#i genuinely think this game is absolutely beautiful vanilla
Text
i died in here half a dozen times. and then i left. impressed?
#skyrim#should i try sniping everyone from the ledge?#idk i will come back later#i genuinely think this game is absolutely beautiful vanilla#with a few shaders its soft and it does it for me#tes v skyrim
103 notes
·
View notes
Text
Excessive Force : Tom Ludlow x Fem Nurse Reader (COLLAB W/ THE INCREDIBLE @johnwickb1tsch) - Chapter One Two Three Four Five Six
TW: violence, choking, mentions of bdsm, abuse of authority, cops, unfair power dynamics, harassment, body fluids and drug use mentions, mentions of harm/accidents
For California, it’s a bit chilly out this morning. The sun is getting a lazy late start, just beginning to yawn golden orange and fiery yellow over the horizon. Julian’s hair in that light is the high shine of fashion magazine model locs, and you’re, as usual, opening your mouth before you think. “What shampoo and conditioner do you use?”
He seems thoroughly amused. “Honestly? You’re going to be mad about it.”
“Try me,” you prod, slipping inside his little sports car that smells like lemon air freshener and coffee.
He seems a little cramped in the seat, knees bent up and head almost touching the ceiling, and you wonder if he actually even tried to get into this thing before buying it.
“It’s a rental,” he explains.
“Did you get into an accident?”
“A truck hit mine while it was parked.”
“How are you so calm about that? I’d punch someone.”
He looks over at you with a sculpted, raised brow. “I just cannot imagine you hurting a fly, y/n.”
“Flies are innocent, truck drivers are free game.”
He gives you a big laugh that strokes the flame of your ego. “You’re hilarious. I use men’s body wash.”
“What?” Okay, he’s right, you are a little mad. You use shampoo and conditioner that are specifically supposed to soften your hair, but the poof on your head absolutely pales in comparison to his soft, beautiful mane that gets the luxury of … what? Old spice? Axe body wash?
“I told you,” he sings, turning on the engine.
Genetics is a bitch.
He takes you to a fancy little French inspired coffee shop cuddled into the center of an outlet mall with salt lamps and big ferns and comfy chairs. You settle into a nook closests to the sunned windows so Julian can keep an eye on his rental, which is understandable. No part of LA is good to have a Porsche in, but especially not the inner city.
“This is delicious,” you tell him through a mouthful of warm croissant, covering your lips in embarrassment when you realize that your table manners are less than adequately prepared for a date with a doctor.
“They have the best coffee,” he agrees, taking a sip of his steaming latte.
You don’t have time to stop your brain from comparing Julian to a certain cop you know who prefers his coffee black and bitter, or at least that’s what he told you when he saw you drinking your vanilla cream cold foam at the nurse’s station.
Julian is talking, you think, and you’re only half listening while you remember how Tom had snatched that drink right out of your hands and held it up in the air.
“Give it back!” You hissed, reaching up on tiptoes while he laughed at the pathetic rescue attempt.
“Careful, honey, don’t hurt yourself for this pathetic excuse of caffeine. What is it anyway? Is there even coffee in here?”
After he walked away with his discharge paperwork, your coworkers were understandably curious about the tall, puckish cop who fucked with you any chance he got.
Miguel watched his ass move the whole way down the hallway and out the glass exit doors while literally clutching the rosary under his scrub shirt as if a devil had just walked by, then looked over at you. “What a man.”
“Are you alright?” Julian asks, bringing you back to the present conversation with a hand over your forearm. He does seem concerned, and it makes you feel like a piece of shit. This guy is a gentleman and here you are on a date with him fantasizing about the brute that is Tom Ludlow.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” You wave away his concern. “Tell me about you, Julian. What do you do for fun? Doctor-by-night, Violin-player-by-morning?
He chuckles. “Nothing that cultured. I like riding motorcycles.”
“Really?” You ask, genuinely surprised and trying to imagine Julian in a gang of bikers with cracked leather skull and snake jackets.
“I love them.” He nods. “I have three that I take for long rides along the coast. You get lost in it, the wind and salt and sand. The rumble of the engine under you.”
“I’ve never been on one,” you tell him, “and I’m honestly surprised you ride them after what we see in the ER. Don’t you remember that guy that had his calf hanging on by a tendon? Or that woman who had half her face missing?”
“Yes, I do. But I go the speed limit and wear the proper gear. And I like the thrill.”
It’s not just the casual t-shirt and worn jeans or the way the light halos his thick silk nest of hair or the roguish grin that makes you see Julian in an entirely new way, now. “You’re wild, Dr. Mercer.”
He licks spilled cream at the ridge of his coffee cup, rubs at the skin of your forearm with his fingers, and winks. You wonder what he would look like between your legs doing the same thing, except with your fingers gripping that luscious hair.
“You should let me take you for a ride, sometime,” he suggests, and for a minute you forget you’re talking about motorcycles.
“Oh, I don’t know, Julian.”
“C’mon.” He nudges your knee under the table and relaxes back into his seat, now reminding you too much of someone else you know. Same height, same hair color, same facial structure.
Fuck. Really?
“Good boyfriends take their girlfriends on long, romantic motorcycle rides.”
“But you’re not my boyfriend.”
His smile droops a little bit and it makes you feel bad for being so illiterately ignorant. Well, you feel bad until he opens his mouth. “I am, though.”
He paints it playful, but it sounds a little bit pushy-bossy, even. “I don’t know about that, either, Julian.”
He tries a different angle. “You know, believe it or not, most women would consider me quite the catch.”
You hope your face doesn’t betray the little bit of ick you get from him saying something so egotistical. “I don’t doubt it, and you deserve someone that can give you what you’re looking for.”
“You think you can’t give me what I’m looking for?” He leans across the table in sudden intensity, and you balk at the notion.
“No, I honestly don’t.”
“Why?”
You start to say something, but he cuts you off. “And, I really mean why? Why can’t you give me what I’m looking for? Enlighten me.”
“I’m not-I have too much baggage.” You unconsciously lean away from his swelling intensity.
“That’s a little vague.” He frowns.
“I’m not normal, Julian. You seem like you would like normal women.” You cringe at the childish sentiment, but truly have no idea how to get the point across except for basically telling him that you’re a freak with a bad past and worse coping mechanisms. You eat slices of bread for dinner and drink out of the milk carton. Julian probably irons his shirts. This will not work.
“You’re assuming I’m normal?”
“Yes. I guess I am.” You lean back and cross your arms over your chest.
“Well, I’m not. In fact, I’ll prove it to you.” He takes out his wallet, pulls a laminated card from it, and slides it over the table to you.
“What..” It’s a little red card framed in black with big bold letters on the front advertising a BDSM club in the heart of downtown Venice. “What is this?”
“BDSM is bondage, domination-“
“I know what that is,” you interrupt. “I just meant.. You go here?”
“I do.” He nods and takes a drink. “I occasionally engage in scenes.”
You decide that you should coat your suddenly very dry mouth and drink a big gulp of your coffee. “Like with a dominatrix?”
He laughs at you, puts his head in his hand and shakes his head. “No. I prefer to be the dominant one.”
You look at-really, really look at this man for the first time and honestly cannot imagine him taking that role.
He must see the confusion on your face, because his laughter grows. “That’s the usual reaction I get.”
Curiosity killed the cat. Curiosity killed the-you know what, fuck it.
“So, what do you do at the club?”
“A typical play scene, you mean?” How in the hell he can be so casual and relaxed about this you’re not sure. Because you can already feel the cold sweat breaking along your shoulders and neck.
“I guess? Yeah.”
“Well, ideally the woman is tied up in some fashion, and of course there’s a safe word, negotiated limits. Perhaps a punishment scenario with pain play. Are you okay?”
He looks at your table-clutching, white knuckled hands, searches your face, giving you a genuine concerned expression that makes you wonder what actually is going on with you right now. You feel like you're on a tightrope over a ravine of crocodiles and Julian’s on the other end lazily sawing at the rope with dull scissors.
“I’m fine,” you say breathily, suddenly unable to meet his eyes. “Honestly, I’m not sure how I feel about all that.”
His gentle smile is nothing less than kind, though maybe also, a little disappointed. “I get that a lot too.”
“Is that…the only way you enjoy sex?” you ask quietly, leery of the blue-haired old lady just two tables away.
“No,” he seems happy to tell you. “Though it is…the way I enjoy sex most.”
You blink, digesting this with understandable trepidation. He’s basically telling you that it would be impossible to be in a relationship with him without dipping into this eventually. And you…?
Are definitely intrigued, and you’re not really sure why.
“You said you have baggage,” Julien probes cautiously. You can feel him looking at you, but you’re not quite up to eye contact with him yet. You fix your gaze out the window. “Well, I do too. I haven’t had a perfect life. No one does, and I’m not interested in a perfect girlfriend. I like you, y/n.”
You feel your breath go out in an audible whoosh. It actually makes him smile-you feel it like rays of the sun. How can this man be so warm, and yet have such a dark side?
Well, maybe it’s not a dark side, you reason. Maybe it’s just…a thing he likes, and between consenting adults, what’s the harm?
“So…” You can’t help but think about how odd this is, discussing this in this coffee shop filled with mild-mannered caffeine addicts. What you really want to ask, is what happened to him that makes him like this kind of sexual play, but you know it would be too far, and you damn well don’t feel like talking about your own fucked up past. But there is something you do feel you have a right to know. “Is this something you want to do to me?”
Again, he fixes you with that bad boy smirk that gives you chills and utterly ruins your panties. “Since the moment you stood up to me over that patient,” he admits. And maybe that should alarm you, that he wants to tie you up and hurt you for being defiant about something that deserved defiance. It does alarm you, but… It also… It sounds a little thrilling. “In fact-“
Julian and the rest of the world and even your own thoughts disappear when you meet a pair of familiar, sun tinted eyes out the window of the coffee shop. He’s grinning-when is he not grinning at you like he knows what it does to your helpless insides?-and licking his fingers, tearing off a yellow parking ticket to slap it under the windshield of Julian’s rental.
“Uh, Julian-“
“Just let me finish,” Julian insists. His bossy tone irritates you, but Tom brightens the mood by making a jerking off motion towards the doctor, and then winking at you.
You can’t help but laugh. It’s honestly involuntary, the loud wheeze that tears from your chest and makes Julian look outside to see the yellow ticket shining under his wiper as Ludlow’s ass saunters away.
You’re not sure what Julian’s plan is when he storms outside to catch Ludlow by the arm, but you’re definitely following ten strides behind to prevent his untimely death.
“I’m parked legally.” His voice is a menacing growl instead of the smooth honey you’re used to, and yeah, maybe now you can see a little bit of that Dominant Persona he was talking about.
“Not after 9AM,” Tom says, unbothered by Julian’s anger, still grinning like an idiot.
“It’s eight-thirty,” Julian argues, tugging on Tom’s sleeve-that earns him a bent back arm and even the appearance of handcuffs.
“Tom, stop it, fucking really?”
“Sorry, honey, your boyfriend’s going to jail.”
“For what?!” You and Julian both demand at once.
“Putting his pristine fucking hands on what’s mine.” Tom tugs Julian up on his toes and clicks one handcuff into place.
You hope he means his uniform, but you have a feeling he doesn’t.
“That’s way too tight and you know it,” Julian grunts.
“What, someone likes to dish it out but can’t take it? Don’t be a bitch,” Tom muses, grabbing Julian’s other arm and twisting it-not gently-behind his back.
“Tom, you fucking dickhead.”
He looks at you as he’s putting the other cuff on your date. “Oh, I’ll deal with you later.” His grin looks more like a snarl at this point, and you think that Julian could probably take some pretty good Dom pointers from Tom, because your heart is galloping and your clit is pulsing despite the absolute absurdity of the situation. Also-it's a miracle-your sassing mouth has snapped shut.
After Officer Ludlow practically throws Dr. Mercer into the back of his Charger, slamming the door, he turns to you with a smirk and his thumb in his belt. Goddammit, if that fucking look doesn’t go straight to your lady parts.
“Tom…you cannot do this.”
A tow truck has pulled up, and is in process of impounding the sweet little Porsche.
He steps up to you in those big black boots that make him a mile tall.
“You’d be surprised what I can and cannot do, sweetheart.”
“Please.” You hate how desperate you know you sound.
He taps his chin. “Well, I do like the sound of that. But it would be a lot more convincing if you got on your knees and said it.”
“You asshole,” you seethe, even as you can feel the moisture pooling between your legs.
“That kinda language definitely isn’t going to get Doctor Bitch Boy out of my car.”
“What the fuck do you want then?” You know it was a stupid question the moment it flies from your mouth. He’s going to reply with something filthy, and demeaning, and-
“Have dinner with me.”
You’re going to need another tow truck just to get your jaw up off the ground.
“You’re going to get in trouble for this,” you say. “This isn’t harassing a lowly broke-ass nurse. He is going to sue the shit out of you.”
Tom just snorts at that, unimpressed. “Did you know your friend likes to hang out at a BDSM club in Venice Beach? Whips and chains and shit? Bet this asshole has mommy issues from here to Pasadena. Come on, y/n, you don’t need that in your life.”
It almost sounds like he’s…worried about you?
Officer Ludlow has no idea how badly he’s misjudged you, now that he’s pissed you off. “Maybe I like it,” you snipe back, stretching up so you’re almost in his face. “Fact is, it’s none of your fucking business.”
Ludlow just narrows his eyes down at you, those dark orbs glinting like sharp obsidian. “Well, sorry, guess he’s not tying you up tonight, baby. He’s gotta cool down in the tank.”
He makes to go, but you reach out, not grabbing him, per se, but just touching his chest. He freezes, and you can practically feel him vibrating beneath your hand. With excitement, because he fucking lives for being an asshole, or…you hate to think you know the real answer.
His mitt of a hand covers yours, holding it just above his heart.
“Tom….” Caught up in this tension between you, you’re not even sure what you’re asking now.
You expect him to say something dirty, or snide, but instead you swear that just for a moment, his gaze softens as he looks down at you. “Dinner?” he asks again, with a note of hope in his voice that is almost endearing, if he wasn’t being such a class A jerk.
“I can’t.”
His demeanor changes in less than a second, drawing up to his full height, his shoulders squared. He flicks down his sunglasses that were on his head, so you can no longer even see his eyes. His voice changes, drops an octave, something. The authority in it makes you shudder inside. “Wave to Dr. Bitch Boy, y/n, we’re going for a little ride.”
Before you can grab him, or do anything, really, Tom is behind the wheel, speeding off with a very pissed off Julian in the back seat.
Your heart drops to your feet as you are left standing there alone on the sidewalk without a ride, and completely at a loss as to what to do.
***
“I’m going to fucking sue you,” Julian grits, kicking the back of Tom’s seat for good measure.
“Yeah, yeah, with your doctor money,” Tom grumbles, taking a big swig of coffee with one hand and steering recklessly with the other because it’s fun to watch that skinny fuck bounce around helplessly in the seat.
“I’m not getting booked tonight, Officer Ludlow. I’m calling my fucking lawyer.”
“Sorry, Doctor Bitch, your Lawyer’s busy until tomorrow afternoon, didn’t you hear?”
“You son of a-“
Tom gasses the car over a big pothole and it sends Julian flying into the opposite door. It’s a sight he could almost get off to.
Julian, big goose egg swelling up on his temple, gets yanked out of the squad car and tossed on the shit smeared, needle peppered streets of South Central. “They probably need you here more than the hospital, Doctor. Have fun–”
“Wait! Fuck. I’m still cuffed for fuck’s sake!” Tom gives the little guy credit for being able to get up on his feet so fast with his hands behind his back and a probable minor concussion. “You can’t leave me here.”
Tom pauses with his hand on the lip of the hot car door, but only to memorize the sight of a sweat-stained, wild eyed, trembling distinguished doctor about to get his shit wrecked on the mean LA Streets. He’s guessing Julian’s never visited much outside of Hollywood, Venice, and Santa Monica, and the cute little horrified expression on his face is testament to that.
Tom taps the hood of his car. “See ya, Doc.”
“You know,” Julian says, “this isn’t going to stop me from seeing her, Tom.”
Well, if he wants a fight.
Tom slams the charger door, whips off his belt, backs Julian up until he falls on his ass into a steaming puddle of unknown origin, and loops the leather around his neck.
He tugs him up by the belt, onto his toes, eliminating that fraction of height difference just so he can see the whites of this prick’s eyes.
He doubles the wrap of the belt in his fist, and Julian sputters something unintelligible through a thick choke.
“What’s wrong? Thought you liked this shit?” Tom pretends to wait for an answer that he prevents. “Oh, that’s right, you like being the one doing the choking. That gets your dick wet, huh? Beating on women?”
He wants nothing more than to choke this fucker unconscious and leave him on the streets for the hepatitis rats to chew on his toes, and, fuck it, if he ends up passing out by the time Tom’s done saying his peace, then so be it.
“You can see her all you want, asshole. Take her on as many dates as you like. But if I see one fuckin’ bruise on her-one red mark on that pretty skin-I’m gonna make the rest of your short life very fucking unpleasant. Comprende?”
89 notes
·
View notes
Text
You Warm My Heart
Yandere Hitoshi Shinso x Reader
Warnings: Drugging, kidnapping, dacryphilia, bondage, murder
Checkout my Master List here.
————————————————————————
The café is such a cozy place for you to get together with your best friend, Hitoshi. It’s cold outside, so he bought you a latte for you to warm yourself up.
“Are you warm enough?” He asks as he sits down next to you.
“Sure am!” You smile brightly at him.
“Why don’t you tell me about that guy you’ve been seeing?”
“Oh, him?” Your mouth instantly turns downwards. You take another sip of the vanilla drink to calm yourself a bit. “He stood me up. I can’t believe I fell for his whole game. He told me how beautiful I am, and how much I mean to him. He even asked me what kind of flowers I like so that he could give them to me.” After thinking about this for two days, it doesn’t get any easier to deal with.
Hitoshi leans in and rests a hand on your knee in a comforting way. “Hey, any guy would be lucky to have you. You’re a great girl, Y/N. Honestly, I don’t think there’s anyone out there who deserves you.”
You can’t help but look at him sweetly. “It’s just so hard, you know? After my last breakup, things have been really difficult for me. I thought he would be the one to help make things a little bit brighter in my life. He seemed so genuine.” Tears begin to brim your eyes.
He sees his moment and locks it in. He brushes away your tears as they fall with the pad of his thumb. “Don’t cry over that piece of shit. You’re way too good for him. Trash like that doesn’t deserve your tears.”
You giggle at his comforting words and grab his wrist to hold his hand. “Thank you, Hitoshi.”
You take another sip of your latte and begin to feel lightheaded. “God, Hitoshi, I don’t feel well.” You sink down in your seat a little bit.
The violet head takes your latte and sets it down on the coffee table. He helps you up, swinging an arm around your waist as he helps you put your weak limb over his shoulder. With a smirk that you can’t see, Hitoshi walks you out of the shop and over to his car. Putting you in the backseat, he straps you in and pets your hair gently. “It’ll be okay. It’ll all be okay, Y/N.”
———
You wake up in the living room of Hitoshi’s apartment with your wrists and ankles tied up with rope. Looking around, you spot him on a chair near the tv.
“Oh, you’re finally awake. How are you feeling?”
You’re too shocked and still feeling a bit fatigued to answer him at the moment.
He chuckles when you give no response and nods. “That’s alright. I’ll get you talking soon enough, but first, I want to show you something.” He takes the remote and turns on the news.
Unable to comprehend much of the situation that’s moving too fast for you to grasp, you watch the tv. Your interest piques when you see a handsome gentleman on the screen. It’s a photograph of him, lying on the street, covered in blood. The only thing found with him was his wallet, keys, and a bouquet of white roses. Your favorite flowers.
That was the man you thought stood you up.
Finally, you manage to whisper as your eyes are glued to the screen, “Why are you showing me this?”
Thinking your question is absolutely dumb, he laughs at you. “Why? I want you to see just how much I love you. This-” he gestures to the dead body on the news, “is how far I’m willing to go for you.”
You’re shaking now. “Hitoshi, you’re supposed to be my best friend. You’re really scaring me right now. Please, untie me.”
He turns the tv off, walks over to you, and sits down next to you on the couch. Brushing a few strands of hair behind your ear, he tells you in a gentle but firm tone, “I’ll untie you once I can trust you. You’re not leaving, and I’m not your friend anymore. I’m your boyfriend now. Earlier, I told you that there’s no one out there who deserves you, but I was wrong. I deserve you. You were meant for me. I’m going to be so good to you. Just, behave for me. Okay? That’s all I ask.”
Your stomach roils with displeasure. This entire situation is so messed up. You don’t even know what to do or what to say. You feel trapped. You ARE trapped. Not knowing what the hell is going to become of you is killing you so slowly.
Will I be locked up forever? Will I ever see the light of day again? Would he ever let me see my family? What am I going to do about my job?
You don’t even know the tears have fallen until Hitoshi swipes them away.
“Fuck, you’re so beautiful when you cry.”
#my hero acedamia#boku no hero academia#yandere#hitoshi shinso x reader#hitoshi shinso imagine#tw triggers
70 notes
·
View notes
Text
Chapter 5, Part 2 | Chapter 7
The Sparrow: Chapter 6: Playing to the Crowd
Synopsis: Marian reveals her story to the Capitol during her interview in a last-minute attempt to attract sponsors.
Warnings: Mention of alcoholism and substance abuse, objectification of narrator, some cursing.
Author’s Note: Happy new year, everybody!! I’ve loved seeing more and more Haymitch appreciation, so here’s some more of his POV, hope you enjoy!
Word Count: 1780
Somehow all the plucking and the waxing didn’t hurt as much the second time around. Granted there was less hair, but I think the anxious adrenaline of having to look sympathetic on screen minimised the sting. I barely felt the hairdresser tugging my thick strands into some ridiculous braided updo because my mind was completely elsewhere.
“What should I say?” I tried to turn my head towards Haymitch, who sat nonchalantly on the stool next to the huge red vanity of the dressing room but the stylist quickly snapped me back.
“Don’t worry about it too much. Just answer the questions genuinely.” He replied matter-of-factly, looking up quizzically at the hairstylist's hands working to pin another fake braid atop my head.
From the corner of my eye we shared a knowing glance of how ridiculous this all was.
I didn’t explicitly thank him for the gift… I had a feeling that that was better left unsaid, but everything felt more comfortable between us now. I knew he was truly on my side, no strings attached and the gift was the last piece of proof I needed.
We had been all smiles and jokes that morning, I felt a bit bad for Alder at the breakfast table. I had tried to include him in the conversation but he wasn’t very receptive. Haymitch even offered to be with him before the interview but he refused. Not that Alder needed any help- he got an 8 in training and was good looking enough to charm a crowd.
A little part of me was happy at his indifference towards the mentorship- I selfishly wanted to spend as much time as I could with Haymitch before the Games.
His presence had become a warm, familiar thing that I was absolutely dependent on.
Plus I needed his help now more than ever if I was going to make a successful last-minute plea for sponsors.
“Yeah, but-“ I began replying to Haymitch but the hairstylist cut me off with a monotone “Up.”
I swiftly obeyed until he reached for the tie of my robe, nearly undoing it.
“Hey!” I exclaimed, holding the thick towel material shut.
“Vanilla wants you dressed now,” he said unflinchingly, judging me from behind his pink-rimmed glasses.
“But… with him in the room?” I pointed towards Haymitch who was looking at the ceiling. I was shocked at the stylist’s neutrality as he shrugged. He quite literally couldn't care less about Haymitch’s presence.
“It’s alright, I’ll just…” Haymitch turned the stool around and faced the wall.
As if on queue, five more stylists came into the cramped dressing room and descended on me with another revealing black dress and plenty of glittery oil for my body. Vanilla trailed not far behind. I just hoped this one would be slightly more modest than my parade ensemble.
“You look absolutely gorgeous!” Vanilla exclaimed. That was not a good sign.
She turned me around to the nauseatingly bright full-length mirror and I could barely believe my eyes. Sure, this dress had more fabric, but I felt just as naked.
The dress was mostly just black lace with a low-cut strapless neckline that barely covered my breasts with just a layer of thinly padded lace. My torso was covered by a slightly more opaque mesh but my legs were pretty much exposed despite the gown’s length.
The lace was beautiful, I’ll give her that. It featured the most delicate bouquets of flowers throughout its entire length, but the fabric’s aesthetic value was the least of my concerns as I was strapped into toe-squeezing pointed glossy black high heels.
I felt utterly humiliated, and I was expected to smile and make conversation despite it.
Vanilla held my highlighted shoulders and admired her work in excitement. I didn’t want to look at myself so I turned my eyes up to the smooth white ceiling and crossed my arms to try to conceal what Vanilla’s dress accentuated so well.
After a few seconds she got bored of me and my lack of enthusiasm and wordlessly ushered her hoard of stylists out of the room.
As soon as the door closed behind them I turned around to find Haymitch still looking at the wall.
I smiled. That was considerate of him.
“You can turn around now,” I told him, tightly squeezing my arms over my chest but not having a solution to my exposed legs, “thanks.”
He grinned, looking only at my face.
“I think that gold eye makeup looks really nice. It makes your eyes pop.”
And in that utterly humiliating situation, Haymitch got a genuine, full-toothed smile out of me.
He looked good too. The button-up shirt hugged his subtle musculature just right, and despite the harsh light there was such a warmth on his face.
I loved the way his smile made his cheeks a little round in contrast to his masculine, harsh nose. But by far the best part was that unwavering blue-eyed glaze, so steadfast I could almost pinpoint some love behind it… almost.
I took a step forward, ignoring the pain of my feet. I knew I shouldn’t but-
“Come, come! It’s time to line up!” Vanilla’s high-pitched voice called from outside along with her repeated knocking on the door. It was probably for the best, but I felt slightly disappointed regardless.
I gave Haymitch a stern nod as I walked towards the door- a reassurance that despite it all, I was a woman of my word and tonight I’d stick to my promise. For both of us.
He nodded back just as Vanilla pulled me away.
—
I took my spot next to the other mentors just as Marian was taking the stage. I stood right in front of the mounted flat-screen as she walked across the stage, her teeth looking paper-white through red-coloured lips. Somehow the same M who was basically folding in on herself just a few minutes ago now stood tall and walked gracefully as she greeted Caesar Flickerman.
She was good at this.
Good.
The audience roared in whistles and claps as M waved some more before taking a seat on the chair across from the interviewer. It was an absolutely unprecedented reaction for a District 12 tribute.
They obviously viewed her as their pretty plaything, the unfortunate styling said as much. But the stubborn, petulant Marian was playing along now, wrapping Caesar and the audience around her freshly manicured finger with a big, fake smile.
“Wow, Marian! It’s hard to believe that such a pretty face hails from the mining district. Tell us, have you ever worked the mines?” Caesar asked through his own toothy smile. It may have been a cheesy question but one that could tug the right heartstrings (and wallets) if M played into it.
“Um, yes, yes.” I could tell she was thrown off by the question but she never dropped her smile. “I was younger than most but-”
“Oh! And how come?” Caesar acted as though every word out of her mouth was the most interesting thing he’d ever heard. It was so fake but damn was the audience eating it up. Even the mentors had gone quiet now.
“Well, I was eight years old when my mother died, which left me officially orphaned,” she shifted uncomfortably, letting the facade slip slightly. I hated that she had to do all of this. I hated that I had to encourage it. “But she was never really present, so I’ve been surviving on my own for a long time.”
“Tell us more about that,” Caesar’s voice was full of fabricated pity. I knew she would hate that but it was necessary. Her story would help humanise her and appeal to the performative charity of the sponsors.
I knew her story, most regulars at the Hobb did- everyone at least knew of Edalia Kuns and the child she left when her addiction caught up with her. Her dad was going to be hanged for having orchestrated some sort of rebellion at the mines, but he escaped instead, leaving his girlfriend and newborn daughter. Marian’s mom wasted her last penny on any alcohol, powder, or pill she could get her hands on. She caused such a mess around town, I remember overhearing merchants sharing their relief when they found out she had overdosed. It was despicable.
Marian started working the mines at 16, tragically young to be in such a dangerous, dirty place. Having gotten to know her, I don’t know how she didn’t let it harden her. Despite all of it she still inhabited this world with flowers on her collar and energy to tell stories to the huddled orphans on the street.
“And tell us, what was your first impression of the Capitol after leaving dreary District 12?” Caesar continued probing.
I took a deep breath, not believing that it wasn’t over.
“Oh, well, I’ve been taking some pretty life changing showers.”
The crowd erupted with laughter. They liked her. I knew that that was our goal but I couldn’t help the rising jealousy as I watched the crowd scan her up and down. With just a little more courage I wanted to match on that stage, swoop her away, and give her real clothes. Screw the Games. Screw the sponsors. I just wanted her to be safe.
“Ha! Well that certainly is a charming answer,” Caesar looked out at the crowd who applauded on queue, like well trained baboons, “now the question that is on everyone’s mind: is there a lucky boy back home, Marian?”
Ugh. This question.
Judging by her face, she thought the same thing.
“Oh, no,” her giggle was an intoxicating sound as it escaped from her red lips, “I was too busy trying to survive, unfortunately.”
More laughter. I rolled my eyes on her behalf.
“Well, Marian, it seems like the entire Capitol is in love with you right now!” Caesar exclaimed out to the audience while she gave one last big smile to the camera. She was really good. “And if you win you’ll certainly have your pick of Capitol men!”
She stood up and the crowd followed suit, whistling and cheering as she waved. She looked down and the gold on her eyelids highlighted the warm chestnut colour of her eyes.
The whole ensemble was painfully Capitol, except for that eyeshadow. That color was all Marian- warm, luminous, beautiful.
I didn’t even realise how much I missed her. How much I needed her by my side, the few hours of separation tugged at my heart.
What will happen when she’s gone into the arena?
Whatever the outcome I knew in that moment that I would never recover from Marian Cartwright.
—
Next Chapter
Masterlist
#the hunger games#haymitch#haymitch abernathy#hunger games au#hunger games fanfiction#thg haymitch#district 12#hunger games
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
my Opinions(tm) on the pla leaks
H-typhlosion: looks better in-game with the flame effects (which are purple, for bonus points) but overall idk why anyone would evolve cyndaquil, one of arceus' perfect creatures
H-decidueye: just a little guy with pants on. looks like a zelda enemy kinda. more charming than vanilla decidueye to me personally, def my favorite out of the starters
H-samurott: i mean, he exists?
H-arcanine: great design save for the colors. either the dark fur parts shouldve been darker and/or the red parts shouldve been less saturated imo but maybe this dude gets a killer shiny
H-electrode: you exist, alright
H-qwilfish: i genuinely forgot you existed until now tho
overqwil: It Just Gets Spikier
H-sneasel: ooouuughhh what a beautiful little gremlin. reminds me of gatomon somehow, i guess its the coloring
sneasler: adorable but the render a-pose really makes it look like a fursuit
ursaluna: pretty okay, why are his eyebrows like that tho. u got a problem bud?
H-lilligant: i think she looks nice! all i see is people being rude to her >:( i think the design would be perfect if she had pointy tappy toes instead of fully realized curly elf shoes tho
H-avalugg: i genuinely did not know we had an regular avalugg to begin with
H-sligoo: OHH HES GOT A LITTLE HOUSE...... i love him
H-goodra: oh i change my mind put it back
enamorous (incarnate): ok i gotta put out an unpopular opinion: i think this dude slaps, hes going straight into the pile of impish little weirdoes i identify with. an absolute flamboyant eyesore that looks tailor made to appeal to me only
enamorous (therian): you fucked it up! you had a perfect gremlin motherfucker and you fucked it up! (i know theres like a deeper mythological reference going on here dont @ me)
palkia and dialga (lord): honestly all they need is arms and would would be okay digimon. but in all seriousness i like that theyre fucked up in a particular way that bothers you, like an enochian angel or something. these arent animals that exist theyre fever dreams you get from hearing the voice of god
OVERALL: im someone who believes we just have enough pokemon so i appreciate that most of these are just hisuian variants. a lot of these were lesser utilized pokes and definitley pokes i never thought about/was utterly unaware of but in a way thats good because then this gives them a second chance to grow on people and thats nice :) also i am a enamorous stan now
35 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hey, i was wondering if you could write headcanons of Jonathan, Dio, Joseph, Jotaro, and Kakyoin with a black ready. It's okay if you don't want to!
Ahhhhhh my first request!!! Of course, i would love to!
btw im so sorry this took forever
❗️MAJOR SPOILERS FOR PARTS 2-4
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jojos + Dio Brando/DIO + Kakyoin with a Black s/o
Jonathan
Would be an absolute gentleman as always
Will also spoil you constantly with whatever you wanted or needed
Compliments on how radiant your skin is on a daily basis
Protects you against anyone who is disrespectful towards you
I feel like his father wouldn’t approve since this is the 1800s 😳
but Jonathan doesnt give a fuck he’d marry you regardless
Lovely picnics with him are an absolute must
Women are genuinely jealous you pulled him
Rub it in their faces tbh
You are a queen/king that pulled an amazing man
Dio also tries to take you away from him just to spite him
That didnt end well and got his ass handed to him
Overall genuinely he would love you with all his heart
DIO
Rude to you constantly tbh
Like honestly you probably doubt him 24/7
But fear not
He really does love you
But probably not as much as you love him
Would spoil you a bit
Usually you are just stuck in the palace with him, but he definitely wont hesitate to kill a minion if they get too close to you
Enyaba is mega jealous af
but DIO makes sure she doesnt do anything you
Read to him
He loves it so much
I KNOW Vanilla Ice’s gay ass is also jealous
Sex is a must cause honestly he’s such a hornball
The closest thing to a date you guys would have is reading together or you reading to him in silence
Probably with him before he stole jonathans body
Joesph
You met while you were corned by the police with smokey
Immediately fell in love with your headstrong but goofy personality and beautiful skin
You show him around New York
His recklessness causes a strain on your relationship tho
lots of arguments about
but fear not you both love each other dearly
You went with him to Italy
Suzie Q is a little jealous
Though he is jealous of Caesar flirting with you
Makeouts! i swear hes a horndog himself 🤷🏾♀️
FEED
HIM
honestly he needs some of that black food himself cause damn i know some food can be dry 😒
He probably also cheats on you (Josuke)
But he again genuinely loves you
So hopefully you guys stay together
Jotaro
Jotaro is definitely a hard one to get
You two most likely started dating during the trip to Egypt
When you two get together please patient with him
He’s not good with affection in public or probably in private either
I think he’d let you lead with giving affection till he gets the hand of it
Both him and star won’t hesitate to protect you
You constantly worry about his safety during the trip and vise versa
Surpise
Kisses
Be willing to listen to him talk about marine biology
Honestly cook for him he loves it
If you die during the Egypt trip he will be devastated and have a hard time moving on
If you survive, he will be happy and want to be with you forever
Kakyoin
Started during the Egypt trip as well
Tbh i honestly think both Jotaro and Kakyoin like you
But you chose Kakyoin
As long as youre happy, Jotaro is (But he will ora the shit out of Kakyoin if he makes you upset)
You guys sit next to each other druing every car trip
and whenever its his turn to drive, you sit in the passenger seat next to him
If youre into gaming omfg
Talking abt gaming a lot
When kakyoin goes against D’arby’s brother
cheer him on!
When he loses you try
You almost win but still lose
At least ur dolls together 🥺
You watched him fling into the water tower
It felt as if time slowed down and you were slowly losing half of yourself
You are one of the surviving members
and you are completely devastated
Honestly those 50 days
were the best days of your life 😢
#jjba#poc friendly#fluff#angst#jotaro x black!reader#joseph joestar x black!reader#jonathan joestar x black!reader#DIO x black!reader#kakyoin x black!reader#black s/o#jotaro x reader#kakyoin x reader#joseph joestar x reader#jonathan joestar x reader#dio x reader
208 notes
·
View notes
Text
Dirty ABCs | Seokjin and Angel
Grab your water because this is getting thirsty!
Pairing: Seokjin x reader/OC (Angel)
Wordcount: 2.3k
Genre: headcanons, smut, fluff
Rating: 18+, minors dni
Trigger warnings: Cockwarming, Cumshots (face, mouth, chest), Creampie, Cumeating, Bondage, Saint Andrew‘s Cross, Impact play, Nipple and clit spanking, Riding crop, Objectification, Body tray (using body as a food tray), Submission (slave) and domination, Discipline and punishment, Deegradation, Pinning, Masturbation, Oral sex, Sex toys (vibrator, nipple pumps, clamps, wrist restraints, cockrings). Mentions of threesome, mild exhibitionism and teasing in public.
Edited by Goddess Almighty, Queen Of My Heart, @joheunsaram, this is all for you, muffin 😘🥰
Here’s my masterlist
Enjoy 💜✨
Aftercare: For Seokjin, aftercare is mostly a way for him to calm down and for Angel to take care of him emotionally. Angel is usually okay after a scene as long as Seokjin isn’t feeling guilty or dirty or distant. So it’s mostly her performing aftercare on him, while he prefers staying on the receiving end, getting his body scrubbed and his hair washed, or being fed while being held. He really likes being hugged while talking. He’s also into cockwarming after sex, since he feels like he’s being protected and that he’s reconnecting with his vanilla side.
Body part: TITS. Jin loves the entirety of Angel, but he has a thing for her chest. And her face. She’s so beautiful, and so clean-faced. He loves being the only one who sees her pretty face crumble in pleasure when she cums for him. Now, Angel loves Seokjin’s hands and lips. He loves watching his lips kiss and suck at any part of her body.
Cum: Seokjin loves to cum inside Angel’s mouth. When he’s feeling especially naughty, he wants to cum on her face, then get inside her and see her ecstatic expression covered in his semen as he coaxes an orgasm out of her. Angel likes cumming on his cock, mostly because of how whiny he gets when she squeezes him with her cunt; plus, once she discovers she can cum without him touching her clit, just ramming inside her, she decides that’s her new favourite way to orgasm.
Dirty secret: Seokjin wants to tie Angel up to a Saint Andrew’s Cross and use a riding crop to spank her clit and nipples. Of course he has plans to make that happen, he just needs to figure out a couple more details. Like whether he should buy a cross and then turn it into… a coffee-table? Angel wants Seokjin to use her body as a food tray, ignoring her entirely while he eats, only to turn her around and fuck her against the table once he’s done. She wants to be treated like a slave just once. Just to try.
Experience: Jin has had a couple of partners before Angel, but he never went that far. He’s always been a freak, but way too restrained to try things out. Only with Angel he realised he could get what he wanted without feeling like he was disrespecting his partner. Angel has had maybe two partners. Maybe just one — the guy who cheated on her with a girl they had a threesome with. He was a freak through and through, and it only felt natural for Angel to join him, but she’s always been a bit of a freak — and she has always known that.
Favourite position: MIS-SIO-NA-RY. For both of them. A soft go-to for romantic sex and a hard and fast jackhammering. Though there is some debate on cowgirl — especially once Seokjin starts shoving Angel on his cock.
Goofy: these two can be major goofs when having sex. It’s pretty common for them to start laughing when something is extremely out of character, but they have a special look they exchange to make sure that laughing is okay at that moment. Such an agreement came after the mood was ruined by inappropriate cackling, so they found a way to look for the other’s permission. Once one of them starts laughing, the other one follows suit. After releasing tension by chuckling, the sex turns very playful, the best expression of Angel and Seokjin’s genuine friendship and companionship.
Hair: Seokjin keeps things neat, but he doesn’t put too much effort on that. He prefers staying as natural as possible, with some trimming when the situation gets out of hand. Angel trims her hair short, she has a specific electric razor to make sure it doesn’t get long but also so she can shave comfortably and safely.
Intimacy: Seokjin aims at intimacy mostly during aftercare, when he needs to feel Angel extra close and loving. Also, on romantic nights. Sometimes he just needs to go vanilla-galore all over her, and spoil her and just… treat her like a goddess. During soft lovemaking, these two just say ‘I love you’ a lot. Most of their intimacy is unspoken and really physical rather than verbal.
Jack off: Well, there are cases where it’s strictly necessary. Though Angel does it a bit more than Jin, he still is a pro at it. He actually prefers when she’s around to do it for him, or can “assist”. He just wants to cum on her tits or her mouth. Or her face. Angel just uses toys when Seokjin is away. Or sometimes when he’s around but is feeling lazy and is not in the mood and she needs to get laid: she simply picks up her small, efficient vibrator and gets stuff done. Though sometimes Seokjin changes his mind…
Kink: Ooh… Seokjin is learning how to actually dominate. However, he already knows a couple things, like punishments, discipline, degradation and impact play. He sorts of assumes he’s into restraints too, but he’s still trying to figure that out. Angel truly enjoys power dynamics, and she absolutely adores subbing for Seokjin, especially since her ex never had the kind of authority that Jin can muster and impose on her so easily. She likes being pinned and degraded by Seokjin. She finds it extremely exciting when he grabs her and uses her a little, when he doesn’t give her a chance to fight back. She likes feeling overwhelmed by him, like she’s finally unraveling him from that polished outside that he curates so expertly. She loves being the only one that gets to feel the beastly part of him on her own body. Truth is, she’s even more proud of being the one who lets him liberate himself and finally embrace his true passion and pleasure.
Location: Their home because Seokjin is shy. But as long as there’s a flat surface and a lock on the door, he’s game. Actually — the flat surface is not truly necessary. Just wait and see. Anyway, Seokjin is super glad that Angel is almost always ready when he wants to get dirty. Most of the time he’s the one dictating when and where, and Angel is entirely okay with that. Saturday night in their apartment is code for “do not disturb, we’re smashing. Maybe across the kitchen floor so absolutely do not enter”. If they’re out in public, there’s a very low chance of Angel teasing him. If she does, she’s very subtle, and in a rather private public place. Think of a hand on his thigh while he’s driving with her somewhere. Blowing him in the bathroom of a rooftop restaurant.
Motivation: The easiest way for Seokjin to get horny is seeing Angel showing off her boobs. If she's going around the house in a t-shirt and a pair of shorts (no bra), consider her busy for the next two hours minimum. She's most definitely trying to get fucked. Sometimes she might even forgo the shirt too. Seokjin can't stand her being stressed, because of her being moody and hard to deal with, he'd much rather get some dopamine and oxytocin running through her by fucking her against the kitchen table. Especially if she's being exceedingly argumentative. However, if she's truly stressed and tired, then expect him to take the lead and try to relax her as… as deep as he can. Angel's greatest weakness is watching Jin doing the housekeeping. Cooking is excellent for sex on the counter. The laundry is freaking amazing for sex on the washing machine — even better if the machine is running. But the absolute best is when he's using the mop for the floors and she can drop her clothes and scold him for not cleaning properly. It always drives him mad and subsequently leads to Angel getting fucked exactly the way she wants.
No: Third parties in the room. Angel absolutely doesn't want to share. It's mostly due to her past experiences rather than Seokjin himself. That's her only strong no. Seokjin supports her fully and he has no interest in adding anyone to their mix. Angel is more than enough to deal with. Jin has a couple hard No’s, mostly linked with Angel teasing him in public, but also her flirting with other people. She’s rather cheeky and he gets a bit mad when she gets too comfortable with his friends. On more sexual terms, he’s still exploring; however, he already knows he’s not okay with anything considered strictly hardcore.
Oral: sloppy, hungry, fast. That's the way Seokjin wants it done. Yes he's fucking hung, but he doesn't care how much Angel takes in her mouth (throat, actually), he rewards the enthusiasm. He appreciates plenty of sucking, and encourages Angel in pumping his balls in her mouth. Angel goes insane with oral sex. I mean, have you seen his mouth? Meow, purrfect. He can make a kitty purr for sure. Angel's most definitely.
Pace: The fastest, the furiousest. This man is a fucking train. He won't stop. Till he's broken Angel through and through. Though some slow rolling of hips is used to tease and arouse and torture, and eventually to please on calmer, sweeter nights. Nevertheless, they both prefer to go as hard as possible. If they don't break they're not done yet.
Quickie: strictly limited to emergencies, but they love them. They can't have casual quickies because they usually turn on multiple rounds and torture, so they must be on a schedule, like ten minutes left before one or both of them has an appointment or has to leave. Usually that happens with Angel bent over or pinned to the wall while Seokjin goes wild all over her.
Risk: Depends. Usually no. If Angel's been naughty enough, well, Seokjin can consider. It's mostly about restaurant bathrooms, car back seats, and some very mild inappropriate touching on lifts, think of Angel standing before him, discreetly rubbing her ass against his crotch. Oh, and one backstage storage room. Once. Never gonna happen ever again.
Stamina: if I had to rate it, I'd say 8/10 solid. The point is burning out, not burning steady. The goal is running out of energy, so they don't hold back, they do their thing for however long that takes. But Seokjin can most definitely handle multiple rounds. His record is probably four, but he doesn't like going there often. Foreplay and one or two rounds is more than enough for him
Toy: a big yes for Angel. For Seokjin too once he gets used to the idea of them. Angel likes vibrators, the more unusual the better. It needs to do something that a dick can’t do, so no dildos. A big yes for breast-toys (her boobies are hella sensitive). She’s also a fan of restraints (mostly hand ones but not exclusively) and impact toys. A big toy freak. Seokjin embraces her love for cockrings (especially vibrating ones).
Unfair: Seokjin? Yes. Very. Angel won’t get to cum unless he has tortured her for at least twenty minutes. Sometimes he sets a timer and edges her until it rings. Sometimes he keeps her tied up while he cums over her body — her chest especially. He likes reminding her consistently that he is superior to her as long as the scene is going. But once it’s over, he is quick to remind her she’s his partner, his equal, and anything that happened during the scene was just an act.
Volume: Angel is super quiet. She can exercise incredible volume control — and she is particularly encouraged to do so by the fact that Seokjin can be extremely shy about his moans and grunts, keeping them on the low. Especially when going vanilla, she really needs to pay attention to spot his little whines. At some point in their relationship, she admits she wouldn’t mind him controlling himself a bit less, vocally speaking, and from there on Seokjin gets gradually less shy, finally being the loud, messy man he is in his everyday life.
Wild card: Seokjin practices impact play on pillows when Angel is not at home. Mostly to make sure his game gets really safe and good before he uses any new toy on her. Once he learns how to use a riding crop, Angel can’t stop asking for it for weeks.
X-Ray: Girth? Considerable. Length? Excessive. The combo makes it impossible to take him without a stretch. He’s a grower. Angel’s power is all in her boobs. Her ass is on the flat side, but Seokjin wouldn’t have it any other way.
Yearning: Seokjin is the usual two-rounds-on-Saturday-night kind of dude when he first gets intimate with Angel, but mostly because he thinks that’s the way it’s supposed to be. He wants it a lot more. Once they start exploring, he feels free to ask for foreplay or sex pretty much whenever he wants to. Angel is up for daily masturbation/oral sex. They either end up going kinky on Saturday night, or doing the nasty mid-week and go for some fond, soft vanilla once Saturday night rolls in. Still, they’re not the kind to go two or three nights in a row: too exhausting.
Zzz: Angel gets sleepy during aftercare, but she tries to stay up as long as possible if Seokjin doesn’t feel okay. Sometimes he notices she’s sleepy and reassures her she can fall asleep, since the greatest comfort for him is knowing that no matter how cruel he was to her during playtime, she loves him and feels safe to sleep in his arms. Oh, and he’s clingy. He spoons.
#seokjin headcanons#seokjin scenario#kim seokjin x reader#seokjin smut#seokjin fluff#Seokjin imagine#seokjin x angel
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
One Chance is All Some Get - 2
Part One // Part Three- Masterlist
Word Count: 7.3k
Warnings: family being stupid, swearing, allusions to sex
Mathew Barzal couldn’t believe it, he was helping his best friend into an outfit appropriate for a first date. “Anthony, you’re going to a coffee shop, not the Ritz. You don’t need to pick something that you would wear before a game, keep it simple,” Mat advised Anthony and he couldn’t help but to roll his eyes at how stupid he was being. It was obvious to anyone who looked into their apartment that Anthony hadn’t been on a date for longer than he would like to admit.
“The date isn’t for another three hours, why are you stressing so much?” Mat was genuinely curious, he had never seen his best friend act in this way before.
“Because,” Anthony started as he went to pick out a black pair of jeans to go with the shirt he had already selected, “I think she’s the one. Fate keeps bringing us together, so it has to mean something, eh?”
It took Mat a few seconds to figure out who he was on about, but his face lit up as soon as he figured it out. “It’s that doctor girl, eh?” he spoke as he started poking him. Anthony didn’t need to say anything as the blush on his face gave away the answer but still, he nodded to confirm Mat’s suspicion. “Good on you mate, she’s pretty and has the brains for the two of you.”
Anthony looked at him sternly but wasn’t able to hold it for too long as he burst out laughing. He had to agree with his friend and linemate because he was absolutely right, Anthony wasn’t as smart as he would have liked to be and hoped that this wouldn’t hinder him on his date. Surely Sarah wasn’t going to delve into the depths of something she had learnt in school because she knew that he was simply a hockey player. He knew about concussion, mainly because he had been subject to the league’s protocol more frequently than he would like to admit. But anything past that, he was clueless.
As she slipped on a pair of ballet flats, Sarah called out to Rebecca letting her know that she was about to leave for her date. Rebecca basically sprinted out of her room to wish her best friend a nice day and reminded her to keep her location on in case she forgot to text her. Sarah rolled her eyes, even though she understood the intent behind it and knew that Rebecca always had her back, no matter what.
The subway wasn’t overly packed and Sarah found her way to the coffee shop a little after three as she had to use Google Maps to find the shop but was thankful to see Anthony sat at a table near the front of the shop. He had what looked like to be some sort of coffee (Sarah honestly had no clue about the different sorts of coffee, she knew the difference between an iced and hot and that was the extent) and a few different pastries that looked to be untouched, she could only hope that he had selected them hoping to try them with her, but she didn’t want to make any assumptions. As she moved through the tables, she was able to get Anthony’s attention and he pushed himself up from where he was at.
It seemed like both of them had the same thought as both went in for a hug, but awkwardly stopped as their arms were a small distance from their torso. Their eyes met and both let out a small chuckle and realised that the other wanted the same thing so shared in a quick hug and greeting. Anthony walked around to pull out the chair for Sarah to sit on, thanking his lucky stars that he didn’t accidentally pull it out from underneath her, but when she was sitting at the table he asked her what she wanted to drink. Her response was amusing, to say the least, “if it has caffeine, it's good. But some sort of vanilla coffee would be perfect.” He nodded and quickly headed over to the barista to get himself a refill and whatever the barista suggested that contained vanilla in. The barista nodded and said that he’d bring them over when they were ready and as Anthony paid, he slipped a twenty-dollar bill into the tip jar because the service he had received so far was above and beyond what he expected.
“They’ll be over in a few minutes,” Anthony told Sarah and indicated that she was to help herself to any of the snacks on the table. Sarah raised her eyebrows and opened her mouth to protest, but Anthony was quicker. “You are not paying me back, my treat for you having to deal with me multiple times in multiple places,” he said with a smile.
Sarah couldn’t help but smile back, you could tell that Anthony was a hockey player as he had a fighting sense about him, but in a soft way. He wasn’t trying to get into anyone’s face but he was more than happy to look after those who he cared about, and it seemed like Sarah was already one of those people.
The barista walked over with their drinks and Anthony started a simple conversation by asking about college and how she was enjoying the city. Sarah knew she could have spoken for days about that so kept it short and sweet, but Anthony immediately noticed that she was holding back and encouraged her to talk truthfully about the course. She had never been in the company of someone like this before, usually, the friends she had made before wanted to talk about themselves and their problems and couldn’t care for the issues she was experiencing. Anthony was different, he allowed her to express her emotions truthfully and she immediately felt at ease opening up to him, not fully yet, and letting him know about the hardships that she was facing at the moment.
Their conversation flowed better than either of them could ever imagine; by the time they had finished their second and third coffees, Sarah checked the time on her phone to realise that it was almost 6 pm. She didn’t want to leave Anthony because she was enjoying the time that she was spending with him, bringing him home wasn’t an option. After all, that would insinuate that she wanted something out of him that she wasn’t comfortable doing just yet, so she suggested the next best thing. “I know a place that does really good Mexican food, want to grab dinner?” Sarah really hoped that it didn’t come across as too demanding or wanting more out of this than either of them wanted, but the date was going well and she wanted to spend more time in his company.
“As long as they do a pitcher of margaritas, I’m in,” Anthony replied with a laugh. He was really enjoying himself and didn’t want to leave Sarah’s company. She was funny, quick-witted, but most of all, she was understanding. He could understand exactly why she was the sort of person people would want to be their doctor. When he was speaking to her, he could tell that she was paying her full attention to him, as if the rest of the world didn’t exist.
The fact that she genuinely wanted to spend more time with him was a mystery, to Anthony at least. Most people he knew tried to spend as little time with him as possible because he was such a closed book and it took the majority a few cracks to break through the hard exterior he had built. Sarah had broken through it within the first minute of their date. He knew that she was going to be special to him.
Sarah told Anthony the address and he quickly called an Uber for the two of them to share. It was a few minutes before it was to arrive, so he went back up to the barista to thank them for their drinks once again and he did slip another bill into the tip jar on behalf of himself and Sarah. The barista that made their drinks gave him a cheeky wink and told Anthony that he expected to see him again but this time as more than friends. Anthony knew that he had picked a good place for a first date and he would have to bring the team there as the ambience was good, but the quality of the coffee was something that other establishments wished they could make.
The Uber pulled up on the sidewalk and Anthony checked that it was the right one for the two of them before opening the door to allow Sarah to slide into the car. They shared a short conversation with the driver on their drive to the restaurant but most of the time Sarah spent sneaking looks at Anthony. It wasn’t like she was the first person to take a liking to his looks, but the more that she got to know him, the more she started to fall for the person he was.
As they pulled up to the restaurant, they both thanked the driver and Anthony was quick to dart around to open the door for Sarah once again. He really hoped that his acts of kindness weren’t too much for Sarah but continued to act in the same way as he opened the door to the restaurant for her. The pair waited to be seated and Anthony started looking over the menu to see what there was. It seemed like the majority of it was soft shell tacos and you picked the fillings that you wanted and he completely understood why Sarah liked this place so much. The variety was large and the cost was low.
They were seated in a small booth and ordered a pitcher of margarita to share, Anthony insisted that they got some glasses even though they both knew that they would be using straws to drink out of the jug. “Usually, I just get the steak, chicken and black beans as a filling, but that’s just what me and Rebecca are a fan of,” Sarah told Anthony. He nodded back in appreciation and quickly scanned the menu but told her as she was the one with the knowledge of this place, she should get what she knew was good. When the food arrived, Anthony’s eyes widened. They only ordered a few bowls of food, but they were filled to the top, almost overflowing, and he knew that if Sarah knew of this gem in the city, what other gems could she know of.
Anthony quickly whipped out his phone to take a few photos of the beautiful girl across from him as she wrapped her lips around the straw in the pitcher. Sarah looked incredibly carefree and she asked him to send her the photos to remind her of this date. He kept making a mess of his tacos and she kept laughing at him as somehow he had spilt salsa onto the side of the pitcher, this should have been impossible for the average person, but Sarah was learning that Anthony was more than just the average person. He had the ability to make her laugh for hours on end, as shown by the fact that their date had continued for much longer than either of them were expecting.
“Could we get a portion of churros too?” Sarah asked Anthony sweetly, “I know it might not be on your meal plan, but they’re so good.” Anthony nodded, knowing that his trainers would be able to notice he had gone off plan, but how could he say no to the girl he had it bad for.
Sarah knew that this might be out of her comfort zone, but she wanted to try it nonetheless. She picked up a churro from the small bucket on their table, dipped it in the chocolate sauce and leant over to try and feed Anthony the dessert. She was lucky that he noticed what she was trying to do and opened his mouth to try the sweet treat. As he started chewing on it, he realised why Sarah had wanted to try these. These churros were the best that he had ever had and by the smile on her face, Sarah knew that she had made a good choice in bringing him to this place.
Quietly, Sarah excused herself from the table to go to the washroom when they had finished the churros. She texted Rebecca to let her know that she could do whatever she wanted for dinner as she had already eaten, then fluffed her hair up in the mirror, ensuring that she was still presentable. When she returned to the table, Anthony was finishing off the margarita and she couldn’t help giggle. “Everything has been paid for,” Anthony told her. “As I said, my treat.”
Sarah rolled her eyes slightly, which didn’t go unnoticed by Anthony but he chose to ignore it as he offered her his hand and the pair walked out of the restaurant. Sarah wasn’t particularly sure what had come over her during the evening, but she still hadn’t had enough of his company so asked if he just wanted to go on a walk before she headed home. He agreed and they began to walk the streets of New York city aimlessly.
Eventually, somewhere in the city, Anthony checked his watch hoping that it was before 8 pm so he could get a relatively good sleep before the morning skate. He was in luck, it was half-past seven so he told Sarah that he needed to get back to his place soon but wanted to make sure that she had gotten home safe too. Sarah blushed slightly as she had heard from Rebecca’s many failed dates that most of the men she went to dinner with didn’t care if she got home safely unless they wanted sex from her. Both Sarah and Rebecca wanted to find someone who cared about them, not someone who wanted to use their body and add another notch to their bedpost.
Sarah pulled out her phone to figure out where she was and which train lines she needed to jump on to get back to her apartment. “Sarah,” Anthony said, “let me call you an Uber, that way I know you’ve made it back safely.”
She flinched slightly, unsure if she could trust Anthony with her address so offered a compromise, “how about I pay for the Uber and you pay it back to me if you’re so insistent on paying for it,” Sarah laughed. Anthony agreed and allowed the girl to call the car.
The ride took about 15 minutes as the traffic had passed rush hour and both of them were sitting comfortably in the back seats of the car. Anthony had kept his hand clasped with Sarah and began to rub small circles on the back of her hand, to ensure that she felt safe. Sarah quickly checked to see what Rebecca was doing, watching Brooklyn 99 in bed, and sent her a message to say that she was almost back. Rebecca swiftly responded making sure that Sarah knew that she would want all the details of what happened to which Sarah rolled her eyes.
Anthony caught her doing this, so Sarah passed her phone to him so he could read the text too. He lightly chuckled but before he could type a reply to Rebecca, the car began to slow down as they reached the complex where she lived. The pair thanked the driver, and Sarah made the split-second decision to tip him well as he drove them safely. As Sarah stepped out of the car, Anthony was there offering her his hand and they walked to the front door. He waited until the Uber was out of sight before speaking.
“I had a really good day today,” he started, remembering Anders' words of encouragement, “and I’d really like to see you again.”
“I’d love to see you again too,” Sarah replied, looking up into Anthony’s eyes. She rose onto her tiptoes and leant in towards him and he almost had an internal meltdown, but instead, he leaned in towards her too. The pair shared a short but sweet first kiss and Anthony brought Sarah into a tight hug.
“I don’t know if this is too fast or not,” Anthony started, trying not to ramble his head off, “but, would you like to be my girlfriend? You’ve caught my eye every time we’ve met and I just thi-”
He was cut off by Sarah pressing her lips to his once again but this kiss was slightly less innocent. Her tongue slipped into his mouth gently and it felt right, but Anthony knew that if he didn’t stop now, he would have a harder time stopping further down the line. “Yes,” Sarah told him firmly, “yes, I would love to be your girlfriend.” He pulled her in for one final kiss before wishing her a good night.
Anthony, thank you for an amazing afternoon and evening, I can’t wait to see you again. Classes will probably be kicking my ass, but we can grab coffee whenever you’re near the hospital?x
Sarah sent the text as she was slumped on her bed. Anthony had made her feel things that she hadn’t felt in years. The affection that he showed towards her made her feel loved? Was that the right word, it was something new that she enjoyed, he was an amazing person to spend time with and she couldn’t wait to see him again.
Rebecca pushed a mug of coffee towards Sarah as she tried to scope out the situation from the previous night. All she knew was that the two of them had spent a lot longer with each other than they had planned to. She wanted detail, but not too much detail as sex lives should stay private, to which Sarah blushed, reminding her friend that she still hadn’t done that with anyone yet. Sarah told her everything, from the coffee shop, to the Mexican place, to just wandering around the city. Rebecca could sense that there was something that Sarah hadn’t told her, she knew not to push as this would be unfair on her friend.
“Andhekindakissedmeandaskedmetobehisgirlfriend,” Sarah rambled. Rebecca’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped. Did Sarah just say what she thought she did?
“Could you say that again, but slightly slower?” Rebecca asked, trying to process what Sarah had just said to her.
“And he kinda kissed me, and asked me to be his girlfriend,” Sarah repeated, hiding behind the sleeves of her shirt, making sure that her blush wasn’t visible.
“You’re dating him, aren’t you?” Rebecca asked, even though she knew the answer.
All Sarah could do was nod and Sarah brought her into a tight hug, “you deserve to be happy, and I can tell he makes you happy,” Rebecca whispered into her best friend’s ear.
It seemed like the next month went a lot faster than Anthony or Sarah could imagine. He met up with her two or three times a week for a coffee or to take her out for lunch. It was the best time for them as they were less likely to be spotted by fans and Anthony was often at games or on a plane during the evening so dinner dates were hard to come by. Now, this wasn’t to say that they didn’t go for dinner, it was usually at one of their places, they did kick their roommates out for the eating portion of the evening, but they usually crashed by the time the couple were watching a movie to end the evening. When Sarah went to Anthony’s place, she began to stay over because she didn’t want to risk going home alone late at night, which he understood.
He said that she could sleep in his bed and he’d take the sofa but Sarah told him that couples could share a bed. He was stumped, he knew that if he shared a bed with her he might start thinking with something other than his brain, but she insisted that the Islanders couldn’t have their star winger hurting himself because he was sleeping on a sofa. Anthony sighed, but agreed to share a bed with her.
As she left his en-suite barefaced, he was able to take in her natural beauty. His oversized shirt engulfed her petite body and he opened his arms to bring her in for a cuddle. Sarah immediately relaxed into Anthony’s arms, it had become her safe space, and he kissed her forehead softly. “C’mon,” Anthony whispered, “you’re tired, let’s sleep yeah?” He didn’t receive a verbal answer, but the gentle snores were an answer enough.
Anthony didn’t know what to expect when Sarah asked him to accompany her Christmas shopping. Was she a shopaholic, someone who knew exactly what gift to get for each member of her family, or did she pick up what she thought looked good? Apparently, she had a list for each family member that she needed to get a gift for but she refused to show him what was on the list for him. They went to Macy’s, Bloomingdales and Saks Fifth Avenue and after three hours following his girlfriend and helping her carry the bags around, his feet were aching. He had managed to find somewhere for them to grab a quick lunch.
“So,” Anthony started as he placed down their drinks on the table in front of them, “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.” Sarah raised one of her eyebrows, she was slightly worried because Anthony was radiating some nerves.
“I don’t need to hide a body, do I?” She laughed, trying to ease some of the nerves that he was clearly feeling.
“Nah, I promise,” he replied. “It’s technically two questions but-”
“Baby,” Sarah reached over to grasp his hand in hers, “take your time.” She looked at him lovingly, they hadn’t said the words to each other just yet, but Sarah was feeling things for Anthony that she hadn’t felt for anybody else.
“You know how I’m playing on Christmas Eve,” Anthony began. Sarah nodded as she took a bite into her sandwich, allowing him to continue. “I was wondering if you and your parents wanted to come and watch?”
“Of course baby,” Sarah replied enthusiastically. “I mean, they know I’m dating you, and have been asking about coming to a game as Newark really isn’t far.” Anthony rolled his eyes at this as he knew exactly how close Newark was. “You said there were two questions?” Sarah prompted him.
“Yeah, do you want to come to Quebec with me during bye week?” He asked. Sarah almost choked on her bite of sandwich, was he really asking her to come home with him for a week?
“I’ll need to see if I’m free,” she stuttered out, not really sure how to answer the question.
“Let’s get through the game with your family first,” Anthony reassured her, “you can make your decision on Quebec at any time, baby.”
At practice the next day, Anthony was quick to corner Anders and explain the situation. He had invited his girlfriend and her family to their game and was wondering if he should offer them all jerseys or nothing, and he was starting to overwork himself. “Dude,” Anders told the young winger, “get her a jersey if you want her to wear one, get the rest of the family scarves or something. Aren’t they all Devils fans anyways?” Anthony nodded after hearing how much Steven could ramble on about the stats of the current Devils team. “Something small, maybe get them to be left on their seats?”
And that’s exactly what Anthony did, he gave Sarah one of his game-worn jerseys and left a scarf and hat on the seat of her parents and two brothers. The five of them took in the atmosphere present and consumed slightly too many nachos. Anthony made sure that they came down to ice level before puck drop and he flicked a puck over the ice for each member of the family. It was a lot easier to get one to Steven and Simon because they towered over both their parents and younger sister.
“That boy of yours is nice,” Sarah’s mother commented, genuinely taking an interest in the boy who her only daughter was seeing.
“I wouldn’t be dating him otherwise,” Sarah replied, mesmerised at the speed Anthony could reach on the ice. “He’s been good to me so far, but it's only been a month and a half.”
“It seems like a lot longer,” Steven butted in. “She’s been heart-eyed over him since they first met.” Sarah resisted the temptation to roll her eyes but reluctantly nodded in agreement. It wasn’t like her eldest brother was wrong, so she had no basis to argue.
“Just be careful,” Simon, her other brother, advised. “I know how hockey players can be.”
“Just because all the players you knew in your frat were sleeping with a different girl every night, doesn’t mean that all hockey players do that,” Sarah sighed, hoping that the puck was going to drop soon. She chose to sit between her parents, with the hat that her boyfriend had gifted to each family member perched on her head.
Hockey wasn’t the easiest sport to understand, but she was able to explain the basics to her mother as the first period went by. Anthony behaved himself for the most part aside from a few swears that the entire crowd could hear when he missed a shot that was apparently easy for him. Sarah sent him a text during the intermission, but she wasn’t sure if he would be able to see it, so she made her way to the food stands to collect some more snacks for the game.
As she made her way back through the crowd to her seat, she felt some eyes giving her more attention than she thought that she deserved. It was strange, to say the least, but she tried to shake it off and wanted to enjoy the rest of the evening with her family. They all cheered when Anthony got his first point of the game, an assist for a Barzal goal. They all booed when the Bruins scored to level the playing field. But the best moment was when there were 5.8 seconds left on the clock and Anthony broke away from the defenders, took on the goaltender and scored. He looked up to see Sarah in the stands and pointed in her direction, not trying to give away who she was, but their eyes met and that was when Anthony knew.
Anthony knew that he wanted Sarah to be at all of his games, he wanted her to be the one he came home to, he wanted her to be the one at his side at the galas. Anthony loved her.
Did he really have to be named the first star of the night? All Anthony wanted to do was see his girlfriend who he hoped was waiting outside the dressing room. He tried to stay focussed when talking to the reporters, and when he made his way back onto the ice but his mind was somewhere else. He wanted to get a quick shower and then go out for dinner with his girlfriend’s family. Was that too much to ask for? Apparently so.
As Anthony walked out of the changing room, Anders had to remind him that he either needed to tie his tie or lose it completely somewhere in the middle wasn’t ideal, he spotted his girlfriend. Sarah ran towards Anthony and pulled him into a hug. “Well done Mr first star of the game,” she whispered into his ear, slightly seductively.
“If you keep talking like that, we won’t be going to dinner tonight,” Anthony joked. In response, Sarah rolled her eyes but dragged him towards her family.
“Anthony, meet my mother, my father and Tweedledum and Tweedledee, Steven and Simon,” Sarah explained, pointing at each member as she said their name. Anthony felt like he had already been accepted by the family as Sarah’s mother brought him into a tight hug. He shook hands with her brothers and father and Simon immediately brought him into a quick conversation about his intentions with his sister. Anthony was truthful saying that he saw a future with her, even though they hadn’t been together for too long. It seemed to be the right answer as Steven then started a conversation about where they were going for dinner.
The walk from the area to the restaurant took about five minutes and the six of them were quickly seated. Meeting the parents was never something that Anthony was good at, but Sarah made it easy for him. Her parents asked him about Canada, playing for a hockey team and what life was like being someone who could be recognised frequently. Her brothers asked about what he spent his beefy, their words not his, paycheck on, how he was looking after their younger sister and the one that Sarah physically stopped Anthony asking, how often did he pick up girls on the road.
“Shut up and eat your pizza,” Sarah scolded her brothers for even thinking of asking her boyfriend about his previous escapades. She didn’t want to think of Anthony in that way and she hoped that he didn’t have eyes for anyone other than her.
Aside from this question, Anthony felt like a member of the family and could tell that they all wanted him to genuinely be a part of the family. They got along like a house on fire and Anthony loved the dynamic between the siblings, they were able to chirp each other much better than anyone on the ice could. Simon or Steven could say something, but Sarah always had a much better comeback than either of them were prepared for. He was happy that he integrated into the family so quickly and couldn’t wait to bring Sarah home to Quebec.
Dinner finished up and Anthony refused to let Sarah’s father pay the bill, however much he insisted that Anthony was a guest of the family and didn’t need to foot the cost. Eventually, the older man caved and said that he would leave a tip on behalf of everyone but Anthony was allowed to pay for the dinner. As Anthony went to the bar to pay, Sarah’s father whispered in her ear, “don’t let him get away, he’s amazing.” Sarah blushed, the compliment wasn’t even directed at her but at someone else she cared about. Anthony fitted seamlessly into their family dynamic and it made Sarah realise; she was in love with Anthony.
“Thank you for having me tonight,” Anthony spoke to all members of the Milkins family. “I hope you have a great Christmas and I hope to see you all at another game soon.”
“It’s been a pleasure having you tonight, Anthony,” Mr Milkins said as he shook Anthony’s hand once more. “As for the hockey, tell us a time and place and we’ll be there.” He let out a hearty laugh as he let the other members of his family say goodbye to the young couple.
Anthony watched as Sarah embraced both of her parents, reminding them that she and Rebecca would be over at 11 am to open presents with them, and opened his phone to call an Uber to her apartment complex. It was a short wait for the two, once the Milkins’ had left them, and this time Sarah made sure that she was wrapped up for the New York winter.
Sarah had wanted to invite Anthony to the celebrations that her family were having, but she thought that it would be slightly too early. They both shared what they were doing in the car to her apartment. Apparently, Mat was going to attempt to cook himself and Anthony a roast ham but were both prepared to go to the Martin house in case everything went wrong. So, Sarah knew that she expected to see photos of them with the Martin family because there was no way in hell that either of them would be able to make food. Sarah was going to drive across to her parents’ house, with Rebecca in the passenger seat singing Christmas songs. It was going to be like every other Christmas. They’d have turkey because that was what her father’s family always did, they were British, open presents as soon as all members of the family were there, and end the day by playing an obnoxious number of board games.
It made Anthony think about his future, would he want to go back to Quebec or would he go to New Jersey? Would he spoil every family member he had? How about the food, would it be a fancy meat in the centre of the table or would they just decide to eat something they usually ate? It didn’t even cross his mind that Sarah was in every single one of the plans because it felt right for him to include her. There wasn’t anyone else who he wanted to include in a family occasion, it would be crazy for him to think that anyone else could be in her position.
The car slowed to a halt and both Anthony and Sarah jumped out of the car. He followed her into her house so they could share their Christmas wishes with each other. No gifts were being shared as they were meeting up on Boxing Day to exchange gifts, even though Sarah was adamant that she didn’t need him to buy anything because she had everything that she needed. Anthony said the exact same thing, but both of them knew that the other had bought gifts. It was basically impossible for them not to buy gifts for the other because they both wanted to show how much they appreciated one another.
“Have a good Christmas day baby,” Anthony said, bringing Sarah into a tight hug as the pair stood in her hallway. “Don’t eat too much turkey and drive safe, yeah?”
“You got it,” Sarah replied, looking up into her boyfriend’s eyes. “Mom will probably give me a load of leftovers that I can cook on boxing day?” Anthony nodded and agreed that it would be a super simple idea for them to do and would be an easy lunch for them both to pick at as they shared gifts. The two of them stood in the hallway for a bit longer before Anthony checked the time and realised that he should probably head home so that his girlfriend could get a decent amount of sleep before driving. He called an Uber for himself back to his place and kissed Sarah a few times more before the honks from his car got so frequent that she pushed him out of her front door. She waved at him as his day started to drive away.
Christmas Day at the Milkins house was chaotic, to say the least. Sarah and Rebecca arrived just before 11 am and there was excess wrapping paper covering lampshades and on almost every soft surface. Sarah’s younger cousins were running around the house, causing havoc as usual, and both of the girls found refuge in the kitchen along with the other adults. Most of the adults had an alcoholic beverage in their hand, but both of them decided that if one of them wasn’t going to drink, the other wouldn’t drink either.
Gifts were exchanged, non-alcoholic beverages were drunk by the girls, and a lot of food was consumed. Turkey, roast potatoes, vegetables, pigs in blankets, nut roast, gravy, cranberry sauce. You name it, it was on the long, beautifully decorated table. The children pulled crackers with each other and the flimsy paper hats rested on their heads. Laughs filled the house and Sarah was enjoying herself until one of her aunts asked her a question.
“So,” her aunt started, “where is this big hockey shot of your boyfriend?” Sarah wanted to let out a loud sigh and roll her eyes, but the entire room had gone silent, expecting an answer from her imminently.
“Anthony is back in New York, spending time with his housemate and is going to call his family later,” she replied, hoping that people would understand that she didn’t want to talk to her extended family about her very new relationship. Her aunt didn’t seem to understand her tone and continued to question her.
“But, you haven’t had a relationship ever. Why do you think that dating a hockey player is a good idea? Are you dating him for his money? Because I saw the contract that he signed,” Her aunt pushed.
Sarah watched her parents’, her brothers’ and Rebecca’s eyes widen at this comment. Anyone who knew a shred of knowledge about Sarah knew that she would never date anyone for their money, she wasn’t like that. She was dating Anthony because she enjoyed being in his company, he filled a hole in her heart that she didn’t even know was there. Sarah was dating him because she loved him. There didn’t need to be another reason.
“I am dating Anthony, because he is a lovely person to be around and I enjoy spending time with him,” Sarah replied sternly. “There doesn’t need to be another reason.” Sarah placed her fork down on the table and took a large gulp of the apple juice in her champagne glass.
Her aunt understood that she didn’t want to take any more questions about her boyfriend and Sarah picked up her fork again, stabbing a potato forcefully. The tension in the room was present and no one knew how to cut it, except for Sarah’s mother. She noticed that most people had already finished their food and asked Sarah and Rebecca if they wanted to help clear and the girls agreed quickly.
Sarah’s mother apologised profusely for the behaviour of her sister, but the medical student told her mother that she didn’t need to apologise for something that she didn’t do. It was up to Sarah’s aunt to apologise if she felt it fit, it was no one else’s responsibility but her aunt’s.
The tension was eased with Christmas pudding, cheesecake and a plethora of other desserts. The family resumed their comfortable chatter that only occurred at events such as Christmas or Easter. Rebecca and Sarah were some of the first to leave after the games were played, stating that neither of them wanted to drive in the snow whilst it was dark, which everyone understood. They chatted about the behaviour of some of the family members, purposely excluding that one aunt because it wasn’t something that either of them wanted to discuss. It was a comfortable atmosphere, and both were glad because it was the most at home either of them had felt all day. It wasn’t that they didn’t enjoy the day, because they did, it was the number of family members that neither of them were expecting to see. They arrived home safely and once they had lazily strewn their gifts on the couch, they both called it a night and headed to bed. Sarah was looking forward to Boxing Day as Rebecca needed to go to work so she and Anthony would have the apartment to themselves.
A loud knock on the front door of Sarah’s apartment started her as she drank her morning coffee. She was expecting Anthony to arrive a bit later so was slightly unsure of who could be at the door, but she was positively surprised by the sight of her smiling boyfriend behind the door. Anthony pulled Sarah into a hug and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Joyeux noël mon amour,” he whispered into her hairline. He had missed her on the main day of festivities and hoped that her mother had given her some leftovers as Mat was able to make something for Christmas Day, but it was a bit of a disaster.
“So,” Sarah had to compose herself as she was laughing, “you’re telling me that Mat put a ham in the oven for 10 hours and didn’t check it once?”
“It was worse,” Anthony continued with the story, “he didn’t even want to go to the Martin house so we just made a stirfry and ate it whilst watching Elf.” Sarah had to control her laughter because she didn’t want to disturb any of her neighbours. Anthony shuffled over to sit next to Sarah and pulled out a small bag that she hadn’t noticed until just then. “I know you said no gifts, but I couldn’t not get you something.”
“Baby,” she groaned but moved slightly to find the bag that she had prepared for him.
“So, I’m not allowed to get you anything, but you’re gonna get me some stuff?” he moaned, rolling his eyes.
“I don’t care,” Sarah stated, passing the small bag across to Anthony. He handed her a small bag, filled to the top with crepe paper and she responded with a roll of her eyes.
“You first,” Anthony, well, he tried to suggest it but it came out a little more forceful than he hoped. She made her way through the obnoxious amount of paper, throwing a small amount across the couch to hit Anthony until she made her way to a small box. It was a dark blue jewellery box, from a place that Sarah had never heard of but looked incredibly fancy. She carefully opened the box, revealing a bracelet with a charm attached. A heart, with the date they started dating. Sarah lifted her head and met eyes with Anthony. She couldn’t believe how beautiful it was.
“Do you like it?” he asked, slightly nervous that he hadn’t picked something good.
“Anthony,” Sarah replied breathlessly, “it’s beautiful.” She lifted the bracelet out of the box and offered her wrist to Anthony so he could put it on for her. Although she could put it on herself, she thought that it would be nicer for him to do it. He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles before unclasping the bracelet and caressing the soft skin of her wrist. Gently, he placed the jewellery over Sarah’s wrist, then after he clasped it closed, he kissed her wrist.
“Ma chérie,” Anthony gasped, trying to keep his emotions in check. His girlfriend, who he loved even though he hadn’t told her yet, was wearing a gift from him. He did take a lot longer than he thought was necessary to find something that he thought was perfect. “It looks perfect on my perfect girl.” He lifted Sarah’s knuckles to his lips and kissed them softly.
“How am I meant to top that?” Sarah sighed, still looking into Anthony’s eyes. She passed him his gift and he pulled out three neatly wrapped gifts. He started with the smallest one and opened it to find a set of three ties with matching socks. Sarah claimed that he needed to up his tie game on game day and this was her way of solving that issue. The medium-sized one was a new leather wallet with a matching Airpods case. Anthony’s wallet was falling apart and he had to use an elastic band to hold it together so that he didn’t lose cash or his cards. He thanked her profusely because it was something he genuinely needed a new wallet. The Airpods case was something that he also needed as his current case was absolutely filthy and Sarah refused to even touch his set when they were watching something together.
The final box was slightly larger and he opened it to find a classic style radio. Sarah knew that he wanted something nice to have on his workbench to show off when his mother came to visit and this connected to AM/FM along with Bluetooth capabilities which he absolutely loved. Anthony struggled to be in the kitchen, even when he wasn’t cooking, without music so to have something like this was perfect for him. He pulled her into his lap to thank her with a kiss but it immediately became heated. Their tongues danced around each other and both of his hands found their way just above the swell of her butt, staying at a respectable distance from crossing her boundaries. Sarah’s hands didn’t know where they should be placed, they moved from around his neck, to on his abs and ended up settling with one around his neck and the other resting on his bicep.
Anthony tested the waters by moving one of his hands to cup her butt cheek and resting it there without doing anything else. She didn’t complain so as they continued to kiss, he gently grasped the soft flesh, allowing Sarah to moan into his mouth. “Shall we move this to the bedroom?” Anthony asked and Sarah responded with a nod.
#ahockeywrites#anthony beauvillier fic#anthony beauvillier story#anthony beauvillier imagine#anthony beauvillier#nhl fic#nhl imagine#nhl writing#hockey fic#hockey imagine#hockey writing#islanders18#ociasg story
72 notes
·
View notes
Text
Make Me a Fool - T. Barrie
Summary: Sofia is tired of going on dates with the wrong guys - when a meet-cute with Tyson turns into only friendship, will she ever have anything more than that?
Word Count: 7.2k
Warnings: meet-cute, fluff, pining, friends to lovers, some bad language
A/N: this is my first OC in a published fic! (I have another in a WIP). Thank you to @danglesnipecelly and @itsbadgerbadgermushroom for their encouragement in trying this 😘 and also tagging @texanstarslove and @broadstbroskis for just genuinely being sweethearts 💚
~~~
The Dating World hadn’t exactly been an easy ride for Sofia. No matter where she met guys – whether it was through dating apps, blind date recommendations from mutual friends, or even that cute guy she met at the coffee shop – every single one had turned out to be no good. They were all wrong for so many reasons, whether that was a playboy with multiple girls on the go, a guy who was only actually after sex, someone that was so self-centered that she barely got a word in edgeways, or there was simply no spark.
And it wasn’t like she didn’t want these dates to work – Sofia loved love. Her parents had met in high school and had been together happily in love ever since. Sure, she knew that was rare, but to her they were absolute couple goals. All she wanted was to love someone and be loved in return, just like her parents loved each other. Was that really so much to ask for?
Sofia certainly didn’t think so.
Another Friday night alone rolled around, and the only thing Sofia wanted was to get a pint of ice-cream and watch some sappy movies. Maybe while giving herself a pedicure and wearing a facemask. Who didn’t love a pamper night? So with her wavy brown hair piled on top of her head, blue eyes scrubbed free of make-up, and wearing her glasses instead of her usual contact lenses, Sofia headed out for her ice-cream. There were a fair few people in the grocery store when she arrived including one guy by the ice-cream freezer. Huh, a very cute guy. Luckily she was still wearing a bra. No, not the time. She was here for ice-cream, and ice-cream only.
As she walked up to him though, Sofia noticed that he seemed to be desperately looking for something – a specific flavour? – but with no luck. Yep, there was the desperate whimper of frustration. Time to step in; this was her territory.
“You okay there bud?” Sofia asked, frowning.
The guy flinched slightly but turned to face her with a frustrated expression. Oh wow he was beautiful – square jaw, gorgeous brown eyes, big broad shoulders, thick arms…and those curls! Wait, no, focus.
“No, I’m not. I just moved here for work and everything is shit and I just wanted my favourite flavour ice-cream but they don’t have it and I just…ugh!”
The guy trailed off, running a shaky hand through his messy curls. Oh wow, she hadn’t been expecting that. Nevertheless…
“Sorry, you didn’t need to know all that. It’s just been a really bad week,” he grimaced, trying to force a smile.
Poor guy. Well, she could definitely relate to comfort eating after a bad week, that was for sure. So Sofia smiled kindly back, shaking her head. “Please don’t apologise! We all have shitty weeks,”
The guy laughed, but it still sounded a little broken. Time to step up her game.
“Maybe I can suggest an alternative? I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m a regular at this particular freezer,” she said, wearing a hopeful smile.
This seemed to crack a genuine smile. “Sure, be my guest,” he nodded, “I’m Tyson, by the way,”
Well it was a start. “I’m Sofia. Nice to meet you!”
Tyson smiled shyly at her, seeming a little hesitant.
Sofia dramatically rolled her head from side to side, stretched her arms over her head and bounced a few times on the spot as if warming up, earning an outright giggle from Tyson, making her grin at him. Much better.
“Okay, cherry vanilla sweetheart is okay, banana toffee treat is a weirdly interesting combination, I’m a huge fan of the fudgy chocolate brownie, and the caramel swirl is to die for. But my absolute favourite is the peanut butter chocolate heaven. If you like Reese’s chocolate, then you’ll love this one,” she listed, pointing to the different shelves.
What? Sofia took her ice-cream seriously – there was nothing wrong with that.
Tyson looked a little stunned, but that quickly turned into a brilliant smile, making Sofia’s breath catch in her throat. “The peanut butter chocolate one sounds pretty good actually. Exactly what I need,”
“Happy to help,” Sofia shrugged, trying to play it cool as she passed him a carton of it, as well as grabbing one for herself.
“Hey, um….”
Sofia looked up at Tyson as he trailed off, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. What?
“This is a kinda weird to ask, and I swear I’m not a creep, but I’m new in town and I really don’t know the best places in town to get ice-cream from so-”
“Would you like my number?” Sofia asked, trying not to giggle at his rambling, “for ice-cream related emergencies?”
Tyson’s smile seemed to dim slightly, but he nodded so Sofia figured that was what he wanted to ask her. That was what he wanted, right?
“Yeah, exactly,” he murmured, “I could really use a friend,”
Sofia hoped her smile hadn’t dimmed as well when she passed her phone to him. Friend. Why did that feel weird?
When he passed her phone back with his saved number in it, Sofia sent him a quick message of ‘Hey, it’s Sofia :)’, earning a smile from him as his phone lit up.
“I’ll see you again soon, ice-cream friend?” he asked, voice full of hope.
She couldn’t help but to giggle, nodding her agreement. “Yeah I’d like that Tyson,” she said, smiling at him.
If he wanted friendship, then she could and would give it to him.
*
The friendship that blossomed between Tyson and Sofia was genuine and sweet. He’d texted her the next morning, just a picture of the empty carton and a thumbs up – and she laughed as she sent back the exact same thing. And from there they were texting pretty much every day, Sofia getting to know exactly how sweet and kind and caring Tyson was. They started hanging out in person too, coffee runs and lunches and late-night dinners, to the point where they had a standing movie night (with ice-cream!) every Friday when Tyson didn’t have a game – and hadn’t that been a surprise, finding out that he played in the NHL. He had admitted that ice-cream wasn’t even remotely in his diet plan at all, but Sofia obviously wasn’t going to tell anyone – and besides, Tyson deserved a cheat treat every now and again, especially with how hard he was working and playing.
Over less than two months, Tyson quickly became one of her best friends. He was just so easy to talk to, and he knew exactly how to make her smile when she was having a bad day – not to mention how amazing his hugs were. And she knew that she was a huge support for him in his new city. She always answered the phone while he was on roadtrips so he could hear a friendly voice, never judging for anything. Sofia knew that she gave him a break from the intensity of his hockey life. She just…liked him, okay? He was such a good person, and really quite her ideal guy – but he only wanted and needed a friend, so that’s what she was determined to be for him. He deserved that much at least.
A few more months passed into their friendship, and it was a week into the New Year where their Fridays lined up perfectly, so Sofia was on her way over to Tyson’s with a couple of bottles of decent white wine. He was supplying the ice-cream this time, but damn it she needed the wine too. Yesterday night she went on her third date with a cute guy she’d been really hopeful about, but, well…
“He said what?” Tyson gasped, his jaw dropping.
“That he wanted to fool around before we went any further, and if I didn’t want to then he couldn’t see a future for us,” Sofia groaned.
“Please tell me you kicked his ass to the curb,” Tyson scowled.
“You’re damn right I did,” Sofia grumbled, taking a big gulp of her wine.
Tyson took a big gulp of wine in solidarity, staring at her with his big brown eyes wide with disbelief. But then Sofia couldn’t help but sigh.
“Why do my dates always end up going so badly? Is there something wrong with me?” Sofia asked, pouting.
Was there? Had she been the problem all along? But Tyson immediately shook his head.
“No, absolutely not,” he said firmly
As much as the conviction in his words made her heart skip a beat, she sighed again.
“Tyson…”
“Nope, I won’t have you talk about yourself like that,” Tyson interrupted, frowning at her, “These guys you try to date are the problem, not you. Ethan…Easton…Evan…whatever his name was, you are worth so much more than that. You’re kind, funny, smart, caring and beautiful, and any guy would be lucky to have you in their life,”
Any guy, huh? Sofia felt tears spring to her blue eyes, so she quickly wiped them away, but not before Tyson saw.
“Hey, c’mere,” he murmured, beckoning her towards him.
Sofia shuffled down the sofa willingly, curling into Tyson’s side and slumping her head against his chest. She immediately relaxed as his arm wound around her waist.
“It’s okay to be a romantic, yeah? It’s not a bad thing that you want to genuinely fall in love. I know I do,” Tyson said softly.
Of course he wanted to fall in love as well. Of course.
“Thanks Tys. I don’t know what I would do without you in my life,” Sofia sighed, squeezing his hand where it rested on her hip.
Tyson just hummed his agreement, pressing a kiss to her wavy hair, making Sofia smile sadly. Of all the guys she couldn’t have, why did Tyson have to be one of them? She couldn’t see Tyson’s sad smile in return though.
“Ice-cream and 10 Things I Hate About You?” Tyson asked.
“Yes please, I need Heath Ledger in my life,” Sofia nodded, sniffing as she sat upright.
Tyson laughed, wiping her cheeks dry of the tears she didn’t know had fallen. “There, still beautiful,”
Why did he have to make things so difficult?
*
Love was a funny thing. It could be fleeting, passing like a ship in the night, or even all-consuming, like a wildfire with no hope until it burned out on its own. The more time that Sofia spent with Tyson, the harder she fell for him, and the harder it was for her to pretend that she was okay just being friends. No matter how many first dates she went on, how many guys she hoped to move on from him with, nothing worked. The very first moment they’d met when she’d gone out of her way to make him laugh as she recommended him ice-cream, she knew she was done for. But how could she tell him how she felt? He’d literally asked for her phone number to be his new friend in a new city, nothing more. And there was no way she was ruining the incredible friendship that they’d built between them, not a chance. There was no way she could feel anything but empty if he was no longer in her life, and she couldn’t risk losing him. She wouldn’t.
But she didn’t know what to do.
What Sofia didn’t know was that Tyson felt exactly the same. The moment he’d met her, he was gone. She was beautiful – that much was obvious as soon as he saw her – sparkling blue eyes, that amazing wavy brown hair he always wanted to run his fingers through, and the warmest most genuine smile he’d ever seen. But it was her heart that dazzled him on that first night – instead of walking away from his crazy mid-breakdown frantic self, she’d offered to help him and made him laugh. She’d gone above and beyond to make him feel better, and he’d never met anyone like her before. Like an idiot though, he’d completely messed up asking her out on a date, and instead she’d given him her number to be his friend in this new city. Only his friend.
Hell, he knew she wasn’t interested in him romantically – she went on enough dates to show him that he didn’t stand a chance. How could he? He knew he was nowhere near good enough for her as a life partner. Even though he’d told Nate (wonderful oblivious emotionally-useless Nate) how hopeless he felt in their weekly phonecalls, Nate kept telling him to take a chance on Sofia, that Sofia would feel the same as him, Tyson knew Nate was wrong. But there was no way he could give up having her in his life, no matter how much it hurt him to be second to those stupid guys she dated. So he did his best to be the absolute best friend she could possibly need, no matter how hard it was.
Tyson only wished she could see him as more.
*
“Oh god, why did I drink so much?” Sofia groaned.
Tyson giggled as she slumped against his front door as he closed it, just about able to kick her heels off her feet. “I told you not to do shots with the Swedes, but you didn’t listen,”
Sofia whined, not wanting to admit that he was right. Even though he was right. Tyson smiled fondly at her, shaking his head as he kicked off his own shoes.
“I just wanted your teammates to like me,” she grumbled.
“They already do, sweetheart. They love you as much as I do,”
Tyson froze at the words that spilled from his lips, his heart skipping a beat at the smile that spread across her lips.
“Sweetheart?” Sofia grinned.
Tyson let out a shaky breath. The deep blush that spread across his face made Sofia laugh, a little giddiness rushing through her body along with the alcohol.
“Let’s get you some water,” Tyson grumbled.
Sofia just laughed again, skipping along behind him to the kitchen. It had been a last minute invite to drinks with his team this Friday night (she’d initially hoped to save the Friday night for a second date with a guy from Hinge that she had been hopeful about, but their first date on Tuesday had been so dry and dull), but Sofia had still had a brilliant time. She knew that Tyson knew that she had been disappointed with her date this week, so it had been really sweet of him to invite her out to cheer her up. And he’d even called her sweetheart! A girl could dream, right? Tyson kept his back to her as he reached for a glass in the cupboard and pulled out a jug of filtered water from the fridge, but Sofia just hopped up on the island counter to watch him, happily swinging her legs.
She’d had a great evening with one of her favourite people and now she was still hanging out with him – what more could she want?
“Here, why don’t you drink this while I get you something comfy to wear?” Tyson murmured, breaking her out of her thoughts as he pressed the cold glass of water into her hand.
“Thanks Tys,” she said, smiling, “you’re the best,”
He smiled shyly at her, still blushing slightly, before he left the room to get her some clothes. Sofia sipped on the water as she waited to Tyson to return, still swinging her legs with a smile on her face. She knew she probably shouldn’t have had so many shots tonight, but it had just been such a fun atmosphere. Sofia definitely wasn’t the only one drinking that much (at least, she wasn’t the guy that had to be carried out to an uber) – and she knew that Tyson was watching out for her, so she knew she was able to relax and just have fun. He made her feel safe, that she could just be herself without worrying, and tonight at the bar she’d had an amazing time.
The hangover tomorrow would be worth it.
“Okay, some comfy shorts and a tshirt for you,” Tyson announced, walking back in the room, dressed in sweatpants and an old tshirt now instead of his nice shirt and jeans.
“Ooh gimme,” Sofia grinned, hopping off the counter.
Tyson smiled fondly at her, taking the glass from her hand in exchange for the clothing. Then she frowned at him, earning a frown back. “What’s wrong?”
“The zipper on this dress always sticks and all the vodka will not help – will you unzip me?” Sofia asked, eyes wide and pleading.
Something inside her was telling her that this was a stupid idea, such a stupid thing to ask, but the remaining alcohol coursing through her veins drowned that out. But when Tyson just stood there in silence, his mouth slightly open and his eyes glazed, she felt a niggle of doubt start to creep in. What was she doing, asking him to unzip her? Stupid.
“Forget it, I’ll just stay in this dress,” Sofia mumbled.
“No!”
Sofia flinched at his shout, making him wince.
“I’ll unzip you, it’s fine,” Tyson insisted, “turn around?”
Sofia nodded, biting her lip as soon as her back was facing him, swallowing heavily as she heard him take a shaky breath. She jumped slightly as his fingers brushed the top of her spine, unable to stop her heart beating faster as he slowly unzipped her dress. What had she been thinking, asking him to unzip her? Now she’d never forget the feeling of him standing so close, the touch of his fingers on the small of her back, no matter that she was still a little tipsy.
“There, all done,” Tyson said, voice a little shaky, “I’ll go put a movie on, yeah?”
Sofia just nodded, watching in silence as he walked away. Damn it. She took a deep breath, letting her dress drop to the floor with her eyes briefly closed, before shaking herself out of it and quickly unhooking her bra, dropping that to the floor too. Once she’d pulled on his clothes over her panties (even his laundry detergent smelled amazing), she dumped her discarded clothes onto the kitchen counter and headed into the living room to join him. He’d turned off all but one floor lamp, leaving the room with a low glow, nice and cosy. Tyson looked up at her with a smile, settling her nerves. Whatever, it had just been a weird moment, that was all.
“Pretty Woman?” he suggested.
“Sounds good to me,” she nodded.
He lifted his arm, making her grin and sit down, snuggling into his side, kicking her legs up next to his on the ottoman.
“Comfy?” he murmured, wrapping an arm around her waist.
“Yeah, press play,” she nodded, settling into his hold.
~
It can’t have been more than 30 minutes before Sofia felt a little heavier in his arms, so Tyson looked down – sure enough, Sofia was fast asleep in his arms. He swallowed heavily as he watched her peaceful face, mind flashing back to the kitchen moment earlier. Unzipping her dress had felt so intimate, especially when his fingers touched the small of her back, and now she was lying in his arms? How was his heart supposed to cope with this? This was everything he wanted…and it wasn’t real. It wasn’t going to last. But…surely it wasn’t a bad thing if he just let her continue sleeping? She looked so sweet, so cosy, and he didn’t want to disturb her. So instead, he just switched the movie off, tossing the remote onto the coffee table before snagging the blanket off the back of the sofa and gently throwing it over the two of them. Their legs were already kicked up on the ottoman after all; he could sleep like this. Luckily she’d already been wearing her glasses tonight rather than her contacts, so at least he didn’t have to worry about waking her up to take them out – he just gently pulled them off her face and tossed them to the other end of the sofa. No point in waking her up. He pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head, relaxing back into the cushions, and closed his eyes.
He could pretend for one night, right?
~
Sofia blinked her eyes open slowly, groaning as she (blurrily) saw that it was 5am from the clock on the wall. They hadn’t even turned off the floor lamp…but the tv was off and there was a blanket over her. Over them. And Tyson had even taken off her glasses for her. Oh wow. She’d fallen asleep on Tyson, and he hadn’t moved her? She lifted her head from Tyson’s chest, looking at his sleeping face with a soft smile. He was so handsome, wasn’t he? Her heart ached a little at the gentle expression on his face, soft and kind even in sleep. Wow. And it was so nice being held in his arms, the two of them having shifted a little to curl around each other in their sleep, her arm over his waist with both of his around her. She could stay like this for a little longer, right? He was so warm, and it just felt so right…
She could pretend for one night, right?
*
The next few weeks following the sofa-sleepover weren’t quite as smooth and easy as Sofia had hoped. It’s not that it was particularly awkward, oh no, and there definitely wasn’t a bad vibe between her and Tyson…it was just different. Something felt different between them – she didn’t know if it was because she knew what it felt like to sleep wrapped up in his arms, or the fact that he had demonstrated (even more so than usual) just how kind and caring he truly was, but it was something. And she knew Tyson was the same, because every now and again he would get a strange expression on his face before he shook it off and carried on as usual with a smile.
She couldn’t put her finger on it, and it was frustrating as hell. It was almost like being in limbo, that weird stage that wasn’t quite friendship anymore, but definitely wasn’t anything more. And Sofia was getting so tired of it. She knew she was going to have to tell him sooner rather than later – things were too off for her not to. Because at this rate, she was just going to make herself devastatingly miserable, and she had more respect for herself than that. She wasn’t a fool, and she wasn’t going to start acting like one now.
It was going to have to be all or nothing. But damn if that wasn’t the scariest thing Sofia had ever felt. And she had put it off every time she’d seen him since that night, unable to speak the words that would change everything. It was just so hard, faced with the potential of losing him for good. She hadn’t even been on any dates at all over the past few weeks, unable to even think of anyone that wasn’t him, which was so outside of her usual self that even her colleagues had noticed.
Speaking of…
Tonight she was out at a bar with some of her friends from work. It wasn’t a big weekend booze-up, just a casual couple of drinks after work mid-week – Sofia was only planning on having a couple of glasses of wine as she was heading out to dinner with Tyson afterwards. All she knew was that he had a phone call scheduled for something to do with his work, so they’d decided to meet at the bar first before heading out for food. Sofia was all glammed up though, contact lenses in and blue eyes surrounded by a subtle smoky-eye, with a cute new little black lace dress hugging her curves. She’d gotten ready in the bathrooms at work with a couple of the other ladies she worked with (they were staying out for drinks after she left) so at least she wasn’t the only one. She felt beautiful, the confidence shining through in her smile, and she knew she’d turned heads as she walked into the bar with her colleagues.
Maybe tonight was the night. Hah. Maybe not.
“And another glass of Sauvignon Blanc for you, Sofia!”
Sofia smiled as her friend passed her the new wine glass, nodding her head in thanks. She needed to stay out of her thoughts, wary of being lost in them, especially as she was seeing Tyson tonight. Clear, focused and confident. That’s what she needed to be. Not pining and mopey. No, that wasn’t good at all.
“Oh, hey, isn’t that your boy?”
Your boy. Hah. If only.
She spun around to where her colleague was indicating, unable to stop the smile that spread over her lips as she saw Tyson. Waving to get his attention, Tyson did a dorky wave back before he walked over.
“Hey, sorry I’m a little late. You look amazing,” he murmured, wrapping his arms around her in a hug.
She blushed slightly as she hugged him back, squeezing his waist even with her wine in her hand, before letting go.
“Thank you, you’re too sweet! And it’s really not a problem. I did just get a new glass of wine though,” she said, lifting it in indication.
Tyson laughed, shrugging. “I’ll get myself a beer too then, and we can head out after?”
“Sounds good to me!” she grinned.
Tyson grinned back, walking over to the bar in question. Sofia turned back to her colleagues, several of whom were grinning widely at her, but she just rolled her eyes, shaking her head and earning a few pouts.
“Don’t you dare say anything,” she warned.
A couple of them held up their hands in surrender, making her laugh, but another frowned over at something over Sofia’s shoulder.
“Maybe you should say something,” her friend said, jutting her chin in the direction of the bar.
Sofia turned around again, to see what the hell her friend was talking about, before she froze, her breath catching in her throat. Tyson was at the bar…talking with a pretty blonde woman. That, that didn’t mean anything, right? It wasn’t like they were…oh, there it was, the woman brushed her hand up against Tyson’s arm, giggling at something Tyson said while he smiled down at her. Of course a beautiful woman was flirting with him, and why wouldn’t he flirt back? It wasn’t like he had anything or anyone tying him down. It wasn’t like she had any claim to him herself. It wasn’t like Sofia had ever told him how she felt.
And now she was paying for it. Was she really too late? After all this time? Feeling her smile slip, Sofia turned her back on Tyson, forcing her smile back on her face for her colleagues, who were all just staring at her in pity.
“Please don’t,” she begged, taking a deep breath, “clearly I lost my chance,”
“He’s already walking back over, that was just flirting!” one of the girls insisted.
But Sofia just shook her head, taking a big gulp of wine. She was going to need it. That woman was beautiful, blonde and buxom just like every hockey WAG stereotype. And she was definitely not – so maybe this wake-up call was what she needed. No matter how much it hurt.
“Hey, sorry I took so long, service was slow,” Tyson said, apologising as he slipped back in next to her.
Lie. But it was okay, it wasn’t like she wasn’t aware.
“No worries. Cheers!” Sofia said, raising her glass.
Tyson frowned slightly at the fakeness of her smile, but lifted his pint glass to clink with hers anyway. Sofia just took another big gulp of wine.
After that, as hard as she tried, she couldn’t break herself out of that edge of sadness. The evening was tinged with it now, like an ice grip over her heart. Seeing him flirting with that woman was the kick up the ass that she needed – there was a reason that she and Tyson were just friends.
But even though she tried to keep up a happy façade, she knew that Tyson saw through it, even when they’d left and were eating in the restaurant he wanted to try. He would pause every now and again, a little confused expression on his face, which only broke Sofia’s heart a little more. He knew her so well, but he still didn’t know this. And now she didn’t even know if it was worth saying anything – she looked nothing like the woman he’d been flirting with, so what was the point?
Soon enough, their dinner was over (not that Sofia could say what she’d eaten or what they’d talked about, only that neither of them drank anything alcoholic), and Tyson was driving them home.
Oh, he was driving them to his apartment. Not what she’d expected, but she would roll with it. Nothing they hadn’t done several dozen times before. She could hold herself together a little longer.
“So, the food there was really nice. I’ll have to recommend it to some of the guys,” Tyson said, smiling as he unlocked the door.
“Definitely!” she nodded, shutting the door behind them, “although I’m pretty sure none of them will be going for dessert like we did,”
Tyson made a shushing noise, pressing her finger dramatically to his lips, making her laugh as they walked into the kitchen, sitting down on the stools at his kitchen island. Her laugh trailed off slightly as her heart clenched again, realising how comfortable and how right this felt between them. Why couldn’t this be easy? Why couldn’t things just be easy for her for once?
“Hey, what’s going on?”
She looked over to Tyson as his soft question brought her out of her thoughts.
“What do you mean?” she asked, forcing a smile onto her lips.
“There,” he frowned, “That. That fake smile, you’ve been doing it all night,”
Ouch.
“Have not,” she muttered.
“Yes, you have! You were fine when I first met you but as soon as I came back with a drink, something had changed. What’s wrong?”
Why did he have to be so perceptive? He was a hockey player for fuck’s sake. Why did he have to notice this now?
“It’s nothing Tys. I’m fine,” she said firmly.
Tyson rolled his eyes, making her purse her lips together. “I can tell when you’re lying, Sof. You’re clearly not fine. What happened? Was it something I said?”
“No, it wasn’t something you said,” she said sharply.
“Then what’s wrong? Because it’s clearly something!” he asked, his voice raising louder in frustration.
Ugh, for fuck’s sake.
“Why can’t you just drop it?” she snapped.
“Why won’t you just tell me?” he shot back.
Sofia groaned, throwing her head back. “Maybe it’s personal and maybe I don’t want to tell you,”
“What did I do to make you not trust me? We tell each other everything and now there’s something you can’t say? Won’t say? What the hell Sof-”
“I like you!”
Oh god.
Oh no.
As Sofia tried to breathe, there was one thing she noticed more than anything. Tyson was frozen, his mouth open in shock – and he hadn’t said a word. Sofia laughed at his silence, a little wet with imminent tears, a lot broken, and shook her head. What was a little more heartbreak, right? It’s not like she could take it back now.
“No, you know what? I’m pretty sure I love you. But that doesn’t matter, right? Because you haven’t said a damn thing a-and I knew this was going to be the reaction you gave me, which is exactly why I haven’t said anything before. So now you know – I have feelings for you, and…and you clearly don’t have feelings for me. I think I’m just going to go,”
She still hesitated though, as she pulled her phone out to order an uber. 2 minutes away. But Tyson opened and closed his mouth, eyes frantic but voice silent. And that was all she needed to know. Uber booked. Goodbye Tyson. Sofia left his apartment with a heavy heart, slamming the door closed behind her, tears prickling at her eyes as she ran to the elevator, but she pressed her lips together in an attempt to control herself. She’d told him how she felt, and he hadn’t returned her feelings. She’d put herself out there, all for nothing. And that’s all there is to it.
She could wait until she was home to cry.
If nothing else, she was lucky enough that by the time she reached the bottom of his apartment building, her uber had arrived, so she hurried in quietly, resting her head against the window. The driver seemed to realise that she wasn’t in the mood to chat and just put on some soft music, making her heart clench even more as her mind replayed the last 10 minutes.
She’d finally told Tyson how she felt.
Tyson hadn’t said anything.
Nothing at all.
And he definitely hadn’t tried to stop her leaving.
What more of an answer did she need?
*
Sofia woke up with a heavy heart, feeling like every part of her body was aching. She felt empty, completely drained, just as she feared she would if...no, when she lost Tyson. There was no going back now. There was nothing else she could do. Her friendship with Tyson was over, and fuck that hurt so much. He was such a big part of her life…what was she supposed to do without him?
She barely managed to shuffle from her bed to her kitchen before she started crying, hands shaky as she made her morning coffee. This was her own fault, she knew that. But that didn’t make it hurt any less. So she just let the tears fall, the pain of her heart breaking flooding through her body. It couldn’t have been more than 20 minutes until she finished her coffee, but it felt like hours, her head throbbing and her eyes stinging, her cheeks tacky with tears. She couldn’t carry on like this. She couldn’t waste her day, her life, like this. What was the point in that?
Sofia hated feeling pathetic, feeling weak, especially over a guy (even if that guy was Tyson), so she took a deep breath, wiping her cheeks dry with her fingers. “No more. Suck it up,” she muttered to herself.
Her breath shook as she left her coffee mug in the sink for later, her hands still shaking a little too, but she stood a little taller, trying to convince herself that everything was going to be okay. Because it had to be okay. It had to. There wasn’t any other option.
But as she went to walk towards the bathroom to take a shower, the door buzzer rang. What the hell?
“Who is it?”
“It’s me,”
Holy shit. Oh god. Tyson?!
“What are you doing here?” she asked shakily, her voice cracking.
“Please will you just buzz me up?”
Oh god. Should she? She couldn’t just leave him outside, right? This couldn’t be happening. What the hell was he doing here, after last night?
“Please Sof? We need to talk,”
Well, fuck.
She bit her lip, before pressing the buzzer, allowing the building’s front door to open. She knew she had less than minute before he would climb all the stairs and knock on her front door, so she quickly ran to her bedroom, scrubbing her face with a make-up wipe and running a brush through her hair. That was better than nothing. She whipped off her ratty old pyjamas and quickly pulled on some clean panties, some sweatpants and a baggy sweater, at least making herself look casual rather than like a slob.
Then she heard three knocks on the door. Damn it.
Sofia quickly shoved her glasses on her face, taking one last glance at herself in the mirror before walking as calmly as she could to open the front door. Sure enough, Tyson was standing there, looking the most nervous she’d ever seen him. Well, at least she wasn’t the only one feeling affected.
“Can I come in?” he asked softly.
She just nodded, letting him walk past her before shutting the door behind him. Sofia bit her bottom lip, wringing her hands together, before she took a deep breath. This was her home. She was in control here.
“So, you didn’t answer my question,” she said simply, “what are you doing here?”
Tyson let out a whoosh of breath, running a hand through his messy curls. He looked…well, he looked exhausted, if nothing else. Like he’d barely slept. Much like her. Wow. What was he…
“I came here to apologise, Sofia,” he finally admitted.
“Apologise? For what?” she asked, forcing a smile.
“Stop. Please stop,” Tyson said, his eyes full of sadness as he stared her down, “you know you don’t have to pretend with me,”
Well, fuck.
“What do you want me to say, Tys? I’m trying to patch together a broken heart here,” she said, her smile now wobbly. Damn it. She wasn’t going to cry again. She wasn’t!
“But I don’t want you to patch up a broken heart!” he blurted.
Sofia’s breath caught in her throat, her mouth going dry. What was he saying?
Tyson swallowed heavily, looking down at the ground before looking back at her, his eyes shiny but steady.
“You make me a fool, Sofia,” Tyson murmured, “every time I think I’ve got my head on straight, you spin me around. I always feel like such an idiot around you, always messing up. Just like last night, when I just froze up like a fucking statue instead of telling you how I feel. The thought of you not being in my life, even just overnight, is too much to bear. I can’t be without you,”
What?
He…what?
Tyson saw her hesitation, but didn’t dare stop talking now that he’d started. And Sofia couldn’t find any words to say at all. So Tyson licked his bottom lip nervously, before taking a deep breath. Here goes nothing.
“I should never have let you walk out of my front door last night. I should never have let you go without telling you that I love you too,”
Sofia whimpered, hand flying up to cover her mouth as tears filled her eyes. He loves her too? He…loves her? Tyson bit his bottom lip, stepping forward to rest his hands on her shoulders, desperate for the contact.
“Please tell me you still love me? Even though I acted like a fool? Even though I hurt you?” he said softly.
She immediately nodded, tears finally trickling down her cheeks. “Of course I still love you. These feelings aren’t just going to disappear overnight,”
Tyson smiled, his eyes a little watery too, but he leant down to press a gentle kiss to her forehead, making Sofia whimper again before slumping into his arms. He slid his hands from her shoulders to wrap his arms fully around her, her hands rising up his back to clutch at his t-shirt.
“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry,” Tyson whispered.
“It’s okay,” Sofia said, her voice muffled into his chest.
“No, it isn’t. You weren’t okay last night and I pushed you and pushed you, and then acted like a complete asshole,” Tyson muttered.
“You weren’t an asshole! I…I was so sad last night, before we left the bar for dinner. It killed me to see you flirting with her, that beautiful blonde woman while you ordered your drink,”
There. There it was.
But Tyson just huffed a laugh.
“That was nothing. She meant nothing. And now you know how I feel every time you went out on a date with one of those stupid guys,” Tyson mused, “you go out on so many dates!”
Sofia blushed slightly, thunking her head down on Tyson’s collarbone, making him laugh.
“I haven’t been out on any dates at all since we fell asleep on the sofa,” she grumbled.
“Yeah,” Tyson said, his voice much more serious now, “I noticed that. And it gave me hope,”
“Hope?” she asked softly, looking up at him.
“Hope that maybe it wasn’t just me that had feelings,” he explained, smiling.
Sofia smiled shyly back at him, before biting her bottom lip. Tyson noticed her hesitation, and unwrapped his arms from her, leaving one hand linked with hers. Sofia blushed slightly at the contact, as silly and simple as it was, making Tyson smile again.
“C’mon,” he urged, tugging her towards him lightly.
She followed Tyson through her own apartment until they reached the sofa in the living room, the two of them sitting down next to each other. Her heart beat a little faster as he turned to face her properly, but she tucked up her legs to face him too, her knees brushing his thighs. This felt different. This felt so different.
“Hey,” he murmured.
“Hey,” she laughed.
Sofia looked down at where there hands were still joined, Tyson just running his thumb over her knuckles in response. Why were they being so weird about this? No, she needed to know what he wanted. It couldn’t be any worse than last night, that was certain. She could do this.
“So what do you want here, Tys?” she asked softly.
Tyson smiled. She was so much braver than him, twice now. “I want to call you mine, Sofia. And I want you to call me yours,”
Sofia’s breath caught in her throat, but her lips spread into a brilliant smile. Yes. That was…that was everything she wanted. And he was just offering it to her on a silver platter? Really? Well, she wasn’t turning this done, no way in hell.
“I think I could get used to calling you my boyfriend,” she said, not hiding an ounce of her happiness.
Boyfriend. Wow.
Tyson’s smile spread into a grin, the giddiness spreading through his face, making her laugh. “I can’t wait to tell Nate that you’re finally my girlfriend,”
Sofia snorted. Of course Nate would come first before his family. “Is there going to be an I-told-you-so in there?” she mused. She wouldn’t put it past Nate to do so.
“Oh yeah he’s never going to let me live this down,” Tyson nodded, “especially with how I treated you last night,”
Hey, no.
“Water under the bridge, Tys. We’re sorted now, right?” she said firmly.
“Yeah, of course we are,” Tyson grinned, giving her hand a squeeze.
He was finally hers. And she was finally his. Fuck that felt so good.
“There is one thing though,” Tyson said, breaking her out of her thoughts.
“Oh yeah?” she said, frowning.
What?
“Can I kiss you?” he asked shyly.
Her frown melted into a smile, earning a smile back. Instead of answering, Sofia leant her head up, Tyson meeting her in the middle to press their lips together in a gentle kiss. Oh wow. Oh wow oh wow oh wow. She pulled away with her lips tingling, Tyson looking just as dazed as her.
“Kiss me again?” Sofia asked breathlessly.
Tyson grinned.
#my writing#tyson barrie#tyson barrie fic#meet cute to just friends to lovers#all the pining you could ever want#tyson barrie x reader#tyson barrie imagine#tyson barrie fanfiction#hockey writing#hockey fic#hockey imagine#nhl fic#nhl writing#nhl imagine
203 notes
·
View notes
Text
Fic writer questionnaire! Tagged by @deputychairman, thank you!
1) How many works do you have on AO3?
65....just waiting for 69 so i can celebrate
2) What's your total AO3 word count?
288,609
3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
okay, so, there's a lot so we're gonna collapse some. So, 16: The Witcher (games and show), Supernatural, Dark Angel, Glee, Stargate (both SG1 and SGA), MCU, Vampire Diaries, Teen Wolf, due South, DC (comics and movies), House of Leaves, Sense8, Harry Potter, Les Miserables (book), Doctor Who, and X-Men movies. Oh, and I wrote a lot of NSYNC RPF back in the day but you will never see it. (Unless you literally read it back then and remember one and want to reread it, I’m not ashamed of them if you were also in the pit with me. If that is the case feel free to ask.)
4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
all some children do is work: this one surprised me, i did NOT think there was this kind of appetite for almost-gen turned-into-a-kid fic, but i do really like the fic itself so i'm contented with its acclaim
method: i mean, it's fake dating, written back when there wasn't much non-modern-AU fake dating in witcher fandom (possibly there still isn't?) so, not surprised
Emergency Pants: this is the one that the Claw chose back in 2012 bc i had written very pornographic tony/bruce about a month after Avengers came out so there was a big appetite for it. i don't much care for it these days except i do still think the tony voice is good
warm you like the sunshine: deeply unsurprised this one is popular (and it's one of my own fics that i reread a lot), it's extremely tender BDSM with a juggernaut pairing, that gets the readers
As often as from thee I go: honestly kinda surprised about this one, which is just a 2500 word confection i wrote for my own satisfaction, but it does have explicit sex and jaskier crying about his feelings so maybe it makes sense
5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
I almost always do, but usually just with "Thanks!" unless it's a detailed or lengthy comment.
6) What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?
"Long black night, morning frost" (Les Miserables) for absolute certain. One of the very few fics I've written with an outright unhappy and pessimistic ending (although I found it very cathartic to write). For Witcher fics, "Kind" and "go ask alice" are about as sad as I get.
7) What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?
Almost all of them, honestly. There's a point in happiness of endings where you really can't distinguish degrees. Probably the most--not saccharine, but distinctly Happy Ending-ish is either "Water like a stone" or "Darling, if you only knew," which to my eternal shame are both Glee fics. In terms of Witcher fics...it's still hard to pick! I think the kidfic trilogy ended very, very happily; I think "If you live through this with me" ended TOO happily.
8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've written?
I do not, and I don't read them, at least not since the days of the late 90s/early 2000s when I once read a really good Highlander/X-Files crossover (oh, and Martha's cosmic horror fic where Stargate and Angel and I think something else all cross over but it feels quite natural and right). I don't like fusions, either, most of the time.
9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Never! In 20 years! I've been extremely lucky.
10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?
ahahahahahahahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
yes...yes you could say i write smut. on occasion. you know, when the urge comes on me. i write mostly kink or at least kink-adjacent fic, but i've done some vanilla scenes too, and i write m/m and m/f and (occasionally) f/f. fun fact, my only rimming scene to date was in a f/f/f threesome!
11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of.
12) Have you ever had a fic translated?
I think so? I can't remember, honestly, which sounds dreadful but like...I don't READ the translation, because I am sadly monolingual, but I get a burst of delight when someone asks to do it (or to make a podfic).
13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I have tried--me and a friend once got like 12k deep into a co-written Tiger and Bunny fic--but it doesn't really work out for me. I am a massive control freak when it comes to writing and absolutely miserable to work with. (Although I wasn't so bad back when we wrote the T&B fic, we just sort of never got around to finishing it. Which is sad, because it was GREAT.)
14) What's your all time favorite ship?
Max/Alec from Dark Angel. I shipped it when I only started watching DA for Jensen's episodes, I shipped it when I fell in love with Max, I shipped it when I frantically hand-wrote notes about the fic I wanted to write, I ship it right now as I'm typing, I will ship it in my grave. Also it's not a het ship bc neither of them are heterosexual, thank you very much.
15) What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?
I only post finished fics, but in terms of things I haven't posted, I still think my "For A Good Time Call" fem!jaskier/yennefer(/geralt) AU would have been truly incredible. If you haven't watched that movie go watch it immediately so you can share this beautiful idea with me.
16) What are your writing strengths?
Ohhh, this and the next one are hard, because I truly don't know. Well, besides "porn." I am genuinely good at porn, which is HILARIOUS considering how many more sex scenes I've written than participated in. But overall, I have so much angst and neurosis and tenuous self-worth tied up in writing, I'm a very bad judge of my own skills. Also, it depends on the fandom! In some fandoms I'm good at dialogue, in others not so much. In some fandoms I'm good at pastiching the tone of the source and in others...Not So Much.
17) What are your writing weaknesses?
If I had to pick a weakness, though, I'd say concrete imagery/detail. Like, the things that characters are physically doing either out of emotional reaction or just, they're doing something in that scene. Dialogue is usually easier (not sure if it comes out better, but it's easier).
18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I used to be mildly annoyed at it but! Now! On AO3! You can put a footnote by the French or whatever, so the reader can jump down to read a translation and then jump right back up. I now feel that if you choose to include dialogue (or any words) in another language from the rest of the story, this is the only acceptable method.
19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?
I remember vaguely in 1996 or so writing a couple pages of Kit whump for the Young Wizards books. I wrote some execrable nonsense in X-Files, but in my defense I had just turned 13. I don't THINK I wrote anything for Star Trek, which was my first fandom. Oh, and I attempted to write fic for Homicide, which I watched in 7th and 8th grade and lied about my age to get onto the good mailing lists (they were actually the bad, racist mailing lists, I would later realize, but again I was 13).
20) What's your favorite fic you've written?
Sorry to disappoint anyone who follows me for Witcher content, but it's either "The absolute absurdity of end-series items" (House of Leaves) or "A quite unlosable game" (Dark Angel). They are both Big Idea fics, and I feel like in both of them I got the Idea across brilliantly, and I'm truly proud of them and think they're the best things I've ever made. (In terms of Witcher fic, it's the kidfic trilogy for sure.)
I am not going to tag anyone because that always makes me mildly anxious, but if you read this and you want to do it you can say you were tagged by me! :D? :D?
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
❝The New Toy❞ hhj ― m.
― summary:
y/n is frustrated because she lost her job, her best friend jeongin helps her and organizes a job interview with the ceo of the biggest marketing company. mr. hwang gets a lot of interest in you and ends up introducing you into the company and then later on introduce you into his playroom.
hyunjin/female reader | ceo!hyunjin | suggestive | 1.5k
↬ content warnings: bdsm, breath play, fingering
a/n: yes this was a request that I kinda expected and so this is the first part (introduction), and in some days there will be a second part with the smut stuff. I would love to make a series/au out of this
→ blogs masterlist
→ The New Toy Pt. II
“Come on, Y/N. You can give it a try. This job could make all of your financial problems go away. You need this, please at least go to the interview.” My best friend Jeongin said.
Homeless and jobless. The situation of my life at this point is completely fucked up. About 2 weeks ago my life was like every other: student, a part-time job at a café and with no worry at all. But since my father died, the income was 0. My school was not paid so I dropped out and the life I had was a 180. About 2 days I couldn’t afford the rent and here I am homeless and living with my best friend Innie.
“I can’t, this company is nothing for me. So why even try?” My voice shaking and close to tears.
“He really doesn’t have a good reputation, but I tried hard to talk to my brother and he is open to get you this job as his first secretary.
“I appreciate your support about this but Hwang Hyunjin the boss, CEO and biggest asshole of whole Busan. I can’t take this one job.”
“Why? It’s just a job, an answer and an opportunity for you. A big opportunity!” he whined.
With a deep sigh, I rethought everything and nodded slowly.
After a long day of getting myself ready and praying it wouldn’t be that bad. A black pencil skirt and a white blouse, my hair in a ponytail, and a little touch of makeup.
“Mr. Hwang is now ready to meet you, follow me.” A young and very beautiful woman, probably in her mid-20s. She was very serious and looked intimidating. If this is the kind of person they are looking for I couldn’t make it in this job.
I stumbled after the lady and made my way to the big office. Behind this door will be an opportunity, an answer may be the answer to all the problems. The young woman opened the door and there he was, the boss of the company, the CEO of the biggest marketing agency. Hwang Hyunjin. In his early 20s the heir of Sir. Hwang who died in a fatal and tragic heart attack, about 2 years ago.
His aura gave sent shivers down my spine and made the hair of my body stand straight up. The secretary left me alone, helpless and scared of how intimidating a young male could be.
“Please come in, Miss Y/N” he said his voice soothingly deep. Raspy and soft at the same time.
I walked in and closed the door. While doing so I say a little prayer that this will be ending soon.
“Have a seat, Miss.” His hand gesturing at the seat in front of him and then I scanned the whole room, from the big windows that covered the wall which showed the skyline of Busan. To the big black office desk. The room is kept in black and white, very fancy and serious.
“ So my brother told me you wanted a job here, tell me a little about yourself. What qualifications do you have?” His gaze hypnotizing me into a trance. His big brown eyes digging into my eyes, looking straight in my soul. I couldn’t answer but after a little while, I stuttered.
“I am organized and can take responsibility. I can work a lot and more than other people and I can keep private life from business. I am honest and straightforward. I-I can work good with people and know how to calm angry/ rude customers.”
“Okay good and how about your private life?” He stood up from his black chair and walked forward to the edge of the desk in front of me. His crotch was dangerously close to my face. He took my breath away and I answered quickly.
“What do you want to know, Sir?” I asked quietly.
“Are you in a relationship?” His head tilting to the right exposing jawline, I didn’t dare to look at him. Kept my eyes on the ground. It can’t be possible to be that intimidated from someone; well you haven’t met Sir Hwang yet.
“N-No, Sir.”
“Good and how about your experience of working?”
“I only worked at a coffee shop as an employee. I am used to working for more than 8 hours a day.”
“Would the job of personal assistant be something for you?” His eyes scanning my whole body, from the hair to the stilettos I’m wearing. He clearly had a problem with my hair and leaned over.
His hands opening the clip and releasing my black hair. His face lighting up into a small but genuine smile.
“I’m sorry, but I couldn’t help myself.” He purred out.
“N-no pro-probl-em, Sir. And yes, the position o-of pers-personal assistant would be go-good…”
“Great, Great. I will see you on Monday, Miss Y/N.”
“Y/N is okay, I mean just Y/N. No Miss, Sir.”
“Well, then Y/N l will see you on Monday. 9AM, don’t be late.” His voice sharp and direct, but smooth like honey.
My hands shaking, seeing his hand move a strain of hair that was in my face. Effortlessly giving my skin a slight burn, where he accidentally touched my cheeks.
“I-I won’t be late, I-I promise.” I stuttered again, helpless and intimidated by his closure of my face. Goosebumps and uneasy breathing are the results of his intense gaze.
He took my hand and helped me stand up on my feet, which was a bad idea. Not only was he mentally messing me up, but he also gave my knees the feeling of jelly. My knees gave up on me and I quickly fell to the ground.
He took no second thought and helped me up on my feet again. How humiliating this is, I am not even working here but I fell in front of my future boss. I hid my face and quickly said goodbye while running away from Mr. Hwang.
My hair completely messy, my skirt wrinkled, and stilettos making a sound with every step. His signature smile appeared and with a little headshake, he sat on his seat again. He thought to himself.
“What a sub...”
“Sir, please. m-more.” A moan escaped my slightly parted lips. My eyes blindfolded and my core throbbing for friction. He continued to whip my sore ass, his actions getting harder. He whispered in my ear, his voice so deep and so close to me.
“You want more, huh? Beg for it. My little slut.” My heartbeat doubled and my hips automatically went up for another hit. His big and veiny hands held me steady as he pressed me down. He started something in me, a side of me I never thought existed. A wild side, an erotic adventure.
“Good Morning, Sir.” I said while knocking and coming into his office. The scent of Vanilla and Rum filled the air, his cologne was absolutely messing me up. My knees getting weak after seeing a little smile appear on his beautifully full lips. My imagination went through me and I didn’t realize him snapping his fingers in front of my eyes. His face way too near to mine.
“Vanilla…Rum…” I whispered.
“What?” He asked clearly amused with me being dumbfounded.
“Your cologne, I like it.” My voice breaking after that sentence, he played a game with me. And I was willing to play.
“So, you like it, Y/N?” He came even closer, inches away from my face, starring down on me like a prey ready to eat his dinner.
“Y-Yes, smells good. I like it. Me liking you.” Oh no… Here it was my Yoda state. For years this didn’t happen, ever since I had this crush in 7 grade. Oh lord Jesus christ make it go away. I prayed and prayed but he just continued to smirk at me, moisturizing his lips with his tongue. I could not look away, even if I tried my hardest...
“Tell me what is it about you? You completely fascinate me. The perfect sub, you always look down and never even dare to look into my eyes, you make yourself even smaller than you are when you’re around me. You can’t stop pressing your thighs together, signaling that you are needy. You didn’t even say one word when I opened your hair yesterday. So obedient, so willing... I don’t think I can control myself any longer.” he whispered so lightly and softly.
Caressing my cheek slowly while looking into my eyes deeply. His slender fingers softly caressing my cheek, looking into my eyes. Coming dangerously close to my face to the point where he closed his eyes. His face inches apart from mine, electric waves making their way all over my body. And what seemed like 5 seconds was in slow motion, after a whole eternity I felt his soft and plump lips on mine.
The kiss was hot and needy, it was very touchy. His hands roaming my body, his hands were everywhere on my chest, on my arms, on my neck, on my hips, everywhere. A hot feeling surrounding me with lust. I tugged at his hair and pulled him closer. He groaned loudly into my mouth, a low and raspy broken groan. He stopped the kiss and looked into my eyes.
“You will regret ever meeting the devil, angel.”
He smirked, taking my hand and getting me out of that office of his.
#Stray Kids#SKZ#Stray Kids Hyunjin#SKZ Hyunjin#Stray Kids Hwang Hyunjin#SKZ Hwang Hyunjin#Stray Kids Smut#SKZ Smut#Stray Kids Hwang Hyunjin Smut#SKZ Hwang Hyunjin Smut#Stray Kids Hyunjin Smut#SKZ Hyunjin Smut#KPop Smut#KPop#K-Pop Smut#K-Pop#Hwang Hyunjin CEO#Stray Kids Dom#SKZ Dom#Stray Kids Hwang Hyunjin Dom#Stray Kids Hyunjin Dom#SKZ Hwang Hyunjin Dom#SKZ Hyunjin Dom#SKZ Hard Hours#Stray Kids Hard Hours
383 notes
·
View notes
Text
Chemical Reaction (19/22)
Summary: Though their chemistry class is now over, the chemistry between James and Rose is just getting started. Together, they navigate the highs of new love and the lows of coping with past trauma to forge deep and unbreakable bonds of love and commitment. Part 2 in the Catalysis series. Tagging @doctorroseprompts
This chapter: ~7400 words, teen
If you like my stories, consider leaving me a tip? I know these are trying times, but if you are able, I would really appreciate it xoxo. And as always, comments and reblogs are very much appreciated as well.
AO3 | FF | TSP
Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | Ch4 | Ch5 | Ch6 | Ch7 | Ch8 | Ch9 | Ch10 | Ch11 | Ch12 | Ch13 | Ch14 | Ch15 | Ch16 | Ch17 | Ch18 | Ch19 | Ch20 | Ch21 | epilogue
James couldn’t believe his eyes. He blinked hard, thinking his exhaustion had caught up with him. No, the blonde woman on his porch had to be the night-shift nurse who lived across the street—she often liked to indulge in late-night baking on her nights off, and there were times she would come to James for an ingredient she was missing, or to give him a small sampling of her confectionery creations.
(He had the sudden, jarring, embarrassing realization that she may have been flirting with him the whole time… Is that why she hasn’t come around in months?)
“Rose,” he said again when blinking stupidly for at least ten seconds didn’t transform Rose into anyone else.
“Hi,” she said quietly. She looked exhausted; there were prominent shadows beneath her eyes and her shoulders drooped like a heavy weight sat upon them.
Her gaze flicked over his shoulder, and her face fell. “Oh. Sorry. Didn’t realize you had company. I’ll just…” She thumbed behind herself to the dark road. How did she get here? “Sorry.”
Before he could protest, Jack clapped James on the shoulder and announced, “No, no. I was getting ready to head out. Come on, get in out of the cold.”
Jack pressed a smacking kiss to James’s cheek, then muttered, “Talk to her,” into his ear. He then stepped forward and gave Rose a loose hug and kiss on the cheek before he walked to his vehicle that was parked on the side of the street.
They turned to watch Jack start his car and drive off into the night. James looked at Rose, then at the squarish plastic Tupperware container she held. She was absently flicking her thumb nail across the tab on the lid.
“What’ve you got there?” he asked, nodding to the container.
Rose chewed on her bottom lip and pushed her hair behind her ear. “Well. We’ve been playing a game all month, haven’t we? Time to celebrate.”
She popped the lid off the container and handed it to him. In it were half a dozen large, muffin-sized chocolate cupcakes, frosted in vanilla icing and decorated with pink and yellow star sprinkles. The words “Happy Birthday” were written in small, neat, glossy red letters across each cupcake. His stomach sank.
“It… it’s your birthday?” he croaked. Of course—of fucking course—today had been her birthday.
Rose nodded. “I… I didn’t want to let my entire birthday pass without spending some time with my favorite person.”
James nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. “Hope you had fun.”
Rose raised an incredulous eyebrow, and the penny dropped.
“Me?” he squeaked, the knot in his chest loosening.
“Yes you, you numpty. Just because I’m angry with you doesn’t mean I stopped loving you. Do you not love me anymore because we fought?”
James’s knees weakened at the ‘l’ word. He took a step towards her, the arm not holding the cupcakes extended. Her face softened and she stepped into his proffered embrace. Her body was warm and solid against him. Heat prickled behind his eyes as he wrapped his arms as tightly around her as he could without upending the Tupperware container.
“I’m sorry, Rose. I’m so sorry. I…”
“Can we not do this on the front porch?” she asked, voice muffled. “S’cold.”
James was loath to let go of her, but he had to agree the night was getting frigid, especially for him, with his bare feet and thin pajama bottoms and t-shirt. With a sigh, he gave her a final squeeze and dropped his arms from around her waist, then stepped back to usher her into his home.
She toed off her shoes by the front door, and he could already predict her questions when she angled her head towards the hallway. “Did you paint something?”
James scratched the back of his neck. “Er. Yeah. Started repainting my bedroom.”
A small, sad smile tugged at the side of Rose’s mouth. “Needed something to keep your mind busy?”
“Something like that,” he admitted.
A more genuine smile crossed her face as she gestured to the Tupperware container he was holding. “Y’know, stress baking would've been cheaper.”
James blinked, then gaped down at the cupcakes he was holding. The font of the words was perfect cursive, the spread of the icing uniform and even. He blurted, “You made these?”
“Thanks for that vote of confidence,” she drawled. “Yes, I made them. Well. Elsa helped. She came over to my flat this afternoon. Bit of a girl’s night. Had pizza and wine, then made cupcakes. She’s actually really good at decorating; she’s got this whole set of frosting tips to make fancy designs. She did the lettering.”
“They look lovely. Very professional,” he said. He jutted his head to his kitchen, motioning for her to follow. She did, her quiet, shuffling footsteps falling into rhythm with his.
Rather than go into the kitchen, Rose peeled off to the living room, where Merry and Pippin were lounging on the sofa together, half-asleep. James watched her squat down in front of the cats and give them a bit of love before she returned to him.
“Should Jack have driven himself home?”
James glanced at Rose and saw her pointing to the kitchen table, where the mostly-empty bottle of wine sat. It had a few mouthfuls left.
“It was only half-full when we started,” James answered, picking up the bottle and hurriedly drinking the last of the wine. “This was from last weekend, when you and I… Anyway, he had one glass. I drank most of it. He should be fine.”
“Tell him to let us know when he gets home safely,” Rose said.
James snapped off a lazy salute then sent Jack a text, passing along Rose’s request. He set the Tupperware container of cupcakes on the counter before grabbing two clean bowls from the dishwasher he hadn’t bothered to empty.
“Oh, I really shouldn’t,” Rose said with a grimace. “I already had one after they came out of the oven. Plus pizza. M’gonna puff up like a balloon.”
She pinched her waist, and James frowned. “What are you talking about? You’re beautiful.”
Her cheeks flamed pink and she dropped her hand limply to her side.
“I had a huge, greasy burger and chips for dinner. D’you think I’m gonna puff up like a balloon?” he asked, tilting his head to the side.
“Well, no. But you’re…” She let her sentence dangle as she waved her hand vaguely up and down his body.
“And you’re…” He mirrored her gesture. “Rose, I find you absolutely beautiful, and you losing or gaining weight won’t change my opinion. Not that my opinion should matter. If you don’t want a cupcake, or if you’re not hungry, that’s fine. And again, not that you need my approval.”
Rose sighed and twisted her hands in front of herself before she turned away from him and rooted in his freezer for ice cream he always made sure to have on hand.
“I had a minor eating disorder as a teen,” Rose said quietly, pulling out the ice cream and shutting the freezer. “Nothing too serious. I was obsessed with my weight, and was really careful with what I ate. I counted and logged calories. I grew out of it when I realized watching what I ate made me feel even worse about myself. Of course I still tried to eat healthy and to eat reasonably-sized portions, but I stopped being so strict with it. I obviously started putting on some weight, nothing too drastic, but Jimmy would often tease me and tell me to lay off the chips or whatever, because rock stars don’t date chubby girls.”
James’s ears were ringing with rage and heartbreak, and he was furious with himself for everything he had accused Rose of last night regarding Jimmy.
“Rose, I…”
“As I said, I’m fine now and I don’t really care about my weight or body image as much,” Rose interrupted, setting the ice cream on the counter in front of him. “But sometimes those thoughts pop up without me realizing it. Like they did just now.”
Unsure of how to respond, James instead took a cupcake out of the Tupperware container, unwrapped the paper from the bottom, and set it into the bowl. “Did I… did I say something wrong?”
“No. Quite the opposite, actually. You told me your opinion, but didn’t shove it in my face or try to force me to believe you. And like I said, I don’t often realize when I’m having these thoughts.”
He nodded and forced his lips into some semblance of a smile that he hoped looked supportive. He then returned his gaze to the bowl and the ice cream she’d retrieved.
“D’you want to share this with me?” he asked, gesturing to the bowl with a spoon.
Rose nodded. He scooped several large dollops of vanilla ice cream into the bowl then he went to his junk drawer. It overflowed with a random assortment of objects: scissors, several different types of batteries, notepads, pens, pencils, a ruler, a screwdriver, tape, glue, Band-Aids, rubber bands, paper clips, binder clips, thumbtacks, toothpicks, a ball of twine, a condom, a tampon, and so many other things James didn't remember throwing into the drawer.
He dug through the mishmash of objects until he found a small, half-empty box of birthday candles and a matchbook. He took out four candles and brought them and the matches over to where Rose stood at the counter.
“I would try to shove twenty-two of them into the cupcake, but firstly I don’t have twenty-two candles, and secondly, I’m pretty sure I would end up pulverizing the poor cupcake into a pile of crumbs. So use your imagination; two and two equates to twenty-two.”
He shoved two of the candles side by side into the left side of the cupcake, right before the H and B in “Happy Birthday”. The other two, he stuck into the right side of the cupcake, behind both Ys. Striking the match, he ignored the shaking in his hands as he lit the candles. He then promptly blew out the match and dropped it into the water-filled wine glass in the sink to let it stop smoking. However, Rose must have seen the tremor in his hands, because she reached over and threaded their fingers together.
“I don’t like fire,” he admitted. “For obvious reasons.”
“You didn’t have to light the candles then,” Rose said gently.
“Pfff. It’s your birthday. Can’t have a birthday without blowing out some candles. How else will you get a free wish?”
Rose cracked a small smile and squeezed his fingers. She leaned forward as though she were about to blow out her candles. James cried, “Wait!”
She pulled back with a start.
“It’s your twenty-second birthday. I would think you would remember how this goes by now,” he drawled. He then sucked in a deep breath and began to sing. “Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday dear Ro-ooose. Happy Birthday to youuuuu.”
She was grinning by the end of it, especially when he intentionally sang off-key for the sole purpose of making her smile. He’d made her cry too much in the last twenty-four hours; a smile from her was a welcome sight.
“Right. Those candles are all charged up with birthday magic. Now you can make a wish and blow,” he said, bowing and gesturing to her cupcake.
Rolling her eyes at him, Rose closed her eyes and paused for about five seconds, before she blew out a short breath, extinguishing the candles with ease. He applauded her effort, then yanked the candles out of the cupcake and extended two of them to her. They licked off the cake crumbs and icing—cream cheese, he noted with delight—then dropped them into the trash.
“Let’s eat this before all the ice cream melts,” James said, gesturing to the table. “Want anything to drink? More wine?”
“Just water.”
He grabbed two glasses from the dishwasher and filled them with water from the pitcher in the fridge before plopping down at the table beside Rose. He noticed his phone had a new text notification; Jack had replied, letting him know he was home. James relayed the news to Rose, then gestured for her to take the first bite of her birthday cupcake.
For several long minutes, they sat silently together, trading off bites of cupcake and ice cream until the bowl was empty.
“That was very good,” he praised, swiping his finger through the melted mess of ice cream and chocolate crumbs on the bottom of the bowl and licking the digit clean.
“Thanks. Elsa loves to bake but doesn't get the chance to do it as often as she likes because she lives in the dorms on campus.” Rose ran her fingertip along the rim of her glass. “When I invited her over to my flat, she said stress baking was a requirement. She didn’t know it was my birthday until we started decorating the cupcakes.”
“Do you have an aversion to people knowing it’s your birthday?”
She snorted. “No. But it just… it didn’t feel right to celebrate. Not when we’d…” She trailed off with a shrug. “All month I’d been looking forward to finally telling you it was my birthday. It didn’t feel right to tell anyone about my birthday if I couldn’t tell you.”
“I really buggered your birthday,” he sighed, chest tightening.
“Nah.” She pursed her lips. “Okay, well, yeah. But it wasn’t just you. I didn’t help. I wasn’t in the mood to celebrate my birthday today, so I kept it to myself. Anyways. Elsa knocked a bit of sense into me this afternoon. Helped put some things into better perspective.”
“I’m glad you have a friend like that to share things with,” he said.
Rose hummed in agreement. “She also called me out for being an idiot.”
James snorted. “Jack did much the same for me.” He paused, fidgeting uncomfortably for a few seconds before he blurted, “I am so sorry, Rose. I’m so sorry for snooping through your mail and reading that letter, and I’m so sorry for jumping to a conclusion that was absolutely ridiculous, and I’m sorry for accusing you of not trusting me. I’m sorry I twisted the situation and your words and actions to put the blame all on you. I’m sorry I let my own insecurities warp my perceptions of you and our relationship, and I’m so, so sorry for ever insinuating that you would want to go back to Jimmy.”
Rose was dead silent. When James chanced a peek over at her, he was horrified to see tears welling in her eyes. She blinked and they fell down her cheeks.
Sniffling, she wiped at them and whispered, “That really hurt. I thought I had told you enough about Jimmy to show you he wasn’t a nice person to be in a relationship with. And I thought…”
“You did,” James interrupted fervently. “You did Rose. You were absolutely correct in saying I had selective memory. You told me more about him than I realized. I was too caught up in my own head last night to remember everything you’d said. I’m so sorry about that.”
Rose waved him off. “Forget Jimmy for a minute. Even if he wasn’t a wanker… It hurt that you would think I would be tempted into a new relationship with someone else when we’ve been so happy together. At least, I’ve been happy.”
“I’ve been happy, too,” James said. He covered her hand with his. “I swear, Rose. I’ve been so happy with you.”
He wished he had better answers for her. He wished he could explain what had triggered him last night, explain how his brain had disregarded nearly seven months of a friendship and four months of a relationship stronger than he’d ever had before. Why had he thought Rose would be tempted by an ex-boyfriend who had treated her so horribly? Why did he have the anxiety that Rose would see through his facade and realize he wasn’t as exciting as she’d thought? Why was he so fearful she would leave?
Because everyone leaves.
The realization crashed over him with the force of a tidal wave, pushing his head beneath the water until he could barely breathe. He was drowning, fighting a losing battle against the current, about to be swept away into the sea when he was thrown a lifeline.
Rose squeezed his fingers hard, grounding him, pulling him back to the moment. His chest was tight and tears blurred his vision.
Everyone leaves.
His mother, who had thought it more prudent to attend to their dogs rather than get herself to safety with her husband and son.
His father, who had rescued him from their burning house only to leave him on the street to go back inside. James hadn’t been enough to keep his dad by his side, and so he had lost two parents that night.
His aunt, who had never wanted kids, had never expected to have kids. She pulled long hours and travelled incessantly, chasing big news stories while James pretended he was fine with being alone, while silently wishing his dad had never saved him from their house. He knew without a doubt that, if his aunt could do it all over again, if she knew then what she knew now, she never would have agreed to be his godmother when he was born. He loved his aunt, and knew his aunt loved him, but he wasn’t so naïve as to be ignorant of the fact that he had upheaved his aunt’s life, and not entirely for the better.
The friends he had left behind in the UK and never heard from again after he and his aunt moved to America. People he had known since childhood who hadn’t bothered putting in the effort to stay in touch, despite claiming they would.
His previous partners, many of whom finding ways to end their brief relationship after realizing he didn’t want to have sex with them. Time after time, he had to listen to them say it was fine that they weren’t being physically intimate—with an unspoken yet dangling between them—only to listen to them make up excuses for why they were ending the relationship. Granted, he had broken off a relationship himself a few times, but over half the time, his partner had been the one to end it.
Over and over, people came and people went, and at the heart of it, James was hardly more than a spectre, unable to be seen or heard as his heart was left broken. And yet when Rose had joined him, had taken his hand and made promises and vows that nobody ever had before, he had jumped at the first opportunity to assume she would leave him, too.
Chair legs scraped across the floor a moment before a warm, familiar arm wrapped around his waist. He turned into Rose and rested his cheek on her shoulder, breathing in her scent, the subtle tones of amber and citrus, of warmth and love and home.
Something deep in his chest cracked open, releasing the floodgates. For the past nine and a half years, he had been drifting, trying to make sense of how he could feel so alone when he was surrounded by people, able to make new friends and acquaintances at the drop of a hat. Yet there was always that disconnect, making him feel more like an outsider looking in. Like everyone else was aware of the punchline of a joke while he was left clueless.
Until Rose. With Rose it had been natural. Effortless. It was though his world had shifted into perfect focus, and at the heart of it was her. She had reminded him of what it felt like to belong, to feel perfectly at home with another person. And though he was desperate not to lose her and what they had together, part of him was holding his breath, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Yet in doing so, he had let his anxiety take control and had hurt Rose badly enough that he had nearly caused her to do exactly what he had been terrified of.
James’s shoulders shook as he wept quietly into Rose’s neck, dampening the collar of her shirt. She didn’t seem to mind. Instead, she held him closer, rubbing her hand up and down the length of his spine as he sobbed and gasped for breath.
“I’m sorry,” he rasped. “I’m so sorry for everything, Rose.”
Haltingly, through the juddering tears that cracked his voice, he explained his revelation to her. He hoped he didn’t sound like he was making excuses for himself, but he genuinely wanted her to understand the conclusion his big, stupid brain had come to.
“I let my fears take over,” he said, voice raw from crying and talking. “I didn’t realize what they were. And I didn’t realize how loud they’d gotten.”
“I understand,” Rose said quietly. “Believe me. I understand. Is there anything I can do to help you quiet them?”
James rubbed his hand beneath his clogged, stuffy nose and grimaced when it came away wet. He pulled away from Rose and stood, moving to the sink to wash his hands, then to grab a handful of tissues. He blotted his eyes then blew his nose before he sank into his seat beside her again.
“I don’t know,” he confessed. “I know this is a me problem, not a you problem. You’ve been wonderful, Rose. You and me… our relationship… it has all been wonderful. I don’t know why I was so quick to let ten minutes of screaming insecurities make me forget about half a year of loving you.”
Rose chewed on the inside of her cheek, contemplating. “If ever there’s a time those voices are getting too loud, I’d like you to tell me. Though I know sometimes they can go unnoticed. But if you realize you’re getting stuck in your head, let me know and I’ll try to help you out of it.”
James flashed her a grateful smile. “Same for you. If there’s ever a time I can help you with whatever’s on your mind…”
Rose sighed. “I need to get better about that. I’ve realized I have a bad habit of telling myself I will deal with something later, but later never actually comes.” She sucked in a big breath and blew it out again. “I’m sorry you saw that letter from Jimmy. Yeah, you were a bit of a twat for reading it and reacting like you did. But I’m sorry you were blindsided like that, and that I ignored how it made you feel. And I’m sorry for making you feel like I don’t trust you. I’m sorry I made you self-conscious for everything you’ve shared with me and that you feel like I don’t share enough with you.” She let out a sad little laugh that twisted his heart. “This is going to sound lame, but I honestly didn’t realize I wasn’t being as open with you as I thought I was. It feels like you know me better than anyone ever has, so I didn’t think to change anything. But now that I know how you feel, I want to work to be better at that.”
James shook his head and covered her hand. “No, Rose. I got caught up in my own head and in my frustration. You’ve shared more with me than I wanted to admit last night.” Jack’s words clanged around in his head. “I shouldn’t have expected the exact same level of sharing from you as I am comfortable with giving.”
“That’s not fair. I am comfortable with you…”
James cringed. “No, I didn’t mean it like that. I’m not accusing you of anything, Rose. Merely stating a fact. I’m not trying to make you feel guilty or upset, I swear. I want you to be comfortable talking with me, and forcing you to talk about things you aren’t comfortable with is counterproductive.”
“Thing is, I was always going to tell you everything about Jimmy,” Rose sighed. “When he first texted me, it sent me into a blind panic and I sorta… shut down. I wanted to take the time I needed to get into a better place before sharing it with you. But I guess I didn’t realize how long it was since he first texted me.”
James stayed silent, letting her get her thoughts together. He twined their fingers together, happy to be able to sit and touch her like this, when for many long, heartbreaking hours in the wee hours of that morning, he had been sure that he would never be able to do so again. Her hand fit perfectly in his, and he knew that he would do whatever it took to make their relationship whole again, to make sure he could hold her hand for the rest of their lives.
When Rose began speaking, he gave her his full attention and tried to keep his emotions in check. He listened to her explain how Jimmy had texted her out of the blue, having gotten her number from a “mutual friend”.
“M’still not sure who gave it to him,” Rose said with a sigh. “He never told me and none of my friends claim to have done it.”
James listened to her describe the early conversations she’d had with Jimmy, from telling him that she needed time, to working through her anxiety with the help of Elsa and a counselor, to coming to the decision to let Jimmy say his piece.
“He was very important to me at one time. He was the love of my life. He was my everything. He will always be important and special because I genuinely loved him, and like it or not, my experiences with him shaped me into the person I am today. I don’t love him anymore, and frankly don’t miss him or want what we used to have, but if this would help him and me move on, I really wanted to let him say what he needed to say.
“He apologized to me, and it wasn’t even a terrible apology. Though he did make it sound like we both were at fault, but you know what, it was better than I was expecting, so I sorta took it as a win. I figured we were done, but then he wanted to know if he could repay me for all the debts he’d left me with. I can’t remember if I told you before, but he stopped paying his part of the rent at the end of our relationship. I got so behind on those payments because I had other bills to focus on that by the time I moved out, I was six months behind.
“I refused Jimmy’s offer. Told him everything was paid off and he didn’t owe me anything.” Rose sniffled and smiled ruefully, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “You know my money insecurities. I couldn’t stand the thought that he might use this as a way to control me again. So I shut him down.”
“Good for you,” James murmured, his first words in a while. “You don’t have to go on. It’s okay.”
But Rose shook her head. “I want you to know all of this. I want to come to you when—as Elsa puts it—shit ties up my brain. And my brain has been in knots for over a month. I want to be better with being okay about my thoughts sometimes getting tangled; I realized if I waited until my brain was calm to tell you everything, I would never tell you anything. I don’t want secrets between us, and I’m frustrated with myself that I unwittingly kept secrets from you. I can’t promise I will tell you immediately when something is on my mind, but I will make more of an effort to be more open with you. I wish I’d told you all of this sooner, but I can’t go back and change how I handled this, so let me tell you all of this now.”
James nodded and brought their clasped hands to his lips for a soft kiss.
“After I told Jimmy I didn’t want his money, I thought we were done. I didn’t hear from him for a few days, but then I got a text from him, a selfie with some of our old friends. A harmless group photo. Then he started sharing news from home. Or he would send me playlists. Stupid, innocent stuff we used to. He has really good taste in music and I’m always happy to have new songs or artists to listen to.
“We started chatting a little more regularly. Not daily, but a few times a week. A few messages at a time. He shared updates about his life, told me about going to drug and alcohol meetings, financial counseling, and so on. I told him about America and school. I didn’t tell him about you, though. It’s stupid, and I should have because I don’t think Jimmy realizes I’m not single, but you’re mine.” The word sent a thrill up James’s spine, and he couldn’t help but kiss her knuckles again. “You’re mine and I didn’t want to share you with him. I didn’t want anything of Jimmy to touch you. And I wasn’t trying to lead him on or anything. Or keep him a secret from you. But all of a sudden it’s been five weeks since he first texted.
“Then he sent me that letter. It came two days ago. I cried when I got it. I never gave him my address, so I panicked that he had somehow stalked me and found me, that he would be waiting at the university for me. And I was just… so defeated. I thought maybe he’d changed. Grown up or something. Stupidly, I thought maybe we could eventually be friends. But the only thing he wanted was for me to get back together with him.”
Rose’s tears dripped down her cheeks and her breathing hitched. James wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her in for a hug. She willingly leaned into him and sniffled quietly for a long moment.
“Did you really think that was a love letter?” Rose croaked.
“Pardon?”
“What Jimmy wrote to me. Did you think it read like a love letter?”
James sucked on the inside of his lower lip. He tried to remember the content of the letter, but his memories were all tainted with the pain of their argument.
“I don’t remember enough of it,” he confessed. “I’m sorry.”
Rose lifted her bum off of her chair, reaching into her back pocket to pull out a piece of paper that had been folded into eighths.
“Here,” she said, giving it to him.
Tentatively, he took it. Rose pulled herself out of his embrace and grabbed a tissue from the crumpled pile he had brought over.
As he reread the letter, his stomach twisted into knots when he picked out several words and phrases.
I’ve found a piece of myself…
I’m not complete…
I hate the person I am without you…
…happiest of my life…
…nothing more I’ve wanted…
…(our life?)…
You make me feel like I can do anything…
I love how I feel when I’m with you…
I was scared about how much I needed you…
…something I always knew would be there for me…
I know I can make it work this time…
…enjoy your time there, while you can…
…we can work harder together to make us work…
I will do whatever it takes to make this work…
Over and over, James read the letter, his mind picking up more of the tone and the sheer selfishness in it. Everything Jimmy said was about him, about how he needed Rose, without giving a thought about whether Rose wanted or needed him. He plainly admitted to taking her for granted, and still, after all this time, he acted as though he and Rose were equally at fault for how their relationship had ended.
How must it have sounded to Rose, for him to go off on her about the letter?
“Oh, Rose,” James breathed, “I’m so sorry. God, I was a twat, wasn’t I?”
She let out a watery giggle. “Yeah, a bit.”
“Can I ask…? How did Jimmy find your address? I mean. Do you even know how he found it?”
Rose’s eyes welled with tears again, even as she scoffed. “My mum.”
“Your… mum?” That had not been what James had expected. “But… why?”
Rose shook her head. “Apparently Jimmy went ‘round the estate. Found my mum and told her we’d been chatting. Said he wanted to send me money to help cover the bills I’d paid. He said exactly the right thing—when I moved back home, my mum kept telling me over and over that Jimmy should cough up the money to cover his half of the flat and the expenses that had built up.
“A couple weeks ago, my mum asked me if I’d been chatting with Jimmy. When I said yes, I guess she assumed I knew Jimmy wanted to repay me but I was being unreasonable.” Rose’s face crumpled. “I know my mum didn’t know how badly Jimmy had treated me, and that's my fault for not telling her. But what if he’d been a murderous stalker? What if he’d physically or sexually abused me? What if he used that information and showed up alone at my flat one night and broke in and…?”
She coughed out a wracking sob and buried her face in her hands. James nearly began crying at the sight of her distress. “How dare my mum give out my address like that? I never thought she’d do something like that. My mum called to wish me a happy birthday and I told her a little bit about why you and I were fighting, and she told me she was the one who gave Jimmy my address. I got so angry with her, and she was gettin’ angry with me. I’ve spent the day crying ‘cos I was fighting with my two favorite people.”
James tossed the letter onto the table and wrapped his arms around Rose, holding her tightly to his chest. He had never been angrier with another person than he was right now with Jackie Tyler. Well. Jackie Tyler and Jimmy bloody Stone. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Rose. I’m sorry.”
“Joke’s on Mum, though; Jimmy didn’t send a single quid with that letter.” Rose sniffled and scrubbed her hands across her eyes. “I hate this. I wish I’d blocked Jimmy from the start, I wish I’d told you when he texted, I wish I’d told my mum not to talk to Jimmy. I wish I’d handled everything differently, and I wish I hadn’t gotten so upset with you last night. I’m sorry, James. I’m sorry for it all.”
James tightened his hold around her, burying his face into her neck while she wept into his. “You have every right to handle situations however you think is best. I should have had more faith and trust in you and in our relationship. I was unreasonable. But I forgive you, love. Of course I forgive you. I love you. I love you more than you can imagine, and I’m so sorry I doubted it last night.”
Rose began crying harder into his shoulder. Her breaths came out in harsh gasps as she managed to reply, “I love you too. I’m sorry for putting the doubt in your head… when you asked if I was breaking up with you and I said I didn’t know. God, I didn’t mean that. I didn’t mean it at all. I got scared too, same as you, and my brain sort of shut down because it couldn’t stop thinking of everything Jimmy had said or done in the past, and twisting it to look like what you were saying and doing. That’s something I need to work on because that’s insulting for me to imply that you’re anything like him, but I didn’t know what to do, so I pushed you out, and I’m so sorry.”
James merely held her tighter, his heart breaking at her agony, yet filling with more love for her than he’d ever felt before.
“You’re the strongest woman I know, Rose,” he murmured into her hair. “The strongest. You’ve overcome so much, and you’re working to make yourself the best version of yourself that you can be, and that’s so admirable. I am here to listen to anything you want to tell me, but I am okay with not knowing everything. I trust your judgement, and I know you’ll tell me what you want me to know.”
He continued speaking quietly, a combination of reassurances, affirmations, and words of love. She shed more tears than he’d ever seen her shed, and he shed just as many. He was exhausted and overwhelmed, and he wanted nothing more than to sleep for a very long time tangled with Rose.
When her tears finally dried, he pressed a lingering kiss to the side of her head before sitting back in his chair. He grabbed a tissue for himself and passed one to her; they noisily blew their noses and wiped their eyes.
“Well. Wasn’t that cathartic?” he said cheerfully, holding his hand out for her tissue to throw in the rubbish bin.
She chuckled. Though her eyes were red and puffy and her cheeks were splotchy, he didn’t think there was a more beautiful person in the world than her.
He washed his hands after throwing away their used tissues, then he grabbed a few more, just in case. His nose was still a bit runny, and he was sure Rose’s had to be too. He plopped into his chair with a groan.
“First fight,” he mused. “Can tick that one off the list, I suppose.”
“Was it everything you expected it to be?” she drawled, rolling her eyes.
“Admittedly it was a lot more painful than I thought,” he said. “But now we can go back to how we were, right?”
Rose paused. In the silence, his heart sank into his stomach.
“I don’t know if we should,” she said carefully, and his lungs were suddenly out of air. Her eyes widened. “No, not like you’re thinking. It’s just… everything we fought about, everything we talked about, it changed us. It changed our relationship. Not in a bad way, but it’s different now. We’re more aware of some things that we weren’t before. I don’t want to go backwards with you. I want us to go forward. Together.”
James nodded, shoulders slumping in relief. He slid his hand across the table, slipping it beneath Rose’s so her palm rested against the back of his hand. He splayed his fingers, letting hers fall between the gaps. She curled her fingers around his hand.
“You’re right,” he said, caressing his thumb along the side of her pinkie. “Absolutely, you’re right. Guess this means the honeymoon period is over?”
“Probably.” She flashed him a cheeky grin. “Hopefully we’re not over the horny hump though.”
“You’re never gonna let me forget that I said that, are you?” he whined, grimacing.
“Nope,” she said, popping the ‘p’ as he often did. “It was such a dorky thing to call it.”
He pouted. “You never complained about my dorkiness before.”
“I love your dorkiness. Doesn’t mean I won’t tease you about it though.” Her smile slipped until her face turned solemn. “I’m really glad we talked this out, James.”
He squeezed her fingers. “Me too.”
“Any time Jimmy and I had an argument, we never did this. We’d shout at each other, curse at each other, and then ignore each other and not speak for a day or so. Then we’d have angry make up sex and pretend everything was fine in the morning. I don’t want to ever do that again. I want to communicate with you and to compromise with you, then grow with you.
“Staying in love is a choice, and it takes work. It shouldn’t be hard, but it’s not easy either. We need to choose to stay in love, decide that our relationship is worth making an effort for. I want to wake up every day and choose you, to choose us, and I want to put in the work because I wanna enjoy the payoff. Because being in love with you, James… it’s the best I’ve ever felt. You make me feel like I can do anything, like pass a stupid chemistry class or tell my stupid ex-boyfriend to fuck off. I love the way you make me feel. I love feeling like I’m home whenever I’m with you. And though this home we’re building with each other might have a leaky roof every now and then, I wanna fix it with you.”
James’s eyes were burning again. How was anything even left in his tear ducts? “Oh, Rose. You make me feel the same way. And I feel so inadequate because you just waxed romantic poetry at me, but my brain has stopped working. But please know I love you with every cell in my body, and I want to keep loving you with every cell, all the way down to each little organelle contained within, every day for the rest of our long and beautiful life together.”
Rose grinned at him and leaned over to press a light kiss to his lips. They tingled at the contact, and he wanted to pull her close to kiss her again.
“You’re such a science geek,” she said.
“Well. I’ve already shown you I’m rather fabulous with many types of chemistry and anatomy,” he drawled, flashing her an over-the-top wink as he clicked his tongue lewdly.
She burst into a fit of laughter that he echoed, feeling at peace for the first time in twenty-four hours. The exhaustion of all those hours suddenly overwhelmed him. His laughter morphed into a yawn, which spread to Rose.
“I’m knackered,” he announced unnecessarily. “Will you come to bed with me? My bedroom’s a disaster, but the guest bed is made.”
Rose nodded and stood up from the kitchen table. She took their bowl to the sink and rinsed it out before leaving it there for them to clean properly in the morning. She then flicked off the light on top of the stove before she followed him through the rest of the house, locking up and turning lights off as they went.
“Can I see what you’ve done to your room?” Rose asked.
“Sure,” he said, continuing down the hall rather than peeling off into the guest room. When he got to his closed door, he warned, “It’s a mess.”
They were hit with the stench of paint fumes as soon as he opened the bedroom door. He flicked on the light, and the room was bathed in the yellow glow of his lamps.
“Love the color,” Rose said.
“Yeah?” he asked, pleased with himself that, even in his miserable, depressive state of trying to not think about Rose, he had managed to pick a color she would like.
“Mhm.”
“I have to put on the second coat. I’ll probably do that tomorrow—I’m not really feeling like going to my classes, so I’ll probably ditch ‘em again.”
“You rebel,” she teased. “If you want some help, I don’t have anything important going on tomorrow. And I don’t work this weekend. We can take a few days to finish up the painting and reorganize your furniture.”
James smiled. “I’d like that.”
“It’s a date.” She wrapped her arm around his waist and tucked her face against his shoulder. “Besides, it’ll go faster with two.”
Leaning down, James brushed a kiss to her crown then rested his cheek in her hair. “Faster with two. Better with two.” He gave her waist a tight squeeze as he kissed her again. “Better with you.”
#ficandchips#doctorroseprompts#dwfic#doctor who#ten x rose#ten x rose au#james x rose#university au#romance#hurt/comfort#angst#my fic#chemical reaction#catalysis series#chemical potential sequel
22 notes
·
View notes
Note
Could I get No. 9 with Ben Hardy in BohRhap as Roger Taylor? I'm female and use the pronouns she/her. Thank you!! 😍 Ps: also really like the numbers with 1D references 😅
Don't Blame Me For Falling [Blurb]
Note: First of all I missed writing so much like aaah and thank you for this request! I hope that you like it and that I managed to do what you expected! 💕 Ps: Thank youuuu! 😘
~~~~
Roger has always been the one. You couldn't truly put your finger on it, but your heart and soul always knew that he would be there for you in every situation. And he indeed was, since the very beginning. Since the cradle and right after the kindergarten. It always made you smile when you thought about this little boy with his blonde bowl cut running all around, holding your hand and being the girls' lover, all the girls' one of course. But at the very beginning, you didn't even seem to care about the fact that he was this popular around girls, and even boys sometimes, because you were his best friend and at the end of the day you knew that you would share your lunch while sitting on the sidewalk. And these were the best memories you had of Roger and you, the sidewalk and first the cookies, then the cigarettes when you were twelve and alcohol when you were seventeen.
But mostly first and foremost he was a drummer, and probably the face of every band he was playing in, and you couldn't blame his colleagues for taking advantage of it. You didn't mind it either, or at least you thought that you didn't. Then, he had told you that his mother wanted him to become a doctor, so he started to study in order to become a dentist, still pursuing his drumming hobby, a hobby you liked very much especially when you looked at him squinting his eyes – because he absolutely refused to wear glasses, it wasn't “rock 'n roll” enough as he used to say – and focusing on every beat and every sound he was leading. And you liked watching him play, you liked how he bit his lips while hitting the drum with all his energy, radiating a sunny light behind his drum kit and being the one everybody wanted to see and not even Freddie – the new addition to Smile – could compete with his angelic look and his beautiful eyes shining bright under the spotlight.
He couldn't blame you for falling for him, him and his laugh, his smile and everything he radiated. But you could blame him for focusing more on the groupies than on the actual gigs he was doing. As much as he loved playing music and began to hate his studies, having girls around him seemed to become his favorite hobby when their group Smile that morphed into Queen became more and more famous, attracting people from the whole town in order to listen to them. You knew it was because of the music they were playing, this organic sound that seemed to come from nowhere but was to be expected from four so different people – an art major, an astrophysics one and an electrical engineer and a dentist to be – but Roger's charm was playing a huge part in their success, at least everyone in the band seemed to think so. And you couldn't let this little crush ruin everything you had with him, because you didn't want him to break your heart as he seemed to break those of the girls around him craving for attention and for a kiss on their lips. A kiss you wanted too, but a kiss you refused to ask for.
“Where's Roger,” Brian asked as you entered the backstage with a bottle of water for them all, somehow you ended up helping them during their gigs or at least to bring him some food or water from the bar they were playing in.
“Probably found another group of girls to hang around with,” you bitterly answered as you put the bottle on the table in front of the couch they all were sitting on before sitting on its armrest.
“What's wrong darling,” Freddie asked as he put his arm on your tight with a genuine smile, “you don't seem well right now.”
There was something in Freddie's eyes that made you like him from the very start, him and his open-mindedness and the fact that he didn't hesitate to befriend you, and treat you as family because he saw that you were almost family for Roger. And you looked down at him, sighing.
“You know... Roger,” you said rolling your eyes and Freddie just pat your tight a few times.
“Unbearable little blond one, I know. I still don't know how you manage to put up with him after all these years... You must be a saint darling!”
“I wish I was,” you replied with a lighter mind. “He was always around, so I worked with it.”
“You should teach us how to survive with him,” Brian jokingly said and John simply nodded and you began to laugh.
“Is this the laugh of my favorite princess,” you heard Roger's voice coming from the door and you turned around and saw his pretty still sweaty face facing you, his eyes locked on you.
“Depends if you're talking about the blonde that was around you tonight or me,” you wittily replied with a smirk.
“Oh y/n, don't be so jealous,” he teased you and put his hands on your shoulders, resting his chin on the top of your head.
“Y/n's a saint for being your friend, honestly, she is truly a saint,” Brian repeated and winked at you as you smiled.
“She understands me better than you Brian, even if you're here for a long time, she has the benefit of the time.”
“Of the cradle and the kindergarten, and I have some pictures of Roger having a bowl cut,” you added and you felt his hand becoming a bit more tense around your shoulders and his chin leaving your head.
“No way,” Freddie almost screamed, “we absolutely need to see this!”
“Don't you dare y/n” Roger said and you turned around again, looking up at him and sticking out your tongue. “You won, you absolutely deserve my pouty face, absolutely.”
“Roger has a pouty face,” John asked, breaking his silence and making Freddie laugh.
And he proceeded to not pout, but to be salty about it instead as Freddie made fun of him while drinking some water and other things that some of the staff had brought them during the night. You promised them to help them pack their things at the end, and usually you ended up helping Roger with his drum kit, and usually it took you longer than it should because of the fun you always had with his cymbals as he was telling you to stop. But this time, you stole one of his cymbals, and began to run away in every direction, like a child, like when you were both four and he tried to catch you after you had stolen his favorite toy as you were running for your life. And there you were, both in your twenties, running around a place you barely knew, you with a part of his kit, and him chasing you in order to gather his things. You were giggling, laughing, and the others knew that your games with Roger always ended well so they only smiled when they saw you passing by.
And this time, he cornered you. Technically, it wasn't the first time, knowing that he was always the one who knew better the places where they were playing than you did. Which was pretty much obvious. You faced a wall, with your cymbal, or his cymbal instead. You closed your eyes, and sighed; you couldn't hear footsteps behind you because you knew he had stopped running and was standing behind, looking at you, waiting for you to capitulate. So, you turned around, facing him instead of the wall, with a forced smile because you knew that it was the end of your journey there. You waved at him, faintly as he began to walk towards you.
“In my defense, your honor, I was just trying to learn how to play the cymbals,” you said as he approached you with a smile and your back began to touch the wall right behind you.
“With only one cymbal?”
“I call this genius.”
He sighed, with his face really close to yours, and you blamed the hotness of the place for the redness on your cheeks. You were drowning in his beautiful eyes, as you did often but now particularly you couldn't resist them. The silence between the two of you became quite peculiar, soothing but also tense with an unknown feeling. A feeling you tried to repress for a long time. His fingertips touched your cheek delicately and you looked at him, a bit taken aback.
“I’d like to kiss you,” he whispered and your eyes became wider than the sun. “Joking… Unless?”
“Unless I'm the blonde girl,” you managed to say, with your sparkling witty eyes.
“No, like for real, y/n,” he whispered with his raspy voice and you had to fight yourself to not let yourself go.
“Like for all the other girls that you kiss after gigs, am I right?”
“What can I say, I'm just an arrogant son of a bitch,” he told you jokingly and you rolled your eyes
“Your mom wouldn't be happy to hear that,” you told him and he shrugged, “and I'm not neither.”
“I want truly to kiss you, y/n,” he repeated, “I just want to know if... I can.”
“Depends if you mean it,” you replied as you were truly about to kiss him, feeling your teeth on your lower lip, “depends if it's not only a game, like the other girls.”
“You're not the other girls, you're my princess and I want to be your prince.”
He sold it all. You dropped the cymbal as you pulled him closer by the shirt, pressing your lips against his. You had always wondered what his lips tasted like, it seemed they were made of vanilla and cigarettes and they were gentler than you thought. His hands wandered on your hips, as yours made their way to the back of his head, playing with some strokes of his hair while you kissed him, passionately, lacking air from time to time, losing yourself and everything around.
He probably was an arrogant son of a bitch, but it seemed that he was your arrogant son of a bitch.
38 notes
·
View notes
Text
Random fun fact time! Ft. OCs! (Repost because I added more/ edited a lot of stuff)
Avery -
- Sneezes like a kitten, and most of the time she accidentally uses her fire breathe when she sneezes, so watch out
- Sleeps on a rock
- Is made uncomfortable by actual dragons, it's just... too weird for her...
- Has a strange and inexplicable extreme fear of eels
- Reacts to fear by singing/humming/speaking very loudly, and also by running and screaming (basically, how markilpler acts when playing horror games? yeah that)
- At least once a week her dad has to help her brush through her hair, he says they should get it cut but she absolutely refuses
- Owns a few pairs of gloves- most of which look nearly identical. Some are for different days, some pairs are for bedtime, and some are for special occasions, but she also has some different types and styles of gloves for different events
- Loves the holidays, dislikes the weather that comes with it
- Absolutely hates people touching/messing with her tail, even if it's by accident she gets kinda mad. That's hers- don't touch it. (Emma's the only exception to this simply because it can't be avoided- although Emma does try to touch it as little as possible)
- Slightly allergic to pollen
- She has a clicking-like purr
- If you scratch under her chin she'll purr and relax, but if scratch a certain spot on her neck she'll sleepily fall over
- Adopted as an egg and raised by her human father and fairy mother
- Has a Scottish accent
- Works as a Glazier (glass blower) and makes potion bottles, also helps with making the potions, and occasionally costumer service and boring stuff like stocking/inventory
Emma -
- Plays with hoodie strings and/or hair when upset or nervous (it happens often, her hoodie strings are sorta worn out)
- She's a big fan of animals! Especially bears, puppies, and unicorns, she thinks they're adorable! When she was younger she used to like dragons quite a bit too
- She's a protective friend and big sister, and she's a little over protective over people she cares about
- Tends to read into things; if your tone or demeanor is slightly different she begins worrying that something's wrong or that she did something. She also tends to believe that no one actually wants to be her friend or wants to be nice to her, but that they're only being nice because they're afraid of her or pity her.
- LOVES HUGS!!! Absolutely loves them, hugging other giants, hugging people smaller than her, getting hugs, giving hugs, she loves hugs
- Once accidentally ate a fake candy cane decoration, off someone's front lawn, because she thought it was real gigantic candy, left out for giants (she was like four, so it made sense to her then, but she still gets made fun for it a bit by her family)
- Loves snow and winter
- Her favorite color is probably blue
- Is surprisingly good at sneaking up on people, for someone 30ft tall she's quiter than most borrowers
- Is the second oldest of five kids, her older brother Rory is 23, her younger brother Richard is 15, and her youngest sisters Aroura and Tiana are 6 and 8, and they're all pretty close
- Her dad is a size shifter, and so are Richard and Tiana, the rest of the family are giants
- She's ambidextrous
- Very cautious of her surroundings
- Hates surprises/being scared
- Bi-romantic and ace
Sofia -
- Can write without looking at what she's doing
- Only wears slip on shoes or shoes with Velcro/zippers, she never learned how to tie them, she couldn't figure out what to do with her head or look at what she was doing
- She's an artist! She likes to paint!
- Has a hard time saying "no," so when she says it, she means it
- Hates surprises and people sneaking up on her
- Has a pet python named Albert
- Probably the only person on the planet who has worse anxiety than Emma
- Don't call her "Soph" or "Sophie," and she gets mildly annoyed when her name is misspelled
- Typically uses right arm to carry head and left hand for everything else
- Has a weird sense of humor
- Has a million stuffed animals, has like 20 on her bed, but Rupert the blue bunny is her favorite
- She has an enchanted scarf that allows her to wear her head when needed, she doesn't usually use it because she's not used to it & it gives her anxiety (she's scared of the scarf falling off/being taken off unexpectedly) but she has it and uses it on occasion, mostly at home
- She doesn't let anyone else hold her head, it seriously freaks her out, her dad is the only exception, but Avery held her once for a group photo (her body took the picture)
-She loves singing and has a soft beautiful voice but is too shy to sing around anyone 🎶
- She was bullied when she was younger and doesn't like to talk about it, she already gets emotional easily and those memories hurt
- She loves Avery's jokes and has a bit of a weird sense of humor
- She's adopted, she lives with her human father (another fun fact, her dad is one of Avery's parents best friends!)
- Unlike Avery, she wasn't adopted as a baby, she was about 6-7ish when she was adopted
- Loves vegetables
- Gets embarrassed easily
- Doesn't go out of her comfort zone, she only does stuff when Avery basically forces her to
- She really likes Emma, but is also sorta scared of her sometimes, she's just scared of people and being looked at, so she can be a little overwhelming without meaning to be, it's nothing personal and she knows Emma wouldn't hurt a fly, she's just scared of people and sometimes Emma is a lot of person
- Doesn't want Emma to hold her (Emma respects it, although sometimes they work it out to where Emma can give her a gentle hug)
-Her favorite season is fall
-She loves rabbits and frogs, but won't admit she loves horses (there's a stereotype that all dullahans love horses, she won't give in)
-Hates confrontation
-Loves vanilla cake
-Hates strangers and people she's not comfortable around being anywhere near her
- Pansexual
- Sorta has a voice claim, but it's weird and sorta difficult to explain?
Andie -
- Has a French accent (picked it up from dad)
- One of my only OCs to have a voice claim
- Plays the flute
- Mean, selfish, and self centered, but somehow also a good person
- Sings sentences sometimes
- Scared of turtles
- Works as a bard/waitress at the family tavern
- Unfortunately she is heterosexual
Andy -
- Somehow didn't pick up their fathers accent
- One of my only OCs to have a voice claim
- Plates the lute
- Genuine and kind hearted, but also a bumbling moron
- Dreams of being a song writer, wants to be a professional musician
- Works as a bard/waiter at the family tavern
- Bi, but prefers women
Clementine -
- A book worm
- Likes to sing
- Practices magic, knows a few interesting spells
- Sometimes her and Avery fight over magic usage vs. potion usage (they know it's a dumb fight, but they don't care, at this point it's a joke)
- She's a white tailed deer
- She has great hearing, and is usually very aware of her surroundings
- She wants to be a magic professor as an adult
- Demisexual, pan, but prefers men
Pond-
- Elementals don't really have gender, she chooses to present as female and use female pronouns
- Can't "see," but rather senses vibrations, since she's made out of water she doesn't have eyes, but based on other senses she can get around just fine
- She can't smell either
- Doesn't care for romance
- Has 4 pet fish she keeps with her, named Karl, Frank, Phillip, and Fish
- She has a baby sister, Brook
- She's odd and can be off putting unless you know her pretty well, then her weirdness is sort of endearing
- She can tell her friends apart by the way they walk and their gestures, and of course their voices, but really has no idea what any of them look like, she knows their species and the normal traits of those species, but not much outside that
- She doesn't eat or drink
- Smart, but sorta reckless
- Sorta hard to hug :( but the others still try
Sapphire -
- Has minimal size shifting abilities, but prefers to be her true size, she loves sitting on her husband's shoulders or in his pockets (She's about 5ft in her bigger form)
- Used to be an adventurer, at one point she was a pirate
- Met her husband on one of her adventures
- Has a Scottish accent
- She has a sword her size (no it's not a toothpick or a toy or anything, she has an actual tiny sword) 🗡
- Makes potions for the shop and deals with customers
- Grew up outside of Tradeskeep, her and Kal retired from their adventuring career and settled down there
Kalvin -
- Used to be an adventurer/ mercenary
- Huge, ripped, has all kinds of scars, but his 4" tall wife is scarier than he his, he's basically a teddy bear
- Makes potions, does restocking, inventory, and doesn't as much anymore, but makes potion bottles
- Has scars/tattoos from various adventures
- Used to have dragon scale armor, he once saved a village from a dragon, but has sold it and no longer tells the story, he now claims it was a bear
- He's a great dad ❤
- Loves ale & meat, but not as much as his girls
- I cannot overstate how much he loves his family, he LOVES his wife and daughter, like a LOT, it pretty much defines who he is, he's a family man
- Met his wife while on a quest
- He used to be a nomad while adventuring and getting paid for jobs, he'd wander from town to town, until he settled at Tradeskeep and put up a shop
Ok so i know that's a lot, but it's there for anyone who's interested in all that ❤ I have other facts too, so if you wanna know any more just look around on my blog or send an ask, Q&A for OCs are open, and I'm open to art/writing requests/ideas! ❤
#toonytoodlesocs#avery trowbridge#amelia mcconnel#sofia hodges#clementine moores#pond the elemental#sapphire and kalvin#andie & andy
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Right Where You Left Me
Chapter 7 - White Horse
Stupid girl, I should’ve known
That I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairytale
I’m not the one you’ll sweep off her feet
When Hopper and Chrissy arrive at the diner, the post-game celebration is already in full swing. Every booth in the small neon-lit establishment is packed with students from Hawkins High and a few of them rise to pat Hopper on the back as he and Chrissy work their way to a table full of his teammates in the far corner.
Going to the diner after the game was a long-standing tradition that Hopper adored. There was always such a positive vibe in the atmosphere and everyone, from the jocks to the nerds participated in the festivities. He settles into a plush leather booth between Benny and Chrissy and orders himself a Coke and a plate of fries.
“Good game man!” a senior student smiles at Hopper from across the table.
“Thanks.”
“That last catch, phew, I don’t know how you do it.”
“It’s because he has me to make him look good,” Benny brags.
“Always so humble,” Hopper laughs in Benny’s direction.
The waitress returns and passes Hopper his drink and that’s when he sees her, cuddled up in the corner booth with Lonnie. She has her body angled towards the other man and she's laughing. Genuinely laughing. It bothers him. He wants to be the one making her laugh.
He’s drawn back into the conversation at his table when Chrissy links her arm through his and lays her palm over his hand. She leans into his shoulder and flirtily flits her eyelashes at him. Smiling at her, he tunes back into what’s being said, but every once and a while he finds himself looking over at the corner table.
He zones out when Benny starts rambling about his favourite plays of the game, instead opting to focus on Joyce. She was drinking a chocolate milkshake, her favourite, and twirling a strand of her hair around her finger. She wasn’t wearing the red lipstick he’d seen her wear recently, and it reminded him of how naturally beautiful she really was. He thinks that maybe, before everything fell apart, he should have told her how breathtaking she was. She deserved to know.
He watches with envy as her arm brushes against Lonnie’s and the hand located beneath Chrissy’s clenches instinctually.
He vaguely registers that Chrissy is telling a story, but he has no idea what she’s talking about. It was likely about something he’d done. He’d discovered that Chrissy loved to tell their friends about the quirky things he did when they were alone; he didn’t love that she shared intimate details of their personal life and recognized that she did it as a means of boasting about their relationship status. He’d never said anything to her about it, but he found it unnecessary and cringe-worthy.
Chrissy turns and notices that Hopper is staring across the room and tightens her grip on his arm.
“ James, ” she hisses, “are you even listening to me?”
“Of course I’m listening,” he lies.
As Chrissy continues her story, Hopper grows restless and pulls his hand from beneath hers. He stretches his arms up over his head and excuses himself to use the restroom. Alone, he makes his way down the aisle, past Joyce’s table and to the restroom. He can feel Chrissy glaring at him as he passes Joyce, but he doesn’t linger nor does he make eye contact. In the restroom, he groans and splashes himself in the face with cold water. When the water does nothing to aid his anxiety, he decides he needs a cigarette.
Hopper goes back to the table and retrieves his jacket while telling Chrissy he would be back after his smoke. She nods and continues on with her conversation with Karen Wheeler, who had joined the group and claimed Hopper's seat while he was gone.
On his way out he watches as his peers laugh and celebrate and he feels incredibly disconnected. Everyone at their table was hollering and engaged in exciting conversations but all Hopper wanted to do was head home and crawl into bed. He should be in the mood to celebrate. He should be thrilled to have Chrissy here with him, bragging about what an incredible boyfriend he was, yet, he was pouting because his best friend was here with someone else.
Pushing through the door to the diner, Hopper whips out a cigarette and lights it, allowing the immediate rush on his first inhalation to numb the way he feels.
.
.
Typical. It was absolutely typical of Hopper to order a plate of fries while everyone else ordered only soda. Not that she was watching him, she just happened to notice while she was looking around to see if she recognized any of her classmates who were at the diner to celebrate the football team's win. Only, that was a lie because she didn’t know any of these people and she’d been keeping an eye on Hopper since he and Chrissy strolled in.
She and Lonnie were sitting in the far corner of the establishment giving her a perfect vantage point and view of Hopper and his pals. Her intention was to have Lonnie drop her off at home but she felt unsettled after her conversation with Hopper and wasn’t ready to head home just yet. So, when Lonnie asked if she wanted to join him, she accepted his offer and here they were, tucked away in a small two-person booth watching as their classmates celebrated. She’s trying to focus on the story she’s being told, something about the latest car Lonnie and his father were working on restoring; she’d recently learned that he spent nearly every weekend with his father, working on restoring cars, but her attention is split between the words he’s saying and the way Chrissy has her arm linked through Hoppers.
More than anything, she wants to give Lonnie her undivided attention. He was nice enough to offer her a ride and she felt like she owed him; seeing as she was stringing him along (though he wasn’t aware of that fact). But she’s preoccupied with the words left unsaid on the field and she needs to know what Hopper’s next move will be. She felt as though she’d made it clear that the ball was in his court. The note was the first step to mending their friendship and rather than accept her offer to forget and move forward, he just had to go and complicate things, therefore, it was on him to uncomplicate them.
Lucky for Joyce, the waitress drops off the milkshakes they ordered just as Lonnie asks her a question that she only hears the second half off. She thanks the waitress and immediately takes a large gulp of her chocolate shake.
“Chocolate, huh?” Lonnie remarks. He takes a sip of his own vanilla milkshake and smiles.
“The best kind,” she states.
“Okay, don’t find this weird, but I’ve never tried a chocolate milkshake.”
“What?! You have to try,” she insists, sliding her milkshake towards him.
He takes a sip and pauses before his lips settle into a smile and he pushes the glass back towards her. “Alright. I see what all the hype is about.”
“I can’t believe you never had a chocolate milkshake,” she scoffs. She plays around with the straw in her drink and grins, caught up in the memory of one of the first times she discovered that chocolate was the best kind of milkshake.
.
.
“Why on earth did you get the strawberry?” Hopper asks.
He leans back against the booth and scolds Joyce for her milkshake selection. It was freshman year and he and Joyce had decided to check out the diner that all of the senior students went to before it got too busy with the evening crowd. The pair were sitting across from each other in a booth lining the front window. Joyce was pleasantly surprised with the homey feeling in the diner and commented several times on how much she loved the neon lights on the edges of the window.
“I don’t know, it looked good.”
“You always get the chocolate, it’s an unwritten rule of ordering a milkshake.”
“You can just share yours with me,” she suggests. With a smirk, she leans over the table and clasps his straw between her lips before he has the chance to slide the glass out of her reach.
“Hey!” he protests. “Get your own!”
“Will it really kill you to share? I’ll share mine and we can have one of each,” Joyce beams.
“Excuse me,” Hopper calls out to the waitress. “Could we get two more straws?”
“More straws?” Joyce whispers.
“If I’m sharing my milkshake with you, we’re getting two straws so that you can’t hog the entire thing.”
“I’m not going to hog the entire thing!”
“Oh really, because it’s already on your side of the table,” he raises an eyebrow and looks at where the two milkshakes are positioned in front of her.
“You put that there!” she giggles as she pushes it back to the center.
“Why would I put my milkshake there?” he teases her.
“To bother me.”
“I would never,” he laughs.
“Oh please Hop. Your favourite pastime is bothering me.”
“You secretly love it,” he winks.
The waitress returns and hands Hopper two straws then smiles between him and Joyce. “It’s so nice to see a young couple so in love,” the older lady remarks before walking away.
“Oh we’re not…” Joyce attempts to correct her, but it’s no use, she’s already back at the counter.
An awkward silence falls between them and Joyce fiddles with her thumbs while she waits for Hopper to add the new straws to the drinks.
“Can you believe that she thought-” he begins with a forced chuckle.
“Gosh no. How crazy would that be?”
“Totally crazy,” he sighs. They each sip a milkshake and eventually the awkwardness falls away and Hopper is once again teasing Joyce about hogging the chocolate milkshake.
.
.
Lonnie resumes telling his story and Joyce continues to pretend to listen, but she isn’t. She notices Chrissy place her hand over Hopper’s and feels queasy. A strange realization overcomes her and she suddenly panics. The fate of their relationship was in Hopper’s hands but she would never be like Chrissy and she worries that maybe she’s allowed herself to become disillusioned with what could be.
It was stupid of her to assume that Hopper would ever choose what he didn’t have with her over what he did have with Chrissy. They were perfect. The cheerleader and the jock. Everyone said so. Perhaps she was stupid and naive for believing that she was the type of girl that Hopper would want to sweep off her feet. They may live in a small town, but there were plenty of girls that were better suited for Hopper than she was and he had to see that. She never should have let herself realize she had feelings for him. That was her first mistake.
Before then, she was fine to live in her oblivious bubble. Obliviousness, though not ideal, meant that she wasn’t at risk of getting hurt. Now that she was standing here, in the crosshairs of what could have been and what could be, she would give anything to go back and remove the possibility of getting hurt.
It was too late now. Too much had happened and she knew it was foolish to think that they could forget everything and move past it but if that meant they could save some of their friendship, she was still willing to give it a shot.
Lonnie is still talking though all Joyce hears is white noise. She excuses herself and heads to the ladies' room where she splashes her face with cold water. When the water does nothing to calm her, she reaches for the pack of cigarettes in her pocket and returns to the table where she informs Lonnie that she’ll be back in a few moments. He nods and tells her he’ll be at the table waiting.
She doesn’t notice that Hopper is no longer sitting at his own table.
.
.
With Hopper gone, Chrissy begins talking to Karen Wheeler, a fellow senior member of the cheerleading squad. The girls are giggling about a mishap that one of the younger members of the squad had during the on-field performance when Benny asks Chrissy where Hopper ran off to.
“He went out for a smoke,” she informs him. “Or maybe he went to go make eyes at a certain brunette where I can’t see him doing it.”
Her second statement has some bite but Benny ignores the maliciousness in her tone and nods.
“Their friendship is strange, isn’t it?” Karen remarks obliviously.
“I don’t understand why he wastes his time with her,” Chrissy huffs.
Benny, who’s listening in on them, just rolls his eyes and sits silently. He knew exactly why Hopper “wasted” so much time with Joyce and he had an odd feeling it was only a matter of time before his friend and Joyce discovered that reason for themselves.
“Wait,” a younger boy Chrissy doesn’t recognize interjects, “are you talking about the guy that just left here?”
The guy was in a few of Benny’s classes and was a member of the junior class, but Chrissy can’t be bothered to ask his name. He seemed like a total stoner and if she was being honest, she was already bored of this conversation.
“Yeah, why?” Karen answers.
“Oh man, I feel so bad for that guy's girlfriend. I saw him totally making out with the girl that threw that party last week.”
“ I’m his girlfriend.” Chrissy hisses.
“Oh shit . My bad.”
Chrissy looks across the table at Benny, who seems amused by what he’s just been told and she scowls.
“You must be thinking of someone else,” she fake smiles at the kid.
Chrissy doesn’t give the kid a chance to refute her remark and instead whips around to look at where Joyce was previously sitting with some punk rock-looking loner from school when she and Hopper came into the diner. She is irritated to find the male sitting at their booth alone. Joyce, and her boyfriend nowhere to be seen.
Angry, Chrissy gets up and smooths down the edge of her skirt. She gestures for Karen to follow her and marches over to the table where Lonnie Byers is sitting alone.
“Can I help you?” Lonnie asks as the two cheerleaders approach his table.
“Hi,” Chrissy smiles down at him. “I’m Chrissy, this is Karen.”
Following Chrissy’s lead, Karen waves at Lonnie and half-heartedly twirls one of her curls through her fingers.
“Lonnie,” he says skeptically.
“That’s a nice shirt,” Chrissy says, referring to his beaten-up band tee.
“Thanks?”
“How’s your night going?” Chrissy pries.
“Fine. Is there a reason you came over here?”
“I just wanted to see how things were going with you and Joyce.”
“I didn’t realize you two even knew each other,” Lonnie says.
“Hop introduced us.”
“ Right ,” Lonnie says dryly.
“So your date is going well?”
“Who said it was a date?”
“Isn’t it?”
“What do you want Chrissy?”
“It’s too bad really, that Joyce will never actually date you.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“I just think it’s a little pathetic. And too bad really.”
“What’s pathetic?”
“How obsessed she is with Hopper. It’s getting ridiculous, she practically follows him around and stalks him.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Oh, you didn’t know? She has a total stalker-like crush on him. It’s actually a bit sad. He only hangs out with her because he feels bad for her. Anyways, I just thought you should know.”
Giggling, she links her arm through Karen’s and the two girls head back to their table. Lonnie states after Chrissy and Karen in a daze. He thinks over what he’s been told and glances towards the diner door, where he catches sight of Hopper following Joyce to the side of the building.
He knew Joyce and Hopper had a complicated relationship, but maybe it was far more complicated than he initially thought.
.
.
Joyce exits the diner in a hurry, swinging the glass door open and stepping out into the cool evening air with a large sigh. She’s too preoccupied with fishing her pack of smokes out of her bag to notice that Hopper is leaning up against the wall next to the door, watching her.
He stares down at her, one foot anchoring him to the wall, cigarette loosely dangling between his chapped lips.
Upon spotting him, Joyce quickly swivels on her heel and marches away from the front of the diner, rounding the building and choosing instead to stand in the alley between the building and the parking lot.
“Joyce,” he calls after her. She can hear the crunch of the gravel beneath his boots and knows that he’s following her but she doesn’t slow down.
“Joyce! Please stop,” he yells. He sounds defeated and it tugs on something within her and forces her to stop stalking away. Standing rooted in her spot in the alley, she whips around to face him, messy hair falling across her face as she spins around. “What?!” she snaps.
“Can we finish our conversation from earlier?” he asks sheepishly.
“I think it’s best we don’t.”
“Look, I’m sorry that we were interrupted. But don’t shut me out.”
“Don’t be sorry. After all, she’s your girlfriend , she had every right to interrupt the conversation we were having.”
“Joyce,” he sighs. “Can we not talk about her right now? This is about you and I.”
Hopper takes a step towards her but Joyce stubbornly holds her ground and squares her shoulders to show that she isn’t affected by their close proximity. It’s an act, she’s insanely affected, but she refuses to show him what he does to her.
“There’s nothing to talk about,” she shrugs, doing her best to act neutral.
“There’s plenty to talk about.”
Another step. She’s standing between him and the wall of the diner, and though they’re outside it’s suddenly hard to breathe.
“You want to talk? Alright, fine. Why? Why can’t we just forget about everything that’s happened and move on?” she demands to know. Her eyes scan his but she finds no sign that he’s going to shy away from answering her.
“Why?” he growls. He leans towards her and forces her back to collide with the brick while he leans down and allows his nose to hover near hers. Their breath mingles and they both gasp before he speaks in a hushed, tortured tone, “Because it’s taking everything in me not to kiss you again right now.”
He leans in and allows his lips to hover near her ear, sending a shiver rippling through her body.
“Joyce, I want-”
“You think you want,” she corrects his unfinished statement. Finding her strength, she snaps out of her Hopper-infused haze and decides she can’t lose herself to lust when they needed to talk this out.
“What?” he blinks. He leans away from her and stares down at her with confusion.
“You think you want me Hopper. You like the idea because you can’t have me. But you don’t actually want me. Not like that .”
“I-” he stutters, “I’ll prove that that’s not true.”
“How?” she whispers. She knows what she’s asking of him is impossible but her guard is up and she needs him to help her tear it down.
“What if Chrissy and I were to break up? Would that fix things between us? Then will you believe me when I tell you that I care about you and that I don’t want to forget about what happened in the garden.”
“Leaving her won’t fix anything!” she yells in his face. With a sad sigh, she looks up at him with tear-filled eyes and continues in a lower, calmer voice, “I don’t even know who you are anymore Hop. You bail on our plans, you care about what other people think…”
“I’m still me Joyce. Can’t you see how I feel about you?”
She needs him to say it, to break down the wall she’d so delicately built by telling her she mattered to him, but he stands, inches from her face with his mouth hung open, unable to tell her what she needs to hear.
He wants to, desperately. But something prevents him from telling her his feelings for her are far from platonic. He’s afraid. Afraid she won’t feel the same way, though he’s almost certain she does. Afraid that things will change between them and worst of all, he’s scared to screw up and lose her.
“I know that you know. You know me, Joyce. You know me.” His eyes are pleading, but ever the stubborn one, Joyce pushes against his chest and frees herself from the man-made compound between him and the wall, and she begins her walk home, leaving a stunned and confused Hopper alone with his unsaid feelings.
This is a big world, that was a small town
There in my rear-view mirror disappearing now
Now it's too late for you and your white horse
To catch me now
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
so I was late to asking u things and I don't want u to have to repeat yourself so answer all the questions in the thing that you haven't already answered thank u 😌
the way I had to pull out my laptop to answer these bc I couldn’t keep them straight on my phone clipboard................ fdskjfsdkj I think I’m gonna put most of these under a read more so they don’t take up too much dash space. thank u!! <3
zinc white; how are you really feeling today? no one-word answers please!
honestly I’m great! it is currently almost 2 in the morning but my day was nice, I got some new clothes, did my laundry, made a good dinner...good vibes all around, loving it for me rn
yellow ochre; name an artist/band whom you just discovered & can’t get enough of!
I haven’t really listened to a lot of new music lately dkfjskj I think the most recent new artist I started listening to was orville peck?? but that was back in like february
naples yellow; where do you feel most at home?
uhh when I’m at home. yes I’m a homebody <3
raw sienna; with whom do you feel most at home?
truly it’s with the thots I just feel so at ease
golden ochre; describe the relationship you have with your closest friend.
it’s just easy, u know? like no matter what we’re doing, even if we’re just vibing on our own together, it’s nice. I can tell them absolutely anything and it’s not weird and I don’t have to force it out at all
cadmium orange; what do you like to do on your days off?
ok first I always see if any of my friends are busy fkdjsfkj and if they aren’t I see if they wanna just chill or w/e but otherwise just like. turning some music up and sitting in my room with a book/a couple movies I love is ideal for me on a day off. I am very simple I just like to chill
orange lake; do you have anyone you can turn to when you’re sad?
yes! there are two whole people in this world that I spill absolutely everything to bc I trust them with my life and esp when I’m sad bc they always make me feel better. talking to them when I’m having A Day is like I vent and instantly I am normal again. they know who they are I’m sure but for transparency’s sake, it’s u (robin) and maya, no one else gets to unlock my tragic backstories <3
titans; do you prefer slow mornings or relaxing evenings?
relaxing evenings!
shakhnazaryan red; are you currently binge-watching anything?
actually I am currently rewatching cycles 1 through 22 of america’s next top model, I’m on like cycle 5 rn I think. having the time of my life, thanks for asking
red ochre; are you more right-brained (creative) or left-brained (analytical)?
I am very much more into creative endeavors, like work-wise, but I feel like the way I think about things is much more analytical. like I prefer Making things, writing or various crafts or what have u, but even when I create I think about the things I’m doing like analytically?? so ig left-brained
burnt sienna; is there a painting that brings you peace when you look at it?
boy with squirrel by john singleton copley. I love him
english red; what animal do you relate to most?
interesting question! I have no idea. maybe birds? like a finch, maybe. they seem like they have fun
cadmium red; do you have a “type” when it comes to a significant other?
this one is hard for me to answer bc like. I truly have no idea what a “type” is idk if that’s an ace thing or what. no? maybe? all the people I’ve had crushes on have been vastly different, in terms of like physical looks so probably not actually. I’m not attracted to muscular people tho bc I don’t think they have feelings <3
carmine; what does your ideal second date look like?
once again I have never pictured a date. I just want to hold hands! I think for the ideal first date question I said it just had to be going somewhere where we could Do things together, like walking around a museum or going through shops downtown or something, and that does still apply here, but for the sake of shaking it up, uhh...idk maybe staying in and watching a movie. like not at a theater no one needs to know my business like that but like. at a House. whoever’s, I’m not picky, again ideally I just want to hold hands.
madder lake red; would you ever kiss someone (or accept a kiss) on a first date?
yes. literally if the first thing u do is kiss me I am okay with it. I’m 23 someone just take the shot and kiss me already I’m going crazy over here
quinacridone rose; what’s something you’re really looking forward to?
really looking forward to the holidays personally I got everyone some really good gifts this year and I can’t wait to hand them out. also my copy of 13 storeys is supposed to finally ship out this week, for real this time! so that’s exciting too
violet rose; what does your dream house look like?
u know that idealized house with the yellow paint and the white trim? yes. just small and cute and homey
violet; is there any place in particular you’d like to settle down?
I guess not?? I’d like to be somewhere near my mom bc she’s important to me but like. as long as I’m living with someone I love it doesn’t really matter where I don’t think
blue lake; what would you like to do/accomplish before you settle down?
uh. settling down to me equates to like falling in love and living together so honestly that could happen any time. I need to get a job before we live together so I can like Help Out but like. really any time
cobalt blue spectral; what is the most beautiful place you have ever been to?
I have not been to a lot of places! I’ve been to new york, and san diego, and like. phoenix outside of where I live so. actually if I can include like buildings in places I would like to say that one opera house I went to in new york. I learned I wasn’t a fan of operas BUT I also learned those chandeliers were cool as hell
ultramarine; when was the last time you were in a good mood? do you know/remember what sparked it?
I’m usually in a good mood, I think? my baseline mood is genuinely just like. happy/chill, pero I think the last time I felt Euphoria (tm) was a couple days ago when my mom and I made a really nice dinner together and my brother was there and we just played board games all night
blue; what’s the most recent dream you remember?
I have this recurring habit of waking up from dreams but only barely so when I fall back asleep it feels like I just woke up within the dream? anyway the last one was like that but in one of the times I ‘woke up’ I looked out the window and instead of outside there was like this. static photo of buffalo grazing in open fields?? and it was like green screened kinda, so when I move the image moved with my line of sight it was weird. that’s how I knew it was a dream and woke myself up again, only to immediately fall back asleep and feel like I was waking up from a dream within a dream again
bright blue; what does your dream family look like? any kids or pets? how many of each?
I think living with friends would be cool. like I want to have a significant other I live with but also if we lived with other friends that would be fun. kids, maybe! would be something I’d have to discuss with whatever partner I have in the future. if yes to kids, max two. also I don't want babies, preferably I would adopt older children. pets absolutely, however many doesn’t matter. I’m open to just living in a house with the love of my life and like twelve dogs, that’s ok with me
blue cobalt; do you like your name? would you give yourself a different name if you could?
I do like my name! I think it’s nice and it feels like it fits me. I don’t think I’d change it ever, but if I did I think maybe I’d go with jude bc yes I do love to project <3
prussian azure; what’s your favorite scent?
it’s a tie between suntan lotion and the lumber aisle of any hardware store
azure blue; what’s your favorite type of tea, if any?
vanilla rooibos tea supremacy!
turquoise blue; if you could start a garden, what would you plant?
lots of flowers, first of all. also some kitchen herbs. maybe some fruits!
cerulean blue; if you were guaranteed to have a viewership, would you start a youtube vlog?
yes <3 I want to force people to listen to my pretentious horror opinions and get paid for it
glauconite; describe your body without using any negative adjectives.
look I just have to say it: I’m hot. last night I took a photo and saw my nose from the side and went “omg who IS she” like it’s cute. I’M cute. I’ve seen my ass in the mirror and nothing can top it, sorry
yellow green; picture yourself walking in a field. what do you see & hear in this scenario?
all I’m getting is those scenes from horror movies where eerie whistling starts and like birds start going crazy
green light; are you in a comfortable place in life? if not, what do you think might make it better?
I think so?? I’d like to be more financially secure, pero. I think for the most part yeah I’m alright
green; name three countries you want to visit; do you have any actual plans in place to visit any of them?
ireland and greece for sure, ireland is the one I have most planned out in my head. ig maybe england for the third one, just bc I know my mom wants to go and also I’m very bad at geography so I don’t know what counts as a country. I had to look all these up, I do want to visit them tho, genuinely! esp ireland
emerald green; do you speak any languages besides english? are there any additional languages you want to learn?
the one I’m most fluent in is spanish! and I’m still cracking along at russian, currently I can hold a conversation with like a 4 year old and we can understand each other, it’s pretty cool. I really wanna get into learning irish!! I have a few resources downloaded onto my phone I just haven’t gotten around to it yet
oxide of chromium; what’s your favorite book?
a little life <3 yes I hate it when things are sad just to be sad yes this is my favorite book I contain multitudes
mars brown; what’s a movie that always puts a smile on your face/makes you laugh?
the burbs! I’ve seen it so many times but it always hits
burnt umber; what’s something you plan to do before the day is over to take care of yourself?
the day IS over it’s like two thirty am now but uh. drink some water before I sleep probably
voronezhskaya black; what or who is your go-to outlet for when you need to vent?
I post the “kirby’s fucking pissed” meme on twitter and then I ask u (robin) if I can yell for like five minutes and then I feel valid and then I am normal again
payne’s gray; describe your aesthetic?
it’s a little bit jock and it’s a little bit 1980s skater boy but the best way I can really Describe it is just “gay”
4 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
86toni
Unbetitelt
atdatyahoo
Anne T. Donahue
kpopwithsteph
Kpop Groups Songs Profiles
at71cusfinch
ya ok
decimejean
awkward