#he might not NEED a drivers license
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#you know i was about to say his ass does not have a drivers license#but since jetters doesn't seem to have institutionalized schooling and instances of police seen in the series are situational#he might not NEED a drivers license
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Amazon's bestselling "bitter lemon" energy drink was bottled delivery driver piss
Today (Oct 20), I'm in Charleston, WV at Charleston's Taylor Books from 12h-14h.
For a brief time this year, the bestselling "bitter lemon drink" on Amazon was "Release Energy," which consisted of the harvested urine of Amazon delivery drivers, rebottled for sale by Catfish UK prankster Oobah Butler in a stunt for a new Channel 4 doc, "The Great Amazon Heist":
https://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-great-amazon-heist
Collecting driver piss is surprisingly easy. Amazon, you see, puts its drivers on a quota that makes it impossible for them to drive safely, park conscientiously, or, indeed, fulfill their basic human biological needs. Amazon has long waged war on its employees' kidneys, marking down warehouse workers for "time off task" when they visit the toilets.
As tales of drivers pissing – and shitting! – in their vans multiplied, Amazon took decisive action. The company enacted a strict zero tolerance policy for drivers returning to the depot with bottles of piss in their vans.
That's where Butler comes in: the roads leading to Amazon delivery depots are lined with bottles of piss thrown out of delivery vans by drivers who don't want to lose their jobs, which made harvesting the raw material for "Release Energy" a straightforward matter.
Butler was worried that he wouldn't be able to list his product on Amazon because he didn't have the requisite "food and drinks licensing" certificates, so he listed his drink in Amazon's refillable pump dispenser category. But Amazon's systems detected the mismatch and automatically shifted the product into the drinks section.
Butler enlisted some confederates to place orders for his drink, and it quickly rocketed to the top of Amazon's listings for the category, which led to Amazon's recommendation engine pushing the item on people who weren't in on the gag. When these orders came in, Butler pulled the plug, but not before an Amazon rep telephoned him to pitch him turning packaging, shipping and fulfillment over to Amazon:
https://www.wired.com/story/amazon-let-its-drivers-urine-be-sold-as-an-energy-drink/
The Release Energy prank was just one stunt Butler pulled for his doc; he also went undercover at an Amazon warehouse, during a period when Amazon hired an extra 1,000 workers for its warehouses in Coventry, UK, in a successful bid to dilute pro-union sentiment in his workforce in advance of a key union vote:
https://jacobin.com/2023/10/the-great-amazon-heist-oobah-butler-review
Butler's stint as an Amazon warehouse worker only lasted a couple of days, ending when Amazon recognized him and fired him.
The contrast between Amazon's ability to detect an undercover reporter and its inability to spot bottles of piss being marketed as bitter lemon energy drink says it all, really. Corporations like Amazon hire vast armies of "threat intelligence" creeps who LARP at being CIA superspies, subjecting employees and activists to intense and often illegal surveillance.
But while Amazon's defensive might is laser-focused on the threat of labor organizers and documentarians, the company can't figure out that one of its bestselling products is bottles of its tormented drivers' own urine.
In the USA, the FTC is suing Amazon for its monopolistic tactics, arguing that the company has found ways to raise prices and reduce quality by trapping manufacturers and sellers with its logistics operation, taking $0.45-$0.51 out of every dollar they earn and forcing them to raise prices at all retailers:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/25/greedflation/#commissar-bezos
The Release Energy stunt shows where Amazon's priorities are. Not only did Release Energy get listed on Amazon without any quality checks, the company actually nudged it into a category where it was more likely to be consumed by a person. The only notice the company took of Release Energy was in its logistics and manufacturing department – the part of the business that extracts the monopoly rents at issue in the FTC case – which tracked Butler down in order to sell him these services.
The drivers whose piss Butler collected don't work directly for Amazon, they work for a Delivery Service Partner. These DSPs are victims of a pyramid scheme that Amazon set up. DSP operators lease vans and pay to have them skinned in Amazon livery and studded with Amazon sensors. They take out long-term leases on depots, and hire drivers who dress in Amazon uniforms. Their drivers are minutely monitored by Amazon, down to the movements of their eyeballs.
But none of this is "Amazon" – it's all run by an "entrepreneur," whom Amazon can cut loose without notice, leaving them with unfairly terminated employees, outstanding workers' comp claims, a fleet of Amazon-skinned vehicles and unbreakable facilities leases:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/04/17/revenge-of-the-chickenized-reverse-centaurs/
Speaking to Wired, Amazon denied that it forces its drivers to piss in bottles, but Butler clearly catches a DSP dispatcher telling drivers "If you pee in a bottle and leave it [in the vehicle], you will get a point for that" – that is, the part you get punished for isn't the peeing, it's the leaving.
Amazon's defense against the FTC is that it spares no effort to keep its marketplace safe. As Amazon spokesperson James Drummond says, they use "industry-leading tools to prevent genuinely unsafe products being listed." But the only industry-leading tools in evidence are tools to bust unions and screw suppliers.
In her landmark Yale Law Review paper, "Amazon's Antitrust Paradox," FTC Chair Lina Khan makes a brilliant argument that Amazon's alleged benefits to "consumers" are temporary at best, illusory at worst:
https://www.yalelawjournal.org/note/amazons-antitrust-paradox
In Butler's documentary, Khan's hypothesis is thoroughly validated: here's a company extracting hundreds of billions from merchants who raise prices to compensate, and those monopoly rents are "invested" in union-busting and countermeasures against investigative journalists, while the tools to keep you from accidentally getting a bottle of piss in the mail are laughably primitive.
Truly, Amazon is the apex predator of the platform era:
https://pluralistic.net/ApexPredator
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/20/release-energy/#the-bitterest-lemon
My next novel is The Lost Cause, a hopeful novel of the climate emergency. Amazon won't sell the audiobook, so I made my own and I'm pre-selling it on Kickstarter!
#pluralistic#release energy#channel 4#amazon#corporate intelligence#labor#unions#amazon labor union#the great Amazon heist#catfish uk#oobah butler#delivery service partner
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⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ furious at you (for making me feel this way.) — luke castellan
ᡣ𐭩 word count: 1.2K
ᡣ𐭩 pairing: luke castellan x fem!reader
ᡣ𐭩 summary: y/n and luke have to share a room and tensions are released.
ᡣ𐭩 warnings/contents: suggestive. implied sexual activities. tension. enemies with benefits? sub!luke. dom!reader.
ᡣ𐭩 author’s comment: first luke fic omgomgomg. i feel like i’m cheating on ethan/jack 🫣
“luke if your fingers gets near the stereo i’ll bit them off.” y/n grumbled.
“we’ve been listening to your music the entire trip.” luke argued.
“it’s been only 20 minutes, and i’m the one driving, therefore, i’m the one in charge.”
percy, grover and annabeth, who were sitting in the back, were completely unaware of the argument. they knew that the two teenagers would soon start to bicker so they had put their headphones on as soon as they entered the car.
“well, then. let me drive.” luke said.
“oh, yeah? where’s your drivers license?” she arched an eyebrow.
“i don’t need one.” luke shrugged. “if you can do it, so can i.”
“my god, you’re a child.” y/n rolled her eyes. “and yes, you need one, unless your goal is to get arrested. and that’s not on my holiday bingo.”
“i just want to listen to something other than taylor swift.” luke sighed.
“then use these lovely things called headphones. they’re great!”
“i forgot to bring them.”
“that sounds like a you problem.” the girl shrugged. “now shush. i love this song.”
“i hate you.”
ignoring him, she turned the volume up, and the story of us started resonating inside the small car. from the corner of her eye, y/n could see luke tapping his fingers against his thigh as he slowly moved his head to the rhythm of the song.
“not that bad, huh?” y/n smirked.
“it’s okay.” he tried to play it cool, but she could feel him absorbing the lyrics of the song as well as the sound of the instruments in the background.
the rest of the drive to the coast was surprisingly calm, without arguments. though the peace was short-lived because as soon as they arrived to the hotel they were going to stay at, the receptionist informed them there had been an incident with the rooms.
y/n had booked two rooms—one with three beds for the kids and one with two beds for luke and her. but something happened with her and luke’s room so they wouldn’t be able to use it.
“okay, but do you have any other available rooms?” y/n asked the woman.
“the only ones available have one bed.”
“like really really large beds where it would be impossible for us to be close?” luke intervened.
y/n sent him a glare. “sorry about him. he hasn’t matured yet.” she smiled apologetically, and the receptionist looked between them, amused. “we’ll take that room.”
“we won’t charge you, it was the hotel’s problem. i’m very sorry for the inconvenience.”
“it’s fine. thank you very much.” y/n said politely, grabbing the keys. both of them walked back to the kids and explained the situations. “we’ll have to room differently. i’ll be sleeping with beth, and luke will stay with you two.”
“i don’t think so.” annabeth said, taking the keys from y/n before she could react. “take this as an opportunity to bond so you can stop annoying us with your constant bickers. good night!” and then it was just y/n and luke in the lobby, looking dumbfounded.
“okay. whatever i just want to sleep.” y/n said as she started walking to their room, luke following behind.
“i can’t believe we have to sleep on the same bed. this is a nightmare.” luke groaned when they entered the decent-sized room.
“i have no intentions of touching you, so i don’t see the problem” y/n said and then smirked, ready to tease him. “unless you’re worried you might not resist me and end up cuddling me.”
luke scoffed “as if. my body is repulsed by you, its staying far far far away from you as possible.”
“great. so there’s no problem, then. you can stop whining like a baby.”
he crossed his arms in front of his chest. “not whining.”
“you are. you even scrunch your face like a baby does when they’re about to cry.” she demonstrated said expression.
luke’s jaw clenched. “it’s actually my repulsed face. i can’t help it.”
“if it bothers you so much, you are very welcome to sleep on the hall.” she went to her bag and grabbed her pijamas, then she turned around—back facing the boy—and pulled her shirt off.
“what are you doing?!” his voice might’ve hit the octave. “there’s a bathroom to your right, you exhibitionist.”
y/n had to bit her lip not to laugh. there was something so rewarding about teasing luke, she was never able stop herself. “calm down. it’s just my back… oh wait, i forgot you are not familiar with female anatomy, my bad.”
luke rolled his eyes. ever since he let it slip that he was a virgin, the girl has been mocking him about it. it’s not that he didn’t catch the attention of people at camp, because almost everyone drooled over the camp counselor, but he just wasn’t attracted to anyone enough to have sex with them.
well, that was a lie. there was one girl who luke was painfully attracted to. but the gods hated him because he hated her guts almost as much as he wanted to strip her out of her clothes and fuck her like he hated her. and now he had to share a bed with said girl.
“care to show me, then?” luke wanted to tease her back, but as soon as those words left his mouth he cringed.
thankfully y/n just laughed and got under the white sheets. “in your dreams, castellan. now, please get in bed so i can turn the ligh-“ she lost the ability to formulate words when the tall boy stripped off his shirt, showing his toned arms and the lines of his abs.
“what? are you bothered by my male anatomy?” he mocked as he climbed into bed.
bothered? more like flustered, the girl thought. y/n said nothing as she turned the lamp off, the only source of light came from the moonlight. the sheets felt heavy against her heated body, so she shoved them off.
the bed wasn’t big enough. only a few inches separated their bodies and the tension lingered heavily in the air.
luke could make out the shape of her body under the light of the moon, and the sight was enough to drive him insane. “oh, fuck it.”
y/n seemed to have read his mind because her body gravitated towards him and their lips met in one ferocious kiss. in between lip bites, hair pullings and ragged breaths they got rid of their clothes.
“are you sure?” whispered y/n from above him.
luke nodded desperately. “i never wanted something as much as i want you.”
“god, luke. you drive me crazy. do you know how many times i’ve dreamt about this scenario?” y/n confessed making pauses to bite his neck. she was really drunk in lust because that was something she wouldn’t dare say aloud to him under other circumstances. hell, she was probably to regret saying it the following morning.
“probably not as many times as i did.” he squeezed her hips, eager to feel her. she was taking it slow, probably to torture him, and it was both agonising and hot. just like her.
“doubtful.” she kissed his swollen lips.
“please, y/n.” he said in a breathy plead.
“what do you want?” her hands explored his chest.
“anything. just please do something, i’m dying here.”
y/n took mercy on him and gave him what he desperately needed. and luke under her, begging and squirming in pleasure was something y/n never thought she would see. now, it was going to be imprinted on her mind forever. tattooed on her brain until her very last breath.
#luke castellan#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan x you#luke castellan fluff#luke castellan fic#percy jackson#pjo series#luke castellan smut#charlie bushnell#charlie bushnell x reader#luke castellan fanfic
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without you there’s nothing to live for - l.norris
masterlist
pairings: lando norris x fem!reader
warnings: jealousy + insecurities + fluff + build up(kinda long I’m sorry about that) + some errors here or there
a/n: while I had bits and pieces of this work in millions of other lando drafts I think I have to give credit where it’s due to @userlando and her anons ☺️🫶 I’m in such a shit mood so i figured posting this might make me feel better. enjoy xx
Lando Norris was annoying. a childhood friend of yours that somehow stuck throughout the years and never seemed to vanish. he was like a a piece of gum stuck to your shoe, he just never left.
and while you’re thankful he’s the longest lasting friendship you have; did you fail to mention he could be annoying?
his hands drum against the kitchen island, a distraction worthy of you flicking your pencil in his direction, but he’s too quick the pencil would just end up behind him, so you result in throwing him a very pointed look that shuts him up.
“is that pencil up your ass too today?”
you give him another look before staring down at the empty grocery list you failed to create, because lando has claimed your flat as his flat. the lavish lifestyle penthouse was abandoned at the instant call of your arrival to Monaco, and now all of his expensive taste clutters your space.
“did you put eggs on the list? I need eggs. it’s good protein—“ he shuts up to the sound of you breaking the pencil in half, another annoyed look tossed his way.
lando could be a lot. but there was no one who could keep up with you. there was no one like him in your corner, and while he pushed your buttons you were eternally grateful for his loyalty despite your rather jaded friendship.
“let’s just go to the store? I’ll drive.” he says like there’s another alternative to the store. ever since he got his license and moved in, you’ve never even put your foot on the accelerator. you’ve almost forgot the thrilling feeling of driving.
“eggs have been added to the list.” you finally say, typing up your notes of a grocery list once you were finally able to think straight without lando tapping away or chatting your ear off.
god was he annoying, but you loved him for him.
—
his wallet funds are bigger than what you have. you feel guilty every time he buys, but it’s not like you have the funds to do so. he knows that guilty look across your face when he ends up paying for 10% groceries and 90% female hygiene products. he doesn’t mind, just shoves his card in the machine and says a thank you for the person who bags your things.
“you have to let me pay you back—“
“no, nonsense.” he cuts you off, the conversation goes like it always does. you beg, and beg, to try and wiggle in a payback, but he refuses. all those years of your parents giving him shelter, taking him to races, or letting him play in your backyard it’s the least he could do.
“but the price adds up, and you’re paying for most of the rent—“
“I won’t have this conversation with you. just get in the car.” he says it without letting you have another word in. it’s his turn to shoot you down with pointed looks every time you try to mention money.
“y/n?! is that you?”
lando’s heart nearly drops to his stomach at the sound of that voice—that voice, being your ex boyfriend. he came out of nowhere, like the stalker he is, and finds himself walking around lando’s spiffy mclaren with wide eyes and confusion at your presence with the formula one driver. he must’ve forgotten lando was your best friend.
“you going to introduce me to your new boyfriend?”
before you can protest lando shakes his hand. you can tell by the grip lando has on him it’s a firm hard handshake. one to prove a point about the 2 a.m calls of you crying to your best friend from across the world. he was a shitty man, and maybe showing lando off like that would put him in his place.
“this is lando, you guys met awhile back.” you say.
you watch the two of their eyes glimmer in the sunlight with hatred for one another. lando was the guy you told him not to worry about— and he still was— and he was the guy lando was desperately wanting to kick ass.
“don’t remember that.”
“I actually remember, didn’t you spend half the night snogging another girl?” lando’s gentle reminder makes your ex’s face flush pale. you watch a little smile lift to lando’s lips before you both excuse yourselves to head home.
“my new boyfriend is so cool.” you say in a sarcastic tone once it’s just the two of you in his car.
lando let’s out laugh, and just puts the car in reverse. the simple act makes your head spin. his hand reaching behind the head of your seat, the way his eyes quickly glance on you before he looks back to ensure no one is coming. these thoughts were never present until this run in. would lando be a good boyfriend?
you can’t help but explore those thoughts in the twenty minute car ride home in pure silence.
your mind wanders to the idea of waking up to him in your bed. his legs tangled with yours, lazy soft kisses pressed your cheeks. you could melt at just the thought of it.
or maybe he’d make you eggs. you’d wake to the smell of bacon grease and him shirtless—like he always is in the kitchen— creating a masterpiece meal that you devour in minutes.
what switch has suddenly changed in you? because now when you look at lando, your heart does things it never did before. your head spins of ideas of him as your boyfriend and it’s so sickening you could throw up.
“I’m going to unload the groceries, you’re more than welcome to sit and stare into space for as much as you need.” his words spook you. a little yelp escaped your lips that he’d caught you. your eyes bug wide—like they always are when you get into your daydreams— and mind so full you lose track of time and often forget your surroundings. you had no clue you’d been sitting in the driveway this whole time.
“where do you want the tampons again? I seem to forget.”
“under the bathroom sink please.”
you wonder if you can shove your thoughts under there too. a nap is needed to clear your mind of whatever seems to be boggling it all about lando.
—
a nap certainly did help, however, waking up to lando shirtless in your bed also napping? yeah, all that hard work of suppressed thoughts came right back.
you think about taking your finger and running it all over the divots, curves, and muscles of his body. you think about how much stronger he’s been looking lately and how the little hair on his chin is growing onto you. what is going on with you?
it was common for lando to come in your room and sleep with you. nightmares were rare for you, but they happened more often than you expected and lando always wanted to be there for it. but this was just a nap? why did he have to come in and sleep with you? he could’ve just slept in his own bed, that certainly would’ve helped your heart if he did.
you roll out of bed and tip toe around your bed, until your heart makes you stop. you stare at his peaceful state. the way his curls fall over his forehead, the thick long lashes you desperately want, the soft smile on his lips— his eyes are opening, shit, you think to yourself.
you quickly book it out of the room to save yourself from the embarrassment of him catching you watching him sleep. what a creep you were becoming in the matter of hours. this is why you shouldn’t like your best friend. hell, this is why you shouldn’t let your man best friend live with you. it was destined for one of you to fall in love.
but it was also destined for you to most likely get your heart broken.
lando doesn’t date women like you. you’ve seen his roster of women rotating in and out of your place, none of them looked like you: an average woman with average looks. who’d want that?
a little part of hope lingers in your chest when you see him enter the kitchen. his lips press against your temple as he mumbles a good morning.
“how was your nap?”
“not long enough.” you admit watching him type away on his phone. his elbows are pressed against the granite counter tops, his fingers work vigorously against the screen. a little smile appears on his lips that make you nauseous. it could just be max, but it could be another girl.
almost two hours ago this wouldn’t of mattered to you. you wouldn’t of cared if lando invited a girl over and you stayed locked up in your room, but now all of a sudden it’s bothersome.
“what’s got you all smiley?” you ask, partially out of curiosity but partially to just kill your heart with his response. he sets his phone face down on the counter resting his chin in the palm of his hand, “max is coming over, and so is pietra.”
“exciting.” you grin, though the words disagree with your expression making his face drop with worry.
“are you worried max is going to take your best friend spot? he could never, y/n.”
best friend. yeah, that’s all you’ll ever be when girls like ria and pietra exist. deadly beauty that could put a man in his place. when was yours ever going to show up?
—
you’re tipsy off the expensive bottle of wine max brought. your body is pressed against lando’s for support as you all laugh about something max said. you can’t help but wrap your arms around his strong bicep, resting your head against his shoulder listening to pietra expose Max’s recent mess up.
lando doesn’t take notice in the way you’re seated. he knows you’re beside him based off the heat that radiates off your body. you always got overly warm when drunk, and sometimes a bit too affectionate, but he didn’t mind. he actually loved it when you wanted to be beside him.
“so when did this happen?” pietra points her finger between you two, a bright smile pressed against her lips as she cozies herself up to her own boyfriend.
lando clears his throat. he practically yanks his arm out of your grip leaving you to fall back against the cushions beside him. you hide your face into his back out of embarrassment suddenly becoming aware of how you two look. “oh umm—“
“oh gosh! I’m so sorry. I think it’s the wine talking in me.” she quickly apologizes, a blush filters her face similar to yours.
“it’s not the first time today that’s happened.”
“do tell,” max sits on the edge of his seat listening to lando explain the run in, your face is still pressed into his back. you’re hoping that maybe if you just stay there you would disappear into thin air or end up in your bedroom sound asleep away from all of this.
“I still want to kick that guys ass—“
“wait,” pietra cuts off max, her voice demands all the attention in the room. you pry your head from out of lando and peer behind him at her, “you didn’t even tell him you are just friends? you let him assume that you’re dating?”
lando’s mouth opens and closes. nothing seems to come out making max throw his head back in a laughing fit, “oh god! I owe ria money for this, you like y/n!”
Lando’s face is flushed red, a similar color to the glass of wine in his hands. there was nothing he could say. he couldn’t even protest it when it was true. he hadn’t even realized he never corrected your ex boyfriend, because truth be told, he wanted to be shown off as your boyfriend.
“come on pietra, let’s leave these two alone.”
they leave as quick as they came, leaving only the half full bottle of wine for yourselves. you both sit in silence, no one musters up the courage to speak.
you both get ready for bed like nothing happened. the awkward silence eats you up. you want to speak up and tell him you feel the same, you want things to go back to normal. you just want annoying lando back.
when you finally finish your nighttime regiment, you’re ready for bed. you turn the corner into your bedroom and see the silhouette of lando reflecting against the wall. your night light was on, and he was laying in your bed, cozied up under the covers.
“sleeping in here tonight?” you ask slipping under the covers beside him, he moves himself closer to you occupying the middle of the bed.
“you don’t mind, do you?”
you shake your head curling your body against his, “I like it when you sleep with me.” you say making a sense of pride soar through his chest. he likes the way your body molds against his.
“your new boyfriend will protect you.” he smiles down at you, carefully place a kiss to your forehead before reaching over and turning off your lamp.
“thank goodness he’s here, I can’t sleep without him.”
“you know I’m talking about myself right?” he lifts his neck up, face looking down at you, your eyes closed practically half asleep already.
“goodnight, boyfriend.”
“goodnight, girlfriend.”
tags: @oconso @xcicix @imsorare @weasleyswizardwheezes-blog @monzabee @lpab @frreyaa @motorsp0rt @lovelytsunoda @smoothopz
want to be apart of my tag list? let me know here!
#lando norris#lando norris drabble#lando norris imagine#lando norris x reader#lando norris fluff#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x you#lando norris smut#lando norris fic#lando norris blurb#f1 imagine#f1 x you#f1 driver x you#f1 fanfic#f1 x y/n#f1 driver x reader#f1 x reader#f1 imagines#f1 fic#f1 x female reader#f1 x oc#f1 fluff#formula 1 fic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x you#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x y/n#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1 x oc
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You pulling in made me wish your Dad pulled out
(A/N): Thank you to @foreveralbon for workshopping this fic with me with this prompt. I don't know what to do if you weren't my muse.
Summary: Charles pissed off his neighbor with his parking. Her answers are notes taped to his car window. How can evolve more out of that?
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x female!reader
Wordcount: 1.6k
🏎Masterlist🏎
________________________
(Y/N) knows that she isn’t the most professional car parker. She should never start a career as a valet for sure. After all, she needed a second attempt on her own practical test to attain her drivers license.
But there is this one neighbor of hers. She doesn’t know what he looks like, what his name is or where he even lives. But (Y/N) knows one thing for sure: He is a shit parker.
Like, he is the worst person at parking that has ever walked the world. If he could, he probably would park his oh so expensive car onto other cars. But she tries to not let that get too close to her. After all, we just talk about parking spaces and it’s not worth getting her blood pressure up over it.
But (Y/N) found her tipping point.
Her whole morning has been a shit show. Her alarm went off, but she accidentally turned it off instead of giving herself another five minutes of sleep. Five minutes turned into 45. That meant the young woman had to rush through her usual morning routine and she is 90 % sure that she put at least one clothing item on the wrong way.
But it’s ok, she is still on time. She just needs to get out of the car par-
This is where (Y/N) last thread of patience with that neighbor snaps in two like a potato chip, crisp and unclean. This person parked the front half of his car in a way that completely blocks (Y/N)’s rear end from exiting the car in a way that does not hinder the sidewalk.
It takes a solid seven minutes to get out of her spot, trying not to scratch hers or another car. Arriving a few minutes late at work because of that and receiving a reprimand from her boss is really the young woman’s last straw. On her lunch break she does some snooping on the internet and comes across a really fine find. It’s worth the price and shipping cost to her.
Actually, she can’t wait for the week it is supposed to take to arrive at her doorstep.
But the time between that particular day and the day of arrival do fly by when you use it getting madder and madder at the dickhead that is unable to park like a normal person.
The next occurrence doesn’t take long after (Y/N)’s package finally arrives. She wanted to park her vehicle in her usual spot when Mr. Ferrari already took his and her own too. How can one person be such an asshole?
(Y/N) takes one of the business card sized cuts out of her glove box and puts it in the slit of the black car’s window. Satisfied with her work she steps back into her vehicle and looks for a different spot, ending up walking several minutes back to her apartment building, having to look somewhere farther away.
Charles can see from a distance that there is a card at his car’s windowshield. Which makes him suspicious. Surely no one thinks that he wants to sell his car for cheap, so it can’t be one of those car handler’s business cards. Maybe it’s a new ruse of thieves, trying to get him to stand long enough at his car to read it and be able to steal his car. Or they are kidnappers. Anyways, he makes quick work of putting the card into his pocket and drives off at a neck breaking speed.
When he arrives at his destination, the Monegasque pulls the piece of paper out and reads it. “The way you pulled in makes me wish your dad pulled out”, he reads aloud, laughing a little to himself.
He has to admit that he might not be the best at parking. Who is he even kidding, he would win the world championship at being the worst car parker possible. But the thought of someone getting that angered over his non-existent skills.
It’s something that makes him happy throughout his entire day. Which is his main reason to try and look how much he can piss that particular neighbor off even more.
So Charles starts parking even worse. If he also starts on the habit of watching out of his window more often now, he would claim it is just a coincidence.
But something in him wants to meet that neighbor.
That person that gets more and more creative with their insults. One time they called him an obstacle to evolution. The other day the business card said something along the lines of him belonging to the asshole club now.
Another, a handwritten, note asked him not to reproduce. The neighbor even left a condom for him. This made Charles laugh so loudly, that (Y/N) looked out her opened window.
She just finished one of the worst shifts she ever had since starting that job and all she wants is just a quiet evening to come down from the stress. Just the noise of the laugh is enough to set her off again.
Seeing her handsome neighbor from under her apartment pocketing the note and condom she left just minutes earlier isn’t what she expected. Watching him opening the car, sitting down and driving off is even less on her list.
It kind of destroys her world view, realizing that hot neighbor and asshole parker are the same person. In the last couple of weeks (Y/N) started to get some fun out of the mean comments she left at the black Ferrari’s window. This also could be her chance to finally make a move on him.
The young woman waits for the brunette to return with his car and stays seated on her couch for another couple minutes, for extra measure of course. After that, she leaves the apartment building with her prepared note and tapes it to the car’s rear window.
Charles on the other side stays glued to his window as soon as he enters his apartment. He finally wants to catch the person that gets angrier and angrier each time he parks in an outrageous way in the act.
Seeing the beautiful neighbor, who lives above him, sticking another note to his car makes his heart flutter in an unexpected way. For some time now he wanted to get to know her and if everything went according to his original plan, ask her out on a date. But maybe he can now use this to his advantage.
As soon as the beautiful neighbor is back in the building Charles waits an extra couple minutes before he once again makes his way to his car.
Running over his vehicle with a pep in his step, Charles is kind of excited about what insults or threats await him now. He has to admit, he actually parked pretty decently. Or as decent as he is able to. So the note has to be at least a little bit nicer than the previous ones.
“Hey neighbor. I thought instead of shitting on you and your parking skills even more, I want you to help and get better. I may not be a driving teacher, but helping you wouldn’t make your skills worse. Just text me with the times you are available at ;)” signed with (Y/N)’s name and number.
It’s kind of funny to explain to the press later how Charles met (Y/N) and became her boyfriend.
"Yeah, well I know that my driving has become sort of a, a meme,” he answers when asked a week after his announcement on instagram, “And my neighbor wasn’t too fond of it either. So she started to leave me these really funny, but also really aggressive notes at my car. One said something like I won the inconsiderate Parker Price. Which made me quite proud.” This entices a laugh out of the journalist. “Yeah, (Y/N) has a really good way with words, I fear. But in the end she offered me some parking lessons.” Charles smiles and thinks back to them.
He had texted (Y/N) immediately and they set up a date for the lesson two days away. But they still continued to text non stop and by the time they met up, it felt like they had been friends for years.
Which didn’t stop (Y/N) raging at Charles after his fifth failed attempt of parking his car according to her instructions. “I don’t believe you anymore. With the way you park you are not from Monaco but the deepest and wildest parts of Italy! Your Ferrari seems really fitting now!” This drew a laugh out of him until she graced him with the meanest look he didn’t expect her to be able to muster up.
“How about dinner as a thank you and apology?” He asked sheepishly, trying both to diffuse the situation and make his move. Why not shoot his shot right now?
Luckily the young woman agreed.
“In the end my parking skills weren’t enough to win her over, but my charm was what scored me a second date.”
And a third. A relationship. After some more funny parking jokes and him kneeling down on one knee with a ring and the promise to take lessons to keep their future family safe he even scored himself his unexpected forever.
#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fanfic#x reader#reader insert#charles leclerc x female!reader#x female!reader
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⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ SPEED DRIVE!
↳ part two!
ferrari driver!percy jackson x fem!reader
masterlist | rules
warnings one swear word!
on the radio . . . speed drive (charlie xcx)
percy knew it was a bad idea leaving his house without at least a pair of sunglasses to conceal his identity. he was craving cookie dough ice cream, the grocery store wasn’t too far away and it was the middle of the night - who would possibly recognise him at a time like this?
the answer is many people. while percy did love his loyal fans, both tifosi and others, even he had to admit they were a little crazy. all it took was for one to snap a photo and post it on twitter and the rest seemed to immediately spawn all around him
“percy, is it true that luke might lose his seat next year?” he heard one voice say as he attempted to weave through the thick crowd of people. why couldn’t he have one second of peace? unfortunately, percy had made another awful decision that night - walking to the grocery store
this left ferrari’s golden boy with two options: either tough out the wall home with fans and paparazzi alike swarming him, or find someone who was willing to drive him home. with cars on the street in front of him were stationery thanks to the red light, percy made his decision
he bolted for the first one that caught his eye, a car that was small, (ironically) bright red and most importantly had an open roof. percy also had to admit the driver was kind of pretty, at least from what he could see from that far away
the light turned yellow and you prepared yourself to continue driving. you’d only recently gotten your drivers license and this was your first time driving without someone more experienced with you in the car, so you were just praying to end up at your apartment in one piece
just as the light became green and you began to drive, some random guy jumped into the passenger seat of your car, causing your heart rate to increase dramatically and your foot to immediately press on the brakes - out of shock or fear (or both), you weren’t sure
“drive!” he nearly yelled at you. you just stared at him, your mouth agape. it was way too late at night for this. at your state, percy huffed and leaned over to the wheel, beginning to steer for you
this snapped you out of the daze you were in and you slapped his hands away, your brows furrowing in anger as you drove, “who the fuck are you and what do you think you’re doing in my car? i’m pulling over right now, you need to get out.”
“no, please, i promise i didn’t mean any harm! can you just drop me off at my house?” he asked. you didn’t need to look at him to know he was incredibly desperate. who was this guy? as you recalled his face from when he first got into your car, you realised he did look a little familiar, but you still couldn’t figure out his identity
at your silence, percy continued, “i’ll do anything, do you like car racing? i can get you tickets for that!”
okay, so he was rich rich. you didn’t know the first thing about racing, but one of your friends was obsessed with formula one. specifically, a driver called peter jameson (or something along those lines). still, you rolled your eyes at his offer, disliking the way he attempted to bribe you
“no, it’s fine, you don’t have to do anything. where do you live?”
after percy told you his address, the car ride was silent. neither of you knew what to say to the other. you were still shaken by his sudden appearance, and percy was trying to conceal the blush that coated his cheeks. he was right, you were beautiful. the moon made your skin glow and your eyes brighter. from the death grip you had on the wheel, percy could tell you were new at driving. cute
“thanks a lot, you have absolutely no idea how much you helped me tonight,” percy said as he got out of your car. part of you was a little sad to see him go. sure, he freaked you out, but something about him was magnetic - maybe it was those sea green eyes that put all of poseidon’s oceans to shame, or the light dusting of freckles you hadn’t noticed until now
giving him a small smile, you said, “you’re welcome. have a good night.” you stayed for a little and watched as he entered his home, a bittersweet feeling tugging at your heart
once you’d gotten home, you noticed he’d left something on the passenger seat. a strip of paper with a line of messily scrawled numbers lay on the leather
call me. (917) 173-1839 — PJ
#percy jackson x reader#percy jackson x you#percy jackson x y/n#percy jackson#percy jackson x fem reader#pjo#pjo x reader#percy jackson fanfic#percy jackson blurb#f1 driver pjo#f1 driver percy jackson#f1 driver percy jackson x reader#cynwrites
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𝕭𝖊𝖘𝖙 𝖊𝖓𝖊𝖒𝖎𝖊𝖘
𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘵 𝘚𝘵𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘰𝘭𝘰 𝘹 𝘺𝘯
★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★
★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ��� ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★
𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙
𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤: smut, unprotected sex (DON’T DO THAT), alcohol consumption, mention of dangerous driving choking, adrenaline, mean!Matt, rough sex.
𝔖𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: After a disappointing discovery in the middle of the night, y/n turns to her last resort to get home—her worst enemy, Matt. But things will take a different turn that night.
𝔑𝔬𝔱𝔢: Sorry if the ending isn't amazing; I didn't know how to finish it. It's been sitting in my drafts for weeks.
★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★
Here I am at my ex's place, again.
As if the four previous betrayals weren't enough, I had to fall back into his arms, again.
It was 3 a.m. We had just come back from a random party, and when he went to shower, I couldn't help but snoop through his phone.
It wasn't new; trust clearly never existed in our relationship, and I was too drunk to stop myself from going further.
Unsurprisingly, while snooping through his phone, I saw that he had continued talking to the girl he had cheated on me with the week before.
I thought he had truly changed this time and that tonight we would be able to have fun in bed! What a fool I was.
Tears didn't even come this time; I was too accustomed to this situation. I simply got up, silently grabbed my things, and grabbed a cheap bottle of vodka from his bar. What? I needed it more than him, and anyway, he probably won't miss it given its price! Then I stumbled out.
"Oh my fucking god!" I sighed as I took a big gulp from the vodka bottle.
I grabbed my phone from my pocket to order an Uber, only to realize that at this hour, the prices were exorbitant.
"Fuck!" I groaned, tossing my head back before straightening up and fixing my hair.
My heels were killing my feet, and my dress was far too revealing for me to hitchhike or even consider walking home.
I went through my contacts and called all my friends, more or less close, who had their driver's licenses, hoping that one of them would be awake. Of course, none of them were.
I took a deep breath, trying not to lose patience and throw my phone on the ground. What the fuck am I supposed to do right now??
I took another gulp; this time, I almost fell to the ground because of the amount of alcohol in my blood.
In reality, I had one option left, one person I didn't want to call. Matt.
I don't even know how I have his number in my phone; this guy is clearly the last person I want to talk to.
I turned back towards my ex's apartment for a moment, sarcastically thinking maybe it's not so bad anyway. It wouldn't be the first time I went straight back to him after he cheated on me.
Then my eyes returned to my screen, where it said ‘Matt’ in my contacts. I owe it to myself to have a little more respect than that.
I sighed before dialing the number; maybe he was sleeping too, maybe he wouldn't even answer, and even if he did, he probably wouldn't want to come pick me up.
I let the phone ring for a few seconds before telling myself that this was all ridiculous and hanging up.
Oh well, anyway, in both situations, I was dissatisfied, so I might as well turn to something I'm used to!
I started walking back towards his apartment when my phone started ringing.
I didn't waste a second to answer, hoping it was one of my friends who had seen my call, but of course, it wasn't.
"Why the fuck are you calling at 3 am, y/n," I heard Matt's raspy voice say, with the muffled sound of music behind him.
"I need you to do me a favor," I said, rolling my eyes, and he started laughing.
"Yeah, sure, bye," he began to say before I cut him off.
"No, Matt! Please, I'm serious!" I said, desperate.
I heard him sigh as if annoyed, but he didn't say anything more.
"Come on, you know I wouldn't have asked you if I had any other option, please," I added, biting my lip.
"It must be something really important for you to beg me like this," he said in a provocative tone, what an asshole.
"I'm not begging you, asshole," I said, getting annoyed. The insult came out on its own, and I can't even blame it on the alcohol because I really wanted to say it.
"Insult me one more time and I'll hang up. You're lucky I even had the decency to call you back," he said condescendingly.
I sighed, gosh, why did I call him?
"What do you want?" he added.
"I need you to come pick me up," I started to say before he burst into laughter.
"I'm busy right now, y/n, I'm not your damn taxi. Aren't you old enough to call an Uber?" he said.
"Do you see the time? It's way too expensive right now!" I complained.
"Well, that's not my problem, so figure it out!" he said, and I could hear the smirk in his voice. It must have pleased him to know I was in this situation.
"Matt, come on!" I said, grumbling.
"And what do I get out of it?" he replied.
"I don't know, whatever you want, I just want to go home!" I told him.
"God, you're really annoying, y/n," he said, sighing, and I smiled, understanding what that meant. "Where are you?"
"At Ben's," I replied.
"Y/n, are you fucking kidding me? He lives on the other side of town!" he said, getting annoyed.
"You're a fucking liar, Matt, you live barely 15 minutes from here!" I said, furrowing my brows.
"I told you I'm busy, I'm at a party. You're making me go out of my way to take you home!" he said, still angry.
"You know what, Matt? Go fuck yourself if you're going to leave a completely drunk girl in the street in the middle of the night," I snapped, furious, before hanging up. What a fucking asshole! I hate him so much!
I kicked a rock lying there, feeling anger bubbling up even more.
I brought the bottle to my lips again, this time taking three big swallows. If I had to go back to Ben's, I'd need a lot more alcohol than this.
I was about to start walking back to my ex's apartment when I felt my phone vibrate again. It was Matt, again.
"Matt—" I started to say before being cut off by his voice.
"Don't move from where you are, I'm coming," he said, sternly, before hanging up.
"I—" I started to say before realizing he had hung up, then I sighed.
Ultimately, I didn't even know if it was a good thing or a bad thing.
I stumbled over to the bench across the street and sat down.
"What did I do to deserve this?" I sighed, looking up at the sky before taking another drink.
At this point, I'd even prefer to go into an alcohol-induced coma! It might sound exaggerated to you, but believe me, it's not!
As far back as I can remember, the relationship I had with Matt was contentious.
It all started in high school when I met Nick, who quickly became a close friend of mine. Then I met Chris and Matt, his brothers.
At first, everything seemed fine until Matt decided to start hating me overnight for no reason.
Anyway, since then, he became cold and distant, which really hurt me, especially since at that time, I had a crush on him. So, I quickly started to dislike him, and since then, nothing has changed; we've remained ‘best enemies.’
After waiting for about 30 minutes, I saw Matt arrive in his car and park right in front of me.
"I thought you were on the other side of town?" I said without moving from where I was.
"I hurried; I wasn't going to leave a drunk girl alone on the street," he replied, referencing what I had told him earlier.
"Mmhm, feeling guilty, huh?" I said with a smirk.
"Shut the fuck up and get in the damn car, y/n," he said, getting annoyed.
"Fuck you," I said, squinting.
Let's just say the amount of alcohol I had consumed in the meantime hadn't made me any nicer.
"Okay, that's enough; figure it out yourself, y/n," he said, starting the car again.
"No! Okay, I'm kidding! God, you take everything too seriously!" I said, chuckling, and quickly got up to reach his car.
Once I reached the door, I tried to open it, but it was locked. "Matt, open up."
"Ask me nicely, and we'll see," he said.
"Don't be a pain; just unlock the door for me!" I said, continuing to try to open it.
He didn't say anything and simply crossed his arms, looking at me, waiting for my response.
I sighed before saying what he wanted to hear, "Please, Matt, open the door for me."
"See, wasn't that hard," he said with a smirk before unlocking the car.
I opened the door and got in.
"Nice accessory," he said judgmentally, referring to my half-empty bottle.
I just gave him a dark look.
"So, what is it this time? Wait, let me guess, he cheated on you again, right?" he said amused.
"Go fuck yourself, Matt," I said, crossing my arms and looking outside.
"It was with who this time, one of your friends again?" he said, chuckling, and I didn't respond.
"No, it's his neighbor, isn't it? He slept with his neighbor? What’s her name again?" he said with that damn smirk.
"Can you please start your fucking car? We're not going to stay here all night, damn it!" I snapped.
"Hmm," he simply hummed, starting the car. "Anyway, I'll end up finding out because you always end up crying in Nick's arms," he said, shrugging.
After that, I didn't want to open my mouth again; he had already annoyed me enough. I just kept my gaze out the window in silence, hoping the journey would pass quickly. And indeed, it was going to pass quickly considering the speed at which he was driving.
"Matt!" I said, gripping the handle of my door when he took a very tight turn at a dangerous speed.
He didn't respond. "You're drunk," I said, looking at him.
"I'm not," he replied without looking at me.
"Yes, you are," I said, frowning.
He didn't respond, so I continued, "You always drive like this when you're drunk."
"Y/n, I told you I was at a party. Yes, I had a drink or two; otherwise, I would never have agreed to come pick you up," he said, scoffing.
"That's bad," I said.
"What, because you're sober right now?" he said, laughing, looking at the bottle on my lap.
"But I'm not driving," I said, raising my voice.
"Can't you be a little grateful for once in your fucking life, y/n," he said, hitting his steering wheel.
I flinched when he did that and stayed speechless, looking at him.
"It's not like you had any other options, did you?" he said, looking at me sharply, then accelerating.
"Matt, you should keep your eyes on the road!" I said, starting to panic.
But for some reason, maybe it was the alcohol, but I couldn't help but find it exciting, this mix of adrenaline and anger. It was like a Molotov cocktail with alcohol added.
"Why, what's wrong?" he said, maintaining his speed, and I looked at him, not knowing what to say.
"Are you scared?" he said, smiling.
"Matt!" I yelled as we narrowly missed a car while passing it.
"Does it scare you?" he continued.
I felt the tears welling up; I was lost, I was scared, but I liked it.
"Answer me, y/n!" he said, accelerating even more, the situation becoming more than dangerous.
"Yes!" I screamed, closing my eyes. "Yes, I'm scared!" I said, feeling a tear run down before opening my eyes again.
"But you love it, look at you, you can't help but watch," he said amusedly.
His eyes slid over my thighs, which were pressed together, and it made him smile.
"You really like this, don't you?" he said, slowing down when we arrived in front of my house.
The adrenaline still hadn't subsided; it was too much for me. I broke down in tears before opening the door and quickly getting out of the car; I felt like I was suffocating.
He stayed in his car for a moment, seeming hesitant, but he eventually turned off the engine and got out.
I immediately started walking towards my house, and he followed me, shouting, "y/n! y/n, stop!"
I didn't listen to him and hurried to grab my keys. "y/n, I'm sorry! Please!" he said, running towards me.
I opened the door, and he reached my side at that moment. "y/n, come on—"
I turned around, and without thinking, I kissed him.
I had been dying to do it.
And even though it killed me to admit it, I had been dying to do it for so long.
He didn't disconnect our lips; on the contrary, he deepened our kiss, leading us into the house backward.
Our tongues battled for dominance for a long moment, our teeth clashing. Without paying attention, my back collided with the wall of my living room, causing me to groan in pain, which allowed him to win our dominance battle and slip his tongue into my mouth.
I quickly forgot the pain when he grabbed my throat with his hand and pressed the lower part of his body against mine.
His lips left mine to place open-mouthed kisses on my jawline while applying pressure on my neck to keep me pinned against the wall.
"I knew you'd like that. I wonder how wet you are right now," he whispered in my ear, making me sigh with pleasure.
It would have been weird if I weren't drunk, I mean, I’m making out in my living room with the guy I like the least on earth, and honestly, it seems even more exciting this way.
"Ouch, fuck!" I moaned when he dug his teeth into my neck to leave his mark.
He reconnected our lips in an even more ravenous kiss after that, and I rushed to remove his clothes, starting with his top.
I slid my hands down his stomach to his belt to remove it. I was about to take off his pants too, but I was caught off guard and distracted when he slid his hand between my legs to feel the wet spot on my panties.
"So fucking wet, I knew it," he said with a smile before starting to massage my clit through my panties.
I moaned and dropped my head against his chest when he slid his hand under my panties to make direct contact with my pussy, making me shiver and grab his arm for support.
He wasted no time inserting two fingers into me and massaging my clit with his thumb.
"Fuck," I whimpered against his chest at all this sudden stimulation.
"Look me in the eyes, y/n," he ordered, but I was so lost in my pleasure that I didn't respond.
He increased the pace and grabbed me by the throat with his free hand this time. "I told you to look me in the eyes when I fuck you with my finger, y/n," he said firmly, and I moaned at the force with which he squeezed my neck and the speed at which his other hand moved between my legs.
"Mmph," I whined, struggling to keep my eyes open, and he seemed to love it judging by the smirk on his lips.
"You're such a slut for letting me do all this to you when you claim to hate me every day," he said, pressing against my ear to degrade me, and it only turned me on even more.
My legs started to weaken, and I felt my orgasm approaching. Without meaning to, I clenched my legs around his hand.
"Keep your fucking legs open, slut," he ordered, tightening his grip around my throat.
"Matt, I'm going to come," I told him, my face contorted with intense pleasure.
"No, you're not," he said, removing his fingers from me and releasing his hold on my throat, causing me to almost fall forward and moan at the lack of stimulation.
I looked at him confused, and he knelt in front of me, slowly removing my panties without breaking eye contact.
He then began kissing the bottom of my thigh, slowly and gently moving up towards my pussy. "I want you to come on my face," he said before burying his head between my legs under my dress.
I gasped in surprise as he did so, gripping onto his hair before letting my head fall back against the wall behind me.
He circled my clit with his lips and immediately started sucking, causing me to cry out in pleasure. I was already extremely close to the edge, but I've always been very sensitive.
"Oh my god," I whispered, placing my hand over my mouth when I realized how loud I was moaning.
And it seemed to amuse him because I felt him chuckle between my legs.
He shook his head between my legs, teasing my sensitive clit with his tongue. Just the sight of his head like that under my dress was enough to push me over the edge.
"Fuck, I'm going to come, Matt, I—oh god," I moaned again, and he slightly lifted my dress to watch me. That was the last straw for me; when I saw his piercing blue eyes, I immediately came on his face, letting out a string of curses and moans.
He then straightened up, and I threw myself at him to kiss him.
He took a step forward, slamming me violently back against the wall, and it would be a lie to say that I didn't love it.
This time, uninterrupted, I ran my hand over his pants to feel him through his jeans.
And he intensified our kiss as I started unbuttoning his jeans and lowering the zipper.
Then I separated our lips, and he looked at me confused.
I looked at him, biting my lip, and began to kneel down, but before my knees could reach the floor, he suddenly grabbed my throat, making me gasp in surprise. "Matt—" I struggled to say because he was squeezing so tightly that I couldn't breathe.
"I can't wait, y/n. I want to feel you around me now," he said, releasing my throat, and I took a breath.
"Do you have a condom?" he asked, moaning as I continued to feel him through his pants.
"No, but... I want it inside..." I said timidly, and he widened his eyes.
"Please, I—" I started to say before he grabbed me by the hips and turned me against the wall, making me sigh in surprise.
"You're going to make me come before you even touch me if you keep that up, baby," he said in my ear, starting to unzip my dress from behind, but it got caught in the seam.
He didn't seem to have much patience because right after that, he ripped my dress off my body, tearing it, and I sighed in surprise at the force of his action.
"Matt!" I said, still facing away from him but turning my head toward him, and I saw him smile.
"Oh, it's okay, darling, I'll buy you another one," he said, slapping my ass and leaving a kiss on my shoulder as he removed his pants and boxers.
He trailed his lips up to my neck, leaving hot kisses, all the while taking his member and rubbing it against my entrance, causing me to let out small moans.
"I'm going to fuck you so well that I promise to make you forget about your ex," he whispered as he gradually inserted his member into me.
My jaw dropped, and my brows immediately furrowed at the burning sensation; he was much larger than Ben, without a doubt. "Ngh—Matt," I moaned when he hit the depth.
"That's right, say my name, get used to screaming it because this definitely won't be the last time I fuck this pretty pussy," he said, groaning in turn before starting to move inside me.
He gripped my hips with his hands, digging his fingers into my skin, and when he began to pick up the pace, I arched even more, hungry to feel him even deeper inside me than he already was.
"Fuck, I knew your pussy would be perfect for me," he said, slapping my ass before thrusting a bit harder.
"God, Matt—Oh—" I cried out as he started hitting that sensitive spot inside me, making me see stars.
He chuckled at my moans before grabbing my hair to pull it and turn my head so I could look at him.
"You look so pretty just like that, all for me," he whispered before kissing me and wrapping his arms around my waist to hold me in place and go even faster.
Our kiss was really messy because he was fucking me so well that I struggled to concentrate and not moan.
"Fuck, I need to see your face!" he said, separating our lips and pulling out abruptly, making me moan at the lack of contact.
Before I could react or understand what was happening, he turned me to face him again before placing his hands behind my thighs to lift me up and insert his cock into me again, and I moaned at the new angle.
"I've never tried this position before; let's see how long we can hold it like this," he said, chuckling before resting my back against the wall behind me.
I chuckled too before wrapping my legs around his hips, and he resumed his pelvic movements, making me roll my eyes and let my head fall back, driven by my pleasure.
He took the opportunity to bury his head in my neck and kiss me, so I lost my hands in his hair, playing with it and pulling on it.
"You smell so fucking good," he whispered against the skin of my neck, and I moaned.
"Matt," I said in a high-pitched moan, and he looked up at me.
"Mh?" he said, continuing to abuse my pussy with his deep thrusts.
"MmmMmmh-" I hummed with my eyes closed, unable to form a coherent sentence due to the overwhelming pleasure engulfing me.
He licked his lips, chuckling, "I'm fucking you dumb, huh?" he said proudly, and I didn't respond, so he started thrusting harder and more brutally.
I opened my eyes, feeling my orgasm approaching, and lowered my head towards him, grabbing his face with both hands. My mouth was open, emitting only sinful moans.
His eyes locked with mine, and he realized what was happening, so he increased the pace even more.
"Matt!" I screamed louder than before.
"Come! I know you want to come for me, y/n!" he said breathlessly. I could feel him twitching inside me; he wasn't far behind.
"F-fuck! Mphh Matt-" I moaned before tightening my pussy around his cock and climaxing, dropping my head forward.
He grabbed my face with one hand to kiss me before he also climaxed after a few more thrusts.
He then rested his head on my shoulder without letting go of the back of my thighs, and I wrapped my arms around his neck.
We were both out of breath.
He gently let my feet touch the ground, and I kept my arms around his neck to support myself.
"Bath?" I asked him, smiling.
"Only if there's a second round," he said, chuckling before kissing me.
★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★
#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo#sturniolo smut#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#best enemies
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I cant do this anymore - George Russell x Wolff! Reader P3
Plot: You are the daughter of Toto Wolff team principle of Mercedes-AMG Petronas, you've worked your whole life to become an engineer. However, your dad has other ideas for you and doesn't want you to become a race engineer. You start to confide more in the Red Bull Racing Team Principle to help you get an engineering job, and see him as your present father figure.
Credit to russellius for the GIF
"You ready for our first Grand Prix together Max?" you ask, testing with Max had gone really well and Christian was happy with the dynamic the both of you had. Max as gentle and kind as he was, he was very ambitious and that ambition when it didn't prevail often turned into anger.
Christian saw, in FP1 and FP2 when he didn't think he was performing that well, you just completely calm Max down and talk him through each component of what he needed to improve. He listened to her on took on board when to conserve his tires, when do take turns wider or more sharply etc. And testing couldn't have gone better for Red Bull.
"You know it, lead me to Victory Y/N" he grinned before hopping into the car. You walk over to your station making sure all of the data on the car is looking as good as it did yesterday in qualifying and to check for any errors that could mess Max up in his first few laps. Nothing stuck out, and you could tell that both the car and Max would perform well today.
"Is Y/N here i need to talk to her before the race" you heard through your headphones, you turn seeing George in his racing suit and helmet in hand talking to some of the mechanics.
"Mate, you are a driver. You should be getting in your car for radio check. You cant be in the Red Bull area okay?" he advises, making George look around quickly before huffing and walking away in dissatisfaction.
"Max, Radio Check can you hear me" you ask and get a response immediately.
"Yes, loud and clear! Today will be good!" he exclaims.
And how true he was, you guided him into P1, it was an amazing start to you helping Max win the Championship, Mexico had been an amazing drive for him. He shared a podium with Lewis and Charles. There were a few cameras that caught you and Lewis looking at each other and you giving him a thumbs up.
Media teams were about to have a field day.
"You are amazing Y/N! You know the car so well I bet YOU could be the driver! Those strategies were insane" Max complimented you as he'd taken his helmet off and pulled you into an insanely sweaty hug of thanks for a great first race.
"Oh god, I'm definitely not driver material! Don't tell anyone, but I don't actually have my drivers license" you cringe giggling at him, it was something you'd never needed. Your mum or dad normally drove you around before uni, and once you were there everything was within walking distance. It had just felt pointless.
"No way, you've got to be lying to me" Max laughs, wondering how you'd survived so long without something like that.
"Honestly George or Lewis used to drive me around a lot, when i had to go to the Mercedes HQ back home he'd take me if my parents couldn't! You say a light smile on your face before it turned sour thinking of the mousy brown haired man that had completely lost any trust you had placed in him.
"Lets not think about them. Lets talk about you coming with me, Christian, Geri, Kelly, Sergio, Hugh and Carola?" he asks and a massive grin comes onto your face.
"I'm invited to the Horner dinner, huh? That sounds kinda important and fancy. I might just have to decline" you joke making Max roll his eyes.
"No, you are joining us and are having fun and getting your mind off Thing one and Thing two" he jokes, you tried to keep a serious face but you really couldn't.
"Anyway, considering the Princess cant drive do you want me to take you back to the hotel?" he asks smiling.
"If that's okay with you!" you smile happily, he nods slinging an arm around your shoulder guiding you to the car.
"So when do I finally get to meet P!" you exclaim, even though you'd only been working with Max for a week, you'd gotten to know him very well. You had to considering he had to trust listening to you while he was driving round a track a 200 miles an hour.
"Hmmmm I think Kelly said she'd be bringing her to the race next week. It's Brazil so its an important one for her!" he admits. The conversation flew between you and Max, it was strange really it felt like you'd been friends with him for ages. You had to grovel when it came to any of the Mercedes Drivers in the past, so this easiness to making friends felt good.
That was one thing you'd struggled with. You had a love for F1 straight away considering who you parents were and where you were constantly travelling from race to race until you got to university age. So you didn't actually have many friends who stuck around.
You both eventually ended up at the hotel, you waved at Kelly who was waiting for the both of you and she pulled you into a big hug as she walked over to you.
"You both did amazing today! So proud of you! Y/N, did Max end up inviting you to dinner tonight!" she exclaims, wanting you to be there as well.
"Yes, I'll be there" you smile and say your goodbye's before dashing into your room to get ready for the dinner.
You struggled on what to wear and ended up calling Max to get Kelly to help you on what the dinner vibe was for tonight. You ended up showing her half the stuff you'd brought to Mexico with you and ended up picking one of your nicer dresses from Versace.
You took some pictures before a knock was heard at your door that had you confused as you were meeting up with Kelly and Max outside theirs in 30 minutes.
You opened the door, and looked up to see who had come to the door.
"Omg" you both said at the same time, you tried to slam the door shit. George wouldn't ruin your night, he didn't deserve too.
However, a foot and arm in the door and his general athletic body that made him stronger than you prevented all of that. He practically barged his way in.
You both stood there in awkward silence. George couldn't get over how beautiful you looked. I mean, you were always beautiful to him. But tonight in the black dress that he swore Donatella had personalized just for you, and the way your hair fell around you face in an effortless fashion. He couldn't look away from you.
"If you've come here to accuse me some more, then just leave. I'm about to have a really good night with friends, people who actually care for me and want me to succeed and if I'm being honest I do not need your negativity" you say, turning around to check yourself in the mirror.
"You look gorgeous tonight. So i wont do this tonight, but please meet me in between the Mercedes and Williams garage next week in Brazil. We need to talk. We've been friends for years and I don't want my stupidity to come between us" he says, stepping towards you going to reach out his hand. You step back, it took a lot especially with this ocean blue puppy eyes looking at you with that sad expression that would make anyone fold.
"Please, After Qually, I'm only asking for five minutes Y/N please" he begs trying to catch your eyes but you were doing your best not to look at them too often, knowing you would probably cave.
"I'll think about it. If I'm there we can talk, if not then its up to you if our friendship is really worth waiting for" you admit, walking to the door and opening it up for him as a sign that he should leave.
"I've waited long enough" he mumbles before walking out the door himself and leaving towards the lift that was down the corridor from your room.
The night had gone so well, you were really beginning to feel comfortable around those in Red Bull. The people at the table were being so kind to you as the newbie, Christian pouring you the water, recommending you dishes he liked whilst arguing with the actual Mexican in the room who knew the cuisine of the restaurant like the back of his hand, to offering you the salt and proceeding to do it for you had your heart melting.
It was stupid, really. You shouldn't be this emotional over an older man doing small silly little tasks that you could tackle alone but just was nice to have the offered help. Help that you hadn't received in recent years.
"I really want to thank you all for tonight, its been really nice to hang out with you. And i cant wait for a double podium in Brazil next week!" you exclaim clinking you glass with everyone around the table.
However, George still managed to creep into your mind thanks to his earlier disturbance.
Would he actually apologise?
Taglist:
@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @urdad-hot
Hey guys, so i've noticed some people in the taglist aren't getting tagged, I'm not sure if this is username changes or what... but i will start to take of one that don't link to an actual page, so if you see your account name and its not working please feel free to message me, or comment her or on my masterlist of taglist so i can see your knew username!
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1#formula one#formula one fanfiction#george russel imagine#george russel x reader#george russell imagine#george russell
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The Doll House - A Toji x Reader Fanfic Part 1
You’re in love with Toji, even after finding out he trains sex dolls at the Doll House. Taking a chance, you sell yourself to the Doll House so he can be your trainer, and you bet him that you can make him fall for you by the end of the training.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Read Geto’s Part Here!
Read Nanami’s Part Here!
Read Sukuna’s Part Here!
Read Gojo’s Part Here!
Read Choso’s Part Here!
On the outskirts of town, there stands a particular shop called the “Doll House”. Inside its walls you can find a “doll” to match any taste you might have. All your desires will be fulfilled, no matter how depraved. Satisfaction is guaranteed! The dolls are exceptionally high quality, thanks to the skillful trainers who work with them twenty-four hours a day, molding them into perfect toys for your enjoyment.
Each trainer has a specialty that they focus on, and they all take great pride in their work. Their methods differ greatly, their approaches vary, but they all follow one rule: never get attached to a doll. After the training is complete, they hand the dolls over to their new owners, and never see them again. However, just once over the course of their careers, trainers are allowed to pick a doll they’ve personally trained and keep her as their own.
AU! Each trainer will get their own story! This is Toji’s. I’m not sure how many parts it will have. If you’d like to be tagged in future parts, let me know! You must be an adult to be tagged! Any feedback whatsoever is adored! I’m keeping the same tag list as Geto’s part. If you’d like to be removed, please let me know!
Note: Consider these parts AU’s within an AU. So you might see Geto with a different doll from the reader in his part, but just consider this an alternate timeline lol.
Smut. 18+. Short Fem Reader. Cock drunk reader. Age difference (Reader is 20, Toji is 38). Size difference kink. Oral sex. Fingering. Use of aphrodisiacs. Divider by @benkeibear!
You’ll never forget the day you met Fushiguro Toji. It was your first day at your first job, straight out of high school. A job you still have now, over two years later: working the register at a convenience store in town.
That day, you were still being taught the ropes by a friendly older co-worker. You heard the bell on the door signaling a customer was walking in, and you turned to give them the practiced greeting. What you found was the biggest, tallest, hottest man you’d ever seen in your life. He was quite a bit older than you, with a scar on the corner of his mouth, but he was absolutely ripped and had lovely green eyes. He was wearing simple clothes, sweatpants and a T-shirt that clung a little too tightly to his muscular form.
At first glance, he was intimidating. He had a dangerous aura to him, and you remember thinking that he could rob the place and not even need a weapon. You glanced at your co-worker, who smiled and whispered, “I know he’s kinda scary, but he’s a regular. Don’t worry.”
You watched the man grab a few snacks and a pack of beer, then bring them to the counter. When he was standing right in front of you, his imposing height was even more noticeable. Especially considering your short stature.
As you nervously rang up his items, you looked up at him and said, “May I please see your ID?”
You felt silly asking this man for ID to buy beer when he was obviously much older than you, but your co-worker was watching your performance on your first day. You’d been told to always ask for ID, no matter what, when selling alcohol.
The man didn’t seem offended, thank goodness. He pulled out a wallet and then a drivers license. You stared at it, trying to glean as much information as you could without being weird about it. His name was Fushiguro Toji. Thirty-six years old. Shit, he was old enough to be your dad, exactly twice your age at the time.
But you’d smiled and thanked him, saying the usual, “Have a nice night!”
He smiled back and said, “You too!” as he walked out the door. And you were a goner.
Over the next few months, Toji came into the store often, at least three or four times a week. You’d finally gotten comfortable enough to start making small talk with him, and a few times he even lingered after paying for his items, just chatting with you.
There was nothing romantic or even flirty about his attitude towards you. He probably thought you were too young for him. But by this point you were nursing a pretty major crush. There was something about his casual, easy-going attitude that contrasted with his huge size and the intimidating, dangerous vibes he emitted. It drove you wild.
Everything changed one night, nearly a year after you started working at the convenience store. You were working alone on a slow night when a man dressed in dark colors, a hood pulled up over his hair, walked in. He lurked in the store for a bit, browsing the magazine rack and then the beverages. When he finally brought a few items up to the counter, you began ringing them up.
All at once, out of nowhere, there was a large knife pointing at your throat. The man was holding it steadily in his hand as he said, “Empty the register!”
By reflex, you held your hands up in a motion of surrender. “Please, sir, don’t hurt me! I’m just-“
“Empty the fucking register or I’ll stab you in the fucking face!”
With trembling hands, you opened the register and began placing the stacks of money on the counter. Your heart was pounding rapidly, sweat beginning to bead on your forehead, tears threatening to leak from your eyes. You’d never been more terrified in your life.
There was a button on the underside of the counter that would trigger an alarm system when pressed, but the man was watching your hands intently. You didn’t dare do anything to anger him. Even so, when you were almost finished emptying the register, he suddenly jabbed the knife in your direction, almost stabbing you in the cheek.
“You pushed the button, didn’t you?!” he demanded, his eyes wild.
“No! I never touched it! I swear!”
He raised the knife, preparing to slash down at you, but he froze mid swing when the bell on the door jangled. Both of you looked toward the door, only to see Toji walking inside.
You didn’t know whether to feel relieved or worried. Toji looked strong, but he was unarmed. You didn’t want him to be hurt.
Toji looked at you, at your frightened face, your hands in front of you in a defensive position, then at the man holding the knife. The situation must have been clear, because Toji’s expression darkened as he stepped toward the counter.
The man turned his whole body around to face Toji, the knife now pointed away from you. “Stay back!” the man yelled. There was a tinge of fear in his voice.
“Are you making trouble in my favorite store? For my favorite cashier?” Toji asked, walking at a leisurely pace. “I can’t let that slide.”
Toji disappeared. That’s the only way you could describe it. He moved so fast that it looked like he disappeared and then reappeared right in front of the man, wrenching the knife free and sending it clattering across the floor. Then, in another instant, the man was on his back on the floor, Toji on top of him, giving him a savage beating.
You watched the scene with a mixture of awe and fear. Toji was grinning as he repeatedly punched the man in the face, blood and even a couple of teeth flying through the air. It was brutal, it was violent… it was insanely hot.
When the man stopped moving, seemingly unconscious, Toji stood up and approached the counter. “Are you alright?”
You looked up at him, tears in your eyes. You looked down at your own hands and realized they were still shaking. In one fluid motion, Toji jumped over the counter and stood next to you. “Hey, are you hurt? Did he cut you?”
You shook your head, but you couldn’t seem to speak. Instead, you threw yourself into his arms. He patted your back. “It’s okay. You’re okay. I took care of him for you,” he said in a voice far softer than you’d ever heard from him.
He ended up staying with you until the police arrived, and that’s the night your crush on him ended. From that night on, you were in love with him.
It would be several months after that when you confided in your friendly coworker about your feelings. She looked at you in shock and said, “Oh honey, don’t you know what he does for a living?” When you said no, she gave you a pitying look before saying, “He works as a trainer at the Doll House.”
That came as a huge surprise to you, and also felt like a knife to your heart. So he spent his days having sex with beautiful women. No wonder he never flirted with you, or seemed to notice at all when you made clumsy attempts to flirt with him.
But it was too late. You were already in love, and finding out you had even less of a chance with him than you already thought did nothing to dampen your passion. You found yourself fantasizing about being a doll he was training, about being pinned down by his muscular body and fucked all night long.
You’d only had one boyfriend, back in high school. The few times you’d slept with him had been unsatisfying and underwhelming. In fact you’d barely felt him when he was inside you. It left you wondering what sex would feel like with a guy who knew what he was doing, or a guy big enough to make sure you felt him. Toji was certainly a big guy. So you dreamed about him taking you in his bed, bending you over a table, even about him coming into the store and lifting you onto the counter so you’d be high enough for him to fuck you without bending too far.
Now, exactly two years after meeting him, your desire for him is at an all time high. You want him. All of him. You want him physically, of course, but you want him emotionally as well. You want to spend hours talking to him, because your chats in the store just aren’t enough. You want to meet his family, find out what his favorite books and movies are, to cook dinner with him, to just… know him.
And so, without consulting anyone who might talk some sense into you, you decide to do something totally reckless and probably stupid.
You’ve paid such close attention to Toji’s buying habits that you’ve figured out his patterns. Every six weeks, like clockwork, he buys a pack of beer and extra snacks. Otherwise he avoids alcohol and only buys a few items. Your guess, considering the timing, is that he buys these items when he’s finished training a doll, almost like a reward to himself for a job well done.
He came in early today and bought the “magic items” as you call them. Which means his doll’s training is complete as of today. Which means he’s available as a trainer.
After he leaves, you take off early from work and head over to the Doll House. You park on the street and watch as Toji’s car pulls around to the back, then you see him walking toward the front door.
This is your only chance! If you don’t act now, you’ll have to wait another six weeks, and you don’t think you can do that.
Steeling your resolve, you get out of your car and hurry over to stop Toji before he goes inside.
“Excuse me, Toji?”
He stops and turns to face you, a flicker of
surprise on his face. “Hey, what are you doing here?” he asks, his tone friendly.
You hesitate. You had this all planned out, but standing right here in front of him is making you more nervous than you expected. He’s looking at you curiously, probably wondering why the hell you followed him to his job. In a panic, you just blurt out what you want to say.
“I’m in love with you!”
“Oh, uh, thanks,” he says. “I’m flattered, but-“
“And I want to be your doll!”
His face seems to freeze. “Huh?”
Your own face is burning with embarrassment, but you’ve come this far. You can’t back out now. “I want to sell myself to the Doll House, if you’ll agree to be my trainer!”
He leans forward and looks at you closely, then asks, “How old are you?”
“I’m twenty,” you answer.
He sighs and scratches the back of his head. “Go home. This is no place for you.”
You stare up at him, not backing down. “I’m serious about this. I want you to train me.”
His eyes sweep over you, down and back up. It feels like the first time he’s ever looked at you as a woman. “Look, if you want me to fuck you that badly, I can take you out back and rail you in my car. But you don’t wanna be a doll. Trust me.”
It’s tempting to take him up on that offer. But you can’t let yourself get distracted now. “I don’t just want sex. I mean I want that too but… I’m really in love with you! I want your heart too. If you have no interest in me at all, just say so and I’ll drop it. But if you’re attracted to me, even a tiny bit, let me be your doll!”
**********************
Toji looks down at the girl in front of him, wondering what he did or said to make her feel this way. He’s always thought of her as the cute, cheery little cashier who always greeted him with a bright smile. And that’s pretty much it. He assumed she was younger than she is, probably because she’s so damn short, so it really never occurred to him to think of her in a sexual way.
But looking at her now, knowing she’s an adult, he thinks she’s quite pretty. Still, she must be naive, or have really bad judgement, if she fell in love with someone like him. And wanting to be a doll? Did she even understand what that meant?
“It’s a ten year contract,” he tells her. “You’re signing away ten years of your life when you become a doll.”
“I know that.”
“You’re basically a sex slave. You have to do all kinds of filthy stuff, whether you want to or not.”
She nods. “I understand.”
Toji thinks she definitely doesn’t understand. She practically has hearts in her eyes. Shit, she’s actually in love with him!
Well, time to give her a wake up call.
He steps closer, looming over her, exuding a threatening aura. “My training isn’t romantic. It’s not about love,” he tells her in a serious tone, “it’s about fucking you all day and all night until you’re so cock drunk, the only thing you can think about is cock. You’ll feel empty when my dick isn’t buried in your pussy. You’ll feel hungry when you’re not drinking my cum. And even if you’re sore and exhausted, I won’t stop. There’s no breaks in my training. Love will be the last thing on your mind, because by the end of it, you’ll want any cock that’s available, no matter who it belongs to.”
She stares up at him. He expected her to cry and run away, or at least look frightened. But she has a strangely blank expression as she asks, “Are you trying to scare me away?”
He narrows his eyes. “Is it working?”
She smiles. “Nope. I know how I feel. I might get addicted to you, but I’ll never want anyone else!”
He sighs again. “See, that’s another reason I can’t do it. As trainers we’re not supposed to let dolls get attached to us. You’re already attached. How are you gonna feel when I hand you over to some random guy, and you’re stuck with him for ten years?”
She doesn’t falter even then. Instead she says, “I heard a rumor that trainers can keep a doll they’ve trained.”
Oh. So that’s her plan. “Yeah, I can keep exactly one. Not to be rude, because you’re cute and all, but what makes you think I’ll pick you as the one and only doll I can keep?”
She looks him straight in the eyes. “I’m willing to bet on my love. It’s a gamble I can take, because the reward will be worth it.”
He chuckles. “Ten years with me is a reward? You’re delusional.”
“Maybe so. But it doesn’t change how I feel. I bet you’ll fall in love with me before the training is over!”
He laughs and bends over slightly to face her. “And I bet I can turn you into a cock drunk slut who doesn’t care about love.”
Her eyes light up. “So you’ll be my trainer?”
Shit. He got caught up in the moment. He never could resist a bet. “If we do this, you can’t complain. I’m not gonna go easy on you just because I know you from the convenience store. You can’t pull the shy virgin card. I’m gonna be fucking your brains out constantly, filling every hole you have.”
Her face reddens, but there’s excitement in her love struck eyes. “I’m not a virgin,” she says, “and I might be a little shy at first but I’ll get over it.” Then she meets his gaze again. “You’re all I’ve thought about for two years. I want you to wreck me!”
His eyes widen. She’s cuter than he realized. She’s so small framed, he could snap her in half like a twig, but she’s determined and strong willed. He’s starting to look forward to splitting her open on his cock.
“Okay, if you’re sure about this, come inside and sign the contract,” he says.
******************
The inside of the Doll House is, oddly, almost exactly how you imagined it would be. Everything looked opulent and classy, the furnishings all expensive, the colors all rich. The smell of some sort of perfume fills the air, making you slightly dizzy as you follow Toji inside.
“Wait here, I’ll get the owner,” he says, disappearing into a dark hallway. When he returns a few minutes later, a beautiful woman with silver hair is with him, holding a contract.
“Read this very carefully,” she says, “then sign if you agree to the terms.”
Despite your reckless plan, you still take the time to read over the contract. Everything sounds fair, so you take a pen from the nearby counter and sign on the dotted line. Toji watches with an unreadable expression.
Once you’ve signed, Toji leads you further into the house, down a hall, and to a door. “This is my room,” he says, opening the door and motioning you in. “You’ll spend most of your time in here, but you’re not confined. You can wander the house if you want.”
Walking into his room, you feel a bit overwhelmed. It’s fancy, like the rest of the house, but there’s enough personal touches for you to see his personality. There’s a large punching bag hanging from the ceiling in the corner, a mini fridge sitting on a cheap-looking metal stand beside a large TV. The bed is made, surprisingly, but it still looks a little sloppy. There’s laundry scattered here and there on the floor.
“You can send for some clothes and stuff later. You won’t need much thought,” he tells you, tossing some clothes out of a nearby chair. “Here, have a seat.”
You walk over and sit down in the offered chair. Toji leans against the dresser and begins explaining the rules.
“As a doll under my training, you have to do whatever I say, no matter what it is. If you don’t, you’re breaking the contract. I don’t do freaky shit like punishments or collars or whatever. You’ll see plenty of that with the other trainers. If you don’t follow my orders, I’ll just send you home and you’ll get sued.”
You nod. That all seems simple enough.
Toji goes to the mini fridge and opens it, then comes toward you with a small bottle of liquid. “Drink this,” he says.
You look at the bottle without touching it. “What is it?”
“It’s an aphrodisiac. It helps with the training.”
“Oh, I don’t think I need that,” you say.
Toji frowns. “You wanted me to train you, so listen to your trainer. Drink it.”
You take the bottle from him and pull off the lid. After giving the liquid inside a quick sniff, you shrug and down the whole bottle, then give him back the now empty container.
“How long does it take to work?” you ask.
He gives you a grin. “Just a few minutes. You’ll know it when you feel it.”
“Okay,” you reply, trying to act cool when you’re about to burst from excitement. The man you’re madly in love with, that you’ve been thinking about nonstop for two years, is going to touch you, kiss you, have sex with you! You want to squeal! But mixed in with the excitement is a little bit of nervousness. What if you can’t satisfy him? What if he’s too rough?
He’s back to leaning against the dresser, one ankle crossed over the other, casual slide-on sandals on his feet. He’s wearing baggy sweatpants and a form fitting T-shirt, his standard look. God, he looks good. You can’t wait to have those big strong hands on you, sliding over your body, pinning your arms above your head, squeezing your-
Wait. Is the aphrodisiac already working? You were already thirsty for him but suddenly you feel like tackling him to the floor. Your body feels hot, like you’re running a fever. Your breathing has quickened. You look up to find Toji grinning at you. It’s a smug, knowing grin. He knows exactly what’s happening.
He pushes away from the dresser and casually strolls over to you. “Sure you’re ready for this?” he asks as he stands over you.
You gulp as you look up at him, probably looking the same way a mouse does before a hungry hawk. “Y-yeah! I’m totally ready!”
He kneels down in front of your chair, placing one hand on each of your thighs, and then moving them up, dragging your skirt with them. Your breath catches in your throat when your skirt is hiked up around your waist, revealing your blue and white striped panties. He locks eyes with you as he hooks his fingers into the waistband and slowly pulls your panties down, sliding them under your ass and all the way off your ankles.
His hands are firm as they push your legs up and apart, leaving them to hang over each arm of the chair, spreading you open. His eyes flick up to your face once more before he dives in, burying his face in your wet pussy. His tongue goes straight to work, teasing your clit by drawing circles around it while two of his fingers slide inside you. You’re so slick with arousal that they slip right in despite their size, then pump in and out as his lips close around your sensitive nub, sucking hard enough to pull on it, making your body jolt.
“Oh God!” you moan, your back arching in the chair, your head tossed back. Toji’s lips release you, his tongue now lapping at the juices leaking out of you as his fingers continue moving. You’ve never felt such intense stimulation in your life. And to think… the man you’re crazy about is doing this to you! It’s euphoric.
You lose track of time as Toji eats you out in the chair. You eats your pussy like he’s a starving man, and you can only quiver and squirm in pleasure, moaning and gasping.
“Ahhh… Toji!” you scream out when you feel his teeth lightly graze your clit. Then it’s his tongue again, then his lips, and finally your body can’t take any more pleasure. You cum with a loud cry of his name, and you look down just in time to see fluid squirting out of you, most of it hitting Toji right in the face.
He pulls back, licking his lips and using the collar of his shirt to wipe his face. He laughs and says, “Didn’t know you were a squirter!”
You blush crimson. “I’ve never done that before! I’m sorry it got all over you.”
“Are you kidding? I love squirters! Lets me know I’m doing a good job. You can spray my face anytime.”
Before you can respond to that, Toji stands up and then scoops you into his arms. You feel weightless when held by his massive strength as he carries you to the bed and lies you on your back.
With expert motions, he pulls your shirt up your body and over your head, tossing it to the floor where it blends in with the rest of the laundry, then slides your skirt down and off, leaving you completely bare.
Then, he begins undressing himself. You watch breathlessly as he takes his shirt off, revealing his muscled chest. God, he’s gorgeous. He wears a smirk as he shoves his pants down, watching your eyes bulge at the sight of his humongous cock. Oh, you’re definitely going to feel that! If he can even get that tower of a dick to fit.
Maybe it’s the aphrodisiac, or maybe it’s the fact that you love him, but you’re not scared at all. You just want him inside you, even if he has to tear you apart. So when he climbs onto the bed and pushes your legs up, folding you in half, you’re ecstatic. Even when you feel his tip at your soaking wet entrance, even when his heavy body presses down on you, effectively pinning you to the bed, it doesn’t even occur to you to panic. You look up at him lovingly, waiting for your fantasies to finally come to life.
He shoves into you, all the way in on the first thrust, stretching you impossibly wide and deep. It takes your breath away, your hands gripping his broad shoulders. It feels like he just penetrated your womb, even if you know that’s physically impossible. There’s a dull, throbbing ache inside you, but it’s a feeling you welcome. Because you’re stuffed so completely full of the man you love.
After giving you a few moments to accommodate his size, he begins pumping into you, slowly at first but quickly picking up speed. With every thrust, you gasp, your fingers digging into his skin. It hurts and it feels great at the same time. “T-Toji…”
You look up at him, and he’s looking back
at you with heated eyes. “Fuck, you’re tight! Holy shit!” he mutters, thrusting even harder, rocking your whole body against the bed.
“Ahhh… Toji…. it’s so deep!”
You hear him chuckle, then he leans down, putting his mouth close to your ear as he says, “Baby, I’m only halfway in.”
“What?!” you gaze up at him in shock. “But I thought…”
He grins. “You thought this was it? I’m insulted.” He laughs, patting your head. “You’re adorable. But I think this is all you can handle right now. I’m not into hurting dolls.”
“M-more…” you murmur.
“Huh?”
“I want more of you! I want all of you!” The words burst from your mouth in a cry as your arms wrap around him. “I don’t care if it hurts! I lo-“
He cuts off your cries with a kiss, his lips smothering your own, his tongue in your mouth. When he pulls away, you’re left panting.
“There’s plenty of time for that, trust me,” he says, his voice low. “This tight little pussy is gonna get every inch of me. But right now, this is your limit.”
As if to punctuate his words, he gives a hard thrust, making you moan and tighten your grip on his neck. He’s too much, but it’s still not enough for you. You want everything he has, but you agreed to listen to him as your trainer, so you drop the issue and let yourself enjoy the feeling of him inside your body, his toned abdomen scraping across you, the smell of his cologne drifting around the room.
You didn’t think you could fall anymore deeply in love with him, but you have.
********************
Toji wants nothing more than to plow his entire length into his new doll’s tiny, drenched pussy, and she’s practically begging for it, but he was telling the truth when he said he didn’t like hurting dolls. He wasn’t like Sukuna, who got off on inflicting pain. Toji could enjoy giving some asshole a beating, but he’d never understood the appeal of hurting a lover.
The girl currently writhing in ecstasy beneath him was so small in stature, and a bit younger than the dolls he usually trained. He was aware of his own size, of his unusual strength, and so he had to be careful with dolls like her. He didn’t want to break her.
As he fucks her, he kisses her again, on her lips, her neck, her breasts, tasting her sweet skin. He slides one hand down between their bodies and finds her clit with his thumb, making her tremble and cry out his name again.
He looks down at her blissed out face. She’s staring at him so longingly, her face flushed with pleasure, her lips parted and wet with his own saliva, he feels his jaded heart skip a beat.
Does she actually love him? Or has she just convinced herself that she does? Either way, it doesn’t matter. Within a couple of weeks she’ll be turning those pretty, loving eyes on anything with a cock.
As for Toji, he will never fall in love with her. He tried love once, long ago, and it only brought him misery. Much easier to have fun fucking dolls and then send them on their way.
The doll cries out loudly, her body shaking under him as she cums, her arms clinging to him. “Toji… I love you…” she says, barely conscious.
She really is cute, he thinks, and tight as fuck. He thrusts into her for a few more minutes as she rides out her orgasm, then pulls out of her. His cum shoots out onto her prone body, coating her tits. Her eyes flutter open and she looks down, touching the sticky fluid with her fingers. She looks disappointed.
“You didn’t cum inside me?” Her voice is weak, almost sad. It makes him want to fill her with his seed until it’s pouring out of her.
“Not until you get on birth control,” he tells her. It’s something all dolls are expected to do. No one wants to deal with a pregnancy, least of all Toji. One brat is enough for him.
He gives her a few minutes to catch her breath, then reaches down and rolls her onto her stomach. “Time for round two,” he whispers into her ear.
She turns her head suddenly to look back at him. “Right now?!”
He points down at his still fully hard cock. “I took one of those aphrodisiacs myself. I can go for hours! I told you, you don’t get breaks in my training.”
There’s a flicker of panic on her face, but it’s quickly replaced by excitement. She draws up her knees and lifts her hips. “Okay. Maybe you can put it all the way in this time?”
His eyes shimmer as he says, “Fuck, you’re already hungry for my cock, aren’t you?”
She blushes but smiles at him. “Well, that, and I just love you so much. I want to feel all of you, everything about you.”
He looks away from her face, focusing on the sexy little ass sticking up in the air. “That’s good for you, then. Cause we’re just getting started.”
Tag List:
@suguguro @kaedear @onyxsphynx @poopoobuttsy @butterskyy @collectionofdolls @akaotv @witchbybirth @bloofinntoona @wasurenagusaa @tclbts @tojirin @lucyrocks86 @badbyeyoongi @97britt @aydene @lzaj19
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Some spicy Theodore Nott headcanons˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚
Notes: this was like driving: I don't have a driver license. Seriously like, you absolutely hyped me up for writing this and now I feel like I need to go touch some grass and drink some holy water.
Btw we shouldn't feel ashamed, like the first people ever to write in a language that is more similar to ours, literally wrote about about two nun fuck1ng him 108 times (yes that's what he says) in a week bc they thought he was mute. Like women in the 700 were DYING bc of novels, bc they couldn't never have enough of it and the majority developed a masturbat1on add1ction. We can't be worse, that's just humanity at its core: we are h0rny creatures.
⚠️: The blue parts are from a poem, from the author Giacomo da Lentini and it's called "Meravigliosamente" (| put a translation at the end, because it's ancient Italian and you can't translate it with a normal translator). It's one of my favorites poems ever, it's one the best incarnation of what love feels like. Yeah now the poets are cursing at me from above.
Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! 18+!!Breeding k1nk, p in v, ora1 f receiving, pregnant! reader description, nak3d people in general (idk what to put, BUT YOU HAVE BEEN ADVISED). English is not my first language, therefore you could find some mistakes, please report them to me!
With all being said: enjoy<3
—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—
Theodore Nott, your Italian Slytherin guy:
Theo loves to love as we already established.
He loves to give, he would let his blood dry for you.
Therefore he likes to take care of his dear ones, especially you, il suo tesoro.
I also already told you about how he will think about your future together, how he would love to have a proper family with you.
He just wants to have what his family wasn't capable of giving him.
So when the seventh year it's over, it also means that his only obstacle, the one that used to keep him away from his dream, is also over.
Something changes inside of him, un istinto primario prende il sopravvento. He knows that now it is actually possible.
«Meravigliosamente
un amor mi distringe
e soven ad ogn'ora.»
Maybe the first few months it wouldn't be so evident, he would probably keep it for himself.
He wouldn't like to put pressure on you, he couldn't.
But every time you get intimate, tutte le volte che fate l'amore, he can't help but think what it will feel like letting himself go completely.
Letting it happen.
Letting himself have a proper release.
Letting himself paint your inside white.
His warm finding the embrace of your core.
Planting a life, creating it with il suo tesoro, la sua diletta.
That's the ultimate dream e cazzo quanto lo vorrebbe.
«Com'omo che ten mente
in altro exemplo pinge
la simile pintura,
cosi, bella, facc'eo,
che’nfra lo core meo
porto la tua figura.»
But for now he still has to curse within himself, "cazzo, cazzo, cazzo.", imprisoning that release, that dream.
Simply wishing he could stay inside, saving every drop for you.
It's so hard for him to distract himself from the heavy daydreaming.
His mind as pregnant with thoughts as he wish you were.
You would just look so gorgeous round with his child.
And he would easily do everything under the sight of your new silhouette.
(As he wasn't already totally lost in this love, this passion per la sua bella)
This particular scene keeps repeating in his cursed mind:
You, full and completely bare before him sitting on your shared bed, nonchalantly putting cream on every inch of your skin after a shower.
He might be at the doorstep looking from afar or already on the bed
But it always ends with him interrupting you, taking your hands with devotion, already giving you passions with just his eyes, just for him to say: "dimmi quello che desideri e sarà tuo"
And he would literally do anything.
«Al cor m'ard'una doglia,
com'om che te lo foco
a lo suo seno ascoso,
e quanto più lo'nvoglia,
tanto arde più loco
e non po star incluso»
He would let you exploit his tongue in favor of your pleasure, savoring every drop coming from down there.
Growling just at your moist sight
And he would taste you like a starved man.
Over and over again.
On the bed,
On the Couch,
At the dinner table.
Sempre e ovunque.
Holding you still with one of his firm hands on your now round stomach.
Non è mai stato così facile inginocchiarsi e predicare da quando la sua religione, la sua donna angelo, sei diventata tu.
You look like a miracle to him.
And he would absolutely get lost in this strong trance filled with amore, passione e lussuria.
He would delicately lay your figure on the bed, like the most precious Greek statue of a goddess.
But the softness of your skin will make him realize that you are not a vision, but his blessed reality.
Your fullness getting in the way would quickly become the most delicious sight ever in his eyes.
His dead stare penetrating your soul along with his physical body.
He would tell you that his eyes look gone because he is convinced to be already dead and already in Paradise.
So lost in the haze, so convinced of the woman under him to be an angel.
And now, he is making her la madre dei suoi figli, sua moglie, la sua fiamma, da qui all'eternità.
Your legs, now afar from each other, looking like the most rare prophecy.
The softness of your skin feeling like the salvation from every sin.
Your swollen breast moving along his movements in you, rhythmically, like a fine melody.
And if by chance a single tear of your product falls from them, his eyes would shine like the sun during August.
He won't esitate to collect it with his mouth, tasting yet another one of your miracles. He wouldn't hold back the raw attitude taking over his mind, he simply couldn't.
«Assai v'aggio laudato,
madonna, in tutte parti
di bellezze ch'avete.»
When you two got together he thought he couldn't love you more, the same on your wedding day, but now he would simply let this love tear him apart he would still and always pray in your name.
In the morning he would wake you up gently, caressing you cheeks, watching as the eyes that caught his soul slowly open.
He would prepare breakfast for you, taking it directly in bed.
And every day will only be about you and you only.
Need a bath? Already prepped and warm amore.
You have swollen feet? A massage from him is mandatory.
Need to put the nursery together? Consider it done.
And don't get me started on the amount of stuff that he would buy for your unborn child.
He just wants to make sure everything will be ready for the big day.
But that's just a dream, playing tricks with his mind.
«Canzonetta novella,
va canta nova cosa;
lèvati da maitino
davanti a la più bella,
fiore d'ogn'amorosa,
bionda più ch'auro fino»
"Theo, darling, are you still here?" you ask him after two solid minutes of him staring at you, to the point that you were starting to feel suffocated by his gaze.
His pupils blown, and as his breathing increase, he finally snaps back from daydreaming.
But now, now it's been months of this agony, della sua mente completamente offuscata dal desiderio.
He just can't help himself anymore, he is a direct and honest person, he can't continue to keep this away from you.
And with the most serious expression known to mankind and his eyes firmly buried into yours, he doesn't hesitate anymore:
"Facciamo un figlio amore, facciamolo adesso, non ne posso più d'aspettare, non posso più nemmeno aspettare che er mondo faccia n'altro giro" he would tell you in one breath.
You kiss him delicately, "Allora non esitare, non aspettare che la luna fugga Mr.Nott"
"Ai suoi ordini Signora Nott"
"Ti amo tantissimo" the last thing he would tell you before finally letting himself completely go, completamente perso in questo amore, si che possa ammirare te, te sospirare e te amare, te soltanto.
—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—
Okay so here's the translation of the poem, the canzonetta, which as I said it's called "Meravigliosamente", in English “Wonderfully":
My ask box is open!✨🥂
<- part II
-> part III?
#theodore nott headcanons#my headcanons#my gif#Theodore nott x reader#theodore nott x you#theodore nott x y/n#Slytherin#Harry Potter fandom#theo nott x reader#Theo nott x you#theo nott x y/n#breeding k1nk#theodore nott smut#theodore nott scenarios#preggo kink#Theodore nott x pregnant!reader#slytherin boys#slytherin boys x reader#harry potter headcanon#fem reader#slytherin friend group#smut#italian literature#poetry#slytherin boys x you#theodore nott#pregnancy k1nk#Theodore nott aesthetic#new Roman Empire unlocked#dark academia
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Spoiling you
JJ Maybank x kardashian rich! reader (reader is female with she/her pronouns)
warnings: jj being made fun of (jokingly),cursing, established relationship, kissing, Y/N being a triggering type of rich LIKE WHAT YOU MEAN 500,000 DOLLARS IS CHEAP, just cute fluff
outer banks masterlist
Summary: Y/N loves spoiling JJ
posted: January 9,2024
When Y/n the richest girl on the island and JJ the poorest guy on the island got together everybody thought they were doing some big dumb joke. But it was definitely real.
JJ’s friends always make fun of him for it of course jokes only. Y/n’s friends always say she can find better but she is never budging.
Only downside for JJ is that Y/n’s love language is giving gifts and she loves spoiling him. He always says how it’s not needed but she doesn’t care. One time he came to hang out with the newest phone, even Kie didn’t have it yet.
“Woahhh new phone Jay?” John b says seeing the phone. “Fuck off alright yes I have a new phone.”
“Y/n got it for you?” Pope asked. “Of course she got it for me. I told her I didn’t need this but she got it anyway.”
“I think it’s sweet that she gives you stuff for no reason.” Kie said playing with the phone.
Of course JJ loved the phone but he just likes earning things instead of it being handed to him.
______
“Ok close your eyes!” Y/n said while looking for his gift. “Y/n I swear if it’s something big-.”
“Shut up! Ok hold out your hands.” He did and he felt a box in his hand. “Ok open!” And he did.
It was a watch and not any watch,
a fucking Rolex. The newest model at that.
“Y/n what the fuck! This is like a 500,000 dollar watch!”
“Do you like it? I even got it customized for you. It has P4L in the band. And don’t worry about the price, pretty cheap for Rolex.
Only Y/n would think half a million is cheap.
“Yea I love it but I can’t accept this. I just know this was lot of money.”
“Yes you can and you will! Ok? I love you.”
“I love you too Y/n” and they shared a kiss.
“And you better wear this all the time it was such a pain to get this.”
_____
“A Rolex?!” Kie exclaimed.
“JJ do you know how much these are?” Pope asked and JJ nodded.
“She spent half a mil on me.”
“What the fuck?!” They all exclaimed.
______
JJ and Y/n were walking around with their hands intertwined.
“Wanna play 21 questions Jay?” He just nodded.
“What’s your dream car?”
His eyes widened. “Y/n you’re not getting me a car are you? I don’t even have a license!”
“No of course not! Just asking?” He didn’t believe you but after a lot of convincing, he gave in.
“Fine a nice starter car would probably be a dodge challenger.”
He’s so gullible.
“Alright cool I will be right back ok?”
He nodded and knew something was up.
_____
All the pogues were chilling around the front by the lake and they hear music blasting. They all turn and see a black car with a red bow on it.
Y/n stepped out of the car.
“Surprise Jay!”
They all just stood there.
“A fucking car!” Pope yelled.
“Oh my god I might get it with Y/n.” John B said.
“Y/n what is this!” JJ said walking up to her.
“It’s your car and I’m paying for your license and anything you need so you can actually drive it. Do you not like it?”
“I love it! It’s just a car?!”
“Look at the interior!”
He did and he can’t lie the inside is pretty sick. The drivers seat has his initials in it and the passenger seat has yours in it.
He fucking loves it.
He ran up to you and gave you a big hug and you giggled. “I’m taking it that you love it?” He just nodded enthusiastically. You hand him the keys and he instantly gets in with you and take it for a test drive.
You love spoiling JJ.
THREE MONTH BREAK IS CRAZY but im backkkkkkkk 👅👅👅👅
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Finders Givers | Prompted by @aellafreya
Curiosity.
Some may call it a dangerous thing. Some may argue for its ability to lead you to the truth of things. Some may claim it leads you to temptation, to regret, to suffering.
Steve Harrington, was curious.
He’d found the source of his curiosity while visiting a bar he’d planned on purchasing. It wasn’t a huge establishment. Or a well known one. Not exactly big bucks in the making but it was sat in a prime location atop a cellar that led to miles of underground tunnels which frankly.
He wanted.
He wanted them and not for legal reasons either. The tunnels weren’t on any official city map, predating them, Robin and Nancy, his right hand, and his researcher, found them by pure chance while on a fun little jaunt through the local libraries.
Fun being a stretch for Robin, but she needed to hang out with another woman her own age. And so did Nancy.
But he wanted those tunnels, they stretched all over the damn city, with just a little bit of work they could pop up anywhere, perfect for many a less than legal activity.
So many by-chance happenings had led him to that ratty little bi-fold leather wallet. Wasn’t even quality leather either. It looked old too, black with an embossed devil head pattern that probably came from some truck stop somewhere.
He could have just handed it in to the owner he was trying to buy out, could have even thrown it away, but curiosity was a devil sometimes. So there he was, sat down at one of the many tables in that little bar while one of his people did the majority of his work for him (honestly what’s the point of having people if they cant do your work for you?) perusing the contents and feeling more and more depressed by the second.
First, there was a wad of coupons and a single quarter in there instead of bills, which was never a good sign.
Second, a single, solitary, sad, badly rolled little joint.
Third. A single bank card with Mr E J Munson on it. Not even a credit card, just. A debit. Which statistically didn’t mean great things about this person’s credit score. Could just mean the owner was trying to avoid debt, but… doubtful.
Fourth, a stick of gum.
Fifth, a guitar pick.
Sixth, a library card, oof couldn’t even afford to buy the books.
An expired driver’s license desperately in need of renewal registered to Edward Joseph Munson, the photo made him look like he’d just gotten out of jail or some shit, his hair a terrible buzzcut and eyes too big, too dark, and too haunted to be anything else, but then that was just sometimes how those photos turned out. He could have been a totally innocent man!
It had his address on it, a few descriptors, height half an inch shorter than Steve himself, brown hair, brown eyes, male, 140lbs at point of issue (he’d been seventeen), date of issue, issuing State, along with a date of birth, clocking him at a year older than Steve, twenty nine, and… that he was apparently a donor.
And finally, a month old pay stub from a local fast food joint. So minimum wage worker at best.
It was… kind of sad really. Steve actually looked up the address on his phone, just for curiosities sake, because he was already in deep enough to look through a guy’s wallet, might as well google the poor saps address, just in case he felt charitable enough to drop it off on the way back to the high rise.
Oh there was that deep sadness some people might yell ‘I told you so’ about.
It wasn’t bad. But it sure as shit wasn’t good either. Steve knew of at least six bottom dweller drug dealers that operated out of that block, which explained the joint.
And also made him sadder about the joint, the weed probably wasn’t even all that good.
“Hey Robbie?” His long time friend and platonic soulmate turned her bored gaze over to him, she’d been playing angry birds on her phone, he could hear the war cries of those birds every time she launched one. “We done any charity this quarter?”
“Mmmmmnmnnnnoooooo?” It always looked good to the public for a rich guy like him to do charity work. Wouldn’t look too deeply into him if he was seen publicly doing good. “Unless you count telling Dustin to go wild in that nerd shop last week as ‘charity’, your child nearly emptied the damn shop.”
“Nah that was his birthday present, can’t call that charity.” He wasn’t going to reiterate that Dustin wasn’t his child. He was basically mom at that point.
“Alright, so what’re you thinking?” She sat up, turning to face him properly, putting her phone screen down on the table “Sponsoring something? A drive? There’s this cute little animal shelter in Japan called HEART I read about last month, ran by just a woman and her husband working with volunteers, could be a good thing to donate to? Helping animals is always good for PR.”
“…Those sound way better than what I was thinking, this guy’s wallet is bumming me out.” The expression on her face could have probably put grumpy cat to shame. “Pick one of your choices and do something with it, whichever you want. Imma do something about this wallet.” It didn’t have to be a big PR stunt, the fact that he was doing it on the DL as well? It always came back around all sunshine and roses because people believed it was totally selfless.
Didn’t do it for PR, couldn’t be doing it for PR, he hadn’t announced it.
It was always for PR. Always. The reaction just took a little longer to circulate and people were suckers.
“Just give it back to him? That should be charity enough. It’s like nine bucks to replace a driver’s license, you’re saving him nine bucks. Charity.”
“For someone who started out poor, you’re awful, Robin Buckley. Deal with this bar thing for me would you? I’m going to go on an adventure.” Curiosity was a powerful thing!
“Alright but if you come home with another stray I’m suing!”
“That was—”
“Seven times Steve! Seven!!” It wasn’t his fault that he struggled to see teenagers down on their luck. And four of them were two sets of siblings so it technically counted as one time per set, and one came with Nancy so—!
“Fine!” –So, he wouldn’t argue.
Empires weren’t built with throw away people who held no loyalty to you although he did have many of those on staff. Empires like his were built on the foundation of family, and while the one he’d grown up with was a little bit lacklustre, the one he’d built was perfect.
So he wouldn’t argue, he knew she loved them just as much as he did, in her own way, and that any additions would be welcomed with open arms.
—
Steve didn’t take the car. Although he probably should have, he knew at least three of his people would be following him, keeping an eye on him for safety reasons. At a distance of course but they’d be tailing him for the sake of safety.
That neighbourhood wasn’t safe. No matter if he had a weapon on him or not, it wasn’t safe for people like him.
People with visible wealth.
The watch on his wrist alone was probably worth more than some of the buildings in that neighbourhood, and it wasn’t exactly early in the day either. The sun setting made for an excellent ‘rich person in the wrong goddamn neighbourhood’ future police report.
But he made it to his destination unscathed.
The fast food joint from that pay stub. He even double checked the address on it. The chances of this Edward Munson being there were low, but that was fine, he just wanted to check it out. The atmosphere in there, the management styles, he’d hang out in the corner, get a cheap coffee and people watch for a while. See how fun Edward's work life was so he could add it to his decision making tree.
Curiosity really was one depressing little bitch baby.
The manager on staff was loud. Rude. Sexist. And he was pretty sure he’d made one of the staff cry because she’d hurried out very quickly rubbing at her face and sniffling. The temptation to put out a hit on him? High. But no, that was a lot for one asshole… maybe he’d just send Jane out, let the kid take his knees out.
She deserved a little bastard ba—
Someone beat him to it. A commotion later started by someone with a lot of hair, hair that’d been put up in a net and half hidden beneath the uniform’s god awful mustard yellow cap. It’d been two hits, the guy hitting him, and the manager hitting the floor, blood pouring from a very broken nose, spectacular.
The rest of the staff looked on in wide eyed horror, one yelping “Eddie, holy shit!” as the man pulled his cap off to reveal all that hair. “You’re so fired!”
“Didn’t need this shit show anyway! Chris an I quit, peace out assholes!!” Eddie. Eddie. Steve rose to his feet. Godawful coffee forgotten in the face of the mystery Edward, who caught his eye once before continuing on his way, all big brown frankly beautiful Bambi eyes, less haunted but still so big, full, kissable lips, and god, so much hair, going in the same direction as the blonde who’d disappeared to probably go and cry.
Eddie did need that job. He really needed that job. Steve had seen the state of his wallet. He needed that job, or at least he needed the paycheque that came from that job. Couldn’t even afford to buy his own books! He rented them, he rented books.
Jesus.
God, Robin was gonna judge him so bad for the person he was about to become.
Part 2
#PirateWrites#FindersGiversFiclet#Steddie#Mob Boss Steve Harrington#No Upside Down AU#Shady!Steve#CW: Stalker Vibes#nothing nefarious it's all lighthearted non-threatening stuff#Sugar Baby Eddie who never agreed to be a sugar baby but isn’t complaining.
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Hey! I love your beach head canons, and I would love to see your take on the Hazbin Hotel characters on a road trip/maybe a trip to a theme park? I feel like that would be cute lol.
Yes of course! This sounds so fun but I decided to make it a road trip to wherever the reader decides (Theme park, wherever)! This actually works perfectly as a prequel/sequel to my Beach Trip! Headcanons I've posted. Hope you enjoy!
Hazbin Hotel Road Trip! Headcanons
Characters: Charlie, Vaggie, Alastor, Angeldust, Husk, Sir Pentious, Vox, Lucifer, Adam, and Cherri Bomb
Charlie 🐐🫶
Originally wanted to be the one to drive, but Vaggie figured her inclination to be distracted by anything on the side of the road would cause everyone to crash, so Vaggie refused to let her drive at any point
Doesn’t even have her license so she wouldn’t be able to drive anyways so
“Ugh fine! Well, then, I call shotgun!!”
Went from Princess of Hell to passenger princess hehe
Was upset at not driving but got over it quickly as realizing she enjoys the view more than driving
“Oh my gosh look at those deer! Wait there’s more over there! Wait. Did we just drive past the rest area, I need to pee again!!”
Constantly nags the driver by chitchatting to them, regardless if they’re listening
A bad habit of hers is playfully hitting others when Charlie talks, but she forgets to not do this when driving
A couple of minor accidents nearly occur but she is unfazed
Is so pumped and asks to stop and look at any roadside attraction
It begins to become a bit annoying after a while
Vaggie ❌🥀
Is the one who drives for the most part on this road trip
Is a bit grumbly because she was woken up so early by an eager Charlie to go on this trip and needs her beauty sleep
Is the only one who can handle Charlie’s constant nagging and pushing, and is also the only one with a license out of the whole group, so logically the ex-Angel is the one who drives
Only pays attention to the road and not Charlie unfortunately for maximum safety
Is sipping on a large Circle K cup that she filled with Monster Energy prior to the trip
This just barely wakes her enough to watch the road
Has a bit of road rage but these guys are from Hell, what can you expect
Refuses to waste gas so only stops for gas when the car is literally empty
Empty like everyone else had to get out of the car and push it to the nearest gas station that was three miles away, empty
“Come on guys, we’re almost there.” She’ll say smugly sipping her Monster from within the car in the AC
Alastor 🦌📻
Was invited on this road trip, but ended up driving on his own to their destination
Yes, he doesn’t have a license, but he’s the Radio Demon he does what he pleases
Mainly decided to drive separately so that he could listen to his radio in peace without complaints or extra unnecessary noise
Is listening to jazz, and keeps on repeating the songs: “Fly Me to the Moon” and “Sing, Sing, Sing”
Also prefers to be alone, he vibes better that way and is more in his element
Drives the coolest, red, vintage pick up truck ever
All the girls and guys at the stop lights are just fawning over him but the Radio Demon can’t see anything past the road in his shades
Drives super fast and only stops for gas, which considering the age of his truck, ends up happening often
Angeldust 🕷️❤️🔥
Wanted to get one of those party buses with the strip poles inside but now has to make do with the crew’s giant van
Enough space to do lines of coke so it’s okay
Obviously snuck in drugs and alcohol, this is a given, it’s Angeldust come on
“I call aux!!” and plays his playlist titled Cunty B*tch
It’s a bunch of Ayesha Erotica, Kesha, Lady Gaga, Britney Spears, etc.
Screams all of the songs at the top of his lungs while hanging out of the window
“HE MIGHT NOT LOOK LIKE HE GETS BITCHES, BUT HONEY THAT DICK WAS ELEVEN INCHES!”
Husk has to pull him inside but he’s just having the time of his life
Loud as Hell but provides the entertainment, and Vaggie appreciates his music taste
Has to get Vaggie to pull over and proceeds to violently throw up all the alcohol he chugged earlier on the side of the highway as Cherri films laughing from inside the van
Immediately falls asleep after this embarrassing moment as the aftermath of his “fun” takes a toll on him
Husk 🐈⬛🥃
Was planning to catch up on missed hours of sleep by dozing through this entire trip, but Angeldust made this quite hard
Is wrapped up in a blanket, eye mask on, earplugs in, headphones on, neck pillow propped, and stuffed toy snuggled (HE SLEEPS WITH A STUFFED TOY OMG)
It’s a miniature Pegasus he named after his favorite drink: Whiskey
Angeldust, Cherri, and Adam won’t stop making fun of him the entire trip
This, plus Angeldust’s music, Charlie’s nonstop talking causes Husk to EXPLODE
“IF YOU ALL DONT SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR A SECOND!”
But his geared-up sleep ware makes him look a bit goofy as he shouts this, so everyone instead bursts out laughing
The feline just grumbles to himself as he decides to just stare out the window depressingly for the rest of the ride
Gets bored and ends up practicing Poker and Solitaire with the cards he brought
Is also keeping an eye on Angeldust who at first was off the wall
Once Angeldust passes out, Husk covers him with his blanket so he’s not cold (aww)
Sir Pentious 🐍🥚
Actually was the one who designed and crafted the van
The original van wasn’t big enough for the whole crew after Cherri decided to join in last minute, so of course the snake is going to build an ENTIRE new vehicle for his Cherri Bomb <3
Engineered the van for maximum comfort and refused Angeldust’s pleads for strip poles inside; “Thossse would be ssso uneccesssary!”
Instead, he included luxurious feet space, and AC and heater system throughout the whole van, seats with massaging for backs and feet, mini TVs on the back of each seat, and a fancy mini fridge for food
Also built miniature seats for his Egg Bois with built-in heating pads in case they get too cold in the AC
These Egg Bois have a really specific temperature range they can survive in, so those same heating pads were engineered by Sir Pentious to also work as cooling pads
“Anything for my babiesss”
Came extra prepared and was the only one to bring snacks and drinks to put in the cooler
Is constantly offering Cherri a water or coke whenever she is “looking a bit dehydrated”
Which happens to be every 2 minutes according to him
Is trying so hard to flex on her the fact that he built the van
“Ssssoo Cherri, how are you enjoying the back masssssage? I programmed it to perfectly meet the needsss of a beautiful lady like you”
Bro with 0 rizz somehow ends up charming her
Vox 🖥️⚡️
This TV ignores the mini TVs Sir Pentious built arguing they’re “not of top Vox quality”
Tries to hijack them to prove his point, but Sir Pentious is smarter than that and even his mini TVs are Vox-resistant
Ego bruised, now tries to hijack the radio to turn off Angeldust’s loud ass music, but Sir Pentious ALSO came prepared for that
Sir Pentious even shaped his seat and headrest to fit Vox’s big ass TV head perfectly, so Vox isn’t able to complain about anything
Now an upset Vox is left to sit in silence for most of the trip
Will chime in occasionally to the conversations but you can tell his pride was hurt
Spends his hours of silence to brainstorm ways to defeat Alastor
Lucifer 🪽🐤
Brought his rubber duckies to play house with them on the ride
To everyone’s surprise, knows all the lyrics to all of Angeldust’s songs
“What! I enjoy these too!” Proceeds to lip sync them in the most fruity way
Is Lucifer straight or gay? Bi? No one knows.
Is definitely that one person in a car ride to try to start a game of “100 bottles of beer on a wall” or the game of concentration
LIVES for these games
“20 questions” is his favorite
Tries to get everyone involved and yells at Husk once he sees he’s playing his own game of Poker
Husk suggests that Lucifer should play the silent game
Will try to convince the others to play by reciting them old dad jokes
This does not work
Adam 🎸🤘
Will definitely pig out on all of those snack Sir Pentious brought
“YO WHERE THE FUCK IS THE BEER”
Forces Vaggie to stop at a gas station 5 minutes into the trip to buy 3 twelve packs of beer
Is absolutely in his happy place with the massage chair, vast feet space, TV playing “Too Hot to Handle”, chips, and beer
Is the only one who manages to trash his space with wrappers, spills, and crumbs
Does not give a fuck
Has his window down, sunglasses on, and wind blowing in his face while he just yells
Shouts and catcalls to every hot chick they pass by
Brought an air horn to do that more efficiently while on the highway
Is seated next to Vox so is taunting and teasing him about the whole incident earlier
“Hmm not so tough anymore huh? Even these mini TVs are doing a better job than you!”
Is a bit of a menace
Cherri Bomb 🍒💣
Only joined last minute for the trip because she thought it would be lame at first
But Angeldust promised to bring along drugs and alcohol so she agreed
Made a certain snake sooo happy that she decided to come
Is constantly nagged by him throughout this whole trip but she has grown used to it
She even starts to think it’s cute how much he cares
Has to stop to go pee so often because of all the beverages Sir Pentious keeps offering her
Doesn’t wait for a rest area, will pop a squat on the side of the road
Sings along with Angeldust (and Lucifer??) to all the songs
Actually she’s the one who made the playlist and shared it with Angeldust ;)
“Ooh ooh skip this one, the next one’s even better!”
Brought an Erotica novel to read (she usually just skips to the good parts)
Is glad to be sitting next to Angeldust but still films him as he throws up so that they can joke about it later
Passes time with him playing, Fuck, Marry, Kill
She ends up answering Fuck to all the options
#hazbin alastor#hazbin angel dust#hazbin hotel#hazbin husk#hazbin lucifer#headcanon#hazbin charlie#alastor#hazbin art#hazbin hotel edit#alastor hazbin hotel#sir pentious#hazbin hotel adam#lucifer hazbin hotel#charlie morningstar#vaggie hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#alastor x reader#huskerdust#husker x angel dust#husker hazbin hotel#husker x reader#angeldust#angelhusk#hazbin hotel husk#vivziepop#vaggie#hazbin hotel fanart#lucifer morningstar#hazbin hotel lucifer
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Traitor💔
Miguel O'Hara x Spider-Woman Reader
Synopsis: A blurb detailing your heartbreak from Miguel inspired by some breakup songs. Word count 1.5k ish. Meant to be a one shot. (JK, I MADE AN EPILOGUE)
A/N: had this idea after @prettyinpink350 commented that The Woman He Didn't Choose part 1 reminded them of All Too Well-10 minute version by Taylor Swift. I imagine getting your heart broken by him would SUCK. The man has such a tragic backstory, it would take a long long time to get him to be comfortable with getting hurt again and vulnerable, possibly hurting whoever he's dating or seeing in the process if their expectations don't align. I think that ATSV and the comic version of him are different however, it's possible some of the personality traits would stay consistent and so as a result he might struggle with infidelity. I think he's had his fair share of experiences.
BUT I do still write sweet, fluffy soft Miguel, though. Because I do believe he has a soft side that exists and it's unfair imo to write him off as completely incapable of being a good partner because I believe he can. I imagine it'll be a tough road but he would eventually get there. He's a complex man and I love him anyway. 🫶🏽 Working on DD part 9 and the woman he didn't choose I promise, I've been dead lately in terms of motivation.
TW: MINORS DNI, ANGST, CHEATING (I DON'T CONDONE THIS), HEARTBREAK, BREAKUP, MIGUEL IS MORE COLD IN THIS, SMUT ( IT'S BRIEF, P IN V, DEGRADATION, SPANKING), age gap(reader is 26, Miguel is like 34-35), no happy ending
The songs that inspired this(all rights to rightful owners, some of the lyrics were tweaked slightly):
----
It was her. It was always going to be her.
🎶I was just the villain built to come between you two.
I'm just the other point of view. 🎶
It's the movie where the guy gets the girl in the end. She's the one that got away but then comes back into his life, lighting up his world, making him realize his new girlfriend would never come close.
That all too familiar shift in the way he acted when she moved back into the city. When you noticed how he started looking at you with a gaze that was clearly being stolen by someone else. You decided to ask him about it and he dismissed you with a shake of his head, calling you paranoid.
🎶Brown guilty eyes and little white lies
Yeah, I played dumb but I always knew🎶
Now he brings her around, almost as though to shut you down on purpose. Showing her off like a brand new trophy.
If any of the sweet nothings he told you were true, there's simply no damn way that he could have fallen in love again so quickly...
🎶Ain't it funny....🎶
----
But months later
🎶You call me up again just to break me like a promise.🎶
The 1 am call you know you shouldn't answer but you do anyway.
"She's not here.......Please, I need you."
And there you go, jumping in the shower for a quick rinse and brushing your teeth, speeding towards his apartment like a dumb ass.
------
"Fuck......FUCK! God baby...so fucking tight.....I missed this pussy, fuck...."
A shower of sharp spanks land on your ass, one after another, after another as Miguel thrusts his cock into you from behind.
"Yes.....harder, baby.....HARDER!"
"Yeah?....You would fucking like that, wouldn't you....Needy little slut....mmmm you like it when I fuck you like this, huh? Can't get enough can you? "Had to come crawling back for more of this cock?"
Every word stings harder than the slaps he's giving you but it's a sick, twisted, erotic feeling. You actually love it. The fact that he's still craving your pussy even though he's supposedly with his dream woman. The fact that you're still on his mind as soon as she leaves.
The fact that you're in his bed right now, not her. Even if only just for tonight.
"Fuck....yes.....baby.....can't get enough of you....mmmmm fuck I missed you so much....."
"Say that again."
"Missed you so much Miggy...."
"¿Cuánto?..." (how much)
"So fucking much....I crave you all the time....."
Miguel lets out a loud groan and you practically scream as he pounds you without mercy into his mattress he shared with the other woman.
Shortly after, you're laying all fucked out, panting as you close your eyes, decelerating from the heavenly orgasm he pulled out of you, only for it to shrivel up when you feel your clothes land in a pile next to your head.
"She'll be back any minute....you gotta hurry."
"What?" You sit up, confused.
Miguel's too busy taking a shower, trying to rid himself of your scent. The damning evidence of someone else in his bed while she was gone.
You immediately regret ever coming over.
You're about to rip him a new one but your spider senses tingle. You can feel her ascending the staircase. You throw on your leggings and hoodie and swing away into the night without saying goodbye.
-----
You let him have it on the phone later.
"I wish you thought through all of this before you strung me along and made me fall in love with you..."
Miguel stands outside his apartment, he had to sneak down to take your call as soon as he was sure she was asleep. He tenses his jaw. He feels guilty but there's not much he can do about it now.
"She's older...more mature. I need to be with someone who's able to understand and live with my responsibilities. I shouldn't have given us a chance, but I did because I needed to move on from her.... I can't help that I've known her since we were kids. She gets me."
🎶So casually cruel in the name of being honest. 🎶
"Oh and I don't? I don't Miguel? So all those times I stayed up with you, crying, holding you and promising you I wasn't going anywhere, those didn't happen? Or the fact that I saw you lose it completely multiple times and still called you the next day? The fact that I was willing to let go all the times you let me down because I knew it wasn't your fault and the fate of the multiverse comes before everything else? I literally loved you at your worst, but that didn't matter?"
Silence.
"Look, I just think that maybe if we had been closer in age, we would've been fine."
🎶And that sentence made you want to die. 🎶
"That's not fucking fair, Miguel! I'm 26, not a baby! And we spoke CANDIDLY about this when we got together. I NEVER had, not even a HINT that this would be a problem for you, and now you drop it on me right as you tear my heart out?! And it's not even something I can change!"
You pause, more sobs erupting deep from within your soul.
"I'm sorry, that the stars didn't align and the timing wasn't perfect and my dad didn't fuck my mom around the same time as yours so I could've been born at a better time. I'm sorry that I tried so fucking hard to be the chill girlfriend who lets you do whatever even though I'm not. I'm sorry that I kept my fucking mouth shut when I knew damn well you were talking to her when we were together just so I could keep you around. I'm sorry that I'm not her..."
The line is painfully silent.
🎶The idea you had of me, who was she?🎶
"So who's this version of me in your head you envisioned, huh Miguel? The perfect me that would've made you stay. Do I even know her? She's me, but she's not. She's not needy like I am. She's perfect. Has the perfect body, perfect hair, doesn't ever look bad for you. She's intelligent and has all the maturity you claim I don't. She reflects back on you perfectly every little thing you just LOVE about yourself because let's face it, that's the only person you really ever gave a fuck about."
Loud beeps assault your eardrum and you scoff in disbelief. He hung up, and who knows how long you were just talking to a wall. You hurtle your phone at the ground, letting the screen crack as your knees buckle beneath you and hide your face in your hands in despair.
🎶When she's sleeping in the bed we made, don't you dare forget about the way you betrayed me.
Cause I know that you'll never feel sorry, for the way I hurt, yeah. 🎶
----
Trying to forget him as the weeks passed by ,albeit agonizingly slow. You find yourself weeping in the HQ bathroom, some girl asking you what happened:
🎶You. That's what happened, you. 🎶
A few weeks later, a package with all of your clothes arrived at the post office for you so he didn't have to see you face to face. It even contained all of the pictures you took together and the letters you wrote him. He didn't keep a single one.
You sat in the parking lot for a few minutes as you clutched the Disneyland tickets to your heart, sobbing. The cruel, cruel irony of remembering how you were in the happiest place on earth with him, the place that planted those dreams of happily ever after in that little girl's head, only for her to be crying over a man that stomped it into the ground years later.
Remembering how you walked back, arm in arm to your hotel room together as you leaned into his chest, giggling when you finally got him to admit the park wasn't as dreadful as he thought it would be, despite the ridiculous price tag. He only wanted to make you happy.
🎶I remember it all too well. 🎶
Your lip trembles when you find the Mickey Ears you bought for him lying in the box. "Miguel" cross-stitched in curly gold writing on the back.
Your red scarf from that first week together hung in the corner of his closet until your scent wore off. He would eventually have the gall to offer it to her one December night when she was shivering, saying that it was his mother's.
----
Your tears make your vision blurry as you drive down the dark, rain soaked streets of Nueva York.
You know his street is coming.
When you do finally pass it, you use all your strength to keep your gaze straight ahead, the faded letters on his street sign disappear rapidly behind you as you take a deep breath, and head on home.
----
Epilogue
#miguel o'hara#miguel atsv#spotify#miguel ohara#miguel x reader#miguel o'hara x reader#atsv miguel#miguel o'hara smut#across the spiderverse#miguel o hara angst#miguel o'hara angst#miguel o'hara imagine#miguel o hara x y/n#miguel o'hara x fem!reader#miguel ohara x fem!reader#Spotify
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you visit jude and decide to take him through the night to show him a little something, and he shows you one in return
bff!jude x reader
word count - 900+
watch it - pure fluff + teasing and silly judi
-----
windows down driving through a warm madrid night with jude in your passenger. just happy you let him tag along. its your second day in the city, your first seeing him in months. you’ve been itching to. but he doesn’t need to know. his ego will only inflate even more. what will you do with him then? he's already a hand full.
he wanted to greet you at the airport (and bring flowers. friends bring flowers to airports right? right...)
he thinks you'd kill him if he did either.
he missed you, though he doesn’t yet know how to say it yet. worse, he thinks he just might love you.
friendship with you makes him want to tear his hair out. why does he want to kiss you. why does his heart ache at every single good bye. and more importantly why are you one of the very select few that hes allowed to call or face time him at any time
he needs to get it together. especially when you look so star studded like this, driving with one hand, lights of the city flickering on your face, drumming your fingers against the wheel while you tease him
he treasures you. he doesn’t know why you keep going out of your way to see him. he wants to ask. one day, some day, not today.
he chooses to stick his head out the window instead , ignoring the looks he just knows he's getting from the cars around him. you only giggle at his antics, turning the music up.
you hum to the music that blasts from the speakers, not a care in the world, weaving through the streets maybe a little too carelessly but you cant help it. not when his eyes gleam so.
he sticks his head back inside, shimmying into his seat properly, but he hasn’t had enough of the night breeze. hand hanging out of the window, arms outstretched, reaching up up up. you think he could reach the stars like this.
who are you kidding. he's a star himself.
he turns to you, smile wide, burst of laughter falling from his lips, "you drive like a mad man."
you shrug, "you’re having fun aren’t you?"
he mimics you, raising his shoulders dramatically, "am i?"
you shake your head, looking over your shoulder as you change lanes. he laughs, mumbling something about you needing extra classes. and who has their license in the first place, you or him?
never mind that, you want to show him something. you saw it driving to your hotel.
you come off the highway, slowing down as you go up a ramp, back into city roads. you watch as he looks out the window wide eyed. jude, always eager to experience everything. do you make the list?
you hope so.
you drive through turns and loops with one hand, the other outstretched trying to catch the wind.
"copy cat." he mutters.
you narrow your eyes at him, "and who can drive then?"
he quiets at this, huffing in his seat.
you reach the side of a building, parking your car. jude is still pretending to sulk when you step out, heading over to his side.
you lean down, resting a hand on the door, "come on you big baby, something i wanna show you."
he perks up at this, "a surprise?"
you snort, "something like that."
he hops out, closing the door being him. you don’t go very far, leaning on the drivers side of your car, pointing to the side of a building. he looks up, gasping.
its a billboard of him, spanning practically the whole side of the structure. there he stands in his iconic stance. text reading "made in birmingham" on the bottom.
"ive never seen this one before..." he trails off.
"pretty cool one. its huge."
he hums, "makes me look extra cool."
you scoff, "yeah you need it."
"hey!' he yells, launching forward as you run from him.
down the street while you giggle, only the moon and street lights to guide your path. he hurls empty insult while you try not to think too deeply about the implications of it all. he catches up in an instant. of course he does. grabbing your arm and dragging you back to your car while you groan.
you try to throw a fit, wriggling against his grip the best you can but man is the guy strong. turning to face you, brow raised. he turns a little to fast, till your pressed almost right up against each other. faces so close you could just lean in to-
kiss!
his lips press against yours. warm and sweet. soft and gentle.
he pulls away just as fast, apologies tumbling from the same lips so fast he cant hear you saying its okay.
so you kiss him instead. wrapping a hand around his. you can feel him relax under you, tensions seeping from his frame where he stands.
grounded.
when you part. you think your face is genuinely in flames. oh how youve dreamed of doing just that a million times over.
he laughs , the idiot laughs. clutching onto your hands like a life line, "ive been waiting ages to do that." he sighs.
"me too." you confess, shy. looking away, your gaze ends up back at billboard jude.
he wrinkles his nose, "id rather kiss you more somewhere where he isn’t spying."
you gasp, "are you jealous of yourself?" dragging the two of you back to your car.
he shrugs, ducking back inside and buckling up, "im just saying he doesn’t need to be seeing my business."
you roll your eyes, turning your car on and back to driving, "you’re so dramatic."
"but you’re having fun aren’t you?" he teases.
you ignore this. speeding through streets with all the windows down while you let him choose the music again.
you have a soft spot so what? so does he.
#jude x you#jude bellingham imagine#jude x reader#jude bellingham x reader#jude bellingham x you#jude bellingham one shot#bahr footy#footy fic#footballer fic#football fanfic#jude x y/n#jude bellingham headcanons#jude bellingham x y/n
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My personal Headcannons for Daryl Dixon that I will defend with my life
Just a warning! there is some nsfw❤️🔥 content in this list (not a ton)
This is a list full of random Headcannons I have, some are xreader related, some are just fun little things I’d like to believe because they’re fun
He l o v e s head scratches and chin scratches, just like a dog, his mom used to do it to him as a kid, it’s just really comforting to him
He is 100% dyslexic, he’s super insecure about it, which is why he leaves reading and writing up to anyone else who’s willing to do it.
This dude is secretly a math wiz. It came super easy to him, but he does tend to keep it on the down low because it was never something he was allowed to be proud of as a child, and it’s not really a needed skill anymore
I personally do not believe Daryl did anything hard while running around with Merle, Shrooms and weed were his limit 99.99% of the time, unless he felt pressured, but even then it would take a lot of convincing
He’s very self conscious about how thick his accent can get, he grew up in a much more rural area than the rest of Rick and Co. (apart from Maggie of course) and he feels out of place with his speech patterns at times.
Daryl was definitely a highschool drop out, assuming his birthday is January 6th, he left as soon as he was old enough to do it without a parent’s consent (18)
I just know this man never got his license. Can you imagine him paying his way through classes and taking a drivers test? I can’t. He probably just got a state ID for booze and just drove around illegally (if he got an ID at all, I’m sure he knew quite a few places that didn’t card)
He runs hot, the cold is a lot easier for him to handle than the heat, which is why he tended to wear sleeveless shirts or half sleeves
He has never had a “crush” in his life. He’s thought people were hot before, of course he has, but romance was never really on his mind
He’s not a total virgin, but he’s not exactly skilled either. His body count is probably 3, and I guarantee you he was not sober before, during, or after.
He’s a thigh and breast man. Hands down.
I know deep in my soul that this man enjoys some face sitting.
He’s not an overly sexual guy, if you were asexual he’d be okay with never doing anything, so long as you were happy
If you’re nonbinary, he was definitely mean to you at the start, with the way he was raised it simply didn’t make any since to him, BUT once you get closer and he starts to trust you, he might (he will) start asking some questions to understand you better
He isn’t a pet name kinda guy. He’s completely on board with calling you sunshine or princess, but anything past that just isn’t for him, and he really isn’t a fan of you giving him one either, unless it’s just a joking matter like how Carol calls him “pookie” from time to time
He’s a morning person and he hates it. He always wakes up at the ass crack of dawn, and every time he wishes he hadn’t.
He is definitely an insomniac, likely derived from having night terrors as a kid
He’s definitely self conscious about his scars, but not enough to cause issues if anyone happened to see them, he isn’t ashamed of them, but he doesn’t want to explain where their from, and he genuinely hasn’t thought of a good enough lie to tell instead.
When rick saw them for the first time Daryl had him fully convinced he was in a fight with a bear for about a week (rick never asked for the real reason)
He has a heavy sweet tooth, and likes to keep hard candy with him at all times (if possible) and he has never, and will never, pass up chocolate in any form.
He genuinely has chicken scratch for handwriting, he does not plan on ever attempting to make it easier to read, he enjoys the struggle people face when he’s put in a position where he has to write anything down. (Plus it helps conceal his errors if they do figure it out)
He does genuinely want kids in his life. Even if they can’t be his biologically. Being “uncle Daryl” is the best feeling he’s ever experienced, and he really wants to experience that with you if you’d allow it/want it (he would never pressure you to have kids)
Headaches and migraines plague his existence and they always have
He had super long hair as a kid and one of his punishments was his dad shaving it all off, which is why he kept it short until after the outbreak.
He would let you paint his toenails, or match his middle finger with whatever polish you decided to wear
This dude HATES clowns. Seeing a walker in a clown get up would absolutely kill him on the inside
You got sick? Don’t worry about it, he will absolutely attempt to make you soup from scratch using bone marrow and whatever else he can find
Fishing is not his thing. He knows how to, but he much prefers just catching them by hand or with a spear.
The closer you two get, the more likely he is to try and convince you that Bigfoot is real
Daryl is a secret star wars fan
He does NOT like country music, Led Zeppelin, Rob zombie, Ozzy osbourne and Lamb of god are much more his thing
He wasn’t a technology kind of guy, so if you tried to explain any aspect of social media to him he’d be completely lost (he didn’t even have a cellphone)
He has a super dry sense of humor
If he had to choose between starving to death or eating plain Cheerios, he would choose death.
One of the reasons he isn’t big on showering is because he doesn’t have a strong immune system from his childhood neglect, and he doesn’t want to shock his body and get sick
He also just hates the way soap feels on his skin. It’s way too sticky
During sex, he’s not strictly dominant or submissive, he’s ready to adapt to whatever you want, even if that means being strictly vanilla
He’s afraid of Santa Clause
And the Easter bunny
He’s willing to try anything once, even if he doesn’t think he’ll like it
He knows a lot of information on plants and herbs, so depending on your mood, he’ll try to find a flower to brighten your day with a little scribbled note explaining its meaning (because you can actually read his atrocious writing)
He’s never once told you he loves you, and your relationship wasn’t a spoken fact. His actions tend to speak louder than words, and if you say you love him, he will occasionally reply with a “back at ya.” Or “me too”
He always has weird shit in his pockets, like cool rocks he found, dead flowers, and fallen leaves.
He genuinely does not understand a single thing that Eugene says, and he never has.
The first time he ever kisses you on his own (you 100% have to make the first move) it’s a very rough and embarrassed act where he just grabs you and plants one in ya before you can even think about what’s happening
He will change his favorite color to whatever yours is, because if you can see beauty in it, then it’s all he can see from then on out
#daryl dixon#the walking dead daryl#daryl dixion x reader#twd#daryl dixion imagine#daryl imagines#daryl x y/n#twd daryl
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