LITANY AGAINST FAST FASHION: A SHORT GUIDE

2 disclaimers:

I'm not an expert, these are just my ideas. The more you can add on or correct the better, please reblog

The first responsibility in fixing these issues (there are many, it's not a single problem with a single solution) lies with the people making the big money off of this. If you feel like you already have a system for making clothing and textiles work for *you* and you don't feel up to changing anything, that's absolutely fine and you should feel good about yourself for finding something that works.

Having said that, here's the main problem as I see it:

DUE TO FAST FASHION, WE'VE ALREADY PRODUCED ENOUGH TEXTILE/GARMENTS TO LAST US FOR GENERATIONS

The term "fast fashion" really comes from the rapid circulation of collections high street brands go through. H&M famously advertises they have "something new every time you visit", you can always find new pyjamas at Primark, Pull & Bear prints new shitty tshirts every day. Obviously, not all of those clothes actually sell well and then continue to get worn until they are absolutely beyond repair. Most of those garments end up in landfills. Even the stuff that sells usually doesn't survive past a couple uses and gets thrown out.

=> What can I do in the face of this?

Cherish every bit of textile you have. Even dishcloths. Remember even though sewing machines exist every label, hem, and embroidery is hand-crafted onto your bit of fabric. Was it under $50? Then it's likely someone suffered to bring this to you. This is obviously not your fault and this is not meant to inspire personal guilt, but it might inform the way you handle fabrics. Wash something instead of throwing it out whenever you can and follow the instructions on the label. Choose the right kind of fabric for your needs so you don't have to continuously get new stuff.

Learn how to repair and/or alter stuff. This is a big one HOWEVER I feel like this advice is often thrown around without mentioning that a lot of clothing these days isn't made to be repaired. Some socks are so thin and flimsy they won't take to darning and some shoes aren't meant to be cobbled. Most hems don't have enough spare fabric to lengthen a pair of trousers these days. Once you learn about these techniques though you'll be able to more or less tell which is which before buying. I feel confident in my repairing abilities now so I only buy clothing that's sturdy enough to take a few repairs. Again, if that's above price range, don't feel bad.

BUY SECONDHAND. This is the single best piece of advice anyone can give to avoid the fast fashion trap. Always look for a secondhand option - charity shops, bespoke vintage stores, refurbished design, heck, even ebay. Buy something that has already been through circulation and don't add to the demand for new products. The way quality has declined over the last ten years, this also means you'll likely get much higher quality.

Learn to make your own stuff. This is basically a last resort as it's costly and takes a lot of effort and resources. If you're at all interested in fashion though, it's very much worth it to at least look into one or two fabric arts to pick up on the side. You'll have full control over the materials, cut, size, and finish of the garments you make yourself. If nothing else doing this will help you appreciate how much a piece of fabric or a garment is really worth in terms of labour and expertise.

Wear a piece of clothing until you can't repair it any longer. Then, turn it into rags or use it as scrap material for small projects if you do any crafts. After that, donate or re-sell what you can. No, not everything that's donated gets sold, but it's still the most responsible way to get rid of textile products you don't need anymore.

Buying more expensive garments isn't always better. I've had €500 shoes that went bust after two wears and I've had cheap tshirts that lasted for years. When you need a longer lasting item, say, a coat or a pair of boots - do some research, check second hand options, and stay critical. Don't buy based on brand. A good example is Doc Martens, whose boots have famously more or less gone to shit the past 5 or so years.

Remember, fashion is both a verb and a noun. Enjoy!

Day 21: Saturday January 21, 2023 - “Fever To The Form”

The hustle and bustle of these weekend days, gets me thinking several times a day “im too old for this!” as I try to keep up with this busy boy; trying to stay mindful, and skillfully one step ahead - a constant task loading I am getting better at each day.  This is my parenting story.  I am writing it actively every day.  We spend a lot of time together working on this. Together.

Today, instead of counting the hours down to bathtime, I had my sights set on an evening loop drive for afternoon nap so I could catch a pretty sunset out over the cacti and mountain and read some of my book to get some “me time” while he slept.  Its something Ive been doing a lot of days lately and looking forward to it.  Its pretty out there around 5:20, and I was looking forward to it especially today, that was a bit more frenetic than usual.  But when 5pm rolled around, I got a better gift...curled up in my arm pit like a big cat. Slowly his eyes closed as I laid there as still as I could, using my selfie arm to check his eyes every few minutes.  It was an easy no-brainer audible to call - I wouldn’t be moving until he does; no sunset drive tonight.  This was the only “me-time, quiet-time” I needed.  So many days I wish for moments like this; wishing he’d just slow down and cuddle up.  What a gift.  I thought about the pink sky, the little bit of snow on the mountain, and the cacti standing proudly as guardians of all that beauty, and how that scene would unfold tonight as it does every night and how I wasn’t missing a thing....but how this, comfort and security of quiet between father and son, captured on a selfie in a cut off Tshirt, was the real photo of the day.  I cherished every single minute.  Not missing a thing. This WAS Fever to the Form.   All that chasing and seeking - maybe this was exactly what Ive always needed.  All the struggle and frustration Ive dug through at times, maybe this is what I was so desperately seeking.  And if I could just lock in that thought, and hold it in those times of stress and anxiety, I would feel the comfort that William is feeling right now.  

Even when he woke up, he was so sweet and lovey - a great reset for him making for an easy run-up to dinner and bath time and bed time.  And when bed time came, he wouldn’t let me (or his truck) leave him and I wound up just going to bed when he did, cuddled up together in the big bed while I read quietly with my flashlight.  When I turned out the light to sleep for myself, and curled around my baby boy, kissing the top of his hairy head, I told him I loved him and thanked him for pushing me and loving me.

Song: Nick Mulvey - Fever To The Form

Quote: “Keep your best wishes, close to your heart and watch what happens” ― Tony DeLiso

new year 2024

this holiday break was pretty fun, despite being sick for the majority of my time off. it was nice to have a big party that was constantly going, with all loved ones together.

i arrived back in LA on the 16th night at 10pm. my brother offered to pick me up because he had some coffee equipment he wanted to drop off at my parent's house. he was coughing in the car during the majority of the drive home. because it was like 2am EST by then and i just got off a long plane ride, my body was probably also weaker. i also thought i became "stronger" because i'm able to withstand the NYC cold so i didn't bundle up as much as i usually would - meaning, i was walking around with just a tshirt instead of sweater. i also went to their house again on monday to WFH before heading to pick my parents up at LAX, and my brother continued to cough a lot around me. anyway, i started feeling sick a week afterwards, coincidentally after my last work week. it started with having a sore throat that turned into a painful sore throat, then a full on cold with a LOT of coughing. i think it's the sickest i've been (minus covid) for the past 5-8 years and it lasted like a whole 8 days.

we spent christmas at my aunt's house. i was masked up with a sore throat, but wasn't feeling that bad yet. she cooked an amazing hot pot dinner. i gifted my cousins $25 each and wrote them a card. i was supposed to pick matt up from the airport that night (he was scheduled to arrive at 12:30am, but ended up arriving an hour earlier due to it being christmas/less crowds). he asked his brother to get him instead so i could rest.

that week, i progressively got worse. we were supposed to go to hot yoga and rescheduled it 3x, but ended up not going at all. on thursday, i went to LAX to pick up my auntie and uncle who were visiting from dallas. i was coughing basically the entire drive back. my aunt is a feisty/funny one with good fashion sense and her man is a white former policeman. we got khmer noodles in chinatown. i gave up my room for them to stay in. that night, i drove over to matt's place to sleep. his dad recently got a new tempurpedic mattress and duvet, and it's now like sleeping on a cloud (big upgrade from the previous spring mattress). his family gave me some antiobiotics and matt made me some hot lemon ginger tea.

friday morning, we were supposed to all head out to indio airbnb for a big family gathering (14ppl + baby). like our previous trip maybe 5 years ago, there was some drama about people not wanting to go or being on the fence about going. it was last minute that my grandma and uncle S decided to join. then even more last minute, uncle M decided to back out. then last last minute, uncle M decided to join again. so, we successfully got everyone out there lol. i was feeling really crappy this morning and almost didn't want to go. but i felt hopeful that taking antibiotics would help. we all met at my parent's house and departed from there - 3 cars total. the airbnb had 6 rooms and everyone got to sleep comfortably on a bed. there was a pool table, grill, jacuzzi/heated pool, and game room so everyone was pretty entertained. i was in and out of resting but it was really nice to have everyone around. the next morning, we took some fun group photos outside and it's a time i'll cherish forever. it's not easy to get the family together like this.

i spent that night and the next day at matt's again. with my family, it was about chilling and having fun. with his family, it's all about work/planning lol. his parents talked to me about planning a trip to japan, and also about a trip to vegas next week when matt's in town again. i let them know that japan is a bit far for us to fly out to from NYC (16 hours) and to wait until matt's job prospects are clearer. it would make sense to go once he has more than a week off at a time. for NYE dinner, we had bbq steak and skewers. i was still feeling sick but on the path to recovery by this time. that night, we retired early around 10pm because i had to drop matt off at LAX at 5am for an early flight back to NYC.

i spent more time with my aunt on her last days here. it took some time for us to warm up to each other, but it's always nice to spot some similarities within the family. she has a very feminine, aggressive strength that i admire. we went thrift shopping together and she helped pick out an elegant simple black helmut lang dress for me. i put on home alone 2 to watch together with her and my mom. i missed her after she left.

SS invited me to a classpass workout on 1/2 but we decided to reschedule for next time. even though we didn't get to meet, i appreciated the thought. i had the goal of running 2 miles multiple times a week and was successful up until the point where i got sick. i haven't done any workouts in the last 10 or so days. SZ will come over later for a baby workout.

therapy: i had my first video session with monica today. i felt a little awkward at first. she looked older than i thought she was (based off of her grad year, she's supposed to be around my age). i felt more closed off with the video on than on our previous phone call. i also noticed that i feel self conscious if i see her eyes looking elsewhere (thinking am i boring you, am i communicating well enough, are you listening, etc) and i share less when this happens. anyway, this session was OK. we had both come back from holiday mode. i had a generally great week and a half or so, so it didn't feel good to resurface my issues that i temporarily forgot about or to rehearse/explain them to someone else. it was like "here's reality again". or even worse, it felt like i was listing out all my problems, which takes even more effort for someone who doesn't already know me/my life. and also a bit more effort to explain the realities of a medical career. she asked a lot of questions, and had more questions after each of my answers without much feedback. i honestly felt worse after this session. i questioned if my issues are severe enough to warrant therapy or if it's more beneficial to chat with friends about it for support. anyway, i have another session with her next wednesday - we'll see how it goes. perhaps it's not a good fit, or this is just part of the process.

babysitting: my brother and SIL have been really really dependent upon my parents for babysitting. my SIL grew up rich and always had this mentality that she's the boss/can order other people around. she has a lot of tact so can get by with it. my parents (mostly dad) really missed my niece during their 3 week cruise, so they were happy to babysit her when they came back. the daycare was also closed for the holidays for a week. however, they're still really tired, from their own duties/chores, running businesses, entertaining visitors, meeting friends, etc. yesterday, my SIL received news that the daycare will be closed for the next two weeks due to personal issues - which means more work for my parents. though they are technically happy to babysit their grandbaby, it can also be extremely exhausting. my niece is also getting to be really spoiled because everyone dotes on her. today, my parents decided to start letting her be diaper-less. my dad spanked her for the first time ever twice today, like really hard, because she peed her pants after having the chance to pee on the toilet. he was only ever loving/doting/accommodating to her since she was born so it was shocking to finally see this discipline. i don't know how i feel about spanking.

I totally forgot to post the birthday gifts I got from my partner this summer!!

I A D O R E @dappermouth work and I am so proud to finally own some. I definitely will be getting more in the future but this is a good start for sure!!

Please go follow and support her work! Here's her store too! https://dappermouth.storenvy.com/

(excuse my wallet and external hard drive lmao I still need to get a frame)

The Costuming and Coloring of JATP : Part 1 - Julie Molina

I’ve seen so many of these posts and I wanted to make my own! I love costuming and color theory in film and I thought I’d do my own take on jatp! Please keep in mind that I am by no means an expert and this is only my thoughts, and feel free to add your own interpretations and thoughts :)

Heads up this is a super long post (I won’t be coving all of Julie’s outfits, only the ones that have significant meaning)

And none of this could have been possible without Soyon An, the costume designer of jatp! All referenced quotes and information for her can be found here, here, and here

One of the main difficulties of costume design is having the clothing fit the period, tone of the piece, and the character. The characters have to wear the clothes, not the other way around. Who is this person? What are their conflicts? How do they look at the world? What do they value? How do they grow? Just some examples of what good costume designers ask. 

They can also be used as a subtle tool to show who each character is; how we dress is a reflection of ourselves.

JULIE MOLINA:

Ok so we all know she is an absolute queen with AMAZING fits, even from the start of the show! I’m going to go chronologically, just to make it easier on all of us!

Julie starts off the series in a baggy yellow sweatshirt over her blue and white shirt, her painted jeans, fluffy slippers, and a set of necklaces! (Actually we first see her at school, where she wearing a flannel instead of the sweatshirt, but the same concepts apply) This already gives us A TON of information on her!!

Her necklaces include a Virgin Mary pendant, a nod to her heritage and religion and one of her own name, which we can assume is a gift from someone special to her

She puts on the sweatshirt after she gets home and bombed playing in front of her class. Idk about you, but I always want to wear sweatshirts and comfy clothes whenever I feel down, so I infer that that is what Julie is doing! 

There is also something to be said about the visual irony between bright yellow smiley face on the front and Julie’s own grieving

(Also can I just say that I love that Julie is allowed to be a teen and wear silly slippers because their comfortable clothes. I am so tried of teenagers being over sexualized and as a brown girl myself, it’s wonderful to see these multidimensional non white characters!)

Her own painted jeans, (also pretty baggy) and sneakers as said by Soyon An, are painted by Julie! (We also see her creativity later when drawing a cupcake on her mic for Luke’s bday, but that’s another post)

Her creativity seems to have no bounds, and it’s obvious that from the start that this is how she expresses herself!

If you want to get really analytical, one could say that the bright yellow covering up her blue collar could show how Julie herself is trying to cover up her own sadness

The blue and yellow also come up in another scene of hers with Luke, but that is another post entirely

JUST FROM HER CLOTHES ALONE WE, THE VIEWERS, ALREADY SUBCONCIOUSLY KNOW SOOOO MUCH ABOUT JULIE:

She’s most likely Catholic and cherishes her religion and family

She’s not feeling too confident in herself

She’s crazy creative and talented

She’s trying to mask some sort of sadness

ISN’T THAT INSANE??? A TELL TALE SIGN OF A GOOD COSTUMER!

Julie then moves to plaid pants and a cropped lavender blouse (Which I absolutely adore!!!) 

She has just met the boys, and Luke gave her that little pep talk in front of the studio and is now wearing form fitting clothes!

DON’T TWIST THIS: She’s wearing these clothes because she now feels more confident in herself and is ready to sit down and play Wake Up

Julie is wearing more subdued colors; the focus isn’t on her outfit, that’s not where the color is. The color is lighting Julie from behind. The focus of the moment is Julie and her music.

You’ll also notice the lighting behind her shifts from the cold early morning, to the sun rising behind her, again, very poetic. The sun is literally rising on Julie and it is a new dawn for her, and the start of the show itself

Not to mention Wake Up which is literally about moving forward and... waking up lol

This is maybe one of my favorite performance outfits of her! (Who am I kidding, all of them are my favorite)

Julie is wearing a camo jumpsuit with patches and her signature sneakers

The patches, once again, show us that Julie is creative in many ways along with her shoes

I love that all of her outfits seem like the average person could make them and wear them. Yet, these characters are still teenagers and are discovering their own personal style, which can be sort of outlandish. It really works to ground the show in reality with all of the kooky happenings

Julie is once again wearing her necklaces, and we can infer that she wears them all of the time

In this outfit (with an added Double Trouble tshirt underneath), she also sings Flying Solo. The jumpsuit is a reflection of her friendships with the guys and Flynn!

And this outfit with Bright??? Chefs kiss. This is the subtle characterization I live for!

Julie’s actress, Madison Reyes’, mother is in the armed forces. She and Soyon wanted an outfit to pay homage to her, and I think the camo works perfectly

By this time we already have a good grasp on who Julie is

Julie is wearing a neon blue leotard, silver white pants, fishnets, her drawn on white sneakers and a rainbow chunky sequin cloak. She also find a drum major’s cape from the music room. She has her hair in the same cornrowed way as she does in Stand Tall, with pink, red, and blue ribbons.

While I may be jumping the gun this early in the post, I love this detail. This is her fantasy which ends up coming true in the final number and that is just beautiful

Julie’s fantasy outfit in I Got the Music is so extra and wonderful

This is Julie’s idealized self; it is bright and unapologetic and you can’t help but notice her. The outfit is purposefully outlandish and completely unrealistic

This is the first thing that clues you in that this is a fantasy; she does a quick change from her previous outfit. You can also see that her trio of necklaces aren’t there.

She keeps some elements from her actual school outfit, the pants and presumably the leotard, they just get an upgrade

Ok now onto the breakdown:

These are her school colors

This is the first time we see Julie in blue since the first episode. So far, we have seen her in muted tones. This time the blue is vibrant. This signals to the viewers that she is not hiding anymore and has almost reclaimed the color

Soyon specifically said she wanted a hood for Julie such as the Virgin Mary is traditionally depicted with a head covering

Julie is wearing her school colors loud and proud with a cropped LFHS reddish hoodie, underneath is a bright blue leotard, a blue belt, and white distressed jeans and fishnets

Julie is now fully in her element and has formed a band with the boys!!! Woohoo!

If you recall, in this episode, Julie also interacts the most with Carrie and Nick up until now; the two characters rooted in her school life.

Most everything I said in the previous section is here too, just a little toned down.

One thing that I see in this outfit is that she’s wearing a little bit of the boys’ themes; Luke’s blue, Reggie’s red, and Alex’s denim and grey. 

This is also the day that she gets into the conflict with the boys, they go to Bobby’s to get revenge, lie to her, and bail on the dance. I see this as them becoming closer and then falling farther apart.

Julie is also wearing fishnets and socks, which mirrors Dirty Candi’s performance of Wow. This is a wonderful detail to show that the two aren’t so different after all.

I love this outfit and I will forever be mad that we never got to see her perform in it

Julie is wearing her mothers mesh tie dye top, a black tank top, and loose black striped pants

THIS IS SUPER IMPORTANT: This is the first time we see her wear her mother’s clothes, a physical representation of her coming to terms with her mother’s death!!!

This is also when Flynn comes up with Julie and the Phantoms, another big milestone. This is when they were supposed to make a mark on her school

(Ofc we all know this is when the boys bail...)

The next day, Julie is wearing a powder blue floral dress, sneakers, with a white t shirt and a cream colored cropped fluffy jacket (this is most aligned with my aesthetic)

Again, this shows that she is experimental with her clothes

 It is also worth noting that Soyon does a good job with establishing that she is a sneaker head, I mean have you seen her kicks????

Now is a good time to talk about character colors: good media will establish a color per character. This helps viewers easily distinguish who they are and how they connect to others. Characters may wear these colors a lot or have significant moments in these colors

The colors also have their own meanings which apply (we’ll look more into this in the Stand Tall dress)

Luke is blue, Julie is purple (as we will see later on), Alex is pink, and Reggie is Red

When characters wear another character’s color it signals to us that they will be having a ‘moment’ with the other character (getting along after fighting, learning something new, etc.)

Alternatively, if a character is wearing colors opposite to another, you know they will clash

In this episode, Julie goes to Luke’s house and learns more about him and Emily AND SHES’S WEARING HIS BLUE!!! BIG MOMENT!!!

ONCE YOU NOTICE COLOR IN FILM, YOU CAN LEARN TO PREDICT WHERE THE STORY IS GOING. THESE ARE SOME HELPFUL HINTS:

Notice a character’s colors and when another character wears them, they will be having a ‘moment’

If the color in the scene isn’t on the character, the focus isn’t on them, maybe it’s on the emotions of the scene or other characters

Colors WILL signify emotions; yellow is happy, blue can be sad or calming depending on the shade, red can be passion or anger. If a character wears a lot of one color, you can predict their emotions

Ok no hate, this is definitely not my favorite outfit. It gives me mad Shake It Up vibes, not that that’s bad, just not my thing.

Julie performs Finally Free in a teal and black dress/shirt, silver biker short, a black vest, and arm bands

It has been confirmed by Charlie and Madison that this is when Luke realizes he like Julie, which makes sense as you see that she is wearing blue (She will now start wearing more of these cool tones)

She is also wearing arm bands, something Luke does often

Her vest is also the same one as the girl from the beginning, which we all know by now is Rose, her mother!

She has upcycled the vest and added her own special twists to it! It also helps for us to see connection between Rose and performing

You can also see a dahlia pin, her mother’s favorite flower. These often make an appearance! (They’re also purple)

It’s Edge of Great Time!! This is maybe the most iconic outfit!

Julie performs in a white blouse with butterflies, her hair also with butterfly clips, her pants are constructed beautifully with black and white panels. She finished the outfit with black and white combat boots and more butterflies!

Soyon specifically said that the butterflies represent Julie coming out of her cocoon and coming into herself, like a butterfly would!

This is truly her most powerful and performance worthy outfit and sucks all of the attention to her

Julie’s clean contrast of black and white also make her stand out from the rest of the band! The combination is often a symbol of power and truth! (Think judges robes)

Time to get some tissues, Unsaid Emily, it’s your turn!

This is what I consider Julie’s most average and basic outfit, but there is a lot to analyze here: A magenta sweater and jeans.

This sweater is her mothers; meaning it is probably a comforting item for her, seeing as she is about to have a very emotional moment, calling back to that yellow sweater in the beginning!

Also see how this has blue, pink, and red designs, and I’m sure by now you can tell what I am going to say: These are the guys colors! 

She’s going to have a heartfelt moment involving them, and it fits. This is one of the emotional climax’s of the show and this is when she becomes even closer with the Phantoms

You can tell, just from her standing on the steps of Luke’s house what is about to go down (Well maybe not all of the tears, but still)

Julie goes to check on the guys in the studio in a blue floral shirt and blue jeans

These are once again, Luke’s colors, but are slowly becoming THEIR colors. She wears these when she is saying goodbye to her best friends

This is also the outfit that Julie’ wears when she finds them after the performance and they haven’t crossed over. 

It makes perfect sense that she is wearing all blue when SHE AND LUKE HUG!!! (And then all of the boys too in the best group hug ever)

Of course we’re gonna end the post with this absolutely ICONIC outfit!

Julie is wearing a purple dress with purple tulle, a bedazzled leather jacket, and her hair IN THE SAME STYLE AS I GOT THE MUSIC!!!

Lets go one by one:

The dress is a Balmain dress that Soyon got for $500, then she completely deconstructed it and made it to fit Madison! that’s incredible

This is the climax of the show: the boy are ‘doing their unfinished business,’ Julie is playing the Orpheum, and what color is she wearing but PURPLE! What color are dahlias? PURPLE! What color has had the most significance? PURPLE! What do red, blue, and pink make up? PURPLE! PURPLE IS JULIE’S CHARACTER COLOR

You’ll also notice that her jacket has pink, red, and blue accents, the colors of Alex, Reggie and, Luke, to show that they have become a part of her and she is now a part of them

That’s the same for her hair

It shows how she has now achieved her dream, her make believe world is now her reality

I really think we’ll see more of Julie in purple in the seasons to come, now that she has found herself

I hope that you all have learned a little about color and costuming in this post! Once you get the hang of it, it becomes really fun, like a puzzle!

I hope to do more of these with the rest of the characters as well!

Feel free to add on your own ideas and interpretations!

MM Fluff Week 2020 day 4

Day 4: Accomplishments  ♡  Mysme Friendships

For @mmfluffweek

This one seemed a bit clunky, but IDK, hope you like it anyway!

Yoosung straightened his yellow bowtie yet again and ran fingers through his hair. He went back and forth on whether he should wear his hair clips. In the end, he put them on, after all, Saeran liked them and that’s all that mattered. They were silver with small diamond stars on them. A gift from the twins on his last birthday. Saeran had designed them and helped Saeyoung craft them. If he was honest, they were probably his most prized possession. Taking a deep breath and one final look at himself he nodded and walked out.

This was his only suit, but it had held up well. The sleeves might be a bit small now, he must have grown some, but otherwise fit properly. It was a deep blue that Saeran liked on him, which was a big plus. He was excited and a bit nervous, but he supposed tonight was probably not much different than an RFA party where there would be some wealthy and famous guests. Of course, Yoosung never actually had to mingle with those guests. His duties were more the backstage variety.

He stepped out of his apartment building to a waiting limo. The chauffeur nodded to him as he opened the door.

“Thank you.” Yoosung said.

“My pleasure sir.” The man closed the door as Yoosung settled onto the seat. He’d been in limos before, while accompanying Jumin, but never had one all to himself. It felt silly and wasteful, but Saeran had insisted. It took about fifteen minutes to get to their next destination. The chauffeur once more opened the door, this time to let Saeran in. The man looked stunning, taking Yoosung’s breath away. His red hair was slicked back, his mint colored eyes noticeably not hiding behind the fringe. The black eyeliner was expertly applied, as always, and his studded choker was around his neck. He wore a red Tshirt under a black coat, black jeans and his biker boots. How long since he’d dressed that way? Yoosung had to resist an urge to reach over and ruffle his hair.

Yoosung scooted over to make room for the man next to him, which he took. He turned to him and grinned, green eyes gleaming, but a little terrified as well.

“You look amazing.” He said.

“So do you, I’m glad you decided for this look.” Yoosung admired his boyfriend.

“Uh, yeah…not sure how it will go over though.” Saeran swallowed. Yoosung reached for his hand, it was sweaty.

“Nervous?”

“Shit yeah!” Saeran answered honestly. Yoosung laughed and lay his head on the other man’s shoulder.

“Don’t be, it’s going to be incredible, you’ll see.”

“I…I’m just afraid I’ll let everyone down.”

“You won’t.”

“I wish I could be as confident as you.”

“You don’t have to be, all of us are cheering you on, and even if nobody else likes it, we all love it!” Yoosung turned Searan’s face towards him and kissed him lightly. This was Saeran’s night and he was going to do everything in his power to make it a great one.

Saeran smiled, the tension in his body eased and he reached for the hair clips in Yoosung’s blonde hair. “You wore them.”

“Of course! They’re my lucky charm!” he giggled.

“I’m glad. And grateful for you, being here with me. I can’t imagine having done this by myself without you by my side.”

“You just needed a little push is all.”

“I don’t know. The man I used to be…well…”

“But that wasn’t the real you, it just took you a while to realize who you really are, without all that…uh…”

“It’s OK. I know you’re right. And I know that it will probably be a lifelong journey for me. But I hope you stay by my side.”

“Always.” They exchanged several more kisses before the limo stopped once more. When the door opened, Saeran stepped out into a few lightbulb flashes. He held out his hand for Yoosung, who took it eagerly. There was some media and some onlookers who looked more confused than anything, wondering if they were celebrities of some sort. His amethyst eyes blinked at the crowd, but Saeran only had eyes for him, placing his arm around his waist and leading them inside the art gallery.

The rest of the RFA was already inside, Jaehee and MC in stunning gowns fit for the Oscars. Jumin and Zen both handsome in their tails, Jumin in black, Zen in white, making an ethereal pair. Saeyoung on the other hand, wore a white buttoned long sleeved dress shirt with his regular black and orange hoodie, his hair in it’s usual disarray. Yoosung simply shook his head.

“Little bro! Making the fashionable entrance huh?” Saeyoung hugged him, and the others followed after. Saeran looked a bit awkward and uncomfortable but he handled it well.

“Mr. Choi. I’m so pleased you have arrived, there are several people who have been asking for you. May I take you from your friends?” The woman wore a black cocktail dress, her dark hair in a high tight ponytail, her grey eyes alert and determined.

“Uh…” Saeran stuttered.

“It’s OK, I think we’ll manage.” Yoosung shooed him away. Saeran nodded and let the woman lead him away like a trapped animal.

“He seems to barely be holding on.” Zen laughed sipping from his champagne goblet.

“Give him time, he’ll grow into it. V never much cared for the personal attention either.” Jumin said.

“But V used his charm effectively, I’m not sure Saeran has that same ability.” Jaehee said.

“No, but I think this really has helped him come out of his shell a bit more with other people. Although, I think he enjoys taking photographs because it allows him hide behind the camera.” Yoosung answered.

“Yep, but now he can’t!” Saeyoung laughed. “Can you believe my little brother has his own gallery showing? Not to mention all that social media blowing up over his photos! He’s going to be bigger than V ever was!”

“And I wonder who made that happen.” MC arched her eyebrow at her husband.

“Is it wrong of me to promote my little bro?” Saeyoung asked offended.

“No, but it might be to do it by hacking.” Zen laughed.

“Is that so? Hmm, remind me again, who reblogged onto all his own social media sites?” Saeyoung said.

Zen looked away without answering.

“It was something I never thought I would see, Zen posting something that wasn’t his face or body.” Jumin smirked. Zen slapped his arm but Jumin only laughed and pulled the man close, giving him a peck on the cheek.

“He did take some photos of me as well! I was only trying to help him.” Zen pouted.

“Absolutely my love.” Jumin nodded and went silent.

Yoosung was barely paying any attention as his eyes were on Saeran. In the last few years he’d come leaps and bounds from the man he used to be. There was still that hard shell, but once inside, there was a soft gooey center that was still so very fragile and vulnerable. He cherished the man, the good and the bad, and he was overwhelmingly happy that things were looking up for him. The photos he took were stunning. You couldn’t help but feel something when you saw them. Saeyoung was right, V was incredible, but there was a different perspective to the way Saeran saw the world. The truth of it. That while there was great beauty, there was also great sorrow.

After an hour Saeran finally made his way back to Yoosung.

“Can we go now?” he whispered in desperation.

“No, you promised you’d stay at least until ten.” Yoosung answered.

“What time is it now?”

“Just after nine.”

“Ugh…”

“Come on, why don’t you take me on a tour?”

“You’ve already seen them all.”

“Yes, but, I’d love to hear your perspective on them, you know, explain it to me as if I’ve never seen it before. Besides, it will give you an excuse to stay with me and ignore all these people.” Yoosung grinned.

“True!” Saeran’s eyes lit up. “OK, let’s start over there.” He took Yoosung’s hand and headed towards the center of the gallery. Yoosung didn’t move. “What?”

“I’m so proud of you Saeran.” Yoosung said, eyes glittering with happiness.

Saeran blushed and looked away, but there was a small smile playing around his lips. “You don’t have to say that.” He mumbled.

“I know I don’t have to. I want to. And I am, so very proud. And happy to be here with you. What you’ve done in incredible Saeran. You should be proud of yourself too.”

Saeran sighed and pulled the man closer. Yoosung was sure now, he had definitely grown, he was almost eye to eye with Saeran, if he hadn’t been wearing those biker boots, he might even be taller than the red head now. They embraced and kissed. Flashes exploded around them, but they were oblivious.

Can i request for a ship with nct ;) I'm a libra sun, infj, 99liner, 5'0(sadd), petite. I love everything art such as visual, music, fashion, poetry, architecture, interior and more. I love coffee, nature, solitude, reading, butterflies and blue. Thank you 💗

— :: 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃.

Hello baby! You sound so soft and cute 🥺 And hey, I’m a libra sun too 🥰 Based on what you’ve given me, and what I’ve read about INFJ’s, I think you and Kun, would be a great couple!

»» ──────　[*:. ☁︎ .:*]　────── ««

— GETTING TO KNOW QIAN KUN.

Kun is an introvert, just like you.

He loves his personal quiet time, away frkm his members where he can just kick back and relax without having to constantly worry about them. Don’t get him wrong, he loves his friends, but he’s human and needs a breather once in a while.

Honestly, the first time Kun meets you, he thinks you’re an extrovert. You’re just so lively around others, and have a way to draw them in.

But once he gets to know you better, he finds out that you need that recharge time too, and that you are, in all honesty, an introvert.

Once you two become a but closer, Kun is amazed by how mature you are. How you’re strong-willed and opinionated. He finds that extremely attractive.

Kun may be older than you, but he feels like he learns more from you than you do from him.

He falls for you slowly. It doesn’t just happen with a snap of his fingers. As he studies you, listens to you, talks to you, he finds himself more smitten by the day. You’ve got him wrapped around your finger.

It doesn’t help that the libra in you can be a merciless, yet oblivious flirt too. Now that drives him insane.

Those quick glances, flirty comments and suggestive touches. It makes Kun frustrated that you can’t see how much it’s affecting him.

Kun is a romantic guy. He’ll try to woo you slowly, making you coffee just the way you like it whenever you come over, audibly listening to music you hum softly to yourself and cooking you something nice.

When he finally decides to come clean, he’ll bring you somewhere with a lot of nature where you two can sit and talk, breathing in the crisp fresh air, laying down side by side while you read and nibbling on the food Kun made for the two of you.

He’ll be straightforward, no beating around the bush because he can’t bear to wait a single second to hear your response.

— DATING QIAN KUN.

Kun deeply admires your morals. You’re kindhearted, always looking for ways to help others. And, you don’t just fantasises about these things, you put them into action. You actively try to offer your assistance in any way possible; charity work, animal shelters, donations.

So, Kun is always willing to help you out too. He’ll go to the ends of the Earth to see you smile.

He’s also in love with the fact that although you’re typically soft spoken and not argumentative, you are strong willed and loyal to your beliefs, something he finds immensely inspiring.

Though you’re someone who’s always looking to help others, you tend to disregard your own mental health or wellbeing sometimes which is why Kun is so good for you.

He’s not afraid to force you to just sit still sometimes as he spoils you rotten. Once, when you two first began dating, you were in a bad mental state, putting others needs before your own, and Kun absolutely hated seeing you like that.

Like I said, he’d do anything just to make you happy, so now, he knows when you’re having bit of a rough day and will definitely pamper you. He’ll just shower you in praise and touch, kissing you all over and totally worshiping you with a look of just pure adoration in his eyes. He wants you to feel loved and cherished.

He’ll buy you books you’ve been meaning to read, different coffees he thinks you’ll like, a poetry book, anything at all. If you want it, just say it and he’ll have it for you in the blink of an eye.

If you decide to move in with him, he’ll want you to decorate the place. He’d love to come home every day and be reminded of you through the little personal touches you’ve sprinkled all over his home. It makes him feel all gooey inside.

He’s an absolute sucker for just domestic dates, because he’s a simple man. Even just doing the chores with you gets his heartrate up. When you’re just in comfy clothes, like a loose tshirt and some shorts, he loses his mind. He just wants to squeeze you.

He is obsessed with the fact that you’re so tiny too. He’s not the tallest guy around, so having you be so small and adorable makes him feel big. Whenever he sees you, he just wants to pick you up, throw you over his shoulder and run away with you. That’s why cuddling is his addiction.

His favourite types of kisses are jaw and collarbone ones.

Not a big PDA guy, though he’s not shy to have say, a hand on your thigh or a quick peck. Won’t do it in very big, public open spaces though. He’ll definitely want to have your hand in his at all times though. That is a must.

After he hears that you like butterflies, he’ll bring you to a butterfly park. He’ll take a sneaky picture of you, your cheeks rosy and your eyes twinkling as multiple types of butterflies flutter around you.

He’ll make it his wallpaper, but gets all red when his members find out and tease him about it.

»» ──────　[*:. ☁︎ .:*]　────── ««

— 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧. | 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬.

Metrocon 2019!

Hey yall sorry I haven't been as active, I was busy literally every single day of Metrocon and I finally got a breather. Anyway I wanna just summerize what I can remember because I don't wanna completely forget these wonderful memories. I wanna look back at em over and over again 💕

THURSDAY:

Thursday was the 5 year anniversary of my Gundam Wing cosplay group! I got to hang out with my Metrowing buds and we did a nice photoshoot with the pilots and we had so much fun! I miss them dearly cuz they live out of state but the time I had with them is one I always cherish.

I pretty much spent the whole day with them and I decided that Thurs/Fri would be autograph day for us. By golly the VAs were all so super sweet. All of them loved the candy and the pictures I made for them and as I predicted I got really emotional and kinda cried in front of Luci Christian cuz she is one reason I wanted to VA. Her range is insanely versatile! I legit would call her the Meryl Streep of anime & she was SO kind to me ;///;! When I started crying she said "Don't ever apologize for being real. You're a very sweet person, & I believe in you, there is always room for everyone in this industry ❤️"

And man I just felt so happy at that. She makes me feel confident and I wanna keep trying my best. Same with Josh, Alexis, David & Kara! They were all super encouraging and OmG like ok I think I astral projected when Josh did Armin's or Yuri's voice when he was signing stuff. I teared up QwQ I love his energy and dedication!

I think one of my fave moments during the autographs was when I made the "I'm gonna Bertell you what I Bertold him" joke and David and Josh absolutely lost it xD! They were like OMG WE NEED THAT AS A TSHIRT FOR DAVID XD! Like "You just got BERTOLD" and then they proceeded to make jokes about how he roasted Armin in many ways xD it was hilarious 😂! But oof.

I spent most of the Thursday browsing the Dealer Room and this is was one of the first times I was able to find new Takanori Nishikawa CDs so I bought some that I don't have TTwTT I was so happy! We ended the day by doing a run through of our performances for Anime Idol with Trowa. And it went really well🎶Also, at the cosplay booth, the staff liked my sis' Clear Card Sakura so much they asked her to enter the cosplay hallway contest and I'm so proud of her cuz this her first cosplay ever ^u^- she looks so cute! And many people wanted her pic all weekend :D

FRIDAY:

As usual this is Anime Idol day and I was super busy prepping. I was a bit more confident now that I finally had performed in front of a test audience. But as usual I am always still nervous no matter how much I prepe. Luckily for me in the morning I was getting last minute autographs and as I was getting Darker Than Black signed by Luci, I commented on Anime Idol and she said break a leg! I had given her an Ochaco mug as a gift which made her SUPER happy 😊! I felt much more confident after that and I went to the Main Events hall happily soon after.

Anime Idol was really fun this year! There was some nervousness from the contestants but we all just got together and made some fun friendships! I'm so proud not only of Mama Trowa but also of the other contestants I mentored or was able to help feel less nervous. The winners did deserve it! It was a very good act! And as for myself, I advertised a bit and got some new people from the toku community to come watch the show! I even saw a Kamen Rider Geiz cosplayer who came to the show it was AWESOME! My bffs who were only there for Friday also came & a few Golden*Star members too I was just so happy and thankful! They really made my day! My bffs were dressed in Ghibli heroines and OMG they were lovely & we did a small Tik Tol together ^_^ it was fun!

After the show my new Golden*Star member came up to me and I legit almost cried cuz they were SUPER adorable and kind and they had prepared a Cecil Ajima merch box for me saying thanks for allowing them to join and that they look up to me as a mentor and friend and I'm so happy I had waterproof eyeliner that day cuz oh boy that hit me in the feels 😭! I love! I got them back tho, for initiation I got down on one knee and gave em a flower bouquet,haichews & a golden star balloon as a way to welcome them to the Utapri cosplay group! So now we have a lovely new Tokiya 😊 yay!

SATURDAY:

Ok so despite loosing one prop, Saturday was really fun! I finally debuted Poppy Pipopapo and I basically used the entire day to find video game character cosplayers and we got to dance with them! I was shooting a music video for People Game for Kamen Rider Ex-Aid Abridged ^u^! Everyone whom I asked to dance with me was excited for it and it was a blast! I loved being able to spread so much fun and positivity as Poppy :) it was a dream cosplay come true! I can't wait to pit the vid together ^^🌸💕🎼🎵🎶! Later at night, I ran into my new friend who is gonna be Tokiya (they were dressed as Eiichi & their bud was Kira from HE★VENS!) we spent a good 2 hrs taling about all our future plans with Golden*Star and their other friend was so impressed with how friendly our Utapri group was that they wanted to join ;w; it was actually really sweet💕

SUNDAY:

Was THE BIG DAY AT LAST. The very first time my Utapri cosplay group Golden*Star Cosplay would finally have our first meeting/photoshoot together as ST☆RISH & QUARTET NIGHT! And it went flawless like a dream! Guys, omg I hit a milliom dollar jackpot. I love this group so much 😭! Everyone was on time, we all worked together so well, the photoshoot went perfectly! And we livestreamed it! After the photos, we sang Reiji a Happy Birthday 🎁 cuz it was his character bday the day before & I bought cupcakes and fried chicken for everyone xD! Cuz that's what Shining Live said happened fffff. In the most complimentary way, I feel like this cast is so on point, we are all pretty much our characters xD! I thought managing an 11 member group would be too hard at first but we have all grown so close over this year & we all have so much love and respect for one another, we all just felt so natural hanging out, as of we had done this for years ;U; ! It was lovely!

We tried stalling saying goodbye cuz we didn't wanna leave ;///; but we had to. We are still planning to watch Maji Love Kingdom as a group when SentaiFilmworks gives the green light for theatrical releases. But for now we will work hard to make HolMat even better! I love them all and can't wait to keep working together to make more wonderful memories! See yall next con!

Worries

Summary: Chika was scared of an uncertain future.

Relationship: ChikaRiko

Word count: 1.3k

Link: AO3

Note: I’m gonna try and write more often so you might get short and jumbled stuff like this idk.

Chika loved having Riko in her arms. It was a lazy Saturday morning spent together in her room, days after their graduation. Cuddled up on her bed with Riko held close on her stomach between her legs, and head rested on top of Riko’s. Warm despite the air conditioner putting out cold air to fend off the coming summer’s heat.

Taking a deep breath, Chika relished in having Riko so close. The subtle smell of shampoo, the gentle weight on her body, and the subtle ring of Riko’s voice just quiet enough for her to hear. She dragged her hands back and forth along Tshirt clad sides.  Basking in the softness of it all, and the joy found in their shared presence. No big plans for a date, just an afternoon with each other. Happiness unique to being with Riko that Chika would never tire of.

It was happiness unique to moments spent alone with a girl Chika loved more than anything. Moments that she knew Riko cherished as much. Moments that she knew wouldn’t be possible once Riko left.

“You’re spacing out again.” Riko tilted her head back as she spoke. “You haven’t heard a thing I’ve said, have you?”

“Sorry.” Chika shook her head before scary thoughts could come back. She focused down at Riko’s eyes filled with worry. “I was thinking about something.”

Riko didn’t respond but kept her eyes focused. Letting the silence linger as she tried to get a read on emotions.

“What?” Chika scratched her cheek, knowing she couldn’t hide. If she learned anything in her year with Riko it was that masking fears wasn’t something she could do. Riko knew all there was to know about her, so Chika kept quiet and waited.

Riko shuffled in closer, her face inches from Chika’s. “What’s wrong?”

Chika’s first instinct was to deflect, but that wouldn’t lead to anything good, and she knew. “I wasn’t lying. I was thinking about some stuff.”

Riko hummed. “It wasn’t good stuff was, was it?”

Chika gripped at Riko’s shirt with jittery fingers, biting back her urge to brush the concern aside. “No.”

Another silence as Riko took her eyes from Chika’s. Looking away as she brought a hand to one of Chika’s arms at her side, giving gentle rubs. An attempt to coax something out, feeling the tightened grip.

Chika took a deep breath, steadying herself to continue. Her stomach did tumbles and mouth grew dry, attempting to bring up a topic that both hated. It was Riko, she could be open. There wasn’t a need to be strong anymore, no need to take things onto herself. It was a mantra Riko wouldn’t let her forget.

“I was thinking about graduation again.” Chika waited for an answer that never came, instead a hum. “How we aren’t going to be able to do stuff like this anymore. I’m not going to get to see you every day, or hold you like this when I want to.”

“We’ve already talked about this before,” Riko said, quiet.

“I know.” Chika swallowed, biting her lip to keep back cries she said she never would cry. At least not in front of Riko. “This is your dream. You’re going to be at an amazing school because you’re super amazing, and I’m going to support you one-hundred percent even if we are going to be far apart. I’ll still love you a whole bunch and make sure I can talk to you as much as possible.”

Riko sat up, back still to Chika, and still in her arms. “Thank you, Chika.”

“But.” Chika stopped herself. Wondering how far she could go. How much she could admit.

Riko broke herself from Chika, turning herself to face her, still sitting on the bed. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m just really sad.” Chika reached out for a hand that Riko was quick to provide, gripping hard to fight back tears. She couldn’t cry. “I know I’m being a baby, but I’m going to miss you so much.”

“You’re not being a baby.” Riko leaned in, placing a kiss to Chika’s cheek. “I’m sad about it, too.”

Chika was lost. Trying to find anything to say that might calm her shaking hands and a worrying Riko. It was an odd sensation, not being able to find the words to say. It came so naturally when with Aqours, being able to find happiness in any situation, even if at her own expense. With Riko, it should have been just as easy, but a lump in her throat prevented any words. What could she say to fight off the inevitable? After getting together, and falling so deeply, there was no hope found in the inevitable.

“Chika.” Riko brought her hands from Chika’s arms to her legs, giving the same gentle reassurance. “You remember what I was like when we first met, right?”

Chika nodded, remembering the scared girl she met on the dock. Someone wanting to run away from everything she found joy in. A girl that Chika fell for in a moment she would never forget.

“I was scared and ready to give up on my dreams.” Riko gave the first smile, kind and inviting. “I was going to quit piano, and I doubt I would have made any friends at school either, but you didn’t let me.”

“But you didn’t.” Chika’s will to speak was found in the gentle smile. Not enough to crack her own, but enough to fend away tears.

“And you know why, right?” Riko asked, sliding a hand up to Chika’s face, thumb rubbing a red cheek. “Becuase of everything you said to me. You were gorgeous, telling me that I should be a shining idol like you wanted to. I felt like I could do anything I wanted to  from listening to you.”

A small laugh as Chika sank into the touch. Chika didn’t speak, but the shaking shoulders stopped, and the lump in her throat gone.

“I realized I was in love with you when you left.”

“Really?” Chika asked, her hand clasped over Riko's on her cheek.

Riko nodded. “You’re so important to me Chika. I love you so much.”

“I love you so much, too,” Chika said, wondering what it meant. Why Riko was so insistent on her knowing something she’d never be able to forget. Their love was never something she questioned.

“Than why are you so scared?”

Riko leaned in, taking Chika off-guard. The kiss was deep, their hands clasped together on Chika’s face for as long as the kiss held. She was lost in it like every other kiss, savoring Riko's touch. There was desperation from Riko that Chika hadn’t known. The kiss pouring out everything Riko, making sure Chika understood.

They pulled apart, Riko glowing with a bright smile Chika had never seen before. The silence that held between them was gentle, and as Chika stared into Riko’s eyes, which conveyed thoughts with the same desperation the kiss did, she understood.

“I don’t know why.” Chika absently answered, caught up in a new side to Riko she loved as much as any other. “Because I know I’ll always love you a whole lot.”

Riko nodded, turning with her back to Chika and reclaiming her spot in the girl’s lap. Humming some subtle tune that she wasn’t sure had a name yet.

Chika didn’t wait, wrapping her head back around Riko’s waist and tugging in as tight as she could. A love found a year ago was now something she couldn’t imagine being without. If she thought about it, maybe that was where the fear came from, but it was an odd fear. That somehow it would weaken with a bit of distance. Chika was much too stubborn to let something like that happen. A little help from Riko the kick she needed.

Chika kissed at the top of Riko’s head. “So, what were you trying to tell me before?”

Riko shifted in closer, snuggling deeper into the firm grip. “I wanted to know what you thought of a new song I’ve been working on.”

Badboy!Chan

okay so i’ve had this idea in my google docs for a long time now

and for some reason i just never got around to completing it???

so i hope you all enjoy it because it’s been in here for months and its time for me to start posting more content on my blog

chan is basically known as the scariest man on the university campus

well maybe not the scariest

but defiantly the most intimidating guy you’ll ever meet

what really gives off his intimidating vibe is mainly all of the dark clothing and chains he’s seen wearing around campus

like he basically lives in ripped jeans, leather jackets, and dark tshirts

he has some pretty curly gray hair that looks really nice with his tan skin

omf imagine this

bad boy bang chan with an eyebrow piercing

omg i would live for that

if it wasn’t for the fact that almost every student was terrified of him

all the ladies would probably be pinning over him and probs some of the men too tbh bc chan is a looker

but anyways chan is lowkey kind of offended that everyone is too scared to talk to him because he really isn’t that bad of a guy

his whole life he just kind of grew up with this thought that everyone loved bad boys

thats basically what his high school days taught him

but it turns out that he didn’t really need to change from his normal cute self to this bad boy but it was a little too late for that because everyone already had this attitude that chan was not someone anyone should mess with

he has a couple good friends that don’t mind him for his personality like his roommate woojin who knows the real chan after living with him in a dorm for almost 3 years

and new freshman changbin who looks up to chan and tries to act like a bad boy too but according to everyone else he fails and is basically just like a small kitten

and then savage smarty pants minho who could really careless about wtf chan wears and does

as long as he isn’t doing something stupid or something that he’ll regret because minho really does care about him a lot but he’d never admit that publicly

woojin, minho, and changbin are really the only friends that chan has and even though he wishes people would stop looking down upon him for his outside appearance he really does love and cherish the friends that he has

so basically half way though every year the student body holds this big ass part to celebrate finishing their finals

and even though there really should be adult supervision the professors and administration could care less

so you can basically put the pieces together and figure what kind of shit goes down

ding ding ding

thats right

lots of horny teenagers and alcohol

chan and woojin would normally go together for a couple minutes before everything turns into chaos

but this year the decided that for some goddamned reason that they would stay for a little longer

mainly to make fun of the way some of the drunk students would dance or act stupid and stuff

minho decided to stay in and work on homework minho you nerd

and changbin had been invited off campus for the weekend by his best friend felix to go check out this new arcade that was just put in a mall strip in their hometown

and this is where you come in fellow reader

you were just a new transfer student who had just finished their first sophomore semester on a brand new campus

you had tagged along with your roommate and her friends to the campus party

and wow were you overwhelmed

you guys had arrived at the party just as the chaos had started

and basically almost everyone there was either already tipsy or just flat out wasted

you had tried your best to stay close to your roommate so you wouldn’t get lost

but the crowd of people was just so pushy and everyone was literally all over the place so you did end up getting separated

for the sake of trying to stay away from the madness you headed off to the side of a small bar table and sat down on one of the benches

there wasn’t a whole lot of people around there expect for a couple playing a shot game, the bartender sighing because he rather would be doing something else, and these two boys who didn’t look too much older than you

one with dyed blonde hair who wore a pair of black skinny jeans and a grey hoodie

the other in all black with a silver chain, grey hair, and a very hot eyebrow piercing

you ended up making eye contact with the later and his gaze on your own made your blood pulse

he look kinda intimidating with his outer appearance but his eyes looked soft and inviting

you looked away and broke eye contact with him and you were basically blushing as red as a ripe strawberry

after a few more minutes of you just sitting at the bar watching everyone having fun

this weird smelling boy walked right up in front of you and flashed you a gummy looking smile

his body smelled terribly of alcohol and you wanted nothing more than to get out of there knowing that something bad was gonna happen

but of course the boy just had to speak up and pull you away, asking you to dance with him

you wanted so badly to object his offer but his grip on your arm was strong and you weren’t exactly the strongest girl yourself

he pulled you into the crowd of students dancing and he too began to dance around you

well more like he was dancing on top of you

you just kind of stood there as stiff as a pole and you were frozen in shock not knowing how to respond

it wasn’t until you felt him starting to grope your body when you tried slipping away

but he was too quick and held tightly onto your waist

you could feel him starting to slightly grind his body against yours and you were like

“yep this is how im gonna die”

you kindly asked the man to stop but he didn’t answer you so you got a little bit louder until you were basically yelling at him to stop

and then you felt him being ripped off your body

you were confused for a second and then turned around to see what exactly was happening

there was the boy who had been harassing you lying on the ground as the very attractive gray haired boy from the bar had his fist raised

the boy on the ground was huddled into fetal position with a red mark on his cheek

everyone around you turned to see what all the yelling was about and stopped to watch as your savior continued to beat up the boy

he only stopped once he saw your terrified eyes looking at him

he cursed to himself and looked to the boy on the ground back over to you before walking up to you and asking if you were okay

you stared at him in shock because wow this boy was even prettier up close

but also he did just beat the shit out of a boy on the ground

asshole deserved it

you nodded your head quickly and thanked him

you noticed as the grey haired boy suddenly started to become nervous and flustered as he rubbed the back of his neck

“c-can i walk you back to your dorm,,,,,you know,,,,in cause something else happens”

he suddenly would look less and less of a bad boy and more as a soft little lamb

you gave him a cute innocent smile and agreed to allow him to walk you back

he hesitantly reached for your hand and walked you back into the direction of the bar where the blonde boy stood smirking at the two of you

gray haired boy leaned over and whispered something in the blonde’s ear before leading you away, the blonde boy whistling behind him

you watched as the gray haired boy flushed pink

once you were a good feet away from the party the gray haired boy let go of your hand and apologized

you shook your head and told him there was no need to be sorry

the whole walk home he basically talked to you about how much he hates parties but was only there to watch the people for entertainment

you learned that his name was chan and that he was kind of known as this intimidating bad boy on the campus

but you were like ??? i don’t see it??? especially after how cute and flustered he was acting around you

and you too felt the need to tell him a little bit about you like what your name was and how you were a new transfer student and that you lost your roommate in the crowd and stuff

chan acted a little sympathetic towards you and then with a smile offered to show you around campus sometime

and of course you agreed because honestly who wouldn’t agree to spending the day with a really attractive man

and with that you arrived at your dorm

but you didn’t part ways without getting his number first,,,

everything after that seemed to escalate pretty quickly

you didn’t really understand why people chose to be afraid of chan without getting to know him first because he was truly a really sweet guy

you also become pretty close friends with woojin and changbin

it took minho a little bit to warm up to you but according to chan he’s just a pretty cautious guy who would do anything for his friends

besides chan you probably got along with changbin the best with both of you having a mutual admiration for chan

apparently you were pretty oblivious to the way chan treated you

according to woojin’s words chan was absolutely whipped for you

and you didn’t really believe it at first because why would chan like this average college student who couldn’t even afford to buy ramen

but it turns out that woojin was right

chan started doing little things in hopes of making you fall for him and understand his feelings

like he would go out of his bad boy character to the flower shop down the road and buy you cute little daisies

which you really admired and appreciated

after a couple months of pining after you and woojin practically forcing him to declare his undying love for you he finally confessed

he took you to the local coffee shop and told you everything he felt

and lucky for him you returned his feelings

bad boy chan as a boyfriend would be so cute omg

he would be pretty protective over you and always offer to walk you to your classes even though it would make him late to his own

which he didn’t mind because the teachers already expected that out of him

he would always lend you his hoodies and leather jackets if you got cold

and omg they would be large on you and his heart would melt at the way they just seemed to swallow you whole

you were the best thing that had ever happened to chan and he loved that you weren’t quick to judge him for his appearance

and you accepted him for who he was and made him feel like he didn’t have to look dark and menacing for people to like him

when he first introduced you to his family they immediate opened up to you

they loved how much you cherished and appreciated their son for who he was and the way he was

you found out from his little sister that you were the first girlfriend that her channie oppa had ever had

and he was a blushing mess as he tried to keep her quiet

you simpily giggled and kissed his cheek telling him that you felt honored to be big bad channie’s first girlfriend ;)

being with chan had really changed you just as you did with him

he no longer felt the need to hide his real self away from people and he actually made an attempt to talking to people first

which of course did freak them out because everyone still had this strange fear over him

but seeing chan with an average girlfriend did get people to warm up to him better

especially after they saw how sweet and caring he was towards you

and honestly bad boy chan would just be literally the best boyfriend ever i dare you guys to fight me on this

Stop Shop Girl Classy Sassy And A Bit Smart Assy Vintage shirt

Bauer weighs 18 pounds Stop Shop Girl Classy Sassy And A Bit Smart Assy Vintage shirt . And 6 ounces he had his Lovenox lab today. Carly did a great job getting his blood! She is 2 for 2. He didn’t even cry. They increased his dosage on Monday evening, and his results were better today; however, it is still too low. Our will bring a shipment at 10pm tonight with the increased Lovenox amount. Our home health nurse replaced his insuflon catheter when we got back this evening. We place numbing cream on his leg an hour before she arrives.And he never even knows when it is inserted. Three major holidays take place during December. Members of the African-American culture often celebrate Kwanzaa. Those of the Jewish faith observe Hanukkah. Both of these holidays span over the course of an entire week, but most Americans in the United States celebrate Christmas on December 25th. Stop Shop Girl Classy Sassy And A Bit Smart Assy Vintage shirt, hoodie, sweater, longsleeve and ladies t-shirt

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Classic Men's People of all walks participate in numerous traditions that surround their Each holiday traditionally observes certain activities and most families have created their own special versions Stop Shop Girl Classy Sassy And A Bit Smart Assy Vintage shirt .There are a several things in common with the three holidays mentioned above. People take the time to love and cherish their family and friends. Gifts are purchased and made to give one another. Each holiday traditionally observes certain activities and most families have created their own special In fact, my grandmother was known as Annette for her entire entrepreneurial life as a co-founder of the well-known real estate business in NY called “Big Chief Lewis” that she had with my And final fun fact: Saint Crispin and Saint Crispinian were actually two famous shoemaking brothers of Rome, Italy in the 3rd Century. Every child is special to Santa. Every child has its own story. And every child sees Santa as someone who they can always rely on.Nick himself said at the festivities. Well, I’m happy to be back on Facebook, after Facebook decided on Christmas Day that I was not Santa Claus and that I did not live in North Pole, Alaska despite having copies of my valid US Passport and Alaska Driver License that proved I was and arbitrarily locked me out. You Can See More Product: https://tshirt-trend.com/product-category/trending/ Read the full article

Damn I️ obviously didn’t write this but thank you so much to the person that did like this was amazing! Thank you so much to yunhojaeboo!!!

I found this…

we love you so much…. i have a story like this……. Long time ago, somewhere in Korea, a 15 year old boy bid goodbye to the city that had raised him, he gathered up a few pieces of luggage, said goodbye to 8 sisters and 2 parents who loves him deeply, he got on the train to Seoul, his family cried at the sight of his back walking away, the boy heard his loved ones crying for him, but he was afraid to look back, because he knew if he looked back, he wouldn’t have the heart to leave, but he didn’t want to throw away his dream, plus he didn’t want his family to see his tears. Just like that, with a very thin jacket in a freezing winter, for the sake of his dream, the boy left his home town for the first time in 15 years, to a big city he’s only seen in his dreams. Finally, the train has stopped, the boy got off of the train, as he looked at this strange yet fancy city and all its glory, busy streets, limelights, he’s never seen anything like this before. He felt his heart grow weak because it was so overwhelming. Really.. can he really find his place in a city like this? The boy hesitated, his faith was shaken. But, the dream he has in his heart can’t die, if he just goes home like this, he’ll never forgive himself for being such a weak coward, so, without any help or anyone, the boy found himself an apartment the size of a tuna can.. and call it home. SM Entertainment, the biggest music entertainment company held its second singing contest, the boy went, in the lobby, he saw so many other boys are that just like him, hoping to get picked through his contest so they can be on their way to a great singer, all the boys were well dressed, they were wearing the hippest clothes, with high-end mp3 players in their ears as they practice. The boy looked down on his plain grey tshirt and jeans, he felt like he has already lost half of the battle. He was contestant number 12, he walked into the audition room, there sits 5 stone cold expressionless judges, he was a nervous, until a judge asked him to open his mouth and sing. Just like that, his voice touched everyone in the room, that voice, was by the far the purest, the softest they’ve heard, when you listen to his voice, you can’t help but feel this sadness and tons of emotions, but even so, you want to continue to listen to his voice, forever and forever, just be loss in the sound of his voice. But still, his voice was too soft, too weak. The reason the boy won the contest because he has a flawless face, perfect skin, long eyelashes, delicate features that are even prettier than a girl’s, big watery eyes, pouty lips, and that white as snow skin. They said his face was born to be in the entertainment business. He got signed by SM, with a 7 year contract, two years of training, he has to pay for all of his music, dancing and other classes. The next five years he would actually become an entertainer, seeing himself that much closer to his dream, the boy signed the contract, knowning in the next two years, his life will be extremely hard, hard like he’s never experienced before, but he knows this is his dream, so he can not give up. So he begun those two grueling years, he knew his family isn’t well off, so he’s never asked his parents for a penny, everyday he jumped in between 3 different jobs, *when everyone else was still sleeping, the printer will drop off a stack of newspaper that are as heavy as he is, he would ride an old bike and deliver those newspapers door by door. ~In the afternoon he would jump from construction site to construction doing temporary work, that gorgeous face is being covered those pounds of cement and dirt, he had to suppress his beautiful voice because he wanted to be liked by his superior. After his music lessons early afternoon, in order to save a few dollars, he walks 3 hours to his waitressing job at a restaurant, he quietly does his job, quietly takes on everything a 15 year shouldn’t. quietly doing everything he can to get through these two rough years. All for the day he will be surrounded by bright lights. The boy did everything he could, but he still couldn’t manage three meals a day, every time he gets his salary, the first he does is pays for his lessons, even if the left over isn’t nearly enough for him to eat or buy any clothes. Finally one day, the boy realized he didn’t have anymoney left for food, he had been starving for two days, his weak body shouldn’t even be walking, but with the pressure of he has to pay for his classes, he still went to work. That night, when he was cleaning a table at the restaurant, he saw a customer has left more than half bowl of his noodle soup, it was still hot, he couldn’t take the hunger anymore, his hands were shaking.. he picked up a spoon and started to eat the left over noodles.. huh. He wonders why it starts to taste so salty.. then he realized it was his tears.. has dropped down in the bowl w/o him realizing. One the day, the boy got sick, he was running a high fever, he laid in his tiny little apartment for three straight days, thank god he already paid for his lessons, but he’s short 3 days worth of pay, so once again, the boy dragged his fragile body, walked three hours to his restaurant job. On the way back, he saw a blood donating booth, his stomach growled at him, the boy once again did something he didn’t want to.. he walked inside.. after an hour, he came out with a few bills in his hand, dragged his lifeless body into a store and bought the cheapest pack of cracker there is. Finally, he got through these two years, he was chosen to be in a group of five, the company have announced that this is going to be one of the best group of all times. Even though the five boys are very different, but the company believe that together, they will be perfect. The boys thought he was so lucky to be chosen in such a group, at the same time, being the oldest, he got four younger “brothers” who adores him. When they put out their first EP, even though there are only two songs on there, they topped the charts in Korea, also broke the fact that EP doesn’t sell well in Korea, the boy finally got a taste of success, as he sees more and more fan letters everyday, he knew everything in the past two years was worth it. But nothing’s perfect, good times are always short, it’s cruel actually. The first time they held their fan meeting, the people that came were fans of other members, watching lines of fans lined up in front of other members, there’s not even a single soul in front of him self, he wanted to scream and cry, The crew members didn’t want to make things weird, so they dragged a few fans in front of the boy. The boy held his sadness, starting talk to the female fan girl. But the fan girl coldly threw him “ I was forced to stand in your line, I don’t even like you”.. his heart was shattered again. But he didn’t cry, he rather bit his lip and let it bleed, but he doesn’t want to cry in front of anyone. Esp himself. The boy didn’t know why the fan didn’t like him, but what he doesn’t know is that his fans were still waiting outside the building b/c the meeting room was full.. their hearts were shattering along with his. Once he found out online that it’s not that others don’t like him nor he did anything wrong, but because he’s just too pretty.. even the girls are jealous.. reading this silly gibberish, the boy chuckled. He never gave up, everyday he puts on his sincere smiley face to public, hoping and praying that others will see him for who he really is, hear his voice. But the harder he try the more pressure he felt. Whenever he makes a mistake during performances, it makes him nervous, because he’s scared that others will dislike him even more b/c of it. So little by little. The boy stopped smiling in front of the camera, watching his every action and words. But because of it, the fans were chatting he’s pretending to be too cool, so the company should consider switching him out.. he was seriously scared, he didn’t want leave this place that was practically his 2nd home, but he understand that he’s just a “body” that makes money for the company, if the consumers are tired of this body, then the company must switch the body out for new one. He didn’t get switched, he found out that his fans roamed the streets in his honor for days, begging the company to keep him in the group. Also, the maknae of the group, changmin, despite what the manager forbids him to do, begged in front of the camera, that if the company takes the boy away, he will tear up his contract and go back to being a high school student. The boy cried, he knows that everyone in this group has a passion for music, Changmin the youngest, just like him, has gone through hardship to get to where he is today. The boy cherished everything he has even more, he begins to practice harder and harder, to thank his fans, also he wanted to show his best to his fans that loves him. During concerts, the boy always looks around in the audience, the director said that looks funny when he sings, said it’s better for the singer to stare at one particular spot when he sings, but he can’t do that, because he wants to see the face of every single fan out there, even if the picture captured of him was ugly, he doesn’t care. Once during dance practice, the boy fell.. he thought it was normal to fall when dancing. But this time he couldn’t get back, his knees was hurting like crazy, he balled up and started shaking in the corner of the room, the leader, Yunho, w/o saying a word, carried the boy on his back and took him to the nearest hospital, at the split second that the emergency room door was closing, the boy saw four familiar figures on the other side of the door. Worrying for him, praying for him. The doctor said his right knee is pretty much gone, he needs surgery asap and it’s a major surgery so he needs to rest for a long time post-op, but the boy refused, the 2nd day after his surgery, he arrived at the Seoul Olympic stadium with the rest of the members, like his schedule, he met with his fans, before the meeting, Yunho was by his side all the time, didn’t leave his side for even a second. During the fan meet, they asked what does Changmin want for new years, Changmin’s answer “ I wish for hyung to get better soon” The boy hates crying, he looked down, tried his hardest not to let his tears fall, he finally looked at the fans, he saw them crying for him, his heart was breaking, he picked the microphone and said “ I’m not hurting at all, really, please don’t cry for me, let’s face each other with smiles, please?” this is the first the boy has lied to everyone, it was within 24 hours of his surgery, how can it not hurt? But he toughed it out, for the love he has for his fans. He finally recovered, he celebrated with his friends, on the drive home, he was pulled over by the police for drinking and driving, Yunho came to pick him up at the police station w/o a word, but the boy knew he has disappointed Yunho and others. The boy was kept in silence by the company for two weeks, he knows that this is actually the lightest punishment for his foolish actions, and he knew his member have begged the company many many times, so that he’s not going to get kicked out. Because of it. He insisted in the next fan meet, he will apologize to everyone. That was the first time the boy has shed tears in front of his fans, .. when his fans said that they forgive him and they still love him. The boy started to get more and more popular, people started seeing him for more than just a gorgeous face, he’s a passionate musician with a beautiful voice and he’s a brave soul who isn’t afraid to face his mistakes. Three simple words “ we forgive you ” from the fans gave him all the faith he needed to carry on. This boy, is Kim JaeJoong, a member of the hottest group in Korea. DBSK. The company gave him the stage of name of YoungWoong Hero JaeJoong. So whenever the boy wants to cry, he reminds himself he can’t.. because he’s Hero JaeJoong and a Hero doesn’t cry.. a hero will fight ‘til the end and win the battle. Once a DBSK fan said that the first time she saw JaeJoong, she thought his name couldn’t possibly be Hero because it didn’t suit his fragile image, but she knows now why his name is Hero, because underneath his beauty, lies the soul of a true hero.

Funny Star Wars Shirts & Tees for Men, Women & Kids | Memories of Star Wars

If you're looking for original, unique, attractive, one-of-a-kind funny Star Wars tshirts for men, women and children, you've come to the right place. Our chief designer and creative force has been a Star Wars dork for decades, and it's reflected here in some of his humorous, satirical designs for the genre. But wait, as they say, there's more! Yes, Mann has more such work soon to be available. In the meantime, we hope you enjoy what you see here, and like it enough to share it and even buy it (hint, hint).

HAND SOLO's Dirty Little Secret....

THE FARCE has Awakened...

Storm Trooper Marksmanship. Wow.

A Long Time Ago, In A Movie Theater Far, Far Away... or, How It All Began for Mann.

Our resident artist was a lucky kid. Even though his parents worked in more or less mainstream professions, he had friends whose parents were employed in Tinsel Town. Through these connections, he sometimes got advance information on upcoming movies, and even the chance to see them before anybody else. That same year, he heard about Star Wars through another young friend whose mother worked in "the biz." He was able to see advance press materials on it, and even got his hands on a limited edition full color promotion package, which he cherished for years and which would probably be worth some very nice coin today, if it still existed (sadly, it was lost long ago). Later, he heard more from another kid whose father worked on Steven Spielberg's Close Encounters of the Third Kind, and who saw to it that our young artist got to tour the production offices (an experience so powerful and formative, it may well have changed Mann's life and career path (and arguably, not for the better)). To our young artist, Close Encounters looked pretty cool... but nothing, seemingly, could compare to Star Wars. And then, somewhere along the way, seeing one movie or another, Mann experienced the first trailer for what would become his favorite movie of all time (at least for many years), and that was that! Star Wars was the film by which all others would be measured. Mind blown, for the young man interested in both movie making and stories of wonder, the wait for the film's arrival was excruciating torment, exacerbated by growing media interest and endless teasers, of one form or another, showing up everywhere. The young Mann was among the first owners of Star Wars shirts in all of Los Angeles, including one with the old, disused early-version logo and another with the infamous Brothers Hildebrandt poster, long since fallen away to dust.

Hollywood Blvd. and Mann's Chinese Theater, the way it looked, May 1977, during the opening days of Star Wars. Notice that the crowd is so big, it has spilled out onto the main drag. Somewhere in there may well be the young Mann and his friends... look closely! More importantly, however, Mann was lucky enough to see George Lucas' epic at the world famous Mann's Chinese Theater during it's opening week in... OMG... wait for it... May of 1977! Yeah, like we said: A long time ago... To be clear, the Mann theater operation had absolutely nothing to do with the young artist who would later be known by that same moniker (though he wished then and still does that it did). It was, in retrospect, just a strange coincidence. And it didn't help in any way with obtaining tickets! :-(

The Night After Opening Night...

Mann had to stand in line just like everybody else. The only saving grace was that the line standing began on a weekday afternoon when demand, while still high, did not necessarily require camping out. For those unfamiliar with such ancient rites, in those days of yore, weeks worth of showings were not sold out in minutes online. Once upon a time, you actually had to and could show up at the box office, wait your turn and secure some tickets. People who were willing to put in the time and burn a little shoe leather (or tennis shoe rubber, as the case may be), actually had the advantage back then. Imagine that.

Mann's Chinese Theater – but not Mann's – the way he remembers it from the Star Wars release period (1977), as seen from Hollywood Blvd. Unfortunately, Mann didn't get to see Star Wars opening night. Snif. But he did almost as well. School was winding down and the parents of friends who understood the nearly out of control excitement of their son and his friends (Mann among them) arranged to take the group for a showing on day two of it's run. Mann was just a young kid then (as opposed to an old one now), and otherwise pretty mature for his age. But leaving the burbs and going to Hollywood to see the film on a big screen with great sound – the day after the big premiere, no less – was almost more than he could stand. The entire experience left an indelible mark on his psyche, soul and sanity which impacts him to this day. Within a few months, by the summer of 1977, the movie was playing widely across all of Southern California, and you didn't have to go far to see it. For example, it was running continuously at a shopping mall not far from Mann and his friends, which made it possible for them to see it over and over and over again... It's hard for a lot of people to imagine today, but Star Wars played theatrically across most of North America for OVER A YEAR! It was unprecedented at the time, and still represents a phenomena which will almost certainly never be duplicated – if for no other reason than we live in a time wherein movies are available for view weeks after release. It's really amazing when you think about it. Even six months after it's premiere, you could say: "Hey, I wanna go see Star Wars," and it was not impossible. You could get in your car – or, if you were Mann and his friends, hop the bus or deploy the ten speeds – and go to the not-too-distant metroplex. Odds were it was still playing in the main cinema, too. And if you were particularly sneaky, you could even figure out a way to see it several times on the same day. Not that we're saying Mann did such a thing – just that it was theoretically possible! There was one constant though, for many months: you didn't go on a Friday or Saturday night, because of the damn lines!

More of the crowd thronging Grauman's Chinese Theater during the premiere of Star Wars. In the background is the famous Roosevelt Hotel, where many a dignitary and star has stayed down through the decades. Marilyn Monroe is said to still reside there. Spooky, right? During that long, hot summer of '77, Mann would drag everyone he knew to see the movie, including his "very boring, conservative parents," who didn't quite know what to make of the film or, it became increasingly clear, of him. His father, he later learned, had at least some basis for understanding the film, having read the pulps as a kid. But as for his poor sainted mother... well, let's just say she thought The Wizard of Oz a bit too bizarre. By comparison, Star Wars was a personal affront and attack on all that was sacred and holy and... well... just... normal.

One Star Wars T-shirt Which Led to A Lifetime of Star Wars Shirts...

CLICK HERE to Read More… To say that Star Wars was an international hit and global cultural phenomena would be the understatement of all time. It was so big, it spawned everything from the obligatory Star Wars tshirts and posters, to toys, lunch boxes, collector cards, comic books, calendars, etc., etc., etc.. Like many of us, Mann wishes he'd A) kept his memorabilia, and B) kept it in primo shape. It would be worth a small fortune today. Mann's first "movie t-shirt" was also his first official piece of Star Wars merch. It was the now world-famous painting by the great Brothers Hildebrandt, who would later go onto much fame, fortune and glory, and serve as ongoing artistic inspirations for the young Mann. Their shirt was only the first of many Star Wars shirts, but by far not the last.

The pre-release original Star Wars promotional poster, painted in 36 insane hours by the Brother Hildebrandt, who would become major artistic influences on the young Mann. He also wore out his shirt with the same artwork… three times! Now, for the kids out there, if you didn't know already, this was an era (gasp) some years before video tape, a decade before CDs and decades before movies on demand. There was no Blockbuster or Netflix. The way it worked back in those days was (gasp) – when a movie closed, that was it! Period. It was gone, for all intents and purposes, forever. You might… I say, might… pick it up at a film festival or possible revival some years in the future. You couldn't realistically expect a mega-hit like Star Wars to be on TV any time soon. I mean, we're talking years. So… Fuggedaboudit. Disney (which would later buy out George Lucas and end up owning not just one but two of the greatest movie franchises of all time (Star Wars and Indiana Jones)) was known, in those days, for doing what other studios generally did not do. That being, re-releasing their classics every five years or so, so that every age group would have fond memories of Cinderella and Bambi, and be sure to bring the next generation a few iterations down the road. Mann remembers sobbing, as a young boy, during one such re-release of Bambi. And it was all damn smart marketing, of course. But nobody had any expectation that 20th Century Fox would do the same with Star Wars, so it was imperative for the devoted fan to see it as many times as possible during it's initial (and likely only) run.

Formative Life Experiences: Girls, Cars and Star Wars (Not Necessarily In That Order)

CLICK HERE to Read More... For one movie to be readily viewable at the local theater for an entire year, when most movies were gone in, at best, a month or two, was quite the thing. Two years earlier, another one of Mann's formative favorites, Jaws, had had crowds lined up around the block too. It was, for a few short years, the biggest blockbuster of all time, and the one by which everything else was measured. In fact, the term "blockbuster" was put into common use by the long, box office busting run of Jaws. But the lines and showings faded out within a few months. Star Wars seemed to go on forever and ever and ever...

If you wanted to see Star Wars in the summer of 1977, you got used to lines like this... My friends and I joked that Star Wars would be the first movie in history to be showing somewhere in every big town, on continuous loop, forever... The ubiquity of the film meant young dorks like our insane genius could see Star Wars multiple times over a period of many months. Being a teenager then, he was old enough that he didn't have to drag anyone along with him, either. Young Mann saw Star Wars over 30 times – quite a few times by himself – during that year long period. It got to the point where he could recite entire sections from memory! And he would have seen it more but, sigh... allowance only went so far. Most of his family, of course, thought he was absolutely insane – an opinion that many still hold. And perhaps he was. He had no inkling back then, as a budding artist, that his "insanity" would hold him in good stead, and that one day he'd work on Lucasfilm projects as a professional, or design funny Star Wars tshirts for other fans decades later.

Cosplay? Maybe. But fan boys? Clearly, yes! This line is probably for Return of the Jedi in 1983, but it shows the kind of fanatic dedication to Star Wars found in those days (note E.T. tshirt in background; the film came out in 1982.) Despite it all, Mann's final watch tally paled in comparison to that of other even more hard core devotees (i.e. other young lunatics). He later had a frenemy who bragged about seeing Star Wars over 100 times during that same period. Now that, Mann commented recently, tongue in cheek, "seemed a tad bit obsessive." But given the time, it was understandable too. If you were a dork in those days, you knew you might never see Star Wars again till your kids were in college, and all you would have to go by was your old, worn-out Star Wars shirts and fond recollections. It was best to top off the memories as much as possible, as they were all you would have for many years to come.

The trip to the video store is no more... Well, market forces and technology changed everything in the ensuing years. By the time of the release of Return of the Jedi in 1983 (a shocking six years after Star Wars; it was originally going to be called "Revenge of the Jedi" and released in 1980), video tape was making it's impact all across America. People were theoretically able to own their own copies of Star Wars movies and watch it whenever they wanted, in the comfort of their own homes! Of course, this was pragmatically impossible for most, as actually buying commercially recorded movies in those days was prohibitively expensive. Getting your hands on movies was what the local video store was for. Parenthetically, this was a time of great panic for the movie business, as it was believed that "home viewing" would kill theaters. The same fears were floated (even more so) when DVD arrived. Ironically, overall, the new technologies actually increased public interest, gave the studios a means to monetize their enormous back catalogues (which had never really existed before), and in general, made the studios more money, and more consistent money, too. Instead of living and dying by their latest films, the big, well-known studios had a source of ongoing revenue. Who knew that video tape would force them to change their business model – kicking and screaming the entire way – to something even better? The relentless march of technological progress would continuously bring the price of actually owning a movie down. The arrival of video disks, followed by DVDs and then Blu-Ray, made it possible. But streaming services and ultimately, video on demand, have made owning a movie unnecessary. Taken together, it all ultimately spelled the end of that long-time staple of American life, the video store, for good. Yes, kids, another whole business category time and technology has wiped out. For Mann, the "Star Wars experience," such as some have characterized it, was profound. Luckily or unluckily, our artist came of age when George Lucas' fervid imagination and blockbuster films were a powerful force on both the culture and the collective imagination. For a guy like Mann, it's all inextricably tied to seminal life events, like graduations and girlfriends, first jobs and cars, the early phases of adulthood and the departure from childish things. To some extent, anyway. The girlfriends, the cars, the jobs – even most of the buddies are vanished to the mists of time – but the love of Star Wars lingers on. It probably always will...

Some Guys Get "The Force" – Other's Get "The Farce" – And It Is With Them, Always...

Mann shudders when recounting all the different ways he has "bought the whole farm, manure and all" more than once, and is sure the evil genius behind it all, George Lucas, has laughed all the way to the bank – repeatedly! There were the innumerable versions and editions of the Star Wars saga, on tape, video disk, DVD, Blu-ray... not to mention all the other related memorabilia... many thousands of dollars worth, at least...

The three young stars of Star Wars, with imperial escort, unaware of what the future will bring. For years, Harrison Ford seemed embarrassed by his role (he doesn't look too happy here), but went on to great stardom. Poor Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher (RIP) were forever typecast, though she seemed to suffer the most from it all, at least personally. Today, Mann's enthusiasm for Star Wars has waned considerably; the inevitable result of the distance of years, decades of life experience and, as Mann is pained to say, what he would consider very bad creative choices made by Lucasfilm over the course of time. Many highly personal Star Wars-related memories, good and bad, which we've only touched on here, don't change his fundamental love for the pastiche science-fantasy universe of George Lucas. Yes, it's difficult to feel great affection when still smarting, decades later, over the existential and unforgivable threats of so-cute-I-might-puke ewoks and an entire race of Rastafarian gungans, or forgive such transgressions. It may even explain his "The Farce" series of tees, and other somewhat caustic, satirical Star Wars-inspired designs. But despite it all, the unrequited love lives on... Or maybe Mann's just fixated on getting back at George Lucas for "the slight" all those years ago. But that's a long Seinfeldian tale of bitter Hollywood resentment and revenge, better left for another time... Read the full article

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