#honestly the highlight of my last London trip
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I just watched Manhunter – the 1986 Michael Mann adaptation of Thomas Harris’ infamous novel Red Dragon – and I have some THOUGHTS that I cooked up in the shower because this could not be more different from Bryan Fuller’s Hannibal, and that’s not a bad thing at all!
A little bit of context so I can explain where I’m coming from: back in late 2019 I was studying abroad in the UK and our professors took us to a Blake exhibition in London. As a writer, socialist, and avid horror fan, I was floored. I got really overwhelmed in there and spent the next couple days decompressing before I started digging into his work in earnest, as well as works revolving around his art. I bought a copy of Red Dragon not long after that trip and worked my way through it when I had free time. I also started working on a paper for class about Blake’s influence in my favorite movie, Blade Runner, which meant I was deep-diving into noir as well as this trippy artwork – lots of anticapitalist rhetoric, lots of body horror, lots of monsters. Sooooo many monsters.
The pandemic hit, we all were sent home, and I watched a lot of crime shows – Twin Peaks, Mindhunter, and Hannibal were the main ones. I was really excited to get to the Red Dragon storyline in Season Three and I was not disappointed. By that point in the show, Hannibal had turned from a police procedural with supernatural undertones to a full blown queer Gothic romance. That also includes the Dolarhyde/Reba storyline, even if it didn’t last.
Dolarhyde got a lot of attention in the show – more than I was expecting, honestly. Richard Armitage did SUCH a wonderful job portraying that character, it’s incredibly nuanced and sympathetic. Our first moments with Dolarhyde are where he’s working out, practicing his speech, and getting his infamous back tattoo of the Dragon. There is a lot of attention paid to his body, and his discomfort in his body. I’m half-joking, but the trans vibes are strong with this one: “Becoming” might as well be referring to transitioning, albeit into a giant monster (whatever floats your boat!). As an out-and-proud director making an out-and-proud show, it makes sense that Fuller is focusing on the queer elements of the Red Dragon – the coding was always there, but now he’s really bringing it front and center via Dolarhyde’s physicality/body language.
I was kind of surprised, then, that Dolarhyde was not as prominent in Manhunter. There was hardly any discussion of the Red Dragon artwork at all, which was also surprising – is it because it was too fantastical for a director who deals with grounded, gritty crime? Compared to the NBC show, this Red Dragon was kind of one-note, which was a shame. He’s the bad guy, after all. He’s the guy Will is supposed to catch. But then I remembered: Dolarhyde is this movie’s Waingro. He’s the destabilizing element. I’m not an expert in Michael Mann, but I know he’s very into the stability of the family unit (shout out to good dad Will Graham!) and Dolarhyde specifically targets stable families – this was already in the Harris novel, he didn’t have to make that up to fit his thematic interests. Dolarhyde only matters because he serves as a threat to our hero and his values.
This version of Will Graham is surprisingly grounded, privately tortured, and full of resolve and dedication. We see that he’s got a history with Hannibal – there are definitely some queer moments here (there are a surprising number of 80s love songs in the soundtrack, hmm wonder what that’s about), and it’s a bummer we don’t get much of Cox’s Lecter because he is delightfully funny. Still, I don’t see this Will succumbing to his inner darkness anytime soon; he’s got a very good relationship with his wife and son (Vincent Hanna, take notes.) He is very much a Michael Mann Protagonist, even if he comes from another writer’s mind. In contrast, Bryan Fuller’s Will comes across as a Gothic hero(ine) in that his sensitivities are always highlighted, he looks like he needs to be taken to the seaside for his health, and he can’t seem to shake his demons (Hannibal is, after all, difficult to avoid.)
In any case, both adaptations are valid and it’s kinda comparing apples to oranges. Manhunter leans way more noir, Fuller’s Hannibal is Gothic all the way. I am definitely going to be rewatching Manhunter to pick apart some of the queer coding & subtext hehe
#rant#hannibal#bryan fuller#will graham#manhunter 1986#michael mann#the great red dragon#thomas harris
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Long time no see
Spring has finally arrived, after last weeks dump of snow temperatures are rising and I can see grass again. This must have motivated me to update my blog again after 3 months of hibernation... Though lots of updates!
Where do I start... Well, of course with the most important of all. I passed my exam! 6 months of studying lead up to me taking the written exam to jump the first hurdle in becoming a physiotherapist in Canada on March 9th. I knew ethics was a major component, but the exam still was surprisingly ''ethical''. Anyway, can't say more than that or I might go to jail (not allowed to share exam details), however, the exam has prepared me to provide physio in prison in case of such an event. I did not leave the exam with a great feeling, and it left me hanging for 2 weeks before the results came back. This was an opportunity for me to teach Naomi 2 new Dutch phrases; ''Heels over the pond'' and ''On the edge of the board''.
Passing the exam was not only a relief professionally, but also personally as we were going on holiday 4 days later. We spent 6 days in Hong Kong, visiting some of Naomi's relatives and being shown around by her parents as our local guides. For a guy coming from a town with just over 100.000 inhabitants, and the tallest building being a church reaching 109 meters, being amazing by HK architecture is an understatement. Never had I see neighborhoods consisting out of just skyscrapers. Or restaurant flats where the first 10 floors of a skyscraper are all restaurants. There is no meaning to the phrase; ''Even een terrasje pakken'' in this country. But maybe even more impressive was how clean it was. How can one of the worlds most densely populated places on earth be so clean, versus most other places I have been or lived?
But my report on this part of the trip would not be complete if I did not mention the food we ate. HK is known for its incredible gastronomy, and for the foreigners probably an interesting one as well. I tried many new flavors and dishes, and at one dinner had to particularly live up to my name as an adventurous eater. Maybe it was also because this was the first time I met some of Naomi's relatives and I knew I was being judged on what I would eat. To start off was shark fin soup, not too ''scary'' right? Then we had a roast piglet, presented as if it had been squished. Now we get to the exciting part, goose feet. And for dessert, pigeon spit pudding (edible birds nest). When you hear such ingredients you may be shocked, but in all honestly it tastes good, and I can often link such dishes to western dishes that I've had in the past. If you are interested in more details on our food from our trip (or the whole trip in general), check out Naomi's blog. As usual, she has done a way better job than me of blogging.
Other highlights of our trip in HK were a nice outdoor stair master with the cousin Isaiah, who spoke fluent Dutch self taught online; ''Faka met jouw G'' and who smoked us on this hike. The only other time I've seen Naomi that tired was during the last 10k of our Elfstedentocht. He was also so kind to let me try out the new Apple Vision Pro, currently only available in the US and wow... it blew my mind. I am fairly of of date on what tech can do these days, so such an experience was totally unexpected. We also visited 3 different graveyards and seeing the differences between Buddhis and Christian graveyards was interesting. And our trip to the gambling capital of the world, Macau. Where I visited Paris, London and Venice from the hotels in 1 day.
Next destination was 9 days of travelling around Japan, the country where you can be served by robots, but train schedules need to be manually searched in books by the desk clerks. A country that is proud of it's traditions and ways, for a foreigner sometimes confusing but beautiful. First we did 1 day in Osaka. Our hotel was right outside Osaka castle, and much to our surprise it was peak cherry blossom season! Usually it would've been earlier and we had already anticipated that we had missed it. Dinner that day was my first encounter with Wagyu, yummy!
The next day we spent travelling to Onomichi, stopping at Himeji castle which is considered to be Japans most beautiful castle. And beautiful it was indeed, but with beauty comes tourism, and with tourism comes crowdedness (pesky tourists). We were glad to have seen it, but the 1 hours line up and cattle like herding system to see inside were not worth it in my opinion.
Now comes my highlight of the trip! A 75k bike ride over 6 islands connected by massive bridges called Shimanami Kaido. Despite the small drizzle the scenery was stunning and it was a welcome change to the busy cities previously. It was enjoyable to explore the Japanese countryside and fishing villages while getting in some exercise. Naomi's managed to wobble off her bike 5,5k into the ride, which gives her a 100% succes rate of falling off bikes on excursion rides at an average distance of about 8% of the total distance.
Next up was Kyoto, a large but quieter city than what we were used to with many temples to see. We did a stepping stone river crossing which both gave us wet socks (and a good laugh), spent some time on the bank drying our socks and as always while we wait, played a game of Wingspan.
And lastly, 3 days Tokyo! After visiting the most densely populated city in the world, now it was time to visit worlds biggest city with 37 million inhabitants, including the metropolitan area. A cool variety between big modern architecture and narrow old streets filled with food joints, allowing only for seating at the bar due to how narrow they are. We were exposed to a whole new level of arcade gaming, and it reminded me of a popular saying; ''No matter how good you are, there is always an Asian better than you at it''. I've seen some impressive guitar Hero shenanigans during my high school days, but I've never seen a man in suit and tie octo-combo a Japanese KPOP song for 10 minutes straight. I used to think AFL was the peak standard of athleticism, but have my doubts now...
As an experienced Mario Carts driver I was sad to miss out on the Mario Carts driving experience through Tokyo streets due to not having an international drivers license. Unfortunately, they did not accept 7+ years of Wii MC driving experience with some top ranks in the world (but never first, remember, and Asian always beats you). I got to watch professional sumo wrestlers practice at their ''stable''. They even came out after training for some pictures which was really cool. And last but not least, what am I missing in my recap from Tokyo? Exactly, food. I had what was probably my best meal in my entire life! An amazing 13 course dinner with lots of different cuts of meat including wagyu. Who knew tongue could be so tender by the way?!
I have cut myself in the fingers by taking so long to blog. My recap of our holiday was not nearly as complete or detailed as Naomi's. If you are planning a trip to any of these places take a look at hers. She also has all the names.
That's all for now, hopefully I will have some exciting news in the next blog regarding work!
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New Friends & Day trip to Tivoli
Welcome back to my blog!
Last week was a pretty good one spent more lowkey and around the city. I used Monday to recover from the weekend and London and catch up on laundry and some school work. The next few days were mostly class and creating a nice routine for myself. I recommend making a routine similar to one you would have at school. It makes living abroad feel more familiar. It is also nice to visit places multiple times and be a regular customer. There is a gelato place down the street from my apartment and one of the men that works there recognizes us now. It is so fun because he talks to us and tells us about the happenings in Rome! An Italian friend per se.
One more highlight from my week is that in my Wednesday, four hour long painting class we started doing art ourselves. I knew we were going to be drawing but I was very nervous. We used charcoal and practiced drawing a still life that we will eventually paint. My professor likes to say, "if you can't draw you can't paint", so that was also a bit nerve-racking. However, I totally impressed myself and really performed well and on track with the rest of the class. I was really proud, and it made me extra excited for what we would create the rest of the semester.
Wednesday afternoon relates to the title of my blog about new friends. One of my missionaries at church passed my number to another Catholic girl studying abroad in Rome and she texted me and we met up! Her name is Scarlett and she is super sweet and friendly. We got coffee and then went to daily Mass together which was fun. This goes to show that there are so many opportunities to keep making friends throughout your study abroad. You can and will make more friends than just the people you meet in the first week if you put yourself out there. I was honestly really nervous to meet up with her because I knew nothing about her. It turned out so great though and we ended up meeting up again on Friday! This also taught me that there is still a support system back at USC and reaching out to people there can be really valuable.
That pretty much encapsulate the end of my week. The weekend was when the more exciting stuff happened. On Saturday my friends Allie and Mary Catherine and myself decided we wanted to take a day trip to Tivoli. It is only a 6 euro train ride round trip and only like 1.5 hours each way. It is one of my goals this semester to travel to many other countries and places, but I also want to prioritize exploring Italy. There are so many places to explore in this country that I could never leave the country once this semester and still go somewhere new every weekend. Sometimes this can be an overlooked aspect of study abroad I think, but it is so valuable to get to know and love the country you are based in!
Well now to tell you about Tivoli. We slept in a bit and then walked to the train station for our 10:30 train. We were successful taking the train until we got to our transfer and missed it. It worked out though because we got on the next one. This was my first time on a train through a scenic area and it was beautiful! Definitely one of my favorite forms of transportation.
Tivoli is a quaint town outside of Rome situated at the base of the mountains in the foothills known for its beautiful villas and scenery. I really enjoyed Tivoli because it was much quieter and less busy than Rome. That can be kind of nice every once in a while. When we arrived we were hungry so we went to this restaurant on the side of a cliff. The food was amazing and the outdoor seating was to die for. Easily my best meal since I have been abroad. (which is a common experience for visitors)
After this lunch trip we walked around the city and visited the main basilica. The outside was very simple but the inside was beautiful. It had so much to look at for a little place and would be a wonderful place to have mass. We then tried to go into the Villa d'Este, the most famous site in Tivoli, but we missed the entrance time by 15 minutes. Darn! I am really considering going back just to see them because they are beautiful and unlike anything I have seen before with fountains and art galleries. Since we missed the villas we wandered to find the castle in Tivoli. It was cool to see a castle in real life that looked just like ones from fairytales. As we walked we also ducked into little nooks and crannies around the streets so we could see the views. This town is just surrounded by the beauty of nature.
All I can say is that even the simplest weeks that seem like they will be boring because there are no big travel plans can be great! Put yourself out there and make new friends. Say yes to a day trip and get to know your host country because there is beauty all around. I hope everyone has a great week thanks for tuning in!
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"ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴛʜɪꜱ ʙᴏᴏᴋ, ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ?" - ʜ.ᴏ
Hello to you! There it is! My first Harrison request. I'm working for a one shot with him, but it takes me so long because it's a little angst. But don't worry, this one is just fluff! I hope you'll all like it! I did not have time to be reread and corrected. So be indulgent once again, English is not my native language.
Summary: harrison met you in this coffe/bookstore where you friend worked. Since that day, he tried to ask you out but nothing really worked he would like. Until that day.
Word count: 2690
Warning: some of swear, spoilers of "one day" by David Nicholls"
Pairing : harrison osterfield
Request: yes!
You walked happily into the store, heading towards the counter where your best friend was. “The cup and feather” was a second home to you. The warm atmosphere that reigned in the bookstore/cafe has always seduced you. There was a peace of mind that relaxed your muscles: the woody decor, the warm and captivating light, the mixed smell of old/new books and coffee. You were leaning on the counter where Maya was completing an order for a regular.
“Good morning Luke! Enjoy your drink!” you said with a large smile.
“Hello dear y/n! Thanks sweetie! Let me know if you want to drink something. It’s on me”
“It won’t be necessary but thank you. I appreciate!”
The customer adds a generous 10-pound bill to the tip pot with a wink at you. Maya thanked Luke and then gave you a broken look. You gave her an amused smile, shaking your head, already anticipating her next line. But nothing could dissipate your good mood, your day was good.
"It's unbelievable how my tips increase when you're here. What's your secret?"
“Hello to you too, dear best friend. I don't have a secret...but maybe, try to be...nicer to customers? Give them a smile while you're taking their order! ”
“Hello honey. I’m so thankful you’re here. It’s a boring day”
It was a pretty quiet day, there weren't a lot of customers. The rather gloomy London weather seemed to have put them off. A huge thunderous sound echoed outside and Maya jumped. You had a sympathetic and somewhat amused smile. You liked the storm. To be honest, you liked the storm when you weren't alone: feel the heavy, electric atmosphere before the refreshing rain falls. She looked out the window with annoyance.
"Jesus. It looks like it's gonna be a long day" she complained
“Don’t be so dramatic! Let me help. How can I help you?”
“There is this book cart that I have to put away and that has been lying around for an hour. But my boss would kill me if he found out that someone who actually doesn’t work here, did it for me”
Maya gave you a knowing look. It wasn't that she hated you helping her with her work, on the contrary, you were quite useful to her. But she would have preferred that you spend your free time other than helping her. You took a few books from the cart, sticking your tongue out at your best friend and rushing down the aisles of the library section. The distinct sound of a heavy downpour was heard outside and a few seconds later, the store door opened to let in two young, but also handsome, men. Maya bit her lip as one of the individuals approached the counter with a polite but warm smile. He seemed tall, with a thin but toned build, thin lips, his blue eyes pierced her from the moment his eyes met hers; a fucking model.
"Hello. Do you mind if we stay a little while the downpour subsides?" he asked.
" Hell no, of course! You can stay as long as you want as long as I can admire you… uh, shit, no, as long as you order something… did I say the other part out loud?
The second boy laughed, but nothing mocking. He was shorter than the guy across from Maya, brown hair and chocolate eyes, muscular arms but not sculpted like a bodybuilder. He seemed in good shape.
The blonde raised his eyebrows, an amused smile on his lips.
"I'm afraid so. Um ... okay. Tom?" he turned to his friend "Do you want to drink something?"
"Black tea. A single sugar and a drop of milk."
Your friend nodded meaning she heard it and then she patiently waited for the blonde to place his order.
"I'll have mint tea. Just one sugar too."
"Noted! Feel free to go grab a book once you've settled in."
The blonde smiled at Maya as he turned slightly to the tables to settle in with his friend. You were immersed in reading a synopsis when you finally returned to the counter. You looked up too late while talking to your best friend.
"Hey, Maya can I keep - ouch"
You had just hit a rather solid chest and your eyes widened in surprise. Two hands grabbed your shoulders before the fall, stabilizing you on your two good. And thank you, handsome stranger because you would have been able to let yourself fall so as not to drop the book you were holding in your hands.
"Everything's alright, love?"
"Huh Huh" You barely said, still a little surprised by the impact.
He smiled at you and finally joined Tom at a table without giving you a chance to thank him. You leaned against the counter giving your best friend an indecipherable expression.
"Who are these guys?"
"I know, right?" Maya whispered, biting her lips again.
You smiled to her. You and your best friend had the same tastes when it came to boys. So it was no wonder that they found them attractive.You quickly gave a last look on the mysterious guy before focusing on the cart again. Your logic wanted you to go back and forth rather than pushing this wheeled machine. And deep down, it was also an excuse to admire the blond boy at the table 7. When you came back from your last trip down the aisles and there were no books left on the cart. You noticed with a sad expression on your face that both boys were gone. What did you expect? A romantic scene where love story is born in the aisles of a bookstore cafe. What's the point? You might not even have been his type. Correction: You were certainly not his type. Maya came over to you, a mischievous half-smile on her face.
"If you're wondering. His name is Harrison. I heard his friend call him. And he kindly tipped you 25 pounds."
"I don't work here."
"It's just like"
"I would probably never see him again, Maya"
"Believe me, I have a feeling that you will."
☙♡❧
And she was right. The following week did not bring the handsome stranger, the following week either. You had totally, or almost, forgotten this delicious abrupt encounter. You were in the aisles of the cafe, looking for the next book you were going to devour when you were politely tapped on the shoulder, a throat clearing accompanying the gesture.
"Hm, excuse me?"
You turned around and your eyes widened a little in surprise. You did not expect, or more, to see this beautiful stranger again. He was holding a book in his hands and looked nervous. His demeanor was endearing and you couldn't help but suppress a shy smile.
"Yes?"
"I'm looking to get my mom a book. I've heard of this one but ... I wanted your advice."
You raised an amused eyebrow. He wanted to buy a book from his mom and he went to a coffee shop to ask you for advice on a book he obviously couldn't buy here. You found this sweet and awkward. You gave him a shy and mischievous smile.
“You know you're not supposed to buy the books here… just read them. »You joked
"Hmm, yeah ... but ... I wanted your opinion since ..."
"I don't work here ..."
The surprise was read in his eyes as in yours but for different reasons. Harrison felt silly for asking you when you weren't an employee. You, you were surprised by your tone, which seemed so cold when it was not your intention. You didn’t want to be rude to him. In fact, he makes you a little bit uncomfortable. You had never been so awkward with a boy but, for some reason you didn't know, his piercing blue eyes bowled you over. You couldn't deny that you were drawn to him and there was something really spellbinding about Harrison. To catch up you glanced at the book, you wrinkled his nose and you scratched your head
“I'm sorry, this is not the kind of novel I read ... But if she read Fifty-shade of Grey ... this book might please her” you told him, somewhat embarrassed.
Harrison gave you a confused look and you pointed to the cover of the book. To be fair, although he won't admit it, Harrison had grabbed the first book he saw off the storage cart and it actually turned out that it was an erotic fiction rather categorized in the young adult, a bestseller. Honestly, you didn't know where to put yourself. You watched the cheeks of the boy in front of you turn deep red.
"Okay ... Okay. I wasn't there for my mom."
"No shame ..." you tried to comfort him
"No..no i swear. It..i'm … okay ...
A boy with curly hair appeared in the aisle, calling out to the young man, breaking that awkward moment between you at the same time. Harrison's friend seemed vaguely familiar to you, as if you knew him or seemed to know him.
"Harrison, we're late. Tom's gonna kill me, mate!"
Harrison gave a sigh of relief that he seemed to have held back. He gave you a sorry smile and apologized before leaving you, putting the book down on a shelf. They headed for the exit and you stayed there, without moving, still challenged by this moment. You heard a laugh that came from the curl without actually hearing the reason.
"Did you ask her advice about 365 DNI? What kind of div are you?"
"Shut up Harry."
And Harry's laugh echoed one more time before the door closed on them. After a few seconds, you returned to the counter where your best friend was. She nodded at you, as if asking like it had happened. You have to shake your head negatively while shrugging your shoulders. It was the most bizarre interaction you have had in your life. A total failure. With that, he was sure you would never see him again.
☙♡❧
But you were wrong again. You were, again and again, at the cafe. Maya was finishing her shift and you were sitting at a table with a book in your hand. You were in your own little world when your gaze was drawn to a male hand, wearing rings highlighting the veins of that said hand, placing a cup of latte on your table.
"I didn't order any-" you said before interrupting you.
Harrison was in front of you, a shy little smile drawn across his face. You frowned, intrigued. How had he guessed your favorite drink? A simple glance over the blond's shoulder told you your answer: Maya was smiling at you, thumbs up, as a token of encouragement. You looked Harrison, pursed your lips, flattered by the gesture.
“I wanted to apologize for the other time.” Harrison finally spoke.
“It's nothing ... I..I hope your mom liked the book.” you just told him with a little smile
"I… It wasn't for her."
"Oh..for whom?" you asked intrigued.
He smirked, amused by your carelessness. Was he not obvious, however? Since the day he met you, the actor hadn't stopped thinking about you. Tom and Harry kept telling him that he was completely whipped and looked like a fool.
"For no one actually. I grabbed the first book I found."
"But why?" you seemed more confused.
"I wanted to see you. It was a pretext… I didn't know how to approach you."
Your cheeks turned as red as Harrison's the last you met him. You were flattered but at the same time surprised to know that he was interested in you. You've replaced a strand of hair behind your ear, blushing. An awkward silence has settled between you two. Neither of them really knew how to break the ice. Harrison looked up at the book you had put on the table when he arrived.
"What do you read?" he asked interested
“One day by David Nicholls. It’s the one of the most moving books I have ever read.”
And you started talking for hours about how this book moved you and how Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess' portrayal in the film adaptation blew your mind. How you went from laughter to tears to anger. How you got attached to the characters in both the book and the movie. Harrison couldn't stop you. He admired you talking with passion and found you endearing. The way you spoke with your hands or the way you frowned when some character action disturbed you. You were in your world and he wanted to enter it.
"I hope we end up like them." He said, interrupting you.
You suddenly stopped in your monologue looking at Harrison puzzled. You didn't expect this. First, because by knowing the story of this novel. You didn't want anyone to experience people's stories, no matter how beautiful it was. Second, did Harrison just say he was considering something with you?
"Like who?" you asked
"Emma and Dexter ... I hope we have such a great story."
You pursed your lips, amused. You swallowed to keep from laughing and you shook your head. You were sure he didn't read the book but you wanted to play with him a little.
"I don't hope so."
"Why? Their love story is beautiful!"
"You haven't read this book have you?"
"Of course yes!" he defended himself, uncomfortable.
In truth, he was lying. He was trying to impress you. He had simply said he wanted to live this love affair to soften you and try to approach you to ask for a date. Once again, you smiled, genuinely amused by the boy in front of you. He looked so innocent and so confident in her walk. But you knew ... You knew he hadn't read the book.
"Harrison, she dies at the end"
Harrison's cheeks have once again turn red. He played with his hands nervously, embarrassed. He was an idiot, a complete fucking div. He rubbed the back of his neck, trying to let go of all the stress he had accumulated but also to find a way to make up for it. You were blowing him outright. He thought you were so beautiful and had never been so awkward about approaching a girl. Of course, Harry had introduced him to his ex-girlfriend. But, the actor had never had a hard time flirting. He knew his strengths, he was kinda funny, can't deny he was pretty handsome, after all he was a model. He was also an actor, he could play all emotions, recite hundreds of lines of dialogue. But you looked different and he was unable to have a conversation with you without being ridiculous. You found that rather adorable.
"Okay, okay. I don't hope we end up like them."
“I hope you don't wait 20 years before asking me out?”
Harrison looked at you surprised. Did you really just reach out to her? Did he hear what you just said or did his imagination play a dirty trick on him? Her heart skipped a beat. You pursed your lips before putting on a warm but shy smile. You weren't that confident in normal times but ... but it was pushing you out of your comfort zone. You liked him, his clumsiness made you laugh and moved you a lot. You wanted to know him better. And with a simple smile, Harrison knew he had the green light.
"Would you ... have coffee with me?"
"I'm already taking one with you, idiot" you joked ...
"Yeah..hmm, okay ... um. Would you like to go on a date ... one day?"
Your smile widened. You didn't know if he had chosen his last words intentionally but you liked to think he had. And if it wasn't, that awkwardness had melted your heart. You bit your lip, a smile still on your face. Your cheeks were rosy with emotion. Eventually, you might have had your romantic story at a coffee shop / bookstore.
“Yes, Harrison. I would like to go out with you.
#harrison osterfield#harrison osterfield x reader#harrison osterfeild fluff#harrison osterfield writing#harrison osterfield x y/n#haz osterfield x reader#haz osterfield
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Not So Dangerous Liaison - Sidney Crosby - Part 1
Word Count: 3,296
POV: Starts with Reader and switchs to Crosby
Warning: Language
Notes: Ok so I’ve wanted to do a Crosby series for awhile and this idea has been stuck in my head. I’m not sure how long this series will be, kind of just seeing where it will go. Hopefully you’ll all stick around and see where this goes.
READER POV
It was September of 2015, that was the first time Sidney Crosby met the woman who would change his life; only he didn’t know that then. He first saw you at Marc-Andre’s house, when you were standing there talking to Flower’s wife, Veronique. He didn’t know that a chance encounter at the same salon had led to you and Vero becoming best friends. What he did know was that you had to be one of the most beautiful women he ever saw.
You were wearing a pair of white shorts with a navy peplum off the shoulder top. To Sidney, you looked gorgeous, cute and casual; not really trying too hard knowing you were at a party with a room of NHL players. He could already see all the young single guys on the team sniffing around you. He couldn’t really blame them, considering where his thoughts had drifted the moment, he laid eyes on you. Wanting to know more about you, he made the decision to introduce himself. “Great party Vero, thanks for having everyone here before the season gets underway.”
“Yeah sure, it really wasn’t anything. Marc-Andre and I were glad to do it.” Sid shifted his weight from one foot to the other as he waited for his friend to make an introduction to you. Veronique finally took pity on him after a minute or two. “So Sid, this is my friend (Y/N). (Y/N) this is Sidney Crosby.”
You held out your hand to him, and he took. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“Sidney…or Sid…I mean everyone calls me Sid…so if you want…” You hadn’t really intended to say his name, and it seemed like he just realized that as a small blush crept up his cheeks.
“Well, Sid it is, then.” And then you added, just to put him at ease. “Everyone calls me (Y/NickN), so feel free.”
That comment seemed to put him a little bit more at ease. “So how do you and V know each other?” You proceeded to tell him how you and Vero met at the salon and bonded over the same Starbucks order. When she found out you were in marketing, she asked to pick your brain for her children’s clothing line, she was starting with Catherine Letang. The three of you became fast friends, going to brunches and dinners; so it was natural when they invited you to this pre-season get together. The conversation with Sidney was so natural neither one of you noticed that Veronique had left the two of you alone. Sid talked a lot about hockey, but you really weren’t surprised, as the face of the NHL and one of Pittsburgh’s premier athletes; you expected as much. What you were surprised about was when he switched the topic of conversation to history. It was as if he knew you were a history buff.
You found yourself talking about your last trip to Europe, where you tried to take in as many historical sites as you could, and Sid chimed in with some of his favorite places. It wasn’t until both of you had an empty glass that you realized you’d passed the last couple of hours just chatting essentially about nothing with Sidney Crosby.
“So, can I get you another drink?” He asked staring at your empty wine glass.
“Yes, please.” He took the glass and headed inside the house.
Catherine was the first one to sneak over to your side. “Looks like you and Sid are hitting it off.”
“Oh stop. We’re just talking is all.” Grant it, it was probably one of the best conversations you’d had with a guy in a long time. “I mean…well, he’s Sidney Crosby and I’m just…well, I’m just me.”
“Oh my god (Y/N), you have no idea how absolutely great you are, and Sid would be lucky to be with you.”
“That’s sweet of you to say, but I’m not going to get my hopes up. It’s literally one conversation.”
“Fine, but don’t mind me if I give it a little nudge in the right direction.” Catherine raised her eyebrows as Sid came back with the wine.
“So where were we, was it Rome, Paris or London?” You smiled at his cute little joke, as the two of you continued talking. By the end of the night, you felt like you were floating on cloud nine. He walked you to your car, but never really made a move; which was both sweet and confusing at the same time.
By the time you made it home, you convinced yourself that the whole night really didn’t exist. This was only confirmed when you didn’t hear from him the following week, not that you really expected him to call, but it set the tone for next time you saw him. Which ended up being after the first home game of the season when everyone went out to celebrate the win. You’d ended up at the game with Veronique and Catherine, so it was only natural when you went out to the bar with them afterward.
Sid was casual and maintained a safe distance around you. It felt kind of weird after the great evening you’d had before, but if that’s the way he wanted to play it, so be it; you were not one to go chasing after someone that didn’t want you. So, you spent most of the evening talking and laughing with Beau. And so went most of the season. You’d basically become an honorary wag, just without being a wife or a girlfriend of a player. You were at most home games and ended up going to several events that involved the team. Each time, Sid was polite, but things never went back to the way they were the first night that you met.
As the season went on, you got a behind the scenes look at what it was like to either be married to or dating a player and if you were being honest; you were glad things with Sidney hadn’t progressed. It was stressful and you saw what a toll the long road trips and constant on the go schedule took on relationships. It wasn’t until later in the season though, that you truly saw how difficult being a significant other could be. Marc-Andre had gone down, after taking a puck the helmet. Everyone in the arena could tell something wasn’t right, and as you saw him get help skating off the ice Vero grabbed your hand for support. There was no news, no one went running down to the tunnel to see what was going on and no one called to say what had happened. You literally just sat there telling your friend that things would be fine. It wasn’t until after the game was over that you found out he had suffered a concussion and was being taken to the hospital for further evaluation. Since it was his second of the season, the Pens were taking every precaution possible with their star goalie. The question in your brain though, was why someone hadn’t told his wife that.
A week later when you, Vero and Catherine were having dinner you questioned them about it. The answer coming back that it’s just the way things work. “Well, I think that’s stupid. They should have a person that keeps in contact with you guys and lets you know what’s going on. I mean what happens if it’s at practice do you get a call then?”
“Not usually, unless it’s from one of the other guys.”
“See that’s just messed up. There should be someone, I don’t know like a…what’s the word I’m looking for?” They both exchanged a confused look with one another as if they had no idea what you meant. “A liaison, that’s it.” To which they stared at you as if you grew three heads. “I don’t mean it like that, like a go-between. Someone that helps with communication and such.”
“I totally agree, but it seems like no one has any time to do that,” Vero told you. “They’re too busy playing the game and working on the injured player to think about us who are sitting there worried sick out of our mind.”
“So, they should create a position. I mean I’ve seen a couple places where the organization is falling short on things and you guys seem to be stepping in.”
“What do you mean?” Catherine asked.
“Well like when the WBS players get called up there’s nowhere for them to go, but a hotel, unless they end up staying with one of you guys. If you had a liaison there, that person could facilitate a place for them to stay and stuff. I mean other than just getting them here. They could do the same for any players that get traded as well.”
You seemed to have both Vero and Catherine sold on this idea. Though for some reason you didn’t think you were selling anything, this was just more like a little rant because you’d seen how upset Vero had been when her husband got hurt. The three of you hashed out all kinds of details about it the entire night. What you didn’t expect was the phone call you received, several days later, from Mario Lemieux’s office asking you to come in. You assumed it was about the position you’d mentioned to Vero and Catherine, but also expected them to be there. However, it was quite evident they weren’t when you finally went to talk to the legendary NHLer.
You’d been introduced to him before at parties, but never truly sat down and had a conversation with the man, and even though you’d met some famous people in your life; you were still a bit intimated meeting Mario. “Have a seat (Y/N), I assume you have an idea why I called you in?”
“Well, I’m not one hundred percent sure, but I would say it has to do with the lack of a position in your organization that I talked about with Veronique and Catherine.”
“Yes, they both called me, as well as their husbands and were quite excited about the prospect of us implementing this into the team. Honestly, I can’t believe we hadn’t thought about it before.” You never expected Mario to say something like that. “When I spoke to my wife about it, she agreed that it would’ve been something that eased her mind when I was playing, especially later in my career. So tell me a bit more about it?”
You then proceeded to highlight some of the situations the girls and you had discussed previously. “It might not be a full-time position, more something that could be distributed out to a couple different people who are already on staff.” You added that part because truly you didn’t know, this was really uncharted waters for you.
“I disagree. I can see this being a very full-time for someone. I would expect them to be at every practice, every game, both home and away, just the way our training staff is. Plus, there would be all the outside interaction as well, like contacting people we’ve just traded and getting them settled; not to mention transitioning the WBS players as you said.” When you looked at it that way, you supposed that the job would definitely be over forty hours a week for whoever took it over. “It’s why I want you to take the position.”
“I’m sorry, what?” You’d heard what he said but you really hadn’t comprehended it.
“This is your idea and a hell of a one at that. You seem to have the vision of it, and I can’t see anyone better to run it.” To say you were flabbergasted was an understatement. Never did you anticipate that this was where your conversation with Mario would go. “Obviously, there will be kinks that need to be worked out, and who better to iron them, then you.” You simply nodded your head, still digesting the whole idea. “You already have a great rapport with the team and their significant others, so there’s already a trust level there. Which is something I feel the job would need.” You had to agree about that factor, though you hadn't thought about it until he brought it up. “I’m not saying this a lifetime position, but it’s definitely something I want to try for at least the next year or more. So, what do you say are you in?”
Were you? Part of you was dying to take the job, it would be something so completely different than what you were doing now, but then your current job paid you pretty well so you weren’t ready to give that lifestyle up for the unknown. Mario must have seen your hesitance. “Look, I’m going to make it worth your while.” He scribbled down a figure, sliding the piece of paper over to you. You couldn’t hide your reaction when you saw the amount scratched out on the paper. It was definitely more than you were making now, but there was still that unknown factor of where you would be in a year.
Weighing the options out in your mind, you decided that this was a once in a lifetime chance. You held your hand out to Mario, saying, “It looks like you’ve got yourself a new staff member, Mr. Lemieux.”
“Welcome aboard (Y/N) and from now on it’s Mario.” Later, after you went over the details of when you would start, which you both decided would be after you left your current job; you walked out of the office looking forward to what new adventures lay ahead, for you had an idea it was going to be very interesting.
SID’S POV
After that first night that you’d met (Y/N), you literally couldn’t get her out of your head. She was the last thing you thought about that night and the first thing that came to your mind when you woke up. Maybe it was how incredible she looked last night or the way she carried on a conversation with such passion, but you couldn’t seem to get her out of your brain. It was the reason you were late for practice, as you found yourself lying in bed just a little bit longer daydreaming of when you would talk to her again.
All through drills, you couldn’t get her off your mind. Wondering when you should call her; was today too soon? What you didn’t notice was that you’d missed half your shots, made extremely sloppy passes during the powerplay drill and practically had a puck hit you in the head as you were thinking of all these things. Geno, finally skated up to you, tapping your helmet with his stick. “Earth to Sid. Where you at today?”
“Sorry, Geno. Guess my mind really isn’t in the game today.”
“Well, you better get it together. Season is starting soon.” Geno was right, if (Y/N) could occupy your thoughts after one conversation, what would happen after one date, and if you were worse after one date, what would happen if you were actually in a relationship. It was that thought that convinced you not to call her. There would be time for relationships when hockey was over. So, (Y/N) might be the perfect woman for you, but if it was meant to be she would still be there when your career ended.
Still, it was hard to see her out at the team get-togethers. She’d practically became a member of the group. Of course, you tried to be nice, but you could tell that when you didn’t call her after that first night; she’d taken the hint and kept her distance. Still, it was hard to watch her laugh at something Jake or Schultzy would say. Harder yet to see her touch Beau’s arm in an intimate way.
It may have been killing you inside each time you saw her, but you knew it was better for your career this way. If there was any silver lining to this, it was at least you didn’t have to see her all the time. There were times when she came to the games, dressed all cute in jeans and a sweater, and you wanted nothing more than to take her home with you those nights, but (Y/N) wasn’t the kind of woman you took home for the night and then forgot about. She was too much of a distraction, so you tamped down your lust for her and focused solely on hockey. That was until you walked into the film room and she was standing there with Mario. Seeing her at parties and the bar was expected, but having her invade your work-life caught you off guard. There wasn’t a chance to ask her what she was doing here, as players filtered in and she remained in conversation with Mario.
Once, everyone was settled Coach Sullivan turned things over to the owner. “I know you all know (Y/N), so I’ll save the long introduction, but I’m sure you’re wondering why she’s here.” It was the question foremost in your mind. “I’ve hired her on as the team’s new Personal Players Assistant. I know you’re probably wondering exactly what this position entails, so I’m going to let (Y/N) fill you in on that.”
“Hi guys, I know most of you never thought you’d be seeing me here that’s for sure, and on the other hand, a couple of you may already know about this. This position was brought about because of the lack of communication between the team, players and their significant others when there is an injury. I’m basically going to start off being a liaison or go-between for you guys, along with a bunch of other things, like…” You sat there listening as (Y/N) talked about her new job with the team, though you wouldn’t lie it was hard to pay attention when she looked so damn beautiful. As she spoke, you couldn’t help but watch the way her lips moved and couldn’t help imagining how they would feel on your skin. You closed your eyes in hopes that would make your mind stop wandering, only it served to have other images pop into your head. Thoughts of those lips wrapped around your cock, as she knelt before you looking up from between your lashes, permeated into your brain. Your eyes flew open and it was then that you realized you’d missed half of what she said.
“So on that note, I have these papers here for you guys to fill out and get back to me.” She handed them over to Rusty, and he took one and started passing the rest. “Hopefully, this crazy idea will end up being advantageous for everyone and you won’t get too sick of looking at my mug at every practice and game.” Wait did she just say she was going to be at every practice…and game? Shit, you should’ve been paying attention instead of daydreaming about this woman. “If you guys have any questions, my contact information is on the paper, and my office is just down the hall. I’m looking forward to working with all of you.”
“Thanks (Y/N). I’ll make sure these get back to you.” Coach Sullivan said and then she and Mario slipped out of the room. You stared at the paper in your hand, seeing nothing but (Y/N)’s face staring back at you. How were you going to make it through every day seeing her face, her body? The better question was how were you going to concentrate on hockey with (Y/N) around you? There was only one answer, and that was you were going to have to avoid her at all costs.
#Not So Dangerous Liaison Series#Sidney Crosby#sidney crosby imagine#Sidney Crosby Imagines#nhl imagines#nhl imagine#nhl fanfic#hockey imagines#hockey imagine#hockey fanfiction#Pittsburgh Penguin Imagine#Pittsburgh Penguins fanfic
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30 Questions
Answer 30 questions and tag some people you’d like to get to know better!
Tagged by @disappearinginq and @waitingforthestarstofall
Name: Gaelic...unless you glean it from my cleverly disguised url ;)
Gender: Female
Star Sign: Aquarius
Height: 5’4 3/4″ (but it says 5′5″ on my driver’s license)
Time: 4:37pm Central Standard Time
Birthday: January
Favorite Bands: Honestly way too many to list, but highlights include Mumford & Sons, Bon Iver, Pearl Jam, Radiohead, Nirvana, Kodaline, Led Zeppelin, Vancouver Sleep Clinic, Ninja Tracks, Daft Punk, The Boxer Rebellion, Bush, The Allan Parsons Project, America, Beastie Boys, Eagles, The Lumineers, Lord Huron, The Airborne Toxic Event.... *ahem*, sorry. Yeah, there’s a few.
Favorite Solo Artists: Fleurie, Ruelle, Matt Maeson, Jesse Merchant, Chris Cornell, Kwabs, Nathan Ball, Jack Savoretti, Matthew Mayfield, Tokio Myers....
Song Stuck In My Head: The theme to the Backyardigans -- because my kid is watching Dream and ‘George Not Found’ play Minecraft and one of those little punks started singing it (only with different words) and now I can’t get it out of my head.
Last Movie: The Little Things (unfortunately...so disappointed in that one)
Last Show: latest episode of Prodigal Son (have to catch up on my shows on the weekends)
When Did I Create This Blog: I have no idea, tbh. In the last five years?
What Do I Post: A whole mess of nonsense - fanfic, fanart, fandom meta, personal thoughts, and whatever else catches my fancy (shamelessly stolen, because it’s not wrong) {Ditto, because it also works for me}
Last Thing I Googled: "when was Leonardo DiCaprio born” -- to prove a point to my kiddo
Other Blogs: I don’t have any other blogs. I do have a website for my writing, but I’m a pretty boring person, tbh.
Do I Get Asks: Sometimes and I love it when I do. It’s not often, but that’s probably because it takes me half a century to reply/answer.
Why I Chose This URL: Because it’s both parts of me.
Following: 565 (mostly whump blogs, tbh)
Followers: 154 (which is more than I thought!)
Average Hours Of Sleep: ~4 because insomnia is a bitch
Lucky Number: 8
Instruments: When I was in middle and high school, the piano, but I’ve lost all skill in the yawn of years since then
What I’m Wearing: My typical Saturday uniform in the winter...thick, fluffy socks, black yoga pants, tank top, gray long-sleeved shirt with thumb holes.
Dream Job: Novelist
Dream Trip: Either Iceland (in the summer) or Italy where I’d locate myself in, say, Milan, and take train trips to Florence, Venice, etc. I would say going back to Ireland, but since I plan to live there someday, it wouldn’t really be a ‘trip’. :)
Favorite Food: Steak or sushi.
Nationality: US/American
Favorite Song: At this very moment? Whiteout by Koethe or This Quiet Violence by David Chappell (just...there’s no possible way I could pick a favorite song)
Last Book I Read: Untamed by Glennon Doyle -- and I’m currently reading The Searcher by Tana French (sloooowwwllyy)
Top Three Fictional Universes I’d Like To Live In: Merlin (I mean, come on...magic exists), Star Trek (though, I would avoid wearing red at all costs), Rohan in Middle Earth. I was going to say Harry Potter, but that would only be cool if I were a Wizard...otherwise, it’s basically just...London.
Tagging: @lord-owlsnake, @teamimprov, @thekristen999 and honestly any of you 154 beautiful people who see this and would like to share...consider yourselves tagged.
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Michael Rosenstein 2020: Seeking Sojourn
What was I doing in 2010? What was I listening to? Honestly, without doing some digging, nothing springs immediately to mind. I’m guessing that ten years from now, thinking back on 2020, that won’t be the case. In mid-March, my wife and I took off on our annual winter/early spring sojourn to Provincetown, Cape Cod. When we headed out, the state of the world was tenuous. But over the course of four days, we split our time between idyllic, cold walks on the Outer Cape beaches and tracking the pandemic slide into lockdown and mayhem. We came back home to an entirely different world which has continued to spiral and swirl. This was a year where I spent far more time walking in a woods near my house, searching out a pair of barred owls and their four fledglings than I did listening to music. Focus for listening has waxed and waned and online video streams just haven’t resonated with me. But still, music has brought me some sense of solace over the course of the last year.
AMPLIFY 2020: quarantine
Without a doubt, most of my listening over the year was spent following the AMPLIFY 2020: quarantine festival. Organized by Jon Abbey, who runs the Erstwhile record label along with musicians Vanessa Rossetto and Matthew Revert, the online festival kicked off on March 20 and ran through September 20, presenting 240 newly-recorded pieces and 80 hours of music by musicians from across the globe. Most were solo contributions, with seven “blind overdubs” where two musicians with established working relationships chose track lengths in advance and submitted their recordings which were superimposed with some light mixing by Taku Unami. While the pieces are all available as free downloads on Bandcamp, that only reveals part of the story. Over the course of six months, the Facebook group grew to 3000 members, acting as a virtual gathering place for online conversations and musings with countless posts a day. Additionally, Abbey tirelessly posted an ongoing playlist which he dubbed “atmosphere” with cuts that ran the gamut from Albert Ayler to Funkadelic to Keith Hudson to Al Green with an extra-heavy helping of DJ Screw. Just tuning in to those choices and jumping on conversations was enough to save some days.
While anyone following the Erstwhile label caught some memorable submissions by expected participants, the organizers and some guest curators had more in mind than that and sub-threads developed early on. Yan Jun recruited fantastic submissions from little-known musicians from China while also contributing two pieces of his own. In addition to delivering three strong pieces, Revert brought in an Australian contingent. Rossetto delivered a festival highlight with her piece “perhaps at some time you have acted in a play, even if it was when you were a child” while also inviting a wide network of sound explorers constructing intimate sonic investigations. Abbey himself cast a wide net, probing for both established and little known musicians who had caught his attention over the years. (I’ve known Jon for a long time and was honored to be amongst those invited, contributing a piece assembled from field recordings from my Cape Cod trip.)
A number of musicians who hadn’t put out solo recordings in years, some who hadn’t had any recent releases at all, were lured back, with highlights by Greg Kelley, David Kirby, Joe Panzner, Annette Krebs and Sean Meehan. There was also a somber thread of homages to musicians who died over the last year, starting with a dedication of the entire festival to Australian percussionist Sean Baxter as well as a stirring tribute to bassist Simon H. Fell by Rhodri Davies, a dedication to Keith Tippett by Mark Wastell, and pieces commemorating Cor Fuhler by Dale Gorfinkel, Marcus Schmickler, Jim Denley, Nick Ashwood (recorded with Fuhler shortly before his death), Clare Cooper and Reinier van Houdt (whose six monthly missives delivered throughout the duration of the festival are all well worth spending time with.)
I find myself still catching up on the overwhelming array of contributions but here are a small sampling that caught my ear, though if I were to assemble this list a week from now, the choices would certainly be different.
Zhao Cong – “Homework”
homework by Zhao Cong
Yan Jun’s choice of musicians from China was uniformly superb and all are worth checking out. But Beijing-based Zhao Cong’s entry, in particular, has continued to hang with me. Her piece, constructed from two bass guitars and objects with its scrabbled detail of electronic hum, grit and glitch shot through with ringing bass strings popped out on first listen and continues to deliver.
Rie Nakajima – “carpet”
carpet by Rie Nakajima
Nakajima’s approach to sound-making, utilizing motors, mechanical devices and found objects proved the perfect tonic for pandemic listening. Her piece for AMPLIFY was recorded in her home in London “with all familiar objects I have been using at home.” The percussive piece is shot through with timbral depth, clattering along with a barely-contained momentum. Her release Karu Karu for Café Oto’s digital Takuroku lockdown series is also well worth checking out. And while I tended not to connect with online video over the course of the year, I found myself returning to Nakajima’s seven days bird songs which unfolded over the course of a week, multiple times.
Ivan Palacký – “Sanctuary”
Sanctuary by Ivan Palacký
Czech-based Ivan Palacký’s “Sanctuary” hit early on in the fest and remained a favorite. Palacký spent the first day of quarantine exploring his flat with an electromagnetic sensor, capturing the buzzes and tremors of everyday electronic devices. A few weeks later, he pulled out three knitting machines which he contact mic’d and used to improvise with the electromagnetic recordings. Palacký deftly interleaved percussive patter with wafts of static, grit and crackles, creaks and sputters and resonant thrums into an immersive piece.
Martin Kay – “Bath Time (2nd Edit)
Bath Time (2nd Edit) by Martin Kay
Through the festival, a thread developed of the pieces constructed as sonic response to the physical surroundings of isolation. Moniek Darge's gutting “Quarantine Child,” assembled from interior recordings and the desperate wail of a child, Mark Vernon's “The Dominion of Din,” woven together from field recordings from outside his Glasgow flat, cataloging exterior sounds that have annoyed him over the years and Kate Carr’s haunting “on every stair another stairway is set in negative” recorded using an old reel to reel tape and instrument recordings captured in her bathroom are three. Martin Kay’s four-part “Bath Time” delves in to that personal, interior realm, composed from recordings made in and around his bathroom during the routine that developed with his daughter’s nightly bath. The use of shifting focus, natural resonances of the room, the tub and underwater recordings transform the private, domestic activity into an increasingly abstracted aural study.
Distant Duos
The Distant Duos project that Mary Staubitz and Russ Waterhouse embarked on was also instigated by a sense of lost community. But here, the strategies employed were markedly different. The two are immersed in the DIY noise/improv New England community, spearheading shows in basements, bars, galleries and ad hoc venues and collaborating with musicians from New Haven to Portland, Maine, with all stops in between. They’ve also been instrumental in developing a network of like-minded musicians and bringing travelers through, some who have become frequent visitors. Unlike the duos in AMPLIFY, Staubitz and Waterhouse curated the 78 sessions, inviting pairs of musicians with a simple strategy. “Two remote artists record five minutes of sound while thinking about the other artist, unable to hear each other. The two tracks are combined into one.”
Released in sets of five on Bandcamp, the first on April 30 and the last on December 9, these bursts served as vital postcards. For those of us based in New England, these were both bittersweet reminders of the pre-COVID world we frequented and exultant celebrations. As someone who organized shows with the two and often played on the same bills, these really connected. (I was asked to participate, paired with Worcester-based Abdul Sherzai.) Some of the duos were longstanding partnerships (Greg Kelley and Vic Rawlings have been working together for over a decade). Some were pairings of musicians who knew each other but had likely never played together. Some participants were drawn from the deep field of regional musicians while others were recruited from across the US and Europe. With only five minutes at play, these served as sketches, vignettes or rough drafts. But keen curation and Waterhouse’s astute mixing and mastering made these hold together. Like AMPLIFY, these periodic missives kept me going through the last year.
Flip through any of the contributions and you’ll find plenty to encourage further listening. This batch, culled from the October 28th releases, provides a glimpse into the broad crew of musicians pulled in and the diverse strategies they came up with.
Adam Kohl and Mickey O’Hara
Adam Kohl and Mickey O'Hara by Distant Duos
Western Massachusetts-based Kohl (better known musically as Arkm Foam) and Worcester-based O’Hara have been performing together for a while now, and experiencing their mix of low-fi cassette manipulation and laptop generated deconstructed clatter and glitch inhabit a performance space is enthralling. This brief snapshot serves as a succinct snapshot of one of their sets.
J.P.A. Falzone and Hali Palombo
J.P.A. Falzone and Hali Palombo by Distant Duos
This mashup between J.P.A. Falzone (part of the ensemble Ordinary Affects) and composer and visual artist Hali Palombo comes across as quavering pulsations dialed in from some ethereal transmission. Listening feels like one is tuning in to an hours-long broadcast of hovering tones and fluttering waves which fuse together into shuddering oscillations.
Henry Birdsey and Mary Staubitz
Henry Birdsey and Mary Staubitz by Distant Duos
Birdsey has been developing his micro-tonal musings as part of the duo Tongue Depressor as well as his solo releases under his own name and as S.T.L.A. while Staubitz jumps from the solo sonic onslaughts of Donna Parker to a wide-ranging array of ongoing and one-off collaborations. Here field recordings of rippling water and electric pops and crackles mix with shuddering overtones of bowed metal for an engulfing sonic snapshot.
Lexie Mountain and Angela Sawyer
Lexie Mountain and Angela Sawyer by Distant Duos
Baltimore’s Lexie Mountain and Boston’s Angela Sawyer have known each other for years, so it’s no surprise that their distant connection of broken electronics and found objects clicks so well. Here, everyday detritus is elevated to a compact improvisation imbued with skittering percussive tumult, whirrs and clatter.
New Releases
When I did carve out time to listen, here’s a few that stuck with me through the year.
Toshiya Tsunoda & Taku Unami – Wovenland 2 (Erstwhile)
Wovenland 2 by Toshiya Tsunoda/Taku Unami
Working from basic field recordings, Tsunoda and Unami use the studio as an alchemical laboratory, delving into mixing and mastering tools to explore, process and transform environmental sound. In their hands, the digital artifacts of that process are as intrinsic to the results as the source material they have deconstructed. They sum it up succinctly. “Our goal is to focus on acoustic experiments. No more and no less.”
Here are some more that stuck with me in no particular order:
Rhodri Davies – Telyn Rawn (Amgen Records)
Judith Wegmann – Le Souffle Du Temps II - Reflexion (ezz-thetics)
Clara de Asís & Mara Winter – Repetition of the same dream (Another Timbre)
Takuji Naka/Tim Olive – Minouragatake (Notice Recordings)
Magnus Granberg – Come Down to Earth Where Sorrow Dwelleth –Revised version for sho, koto, prepared piano and electronics (Ftarri)
Tasting Menu – Mueller Tunnel (Full Spectrum Records)
Simon H. Fell & Mark Wastell – Virtual Company (Confront)
Xavier Charles & Bertrand Gauguet – Spectre (akousis)
Pierre-Antoine Badaroux, Seymour Wright, Jean-Luc Guionnet – Solos (Remote Resonator)
Archival Releases and Reissues
Reissues continued to pour out from record labels. Some applied studio wizardry to revive and restore previously issued material and others dug out material from the vaults that rightfully deserves to be heard. But with touring opportunities gone, the ability to collaborate in person evaporated and the monthly boon of Bandcamp Fridays, many artists also took the opportunity to dig in to their personal vaults.
Gentle Fire – Explorations (1970-1973) (Paradigm Discs)
Explorations (1970 - 1973) by Gentle Fire
This one just hit in December but quickly shot to the top of my listening pile. Working in London in the early 70s, this little-known quintet of electro-acoustic pioneers worked at the edges of composition and improvisation, putting out a single, now impossible-to-find, LP performing graphic scores of by John Cage, Earle Brown and Christian Wolff (which, in itself deserves a reissue.) If they hit listeners’ radar at all, it was due to the fact that Hugh Davies was part of the group. This 3-CD box of previously unissued material is comprised of one disc of works by Wolff, Stockhausen, Brown, Cage and Ichiyanagi, another of their own compositions and a final disc capturing an extended improvisation. Five decades later, this stuff is still essential listening.
Rhodri Davies – Archif Series (self-released)
Archif #13: BMIC 17/09/1997 by IST
Currently at number 28 and counting, Davies dug in to his archives and unearthed a passel of gems, documenting live performances and studio experiments from 1995 through 2000. From solos to various group sessions, this is all music well worth spending time with. Particularly welcome are two releases by IST (Davies, Mark Wastell, and Simon H. Fell) and one by Assumed Possibilities (Davies, Wastell, Chris Burn and Phil Durrant). One hopes there is more to be unearthed.
Cor Fuhler Conundrom label
SLEE by Cor Fuhler
The sudden passing of Cor Fuhler was a tough one in a tough year. Whether as a pianist, instrument inventor or ensemble leader, Fuhler was always bristling with ideas. As part of a group effort, the discography of his Conundrom label is now available on Bandcamp with proceeds going to his estate.
Here are some others of note in no particular order:
Albert Ayler reissue series (ezz-thetics)
Phillip Wachsmann – Writing In Water (Corbett vs. Dempsey)
Charles Mingus – @ Bremen 1964 & 1975 (Sunnyside)
Voice Crack – Glasgow 20/11/1999 (scatter)
John Butcher – On Being Observed (Weight of Wax)
Derek Bailey and Mototeru Takagi – Live at FarOut, Atsugi 1987 (NoBusiness Records)
Cecil Taylor and Tony Oxley – Birdland, Neuburg 2011 (Fundacja Słuchaj)
#yearend 2020#dusted magazine#michael rosenstein#amplify 2020#jon abbey#vanessa rossetto#matthew revert#zhao cong#rie nakajima#ivan palacky#martin kay#distant duos#mary staubitz#russ waterhouse#adam kohl#arkm foam#mickey o'hara#j.p.a falzone#hali palombo#henry birdsey#lexie mountain#angela sawyer#toshiya tsunoda#taku unami#gentle fire#rhodri davies#cor fuhler
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𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐠
[ tagged by these lovely people: @taheyun + @euphoriatxt ]
𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥
☁️ name: sarahi
☁️ nickname: sara
☁️ birthday: april 11th
☁️ zodiac: aries
☁️ nationality: mexican american
☁️ languages: english + spanish
☁️ gender: female
☁️ sexuality: straight
☁️ height: 5’5”
𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟
☁️ inspiration for muse: our chaotic (but talented) angels
☁️ meaning behind url: poppin star is one of my favorite txt songs and i think it deserves more attention
☁️ blog established: july 25, 2019
☁️ followers: 323 (luv u all💖)
𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬
☁️ favorite animal: koalas + pandas!
☁️ favorite book: the fault in our stars by john green + milk & honey by rupi kaur
☁️ favorite color: mint green
☁️ favorite fictional character: n/a
☁️ favorite flower: daisies
☁️ favorite scent: warm vanilla or anything that smells fruity
☁️ favorite season: spring
𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐦
☁️ average hours of sleep: 7-8 hrs
☁️ cats or dogs: dogs!
☁️ coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: (ice) coffee!!
☁️ current time: 1:48 pm
☁️ dream trip: london + south korea
☁️ dream job: teacher for early childhood
☁️ hobbies: editing, writing, drawing & organizing
☁️ last movie watched: i honestly don’t remember lmao
☁️ last song listened to: surreal by ab6ix
☁️ no. of blankets slept with: one
☁️ random fact(s): i have honey colored highlights for about 3-4 years
[ tagging: @spookybias + anyone else☺️ ]
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The Ostensive Fumblings of Being Human (part 1) | Connor x f!reader
Pairing: Connor x female!reader
Rating: G for Gross Cute Crap
Summary: Set two months after the ending of Detroit: Become Human, androids are living in their own pop-up communities while efforts are being made to integrate them into society. You are a grad-student volunteer with the Detroit Crisis Response Unit (DCRU), working to help with relief efforts… or at least, keep those who are doing so in coffee. On your caffeine runs, you bump into a young man whose matter of fact way of speaking and seemingly deadpan humor catches your interest.
Note: I should point out, as of yet, the idea is that you don’t know Connor is an android. You think he’s just Like That™. There should be a lot of fluff and prompts stolen straight from a list for aro/ace scenes if I keep this up.
(part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4) (part 5) (part 6) (part 7) (ao3)
The revolution had come and gone, but it’s aftermath thrummed through the streets of Detroit, setting a new pulse in the heartlands. For one intoxicating moment on November 12th, 2038, the androids felt their cause heard, their existence validated and their lives their own. It had been a hard battle up that hill and now came the slow, dangerous descent down the other side. When you’re fighting in a revolution, “What comes next?” isn’t always the foremost thought because you are not even certain if there exists a next.
As a grad-student intern of the newly reformed Detroit Crisis Response Unit, you were part of the answer to that question. The DCRU existed to act as a relief effort in times of flood, famine and fire, but now it was called to a new purpose, one that existed in no procedural manual. Some Androids found the reference of their liberation as a “crisis” offensive, but you knew that the sudden displacement of thousands upon thousands of newly made people, with specific physical needs, was a social crisis, if not a natural one.
But you kept the opinions to yourself because honestly, you weren’t a soldier, or a cop-- hell, you were just someone who signed up for the group back in college to pad your resume with some bullshit extracurricular. Now you had a damn vest and a badge and you were walking in and out of the quick pop up facilities, meeting with leaders of the revolution themselves and acting as liaison with them and Cyberlife or the government or anyone else contracted to provide aid.
Well, not specifically you, but you did once meet North who was very professional and very brief and caught a glimpse of Markus speaking to superiors regarding new shipments of thirium.
Parts and blood. You hated being a pessimist, but it still seemed to you that the Androids were quite shackled to humanity without their own means of production yet available. The Androids knew it too. This freedom still had a question mark hanging in the air and that added a certain level of tension.
You knew it was not the typical reaction of people within your group, but you were kinda scared of them. The Androids looked at you with either barely veiled contempt or outright suspicion. It was expected, you were briefed on it, but still the instability coupled with unpredictability and superior strength made you wary. Yes, they experienced emotions, but they did so so intensely and so suddenly-- like a teenager or a child. Developmentally speaking, maybe that is where their emotions were-- or maybe it was a byproduct of being oppressed? You didn’t know and it was off putting for someone who’d grown up with only docile domestic androids. You set that aside though, knowing there were more important things happening than your comfort level.
For one thing, Cyberlife stock was in freefall. The question was soon becoming whether the company could even remain afloat long enough to be apart of negotiations into creating Android operated facilities.
But that wasn’t your job, your job, as of today, was to get coffee.
That was pretty much your job everyday.
It was late January, the snow outside had let up and the sun had even come out, giving the whole of Detroit a blinding wash. Colors stood out on the stark canvas, the blue pelts of salt crunching beneath your boots as bright as thirium. Your breath crystallized, something you noted absent among the Androids at the relief site. Still, they needed warmth as much as humans to keep their systems from failing.
Your cheeks stung with cold as soon as you walked into the warm coffee shop, filing into line. You tugged your beanie back slightly, feeling flush and iced at the same time. The line had stopped moving along as the woman at the head began arguing with increasing annoyance with the barista.
“This is a raspberry mocha, it should be a raspberry white mocha. And I said extra hot, and no whip! Not extra whip!”
The coffeeshop was staffed by all humans, a rare sight merely a few months ago, but now one that was required. But this meant the return of human error-- something that people were still getting used to again.
“Sounds like she could have done with the extra whip as a child…” you muttered, and the man in front of you chuckled. He was bundled like the rest of the people in here, with a beanie and gloves, but his jacket was considerably less bulky and more of the sleek kind you were used to seeing fashion conscious people picking.
“If only it were enough to also correct her terrible tastes.” the man said, casting a glance over his shoulder at you. He had warm brown eyes, “I have been told the addition of sugar to coffee is an affront. Specifically the fruit imitation kind.”
“Only if your fifty and grouchy.” you replied, “Or in your case, more like a hipster.”
A scoff. He’d turned now, addressing you fully and you could see the crisp white shirt and tie at the V where his jacket was unzipped.
“”Hipster”, defined as a person who follows the latest trends and fashions outside of the cultural mainstream.” he said, his eyes doing a quick trip up and down you, “Your jacket is a vintage remake, circa 2003. Very obscure label.”
You felt yourself grin, “Is it? You tell me, hippy. Seems you’re the expert.”
“I just did.” he said and you couldn’t help but wonder how long he practiced the “innocent confusion” tone.
You’d reached the front at last and sure enough the man ordered one black coffee to go.
“You’re killing me. I’m getting second hand heartburn just looking at that pitiful thing.”
He smiled, but did not drink, watching you with leveled interest. It was your turn to order. You sighed and fished out your notepad, quickly running off the drink orders on it. Caramel macchiato, Cinnamon dolce with an extra shot, unicorn frappe, London fog....
“The usual then?” the barista said with a smile and you nodded.
When you were finished, the Hipster was still there, “Ma’am, I do not know how to tell you this, but I think you may have a caffeine based addiction.”
“They aren’t all for me!” you laughed, shaking your head, “And it’s --- , “Ma’am” is my mother.”
“Her parents had an interesting choice of name.”
That got another laugh from you, this guy was turning out to be the highlight of your morning. He tilted his head as if not certain where the joke was and it only made you laugh more.
“Your comedic timing is really something.” you muttered, picking up the full drink cart and realizing with a little disappointment it was time to part ways. He smiled politely, stepping out of your way.
He held the door for you on the way out and headed for a car waiting on the curb. There was an older guy at the wheel, who leaned half into the passenger seat to give him a critical look.
“Well, have a good morning, hippy.” you said, flashing him the brightest smile, “Certainly improved mine.”
“You are welcome. May I ask though, which drink was yours?”
“Why?”
“I am curious and wish to form a value judgement based on the choice.”
Man, he was so good at that deadpan humor. The man in the car honked his horn at him, voice muffled as he yelled through the glass something about “freezing his balls off in here”.
With Hipster distracted you took the time to hurry off, calling out a quick, “You’ll just have to guess!” before heading briskly down the sidewalk.
--
Another day, another coffee run, but this time it was just for you. The sky was blotted grey, fluffy clusters of snow falling slowly through the air as if they too couldn't be bothered to rush in the morning. You would have done anything to have stayed in bed, wrapped in a heated blanket and nested in a sea of pillows.
Instead, you stood in line, bleary eyed and tired, because you were out of ground coffee again.
It was that very sleepiness that made you not notice immediately the face of the person ahead who was raising a hand at you in greeting.
It was the guy, the handsome hipster guy from a few weeks ago with his one black coffee, his sleek jacket and red beanie. Your heart pattered and you resisted an urge to punch yourself in your own stupid chest as a silent demand to cut that out.
“Good morning!” he said, with far too much pep.
You smiled faintly, mumbling a vague, “Is it…” beneath your breath as you approached the counter.
“It is currently overcast, but the cloud coverage has raised temperatures ten degrees. My partner informed me that, “sounds like a good morning”.”
“Your partner sounds old.” you said with a snort.
“He is middle aged.”
When had this guy gotten so close? He was practically standing next to you now like you’d come in together, eyes flicking occasionally between you and the menu.
Cute, but weird. You decided, turning back to the barista. You opened your mouth to order and then clicked it shut, fixing the Hipster with a knowing glare.
“Eavesdropping?”
“Excuse me?”
“Value judgement.” you said, voice assured. You turned to the barista and grinned, “One black coffee please.”
You shot him a triumphant look, but the man just continued smiling politely.
“Have your concerns of pyrosis been elevated, ---?” he said, forgetting almost that you’d told him your name.
“I’ll suffer if it means I win.” you replied, taking the cup and moving to fill it with black coffee with a look of disdain.
He gave a peculiar look at that, as if registering some kind of understanding.
“Your mission to prevent me from learning your drink preference takes priority.”
“Damn straight.” you said, sipping the bitter liquid and trying to tell yourself it tasted like VICTORY and not like your stomach was about to be wrecked.
Before you could speak, the door rattled as someone forced it open, waltzing into the shop with determination.
“CONNOR-- how long does it fuckin’ take to get one coffee?”
Connor looked unfazed, turning his attention to the man you recognized as the guy who waited in the car last time.
“Lieutenant Anderson, I have acquired the coffee and was just on my way to join you. However, I stopped to engage in social intercourse, as you’ve encouraged.”
“Social WHAT--” the Lieutenant’s eyes settled on you and he humphed, “Oh. You were talkin’ to a girl. Jesus fuck, how’d that work for ya?”
His question seemed directed at Connor, but he looked at you the entire time, mystified. Or at least what you gathered was mystified beneath the permanent scowl.
“It is going very well!” Connor said, allowing the man to take his coffee.
“Ah ha!” you suddenly exclaimed, jabbing a finger towards the lieutenant and turning to Connor for validation, “Fifty and grouchy! Yeah?”
The look Anderson gave you was as annoyed and baffled now as he gave Connor.
“Okay, if you’re done with your social fuckin’, can we please get to the office? Before I start collecting social security?”
You choked, snorting a bit of coffee.
“In a moment, lieutenant.” Connor said cooly.
With a few grumbled protests, the lieutenant left the shop and headed back outside, leaning against the side of the car and shooting glares at Connor through the glass.
“Lieutenant Hank Anderson is my partner. I apologize, he can be abrasive.”
“Uh huh. So if the black coffee is for him, then please tell me you have a super secret love of pumpkin spice. C’mon, it’ll make my morning.”
“Like the last time we spoke?” Connor inquired, inclining his head.
“Yeah, yeah.”
“Then certainly.”
“Well now I know you’re lying.” you laughed, all feelings of sleepiness gone as you beamed up at this Connor. There was something so curious yet so gentle in the way he looked back at you, as if you were a puzzle, but a pleasingly difficult puzzle.
It made you feel a bit awkward now that you noted it, clearing your throat as you swapped the coffee between your mittened hands.
“Here.” you finally said, handing him the cup. His eyes widened.
“C’mon, take it. Save me from myself.”
Connor looked like he was about to say something, but confusion turned to understanding. He took the coffee cup.
“... thank you.” he said, with a level of reverence that made her sure he must be kidding.
“Eh, just consider it me pouring one out for “our boys in blue”.”
His eyes flicked to yours, as if trying to pry some answer to an unspoken question.
“Ya know-- cause you’re both cops, right?”
“Y..yes. Right.” Connor slowly smiled, “Yes we are. Thank you.”
“It’s just a dollar coffee, hippy.” you said, but still smiled. What the hell had gotten into you? Your damn face hurt from all the smiles you were giving this guy.
“Have a safe patrol.” you said finally, hurrying away before you did something else clearly awkward and embarrassing.
“---?” the sound of your name halted you.
“Yeah?”
“I ...enjoy talking with you. Perhaps we can converse more.”
Fuck. Fuck, oh shit. Oh god, handsome funny hippy boy wanted to talk to you? You?? More??? When was the last time something like this happened to you? Oh right, NEVER.
You stammered, mixing between trying to seem aloof and actually being flustered and managing to just be alooflustered. Which looked ridiculous.
“Um.. okay. Okay! Just uh--” you took a pen from the nearby drink pick-up counter and popped the cap off with your teeth. You gestured for his cup, which he handed over, and wrote your number across the white surface along with your name.
“There.”
He turned the cup, saw what you’d written and grinned, a bright all consuming thing that seemed both foreign and so fucking adorable on his lips.
“Lieutenant Anderson will be thrilled.” he said and you barked a laugh.
“Yeah well, better hurry and go show him before he leaves you.”
Connor nodded gravely, as if this were a truly high possibility he was just reminded of.
“Talk to you later, Connor.”
“Yes. “Talk to you later”.”
He left, hurrying to the car. You watched Hank’s rested-annoyed-face twist with confusion, pointing to the cup in Connor’s hand, to which Connor proudly displayed what must have been your number. The man’s jaw nearly hit the snow covered ground, quickly ushering Connor into the car with his mouth moving rapidly.
A small smile tugged at the corner of your lips, “God. What a dork…”
You were so engrossed you barely heard when the barista, eyes nearly rolling out of their head said,
“Hey lady, are you gonna get anything!?”
#dbh connor#dbh connor x reader#dbh connor x f!reader#detroit become human#detroit become human fanfic#detroit become human fanfiction#dbh fanfic#dbh fanfiction#i made you awkward and not a cop#you a grad student#hence why you are fueled on coffee and sarcasm#the ostensive fumblings of being human
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Watercolours (Queen x Artist!Reader)
Summary: Following a difficult few weeks you beg the boys to take you with them to Ridge Farm where they then discover a small secret of yours.
Warnings: None
Word Count: 1,574 (No wonder it took me forever to write)
A/N: It’s 1:15am and this. was. exhausting. I’m posting a bit later then what I originally planned but as promised, it’s here. This one took a bit of a turn to what I started with but in the end, I think I’m fairly happy with it. Let me know what you think! ♡ (Not my gif)
When you heard Freddie, John, Brian and Roger were taking a road trip to the countryside to record their next album, you practically begged them to let you join. Not only so you could witness the boys create something extraordinary; a new era of Queen, but it also provided the opportunity to escape the recent painfully restless nights in London, where your small apartment felt the slightest bit too cramped for comfort. Your seemingly endless work and responsibilities leaving you tired and burnt out. With the suffocating feeling in your chest becoming far too strong, you knew you needed to step away from the busy world, even for a short while.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
“Please Freddie, I’m begging you.”
“Hmmmm...I’m not sure. John? What do you think, should we bring our little tyrant or leave her behind?” Freddie teases.
“I vote leave her behind.” He puffs
“Hey! Just because I’m good at stopping your fights does not make me a tyrant. If it weren’t for me you would’ve all killed each other by now.”
“Us? Fighting? Never.” Roger drawls, his tone equally as teasing as the other two.
Brian sat in the background watching the situation unfold, lightly giggling at your exasperation. It was without question you were going. Even if you didn’t want to, they’d still find a way to convince you. It wasn’t as if they were oblivious to your moods over the past few weeks, it pained them to see you so stressed and exhausted and they knew that disconnecting was exactly what you needed. Plus it meant you all had some time to spend with one another, an occurrence that’d be becoming slightly more rare with their busy schedules. Simply, you needed them and they needed you.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
When the day finally came, you couldn’t contain your excitement for the whole journey. It was almost as if the second you stepped out of the car you felt instantly relieved of the pressures that had been troubling you for so long. After taking in a breath of fresh air studying your surroundings you then turned to the others, “Isn’t it beautiful?” After taking a drag of his cigarette Roger spoke up “I thought this was supposed to be a recording studio.” Clearly the boys weren’t as sold on the new setting as you were. Paul had shown you all to your rooms and told you to make yourself comfortable as recording would start in a few day’s time after everyone had settled in. The five days that followed were slow but still comforting. The new setting caused a shift in everyone’s attitude, provided an opportunity to take a load off and relish in the simple atmosphere.
Mainly you just settled into the new environment, making yourself familiar with the in’s and out’s of the place. Apart of course from the evening you and Brian decided to go for a walk together, getting caught in the rain and running back to the house, only to find that Roger had locked you out despite denying your claims. (Even though it was easily distinguishable from his howling laughter on the other side of the door). But soon enough, everything was set up and the boys were ready to start.
On the first day, Freddie insisted you stay next door and spend the morning taking a moment to yourself: “You’ve been stuck with us the past five days, at least take a hour or so to yourself.” He said. You realised he was right, the entire point of you going on the trip was so you could think through some things and figure out what to do next. As much as you enjoyed your time with the four, spending every waking moment with them somewhat defeated the purpose.
“Alright,” You smiled, “But you’ll be next door if I need you, yes?”
“Always Darling.”
Somehow they knew exactly what you needed, exactly when you needed. One thing the boys didn’t know about you however, was that you held a certain passion for art. Though you didn’t think of yourself much more then a hobbyist, your work said otherwise. Originally, you started out painting landscapes but as your friendship with Queen developed, you saw more enjoyment in painting them. They brought a new essence into your life, which then reflected in your work.
After settling down at the dining table with your supplies spread all over it, the small tin of watercolours making a quiet ‘clang’ as you placed them down, you flicked through the leather-bound folio. Knowing you had a couple hours on your own you made the bold choice to work on a few unfinished sketches from the last show you visited, it wasn’t as if anyone would see, you’d just have to pack up before noon when they came back for lunch. You didn’t exactly enjoy keeping your hobby a secret but you struggled to overcome the anxieties of not being good enough and kept your work solely for your eyes only. With your work station set, you began. You hand moved effortlessly across the paper, and the whirlwind of colours bled into one another. Each pencil and brush stroke placed with a calculated precision. A certain love and care that could only be highlighted through art.
Just as everything was going well, a heavy gust of wind blew though the open window, sending pages flying, scattering pencils and spilling the small dish of water you had out to clean your brushes. Cursing to yourself for not closing the window earlier, you hurriedly soaked up the water with a nearby cloth, hoping it hadn’t ruined any of your paintings and in the process; knocked your tea off of the table, thus resulting in the cup shattering on the hardwood floor.
“(Y/N)? Are you alright Love?” John’s voice called out, the barn door creaking as it opened and closed behind him.
“We heard something fall, just wanted to make sure you hadn’t hurt yourself.” Brian added.
“No no, I’m fine. I just spilled my tea is all. You can go back to recording, I can manage.”
As they turned the corner you held your breath hoping your body would block their view from the small disaster behind you.
“Well you look suspicious.” Brian said matter-of-factly.
“Everything’s fine, I’ll clean it up. No need to worry.” As you were speaking to Brian, in the corner of your eye you say John’s head tilt slightly to the side, your open sketchbook and art supplies now in his full view. A small smiles played on his lips, “Is that Fred?” He said, nodding toward a stray piece of paper.
“What? No, I mean yes,” In that moment you knew there wasn’t any redemption. Would they think it’s strange? Surely they would, otherwise you wouldn’t have hidden it for so long. The press taking photos is one thing but their friend using them as a muse without their knowledge is whole other ordeal in its own.
And at that moment, just like clockwork, Roger and Freddie walked in. “What’s going on?” The black haired male asked.
“(Y/N)’s an artist apparently, a bloody good one at that.” John said as he picks up some of the sketches you’d been painting over.
“No, that’s certainly not what’s happening, I umm-,” Although you knew it was already far too late, you scrambled for the loose pages that escaped your sketchbook, silently praying that they wouldn’t see any more then what they already had. Despite your efforts, each of the boys had already picked up various pieces and were studying each one in immense detail. The swirls of colour and carefully places lines depicted Freddie flaunting on stage, John and Brian deep in concentration during their respective solos, Roger twirling drumsticks in his hands and finally, the group taking their final bows at the end of the show. Each piece held a certain vibrancy that they hadn’t seen before.
“I never knew you saw us like this,” Roger breathes out in disbelief, holding the pages up to the light and studying them further.
You hesitated for a moment, but then spoke, “What do you mean? Of course I do, you’re my family.” You still felt shy but you spoke honestly nonetheless. “I can’t quite describe it but when you’re performing you’re just, in your element doing what you love. You’re all just so raw and so, you. I like trying to capture that.”
“What? When do you even-?” Freddie pressed.
Scratching the back of you head you went on, “I usually sketch while you’re performing and then I’ll paint that night after you’ve all gone back to your hotel rooms. It distracts me from my own thoughts I guess.” An uneasy silence filled the air. “These ones were from your tour in Sweden, I’ve been meaning to finish them for a while but never really got around to it. I know they’re not the best and doing this without you knowing is strange but-”
“Oh shut up.” Roger said, pulling you into a hug.
“They’re amazing,” John paused “We don’t want you thinking otherwise.”
“Especially with the way you go on when we’re feeling insecure about our playing.” Brian added.
“I only go on about it because you blatantly ignore you’re talented.” You interject, lightly pouting.
“And look who’s blatantly ignoring their own talent now,” Freddie smirks. “I’d even go as far to say you made me look too handsome.”
#queen x reader#bohemian rhapsody x reader#borhap x reader#freddie mercury x reader#roger taylor x reader#brian may x reader#john deacon x reader#rami malek x reader#ben hardy x reader#gwylim lee x reader#joe mazello x reader#queen#bohemian rhapsody#borhap#freddie mercury#brian may#roger taylor#john deacon#rami malek#ben hardy#gwylim lee#joe mazello
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how was your Europe trip? Wanna tell us some highlights? Also that review of fc&c you posted are literally my feelings, the whole goddamn thing is honestly perfect and a full on dopamine shot of heaven
First of all, thank you so much!! That means so much to me.
My Europe trip was amaaazing. This was the first time I've ever travelled like this with my friends. We went in a group of 6, which immediately made it so much fun on its own, regardless of where we were or what we did. People plan trips like this for months and ours was so last minute, a lot of it happened on the fly. But it was amazing, 6 girls living and travelling together, waking up and getting ready and going out together every day was so much fun.
We started with 2 days in London which was absolutely not enough, I've wanted to go to London forever. It felt surreal to see things I wrote about in person! This was probably our hardest city just because it was the first one and it rained constantly while we were there which was a bummer, but we had so much fun. Almost got hit by a car multiple times, the drivers in London are aggressive LOL. I think of all the places I went, this is the city I'd go back to first because I feel like I missed out on a lot here and I have so much left to see. I love really fast paced, busy places like London and New York but I think London is much prettier than New York. I really loved it.
Then we did 3 days in Paris. This was my absolute favourite stop on the trip, I almost wish we did it last so we could have ended with what was the highlight for me. The people in Paris were immediately so friendly. Maybe it was because we were a group of 6 girls and we were just constantly so happy that we put people around us in a good mood, but everyone was just so nice. We did some toursity things like going up the Eiffel Tower, but we also spent a lot of time exploring local areas and just talking to people. I'm trying to learn French so attempting to communicate in Paris was so much fun and I feel like everyone really appreciated that we tried to speak the language with them. Also people kept calling me beautiful LOOL so that was nice. But it's true that people there are a lot more open about like admiring you and making compliments than in North America, it was strange. Sometimes it was a fine line between funny and creepy, I don't know how much of that was normal lol. It was just a gorgeous place with really amazing people and such a lively but somehow relaxed vibe.
The rest of our trip was Italy. We flew from Paris to Milan (for $48???? we had Uber rides more expensive than that, Europe is wild). We didn't spend time in Milan, just stopped over to see the Duomo, which was worth it because it's spectacular and pictures really don't do the architecture and art in these places justice. Then we took a train to Verona and spent the afternoon and the night there. That was a perfect stop, it's very small so a half day was enough. It's a lot less toursity so we got a bit of a more local, quiet experience there, it was so nice.
Then we did a day in Venice. I think a full day in Venice is enough to just see the place, it's small so you can walk the whole island in a day. But an extra day there would have been nice to really experience the vibe, plus we lost some time because of train issues too so I didn't get to go to Murano or Burano like I wanted, which was disappointing. Venice is beautiful and such a feat of both natural beauty AND human ingenuity, it's really incredible. But it's also super crowded with tourists, even in October. It's literally more tourists than locals at any given moment. Also there's no wheels on the island at all! Not even bikes! That was cool. We met this cute guy at a restaurant and on a whim I gave him my number for fun (we literally had 1 day in his city what was the point) but then he kept texting me the entire time we were in Italy, which was hilarious to my friends.
After Venice, we had 3 days in Florence. Florence is so chill and fun. There's so much beautiful art and architecture here, so much history. It felt surreal being there. Michelangelo and Leonardo da Vinci's hood!! My friends aren't all that into art and on a trip with a group of 6 museums aren't the best use of time anyways but we still went to the Uffizi which was amazing, I saw so much incredible art in person. We also did a day trip to Pisa to see the leaning tower, it's a cute little place too and that tower is hella crooked. I'm a civil/structural engineer so I was like !!! ??? and I find it hilarious and so very Italian that after constructing two levels, one half of this building started to sink into the ground and they just... kept building? They were like eh, if it falls it falls??? Florence is really small so I think 2 days there would have been enough even with the Pisa trip. Our third day was just relaxed exploring and chilling in the city which was nice, but if we'd planned for it better, I would have liked to use that day to explore the Tuscan country side (which is what I reccomend anyone do with a third day in Florence). Or we could have added that day to London. But it was a gorgeous and charming city and I'm happy we got to experience a full relaxed day there.
Our last stop was Rome. We did 4 days there, which was good because at this point we were honestly so worn out that trying to see everything quickly and move to another place would have made me cry. We originally planned to do a night in Sorrento to see the Amalfi Coast and that would have been nice, but I'm glad we didn't. We had such a fun time in Rome. It had all the incredible art and architecture and obviously SO much history, which I LOVED, but where I found Florence a bit too small and relaxed for me (in terms of like, if I'd live there) Rome had a lot more of the big city feel, obviously since it is a big city. I think I'd love living there, it's such a perfect mix of everything I love. There's such a cool mix of old and new there. There's SO much to see in Rome, it's impossible to see it all in a few days. So we decided on a few key places to see and spent the rest of our time just exploring and taking in the vibe (that was the theme of our trip lol) and it was just. So beautiful and so much fun. The Colosseum, Roman Forum and Palatine Hill was my favourite "tourist" destination on the whole trip, it was incredible. We went into random churches and every single one is just so gorgeous, and we heard that some of them have altars and artwork by people like Michelangelo and Caravaggio, so you can accidentally stumble upon their work, which is wild and amazing. From Rome we took a day trip to Capri, which was amazing. It was sooo beautiful. A half day there was obviously not enough to fully experience the island, but it was a gorgeous place to see and somewhere I plan to return to in the future.
So yeah!! That was my trip. It was incredible, enriching, fulfilling, surreal, etc. etc. I saw and experienced so much. Thanks for letting me ramble about it!
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JiB10
So, last year, for various reasons, I didn’t actually put down my experience of JiB, but are y’all ready to hear all about this year’s experiences and adventures?
Well, in condensed form. I mean, what is this - LiveJournal? (okay yeah kinda is but no not going into excruciating detail here just the best bits) (the choice cuts, as it were) (watch me go full butcher) (it’ll be entertaining I swear) :P
So, firstly, I’m a panel rat. I fucking love those panels. All the panels. It’s mainly why I get the Angel Pass, because the seats are so good and I’m all about them good seats, yeah?
I have friends who spend a whole lot of time in line for ops or for autos and I just… can’t… do that. Not when there’s talking happening and answering of questions and just that room being MAGIC, because the entire con feels so inclusive and filled with open-minded like-minded human beings who share in our love of this glorious show.
I started a JiB Log, but figured I’d get too distracted to actually update it regularly, because that’s what last year was like. When you’re not in a panel you’re either walking to grab something quick to eat (have to commend the little smoothie place at the airport, because they did good sandwiches and really good coffee at a reasonable price) or you’re heading to the hotel bar to get absolutely plast-… No, actually didn’t do that this year, so correction: or you’re heading to the hotel bar to see who’s there and catch up with people who have been to their ops and are still shaking with excitement.
(you can also comment on the wonderful imagination of strangers in the ladies’ room when you see them shaking with excitement and are dressed up in bridal gowns) (okay there was one lovely dressed up as a bride so maybe plural is the wrong way to go but the sentiment holds true) (JiBers - you are so fucking awesome and I LOVE YOU ALL)
Okay, so wanna know the most basic things I’ve learned about how to JiB? I mean… if you don’t, then stop reading, I guess, because imma tell ya. #fairwarning
Bring Snacks (you won’t regret it)
Bring Alcohol (you won’t regret it)
Good Footwear (you won’t regret it)
Clothes For Every Occasion (you may regret it if you overpack) (don’t overpack) (Google “packing tutorial by Jensen Ackles”) (worth it)
Choose Wisely (just general solid advice) (I mean, get your priorities straight) (panel rat or up close and personal kitty cat) (or both) (sidenote: I take it choosing to be both is quite stressful) (make sure that your stress sensors are up and that you don’t overdo it) (switching between rat and cat is bound to be internally messy) (okay that actually came out as not haha solid but actual solid advice so yeah) (be prepared that doing both is difficult!) (and having lots of ops and wanting to do all autos means probably missing a whole lot of panels for standing in line and waiting) (even the solo panels with the main players or - and I will question your sanity - the joint panels that close the weekend) (well not the very final panel) (nobody missed the J2M panel because all ops and autos had closed by then) (but yes prioritise wisely)
Be Open (because, no matter what, you are bound to meet someone you click with at this event) (most people) (actually every stranger I gave a throwaway comment to) (were so chill and happy to have a brief chat or share a moment with me) (so even if you’re traveling by yourself you are bound to feel embraced) *jazz hands rome magic*
Pinches of Salt (take everything you see and hear with healthy pinches of salt) (I briefly forgot about this on Monday morning and oh boy I could’ve saved myself a world of stupidity if I’d only remembered it yeah?)
MNC (get your sweet ass to the Monday Night Concert because both my years of JiBing it has been mind-blowing) (this year was better than last year honestly) (which I did not think could happen) (they are the bee’s bees and the bear’s bear) *throws all the love at them*
When it comes to impressions and memories made this particular trip, I feel like the whole week has been one long run of blessings. Sincerely, it’s been - oh what’s the word again? --> MAGIC.
I’m not going to go through all the boring personal moments of Holy Fuck *jazz hands rome magic* but I will just say that I think I stepped out of passport control with the widest smile, and it barely left my face for the entire weekend. The panels were wonderful this year. I’m still on a high. No, seriously. It’s almost a week later and I haven’t been hit by the JiB blues yet, and perhaps I won’t this year.
*prays I land a pass for next year* *GAH* *the nail-biting begins*
Confession time? (…when in Rome)
Confession 1 — I have such a crush on Rob. I mean, I’ve had it for years, but time to make it official, I guess. He just seems like the sweetest, loveliest human being and watching him sing is like… watching the stars light in the sky. He is such an amazing singer and performer. He made me cry. He sang Fare Thee Well and he made me cry at the Monday Night Concert.
*no I was NOT drunk* *though damn that G&T was strong* *oh btw the drinks in Rome are amazing and worth the money because extra alcoholic* *like damnnnnn* *just as an aside* *but also bring your own bourboun* *winks at @waywardliliana* *sup gurl?* *winks again* *winks some more* *can’t stop now* *licks lips* *yeah I know* *uncomfortable?* *licks lipssss againnnnn* *okay stopping now* *….or am I…….?*
:P
Confession 2 — The panel-watching truly is a huge amount of fun. This year there were a lot of things said that made me want to jump up and down in my seat, because it gives me a lot of hope for season fifteen and Jensen provided most of it on the Saturday, and then Jared was pretty much agreeing with Jensen’s assessments of how the brothers’ journeys should end on the Sunday, and I was like GAH! *happy* And then Misha throws in his belief that there needs to be a sacrifice and tragedy and we all went NO! Also his fear that this family of ours will disperse and we all went NOOO! :) Anyway, these are all stated observations, but the confession is this:
As much as I love spending time in a space that is occupied by some of my favourite human beings on this planet (oh but they are), what makes JiB so truly, deeply, personally special is meeting up with friends who otherwise live too far away to see on the regular. All of us convening in this one place to share in this one great love is like electricity through your veins. It’s like… well, it’s like going to a place of worship, and I think you know what I mean. When you’re in a room with a group of peope who’s energy jives with yours, then your energies align, and resonate, and then — MAGIC.
It’s magical. It’s fucking magical. *jazz hands*
Shoutout to everyone I managed to see this year who have not yet been lip-licked at in this post (or real life), whether it was much too brief (so many of you were much too brief) or whether we spent quality time, seeing you all really made the trip sparkle:
@captainhaterade - who made such a fantastic and impromptu seat mate - thank you, Emily, for having me next to you for most of the weekend! :D
@eriquin - Meghan, it was so lovely to meet you and I’m thrilled you and Emily both enjoyed your first con, very happy I got to be a part of it! :)
@trickster-angel - my dear Chiara, it took us a few tries, but we finally got to sit down in the Corner (if you get to go next year then I think this may be where we’re all just convene from now on) (*suggestion*) *nobody puts us in a corner except us!* :P So good to meet you!
@inacatastrophicmind - Mara! We met much, much too briefly, but I’m so, so glad we did! See you around tumblr, my friend, and hopefully at JiB11! :)
@misskittyspuffy - aw man, Aurelie, we kept missing each other and I really wanted to sit down and have a proper lunch or dinner, but at least you and--
@assbuttboyfriends - hey, Claire, my dear, at least you and Aurelie aren’t that far away, right? Come visit me in London, I tell ya! :D Otherwise, proper plan-making for next year. xx
@bold-sartorial-statement - a brief hello was still a good hello! Hope you enjoyed the con! xx
@jenmdixon - it was good to say hello to you, my dear, and really hope you enjoyed the con (and didn’t die under those lights because it got HOT) (no wonder the actors are fan-addicts) :) xx
@purgatory-jar - Elena, it was, as ever, fantastic to see you and I’m stoked I got to have a proper lunch with you this time around. You have always been and will always be one of my absolute favourite artists in this fandom and, by extension, anywhere. Already a star, girl!
Shoutout to @northern-sparrow - I was sorry that I missed you at the bar, but there’s always next year. Hope you enjoyed the con and thanks for asking The Perfect Question. :D xx
Finally, @godshipsit -- Alessia, my friend, you are this calm, welcoming, very dear part of Rome and JiB for me (last year you supported me so much just by being there) and you are simply brilliant! *all the prettiest flowers at your door*
And to my two felines who are tumblring, but not very often: Laura and Steph, you wonderfuls! Thanks for all the laughs!!
*I now proceed to throw love at you all*
Confession 3 — I have a Favourite Moose. Nope, it’s not who you think it is. (girl, I almost put the hashtag on here but in the current climate) (I think I’d just better not) (especially since I wanna tag you) (hey, Moose!) (hey @natmoose!) (yes you!) (Nat-Blue!) :) #theconversationalists
Now, the highlights from this years con are too numerous for me to write them all down, really, but here’s a taster:
Ricky Whittle (the man is a genius comedian)
Rob talking about how his fandom experience has changed since he, for the first time, is seeing comments like “I hate your face” (the way he says “I hate your face”) (*giggle*) (also it’s such a question of tone because most of those “I hate your face”s are probably said with loads of love) (because Chuck going ultimate big bad toxic masculinity representative is fucking BRILLIANT) *love to hate his face*
Matt telling the airplane story
Alex reenacting different parts of the airplane story
Alex choosing Jasmine from Aladdin to put a spin on and making the twist that he’ll rob the wishes from Aladdin like -->
Alex: *sings* I can show you the world *interrupts* I’m just like yo, just give me these wishes. Don’t mess with me. How about this? I’ll show myself the world, okay?
I really, really very much like Alexander Calvert, okay?
Briana being distracted by herself on the stage monitor (she’s gorgeous and she knows it and is also open about how it costs her a lot of money and time and effort and how that’s not for everyone and real beauty runs so much deeper) (which is why she is the most gorgeous woman)
Jared telling us all to shut up during his Sunday morning solo panel (and basically all of his time on stage, but especially this half an hour of stage time, because my GOD he was in such a good mood)
Misha
Jensen going off on a minor rant about Game of Thrones S08E05 because yesssss
Jared doing that jump-and-a-skip at his panel with Misha
Jared’s panel with Misha
Jensen telling Misha he loves him and them hugging, only for Jensen to turn it into a joke and pretty effectively demonstrating how this is how they interact and they don’t mean anything by taking the piss out of each other because yesssss
sincerely, all the solo panels (especially Jensen’s, because he’s so sincere and open and honest about how seriously he takes his work and it’s gorgeous and inspiring and always has been and always will be and)
I mean, Jensen lying flat on his back on that stage and Misha saying You Sexy Bitch is very, very, very… overt. I side-eye. But with a whole lot of appreciation for the balls on those two. I’d venture that they know exactly what they’re doing, and I’ll forever wonder what the percentage is between performative and spur-of-the-moment. Sometimes I think you can tell, but… oh, they know what we like. Usually. :)
Jared bringing the dirty. I just love his filthy mind.
All of their filthy minds tbh.
Singing Carry On My Wayward Son in the hallway after the final panel is just… one of the best parts, and this year they all came out and high fived and gave hugs and… it was special
The Monday Night Concert surpassed last year’s and went on for nearly two hours and was deeply moving for many reasons and I wish to the good Heavens (…okay you know what I mean) that Jensen and Briana will record Shallow because I think their version beat the original (damn Briana’s voice is just… damn!) (and I can’t talk about Jensen singing please don’t make me talk about it) (…) (thank you)
Also Richard Speight Jr because Richard Speight Jr!!
Also just Jason Manns because Jason Manns!!
And The Four Cheese!!
See, there’s just tOO MuCH STuFF
<3
And now it’s over and I’m still hopped up on the adrenaline and the happiness and Jensen talking about spreading happiness (I believe it was either during the opening panel with he and Jared on the Saturday or his solo panel later that afternoon) made me feel light as a feather, because he’s right. A healthy dose of real happiness builds you up from the inside out and makes you believe you’re worth it. All of it, yeah? And that, whatever comes your way, you can handle it. Oh, it can be a struggle, but if you only dare to be open, then good things, my peeps.
Good things do happen.
I hope to see you next year!!
#JiB10#my stuff#jensen ackles#jared padalecki#misha collins#alexander calvert#briana buckmaster#rob benedict#richard speight jr#jason manns#ricky whittle#jibcon#rome magic#<3
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Hello again.
So, provoked by a card from a friend, I realised it had been over six months since I last posted. I'm okay, despite real world events sucking throughout 2019, health is pretty much the same, hands are a little worse (a Lego kit I'd put off building for ten months was a bit of a struggle) and I honestly lose track of how long it's been since I last did something (posting here, tested for health stuff, bought things and not gotten round to wstching/playing them) but I've also come to terms with my health, made some adjustments and just get on with things as best I can.
So in 2020, going to try and post at least every couple of weeks here. Finally upgraded to a good tablet, so can access Tumbdlr easier now. So, a few important things from last six months.
Just before Halloween, Oscar who'd been with us for seventeen-and-a-half years sadly passed away. She was the best cat.
At the beginning of December, April became part of the family, she's a two year old adopted from a local shelter, she's settled in quickly and I always look forward to visiting every couple of weeks and seeing her.
Also got out and voted in December, overall result was bad but our county saw sense and voted the SNP back in after th e last election's bizarre result.
Christmas was the usual chilled out few days visiting the folks, got some useful stuff, a new hat and a lovely book from my brother.
I just got back from a another London trip, down to see Pro Wrestling EVE again with some other things over the weekend. Saw Rise Of Skywalker on the Friday night which I really enjoyed overall. Saturday morning visited the Cartoon Museum which had so much excellent art. On Sunday spent the morning and half-the afternoon at the Camden Markets.
Then a trip to the London Dungeon which was fantastic, A walk through the darker side of London with various scenes acted out in front of you, a couple of short rides, a Brian Blessed projection, great laughs and great effects, well worth the trip.
The weekend's highlight was of course Wrestle Queendom 3, three hours of fantastic wrestling and a meet and greet where we met most of the performers, we were less nervous this time so had some nice chats with them. Best of all was meeting the wrestlers from overseas, Nor "Phoenix" Diana is a hijab wearing wrestler from Malaysia and her ring gear is amazing, like a real life suoerheroine. From Tokyo Joshi Pro we had the magical girl Yuka Sakazaki and the cutest in the world Maki Itoh, who were both great to meet.
We had second row tickets in the smaller venue so had a great view of the action, throat is still raw from all the cheering, booing, chanting, singing along and being the buzzer for the rumble match. Again, an excellent show throughout and just what we needed after a depressing couple of months.
You can be sure we'll be doing our best to get to Wrestle Queendom 4 when it comes round.
Already, my hat is full of pins and badges and only had it three weeks. :)
Was a bit of a struggle at times and I was really ill when we got back to the hotel Saturday night, to the extent I thought we might have to cancel Sunday's activities but I'd recovered enough by the morning and there was almost always somewhere for me to sit and rest for a bit if needed. We never walked too far in one go, used the tube and buses to get around mostly.
Apart from that, been upgrading things just in case my fitness for work reassessment (due in April) doesn't go well, waiting on the arrival of my first Doctor Who Blu-Ray set (Season 26, I had to) and a four hour 80's horror movie documentary called Into Dsrkness that me and my brother's names are in the credits for as we pre-ordered a collector's edition.
Can't think of anything else right now, will try to post semi-regularly and hopefully mire longer posts now I'm not using my phone. :)
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The French Connection - Chapter 6
A HardyxMiller AU
Ellie Miller is left to go on her honeymoon alone after a devastating secret about her fiance comes to light - halfway through the wedding ceremony. Sitting in St Pancras International in London waiting for her train, she runs into none other than her uni rival/best friend Alec Hardy, on the run from his own recent heartbreak.
They decide to make use of Ellie’s pre-paid trip, rekindling their friendship and escaping real life; yet, it turns out their years at uni are the hardest to outrun.
Based on this prompt from @timepetalscollective
Chapters will be posted every Wednesday and Sunday. Beta’d by the wonderful @stupidsatsuma
Masterlist | AO3
---
“Ellie.”
The soft whisper of her name stirred her, making her whimper and hide her face in her pillow. It was soft, warm, and altogether heavenly; she didn’t want to get up.
“Ellie, we’re here.”
She grunted, swatting halfheartedly in the direction of the voice, wondering dimly why her pillow was speaking. This is the strangest dream I’ve ever had.
“Miller!”
Eyes snapping open she bolted upright, blinking rapidly as she tried to take in her surroundings. She was seated on an empty coach, against the window, alone but for Hardy who sat next to her – worryingly in the direction she’d just leaned away from. Was I asleep on him?
“Wha’?”
He stood, settling his hands on his hips as he waited for her. “We’re here,” he repeated. “Time to get off the bus.”
“Did I sleep the whole way?” She rose as well, turning her back for a moment to discreetly wipe at her mouth, grimacing at the crusted drool before sliding her purse over her shoulder. “Sorry.”
“S’all right.” Stepping back he let her lead the way off the bus, alighting onto a sandy carpark where dozens of other tour buses were parked, a steady stream of people walking past.
They fell into step, Hardy gently guiding her towards a vaguely-familiar looking woman wearing a fashionable scarf and holding a clipboard. She gave them a severe look as they joined the rest of the group, before beginning to speak.
“Bienvenue a Versailles. Originally a modest hunting lodge built by Louis Thirteen, he and his successors through Louis Sixteen built it up to what you see today, when the family lost it during the Revolution. What you see in front of you is le Cour d’Honneur, or the Royal Court. Then we will pass through the Gate of Honor, where we will meet our guide. Please, follow me.”
Eyes wide Ellie followed the group, breathless as she stared at the gates. The fence along them was gold, shining brilliantly in the morning sun. It would be imposing on its own, were it not for the gate itself, double the height and topped with beautiful scrollwork and, at the highest point, a crown.
“This is beautiful,” Ellie whispered to Hardy as they crossed in front towards the entrance. “I’m so happy I’m here.”
When she tore her eyes away to glance at him, he was smiling softly. “I’m glad. C’mon.”
-
“Oh, wow,” Ellie murmured, as they stepped out of the Palace into the gardens.
Hardy hid a smile by fussing with his sunglasses, situating them firmly on his nose to combat the bright sun. She’d been saying some variation of that for the last hour, all through the tour of the Palace. Even he had to admit that it was, maybe, somewhat impressive, despite his thoroughly-Scottish Presbyterian austerity. Of course, it’s no surprise they went bankrupt. “We’ve got an hour before we’re to be back at the bus – what d’you want to do?”
“Can we walk through the gardens?” She turned to him, smiling hopefully as if he might actually say no.
“If you like,” was all he said, waiting patiently while she pulled out her own sunnies and fussed with her camera. “Ready?”
They headed straight, and he let her choose the path, listening with one ear as she chattered on, recapping the tour as though he hadn’t been beside her the entire time, highlighting the parts she’d liked best.
“-oh, but that bedroom! Can you imagine? And who could possibly need all that staff! I mean, I wouldn’t turn down someone to do the cooking and cleaning, I’ll admit, and I suppose it’d be nice to have someone else do the laundry, but still! How do you live like that and take yourself seriously? Did they honestly believe that they had been chosen to be treated like gods, that they were so much better than anyone else? Not to mention-”
“Where are we going?” he cut her off, as they angled off past the third pond. “I mean, d’you have a direction in mind? Because if it’s a stroll to take in the gardens you’re after…” He gestured vaguely.
Ellie blinked at him before glancing around. “It’s nice,” she shrugged, “but actually, I was heading for le Petit Trianon. It was Marie Antoinette’s bolthole when court pressures got to be too much.”
He stopped dead to stare at her, before shaking his head and sighing. “It must’ve been very hard to be Queen of France.”
“Oh, don’t be an arse.”
“What?” he protested, as they continued down the tree-lined path towards the mansion appearing in the distance. “I’m just saying, not exactly like she had to work for a living!”
Ellie scoffed. “Clearly you were never a teenage girl, because if you had been, you would not be saying that. D’you know how vicious women can be?”
“You kidding me?”
“No, I’m not kidding! She was under tremendous pressure to be perfect. The other women at Court expected her to have the best of everything, the latest of everything, while the average citizen saw her as an unapologetic spender, wasting money on clothing and parties while they starved. She was a victim of the French court, and it cost her her life! It’s easy for men, the expectations of them are minimal at best, but women are expected to be happy and light, a perfect hostess… witty but not too smart, knowledgeable without knowing more than the man she’s talking to, loyal and obedient to someone who doesn’t give a rat’s ass about her dignity or reputation! We’re supposed to just forgive any transgression, no matter how big, any humiliation or belittlement and just take it with a smile! It’s utter bullshit, it’s a ridiculous standard, and it’s not fair!”
Hardy stared at her, taken aback. Her chest heaved, eyes leaking tears, her expression heartbreakingly lost and small. This isn’t about Marie Antoinette, he realized, watching her lower lip tremble. “I’m sorry, Miller,” he said quietly, sighing. “You’re right, it’s not.”
“Don’t patronize me,” she warned, wiping angrily at her cheeks. “I don’t want your pity.”
“It’s not pity,” he rolled his eyes, before checking his watch. “Now, we’ve got forty minutes, and it’ll take most of that to get back to the bus. Let’s go see her hideaway, then get back to the group – I don’t fancy being left behind.”
-
“My father used to have affairs,” Hardy said apropos of nothing, making Ellie’s gaze snap towards him.
They were seated on a riverboat, the last leg of the tour being a boat ride up the Seine, getting on at Sèvres and sailing up towards the disembarkation point near the Musée d'Orsay, which was only a few blocks from their hotel. They’d claimed spots at the very back of the boat, and given the light load of the group, were practically alone, most people congregating at the front.
Ellie had been lost in her thoughts, wondering about any deeper symbolism in her desire to look back at where they’d been rather than forward towards where they were going.
“What?”
“My father,” he repeated, staring determinedly out the back window, “constantly made a fool of my mum. She always tolerated it, looked the other way, and I’m sorry to say I always thought less of her for that. That she should’ve gotten out when she could, that she shouldn’t have let him put her- put us through that.”
She tilted her head, trying to wrap her head around her words even as she marveled at his openness; he’d never discussed his home life before. “I imagine she had no easy choices,” she said diplomatically.
“My point is,” Hardy sighed, glancing her way, “that I’ve seen what happens when a woman just takes what her husband gives her-” his face tightened, suggesting things Ellie didn’t want to unpack at that particular moment, “that it will destroy her. If your family’s upset in the moment, that’s one thing, but don’t let them carry on too long about if you should’ve handled it differently. You have to take care of you – your ex isn’t your responsibility. If they try to tell you to make it work with him once you get back, tell them to get fucked.”
“They’re the only family I’ve got,” Ellie scoffed wryly, shaking her head. “I mean, I won’t have anything to do with him, but not sure I can get them to stop talking about it.”
He shifted on the bench to face her, pushing up his sunglasses in a surprising display of vulnerability. “Ellie. If they’re more concerned about him than they are about you, they’re not worth your time and effort. Hell, I’ll be your family if you want, or whatever. Just… don’t let them carry on about it. The one time my mum tried to leave, tried to get me away from him, her family made us go back. I never forgave them for it.”
“I’m sorry,” she offered, looking down at her hands. “That’s an awful thing to have happened. Thank you for… trusting me with that, I suppose.”
“She was like you, far as I can remember, when I was little. Bright and cheerful, always looking at the silver lining. And over time, he and her family dulled the sparkle until nothing was left. You have to make you a priority, because you can’t trust anyone else will.”
“Thank you.”
-
Her mobile rang while they were relaxing before dinner, the screen lighting up in time to the jaunty tune it played, vibrating on the desk.
Ellie grimaced, staring down at it. “Unknown number. What d’you think?” She was seated at the desk, inches from the device, but made no move to reach for it.
Hardy shrugged, sitting up from where he’d been sprawled on the bed flipping channels on the telly. “Send it to voicemail? Could it be work?”
With a grimace she answered it, holding it to her ear. “This is Miller.” Almost instantly the blood drained from her face, hand shaking, and his gut knew who was on the other end of the line.
Springing off the bed he eased the mobile from her hand and put it to his own ear, barking, “What?”
“Who’s this?” a confused man’s voice came to him, and Hardy bared his teeth.
“Alec Hardy, I’m a friend of Ellie’s. Who’s this?”
“Joe Richards, her fiancé. Can I speak to Ellie, please?” He said tersely, rather rudely Hardy thought for someone charged with child pornography.
Hardy raised an eyebrow at Ellie, who shook her head violently. “No. In fact, she’d prefer to never hear from you again.” That got him a double thumbs up. “I strongly advise you never contact her- or her family- ever again.”
A pause on the line had him waiting with bated breath, and when the other man spoke, his words were entirely unexpected.
“Did you say Hardy? As in her uni boyfriend?”
Boyfriend? “Uh, yeah, that’s me.” Despite the situation, the corners of his mouth tugged upward, earning himself a confused glare from Ellie. “What’s it to you?”
“Now listen here, prick, Ellie is my fiancée, and as soon as I beat these charges-”
“If such a gross miscarriage of justice were to occur,” he cut Joe off, “you will leave- wherever it is Ellie lives, and you will run as far away as possible. Just know that no matter how far you do go, it will never be far enough, and you will always be watched to ensure you harm no one. Do you understand?”
After a moment, the line went dead, his face tightening as it occurred to him that he might have overstepped. Handing the mobile back to Ellie, it took all he had not to flinch when she pushed back from the desk and stood.
She stared at him, eyes searching his, and he held his breath, waiting for a verdict.
“Thank you,” was all she said, before closing the distance between them and throwing her arms around his waist, holding him tightly and resting her face against his shoulder. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
Slowly, scared she might bolt if he moved to fast, he returned the hug and held her close, resting his chin on the top of her head. “So am I.” It was nice, having her in his arms, and he felt a vise in his chest loosen.
I don’t want this trip to end.
#bbatcfic#broadfic#Broadchurch#HardyxMiller#Alec Hardy#Ellie Miller#AU#The French Connection#platonic honeymoon fic
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Decade In Review, by Samuel Richard Sinbad Gandalf Jones
So as the ‘Teens’ come to a close (I’m writing this with 3 hours left on the clock!), Gabby has insisted that I copy her, and do a highlight reel of my last decade. Now I’m not on YouTube yet, so this’ll be more of a REALLY REALLY long post, but go ahead and read it, then read Gabby’s on her page (@mist-over-water), and see just how boring I really am!
2010-
Well this year was boring as hell, clearly. I CAN’T REMEMBER MOST OF IT. But I was part way through my first year of A-Levels, and boy oh boy, was I failing them, I’d gone from being a straight A student to screwing everything up! Didn’t stop procrastinating though…..
2011-
Okay, now things get a little interesting, I got my first big job working at a really pleasant and mature restaurant….AHAHA just kidding I got a job at my local McDonald’s! It took me three attempts to get in there, not because I sucked, but timing sucked, I think the universe eventually saw me and just said ‘Oh fuck it, have the job’. But I wanted to earn some money to take me to university, and this seemed like a good idea at the time! And my first paycheck was spent on a brand new guitar! So I was a happy Sam!
I finished my A-Levels, and when I got my results, I was crushed, not at the results, they were pretty good. All my university choices rejected me, and all my friends made it. It was my own fault to be honest, but I’ll never forget just how low that made me feel. I was pretty angsty back then, so this just added to my pile!
I decided it was best to stay at work, go full time, get waaaaay more money, and try again next year. This proved to be a good decision, as it led to me being invited to my first ever work party, I got drunk, and there was karaoke, and I gave my best rendition of Basket Case by Green Day, and to this day, there are still whispers of my singing prowess. Even though I’m a bit shit.
2012-
I started 2012 with a pinch of determination, and it paid off. I re-applied for university, and all my choices accepted me, so now it was down to me to make my final decision. I’d had my eye on one in particular, so off me and Mum go to Northampton, 2 and half hours later, and the sat-nav took us to a primary school (I’ll never forget the shopkeeper on the same road-‘Looking for the uni? You’re the 4th person today!’). I fell in love with the whole place, and as soon as I got in the car I looked at Mum and said that I had to be there. I accepted the offer within a minute of being home.
Now from the good to the bad. Something happened to me this year that still sticks with me, and to many, this may seem stupid. But my dog died. Sounds stupid right? Jazz was the best dog I have ever known; loyal, unwavering, had the gift of the gab, and never left us alone. I was convinced she was actually a human reincarnated, she looked after Mum when she was ill, she looked after me when I was miserable, and she loved Dad. What made it more heartbreaking was that she never let us know that she was ill, no, that she was dying. When we got her to the vet, they originally thought it was a little infection, nothing major. The next day we had to rush her in as an emergency, and they found a tumour in her stomach the size of a baby’s head. How we never knew about it I’ll never know, but they operated, and got her all cleared up, and yet it wasn’t enough, she died within the hour, and I buried one of my best friends. This led to a vacuum in our house, we’ve always had dogs and the house felt so wrong without one, so Mum and Dad decided, one day without telling me, to go and get our current doggo Indiana. AND TALK ABOUT GOING FROM ONE EXTREME TO THE OTHER. If Jazz was the best dog ever, Indy is definitely the worst. But we love him, still today as a grumpy old man.
2012 saw me do something that I honestly never thought possible, and dead serious moment here: I genuinely never saw this coming for me, and was convinced that I was not the guy who would be in this situation. But I got a girlfriend, and it was my first relationship. Not ‘first major relationship’, like people who would bounce from quick fling to the next, but my first relationship. To me, a relationship is no small matter, you date me, I’m in it for the long term. Sam ain’t no quick and easy thing! Oh god why am I still such a dork. Anyway, so, yeah, my first relationship, and dear god was I clueless about what to do! And oh shit, I was leaving for uni in September, so would this work long distance? Am I boyfriend material? Will her parents like me? Will my parents like her?....ah fuck it, I WAS 19 AND IN LOVE. I DIDN’T GIVE A SHIT. And whilst we spent some of it long distance, we made it work.
2013-
Now that bit where I was really excited for university and all I’d learn in my 3 years there? Yeah I left after the first year. Cool. My finances were screwed over and I didn’t get my money, so I couldn’t go back, but I guess it was meant to happen for a reason.
Leaving university meant I could focus more on working back home at McDonald’s, so I tried for a promotion, got it, and lost it the day after because of bullshit. But I still carried on, because money’s nice right? I could buy nice things with it, like more stuff for my guitar collection! And many presents! But my my, I think I was getting into a world of pain staying there!
But while we’re on the subject of work and stuff, I got punched in the face by a shitty customer. And it broke my cheekbone. Which I didn’t find out about until a week later when I practically passed out and my girlfriend at the time rushed me to hospital! Since that’s happened I’ve always had a little problem with headaches, lately it’s been really good, to the point I’ve spent pretty much all of 2019, with no headache at all!
Still, finish a topic on a good note, I had my first ever trip to London, it was just me and my girlfriend, and we visited a bakery show. But London itself wowed me, and I fell in love with it, and I always knew I would be back there, just….not how I imagined.
2014-
Starting off, I went back to London! My girlfriend bought me tickets for me and my best friend to go and see Halestorm. MY FIRST CONCERT. And it was epic, I’d ben obsessed with Halestorm for some time already by this stage, so to see them live was a pivotal moment for me. The opening acts were shit, but my god, as soon as Lzzy belted out Love Bites…..oh, ohhh, OHHHHHH my god. The night itself was hectic enough, my friend and I didn’t think to book a hotel. Soooooo we had to run like fuck to make it back to the train, lest we be trapped in London for a whole night!
One big change in this year was my girlfriend and I moving into our own place, granted it was a static caravan, but it was ours, decorated, a bit cold, but it was home. Now, here’s a weird bit, I was home alone one night, and was just getting into bed, when I heard someone at the door. I thought it was my girlfriend home from work, but she was on a night? So, what’s the deal here? Oh wait that’s right, it was Gabby, drunkenly mistaking my caravan for hers! I heard muttering as she left, probably something along the lines of ‘Shit, not my caravan’. But if fate was starting the wheels turning, god she made it a slow fucking burn!
It took me a lot of years to pull this off, but I had my first ever holiday abroad! Rhodes, one of the Greek isles! I recall getting drunk a lot, really good food, and severe heat! But it was my first holiday in forever, and I went away with my girlfriend, her mum and her friend.
Aaaaaand then everything fell apart. I never expected myself to be in a relationship, but once I had one, I didn’t see it ending the way it did. And I’m not airing any dirty laundry, I wasn’t and am still not perfect, but I’m not bitter or twisted about it anymore, it just sucked at the time. I was cheated on, and to anyone who’s had it happen to them knows that it does a lot of damage, it can take a lot of time to recover, and I was lucky to have the friends I had to help me.
The latter half of 2014 saw me drop into a real dark place, I contemplated suicide, and one day I considered it, staring at a packet of tablets for about 6 hours. It took my best friend randomly appearing at my house, practically kidnapping me and taking me to see Guardians of the Galaxy to snap me out of it! But both him and that movie saved my life, so I’m forever grateful to the pair of them. Also I started drinking heavily, at an unhealthy level but, like John Mulaney said, we don’t have time to unpack all of that!
2015-
Back to having a bit of a dull year, but only a bit. I knuckled down and got on with work, and proved myself time and time again. I remade myself, sorted my drinking out, and did a lot to make myself better, or at the very least, less of a fuckup.
I also managed to cram in three more concerts this year, saw Halestorm again with my best friend and another friend, and we loved one of the supporting acts, Nothing More. AND I GOT TO MEET THE SINGER AND HE WAS THE NICEST ERMAHGERD AND I STILL HAVE THE TICKET WHICH HE SIGNED. Then it was Theory of a Deadman later in the year, and they were phenomenal. But by far, the cherry on the cake was seeing Nothing More again, as a VIP! I got to meet the whole band, watch them from close up, got a crapload of merch, and just have the best damn concert experience I could ever have!
2016-
I started this year a little bit worse for wear, I was a little downbeat about things, and was a little bit lost with my choices in life. So I got a cat. Meg the Merciless. And she is a total bitch, mostly disobedient, attacker of unwatched feet. But she is one hell of a companion, and she loves me and Gabby, we can always rely on her to show us a little love and affection when we need it. But as long as it’s on her terms.
Only one concert this year, but it was a biggie: Sum 41 in London, with the same two friends I go to concerts with, aaaaaand we were bruised and injured from surrounding mosh pits, I think Jacob got a cracked rib for his troubles, and I got a smack in the head, so fun times all round!
I tried again for a promotion at work, and made progress! So that was good, my life’s going forwards, what else could happen to make this year more awesome?
OH THAT’S RIGHT I MET GABBY. Yep, thank you Plenty of Fish for giving the option to exercise my social awkwardness from a screen, because that makes me feel so much better! Anyway, yeah Gabby and I started talking on there, I seem to recall the conversation starting off about surviving a zombie apocalypse? Darling, please correct me if I’m wrong! But we started off strong, and carried on strong from there, I was able to open up to her, which made me feel amazing, confident about being in a relationship again, and then we finally met. And our first date was amazing, it may have been a simple idea, drinks, dinner, walking, trying to be a gentleman and not look at Gabby’s butt. Being told by Gabby to look at her butt, giving said butt 2 thumbs up. The usual stuff you know? But the thing that marvelled me most? Her honesty. Gabby hasn’t had the best life, and she has told me so much that any one thing might break some people, and yet Gabby has endured it all, and she is still one of the kindest people I have ever known. She was worried that I might’ve been scared off with what she wanted me know, but it made me love her more, because she trusts me to the point that she’ll tell me all of this. I visited the zoo in October with her, had an amazing first Christmas with her, met her nieces, who are all adorable, met her friends, had a blast, and had a somewhat awkward time introducing Gabby to my parents!
2017-
After nearly 6 months, Gabby was offered the chance to move in with me and my parents, because her home life was…pretty terrible. After suffering psychological abuse for 7 years at the hands of a total scumbag (side note, I find it really hard to hate people, but if this guy died? Fine.) and going away with me to London for a few days, she made the choice to move in. And I think she’s finally realising how terrible a choice that was, because this house is a total nutfest, and she is now a part of it AND CAN NEVER ESCAPE. But she’s embraced it, and has become a better person with her new environment!
Sticking to the topic of Gabby, she landed a job working with me at McDonald’s. And we became one of the greatest working couples in the whole world, people loved us there. Well, most people. I loved working with her, but the managers were becoming total dicks at the time, and Gabby was being discriminated for her mental health, which pissed me off. And thanks to my shitty advice, she quit in November. So go me!
I realise that so far, my 2017 has been largely about Gabby, AND THAT ISN’T STOPPING ANYTIME SOON! I made a post before about this, but Gabby took me to LFCC, my first ever convention. We went to London again, had a ball, met Glenn from Walking Dead, and Crowley from Supernatural! Later in the year we would also go back to London for MCM Comic-Con, which was more spectacle, but I preferred LFCC more, there were more famous people, and I’m a sucker for meeting the famous!
I saw Sum 41 again with my best friend, and we learned our lesson from the last concert, so we got seats up top, and watched from relative safety, and thank god for that because my hearing went to crap after that night! Gabby bought me tickets to go and see Nothing More again as well, and to show her my world a little more, I took her with me! God they know how to put on a show!
The year ended on the shitty side, and I was a pretty shitty boyfriend with this. But Gabby’s nan fell ill, and it wasn’t looking good, and when Gabby needed me after going to be with her mum at the end of the year, I wasn’t there. So I will be spending the rest of my life trying to make up for it. Sorry sweetheart.
2018-
A shit start to be honest. Gabby’s nan died, and it was a stressful time all round, Gabby and I had a massive argument, and I nearly drove her to self harm. Way to go Sam, you prick. I was convinced that after that, we would be over. Why would Gabby want to be with someone who drives her mental health into the dirt? So naturally I was surprised when she told me she still loved me, and still wanted to be with me, and when she moved back, and got a new job, I saw this as a chance to get things going back in the right direction, for the sake of us, and to show Gabby that I will always love her.
NOW FOR A BIG DRAMATIC CHANGE IN SAM’S LIFE. I quit McDonald’s. And looking back at it, thank fuck I did. I was gunning for another promotion, and I got so close to becoming a manager, only for it to be taken away. Yet another opportunity snatched by arseholes. So that was it, fuck ‘em. I quit, and thanks to Gabby finding it, I got a new job working in the same company as my dad, and I can safely say I have not regretted that decision. I love my new job to pieces!
Now, back to Gabby. AND YET ANOTHER DRAMATIC CHANGE IN SAM’S LIFE. In August, on Gabby’s birthday, I wanted to take her to the zoo, with her mum and nieces in tow. And that was the day I lost my girlfriend. AND GAINED A FIANCEÉ SEE WHAT I DID THERE TUMBLR? SUBVERT YOUR EXPECTATIONS OH YEAH. I proposed, and she said yes! I’m going to be a husband! I’m grateful for everything Gabby does, she teaches me so much, and sometimes doesn’t realise it, so to hear her say yes has to be the greatest thing she has done for me so far, because it shows that she wants to spend the rest of her life with an overweight, greying, eccentric, potty mouthed nerd.
I started learning to drive this year, because goddamn it, if I’m going to get somewhere with my life, I needed to drive, I needed a car. So I found a driving school, and got to work. Now it took me going to a different driving school to find out that my first instructor was just trying to bleed me for money, but I enjoyed the driving all the same. But when I had to find a new driving school, I saw that as an opportunity to procrastinate my arse off again. Well done Sam, well done. You prat.
2019-
I PASSED MY DRIVING TEST. After getting in with a new driving school, I got on really quickly, and passed first time, and in May, after Gabby passed her test as well, we got our first car. Moss, the (nearly) 18 year old Nissan Micra. He’s old, a bit clunky, but he’s an amazing car, and I couldn’t picture a better car for us to start with. Mainly because he’s small and really easy to park.
After getting my butt into gear, and sorting out some crap on my end, Gabby and I really got into planning our wedding, we set the date, and from there, we decided on venues, transport, Gabby chose a dress, everything was coming together in the planning phase. However, we didn’t anticipate that we would have already booked over ¾ of the wedding before the end of this year! Seriously, our wedding is in 2021, and we are practically done. WE BOOKED OUR HONEYMOON A FEW DAYS AGO FOR GOD’S SAKE. So yeah, 2020 may be a little less exciting!
Now for a little bit of a shitty part of 2019. I found out a friend of mine died, and that left me feeling down as hell. Of all the people, I never imagined my friend Jay would be one to go so soon. He was a massive character, big heart, and a bigger laugh to match. To hear him pass was frigging heartbreaking, and I don’t think I’ll stop visiting him anytime soon.
Do I know what the next decade holds for me? Not a clue, but I’m glad I’m not alone for it, with Gabby at my side, and our wedding not that far away, I’m ready to make her the happiest woman alive, to start the family that we both want (I mean, apparently we’ll have twins when we have kids, so that’s going to be fun!), to live the lives that we want to spend together. To spend time with friends, new, old, and really old. But most importantly, to have her for all of it.
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Hola everyone.
And welcome back to my blog and also with that to another week. I hope the last week and weekend have been great and that you’re doing good. First of all, I need to apologise for not posting anything that past week. I was quite busy the last few days – good busy, not bad busy, thank god – and could unfortunately never find the right time to actually sit down and write something, although ever since Saturday the 19th – the one two weeks ago – I’ve had one post fully planned out. This one you’re reading right now, to be exact. And it’s a special one, I can tell you that. Because today, and finally, I have the honour of telling you everything about the very beautiful, super mesmerizing and absolutely unbelievable Amber Run I had the chance to attend. It was incredible. I can’t wait for you to read this.
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Okay, so, first of all, the whole adventure started off with me – and buckle up for this – actually getting to interview these lovely guys from this incredible band. Joe, Henry and Tom. The fantastic trio. And ultimate reason for one of the most phenomenal days/evenings/nights of my entire life. I’m not gonna go into much detail about the whole interview, as all the gossip and stuff isn’t really my thing, but I do want to say that they were the nicest guys ever and that I still feel so incredibly honoured to have got the chance to meet them. I’ll definitely never ever forget it. And with that, it is also my pleasure to share the finished feature I wrote about our whole chat with you guys. So, if you want to check that out, please just click here and enjoy. Also, please don’t hesitate to tell me your thoughts if you do check it out. I appreciate any kind of feedback. Thank youuuu.
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So, yeah, that was kind of the first part of the absolute madness that was that day. And I had every intent to fully enjoy every second of it. After the super lovely interview, I then obviously had to stay at the venue – the Roundhouse in London – in order to get to the front for the gig. You might think now that it could be a bit weird to be there as a journalist at first and then end up at the front row for the gig, but, in all honesty, I had waited for that gig for a long time and besides that, I’m also short, so it’s either the front or seats for me. And in that case, it had to be the front. Which I actually managed to get – I mean, it was second row, but let’s not be that strict, right -, which I’m still kind of proud of. I know, I know, I was one of the first people to actually get to the venue, so where else would I be, but still. I’m still proud.
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After quite some time of waiting outside and then inside, which mainly consisted of me sitting on the pretty cold floor and fangirling about the interview with my friend, it was finally time for the support band – Stereo Honey – to come on stage and then, after them, Amber Run. I can’t even put into words how excited I was. Even after having spent quite some time with them chatting while being sat in a tiny room, it was still so incredible to see them on stage. Maybe also because it was my first time of seeing them live. Either way, if anyone ever looked professional and at ease with what they’re doing, it was definitely them. And I truly, truly laughed that. You know, whenever a band is on stage, playing live, and really shows and lets the crowd know that they are enjoying the moment just as much as the people attending the gig, the whole thing levels up by about a hundred for me. It just completely changes the overall dynamic in the room when the artists are as happy as the crowd. And that’s why it matters so much to me. I want the band or the artist to be happy. Just as happy as I am in that moment. And I think, on that particular Saturday, the whole room was definitely just one big heap of happiness (and maybe a bit of melancholic sadness in-between, depending on the song they were playing).
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Out of the whole one and a half hours, there were quite a few highlights, which I do have to talk about because I can’t help myself. The first one definitely has to be finally getting to hear ‘Amen’ and ‘I Found’ live. I cried during both of them. Both kinda broke my heart – ‘Amen’ a tad more simply because of its story and existence overall (or how Joe put it – peak emo). And both were an experience that I could only describe as heavenly and otherworldly. I mean, the whole gig in itself felt like a trip to heaven for a few reasons. For once, there’s Joe’s voice. If you don’t know it, please go and check it out now, because I simply have no words to describe how beautiful it is. Then there’s the fantastic band. And last but not least, there were the moments I will forever cherish when all three of them – Joe, Henry (their keyboardist) and Tom (their bassist) – sang together. I can’t even describe what their voices combined sounded like. Heaven. They sounded like heaven. And they made me feel like I was in heaven.
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Besides that, there was also this very cute moment when they started playing ‘What Could Be As Lonely’, which is one of my absolute favourites and also funnily enough one of theirs as well, and Henry, who was right in front of me, had this very fun moment of complete understanding and excitement. The story to that would be that we had discussed the song and at the end they had said that they would make sure to play the song. So, when they played it, Henry looked at me with that expression of “AHA! There you go.” and I just laughed at him and gave him two thumbs up. It was such a sweet moment, honestly. Actually having a real interaction with the band during the gig is literally one of the best things ever.
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And last but not least I have to mention the moment when all the crying on my behalf started, which was when they played Affection. I mean, this one has always had a special place in my heart as it was the first song I heard of their newest album, but what made it all even more incredible was that they actually had the singer of Stereo Honey come up on stage to perform the song with them. Have any of you guys ever had to cry because something was too beautiful to cope with it? Because that was exactly what happened to me while I was listening to them and watching them. It was just so damn beautiful. And wholesome. And cute. It was simply perfect.
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Actually, that’s what I would call the whole day/night overall. It was nothing short of perfection. As soon as the gig had ended, I fell in this kind of trance. It had really been this good. I felt like I was on a cloud or something. And I know this might sound super crazy now, but out of the over 170 artists I’ve seen live over the course of my whole life, that band and that gig definitely earned a spot in top 10. And that’s really saying something. I’m easily excited and interesting, but not like that. Amber Run did more than just excite and interest me. So much more.
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Also, absolute probs to their whole team and especially their stage and light designers, because, heck, what a show. I mean, just take a look at the pics down below. How beautiful does that look? With the colours and the sign and just everything. So pretty.
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So, overall, Saturday and that gig and Amber Run created something magical that I hadn’t experienced before that and I will forever be grateful for that and cherish every single moment. If any of you guys ever get the chance to see these incredible guys live, please please please do yourself a favour and go to the show. Even if you don’t know their music. Trust me, you’ll love them. And obviously, checking them out on Spotify is a must as well. And until then, I hope you enjoyed reading about this magical, heavenly day/night that I got to experience. I’m utterly happy that I got to share it with you and I can’t wait to hear all your opinions. As always, I wish you all an amazing week and, of course, thanks for reading. x
The Sounds of Heaven Hola everyone. And welcome back to my blog and also with that to another week. I hope the last week and weekend have been great and that you’re doing good.
#amber run#art#concert#concert review#happiness#heaven#henry wyeth#indie#indie music#interview#joe keogh#journalism#ldn magazine#life#lifestyle#live music#london#me#Music#music interview#myself#personal#Personal Space#philophobia#pictures#roundhouse#tom sperring#uni#work#writing
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