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pettyprocrastination · 1 year

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whoever this beloved anon was I am so touched by your kindness! You definitely didn’t have to do this but I am so happy you enjoy this idea and I will happily expand upon it for you!

this is just a collection of word vomit bullet points for the time being but I will happily answer any and all questions about this pair!!

warnings: violence, angst, child death (Sarah Miller), foul language, the same warnings that apply to tlou, reader is Sarah's mom and described as having similar features to her.

So the general Idea is that you and Joel are happily married before the outbreak.

You had been Sarah's mother, his high school sweetheart he got pregnant when neither of you were old enough to have any reaction to the pregnancy test other than a fucking panic attack in one another’s arms. but you made it work

you both worked but made time for one another and your sweet girl, going to museums every other weekend and joel insisting on swooping you off for a date every now and then

nothing special. He knows you’re more of a diner gal than anything too fancy that makes you both feel out of place.

On his birthday in 2003, you had planned to tell him that you were pregnant again. But the memories of your own fears of motherhood from all those years ago begin to swirl through your head again and you get cold feel. deciding to tell him the morning after

it is his birthday afterall, you want to focus on him.

but when you’re woken up in the middle of the night because tommy needs to get bailed out, Joel kisses you sweetly one last time before promising he’ll be back and you can’t shake the feeling that something bad is happening.

its you that shakes sarah awake that night. shouting at her to put on her shoes when she’s still rubbing the sleep from her eyes because you’ve been listening to the radio for the past two hours, calling joel again and again and again praying for him to fucking pick up but to no avail.

Sarah, bless your little girl’s bleeding heart is the one who insists you check on the adler’s against your better suspicions and when you find the eldest looming over her daughter, blood and sinew dripping from her mouth, you grab your daughter hand and burst into a full sprint until something slams into your back and sends you tumbling onto their front lawn

its how joel finds you, struggling to keep the once sweet old woman, whose now nothing more than dead eyes and gnashing teeth straining to snap at your pulse point as you push against her while sarah shrieks before your husband runs forward and cracks her skull with a wrench.

there’s hardly a moment of pause, just enough for him to pull you up and into his arms before he’s ushering you both into the car with an urgency.

when the truck crashes, you get separated from them. Perhaps at Tommy’s side when the flames rise and create a wall, separating you from your husband, or maybe pulled into the mob of chaos when trying to escape from those already infected-

all joel knows is that you promise you’ll find him: just get sarah to safety and you’ll meet him at the river

Poor thing is already so frightened, held in her father’s arms with tears streaming down her face insisting they can’t leave you they just can’t but her father kisses her forehead and reassures her its going to be okay

“we just need to be brave, okay babygirl? Your mama’s real tough, she’s gonna be alright.”

he isn’t sure if he’s saying it to his daughter or himself.

but when he comes to the river you aren’t there. Only a soldier who points a gun at the scared little girl in his arms and then he loses everything

its when the light is gone from his daughter’s eyes that he realizes. His voice cracked and raw from sobbing that he looks around to see his brother with drawn in shoulders and tears in his eyes but his wife is nowhere to be found.

Tommy says you got lost in the chaos. Everything was so loud, so sudden that he turned around and suddenly you weren’t there.

Joel wants to go back but its Tommy that stops him, that dulls the red in his vision to a sad faded pink because his brother points at the orange horizon not too far from them, so much of the city is already in flames.

“We’re gonna find her, but not there.”

So Joel searches. for the first year spent in the world post-outbreak its all he did.

He became a smuggler because of it.

Information came at a price and he needed to be able to fucking pay it, whether it be in blood or ration cards. He was willing to do anything to find you or any thin thread that lead your way.

But it’s Tommy that asks him to give up. Not in those words of course.

The youngest Miller knows better than to say something so cruel that would make his brother, the only person he has in this world turn on him.

But his voice is worried when he asks him one night in Boston when he hasn’t even had the chance to wash the blood from his knuckles

“You think she would have wanted this for you?”

the fight that followed his words was brutal. Vicious insults and scarred fists slamming against each brother until they're both too tired and bloody to continue. Each leaning against a wall for support and Tommy’s wavering voice breaking the silence.

“I don’t know where she is, Joel. But I do know you're gonna get yourself killed if you keep lookin’ for her.”

All he can do is nod.

It’s a few days later when he meets Tess. Who has heard plenty of stories about the elder miller’s brutality and wants him to put that muscle to good use for some extra profit.

It begins his new life. One that empty and cold but one he can live.

Until of course, Ellie comes along. The sweet and incredibly opinionated girl that makes him become something akin to the man he thought died twenty years ago.

its when he’s traveling with Ellie, that it happens. When a warm familiarity has settled between the two because so much blood and pain has been shared he can’t help but see her as something close, something bright even though all he can force himself to utter in her reference is “cargo”

when theyre traveling through the woods as Ellie chatters away, probing his memory about a movie that may or may not have existed thirty years ago because her descriptions of the plot are incredibly odd he hears a voice shout for them to stop and finds himself staring at a man- no, a boy- pointing a gun at them.

Ellie stills, but Joel can see enough to know that from the lanky figure and dimpled face that he’s young. Maybe twenty, twenty-two at the oldest, but his eyes dart from Joel to Ellie with a pinprick of fear that allows Joel the time to charge forward and slam him to the ground before wrestling the gun from his hands.

He has enough to time to tuck it under the stranger’s chin before he hears the sound of the safety being turned off and finds himself looking up and seeing a gun just inches from his face.

Joel’s head whips around when Ellie’s voice calls out his name in fear, he turns to see another stranger holding her a gun point, shoulders drawn back and a shadow cast over their face by the had obstructing their identity.

“You hurt one of mine, I hurt one of yours. That a fair deal?”

Its takes him a moment to recognize you. It’s been so long since he’s heard your voice, the sweet tease when you would poke at him each time he woke up late despite the fact that you reminded him to set his alarm the night before, the times you’d chide him with a harsh “Joel Miller!” whispered in public anytime he was able to grab you a bit too passionately to be appropriate in public but the laughter in your voice let him know you were never truly mad at him. You didn’t know how to be.

But that sweetness is buried under a cold rasp that cuts through the air as you point a rifle at the scared little girl in front of you.

“You think I won’t?” You’re older now, skin covered in scars from a life he didn’t know you got the chance to live and your eyes are cold as they regard your husband. “Put the gun down and get the fuck off of him, I won’t repeat myself.”

Joel mumbles your name in awe. The woman he loved, the woman he mourned the one he fought so hard to find stands before him like some sort of hallucination and suddenly the world feels like its spinning until you bark orders at him again.

“You’ve got five seconds Joel, make a fucking choice before I make it for you.”

He looks down and realizes the boy under him, the one with the bleeding nose and snarling face has your eyes and his dimples.

“One.”

The one above him has Sarah’s hair. Soft brown curls that shine under the sun.

“Two”

Wait. No, they both do.

“Three.”

Twins. Jesus fucking Christ you had twins.

“Four.”

Joel holds the rifle up above his head and the one boy standing snatches it from his grasp, tossing it to the ground and kicking it far from his reach. He slowly stands, allowing your son- dear god your son- to scramble to his feet.

Your voice softens just for a moment. “You okay, Duke?”

Blood stains the bottom half of his face from where Joel slammed his fist into the boy’s nose just moments before, but he nods nonetheless.

Now, they both stand on one side of you and he can see the resemblance clear as day the same way he would whenever Sarah was by your side.

When you order him to hand over his bag, he does so without question before telling Ellie to do the same.

She watches him with wide eyes, her hands still up in the air but gaping at her companion as if he had grown a second head.

“Joel!” “Just do it, alright?”

He doesn’t miss the way you watch their interaction with narrowed eyes until she tosses her bag to you and you slowly lower your gun.

“Now, you want to tell me what the fuck you think you’re doin’ at my home?”

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #i had an idea of something similar for tommy but on outbreak night he uh. abandons you instead of getting separated from you #because. angst :D #people say nice things #this was incredibly generous of you anon thank you so so much!#i may get myself a little starbucks drink this week now because I havent had starbucks since like january 1st lol #joel reeling from taking in all this information and also realizing he suckerpunched HIS OWN KID #id like to apologize for all the grammatical issues with this. this is just a bulletpoint word vomit to get my thoughts on the page before-#-beginning the actual fic. also I have to do a midterm tonight and this is my treat to myself hehe #but yes. joel getting separated from his wife on outbreak night and having to accept that shes probably dead #meanwhile youve lived this entire life without him because you think HES dead ad raising your boys all on your own #which just- further digs into his insecurities about failing in his role as a protector #he couldn't save sarah. he can't save ellie and he couldn't even save you #he thinks about you pregnant and alone. fending for yourself in a world full of infected and raiders and his chest grows tight again #this is all followed by Ellie going >:O 'you KNOW THIS PSYCHO?'and then joel immediately snapping at her to WATCH HER MOUTH #because that kid has no filter and he has to explain that youre his wife #anyways joels wife is a badass mfer who also maybe has a little garden and some chickens that you and your boys take care of <3 yeah .#reunion tag #ill be using that for this specific couple because I dont have a fic title yet but if anybody has suggestions!

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wikiangela · 7 months

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wip wednesday

tagged by @jesuisici33 @callaplums @daffi-990 @loserdiaz @thewolvesof1998 @disasterbuckdiaz @fortheloveofbuddie 💖💖

made a bit of progress on the sick fic so here it is🤷

prev snippet

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“Maybe we should get you to a doctor.” Buck muses, wrapping the blanket over Eddie’s shoulders.

“I don’t need- I just closed my eyes for a second. I’m fine.” he grumbles, fumbling with the blanket too long to want to actually throw it off, but he does in the end – he’s cold and refuses to admit it, and he’d rather sit here and pretend he’s fine. He’s impossible.

“Eddie, that cough did not sound fine.” he points out.

“Buck-” he sneezes, and then wraps the sleeves of his hoodie over his palms. Buck raises his eyebrow, and Eddie pointedly avoids his eyes, as he not-so-discreetly wipes his nose with a sleeve.

“I bought tissues.” Buck reaches for the bag and digs out a box, then tries to give it to Eddie, who, instead of taking it, just levels him with a stare, as he sniffles loudly, and swipes a sleeve under his nose again. “Seriously? You’re gonna be gross and disgusting just to prove you’re not sick?” That’s a new level of stubborn Buck hasn’t seen from Eddie yet. He can’t believe this is the man his heart decided it wants. And that even while sick and gross and stubborn and ridiculous, a part of Buck is still endeared by him.

“I’m not.” Eddie insists, sounding so congested Buck swears he can feel it in his own sinuses. “Let me just finish my coffee, and then I-” another sneeze. “Have so much to do today.” he finishes, but at least this time he reaches for the tissues, looking anywhere but at Buck, cheeks red.

“Yeah, no, all you’re gonna do today is rest and take some medicine.” Buck says decisively, then takes the bag in his hand, and slowly starts walking to the kitchen. “Get comfortable, and I’ll just put this all away and be right back. I bought meds, tissues, and something to cook you some soup-” he starts listing off, getting louder the further he gets. “Oh, and stopped by the farmer’s market to get honey. Did you know that honey has antioxidant and antibacterial properties?” he asks excitedly, ready to tell Eddie every single thing he found in his quick research. Buck learned a long time ago that with Eddie he doesn’t need to hold back and can rant and ramble all he wants, and Eddie is happy to listen to him.

“Yeah?” Eddie yells back, voice hoarse and strained. Buck can hear the couch shift as Eddie gets comfortable, maybe even finally lays down. He knows Eddie won’t just give in and admit he’s sick, but this is a start. “Why don’t you tell me all about it?” he sounds genuinely interested, though also really tired.

“I will, just a sec! I’ll make you some tea with lemon and honey, how’s that sound?” he asks, and gets a grunt in response, though he’s not sure if that’s an answer, or if Eddie’s just trying to suppress a cough in an attempt to hide that he’s sick, as if Buck didn’t already know. He chuckles to himself. He really has his work cut out for him today.

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no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @gayarthur @diazass @thebravebitch @silentxxsoul @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @arthursdent @diazblunt @911onabc @eddiediaztho @housewifebuck @lover-of-mine @gayhoediaz @rogerzsteven @watchyourbuck @hoodie-buck @monsterrae1 @hippolotamus @ladydorian05 @forthewolves @honestlydarkprincess @wildlife4life @spotsandsocks @eowon @theotherbuckley @weewootruck @thewolvesof1998 @giddyupbuck @disasterbuckdiaz @hoodie-buck @spotsandsocks

#wip wednesday #sick eddie fic #eddie is so ridiculous in this lmao #this is really gonna be so silly and fluffy i can't wait haha #buddie fic #buddie wip #buddie #wikiangela writes #my writing #fic snippet #my wips #still lowkey stuck on alive shannon and coffee shop #and this one isnt going so smoothly either #but im here and trying to work on it all!#ngl i still feel so fucking bad and exhausted and awful and sad i cant even explain it #i thought itd be better and id be back to myself after my cold and my period were over but nope #thought about taking a lil break from writing but tbh idk how id cope without it so pushing myself through it lol #this got venty lmao ignore me #i think this silliness is exactly what i need rn hahaha

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wanderingcas · 2 months

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suddenly feeling so nostalgic for supernatural fandom pre-2016

#WHAT A TIME MAN. WHAT A TIME #not that post 2016 wasn't good too #just. it hit different #i joined the tumblr fandom in 2014 so i can't speak for before that but. yeah #i can't even explain it #the jokes the vibe the energy the friendships #i made some of my friends that i STILL talk to today around that time!!#and this all isn't to say the fandom today isn't fun to be in it was just different back then #in bad ways too lol #but i'm nostalgic!! just!!#I CANT EXPLAIN MYSELF #sam rambles

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nothoughtsjusthoffstrahm · 8 months

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I respect people who headcanon Peter as bisexual and like I get it! I also do get why people ship him with Lindsey tbh! But like, personally, I honestly cannot even picture him being in a relationship with any woman

Like even before I started shipping Hoffstrahm (yes, there was a time like that, can you imagine????), the first time I watched the Saw movies my first impression of Peter was like - "damnnnn that man is SOO gay 👀👀👀" and as I say I didn't even ship him with anyone at that time 😭 I cannot even explain it! Something about his vibe just screams "gay" so much to me!!!

Don't even get me started on people who think Strahm is straight like actually how can this man be straight, bisexual I can see and understand, but straight??? How???? 😳😳😳 It's genuinely so confusing to me dhdhdh

#no hate just personal thoughts!!!#peter strahm is so gay to me #gay peter strahm is so precious to me for some reason overall i can't even fully explain to you why 'cause #I myself am queer??? idk #idk this is so random lol #saw #peter strahm #like idk mark hoffman being bisexual i can see and i do think i prefer the bi mark over gay mark headcanon just a little bit more #but it's somehow different for me with peter i genuinely cannot explain this to you???

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lunapwrites · 4 months

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Nothing worse than when your partner says something really fucking funny and you go to immortalize it in no context text form and you have already forgotten the punchline.

Bean please for the love of God can I have at least one of my brain cells back. I am begging you.

#I'm not even in the sleep deprived stage yet #this is all me #as i explained to a friend #if you have ADHD and you choose to reproduce #be prepared for ADHD+#ADHD hard mode #i still can't get over needing to stop myself from pouring oat milk on my bagel okay #it's not great lol #anyway #this post is actually about an mtg card #Sphinx of the Second Sun specifically #which i pulled a foil of last night #much to my partner's dismay #bc now i can replace the non shiny one in my deck #with the shiny one #and continue making everyone at the table SUFFER #affectionately #lp plays magic #Bean posting

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barkingangelbaby · 2 months

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dude...

#if I don't stop hyperfixating on my breathing... like... idfk how much longer i can live like this...#it's been happening since last august snd I'm so tired of it.....#it's not even only when I'm high anymore it's like... all the time #i just like.. stop automatically breathing once i think about it and it takes me *so* *fucking* *long* to start again #honestly I'm just typing this post to distract myself a bit and hopefully i just start breathing normally again but I'm still manually #breathing rn. and now im wondering what the normal amount of time in between breaths is and if I'm taking too long ??#i tried to time my breaths with N's but she's asleep so i know it's gonna be different than mine #hoooo boy wish me luck falling asleep this is so annoying!!!!#is this ocd??? I've had several ppl in the past year tell me they think I have it but thinking about it makes me spiral #but it would explain A Lot of my thoughts n habits #anyway. I'm very annoyed with myself rn i just want to breathe normally and not worry myself into panic attacks anymore #actually very worried about how bad my stress in general has been bc there's no way it's been good for my body #ok. time to snuggle up n try to fall asleep!! im v cold rn so i have to warm up before i hug N bc i don't want to wake her with my ice cold #skin lmao. i can't wait for it to be warmer so i don't have to worry/feel bad about that lol #OKAY BBYYYYEEE if you read these tags I'm so very sorry.#rAMbles

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yousaytomato · 11 months

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egg-emperor · 1 year

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my video compilation of Eggman being a terrible father is a pain in the ass to make because he's just that terrible of a father and there are so many different clips to gather that it takes ages lmfao

#I'm fighting so hard to make a video that'll probably be pretty short when it's finished #but the gathering everything aghhh #I just need this shit on my channel I'd love to always link instead of explaining myself over and over #and this video can't even be everything because if I wanted to get hyper specific there'd be even more lol #dr eggman #eggman #dr robotnik #dr. eggman

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sherlock-is-ace · 1 year

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#ignore me i need to vent and be scared for a moment...#but i've been working my ass off today for a project that's paying me cents #and i've been debating the whole day how to explain to this client that moving forward i will have to charge more money for similar project #and i'm so so scared that it will mean losing this client cause i don't really have many regular clients and regular work #so it's scary to sound greedy (even tho i know it's not greedy) and i've been trying to convince myself it's the right thing to do #i've talked to my mom and she agrees which is huge cause she's always saying i need to be thankful for having work even if it's a lil cheap #but like now she even agrees that over 12hs work days including weekends are NOT being paid with my prices #so i'm so anxious about that and then i go on twitter and i see one movie poster and one chocolate bar wrapper made with ai #and i'm SO SCARED of the future #i went and chose the one career most easily replaced by ai #and i'm so anxious about what my future holds #but also my very near future when i have to tell this people that i can't work for nothing anymore #i hate money and i hate what it does to my head #money not only reaches the mind of those who have lots of it #it also reaches the mind of those who don't have it ://#i fucking hate this and i hate being an adult with a job #specially a freelance job where i am my own fucking boss and i set my own prices #cause i'm so fucking dumb and so easily taken advantage of #i shouldn't be saying this online lol but like i said... i'm dumb #angel talks #personal

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sidhedust · 9 months

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OKAY, this blog is a little TOO informal so I MAY make a sideblog that's more...........PR??? I guess like. "Professional" for the VNs. It all depends though...I was just thinking that no one wants to follow a creator's blog when it's all unrelated to the main work.

I mean, like I said weeks back, Tumblr is BUILT for blogging/multimedia posting and being silly-if anything, if you aren't silly and don't draw often enough, you get LESS engagement, but I guess it's like...imagine playing a game, digging it, you go to the creator's blog, and nothing about the game can be found on the blog except the dev logs.

This is probably my cue to start Toverablogging more often instead of making a sideblog and roleplaying being professional, since that can be intimidating-so the problem is that on this blod, people can't send asks about/talk to me about/comment about a work they don't know/see enough of (as there are very few posts to even do this on to begin with), and a pro-sounding blog doesn't lend itself to fun asks and interaction (though I have seen blogs dedicated to a product get funky asks too).

Of course, part of the lack of blogging and meming about the work and world is because it's a project, and I'm focusing all of my energy into sprites and backgrounds instead of posting often...but I think I could maybe do more like...ask games? Doodle requests? Doodles for answering asks? More bait. To get the blog on topic, more fun to watch/follow and more interactable.

IDK! I'm just thinking out loud. I admit I struggle with this because to be honest, I struggle with being an active consumer-I talk mostly in tags since I hate clogging up posts (though I HIGHLY enourage you all do this to mine, I love reading the additions to mine) and for the most part I tend to look at things, make a bookmark in my mind or in my browser, and be interested without showing interest with comments, asks, all that. So when coming up with ways to present my work, I'm at a loss because I'm quieter than most people might think :[ I don't know where to even begin Toveraposting and introducing the world to my followers outside of completing the VN and getting interaction from people interested enough to start it on their end, because as of now, I can only sit here and stare at everyone autism creature style ☠️☠️☠️

#sidhedust rambles #PLEASE don't get me wrong this blog is soooo fun even as is #and I enjoy what I do get! BUT I'm just debating how to make it more...about what I'm making outside of dev logs!#WITHOUT making sideblogs. since they're kinda unwieldy?#Tumblr makes them hard to manage-you can't reply to replies as them. only your main #and that's lame. I don't have infinite email addresses to make another main blog #I GUESS I'll do ask games and doodle replies when I can or something LOL idk! <3 #but yeah. this is just me going like...I want to cement my identity because right now I don't think I've made my project clear #it WAS a webcomic but now that it's a VN I have to get creative on how I share it with y'all and I'm sitting here like. well #best idea I have is to finish this game and hopefully that replaces the need to explain myself LOL

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