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batbabydamian · 4 months

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Hey, I started reading Robin son of Batman because of your recommendation (I literally have a print of your post on my phone to not forget lol). Honestly? One of the best things I ever read!!!

Thank you for opening my eyes! Damian has been one of my favorite characters for over a year, but I didn't read/watch much of him because of school, life (and probably an executive dysfunction in the mix).

Maya is incredible. I loved her.

I haven't finished all the issues yet, but do you have any other recommendations?

WAH this makes me so happy, i'm glad you still gave it a shot even with how busy life is!! ;v;

i’d love to give reccs, and i’ll try to go a beginner friendly route! tbh you can pick up whatever here, but since you've read R:SOB i’d immediately follow up with Batman and Robin (2011) #1-8! this first arc is what’s referred to in Maya’s introduction, and it's just. so good.

Main Books

Batman and Robin (2009)

Dick as Batman with Damian as his Robin!

#20-22 Tree of Blood: Dark Knight vs White Knight arc is done by Tomasi and Gleason, the team for the next Batman and Robin series

*Batman and Robin (2011)

Bruce and Damian figuring out their relationship as both Batman & Robin and father & son

imo you can enjoy the ride and read straight through this but i’ll add context to avoid as much confusion as possible since there’s the occasional tie-in or offscreen events, like Damian’s death nbd

Batman Incorporated (2012) #1-10

events leading to Damian's death - affects Batman and Robin (2011) from issue #18

kind of a tough read especially with how Talia's written, but a lot of iconic bits like Batcow, Damian's vegetarian declaration, Alfred the cat, "We Were the Best, Richard."

Robin (2021)

another self-discovery adventure, particularly after Alfred’s death and a fallout with Bruce (and questionable writing choices from his last Teen Titans run)

Batman and Robin (2023)

currently ongoing! after a number of events, Bruce and Damian are back as a duo

Damian Dynamics!

Batman: Streets of Gotham (2009) #7, 10-12

arc where Damian meets one of his first Gotham friends, Colin Wilkes

Batgirl (2009) #5-7, #17

Steph and Damian dynamic! "the bad cop, worse cop" dysfunctional duo

Red Robin (2009) #13-14

early Tim and Damian dynamic that of course includes fighting haha. funny enough, accidentally my first intro to Damian LOL

Teen Titans (2003) #89-92

Dick!Batman has Damian join the Teen Titans. Start of Damian and Rose Wilson dynamic that’s extended in Robin (2021)

Batman: Gates of Gotham (2011)

Damian meets Cass and has a brief team up

Gotham Academy (2015) #7

Damian meets Maps Mizoguchi! they have a few other meetings, but outside of that the series itself is a great read!

Robin War Event (2015)

Robin War (2015) #1, Grayson (2014) #15, Detective Comics (2011) #47, We Are Robin (2015) #7, Robin: Son of Batman (2015) #7, Robin War (2015) #2

Duke and Damian dynamic! not exactly beginner friendly but these are the main issues in order for the event! you can also read the TPB version for everything including Tie-Ins

Nightwing (2016) #16-20, #42, #43

#16-20 Nightwing and Robin arc!

#42 Dick on a mission to save Damian! the one appearance of "Wiggles" the dragon

#43 Dick, Roy, and Damian team-up

New Talent Showcase 2018 "Catwoman: Pedigree"

Selina, Damian, and Alfred the cat

Batman: Prelude to the Wedding - Robin vs. Ra's Al Ghul (2018)

Selina, Damian, and Cheese Viking - Damian's fav game shown in Nightwing: Rebirth (2016)

Monkey Prince (2022) #1-4

Marcus Sun Shugel-Shen's main comic, but Damian features as a fun dynamic here before they're in more serious circumstances in Batman VS Robin (2022)/Lazarus Planet event

Superman (2016) #10 - 11

the beginning of the Super Sons! featuring Maya!

Super Sons (2017)

solitary arcs but there’s a few event tie-in issues later

Adventures of the Super Sons (2018)

literally more Super Sons adventures lol galactic shenanigans yeehaw

Challenge of the Super Sons (2020)

Super Sons time shenanigans feat. the Justice League

Robin 80th Anniversary (2020)

"Boy Wonders" - brief Damian feature as Tim considers his next step in life

"My Best Friend" - Jon's thoughts on Damian and their dynamic

"Bat and Mouse" - refers to Damian's unfortunate Teen Titans (2016) run at the time of release which follows up with Teen Titans Annual #2 where Damian briefly gives up Robin

Extra Comics!

Superman/Batman (2003) #77

Kara and Damian in a Halloween team-up! also the appearance of "Li'l Matches" lol

DCU Halloween Special '09 "Cavity Search"

Damian out on a solo mission for Halloween night. Immediately after is Tim's Red Robin story "Then and Now: Our Father's Sins" which is more somber in contrast but also a good read!

DCU Halloween Special 2010 "Robin the Vampire Slayer"

a Dick!Batman and Robin story featuring the vampire Andrew Bennett

Cursed Comics Cavalcade (2018) "The Devil You Know"

Halloween themed comic with a sweet short story of Damian alongside Solomon Grundy

DC's Terrors Through Time (2022)

"Trick or Treat" a Super Sons Halloween story

"The Haunting of Wayne Manor" Damian and Deadman story - in the end, Boston kinda refers to Nezha's possession of Damian in Batman VS Robin (2022) which was happening at the time of this release

Batman: Li'l Gotham (2013)

lighthearted series that instantly makes me smile with the silliness and Dustin Nguyen’s art i love this dearly

Secret Origins (2014) #4 "A Boy's Life"

a retelling of Damian's origin story

Detective Comics (2016) #1001-1005

Batman and Robin vs the Arkham Knight (unrelated to the game)

Truth & Justice (2021) #6/#16 - 18 Digital First version

cute story of Damian’s birthday! Juni Ba’s art is so fun!!

DC Festival of Heroes: The Asian Superhero Celebration (2021) “Special Delivery”

short story about Damian! and poisoned pizzas. completely forgot the artist Sami Basri drew Rebirth Damian here before catboy Damian lol Cass’s story “Sounds” is also cute! Marcus makes his first appearance in "The Monkey Prince Hates Superheroes"

DC VS Vampires (2021)

Damian makes appearances throughout this elseworlds book, but the one-shot DC VS Vampires: Hunters (2022) is vampire Damian-centric!

Batman: Black and White (2021) #5

“Father & Son Outing” short story written and drawn by Jorge Jimenez!

Batman: Urban Legends (2021) #20-23

#20 “My Son” Talia and Bruce focus

#20 - 23 “The Murder Club” 4 Parts

Tiny Titans (2008) #33, #39, #45, #47

a few appearances but SO CUTE, LOOK AT HIM

*Batman and Robin (2011) reading guide

i'm mostly trying to avoid the "what did i just walk in on?" kinda feeling when i first started reading comics LOL i'll list the comics where events take place, but you don't necessarily have to read them to go through this book since things are usually explained as quickly as possible in the first page or so

#0 Someday Never Comes

Talia and baby Damian before he grows up to meet Bruce

#1-8 Born to Kill

just an incredibly solid arc for Bruce and Damian!

#9 Court of Owls Tie-In Issue

Damian VS a Court of Owls Talon. While Bruce is occupied with a home invasion of Talons, Alfred makes a call for allies to protect targeted Gotham public figures from Talons. During Batman (2011) #1-11

#10-12 Terminus

Damian challenges the previous Robins sans Steph

Batman Incorporated (2012) is occurring at this time where Talia has placed a bounty on Damian and there's small mentions of that

#13-14 Eclipsed/Devoured

mostly solitary arc! end of it leads into the Death of the Family event

#15-16 Death of the Family Tie-In Issues

Damian and Joker face-off... Alfred's been kidnapped by the Joker, and Damian goes looking for him. During Batman (2011) #13-17

#17 Life is but a Dream - Death of the Family Epilogue

a sort of subconscious check-in through the dreams of Damian, Alfred, and Bruce. Nightwing (2011) #17 features Damian encouraging Dick after Death of the Family events

#18 Undone "Requiem"

Bruce dealing with Damian's death from Batman Incorporated #8

other reactions to Damian's death: Dick in Nightwing (2011) #18, Tim in Teen Titans (2011) #18

#19-23 Denial, Rage, The Bargain, Despair, Acceptance

Bruce through the stages of grief with some batfam appearances in each. also introduces Carrie Kelley into continuity as Damian's acting tutor.

Batman (2011) #19-20 also addresses Bruce's loss

#23.1-23.4

these could be skipped - villain stories, also related to Forever Evil event.

#24-28 The Big Burn

optional Batman and Two-Face/Harvey Dent arc, #23.1 is part of this story!

Damian's resurrection and return

#29-32 The Hunt for Robin

Ras took Talia and Damian's bodies from their graves, and Bruce goes after him.

-> Robin Rises: Omega

continues events from #32. if you don't want to jump to this, basically, Glorious Godfrey and a bunch of parademons from Apokolips are here for a chaos shard which Ra's put in Damian's sarcophagus. at some point, Bruce gets a hold of the shard where he sees a vision that leads him to believe Damian can be resurrected. Godfrey ends up taking the shard, along with Damian's body since it was emitting the same energy.

#33-37 Robin Rises

Bruce hellbent on retrieving Damian from Apokolips and reviving him

-> Robin Rises: Alpha

necessary to read and continues events from #37! Damian's back with a bang lol

#38-40 Superpower

Damian adjusting to having superpowers and being alive again

Annual #1 2013 Batman Impossible

sweet (and funny) one-shot of Damian sending Bruce on a meaningful scavenger hunt around the world while Damian gets to be the cutest Batman for a bit

Annual #2 2014 Batman and Robin: Week One

one-shot takes place during Damian's absence. after Bruce and Alfred find a mystery gift left for Dick, Dick recounts a story he had told Damian from his Robin days.

Annual #3 2015 Moonshot

one-shot Batman and Robin adventure on the moon!

...and of course after Batman and Robin (2011), Damian's story continues in his first solo Robin: Son of Batman (2015)!

#damian wayne #ask #sorry for R:SOB promo again but i need this title attached to Damian's name as much as B&R 2009/2011😭#thank you for the ask anon!! really am so happy you were able to find the time to read RSOB and enjoy it!! i genuinely cheered 😭#i hope some of these comics give you many emotions and/or a smile!! <3 #if anyone would like to correct something or include some Damian comics please feel free to comment or add to the post!!#sorry if the reading guide is an intimidating wall of text hhh after i finished it i was like...this does not look beginner friendly LOL 😭#Damian's Teen Titans run is beginner friendly but it's so frustrating to read his character being regressed especially after RSOB #ig i would only recc the first 5 issues just for Mara asdsfg #super/bat 77 comic rlly made me wonder how Williamson could've made Damian sound so stiff now compared to his first time writing him?? rip.#also i love how there's so many Halloween stories here lol #maybe?? i'll do a guide for Damian's intro since those were the most confusing for me when i really got into his comics #i think his most recent appearances are a bit easier to figure out on your own but i don't mind doing a guide for that too if needed!#OOF tags got long lol i may be a bit nervous posting this bc i'd like ppl to read more Damian but worried i may have goofed somewhere #but hopefully this is helpful to anyone curious about peeking at his comics!!

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topaziraphale · 7 months

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"Stop saying Crowley won't help Aziraphale in S3 he'd go back to him in a HEARTBEAT and nothing would stop him" I get it no one likes the idea of Crowley being bitter after what happened for a long period of time but like can we at least acknowledge that he's currently going through probably the most emotional pain in his life since falling? Can we agree that he's opened his heart entirely - something you couldn't pay him to do unless the world is literally ending and he's desperate - to Aziraphale, and got shot down? Can we understand that he did it AGAIN only to lose Aziraphale again? Not that what Aziraphale did isn't without Crowley's own shortcomings (hiding the truth of Heaven's cruelty from him) but like,,,,

The appeal here isn't Scorned Crowley Doesn't Love Aziraphale Anymore, or Never Wants To Help Him Again, the appeal here is Crowley learning enough self respect to not just walk back right to Aziraphale like nothing happened after Aziraphale has had a pattern of consistently refusing him. Going years ping-ponging between "We're not friends I don't even know him" to "That's what friends are for right?" and "We're friends, why would you even say anything?" and "Friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon!"

Like I get it, Crowley is a heartbreakingly forgiving person. Of course he's gonna forgive Aziraphale, I'll be surprised if he didn't forgive him by the time he walked out the bookshop door, but gdi he could at least grant himself the luxury of being at least a little irritated for longer than however long it takes to make a globe and some books float and angrily cry out to God in his flat. But due to the change of pace and dynamic that is establishing part of the conflict for Season 3, I just really like the idea of him for ONCE prioritizing himself and being like "Okay, fine. We'll get back at it when you're ready, then," instead of just taking Aziraphale back like his words and actions meant nothing to him, when clearly they have an effect on him.

What is Aziraphale going to learn if Crowley just accepts what he did so quickly, like he always has the entire time they've been friends? Idk maybe I'm just projecting too much darkness on their dynamic but I mean, if the pattern of Aziraphale pushing Crowley away/disrespecting him one day and then being fine with his friendship the next + Crowley never stopping to be like "Hey, that's not cool, at least give me a little credit" or smth was fine all along and will continue to be fine in the future, then why, after 6,000 years of being friends and loving this demon, can Aziraphale still not accept that Crowley is just fine the way he is, and instead got excited to promote him to an angel in a heartbeat once the opportunity presented itself? You can't blame all of it on Heaven when Aziraphale has demonstrated his free will/defiance to Heaven so many times. Or, I don't know, I guess maybe we can? Maybe I'm just craving too much angst to the point where I'm letting it cloud my analysis of canon. Idk.

#derpy speaks #good omens #good omens 2 #no i dont think crowley is gonna ever hate aziraphale for what happened but he's allowed to be angry #he's allowed to be done with it all. he's allowed to be exhausted. just look at his face when he drives away.#meh. idk. but i dont know how i'll feel if crowley just INSTANTLY accepts aziraphale back in a situation involving #idk - ''hey help me stop the new apocalypse''#at least. without like. SOME pushback? it can even be something small like ''are you SURE you want ME to help you? do you really need me?''#doesnt have to be a straight refusal but i'd like SOME kind of action to show that crowley is putting his foot down for once #he deserves that self respect #do NOT reply saying that im insinuating that aziraphale is actively malicious or doing it on purpose.#everything he has done up until now is his own complicated response to all the trauma and guilt he's been through #but despite that crowley is STILL allowed to be upset... it's messy. i can write a whole paper about how this whole thing #is just unfortunate on both ends. again. we didnt get queerbaited we got communication baited 😭#but help me out here. am i just too fandom-brained to have these expectations from the story?#is there something obvious im missing that is making me sound like a complete asshole here? do i need to get my head out of the gutter?#someone please explain it to me if so because whatever it is‚ i can't find it #not queued

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lilfriezatyrant · 24 days

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More than anything,

more than anything,

I need to save my people more than anything.

#So I have listened to all songs of Hazbin Hotel again and especially this song made me cry so bad 😭😭😭#I have watched it now in German and English and both is so good ;w;#I am now crying and soft and omg the FEELS #Hazbin Hotel #screenhots #Hazbin hotel songs #god I love this entire family so much #Sir Pentious I feel you I was exact the same #AL'S SMILE IS SO FUCKIN SOFT I CAN'T #Charlie has such a strong voice I mean everyone has but jalkfdj 😭#she just wants to save their people she is such a good princess qwq #Husk #Angel Dust #Sir Pentious #Vaggie #Alastor #Niffty

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kentopedia · 2 months

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truthfully i want to back away from jjk but i don’t know how

#bc i still love nanami & want to write about him but #i don’t feel like i’m a part of the fandom anymore #& im okay w it i just want to have my own space on here #it’s just all i see allll the time and i’m kind of tired of it :( bc i don’t care anymore #i don’t get excited about it like i do bsd either :(#i also don’t just want to be known as a jjk blog which i feel like … i kind of am now maybe :/#but like it’s ALLL people post about & i have a lot of jjk moots which i love so i’m not going to block anyone 😭😭 but i also wish i could #just like …. distance myself easier lol #it’s mostly the fandom too like idk i don’t like it #anyway sorry for the rant but if you’re wondering why i’m posting all abt bsd again all of the sudden this is why #i just realized it makes me a lot happier !! :3 to be more a part of that side of tumblr

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hyunpic · 10 months

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translation credit

#😔😔😔😭😭😭😭😭😭😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩#i will personally become his tear duct so he doesn’t have to shed a tear in his life again #bc i am holding them in his eyes. i will also become his brainreseptor so i can pump #up dopamine and love hormones to his brain so he always feels sosososo loved and cared for #hyunjin #video

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skitskatdacat63 · 3 months

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Hello guys!!!!! Aforementioned project is finally finished 🫠 It was meant to be just a simple weekend project, and ended up being 30+ hours over the period of like four days. I don't think I'm an actual normal human anymore. This is the project that caused everyone in my life to question my mental and physical wellbeing and health. But I'm super excited to share this all of you!!!! Please enjoy!!!! Even if you don't like vettonso, I hope this is still interesting????

If you make any, please reblog this or tag me in it! I'm excited to see what other people, other than just me suffering alone in my bedroom, make out of this!!! <3

#jesus christ i cant believe i actually made this 😭😭#originally earlier last week i was like ahhh i wanna draw more of them in different eras(like the timeswap au)#and then randomly wanted to draw every single racesuit(nightmare)#and then im like WAIT I CAN MAKE A PICREW OUT OF THIS #no joke when i say i dont think i was a human this weekend #it was truly: eat. sleep. draw. eat. draw. sleep. draw. eat. draw. draw. sleep.#the screentime count on my ipad is soooooo fucking bad im ashamed dhfjfkkg #i dont think picrews are meant to be made in the span of a weekend #*weakly* i did it~#again as i said in the description. please request if you want anything added!!!#i dont know if ill get to it immediately bcs i just spent 30+ hours psychologically torturing myself #i actually feel so ill JSJFKGLGLG but im happy w it and i wouldnt have gone back and changed any of the process #tho the evolution of 'im having so much fun' to groaning every time i opened up my ipad again was so funny #thank you so much to suzuki i could have never have done this without your support and encouragement 🥹🥹#hoping this picrew works as a blood sacrifice to the good health and wellbeing of the amr24. the car that is launching today!#also istg i am going to dm shill and self reblog this with no shame. it is my magnum opus(as of now)#now i am going to sleep and not touch my ipad for a while djfkkglg #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #catie.art.#vettonso #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion

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chrxnicdaydream · 12 days

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this brand of skk >>>

source

#no you don’t understand. i’m actually crying #they’re so beautiful. they’re together. they’re everything #Dazai having more light in his eyes & looking so content to have Chuuya at his side again #Chuuya looking tired & unbothered & so done. and like it’s so natural having Dazai by his side #just like in the recent chapters there’s a peace to them #‘friends you don’t need a social battery for’ vibes #they’re best friends your honor #i just have this feeling lately that we’re gonna be seeing more of them together. and i am SO READY 😭#ALSO. strawberry-blond Chuuya with grey eyes. so true harukawa sensei #bsd #bungou stray dogs #skk #soukoku #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #dazai osamu #nakahara chuuya #bsd official art #sango harukawa

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twinkalicious · 6 months

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no cause the fact that richter thought alucard was a myth is absolutely killing me. he grew up hearing stories of his ancestors' heroism, but for some reason a central figure of those stories was merely a legend to him, an immortal fantasy creature who he never got to meet. honestly i'm willing to bet his own mother and grandfather and any other belmonts before them didn't either. they only told the stories of defeating dracula as their parents did before them, thinking them dramatized and never literal. it became a game of telephone, with each person doubting the existence of a friendly dhampir ally more and more because alucard wasn't there to corroborate it. alucard separated himself from the belmonts at some point. he wasn't there to see trevor and sypha's lineage despite the fact that they merged their houses and literally founded a city together. speculating the when and why is going to drive me absolutely insane, you don't understand.

#i like to think he got sick of watching them all grow old and die #like maybe after he watches trevor and sypha's babies and grandbabies die he says ok i cant keep doing this #dozens and dozens of mortals who all have trevors humor and syphas whit and their eyes and their hair and their faces all bleeding together #alucard probably left after the first few generations because he knew he couldnt keep doing it over and over again #he couldnt lose them time and time again #the fact that richter has trevor's face and sypha's eyes is going to be a problem i think #trephacard #i am feeling angst in this chillis tonight they had BETTER EXPLAIN when and why alucard broke away from the belmont/belnades line #castlevania nocturne #AND ANOTHER THING #wonder if alucard will feel any misplaced guilt about not being there to protect the belmont descendants and their loved ones #god i hope im wrong and richter was just the outlier in not meeting the immortal family friend #also known as the belmonts' living family heirloom that i lowkey headcanon him as 😭

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heybaetae · 22 days

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#hi #i am just popping on here for a second bc i’m not in the mood to be back yet but my queue is getting quite full #so i think i might have to unpause it soon #maybe tomorrow idk yet #just a heads up in case i seem active again i’m not really i just had a lot of stuff piling up 😭#it will be a Huge shuffled mess so patience is appreciated!!#i apologize if you’re waiting on me but thank you for waiting regardless #please keep using my tracked tag for your creations #i will be back for real eventually #my mental health is quite terrible lately i still need time #it’s about to be a year since the last time i saw my sister before she passed so like. my grief is going through a crazy stage #i’m still not getting a ton of sleep #my brain is just Bad things all day #it’s all just really sucky but i’m trying to do my best 🙃#i hope you are all well i miss you #i will respond to messages at some point too #there are very few which..well it puts things into perspective and validates certain feelings ig lol #it’s all good that’s something i’m working on internally #hopefully i get there #bye again for now 💕

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avirael · 2 months

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✨Just a Dream✨

These screenshots were made by my incredibly talented and kind friend Khian. Please check out her other stuff too!

#ffxiv #ff14 #final fantasy xiv #final fantasy 14 #ff14 screenshots #ffxiv screenshots #ffxiv gpose #gpose #a'viloh tia #U’laqa Tia #not my own screenshots!#I had to suffer from all the feelings when Khian send me this…#so now you have to look at this wonderful emotional sad set of pictures as well and suffer with me!#please check out the twitter profile of the person who took the screenshots! she’s amazing! ❤️#I love how she managed to deliver all the feelings!#and how she turned something that could easily have been a nightmare on a bad day into something hopeful!#like this is at some point we’re A‘vi recovered enough to remember moments like this without the feeling of crushing guilt!#and that little smile at the end shows how his memories of Laqa can give him hope and strength to carry on 🥹#I am not crying again I swear… 😭

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8rujaa · 8 days

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lesbians dont marry or fuck men thats like the whole point of lesbianism lmao

yes yes i agree i don’t think i said otherwise

#i was just thinking like i’m general if i spent the rest of my life with a man i’d feel unfulfilled whereas if i ended up marrying a woman #i don’t think i’d have that feeling of ‘something’s missing’#i was wondering if other bisexual ppl felt that way and wanted to know how lesbians came to the conclusion of being a lesbian #the asks i’ve been getting kinda make it seem like if you’re not a gold star lesbian then you’re not a Real Lesbian #which like i understand if someone’s dating men and women like you’re obviously not a lesbian #but for me i still call myself bi i was just wondering if i don’t want to be with men or date men and im sure i only want to be with women #and ever since i realized that I haven’t been with men… and don’t want to be ever again…#like would that still make me bi?#idk i feel like y’all are gonna cancel me for questioning my sexuality 😭 i’m not saying i’m lesbian but like where Am I in the spectrum ???#i’m just trying to figure out if my ‘attraction’ to men is genuine attraction or just like… societal pressure to be with a man #or daddy issues cuz all the men i’ve been with are always like older my last boyfriend was 10 years older than me and Idk #or if my repulsion is actually repulsion bc i don’t Like them or trauma??#im sorry if i offended anyone i’m not trying to invalidate anyone’s sexuality just trying to figure mine out 🥲#inbox

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the-acid-pear-art · 1 year

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Save a cowboy, ride a huge fucking sausage today 🏜️

(i will hopefully get around to making more Peppi pin ups in the future-)

#my art #artists on tumblr #pizza tower #pizza tower peppino #peppino spaghetti #TUMBLR PLEEEASE PUT THIS ON THE MAIN TAG OR I'LL CRY AND THROW UP #had to post this twice but anyway uhhh horniness encouraged etc etc #OKAY ITS ON THE GODDAMN TAG i feel normal again anyway allow me to ramble about this 🥰#it took me way to long to get to this and honestly this might be hands down the most complex background I've ever done #and pretty one for that matter #might implement that in more future stuff #i honestly hope the lust within me when i made this can translate well to the viewer MSGSKSHDKDHD 😭😭#i honestly get so stressed by art i lose that feeling #btw the original sketch did NOT have the best and i had given pep nipple piercings... what could've been 😢#next one i make will be a pin up of the rocket because of course it will be #dont hold your breath tho #also yeah i got a bit silly w this LineArt i love experimenting w that shit lmao #BIG FAN OF IT TOO GOTTA SAY #anyway i am pleased w this and i hope yall are too etc etc

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dazais-guardian-angel · 21 days

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I'm finding it difficult to reconcile the fact that what I've always wanted and envisioned for Nikolai and his relationship with Fyodor based on fanworks and the very very little canon information we've had to go off of so far, will very likely be very different from what we actually get.

While I understand the appeal of Fyodor taking over Nikolai's body via his blood ability, and the inherent, romantic, ironic tragedy of that — for Nikolai, the person who yearned for freedom, to meet an end by having his soul eternally trapped in the body of the person he loved the most, while Fyodor lives on in his body, never truly knowing how much he was adored by him — I would just hate the idea of that happening now? It just feels far, far too soon for Nikolai to be dead, for his character to no longer have a role or a purpose; his mind and behavior is so utterly fascinating in all its bizarre contradictions, there's so much more to explore and discover with him, he's one of BSD's most complex characters, or at least he's set up to be, and I really hope Asagiri wouldn't throw him away this soon without doing anything more with him.

I never really thought that Nikolai would be the one to end Fyodor for good, way down the line (that can only ever be Dazai's job, to me, since he's his foil), but I always imagined he'd at least have some kind of role in attempting to kill him, since that's his ultimate wish. I imagined that it would be ugly, frenzied, unhinged, desperate, Nikolai finally being forced to acknowledge the horrible truth that's always been buried within his subconscious but he's never wanted to accept: that going against all human reason and killing someone he cares so deeply for will not, in fact, simply make those feelings go away, and will instead make them unable to ignore in his despair. The realization that he'll always be chained to human emotions, to love, no matter how much he thinks he can be free of them. And then, the ensuing breakdown from that. Yes, it's extremely fanficky lmao, but that kind of drama makes sense to me for him and them. It's interesting.

There was also the angst angle of Fyodor being immortal, and Nikolai's agenda perhaps stemming from wanting to save him from that, and being able to finally free him from it in the same way he himself wants to be freed. Killing being the ultimate expression of love, not too dissimilar to Mushitarou killing Yokomizo, both putting on an act of being hateful/vengeful/hostile towards the other in order to cope with the fact that deep down they can't bear the thought of them being gone.

But then we got Fyodor's "death" here, and Nikolai's reaction to it was so unbelievably underwhelming and calm that it made me question everything I thought I knew about Asagiri's writing skills him, and what the story is going for with him. And combined with this revelation now that Fyodor is (unsurprisingly!) immortal, but specifically in the way that he can be killed but supposedly resurrects endlessly (which I really like in of itself, don't get me wrong)... it makes me question what exactly Nikolai knows, or will know, and it somewhat destroys the potential angst we could get with them in the end, or at least drastically changes it.

If Nikolai already knows Fyodor can't be killed, that means we'll never get a moment where he tries to kill him and then has to face the fact that he did the deed and it didn't make him feel freed, and he instantly regrets it. It also means we'd never get a moment where he tries to kill him and then discovers he can't truly die, and the ensuing insanity that would occur from that. It also makes me even question the legitimacy of his reaction to Fyodor's "death" here... was it so damn apathetic and lukewarm because he already knows it wasn't permanent? I mean, I'd like an explanation for it feeling so ooc, it would make me feel better about that, but I can't deny that it would be disappointing to have yet another part of this arc that was just an act and not genuine feelings....

Now, that isn't to say that it's impossible to do anything interesting with Nikolai already knowing the truth. He could be wishing to try to attain free will through the illogical pursuit of an impossible task: in this case, killing Fyodor. There's a beautiful, tragic paradox in him wishing to attempt something to gain his freedom that he and we know is impossible, especially if subconsciously he takes solace in the fact that he'd be able to kill Fyodor without actually losing him for good. If Nikolai doesn't already know, assuming he's not dead he's likely going to find out the truth soon when he next sees Fyodor alive and kicking — I can't imagine a way he wouldn't find out. In that case, we wouldn't get the aforementioned scenario where he tries to kill him and discovers it's futile, which is the most juicy to me I won't lie, but I am still fascinated by the idea of how Nikolai will respond just seeing him suddenly alive again and having to process this after having just mourned him. It's interesting to imagine how he might respond to and treat Fyodor after at last knowing how it truly felt to lose him, and realizing how much he didn't want that, and then suddenly having him back. It might cause him to finally understand that his desire for freedom is unobtainable, and cause him to spiral, and fundamentally change their relationship going forward. An eventual tragic end for him such as Fyodor taking over his body would not feel out of place to me in that case, perhaps, but still not until we've had more time to see Nikolai reflect and see his possible change in perspectives.

I don't know, I'm just rambling at this point lmao. I know very well that so much of my expectations and desires for Nikolai and Fyolai are built up from fan content over the years just because there's been nothing else to work with, and that it's unfair to judge what Asagiri decides to do with him/them based on preconceived notions. Whatever he does could still be interesting in the end, even if it's not what I initially wanted or expected, and being open to being surprised is always a good thing. At the end of the day we still know barely anything about Nikolai, so it's not completely fair for me to judge something as ooc for a character we still know so little about.

But... it's because we know so little about him and have gotten so little of him, that at the very least, I'm gonna be really upset if he does die here from being possessed by Fyodor like people are worrying about. I really don't think he will, because I'm pretty confident the helicopter pilot is the one Fyodor swapped with/resurrected in the body of as per soup's theory, and again I'm not saying it wouldn't be fitting eventually... but I really don't want it to happen now. :/ I just think Nikolai still has so much potential as a character and so much more we need to see of him before his likely inevitable and tragic demise (however it happens), so whatever Asagiri decides to do with him I just really, really hope we don't lose him so prematurely; it would honestly be such a tremendous waste imo.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd 114 #is this meta? i don't know #more like just incoherent rambling lmao #i just don't want Nikolai to die man....... I really don't #i get that people are hyped up on the juicy tragedy of it all but plssssssss it's too soon for him to go #we need so much more of the enigmatic clown...... he's too interesting to lose just yet!!!#i'm sad at probably losing the outcomes i always hoped for him and fyolai but right now i just want More Of Him #he can't die so soon when he's barely even had pagetime #it COULD be fascinating to see Fyodor's reaction to taking over his body but....... i don't think he'd /have/ any right now #they need more time together before one of them dies #i always thought/hoped Fyodor would die first and Nikolai would be left alone to angst lmao but ugh........#now it's really feeling like it'll be the opposite #which again doesn't HAVE to be a bad thing depending on how Asagiri executes it........ I just think this is way too soon for it to happen #i'm gonna be so mad if Nikolai just dies offscreen without us ever hearing from him again because Fyodor possessed his body #poetically cruel and tragic? yes. but also so anticlimactic at this moment in time #never getting to hear from him again.........#ugh i blame all the Fyolai fan creators; they've raised the bar too high 😭😭😭#idk maybe i'm just talking out of my ass though. i probably am. i just feel conflicted about all this and need to see where it goes

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