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sans-guy · 9 months

Note

For Bitty Advice anon:

The care and keeping of bitties is a bit more like rabbits than like hamsters or gerbils: They're social creatures, like us, and they like company. They do better when they're included in part of your family instead of relegated to a specific section of the living area. That being said, they do like having their own dedicated space for privacy to retreat to if they get overwhelmed!

It's like having a tiny roommate who's sort of also your dependent.

Personally I lean towards the larger AUs so I feel more confident handling them because the tiny ones make me so nervous when people talk about a 2 inch skeleton sharing their bed (my guy tops out at 14 inches, and a lot of 1:3 scale doll furniture/novelty seasonal decor furniture fits him just fine), but they do have a range so you want to take into account what kind of space you have for them and how much time you're willing to dedicate to carrying them around and whether or not you're the kind of person who's going to get one of those chest wraps everyone's putting their cat in on tiktok to tote a small skeleton around while you're doing chores. If you're rescuing it can be a gamble who your personality is going to click with, so you may want to start with an all-purpose beanbag/repurposed squishmallow until you know what scale you're working with.

And you can't skimp on the entertainment! Don't just give them your phone and turn them into ipad monsters! They like puzzles, and crafts, and books, and if they MUST be home alone for long periods or they're just not feeling the other options, you can even get little desktop video game arcade consoles like pac man or even a DDR machine that works just like the big version for not too much. ~20-30 bucks for hours of entertainment.

“Basic” Sansies are great for first time keepers, since they’re mostly content to cuddle and snooze and are okay with being left alone for long periods like work hours. Papyrus-types will tell you they’re also okay being left alone but they get anxious and lonely more easily and just won’t cop to it out of fear of losing your approval. Papyrus-types (LilBros and other swap variants not included) tend to be high energy and high stimulation, and can be picky eaters from what I hear. They can be a bit fussy about their surroundings and like their spaces to be clean, but they’re lovely companions if you have the time and energy to dedicate to them. I have never witnessed less-conditional love than a Papyrus-type for their caretaker, regardless of skill level or number of mistakes made. That being said, I don’t personally recommend them solo for beginners on account of the fact that they may not speak up if they’re unhappy for fear of losing your approval and begin to deteriorate without notice. If you're a beginner caretaker and absolutely MUST have a Papyrus-type, please also include a Sansy-type with him. Sansies can act as mediator and translator when it comes to anxious Papyrus-types getting what they need.

Sorry this got long! I only meant to drop a note or two and I got off on a tangent. Regardless! Good luck with the adoption and I hope you find someone that suits your current situation!

excellent, fantastic advice anon. but what bitty type do you have that is 14 inches tall

#hugh mongus #crumb is 5-ish inches #YEAH... see this guy has done way more research than me sdfsd i havent dedicated a whole lot of time to it #most of my experience is from learning how to care for crumb #i mean i always endorse rescue over 'breeders' cus there's plenty of bitties out there that need a home #bittybones #long post #i didnt really Choose crumb he was just thrusted upon me by fate and its not incredibly easy to find someone who wants them so #i bear the mantle....

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anneimaginesundertale · 2 years

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How about "Sweetie of my Dreams," aka an indulgent fic of you and Sweets? :)

Why thank you! I've been looking for an excuse to post something and this seems like a good one. I can't seem to get the words right to write the whole thing, but this seems like a good way to, um, get the news out!

Sweets and I are officially hitched!

💕💕💖💖💕💕💖💖💕💕💖💖💕💕💖💖💕💕💖💖💕💕💖💖💕

Take a look under the cut for the details, just because it got a little long! I thought about hosting an event or something, but, well, you'll see why we decided to have a small private thing instead.

We were married in summer, in August. My parents got married in August and they've been married for 38 years now, so it seems like a good luck thing. We really didn't want a big ceremony or reception. As much as we love all the other skeletons, and all of you, we knew that we'd both feel obligated to be good hosts and not just enjoy ourselves if we had a big thing. We had Grim set up cameras to film the whole thing, but the only guests we had were Sansy and my family.

We didn't go exactly traditional. Although I looked for a white dress that fit all my ideals, all of them seemed to be missing something. In the end, I went for something more colorful instead. My dress was a pastel rainbow dream, with a full skirt and lacy bell sleeves. I wore a crown of sunflowers and actually left my hair down for once. My sister curled it for me (although the curls didn't hold in the humidity). It looked good for pictures, at least.

Sweets's suit looked white until the light hit him, and then all the opalescent embroidery on it made him shine and sparkle. He stood straight and tall and I thought he was handsomer than ever.

We were married in the backyard, under an arch of enormous sunflowers. My sister stood next to me, as my matron of honor, and of course Sansy was Sweets's best man. My dad married us. He got ordained a while back and married my sister and her husband, so we asked him to marry us as well. At my request, he started our ceremony with the "Mawwidge" speech from The Princess Bride. (I've always wanted that, and it really was very funny.)

Once our laughter died down, Dad got serious. He gave us his blessing and asked us to exchange rings and share our vows.

I promised Sweets that I would love him until the end of all things, that I would take care of him and make sure he never wanted for anything. He promised that he would love me until his soul shattered, and he said that I would never go hungry. We gave each other rings to seal our promise, and our magic filled the rings to show our souls' bond.

With that, my father told Sweets he could kiss the bride and we were officially wed! We finished sealing the soul bond that night, and we'll take our official honeymoon...eventually. Maybe next month?

#drabble #anne and sweets #the best of all timelines

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echo--flowers--writes · 3 years

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How do you think the bittys would react if one day they got a little smooch on the head by the reader because they wanted to show affection for the babes? 🥺

I'll do a little scenario for each of the cuties!~

Sansy would chuckle and accept the smooch without complaint. He's chill like that. He might even lean into you touch if he's feeling especially affectionate that day. He's crack a pun or two, but that's par for the course with this guy.

Papy... Well, Papy would attempt return the favor by smooching you on the cheek. A smooch for a smooch, that's his motto! Except... He, uhh... He doesn't have any lips... It seems tiny skeleton kiss will have to do! Be prepared for a bunch of affection and hugs after. You've opened the floodgates now human!

Edgy is, uhh... Edgy. If you haven't worked passed his spiky personality and grumpy disposition then... Good luck... You might earn yourself a few sharky bites to your fingers and some not so nice words. But, if you're close, then he'll begrudgingly accept the affection with a bright blush and grumbled complains. He loves you, really. He's just a tsundare.

BOSS DOES NOT DO 'SMOOCHS'! THEY ARE BENEATH HIM! But, if you catch him on a good day you might be able to convince him. If you can convince him he'll sigh and allow you to give him a smooch with a pat to your cheek.

Good luck getting Blue to sit still long enough to give him a smooch. Once he warms up to you he's an affection ball of energy. Your best bet is to catch him when he's sleepy. When you catch him and give him his smooch, he'll grab your cheeks and nuzzle you right back with sleepy skeleton kisses.

Lil'Bro (aka Honey) will fall into your hand dramatically. You have fatally wounded him, whatever shall he dooo??? You can either play along with the cutiepie or give him more smoochs, causing further affection injuries. What will you do?

Cookie is a special case. Once he warms up to you he will happily accept your smooches with a pat on your cheek. But if he's having an off day it might be best to be careful with your smooches, be soft with the traumatized boi.

Chisp is touch starved, no matter how well he hides it. Give him a smooch an you'll have a cuddly bitty attached to you for most of the day, especially if you have food. Give out your smooches with care.

Razzy is a dignified bitty, he gives and receives affection sparingly. He'll seem indifferent to your smooches but if you know how to read him you'll see a telltale blush speckling his bones.

Pup may seem like an aloof, quiet bitty when you first meet him but this boi is an affectionate goober once he warms up to you. He'll actively seek you out for smooches and rides on your shoulder.

This was so fun to do! Thanks for the ask!

#bittybones #undertale aus #iygabac

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llamagoddessofficial · 4 years

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Ooh question! What if the boys were kitsune? How many tails would they have if the nine? Would they use their powers to keep Mc with them, or would they be more prone to pranks?

I never really thought about kitsune Sansies. Not gonna lie, when I see ‘kitsune’ my gut reaction is usually anime girls... but I did some research of my own and they’re actually far more interesting than I initially gave them credit for!

So right off the bat, all three boys are yako kitsune- trickster types who are sometimes outright maelevolent. Mischievous lil shits. None of them are tenko and you’ll soon see why.

Sans: He’s primarily grey with blue accent colours, and has 5 tails in his fox form. His forte is illusion casting and trickery- though his biggest issue is the fact that no matter how powerful his illusion magic is or how long he sustains his skeleton form, he can never change the fact that his shadow is shaped like a fox. He fell in love with a very pretty peasant Mc working on the farm with her family and, while invisible, started bringing her money (that he may or may not have stolen from other people) and granting her good luck while also playing the occasional trick. After a while of being her mysterious benefactor he starts to appear to her in fox form just to make her chase him.

Red: Grey and red, 5 tails also. He isn’t as good at illusions as Sans but he has a trick- he can expel insane amounts of flame from his mouth. Unlike Sans, who was too shy to appear for a while, Red shows straight up in her room in his fox form and then immediately after starts visiting her while she’s working in the fields in his skeleton form, flirting like a motherfucker. He prefers to give her clothes and jewellery she can wear and parade... a girl like her deserves to wear only the finest silks.

Skull: He had 7 tails... but was captured by a hunter and, in a vicious fight, lost an eye and had his one of his tails cut off as a trophy. It fractured his skeleton form permanently and thus he never enjoys using it.

He appears as a large, black kitsune with red markings. Instead of bringing fortune to her, he brings misfortune to those who wrong her... Every time she gets hurt or is upset by someone, she sees the dark kitsune somewhere. On top of a building, in a tree; always somewhere in the distance, and she can never catch it. Within a few hours of her seeing the mysterious fox, the person who wronged her is... well. They usually embarrass themselves publicly by accident, get robbed, lose an important bet... and in bad cases, they’re seriously harmed.

#llamagines #kitsune au

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sheewolf85 · 4 years

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New Fic - Common Grounds

Stretch/Reader - Reader is male Coffee Shop AU Summary: You're a college student who just needs some coffee to stay awake and study after class. Your favorite coffee shop just hired a new barista, a tall skeleton monster. At first, your interest in him begins and ends with how horribly he's treated by the general public, as if he's a performing monkey. You're not gonna let that slide, no sir. In your opinion, monsters have more than earned their right to work and live without humans gawking. The more you get to know him, however, the more you realize there's something special about him beyond his affinity for terrible puns. Notes: Super special thanks to @sansy-fresh for letting me use him as a sounding board for ideas for this fic. This would not have been written if not for you. Tags: Insecure Stretch, Barista Stretch, Instructor Blue, Monsters on the Surface, light monster discrimination (mostly toward the beginning; it’s not a central theme of the story), Sort of a slow burn

Read on AO3

Or read after the cut:

A windy chill brought a shiver to your body, and you huddled further into your jacket as you walked across the campus field toward the parking lot. Your last class had just gotten out, and now you were going to head over to the library to study for a few hours before you went home. Winter was coming fast; it seemed like it had just been summer a few weeks ago.

You got into your green Honda and started it up, turning the heater on immediately. You had to remember to bring your heavier jacket tomorrow, and probably a pair of gloves.

On the way to the library, you kept to your routine and stopped by the coffee shop you always liked to grab a drink to keep awake while you studied. Common Grounds was a terrible name for a coffee place, but it wasn’t like you could ask them to change it just because you thought it was lame. You could already smell the heavenly scent before you even reached the door.

Once inside, you rubbed your hands together to warm them up and got in line.

The place was busier than normal for a Tuesday in the late afternoon. There might usually be a person or two ahead of you, but today you were at least sixth in line and you couldn’t even see the baristas behind the counter.

The person in front of you turned and smiled at you. You smiled back.

“Are you here to see him, too?” they asked.

You raised a brow. “See who?”

They scoffed and gestured vaguely in front of them. “The new barista. He’s pretty good; gets your order right, anyway, even if he is a bit freaky.”

By the person’s description, you imagined a tall, burly man with tattoos covering his gigantic, muscular arms, one of them probably being a heart with a banner that proclaimed the wearer’s love of his mother. In your mind, said burly man was wearing a black t-shirt under a leather vest with typical fringe and was sporting a thick, heavy beard.

After a few minutes, however, it became clear that your assumption had been very, very wrong.

He was tall, that was for sure, but everything else about your vision vanished in a puff of smoke.

The new barista was a skeleton monster, not a tattoo to speak of (that you could see, anyway) wearing a bright orange t-shirt under the typical apron the baristas wore. He was smiling as he spoke to the patrons in front of them, taking their order.

In all honesty, you were really excited to see that one of your favorite places had decided to show their support of monster kind by hiring one of them.

Monsters had been freed from the underground for several years now, and for the most part, their presence in town was pretty much accepted. Your college had been among the first businesses to hire monsters, eager to provide classes on how to interact with monsters, their history, etc. It was part of the reason that you’d chosen the college you had; you were eager to learn more about your new neighbors and how best to welcome them to life in the city.

Not everyone was as keen to welcome them, however, and to this day there were people who treated monsters as though they were lesser.

You realized something then, and narrowed your eyes at the back of the head of the person in front of you. They’d said the new barista was kind of freaky. How was being a monster freaky?

It was then that you realized that several people were watching him as he made coffee, but not in a typical way they’d watch someone with a particular skill. They were watching him like he was a performing monkey.

Your teeth ground together as you huffed out an annoyed breath. The poor guy had to have just started the day before, Sunday at the very earliest, and already he was being treated like this?

Another barista came out of the back and smiled at the skeleton.

“Stretch, why didn’t you say it got busy? I could’ve come help you.”

Stretch? Interesting name.

Stretch smiled as the other took her place in front of the cash register to help the next customer.

“you were on break, amy. i can handle myself for ten minutes.”

Amy smiled amicably and continued helping her customer.

“This is not what I ordered!” the older woman who had just taken her coffee from Stretch shouted.

Stretch took the cup back and glanced at it, a very slight orange tint appearing on his cheekbones.

“uh, sorry, ma’am. didn’t you want the caramel latte with two extra shots?”

She sputtered. “Well, yes, but that’s not what that is.”

“i’m sure that’s what i put in there. hey, let’s find a common ground here, and i’ll make you a new one, yeah?” he winked at her.

“Of course you’ll make me a new one, and this time give me what I asked for.” She straightened the front of her shirt and actually stuck her chin up before she said, “and I don’t want you flirting with me again.”

You had to physically stop yourself from snorting at the idea of anyone flirting with that woman.

But poor Stretch; you felt terrible for him as his cheekbones lit up with bright orange magic. He turned away with a nod, his shoulders hunched a bit as he tossed the wrong coffee and started a new one.

By the time he made it back to the register, it was your turn to place your order. You stepped up to the counter and smiled.

“welcome to common grounds, what can i get started for you?”

“I’ll warn you in advance, I’m kind of picky. Not like that other lady, but...yeah. Can I get a large latte, half vanilla and half hazelnut, one extra shot, and like a quarter cup of ice?”

“so, you want it cold?”

You shook your head. “No, I want it a regular hot latte, but just a little bit of ice. I know how weird it sounds, trust me. I can’t drink it if it’s too hot, but then I inevitably let it sit too long and it gets too cold. But with a little bit of ice, it’s perfect.”

Stretch shrugged his shoulders. “okie dokie.” He read your order back to you and asked if you wanted anything else. When you said that was all you needed, he gave you the total and you paid, then moved over to the other end of the counter to wait for the drink.

As you usually did, you turned around and rested your back against the counter, digging your phone out of your pocket to check your emails while you waited for your drink.

Faster than you had anticipated, Stretch called out your order, and you turned around to smile at him again.

“Thank you so much!”

He paused for a second, his sockets widening in surprise. For a minute, you thought you’d somehow done something bad, but then his smile returned twice as bright as before.

“you’re welcome. have a nice day, sir.”

“Call me y/n.” You held out a hand. “Sir is my grandpa.”

Stretch chuckled and introduced himself, stripping off his plastic gloves to shake your hand. His bones were cool and hard, an interesting sensation against your skin.

Someone clearing their throat made you both look over at Amy who was helping someone at the register. The line behind them was just as long as it had been when you’d come in.

You grimaced. “Good luck,” you said. “And don’t let the haters get to ya. You’re doing great.”

He snorted. “you haven’t even tasted that yet.”

Taking the challenge, you brought the cup to your lips and took a tentative sip. It was hot, but not scorchingly so, and you let the flavors roll over your tongue. Your eyes slipped shut; many baristas had made your drink for you over the years you’d been coming here, and for the most part they had learned how to do it right. You’d never tasted it done right on a barista’s first time. Stretch was now the exception.

“Perfect,” you said, opening your eyes. Stretch’s cheekbones were glowing again. “Like I said, you’re doing great.”

You said your goodbyes and left the shop, holding the hot cup between your hands as you shivered your way to your car.

#my writing #common grounds #new fic #stretch/reader #underswap papyrus #underswap sans #male reader

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sans-floor-sock · 4 years

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{*Gives Sans a list of people to prank. They read Random, Amee, Nina, Sam, Your Dad, Papyrus, and anyone else you want to prank.) Good luck, Sansy.

* two lists...double the breaks ;]

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willowink-and-barktemplates · 4 years

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An Origin, Of Sorts

Summary

No one goes out for walk expecting to discover a whole new species of bittybones, right?

.... Right?

~~~~

“-And that’s when I said, ‘B, are you trying to decimate the multiverse through kindness again’- you’re not listening.” Renegade stared at his feline companion, who waved a paw at him.

“No no I was totally listenin-” Willow started, before being cut off.

“No they weren’t!” Aquamarine gave a lazy grin from his perch in Willow’s handkerchief.

“And good bitties wouldn’t do this to their Kind, BELOVED, partners, but we don’t all get what we want ey?” Willow gave a playful huff, before their ears swiveled around, “The fuck?”

Renegade raised a brow bone, “What do your magic ears hear, almighty feline?”

“Shut it. I heard whimpers.” They flapped a paw in Renegade’s general direction in an attempt to make him follow as they proceeded to wander in the direction they heard the cries.

“Huh, I can hear it too now. Be quiet Renegade your thoughts are too loud again.” Aquamarine commented, tilting his head to hear better as Renegade pouted, but obeyed.

Willow led Renegade over to an alleyway, and walked over to a dumpster before getting onto all fours and peering under as he kneeled down next to them.

“Helloooo? Anyone under there? I promise I’m as harmless as a particularly annoying fly.” Willow called out to the darkness under the dumpster. The afternoon shade DEFINITELY didn’t help with the lighting situation, that was for sure.

The only reply Willow received was a soft sob. The white feline frowned, before nudging Aquamarine down to the ground. “Your turn, Aqua.”

The Sansy bitty nodded at his new task, before meandering under the dumpster at a non threatening pace, sliding his hands into his hoodie pockets to help with the non threatening image.

“Heya, anyone under here? We heard some crying, so we thought we’d make sure no one’s hurt.” He squinted at the darkness, before finally giving up and summoning a small, glowing blue bone construct, and widening his eyes at what he saw.

“Oh stars….” He muttered, as he creeped forward. In front of him laid an injured centaur-like bitty. Instead of hooves, though, the bitty had feline-like paws and fur. The poor thing was shirtless, and was curled around, from what Aqua could see, an injury of sorts in its side. Its fur was stained a dark color, and was matted, along with its bones being coated in a thick layer of dirt and grime.

By the time the bitty finally noticed Aqua, he was only a few steps away, and the bitty started up a sad attempt at a growl.

Aqua raised his hands carefully, trying to show he was no threat despite the floating bone construct next to him. “Woah, now, hun. I’m not here to hurt ya. Why not get out from under here ey? It’s pretty dirty, and I have some friends who can help ya out.”

A pair of suspicious eyelights stared him down as he could feel himself being CHECKed. Definitely a Sans-type, then, from how thorough the CHECK felt.

AQUAMARINE

LV 0 EXP 0 HP 1 ATK 1 DEF 1

Only wants to help.

The bitty relaxed slightly, before speaking, “Try ta’ backstab me, and I gut ya.” It growled, before hefting itself upwards, growling when Aqua moved to help it up. “I’ GOT it.” The bitty near snarled. Aqua simply nodded, before stepping back.

When the pair finally exited the shadows of the dumpster, Willow and Renegade had to hold back gasps. The bitty was in a bad shape, and was clearly keeping it together through sheer willpower and most likely spite.

“Heya there, bud. Wanna let us take you to someone who can help out?” Willow gave a soft grin, trying to be as nice as they were capable of to the new bitty.

The bitty hesitated, before replying. “....Yes please. I’m going to pass out now.” It said, before listing sideways into Aqua’s panicked hold.

“Oh shit!” Aqua shouted, struggling a little under the others weight. Renegade was quick to snatch the two up.

“I know a place that’s open nearby here. Adoption center, should hopefully have emergency medical supplies.” Renegade informed, before snatching up Willow as well and breaking into a sprint, careful to keep his fragile cargo stable with some light usage of Gravity magic.

The receptionist was in for quite a shock when the over seven foot skeleton skidded into through the entrance.

“We need emergency medical attention stat.” Was all Renegade said as he let go of Willow (who easily landed on their feet) to get a better hold of the injured bitty.

The receptionist stuttered for a moment, before darting away to grab someone more qualified to deal with this situation. Rather quickly, a monster in nurses scrubs rushed out to take the bitty from Renegade.

----

“How is he?” Willow demanded as the monster walked out of the medical wing.

“Stable, and should recover with proper care and rest. Poor thing had a broken arm among other injuries.” She informed the trio, who had been banished to the waiting room. “Now, what happened to that poor bitty? I only see cases like that in ferals or fighting rings!” She demanded.

“We don’t know, is the thing. We found him under a dumpster in an alleyway, and he was super distrustful and would only follow Aqua after he did a CHECK.” Willow informed the monster, who sighed and ran a hand over her face.

“Might be a runaway, or a feral. What bitty type even is he? I’ve never seen one like him before. Of course, I’ve seen the odd centaur here and there, but one like this? Not a peep!””

“That we ALSO don’t know.” Renegade replied, shrugging.

“Whatever. Listen, are you able to take him home with you tonight? He’s stable enough to move, and it’s probably for the best he leaves. From my experiences, waking up in an adoption center isn’t pleasant for ferals.” The monster asked them.

Willow and Renegade looked at each other, before shrugging. Why not? Besides, they needed to get back to Pearl before they tore up the apartment. “Sure, we can handle it.” Willow decided.

“Good, let me just get him and you can take him with you.” She said, before rushing back into the medical wing to grab the currently-unconscious bitty. She soon returned with him, and Renegade took him carefully into his hands.

“Good luck.” The monster told them, before disappearing into other parts of the adoption center.

“Portal?” Renegade asked Willow, who gave him a grin.

“Portal.” They replied, already opening one up as Aquamarine squirmed from his new place in Willow’s scarf. They stepped through into their shared apartment, which was only slightly chaotic due to Opal, their resident Endogerus bitty, raining havoc. Said three foot tall bitty skidded to a halt in front of them.

“Not now, love, we have an injured with us.” Willow soothed the Endogerus, who let out a whine and head(s)butted Willow directly in their muzzle, who proceeded to splutter, as Renegade made his way to the couch, ignoring Aquamarine’s laughter. He pulled together a few of the blankets kept on the cough to make a small nest for the injured bitty, complete with pillow back support for optimal lounging.

He sat the bitty down in the middle of the middle, careful to mind the injuries. While in the medical wing, they had cleaned him up. His fur now showed cyan patterns on white fur, and snow white bones. Scars littered all exposed parts of the bitty’s body, which is to say, all of it. It made Renegade wonder what clan type the bitty belonged to.

“So.” Renegade cut through the noise, “What are we gonna do now?”

#multiverseshenanigans #ittybittybones #1shot #might end up as a multichap but if it does ill change the tags #willow the annoying cat #renegade #aquamarine #speck #this is the origin story of my bittybone's adoption center blog so check that out

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scar-sploon · 5 years

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Just came back from school, so.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY FRIEND! I wish you good luck and that you'll be happy with yourself and what you do uwu you're amazing artist and friend as it is ;3

HHHHHHHHHHH THANK YOU SANSI AAA

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skelezbian · 5 years

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yo can i get some fuckin uhhhhh stage makeup au w/swapfell sans and/or holding cell au w/swapfell papyrus??? (also props to you for writing the only swapfell sans that i actually like. that's quite an accomplishment 👍)

thank you v much! i decided to do the sf!sans w the stage makeup au bc it was just fun :^)

posted to ao3 here!

“You’re the one person who can do my elaborate stage makeup so every night you spend half an hour in close proximity to my face and I am Distressed” au

If Sans had a better sense of humor, perhaps he could laugh at how ridiculous his life had become. The Sans that had been sworn to capture all humans, knighted and sharing the position of head of the Royal Guard with Alphys, the Sans with the holding cell in a little-used shed… The violent, tyrannical, iron-fisted monster he’d once been would crush him to dust if he could see what he’d become, what he now did.

Here he was, pinching a beauty blender between his skeletal fingers, hovering over the human ambassador to the Underground, his gloves long-since abandoned on your makeup table.

He should find the situation hilarious, how far he’d fallen, how silly the situation, but instead he tilts your head from side-to-side, examining his contour. Stunning, as always. You were always a work of art, makeup or none.

“How do I look?” You bat the eyelashes that he had just painstakingly layered onto your eyelids, and he rolls his eye-lights in response. As if the answer would ever be any different.

“NOT AS GOOD AS YOU’LL LOOK ONCE I FINISH. HUSH.” Your lips curl in amusement, rolling your eyes playfully at him and scooting around on your seat. Your smile is just as sweet as that first night you’d met, stumbling out of the Ruins with a curious look on your face, delighted by the fact that it was snowing underground. Of course, the smile was soon wiped off of your face when he had stepped out from the woods to capture you, culminating in a rather sour stalemate as you refused to fight but also, skillfully dodging him, refused to be hit.

When they were Underground, Sans hadn’t given two shits about your occupation on the Surface- Papyrus was more than happy to curiously peer at you and ask for your celebrity stories, sitting and hovering around you as you sang your little human songs while you “WORKED OFF YOUR CRIME’S SENTENCE” in their home. You’d rolled your eyes then, just as you rolled your eyes now (half-amused and half-curious), and taken to the rather mediocre household chores he’d asked of you. Ultimately, he’d been surprised by your usefulness, your kindness, and that soft, tired smile you gave them once you were back inside the house after wandering around town.

And, now, here he was, holding your chin like you were a canvas that needed just one more dash of paint. It’d started as a joke too many months ago, you joking about vlogging the first human-monster makeup mess while winging your eyeliner and wagging your eyebrows at him, and Sans, never one to back down from a challenge, immediately set about proving you wrong. On the surface, he quickly learned that he was only about three Youtube videos from mastering a skill, and he spent an unreasonable amount of time watching videos of humans slapping paint onto their skin in precise strokes.

Of course, all of that had been to prove that he could easily master any human skill. Of course it hadn’t been to impress you.

He had a strange idea about color palettes and he’d had to reveal his bare hands to you after fumbling with the brush too much, but the end result had been striking and you’d been so impressed that you never went to your shows without him taking a pass at you. All the while, he’d grumble and grunt and act as if he weren’t having the time of his life, your face delicately cradled in his hands, the wide holes through his palms being brushed by your slight exhales. There was a pride to this, being so good at this task that no other human could compare, where you completely surrendered and trusted in his guidance.

“I don’t think my contour needs to be-” He quiets you by tilting your chin up- only when you’re sitting down is he tall enough to even consider a move like this. You laugh-snort, delight evident in your voice as you look at his avid concentration, “Sansy, it’s not so serious!” He’s just about to chastise you for crinkling your eyes and the powder surrounding them, hand half-raised to fix it, but you catch your hand in his.

“OF COURSE IT’S SERIOUS TO ME. IT’S FOR YOU.” It stumbles out of his mouth, supposed to be a gruff complaint, but he can’t help the tenderness that slips through. You look surprised, and he tries to deflect as hard as possible by pointing a lip gloss wand at you, “YOUR PERFORMANCE IS IN FIVE MINUTES. I NEEDED TO HAVE YOU READY TEN MINUTES AGO.” As he rounds the swell of your lips with the wand, he tries to distract himself from how soft they are, how pretty the color he’d chosen looked on you. A stunning red, chosen to match your outfit, and certainly not for his preferences.

You’re silent until he finishes, knowing what a pain the sticky lip gloss would be if it was smeared anywhere else other than your lips. When he’s done, you smack your lips together and blot, your eyes trained on him the whole time. With a mischievous look, you ask, “Kiss for good luck?” and start leaning towards the swell of his cheekbone, your lips pursed in a perfect red pout.

Sans freezes, staring at you as if you had just threatened him with bodily harm, then starts to sink down to your level as if he were a slime instead of a skeleton. When your breath brushes his cheek, your lips likely soon to follow, he suddenly realizes the situation and straightens up, “I WON’T LET YOU RUIN MY HARD WORK-” You pull back immediately, your mischief dissolved, your expression almost professional.

“Oh, uh, right. My bad, Sans- I got kinda caught up, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Guess I should be on my way, huh? Crowd’s waiting for me.” Instead of a kiss, you pat his cheek fondly, friendly.

This time, he’s the one to stop you, catching your wrist. “BUT. IF THE OFFER STILL STANDS, I WOULD-” He fumbles for a word that isn’t ‘love’. “-GREATLY ENJOY CASHING IN AFTER THE SHOW.”

#sans x reader #undertale imagines #reader insert #undertale #swapfell sans #my writing #Anonymous

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keelywolfe · 5 years

Text

Drabble: Not a Monkey's Uncle (baon)

Summary: Red is not a babysitter. That is definitely for the best.

Tags: Spicyhoney, Established Relationship, Brotherly Affection (sort of), Hints of kustard

Notes: @frankpanioncube suggested that Red might be an...uh...interesting babysitter. My brain went this way with it. ^_^

Part of the ‘by any other name’ series.

Read it on AO3

Read it Here!

~~*~~

Red didn’t get what the big deal was about the sun, anyway. Some mornings the fucking thing was like getting stabbed in the socket with a lit cigarette, days with a hangover lingering in his skull like an unwanted guest.

Not that he was usually walking anywhere, not on this kind of morning, but he hadn’t been over lately to check the status of the leftovers in his bro’s fridge. His head ached but hunger was gnawing at his magic. These days, Red didn’t stay hungry if he could help it and if helping it involved a jaunt over to the bro’s, welp, that was what he’d do. Odds were about fifty-fifty that Edge was still pissy at him, but eh, pressing his luck had gotten Red this far in life and chili dogs were in season. May as well take the chance and if Edge still had a bug up his ass then at least Red could die full. He stepped out from the shortcut onto the sidewalk in front of their house, sunglasses firmly in place, and hung out a minute to finish his cigar. Pressing his luck was one thing but smoking in the house was bordering on suicidal. Red wasn’t in that much of a mood, thanks. “Hello Mister Sans Red Sir!” Red froze, cigar clenched in his teeth. What the fuck…? He tipped down his sunglasses to get a better look. Scattered over the front yard between all those weed piles his brother grew were a bunch of filthy Monster kids. All looking at him with bright, cheery interest or maybe like they were about to rip out his soul and feast on it, could go either way. His bro really needed to rethink his lawn ornaments; these ones were a little too eager. Red didn’t know a lot about rug monkeys. His experience began and ended with Edge, and he wouldn’t call his bro’s childhood or even his bro a great representation of normalcy. “hey,” he said, cautiously. Not that he wanted a chat with the booger-flinging crowd, but it paid well to make good with the neighbors. A chorus of 'hi's, 'hello's, and hand waves came at him like an attack, loud enough for his lingering hangover to perk up in the back of his skull to do the cha-cha-cha. Yeah, okay, that was enough of that. Red crushed out his cigar beneath one sneaker and made to walk past them. Shame it turned out that talking to ‘em was an invite he damn well hadn’t meant to send. The whole pack of ‘em tromped over in his direction and before he could so much as say fuck off, he was surrounded. Well, fuck him sideways and upside down, this was a conundrum, wasn’t it. He’d been top of the food chain in Underfell and here he was in the soft world getting trapped like a lame zebra by a group of junior lions. Sans was gonna laugh his ass off when he found out—and he would. The only question was how long he’d ride the insult train on it before Red shut his choo-chooing up. Not that Red couldn’t just shortcut his way out but eh, now it was too late. Now they’d caught his interest, which just went to show that kids made poor life choices. “what’s up, kiddos,” Red asked, easily. Most of ‘em were about his height or taller, but Red hadn’t worn that expression of eager innocence since about the first time he’d put feet on the ground. “where’s stretch and the boss?” “Mister Papyrus Stretch Sir isn’t here today,” the spokes-kid said mournfully. Red filed that useful tidbit away. “We’re helping with the garden and Mister Edge Sir went to get us lunch. But he’s taking a long time!” A murmur of agreement went through the peanut gallery and for fuck’s sake, Red hadn’t seen begging eyes like that since the last time Sansy had let him use the cuffs. He cut that thought off quick; even thinking about that night around a bunch kids was probably at least a misdemeanor. Red sucked his teeth thoughtfully. “hungry, huh? that a fact?” Red considered the contents of his inventory and grinned, a smile that usually sent a cold chill down a stiffest spine, but the ankle biters only nodded like a troop of fucking bobble heads. “then lemme see what uncle red can do for ya.”

~~*~~

It was about fifteen minutes later as the crow flies when Edge finally made his grand entrance. The tray he was carrying had a pretty damn impressive spread. No surprise there, his bro had a thing about his nosh. But the princess was a little too late for the ball this time, and instead of a fanfare, he got groans and sickly whimpers. He stopped at the top of the stairs and stared down at the massacre across his lawn, stunned to silence. Even Red would admit it was impressive; a collection of brats collapsed on the grass in various states of whimpering. Couple of ‘em even looked a little green and Red idly wondered how his bro was gonna handle that. Better to puke on the grass or risk contaminating the floor on the way to the john, now that was a real decision. Probably would have been better to ditch before Edge came out, but if Red’d done that, he wouldn’t get to see his brother’s fine temper, now would he? Plus, he hadn’t made it to the fridge yet, eyes on the prize and all that shit. Still took some stones not to flinch when his brother swung that temper his way. S’ok, Red had a stone or two to spare and seeing Edge’s eye lights burning like the fires of hell was like a walk down memory lane. “What did you do?” Edge demanded, no, snarled at him. Okay, yeah, maybe time to cool it a notch. Red only shrugged. “they said they was starving. never liked to see a hungry kid so i helped ‘em out.” Scattered between the kids were a litter of empty frosting containers, mostly chocolate but there was a coupla buttercream and one coconut thrown into the mix. One of the little crotch fruit still had a chocolate-smeared hand stuck in one of ‘em, but most were licked clean. That had been impressive on its own; lil’ fuckers were like locusts, devouring all in their path. Edge set the tray down and scrubbed at his face with one hand, the redness of his eye lights leaking through his fingers. He wasn’t exactly calmer when he looked back at Red, but murder was at least off the table. For now, anyway. “You—” Well, hey, there was one to mark off his bucket list. Never in his life had Edge been unable to find words for him; usually he kept a nice collection of ‘fucks’ polished up just for him. Edge seemed to be holding those in reserve because all he managed to say between gritted teeth was, “Why did you even have that much frosting?” “i’d tell ya, boss, but you’d probably regret knowing.” As it was, he was gonna have to make a grocery run or Sans would be hopping right back into the line of people hacked off at him. Probably Sans should get frequent flyer miles by now and Edge never left, just tore off another number and waited his turn. “All right,” Edge said heavily. “All right.” He raised his voice to include the brats, “Let’s get cleaned up and each of you can try to get a sandwich in you before you go home.” A chorus of groans went through his fallen troops, and then a collective, “Yes, Boss.” Wellie, well, well, from the returning blaze of his eye lights, it looked like his bro was gonna dig out his special collection of fucks after all, the kind ya brought out for company. Hope the kids didn’t take any of ‘em home for the folks. Probably time for him to make like a tree and run like hell, but Red snagged a coupla sandwiches from the tray before stepping into a shortcut. That couldn’t have done much in the way of getting Edge over being pissed at him, but eh, he was more fun when he was riled up, anyway. He could be soft for the honey bun, if he wanted. For Red, his little brother better stay on his toes or they might get stepped on. And Red wasn’t afraid to break a bone or two if that’s what it took. What else were brothers for?

-finis-

#spicyhoney #papcest #keelywolfe #underfell #underswap #underfell papyrus #underswap papyrus #by any other name

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nyangibun · 5 years

Note

Jonsa prompt - drunk Mario Kart drinking game. Pretty please

“If you hit me with that damn shell one more time, Jon Snow!”

His laughter bursts out of him like he hadn’t expected it and Sansa has to stamp down on her own smile. In her peripheral, she can see him shaking his head. “How are you going to get me back when I’m so far head of you, Sans?”

She kicks at his shin. “I’m just not used to playing anymore!”

“Do you know what I hear?” he says, casual, as his avatar crosses the finish line, “all I hear are excuses from a sore loser.”

She kicks him harder this time and Jon yelps. “I am not. I’m just –” She scrambles for a real excuse and settles on, “out of practice. Unlike you and Robb, I actually have a life, okay?”

Jon puts the controller down on the coffee table and turns to look at her. The smile on his lips makes her want to kick for the third time. “Sounds like a sore loser to me.”

Sansa isn’t naturally a competitive person. She doesn’t have the same drive for it like her siblings do. She has always been someone who prefers spending her time productively and she never saw sports or games as particularly that productive. But over the years, Sansa’s come to realise that the more she drinks, the more competitive she becomes, and with two glasses of wine in her, she is ready to fight Jon if she has to.

“Or maybe we should make this interesting,” Sansa says, a smirk pulling at her lips. In the back of her mind, there is a small, sober Sansa yelling at her that what she’s about to say is a very bad idea, but there are also several hundred dancing drunk Sansa’s to tell her to shut up.

Jon leans forward, intrigued. “What do you have in mind?”

The tiny Sansa screams louder but Sansa just shrugs. “A game.”

“We’re already playing a game,” Jon says with a laugh. He flicks her nose. “Or have you forgotten, Sansy pants?”

She scrunches up her nose with disgust. She hates that nickname and he knows it. “No, a game on top of a game!” He looks dubious so she continues on. “It’s like truth or dare but – okay, so any time one of us gets hit by the the other with a shell or loses a race, we have to choose: truth or strip.”

Jon blinks, inhales deeply and moves further back in the sofa. “That’s not a good idea.”

Sansa shoves him. “Why not? We’re two grown adults. It’s not like I’ve never seen you shirtless before! C’mon. It’s just for fun!”

He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. “What happened to Princess Sansa who wouldn’t even join us in the lake because she didn’t want to get her hair wet?”

“Uh, I had just gone to the salon, of course I wasn’t gonna get it wet.” Anyone would think that was obvious. “So are you in or not? Or are you afraid I’m gonna kick your a –”

“Alright but don’t say I didn’t warn you that this was a bad idea,” Jon says with another deep exhale. Someone would think she has a gun to his head but at least he’s playing with her and that’s what she wants, so she ignores his reluctance, not really in the right mindset to wonder why he is or why he has a very, very valid point.

“Get ready to lose, Jon Snow!”

Two games in and Sansa’s already told Jon about the time she broke her mum’s expensive vase and let Theon take the fall for it and how Margaery is technically her first kiss because they practised before Joffrey took her out on their first date. And the fact that Margaery and her actually dated for a few months when they both moved to London for uni but that ultimately, they each preferred being friends more. By the third game, Sansa is done telling truths and she’s too drunk to be self-conscious, so when Jon, of course, hits her avatar with a green shell, she tugs at the hem of her shirt and flings it across the room.

“Fuck, Sansa!” Jon shouts. “Warn a guy before you do that!”

She giggles and scoots closer. “What? Do bras make you uncomfortable? Is it because you don’t know how to work them?” He rolls his eyes at her reference but there is still a very visible flush on his cheeks. Sansa pokes him. “If I make you so uncomfortable then maybe you should stop hitting me with shells!” Although her words are teasing, there’s a lilt of hurt. She knows Jon only really sees her as a little sister but doesn’t he find her the least bit attractive? Is that why he was so reluctant to play with her?

He opens his mouth to say something but Sansa’s drunk and sober selves are feeling a little sad now and she doesn’t want to focus on it so she puts on a bright smile. “C’mon, unpause! I’m for sure going to kick your ass now.”

Jon sighs but does as she asks. She puts all of her effort on the game, silence descending upon them, which is bizarre considering it had been nonstop chatter since Sansa came to crash at Jon’s flat when a pipe burst at her own.

By some stroke of luck, Sansa does win. The first out of at least ten games and she jumps up and throws her controller down onto the sofa. “I did it! Oh my god, I did it!”

Jon is laughing at her and she points at him with a devilish glee. “Truth or strip, Snow. Choose wisely!”

“I choose truth.”

“Ah, spoil sport,” she groans, dropping back down on the sofa.

“The truth is you don’t make me uncomfortable,” Jon says. “Not in the way you’re thinking.” He’s closer now and Sansa has to turn to look at him. “It’s just – fuck, I don’t know how you haven’t figured this out already but I think you’re probably the hottest girl I know and it’s really annoying, okay?”

This dumbfounds her. She doesn’t know what to say to that so she doesn’t say anything at all. She just grabs her controller and smiles. “Next round?”

But now, it’s too hard to focus. Jon thinks she’s hot? How? When? Why? It’s too much for the drunk Sansas to grasp and sober Sansa is nowhere to be found. She wants to figure it out, to understand why this is so monumental to her or why she can’t stop glancing at him. It’s all she can focus on, so when Sansa finally hits him with her shell, she doesn’t notice, until he laughs and goes, “I guess I’ll strip this time.”

Before she can even comprehend what he had just said, Jon is already taking off his shirt and something just clicks. She doesn’t fully grasp what her body has already realised but she goes with it, throwing her arms around his neck and pressing her lips sloppily against his. Jon freezes beneath her and she feels his hands on her arms, pushing her back. She’s positive she’s just been rejected.

“I’m… You started it!” she shouts instead of apologising. “Telling me I’m the hottest girl you’ve ever seen. How was I supposed to handle that? And then you take off your shirt! It’s - it’s a lot, okay?”

Jon laughs and circles his hand around her wrist to tug her back towards him. “Yeah, this is all my fault,” he murmurs, peppering kisses to her nose, cheeks and then a brief one to her lips. “Not you who decided we need to play truth or strip.”

Sansa giggles when he leans in for another kiss, deepening it further. “I still stand by my idea being amazing.”

Jon laughs against her lips. “You’re right. Your idea is amazing.”

They’re too drunk to do anything other than make out but Sansa does end up in Jon’s bed, cuddled up against him, instead of the guest bedroom, and when they wake up the next day, feeling the after-effects of excessive drinking the night before, they of course decide that having sex was the only true cure for it.

It doesn’t work but they don’t care either.

#jonsa #actuallyjonsa #jonsaff #my fics #asks #anonymous #kjahdksjhfdsk idk

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graceful-defender-of-paris · 5 years

Note

Theonsa high school sweethearts

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20115370

Sorry for the late reply!

(2347)

If you had asked Sansa a month ago or even five minutes ago what she thought about Theon she would have said he was like a piece of furniture, he was always around the Stark household.

He had always been Theon her brothers best friend. Theon who was her brother in all but name if Robb had his way, he was an honorary member of the Starks.

So why was it that after being dragged along by the rest of the family to Theon's swimming gala. So she of course was disgruntled because she had planned to visit Margaery to watch ‘Love Islands’. each year they took attractive singles from all over Westeros and put them on an island, the year before they were in the Arbor but this year they were on Dragonstone, it was so exciting! Especially since Margaery's brother Garlan was on so it was basically her civic duty to watch it and support her friend's brother.

But, instead, she was watching Theon. In his swim shorts, that showed off his surprisingly toned body with a chiselled abdomen that the droplets of water cascaded so attractively down, as he pulled himself out of the water, her eyes were drawn to his muscled biceps that glowed as though sun-kissed in the fluorescent lighting of the Winterfell leisure centres swimming pool.

Oh, gods, she might have a crush on Theon.

This was TERRIBLE! No no no this cannot happen , she absolutely cannot like Theon because he is much older (a year above her) , he is a notorious womaniser and worst of all he definitely sees her as his little sister.

So, all in all, she was definitely screwed.

There was no way she could ever look Theon in the eye again, let alone be in a room with him so obviously, her best option now was to run away and join the silent sisters.

Yeah, that could work.

They were going to arrive home late-probably after midnight so she would have to watch Love Island on catch up at home. After Winterfell academy swim team won they were all invited for a celebratory meal where Sansa found herself increasingly panicked at the realisation that Theon was not just hot but extremely hot.

So she did what any normal person would do. She panic texted her best friend Margaery.

[Sansie]

Okay so

Has Theon suddenly become hot or have I been blind my entire life?

[Margie]

You’re only just realising??

If I wasn't having my world rocked by your stupidly hot brother I'd jump on that

Also, have you realised that you are in love with him yet?

[Sansie]

please don't use 'world rocked' and 'hot brother' in the same sentence ever again

AND I AM NOT

[Margie]

Sure San…

[Sansie]

I mean it!

It's just that

Did I blackout for ten years or something cause I swear he was Robb's annoying best friend yesterday but now he's all attractive and annoying and oh god's I like him don't I?

[Margaery]

Yep

Now go get him before anyone else does

Since there were so many of them the family had been split into their mum's people carrier and Robb's small Toyota Prius, unfortunately for her, she was in Robbs car, which also seated Theon. She was in the back in the middle seat squashed between Arya and Theon and wondering if her life could get any worse.

She was terrified to even check her phone in the case any more of Margaery's messages came through and he would see it- which had happened with Rickon earlier.

He kept making kissing noises at her and Theon and now she found herself here.

It was nearly impossible to ignore him now. All her senses were heightened when he was around and now all she wanted was a scented candle of him, How he managed to smell like the sea and Winterfell would forever elude her but gods it was intoxicating.

Arya had been giving her odd stares as though she had been acting weird- which given the situation was understandable but it was when Theon whispered close to her ear “are you okay Sans? You're not acting like yourself” that she really fell apart.

Turns out all it took was watching Theon get out of a swimming pool for her to question everything in her life and then some.

She squeaked out an affirmation that was supposed to mean “I am fine” but sounded more like a smothered cry for help. Which Theon took to mean “I'm cold” as he took off his jacket, put it around her and put his arm over her shoulder and snuggled her closer to him.

And to make it worse, she fell asleep.

“Sans”

Her pillow seemed to be wriggling so she held on to it tighter to keep it still

“Sans, c’mon you have to let me go now”

Why was her pillow trying to talk to her?

“hrmph”

She could hear a little some bickering that sounded like one of her brothers but she just wanted to go back to dreaming of a world where Theon didn't just see her as his little sister.

Ahh Theon

Unbeknownst to her, of course, was that she had just said this out loud in front of said object of desire

“Uhhh… okay” her pillow seemed confused, “Sansa, Robbs about to drop me off at home, I'm just going to remove your arms from me so I can get out..”

Wait, what? Was she lying on Theon? Suddenly a rush of adrenaline shook her awake and she was keenly aware of how she was lying on top of Theon

She blearily tried to blink the sleep out of her eyes when she saw Theon's sea-green eyes staring intently at her, his mouth broke into a relieved smile and she fell deeper.

“You can keep my jacket, I know its cold, it's about a minute or two till Robb drops me off and I didn't want to have to wake you while everyone was watching” his eyes darted to Robb and Jon who were happily oblivious to the affairs of the back seat, and Arya who was texting away on her phone.

[Sansie]

Oh god it's so much worse I've gone completely 0-60 and now I can never show my face again

I slept on theon in the car

[margaery]

That's it?

No outburst of I love you?

boring

though if you were going to do a random declaration of love I would've liked to be there so I could do it justice in my maid of honour speech

[Sansie]

Let me live! ive only realised I liked him four hours

[Margie]

And he's liked you for at least the past four years

Honestly, I'll be dead before either of you make a move

I heard Jeyne has a thing for him, so really confess your undying love soon before we have to go on a ben & jerry's rom-com binge to mend your broken heart

[Sansie]

JEYNE?!?!

I'm so screwed :(

[margie]

You're using emojis

It's worse than I imagined

******

Its been three months since her startling realisation that she had a crush on theon and so far she had done absolutely nothing about it- not for Margaery's lack of trying.

“You know he likes you back” Margaery all but declared in the middle of the hallway on their way to geography- the one class she hated (she was failing at geography). What made that matter worse was that her teacher, Mr Luwin, had organised for Theon to tutor her for her upcoming exams.

Apparently, her teacher was out to get her as well.

“He doesn't! And I don't want to make things awkward for him and Robb. I also don't want to fail geography”

“c’mon! You cant say that you haven't loved every minute of your late-night study sessions” Margaery teases, Sansa could feel the blood rushing to her cheeks at the thought of Theon in his oversized hoodie and messy hair sitting at the desk in her bedroom.

“That's irrelevant.”

Margaery shot her an incredulous look and opened the door to their class, “you never know until you try and I have it on good authority that he would be very open to you advances” and gave Sansa a knowing wink before sitting at her desk.

Ugh, there was really no escaping it anymore was where Margaery would rest until she finally jumped the bones. And at the rate she was going she thought that theon probably would just be bones before she finally had the guts to tell him.

Thought of theon consumed her throughout geography and she found herself at a complete loss when she was called upon to answer in class.

“Miss Stark?, I asked you a question.”

She felt her heartbeat race as she stuttered out “um, could you repeat the question please?”

“How many islands make up the archipelago of the iron islands?” Mr Luwin repeated

She knew this one, Theon would always talk about his homeland and the way his eyes crinkled when gushing about the bracing wing and the waves crashed against the rocks had embedded itself in her mind “31 Sir”

“That's right Miss Stark” She let out a breath of relief, perhaps she might survive this after all.

****

She had taken Margaery’s advice to heart, so she had decided that tonight would be perfect. He was coming over for their study session and her parents and younger brothers would be away for Rickon’s Skagosi fighting tournament, Jon would be at his “nights watch” band practice and Margaery had promised her that she would keep Robb occupied.

She didn't want to know how , all Sansa knew was that she needed to do something now- or forever hold her peace.

Maybe that's a bit too much , she thought. No need to scare him senseless like “oh hello theon thank you for helping me study, by the way, let's get married”

‘Bzz’

her phone vibrated alerting her of incoming texts. She had been in the middle of getting ready- but not too ready for Theon's arrival and she rushed over to check her messages.

One was a snap from Margaery with her fingers crossed with “GOOD LUCK!” and “GET IT GIRL” splashed across it, the other was a message from theon.

[Theo]

Swim practice finished early so I’ll be there in ten

I'll lift some coffee on the way, your usual?

Oh no.

She was supposed to have at least another hour to prepare herself. She was supposed to be calm and collected not frazzled and panicked.

[Sans]

Sure :)

Crap she must sound like a prat.

She began pacing the house- her room couldn't contain her anxious energy and was midway through her second tour of the living room when Arya ambled in and said “could you please stop pacing! Just tell theon that you like him and be done with it” she had forgotten that Arya was home.

Spluttering she could barely form the words to try and denounce her claims when the doorbell rang.

Her eyes locked with Arya’s and it was a race to open the front door. Arya was using her training to vault over the sofa but Sansa’s determination drove her to push herself faster until she almost slid past the door entirely,

Her hair was a mess, Arya had just clung onto her jacket- which coincidentally was a leftover from theon when she had slept on him so long ago and opened the door. To a quite perplexed theon.

Her mothers teaching kicked in after the awkward pause since opening the door, she shook off Arya's grip and welcomed theon “Come on in!” in her best imitation of her mother's hostess voice.

Arya had other ideas, “Sansa likes you, you like Sansa. Can you two go off now and stop moping?” and pushed Sansa into Theon's arms before trudging up the stairs to her room to presumably notify the family group chat of this occurrence.

She thought Margaerys matchmaking was bad but now she was screwed.

No way to come back from this.

There was little that Sansa could really do about her predicament, Theon had dropped their coffees to catch her, “uh, hey sans” theon appeared confused as she looked up at him and then a mischevious glint appeared in his eyes and he teased “so you falling for me?”

She felt embarrassment take over as her worst fears were realised.

Pulling herself up with as much dignity is possible she turned to theon to say “There's no need to make fun of me if you don't like me that's fine and I can study just fine on my own” and made to close the front door on him.

Mother would baulk at her for such rude behaviour.

Before the door could close theon had stuck his foot in the gap preventing her from pushing him out, “Sansa,” her heart sunk further theon never used her full name. “Do you want to maybe get coffee?”

She nods tentatively in response.

Theon smiled in relief and he offered her his arm- if Margaery was here she would say his arm.

The remnants of their spilt coffee lay at their feet but maybe this was her chance, maybe he does like her.

As he opened the car door for her he bashfully asked “Was, was what Arya said true? Because, uh… if it was I would say that feel the same way about you.” she leant against his car stumped at his revelation. Sansa struggled to find the words to say to him and her eyes became drawn to his lips before dragging them back to the ocean pools that were his eyes.

So, instead, she pulled him in closer to her and placed a quick, barely-a-kiss on his lips.

He murmured “Do you have a map? Cause I got lost in your eyes”

Idiot she thought but still found herself giggling at it.

He held her closer to deepen their kiss and she could feel his smile that threatened to break out.

#sansa stark #theon greyjoy #theon x sansa #theonsa #my writing

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