#grease monkey oil change
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BEWARE!! STAY AWAY FROM GREASE MONKEY
#greasemonkey #automobile #carrepair
Would you go to a doctor that wasn’t qualified? No, you wouldn’t! So why take your vehicle to someone that didn’t have the qualifications to work on it? Grease Monkey is one of many oil lube hacks that hires unqualified individuals and you’re putting your 30k or whatever price vehicle into their hands.
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#auto repair#automobiles#automotive school#automotive technician#car#car rally#car repair#cars of youtube#chevy#diy#do it yourself#don&039;t do it#ford#GREASE MONKEY#grease monkey near me#grease monkey oil change#harley davidson#honda#how to#insane throttle#not qaulified#oil change#oil lube#professional technician#racing#technician#toyota#truck repair#why you shouldn&039;t#youtube automotive
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Cash Slave, reporting in...
Good morning, master. State Trooper Hernandez reporting!
I hope you're doing well since the last time we saw each other. Again, I can't apologize enough for pulling you over on the highway. I had no idea you were such an amazing hypnotist. Thank you again for letting me get off easy and only making me taze myself twice! I was paralyzed in that muddy ditch for awhile, but you could've given me a helluva worse punishment!
Your instructions aren't negotiable, so I made sure to snap a photo before I started my shift today. As you suggested, I've been eating a box of donuts every morning, and I've packed on a hefty 30 lbs since I've started. My wife has complained, but I know you want me to look more like a cliche of law enforcement!
I'll stop by your house to drop off my paycheck tonight after work. I won't forget to pick up some pizza for you and your friends on the way: extra sausage, just like you said!
See you tonight, master!
Hello sir.
It's been a week since you came into my shop, and I've followed everything you said. I didn't agree with it at first, but you convinced me with that little pendant.
You were right! I really am beneath powerful men like you. Filthy blue-collar workers aren't worthy to lick the dirt off your shoes. You were right to point that out, and you were right to tell me to embrace it. When the world looks at me, they shouldn't see a man. They should see a grease monkey at the bottom of society.
That's why I haven't showered or changed in seven days. My BO is uncomfortable to work in, but I know it's just a reminder of what I am. I used to be proud of my job. Ha! I used to look down on suits like you, but I'm nothing in comparison; just a tool at your disposal.
Anyways, I cleaned and waxed your old car as fast as I could. I know I lent you my convertible, but you're welcome to keep it. I put a lot of sweat and blood in fixing her up, but like you said, fancy cars are meant for you to drive and me to maintain.
Stop back in my garage anytime. White-collar men like you get free service here! It's not the place of any lowly laborer to get in the way of what you want.
Thank you again, sir.
Hello boss.
Just started another long day of window washing! It's another hot one, but I'll keep my head down and sweat through it like usual.
I've gotta say, it's days like this that make me miss the comforts of my old corporate desk job. I'd kill for some AC right now, but I remember how much you made me realize I hated that career. Like you said, I'm much better suited to a life of mindless cleaning.
It turns out you're the real one with a knack for business strategy because all of your advice has been genius! The income is dependent on the hours I put in, and since I'm working for half the price of all competitors, I've gotten a monopoly on the market! I've fully booked all seven days for the next five or so weeks, so I'll be washing windows non-stop!
The business is already booming! I've been billing customers to your bank account, so you should already see all the profit in there!
Later today, I'll make a note of the minimum I need to replenish the cleaning supplies I'm running through. I'd also be grateful if you loaned me a bit for personal use, but it's understandable if you can't spare any! We agreed that I wasn't working for a salary, and I'm fine with that! I've been sleeping in the company van the last few weeks and it's more than good enough for me!
Don't worry, boss. I'll get back to work!
Tell my wife hello for me, master!
Working on a rig has been isolating. The job is brutal, the days are long, and every night I head back to our bunks covered in oil. I thought I'd at least get to bond with the other guys, but most of us are too tired to do anything but eat and sleep after our shift.
The only thing that's getting me through it is thinking about you. I know I also have a girl at home, but you were the one that gave my life purpose. I was never going to make money as an actor, and you helped me see that! You were the one that convinced me to go for this ridiculous job in the middle of the ocean, and now I'm making a ton of money!
You deserve it all.
I wouldn't have seen any of this cash if I hadn't stuck around after your stage hypnosis show. I still remember the wild look in your eyes when you came up with this idea for me. I also remember that hungry look you had when you saw my wife. It was impossible to say no.
Oh, and thanks for keeping my wife company while I'm gone. A man like you deserves her attention more than I do. Like you said, I doubt I was pleasing her to begin with. The only thing I'm good for is earning money, and I hope you're enjoying it because it sure isn't easy to earn!
I gotta get back, but I wanted to let you know that I signed up for another six months like you suggested. It's lonely, but I'm happy to do it, master!
Son, or should I still call you 'sir'?
I'm not sure if I your new title applies through text as well? Being your dad and your servant can be a bit confusing, but I don't mean disrespect you! Just let me know.
My workout is done and I'm headed back to your house. I signed the deed over to you this morning, so you officially own it now! Like usual, I'll clean the place from top to bottom. I've got all the mops and cleaning supplies in my van and ready to go. Since it's Friday, I'll start on the weekly yard work; mowing, weeding, etc... I don't want to bore you with the details, but it'll take the majority of the day to keep your place in tip top shape!
As I understand it, you are having friends over tonight, so I'll prepare a three course meal for eight. I ironed my apron this morning so I should look like a more presentable waiter than last night when I served your food!
As always, please let me know if there's any other way I can be of service today or tonight.
I'll be awaiting your return, sir.
Hey little bro,
I just finished my workout at the gym with dad. We're both hitting PRs and we're really starting to see some results! Still can't believe you hypnotized his dumb ass to think he's your butler! That man looks so stupid changing from gym clothes into a bowtie and gloves. He's constantly calling you 'sir' too, even when you're not around.
He's such an idiot.
Anyways, I'm all dressed and ready for my new job. You were totally right. I'm going to be so much happier as a clown instead of a wrestler. I'm about to head out to my first gig; a ten year old's birthday party. I think he's the kid of someone I used to compete with. It might be a little awkward, but it won't affect my routine. I've got an afternoon of pies in the face and self-deprecating humor ahead of me.
I made sure to tell the guy who hired me that I'm willing to stay after and clean up. Kids make a huge mess after all. I just hope he won't be too weird about me being a clown at his son's party. We may have been rivals in the past, but that was back when I wrestled. Now I'm just a joke for hire. He's technically my boss for the day, so I'll have to get used to taking orders from him.
Wish me luck, bro. I'll give you the money after the dad dismisses me. Let's hope I make a good clown!
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catharsis.
rating; PG-13.
pairing; Billy Russo x fem!reader.
cw; mechanic!reader, tomboy!reader, shitty childhoods including; abandonment and neglect, language, cynicism, alcohol consumption, kissing, best friends.
summary; Billy loves to watch you work, but you end up in a discussion on your respective childhoods. You have a healthier outlook than Billy.
wc; 461.
tagging; @terry2227 @kayhi808 @e-dubbc11 @firequeensposts @aoi-targaryen @oops89 @thejanecampaign @bookloverfilmoholic @littleblackcatinwonderland @zz-kennedy @fictional-hooman @snowkestrel @cant-help-simping @gh0stf1c3 @danzer8705 @milea @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @myladydarkling
notes; a little bit inspired by a true story, and also Letty from Fast and the Furious. ;)
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Your fingertips were oily as tinkered in the car, trying to clean the oil, and see why the check engine light was on.
Billy drank a beer, watching you in the cool autumn overcast, your hair in buns as you stood up, brushing your bangs from your face. ”Not gonna help, Mister Russo?”
“I believe in equality.” He said, saluting you with his beer. “How’d you learn all this anyway?”
You snatched the beer from him, taking a long drink. “My grandad always used to promise me we’d go fishing, spend time together. But he always ended up at the bar drinking. I’d sit in the car waiting for him, reading his car manuals. He was a mechanic, too.” You said, toe kicking the tire of the car.
Billy admired you in your white grease speckled tank top, and ripped jeans. You were a grease monkey. But you were his. ”I can take you fishing.” Billy said, his own bad memories surfacing about his mother. About being unwanted.
Your eyes crinkled at the corners as you smiled. “Oh, Billy. You’re sweet.”
He looked away, as kids played outside, playing hoops like he used to despite the cold weather. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t tell anyone. I got a reputation to keep.” He said, rolling his left shoulder, rubbing it with his fingers, the only hint he’d been hurt by someone.
You handed him the beer back, before you wiped the grease off your hands. “Is reputation really that important? What about being kind?” You asked, pinning him with a look. The wind blew the leaves around chilling you, as he extended his leg, bumping your old leather boots.
His eyes narrowed, “I was kind as a kid. Ma left me, and kids bullied me. Kindness gets you nowhere.” It didn’t get me love, he was saying in so many words.
“Billy, vulnerability is the only way to have meaningful relationships.” You said, rolling over to him, your stained fingers touched his knee, trying to soothe him, wishing to take his pain away, even into yourself just to see him happy. Fulfilled.
He leaned into your face. “I got you. I got Frank. I ain’t interested in making new friends.” His eyes were pits, hiding the pain behind anger and aggression.
And your heart ached. “I love you.” You said, fingers tightening on his knee.
Billy’s fingers touched your lip piercing, “I know.” His voice soft.
“Do you?” You asked, leaning closer.
His lips curved up as he kissed your mouth, in close mouth kissed, both of you drawing comfort from each other. Two broken souls finding catharsis in the affection.
But you didn’t expect anything more. You’d always made the habit of getting too attached, and clinging too desperately.
That would never change.
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Just had a really weird job interview that actually made me think about my childhood…(I said I was independent and resourceful and was asked to provide examples)
My dad bought me my first car, but as soon as I had my drivers license, he told me I was grounded until I knew how to change a tire and change my own oil. I was grounded for about a week. The only help he gave me was showing me where the owners manual was and a few forums about my specific model of car.
My dad, while I was getting my permit to drive, required that I drive him up to the local Indian reservation for casino night (he would keep $150 in his right pocket and as soon he was out he would leave, he kept the winnings in his left pocket and as soon as he was $300 up we would leave) also he tried to teach his most mathematicalally challenged child how to count cards at black jack? Not a successful enterprise. I barely passed high school chemistry.
When I was twelve there was a cross continent moving situation that required my dad and I to move ahead of my mom and middle sister (this is the time he lit the stove on fire from trying to fry bacon…) after the stove incident, he dug out the recipe cards his mother had made for my mom when they got married, shoved them at me, along with the cordless 1990’s phone and said “I’ve dialed your Aunt Rock, (his older sister) Daddy wants biscuits and gravy, make her walk you through it.”
That’s how I learned to cook; having my aunt on speed dial and I would tell her what was in the cabinets, she would make a list for me to give to dad, and then she would walk me through the recipe. As I cooked it.
As a teenager, my dad knew that I was capable of cooking exactly what he wanted (IE exactly what his mom and big sis cooked while he was growing up) and as an adult I’ve had to actually learn to enjoy cooking as an actual experience and process and not just “what I was told”
When I was 21 my dad spent about $700 on brand new parts for a car I owned that was falling apart…I spent my 21st birthday drinking beer on my dad’s driveway tearing apart my van to replace rotors and brakes, while my boyfriend at the time and dad sat back and did nothing while calling me a great little grease monkey.
Honestly, I’m still not sure if I’m proud or humiliated by that, but the grease monkey comment came from the bf and he didn’t last much longer…
I don’t know. Obviously I didn’t make myself quite this vulnerable when I was in the actual interview, but it feels good to be vulnerable after the fact?
I just feel like my dad gave me a lot of tools to figure shit out for myself, and being resourceful is actually a really great quality. Feeling? Idk.
Being resourceful gives you independence.
Because any problems that come up? There’s either a YouTube tutorial, a blog, or SOMETHING available as a resource. And if you’re out of internet service???? There’s literally a book in your glove compartment somewhere telling you what to do.
#humans are space orcs#independent action#be your own Prince Charming#he’s stuck in a tree go rescue him#my dad is a hot mess#no idea how to cook#it’s okay he’s got three daughters.two sisters.and a wife#what kind of engineer needs to distract himself like that
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Dad's bringing Mattie to the grease monkeys today cuz she needs an oil change (and I can't go because someone needs to watch the house, and I look young so mechanics always try to bilk me).
It's about 9am when he goes to start her up.
She doesn't start.
He keeps trying. She doesn't start. He pulls the choke, maybe it's the chill from last night? No start. Her engine turns over and roars, and then three seconds later it dies. All further attempts and she won't turn over at all. What the fuck?
He calls me out. "Come look at this." We troubleshoot for about 15. Can't figure out the problem. He tries to start her again. I smell petrol and signal him to call quits—overloaded the fuel line. I pop the bonnet, take off the air filter, set that in the grass and let the fuel line and engine and carb vent out the fumes. We wait for the smell to dissipate.
Five minutes later the smell's gone. I get in to see if I can start her—it's been 30 something years since Dad's driven a manual choke, but I drove one just last year in the freezing outback winter, an '87 Holden. And I learnt to drive in a '67 Mustang, manual choke. Sure, I totalled that car, but it wasn't related to the choke at all. Maybe Dad's just doing it wrong.
I pull the choke. Dad confirms from up front that the choke is working. I keep the choke closed, turn the ignition, and tap the accel. She doesn't start.
What the fuck? She was running like a beast yesterday!
I get out. While I get out I happen to look down and I see the manual fuel lever. And it's facing the door.
See, Mattie's a 1968 Ford F250 Camper Special. The Camper Special is made to carry a jackoff camper in the tray. Naturally, it has two tanks for petrol because the added weight is hell on the engine, one tank in the cab under the seat, and one tank in the tray. Now, normally you'd switch tanks from the switch on the dash, but as we've established nothing electrical in her really wants to work, and that includes the switch in the dash. So instead you have to use the emergency backup lever below the seatbelt feeder on the floor of the driver's side, next to the door. If the lever points forward it feeds from the cab tank, if the lever points backwards it feeds from the rear tank.
But the lever was pointing sideways, toward the driver's door. I'd suggested doing this last night as a hypothetical manual fuel shuftoff switch, something people often install on classic cars (or expensive modern cars) to prevent the cars from being stolen. If you run the car with the switch enabled, the only petrol the engine gets is whatever is left in the fuel line. You'll get about a metre before the engine dies. Now, theoretically, the tank switch should work the same way if it's rigged how I think it is—forward opens the front tank valve but closes the back, backwards opens the rear tank valve but closes the front, and sideways... either opens both, or closes both.
Turns out, it closes both. Cuz I got back in, reached down and flipped the lever forward, and turned the ignition. Tapped the accel and she roared up without issue—didn't even need to use the choke.
We sabotaged my truck and both of us ADHD idiots completely forgot we'd sabotaged the truck, so we spent 35 minutes trying to troubleshoot an issue WE caused despite there actually not being any problem at all besides our own forgetfulness.
I feel like a bloody idiot but at least we know the lever is effective theft prevention!
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Kacy Mechanic AU
Excerpt from a Mechanic AU that I will probably never get around to writing.
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Lucy sighs. After the soda machine ate her change, she's feeling especially thirsty.
The guy in the tow truck said the mechanic at this place did good work and charges fair. All good things, but she hadn't seen them yet. Pulling off her jacket, she tosses it on her chair. From the sound of two voices, she's guessing her wait is over. A guy angrily walks in front of the garage followed by a woman in coveralls.
"The dealership didn't quote me nearly as much!" shouts the guy. The woman in coveralls stops.
"When did you see them?"
"Four months ago when the grinding sound started." The blonde mechanic raises an eyebrow.
"Your car is known for being hard on it's brake parts. Attempting to race in it is stupid. It wasn't made for it. Now you've lost brake power too. At this point they're so damaged that the only way to fix it is to replace them entirely. Feel free to take it back to the dealership for another quote. My price will seem reasonable in comparison."
"No way am I letting some amateur grease monkey like you touch my car! And I do fine racing!"
"Your bumpers and wheel wells say otherwise, but that's not my problem. Get your brakes fixed. Eventually, you'll need to bring your car to a stop again and you won't be able to for much longer." The blonde tosses his keys to him and he storms off. The mechanic shakes her head and head into the garage. Only to come to an abrupt stop when she spots her. Lucy finds the way she shuts her eyes and grimaces adorable. "How can I help you?"
"Hi, I got towed in earlier. I have no idea what's wrong with it, but lots of the dashboard lights went off right before it died. All of them I think?" The mechanic smirks at her.
"Well, if you bring your keys, I'm sure we can figure it out." Lucy bites her lip.
"Um, I see you as more of a mechanic than just a grease monkey... Actually, I don't know the difference. But, I do have to point out that you've got a monkey on the patch under your name." The mechanic's face softens.
"My brother put it there before his first tour. I'm Kate" says the blonde with a charming smile as she points to her name patch.
"Lucy" she answers with a smile and an extended hand. Kate starts to reach for it, but then pulls back and raises her hand to show them covered in oil and other grime.
"Let's go see what's wrong with your car."
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everytime someone mentions mechanics i get sad thinking abt how daniel larusso was born to be a grease monkey yelling at people because they don't change their oil often enough and overcharging them and they have stolen his destiny from him
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Princess Hellfire | Part 2
Part Two | Masterlist
Summary: Senior Year is a weird one...
Warnings: set season 1, canon-typical violence, eddies dad worked at Hawkins lab in 79, parental death, mourning, crying, coming out, making out, love confessions, bullying, fighting, homophobia, internalized homophobia, angst, underage drug use (weed) (let me know if i missed anything)
Word Count: 7k
“Can I have five bucks?” Eddie asks Wayne, first thing on his first day of senior year.
He nods, handing him a fiver and returning to his newspaper and coffee, “whatcha need it for?”
“Schools doing hotdogs and drinks for the first day,” he waves it off, placing two waffles in the toaster and waiting impatiently beside it.
“I think I’m going to ask Y/N to be my girlfriend, today,” he announces, nervous, but needing an outlet to get his confidence back.
“Really?” Wayne’s so excited for him, “it’s about time. You’ve been seeing her, for what? 4 months?”
“We’ve been a bit more than friends since May…”
So much has happened since then. The whole summer happened and they were both so incredibly busy. They barely saw each other during the day, which meant that after work they got to hang out together… and they did everything they could when they were free.
Y/N worked at Benny’s Burgers, she was the best waitress the town has had in years. They could never ever keep a girl there, people always said it was cause benny was too pushy, he was a hard person to work for, but Y/N found it quite the opposite. She said working for him was easy if you listened to the rules on the first day. She memorized the table numbers, she knew the menu like the back of her hand, she cleaned everything to a level greater than what was expected, and benny loved having her there.
Eddie on the other hand, he worked at the auto shop downtown, he used all the things he learned when his parents were stealing cars and applied it to fixing trucks for the redneck assholes he went to school with… for guys who think they’re tough, they always pay with daddy’s credit cards… They were also so rude to him when he did it, he was a grease monkey to them, he was the scum of the earth and people hated when he was the only one available to change their oil or put air in their tires.
On nights when he went to her work to have dinner on Wednesday nights and take her home after her shift, he watched the town gawk over her. All the old ladies told her she was beautiful, the old men tipped her and all the kids having dinner with their families were enamoured by her.
She was so attentive, she was kind and outgoing and wonderful.
Sometimes it really made him wonder what she saw in him… more importantly, he wondered if she saw anything good in him at all because he wasn’t the greatest influence on her as of late.
This summer they went bridge jumping together in an illegal spot by the quarry. They smoked weed together for the first time out by lovers lake. She snuck out a few times to go to parties with him at Reefer Ricks, only to take care of him when he got drunk, she got him home to Wayne and then walked to her own in the middle of the night… all alone… not his proudest moment.
The proudest would probably be when he brought her to a Corroded Coffin rehearsal and made Gareth teach her how to play the drums. Gareth wasn’t too happy about it after the fact, because even on her first try she was better than him. She loved it, she went so far as to even audition for the school band so that she could spend more time with Eddie after class when the semester started again.
This year he was starting the first semester with home economics, wood shop, English and Art. It wasn’t too hard to pass, but the added help from Y/N was definitely going to make it easier.
“How are you gonna ask her?” Wayne pried.
“They’re selling drinks, right, so I’m going to get her an orange crush and say like it’s been obvious I have a crush on you, would you like to be my girlfriend instead… or whatever, I don’t know yet,” He gets all embarrassed, turning pink and keeping his head down.
“I’m sure she’ll say yes, I have a feeling she’s very smitten for you, Eds,” he takes a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket, taps it on the table and flips the carton open. “Want one?”
“Seriously?” He panics a bit, he knew that Wayne knew he smoked, he just never thought he’d be so open about it.
He nods “thanks.”
“No problem,” Wayne hands him one before placing another between his own lips. Eddie uses a lighter from within his jacket pocket to light his, he grabs his waffles and waves Wayne a goodbye and hits the road.
He hops in his van, overjoyed to have a vehicle of his own now. It was a really interesting story about how he got it… he didn’t have to pay a single penny for it, he simply went to Y/N’s house one day after school and learned that her uncle passed away and left everything to his brother, Y/N’s dad.
That included a beat-up old van, it was dark green with a white stripe. The seats were cloth, they carried the smell of cigarettes and wet dog, it was nothing a thorough cleaning couldn’t fix.
“It’ll probably sell for around $1300, I could put some signs up at the plant,” Mr. Y/L/N explained to his wife as Eddie and Y/N walked into the kitchen.
“What’s going on?”
“Sweetie, it’s not a good time,” her mother tried to rush her out of the room, not wanting her to be upset.
“No, no, she’s old enough to stay,” her dad counters. “Remember how your uncle Norman passed away a few months ago and left me his van well… you know what, I know what we can do with it now, honey.”
“What?” Both Y/N and her mom look at him confused but he stares right at Eddie.
“Do you have your licence, son?”
Eddie nods, “yes sir, I do…”
“Would you like a free van?”
“Are you kidding me?” Eddies jaw dropped to the floor. “Free?”
He nods, “I have no use to it, I don’t need to profit off my brother's passing, and at least this way it basically stays in the family if you’re going to be driving my daughter around all the time.”
“Oh, absolutely,” he had no doubt about that.
“Good, I have to pick it up in Illinois on Monday, you can drive it home.”
The bond he had with Y/N’s family only got stronger after that.
Every day Y/N brought him a sandwich and gave it to him before he dropped her off, she even wrote Eddie on the paper bag with a heart over the dot in the i.
He was allowed to have dinner with them most nights, except the first Wednesday of each month because her dad was hosting his book club which included Bob from Radio Shack and the middle school science teacher…
Her dad was a strange man, but then again, Eddie felt very strange himself, so it was a no-brainer that they’d get along so well.
He made a deal to pick Y/N up every morning for school in exchange for the van, and of course, he was already running late on their first day. He turns off Kerley onto Cornwallace. He’s careful around all the stop signs and school zones, he waits behind a few busses on Elm, but he finally pulls up to Y/N’s house with 10 minutes to spare.
She’s waiting on the sidewalk with her arms crossed, “I thought I told you that every time you light one of those you lose 7 years off your life.”
“And I told you I’m here for a good time, not a long time, princess,” he teases as she walks around the van and opens the passenger door herself.
She tosses her books in, puts her backpack on the floor and then jumps into her seat. It was so funny watching her try and get in without flashing him and the whole neighbourhood. “seatbelt.”
“You first,” she protests. Waiting for him to put it on before she pulls at her own and clips it into place.
“You’re in a mood today…”
“I still have a big decision to make,” she sighs, leaning back against the headrest.
“Cheerleading or Sr. Editor at the paper… decisions, decisions,” he mocks her. “How will you ever pick?”
She shoves him and he pretends to swerve, making her grip his leather jacket, “Eddie!”
“Don’t hit me then!”
“Ugh!” She gets even more frustrated. “Why can’t you take this seriously? I know you don’t give a rat's ass about graduating this year, but I need at least 1 stellar extra credit activity to put on my college applications and being the drummer for the school band won’t cut it alone.”
“How are you seriously going to drum, cheer and report the pep rally’s all at the same time?” He laughs at first but then he realizes just how serious she is.
“Don’t you want to be a journalist? Are you seriously thinking that cheerleading is going to wow the old men reading those applications over the amazing work you do as an editor? No. Not unless you hem the skirt up 3 more inches and give them a special performance…”
“Ew,” she knows he’s right though. “What if everyone hates me for jumping right to the senior editor when I just got here last year?”
“Then fuck ‘em!” He attempts to inspire her. “Seriously, babe, there’s a reason why Mrs. Ford picked you, and if she likes you and she’s grading your work and she's writing your letter of recommendation, then it doesn’t matter what the kids have to say about it.”
His lips curl into a smile, “did you just call me babe?”
He goes white as a ghost, keeping his eyes on the road but they grow impossibly wide. “Did I? Huh… I guess I did.”
She stares at him quietly as he continues their drive to school, it’s such a short trip but that didn’t stop either of them from wanting more time together.
When he pulls into his regular spot and throws the car in park, he turns to her, finally. “What?”
“Am I going to have to be the one to ask it, seriously,” she whispers.
“Ask what?” He doesn’t know where she’s going even though it was blatantly obvious.
“Ask me out.”
“Oh! Oh, y-yeah, I mean no?” he thinks about it. “No you don’t have to ask, yes I’m going to do it, I have a plan…”
“You have a plan?” She teases him.
He nods, “at yearbook distribution, I have something for you.”
She smiles, wide and toothy, “okay, alright, well… I guess I’ll see you then?”
“You don’t want me to walk you to class?” He gets all pouty.
“I don’t have class this today,” she smirks and opens her door, she hops out and gathers her things. “Yearbook kids get the morning off to hand out class schedules and make sure the new kids are where they need to be and as a reward, we get the afternoon off.”
“Boring,” Eddie adds quickly.
“Better than home ec,” she slams his door and he immediately gets out and follows her into the school.
“Is it though? Because when I finish sewing buttons onto all the pillows I have to make, you’re going to be so jealous I didn’t make it for you.”
She laughs, filling him with pride as he follows her through the hallway and towards her locker. Everyone watches them together, the Freak and the Geek. He felt bad that she got that nickname simply for being near him and good at science, it made him want to beat people up when he heard it, but she wouldn’t let him.
He leans against her locker, glancing down the hallway at Steve Harrington doing the exact same thing to Nancy Wheeler. He points over in their direction, “can you believe they’re together…”
“No, it’s weird,” she whispers. “He’s in our grade, she’s a sophomore. Just cause he’s taken almost everyone's v card in our year doesn’t mean he can go through all the other grades now.”
“I don’t know, I think he might actually like her,” he shrugs. “They’re so cuddly together.”
“So are we?” she doesn’t see anything wrong with that.
“Yeah, but we’re also basically dating,” he says it before his brain can catch up. “I mean— come on you know we’re more than friends.”
“We are,” she smiles up at him and grabs the collar of his jacket, pulling him in closer until their noses touch. “And yet you still haven’t kissed me on the lips.”
He shakes his head and pulls back, “uh-uh.”
She pouts, “fine. But if you don’t ask, I’m going to become a cheerleader and end up dating someone like Jeremy Carver…”
Just the thought of her dating anyone in the Carver family made his blood boil. They were the basketball family that was apparently going to bring the championship back to Hawkins with their new generation of strong blonde boys… it made him think they came from Nazi Germany to Hawkins after the war.
Jeremy was in their grade, Jason was a sophomore with Nancy Wheeler, and there was another Carver in middle school, probably raising hell there too.
“Oh god, no, ew, please don’t,” he can’t even fathom that, it makes his stomach turn, “do you want to be my girlfriend? Quick, yes or no?”
She laughs, looping her arms around his neck and looking into his eyes, “yeah, Edward, I guess I’ll be your girlfriend.”
He can’t control his smile, eyes flicking to her own, he places a hand on her cheek and guides her in for the first kiss of many. Their lips touch ever so gently smiles still formed on their face, unable to relax now that they’ve found true happiness.
“Excuse me,” he whispers against her lips and steps away so he can make a scene, “excuse me! Attention everyone!”
Of course, has to make a scene.
He locks eyes with Harrington and shoots him a wink.
“I just want to make it clear, to everyone here at Hawkins Hell Hole, that, Y/N Y/L/N is my fair lady and I will not hesitate to duel anyone who attempts to take her from me!”
“Eddie!” She scolds him,
“No one wants her!” Someone yells from the back of the crowd now assembling.
“Who said that?” Eddie follows the voice, walking chaotically towards it and kids scramble, displaying the one, the only, Jason Carver at the back. “Wanna try saying that again, hot shot? What, do you think cause you can throw a ball in a basket, what? like 23% of the time, that you’re the be all end all of the school?”
He gets flustered, unable to ever fight back when Eddie looked him square in the face.
“That’s what I thought,” Eddie laughs in his face. “You throw balls because you don’t have any of your own…”
Jason throws the first punch and Eddie catches it in his big hand, squeezing as tight as he can, Jason throws his other fist. Eddie holds them both in front of him, squeezing so tight that he can’t hold his arms up anymore, Jason’s face trembles, he wants to cry out in pain but he’s embarrassed.
Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson was embarrassing him in front of everyone.
“Break it up, break it up,” Mrs. Ford comes pushing through and makes the boys part from one another. “What’s going on here?”
“Jason was bullying the geek and then threw a punch at the freak,” a geeky little nerd from the crowd explains, pushing his glasses up.
“Do you want to get hit next?” Eddie turns to them. “Stop fucking calling her that! She’s smarter than all you fuckers, she’s going to go to Notre Dame and she’s going to get her journalism degree and you fuck heads are going to have to see her on CNN every night at 6pm for the rest of your lonely lives saying ‘I wish I had been nicer to the geek’ well Fuck That! Be nice to her now! She’s the best fucking person to go to this school, but no one would know that because you saw her with me and immediately thought something was wrong with her! It's you!!! Something is wrong with all of you!!”
“Mr. Munson!” The principal caught the end of his grand speech. “While your statement is profound, that is not the language we use in this school.”
“Oh but the years of every kid in here calling me a queer was fine to you? I say fuck and I’m the bad guy?”
“Mr. Munson that’s enough!” He raises his voice louder. “Follow me.”
“You’re going to suspend me on my first day for standing up for my girlfriend getting bullied?” He laughs, following anyway. “Sick… just fucking sick.”
—
Eddie was given an in-school suspension, kicked out of the marching band and told if he misbehaves again they might make him retake the whole year just to teach him a lesson… it made her wonder what other colourful words he chose to use in the principal's office.
She went to the yearbook classroom for orientation, being senior editor she was in charge of delegating responsibilities, leaving just her and Nancy Wheeler alone in the classroom.
Nancy Wheeler sat quietly in the back corner near the large paper slicer, organizing newsletters about yearbook sales. But she kept glancing over at Y/N every few minutes.
She could feel Nancy’s eyes burning a hole in the back of her head like she was trying to read her thoughts or something. She turned to Wheeler, watching her look away and pretend it was nothing, more than once, and then she finally went over.
“What?”
“Huh?” Nancy looked up at her with faux innocence.
“You’re staring. What’s up?” She repeats.
“Oh,” she brushes her hair behind her ear and gets nervous. “I just… I wanted to know if you’ve picked a junior editor yet, you know, 'cause you’re going to need to do that soon for Mrs. Ford.”
“I thought you were going to ask about Eddie,” she shakes her head with a sigh and takes a seat beside Nancy. “People always think I’m crazy for being his best friend… well, girlfriend now, I guess.”
“I’m just surprised… that’s all.”
“Why?” Y/N genuinely wanted to know.
“You’re like me, you care about your grades and going to college and Eddie’s… colourful?” Thats the nicest way she could’ve put it. “And plus, there was a rumour going around that you two fucked in his van in the back parking lot this summer, I heard that from Tommy…”
“What?” She looks horrified. “Oh my god, no, no, we haven’t,” she shakes her head horrified that people would even say that. “I haven’t… ever…”
“Me either,” Nancy lets out a shaky breath. “I think Steve wants to though…”
“He’s a boy,” she gives her a knowing look. “If you don't want to, don’t. If you feel like he’s making you, kick his ass.”
She nods, “I wouldn’t let him… I’m pretty strong when I need to be.”
“Me too,” she smiles, feeling Nancy’s vibe and warming up to her quite easily. She reminds her a lot of herself when she sat down in science last year, so she takes a chance on her “you can be my junior editor, I feel like if you’re in Steves circle and I’m in Eddie’s, we can learn everything in this school… and this way I can still be in the band for the pep rally’s and you can do the physical reporting for me?”
Nancy smiles back, putting her hand in the middle of them for a shake, “you’ve got a deal.”
—
There’s a new girl in band, she comes prepared with a trumpet and a smile and keeps glancing over at Y/N. And she’s very cute.
It makes her panic, Eddies only in the stands watching on as they practice since he can’t join them… Her mind wandered all over the place, she was anxious that he’d notice the glances and the smiles and the fact that every time they rearrange to find the best flow for everyone to perform at their best, they keep getting closer and closer to each other.
“Hi,” she leans over and whispers near her ear, “I’m Robin.”
“Y/N,” she smiles back. “Are you new?”
She shakes her head, “to Hawkins, no, but to this band, yes. I’m a sophomore, I haven’t been here that long and I was tired of hiding cause I didn’t have friends so I just joined on a whim… sorry, I didn’t know what you meant so I kinda just said both answers anyway and then that happened…”
“That’s okay,” she stifles a laugh, trying to stay quiet while the teacher tries to talk them through the new choreography for the football games. “It was cute.”
It was only the first week of school, and their teacher couldn’t expect a group of teenagers to listen to her after 2 months away from school.
Robin blushes and looks away, bringing her trumpet back to her lips and pretending to play along as her lips wouldn’t cooperate to actually play. Meanwhile, Y/N carried on with her snare drum. The cheerleaders did flips in the background, balls are thrown and “hut hut!” Is yelled repeatedly, there’s so much going on in their small field for an early September afternoon.
The turnout for tryouts was wild, ’83 was their year.
After practice, she waves to Robin and heads over to Eddie on the bleachers. “Hey, princess,” he kisses the side of her head as he wraps his arm around her. “Who’s that?” He gestures towards them with the lift of his chin in her direction.
“Robin, she’s new. To band, not Hawkins, she’s in Wheeler’s grade.” She keeps her head down and avoids eye contact with him, almost ashamed of her slight attraction to her.
“What’s up?” He catches it.
“Hm?” She finally looks up at him, guilty as all hell. “Nothing.”
“Okay then,” he laughs it off and tugs her along for their walk back over to his van.
She’s quiet most of the way home, well, back to eddies place. She mostly just lets him talk, explaining how hard it was to not snap at the principal. He had an in-school suspension for the rest of the week, he’d be doing all his school work in the office, alone, without even a break for lunch.
“Well, I’m going to be bringing your lunch in every day and if they don’t let me sit with you there will be hell to pay,” she complains. “Because today I had lunch with Nancy Wheeler… and when I tell you it was weird, thats an understatement.”
“Why?” He can’t believe what she said.
“She’s going to be my junior editor, I figured I’d need someone to take game notes while I play and she should get a decent amount of gossip off Harrington and his weird-ass friends.”
“That’s actually so smart,” he compliments with a beautiful smile, putting her back at ease.
Feelings are weird, but she knows for sure she loves him more than anyone who could ever enter her life.
It isn’t until he’s parking out front of his trailer that he talks to her again. “Seriously? Is something going on?”
She shakes her head, faking a smile. “I’m just tired. I’m not used to getting up this early anymore.”
“Okay,” he tries to believe her, but he can’t. “You mind if I smoke? I don’t have to drive you home till later, anyway?”
She nods, “yeah, I don’t mind, just, can I go lay down while you do it out here?”
He nods and hands her the keys, “head on in.”
And she does just that, watching him take his secret stash out from under the steps and head to the back f the trailer so no one would see him.
She gets a few minutes alone in his room, and she goes right to tidying to ease her anxieties. She has cleaned his room with him before, she’s done his laundry in with her own after getting caught in the rain, and she’s even showered at his place before. She felt very safe and comfortable with him as if this was her home too.
She goes to make his bed, she moves the pillow to fluff it and finds something she never expected.
“Heavy Metal,” she reads the title of the magazine aloud as she picks it up, noticing the naked woman riding a Pegasus into battle with a large sword and huge tits. It’s exciting to her, it feels wrong to be able to see something so graphic just out in the open… she flips through the pages, breathing heavily, her heart almost beating out of her chest.
She hears the screen door open and she throws the magazine back down onto the bed, covers it with a pillow and sits down before he gets into the room.
He comes running in and jumps into the bed, tackling her down and tickling her stomach, she laughs, screeching for him to stop but he doesn’t, “my girl needs giggles! Doctors orders!”
“Eddie!”
He stops and looks down at her with a sweet smile, “you know I’m always here if you want to talk?”
She reaches under the pillow and pulls it out, handing it to him. “this…”
“How did you know about this?” His face goes white as a ghost, and he sits on his knees with a look of shame.
“I don’t care that you have it… I care that I like it…”
“Oh? oh!” He finally gets it and then his eyes narrow in on her, “oh…”
“Eddie, I’m being serious, it’s weird, I feel like I’m cheating on you and all because I keep noticing women being pretty now that we’re together… why didn’t this happen before we got together?”
“I find dudes hot,” he shrugs, admitting something just as scary to even the playing field. “Like today Harrington looked really nice, I even winked at him.”
“You didn’t?” She smacks his arm. “Seriously?”
“It’s the hair,” he shrugs. “What can I say, us men with good hair, we’re hot.”
She laughs, “I think I just like nice people… like robin today, she was so smiley and she kept wanting to stand with me and it reminded me of you, honestly.”
“Are you saying I’m cute and smiley?” He thinks about it, “no one has ever used those words to describe me.”
She pulls him in for a hug and then a cuddle, he snuggles into her chest and wraps his arms around her middle. “I think it's normal to find people cute, it’s not wrong, it only becomes a problem if you hide it from me or it stops you from liking me anymore…”
“That could never happen,” she assures him, smoothing her hand over his back, she presses a kiss to his head. “You’re my home, Eddie. No one can replace you.”
“Good,” he smiles, she can feel his happy cheeks against her chest. “Cause you’re never getting rid of me.”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Guess what I learned today?” She whispers.
“What?”
“Tommy and his dips hit girlfriend are telling people we fucked in the van, parked at the school this summer.”
He sits up and looks down at her, “are you serious?”
She nods, “Nancy told me. I think she just wanted to talk about sex cause Steve might be pressuring her…”
“I should give him a talk,” Eddie mumbles. “That’s not cool.”
“I told her to kick his ass if he tries anything, I think she could,” she tries to make Eddie smile and gets a laugh instead.
“We could team up and all kick his ass, too,” Eddie suggests. “I think it would be hot to see you kick someone's ass…”
“Yeah?” She raises her brows, “how high are you right now?”
“My usual amount, I’m just allowed to tell you my thoughts now… my girlfriend should know I think she’s the most beautiful person in the world.”
Her heart swells, “and I can finally tell you that you’re hot… I’ve been telling you that you’re handsome, so I guess I need to kick it up a notch now.”
“And I can do this now,” he places his hand on her cheek and leans in for a kiss.
His lips are soft as he presses against hers, breathing in deeply through his nose and relaxing against her. She rests her hands on his hips and tries to spread her legs to let him settle between her as the kiss heats up. It was the first time she really kissed a boy… and it was everything she thought it would be.
—
September 6th comes around again like it did every year, and every year it got a little bit easier… but losing his dad was never going to be okay. It was never going to be normal.
After his mom left and stealing cars landed him in prison for a few years, his dad became a security guard for the Hawkins Lab.
He died during a security breach at the Lab, Eddie will never know the specifics, but he knew it was horrific. His father wasn’t in any condition to be seen afterwards, the lab actually paid for his cremation and he now sits in a little urn on the table beside the tv.
When no one was home, sometimes Eddie would walk over, press a kiss to his forefingers and gently press it to the top of the urn and tell him he missed him… sometimes he would even tell his dad whole stories about his day, sitting down on the carpeted floor of his uncle's trailer for hours just catching up with the jar of his ashes.
Today, however, just pressing a kiss to the top of his eternal container wasn’t enough. He felt extra sad this year because so much was different. This year he has a girlfriend and this year he graduates… those are two very big things and he’s not going to be home for them.
He’s been home for a few hours, after dinner with Y/N she had family time and that meant he had to go. Sometimes she called him at night before bed, but most nights he just sat alone in his room while Wayne was at work.
Wayne always takes the 6th off, Eddie knew he’d be home, in the main room, and he knew he’d be willing to talk about it if Eddie opened up to him about his feelings… but when he walks out into the main room, Wayne is sound asleep with the urn tucked under one arm and a bottle of beer in the other hand.
He just picks up his keys, slugs on his coat and quietly leaves the trailer. He doesn’t even know how late it is, it might not even be the 6th anymore, but he needs something… He needs someone.
Someone very specific.
He’s there before he even realizes where he’s going. Pulling into Y/N’s driveway, he notices her bedroom light is still on, and so is her father's study on the first floor. As he gets out and begins his walk towards the porch, the light comes on and her father is opening the door.
“Eddie?”
“Hi, Mr. Y/L/N,” he carries a tune of sadness in his voice that anyone could pick up on.
“Are you alright?”
He nods, trying to stay calm as long as he could but begins to break down the longer he thinks about it. “No…”
Without thinking, her father wraps his arms around him and pulls him into a hug. He rubs his back gently, “it’s okay, son… what’s going on?”
He pulls back and wipes his tears, pulling himself together. “I’m sorry, really, I didn’t mean to come here this late, I just— it’s— my dad died 4 years ago today and in all honesty, I just came here for a hug from Y/N, so, thank you— for the hug, sir.”
“You can head on up to her room,” he lets him in and points up the stairs, “Wayne know you’re here?”
He shakes his head, “he’s not going to notice I’m gone, he’s having a rough night too… only he’s allowed to have booze.”
“You’re welcome to stay here,” he looks him in the eye, acknowledging that he trusts him to stay the night in his home, specifically in his daughter's room. “No funny business, Kyle’s room is also free if you want to sleep there.”
“Thank you, sir,” he pats his shoulder, “I promise, I’d never do anything to ruin the relationship I have with your family. It means a lot to me.”
“Anytime, son.”
With a heavy heart, he kicks off his shoes and heads up the stairs to Y/N’s room. The door is closed, like normal, so he gives it a quiet knock.
“Come in?”
He opens it slowly, “hey, princess.”
She flings the covers off her bed and runs to him, “Eddie? Oh my god?”
He sneaks in and closes the door behind himself just in time to open his arms and catch her. She holds him tightly, it’s everything he wanted and then some. “Hi, my love.”
She pulls back and looks up at him, wiping the residual tears off his cheeks carefully, she’s so concerned, “what’s wrong?”
“Um, let’s go sit down…” he isn’t ready to say it again yet.
She nods, “Yeah, okay.” She takes his hand and drags him over to the bed and that’s when he notices she’s only in a long T-shirt as a nightgown.
“um… your dad said I can stay here, I promised to behave, but um, can I borrow some PJs or would you be okay with me in my underwear and shirt?”
She laughs, “take ‘em off, I’m only in underwear and a shirt, see?” she pulls up the nightgown and flashes a pair of bright yellow granny panties. “It’s not a big deal, it’s the same as a swimsuit.”
She’s not wrong there. He strips down, he gets comfortable and joins her in her big comfy bed. She has so many pillows and the softest blanket, she lays back and lets him cuddle right into her, cheek on her boobs, hand on her tummy, he was in heaven.
“You know how my dad died…”
“I’m still so sorry for your loss, honey, I know it’s not fair,” she pets his ever-growing hair lovingly and then presses a kiss to the top of his head.
“It’s 4 years today.”
“God, I’m sorry, baby,” she says with her lips still touching his head, and then she places a few more kisses and holds him tighter. “I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re going through.”
“I’m just glad I have you this year,” he admits, tearing up again. “And your dad… he gave me a hug too.”
“Really?” She sounds so happy to hear that.
He nods, “you’re my family, Y/N… I— I love you.”
He’s called her ‘my love’ a million times, they both say nothing of it, they don’t take it seriously, but in all seriousness— Eddie was only saying it to test the waters before he told her that he loved her.
They’ve been dating for a week.
A Week.
Sure, they’ve been friends for almost a year and sharing cuddles and secrets and cheek kisses for months now… it still felt weird to admit to her that he was in love with her.
Like enough to make him go insane— levels of in love with her. The kind of love that made him want to be a good person and get good grades to get a good job and be a good husband and one day— god willing— a good father to her kids… their kids.
He’s thought about it so much it seems a bit excessive, but when his head hits the pillow at home, all he can think about is spending the rest of his life with her.
“You love me?”
He pulls back and props himself up on his arm so he can look at her, “Is that okay?”
With both hands she cups his face, “oh, Eddie, I love you too.”
They haven’t kissed on the lips much, but pressing them together feels like coming home. He’s safe in her arms, cocooned in her warm embrace, he melts into the kiss and prolongs the kiss with his tongue.
Making out was new for them but they both found it relatively easy over the last week and very beneficial for their mutual touch-starved hearts. He didn’t mean to grope her, but he rests his free hand on her boob and squeezes gently, invoking a moan from her that threatens the promise he made to her dad.
He pulls back to apologize and she immediately starts apologizing instead, “seriously, I didn’t mean to! It’s just—“
He places his finger over her lips and shushes her with a smile, “if I plan on staying in your dad's good books, I can’t get turned on and do something we both regret later…”
“Okay,” she understands and lets him pull away more, he settles into the pillow beside hers and looks over at her, sweetly.
But sweet is the last thing on her mind.
“Can I ask you something?”
He nods, “always, princess?”
“Do you think I’m hot? Like I know you love me, and so you must like more than just the fact we’re best friends and we have a bond… cause I find you really handsome and dare I say, sexy, even. But— what I’m trying to say is, would you ever want to get physical one day? With me?”
He laughs, which is the exact opposite of what she needed to hear. It makes her brows furrow and he starts backtracking immediately. “Oh my god, no, I didn’t laugh cause I think it’s silly, I laughed cause you really have no idea what you do to me, so you?”
She shakes her head and moves in closer, settling next to him, their faces only inches apart. “So tell me?”
He laughs again and pulls at the neck of his shirt so that it’s not choking him. “Well, for starters, and this is probably going to sound shallow, I only sat down beside you in science ‘cause you were hot and I hadn’t seen you before and I thought maybe if I talked to you first, then you wouldn’t believe anyone else that I was a freak.”
“I’ll personally assassinate everyone who’s called you that,” she jokes, only that’s what he thinks. She feels completely serious about wanting revenge on the fuckers that made her man feel like this.
“I think being in love with you makes me find you more attractive than I ever did when I first saw you.”
“How?” She seems a little confused.
“I think it’s beautiful that you saw me without a lunch and started bringing one for me. I think it’s hot that you get so angry when I talk down about myself. And I think it’s sexy as fuck that you’re here in your underwear making out with me under your daddy’s roof, pretty girl… you’re tempting, but I always keep a promise.”
She basically purrs with excitement, “you’re so hot when you notice the things I do for you and let me keep doing them… cause like, I know you hate when I put hearts on your sandwich bags cause the dudes at work think it’s girly, but you let me do it because it showed you how much I loved you even before I could say it out loud.”
“We’re really dumb,” he laughs, “you know that, right?”
“We have basically been dating since we danced in your trailer and you kissed my forehead,” she teases him. “I think that’s when I fell in love with you for real.”
“When you pinned the ribbon to my jacket,” he admits the moment that got him. “Being granted a lady’s token is not something a knight forgets.”
“Come here,” she pulls him back onto her chest and back to the way they were before. She kisses the top of his head a few times, “I’m so glad you said it, cause going to bed tonight without saying I love you first would be so weird.”
He smirks, “you’re welcome, my love.”
She reaches over to her night table and turns off her light. She settles back in with him and runs her fingers through his hair, “sweet dreams, my Eddie.”
“I love you,” he whispers against her chest.
“I love you, more.”
He lets her think that, but she’ll never know the leaps and bounds he’d go to to prove that to her. He’d go all the way to the ends of the earth for her, all she need do is ask.
They both fall asleep soon after that, peacefully unaware of her dad opening the door before he also heads to bed, carefully he peeks in to see them cuddled together under the blankets, his jeans laying at the foot of her bed, he fit into her life like he was always there. And a part of him hoped he always would be.
eddie munson taglist (ask to be added)
@fightingdragonswithwho @allybatch @mrs-dr-reid @reidselle @kyomito
#eddie munson#eddie munson stranger things#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x fem reader#eddie munson smut#stranger things#eddie munson imagines#eddie munson imagine#stranger things imagine#stranger things season 4
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The Curse of Monkey Island | Part 5
This will be a shorter post as we head into Part 3 of the game, but it includes one of the many big highlights of the game in my opinion.
First, however, I needed to follow that map and find Elaine.
The map is referring to the theatre. When you go on stage, they're already in the midst of their performance to an audience of monkeys. Good on the crew for finding something to do, enjoying what the island has to...offer.
Toward the back of the stage is a mound of dirt with a shovel. There isn't much to do here while the performance is happening.
The map itself is more specifically referring to the light controls above the stage.
The map directions were as follows:
"With all eyes open, follow the path to the X.
South East
North West
West
South
East
Two paces North Easat
East
South West
X Marks the Spot!"
So, I simply needed to press the buttons in the location that matches each cardinal direction then flip the switch. The lights change each time you press and there's a fun little easter egg.
Max light! I have some extra appreciation now that I've played Sam & Max Hit the Road even more so than having only watched the TellTale games. I don't remember what I thought when seeing that before I even knew what Sam & Max was.
Once all the right buttons were pressed in the right order the lights formed an X over the dirt pile.
Of course I couldn't do much when the play was still on. Stepping back onto the stage led to Slappy Cromwell's juggling act.
"Is this a dagger I see before me? No, it's three!"
And in the prop room, the travel trunk was now open, revealing a load of cannonballs that would be used next for the juggling act, "The famous 'Cannonball Juggling' scene from Romeo and Juliet."
What's a little sabotage, right? There are two options for the cannonballs: the chicken grease or the cooking oil. I tend to go for the grease, but it really doesn't matter and this time I used the oil just for the change of pace.
Juggling slippery cannonballs goes about as well as you'd expect and he drops them and one flips one of the wood slats of the stage, launching Cromwell into the other actor sending them both off stage. The monkey audience were ecstatic. Standing ovation.
That cleared the stage and I was able to dig Elaine up and she was stored in the ship's crowsnest.
With Elaine found and a ship, map, and crew acquired, that brings an end to Part II.
Time for Part III and one of my many favourite bits in the game coming up.
"Part III Three Sheets to the Wind"
Things very briefly started off peaceful enough, sailing the sea, while the crew chatters. Then a ship approached.
And of course it was our ol' pal, Captain Rottingham.
He wanted my map to Blood Island, so he could get the diamond there--some details Guybrush should have kept to himself back in the barbershop, but it's too late now.
It was time for a duel. This is a major callback to The Secret of Monkey Island with insult sword fighting, except they're on the sea, so the insults have to rhyme.
Rottingham tosses out a couple insults in what's essentially a tutorial but of course I didn't have the correct responses yet, so I lost and Rottingham takes the map.
That gross skin tattoo map... Rottingham was also grossed out. This is what he gets for stealing.
But that leaves us stranded. Guybrush was raring to go get that map back but the crew have another idea first...
It's time! It's time for the pirate song!
youtube
It's ridiculous, I love it so. This was another song dad recorded on tape for listening to while driving. We'd always get a kick out of it and sometimes he'd sing along to parts.
There are a few things from the series as a whole that are just embedded in my brain by this point:
This song
"Hmm...no."
"Ohhh there's a monkey in my pocket and he's stealing all my change! His stare is blank and glassy I suspect that he's deraaanged"
"I think it was a conspiracy. And if there's one type of piracy I don't like it's CONS-piracy." (generally paraphrased when I think of it but from Secret)
"It's a whole bucket of mud. And it's mine...all mine!" (from Monkey Island 2. I dunno why, it just stuck)
Anyway, once the song ended with an orange, it was down to business.
On the ship deck there are two main things to interact with aside from talking to Haggis for a bit of guidance:
-Cannons - they're weak
-The map: how we move!
The whole point of this section is to fight other pirates and learn insults as well earn treasure. Ships will move around the map and when you click one your ship will sail over and initiate ship combat where you fire at each other with cannons.
You just want to avoid Rottingham of course because you can't beat him until you gather some insults and more powerful cannons.
There's an easy mode and a harder mode. I always go for easy ship combat as I'm not really a big a fan of that bit.
You want to earn treasure to buy new and better cannons at Puerto Pollo where...
Kenny has given up his lemonade scam and is now running guns! He's supplied from 'Bob's Big Bore Boomer Brand Cannon, Inc.'
"Can I interest you in some shrapnelizing ammunition designed to bring exquisite pain and unreasonable suffering to all your enemies?"
He's got the:
Buccaneer's Buddy
Ouch-Master
Holemaker Deluxe
Paingiver 2000
Mr. Massacre
Destructomatic T-47
Basically: beat a pirate in ship combat, insult sword fight, if you win, get treasure and go spend it, if you lose and still have treasure they take your booty, and hopefully you learn more insults and replies along the way.
Some samples:
"You're as repulsive as a monkey in a negligee." (one of the two you start with courtesy of Rottingham)
"I look THAT much like your fiancée?"
"Throughout the Caribbean my great deeds are celebrated!"
"Too bad they're all fabricated."
"I'll skewer you, like a sow at a buffet."
"When I'm done with YOU, you'll be a boneless fillet!"
I got all the cannon upgrades and most of the insults. I tried to get them all, but the one I was missing just wasn't coming up and you don't need them all, so I gave up.
I also accidentally ran into a tourist ship and freaked them out, but I was nice and skedaddled.
It was time to face Captain Rottingham and with my shiny new Destructomatic T-47
and easy mode, I took him down with ease and boarded.
Rottingham, like the Sword Master in the first game, has a different set of insults, so you need to figure out which of your stocked up replies will work.
"You'll find I'm dogged and relentless to my prey!"
"Then be a good dog. Sit! Stay!"
There are several rounds and you don't have to get every single one right. I did miss one because I didn't have the reply, but otherwise it was smooth sailing and down he went.
Guybrush continues to rhyme every response to Rottingham's comments while Rottingham suffers. It's great. For example:
"You win! You win! You'll get your map back!"
"You were doomed from the start, you kleptomaniac!"
"All right! All right! I give up already!"
"It's no wonder you lost with a sword so unsteady!"
But all good things come to an end and Guybrush gets the map and returns the ship.
Leading to Part IV: The Bartender, The Thieves, his Aunt, and Her Lover.
And another cutscene as the ship sails off into the sunset, victorious and ready to find Blood Island.
Until a vicious storms hits.
And they can't keep control of the ship, though even the crew actually attempts to help this time...mostly. Haggis was preoccupied with his kilt....and high winds...Y'know, not the best combination.
They end up crashing on shore, but on the shore of Blood Island!
Unfortunately, while everyone is intact, the ship is less so and Haggis informs Guybrush that they're staging a mutiny.
It was a real pleasure serving as his crew, but the voice of the siren is calling them back to cut her hair. They want to return to being barbers. Not much Guybrush can do to protest and all in all a pretty amicable mutiny.
And as for Elaine she got thrown from the crowsnest and landed a little ways off.
Nothing more to do but start exploring, find Elaine, and learn about this diamond ring.
Next time: Blood Island. I love Blood Island!
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embarrassment at the grease monkey (I can’t remember the last time I got my oil changed)
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does being raised by a mechanic give me clout in the supernatural fandom? does knowing how to change oil give me clout in the supernatural fandom? does knowing what kind of wrench a man wants from his toolbox and being able to grab it and bring it to him give me clout in the supernatural fandom? surely the wealth of knowledge in my brain of horrible filthy grotesque humor from the grease monkeys at the auto shop will give me a clout in the supernatural fandom.

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Colorado Springs Oil Change
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Are you cladding a gondola bushel result? For around railcar repairs you sack do the speculate yourself if you wealthy person around knowledge some automobile upkeep. If you are turn to a professional, it is authoritative to roll in the hay how to discovery the C. H. Best price from a reputable grease monkey. Translate these tips to discover more than.
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'Manic Mechanic.'
The following is a story about a very dodgy mechanic.
I am a very happy young camper who has just passed my driving test and even better my father has just bought me a an old bright blue Toyota Corolla that despite having a lousy sound system I loved that little car.
That car gave me the freedom to go wherever I wanted to whenever I wanted to and I must admit that I don't know anything about dip sticks, radiators or how to put air in the tyres.
Six months later while I was driving around a little red oil can appeared on the dashboard.
At home I told my father about the oil can and he had a little chuckle 'Son that means that your car is getting low on oil, all you have to do is take your car to a mechanic to and have an oil change plus get a service while you are there.'
'I have always taken my cars to Bill's Auto Services behind the shopping centre at Glendale, they will look after you.'
I give the auto shop a ring and book my car in for the following Tuesday.
When I arrive I tell the mechanic about the oil light 'All I want done today is an oil change and a service.'
He tells me that the customers needs always come and assures that only an oil change and service will be done and the total cost will be $159.
I am happy will that price and walk away wondering what to do with myself for the next four hours, I finally decide to go and watch a movie.
Just as I settle in to watch 'Fast & Furious 5 my phone pings apparently Bill has found a problem with the rear brakes of my Corolla, they need bleeding and the disc's need grinding.
I don't what bleeding or grinding brakes means plus everybody knows that mechanic's are not exactly trustworthy so I text back and tell Bill that all I asked for was an oil change and service so the brakes will have to wait until next time.
Bill texts back 'As well as the brakes your ball joints are worn and the rotor cuffs need replacing.'
Is this guy for real? Does he have trouble understanding basic English?
Or he is actually being truthful? because he is a mechanic after all.
I reply in uppercase 'ONLY AN OIL CHANGE AND A SERVICE NOTHING MORE.'
For the next two hours while I watch Vin Diesel do the impossible my palms sweat profusely and my nerves are completely shot as I worry what that crazy grease monkey is doing to my Corolla.
Bill is obviously one spanner short of a toolkit.
A few slices short of a loaf.
You get the drift.
As the credits roll my phone pings again, I wonder who this could be?
'As well as the ball joints, rotor cuffs and brakes your tyres need rotating plus the clutch is a little sloppy.'
Which is strange because my car is an automatic.
I text back 'JUST AN OIL CHANGE A SERVICE MOTHERFUCKER.'
My phone remains silent as I eat a bacon cheeseburger for lunch so hopefully the manic mechanic has got the message but just in case he hasn't I send the asshole a new message 'I will only pay for an oil change and a service and any unauthorized work done on my Corolla will remain unpaid for and if you continue to do any other unnecessary work I will report you to the Mechanics Board of Integrity.
I am fairly sure that this board doesn't exist.
But it sounds good.
Thirty seconds later Bill replies 'As well as the ball joints, rotor cuffs, brake overhaul, tyre rotation and the sticky clutch Your transmission is fucked and seeing that I am a nice person I will throw in a set of wiper blades for free.'
Jesus this mechanic is such a dipstick.
I hope his face gets caught in the fanbelt or exhaust pipe.
As you can imagine I was feeling a little apprehensive as I went to confront Bill face to face.
When I walk Bill approaches me wiping his hands on an old oily rag.
This fruit loop of a mechanic has a nasty look on his face as the wanders over to the front office and returns with the bill.
When I read the total I realize that I was worrying about nothing and I smile in relief $159 is all I am being charged so I reach for my wallet but Bill's voice stops me 'Keep reading.'
So I continue looking over the bill and it is a lengthy tome but when I reach the bottom I almost jump out of my skin TOTAL COST$ 3487 plus GST.
'$ 3487 you must be out of your freaking mind.'
'Plus GST young man after all I am a reputable business man so I must pay my taxes.'
You can shove this piece of paper up your fat ass because I am not paying you a single cent, see you in court asswipe.'
Bill reaches behind the counter and now he is swinging a baseball bat 'Are you sure young fellow because this bat will break a lot of bones and put you in hospital for a few months.'
I take a step back and I am ashamed to say I peed myself a little.
'Ah that's Ok I am sure that we can come to some sort of agreement.'
Bill hands me another piece of paper 'I almost forgot this.'
Expecting another bill I open the folded piece of paper YOU HAVE BEEN PRANKED.
My father steps out from behind a car laughing his head off 'Well done Bill, see you at the pub later on.
I pay the $159 and follow my father vowing revenge.
THE END.
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How to Successfully Possess an Auto Repair Service
Auto repair is an industry that offers a wonderful way for you to earn money. With a variety of various jobs available, there is something for everyone. You can work as an oil change specialist, a diesel auto mechanic or even an aeronautics technician. Auto mechanics require to be educated concerning the different tools as well as equipment they utilize. They also need to be able to interact with customers on a specific basis to explain lorry issues.
To be a grease monkey, you require to finish a training program or apprenticeship and get licensed by the Automotive Service Excellence (ASE). There are 58 ASE accreditation examinations in several various series. You can obtain ASE qualification at any one of the lots of technological institutes or colleges that use auto mechanics training programs. As soon as you have completed the essential education and learning, it is time to find a work in the field of car repair work. Get more info here about the best melbourne auto service.
You can start by discovering a work in a car dealership or a personal repair shop. You can also discover work at a garage or car parts store. If you have an interest in working as an auto mechanic, think about going back to school for a professional or associate degree program. These programs are much more considerable as well as can give you with the additional training you need to become a certified mechanic. It is additionally crucial to comprehend the most up to date technologies as well as repair service methods. Click here for more info about the best melbourne oil change service.
This can assist you prevent pricey mistakes, which can conserve you money as well as your reputation as a grease monkey. The most vital thing to remember is to remain safe whatsoever times, specifically when you're working with gas or chemicals that are extremely combustible. Make certain that your work environment is well ventilated which you're always wearing the ideal security equipment. You need to also see to it that your shop is properly insured and that your residential or commercial property is protected against any kind of unanticipated occasions that might occur. This can consist of a natural catastrophe or an accident that includes a client or employee.
As a company owner, it is crucial to maintain in-depth documents of your revenue, expenses, assets and liabilities. This details will enable you to better examine your economic efficiency gradually and will certainly additionally ensure that you submit yearly taxes much more effectively. Another vital element of running a car fixing business is to maintain client connections by supplying superb service. This will improve the top quality of your business as well as increase your repeat customers, which will certainly result in higher sales. Lastly, see to it that your shop is staffed by proficient professionals who are willing to address any kind of concerns you may have.
The most effective auto mechanics are well-mannered, mindful, as well as truly appreciate their customers. When deciding where to open your car service center, consider the area of rivals and also possible clients. Preferably, you will wish to be close to shopping locations and also within easy reach of public transport. This will guarantee that your store will certainly be hassle-free for many consumers. Check out this related post that will enlighten you more on the topic: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mechanic.
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