I’m just here trying to sleep after a long week (I know it’s only Wednesday but I am stressed and I wanted to quit my job on Monday so it’s a long week) and I’m thinking about Dustin’s birthday. Specifically his seventeenth. And maybe it’s not on the exact day, but around there, and it hits him out of nowhere
He’s the same age Steve was when a bunch of kids were shoved at him and he was told to keep them safe. He’s the same age Steve was when he almost died doing that multiple times on the same night. He’s the same age Steve was and he doesn’t think he’s even remotely prepared to handle a group of kids and doesn’t think he could have been brave enough to fight a bunch of demodogs or billy when he was spitting mad and then gotten up and gone into the tunnels afterwards.
And he looks at Steve now, more mellow, softer around the edges, with friends his own age and his bitching far more playful and affectionate with them, with his glasses and his failing hearing and sometimes anger because of those things but no regrets.
He looks at him and wants to cry because he doesn’t know how Steve did it. He doesn’t know how Steve was so brave and strong then when he was arguably still sort of an asshole and didn’t even know them aside from knowing who they were. Because that night was the first night they’d even spoken, but Steve had jumped right back in despite how they all knew he’d tried to pretend it never happened.
He looks at his brother and doesn’t understand how he’d so easily been there for them back then because trying to imagine himself in his place it just makes him feel overwhelming panic.
Because that’s when it hits
Steve was a kid too. He was just a kid, but he’d seemed like an adult to him, had carried himself with the confidence of adulthood even when Dustin knew now that it was bravado.
He thinks about the year before, when Steve had fought his first monster and been even younger. And maybe he wasn’t the youngest, that was Erica’s privilege, but he’d still been a kid and they’d all forgotten that because it was Steve, who took on the mantle of protector and carried it like a badge of honor even now.
And he hugs him, of course he does, and when they talk, they both cry a little, because Steve can finally admit how he’d felt back then, how he’d felt so out of his depth but didn’t want the kids to see his fear because he needed to be brave
Just lots of sappy thoughts about childhood and loss and moving on knowing that you were allowed to be scared when you thought you couldn’t
KAT YOU GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW. I'M SCREAMING AND CRYING! I'm gonna lose my MIND. I'm gonna climb the WALLS. I'm gonna FLY into the SUN! this is SO IMPORTANT to me now, I'm never going to not think about this, this is critical to their relationship now and I'm never going to see it any other way.
if you write it, I'll podfic it. I swear, this just flipped some switch in my brain, I'm obsessed.
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Who r your favorite rtumblr blogs I want more of u on my dash
sweats
I'm gonna @ as many people as I can think of, and any other rtumblrinas who see this can reblog it so our dear anon here can have the same posts on their dash as many times as possible /silly
@yournamekevi (posts)
@tsunesama (art)
@styx1an (art)
@fluffydancer618 (art/The Board)
@mareep-gaming (posts)
@miku-life-tips (posts)
@rumbleturnblr (pictures of rt)
@badlydrawnrtblr (art)
@strifesolution (art/writing/cool aus)
@sonicrainicorn (art/writing/cool aus)
@pieofdeath (writing/cool au)
@my-name-is-daniel-yes (daniel)
@wearethepioner (posts/he's just returned yippee)
@sugarsaltines (art/also just returned wahoo)
@noctilucous-blue (art)
@lubluues (art)
@amemesiella (art)
@ananinidraws (art/magical john)
@yinyangle (art/magical john)
@1dklikesthings (art/magical john)
@justtrashperson (art/cool aus)
@kieshartzishere (writing/art/cool aus)
@hearts4rtgame (art)
@dragonwolf3416 (posts/art)
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COMMISSIONS! FROM ME! YAY!
Status: Open!
okay, gonna start this with.. i have no idea how to make a comms info post. i was going to try and make a carrd but it's... a lot! so, under the cut, i'll have some examples and prices and some info on what to expect! (LONG POST) (YE BE WARNED)
Rules! (and some general info)
because we need that
Don't haggle with me. I'm not selling you old furniture, you're paying me for my time and effort.
For smaller commissions, I require pay up-front
Larger commissions (over $30) can be paid half up-front, and half later. For both ours' insurance!
I can do cashapp, zelle, or paypal.
Time taken on each piece will vary, of course, and I can give you an estimate when we hash out details. For pieces that take over 2 days, I can provide updates! Don't be afraid to check in whenever! I won't feel rushed or hassled if you just want to know how progress is :)
If you have literally ANY questions. ANY OF THEM. at all. just message me. Even if you're not sure if you want to commission, or don't intend to at the moment. Have a curiosity? My dms are open, friend. And my ask box too, if you'd rather. I'm so open to questions it's unbelievable. I am almost begging you to ask... If you have something to ask.
YAY / NAY / MAY(or, what i will and won't do)
YAY!
Furries
Humans
Roblox avatars/characters
Fandom
Oc
Light/medium mech
Ships (including selfship)
Suggestive
(Artistic) nudity
Multiple characters
Whatever's not on my "no" list! Please please just message me and ask if you're unsure. Even if you're not sure about commissioning and just want to see if it would be possible! I won't bite, I promise. :)
NAY!
Nsfw
Fetish (even if not explicit)
Heavy mech
Heavy gore
Anything proship/comship/whatever the hell they're calling it. NO KID DIDDLING! OR INCEST!
Anything vivziepop related. I don't like her or anything that she makes. (her absolute slop doesn't deserve to be drawn by my hands)
Celebrities (actors in a role, sure, but just the guy? the plain dude? just some guy on our earth who works a job? a real person with a life? no.)
MAY! (or, things I'm on the fence abt)
Horror
Minor gore
Large scenes (not my strongest skillset)
Whatever! I'm okay with stepping outside of my artistic comfort zone, so long as you're okay with the result varying in quality (and possibly taking longer, depending on what you ask for) Again, and I CANNOT say this enough, JUST ASK ME!!
WHAT I HAVE TO OFFER!
Okay, so, as shown here, for a standard commission i'll have 3 sizes, along with 4 stages of completion.
The stages are sketch, line art, flat colors, and render (shading/lighting)! sketch is the cheapest, and render is the most expensive. I'll list some prices for each size below :3
Head
Sketch - $5
Line art - $7
Colors - $10
Render - $15
Half
Sketch - $10
Line art - $15
Colors - $20
Render - $25
Full body
Sketch - $20
Line art - $25
Colors - $30
Render - $50
Add-ons!
Background (any commission automatically comes with a simple one, to be pictured in examples) - $15
Extra character - $7-$20 depending on what you're getting! just ask
COMPLEX object (like a weapon) (simpler ones r free) - $5-$10 (again, depending. just ask)
Anything that would take me more time and effort than usual, really. Time and effort is what you're paying for! I try to keep most of these pretty cheap, cus you're already paying for the drawing itself lol. Just ask if you're unsure.
Other kinds of stuff I'll do!
Icons! (or emojis, they're very similar)
These are basically just the head w/ colors, so $10
If you want an emoji set (or icon set, i guess?) it'll be +$5 for each additional one!
Reference sheets!
These are fun to make! They'll include 2/3 full-body shots of your character (front, side, and/or back), 1 head shot, flat colors, and some spaces for info! You can add in the info yourself, or have me add it in for you (no additional cost). They'll run you around $50 (however, you can add/take away stuff to change the price.)
Character page!
I will just. draw the character a bunch of times. $30 base price (sketch quality) can go up to $70 if you want them VERY spruced up (full render)
FINALLY. What we've all been waiting for... Examples!
These are rendered fullbodies! (with simplistic backgrounds, which are free!) (also, the first 2 are from 2022, so they don't look like how I would draw them today) (Last one is moff, @/sneablebeable 's character!)
these are rendered pieces w/ backgrounds! (though pokémon like these, I would consider chibi, making them a slightly lesser price.)
Reference sheets! Highly customizable, these are 2 I did for art fight last year :)
sketches! (with complex background, with extra character) For these, I can include basic values to help with composition. Will be done at my own discretion (no extra charge if I do).
Half body (in the style of a valentines card)
Icons!
Thanks for considering me! or... just checking this out! reading this far! whatever!
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I’m new here and I absolutely love your type of blogs with analysis and meta and long texts~~
I was wondering—is Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship the kind that could be interpreted as romantic?
first of all, welcome and ty! and sorry it took me so long to reply, i hope u're still around anon. now to answer ur question
i'll take this opportunity to share all my thoughts on the topic bc i have Many.
TLDR: it is possible to read it as romantic if you really want to, but it's not meant to (at least not as of right now in the story aka ch.224)
deep dive under the cut as to why
-> can Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship be interpreted as romantic?
i like how you phrased that bc, the thing is, interpretation is very subjective. you're welcome and allowed to interpret things however you want, but in EY&HJ's case, i feel like you'd have to work a lil extra hard to get to that point.
-> is Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship meant to be interpreted as romantic?
this one's easy bc no. objectively Not. the genre of No Home is drama and slice of life (and once upon a time, horror). even if they were to ever end up in a romantic relationship, that's not what the story is about.
when i ask myself what the author's intention is with this story, i'd say it's to (realistically) portray how a young person with trauma would navigate another young person's trauma. and showing how easy it is to unintentionally fuck it up for various reasons: lacking context as to what exactly said trauma is, generally not knowing how to navigate it, their own trauma getting in the way, lacking the necessary resources. take your pick.
think of it like "how should i carry someone else's baggage when i have my own to deal with?" while also keeping in mind they're kids; they often don't have enough experience to know how to help, and even when they know what the right thing to do is, they're not old enough to take (legal) action.
and especially, the most heart-breaking yet realistic thing, when you're just getting to know someone, you can't know everything about them. it's so easy to accidentally do or say sth that cuts or offends when it wasn't meant to. but when they've got their own issues, it's hard not to take it personally (eg. EY talking about HJ's parents without knowing his mom died not long ago in the beginning of the story).
-> what even is Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship??
this one's so funny bc i have no idea how to answer and i'm convinced not even EY and HJ themselves would know how to answer. they're not really friends; they got off on the wrong foot and kept walking with two left feet way too much to call themselves friends. the things that pushed them together the most were the dorms (not anymore) and the same friend group (more or less since EY has multiple).
what fits them best i'd say is "the universe forced us together against our will and now we're stuck with one another altho we hate each other" (<- at least in the beginning) extended with the "misery loves company" sentiment. finding comfort in someone who gets it, even tho they only kinda get it but not really but it works out anyway except it doesn't <- THERE'S NO NAME FOR THAT *cry* they invented a new type of character dynamic smh (i've never read a pairing with so much (romantic) potential only to see them completely fuck up their chance so royally by the end of their interaction EVERY SINGLE TIME. like yeah, enemies to lovers whatever BUT NOT TO THAT LEVEL HOLY SHIT)
they've changed each other, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. they're compatible in the way they understand each other on a deeper level and incompatible in the way they don't.
...however...
this is how HJ thinks of EY: (and also what No Home is truly abt)
and this is how EY feels about HJ after EY found out HJ used to steal as well (aka that HJ isn't perfect like the stuck up bitch EY thought he was at first):
so...
<- -> EY's first impression of HJ was that he was looking down on him and sth like "does this guy have ulterior motives? or is he just that naive being so trusting?" until EY found out HJ wasn't that different from him. after that, EY started admiring HJ for still managing to achieve things in life despite the hardships he had to go through. the type of admiration that can easily (and sometimes does) slip into envy.
-
since the beginning, EY has helped HJ (or at least tried to) without him knowing. sometimes it worked out, sometimes not. most times EY tried doing sth nice for HJ was (from EY's perspective) in return to HJ trying to help him or doing nice things for him (which, again, sometimes worked out, sometimes not). EY was just paying back a debt to "this stubborn naive guy who keeps getting into trouble and butting into his business. gotta look out for this idiot or he might get scammed." (<- eg. when EY offered to get HJ's money back from his uncle)
he doesn't do it for credit or friendship or out of obligation, he's just doing what he thinks is the right thing bc he doesn't want to owe anyone anything. he can't accept people just genuinely being kind, genuinely caring and genuinely wanting to help. but he's been learning and slowly coming to terms with it.
-
<- -> HJ first wanted to try befriending EY despite not liking him bc, well, the guy did steal his wallet and stab him in their first interaction. after trying and failing at it multiple times, thanksgiving happened, and HJ started thinking of EY as his underclassman bc he realized EY's just a kid with issues and he should keep an eye on him (discretely bc EY hates pity).
-
with time HJ has come to understand EY better by going after him whenever he ran off and slowly realized that EY does mean well and has his reasons (as fucked up as they might be sometimes). but his mentality abt EY is still "i gotta push him in the right direction cuz he's my underclassman and i unintentionally got attached to him (somehow??)" (also bc he knows EY already gave up on himself so he needs a lil help to find his way again. also also bc he knows EY is lowkey suicidal and he's scared it'll be his fault if sth happens) <- his care for EY comes from a protective/nurturing (/possibly maybe guilty) place which started when he realized EY was just a kid^^. in other words, HJ still bothers with EY out of a subconscious sense of responsibility/obligation in a way (a good way tho. or at least a way that gets better)
see, sth i struggle with is if HJ thinks he has to or wants to or thinks he should or can't just not help/care for EY. i can't exactly pinpoint where the sentiment is coming from. his face is too blank for me to read sometimes T_T
-
to summarize: HJ is EY's goal, what EY wishes he could've been. and EY is HJ's 'responsibility' so to speak (bc 'burden' doesn't quite fit since HJ is there for EY willingly) -> EY has a positive opinion of HJ while HJ has a neutral opinion of EY (which is also gradually getting better)
note1: i think HJ's intention (maybe subconsciously) was to be to EY what HJ's upperclassman was to him. aka someone who's there when you need it and can help guide you. it would explain why HJ kept chasing after EY despite not really having a reason to and EY repeatedly rejecting HJ's care/help.
note2: i also believe the 'upper-under-classman' relationship dynamic fits them the best atm bc it also matches the way the story often singles EY out as he's the only second year (aka younger) of the 6 MCs.
-> Romance in No Home?
another thing i should mention is that No Home rarely leaves things open for interpretation. the deepest arguments EY&HJ had were always spelled out for us, to make us understand exactly what the problem was, and how there isn't a good guy and a bad guy. it's just two people with issuesTM.
from what we've seen in the story up to this point, i couldn't pick out a moment where i'd go "here! that's romantic! that's the moment they realized SomeThing!" yk
when it comes to romance specifically, i feel like a handful of opportunities were missed. there are scenes which could've easily been written trough a rosy lens but simply weren't.
exhibit A:
HJ was speechless bc "wow this mf really is actively picking a fight with an authority figure. i gotta make sure things don't escalate" not bc "hoLY sHiT hE's PreTTy. all his fangirls are on to something". however, this only becomes more clear when you keep reading the next few chapters, so i understand how you could interpret it as the latter.
exhibit B:
here they got so close and the moment was so deep bc "woaa he said he believes me. no one's said to me that before!". unfortunately, EY was panicking too much for it to mean something bc of the guilt he felt for HJ trusting someone so undeserving of trust like EY.
exhibit C:
this is maybe the closest we got to romantic between these two. i think this might be the only (or at least first) ever deep interaction between them that didn't end in a fight or misunderstanding. is it meant to be romantic tho? -> ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
-> what do i think?
first, full transparency: i went into reading this story fully expecting it to be a BL and for EY&HJ to end up together. but the more i kept on reading, the more i got the ick thinking about them being in a (romantic) relationship bc, at least from what we've seen so far in the story, their relationship would be so ToxicTM (which i personally don't enjoy reading).
as they are right now, i wouldn't want them to be together like that. like, honestly, you still can't really consider these two even friends; they just tolerate each other if the stars align correctly (altho, i'll admit, their relationship is gradually getting better!!). every big argument they had i thought "god, there's no coming back from that. i'd cut ties so quickly if was them wtf". i still don't know how they managed to keep on interacting, props to them ig.
there's a lot of unresolved issues between them. and a lot of resentment which would not bode well in a romantic relationship. the smallest argument would turn explosive and they'd be, at best, in an on&off type of relationship. they both have the power to break the other and neither would be afraid to use it. they have a lot of history together, which is not always pleasant, so if they ever were to go the romantic route, it would have to be a long way to go.
technically, i could see them in a romantic relationship if they both went to therapy first and talked out all the baggage they're carrying (both individual and shared). realistically tho, what i think will happen at the end of No Home is that either they never cross paths again after high school ends (which would absolutely break my heart Wanan pls don't), or they somehow (unintentionally) end up living together bc they both desperately needed a roommate to pay rent (which would be a hilarious fucking gag LMAO). just, HJ going to uni/work and EY doing his own thing (prolly an actor) while still cohabiting together; hanging out to watch a movie before bed <- (whether platonic or romantic being left up for interpretation)
<- -> in conclusion, from what we've seen up to this point, their relationship is mainly upper-under-classman; reluctant (maybe) friends who tolerate each other but also care (too) deeply. they've changed each other, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. in some ways they're compatible and in others they're not.
all this being said, their relationship is improving and romance between EY&HJ is not impossible, just rather unlikely imo. but, again, interpretation is subjective and u're welcome to read their relationship however you want.
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