. Not just the usual writer-artist or co-writing collaborations, also any kind of medium combos: fic-podfic, fic-playlist, art-art, etc.

Do I have to create 7 standalone pieces, or can I make one continuous story?

Do whatever you want. One continuous story is fine. The challenge is to create something for 7 prompts. If that’s spread over 7 fics/art pieces/etc. or just one with 7 chapters/panels/parts, it's up to you.

Is there a min/max limit on word count?

None. If you want to write a 100-word drabble or a 50k fic or anything in between for each day, it's all up to you. You're the only one who knows how much time you can dedicate to it and how high/low your level of inspiration/energy is. You can even write a snippet for a fic you'll write later when you have the time/energy. Remember that this is lay-back-type of an event. Do as little or much as you want/can.

Can I combine prompts? Is there a limit on how many?

No limit, and you can combine as many prompts for a specific day as you like. If you want to use them all, do it.

If you want to use all the prompts individually, there's also the option to create several pieces for a single day. It depends on you, your time, and your motivation. This counts too if you do works in different mediums, e.g., write a fic and do art for it (or for a different prompt).

Can I start working on the prompts before September 3rd?

Of course! That’s the idea of posting the prompts so early. I know how difficult it can be to create something in “real time”, without mentioning real life complications, so feel free to start creating as soon as now!! You'll have over 3 months to work on your pieces.

How do I tag triggers?

Just tag the word/phrase, e.g., blood; main character death. (DO NOT add "tw" either at the beginning or the end. That makes it harder for readers to block the right tags). Here it's the list of the most common warning tags you should use when appropriate.

Also, it would be prudent to add warnings in the body of the post, giving the readers another layer of protection before they do the actual reading.

Do I have to use your tags guidelines?

I'd appreciate it if you did. If you follow the guide I gave you in the tags post here, it'd make it easier for me to keep track of who posted on a determined day, and for anyone else to find and/or avoid the content of a specific tag.

Can we @ you?

Yes, please DO! I think it's the safest way for me not to miss your posts. I'll also be following the #tbbaw2024 tag, just for good measure.

Is there anything we are absolutely not allowed to write?

As I said before, anything goes, EXCEPT anything inciting or glorifying harassment, hatred, and discrimination of any kind against anything or anyone. THAT WON'T BE TOLERATED. For anything else, please make sure to properly tag your trigger warnings. And keep in mind Tumblr’s policies if you are posting it here (or the policies for whatever other site you use).

Can I cross post on other blogs?

Yes, sure. That's fine. You can also post different works to different accounts under different names, without posting them everywhere at once.

If you got another question that you didn't find the answer to here, please, send an ask through the inbox, and I'll do my best to clarify your doubts.

Thanks for reading, and happy creating!

#tbb appreciation week #tbb appreciation week 2023 #tbbaw2023 #tbbaw faq #faq post

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torchsart · 1 year

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*hits my sona with addisonification beam* hi

inspired by @tolabia's post abt what color addi you would be and what would you sell!! firewall was technically born that day... nd then i made her cooler by giving her an aux cord tail

sprite edit closeups and more info under the cut :D

i see that everyone makes small and big versions for stuff like this so. me too

Note i am not good at pixles

OK SO first off, the name firewall is entirely unrelated to anything abt them, its just a play on the fact that i go by Torch and Firewalls are a computer thing

multiple design elements are borrowed from my main sona! the hair shape, her eyes being light/dark + 3rd color, and the fact she has sharp teeth and a mask & tail

makes you accept terms and conditions before buying her $1 thought, which legally lets her follow you around until you pay her or she somehow runs out of things to talk abt

carries the speaker everywhere, keeps it in her inventory outside of work hours

the voice that comes out of the speaker is theirs! but changes based on what theyre thinking abt. for example if they have a certain song stuck in their head, youll just hear whatever part theyre thinking abt

her tail is compatible with anything an aux cord can be plugged into!! the broadcast wont stop unless she gets unplugged, the device itself is turned off or muted, or she somehow manages to just Stop Thinking

the Shut Up price varies, but its never below $100 unless you reeaallyy beg for it, she might have mercy on you. youll hear her exact thought process as she decides whether or not to give you a discount

in more personal settings, they talk normally so they can plan their words better. in situations where itd be difficult for them to say something out loud, theyll use the speaker instead

feels more vulnerable without the mask than literally broadcasting their every thought

However. has absolutely embarrassed themself by leaving the speaker on in certain situations. like noting that someone cute walked by only for that person to hear it

extra fluffy under the uniform :3

undecided if other addisons can have tails too or if she gets to be my specialest girl..

theres no real reason she cant keep up the Customer Service face, its just too tiring for her and the facade breaks more often than not. shes better at keeping up the smile so she only wears a masquerade mask

personality wise, theyre just sort of bubbly! gets rlly passionate abt the things they like and are eager to ramble to anyone wholl listen! does try to be genuinely polite and friendly but the addison nature of needing to sell can get in the way at times

im stealing the glowy addisons hc and also addis purring so Yeah firewall does that too. they glow a lot when theyre excited and they also make chirps and trills ^^

can also get Quite Anxious and overthink a lot. if the speaker is on, itll be easy to catch and talk her out of it with some reassurance :)

#deltarune #addisons #addisona #addison oc #sona #deltarune oc #deltarune fanart #dont tag as kin/id/me #fanart #Btw i am always down to talk abt her and addisons and deltarune in general on my main....#torchs art #nov 2022 #sona: firewall #my ocs #oc ref sheet

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gobbluthbutagirl · 1 year

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summer 2022 was peak My Job like. every day i would come in and more carts would have mysteriously vanished. we already had not had baskets for several months. there was a one-legged old man with his dick out in the parking garage. the a/c died for like 5 days in june and it was somehow infinitely hotter and more humid inside the store than it was outside and i literally almost died from dehydration because the former hr guy(bastard that he was) would NOT stop sending me on cart runs. a bald guy tried to steal like $1400 worth of stuff including at least eight pairs of haircutting scissors. a guy had a box full of bees in the parking garage. a guy smeared chocolate pudding all over the windows & door because he was mad he couldn’t come in after closing and it looked like shit(literally). someone forgot their skateboard that had the words “fuck you” on it in the store and never came back to retrieve it. an old man grabbed shaving cream off the shelf and smeared it all over not only his face but also everything in his cart and then asked if we had “a restaurant”(“do you mean a restroom?” my coworker had to ask) where he could wash his face off because he had “a mess going on here.” this happened the same night as the pudding incident. the entire FOS team called out on july 3rd except for like 3 people and it was the single craziest night i have ever experienced. one guy even caught covid that night and was out for like 10 days. i developed a stomach ulcer and did not know what it was and simply assumed i must be dying and went “this is fine.” i had to clean up human piss. i had to clean up human shit. i had to clean up chips & salsa that a guy had grabbed off the shelf & then begun eating & then dropped on the carpet. i scrubbed the world’s dirtiest & nastiest target cart for over an hour until it looked presentable enough to have in the store and barely a month later it got stolen too. i walked out of one shift not even 2 hours in because the former hr guy made me so so mad and then 2 days later i showed up randomly to yell at him. i said, “you’re an asshole and nobody likes you. i have heard a lot of people say a lot of things about you and NONE of them have been anything good!” and he said, “please don’t quit. i will pay you for an hour for coming in here today,” and once i calmed down a little i realized what an objectively funny situation that was so i stayed. i chose to request my birthday off not because i had plans but because i figured out he’d be the closing lead that day and i could not stand his ass. the day after my birthday i found out one of my 2 favorite leads was leaving and the other one had shaved his head kendall roy style. three hours later a pipe at the starbucks exploded and flooded everywhere and ruined everybody’s shoes except for mine because mine already fucking sucked. later that week we lost our last cart.

they threw a party on the former closing lead’s last day for both her and the former hr guy and everyone brought gifts for her and no one brought gifts for him. and he seemed super offended that i in particular hadn’t gotten him anything so he stopped me right before i clocked out for lunch and went, “holly are you gonna miss me at all? even a little bit?” and i was like, “yeah, i am gonna miss you, and you know why? because i love complaining and you give me more to complain about than everybody else who works here combined. and [his replacement] has NEVER given me ANYTHING to complain about EVER.” it was a lie though. i do not miss his ass. there was an incident where someone actually slipped on a banana. we thought it was just the peel but when i investigated i saw it was the whole banana. half the morning team including multiple leads caught covid and so did the interim hr guy we were supposed to have for two weeks. they finally sent us baskets with wheels after like three weeks of having no baskets and no carts whatsoever and the shoplifters had a field day. satan took a shit in our elevator and had to be removed from the store. i stayed late one night to help out & found a package of moldy rotten deli meats that were a brand we don’t even sell just sitting on the shelf. the power went out for like 2 hours and we had to close and the leads let somebody out when their shift ended and forgot to lock the door again and satan got in while we weren’t even open and immediately began stealing. a guy smashed a can of meat against the shelf until it exploded and also pissed in a starbucks cup and on the floor. i broke the world record for listening to “i started a joke” by the bee gees. and that is literally just what i can remember off the top of my head!

#my job wrapped

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thrill-seeker-if · 1 year

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I posted 1,090 times in 2022

775 posts created (71%)

315 posts reblogged (29%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thrill-seeker-if

@manonamora-if

@king-of-autumn

@hauntthebodies

@narrativefoiltrope

I tagged 919 of my posts in 2022

Only 16% of my posts had no tags

#not if related - 424 posts

#thrill seeker if - 133 posts

#ro asks - 101 posts

#ch: n - 96 posts

#ch: oli - 90 posts

#anon - 84 posts

#ch: hannie - 83 posts

#ask aalaa - 74 posts

#lovely anon <3 - 45 posts

#<3 - 42 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#we were like reviewing our tor as we go into another work year and she had been showing our plan for the next year and as we're talking she

My Top Posts in 2022:

Please don't write another IF. You're already lazy enough writing this one.

I don't really know what to say to this one. But, then again, I don't really owe you any sort of explanation. You have no idea who I am or what I've been through these last few months, so I really don't know where you get off of that you can speak to me so harshly.

I have very little time to myself, and I am making this IF for free. Between this, I've been helping my Ukranian family seek refuge here. I am paying for their stay. I'm working and studying, too. I get very little free time for this IF. I understand if you don't want to read it, or any of my other WIPs, but I don't think you have the right to talk to anyone this way regardless. I do not owe my time to you. I am not your personal content machine.

If you think you can do better, I truly encourage you to try. Maybe you can take this stick out of your ass while you're at it.

71 notes - Posted April 18, 2022

I’ve collaborated with the incredible @aikhako again for N’s birthday celebration! They've, of course, blown it out of the water yet again!

One thing I'm excited to announce for this celebration as well... I have finally moved the demo from inkle to twine! I have edited chapter 1, so it should hopefully flow better now!

You can play the game from this link. Hope you guys are having a great day!

Also, make sure to check out Aikhako on insta, they post more often there!

75 notes - Posted April 12, 2022

this is so funny to me.... i love blade so much but he really went out and spoke about their trauma and was like 'and i.... yeah me too i guess!'

91 notes - Posted November 10, 2022

5000 views and 2500 plays celebration!

Hello everyone! I actually can't believe it, but today, we passed 5000 views and 2500 browser plays for Thrill Seeker!!

First of all: thank you guys so much. I literally wouldn't be here without you guys. The support I've gotten from you amazing folks is staggering. I really want to thank ALL of you for supporting Thrill Seeker, you guys are so lovely and to be honest, the love I've gotten here has gotten me through some really tough times. The friends I've made here are absolutely wonderful.

I love talking to you guys, seeing your art and hearing your theories, and I love hearing what you look forward to. Thank you for listening to my ramblings and being so lovely!! I'm so happy to have people like you engaging with Thrill Seeker and I appreciate every single one of you.

So, to thank you all, we're going to have a little celebration!!

Until then I’d just like to do something fun for you all! Ther are three There will be three prizes for everyone who wishes to participate

1st prize: Portrait of your MC and preferred RO & Longer Drabble created with your preferred RO

2nd prize: Medium length drabble written with your character & smaller portrait of your preferred RO

3rd prize: Option to create your own character who, although small, will play a role giving information to the MC & moodboard of preferred character

To win, all you have to do is reblog or comment on this post (not like!!) and you'll be in!!! This will be open to anyone until about mid September, so you all have plenty of time!

I hope you guys enjoy!! Thank you guys so, so much for sticking with me and giving so much love to Thrill Seeker!

See the full post

93 notes - Posted July 26, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Your favorite IFs? I don't remember if you have already answered something like this and I'm looking for something to get addicted to.

I've actually been looking for the post I made about this exactly, but here's a bunch more!

@reincarnation-if - A RESURRECTION STORY, BABY!!! I love the author AND the story, I'm totally obsessed with it!! The demo isn't out yet, but I literally can't wait!!

@manonamora-if - I cannot recommend this author enough. Check out her IFs here. I don't even know how to begin describing how amazing she is-- it seems like she can literally do any genre!

@attollogame - I'm sure everyone knows this incredible if but, if you don't, definitely check them out RIGHT NOW! They're going to celebrate their two year anniversary soon, so this is the perfect chance to read the work and find out more about this awesome game!!

@jaunefleurwrites - another one I mention a lot. But she has so many amazing WIPS and IFs and I'm not sure if all my audience knows about it!! You can check Jaune's masterpost for all their amazing IFs (my favorite is definitely A World Without You!! There's just a certain warmth in Jaune's writing that I absolutely love!)

@magiciansvoyage - Yet again someone who shows up on the blog a lot-- I'm getting my favoritism out of the way, don't worry. Arlo is such a lovely writer and person, and Magician's Voyage is easily one of my favorite ifs. Arlo's writing is so immersive and I love fantasy, so easy rec from me!

@parkerlyn - The Nameless is literally one of the best IFs out there and you are missing out if you're not reading it. They are also celebrating their second anniversary soon so send them some love!!

@anathemafiction - If you're looking to buy an amazing, immersive game, this is the one to get! It's fully released, incredible quality, and you can download it on mobile or desktop. I would definitely recommend checking them out!

@thefallendivine - I love betrayal stories. You play as the heir to heaven and hell, but your family has been killed by your peers. You're in a situation where you're not sure who to trust anymore. I absolutely love these kinds of stories!! I think if you like Thrill Seeker, you'll enjoy this is!

@sevensdeadly-if - You get to interact and romance the seven deadly sins. How much better can it get, man??? Is there anything more I need to say to sell it?? Chapter one was released recently, so an excellent time to read it.

@nextinline-if - Are you looking for an if with DRAMA?? ROYALTY?? A STORY THAT MAKES YOU LOOK WITHIN YOURSELF, THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO BE A GOOD RULER??? then look no further than this amazing game!! Constantine has my heart and I will love him till the end of time, so if you do play, pick someone else, because he is MINE!

@lifesupreme-if - There are defiitely not enough sci-fi if's out there, and this story is based in the world of Cyberpunk 2077, so it was an automatic win in my eyes.

@when-life-gives-you-lemonssss - This is nothing like Thrill Seeker, and I love it. It's a cute slice of life with a bunch of awesome ROs. I love domestic games, and this covers all the boxes in the cute game checklist!

@whenbodiescollide - when i saw the synopsis, it immediately caught my attention. the entire aesthetic of the blog plays in so well with the story that i can't recommend it enough!!

@vendetta-if - another awesome synopsis bro. I love revenge stories, and this is probably the best IF you're gonna find of it, baby!

@lacewing-if - Their if doesn't have a demo yet, but I already love the premise. Keith has my entire heart and I can't wait until I can get to romance him properly LIUHDFSSDFHUI

@thehunt-if - Another concept I love a lot-- you play as a hunter for supernatural beings!! But then!!! YOU GET POSSESSED BY SOMETHING YOU HUNTED, AND NOW YOU HAVE TO WALK A MILE IN THEIR SHOES!! i cannot stress how much I love this hehe

@hummingbird-games - Moreso a VN, but still such a cute game and I just love it sm!!! The art is so gorgeous and it's just so nicely done!!

@if-whenthesunrises & @if-mirrormine - both are excellent stories!! The lovely author is on a hiatus right now, but I would still recommend checking out their work!!

@unwilling-souls-if - The premise is just so insanely good I can't even explain it. Check it out and you'll get it, LMAIUHDSFUHDFIU. Xander-- watch out. I'm coming for you.

There are way too many talented authors to mention in the word limit, so let me know if you want a part three!! Thank you for the ask Eva <3

339 notes - Posted August 23, 2022

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#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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radkindoffeminist · 2 years

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read your bio and came to bully you anyways lol ❤️ imagine being so narrow-minded and brainless that you hate the idea of people being themselves and living their lives and feeling oh so threatened by the existence of women who are different from you.

what defines a woman to you? a vagina? well, what about your "anti-porn" stance? why would you reduce a woman to her genitals? isn't that what you TERFs hate, when women are reduced to being walking vaginas, as men often do? "a woman is someone who can carry a child" what about women who are infertile? women with PCOS, ovarian cancer, etc etc. would you shun females with body/facial hair due to a natural excess of testosterone? how then could you tell a trans woman from a cis woman with excess testosterone? and don't be like "well obviously i could pick out a man in a dress from a woman" because a lot of trans women are not obvious! blaire white? jamie clayton? laverne cox? i don't know about you, but i didn't know they were trans until i was explicitly told that they were.

we can talk biology all you want, but the fact is: every single individual is unique. even identical twins. and not everyone has the same amount of estrogen and testosterone (of which everyone has both of! that's right! even as a biological female, you have *some* testosterone! that's just how it works! and it's there to maintain your physical health. and as we've established, some women have Too Much testosterone, and as trans women prove, sometimes that excess of testosterone in women results in a penis forming while they're in their parent's womb)

go read a fucking book you blockheaded plebeian. biology is way more complicated than what you learned in 3rd grade.

p.s. i encourage you to google any of this shit <3 educate yourself. don't be an idiot.

Ooof, a lot post of stupidity. Be glad that you found me on a high energy day.

imagine being so narrow-minded and brainless that you hate the idea of people being themselves and living their lives

What is it with the ‘these people are just trying to live their lives’ rhetoric? Realising that this whole idea was fucking bullshit was one of the things which made me peak! How can you say that they’re just trying to live their lives when they are removing safe spaces for women by shifting to self-ID as standard and attacking rape crisis shelters for not complying with this ideal; continually attacking and insult people (but lesbians especially) for refusing to change their sexuality to include trans people and forcing conversion therapy ideas onto them so that they’re ‘inclusive’ (receipts at @tra-receipts); and forcing literally everyone to change their language about issues related to the female body to be ‘more inclusive’ despite the fact that women hate this language because it is degrading and misogynistic and despite it being ‘for inclusivity’ it is almost exclusively used to label women and not men (receipts at @misogynistic-inclusive-language)? Please explain exactly how people just want to live their lives in peace when all of shit is going down and affecting so many other people constantly.

feeling oh so threatened by the existence of women who are different from you.

No part of me is threatened by the existence of women who are different from me. I am, however, threatened by the thought of males being allowed in safe spaces which were designed to protect me for men/male violence just because these men say they’re women. And I’m offended by the idea that some males put on some makeup and dresses and think that makes them women and that they are actually worse off because of that, despite never being socialised the same as me and never having the fear of sexual violence/harassment hanging over them and so many other things which are inherent to womanhood

what defines a woman to you? a vagina?

What defines a woman? Adult human female which means that yes, women have a vagina. What do you define as being a woman, anon? A feeling maybe? Or the debunked brain sex theory? Or maybe you're not even that smart and think it's just being a woman. In any case, woman means adult human female and there is no other coherent definition which has ever been provided (receipts @woman-defined), though you're welcome to prove me wrong. So maybe you should tell me why we need to change all our language and laws and safe spaces to accommodate people based on them ‘feeling’ like an incoherent concept.

well, what about your "anti-porn" stance?

What about my anti-porn stance? How dare I hate an industry which is notoriously abusive towards women and which is linked with misogyny and sexual violence in the men who consume it? Idk, seems like a reasonable stance to take 🤷🏼‍♀️ (Sources and further reading @antiporn-activist. One of the best users for this topic.)

why would you reduce a woman to her genitals? isn't that what you TERFs hate, when women are reduced to being walking vaginas, as men often do?

You seem to both understand and not understand what it means to be reduced to something so let me explain since you obviously need the clarity. Being ‘reduced to’ something means that you are seen as only being that thing or only useful because of that thing. Radfems hate being reduced to their organs and reproductive capabilities so by that we mean we hate it when men say that our only purpose in life should be to reproduce and that that’s the only thing we’re good for.

Saying that a woman has a vagina isn’t reducing her to her vagina. I am saying that it is a part of her body which she has. Much like if I said that lesbians only date women. I am not saying that lesbians are sex-obsessed weirdos who ogle every woman they see because they can’t control themselves and reducing them to their sexuality but rather that stating a characteristic which is inherent to that group. Hope you are now able to understand the difference and why radfems don’t reduce women to their vaginas!

(Side note: Do you not think it’s a little ironic to say that radfems are the one ‘reducing women’ to their vagina and organs when it’s the TRAs who believe that we should be using terms like ‘vagina haver’ and ‘uterus owner’ to describe women?)

"a woman is someone who can carry a child" what about women who are infertile? women with PCOS, ovarian cancer, etc etc.

Mate, I literally have PCOS so don’t fuck with me about this. Not a single radfem in the four years that I have been on this site has ever told me that I am less of a woman or not a woman because I have a PCOS. Not one. Ever. Many TRAs have however implied that I’m not fully female due to a fucking medical condition but I digress. Radfems do not exclude women with medical conditions and radfems have literally never defined being a woman as being able to carry a child. I don’t even know why you bothered putting quotation marks around something no radfem has ever said. As I said before, a woman is an adult human female. PCOS and ovarian cancer sufferers/survivors are still fucking female.

would you shun females with body/facial hair due to a natural excess of testosterone?

Nope.

how then could you tell a trans woman from a cis woman with excess testosterone? and don't be like "well obviously i could pick out a man in a dress from a woman" because a lot of trans women are not obvious! blaire white? jamie clayton? laverne cox? i don't know about you, but i didn't know they were trans until i was explicitly told that they were.

Because the vast majority of trans people are clockable due to having distinctly male features. Are there some trans women who I cannot clock? Yeah, I’ll admit that. After years on hormones, multiple surgeries, masses of makeup, and voice coaching there are a handful of trans women who I would not be able to clock and haven’t been able to clock. But you’re a fucking idiot if you think the vast, vast majority of trans women are completely unclockable because most don’t have access to the money to do all the things which would allow them to appear like a regular woman. Hell, some don’t even want to. A very small handful of very rich trans people being able to pass well doesn’t discount that the average trans woman cannot pass.

(But seriously? You couldn’t clock Laverne Cox? Are you dumb?)

go read a fucking book you blockheaded plebeian.

Nah, don’t like reading books that much

biology is way more complicated than what you learned in 3rd grade.

I fucking love this argument. Actually got an ask about this the other day, funnily enough. I thought that sex and gender were supposed to be two completely separate, though slightly linked, concepts? So while you spew complete bullshit about disorders of sexual development, how about you tell what the existence of intersex conditions has to do with gender? Because seriously, I don’t understand. ‘Hey a very small percentage of people are born with XY chromosomes but appear externally to be female due to this rare medical condition which means that this fully grown man with a penis can call himself a woman’? Seriously, I do not understand how because ‘biology is way more complicated than what [I] learned in 3rd grade’ that means that males can call themselves women and we need to cope. Please explain the logic here.

p.s. i encourage you to google any of this shit <3 educate yourself. don't be an idiot.

I have spent a lot of time educating myself of trans people and trans issues but guess what? Still gender critical and still have not seen a coherent definition of what a woman which includes trans women! Also really don’t appreciate having people talk down to me and telling me that my view can only come from a place of ignorance just because they refuse to educate themselves on what gender critical views actually are so will go along with any lies that they’re told. Your message to me was not trying to educate me and you didn’t show the most basic understanding of radfem view points yet you’re going to sit there and tell me that I’m the uneducated one? Damn, that’s fucking bold of you. How about you start by reading the blogs that I have tagged above, coherently defining what a woman is, and then educating yourself on the most basic radfem views?

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francis-writes · 1 year

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CW: Death mentioned.

This is a very weird thought but I have been thinking about Watcher AU Claude Frollo.

So Watchers are essentially a demi-god like creature within Minecraft fan lore, more specifically Minecraft Youtuber fan lore, stemming from Grian. It’s also interesting that Watchers’ Biblical reference implies that Watcher!Frollo is a sort of fallen angel.

Watchers created a world in which people have three lives. (Yes this is a 3rd Life SMP series AU lol) When people are on their last life, they become bloodthirsty and hostile. Watchers created the world to prey on the anguish from all the betrayals and all the bloodshed. Watcher!Frollo, craving human connection, decided to go against Watchers’ code and joined the world himself (watchers are forbidden to interfere their own creation).

So in my little Minecraft YouTube series rip-off AU, Frollo met other Disney villains there. The villains have no magical powers other than anything Minecraft mechanics grant them (including Frollo, who was one of the creators of this cursed world). Frollo accidentally shot Jafar (on his 1st life) to death when Jafar was chased down by a pack of skeletons. He felt guilty over this, deciding to “serve his life” to Jafar until Frollo loses his first life as well.

……then Jafar accidentally jumped off an cliff and there goes his second life. Frollo is forced to become a mercenary of rampaging Jafar (last life curse), thinking to himself every day that creating this cursed world and joining it himself is the worst idea ever while doing all the killing, torturing, and burning with Jafar. The duo is chaotic and unstoppable despite Jafar foolishly threw his first two lives and Frollo is basically his reluctant sidekick and they secretly hate each other and it’s toxic relationship at it finest but they can’t leave each other.

When Frollo eventually lost his own first life with an arrow to his heart at a worldwide war, his first reaction is not “screw it, I finally lost my first life so by my own promise, I am FREE from Jafar”……NOPE he goes straight back to their base in the desert for another mayhem and more tnt minecarts.

Thank you again for my weird fan fic idea. I know your blog normally don’t do non-romantic ideas here, but still want to share with you.

Thanks for sharing! It's very interesting, even though I am not a specialist in terms on Minecraft (I'm more a sims person and recently I made Frollo a serial killer in my little sims world but nvm)

Also... Frollo and Jafar is literally my favourite duo. I have them both on my wallpaper. I don't know what do they have in common (old evil men?) but I always like to think about them working together... or just annoying each other

#judge claude frollo #claude frollo #frollo #jafar

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borderlineteen · 11 months

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I was recently hospitalized for suicidal thoughts for the 3rd time in the past 400 days, and this is the only time I've come home feeling like I've made a difference and am ready to grow. I would like to start at the very beginning of my journey in which I have navigated for the years.

Since I was born I've been attached to my mother at the hip, which is completely normal for a child until I was 4 years old, having full on panic attacks at the thought of my mother dying when it was completely irrelevant to the situation. When I started to go into school I would have episodes of screaming and crying everymorning before school and mother and many doctors thought I had been autistic or something had gone wrong in the early development of my brain. It had gotten to the point in elementary school that I was still crying every morning and was sent to the nurses office most literally everyday because I would work myself up to puking everyday.

This was kept pretty consistent until the first time I was sent the hospital for suicidal ideation, I was 11 years old and felt like I had nowhere to go in life. Even talking and sitting at the dinner table during holidays felt like a battle and always ended in severe panic attacks that rocked me and the relationship between me and my family.

Many people conspirised I was just spoiled or was a brat when in actually I had no idea what was going on myself. I distinctly remember being 11 and writing terrible things all over my body, "you don't deserve her," "[my name] should be dead," etc. Luckily, throughout covid, I didn't have as many issues as I wasn't actually interacting with anything that could trigger me.

It was only after covid that things started get really bad, about 9th grade. In the first semester of high-school things ok, I got in trouble for blurring and things like that but nothing to surprising for a freshman. It started in 2nd semester that things had really started to go downhill. I remember feeling empty all the time like I could never get a grip of who I was, what my name was, who I liked, who I hated, what my feelings should be. I broke multiple great relationships and ruined trust between many people.

I was bullied severely until I had decided the only way I could get out of this was to cut my hair off, died it bright pink and tell myself to kill myself. I was sent to the hospital that night and from there transported to a high risk inpatient facility an hour away through an ambulance.

When I got there, I didn't do much that helped myself. It was 40 suicidal, ill kids in a room with to little staff. I've seen someone cut themselves and be sedated and restrained in the middle of the day. This is only the first of 3 hospilizations I will be continuing my perspective of my own life in the next blog.

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misscammiedawn · 1 year

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What is your favorite angry song? Gets your heart pumping angry, dancing around angry and maybe screaming angry.

Thank you for asking, Linny. To my Tumblr audience, I have been quiet about it on this side but I am healing from major surgery and am bed-ridden for the next 3-5 weeks. Linny is sending me a number of asks to help me pass the time.

This question deserves a full answer:

When I was a teenager I used to be big into Papa Roach and Linkin Park. My Rush obsession existed, of course, that is a constant with me... but Rush don't do angry songs. Given I was Going Through Some Shit back then, listening to Hybrid Theory a lot was good for my deeply angry part. The dominant portion of my soul back then that needed to survive being kicked out (twice) and navigate having to work 12+ hour shifts at my temp job to keep myself from sinking further into the rocks of rock bottom.

There was always something so soothing about just getting that catharsis of screaming out via miming along as my disc span inside the work computer. 12 pound disc, 6 pound headphones. A worthy purchase at a time when shutting off my brain and just doing my job was needed.

I think Papa Roach's Infest album got the most play and Broken Home was my favorite at that rage fueled part of my life.

I mellowed out a lot in the past 20 years and these days most of my "angry" music is just BPD music so when I am hurting and upset I tend towards Left At London. Nat's music is trans-BPD sicko mode music and her anthem is Pills & Good Advice, a song about being discharged from a mental facility and the odyssey of trying to get by, being understood and the vague acceptance that none of this is going to go away and no one can save you from it from the outside.

Kudzu is also one I like to project on. The song is more from the perspective of addiction with the kudzu/addictive substance "taking over your garden" but every time I listen and hear "can I stay one more night until I go home" I think literal terms and remember the multiple people who have hosted me in the past and how I used their charity until it all went away. How many people had I selfishly used up all I could use from them until they ran out of love and patience for me?

I listen to that song and get angry at me.

Which isn't what I typically want.

With Pills & Good Advice it is more cathartic. Particularly the climax of the song:

Start to climb, and then I get a little higher (Higher)

I'm a coward, it don't matter what I do (Higher)

From "I can't do it anymore" to "I can't do it, I can't do it"

Told myself I wanna die

So how am I supposed to prove it now?

Spend too many of my minutes getting higher (Higher)

I've attempted way too much to even count (Higher)

I've been committed, but committed to the people that I love

And if I try to love myself, I guess that I could live forever crying

Also the Blacknwhite single is really good for conveying what Splitting feels like within BPD.

(I can find another)

But I'll never find another you again

I've been splitting 'cause it's better than admitting

That it's something that I can't control

I was livid, what you did was nothing easily forgiven

Yet I couldn't let go

And I bet all your friends say, "I'm glad that she's gone"

Then you have Screen Violence by CHVRCHES which is an album that just resonates with me and how I felt between 2019 and 2021 when I burned my life to the ground a 3rd time. I am not proud of my actions... but god it feels good when you can listen to a song and feel like you may not have done the "right" things, but you did something that someone, somewhere can understand well enough to put in to poetry.

Anger being my core emotion is not something I am proud of either. But it's better spent on music than on people.

#camden asks #recovery asks #linny bee good

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bruiisedpetals-a · 1 year

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long NON RP RANT — about work bc the audacity!?!??! tldr: a girl who had applied and interviewed and confirmed her trial shift to be a barista last week and was V EXCITED so we cancelled another person for her trial .... showed up, said hi, chatted a bit, had a look inside, then said she was going for a walk to look around the area bc she isnt a local, and within 5 MINUTES (literally. five) ghosted, disappeared, text my boss and said “yeah nah bye”, and left me alone handling the whole place. cue endless work for me w double the usual customers, and a shift that lasted three hours longer that it should have bc of the ghosting.

rel context: i work in a small coffee & bagel place, two people on one shift: one on coffee & point of sale and another to be the cook, we also have two online food delivery providers so we take orders in person and from two apps + i’m a barista and have line cook kitchen prac & experience so am actually a ‘cook’ ig?

so i mentioned in my post when i was half asleep yesterday that i had a new person coming into my workplace for a trial today, so i stayed late to prep for weekend trade + restock stuff, and came in early to set up everything just in case. we were v busy yesterday with food as it was so i had a lot to restock, and w mothers day tomorrow everything needs to be topped up more-so. that a lot of work by itself to be honest but manageable in between cooking, esp when you have an extra set of hands when its quiet to help. look if you have seen any cooking show you might see that set up, prep and pack down take THE LONGEST ok.

— our permanent staff consists of me and K, we have two other locations so we get help from Z and J, and they can usually cover the shifts that K and i can’t (eg. K can’t do saturdays, i cant do every 3rd tuesday) but they manage other locations so they are not available without prior notice. so basically the only person who was available to work today was me, even my boss was busy moving house w his wife, 4mo and two under 8yo’s. —

this morning i’m at work at 7am, turn on things etc, set up my cooking stuff, open the coffee machine, nothing crazy. at abt 7:45am im chillin outside having a coffee and a smoke and someone walks up and it turns out to be the trial girl. we chat a bit etc, i show her inside and the machine (she’s a barista and i’m the cook on shift) — i say that i just heard from my boss myself, bc she had spoken w him earlier that morning, and he’s on the way and should be here within 5-7 mins ***technically we open at 8am but i was waiting for my boss but had checked the time to keep track & i had just text my boss back so i saw the timestamp***

so at 7:59am i head inside after i finish my smoke and she’s going to have a look where i told her there is free close parking for next time bc she took the train, at 8:04am my boss walks in and goes “WOW IT’S 8:04AM AND SHE’S NOT HERE lmao” (he did not yell it he’s a g - that’s just how i knew what the time was alksjfhg) and i go “no she’s just having a look down [street] bc of the parking i literally saw her a few mins ago” and proceed to open the doors etc. meanwhile i see my boss on the phone calling her, after a moment he comes over with a Whole “i cant fkn believe this” Face on while he’s on the phone. i’m thinking “??? i hope trial girl didn’t get lost in these lil crossover streets damn”

(it’s 8:07am, from now the customers start. they DO NOT STOP until at least 11am, it was at least double the normal turnover of profits during that time so thats ur ref for how BUSY it got)

boss goes “ur not gonna believe this” and show me the mssg from trial girl who basically has said “hi i went to ur shop, and i had a wander around the area and its just not good enough for me so i’m on my way home”. she’s GONE. in those five minutes. she got up, lied to me, and was at the nearby train station leaving. boss is floored and i’m like !>?!??!?!@#!#?who IN THE FK does this?!?!? but the customers so *professional me is present rn*

between her and boss there’s a little back and forth (text, she wont answer any calls) where he literally pleads with her bc there is NO ONE who can come in an assist me and she confirmed yesterday and she WAS HERE, she continues to be like “mmmm well ik that we discussed this and i said that i would be here and its been set for days and i applied LAST WEEK etc. but... no sorry im going back to bed” and then blocks him.

& this whole thing takes place between

7:59AM — 8:07AM.

i was there from 7am - 4:35pm / my usual saturday is 7:45am - 2:30pm

WHO DOES THAT. WHO IS THAT UNPROFESSIONAL. WHO??? WHOMST??? SHE WAS SO FKN RUDE I WAS liVID. LIKE. why LEAD us ALL ON. we all need to make a living do U THINk he can afford to lose a whole day of trade?? he’s got a whole FAmILY and his wife cant work rn bc she’s just had their 3rd child. i live PaYCHECK to PAYcheck. like this is life this isnt a game???? you are 29YRS OLD why cant u act grown

#ooc. out of ink ⋯ skye posts #( this is long bc it's literally my stream of thought and i needed to get it out of my head alkrjhfg )

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hypaalicious · 2 years

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I honestly don't even need to dress up AS the characters to be happy. I just want their clothes 🤣🤣🤣 Ignis especially. I just want to feel that fancy 🤣🤣🤣🤣 but yeah I've seen all the crap people give cosplayers these days and it really irks me. Like. If you don't like it, move on? It's not like you HAVE to look at them? And 90% of the jerks couldn't even do it better anyway.

Omg yes please. And Ignis has to wrestle with the logic that Noct might still be alive somewhere despite all the facts. And Gladio has to work through his emotions better this time damn it! He needs and deserves the same amount of growth as everyone else!

Exactly! Like. The female mcs can be fun without being annoying. Soft without being weak willed. And cool without being emotionless. Like come on. If your males can be, so can your females! There's literally no reason it has to be treated differently.

I agree. That's why I said I don't think I'd count Noct as "broody". I've just seen a lot of people outside the Fandom call him emo and broody and stuff and I'm like. Nah. He had legit reasons for his pain. And he didn't wallow in it ALL the time. Just the second half. BECAUSE AFTER ALTISSIA HE DIDN'T CATCH A DAMN BREAK TO BE ABLE TO COME BACK FROM EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED.

It sounds horrible but I love blind!Ignis and Nocts growth to much to not play to the end each time. Not like I'm happy that Iggy is blind but the way it affects the story and the way he takes it in strides really impresses me from a narrative POV. It hurts. But it's beautiful in a way, if that makes sense. I'm on my 3rd new game+ in like.. A little over a month I think? And I'm gonna go to the very end again 🤣 even if the alt ending is the only true end to me lolol

I kinda want many fictional characters’ clothes, but I fear it’s gone be like… how something looks good on a mannequin and then I buy it and it looks like garbage on me 😭 Because I mean let’s face it, they have the power of anime on their side 😂 Some of these outfits stay plastered to the right spots on their body at all times, some defy physics in ways we don’t realize until it turns out you need body tape to keep some shit looking good… stuff like that.

I think that’s why I like FFX-2; it was an entirely woman-led FF and it was just a group of chicks kicking ass with full personalities. And while Yuna was focused on reuniting with Tidus, that wasn’t her whole thing. Idk why Squenix can no longer do that 😂

Noct in the OG concept was broody and emo, and tbh I am so glad they didn’t go with that. Yeah, it would have been in line with what folks apparently wanted, but I’m over the stoic protagonist trope. Seeing the boys hang out and just be a bunch of dudes on a road trip was a great choice, imo! And no offense to Lunafreya, I’m so glad that the romance was an afterthought in the game, cause tbh square doesn’t really do romances well enough to shoehorn it in almost every damn game.

You are stronger than me cause I can’t take the pain and the disharmony the group had after Altissia 🥲 I know it gets better but I was in PAIN going through all that! I could only play through the whole game once, and the DLC once. I still haven’t played Ardyn’s DLC and I highly doubt I’ll go back to do it at this point either, it’s been years 😂 But the good thing about being on tumblr when it dropped is that I pretty much got the gist of it all through gifs and screenshots and discourse so I don’t feel I missed out in the end.

#you know what FF I have played over and over tho? FFX LOL #bought it for the switch and went right on ahead and sunk hundreds of hours into it again #redoing the whole sphere grid like I ain’t got sense #I also did the same with FFXII #I think those two games are my comfort FF’s or something idk #not so Anon ask

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rotten-rodentia · 2 years

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Angry ranting

Yesterday I missed a dose of my meds, and I got triggered by seeing one of the ppl involved jn the divorce last year and went spiraling into trying to find info on all of those ppl which just upsets me more

And since I hadn't taken my meds, my brain wouldn't chill for even a second And then I was kept awake bc I was hungry as hell.

Fell asleep at 5 am, woke up at like 9:40. Less than 5 hrs

Filled out a bunch of medical info I need for my endocrinologist, and tried to order my insurance card for another damn hour on the phone with a robot

Got contacted by manager asking if I could clock in extra early for the 3rd time this week, usually I'm like hell yeah extra money but I'm glad I didn't go to work early

Work was so damn busy today that I didn't get to cleaning the lobby until it was almost time to close anyway. Both trashcans were overflowing and there was a huge stack of trays, I started taking out trash so it would STOP overflowing but then right on time to piss me off some customers come in and I HAVE TO HELP THEM CUZ THATS ALSO MY JOB but I had to finish the trash

But if I make them wait, then I suck at my job cuz were fast food and its totally my fault that I'm the only person in charge of cleaning the lobby, 3 bathrooms, serving indoor customers, serving call in and online orders, And serving Doordash which also pisses me off cuz we'll get several Doordasg orders and the drivers like to come in super early and just stand around, or sometimes leave if we take too long. BUDDY THW APP SAYSI HAVE 15 MINUTES TO MAKE THE ORDER, I'M NOT LATE UR FUCKING EARLY. But also sometimes I am late, BC INDOOR CUSTOMERS ARE PRIORITY.

Anyway why the fuck are jobs like this? Why am I doing the work of multiple people just bc my boss wants to keep the percentage of labor under 25%?

They always schedule 1 lobby cashier to serve customers inside/doordash/call in/online orders, and 2 drive through bc drive through is the busiest

Oh and guess who has to stock all the drive through sides too?the ones for easy grabbing in the fridge? FUCKING ME.

Sweeping the lobby and the kitchen, scrubbing off the front line and the display windows, OH AND IM A BACK UP DISHWASHER.

And then my dad can't pick me up and wants me to somehow uber both me and my sister, who is at a completely different location and got off work at a different time.

Oh and apparently that one coworker who goes "Deadname this needs done" when I'm in the middle of doing something she already asks, every single minute she does that, not only is that one of the reasons other coworkers don't like her (the nagging instead of waiting for us to be done with something or even just writing a list), but our coworkers have literally corrected her on my name and she still does it. She's not even a manager either and she just bosses everyone around cuz she was SUPPOSED to train us (which doesn't happen at this establishment btw)

Highlights of my day: I saw a planned parenthood worker which just immediately made me happy, and I told her how much I appreciate them and she said that made her day bc usually when someone notices the planned parenthood logo they think or say bad things about them. Also my uber driver had a van decked out in halloween decorations which was awesome, she's my favorite uber driver now. It felt like riding with family or a friend she was so sweet

#max #rant #angry #ik I'm so overstimulated #actually autistic #adhd

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gh0ulishbae · 2 months

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i hate that the more i try to make friends, the more impossible it becomes. i’m a single mom, i am extremely poor, living check to check and drowning in debt. i work from home, do remote schooling, and suffer from chronic pain. idk how tf to make friends, i am also a late in life diagnosed AuDHD(33). i have no friends, been single for 6yrs. never have a friendships/relationship last longer then a year. i have searched all over the internet, reddit, social media, tried every app i could find to meet people in any capacity. and i’ll start talking to people, only for them to ghost me before i commit their name to memory. i am struggling financially, emotionally, physically. i’m always in pain and it is so tough to get out of bed most days. but my family makes me feel like i’m exaggerating my pain or just don’t care. so i feel more and more isolated each day. and it’s extremely frustrating and heartbreaking when you have no one. not even someone online to randomly send memes too. i kept trying to reach out to people online or keep in contact with the few i meet irl. to no avail. so my depression just worsens everyday. my meltdowns are occurring multiple times a day. i cannot breathe. i just needed someone. not even someone to vent to. just someone to be my friend. so i didn’t feel alone going through everything. to make all this pain and suffering worth it. but it isn’t. i’ve even tried posting here on social media literally BEGGING for someone and my literal screams for help get ignored. i failed my exam for the 3rd time yesterday, minutes prior i learned i was going to be dropped from school for nonpayment. and the day before i learned that i have to be worried about a heart murmur. and all i wanted was to just not think. instead i broke down completely i smashed my cane into the floor until my carpal tunnel flared up worse. and then just walked outside with the intent to walk into a lake. but everything was so far away and it ended up raining. so i cried in the rain, hoping that someone who run me over. i’ve tried helplines, phone, text, and chat. they ALWAYS go straight to “you just need a support system. you need someone to rely on.” every time i tell them i have no one it’s always like, “not even family or coworkers?” like no asshole, if i had ANY type of support system i wouldn’t be talking to you. i’ve been hospitalized for an attempt and it was like 6k$ for a FORCED five day stay. and while i was in there, the dr saw that i OD’d with my antidepressants and saw i was prescribed vitamin d and told me that i would have been more successful ODing on vitamin d. but locking me up and force feeding me pills wont change the fact that i am never going to be good enough. the people that i end up letting in after being lowkey harassed to be in my life they all abused me. i just don’t know what else to do. this is the 3rd Reddit i’ve created and probably going to end up deleting bc i am invisible here too. why is it illegal to commit suicide? it’s my fucking life, and it ain’t hurting anyone. no one cares about. i am better off dead.

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diaryoftheunidropout · 2 months

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DAY 365

A year. A year since I dropped out. A whole year since "Day 1", March 3rd 2023.

It's crazy how fast time has passed and how many things have happened and how, in a way, not much has changed.

I have grown very fond of Queen these past few weeks, not that I wasn't into their music before, but this is just another level of admiration. I've been to the UK many, many times, and to the US too. I've been Logan's WWG. I've had Alice tag me in their story literally yesterday, thanking me for the book I gave them. I've met new people, and I've lost friends. I've had dreams, doubts, moments of hope and others of despair. I've realized how important the arts and culture were to me and how I wanted a job connected to that, perhaps just not on the artist's side due to my clear lack of talent and abilities (at least in my own opinion). I've also very recently realized that finding a job in that field would prove extremely difficult, as there are more people wanting to work in it than jobs available, and the degrees requirements often feel out of my reach.

So I still don't really know what my plan is now. When I dropped out, I wanted to take a few weeks off, then find a job, anything, and then go back to my studies by September, probably a business school. Turns out, I never felt well enough to work until August, and by then I'd given up on the idea of going back to studying for very long (probably around May). Found a job in September, felt so miserable that I quit at the end of the third day, and I've been trying to find some stability since then, and also a new, better plan. And I feel very stuck.

A completely delusional part of me is convinced I am destined to do great things and to be a star, in one way or another. A photographer? A writer? Something else? Nothing, perhaps? I often fantasize about writing a great book that people will love, and readers coming up to me asking for an autograph, and Alice reading it and loving it and realizing it I wrote it for them and us becoming friends and maybe someday having a very special bond, because we are soulmates and it was meant to be, right? And all along, it was always meant to be this way and my dad was never disappointed in me or my life choices because he always knew, as one now-omniscient being does, that I would do Great things.

I'm writing now and everything flows and comes so naturally, and I wish it were like this when I write fiction. I wish I'd have the motivation, the will, the determination. I know it's already in me, but it's buried so deep...

I think reading about Queen has just reinforced these illusions in my mind. How they started from nothing and built this incredible career and carved out outstanding lives for themselves. I want that, and I'm capable of that. I want to think that way every day, and even when I don't or can't, I want to pretend that I think this way until I convince myself again that I do.

My dad has been dead for 4 years and I want to make him proud. I want the past 356 days to represent a period of growth in my life, as well as one during which I made dreams come true and realized that my priority should always be chasing more and more of my dreams.

So I'll put this out into the universe: I want to do great things and be successful. I want my name to be known and associated with something positive that is loved by many. I never want to worry about money ever again. I want to surround myself with good people and make my own dreams come true.

I will.

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