#i get no rest. i get no peace. every morning i wake up and 5 more demons are- oh my god | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tatorthots · 1 year

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— get you

featured: college!Eren x afab!reader x college!Levi, Mikasa Ackerman, Sasha Braus, Louise (canon Yeagerist)

cw: modern!au, slight fluff if you really squint, suggestive content, minors dni, toxic dynamics, possessiveness, cursing

synopsis: the life of a college student is already hard enough as it is with classes, homework, and lectures so why not add a complicated love triangle as well?

a/n: this is a repost !! I’ve written this before but decided to go back and re-edit it :) to everyone who’s read this before I hope you all enjoy this improved version!

Eren fucking Yeager.

The college campus’ fuckboy and the literal bane of your existence.

Eren has been the thorn in your side since you were both assigned dorm mates at the beginning of your junior year of college. Sure, you’ve heard of the infamous name he set out for himself as the ruthless ‘Attack Titan’ in your school's football team, and you were fully aware of his cold and narcissistic personality but hey, who were you to judge a book by its reviews, right? So you made the mistake of ever being kind to him when you first introduced yourself only to be met by desolate green eyes and a scoff. Not to mention he had the audacity to give you ‘house rules’ which basically summarized to cleaning the dorm and staying out of his way. No, Eren almost never spared you small talk or even pretended to tolerate your mere existence. Why? Who fucking knows. Honestly, you firmly believed the brunette was born with a vendetta against you — every day striving and scheming to better his tactics in making your life miserable like some ripoff supervillain. But worst of all is the fact he seemed to make a habit of following you around campus like some lost puppy. You’d think someone who supposedly hates you would do anything to keep themselves away, right? Wrong. He thrived off bickering, insulting, and annoying you at any chance he got. Weirdly enough, no matter how many times you prayed someone would approach you to give you reason to ditch him, everyone always seemed to particularly steer clear from you when he was with you. Almost as if they were too afraid to even look your way, let alone talk to you. But I guess that could all be chalked up to Erens possessive behavior; his sinister stare and malicious intent were ever present anytime anyone dared get close to you. Not that you would know though, no, you were far too busy rolling your eyes and thinking of witty comebacks or insults. Unknowingly, making it easier to keep you all to himself.

Silly girl.

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The echo of a blunt object clamoring to the floor abruptly stirred you from your peaceful slumber as the sound of it rolling on the hardwood floor rattled through the cramped dorm. Sitting up from your resting position you outwardly groaned as you rubbed the sleep off your eyes, “What the hell?” you sighed. Snatching your phone from its charging port you checked the time, squinting your eyes at the sudden brightness, “5:06 a.m?” Huffing in annoyance your jaw clenched as you glared at the door, already starting bright and early this morning huh you asshole, throwing your legs off the bed you groggily made your way out your bedroom door. Fuming at the fact you were forced to wake up so early after pulling an all-nighter studying last night; which, by the way, was already hard to do with Eren and his friends cluttering around the living room all night.

“What do you think you’re doi—“ your voice came to a complete halt when your eyes landed on an opened package and your recently delivered figurine displaced out of its box and lying on the floor. And to add insult to injury there stood Erens number one psycho of a fan, Louise. Giggling to herself as she kicked what would’ve been your most prized possession away from her. “What.. what are you doing…?” Your voice was barely above a whisper as your eyes remained focused on your figurine. The same figurine you excitedly pre-ordered a year ago. You couldn’t even afford to eat for a month afterward because of how much you spent on it and now there it was being kicked around by some desperate pest? So balling your hands into fists you marched over and shoved Louise aside to see the damage she had caused. But your anger only ignited when you saw your favorite character's weapon broken in half and their stand shattered to pieces. “What the fuck is wrong with you?!” You seethed as you bent down to sorrowfully try to connect the shattered pieces together. You were tired. So tired of this. Carefully tightening your hold on the broken pieces; you hated how you felt like you could cry from frustration. “Oops~” was all Louise bothered herself to say in response to her crime. Quietly, almost too calmly, you spoke, “… What did you just say?” “I said ‘oops’,” she cheekily replied, “besides, it’s not my fault you leave around boxes for anyone to touch.” Resting her hand on her hip she smirked down at you, “If you really cared so much about your little dolls then you shouldn’t have been so irresponsible~ heh, hope you learned your lesson.”

Standing up from your crouched position, you side-eyed Louise with a piercing, almost eerily, hyper-focused glare. This is it, you thought before clenching your fists and raising your arm, intent on actually beating her until your knuckles ached. But before you could swing, you felt a cautious grip on your wrist and a firm hold on your hip. Everything moved so fast, you didn’t even get to acknowledge the fingertips that slid up to the hem of your latex shorts before you found yourself spun and placed behind Eren. Staring up at him you blinked a few times. “Don’t get so heated.” He spat, with a disinterest in his tone almost mocking your apprehensive reaction, “She’s my guest.” He cocked his head at you with a sarcastic smile, and god did your eye twitch. It made your stomach churn and skin crawl knowing what he meant by that, and it… hurt. Shaking your thoughts, you swat his hands off of you, and scowled at the man towering over you, daring to defend the rat responsible for all of this. Dryly you scoffed, “She’s just another fuck-buddy you bring in here ren.” Crossing your arms together you continued your jeering, “You make a mess wherever you go and you even have the audacity to drag in trash? Tch. Please.” But, oh how naive you are to not notice. The glint of amusement reflecting off Erens emerald eyes just from the venom in your tone; it makes his dick twitch. He shifts a little uncomfortably trying to ease himself before exasperatedly sighing. “Well dove,” he begins as he starts to circle around you, “maybe if you weren’t such a self-righteous prude I wouldn’t have to bring girls in here…” stopping right in front of you he leaned down to reach eye-level, his taunting gaze only inches away from you as he lowly growled out, “I could just fuck you instead.”

Truth be told, Eren knew he was full of it — straight up lying through his teeth every time he told you he didn’t want you. In reality, the man was absolutely obsessed with you and anyone with eyes could see it, everyone except you. But unfortunately, Eren isn’t the type to admit his feelings so freely, let alone submit to his emotions. No, he was too prideful for that. Don’t be too harsh on him though, I mean, the idiot hasn’t even figured out himself what it is he feels for you. It could be part of the reason why he’s so particularly hostile with you, and why he’s equally possessive. Not to mention that Eren has been the object of many’s affection since he could remember; as in he’s never not had what he did or didn’t want. He learned early on that personality and sincerity isn’t anything more than currency in this world, and he abides by that principle. So to have someone like you, who’s breathtakingly mesmerizing, compassionate, intelligent, interesting, funny, and well, you, is completely left field for this playboy. You’re everything he thought wasn’t possible. You contradict his entire worldview of people. How could he not resent you — or fall for you all the same? He hates it.

However, as of now, all you know is that you’re fed up with this situation. Pushing past them to grab your keys and hoodie, you turned around and stormed through the front door. Did you know where you were going? Not a clue. But you sure as hell aren’t going to be anywhere near here. Anywhere near him. Walking out the door you heard Louise’s cackling laugh practically grating your ears and it only made your blood simmer further as you slammed the door behind you.

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“I’ve told you to speak to the Dean and ask for another dorm mate,” sighing as she stirred her coffee with a spoon, her dark eyes flickered up at you, “I’m sure if you explain your situation to him he’ll be more likely to accept your proposal.” Anxiously combing your hair back, you groaned at your best friend's advice, “Mikasa don’t you think I’ve already tried that?” Dramatically throwing your arms on the diner's table, you buried your face in your arms, “The Dean only has a strict appointment-based schedule,” with a pout you lift your head up slightly, “and the waiting list spans for the next four months!” Tucking your head back to sulk, Mikasa hummed in acknowledgment, but that’s when your other friend spoke up. “Then why don’t you try talking to his assistant?” Snapping your head up, you stare questioningly at Sasha as she shoved another beignet in her mouth, “Yeah but —mmph — what’s his name again?” “Levi.” Mikasa chimed in, “Levi Ackerman.” Levi Ackerman..?, you thought, Why does that name sound so familiar? But you didn’t get long to think about it before Sasha excitedly shouted out, “Yes—! Levi!” Putting her fork down she rubbed her chin in contemplation, “Huh, I heard he’s kind of a total jerk though, and everyone who’s ever met up with him spirals into some sort of existential crisis…” Mikasa kicked Sasha from under the table as she nodded in your direction, “O-oh! But um.. I mean how bad could he be, right?” Trying to nervously wave off what she said, Sasha patted you on the head, “You’ll be fine, y/n!”

I’ll be fine? Groaning again, you leaned your cheek on your hand as you looked at the people chatting or studying at their tables. “Well, I guess I don’t have much of a choice..” which to an extent is true. You either continue to put up with Eren until you eventually get an appointment with the Dean, or you talk to Levi Ackerman and hope you don’t spiral. That name though…, you pondered, Why do I know it? Smearing around the egg yolk on your avocado toast you glanced up at your friends. “Hey, why does that Levi name sound so familiar? Do we know him or something?” “Yes and no.” Sasha answered, “You’ve heard his name before because he’s that super mysterious senior everyone’s afraid of.” “He’s been the leader of the Honors Society since he was a sophomore, and he’s top-ranking academically in the country.” Mikasa added. Thinking to yourself you finally remembered, “Oh! That’s right!” You triumphantly chirped until it dawned on you what you remembered. Noticing the dread in your eyes Sasha laughed, “Mhm, you definitely look like you remember now~” “He’s that academic thug…” sinking into your chair you genuinely began to wonder who you crossed in your past life to deserve this, I probably helped commit genocide or something…, “Yeah, he’s gotten into a few fights but it’s always settled within reason.” “Pft, c’mon Mikasa, the schools probably too scared to punish its most valuable student.” Sasha snorted. “Hm. You might have a point, but it’s usually ruffians who feel they have something to prove that challenge him,” Mikasa pointed out, “He also hangs around his small clique. I think, our seniors like Petra, Eld, Gunther, Olou, and Hange.” “See y/n! How bad could he be if he hangs out with them?” Sighing, you smiled at your two closest friends and their attempt at making you feel better. “Yeah, you guys are right,” finishing your latte, you beamed down at them, “I’m gonna kick today's ass!”

After the three of you waved your goodbyes, you set off to go find the very man you only hear of through quiet whispers. Honestly, with all the mystery shrouding him you really started to believe he was some sort of urban legend the school came up with. Kind of like ‘if you don’t do your homework, Levi Ackerman will show up in your closet’ type of thing, you know? With an exasperated sigh, you look down at your clothes. Great. I’m about to meet the guy who’s also known for his ocd in a jujutsu keisen hoodie, spandex shorts, and crocs.. Sheepishly rubbing the back of your neck, you stared up at the birds flying above you, I wish I could live freely like them… Longingly looking up, you snap out of your thoughts as you approached the administrative office. Well, I promised Sasha and Mikasa I’d do this so.. here I go. Stepping into the front office you began your unexpected hour-and-a-half-long journey being sent practically all across campus in search of this Levi guy. You went from office to office, met up with more people than you’ve probably spoken to in the last two weeks, and wasted time waiting around for people who ended up either not knowing where he is or sending you back across campus. Until finally you made it to the science research facility building where you tiredly dragged yourself toward the receptionist’s desk. “Please..” you heaved, “Please tell me… *gasp of air* tell me Levi Ackerman is in this building!” Your eyes pleaded at the poor, spooked old lady as she stared at you. “Oh honey, please have a seat!” She scurried next to you and guided you to sit down, “He’s tucked away in the computer lab right now, let me go notify him!” Grabbing her arm, you peered into her eyes, “He’s here?” “Y-yes!” Nervously laughing, she placed her hand on top of yours, “You know what? How about you come with me. He’ll most likely decline your visit if I notify him.” And with that, you made your final trudge with the old lady you managed to scare into personally leading you to Levi.

“Alrighty sweetheart, this is him.” Pointing toward a large door, the receptionist politely smiled at you before hurrying back to her desk and leaving you all alone. Glancing at the wooden door, you suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of anxiety. Okay… I um.. I made it this far, right? You tried to reassure yourself but the longer you stared at the door, the more your imagination ran rampant. What if he’s big and terrifying looking? You imagined a tall, ogre-looking man, Or what if he’s a total creep? Then some balding guy who resembled a mole. If ren were here I wouldn’t feel so intimid—huh? Ren? Shuddering at your thoughts, you took a deep inhale, Alright, clearly the longer I stand here the more I’m beginning to lose it, so with a little pep-talk you figured you might as well rip the bandaid. Twisting the handle, you carefully pushed open the door and peeked inside. The entire room was almost the size of an entire lecture hall but filled with neat rows of computers. Wow… you thought as you opened the door further to step inside. Looking around the room in amazement, you immediately stopped in your tracks when you noticed a figure sitting at the front of the room reading a textbook with notebooks and papers stacked on the table. That must be him. Clearing your throat you decided to call out to him, “Excuse me, I’m looking for Levi Ackerman,” slowly walking up to him you tried to fill in the silence, “I’m assuming that’s you, right?” Closing in on the table he sat at, you managed to make out a head of black hair and.. and him drinking tea? Quirking a brow at the full tea set he had displayed, you spoke up again, “My names y/n. I wanted to talk to you about an issue I have and I was told you cou—“ “Get lost.” H-huh..? Did I mishear him? “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you but I—“ “If you don’t intend to offend me then go bother somebody else. I’m busy.” His voice was deep and monotone, clearly uninterested in what you had to say by the way he didn’t even bother to acknowledge your presence.

Biting the inside of your cheek, you knitted your brows in irritation. Of course. Gritting your teeth, you strode right up to him and slammed your hand down on the desk, “You’re a tough guy to find, you know that?” You chuckled dryly, “Did you also know I spent the last two hours running around campus trying to find you? So no, I’m not leaving until you at least listen to what I have to say.” Setting his tea down, the raven-haired man finally turned to look at you, “Is that so?” He questioned, though it was clear the question was more rhetorical than genuine. With a long sigh, he swiveled his chair to completely face you; and then that’s when you flinched in surprise as you scanned him. He’s hot… you thought, Oh god, he’s hot..!? The man in question had inky black hair styled in an undercut, a complimentary choice when paired with his delicate yet sharp features. This definitely wasn’t what you expected. Even the dark circles under his eyes look good… A light blush began to creep up on your cheeks as you realized the commotion you just made in front of someone like him. All the while you stared in a flustered daze, Levi was languidly trailing his eyes across your body. Resting his head on his hand, he couldn’t deny he liked the sudden surprise presented to him. Huh.. he mused. “Well? What’s so damn important?” Straightening up at the sound of his voice, you smoothed out the wrinkles on your hoodie, “Oh! Yes, of course.. I’d like to propose a change of dorm mates.” Staring at him, the intensity in his eyes only worked to captivate you to him, “My… my roommate isn’t working out, and no matter what I try to do to civilize the situation it just doesn’t work out..” you ended, almost disappointingly. Levi hummed as he listened before standing up from his chair. “Is that what’s got you so worked up?” But something about his tone made you think he might’ve been referring to something else. “Why not go to the Dean?” He inquired as he slowly approached you, and you subconsciously took a few steps back until the back of your thighs hit a table behind you and you almost fell sitting on it. “The Dean has appointments booked all through the semester and since the matter is urgent I figured I’d reach out to his personal assistant.” The fact you managed to jumble that out without stuttering was a blessing in itself. “I see.” Narrowing his eyes on you he continued, “Then I guess I have no choice but to agree if it’s so urgent.” Blinking a few times you took a moment to process his words, Is he agreeing to help me? “Meet me later this evening to discuss the details,” his expression remained unchanged but you caught glimpse of the glimmer in his silver eyes as he stared at you, “I assume 7 works for you?” “7..?” You muttered, “Ah, yes, of course!” “Great. I’ll escort you then. Now if you’ll excuse me,” he closed in on your body and reached an arm past your waist, his lips inches away from your ear as he leaned in, “I have other matters to attend to.” Your body stiffened and your breath hitched until he pulled back with a notebook in his hand. He was.. just reaching for his notebook..? Nodding your head in agreement you politely excused yourself and raced out of the room with a bright blush searing your skin as he watched slightly amused at your disappearing figure.

After exiting the computer lab, you stood there for a few seconds in a flustered haze. What the hell just happened? Brushing your fingertips across your cheek you tried to ease away the warmth on them. Heh, I’ve gotta tell Sasha and Mikasa about this! You giddily thought as you whipped out your phone and started typing in the group chat. And after a morning of lectures and labs without your backpack, you finally made it back to your dorm. Heaving a sigh, you slung yourself on the couch and peeked your eye to where your broken figurine last lay. It’s gone… You figured Eren must’ve thrown it away along with the rest of the trash before leaving for his afternoon classes. Grabbing a pillow you covered your face and screamed into the fabric before sitting up and punching it a few times in frustration. “Fuck—!” You loudly groaned out. Why does he have to be that way? Scrunching your face, you massaged the bridge of your nose to calm down, He’s a dick to everyone, sure, but why does he target me so much? Even after… Throwing the pillow to the other side of the couch you hastily stood up and checked the time. Whatever, you bitterly thought, it’ll all be over soon enough. So you brushed off the thought and jumped in the shower to get ready for tonight’s occasion.

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Rushing around your room, you turned your phone on to see 6:43 p.m. glaring at you. No, no, nononono—! Hissing in annoyance at your time management, you hurriedly slipped on a long, slit, silk skirt over your sheer tights. “Okay, alright, almooost done!” Grunting as you put on a pair of platform boots, you stood up and admired yourself in the mirror. “Heh,” you chuckled, “Elegant and fashionable with a touch of promiscuous.” After pulling a quick jojo pose in the mirror, you adjusted your open back top and strut through your bedroom door with an excited smile. But your smile immediately turned into a grimace when you caught sight of Eren and Louise lounging on the couch. Fucking bitch.. you internally sneered as you scrunched your nose in distaste. “Self-respect… and that goes for the both of them.” You mumbled under your breath. Forget it. Rummaging around the kitchen, you tried looking for your hand purse until an agitated voice called out to you.

“Shocked you’re not tryna run around empty-handed again since you had no problem with it this morning,” you could already see his irked frown, “and yeah I heard you’ve been taking a tour through campus by the way.” Roiling your eyes, you heard him shift as you clipped on your earrings, “I looked for you in the library to bring you your bag since apparently, you need everything done for y—“ widening his eyes, Erens jaw slacked as he eyed you. “…. fuck” he lowly muttered. He knew you were fine, he gets mesmerized by your beauty every day, but damn. Your leg peeking out of the silk fabric slit, and the way it’s tight fit complimented the curve of your ass was just too much for him. His mildew gaze trailed up to your open back top and he almost groaned at the slightest tease of side-boob. And just as he almost folded, he snapped out of it when he realized you were going out dressed like that. “Wait, where the fuck are you going?”

But Eren knew that wasn’t what he was really asking. No, what you wore never bothered him, in fact, he loved when you got all dolled up; let others look because he can fight — and he has, for you. What Eren was really asking was ‘Where the fuck are you going without me?’ ‘Who are you meeting?’ ‘Do you like them?’ ‘Would you forget me?’ Those were the real questions bouncing around in his head.

“Doesn’t matter.” Was all you replied, but the grip those two words had on him were like a vice. Leaning down to adjust your ankle bracelet, his eyes darted to the way your back subtly arched. He could already feel the tent growing in his pants, but he couldn’t be bothered to do something to hide it when all he could think about was how pretty you’d look stuffed full of him. He was desperate to touch you, feel you, claim you — just as desperate as he was to be owned by you, in every way, any way you’d allow him to be yours. Maybe you were just too dense for your own good. He tried his damndest to keep his composure as best as he could but his voice gave it away, “It’s a fucking date.” He snarled, low and threateningly. You glanced over at him, confused and infuriated at his audacity to interrogate you about where you were going or who you were meeting. “Doesn’t. Matter.” Both of you locked eyes as an intensity conflicted within his irises and a rage burned within yours. Scoffing, you turned on your heels, grabbed your purse, and walked toward the front door. Eren wanted to stand up and stop you, he wanted to do something anything but the pulsing ache in his pants kept him rooted to the couch. “Tell me who it is.” He demanded, and you finally reached your breaking point. Clenching your fists you turned your head and glared at Eren, “Hah. You’re really something, huh?” You condescendingly seethed, “You always bring in random girls in here almost every night and you have the fucking audacity to question me?” Reaching for the handle, you pushed open the door, “Don’t forget your place, Eren.” And his eyes widened at the use of his name, “And I won’t forget mine.” Slamming the door behind you, he felt his heart ache at the way your voice wavered when you said those last words. He wanted to argue, tell you that you’re wrong, that he’d do anything for you but he couldn’t. All he could do was stare at the door and lose himself in his thoughts.

Through the halls, you bitterly made your way outside the dormitory. Who the hell does he think he is? Roughly opening doors, you fumed, Acting like he owns me. Hah! If I didn’t know better I’d even think he cares about me. Bursting open the front doors of the dorm entrance you marched outside and hastily walked out of the dormitory district, What does he want from me? Seriously, I don’t understand him at all! You clutched your purse as you trembled with anger, He’s so confusing, ugh! He does things for me that make me feel special but then he… but then he acts like that! Like.. like Eren and I d— bumping into somebody, you stumbled back. Huh? Looking up you were surprised to see,

“Levi?”

“The hells wrong with you?” Steadying you with a hand around your arm, you didn’t realize he had grabbed you to keep you from falling, “Do you normally walk around like you’re ready to slice someone’s head off?” He asked, and you looked away in embarrassment, “.. sorry.” “Clearly whoever you’re so damn angry with should be the one apologizing,” letting go of your arm he sardonically added, “or it’s their funeral.” Covering your mouth, you laughed at his words, and his attention focused on the sound. Pretty.. he thought. Easing from your laughter, you looked up at him with a cheery smile, “Thank you for going out of your way to wait for me, I’m sorry I’m a little late.” “Yeah.. don’t-um..,” clearing his throat, Levi averted his gaze from yours, “Don’t worry about it.” Blinking at him, you stood admiring the way the luminescent streetlights illuminated his clear skin, “We should get going.” Interrupting your daze, you tilted your head in curiosity, Hm? Oh, that’s right, “Where are we going?” Checking his watch, his sharp eyes flickered up at you, “There’s a cafe I frequent often,” walking next to you, he placed his hand on the small of your back to guide you next to him and away from the street, “It’s a little hidden but they have a good atmosphere.” His gaze drifted to you and carefully took in the sight of you, “I hope it’s to your taste.” Glancing at him your eyes sparked with excitement, “A hidden cafe? I love checking out new coffee shops to study in! I’m looking forward to potentially adding another shop to my list!” Levi watched as you buzzed with enthusiasm. He was a little apprehensive about inviting you out to a small cafe, not knowing if it’d be something you’d enjoy, so to see you react so excitedly he sighed in relief. Seems this little venture might actually be worth its while. Unbeknownst to you, Levi did do a little background check on you through his student access — perk of being the Deans assistant — and he was pleasantly surprised to see all the achievements and participation activities you had under your belt. Most students don’t bother to do more than get through classes and do solely what’s asked of them as students. So his interest most definitely peaked when he quickly scanned through your transcript. Charming, fierce, intelligent, and beautiful. Lucky me.. he mused.

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#jay writes ! ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡̷̷̷ ⋆⁺₊⋆#aot x reader #snk x reader #eren x reader #eren jaeger x reader #eren yaeger x reader #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #aot angst #aot fluff #aot smut #aot imagines #attack on Titan x reader

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pb524830 · 2 months

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anyone else

part: 5 pairing: paige bueckers x oc word count: 4.2k c/w: language, injury a/n: guys, thank you so so so much for following along with this story. it means the absolute world to me. that being said, we're a few parts away from the end of this fic. please keep sending in asks so that i can write after this!! i seriously need your help - i know i don't respond to asks but trust me i see them all!

DECEMBER 2021

When I wake up in Paige’s arms again, I don’t scramble to leave like I did before. It’s like all my inhibitions are lowered. My left leg is precariously sprawled out to protect my knee, my right ledged in between hers. Her arms are locked tightly around my waist, her hair splayed across her shoulders. I smile to myself. Paige looks angelic, her blonde hair a halo around her peaceful, sleeping face. I move ever so slightly, just to get a better view, and her eyes flutter open, registering me slowly.

“Hi,” I whisper.

“Hey, you,” she whispers back, her voice hoarse. This time, when she brushes my hair out of my face, I don’t try to stop her.

“How’s the knee?” She wonders.

I wince. “Been better,” I admit.

She grimaces. “That was a crazy save, though,” she reassures me. Her voice is so endearingly scratchy that I can hardly stand it.

“It was, wasn’t it?” I muse. She laughs, her fingers still smoothing my hair down. Then they move to my face. She traces my lips with the tip of her finger, then trails down to go over my jaw. Her eyes train on my lips, and I can hardly chastise her for it, because I watch the way her tongue darts out to lick her own.

Stop it.

I sigh, sitting up to turn away from her. “Avantika,” she says exasperatedly. “Stop doing that.”

I feel her sit up, too, her presence closer to me. “You didn’t have to stay,” I mumble.

Paige sighs, her hands landing on my arms to run up and down them. I shiver at her touch, but lean into it anyway. She’s so warm, so real, so familiar. “When have I ever been able to say no to you?” She asks quietly.

It’s true. Even a year ago, when we’d end up like this, I’d always initiated it.

Can I stay?

Do you want me to stay?

It didn’t matter if she had practice early the next morning or lift, or if I’d crawl out of bed much earlier than her to leave her sleeping form to go about my own day. I just loved being with her. I missed the small things; her calloused fingers against my skin, her breath whistling through her lips. We didn’t do anything but sleep, and I had always wondered how this girl who supposedly got with every available girl on campus (and some unavailable ones) hadn’t yet tried to weasel her way into my pants.

I focus on the feeling of her hands, ignoring the goosebumps that appear on my legs. I feel the strap of my tank top slide off my shoulder, and Paige’s breath hits my bare skin. I hold my own breath, waiting to see what she’ll do. Part of me wants her to just touch me, to drop this nonsensical facade and take me the way she wants to, the way that part of me wants her to.

But then…

There’s the part of me that cried so hard over her that the pain in between my eyebrows was still there the next morning.

Her lips press to my shoulder. Over and over, she peppers slow kisses all over my bare skin. I shiver, gasping slightly. She doesn’t take it any further, just rests her chin where her mouth was. “Can I tell you something?” She asks softly. I feel the vibrations from her voice against my body and I hum in response. Her hand comes around my body to take mine, lacing our fingers together.

“I missed you. Bad.”

“Paige, please,” I say, because I can’t stand the thought of her missing me just as much as I missed her.

“How do you not see that?” She demands softly.

“Stop it,” I tell her, but she’s rattling the bars of the cage around my heart.

“I thought it would stop. I thought I could stop wanting you, I really did,” she murmurs, squeezing my hand. “I can’t. I can’t. I swear I’m trying…” She sounds exhausted. The silence is heavy, and I run my thumb over her fingers. “We can’t,” I say, but I don’t believe myself.

“I can’t not want you,” she admits. Her voice is so small, smaller than I’ve ever heard it.

I turn my head to look at her, just an inch, and suddenly her lips are on mine.

I gasp at the electricity that runs through me when Paige kisses me deeply, a hand coming up to caress my jaw. I kiss back immediately, because pulling away from her when she’s kissing me like this feels almost criminal. I let her move her lips against mine, let her lay back against the pillows and bring me with her, pulling my body to hers without disconnecting our mouths. She slips her tongue into my mouth lazily and I sigh against her lips, cupping her face to press her closer. She makes a noise into the kiss that I can’t quite decipher, a hand brushing at my hip, then edging under my shirt.

“Tell me to stop,” she whispers against my mouth. I kiss her harder, not ready to be plunged back into reality, because she feels the same and tastes the same and it hurts. “Ava, tell me to stop,” she begs. I kiss her once more, softly, slowly, then pull away, resting my forehead against hers. “You should go,” I whisper after a few minutes of us just breathing into each other. She closes her eyes, groaning in frustration.

“You keep saying we can’t. You keep pushing me away and you won’t fucking tell me why. Why? Why can’t we do this? Because clearly I want to and you want to-”

“I don’t.” I interrupt. “Want to. I don’t want to.”

Paige breathes out through her nostrils. “Bullshit,” she says, her tone flat.

I frown at her. “Excuse me?” I demand.

“You’re saying you don’t want me, but the way you just kissed me says otherwise.”

“Is it so hard for you to believe someone doesn’t want you?”

“No. It’s hard for me to believe that you don’t want me.”

“Shut up, Paige.”

Her voice rises: “Does all of this mean nothing to you? I mean, everything our freshman year? Last night? How do you not-”

“Did you help me last night just so you could…” I trail off, my chest paining. I stare at her, anger searing in my stomach. When I speak, I feel hot tears pricking at my eyes. “Did you help me out last night so you could fuck me?” I ask quietly, but there’s anger in every syllable.

Her eyes widen. “What? Ava-”

“Don’t call me that.”

“I helped you because I fucking care about you!” She yells suddenly, standing up off the bed. “What else do I need to do to prove to you that I fucking care about you?”

“That’s bullshit!” I yell back, standing up to face her, wincing on my bad leg. “You don’t give a fuck about me! You never have!”

“How can you say that?” Paige demands angrily, her tone quieter but no less menacing. She jabs a finger at me. “How the fuck can you sit there and tell me how I feel when I didn’t sleep for days when you stopped talking to me? I couldn’t eat, I was fucking up in practice, and all I could think about was you.”

Her words shock me into silence. I gape at her.

“And you have the audacity,” she seethes, stepping closer to me, lording her height over me. “To say that I don’t care about you. There you fucking go.” Her chest heaves, and she stares down at me, daring me to say something.

“Get out,” I spit out. It’s more because I can’t stand this side of her than anything. Paige combs her hands through her hair angrily.

“Why won’t you just talk to me?” She demands frustratedly.

“I said get out, Paige,” I hiss. She drops her hands in exasperation.

“Nah, you know what? I’m done with this shit. Fuck you, Avantika.”

She storms out of my room, slamming the door behind her.

I finally let out the sob I’ve been holding in, collapsing back onto my bed. I’m pissed at myself for letting myself fall back in with her just because it’s so easy, angry with her for weaseling her way back into my life somehow, and more than anything… confused. So confused. She cares about me? She gave two shits that I wasn’t talking to her? That can’t be true.

Then she has to be lying.

But why would she lie to me? Just to get in my pants? Lord knows there’s a hundred other girls on this campus Paige could sleep with.

I bring my good knee to my chest, letting my tears drip onto the fabric of my pajama pants. Just the thought of her with someone else brings a pang to my chest. I can’t stop myself from thinking about her, can’t push away the image of her gorgeous blue eyes, or her infectious smile, the sound of her intoxicating laugh. I can’t push away the way she smells, her hair against my cheek, the feel of her hands on my skin or her lips against mine. I just can’t get rid of her. Fuck. It’s happening again. I’m letting her in again. I like her.

A lot.

And it fucking sucks.

DECEMBER 2021

Azzi comes in later that day. “Hey, honey, how’re you doing?” She asks, perching at the edge of my bed and handing me a large gift bag. I set it aside. “Fine,” I mumble, picking at my fingernails. She raises an eyebrow. “Don’t lie,” she chides. I sigh, leaning my head back against the wall. “I feel like shit. And it hurts like a motherfucker,” I state blandly. She pushes the bag towards me. “This might help.”

Reluctantly, I open the bag, looking through it. I feel a smile take over my face immediately. “Az, this is so sweet, what the hell!” I rummage around, taking out all my favorites; Takis, Hershey’s Cookies ‘n’ Cream, Sour Patch Kids, a bottle of Sprite. “I figure since the season’s over and you’re bedridden anyway, you deserve a little cheat day,” she explains. I lean forward and throw my hands around her neck. “You’re the best,” I gush. She giggles. “Wait, there’s a card, too.”

I fish the card out of the bag and smile at the sight of Jonathan the Husky on the cover. I open the card, seeing that the rest of the basketball girls have signed it for me. Evina has signed it “Mama E” which makes me chuckle. Someone’s signature is noticeably missing from the page. I guess Azzi sees me searching for it even though I don’t mean to. “Paige totally would have signed it,” she tells me hurriedly. “We just couldn’t find her last night.” I nod. “No, I love it. Thank you, Az,” I say, hugging her tightly again.

Azzi looks at me curiously. “Is there something going on between you two?” She asks. My heart thuds. Am I that obvious? “What makes you say that?” I laugh nervously. “Nothing, just… she was really concerned yesterday when you got hurt, and then she disappeared last night and I thought she might be with you…” Azzi trails off, narrowing her eyes. I shift uneasily. “She’s just being a good… friend,” I amend, pausing before I find a descriptor. I have no idea what Paige is to me. She’s certainly not nothing. She’s hardly just a friend. Especially after this morning. “I didn’t know you two were friends,” Azzi says slowly, crossing her arms over her chest. I sigh. “Well, we’re trying. For you.” Azzi nods, but I can tell there’s a large part of her that doesn’t believe a word I’m saying. “I appreciate that,” she finally relents, appearing to drop the subject. I breathe out a sigh of relief, tearing into the Sour Patch Kids.

DECEMBER 5, 2021

Paige hasn’t looked at me all day. Which is maybe for the better. I had hobbled to shootaround before the Notre Dame game and sat in the stands because Azzi said she wanted me there, even though she wasn’t playing. I know it’s a big game for the team; the Notre Dame rivalry is notorious, and I know Sue Bird is going to be there. Of course I want to come support the girls. Everyone had come up to say hi or talk to me or ask about my knee, but Paige had stayed stubbornly far away from me. Part of me wants to scream at her, but the other part knows that’s not fair. I’m the one who told her to get out. Yelled it at her, more like.

Now, the game is starting, and they’re jogging out onto the court, and Paige won’t even throw a glance in my direction. Her face is stoic, and I’ve hardly ever seen it like that before. I keep telling myself that this is for the better. That when she isn’t trying to talk to me and isn’t making me laugh and isn’t intoxicating me with that stupid scent of hers, we’re both much better off.

The game goes smoothly for the most part from my vantage point behind the bench.

Then it happens. Almost in slow motion.

Paige is bringing the ball back up the court, and her leg extends, buckling. She seems to be fine the couple seconds right after, and I nearly let out a sigh of relief. Then she starts limping, her left leg unable to hold her up.

She passes the ball to Caroline.

She crumples to the floor.

There’s a ringing in my ears and I’m out of my seat before I know it. The entire stadium is gasping. The best athlete at UConn has just gone down, and she isn’t getting up. My heart contracts in my chest. This isn’t happening. This can’t be happening.

As much as I claim to hate her, as much as I fundamentally can’t stand her, I know Paige. Basketball is everything to her. It’s who she is. I can hardly stand the sight of her limp body sprawled on the ground, her back heaving with sobs. She’s the strongest person I know. She always has been. Seeing her like this… it pains me. I bring a shaking hand to my mouth, willing her to get up. Get up, Paige. Come on.

Finally, they help her to her feet. The stadium erupts in cheers, but she’s crying. Her face is wet with tears, her eyes red, and finally, finally, she looks to me. Her eyes are pleading. I watch them take her back to the locker rooms, unsure of what I should do.

Then her eyes flash through my mind again. Asking. Begging. Pleading.

I limp out of the stands and towards the locker room. Security tries to stop me but CD tells them sternly to let me through. I doubt they could have stopped me, anyway, because there’s only one thing on my mind right now: getting to Paige. I try to sprint (and I curse my leg for the sole reason that I can't get to her fast enough) through the underground of Gampel, not completely sure where I’m going, but knowing what I have to do.

Finally, I find the trainer’s room, and I stumble to a halt. Paige is alone, sitting at the edge of a clinical bed in the center of the room. She stares angrily at her knee. “Paige,” I breathe, tears pricking at my eyes. Her eyes shoot to mine. She’s silent. “Ava,” she whispers back, her voice cracking. Tears fall down her face in rapid succession, her face twisting with grief, chest shaking with sobs. I rush to her immediately, inserting myself in between her legs, gathering her head to my shoulder. Her arms wrap around my waist, clutching me tightly.

I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t. All I know is that Paige, my Paige, this strong, resilient, unbreakable person, is breaking in my arms. I press a kiss into her hair and she sobs harder, holding me tighter. “Do you know what’s wrong?” I ask, pulling back slightly. She keeps her face pressed into my chest. My shoulder is wet with her tears, but I don’t care. Paige shakes her head. “They haven’t looked at it.” I take a look behind me, then move away from her to go shut the door. “Don’t leave,” she begs, catching my hand. I cup her face, stroking it soothingly. “I’m not going anywhere,” I promise. She nods shakily. I close the door, then make my way back to her.

And I just hold her.

DECEMBER 5, 2021

- Paige’s POV -

Why is she here?

Ava’s at shootaround. She’s not here for me. She doesn’t even look at me. Once that thought registers, my pass to Ines is much stronger - a little too strong. Ines raises an eyebrow at me when she catches it. “You good?” She asks. “Fine,” I reply shortly. Aubrey jogs over to talk to her, leaning over the railing of the stands.

“Which of my teammates would you fuck?”

“Aubrey.”

I scoff loudly, rolling my eyes, throwing the ball to Ines. “Ouch!” She complains as it lands hard against her chest. Ava’s deep in conversation with Aubrey. I have half a mind to start towards the bleachers, red tinging my vision, when Azzi catches my arm. “P, are you good?” She asks. I shake her off. “Why does everyone keep asking me that, bro?” I mutter irritatedly. “Well, you look like you wanna kill someone,” she tells me, raising an eyebrow. She follows the line of my glare, and her other eyebrow shoots up. “And it looks like that person is Aubrey. Are you jealous?” She demands.

I splutter. “What? No!” Azzi crosses her arms. “I asked Ava about you this morning,” she says flatly. My ears immediately perk up. “Oh yeah? What did she say?” I pretend to be disinterested, kicking at the ground beneath me, dribbling the ball absentmindedly. “She told me she likes you back.”

I nearly get whiplash from how fast my head shoots up. “She does?” I ask. Azzi’s smirk is triumphant. “So you do like her!” She teases gleefully, jabbing a finger at me in accusation. I groan. “Not funny, Azzi,” I complain, pushing past her to the bench. “You should have told me,” she insists, hurrying after me. I feel bad that she’s almost running on her bad foot, but I’m more than a little pissed at her.

“You should talk to her, dude. Oh my gosh, how did I not know you liked her?” She mutters to herself. “How could you not like her?” I gripe, grabbing my water bottle and taking an angry swig. Ava’s smiling at Aubrey, laughing at something she’s saying. I resist the urge to throw my water bottle at Aubrey’s stupid bun. “And for your fucking information, Azzi,” I bite at my best friend. “We have talked about it. So leave it.”

“What did she say?” Azzi pushes. I roll my eyes. “She doesn’t want to be with me like that. She… I don’t know. Can we talk about this later?” It’s a stupid question. Azzi won’t drop it. I know that. “Maybe because you’re a whore,” she says thoughtfully. My eyes widen. “Azzi!” I exclaim, shocked and a little miffed. I chance another glance at Ava. She’s engrossed in her phone, her other hand tapping out a shadow piano melody on her knee. She does that, sometimes.

I tear my eyes away. “... ask her what’s wrong?” Azzi is blabbering about something. I blink. “Sorry, what?” I ask, confused. Azzi rolls her eyes. “Oh, you have it bad,” she tells me shaking her head. I make a face at her, jeering as she walks away. “No, that’s really fucking helpful, Az! Thank you!” I call after her.

I think for a moment I feel Ava’s eyes on me, but when I look back at her, her eyes are still trained on her phone screen. I huff, deciding to focus on the game at hand. I’m nervous. There’s no other way to put it. I need to be playing my best basketball right now, with Azzi out, with Sue Bird sitting behind our bench.

Tipoff approaches faster than I expect it to, and I push Ava out of my mind. The pressure feels like it’s getting to me.

It does, for a bit.

I turn the ball over on the second possession, make an idiotic attempted pass into the post on the fourth, and do a shitty job of cleaning up the boards all within the first two minutes or so. I hit a two somewhere in between, but something feels off. The game continues, and I start to feel better about it. I hit a couple three’s, get Caroline open in the lane for a middy. My chest puffs when I make a killer nearly full court pass near the middle of the game for Christyn’s buzzer beater. The team is hitting its shots at the line and everything is going so well I forget the worry I felt at the beginning of the game.

I lead a run to our largest lead right before the last quarter begins. I’m feeling good. I’m feeling great, actually. Sure, maybe it’s not my highest scoring game. But we really fucking feel like a team.

The fourth quarter feels… different. One of the Notre Dame girls collides with me near the basket, and I land on my stomach with an “oof!”. For a second, the wind is knocked out of me. But I shake it off and let my teammates help me to my feet. My neck aches as I get up, my vision a little blurry. I shoot my free throws, cursing myself when I miss the last one.

I still sprint back on defense, landing hard on my ass when I take a charge. A triumphant yell tears itself from my throat when the foul is called. “Fuck, yeah!” I scream from the floor, high-fiving my teammates and flexing.

Then it happens. Almost in slow motion.

I bring the ball back up the court, and suddenly, my left knee buckles out from under me. I try to play it off as a hesi, a little skip-step, because all I can really think is how fucking stupid I must have looked.

Then comes the pain.

It sears through my left leg, and I nearly gasp at the intensity of it. I try to keep going, try to dribble it down the court, but I can’t. I hand the ball off to Caroline and collapse to the ground.

Weak, weak, weak. I feel weak. But I can’t get up. I feel the weight of hundreds of thousands of eyes on me, but I can’t fucking get up. I’m sobbing at the pain, so all-consuming that I almost don’t feel it. I feel like I might pass out from it. I’m on my side, my face angled to the ground, and I feel my teammates gather around me, concerned.

It hurts, it hurts, it hurts so fucking bad.

Get up, Paige. Come on.

I grit my teeth.

I let Amari and Evina carry me to the bench.

I let the trainer look at my knee.

I’m not an idiot. I see the worried looks that pass between the training staff. I tip my head back, breathing deeply through my mouth, willing the pain away and the tears back. Then they say they need to take me back and examine it in the training room. No. No.

They help me towards the locker room exit, and that’s when my eyes catch Ava’s. Her hands are over her mouth, her beautiful, brown eyes wide with concern. I’d give anything to hug her right now, to breathe in that scent of vanilla and coconut and orchids and convince myself that everything will be alright.

I need you right now, I think desperately.

I sit alone in the training room, glaring angrily at my knee. The knot in my throat is suffocating.

When I hear Ava’s soft, lilting voice, when I see her frame in the doorway, I almost laugh in relief. What comes out instead is a choked sob, and the tears flow freely. But it’s her. For a second, I don’t care what just happened, don’t care that I could’ve torn something or sprained something. Because she’s here and she’s wrapping her arms around me and she’s pressing me to her chest, letting me cling to her while I cry. And she smells like her, sweet and comforting. She feels like her, soft and strong and lovely. For a second, I’m scared that she’ll try to leave.

But she stays.

She just holds me.

And it’s more than enough.

#paige bueckers #paige bueckers fic #fic #wcbb #paige bueckers x oc #uconn wbb #✂️ anon #ncaaw

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tojivu · 3 months

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Helloo!! I've came across ur fics a few times and it never fail to makes me smile, and I have an idea from scrolling on tiktok for a whole week, I'm not sure if ur reqs are still open... But may I request the orange peel theory with jjk men n boys? Your pick on who u want to write in that scenario! If ur req is close pls ignore this! Thank you and I hope you have an amazing day!

the things i do for you ! ⋆ jjk men

the orange peel theory ˖ gojo, geto, toji, nanami.

an. honestly i'm still kind of ??? on what exactly is the orange peel theory but i'm assuming it's just acts of service? im so sorry if its wrong LOL pls i don't keep up with tiktok......

an ii. ok i did end up getting the prompt wrong but i hope yall like this anyway..

cw. sfw. f!reader. not proofread. acts of service.

playing. lovesong by beabadoobee.

GOJO SATORU is a familiar face at the local coffee shop down the block — and no, it's not because he keeps raiding their cheesecake displays. he much prefers the ones across the street; he only comes by this particular one to pick up your favourite coffee.

"toru, could you get something for me at the coffee place?"

"yeah, i can," he hums. "what do you need, baby?"

it's actually only a 5 minute walk, and you never told satoru your order. it was too specific that you were sure he would forget; so you just told him to buy an iced latte and be quick with it. after all, you could never go wrong with such a basic drink.

"'s okay, baby," he presses a quick kiss to your cheek, confident he would not come back home with a boring latte. "i'll get you something even better."

"please don't. your taste in coffee is terrible — no, forget it, i can just go by myself later." you groan, wriggling around in the sheets of your bed to find that warm spot in the blankets; satoru was up since 6am, and you've only just opened your eyes.

"oh, no need for that," your boyfriend smirks: almost too creepily. "i have great taste! both in coffee and women—"

you smack his arm, using your hands to gesture a shoo-ing motion. you weren't conscious enough to tolerate satoru's gross flirtations. his eyebrows furrow and lips pout, quickly planting another kiss on your forehead before standing up. he scrambles through the desk drawer for his sunglasses — eventually finding them and leaving the house.

little did you know that your boyfriend has your order memorised — it was a small order, not that difficult to remember. satoru didn't think it was necessary to make you get up and grab it yourself; he had legs, and he liked the fresh air, too. plus, he knows he'll get to see you smile first thing when you wake up; perhaps you might give him one of those kisses on the forehead that he loves so much.

you thought he would have called you lazy for not getting up — he would be offended you think so little of him if you admitted that. satoru sees your sleepy face, hears your peaceful snores and he thinks he would rather die by impalement than wake you.

when satoru returns, you're still tucked into bed and fast asleep. he leaves the coffee on the nightstand before kneeling down and leaving the third kiss of the day, right on your lips — and it's then that he realises that you have him so in love that he's willing to spend $8.95 every morning for the rest of his life on overpriced coffee.

────────────────────────

GETO SUGURU holds the most romantic date nights, but there's only one thing you don't particularly enjoy — that being there's always so much walking involved.

yes, you think the opportunity to just take a breath and link pinkies with suguru is nice; it's just that your shoes tend to undo themselves no matter how many bunny ears you tie. your laces have been through war — the plastic aglets have been long lost and the loose string is practically just that. they're starting to pull apart from eachother that you consider just wearing heels for the next few dates until you find better ones.

"we just need to turn the corner—"

suguru's words are cut off by your sighs. you look down at your shoelaces and they are once again untied; the pout on your lips make his curve upward, after he lets out a sigh of his own.

"i really need to get you new shoes," suguru mutters. "they've definitely been through it."

"can you tie them for me?"

it's a simple request that gets suguru on one knee, dress pants stained by the concrete dust, as you patiently wait for him to finish tying the knots he's so skilled at.

"the ones you tie never come out."

"that's a lie," suguru says, his voice a little muffled with the distance between your heads. his rough fingers miss the loop and he opts to restart the knot. "i tied them before we left the house, and look at them now."

your face flushes at that. he sees through your lie like glass — you were always so easy to read.

"i just like the way you tie them, sugu. plus, they only untied because i redid them myself."

"yeah, i think it's because i don't tie them like a preschooler," suguru teases — he ties the knot tightly and stands up. "you should learn how to tie them the right way, baby."

you shake your head, and he raises an eyebrow at your reaction. his left pinky reaches for yours again, before you two start to walk once more.

"why do i need to learn if i have you?"

there's silence for a bit, nothing but cars honking and chattering from the people enjoying the nightlife just as you were — you almost retract your statement when suguru looks at you expectantly.

"is that so?" suguru chuckles at your response. "i guess you're right."

you giggle at his seemingly sarcastic reply — but you don't see the way he smiles, the way the tips of his ears burn, nor do you hear the loud thumping of his heart that tell he is being serious.

────────────────────────

TOJI FUSHIGURO doesn't know what small is.

well, everything about him is big — his body, his mind, his bank account, his heart.

it took you awhile to figure that last one out, though. toji always does the big things. the extravagant, flaunting, costly things. it's only small to him, and it often takes you a lot of convincing to get him to not spend hefty amounts of cash on you.

he feels it's necessary, to take care of his sweet girl like any man should — toji knows nobody can pamper you as well as he does, so he makes sure his money is spent wisely in making you feel safe and content.

you don't know how to tell him that there's no need for all of it, that you just want him to be with you — it's only until one day when you're coughing and sneezing in bed that you have to, after toji's constant pestering about hiring a family doctor.

"tch, baby," toji's voice echoes throughout the spacious bedroom. "shit—you're burning up."

"i'm fine," your voice is hoarse, nose crinkling at the incoming sneeze. "achoo!—"

he frowns, and the scar on his lip shifts downward. he sits on the edge of the bed, thick fingers moving stray hairs away from your face. "told ya we shouldn't have gone last night."

you shake your head. "it was your friend's birthday."

"does it matter, [name]?" he sounds stern. he only ever acts strict with you when he's really worried. "y'were already falling sick yesterday."

you reach for the box of tissues, fingers trying to reach inside the packaging for another piece, but you seem to have used all of them up — the 3rd time today.

"can you stay home, toji?"

it's one simple request that has him nodding. if you didn't mention it, he thinks he would've forgotten all about work — toji was much too worried to let you stay home alone, while a random doctor he hires on the day of attends to you. he much rather take care of you himself.

"i think i'll fuckin' have to," toji answers, frown plastered on his face out of pure worry; he has no idea how happy his reply makes you — you were more than comfortable with the idea of him taking care of you. "'m too worried to let you be alone."

"thank you, toji," you smile up at him and he feels his face burn up, so much that he thinks he feels hotter than you; "you always take such good care of me."

he always does. there was no doubt about it.

it's then that toji fushiguro stands up, his feet quick in making it's way to the bathroom to prepare a cold towel to plaster on top of your forehead. his actions are quick, wanting to make you feel better as soon as possible; your pale lips and tired eyes worried him more than he'd like to admit.

he ends up cooking the worst chicken noodle soup ever, but you chug it down with a grateful smile and a kiss to toji's cheek.

"fuck," he mumbles, sounding almost annoyed. "think i'm gonna get a fever now, too."

the smirk on his face tells you everything, though — at least now he knows money can't buy this.

────────────────────────

NANAMI KENTO is the type of man to do as you please, whenever you please, even if it's something you didn't even ask for.

he loves to see the smile on your face, the way your eyes sparkle when he agrees to help you with something just because you want him to — he can never get sick of the way your voice thanks him.

this is especially true in times of emergency.

it's a friday night and you're having dinner with nanami, legs crossed underneath the marbled tabletop — your silk emerald green dress flows perfectly, hugs your body just right; you think you did a good job picking it out today.

nanami had a range of activities planned out for tonight. it was your anniversary — dinner, then a film festival, then whatever surprise he kept a secret after.

you didn't try to snoop this time, genuinely thrilled to have such a special night with your lover; you were always one to love surprises, especially the ones from nanami.

beautiful, slow tempo jazz plays in the italian restaurant — you feel like you're from a different time, enjoying such authentic food.

"ken," you smile. "you should try some of this."

he doesn't respond for a bit. he's been looking at you with dreamy eyes, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lip; it's not until you giggle that he snaps out of whatever state he was just in.

"sorry, darling," nanami clears his throat. "you just look absolutely breathtaking tonight."

you physically feel the blood rush to your cheeks, too fast that it's almost embarrassing: kento truly knew how to fluster you.

you spin the fork in your hand clockwise, picking up a ball of pasta. "do i not look breathtaking every night?"

nanami chuckles, fingers controlling the knife sawing away at the steak that sits ready on his plate. "stop teasing. you know i think you're beautiful every second—"

plop.

your eyes widen, feeling a damp spot on your thigh. your fork suddenly feels lighter, and your eyes dart down to your dress that now has a patch of spaghetti sauce.

your eyes forcefully close shut in embarrassment, fingers rubbing your temples as you sigh.

"shit," you curse under your breath. "i'm sorry, kento."

he smiles, shaking his head. "what are you apologising for? you didn't drop it on purpose."

nanami sees the frown that drags your smile away, and he feels his heart sink. he knows you really loved that dress — and so he asks you to just enjoy your meal and that he'll make something work.

it's then that his plan derails, just a little. you two are running late to the film festival, but he couldn't think of any better solution.

"wait a little, okay?"

nanami parks the car, and his feet quickly lead him out and into the mall for a little over 10 minutes — when he returns, it's with a black bag with gold printed letters.

oddly familiar, you think.

he steps into the driver's seat, shuts the door and opens the bag: it's the same dress you're wearing, just in a different colour — blue.

nevertheless, you can't help the smile that creeps up on your face. "ken.. you really didn't—"

"yes, i had to." he interrupts. "i know it's not green, but i hope it's okay."

"thank you, love." you say, voice too sweet that nanami remembers all the reasons he does these things for you — he thinks he'll never get tired of it.

020224 — happpyy february ! also i think nanami's one is a little ermm but we rock we roll life moves on yolo :( i got lazy towards the end but i tried Okay

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kywaslost · 1 year

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Sleeping With The Ninja

A/N: I guess it’s about time I finally get something posted… I’ve been in this depressive slump for a while, especially because of the way my friends have been treating me, and for some strange reason Ninjago has been my source of comfort, so here’s this. And I made them platonic, idrk why.

Kai: Person A falling asleep in Person B’s shoulder/chest/lap and Person B really needs to get up to go do something but doesn’t want to wake Person A.

Today’s tasks have taken a toll on you. It was a chore day on the Bounty, but around lunch a call came in requesting help from the ninja. You went with Cole to take care of what you thought would be a simple mission, but it ended up taking 5 hours and leaving the both of you bruised and battered. It was a bank robbery, but on a much larger scale than you thought. There were so many ‘villains’ to catch while also protecting civilians. It was a tough task for only two ninja.

You didn’t get back to the Bounty until after dinner and you were exhausted. You barely had enough energy to shower, and it took you twice as long to complete the task and change into something more comfortable. You still had a few chores to do, but Wu dismissed them for you to complete in the morning. You didn’t have enough energy to do anything other than sleep, but it was only almost 7 at night and too early to go to bed.

Stepping into the gaming room to find a way to kill time, you spot your best friend Kai sitting on the floor, sorting through the various video games and stacking them neatly. You quickly walked over to him, sat down beside him, and laid your head down on his lap.

“Oh, hey Y/N,” he greeted with a smile. “How was it?”

You only shook your head, burying your face into Kai’s knee.

“Not well?”

“I’m exhausted,” you muttered, closing your eyes. “ ‘Ma lay here a minute.

Your words blurred together slightly. Kai didn’t say anything as he finished up sorting and stacking the video games.

It didn’t take long for him to finish, and Kai needed to finish a few other chores before he was allowed to turn in for the night. You were still laying on his lap, so Kai said softly, “I’ve got to get up, Y/N. You should go to bed anyway.” Except he didn’t receive a response. Leaning over to look at your face, Kai asked, “Y/N?” Your eyes were closed as Kai noticed you were sound while resting on his lap.

Kai smiled softly, pulling out his phone. He was totally going to tease you for this later. Taking a picture of your sleeping form, Kai set his phone to the side and looked around the room. He had to finish his chores so Wu wouldn’t get on to him, but he didn’t want to move you. You looked so peaceful and you looked really worn down when you first entered the room. Kai didn’t want to disturb you.

There was a basket of laundry not too far away that needed folding. Kai was pretty sure that was Jay’s chore, but surely he’d swap chores around so as not to disturb you. So Kai pulled the basket closer and began folding laundry, careful not to disturb you. He’d carry you to bed later, or wake you up, but for the moment he was going to let you rest.

Cole: Person A falling asleep during the car ride home and Person B carrying them into the house.

The whole team was sent on a long single-day mission, leaving early in the morning and returning late into the night. You were all piled into one of the many vehicles that could carry you and soft music was playing in the background. Lloyd was driving as Kai sat shotgun, talking quietly to keep both Lloyd and himself awake. Nya was passed out on Jay’s shoulder, and Jay leaned over on Zane. The nindroid stared out the window quietly, joining in on Lloyd and Kai’s discussion every now and then.

You sat beside Cole in the back of the vehicle in a peaceful silence. You were curled up with your feet up on the seat between the two of you, drifting in and out of sleep as you watched a movie with Cole on his phone. As time passed, your feet slid off of the seat and your eyes began to droop. Your head now rested against Cole’s shoulder. Sometime later, your eyes closed for good as you slept soundly against your friend.

By the time you’d reached the monastery, you were passed out still, except you had moved to lean against your window.

“We’re here,” Lloyd called softly to those who were still awake or somewhat aware of their surroundings. Nya had just woken up, and Jay was in the process of waking up. As people started getting out of the car, Cole noticed that you were still knocked out beside him.

He contemplated waking you up, but you were hit pretty hard during the mission and he wanted you to rest as much as you could. So, in response, Cole slowly slid one arm under your knees and one behind your back. He pulled you close to his chest and slid out of the vehicle, kicking the door shut behind him.

“Aw, look at Cole being a gentleman,” Jay laughed slightly.

The earth ninja glared at Jay. “I don’t want to wake them.”

Following the others into the monastery, Cole carried you up the stairs and to your bedroom. He pulled back your blanket, gently laid you down, and tucked you in. You began to move in your sleep, and Cole froze. He was afraid he had woken you up, but watched as you rolled onto your side and buried your face into your blanket.

Cole smiled softly, then leaned down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead. He pushed the hair out of your face before leaving you be for the rest of the night.

Jay: Person A and Person B sleeping in the same bed and Person A keeps waking up cold because person B has pulled all the blankets off of them.

Having a movie night with Jay leads to you falling asleep in the same bed as him, his laptop sitting in between the two of you. You lay closest to the wall, back to Jay as you bury yourself in Jay’s blanket. You hadn’t been asleep for long, but you fell asleep before Jay. You’d say your sleep was quite peaceful, or it was until you were exposed to the chilly air abruptly. Opening your eyes, you realized that you no longer had a blanket.

Rolling over, you saw Jay with the blanket you were previously sharing. He was still asleep and didn’t seem to be aware of his actions. You grunted slightly as you pulled the blanket back towards you, enough to cover yourself as you rolled back over and closed your eyes.

It didn’t take long for you to be awoken again by Jay yanking the blankets off of you. It happened several times within the next 15 minutes, and you finally had had enough. Crawling out of Jay’s bed, you stomped over to his closet, pulled out his spare blanket, and made yourself comfortable back on your side of his bed. You closed his computer, tucked it away at the foot of the bed, and layed back down and finally fell asleep for the rest of the night.

When you were awoken by Jay in the morning, he had asked why you had a different blanket. “Where did you even find that?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

You glared at him playfully from where you still lay. “In the closet. You kept taking the blanket we were sharing. I finally had enough so I took your spare.” You lightly kicked him off of the bed. “I’m not sharing a blanket with you anymore.” Your words only made Jay smile with a small laugh, and you couldn’t help but laugh with him.

Zane: Person A can’t sleep so Person B sings them a lullaby.

You weren’t sure what time it was. You remembered leaving your room around 1:45 a.m. but you had been out on the deck of the bounty for a while. You had tried for hours to fall asleep, but you finally called it quits and headed outside to get some fresh air. You hated how you were feeling at the moment. Your body was so exhausted you couldn’t stand, so you resorted to leaning against the railing on the edge of the ship. Yet you couldn’t seem to rest in the slightest.

You were scared out of your mind when a cool hand was placed on your shoulder. Shooting upright and wiping your head around, your fearful gaze met Zane’s blue eyes. The nindroid was kneeling behind you, looking at you worriedly. “Are you alright, Y/N?”

You blinked slowly, then turned your head to look over the edge of the railing. Shrugging, you muttered, “Can’t sleep.”

Zane’s brows furrowed. “You don’t look well. Maybe you should come inside.”

You shook your head. “I like it out here.”

With a sigh, Zane moved to sit beside you, pulling you to lean onto his shoulder. “Then I will stay here with you.”

You hummed contently, nuzzling your cheek into his shoulder. The two of you sat in silence for a moment, enjoying each other’s company. You still couldn’t seem to fall asleep, but you were much more relaxed. “Hey Zane?”

“Yes?”

You hesitated for a moment. “Do- do you think you could do something for me?”

Zane’s voice was gentle as he responded with, “Of course.”

“Could you hum something?” You hoped you weren’t asking too much from your friend, but his voice was so soothing. There would be times when Zane would be driving the team home from a mission, and he’d hum quietly to himself when he thought everyone else was asleep. And if you were sneaky you could catch him humming to himself while making dinner. There was just something about his voice that calmed you.

“I suppose I could.” Zane wrapped an arm around you so you could get more comfortable before he began to hum quietly. You could hear his voice vibrating lowly through his chest, and you closed your eyes to enjoy the peacefulness of it all. For the first time that night, you felt like you could finally close your eyes and get some rest.

After a few minutes, Zane looked down to check on you. You hadn’t said anything in a while, and your breathing had changed. The nindroid smiled softly when he saw you asleep on his shoulder. He thought you looked exhausted when he first found you, enough to make you sick. He was just glad you were finally resting. Zane wanted to carry you back to your room, but he was afraid of waking you, and it was a nice night. He did adjust you, however, so you were more comfortable. Starting to hum again, Zane watched over you for the rest of the night.

Lloyd: Person A can tell that Person B is having a nightmare because they’re making weird noises/motions in their sleep so Person A wakes them up and asks if they’re ok.

Lloyd wasn’t known to be one of the deeper sleepers on the team. In fact, he was probably one of the lightest sleepers out there. It didn’t help that some of his roommates were loud sleepers. Jay talked in his sleep, and Cole snored excessively loud. It drove Lloyd insane on nights when he was exhausted but would be awoken several times due to his brothers, but he touched through it most of the time.

You never really made noise while you slept, and that’s what allowed Lloyd to get a full night’s rest. The two of you were best friends, and the two of you often spent nights together in one of your rooms. Especially during the day, when Lloyd wants to take a nap, he’d settle down in your room for a few hours while you either napped with him, or worked on something quietly.

Afternoon training had finally ended and everyone was either in the process of showering and settling down or getting ready for dinner. It didn’t take long for you to shower, change, and curl up under your blanket while you waited for dinner, and it didn’t take much longer for Lloyd to come knocking on your door.

“Hey Y/N,” the ninja greeted with a gentle smile as he leaned against your doorframe. “Mind if I come in?”

You looked up from your phone and scooted over on your bed, patting the spot next to you. “Not at all!”

Lloyd flopped down beside you with a groan. “Man, am I beat. HIs blonde hair fanned over your pillow, and Lloyd tilted his head up to look at you, still smiling. “Whatcha watching?” He scooted further up the bed, moving to rest his head right above your shoulder to look at your phone. His hair tickled your face slightly, and you could smell his shampoo from the shower he must have just taken.

“Just social media, nothing much,” you answered, turning your phone off and setting it beside you. You adjusted yourself to rest on Lloyd’s shoulder, burying your face on the side of his clothed chest. In response, the green ninja wrapped an arm around you. “I could go for a nap right about now.”

Lloyd’s fell to rest on top of your own. With a contented sigh, he said, “Me too.” The two of you fell into a soft silence as Lloyd pulled your blanket over himself and began to doze off.

It didn’t take long for Lloyd to be woken up by you. He woke up quicker than usual, because you almost never made noise in your sleep, especially soft whimpers and whines. Opening his eyes, Lloyd immediately scans the room for any threats. There seemed to be nothing harmful that he could see. The two of you were the only ones in your room, and you were still asleep beside him. That’s when Lloyd noticed how distressed you were. Your back was to the ninja, but he could still see how quickly you were breathing. Your shoulders shook, and you kept moving slightly.

Lloyd was no stranger to nightmares, and he knew how much it could mean to someone to be awoken and comforted by a close friend. So Lloyd gently wraps his arms around you and turns you around to place your head on his chest again. He keeps one hand around your waist and moves his other to run through your hair. “You’re alright,” he said softly, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. “Wake up Y/N, you’re alright. I’ve got you.” It took a lot of gentle caresses and soft words for Lloyd to wake you up, but eventually your eyes opened and you were pulled away from your nightmare.

You weren’t sure where you were at first, but it didn’t take long for you to recognize your best friend beside you, covered by your favorite blanket and watching you with watery eyes. “Are you alright?” Lloyd asked as he placed a hand on your shoulder. “You had a nightmare.”

You took a deep breath, releasing it shakily. You shrugged your shoulders, slowly curling in on yourself against Lloyd. “I think so?”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“I don’t remember it.” Part of you was grateful you couldn’t remember the dream, but you felt terrible for waking your friend. “I’m sorry for waking you up. I know that’s why you sleep in here, cause I never --”

“Hey, don’t be sorry,” the green ninja cut you off, hugging you tighter against him. “I’d wake up a thousand times every night if that meant you’d rest peacefully.” He smiled at the thought. “I really don't mind. And, besides, I think dinner is almost ready. We’d be waking up soon anyway.” He was silent for a moment. “You sure you’re ok?”

“Yeah, I’m alright.” You smiled softly, and added, “Thank you Lloyd.”

“Anytime.”

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miyamoratsumuu · 10 months

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♡ 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐬𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐝, 𝐰/ 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐛𝐨𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 ♡

characters: h.sero, k.bakugou, e.kirishima, d.kaminari, m.ashido

note: quirkless au (?), implied fem partner for all of them, lowercase intended. pictures used are not mine, all of them are found on pinterest!!:)

navigation . . .

mha masterlist

SERO HANTA "let me make your heart happy, amor"

afternoon naps on his hammock!!! being wrapped up all cozy in his arms while the hammock gently swayed the both of you side to side.

dates with him could range from eating ramen on your bed while watching the latest episodes of your favorite series, to going to different places (ex. an aquarium, a restaurant, a park, yeah you get it) just because he adores seeing you dressed up in different outfits.

and even though you think you practically wear similar outfits to almost every date you guys go to, he still thinks you look stunning. he's a grateful and appreciative man, what can I say?

before the two of you head out, though, he has this thing where he would always take your hand and twirl you around. he says he has to relish being the only one to see you this gorgeous before stepping outside the door and having everyone else see your beauty as well.

hanta is big on acts of service. the two of you just pulled up at home from a date night and he's already stepping out the car to jog over to the passenger's side to open the car door for you.

the two of you have been walking around the park for some time now and he notices that your shoelaces got untied. before you know it, he's asked you to stop walking for a sec and is already kneeling in front of you and tying your laces.

and for the nights the both of you just want some fresh air but are too tired to get out of the house entirely, you guys spend hours upon hours on the rooftop lying down on a futon bed, watching the stars, and content with each other's company.

BAKUGOU KATSUKI "you're such a dumbass, sweetheart. you're lucky I love you"

it's been said and reasoned that bakugou would be someone that loves hiking or mountain climbing, that it would be a hobby of his, and he has done it multiple times. meaning he would know the areas on the mountain he's gone hiking on like the back of his hand.

he would know the spot where the air would be the breeziest, the spot where you could gaze at the sky at night and have a clear view of the stars, the spot where the river is clean and safe to rest by. most importantly, he knows where the both of you could watch the sunset together in peace, basking in the comfortable silence between you two.

katsuki is a morning person. he wakes up at 4 or 5, most likely to go out on a jog. on the mornings he comes back from his run and you're asleep still in bed, he makes breakfast and coffee for the both of you. and when he's feeling extra generous, he'd wake you up with breakfast in bed.

whenever the two of you go out for example to the mall, and you're feeling more hyper than usual, you somehow end up wandering away from katsuki without him noticing just because you saw a pretty keychain at the window of a store. when he turned around because he didn't feel your hand holding his anymore, he was surprised to see you weren't there at all. he had a pretty hard time finding you that day since he forgot he couldn't call you because you gave your phone to him saying you're afraid you might accidentally leave it somewhere and forget.

after that's happened a couple of times, he learned to just carry you around (in a not so elegant way, may I add) just so you would stop wandering away from him and having him look for you everywhere.

we all know he cooks. and he's good at it, obvs. some time in your relationship, you ask (beg) him to teach you how to cook. whether you really don't know how to, or you were just looking for ways to spend more time with him. at first he thought it would be a waste of time since he could cook for the both of you anyways. his words not mine. but eventually, after some convincing, (he knew you wouldn't stop pestering him about this) he gave in and taught you how to cook.

and on the nights neither of you have the energy to make dinner, you take quick trips to any fast food restaurants that are close by. (much to katsuki's dismay)

KIRISHIMA EIJIRO "put your hand on my chest, darling. can you feel how it beats for you?"

when I saw the pic at the middle left I immediately thought of kiri. it's just idk I always thought of him as such a loveable sap.

whenever you feel sad, under the weather, or generally just upset, eijiro sets a mission to make you feel better asap. he often does that by taking it upon himself to wrap you in his arms completely. almost in a sense of shielding you from the world and anything that could possibly harm you.

he's aware of how big of a man he is physically. why wouldn't he be after so long of consistently going to the gym? despite that, he's the type to engage in play fights with you. doesn't matter if it involves pillows, tickles, or whatever else.

and obviously, with all that muscle of his, it's given that he'd win all those fights. but he doesn't. he humors you, let's you win from time to time, just so he could see that wide grin of yours when you manage to pin his arms down after hitting each other with your pillows for minutes now.

eijiro loves physical touch. being able to feel you reminds him of how this is real. it reminds him that you're there for him. and he'll always be there for you too.

therefore, he always has to be touching you. whether it be in the form of a hug, intertwined fingers, his arm around your shoulder, or just a single finger poking at you.

every time the two of you go on a date, he always brings you a gift when he picks you up. one time it was a shark stuffed toy, another time it was a slice of your favorite cake, and sometimes it was a bouquet of flowers. he would give you anything that reminds him of you and everything he knows would make you happy. heck he'd give you the world if he could.

KAMINARI DENKI "hey, sunshine! you're everything to me. you know that, right?"

every time the two of you go out, it's an unspoken rule in your relationship to make sure you take pictures of each other. the both of you say that it's for the memories, but the truth is that you guys just think that one another is so pretty.

denki is starting to think how ridiculous it is that he still gets flustered by how good you look whenever the two of you go on dates, considering the huge amount of times you have gone out with each other.

dates with him often include games, theme parks, arcades, and whatnot. he says it gives him the chance to show off to you how great of a boyfriend he really is whenever he wins a game or when he wins you something.

on late nights where neither of you are managing to get some sleep and are starting to get restless, you end up either at a playground or a convenience store near by. you go to a playground when both of you still have a decent amount of energy you need to get out of your system. on the other hand, you two go to a convenience store just to pick up snacks for a late movie night where you both know very well you're going to fall asleep to before 30 minutes has even gone by in the film.

there are afternoons where the both of you prefer a quiet time, and you could only be doing one of three things. you playing with denki's hair, denki writing on your hand, or you both taking a nap while having your arms around each other.

y'all def make playlists for each other

denki absolutely adores the idea of having matching outfits and clothes with you. the clothes that you both wear that pair well together makes him feel like you two make a great pair yourselves. he goes shopping with you just for the chances to find matching clothes for you both. whether it be pajamas, casual clothes, or something like the pikachu onesies he loves.

MINA ASHIDO "you're the prettiest sweetheart I've ever set my eyes on, honey"

there's something about the way mina dances that just wants you to do the same. you may not know how to dance but that doesn't matter. she guides both of your bodies through the rhythm of the music that's playing in the background, all the while both of you are looking at each other like you're the only people that matter right now.

yeah, that's how some late nights are when you're with her.

I also feel like she's the type to know how to roller skate, and she loves it. she loves the feeling of being able to freely glide on the floor without a care in the world. and since she loves it, it only makes sense that she introduces it to you.

the two of you often go on dates to the roller skating rink, and she makes sure that the both of you have so. much. fun. she's not letting the day end until both of you have jaw aching grins on your faces.

she loves loves loves having matching things with you!!! unlike denki, she doesn't only like having matching clothes with you. the two of you have matching shoes, necklaces, bracelets, hair accessories, purses, almost anything you could think of.

you know when you're supposed to be doing a deep clean in your room but then you find stuff that you completely forgot you own underneath your other stuff that's been piled up then you get distracted by it and play around with everything? yeah that's you and mina on weekends you decide to actually clean up either one of your bedrooms. any found accessory that you guys come across, you manage to put everything on.

intimate times with mina consists of doing skincare together, doing each other's makeup, and generally just making each other the prettiest you've ever felt. all while you're listening to music together.

#I'll probably turn this into a series #bakusquad x reader #I wanted to add songs for each but I realized I was terrible at that kinda stuff #bakugou x reader #kirishima x reader #sero x reader #kaminari x reader #ashido x reader #bakusquad moodboard #mha headcanons #bakugou headcanons #kirishima headcanons #sero headcanons #kaminari headcanons #ashido headcanons #bakusquad headcanons #☁️; [headcanons]

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dilutedconfusion · 15 days

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A Moth to a Flame

Eustass Kid x F!Reader (Part 5)

Summary: It’s the morning after. Not the kind of morning where you wake up in somebody else’s bed but the kind where you’re wounded and in a cot. Kid is feeling bad. You’re feeling bad. Let’s see how the two of you handle the wretched ‘what happened last night’ conversation.

Warnings: Mentions of blood & broken bones

Word Count: a blasphemous 9k

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Tags: @st4rfevrr @archangelshavethetardis @likeeliterallywtf @tremendoushorsepatrolgoth @tulipps-maehem @thesnailus @shamblespirate @gabi-moureira @ferretsqueen

A kaleidoscope of colors took up your worldview.

Swirling in an endless grace of sweet blues, deep rich greens, and soft mellow browns. None of them were very recognizable shape-wise. Each was holding something akin to maybe a building floating on its axis or a flower harshly bent at the stem. Either way, you didn’t care.

Eyes heavy with every tear you had ever cried in your lifetime somehow pressed against your pupil. The world cast ripples in your vision until they slowly turned into something more recognizable. Something that felt like home.

Or at least a very small portion of it.

“Just stay here. Don’t make a sound no matter what you hear okay?”

Your Dad's voice floated towards you warm and reassuringly like it always was. Soft eyes followed by his large hand reaching out to hold yours. Your round eyes blinked trying to see him. See him past the water ripples clouding your vision. You felt a warm liquid slide softly down your cheeks before the rippling water gave way.

“Pumpkin, it's okay. We’ve practiced this, remember? Nothing to be worried about, I'll come get you when it’s over.”

You were somewhere mostly dark. The walls were tight and small around you. Your father bent down on one knee, looking into the small wooden cave you reside in. A bright light behind him filtered through his hair softly. Looking down you felt his big hand tighten around your rather small one. Small and soft like it was new to the world. You squeezed his hand back with what little strength you had, urging him not to leave you alone again for just this once.

“D-Dad don’t leave me.” With each word that slipped past your tongue, it sputtered out messily. Your voice was high-pitched and whiny. Desperately wanting to just claw onto the man in front of you so he wouldn’t have the chance to leave. But you also supposed that he was holding onto your hand so tight so that you couldn’t move. So you couldn’t fight to stay with him.

“Baby we’ve been through this I can’t-” a loud rousing of yells erupted from nearby. The piercing sounds of gunfire broke any sense of peace. Each shattering echo made you flinch violently with every draw. Your father turned his head off to the left, eyes trained carefully at something in the room before he looked back at you. All that reassuring love once smeared on his face was gone. Instead that dreaded worry had replaced it.

He let go of your hand quickly. Bringing his hand closer to his torso so you didn’t have a chance to grip him. “I need to go. Stay here. Be silent. Don’t come out unless you hear our secret knock.”

You barely even heard him when he spoke. Barely even processed anything that was happening. All you could hear was your heartbeat twitching in your ears and the sounds of yelling outside.

It made a lump form in your throat. Lunging to either wail or scream or do something. To just do anything but you remained silent. That look in your father's eyes wouldn’t allow anything but silence and you knew that.

So he quickly grabbed something off the wall, using it to close the gap between you and the rest of the world. Between you and him.

Darkness slowly seeped into your space until nothing but a slit of light was fluttering through. Your Dads face peeking in one last time.“I love you Y/N.” He whispered, his voice soft and delicate against your ears like a stray feather floating in the wind.

But before you could even manage to speak he shut the door completely. Leaving you alone with the silence and the screams once again.

__________

Unlike all your other dreams this one didn’t cause you to wake up in a panic. Covered in sweat, your eyes groggily peeled themselves open. Met with just an average wooden ceiling in your view.

Your head was light as if it was full of helium. The corners of your vision were covered in a soft vignette just daring you to fall back asleep. Daring you to slip back into the comfortable numbness. To go back into the hiding place you had so long ago.

That is until you felt a sharp pain erupt in your chest when you breathed in a little too deep. In a rush, you tried to sit up. Contracting your muscles as always but instead of a smooth arising, a sharp pain stabbed at the center of your chest. A yelp escaped your lips and your back immediately stiffened against the cot once more. Jaw clenched in pain as you felt the raw flesh of your throat and lungs. It was like a cat had crawled inside you and scratched down your throat making you regret having made a single noise.

With your head propped up on a thin pillow, you manage to crane your neck to look at the rest of the room.

Am I in a med bay?

It was a small space and there was only one other cot on the other side of the room. The walls only held a whiteboard with some kind of tally marks and a covered window. A couple of counters and cabinets lined tightly right next to you. A mess of what looked like gauze, bandages, and tubs of what you supposed were ointment splayed out. Other than that you were left wishing for more discernible features about where in the hell you are.

Someone had been in here. Someone helped me. Where the hell are they now and what happened?

Being weak and vulnerable in a place you didn’t recognize wasn’t your ideal wake-up situation. But you also supposed whoever brought you here had helped you out. However, that didn’t make the sense of unease in your gut settle down much.

Fingers and palms splaying against the canvas of the cot you tried to ease yourself up yet again. Going at it a bit slower this time yet the second you applied some pressure you hissed in pain. Your hands stinging like sharp needles were tracing each fine line.

Taking your hands off the cot in a swift motion you stared at them now hovering gently above your face. They were both laced tightly with soft yet slightly scratchy bandages. An inkblot test of what you could only assume was blood seeping through parts of them.

I got injured on my literal fucking hands. My stupid hands of all places. What the hell did I do? Fight a raccoon or something?

Rolling your eyes you decided to trace your body for injuries before you tried to sit up again. Hands tracing over your shirt as you looked down at your body.

Wait a minute. Your hands paused, picking up the fabric of your shirt and lifting it closer to your face. This is not my shirt.

Eyes widening to panic you quickly let go of your shirt and felt down your hips to meet the hem of your pants. And these are not my pants.

You were in what seemed to be some spare clothes. Your underwear was still gratefully intact but the rest was just a pair of loose pants and a T-shirt one size too small.

Mouth agape and staring at the ceiling a warm wave of embarrassment washed over you. The apples of your cheeks and the nausea in your gut only getting worse.

Rubbing your hands over your face you tried to hold back any and all complaints. Your voice was fried and no matter how much you wanted to kick yourself and cry about it you just couldn’t.

As you shifted on the cot your hair hit the side of your face. A strong scent that you instantly noticed was the sea lapping at your nose. Your nose scrunched up as you paused your pity fest to sniff at it more tentatively. Not only did your hair smell like seawater, but so did your skin itself. Like you’d been sleeping in a bed of seaweed all night and hadn’t noticed.

Did I go for a swim or something? Gosh did I drown? Even thinking that made you swallow hard. Shame and dread at the fact that you might've done something unwise yet again. But drowning.

The undertones of that world sunk and swallowed your gut hole. Leaving you breathless in the worst of ways as a downpour of shame filled the dips and hills of your mind.

I remember being cold last night. I remember going to that bar. I remember walking home but then I must’ve done something. What the fuck is wrong with me?

Avoiding the imminent doom looming around you, you slipped your hand under your shirt. Immediately feeling the same tight bandage on your side and the center of your chest.

Great so I either have one or two broken bones. You softly rubbed the bandage on your side. Feeling the stark marks of what felt like torn flesh underneath. It wasn’t aching that badly but you knew if you tried to get up again it would.

Bracing yourself for the waves of pain pinching at your flesh you sat up finally. Eyeing the door across the room with small tears pricking your eyes. Your legs surprisingly didn’t hurt at all. They felt tired and worn out as you slung them over the edge of the cot. Yet when you stood up not a shot of pain erupted from anywhere.

Well, that’s good. Just upper body stuff then. You thought, holding onto the cot to try and find your balance. You could feel your body heaving a bit. Which finally let you take notice of the slight sway your body held. However, you couldn’t tell if it was just you being uneasy or the rest of the room swaying along with you.

This…feels familiar. A wave of nostalgia washed over you. Something so distant in your memory yet so raw with emotion. Looking at the window across the room a thought came to mind.

Am I on a boat?

It was a porthole with a blind shut over it. You were almost a bit afraid to go to that window. To open that stupid shade blocking out the warm light of day just to see something maybe you didn’t want to see.

No no no…I’m not on a boat. Why would I be on a boat? This person just likes porthole windows. Weird decorative choice but I’m not one to judge.

Your body crept towards it. A funny yet scared-looking smile tugging at the corners of your lips. If you didn’t see land on the other side of the window something in you was going to snap.

If I just see nothing but ocean on the other side of that window and not even a speck of island then…

You pinched the blind between your pointer and thumb. Lightly tugging on it until it naturally sprung upwards. A wave of light hitting your eyes as you licked your dry lips nervously.

Oh, thank the fucking lord. The docks of your home island were off to your left. The village was out of your line of sight but there was no mistaking the woods and shoreline you’d come to know as home.

Yet this sense of relief didn’t last long. The swaying of your body wasn’t all you then. Nearly pressing your nose to the glass you saw the soft churn of waves hit the hull below you.

So I��m on someone’s boat. A big boat clearly. A stranger's boat. You couldn’t see anything to identify whose boat you were on from this point of view. The window wasn’t the kind that opened so you were stuck just knowing the bare minimum of your situation.

I haven’t been on a ship in…

A growing wave of nausea hit your stomach again. Pitching forward as an unreasonable wave of panic stretches across you.

Walking staggerly to the door you reached out to open it. Giving only a moment's notice to listen quietly for any sound on the other side before quietly turning the knob and peering out.

It was a hallway that stretched out to your left and right. Even if you hadn’t seen the ocean on the other side of that window you still would’ve been able to tell this was a boat from the hallway.

The slightly lower ceilings, the wood paneling making every surface, the lanterns hung up periodically, and the few dozen scratches or patched-up holes from fights. It was tight and it smelled of the sea through faint drafts.

It's as if it had been ripped straight out of your childhood. Taunting you in an eerie reminder of what you were and somehow still suffocating as always.

I have to get out of here.

Without a thought you headed towards your left, closing the med bay door softly behind you. You needed to find a way onto the main deck and though you didn’t know your way around all you needed to find was a set of stairs.

If I’m on the lower side of the hull I gotta be at least one level down. Maybe one or two sets of stairs and I’m out of here.

With panic lacing your heels you noticed an open section of wall lining your right. You hurried towards it as fast as your weak body could manage before turning to see a beloved stairwell leading up. With bated breath, you started to climb it. Your side and chest aching from each little movement. The stairs creaking in some spots which only built upon the nerves ailing you.

When you finally breached onto the upper level you found nothing but another hallway to scour. Though you noticed this hallway was lined with windows unlike the last. Like a projector slide flashing between images, you saw those same windows filled with nothing but the sky and sea. Blurry silhouettes of men much taller than you walking past. Their rough visages and kind smiles just after visions in the blinding light. You blinked in a rush, rubbing over the space of your eyes and fumbling along the hallway.

It was like all the blood had been drained from your body. Weak and lightheaded you swayed with each step. Daring to pass out as another strong wave of nausea wrestled with your gut. It swelled into a deep ache that had you nearly hunched over. Grabbing your stomach tightly and using the wall for support as you shuffled along.

You couldn’t tell why this was happening. Well, you had a good guess but this sudden enveloping feeling constricting your throat was one you’ve had before. Another set of flash card images blurring your vision in memory of your father's much younger face, kneeled to look at you. Looking down the hallway you saw a door at its end. A bright light seeped through the slits and cast warm dusty rays across the floor.

I just need some fresh air. Some fresh air will fix this. I’ll be fine.

Yet this excruciating hallway seemed to be getting tighter and tighter with each step. You watched as the wall groaned as it crept closer toward your hobbled figure. Breath gasping in succession as fear arrogates your veins.

I need to get out of here. I need to get out of here. This thought was a sledgehammer driving into the front of your brain. Forcing you closer and closer to the door until that 30 feet became one and you were a step away from some sense of freedom. With a sweat-covered brow and a shaky hand, you pushed the door open with a loud creak.

Like a flash bomb, the sun hit your face and you could breathe once more.

__________

Kid hadn’t woken up feeling fresh and relieved. He hadn’t woken up with his body feeling in the best shape it's ever been. No aching, no crawling nerve pain, no head thumping like a toddler slapping the shit out of a drum. If he would just lie to himself a little then all of that could be true.

The fact that he had gotten around maybe 5 hours of sleep because he had to stay up in the med bay getting all his bandages replaced wasn’t real. The fact that Killer had to wake up Hip, the only semi-medic on their ship, to clean his stitches wasn’t real. The fact that instead of the screaming fight Kid was expecting from Killer, he was met with silence. Silence that spoke a thousand words of disappointment and shame. Leaving the Kid wishing they would’ve just punched it out like they always did.

But what Kid didn’t want to think was real. The thing that absolutely could not be real under any circumstances was the fact that he had brought a girl home. Not the kind of girl wanting cheap sex and some fake affection for just one night. Now that would’ve been normal. If anything maybe that's what he needed on his little break.

Yet instead of a girl dressed in lust, it was the kind that he was forced to stare at for an hour on the other side of the room. The kind that had burned into his retinas so he could see his mistake even when he closed his eyes. A big human-sized mistake just laying there like a corpse daring him to think she was real.

Because the second he reached his ship with you in tow he was hit over the head with a reality anvil. One that broke through the layer of alcohol, delusion, and sadness wrapped around his skull.

They didn’t know whether to treat their captain or the barely alive girl first. Why waste medical supplies on a stranger? So when he had watched Hip look her over he had barely paid attention to her words. Asking him what had happened and why he had brought her back. Though when Kid was finally excused, his body two steps away from slamming against the ground, he gave the fake girl one last look. Hips back to him as her hands traced over the figment of his imagination to check if she was even alive. She had been breathing softly the whole time Kid was forced to get fixed up but she was still dead asleep.

A part of him hoped she wouldn't wake up just so he wouldn’t have to deal with it in the morning.

But of course, morning had come to Kids begrudging dismay. Tossing around in sheets that now reeked of the sea because he hadn’t bothered to take a shower. He smelled, looked, and felt horrible.

I’d rather get beat by a bat than deal with this.

So little to say he started his day in a slump. The late morning did little to motivate him as he washed himself clean and then went to the kitchen to down a jug's worth of water. Dribbles of it spilled down his chin and onto the black tank top he wore. The loose swaying of shorts at his hips and the soft meandering steps of some flip flops gracing the halls.

Thankfully everyone else on the crew had started the day off by going into town to get the shopping done and over with. Kid could nearly see the stacked-up crates lining the dock outside in his near future. Yet he knew if he tried to help he’d get shooed away like some sort of child.

If they want me to be lazy I’ll be fucking lazy. I’m tired of trying.

With black coffee steaming gently out of the cup in his hand he sat down at one of the many tables in the mess hall. Trying to avoid the still very apparent problem that was probably still dead asleep just a floor below him.

He didn’t know what to make of last night. To him, it almost seemed like he was an entirely different person. One that wanted to wallow instead of rise to the challenge. One that wanted to give up instead of fight. One that wanted to save some girl because he could.

What the fuck is wrong with me? He rubbed over his face and brushed back his still slightly damp hair. No goggles to hold it up so it hung a tad bit looser around his face.

I saved one stranger and for what? For her to wake up and give me her thanks? I don’t give a shit about her. I don’t even know that bitches name.

There was no weaseling his way out of knowing why he had saved you. His choice to do it was entirely emotions-based instead of logic. There was no gain, no plan, no need for him to do anything when you fell into the sea.

I just...I just...Kid could barely think the words into existence let alone say it out loud. It’s one of the many reasons Killer had gone silent last night. Because no matter how many times he asked Kid why he did it, Kid couldn’t find an answer.

Kid’s thoughts were interrupted by the soft thudding of shoes walking down the hall. His body naturally froze as he heard the all too familiar footstep pattern of his first mate.

Why isn’t he out there with the rest of the crew? Shouldn’t he have left?

A sky blue and cream-colored mask came into sight as Killer rounded through the doorway. Taking a second to look Kid over but otherwise disregarding him as he turned sharply towards the open doorway of the kitchen. Not a single word leaving his lips.

Great. Now he's going to give me the cold shoulder then huh?

“So what? You’re just not going to talk to me?” Kid questioned demeaningly, a lick of vulnerability swirling underneath the thin surface of his tone.

Killer slowed to a stop, turning his head to gander once more at the redhead's large body filling up a small portion of the mess hall. “No. I just wanted coffee.” His voice was smooth and simple but Kid could still hear the underlying sarcasm he was barely holding back.

Kid clicked his tongue softly. Hardballing Killer as if he had said the most idiotic thing in the world. “So you decided to stay on the boat for some coffee? Shouldn’t you be out there? You’re the one in charge of the restock anyways.”

Killer’s voice punched out a little more than before. As if he was just now fully waking up. “I am but I thought you’d need me here. Can’t leave you alone with our little...problem.”

Is he tired? This thought floated in and out of Kids' brain immediately. Killer was always an early bird compared to him. But he knew if he could see past that mask of his, he might see the unusual purple hue sagging below Killer's eyes.

“I can handle it just fine. I’m going to give it a bit. Drink my goddamn coffee and then go down there and throw our problem out. Simple.” Kid’s voice didn’t sound as resolute as he hoped it would. He didn’t have a plan on how to handle this. He barely wanted to speak to the woman let alone throw her overboard, especially with all the injuries she held.

Injuries and death that me and my crew saved her from. Kid swiped his fingers over his eyes. Rubbing them to let the darkness behind his eyelids swirl.

Killer let out a low grumble and scratched the back of his head. Tufts of blonde hair getting frizzy as his voice became even more fatigued. “Is that right? Well, I think you’ll need me. If only to make sure you two don’t argue and she hopefully just leaves.”

Kid just stared blankly at Killer. Using the small amount of brain power he had left to look him over. He is tired. He only stayed up for an hour to watch me when I was getting patched up. Why the hell does he sound like that?

“Whatever. You don't think I can handle one girl so don’t fucking give me that.” Kid picked up his coffee mug. Taking a slow sip as he tentatively eyed his first mate.

Killer paused before he spoke. Chewing his lips a bit and turning back towards the kitchen doorway. Walking over to it and still talking to Kid despite the distance. “You can handle one girl but I don’t think you can handle one girl that you saved. She’s going to ask questions about what happened and why you did it. I’m going to be there to give answers when you inevitably fuck up and don’t say anything.”

Kids' eyes widened at that. A rush of embarrassment and a bit of anger rose to his cheeks. Taking another quick gulp of his coffee before cocking his head to the side. “You don’t know what I’m going to do. She doesn’t deserve any fucking answers so what does it matter anyways? You don’t have to be her shrink and tell her it's going to be alright.”

Killer's body slipped past the doorway and out of Kid's sight. Letting him only faintly listen to the sounds of him grabbing a mug and picking up the coffee jug. “Well if she was persistent about speaking to us last night then I doubt she won’t be this morning. You’re giving a psychotic fangirl a chance at being on our ship. Better yet the guy she wanted to talk to saved her. She’s going to ask questions. Questions I know you don’t want to answer.”

Killer spoke just loud enough for Kid to hear him. Kids face contorting more and more into pure and utter annoyance at the obvious facts that Killer was spilling. “She’s not a fangirl. We don’t have fans Killer were fucking pirates for Christ's sake.” Kid protested, his voice barely audible to Killer's ears.

“Yes, she is. She followed us last night. I know she messed with you or whatever. But love can often get mistaken for hatred. She probably just lied to herself for an excuse to be around us.”

Kid's eyes nearly popped out of his skull hearing that. The grip against his mug becoming firmer and firmer as he watched Killer stride back into sight. Now holding a steaming cup of coffee and heading over towards him.

“Don’t fucking say that to me.” That was all Kid could manage. If he said anything more than that a blood vessel might pop and he’d be left with the bloodshot eyes of an insane man.

Love can get mistaken for hatred? What the fuck is Killer on right now?

Killer eased down into the chair across from Kid. His mug thudding softly against the wooden table and a low grunt of discomfort rolling off his tongue.“What? Don’t you think that girl was flirting with you? I thought about it last night and it seemed weird. Like she had some sort of other agenda about why she was talking to you besides the whole ‘her being worried about you pillaging the town’ or whatever.”

As Killer settled in with his hand holding up his head by the soft fur of his chin, Kid was tensing up. His jaw stretched and snapped tight like he had to pry it open with a crowbar before speaking. His cheeks turning that uncharacteristically shy shade of red. “I don’t know why the fuck you’re telling me this. She can have whatever agenda she wants. I just don’t ever want to deal with her or see her ever again.”

Killer couldn’t help but find Kid's reaction a bit amusing even if it was surprising. Kid wasn’t one for affection and Killer knew that. That’s why seeing Kid turn red at the thought of this girl's supposed crush was extra funny. So much so that he couldn’t help but make it a little worse. “Then why are you getting red in the face? You’ve had girls swoon over you before. Is it just the fact that this one might want to get into your pants that bothers you?”

“Killer I’m going to reach over this table and rip your head off if you keep this up.”

Killer's tired demeanor became much more mischievous. A wry smile tugged at his lips and he leaned forward to speak in a sarcastic yet smooth and romantic way. “I bet it was amazing for her last night though. A big strong man comes to save her just at the right time-”

“Kil I swear to god-”

“Both of you were drenched and grasping onto one another. Looking into each other's eyes and whispering sweet nothings in the moonlight-”

“Killer shut the fuck up-”

“That girl was probably so turned on she was rubbing her thighs together. Wishing you’d just take her-”

“KILLER!” Killer got fully cut off when Kid lunged at him. Standing up and taking his first mate by the collar to tug him forward. Nearly knocking over his coffee in the process as Kid snarled at him.

Killer could barely hold back a laugh. Smiling wildly underneath his mask he softly patted Kid's arms to ease him off him. “Ah okay okay sorry. Couldn’t help myself. It’s payback for last night anyways.”

Kid's hand slowly loosened up. His cheeks burned a bright fiery red as he sat back down in his seat. Steam nearly puffed out of his nose as he took a deep breath. “Yeah? Well, it's a stupid fucking way to get your payback. It wasn’t like that. Quit making me out to be some kind of hero asshole.”

Killer eyed his captain in a attentive yet loving way. He loved whenever he got a chance to get under his skin like this.

And maybe this does make up for last night. We don’t have to focus on our fight. Just the girl.

“Well, I’m not letting it go. You saved some girl and brought her home. That’s hero behavior for sure,” Kid looked at Killer dead on, his face going slack with annoyance again. It made Killer pause for a moment feeling just a tad bit guilty, “But maybe it wasn’t romantic at all for her. Forget all that shit I said about love or whatever. I was just spitballing ideas anyway.”

“Well, I could tell. Saying that shit like you had any idea what you were talking about.” Kid rolled his eyes and finished off the last of his coffee. Letting the smooth and bitter liquid roll down into his stomach to gain an ounce of motivation for the day ahead.

Killer took a smooth sip of his coffee through the little bendy straw he brought along. Just nodding his head like he agreed though he was still pretty sure something more was going on with you.

Or maybe all that blushing means something more is going on with Kid.

A sudden loud noise erupted down the hall. It sounded close but at the same time echoed through the small enclosure and into the ears of the two men sitting idly together. Kid's body perked up, looking over at the doorway out into the hall expectantly.

“Is there anyone else on the ship right now?” Kid mumbled, looking over at Killer who had put his mug down almost instantly. Staring at the doorway more hesitantly than Kid.

“No. Just us. Everyone already left. I made sure of it.” They both looked over at each other. Their shared brain cells functioned at a slower rate before they both came to the same conclusion.

“It’s the girl.” Kid whispered, Killer's head nodding in agreement as they both started to stand up and head out into the hall. Kids empty mug and Killers half full one long forgotten as they walked towards the source of the sound.

“Goddamn, I was hoping she’d just stay asleep.” Kid mumbled to himself more than anything. Picking up the pace a bit as two sets of heels rampantly thudded against the wood below.

“I think it came from on deck.” Killer's voice was quiet. Mimicking the hesitation Kid's voice held. If they thought about it enough, they should be making their presence known. Yelling so she didn’t think she could run off with one of their possessions if that's what she wanted. But if they didn’t make their presence known, then maybe they wouldn’t have to deal with her. She could slink away on he own accord without talking to them.

It was a juxtaposition between hesitation and necessity as they reached a door. Pushing it open and stepping out together to scan the deck. A chill ran down Kid's spine as he felt the brisk wind hit his bare legs. Within an instant, he saw you but of course, you had a habit of surprising him at this point.

“Shit.” You mumbled under your breath. Panting softly as you clenched tightly onto the banister of the stairs leading down to the lowest part of the deck. Your face was a shade paler than usual. The blood ran cold inside of you as you desperately tried to pretend you hadn’t slipped on the stairs not a minute ago.

“H-Hey guys. What’s up?” Kid could instantly tell by your voice that you were hanging on by a thread.

Well, I think anyone with eyes could tell she’s a fucking mess.

“What are you doing?” Left Kid's lips before he could even really contemplate what was happening. Walking closer to the upper edge of the stairs to look down at you. Killer in tow with his hands crossed over his wide chest.

You looked between the two large men like you had done the first time you met them. The blondie is still quiet and reserved. The redhead, or Kid you supposed, is demeaning and talkative.

They’re already tall enough. They didn’t have to take the high ground for Christ's sake.

“Nothing.” Kids' eyebrows of course rose at that. Leaving you stuttering to come up with something that didn’t sound stupid. “I mean not nothing but definitely something. I don’t know.” Your body swayed a bit as you gripped the banister even tighter. You’re fingertips turned a shade whiter as you swallowed down what felt like oncoming nausea.

Did they kidnap me? Is that the only reason why they decided to patch me up was to sell me off? I can’t just tell them I’m leaving if that's the case.

“Well, you falling on the stairs doesn’t seem like nothing.” When the blondie spoke it almost partly startled you, it was the first time you could hear his voice. It was similar to Kids as if they were from the same area. But it was slightly higher and more raspy in tone. It almost made you forget what the man had even said. A blush rose to your cheeks as you shook your head defensively.

“Well, I’d like to see you try to walk down some stairs with wounds and nausea asshole.” That slipped past your tongue before you could even reel it back in. Still holding on for dear life as the panic seemingly never wanted to settle in your veins. “I feel like I got gutted. What the hell happened to me?”

Killer didn’t mind being called an asshole, he's been called much worse. But watching you spit that out with such a raw look of utter exhaustion and frustration on your face was a bit much. You seemed to be falling apart right in front of him for some reason.

Was she hurt that bad?

“What the fuck is with you? Are you about to keel over right now?” Kid took Killer's thoughts right out of his mind. The girl had barely walked that far from the med bay but she seemed to be sweating and breathing heavily like she had run a mile.

You frowned at the two men, taking a deep and shaky breath before you spoke. “I don’t like it on this ship. I want off and I want to know what happened.”

Whilst Kid's eyebrows furrowed, Killers raised. Confusion struck both of them at the mere fact that you didn’t seem to remember the events of last night. “So you don’t remember?” Killer asked calmly, taking a hesitant step down the stairs towards you. You’re shaky pupils locking onto him in fear.

“No, I don't remember. I don’t remember anything past…the walking home I think. What the fuck did you people do? Beat me and dunk me in water?”

The instant you said that Kids' anger rose from about an average 5 to an 8 out of 10. His one good hand clenched into a white line of knuckles as he stepped down the stairs in a stomping motion towards you. “We didn’t fucking beat you dumbass! We helped you. If I wanted to beat you I’d do a much better job than the fucking ocean did.”

The second Kid started stomping down the stairs towards you, you turned around. Finishing off the last couple of steps with trembling knees and scurrying out into the middle of the deck a good distance away from him. “Stay the fuck away from me!” You yelled putting your hands up defensively even though you felt like a pile of Play-Doh.

Kid paused when he reached the bottom of the stairs. Clicking his tongue and watching you with predator-like precision. “That’s not a nice way to say thank you.”

If your frown couldn’t get any deeper then somehow it found a way. Your throat tightening up like his huge fist was somehow already around you. “What do you mean the ocean? I..drowned didn’t I?” You ignored his other comments. This man didn’t deserve a thank you until you knew what had happened.

“Yes, you fucking did brat. Your fatass fell into the ocean. You ended up here with a fresh set of bandages.”

You barely even registered the insults he was throwing your way. Just swallowing hard as he called you a fatass before wearily speaking once more.“But…how…how did I end up falling into the ocean?” Your voice became a hint softer, frustration bleeding into sadness and maybe even regret.

“Because you’re an idiot that's why. You thought the jetty was a walkway and got swallowed up. It's all your fault so don’t blame me.”

Kids' harsh words hit you hard. Eyes daring to prick with tears as you took a minute to just settle into what you had learned. A weak and bandaged hand raked through your hair as you stared at the ground below you. “Shit.”

The two men just watched you work through it. Both of them having a hard time trying to understand why the hell you seemed so sad about it.

What the hell is wrong with this girl?

“Quit being a brat and dwelling in it. You survived and because you survived you get the honor of personally walking off my ship all by yourself like a big girl.” No matter how hard Kid tried he couldn’t strain himself to be any more reassuring than that. It's not like he wanted to be reassuring but you seemed to be an absolute mess in need of a push. A push off his ship that is.

And though Kid was taking a more aggressive approach Killer couldn’t help but notice the turmoil you were in. Walking past Kid and slowly approaching you with as much benign energy as he could. “Are you okay?”

You looked horrible. Face still a shade paler and your eyes glossed over somewhat. The clothes they had given you stuck to your skin with sweat. Your body swayed even more as if you were caught in a much stronger current than the one currently rocking at the boat.

His voice barely reached your ears. Those same memories, visions, and blood-curdling screams drowning you out. The warm fire on your skin. The ice-cold water in your blood. You tried not to pay attention to it. Eyelashes fluttered closed as you rubbed over your eyes. The darkness did little to help you as you stumbled backward.

Something took hold of Kid's heels as he walked closer to you. Stepping past Killer to land just a few feet in front of you. His chin tilted down to leer at you though his eyes couldn’t help but wander. Trying to pierce through the strange weak form of a woman you had become.

“What’s wrong? You’re fine. It can’t hurt that bad if you’re walking.” He spoke, his voice a bit quieter yet still just as harsh.

What the hell is she doing? Faking this shit for sympathy? Nothing bad is happening.

Hearing Kids' deep voice so close startled you out of your stupor. Your shoulders twitching as you finally slip your hands off your face to look up at him.

Kids eyes widened seeing wet crystal-like tears on the ridges of your eyes. Mouth going slightly agape and eyebrows raising in what you assumed was disgust.

“I’m fine. I can handle the pain. Just get me off this ship.”

Kid was confused to say the least.

Is she crying because she got hurt or because…she doesn’t want to be near me? Because she wishes it wasn’t me that saved her? For some reason that thought made his mind blare red. You’re once helpless figure now cast in something weak and greedy in his mind. A leech on the stray strands of his kindness that he felt like plucking and squishing to death between his fingers.

“Are a few screws loose up there or something? Why the hell are you crying? I let you on my ship that you were drooling over. I used my supplies to bandage you up. I gave you my precious and invaluable attention for more than a few minutes. I even risked my life to save your ass. You should be fucking thankful not crying.”

Killer's mask glided between the two of you. Your face scrunched up in confusion as your lips parted to speak. But before you could utter a single word he piped up. “Kid, what are you doing? I told you I could handle this.” Both you and Kid looked over at him like you had forgotten he was even there. A deep scowl turning more rich with wrath as Kid eyed Killer.

“I’m doing what I fucking want to. I told you I didn’t need your help.” Kid stormed closer, forehead laced with lines as he kept breaching the gap between you and him.

You couldn’t help but look at Kid with even more confusion. Phasing past his words speaking of your ungrateful self to focus on one part that didn’t quite make sense. “Wait did you just say you...saved me? Were you the one that found me?” Wiping your tears with the back of your hand in a quick motion you took a tiny step closer to the man. Not at all afraid of that look of wrath he seemed to be fostering in his eyes.

It was Kid's turn to feel a spike of panic as his cheeks daringly went a shade red. “N-No I didn’t save you! You’re a fucking idiot to assume I’d save someone as worthless as you. I would let you drown without a thought so don’t get me wrong and quit avoiding the question. What the hell is wrong with you?”

Despite the obvious turmoil you were feeling, another round of anger splashed into the cesspool of your mind. “Nothing is wrong with me! I’m fine. I just don’t like being on ships. I need to get the fuck off this thing like right now.” You looked away from Kid, shuffling towards the nearest banister parallel to the dock.

With one brutal step Kid bounded towards you once again. Spit flying past his red-painted lips as he spoke. “What do you mean you don’t like being on ships? Are you seasick or something? My boat is barely swaying ya baby.”

“It’s not sea sickness. I just don’t like it okay? Can you quit asking me why and just help me?” You kept just trying to walk away from Kid. Eyes scanning the deck trying to figure out where they kept that plank to walk down on.

Kid paused as he watched you. Your short fluffy head whisked in the wind as you helplessly looked around for a way off.

Is this girl always a helpless little puppy?

“Well, I’m not helping you until you thank me. So get off this boat yourself or fucking fall off I don’t care.”

“Kid don’t you want her gone?” Killer whispered huskily. Of course, it caught your ears though. Turning your head briskly to look between the two men as they exchanged sideways glances.

“What I want is a thank you from her but she’s too much of a brat to cough it up.” Kid laid it on real thick as he spoke. Taking the time to pronounce brat harshly as if his tongue was dripping with venom.

You swiveled your head back towards Kids. Sharp teeth coming into sight as you snarled at him. “Can you stop patronizing me? Quit acting like you're the better person here or that I owe you anything.”

“You do owe me something! A goddamn thank you and maybe an apology while you’re at it. Do you think you deserve to be on my ship? Do you think I wanted to deal with you? I’ve been putting up with you the moment I came ashore instead of fucking relaxing like I was supposed to!”

“How is that my fault?! You never had to talk to me at the bar. You never had to save me or whatever you and your crew did. I was just there doing what I wanted to and you made it your problem. So boo-hoo bitch you fucked up your vacation!” You flung your arms in the air and brashly pointed at him. Quickly turning around and stomping towards the banister in a rush. You gripped its wooden edge, leaning down to look at the fear-inducing height between you and the dock.

Kid couldn't believe what he had heard. Well, he could believe the name-calling and the crass tone in your voice. And though those things made him want to boil over it also made him want to disappear. You were right. He did inherently inject himself into all of your problems. He put himself into the line of fire that was you. And though he knew this deep down it wasn’t going to stop him from telling himself that it was a lie. That you were the villain plotting nefarious plans to make his life a living hell. That the moment you were finally gone maybe things would start going his way. Even so, he didn’t exactly understand why he wasn’t just escorting you off his ship if that was the case.

My life would be easier with her gone. So why do I need this? Why am I keeping her here? She means nothing to me.

That thought crossed his mind just to turn his cheeks red. His knuckles were white as he wiped off the small layer of sweat across his brow. He could feel his stump twitching with a pulse. The new bandages doing little to hide the fiery sensation pinching at his nerves.

That’s it. I’m ripping her fucking head off. He watched you with keen eyes. Not willing to speak in case he let something slip that was beyond him. Beyond what he was willing to admit.

Killer cautiously stepped closer to Kid with pleading yet gentle steps. “Hey, I can handle this. Go inside. She’s being a bitch I realize but you're in no shape to-”

“To do what? Kill this bitch? Let me handle it Kil. She’s my problem.” Kid roared, your head jerking backward to watch the two men. With yet another string of panicked actions, you tried to sling your foot over the banister. A ripping pain snapping through you as it pinched the injury on your side.

If there is a God can they just give me a break and let me get off this damn thing!

With quick succession, you tried to jump onto the banister once more. Hooking one foot over quickly and bouncing up to sit on the carved railing. Your ass slammed against the ridged wood making you grunt and lean over in pain. Hanging one leg off the side of the boat as you looked down to sea the line between dock and saltwater below you.

“What the fuck are you doing? Do you want to fall off?” Kid couldn't believe how stupid you were. Your round body hanging off the edge into what could be yet another nose dive into the ocean. “Are you trying to drown again because believe me sweetheart I can make that happen.” He growled walking towards you.

That look on his face spoke a million words and all of them screamed murder. But in the other direction was of course a one-story drop that made piss nearly trickle down your legs.

SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT.

“Okay okay! I’m sorry! I said I’m fucking sorry so stop!”

This wasn’t your proudest moment but it was one you hoped to walk away from with all your limbs intact. Despite your pleas, Kid didn’t come to a stop. Still barreling towards you as if he hadn’t heard a thing. You tried to shuffle off the banister but he was already right up on you. Watching with shadowed eyes as he leaned uncomfortably close. His face was a mere foot away as his one arm grabbed onto the railing to close you in.

“I don’t know. That didn’t sound very genuine to me. How about you try again?” The intensity of his voice was suffocating you. His mountain of a body caging you in and his face far too close for comfort.

You could nearly feel his breath fan across you as your cheeks slowly blossomed a deep red. Trembling lips followed by a quiet voice to match your submission. “I’m sorry for bothering you and being a nuisance.” You swallowed hard, dryness tearing at your already sore throat. If your blood was cold before it had gone even colder.

Kid's eyes flickered between yours. Soaking in that look of fear and desperation running across your face. It was palpable to the point where he could taste it on his tongue. Sweet and sour like the softness of your voice but the bitterness in your eyes.

Finally, the kind of reaction I deserve. He thought without a word. The silence between the two of you was so raw with tension. Egging on your fear even more. “And what else do we say? Don’t make me push you off so be a good girl and just say it.”

Confusion flashed through you. Blinking back and forth between his amber orbs. “What?” Your voice was so soft Kid could barely hear it. Cheeks going aflame as you leaned off to one side trying to get away from him. But as soon as you did that the boat tipped. A wave rocking along with you and your pants providing little friction to keep you upright. You tried to squeeze with your thighs but they slipped along with your hands. “K-Kid help!” You yelped, your body slipping right off the banister towards the waters below.

Kids eyes widened watching this all unfold right in front of him. He didn’t make a move to help you right away but as soon as your body dipped too far off and your legs unhooked from the banister he reached out. Taking hold of your forearm with a vice-like grip. “F-Fucking hell.” He let out a deep grunt. Abs leaning over and onto the railing to reach you. Your once-falling body now slack against the side of the hull. A wretched yell of pain escaped you as your injuries spasmed.

“Ahh fuckin shit K-Kid help me up!” Your other hand grasped onto Kid's forearm. Feet trying to kick upwards to propel you more.

“You’re not fucking light ya know!” He inhaled deeply through his teeth. His jaw clenched tight as he struggled to keep ahold of you. You’re soft arm slipping in his sweaty hand.

“Captain?”

Kids' eyes break away from your lingering stare up at him. Finally noticing the contents of the dock below. A line of his crewmates were standing idly watching the two of you. A few baskets and crates in hand as if they had paused mid-step to spot the two of you.

Kid didn’t know what to say. Almost forsaking you as his arm naturally went limp. “Kid!!” His body flinched back into life when he heard your voice again. Muscles contracting once more to reapply pressure before you slipped out of his grasp.

You didn’t dare look down at the crowd below you. Eyes focused on Kid and the fast approaching footsteps of what you assumed was Killer not too far behind. But Kid's eyes weren’t on you. Dare say they had paused in one particular spot further down the dock towards the island. Once wide and glossy with embarrassment now honed and focused on something else.

“Who is that?” Kids voice was low and quiet. Pulling you up towards him with a breathy grunt. Killer finally took up the space beside Kid. Grabbing onto your other arm and effectively sliding you over the banister like a towel.

Sliding onto the deck your head almost slammed right into Kid's chest. Killer quickly let go of your arm. Grabbing you by the shoulder to steady you until you stayed upright.

“Y/N?” a voice called. With wobbly knees and blushing cheeks, you held tightly onto Kid's arm for support. Your breath hitching in the realization of who Kid was asking about. Slowly and unsurely you turned your head towards the source of the voice, only to find the worst-case scenario just standing there.

“H-Hi Dad.”

A/N: Okay okay okay I realize that I’m making Y/N like EXTREMELY clumsy for no reason. It’s apart of her character yes but I promise she isn’t always the classic clumsy girl in need of saving trope!! Things will change. She will get better. She’s just GOING THROUGH IT right now. I mean like drowning, then on boat you don’t know, to fear for lore reasons, to angry man threatening you, to almost dying again!! Like it’s BAD BAD for her rn. ALSO I hope ya’ll are concocting some sweet ideas y/ns past lol. I feel like I’m making it too apparent but I’m also not sure??? There’s a lot to unpack there.

#one piece #one piece eustass #eustass kid #eustasscaptainkid #killer one piece #kid pirates #one piece x reader #x reader #eustass kid x reader #massacre soldier killer #eustass kid x y/n #eustass kid x you

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anama-cara · 4 months

Text

The Healer: Bargaining finale (part 5/5)

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4. Joel Masterlist

Raider!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Summary: You finally reach the doctor's house with Joel and your sick little brother and you show Joel your appreciation. Reader's thoughts in italics. Word count: 2.7k

Warnings: 18+ mdni, sickness/fever, age gap, unprotected PIV

a/n: I wasn't sure how to end this. At first I had a much darker ending but I decided that I liked these characters too much so I added some *feelings*. Please let me know what you think

You had awoken to the sounds of birds chirping and soft breathing. Joel’s arm was draped over your waist and his hand rested on your stomach. It was pleasantly warm. In your mind you pretended that you were sleeping next to someone who actually cared. You imagined it was real. That you could have a companion that loved and protected you, that you could wake up like this next to them in the mornings. It was a nice daydream, but just that. That kind of dream didn’t exist in this new world, nothing good survived. And you certainly had no hope of finding a good man like that to love you.

Joel’s arm twitched in his sleep and you were pulled from your daydream and into your memories from the night before. How his lips felt on your neck, how his hands felt on your body, how his voice sounded as he said your name, how his fingers felt inside you.

For a moment you keep your eyes closed to the world and sink into the comforting feeling. Listening to the songbirds, letting the first rays of sunlight filtering through the tree dance over your closed lids, feeling Joel’s chest rise and fall against your back. You draink it all in, you hadn’t experienced a moment this peaceful in a long time.

There’s a rustle from the sleeping bag across the fire and you jump. Shit. What are you thinking?

You remind yourself that this is Joel, the leader of the band of raiders that terrorizes your countryside. He is not a good man, even if he is helping you, which he really isn’t, this is on just his way. Suddenly you feel shame, you can’t believe that you let him make you cum, let him hold you, sleep beside you. You curse yourself for being so foolish and letting yourself go last night.

Sleeping beside a fucking criminal, a bully, a killer. A fucking menace. What the hell were you thinking?

You wriggle out of the bag and jump to your feet. To your relief your little brother just rolls over, still sounds asleep. You let out a breath.

“Scared of getting caught?” Joel’s voice is rough with sleep but you can hear the smile on his lips.

“Come on get up,” you kick him in his sleeping bag. “The sun is up we gotta go.”

“Ok bossy,” he grumbles as he rubs his palms over his eyes with an exaggerated yawn.

You wake up your brother as Joel packs up the camp and you’re heading out for the last leg of your journey before the sun is fully risen.

---

You’d been diligently following a few yards behind Joel, carrying your brother in your arms. He seems to get weaker with every step. In the last mile he doesn’t even respond to you when you call his name. He’s just limp in your arms and you can feel his fever burning through his clothing. You make a desperate sound as you try to shake him awake.

Joel’s head whips back. “What’s wrong?” He turns and retreats back to you.

“He won’t wake up,” your voice trembles as you’re trying not to panic. You hold back the tears that threaten to brim over.

“Jesus sweetheart why didn’t you say somethin.” He moves to take the boy from your arms but your grip tightens.

“What are you doing?” There’s fear in your accusation.

His eyes rack over your face, reading your expression. “You don’t trust me,” he says flatly but his expression almost looks hurt. He takes a breath and a hard expression returns to his face. “We gotta move a whole lot faster. If you don’t want him to die we gotta get to the house and get this fever to break.” Joel takes your brother from your arms and you don’t fight him this time. He takes off in a jog and you run after him, trying to keep up.

The house looks similar to yours, farmhouse style with a big front porch. Its white paint is peeling and there are a few cracked windows on the top floor but in all its still in good condition. As you come up the dirt drive you see a thin man in his late 60s watching from the window. After he sees the boy Joel is carrying, he disappears from the window only to reappear in the doorway. He sets his rifle down on the table and comes out onto the porch to meet you.

“Joel,” the man gives a stiff nod in greeting. His eyes dart to you then back to Joel.

“Doc,” Joel gives a nod. There’s respect but no friendliness there. Joel dips his head in your direction, “This here’s one of your neighbors, and this is her little brother. He’s got a bad fever and needs your help.” The doctor narrows his eyes at you and Joel, but when he looks down at the child in Joel’s arms his expression softens. “Of course, bring him in.”

You follow the him inside and Joel sets the boy down on the couch. The old man looks at you, “I’ll require a payment of course. What supplies have you brought to offer?”

“What I don’t, I-“ you stammer in a panic but Joel interrupts you.

“You and I will discuss payment later. You help him first.”

The man’s gaze shifts from you to Joel, he pauses a moment then nods in agreement. “Very well. But if he needs antibiotics the price will be doubled. Upstairs.”

Joel carries your brother upstairs and sets him in the bathtub. “Out,” the doc instructs him then turns to you. “You, undress him and fill the bath. Lukewarm. We’ll try to bring his temperature down. I’ll go get him a glass of water, we need to keep him well hydrated.” You tend to your brother for hour before the fever finally breaks. You help dress him and carry him to a bed in one of the guest bedrooms on the top floor. You go to sit beside him but the doc shoos you from the room. “No, he needs rest, out, out.” Exhausted you return downstairs and plop down onto the couch.

You must have been drifting off because you’re startled when the cushion sinks as a weight sits down next to you.

“Doc is gonna give him some medicine, says he’s got pneumonia. You didn’t hear him coughing?”

You blink, quickly trying to gather your thoughts. “Umm, yeah, I did, I just thought it was part of a cold, you know cause its winter, I mean he always starts coughing when it gets colder. I didn’t think much of it, I was just thinking of his fever. I should have paid more attention.” Your voice tightens.

“No, sweetheart that’s not what I meant,” he trails of looking frustrated then leans back into the couch. “Doesn’t matter, it’s gonna be fine, he’ll get better now.”

“Joel, how much did he ask for? He said the medicines were expensive.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“But-“

“I said don’t worry about it. I took care of it.”

You swallow, “thank you.”

His head turns to look at you, and eyebrow raised in surprise.

Tentatively you reach out and lay a hand on top of his, trying to express your appreciation. “I’m serious Joel. Thank you.”

The corner of his mouth twitches and he turns to face forward again. He lets out a sigh and leans his head back into the couch, closing his eyes and casually relaxing. You’ve never seen him like this. “Doc also said the boy needs rest so we’re gonna stay the night and leave tomorrow. Said we can sleep upstairs in the other guest room down the hall. I think he likes ya’ never seen him so generous before.”

You blink. We? “What about your mission? I thought you were supposed to meet up with your men today for a job?”

He shrugged nonchalantly. “They’ll assume I got held up. They can do it without me.”

“Joel if you need to leave-“

He opens one eye to look at you. “There’s no place I’d rather be right now sweetheart.”

You swallow and gather some courage. “Joel,” you say hesitantly. “Why are you helping me? Why tell us about the doctor, why escort us, why pay for the medicine, why be… nice to me?”

He turns to face you fully now, his hand strokes your cheek then returns to grip your hand. You instinctively tense and go to pull your hand away but you stop as his eyes lock on yours. “Don’t you get it sweetheart?”

“What?” you reply a bit breathlessly. His eyes are making you nervous.

“I care for ya.”

You feel your heartbeat quicken and you’re silent for a moment as you let his words sink in. What the fuck?

“I know, I’m sorry for how we first met, I shouldn’ta done that, but-“

“Y-you care for me?” You can barely get the words out.

Joel shakes his head. “I shouldn’ta said nothin.” He moves his hand from yours. “No, wait-“ you reach out and grip his retreating hand. Why are you holding his hand? Why is your heart aching? Why do you want him to stay?

But despite the thoughts running through your head your body is acting. You shift closer to him and your hand that reached out to hold his is now slowly moving up his forearm in a gentle caress. Joel closes his eyes for a moment at your touch. You silently urge him to continue.

“Sweetheart I know I fucked up. You were so good to me and I didn’t treat you right. I know I don’t deserve ya.” He is looking into your eyes now, desperation in his eyes. “But I swear I wanna do right by ya. I wanna be there for you, protect you, be with you.”

You don’t break away from his gaze as you move closer still. You’re just inches away from him, almost touching his chest as he stares down at you.

“I want you” he whispers.

And finally you speak the truth that you know is in your heart. “You already have me Joel.”

Your hand glides up his arm and presses against his hard chest as you lean forward to press a gentle kiss to his lips. It’s tender and sweet and like nothing either thought you’d ever experience again in this fucked up world.

You lift your body from the couch to move fully into his lap now, straddling him. Your hands wrap around his face and you lean into him, deepening the kiss and pushing him back against the couch. His hands grip at your hips and you can feel his bulge underneath you. Instinctually you rock your hips into him and he groans in your mouth. You break the kiss and nip at his neck before sliding out of his lap and onto the floor between his feet. You kneel between his legs and look up at him, one hand rubbing circles over his knee. He’s looking down at you, slumped in the couch. You smirk as you watch his tummy rise and fall with each heavy breath. He spreads his legs more and you shuffle closer to him on your knees.

A wicked smile curves on his lips, “You gonna show me just how grateful you are now? This how ya thank me?”

You nod vigorously and reach out for his belt just as you hear the floor creak upstairs. You jump up and throw yourself onto the couch, lounge back and trying to act casual. Joel lets out a barking laugh at the panic in your eyes. “I didn’t know anyone could move that fast sweetheart,” he laughs as he pats your knee. Your heart is beating fast, you completely forgot there was someone else in this house. You were about to suck Joel off in the middle of someone else’s living room while they were just a few rooms away and could walk in at any moment.

Joel smirks and grabs your hand, pulling you up. “Come on.” He leads you up the stairs and down the hall to the guest bedroom. “Goodnight doc, see you tomorrow,” he calls out loudly then winks at you as he shuts the door and pulls you towards the bed.

He pushes you down with his hands on your shoulders. He stands before you, tall and strong, dark eyes looking down at you and you feel yourself start to get wet. He reaches for his back and grabs his flannel, pulling it off over his head. Quickly he undoes his belt and drops his boxers and jeans in one go. He steps out of his pants and stands before you, completely naked, looking like a freaking god. You’ve never seen his body before, usually he tells you to strip and he remains fully clothed. This new imbalance has your blood pumping and your core clenching. You gulp as he closes the gap between you and scoops his hands under your arms to lift you and push you all the way up onto the bed. He lays over your body, face just a few inches above yours, dark eyes scanning yours. His hand reaches down between you to undo your pants and he pulls back for just a moment to pull your pants and underwear from your body. You take this opportunity to quickly shed your shirt before he’s back over your again. He rests on his elbows and his hands come up to cradle your face, fingers intertwining in your hair as his lips crash into yours, desperate and needy and hot. You whimper against him and he pulls back after a moment.

“Joel I need you, now.”

“Sweetheart I don’t wanna hurt you again. Lemme help stretch you first, get ya ready to take me.” His hand reaches down, trailing over your skin as he moves down your body.

“Joel, I’m ready now.”

His hand moves between your legs and he grins as his fingers reach your wetness. He rubs against your clit with two fingers. “Yeah you are. So wet for me already, fuck.” He plants a kiss to your neck, sucking at your soft skin as his other hands wraps around his cock and guides it to your entrance. You suck in a breath, tensing as you brace for the pain and the stretch, used to Joel shoving into you. But this time he doesn’t. He takes his time, slowly pushing into you inch by inch, letting your body adjust. He groans, fully inside you and you can’t help looking down between you. You watch as he moves his hips and slides in and out of you easily. He catches you staring and smirks, “like that? Want it faster sweetheart?” You nod, unable to speak, and he jerks his hips, hitting something deep inside you causing your head to fall back into the pillows. Your back arches as he sets his new pace and you groan. It doesn’t take long for you to feel your orgasm building. Your hands are gripping the sheets and you’re shaking your head and moaning as it takes over you. Your body spasms under Joel’s and he holds you down with his forearm across your chest. “Fucking bronco, hang on sweetheart I’m almost there.” He continues thrusting into you as you come down from your high and after a few more deep movements he’s spilling inside you, warmth spreading through your core. His breathing is ragged and he collapses on top of you, bodies flush against each other. He tucks you in his arms then rolls both of you to the side so he’s lying behind you, cradling you in his arms.

He kisses your hair from behind. “So fucking good.” He murmurs.

You lay together like that for a long time until your both starting to drift off.

“Joel, I-, I”

“I know sweetheart, everything will be just fine now.”

You smile to yourself as you drift off, comforted by the idea that for the first time since the world fell apart you think the next day will be a better one.

#dark!joel miller x reader #raider!joel #tlou fanfiction #joel miller smut #joel miller the last of us #joel x reader smut #joel miller #raider x f!reader #raider!joelmiller #raider joel miller #raider joel #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x female reader #post outbreak joel #joel miller angst #joel x you #joel x reader

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miamochi-writes · 1 year

Note

Hey there! I saw your most recent posts and I love how you write! Could I get a request of a sleep deprived reader who stays awake after being ambushed by cops or bandits. And maybe Vash convinces them to rest after seeing how tired they are? Maybe sprinkle a bit of fluff? x

Zero O' Clock

A/n: oooo I dig this. Also I have been sleep deprived for a couple of days so this hits too close to home :'). I'm always up to write for this ray of sunshine. Plus, we all know this man would do anything to make sure you get the proper rest you need. Happy reading!

For the past several nights, you haven't gotten the best of sleep. Your eyes were starting to dry quickly and not adjust to the sunlight. Your body felt lethargic and a bit tingly every now and then from the lack of sleep. Your usual happy and cheery self was replaced with an irritable mood that even Wolfwood knew not to provoke you. You've been like this ever since the group was ambushed multiple times at night.

You were sleeping underneath the dark vast sky of the desert on top of the sand dunes. Like Vash, you were a light sleeper but you could easily fall asleep after making yourself comfortable. So right when you were about to drift off, you heard multiple foot steps running towards your camping site. Your eyes were wide open from hearing the sound as you got up. You and Vash spotted a group of bandits heading your way. You scrambled to wake the others as Vash and Wolfwood were trying to slow them down with their weapons. Eventually, the whole gang managed to clumsily pile into Meryl's car and as she stepped on the gas pedal. You thought that would be the end of it, but you were horribly wrong.

Two days after that incident, you were getting cozy with your sleeping bag after eating a hearty meal. Right when you dozed off, you only got to enjoy maybe 5 minutes of peace before Vash woke you up as you heard yelling from afar. This time it was bounty hunters closing in on the group with their fleet of Thomas. And so the cycle repeated itself once more as everyone had to wake up and make another getaway. All it took were those two ambushes to shake you to your core. Your mind and body were on edge no matter how much you wanted to sleep. The most you could do was close your eyes and just pass the time until sunrise. While your group was able to go back to their usual sleeping routines, your adrenaline and paranoia grew more each night.

Eventually, Meryl spotted a city nearby with a hotel and managed to get everyone rooms. You thought this would help you with your sleep predicament but to no avail. Another sleepless night of trying to close your eyes. You only managed to look at the ceiling or stare at your window with the moonlight shining. Once the sun's rays landed on your face, you sighed. You tried to look presentable before making your way to the lobby and grabbing something to eat. When you went downstairs you saw Vash was already sitting at one of the tables with his breakfast and another plate next to him. The blonde then noticed your presence as he waved at you.

"Good morning Y/n! I got you a plate!" he greeted as you couldn't help but smile at him. He constantly thinks about others and goes the extra mile what being told. His benevolent and cheery self always made you have faith in humanity once more when things seem bleak. Vash just had a natural charm that drew people to him, including you.

"Morning to you too Vash. I appreciate how thoughtful you are. Are the others joining us?" you asked as you took a seat next to him. It was moments like this you learned to appreciate Vash's company. It wasn't every day you get to enjoy moments like this with him where you can be comfortable and enjoy a meal together.

"Meryl and Roberto are out getting fuel for the car. Wolfwood is out and about probably getting some of his usual items. So it's just us here," he explained as you took a bite of your food and looked at him. So you were one of the lasts to wake up. Once he was done talking, he went to go put away his plate and came back to his seat.

"So what about you, what are your plans?" he asked giving you his full attention.

"I figured I'd grab a couple of things in town or see if anyone needs help before we head out to our next destination. What about you? I thought you'd be helping one of the townspeople by now," you spoke. You didn't want to be a burden, especially with moody you were with Roberto and Wolfwood. You didn't mean to, and thought you would make it up to them somehow.

"Yeah about that, something else came up," Vash vaguely answered as you cocked an eyebrow at him. Vash having a higher priority that was more important than helping civilians? You wondered what he was up to as you managed to finish eating.

"Oh, and what would that be?" you asked staring at him. You then saw his glasses hide his eyes with those oranges reflective shades. You got a glimpse of your reflection and felt a bit unnerved. Anytime his glasses did that, you knew the blonde was up to something.

"Y/n, how have you been feeling lately?" he asked as he slightly scooted closer to you. You were slightly caught off guard as you bit your lip.

"I'm peachy as ever, why?" you asked trying to convince him with your tone. You were catching on to his question, and the last thing you wanted to do was make him worry about you. He already carried a large burden on his shoulders, the last thing you wanted was to add to that burden. Vash's eyebrows furrowed as you were starting to grow tense from how close he was to you.

"Y/n, you don't have to pretend with me. I noticed you've been acting different with the others. You've also been quiet the past couple of days. I don't know what's going on, but you can talk to me. I just want to know if you're okay," Vash replied as you looked away. So he noticed your behavior too. You felt guilty that you made him worry. You debated on how to answer him as you bit your lip once more. You snuck a glance at him once more and you saw his blue eyes staring right at your e/c eyes. His eyes were filled with concern, yet he showed a small sad smile. It was almost as if he looked like he was giving you the puppy face which pulled your heart strings.

"Okay, fine I'll tell you. I'm not okay. I've been having a hard time sleeping lately. It's why I've been a little irritable and distant lately. I've been trying to sleep but nothing works. Doesn't matter if I sleep early, take a hot shower, or have a heavy meal, I keep staying up late," you caved in. Vash listened and rested his chin on the palm of his hands. He let you talk as he listened, but you could tell his worried expression grew.

"When did you first start having trouble sleeping?" Vash questioned. You told him how you first noticed since the ambushes started. It was specifically after the second one was when you were up all night. You also mentioned how you didn't want to burden anyone with your problems since they were nothing compared to what everyone else was facing.

"Y/n, you mean to tell me it's been going on ever since that day?" he asked once more as you sheepishly nodded.

"Were you able to sleep last night?" he continued as you shook your head.

"Are you nervous that it's going to happen again?" he asked.

"I don't know, maybe," you said as you wondered too. Vash looked deep in thought as you stared at him feeling vulnerable with the man you adored. Then Vash looked at you and put his human hand over yours as this small gesture caught you completely off guard with your heart racing.

"Well that settles it, you're going to sleep in for the day," he chimed as you looked at him with complete shock. Before you could say anything, he grabbed your hand and led you back to your room. You couldn't get over how warm his hand was as your face was flustered. Sure you've brushed shoulders briefly with him, but him holding your hand for this long? Were you hallucinating from the lack of sleep?

He managed to get a hold of your room key and led you inside before he closed the door behind him.

"You really want me to sleep in? I feel bad Vash," you told him as he sighed.

"Y/n, you haven't slept in days. Besides, you can't help others if you're not helping yourself first. I know the others will understand," he pointed out as you gave in. You knew he was right as you made your way to your bed and laid down. Vash walked up to you and flashed you a quick smile as you hid your face under the covers.

"Now rest up, and don't even think about sneaking out. I'll be guarding the door," he warned as you pouted. He knew you too well. What shook you more was that he was pulling up a chair next to the bed as you felt your cheeks and ears turning red.

"Vash, what are you doing?" you asked him.

"Making sure you don't escape and actually go to sleep," he answered like it was no big deal.

"Y-you're really going to stay here with me while I try to sleep?" you asked once more as you emphasized the sleep part. You needed to be sure as he nodded his head with no hesitation. You heart rate was becoming erratic as your mind was racing.

"I think maybe you've been having trouble sleeping since you feel like you're expecting something to happen like the ambushes. I figured maybe you'd relax if you knew someone was here to watch over you while you sleep. It could help remove the stress," Vash explained as you gave it some thought. At this point, you were running out of options and you were willing to try anything at this point.

"Hey Vash, why are you doing all of this for me? You could be helping others like you usually do when we're at different cities," you asked out of curiosity.

"Well it's because I care about you. You're important to me and the group. The last thing I want is for something to happen to you when we're out traveling," he explained. Thankfully the blanket was covering part of your face as your blush grew a deeper color. Vash really made you feel all sorts of things. Your mind kept replaying his answer as you tried to get comfortable.

"Thanks Vash, I appreciate you doing this," you commented as you tried to focus on sleeping.

"Of course, I'm always happy to help. If something ever bothers you, know that I'm here Y/n," he reassured as you gave him a small smile. As you closed your eyes, you heard Vash humming a song. It was a beautiful melody that was ever so soothing. You turned your head towards Vash again and opened your eyes. You knew Vash had an alluring voice, but for him to carry a tune? He continued to surprise you more and more each day.

"What song is that?" you asked him as he perked up.

"It's something I used to sing to myself whenever I got scared or anxious. It always helps calm me down. I'm sorry, is it bothering you?" he spoke as you shook your head.

"No, I like it. It's a beautiful melody," you answered with a slight yawn. It was harder to keep your eyes open the more Vash kept humming. Your breathing was finally slowing as you hadn't felt this relaxed in awhile.

"Sleep well Y/n, I'll be right here," Vash commented as you dozed off with a smile. He continued to quietly sing until he was sure you were fast asleep. After 30 minutes, Vash went up to you and adjusted the covers as he saw you shiver a bit. He then gave a quick kiss to your head and sat back down as he watched fondly over you. It wasn’t until later on he decided to doze off for the day.

Bonus:

Wolfwood was looking around for you and Vash as he noticed how quiet it was around town. Usually there would be some commotion going off right now. It wasn’t until he saw a glimpse of Vash dragging you into your room and then putting the “Do not Disturb” sign out the door.

“Well, that wasn’t on my bingo card. But good for them,” Wolfwood whistled to himself with a smirk.

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