#he sacrifices his life for you and his son! how noble. his son takes over as Keeper. He's not as wise yet but he is powerful and SMART | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

attractthecrows · 1 month

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making myself moody by contemplating the clan Revallen left behind

#revallen lavellan #i almost don't want to consume any more DA bc if they've defined clan tillahnen then his backstory goes down the shitter entirely #me forgetting that this is not my IP: BUT WHAT IF THERE WAS A CLAN OF ENTIRELY SECRET KEEPERS #but they're soooo. they're so. imagine you have a very impressive Keeper. like he's wise and powerful and you're so proud of him #he sacrifices his life for you and his son! how noble. his son takes over as Keeper. He's not as wise yet but he is powerful and SMART #Your new Keeper grows into the job very well. You're proud of him! you love him! he loves you! he loves his clan!#he's married with a child. how sweet. it's nice to see him happy.#his wife dies. oh no. he is distraught #he's only responding to his child. the poor man! you and the rest of the clan give him space and try to make the best of it.#but you're all SO worried! you've never seen the Keeper in this state! even when his father died he still managed to lead. but not now.#you do everything you can to support him. you make sure he's fed. you keep people from bothering him while he's grieving. he's getting wors #and one night he just vanishes with his child #you can't abandon him! he's your Keeper! he's in no state to be traveling alone! what if he does something drastic???#but you never find him or his child. you search and search for months and can't find a trace of them. eventually you mourn.#several years down the line you hear rumors of a conclave. good! the mages and templars are threatening everyone.#the conclave exploded! sad but predictable. those silly humans.#the Herald of Andraste survived! okay sure. humans right?#no he's Dalish! huh how weird. anyways #Haven was attacked! Ah! our poor kinsman caught up in this. how sad to die amongst shemlen #he survived!#they've declared an Inquisition! the Inquisitor...#...IS YOUR KEEPER!!!#there he is!! he's alive!! he's in charge of the humans' Inquisition for some reason but HE'S ALIVE!!!!!#do you pick everything up and go to him? or have you moved on as well?#'we cannot go back to the way things were'#vs 'we never cared about the circumstances - we cared about YOU. so what if times have changed?'

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evilminji · 4 months

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You know all those Cults in Gotham?

Bet at least ONE of them could spring for both a Legit Magic User and a Cloning pod.

Because The Wayne's? Hearts of Gold. Long standing pains in the asses. Probably the only thing standing between this gods forsaken wasteland of a city and Their Dark Lord. For GENERATIONS no less!

It's sooooo obnoxious!

So they want to Curse Um dead. Just a good ol fashioned bloodline curse. Destroy um from within, etc. BUT! To do THAT? You kinda need a blood relative to sacrifice!

And Bruce is... well... rather infamously An Orphan With No Biological Kids (at that point).

So? What do you do? Make one, obviously. You send in some of your own on a Holy Mission. Honeypot that playboy! Get us a kid to sacrifice! Our God will reward you etc! But... FFS! What? Are brunettes not your TYPE or something?! Pretty lady! Throwing herself at you!!

TAKE THE BAIT!

But he DOESN'T. Because he's both really used to that behavior, as The Wayne Heir and a False Playboy, AND because? He's fuckin Batman. He can see through your schemes.

Okay.

Okay!

Plan B!

Get us some DNA. We'll CLONE the sucker. That should be doable, right?

........OH COME ON! How?!

Batman: [REDACTED] / Cultists: 0

Fuck it! This is impossible! How are we supposed too... *eyes drift over to the Wayne Family Private Graveyard* .......Idea? Ideeeeaaaa~! Someone get us a shovel!

So they, cultist bastards that they are? Fuckin rob a grave for some DNA.

OBVIOUSLY though, it can't be one of the more RECENT graves! He probably VISITS those! Watches them! No we gotta be SNEAKY! Get one a bit further back! Mwahahahaha! We're so brilliant! Our God is gonna give us SUCH a Good Grade in follower!

A thing that is both REAL and possible to achieve!

So, while a Weirdly FURIOUS Batman? Is just... VIOLENTLY breaking ALL of their bones? Cultist 17 is furiously digging like his life depends on it. Either somebody snitched or Batman was hunting them down! Either way?

Gotta! Get! That! DNA!!! *digs faster*

Ah HA! Got it!

Fucking SCATTER! Run you fools, RUN!!! *everyone bolts*

And AT LAST! They have it! Wayne DNA! Now? Pop that sucker into the machine and make us a baby! Too sacrifice! *relieved noises* Man, that was hard work you guys. But we DID it!

Except??

Theoretical Babies? And "Real, slowly forming in front of me and becoming a human child" type babies? VERY DIFFERENT psychologically. It's ONE thing to sacrifice a HYPOTHETICAL baby... but when you're the guy running and monitoring the Cloning machine? Watching it slowly form and come together into... into a CHILD?

You start asking questions of yourself. Of God.

Of what, EXACTLY, you are willing to do.

What lines you find yourself unwilling to cross.

And yeah, your life was SHIT before the cult. Yeah, you were alone. Adrift. Without purpose. Angry at the world for all of its ugliness and failings. But... sitting, alone, in a dark room? Nothing but the steady hum of machines and the cool light of that pod? You are left with nothing but time... and your thoughts.

And the baby.

The one... the one YOU made.

Almost... he's almost like a son, in a way. Your son. Floating there, innocent and unknowing. Destined to be born, only to die painfully, for a cause he could not even begin to understand. Because he's too young. Too small. Just... just a baby.

The baby YOU made.

Doubt seeps in like mist. Creeping into the cracks forming in your faith. Surely there's another way, right? Why not save up for a better magician? Or... or hire a hitman? Why involve a child? Surely... surely your God would not WANT this, right? Or if He did! Surely, he would want the boy to be able to CHOOSE, right? A noble sacrifice, for the cause?

The pressure builds. Batman is tearing the city APART looking for your fellow Believers. Leadership is pressuring you to get "It" ready all ready.

He's not an "it".

They are dismissing your questions. Threatening and posturing, as you grapple with your faith. Where? Where is the COMMUNITY that you joined? The camaraderie? Every day, Believers are being torn down. The faith has lost so many!

How can this be WORTH it?

Your faith is slowly, cruelly, strangled in your chest. A death, by ten thousand silences, and ten thousand more cruelties.

Your son is ready.

You do not tell them.

The Clone of Bruce Wayne's great-grandfather is small, but healthy, in your arms. A tiny warm body, with a strong beating little heart. You call the police. Leave your phone, call running, on the desk. No one thinks to stop you, as you calmly walk out the back door.

Why would they doubt?

You are Faithful.

You drive. Pray to a God you have lost faith in, beg forgiveness for what you do now. Your beat up old junker of a car makes decent time, as you leave Gotham. Your son, asleep in a carefully made nest of blankets, on the seat next to you. You drive. You keep driving.

Past towns.

Past cities.

Out of the state.

Stopping only to feed your son and fuel your car. You... you can not bring yourself to care about what will happen to you now. You know they will find you. Know this is the end. But something ancient burns in your chest. A caring you never thought was REAL.

You are afraid.

But you will not let them harm your son.

Finally, a town. Far from Gotham. Quite and cheerful. It calls to you.

Here. It... it has to be here.

You find the hospital. Tears choking you. There is a place to drop of children. You've seen them before. How strange, that now you stand before it and HURT. Your arms not listening to your command. You... you have to do this. You HAVE too.

He is just a baby.

He is your son.

You have to keep him safe. And... and that can not be with you.

You gently put your baby boy into the drop off. Press the buzzer. And then? You make yourself walk away.

Get back in your car, and drive. The gun in your glove box will insure they can never pry from you, what you have done. Where he is. He is safe now. He has to be. You... you did your job. As his father. You made sure he was safe.

You can barely see the road, through your tears.

You take your secrets to the grave.

And Danny? He grows up. Is adopted young and never knows different. Both a Fenton and a Wayne. Knowing only one of these, to be his. But... that Wayne? Was a damn fine man. A pillar of his community and a champion of the people.

Got tossed more then a few blessings, in his life.

They weren't the STRONGEST. But they added up. And more importantly? Were hardly the refined magics of the more powerful. They were cast onto "Him". By blood and bone, more often then not. Which was all well and good!

When there was only ONE of "Him".

Cloning technology did not exsist. So why would you word carefully against it? Danny becomes a VERY lucky boy. Survives many things he should not. In fact, the kindness and hard work of his original? Gifted back in magically powered well wishes? By this, he survives something NO ONE could possibly expect him too.

It saves his life.

His template would be quite pleased, knowing that. That his life of good deeds, saved the life of the child he never got a chance to meet. That it protected his children, from even beyond death.

And in Gotham? At long, long last. The program Bruce made in his helplessness and despair, to search EVERY child until the child made of his bloodline was found? Spits out a match.

A Watchtower engineer.

Daniel J. Fenton.

@hdgnj @hypewinter @lolottes @babbling-babull @nerdpoe @mutable-manifestation

#dpxdc #dp x dc #dc x dp #dcxdp #dc x dp prompt #danny phantom #that baby is my great grandpa! au #spice up the cloning au #minji's writing

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limpfisted · 8 months

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Something I think taken for granted for "good and heroic" characters like wyll is

How hard it is to be a hero in settings like this in gen. especially a solo hero.

And then u look at will especially at 17, especially after just losing half of your vision, and now being obligated to hunt devils for mizora, and not being able to tell people who you are or why you have magical powers

Wylls life has been extremely difficult.

Hes not "some rich boy." In fact, he tells you himself, he never really was. His father became grand Duke when he was 17. His father was a Duke before that, but his father was born to a poor blacksmith father and he was the youngest of six, so he worked his way up the ranks. Even as son of a Duke and grandduke---ulder was champion of the poorer "mythical middle class" lower city. All nobles and patriars are from the upper city. There's no way wyll wasn't looked down on by the upper city and then held to a certain untouchable standard as the flaming fist brat by the lower city/outer city people

And yet even at being some "rich boy" he excelled thru hard work and dedication, making things into a competition if nothing else, in which despite his Father's unsurpance to power, he still had PROOF he was the most charming, after all, he held the record for most sarabandes danced in a single evening, much to the exhaustion to the good lords and ladies of the courts.

But even so, with this "cushy life" (where he would get into trouble, mind you! Where his father would encourage him to get into fights, who would train him with a rapier, where he would drink in taverns in the lower city at 14 despite being "a noble rich boy" and hand deliver letters from his father to sharess's caress before he ever knew what went on with the pretty men and handsome ladies behind closed doors.)

Have you ever been camping, like experienced the holy shit, Outside of it all? I dont even like leaving the house without my phone. Wyll, 17, traveled all over the sword coast, with one eye, who knows how many supplies.

While wyll laughs off the trauma of it, losing an eye is a real ass disability that affects your motor skills. It can be difficult to do things like cut food at first, and it can take like 6 months WITH THERAPY for everything to feel "normal" again. Now imagine fending off goblins, and minotaurs, with no therapy, no physical therapy, no doctor. Having to navigate the cold of winter, cursed lands, mountains, all by yourself.

Having to learn to use you sword again, this time without your father. Remembering him every time you pick it up. Remembering the way he looked at you every time you face down a "devil." Spitting the words he would later say to you at them. They stink of avernus, they have brought ruin

Wyll dedicated his life to laboring for the people of the Sword Coast. It's not easy. He makes it look fun, because he's so proud of himself and happy to be helping people

But its actually hard and lonely. And it doesn't come easy, even to Wyll, I think. He had to train himself, it probably took him a long time to figure out what he was doing

I dont think wyll is really as inexperienced and naive as people think. Hes been to avernus, he's fought dragons and minotaurs. He's seen terrible things, he's STOPPED terrible things, and he's going to continue doing so, and choosing to do so, with the full knowledge of what that decision means, and the hard work and sacrifice it requires.

he's fully aware of who he is and what he's capable of, and he's extremely brave and strong and competent

Its good to be good for the sake of being good! And wyll does believe in fairy tales. But his dedication to the blade doesn't come because he's misinformed. Is he as experienced and powerful as he thinks he is? No, he's 24 LOL. But he's still done a lot! Has YOUR muse hunted devils thru avernus? Has ur muse even BEEN to avernus?

Wyll ravengard genuinely is improvising half the time---but more important than simply "being" good and wanting to do good----Wyll has the experience, practice and competence in serving a community to actually BETTER and protect communities.

In fandom spaces we often talk about how certain characters are "just so good" but we like. We forget about the effort it takes to actually commit to acts of doing good, the practice and perservance it takes to competently serve the community.

You can give the people the shirt off ur back but u run out of shirts eventually. Wyll has made himself an important resource on the Sword Coast for its safety. And I think we take that for granted bc its a genre staple, but like. He worked really hard. He dedicated himself to this.

He sold his soul, and he kept living and doing good anyway

#ooc #hc #in general i think fandom doesnt think about wyll as disabled #but it affected his life bro

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wordsinhaled · 1 year

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hope y'all are ready for another unhinged merlin post, friends

okay, because we always talk about how much merlin does to help and save arthur, and how drawn he is to him. but can we talk about how from the very beginning arthur has been indignant and ready to put himself in harm's way at the thought of harm coming to merlin??? i am at the beginning of my rewatch so i'm focusing mostly on the early eps, so -

in the THIRD episode, when merlin tries to turn himself in as a sorcerer - arthur (visibly distressed) covers for him immediately - not just because he thinks merlin couldn't possibly have magic, but because he knows merlin will be killed in gwen's stead

in the FOURTH episode - he'd rather drink from the poisoned chalice himself than have merlin drink it - an unheard of level of risk for someone to take for their manservant in camelot's society

like??? can we talk about how arthur's first thought the moment merlin is poisoned is, "sounds like fun, i'll brave a journey that'll put me in mortal peril for someone i've only known for a few months, at the longest"? can we talk about how he disobeys uther directly and sets out on his own, knowing that it could end to his own death? can we talk about how he and merlin are fucking psychically connected?

can we talk about how their interwoven destiny is known and used against both of them from the very beginning???

i want to talk too about uther's complete lack of understanding of how important merlin is to arthur. he just doesn't understand why arthur is so distressed, why he's willing to risk his life, why he's willing to sacrifice himself to save merlin. and arthur says it's because that's not the kind of king he would want to be. he says it's because he wants to be the kind of ruler who wouldn't discount a "mere" servant's life. he says that merlin saved his life, so of course he'd want to do the same for him. and of course, this is true - arthur is noble, and good-hearted, and he does the right thing even when it contravenes what his father would do or wants him to do

but like... there's the part where he genuinely cares for merlin, specifically - not just for a life debt owed, not just on the principle that a servant's life is equal to a lord's or a king's. merlin, specifically. it can be seen in the way he immediately rushes to protect merlin or to deflect attention away from him whenever merlin makes a scene in public at court that puts him at risk. in his visible worry when merlin drinks from the poisoned chalice. in the way he rushes to merlin's side after he collapses, and frets over him while gaius checks him over

and most of all (in this particular episode), it can be seen during the scene at the end - the scene shot over merlin's shoulder, where you see arthur entering gaius' chambers from behind merlin - and the relief that fills his face when he sees that merlin is up and eating, that's not prince arthur, or obnoxious lordling arthur; that's just arthur at his most genuine, with no posturing, when no one is paying attention to him. the way he takes a second before he schools himself to start up his usual banter with merlin, playing the taskmaster prince again, minimizing the risk he took for merlin's sake. but the way that persona falls again, and he tells merlin that he came to see if he was alright. tells merlin to get some rest

it's about merlin, specifically, and what he has come to mean to arthur. not just the life of any manservant, but merlin's life, merlin's importance to him

i also have a broader tangent about the relationship between uther and arthur & uther + homophobia, and how arthur's dynamic with merlin plays into it. "he's just a boy," uther tells morgana in this episode, and she counters, "have you seen your son lately?" and i think the trouble is uther has seen arthur lately, and he's not comfortable with what he sees. he doesn't understand arthur's closeness and attachment to merlin, and i'd argue that he's noticing his son's queerness and trying to stamp it out of him/trying to denial his way out of dealing with it directly. uther fits the mold of the toxically masculine/authoritarian father who sees the queerness in his child and responds by becoming even more cruelly authoritarian

as for arthur - arthur's been told since birth that he's crown prince, that he'll need to rule camelot, and produce his own heir to continue the line of camelot, and i would argue that arthur's need to prove himself, his bravado, his deep-seated need for his father's approval comes from the pressure also of knowing in his core that he doesn't measure up to what his father wants for him - he's kinder, yes, and more just - but also softer at heart, and queer in ways that aren't permitted for his time or station or for what he knows are his responsibilities as a future monarch. it comes to the fore whenever his connection to merlin hangs in the balance, when we're able to see arthur in unguarded moments when he can be his unadulterated self

i think we talk often about how merlin is drawn to arthur, and also i think it's very clear to see how merlin's magic is allegorical for queerness/closetedness, but my favorite to explore is how arthur gravitates towards merlin, and arthur's queerness, and it's especially apparent in these early episodes

and tl;dr basically merthur is WILD and i will never be normal about them even in the year of our lord 2023

#bbc merlin #merthur

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avisisisis · 3 months

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Something I love about Star Wars is how Luke didn't fix Anakin, he gave him the courage to save himself.

Anakin Skywalker is both a villain (and an abuser. I mean he tortured his own daughter and cut off his son's hand, come on) and a victim, that much is obvious. He is, most importantly, a slave. There has never been a single moment of his life where he wasn't/hasn't felt like he was a slave to something. Watto, the Republic, Palpatine, maybe even himself — you name it. He has never been free.

When Luke goes to the second Death Star, he is going to his father, to the suffering Palpatine is putting Anakin through (he is the main victim of Sidious's abuse and torture, something many people tend to forget). To the suffering Anakin is making himself go through, because, while it was heavily influenced by Palpatine, Anakin's choice to never leave was his own.

He Fell, and that wasn't his fault, but he chose to stay there. Many people — namely Padmé — gave him second chances. Padmé gave Anakin the chance to leave and stay together, but he didn't take it. He did all of it to save her, and it the end, he ends up believing he was the one who killed her (he 'destroys' his goal, because that's what the Dark Side does. You may begin as a noble person looking to save someone, but the Dark Side isn't good, and you will lose track of yourself along the way.)

And now here he is, inside a prison that is seen as his own suit. A prison he was put in, a prison he chose to stay in. By the time of ROTJ, he truly believes that it's over for him. That nothing can save him. That there's no hope. Anakin, the lifelong slave, is resigned to his fate. “It is too late for me, son,” he tells Luke, who willingly came to him wearing shackles.

And Luke, still believing that there is some humanity in Darth Vader's armor, doesn't deter. He doesn't let his father's words stop him. He shows that he's willing to give himself away, to die, just to save him.

Luke Skywalker, son of Padmé and Anakin and the last Jedi Master left, shows a man turned monster that he loves him unconditionally. He shows him that no, it's not too late for him, not now and not ever. And this — his selflessness, his compassion — is what finally gets through Anakin. Someone loves him, and he loves them back. And he would do anything to keep them alive, including killing his own Master and breaking his chains.

It's Luke's own sacrifice that inspires Anakin to give up his life. It's Luke's undying hope that motivates Anakin to finally break his own chains. It's Luke's trust in him that gives Anakin the courage to save himself, and in that single act, he saves the entire galaxy.

The light comes to him in the form of one Luke Skywalker, extending his hand for the last time — the light comes to him when he takes it.

The Prophecy is fulfilled when Anakin kills Palpatine and leaves the dark. The galaxy is saved when a father dies for his son.

#star wars #original trilogy #sw ot #anakin skywalker #darth vader #luke skywalker #emperor palpatine #chancellor palpatine #darth sidious #sw meta #star wars meta #i think that's what it's called?? idk #tw slavery #just in case :)#avis' post #anakin is freed in death and i will forever be sad about it #luke deserved to grow up with his parents :(( anakin you took everything from us #w ur stupid ass choices and bad decisions

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merrysithmas · 2 years

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masculinity in star wars

you know, after some great posts by the brilliant @intermundia my mind has been going. something i've long thought, and something they recently put into very beautiful words, is how one of the central themes of star wars, and why so many nonbinary/queer/trans/masc people gravitate towards it, is masculinity.

i'd even argue it is THE central theme (even beyond the concepts of Spiritual Balance & Good vs Evil), which explains the phenomenon of cismen being so violently gatekeeping and protective of it.

we all know when sw was released in the 70s the emotional arc at its core revolved around the concept of Father and Son, the forgiveness, redemption, or blame therein.

it is easy to see why Luke Skywalker, noble, innocent, and nontoxically pursuing a masculine concept of "knightship" (while retaining feminine qualities himself which would prohibit him from fitting in with the imperials) would become a hero to many young cis boys who had overbearing, unrelatable, absent, or downright evil fathers. it is easy to see why obiwan, the wise and protective second-father figure would become their beloved guru.

it is also easy to see, of course, the reverse, wherein many men who feel they failed at fatherhood, partnership, and life, would relate to Vader and the salvaging love he had for his son. the possibility that they were not totally consumed and digested by the toxic masculinity that had conscripted them and of which they then became soldiers of - an Empire.

the question SW asks in almost every film to this date is - what is masculinity? where does it come from? how do we define it? what do we do with it? and how do we balance it?

we see this reflected over and over again - Din Djarin with Grogu, the Bad Batch with Omega, Palpatine/Qui gon with Anakin, Obi-wan with the Skywalker twins, Rey's unrelenting search for a father figure in Luke, Kylo Ren and his burning abandonment in front of the absent Han Solo, Yoda and his Order, Cassian Andor and the powerless castration he experiences via the Empire, the HyperMasculine Empire, the warsome Mandalore vs. the pacifist Satine Kryze, Cal Kestis & his success borne of his crew of resourceful women.

Characters who are presented as male are constantly being challenged by ideas of masculinity and by which route they will choose to express it.

what does it mean to be a "man"? a question queer, trans, and masc people often ask themselves in relation to our identities. and a question we see the SW characters face constantly. is it sacrifice (Anakin)? protectiveness (Din)? bravery (Luke)? resilience (Obi-wan)? taking up arms when you are wronged (Cassian)? vengeance and blazing your own way (Vader)? Kindness and vulnerability (Cal)?

of course, this concept of masculinity in SW as a central theme also extends to its female characters and what it means to have female masculinity of any kind especially within a patriarchy or a situation where masculinity can be translated into a threat (to anyone, including oneself). this is another reason, id argue, for uproar in the cismale sector of the fandom when they are faced with a topic (female & queer masculinity) that they neither experience nor understand and see therefore, as a threat.

characters like leia, rey, jyn, reva all display various components of outright female masculinity and/or display a picture of women grappling with the masculinity around them, which i would postulate is what makes them so iconically and instantly popular. they are allowed to be whole on screen. they are not merely a "feminine" archetype. they are whole - masculine, feminine, passive, and aggressive.

Leia with her commanding military presence is never once questioned. She then becomes a mother who grapples with the duties of traditional motherhood while following a path that is most meaningful for her (the Rebellion).

Jyn, the abandoned streetrat rebel who is allowed to be callous, doubtful, unpreened, and cynical. Whose strength of heart eventually pulls a motley crew together.

Rey, a sexless scrapper whose skills come from self-reliance, who is pushed face to face with someone who repulses her - Kylo Ren with his burning crucifix of a saber, who haughtily croons to her that he can take "whatever he wants" from her. She pushes him away, rejects him continually, until he renounces the toxicity of his confused perspective (brought on by his own torture). Only to in the end embrace Ben, the good man who'd die for her to live: as she embodied the principles that he failed.

Reva, a hardened and traumatized covert soldier who gives in and then climbs out of the charybdis of vengeance and spiritual suffering. who mistrusts and is disgusted by the men who were supposed to protect her family (Obi-wan and Anakin). we rarely get to see this rage and pain from a female character on screen.

as queer people of course we see ourselves in between those philosophical questions and identify with various characters and their struggles. we are always presented with these internal questions of what makes an identity and confronted with our own society's labels of "masculine" and "feminine" and how they relate to our place as queer people.

& of course, "canon" doesn't truly exist in the sense of a character's gender or sexuality - a character's orientation and identity is up to the viewer- and with complex questions of identity already at play in this universe it is easy to see oneself as a queer person within this story.

and then of course, we are now starting to see characters like Merrin, Obi-wan, and others' sexualities expanded upon further than the "assumed cishet" brand usually defaulted by the general audience.

so those are some futher, not-totally developed thoughts on the topic here haha

#just thoughts #star wars #sw meta #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #luke skywalker #leia organa #din djarin #cassian andor #cal kestis #rey skywalker #reva sevander #jyn erso #han solo #kylo ren

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courtofthrones · 1 year

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Pairing:Eris Vanserra x reader

Summary:What happens when two people who are the opposite ends of a thread of fate try to get the other end of the thread to burn knowing they would burn too. Because he was the throne but she will see the throne burn.

A/N: reblogs and feedback are always appreciated. Do let me know of any mistakes. Thank you for reading.

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Stage II:CHOICES OF A DEAD MAN

Despite your unwillingness you found yourself back in the great hall, back in your seat near your parents who did not seem happy about your momentary escape but before they could chastise you about your supposed insolence the High Lord clinked a golden spoon on his glass settling the room into silence.

"My subjects, it has been such a long time since we all gathered to enjoy our much earned celebration after all the hardwork in the previous wars" he bellowed into the hall with his usual air of entitlement.

You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his words. Hardwork in the war? More like enjoying the benefits from the misery of the less fortunate.

"So as your High Lord and as a father I am very elated to announce the betrothal of my eldest son and heir Eris Vanserra."

Giggles and excited shrieks erupted the air as noble ladies from all over the room for they were a step closer to becoming the princess of autumn court.

You could not be more indifferent to the matter if not furious for Eris Vanserra was the unfortunate and biggest contributor in the death of your brother and along with the downfall of your family.

But your attention was stolen by the high table as Beron beckoned his eldest son forward to the eyes of many. And a shiver ran down your spine as your eyes caught on to the red hair and smug smirk that had you mesmerized in the garden.

Rage and unexplainable sadness was all you could feel.

Parents moved closer to their daughters who were brought up their whole lives preparing for this single moment. You watched as in front of you Lady Alena's mother started fixing her daughter's dress. Lady Alena was from one of the oldest families of the court and the rumours were that she and Eris Vanserra have been quite close to each other .They claimed that Lady Alena’s beauty was unparalleled in the whole of Pyrthian. You'd wager all your gold on her if there was a bet on who was most likely bethroed to Eris.

But you could not help but feel pity for her. How couldn't you? She was to spend rest of her long fae life with someone as cruel and miserable as Eris Vanserra. A man who abandoned his previous bethroed to die on the borders just because she was not "pure" enough for him.

" The virtuous lady deserving of such honour is... " Beron let his words hang over the room for a minute.

Since the moment you had arrived you had one question on your mind. Why the sudden welcome of your family in the court after years of shunning you. But the next words from the high lord's mouth put all your questions to waste.

"Lady Y/n of the Family Tarsa"

The breathlessness you felt earlier was back with a renewed vigour. You turned to look at your parents and they looked like they expected this to happen. Proud even.

Betrayal.

"No" "No,you cannot make me do this" was all you could say as a sentry approached to take you near Eris and ultimately your doom.

"My dear calm down, this is for the best and your futur-"

"My future? or your greed ."

You could feel everyone's eyes on you as if asking why her? Her family is ruined right? Her brother was a traitor wasn't he?

But more than the questions, it was your parents’ betrayal that pained you the most.

"You would not have agreed if we told you" was all you got from your mother as she tried to calm you down.

You picked your skirts to escape because you would never bring shame on Elias' name, his sacrifice but your father's painful grip on your arm halted you on your track.

"Are you so weak that you would run at the first sight of things not going your way? "

" I am not weak" you gritted out.

"Yes you are and our family is suffering because of it. Sometimes I wish it was you who turned to ashes instead of Elias" your father yelled loud enough for everyone to avert their eyes from the scene.

And your mother was at his side soothing him as if he was the one who was hurt.

And the painful part was that you agreed with your father's words. You had wished upon every star that why Elias had to go for the likes of you .You recalled how the ladies avoided your mother as if she was some filth from the slums, how your father's trade lost all it had. Of how not one male thought you were worthy of even a small conversation. And how the ladies your age were ushered away by their mothers from you. Of how everyone would be happier if it was you who burned at the stake instead of your brother.

--

"Would you ever have an arranged marriage Elias?" you asked your brother as you cooled down from your sparring.

Elias chuckled as he ruffled your hair "What's with the sudden musings y/n?"

"Well my priestess said that it is an honour to marry someone your family has chosen."

"Is that so? But to answer your question yes dear sister I would because it is my duty and it is expected of me."

"But wouldn't you like to meet your mate and have love as beautiful as mother and father's?" was the question you let out because you could not believe the utter stupidity coming from your brother's mouth.

"What mother and father have is as rare as you beating me in horse riding" teased your brother."And you will know that when you are older"

"I will have you know I am going to be seventeen next month so be careful when calling me young"

Your brother let out a loud laugh at your angry words but then continued his earlier words.

"Listen y/n sometimes we have to choose between ourselves and family, and I would always choose family so that you can always choose yourself " came Elias's caring reply as always.

"Elias! " came a shout from near the gates.

"Looks like one of your choices is here brother." you said giggling as you ran back into the house .

You were pulled out of your thoughts with a sharp pain in your arm from your your father.

Was this what your brother would have done for the family? For you?Was getting married to the murderers of your brother truly your only choice?

Holding your head with your hands you released a strangled breath.

Arranged marriage. To the destroyer of your family.

You felt sick.

Felt like you could vomit whatever little food you had consumed all over the shiny marble floors as your father handed you off to the sentry taking you to your hell on earth.

As you walked towards the high family with all eyes on you, your eyes met Eris Vanserra's cold ones despite fire swirling beneath them, so different from earlier under the moonlight and you felt a sliver of cruel satisfaction when you realised that you weren't the only unhappy individual in this wretched arrangement.

Part 3

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forgottencillian · 3 months

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The Ancient Arms of Ormond

in which i headcanon spam at you once again -- lmk what you think!!

Fox: defensive wisdom, ingenuity, wit; intelligence, refusal to be captured

White hart: the continual pursuit of life/good, purity of desire, worthy rule, peace and harmony, one who will not fight unless provoked, the wonder of magic, the mystery of forests, (with antlers:) strength and fortitude

Stag who bears the sun: life, rebirth, resurrection, hope in life after death; leader; tree of life; visionary; hunt for the sun; power; the irresistable tempt to chase, compellingly attractive; sunset and dawn; lightbringer/lightbearer; sacrifice and transcendence

Crescent/moon: one who has been honored by the sovereign; hope of greater glory; service in holy war; mark of the second son; serene power over mundane actions; serenity

Sun in splendour: glory and splendour, fountain of life

Azure (blue): truth and loyalty

Vert (green): hope, joy, loyalty in love

Tawny or Tenné (orange/brown): worthy ambition

Argent (silver/white): peace and sincerity

Or (gold/yellow): generoristy, elevation of mind

A brief history of the House of Ormond

the last two members of the house of ormond, an ancient and honored house of astaira, perished upon the fields of malconaire

these two were uncle and nephew who, themselves, had a rather tumultuous relationship. the nephew -- who also happened to have been named cillian -- was the son of the late lord eoghan ormond who had died -- apparently choking to death at a feast -- when he was a child of all but five, making eoghan's younger brother, ruairi, the de facto lord until such time as cillian came of age

rumor spread that eoghan's death had not been honest but had, in fact, been a poisoning perpetrated by the ambitious and fearsome eoghan, but how true any of this is cannot with any certainty be said, yet the rumors have persisted and some -- perhaps influenced by a popular astairan legend, or else by the horrid truth -- continued to claim that, even as ruairi brought up his nephew, he continued to plot his downfall

whatever the case, both men are said to have lost their lives at the battle of malconaire -- though a rumor persists that cillian ormond did, in fact, survive the battle, and there are those who even claim to have seen him at such high-profile events as the recent ball in celebration of princess guinevere's feast day, while others claim he was not there at all

indeed, in the last two years, many rather wild tales have surfaced all of which seem to center around the mysterious cillian ormond and his rather tumultuous life, but as many of these actually contradict, it is difficult to parse fact from fiction -- or if he is, indeed, even alive at all

whatever the case of this may be, the ormonds claim a long and storied history

like many ancient clans, house ormond can trace its roots back to multiple noble families which have since evanesced in all but the form of the ormonds whose last vestige are, themselves, in fact a cadet house of the original ormond family, tracing their line back to a second son of the original ormond branch, all of which accounts for the present house's many charges

it is said that, in ancient times, the original ormond was a young hunter living in a part of astaira the gods had, in their wrath, blighted with endless snow. crops would not grow, and the animals they might have hunted, perished. caught in the depths of winter without anything to eat, the people of his village were dying. around midnight one evening, it is told, ormond -- for this was his name -- was awakened by a blazing light. when he looked up, he found that the sun, itself, hung within the antlers of a white hart, beckoned him forward. all night, ormond followed the white hart, but as dawn came on, the creature darted forward away from him, taking the sun with it. as ormond raced forward, he watched the white hart die and the sun rise back into the sky. hungry as he was, ormond could not bear to desecrate the magnificent beast and, instead, buried it with dignity and respect. yet, when he dried his eyes, ormond looked around himself and realized that he had come to a place all of lush green. returning to his village, he led the starving people to the green place and, thus, they survived, and ormond was hailed as their leader, taking the creature who had led him for his badge.

many centuries later, kieran ormond, his father's second son, wed tiarna firceall (herself also a second child, her family having all tragically died of the pox the summer previous), the last firceall, whose badge was the too-clever fox, and whose house was a knighted vassal house to the lords of malconaire. together, the lovers merged their lands, powers, and crests, ruling jointly over land partially belonging to the lords ormond and the lords malconaire

about two hundred years later, the last daughter of the main ormond branch died, unwed, leaving all her titles and powers and possessions to her distant cousins, themselves descended from kieran and tiarna

as a result, the ormonds were in the strange position of being at once equal to the lords of malconaire as well as their vassal lords

because of this, they were undeniably lord malconaire's most powerful bannermen, but there was a great deal of uncertainty as to whether or not they would answer the late lord malconaire's call to banners when he went to fight the varmonts at the battle of malconaire (particularly given the tension between ruairi and cillian), but both lordly claimants to the title of lord of ormond joined forces and rode to their deaths to help save their country (ride of the rohirrim style) and, though the day was lost, whatever the character of the late ruairi ormond may have been, he is and his nephew alike are both viewed with honor by most loyal astairans as, whatever their differences, in the end they put them aise to do what they believed was right

----

hex codes: blue (000033), green (004B57), orange (A35123)

#ooc #about #image #cillian ormond: the anastacia of astaira

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bougiebutchbitch · 2 years

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Just saw your post about Kakashi secretly resenting Gai for sacrificing himself in the 4th war. If I may throw an idea your way (because I adore your kakagai content!):

Maybe you've addressed this arc in the past before and i haven't seen it but. I actually think a similar conflict would've come up much earlier in the series- namely when Gai vowed to kill himself if Lee died from surgery during the chunin exams.

It's been awhile since I've watched so I can't remember if Kakashi was even aware of Gai making this vow in the first place. But if he knew about it...

Wow. WOW. Imagine how freaking betrayed Kakashi must've felt, having Gai practically force himself into Kakashi's life throughout their adolescent years. To have opened his heart to another person despite the endless losses he'd suffered only for Gai to (potentially) throw his life away. Not in battle as a shinobi, not to save a comrade.. just. To honour his student. And this is not even touching upon the potential parallels that can be drawn between Gai and Sakumo in this scenario.... big yikes.

I think it would've been an absolutely HUGE turning point in their relationship. I'd really love to hear any additional thoughts you might have on it, if you're interested. No pressure to respond though, haha. :)

OW!!!!!!!!!!!! OW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you, I needed to cry today.

First up - you are 1000% correct. Gai's plan to commit suicide if Lee dies... buddy, that's not okay. I know he and Lee are supposed to be like... this jokey exaggerated spoof of dedicated Master & Student who are way too fired-up and passionate about everything, but c'mon, holy shit.

Gai has such an interesting relationship with self-sacrifice as a form of nobility and mAsCuLiNiTy and devotion - whereas for Kakashi, anyone else's self-sacrifice is a source of trauma and horror. But his own? He's more than willing. He's still wayyyyyyyyy too eager for die for others, even at the start of Naruto and throughout Shippuden.

Yet there's something numb about his sacrifices. From pleading with the kids to run away and leave him at Zabuza's mercy, to his literal death in the Pain arc, to him throwing himself in front of Sasuke to take Kaguya's attack without any hesitation... It's not big and dramatic and showy. It's in-the-moment choices, quick and decisive. I get the sense he's almost always ready to die for someone else - perhaps as an immensely fucked-up way of assuaging his own survivor's guilt, or because he still genuinely sees himself as someone who has inherently less human worth than everyone around him.

In contrast, Gai greatly idolises his father, to an unhealthy degree when it comes to following in his footsteps. For him, the ultimate display of love is dying for someone else - a philosophy that is equally as fucked up, in its own unique way.

But when we consider Kakashi and Gai's differing yet similar relationships to the concept of suicide and sacrifice... Isn't that what it all boils down to? Their fathers?

You have Sakumo, whose son found him slumped over, drenched in blood and moonlight, slain by his own hands because he couldn't face living anymore. And Dai, who went out in a brilliant conflagration, saving his son and proving all those who looked down on him wrong.

Doesn't that pose some interesting questions?

Is there ever a 'good' way to die? Is any form of suicide inherently less tragic, more noble? Or are they all just as messed up as each other?

Maybe it doesn't matter. After all, those are questions that can only be answered by the people left behind.

But I like the idea that out of those people left behind... Gai sees a difference there. Kakashi doesn't.

Which is to say: I cannot imagine Kakashi ever being cool with Gai offing himself if Lee hadn't survived his operation. I think he'd be pretty fucking worried about Gai - and even more so when he reaises Gai isn't suffering with depression or self-loathing or a lack of self-worth (all of which Kakashi is intimately familiar with, and could empathise with and understand). He just... thinks suicide is an ay-okay way of showing your love for someone. And that uncorks a whole barrel of trauma for Kakashi to deal with.

Did Gai not want him to kill himself, when he was in ANBU? Or did he just not want Kakashi to kill himself without a 'good purpose'?

I want Kakashi to ask that point-blank to Gai's face - and, perhaps, for that to be the point that makes Gai question his own convictions about what entails an acceptable reason to die.

#kakagai #gaikaka #kakashi #maito gai #might guy #hatake kakashi #just to say: I don't there are CORRECT answers to the question of When Self-Sacrifice Is Good #that's what makes it an interesting question #self harm #suicide #not trying to make any statements about suicide being positive or negative here #just prodding at concepts

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maigo-san · 1 year

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me: selling you a meta about how the Rengokus and Kamados are more connected than you think and how they, who are Yoriichi's closest friends and found family and are the only ones that pass the knowledge regarding Hinokami Kagura/Hino Kokyuu but seeing as two very different things (a dance vs a weapon) is an allegory to Yoriichi's inner turmoil, how despite hinted as the so-called Fire God, the Kamados' ancestral memory of him is of a tragic lonely, hard-working guy while the Rengokus who despite his comrade and the only other loyal hashira to defend him even after they found out koku turned into a demon, wrote him in their records as this godly legend who they will never find again because he's the originator, the Chosen One. Maybe there's a poetic justice behind Rengoku failing to catch the demon he's hunting to find Yoriichi's family dead already, meaning what they both seek are different, and despite how noble and virtuous it is, Yoriichi can never fulfill that, not alone at least, not taking all the responsibility himself

Sumiyoshi symbolizes his inner self, he longed for the quiet life like Sumiyoshi and Suyako's family, and he longed to hold his own baby, but he can only help them, accompany them, talk to them, have tea with them because he knows he's fated to not live a normal life unless Muzan is dead. On the other hand, Rengoku symbolizes the corps, he symbolizes the war, he symbolizes the self-sacrifice Yoriichi had to make to do what he's meant to do, for the sake of atoning his so-called failures and that is why I feel generally speaking, Yoriichi won't hide the Kamados from Rengoku's knowledge but him leaving the earrings to Sumiyoshi and walking away never to be known or seen is a way for him to say that if they are fated to meet then they will. If the war is over then Yoriichi's inner turmoil is over!

and I swear I'm not pushing anything but it's just so interesting seeing the many coincidences. The Kamados hold the knowledge of the whole twelve moves while the Rengokus hold the knowledge that there is a secret thirteenth move and it's just so ackkkk, like the hints are there and the ending is like that and you can't help but dig deep into it okay

also me: yo what if yoriichi met hikomomo and he'll be like...

"Sumire, look how big you've gotten," and

"Are you perhaps Rengoku's son?"

and "How did you two meet?"

and hikomomos are just like ...

he's gonna be so happy because wow, Rengoku joined the quiet life gang? lol no seriously just imagine him and Uta and their kid invited to the two families open houses. My heart 😭😭

#tw spoilers #I love them so much

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pinkumiilku · 2 years

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Sanji’s trauma is represented in a phenomenal way, unlike anything I’ve seen before in comics.

Taking the specific case of emotional abuse, over the concept of failure, turning into the unwilling outcast, who had no idea any world existed beyond what they told him. A child who was never allowed to bloom, show any interests, left to feel as though he must be evil or profoundly sick, over failing within that reality.

Having to create multiple facets, “versions” of himself, simply to appease the looming wrath of abandonment, and within that downward spiral, developing an implied eating disorder, needing some, any, form of control.

This not only created a selfless identity, but one easily sacrificed, at first in what seemed to be “noble causes”, later revealing Sanji’s insecurity, and lack of compassion towards himself.

Failed by family, adults and children alike, for the core reason of not being able to meet expectations, leading to endless cycles, unable to reach out to a single person.

Being locked underground, in a mask, is a fantastic metaphor for abusive families, denying the existence of failure, the failure they created, keeping him around either out of guilt, or fear. They understand Sanji’s wrath, and fear the consequences, if he would ever to be let out into the world they denied him.

Even as a child, Sanji understands leaving is the only option, because nothing he ever did or will ever accomplish, will be good enough, that still being his main concern.

You don’t need to fear revenge from a child with no sense of self, hence why he is allowed to go.

And it was at this point that meeting Zeff, his “Grandfather” figure, with a completely different set of values from his family, who instantly rescues him because he is a child, and he is important, will be the key to Sanji’s “salvation”.

Starving on a stranded island, is a metaphor that will be repeated throughout his story. One where he is given the choice to live or die, and one where his untold suffering takes the form of a life threatening illness, and the “ease”, with which he confronts it.

Zeff is what shattered any prior belief he had about the world, in his own rude and drastic way, and validates Sanji’s pain and his dreams, right off the bat, and sees just how hollow of a child he is, willing to sacrifice his own leg to save him, despite having just met.

Teaching him about his interest, or metaphorically, how to manage his need for control, and redirecting it into something useful, starving to cooking, and teaching him that all those expectations he was put under, did not matter as long as he is a good person.

When Sanji leaves to join the pirates, there is a stark contrast within having been forced as a child to run away, and then being encouraged to leave by his new family, because he deserves to live and see the world.

“Don’t ever tell anyone I am your father, it’s a shame I don’t want anyone to know,” spoken by his biological Father, becomes: “Don’t catch a cold!” spoken by his adoptive, or true Father. Suddenly, Sanji kneeling in front of him on the floor, and sobbing while thanking him, makes a lot more sense given the right context.

Despite Sanji’s growth, once the opportunity to make his family proud shows itself again, he is dragged back right where he started. This time disgusted, and distant, understanding for the last time, he was only ever useful as a tool, and never as a person, as a son, a sibling or a man. This is where we truly understand the extent of his abuse through stuttering, jittering movements, chain smoking bad even for his standards, the pain in his expressions in each panel, the instant surrender, and seemingly forgotten growth, willing to sacrifice himself, abandoning his crew, and acting differently.

This is where his captain’s starvation is perfectly done. Refusing to eat anything other than what he cooks, until Sanji joins them again. This is as demonstration, showing first hand what his suffering looked like, and how irrational and cruel he was being towards himself, in this case food being a metaphor for love. This somehow works, and he brings him something to eat, though purposefully gross to encourage his captain to leave, and with that, understanding his worth a bit better.

He could have left again, but the threat his biological family was headed towards made it impossible for him to turn his back on them. Because, despite it all, despite the agony he’d gone through, he loves them still. And ultimately ends up saving their lives.

Once that was done, where we could have expected a sort of emotional reunion to take place, forgiveness, an apology, Sanji through gritted teeth and a panic attack, forces his Father to kneel, and does not forgive him. He demands never to be contacted by them again, and they comply.

Oda was giving us a clear message. Sanji’s story is that of many, too many children. Too many survivors, who end up taking their own life, who have no sense of self, who love their families despite not forgiving them.

He was saved by kindness, and kindness alone, which is his main character trait, feeding anyone who is hungry, or taking care of children, acting as the backbone for his crew.

Oda talked about something that is not talked about, and he did it phenomenally well.

#sanji #long post #one piece #vinsmoke sanji #character analysis #starcloud rants #starcloud posts #trigger warning

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fuckyouozai · 1 year

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the search was bad, full stop. but i keep thinking of the inherent violence in the flashback where ozai grabs ursa’s hand and says of COURSE he’s my son! you IDIOT! the violence is there on the page but as is the clear implication that every single thing ursa has does in the fire nation royal family household has been against her will, including conceiving and bearing her two children. of COURSE he’s my son! it just underlines the violence in how zuko and azula came into this world, and the total and complete control that ozai had over ursa. then weirdly the story bends over backwards to say that ozai being abusive towards zuko is somewhat related to ursa’s reaction here ( “wishful thinking” and ozai saying fine then i’ll treat him like he isn’t my son since that’s his mother’s wish) when it fact it has just demonstrated more clearly than anything else (barring the flashback in the storm) that ozai IS abusive to his own family.

i remember when the search came out and people were being so horrible to ursa for choosing to forget her children so even tho it’s a SHITTY STORY!!!!! i will die defending her choice. this woman was trapped married to a man who was emotionally physically and sexually abusive! her children - as much as she loves them and she LOVES them - are a product of that! she did not HAVE the option to a) take them with her or b) stay. ozai owned those children!! if he wanted them dead they would be dead!! ursa had no recourse but to do her best to save her child and then disappear forever

to me it’s very much like. fetishizing a woman’s suffering. suffering and anguishing over the knowledge she left her children makes her Noble, makes her sacrifice more Real. SUFFERING IS SIMPLY SUFFERING! LET THIS WOMAN LIVE HER LIFE!

#I GET SO MAD LOL #ursa

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panlight · 2 years

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It's illogical that Edward tries to claim that he doesn't love Bella in NM when he leaves. While Bella's self-esteem issues might make her believe him, isn't she supposed to be clever and intelligent and put things together easily? Wouldn't she pick up that he's trying to ease her pain and/or solidify his leaving? Why even include that aspect of his leaving when it doesn't affect the plot except to give Bella EVEN MORE angsting about Edward not loving her? Why not have him be honest?

That was my ultimate problem with New Moon.

I know for so many people the heartbreak really resonated and was wrenching and beautiful and you know, I love that for you.

But for me it was just like . . . so incredibly clear and obvious what the real reason that Edward left was that I could never fully get on board with Bella’s “oh of course he left me I’m human I’m nothing.” And I get that it’s about her self-esteem, and I get that her hallucinations of Edward was her subconscious realizing that yes, he still loved her and cared about her. Like, I understand what SM was trying to do here. I fully get it. But it was so frustrating to read when I as the reader was like “HE LEFT YOU BECAUSE HE LOVES YOU!” the whole time.

Bella, my friend, he left you after his brother tried to eat you. It’s just . . . it’s so obvious he left to protect you from death and/or vampirism and not because he got sick of you. The timing alone makes it perfectly clear.

“But he said--” girl, he lied. It was obvious he was lying. I mean . . . people talk about Bella needing therapy but that it would be useless because she can’t really tell them what’s going on but maybe at least therapy would help her with her self-esteem issues and she could be like “That son of a bitch lied and left me to protect me, I’m gonna run him over with my truck.”

And even at the end, when he’s back, and cuddling her, and telling her everything it takes like a whole chapter for her to be like “oh, you love me?” Again, I get what SM was going for but I found it really frustrating to read. Perhaps it would have worked better from a third person narrator? IDK but it was just so clear to me why Edward did what he did even on my first reading that it was frustrating that Bella didn’t see it.

The lying is my only real problem with him breaking up with her. I’ve seen people get mad at him because he didn’t give her a choice but that’s how break-ups work? They often aren’t mutual; there is usually one person who wants to end it for whatever reason and someone else who wants to keep trying. If Edward wants to break up with her because he thinks he’s bad for her that’s a choice he’s allow to make. You can’t like, force him to keep dating someone?? But he at least could have been honest about it. “Bella, I can’t stay with you. Look what happened with Jasper, you’re going to end up dead or worse, a vampire, and I can’t condemn you to that. I love you too much.” The whole lying and clean break stuff just doesn’t make a whole ton of sense, especially since Alice could foresee how it would go.

And also just like, the whole noble sacrifice of him leaving so she wouldn’t be doomed to a sad shadowy life as a vampire is completely invalidated by the vampiric fairy tale of Breaking Dawn, but that’s my other Big Problem with New Moon.

#asks

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visxionaries · 1 year

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ooc: Below we finally have the reveal of what truly went on regarding Cedric Tyrell’s family, his life, and his parents. It is the final journal entries written by Lady Eloise Tyrell, Lady of Highgarden during the Dance of Dragons.

TW: domestic abuse, mental abuse, suicide, murder, poison.

The hour was late, and whatever women had filled the space in the bed beside him had slinked back into the shadows of the night as the King of the Reach fixed his gaze upon the canopy above his head. Sleep evaded him this night, slipping in and out of his mind like a ghost; for he knew what day had dawned upon him when the sun rose.

It felt as though the sun would never rise on this day; the one in which all memories of Brightwater’s pearl ended in an ivory and gold shroud being wrapped around her body. How was he supposed to make her laugh by attempting to speak the Brightwater old tongue now?

There were two shrouds, the Lord and Lady of Highgarden; and yet, there was only one Cedric was unable to look away from that day. The tombs of both his parents had remained unvisited since the day of the funeral, and Eloise Tyrell still did not see her beloved son, even in death. For their deaths were seen as utterly twisted, utterly strange; for the two of them to leave this world together, leaving behind their children.

To deny themselves the heavens, for taking their own lives. The Gods did not deserve Eloise Tyrell. It would be she who denied them. “I don’t think mother killed herself...” Words that were sliced at the neck as the Pearl of Highgarden’s crimson blood spilled at her own wedding day, tainting a gown of white. His family was cursed. He was cursed, he knew this.

The movement in which he rolled onto his feet from laying upon his bed was so quick it almost made him dizzy, but he knew in that moment, he needed to do this now. He needed to do this now, or he would toss it into the flames and stop letting it haunt him. Sacrifice it to something bigger than he cared to know.

And finally, the diary was in his hands and away from the bottom of his personal desk, beneath parchment on parchment, letters on letters, petitions on petitions. The man seemed to move and behave in a way that meant his body moved first, and his mind thought after; for if he allowed himself to think, then he would never be able to stop. Or he would stop. He could not stop, not now.

And so, Cedric Tyrell read the thoughts of Brightwater’s pearl in her own unique, slightly scribbly hand. The dead had no privacy, didn’t they? Didn’t she want him to be able to read this? Why else would it have been hidden amongst the rows of books within the Tyrell’s personal library?

BELOW IS A DIARY ENTRY BY LADY ELOISE TYRELL, DATED OCTOBER 10TH, 135AC. It is a draft of a letter to send to her brother, Lord Allun Florent of Brightwater, father of Lord Omer Florent and Lady Rhea Tarly.

My Lord Brother of Brightwater, I implore you to reconsider your rejection of wardship for your nephew. Cedric is sharp in his wit and sharper still with his tongue, and has been raised as a son of Brightwater in his own way. I wish for him to be safe within this world, especially now more than ever. There is none other I would trust with looking over my son but you, my gracious Lord. The concern and insult for Oldtown’s ambitions continuing beyond this war are shared; in this, I assure you, Highgarden and Brightwater remain the most steadfast of allies. No son of Brightwater would be sent to ward with Oldtown; as you have always taught me. Concerns are, very high. A constant priority. A constant thought. Tá amanna is cosúil m'fhear céile as a meabhair. Tá amanna ann is dóigh liom go ndéanfaidh sé dochar dom. I wish for my son to see a piece of what it means to have Florent blood, my Lord - and if this were possible, you would have my utmost and undeniable gratitude. Perhaps my Lord can consider the strengths of having a Tyrell ward; it will give your own noble and virtuous son another to depend on. Má tharlaíonn aon rud dom, le do thoil a ghlacadh mo mhac. Please tell my nephew his aunt thinks of him. I have tried to send him some correspondence, however believe to have yet gotten a response; perhaps it is not getting through for I do not know where to reach him. Guím ort, a thiarna. Deartháir mór. Yours, Lady Eloise of Highgaren. Do dheirfiúr beag.

//

His kiss was one that was intimate and loving, as though they were once again the Pearl of Brightwater and the Lord of Highgarden within the many mazes that surrounded them. Watched them now, it felt like; as it felt like the whole realm watched and whispered of them. As it felt as though the Hightowers watched them, ready to turn their force upon Highgarden should they emerge victorious; to take everything from them.

Her forehead remained against the one of her husband for a moment, and she reached her hand forward to gently rest it upon his beard; closing her eyes. She knew what they needed to discuss, and yet for a moment, she wished to hear of anything but news of the war; wished to feel anything but the sense of impending weight and doom. He still loved her, he still loved her and only her; the Tarly woman meant nothing, and the boy...the boy did not displace her or their three children.

“It’ll all be over soon.” He whispered, moving to quietly stroke his thumb across her cheek; and perhaps if she were not so desperately wishing to feel nothing but his embrace, she would have noted the slight shake in his voice. Tasted something strange on his lips, that no doubt must be some new wine. They remained like that for some minutes, holding one another.

“For how long?” Her voice quietly muttered, her face turning into his gentle, loving touch; for how long could the Reach go without ripping themselves apart? “Until the Gods put another mad Targaryen on the throne?”

She feared she saw the disunity of the realm reflecting within her sons now. Saw how distant they were. How they were strangers within their own homes. She did not want them to think it were something light, something easy, to turn family against family; blade at the throat of brother.

“Forever, sweet angel.” Hector Tyrell’s voice sounded different now. He felt her still in his hands, still in the quiet realisation that something was terribly wrong; and when she looked up and saw blood trickling from his nose, it felt as though all the blood had drained from her own face. There was such intense guilt within his eyes, within broken eyes carrying the weight of a broken realm and a broken man; who decided he did not want to do this anymore.

Who decided she would not remain within the realm of the living without him. How could she?

“Hector-” She muttered, raising a shaking hand to wipe at the lips he had just kissed her with, and her voice broke into a small noise of fear upon realising what stained her dainty porcelain hand. Crimson, crimson blood; her own. Not his. Her own. “No-”

“Shh. Shh now.” His grip on her tightened as she struggled, and tightened more as her slurred sobs echoed and bounced around their chambers, and her body only fell limper and limper until it moved no more.

And as she slipped into eternal darkness, as she begged the Stranger and spoke in the Brightwater tongue to explain could not yet travel upon the river of death; her candle blew out forever. There were dried tears upon her face when the maids found her, still wrapped within the arms of her loving husband, who too had passed to face the Gods. And fresh tears.

#if i only could make a deal with god and get him to swap our places (eloise&cedric tyrell)#eloise tyrell ; brightwater's pearl.#me: my heart

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roman-catholic-mass-readings · 8 months

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24th October >> Mass Readings (Except USA)

Tuesday, Twenty Ninth Week in Ordinary Time

or

Saint Antony Mary Claret, Bishop.

Tuesday, Twenty Ninth Week in Ordinary Time

(Liturgical Colour: Green: A (1))

First Reading Romans 5:12,15,17-21 Divine grace, coming through Jesus Christ, came as an abundant free gift.

Sin entered the world through one man, and through sin death, and thus death has spread through the whole human race because everyone has sinned; but the gift itself considerably outweighed the fall. If it is certain that through one man’s fall so many died, it is even more certain that divine grace, coming through the one man, Jesus Christ, came to so many as an abundant free gift. If it is certain that death reigned over everyone as the consequence of one man’s fall, it is even more certain that one man, Jesus Christ, will cause everyone to reign in life who receives the free gift that he does not deserve, of being made righteous. Again, as one man’s fall brought condemnation on everyone, so the good act of one man brings everyone life and makes them justified. As by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so by one man’s obedience many will be made righteous. When law came, it was to multiply the opportunities of failing, but however great the number of sins committed, grace was even greater; and so, just as sin reigned wherever there was death, so grace will reign to bring eternal life thanks to the righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ our Lord.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm Psalm 39(40):7-10,17