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sockablock · 3 years

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hey are requests still open bc I am still FULLY CRYING about Molly coming back to life holy SHIT. I have a thing I want to request and that’s Molly having to come to terms with whatever changes his body went through - new blood hunter abilities, longer hair, the much larger scar from Lucien’s v gory death - after he comes back to life.

Molly doesn’t ask what happened to Nott. He doesn’t ask them where they are. He doesn’t even ask who Essek is, and only gives Caduceus a friendly pat on the shoulder before turning away and wandering off.

His feet are bare on the soft teal grass. This time of year in the Blooming Grove, faint glowing insects hover around his ankles. The leaves of the old blue wisteria trees hang like a sheet across the sky. He is wrapped in a cloak of quiet moonlight, grey on the graves as he passes by.

Eventually, he comes to a lone headstone. It is long, and flat, and smooth. He sits down.

If he is different in any way, nobody says. It’s taken him a few days to find his words again, and it’s clear that his memories are still trickling back. Veth had joked that he used to be more entertaining, but they all know that his returning in any capacity is already nothing short of a miracle. To the Mighty Nein, he is still as miraculous as before.

To himself—to Mollymauk, he thinks he’s a bit leaner. He’d never really been one for rigorous training—not aside from what it took to throw a sword and catch it—and yet, this body seems hardened, now. It’s still a bit sore in some inconvenient places, and the tall one, Caduceus, mentioned that he shouldn’t do anything too strenuous to avoid opening his scar. This newest mark runs like a seam down his shoulder to his navel, making the rest of his scars look like paper cuts. He isn’t exactly sure how to feel about that, yet. Beau offered to help him design a tattoo to cover it, and he isn’t sure how to feel about that yet, either.

A faint breeze runs through the Grove, tousling his hair. It’s longer now, and Molly might have liked that more if he’d been around to enjoy it. He suspects that he might have been, in one way or another, though not nearly present enough to make the executive choices. Otherwise, he might have tried braids. Maybe hair dye. Not only that, but the...what had Caleb called him? The “previous occupant” had taken off Molly’s horn charms and necklaces. For the second-life of him, Molly can’t remember if he’d kept them. He can’t remember much about the last ten months—which might be alright. He doesn’t know if he wants to.

(He does remember some things, though. He remembers taking his shirt off the first night at the Grove and seeing the other scar left behind. It is closed now, and healed well over with blood magic, but when Molly reaches up and traces it down, he can feel how the cut drips into his abdomen. He remembers how it felt to have the blood pouring over, to boil with fury and die of shock, under the stars.)

He looks at them now. They haven’t changed a bit.

Another wind kicks up. Molly isn’t sure exactly what time of year it is, but he shivers. The Clays are kind, but the whole family towers over Molly, so their spare clothes fit him poorly. Firbolgs are also—well, furred—and Molly suspects that this borrowed tunic is on the thin side. His tail curls inward as he realizes he’s going to sneeze. He feels his muscles tense, he breathes in—

And suddenly, something warm is draped across his shoulders. He glances up.

“Oh. Yasha?“ His voice is strained. It feels as if Molly hasn’t spoken in a year, but at the same time, he feels like his throat is worn. Almost like he’s been giving frequent speeches with wild abandon. Now that he’s had some time to recover, the combined effect sounds like someone trying to remember how to talk, but only being allowed to do it through a rusty pipe.

“Come to join me in my musings?” he still says, stubbornly.

“She’s not the only one. ‘Sup.”

Molly doesn’t have to turn to know that Beauregard has walked into the rows of graves just behind Yasha. The two of them have been pretty attached to each other lately, except for when Yasha comes to check on Molly. The strongest part of him, the part that hung on the longest, is privately quite pleased by this.

“And you’ve given me your cloak.” He grins, but just at Yasha. “How kind of you, my dear.”

Okay, so not that privately.

“I was worried you’d be cold,” Yasha says, concern endearing. “Sorry your old coat wasn’t doing better. Jester says she can probably Mend it, or try to paint you a new one—“

Molly waves his hand. “No, no need, dear. I should do it. It’ll give me a thing to work on.”

Yasha nods. “I’ll let her know.”

Distantly, Molly can hear footsteps approaching. He counts four, maybe five pairs, if one of them is lighter. After a moment, there’s the sigh of cloth, and six pairs are walking.

Movement joins Molly on the headstone. He turns, and now Beau is seated beside him. Yasha stands like a guardian at his back.

Both of them are much, much wearier, Molly notices. Even though it’s been less than a year since his “death,” Beau is riddled with new scars from combat, and Yasha’s tattoos have gotten much bolder. Oddly, that’s reassuring.There’s something in the fact that Molly’s body changed, but theirs did too. And even if he can’t remember it, that’s something they have in common.

On the other hand, though, it makes him feel...he shakes his head. He gazes outward.

He asks, “Why did you follow me, then?”

Beau responds first. She does so with a snort. “Of course we’d follow you, you idiot. You were our friend—or...okay, technically, at the time you’re actually a crazy cult leader—“

“No, I meant—“

She cuts him off. “Right, yeah, details. Not important. Listen, it...it was a whole long thing, and it was complicated, but the important part is that we really, just really wanted you back. That’s why we did any of it. All of it. And why nothing could stop us.”

“Not even me?”

“Hell, no. Since when could you stop me?”

Molly chuckles at that. He glances at Yasha. “Is that true?”

“Which part?” she says. Then she says, “Yes. It is.”

He matches the tiny smile on her face. Then he turns back to stare at the woods past the graveyard while behind him, the rest of the Mighty Nein come to a halt.

His smile widens. “What I was actually trying to ask, though, is why you all followed me here. Just now. I thought you were going to prepare for dinner?”

“My parents took over,” Caduceus says. “They told us to take a break.”

“Besides!” With a burst of jewelry and her flouncing skirts, Jester squeezes onto the other end of Molly’s headstone. “We wanted to spend more with you!”

“Now that you’re interesting again,” adds Nott, taking a seat at the base of the stone with Fjord. He reaches up to wink at Molly, “Hey, roomie.”

“I thought I should get to know you as well,” says the new voice. Molly remembers that his name is Essek. “We, ah...we are both purple, so that is something we already have in common.”

Molly laughs at that. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Caleb. “It’s like there are two of you now. Like your shadow. Or a duplicate.”

“I am still the funny one,” Caleb says. “I plan on defending that title. Even from you.”

Molly laughs again, and this time, he does turn. He can see that the whole group have gathered around him now, sitting beside him, standing behind him, in the grass.

They are all so tired. They are all much stronger. Molly has gathered from the scars on their bodies—as well as from the scars on his own—just how powerful they must be now. He knows that he isn’t the same, either. Sometimes his blood feels like its boiling. Sometimes he is moving, and he can swear that it’s through snow.

But the Mighty Nein are here. There are nine of them, now. And that, he thinks, in and of itself, must be a miracle. And as he looks at them now, drinking their presence in, he thinks...

Maybe some things haven’t changed, after all.

—

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princessamericachavez · 3 years

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Fjorester Talk in episode 117

also known as Sofía goes buckwild and overanalyzes 10 minutes of conversation and body language.

ready?

Ok, first of all, Fjord looks so worried from the get go as he asks Jester if Lucien/Cree was speaking to her directly.

And when she confirms it he does this little grumpy sigh

He no like it. No like it at all.

Fjord: Does it seem like he’s keying in on you in particular?

LISTEN GUYS

I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR LIKE TWO WEEKS

HOPING FJORD WOULD GET PROTECTIVE OVER JESTER CONSTANTLY GETTING SCRIED ON/MESSAGED BY LUCIEN BUT I DIDN’T THINK TRAVIS WAS ACTUALLY GOING TO DELIVER

AND HE DIIIIIID

Ok anyway he goes on about how when they see someone else scrying it’s usually just a representation of the spell and wonders if Lucien is more powerful and therefor can see the person

and then he makes a pause mid-argument

because Jester makes this face and he realizes this is upsetting her, so he quickly backtracks trying to reassure her.

Fjord: I’m sure it’s just coincidence but...

and here’s where the idea comes and god how long has he been thinking about this???

Fjord: since we’re not in the sea... would you... want to wear this?

YES HELLO DO YOU SEE THE PARALLELS TO THAT ONE TIME HE WANTED TO GIVE HER AN EXTRA POWERFUL HEALING POTION TO MAKE SURE SHE WOULD BE SAFE??? PROTECTIVE FJORD PARALLELS!!!

and then he just brushes off the fact that he’s a huge Uk’otoa beacon everytime they are on water —baby, you died once already, don’t act like it’s whatever???

Fjord: maybe it would provide some protection if we were to keep checking in on him?

Jester: I mean... it’s worth a try.

Of course, as she points out, Lucien has already met all of them and he could just as easily scry on any of the M9 if he wanted to, but that’s not really what Fjord is worried about, what is bothering him. Fjord knew Lucien was watching and it’s not the first time they are scried on, but he makes it clear that he’s concerned about how centered on Jester that’s been lately.

Jester: Maybe it’ll keep me from getting seen next time I scry on him?

Fjord: I guess we’ll find out next time we try it.

The way he chuckles softly, trying to defuse the tension, and she smiles back even though this subject clearly has her nervous??? 11/10

Jester: Thank you.

SHE SAYS IT SO SOFTLY. SHE’S CLEARY SO TOUCHED THAT HE’S WATCHING OUT FOR HER AND HAVING HER BACK JUST LIKE HE ALWAYS DOES.

LOOK AT THOSE HEART EYES THEY BOTH HAVE WTF

THEY ARE BOTH SO SOFT

Fjord: Yeah. Just in case it’s not... coincidence.

Listen there’s such a heaviness in how he says the word.

Like the possibility of anyone —especially this very dangerous stranger with the face of a friend— purposefully targeting Jester is his worst nightmare. It probably is.

Jester: It’s also creepy. He did say that he kind of knew me, right?

NOTICE HOW JESTER IS STILL PLAYING WITH THE AMULET IN HER HANDS???

Idk why but that’s getting to me. She’s so nervous with this whole thing.

Fjord: He did?

Jester: When we got there he said he hadn’t met anyone except for me.

OH FJORD DOESN’T LIKE THIS AT ALL

So of course Jester tries to defuse the tension talking about how she must look like through the scry

AND HE’S JUST SO IN LOVE

And so he plays along

LOOK AT THE WAY HE MAKE HER SMILE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(same, Ashley, same)

And so, more reassured by the goofiness, Jester finally puts the necklace on.

Fjord: And of course, it’s Caleb’s...

Jester: oh

LISTEN SHE DID NOT LIKE THAT. She was clearly so excited to get a present like this from Fjord and you can see her face fall a little when it’s deviated towards someone else.

Jester: should I ask him if it’s okay?

Fjord: Well, he gave it to me to use it..

Fjord: and you seem to need it more.

AKA THE AMULET WAS FOR FJORD’S WELLBEING BUT THE WAY HE IS OK IS IF HE KNOWS JESTER IS PROTECTED

Jester, now that she knows this is something that he is personally choosing to transfer to her: Okay...

LOOK AT THE WAY SHE CLUTCHES IT TO HER HEART I’M DYING

Fjord: And just be careful.

Fjord: I don’t like the possibility of him keying in on you or using that connection between the two of you to manipulate something. His magic seems strange.

LISTEN GUYS LISTEN

THIS PART HERE IS HUGE OK?

This is the part where Fjord took 18 steps forward instead of one since Rumblecusp

Whereas before he could’ve hide his concern as something tactical, something useful that made sense and could help their mission... or could’ve hidden behind group speech to disguise his concern...

here he says “I don’t like the possibility of him keying in on you.”

here he is straight up saying “I am worried about you”

(quietly hopes Lucien does exactly that to trigger more protective fjord instincts in the future and lots of angst based shippy shenaingans)

Fjord: Alright. More adventures tomorrow.

BECAUSE THAT’S ALL OK

THAT’S IT

HE SAID HIS PIECE, HE KEPT HER SAFE, MADE SURE SHE LAUGHED A LITTLE AND THAT’S ALL HE NEEDS... THAT AND MORE ADVENTURES BY HER SIDE

But then Jester hesitates

AND LOOK AT THAT, THE WAY SHE PULLS BACK LIKE SHE’S AFRAID IF SHE SAYS THE WRONG THING HE’LL CLOSE OFF

THE WAY HIS FACE SCRUNCHES WITH WORRY OVER WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE TROUBLING HER THAT SHE’S HESITATING TO SAY

Fjord: What?

Jester: H- How are you?

FJORD MELTING IMMEDIATELY:

The way he goes from super concerned to extremely soft in 0.2 seconds.

(i am ashley and ashley is me)

Jester: *explaining all the very valid reasons she has to be worried about Fjord too and all the crazy shit that happened to him only a few days ago*

Fjord: *bursting with feelings of love*

seriously travis pls have some mercy of my poor yearning soul

Also I wanna talk about the way Jester brings up Avantika.

Jester: She tried to pull you into the water... you guys had a thing... it must have been weird to see her all kinda dead and stuff... was it weird? And then you killed her... again...

The way she calls them “a thing” and the way she checks if it was “weird” for him to see her as undead really says a lot to me. I think Jester never quite got over the heartbreak during the pirate arc and part of her probably still thought that Fjord harbored some sort of feelings or attraction towards Avantika.

I think she believes whatever they two had was far more intimate than it actually was. Or, at the very least, Jester thinks it must have meant something to Fjord.

How could she not? The whole thing had her bursting with jealousy and pain and unresolved feelings... you can tell how anxious she is around this subject but also she needs to know if he’s alright because she cares too much

Fjord: It was weird. Yeah, it was weird, for sure. I wasn’t expecting that...

HE DOESN’T EVEN REGISTER IT AS AN “EX” THING I SWEAR

Fjord: I’m alright.

And so she finally relaxes.

Fjord: It feels like I keep trying to start newer chapters in my life and leave the old stuff behind and then it just... keeps popping up.

Fjord: It feels like it’s hard to... pursue something new, when the past is not dealt with.

YOU CAN’T SEE IT IN THE SCREENSHOTS BUT JESTER STARTS NODDING VERY GENTLY WHEN HE STARTS TALKING ABOUT NEW CHAPTERS AND MOVING ON

ALSO THIS

(ashley knows what I’m talking about)

Jester: Do we need to deal with the past?

SHE SAYS WE

BECAUSE AS USUAL THEY ARE A TEAM ALWAYS FIRST AND FOREMOST

AND IF THIS IS SOMETHING HE NEEDS TO DO SHE’S GOING TO HELP HIM AND BE BY HIS SIDE WITHOUT A DOUBT NO MATTER WHAT

Fjord: I think so.

Fjord: Yeah... I want to.

THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HER WHEN HE SAYS ‘I WANT TO’. HE WANTS TO HAVE A FUTURE WITH HER. HE WANTS TO LET GO OF THE PAST SO HE CAN HAVE A FUTURE WITH HER. HE’S LETTING HIMSELF ‘WANT’ THIS AND ADMITTING IT.

Fjord: I feel like I need to close all of that before...

AND THEN HE JUST GOES THROUGH THIS BLESSED FACE JOURNEY FOR 6 ENTIRE SECONDS

LOOK AT IT

AND THE WAY SHE SLOWLY SMILES LIKE SHE MIGHT KNOW WHAT HE MEANS

LOOK AT HER OWN FACIAL JOURNEY

ASHLEYYYYYYYYYY

And so Jester jumps into action mode offering her help.

and Fjord —once again— proves that he’s able and willing to open up to Jester about things that he’s keeping close to his chest... like Sabian.

Fjord: I um... I actually... I put a bounty out for S-Sabian.

IDK WHY THIS FACIAL EXPRESSION AMUSES ME THIS MUCH

THIS IS FJORD’S ‘IM ABOUT TO CONFESS SOMETHING PERSONAL TO JESTER FACE’ AND WE’VE SEEN IT BEFORE AT THE KILN AND IN RUMBLECUSP

Jester: A bo- When? How?

SHE’S SO BEWILDERED LMFAO

and a little offended that she didn’t know

and I think Fjord can tell by the way he quickly tries to excuse it as a way to keep Kotho occupied after the whole Vokodo ordeal

But Jester quickly gets back on track and starts looking for a way to help him with this. If finding Sabian is what Fjord wants —what he needs— right now, she’ll do anything to help him.

Jester: *describing how she would be able to help Fjord*

Fjord, who never had anyone be this ride or die for him ever and who is bursting at the seems with love for this kind and wonderful woman:

Fjord: Sure.

Jester: You want me to do it?

Fjord: Yeah.

THOSE HEART EYES SHOULD BE ILEGAL

Jester: *uses a sixth level spell to send a message for Fjord because this is totally her number one priority now and it’s not like they are dealing with stuff that literally drained her today or like they are stuck up north for god knows how long... nope... she needs to find a way to help Fjord right now*

Fjord:

okay okay okay

so after the message

you can see how Jester is worried that the news she finally found for him are bad news and not going to cheer him up

Jester: Oops

Fjord: No, no, no, no! No oops! That’s great! That’s great!

I love the way he rushes to reassure her, to make sure she knows that what she just did for him is amazing and means so much and please jester do not be sad about this because this already means so much to me you have no ideaaaaaa

Fjord: That’s... totally distracting but that’s great.

Fjord: Thank you.

Jester: You’re welcome! Now you know!

Fjord, with more feeling and emotion behind it like he wants to tell her that she and everything she does for him out of love mean the entire universe to him: Thank you.

Jester, blissfully unaware that he’s in love with him but delighted that she was able to help and that he is letting her in enough to help deal with his past: You’re welcome! I’m glad I could help!

Fjord, still not over how good she is and how diametrically different her kindness is compared to everything else he’s known in life so far and still after these many months shook and surprised by how wonderful she is: That’s very nice of you, I-

Jester: It’s just a (6th level) spell. Easy to do.

SHE HAS NO IDEA THAT WHAT HE MEANS ISN’T THE MAGIC NOR THE SPELL NOR THE INFORMATION... IT’S HER HELP AND SUPPORT THAT HE IS SO SHAKEN WITH.

Fjord: I.... will think about that all night.

Sure you will Fjord. We know you will. But we know it’s not about Sabien but about Jester’s kindness that you’re gonna be thinking all night. We know that’s what’s keeping you up. Not the past, the future.

AND OF COURSE

THE OBLIGATORY AWKWARD ENDING

Fjord: I’ll race you to the top!

Both: UP!

THEY ARE SO ADORABLE AND GOOFY AND PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER WTF HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE MY LIFE INSTEAD OF THINKING ABOUT THEM 24/7??

ANYWAY WHO IS READY FOR PIRATE ARC PART 2 AND MORE SHENANIGANS WITH THESE TWO WHILE FJORD GETS FINALLY READY TO MOVE FORWARD TOWARDS THE FUTURE HE WANTS WITH JESTER? I AM

#fjorester #fjord stone #jester lavorre #critical role #cr spoilers #sofia's nonsense

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365days365movies · 3 years

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February 18, 2021: The Danish Girl (Review)

Before I go into ANYTHING else...let’s talk about the actual Danish Girl, Lili Elbe, or Lili Ilse Elvenes.

Oh, uh, full warning, this is gonna be LONG, so skip to the bottom if you’re just here for the Review! OK, history time!

Now, what the film The Danish Girl notes about the beginning of the transition is pretty spot-on, from what I can tell. After marrying portrait painter Gerda Gottlieb in 1904, the two lived in Italy and France before moving to Paris in 1912. Yeah, that’s over 14 years before they’re shown doing so in the movie. Inaccuracy #1. In 1908 (here comes number 2), Elbe (Einar at the time) painted this portrait of trees along a fjord in Denmark.

Yeah, NOT in 1926, as the film says. But, yeah, that’s a nitpick, I recognize that. Anyway, the revelation came when model Anna Larssen (not “Ulla”, which is Inaccuracy #3) was late, and Gerda asked Elbe to fill in. When Larssen eventually showed up, she suggested the name “Lili”. Basically, this scene from the movie was pretty goddamn accurate.

Except for the dates, anyway. Because while the movie mostly takes place around 1926 and afterwards, this probably happened closer to 1920, in Paris. So, yeah, Lili spent a LOT more time as Lili in real life. Additionally, Lili was pretty goddamn public about the whole thing, inviting guests and hosting parties as herself, rather than as Einar. At the same time, Gerda was getting pretty goddamn famous for her paintings of Lili, like this one.

Which, yeah, are really good! Also, they were considered lesbian erotica by many! YEAH! And here’s a fun fact: Gerda may not have been straight-up straight. Yeah, the film and the book (we’ll get there) kind of ignored the fact that their marriage was annulled by the Danish government, not by the two of them. Inaccuracy #4. Now, obviously, their relationship ended, and Lili ended up getting together with a man (we’ll get there, too), but there are a LOT of unanswered questions about Gerda’s sexuality, and views of sexuality (which is barely hinted at in the “male gaze” speech in the beginning).

After the annulment, the two just...drifted apart. Their relationship dissolved, and the details on that are fuzzy. By 1930, Lili was headed on a completely different path. She wasn’t a painter like Einar (and it turns out that she thought of them as two entirely separate people, like two souls living in the same body, which the movie got mostly right), and she was mostly unsatisfied with her career, life, and other things. And that is where Drs. Erwin Gohrbandt and Magnus Hirschfeld come in, NOT Kurt Warnerkros...yet. He’d come in for the other five (YES FIVE) surgeries, but wouldn’t be involved with the first. Inaccuracy #5, and also #6, while we’re at it! See, the film would make you think that Lili was the first complete gender reassignment surgery, but she was actually the second. The first would be Dora Richter, in a procedure that was performed by Dr. Hirschfeld from 1922 - 1931. YEAH. BIG-ASS INACCURACY THERE. Here’s Dora, by the way:

Anyway, Lili had her first procedure, to remove the testicles, performed in 1930. In the same year, the divorce between Lili and Gerda was finalized, and Lili legally changed her name. Two more procedures were performed, the first to implant an ovary, and the second to remove the penis and scrotum. Inaccuracy #7, by the way. And, hey, let’s go for number 8! Let’s talk about Henrik, a dude who didn’t exist. He and Hans were both very loosely based on an art dealer named Claude Lejeune.

Claude was an art dealer (there’s the Hans part), and was indeed in love with Lili. They got together around early 1931, and he’d actually been in love with her for a good, long time. He proposed to marry Lili, and she accepted, also hoping that the two would be able to have children together. But to do that, it was believed that Lili would need a uterus. And, obviously, having children would be MILES more complicated than that in basically EVERY way, but this was early in medical science’s understanding of some of that biology.

In any case, however, Lili would need both a uterus and a vagina to feel whole. And so, the fourth surgery was scheduled. And she had that surgery in 1931, a couple of weeks after Dora Richter successfully had the same surgery performed. But, sadly, Lili wouldn’t be so lucky.

Lili’s body rejected the uterus, and while transplant rejections of any kind wouldn’t necessarily be fatal now, they definitely were back then. They attempted to remove it, but that subsequent 5th surgery caused infection, which caused a fatal heart attack three months later. Lili Elbe died on September 13, 1931, at the age of FORTY-EIGHT. Yeah, Inaccuracy #9.

By the way, you may be wondering: what about Dora Richter, the first successful person to get these surgeries? Well, she disappeared...in Germany...as the Nazis were coming into power...yeah. Fuckin’ YIKES.

And so, that’s the true story of Lili Elbe. And there are far more differences than that, I’m sure, but those 9 inaccuracies aren’t insignificant, that’s for sure. Although, it probably doesn’t help that the movie was based on a fictionalized book.

Oh, uh...did I not mention that? Yeah, this movie is based on The Danish Girl, by David Ebershoff, which means that this film is essentially a cinematic game of telephone. Which, uh...not great. Granted, Ebershoof made some other...interesting changes, which the film didn’t inherit. In the book, for example, Gerda is named Greta, and is American? Um...why? I dunno, it’s kind of weird. Oh, and that’s not including one more issue with the movie. But, you’ve waited long enough, huh? Recap of the film is here and here if you wanna check that out! Let’s get to the Review already!

Review

Cast and Acting: 8/10

I am...conflicted. So let me start here by saying that the acting in the film in and of itself is fantastic, all-around. Not a weak actor in here, that’s for sure. Let’s start with the side-roles, for once. Ben Whishaw, Matthias Schoenaerts, and Amber Heard are all good. Heard’s accent is a little shaky, but they’re still all solid performances. OK, how about Alicia Vikander? She’s great! And she won the Oscar for...Best Supporting Actress. Um...wait...Supporting? But not Best Actress? Uh...OK. That’s a little weird, let’s be honest here. But, Alicia Vikander did deserve that win over...oooooooh, Rooney Mara in Carol? Maybe not...damn.

And OK...let’s get into the elephant in the room, huh?

Eddie Redmayne is fantastic as Einar Wegener/Lili Eber, and I genuinely think he had a great shot to win Best Actor...but, yeah, Leonardo DiCaprio definitely deserved it, I think that goes without saying. Hell, that year had a SOLID line-up for best actor. And Redmayne had even won it the year before for The THeory of Everything, another biography where he played Stephen Hawking. But ALL of that said...HNNNNNNNNNG, there should have been a transgender actor cast in this role, ideally. Now, I’m fully aware how difficult that would be, as Hollywood isn’t extraordinarily diverse in terms of including trans actors in massive mainstream projects. It’s better now, but it’s nowhere near ideal. But if anybody knows an actor who would’ve fit this role and performed it well, I’m DEFINITELY interested. So, despite that controversy, Redmayne was pretty goddamn great in this role. But, uh...that doesn’t mean everything is perfect...

Plot and Writing: 5/10

OK, that seems low, I know. But it’s pretty goddamn damning that this movie was based off of a heavily fictionalized book instead of the actual life story of Lili Eber and Gerda Gottlieb. And because of that, there are not only some missed opportunities, but some straight-up damning inaccuracies. That’s a set of pretty poor decisions, I tell you what. Not sure why Lucinda Coxon came to that decision when adapting this screenplay, but it wasn’t exactly nominated for Best Screenplay. And the writing certainly isn’t bad, but it is...overly saccharine sometimes, especially for a film based (loosely) on a true story. I dunno...just not the best set of choices here, sorry to say.

Directing and Cinematography: 8/10

Tom Hooper shouldn’t direct musicals. However, since this wasn’t a musical, directing and cinematography here is pretty damn good! Real talk, this is a gorgeous looking movie, and the way shots are framed are fantastic. Perfect? Weeeeeeeell...given the fact that painting is a main focus of the film, for both Gerda and Einar, there should’ve been more painter-quality shots in here, I think. And while the cinematography by Danny Cohen is pretty fantastic, I can’t say that it’s perfect. Still, in terms of lighting and general skill, it’s still quite a good looking movie.

Production and Art Design: 10/10

But the deficiencies in the direction are EASILY compensated for by the production design! Like, hot DAMN, this is a good looking movie, like I said! That goes from the construction of the sets, to the gorgeous outfits all over the place, especially Lili’s outfits. Some iconic pieces of wardrobe there, that’s for sure! But if I have ONE complaint...this movie never once felt like the 1920s. Yup, good old anachronistic complaints from me again! Yeah, I’ll change the record one of these days, I promise. But even with that, it’s hard to ignore just how good this movie looks, to be honest. It’s just...gorgeous.

Music and Editing: 8/10

As I type this, I’m listening to a track of the film on YouTube, and it is a beautifully delicate tune. I’m not sure that I’d be able to associate it with the film if presented to me on its own, but it’s definitely a nice track to listen to by itself. Playlist worthy? For somebody, almost certainly, but not for me. One of these days, a film like that’s gonna pop up, I swear. But for now, Alexandre Desplat and his score are gonna stay off my iPhone. This really is a nice score, though, I promise. Editing by Melanie Ann Oliver is pretty good as well, and I’ve no complaints about it, to be honest. Overall, this side of things was quite nice, if not the most notable thing I’ve ever seen or heard.

I might have been a little harsh, but it’s still got an 78%.

This is a good movie, but...I dunno, the inaccuracies do bug me. Hell, there are WAY more than what I’d mentioned, and I mentioned a lot. Not to mention the other glaring issue: no trans people at any stage of the production? Really? No script consultants, no writers, no NTOHING? That’s...egregiously bad. Like, holy shit, guys. And, yes, this includes Redmayne, because even though he performed admirably in the role...I dunno. I’m no expert on ANY of this, as a cissexual dude with cissexual experience, but it feels a little...reductive, is all. Like I said, if any other actors have been suggested for this role, I’d love to know. The whole thing feels...I don’t know, just not great.

And by the way, that’s without even TOUCHING the question as to whether or not this film is authentic to the trans experience. Again, I have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA, but I’ve also heard that this film isn’t universally acclaimed in the trans community, so to speak. And I’m definitely interested in the reasons for that. All I know is this: from the perspective of a complete outsider, I was intrigued by this films view of the transgender experience, specifically as seen in the earliest days of those realizations happening and being publicly known and reported on. And that’s all I can really comment on, in truth.

WHOOF. That was a goddamn topic, huh? And now, I’m going to continue on the the month of romance with...wait, the 19th is my 5-year anniversary with my GF, pictured here:

Ravishing. Anyway, I think I’ll let her pick from my choices for this next one. Hold on a sec...OK, then. Sing it with me now! AND DO I DREEEEEAM AGAAAAIN, FOR NOW I FIIIIIIIIIIIIIND...

February 19, 2021: The Phantom of the Opera (2004)

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violet-t-9 · 3 years

Text

Check in on my (not very realistic) wish list for episode 138

1. Nobody dies in the battle against Cree, even temporarily (looking at you, squishy wizards). Everybody survives and defeats her relatively easily.

Ayyye I mean Cree was one vs. 6 basically and of course it was easy enough, I expected this. Bye Cree, I won’t really miss you... WAIT she got controlled after death?? Well, the actual Cree fight was still easy so I’m counting this. The flesh monster version also took less than like, 20 seconds in-game time to beat lol.

2. Caleb or Beau’s eye power come into play whether for them or against them during the combat (telepathy also counts).

Heyyyy Caleb and Beau could pick up on the radio! That is helpful- oh he turned Cree into a flesh monster using the eyes... oh NO everyone has eyes now except Jester and Yasha. Group telepathy could be useful?? I guess??

3. Beau and Caleb discover the third function of their eyes if there is one (besides true sight and telepathy).

Nope I have no idea. I’m assuming that seeing through illusions and dark vision are separate at this point. That’s fine considering the huge twist that almost all of them have eyes now, like hello?? Caleb also wondered if he has a fourth power now, which we still don’t know about.

4. The party gets some much needed rest, even a short one, after defeating Cree (Bonus: heroes’ feast).

Hey the time shunt thing worked! PERFECTLY! With a 30 and a 24! I love two wizards, my absolute beloved. THANKS ESSEK (and Caleb, but Essek mostly).

5. This is a long shot but still hoping for any mention/sighting of Yussa.

Thanks Caleb for mentioning Yussa! Also Beau was able to try to connect to Yussa thanks to the eyes too! What a cool moment. Also thanks everybody for agreeing to help him lol. Caleb banished him! They saved him! Yayyyyy.

6. More nightmarish body horror and screaming from the cognouza citizens (look, listen, I loved last episode okay, Matt is awesome, horror is my jam).

Yes for the intestine corridor and flesh puddles, also for Cree transformation, also for the threshold crest vault mouth opening thing and for literally everything else in this episode need I explain? As a student of science I am very much enjoying the weird physiology connections with the Cognouza.

7. They meet another member of the Somnovem who offers more information.

Jester’s Calm emotion what a queen, they did meet a Somnovem. Wow I never thought I’d find eternal love so creepy but thanks Gaudius. Gaudius is apparently against Fastidan and Culpasi, nice. Good to know that the Somnovem Omega still does not get along lol.

8. Beau and Yasha’s PDA or power couple moments (bonus: they talk about mind control, the eyes, or feelings).

OH WOW Yasha has IDEAS about Beau wearing a red cape does she now lol, not subtle at all as expected. Get a room you guys! Not much talking can be done at this point, but nice.

9. Fjord and Jester’s conversation or domesticity (bonus: they talk about hope for the future).

“All we care about is love and unity” LMAO JESTER taking your chance to smooch as much as possible. I’m counting this moment you cannot convince me otherwise.

10. Artagan/Sprinkle comes into play/is mentioned and interaction with Jester.

Yep, they both talked (well, hissed in one case) with Jester. Artagan thought about them going to the feywild too! Fun.

11. Obligatory wish for Essek’s fancy dunamancy or magical items (Bonus: we get to see more high-damage AOE offensive spells).

Magic missile again! At least that will never miss. Sad that he can’t do AOE ever with the party around lol. ALSO THE TIME SHUNT BY THE TWO WIZARDS! The 30 from Essek (dunamancy master indeed!) and the dirty 24 from Caleb, NICE.

12. Obligatory wish for Caleb’s polymorph spell on himself or a party member.

Jester’s polymorph spell was cool too! Jestape? Japester?? I like Japester. Polymorph! Jester’s interactions are also my beloved. It’s not Caleb’s spell, so I’m not counting this one.

13. The party tracks down Lucien and tries to reach him by mentioning Molly.

Well, they attempted to track down Lucien, but really it’s the other way around.

14. Obligatory wish for Essek’s room in the tower (it will stay until it happens).

Nope, as expected.

15. Obligatory wish for Cad being a MVP in and out of combat also for him to use decompose more on the city, I’m curious to see what happens.

That path to the grave, what a MVP move Cad. TWO TIMES! TWO TIMES! For the HDYWTDT from Veth too! I knew it, Cad is a combat genius. Also nice blight on the fleshy ceiling. Also plane shift to the fire plane! Also that curse word speech what a king.

16. Veth one-on-one RP interaction with any other party member - we had some good tag teams recently, like Veth and Beau, Veth and Yasha, Veth and Essek... I want to see more!

We don’t really have time for RP because this episode was super action-packed but we did have a bunch of nice short moments!

17. Yasha or Fjord being absolutely freaked out/creeped out by the city.

Well to be fair EVERYBODY was super creeped out, so...

18. The empire siblings don’t get another red eye (well, hopefully this will happen if they won’t get a full rest).

Well ironically, Beau and Caleb DID NOT get another red eye during the whole party members gaining red eyes scene- Nope, Caleb got one more. Honestly, pretty excited and anxious at the same time.

19. Somebody check in on Essek’s mental/physical state because for a newbie adventurer he is doing suspiciously well - I wonder if he is just desensitized at this point.

Poor Essek was very physically hurt and also shook shook by Cree being transformed... so not entirely desensitized. He even failed the wisdom saving throw OH NO HE IS GETTING EYES ISN’T HE CALLING IT RN READ IN BOOKS I know what book is kinda associated with a wisdom save. Update: I KNEW IT, and I don’t care that nobody will believe me that I called it. Still sad that nobody really got to role play much, but I’m enjoying the action.

20. Caleb uses more fire or his customized spells (last episode’s awesome Widogast’s web of fire got me missing all his unique spells).

Disintegrate followed by CAT’S IRE HYPE and the clutch immovable object used for the first time what’s sexier than wizards NOTHING.

21. Fjord being the leader of the group in any way or just does something very impressive (go Fjord Tough).

Nice hexblade curse and triple Eldritch Blasts Fjord! Warlock powers let’s go! Also, nice counterspell! That divine smite + crit star razor oof that’s such a beautiful 80 damage. VERY impressive indeed.

22. We get to see new spells/abilities/features gained by their level-up! That will probably not come into play until a long rest, but one can hope.

MIND BLANK AT 8TH LEVEL what a perfect spell for Caleb. They got a long rest thanks to the mini Beacon! I love it. Jester and Cad showed off some spells as well!

23. Lucien physically reacting to the party’s attempts to bring up Molly’s memories/moments and showing confusion/hesitation.

Well they didn’t get to try anything really, Lucien spent most of the time doing his cool, dramatic and drawn-out villain monologue thing, also his maniac laughter scared me way more than the scream from last episode.

24. Obligatory wish for everyone to remain relatively happy and alive by the end of the episode except Cree (I have a feeling that Lucien ain’t dying this episode), and the episode ends on a terrifying cliffhanger as always.

Rip Cree, and what do you know, cliffhanger! Gosh I love this show.

Bonus:

Nice dimension door Jester, she is SO on task and such a key player in these crucial moments!! What a queen, it’s thanks to her (and Caleb, but it’s her idea first!) that they got to the crest so quickly and got rid of it. I repeat, QUEEN.

Veth’s first shot AND the final shot were awesome in terms of damage, rogues am I right?

Wow what a confrontation. I thought Lucien was all for the Somnovem but apparently he is... just super chaotic?? And wants to rule them all?? What was that all about? Lucien just gets more and more complex and I’m conflicted because now they might need to fight him, the city, or both. This is getting super complicated and I can’t wait for the next episode.

Well guys, this session made me scream in joy and also feel what it’s like to be high on adrenaline. The episodes just keep getting better and better. I literally could not care less if this is the final arc - if it is, it’s a damn good one. I love the cast so much, I love critical role so much. I wish it could be Thursday every day of the week!

#cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #c2e138 #the mighty nein #manifest list #cr liveblog #critical role #campaign 2

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seafleece · 4 years

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Hey, random question, but what do you think are the M9's love languages?

oh, anon, you absolutely did not sign up for this and i am so sorry, but here we are. i had to look up the five types and keep them in the google doc to remind myself what they were, but uhh here’s almost 4000 words of character analysis and discussion of debatable quality

jester:

my initial thought was quality time— an obvious and painful one, as it’s the one her mother wasn’t able to provide. i think the sleeper, though, for jester, is acts of service.

with beau, this especially shows up in reference to healing— jester having a more healing-focused cleric around is a big relief, especially for someone so close to warlock status that she almost was one, but very notably, she very much wants to heal beau. she specifically apologizes for not doing so in the chantry, and attributes that to beau’s absence rather than anything else; more generally, there’s a huge amount of distress on jester’s part when beau is hurt, and that she wants to be the one to heal beau (notably, with the gorgon, she RAN to beau, was immediately upset both times beau started getting petrified, and even dissuaded caduceus or caleb from using their turn to heal beau so she could instead, making sure to be Right There even while nott was applying the oil). she also seems to really value the instances when beau does things for her, especially since there are specific acts that beau reserves for jester (engaging with religion in any capacity, wearing a dress for jester and more broadly allowing jester to pick her clothes, a concept which beau probably has an explicitly negative association with from her mother).

it’s also muddled jester up the worst when it comes to relationships she understands less— the “kiss” with fjord in the temple that was a vehicle for giving jester air, most specifically, comes to mind— and she’s really come to terms with this by realizing that romantic feelings weren’t really what he was expressing, and that it wasn’t necessarily what she was feeling, either. it’s noticeable in how she describes her relationship with the traveler— she feels like her service to him is doing little things for him, and asks, when she’s unsure, when the traveler failed to act on her behalf when they were kidnapped, if she did something wrong to make him angry, and literally desecrates a temple to make up for it as soon as they’re back in town.

and the thing is, quality time isn’t really what was lacking in her relationship with marion— marion probably did have time to spend with jester for at least a little while every day. the problem is that marion simply couldn’t provide jester with things that she needed: access to the outside world and companionship. she had to learn from near-scratch how to navigate relationships of varying intensities, and it shows with her initial zeroing in on fjord as an iteration of the dashing sailor her momma told her about, as well as her more slow-burn come to trust and really invest in and love beau, because she’s never had a relationship like that with a girl, and maybe didn’t even know it was something she could have, or something she could want.

jester’s her proudest when she’s doing things for other people, even if they maybe wouldn’t love her doing it if they knew— threatening beau’s dad because she hates that he hurt her, hearing that beau was thinking about leaving and marching in to modify memory a hag, writing astrid a letter because caleb seems like he liked her, asking essek if he likes caleb because caleb seems to like essek, painting yasha’s room in the xhorhaus, finding outfits for everyone. she struggles with how to rein in showing it and thinking first about the potential consequences, and is unsure how to navigate what it means when she’s shown it in return, but it’s messy and heartfelt and sincere. with her mom, she really clearly appreciates when her mom does do things for her— providing a home for her friend’s family, allowing the m9 to stay in the chateau, coming to the party with them despite her agoraphobia. i’m sort of banking on a scene where jester talks to her about it, apologizes for leaving, and reaffirms that it means a lot to her that marion is stepping out of her comfort zone for her.

beau:

words of affirmation. this is NO DOUBT something her parents didn’t give her, maybe ever. this is baked into her relationship with them— she knew that her father wanted a boy, he probably Told her this, and she wasn’t one. it’s something she could literally never be, an aspect she would be forever resented for, that would tinge everything her father ever said to her. her mother also probably didn’t give her much if any affirmation, as she was trying to police and fix beau’s behavior to avoid thoreau’s anger for both of them, and never properly elaborated to beau that her intention was to keep beau from being punished (not that it would have made it okay, for the record). it’s also why her conversation with her parents in 92 immediately threw her off, because for once they actually told her she’d impressed them, that she’d done good, and it’s rough as hell to see that.

unfortunately, it’s also the thing she’s least likely to get from everyone else unless she’s at her worst, because almost everyone else, including fanon, seems to have profoundly absorbed this idea that beau is rude and abrasive and sarcastic and she’s just. not. she might have been at the start, but she’s always been especially soft with jester, she and caleb are very mutually assured about the sort of affection they show each other, she’s always been either openly flirting with or just sort of tenderly awkward with and trying around yasha, she and caduceus have a fun and pretty peaceful dynamic i always love to see, and we know caduceus, for at least a while, considered beau his favorite.

then, there’s the characters she’s known for butting heads with the most: fjord, with whom she’s developing a sibling dynamic to rival hers with caleb and really obviously is ride or die for; nott, who used to openly insult beau and just about everyone else, and who is now 1/3 of the chaos crew beau is also in; and molly, whose death was a HUGE turning point for beau in terms of a) taking stock of her morals and how she intended to act on them and b) expressing love for someone so you know they know it, before it’s too late.

jester seems to see this the most, no surprise there, and dairon also sees a lot of potential in beau not because she’s strong or fast (she’s from a martially focused monastery), but because she’s smart. dairon talks about and to beau very affectionately compared to other mentor/guardian figures she’s had, and i think it means a lot to her coming from both jester and dairon. she certainly returns the favor for both of them.

fjord:

this one isn’t immediately apparent, so i’m gonna start by talking about the nature of his relationship with caduceus (and see where it gets me).

okay, i lied, i’m starting with molly.

fjord and molly had a thing. it’s clear in retrospect, and i’ve talked about it, but i think it has to do with where fjord was in his quest to reinvent himself. molly was someone who, for all intents and purposes, had flawlessly become a new person— not necessarily because of a concerted effort to change who lucien was, but a different person nonetheless. fjord wanted desperately to believe that that was attainable for him, and thus saw a lot in investing in molly. molly was a silent affirmation that fjord could really pull this off, could really reinvent himself and be fine.

also, molly was hot. enough said.

caduceus, on the other hand, offered something different. caduceus came along right before fjord’s willingness to help uk’otoa was first tested— fjord rose to the occasion, but the whole time there was someone new along, someone whose faith in his deity seemed assured. assured, that’s something fjord never had.

afterward, he got to see what it meant to believe in a god like that, and he started to want in. caduceus seems like a very honest person— though really, it’s just because m9 doesn’t know the right questions to ask him— and his god is the god of the sea, too, right? fjord really lost a rock in molly the way i don’t think a lot of people realize, and it’s why his swallowing the summer’s dance felt so meaningful. he was keeping a part of molly with him, and i wonder if he misses that part of his falchion. after he lost his inspiration for recreation, he started to put stock into authenticity as the answer, and caduceus as the vehicle. and the wildmother was very accepting, too, took him in like a lost sheep.

where fjord is now, i think he values the covenant (which i realize i actually define later, so if i forget to reorganize these before i post, then oops) in a similar way to caleb. more specifically, though, he decidedly the word owe in talking to beau about the group’s relationship, which, among other things, speaks to acts of service. fjord has work to do to earn his place as a paladin of the wildmother (and a good amount of work to do indeed, if getting trounced by darrow was any indication), and he feels the need to repay caduceus for his help, companionship, and guidance. fjord also gets hurt and KO’d. a lot. i think he takes it on the chin as his role in the group— that’s his job, and he has faith in caduceus and jester to keep him up. they’re not done yet, they haven’t finished serving one another, so beau leaving is of considerable offense (near-mutinous, to be specific).

caleb:

words MEAN SHIT to caleb, you can tell in the way he talks. everyone remembers the times he’s told nott he loves her, he responds best to beau because i think he really loves the way she talks, he shows his feelings in really passionate speeches to nott, to beauregard, and most recently to essek. there’s absolutely a reason why so many goddamn quotes from campaign 2 are attributed to this dude, and it’s because he monologues like a fucking champ. their group is named after his accent.

as for receiving love, though, i think it’s a little different. we know from talks that he’s placed a lot of value on the things jester has done for him, and moreover to be herself as someone who gives recklessly, but as far as we know he doesn’t intend to do anything with it. with nott, i’m tempted to create a new category that’s something like a covenant? he and nott agreed to travel together and help each other under the worst conditions, and they’ve stuck to this fastidiously. this covenant, this commitment to the group, is something he extends to everyone— he is not willing to walk away from this, and hasn’t been for a long time, he believes in all of them, truly, what they can do— and cherishes the fact that everyone has kept this, except for two very specific moments. beau, when she introduced the threat of her leaving the party, and yasha, when she was taken over by obann. for beau, he actually seemed fairly quiet compared to fjord, and i’m not sure yet on why this is, other that i think he trusted fjord and jester to talk her down. as for yasha, he seems to be really invested in commiserating with yasha as two haunted ones (literally), and sees her as someone who also really values the group but sees her ability to belong as tarnished by what she’s done.

for the purposes of this, i’m gonna refer to it as that, as a covenant (yes i’m a failed church kid, what of it) and as separate from acts of service, because it’s more akin to the promise of one major, permanent act of service to each other. i wonder if it’s this steadfastness in that idea that partially led caduceus to continue and develop the idea of his role, because caleb and the rest of team cockroach, as i call them, were gonna keep that covenant if it killed them, and caduceus could keep them from getting killed, at the very least, if he entered into it.

but anyway, that covenant now extends to essek, if he decides to take it. and if he does, that will mean something infinite to caleb, i think.

caduceus: acts of service.

okay. i wanna talk about caduceus and danger.

caduceus doesn’t heal himself. we know this. he heals everyone else, and not himself.

i’ve been checking critrole stats on this, and if i’m reading correctly, he has taken the most damage (157) in one episode than anyone else. and it’s not a small margin. the closest is yasha (129) and i’m almost certain that’s from the episode where she decided to literally get attacked until she passed out. i was trying to guess which episode this was from, and then it hit me: probably the episode where he fucking died, right? because it really just never came up again.

caduceus has: started to drown at least 3 times in his first month on the job, been killed by nott, been beaten near to death when yasha was charmed, and been very quietly and very badly stabbed in the back by a disappearing assassin. he’s also died at home, as a family tradition.

there’s a million better meta posts about caduceus’s relationship with death, or even about him not healing himself, but I just want to set it as potential precedent for the idea that caduceus, to some degree, sees value in himself as someone who doesn’t mind dying in a fight. for one thing, it’s been a temporary thing almost from day one with m9, as jester immediately invested in diamonds when they got back to town. it’s not his first rodeo, either, and his family has normalized death to an, and i say this more because of how it’s affected him rather than because i dislike the idea of normalizing death, an upsetting degree.

giving healing, that’s his job, but eliminating himself as someone who needs help or healing, well, that’s healing in a way, too, right? if he doesn’t get healed, it’s more for everyone else. worst comes to worst, jester can heal him if need be. or, y’know. not heal him.

caduceus’s relationship with m9 has noticeable transaction rhetoric, and i wonder where that really fits in with his family. obviously, his role in the family was implied as the one who stayed behind, and his parents definitely imparted a need for him to be stable, a role he’s continued to fill for m9 to his quiet detriment but i think he’s also jumped on the opportunity to finally be the older one, the wiser one, of the group. there’s a power caduceus has over the group that’s really understated— they just sort of listen to him, even if what he’s saying doesn’t actually make sense, because he started with nott, beau, and caleb as a wise savior, a protector, and upon finding the others, it’s not like jester, fjord, or yasha were filling that role. molly certainly wasn’t either— it’s funny, how in retrospect caduceus seems inevitable to the group because they really didn’t have anyone like him. the closest thing to a voice of reason they had was fjord and caleb, and early on, caleb was not in great standing because of his and nott’s perceived standoffishness, and fjord threw up ocean water, so like, what’s up with that, right?

at the very least, he definitely believes he owes the mighty nein something, a role to fill, a job to perform. a service to act out, if you will. his job is to heal, and he does less healing if he heals himself. he seems to view him taking a hit as a win, in a way— it’s a hit that someone else doesn’t take.

i have a lot of hope that reconnecting with his family and seeing how he’s grown while they haven’t allows him to revisit his notions of what he needs to be, and i have a lot of hope that moving forward, he’ll be able to invest more in the other motif he’s developed, which is gift-giving: fjord, with the star razor; his sisters, with the hat (which seems small but like. boy’s had it for a while) and the flute; and, most recently, in helping jester pick out everyone’s outfits. it allows him to feel like he’s giving something to the people he cares about without it hurting him.

yasha:

truly everything. it’s hard to get a read because yasha really just soaks in all the love m9 wants to give her. if i had to guess further, i’d say we should look at her and molly’s relationship, because molly’s the only character we’ve seen her unabashedly love, and the thing that stood out most to me was physical touch. that echoes really depressingly with her “fight” in 89— she got something out of being that close to someone, even if it felt like reparation or atonement, and i think the only person in m9 who’s been really unafraid to touch yasha is jester.

i’ll admit i have a soft spot for yashter, but, like, it’s there, right? the obvious trust, the faith jester has in yasha and the fear and turmoil when that was tested? i remember really clearly jester giving yasha a piggyback ride in zadash in an early ep, and like— when’s the last time someone was strong enough to do that? when’s the last time someone wanted to do that for yasha? everyone’s mistrusted yasha to some degree for the entire run of the campaign, and, like, how much did her hopes to get close to everyone else just evaporate after the king’s cage? does she really even believe she can have it again? she was so close— jester trusted her fully, she and beau were in a comfortable mutual place with flirting, she’d talked to caduceus and jester about zuala, she even felt comfortable picking up nott and throwing her around (which, by the way, i love their dynamic).

she seems to have leaned more into the protective, threatening stance since they got her back, which, if she’s comfortable with it, is just fine— maybe she’s shifting more towards acts of service, but i just hope it isn’t her just accepting the idea that everyone will always be afraid of her, that she won’t be close like that again. because molly wasn’t afraid of her. jester wasn’t, and i don’t think she is, now— but fjord showed a lot of distrust, and i think yasha’s scared of the degree to which she hurt beau and how to even broach that discussion, and she attacked them, how could they ever forgive her or trust she wouldn’t do it again?

(i wish i had a happier end to this, so i’ll just say that she did seem comfortable last ep, and that she may or may not have interest in getting a tattoo from jester? interesting stuff.)

veth:

on a person to person level, veth definitely feels she and caleb are acting on the promise they’ve made to help each other— now she’s reached it, things are a bit more nebulous, but it’s obvious she wants to stick around for him. i’ll admit, her words to everyone in 97 were a bit surprising to me— she hasn’t really been good at conveying emotion like that before unless she’s desperate or really upset, and i imagine it was something she started planning in her head to say to everyone as soon as the first ritual didn’t work. that might be, i think, what she felt as relief, just not being able to articulate what she wanted to say to everyone.

as for her family, veth believes she owes her best self to yeza and luc— she kept herself from them not because she couldn’t have gone back, but because she felt like someone else, like someone worse, and the exaggerated tendencies from her previous life only reinforced this— she didn’t believe she deserved to be around them, before now. before caleb, i don’t know if she had any hope for returning to them at all, and he changed that entirely.

i’m also very interested in why veth is able to reconcile her marriage with yeza as veth with her loving caleb as nott, and if she sort of considers herself as two different people. we’ve seen so little of what she feels comfortable expecting from other people— for now, i’d say acts of service seems appropriate? but maybe something closer to just. fulfilling promises.

bonus: for the other two who are considered part of the mighty nein

kiri:

words of affirmation. i’m a HUGE kenku stan, anyone who’s played d&d with me knows this, and i’m especially fascinated with the relationship with words when you can only speak the words you hear/remember. on the most basic level, if you speak to kiri, you are giving her a gift, you’re giving her the ability to speak, too. and if those words are affirming, then she can say them back! and you’re giving them to her, in a sense, to use as she pleases and repeat them to herself, even, and i just love that image— her, to herself, saying “i love you” in other people’s voices. i’m ride or die for kenkus, and kiri started it.

essek:

okay, so almost everyone in the m9 could be read as needing words of affirmation, because it’s so clear that they need more love and knowledge of love than they’ve received, and have found it in each other. essek has quite literally found it in m9 for the first time. he absolutely needs all of these, like, ASAP, but i think it’s what everyone says to him that get him the most. caleb’s speech, obviously, but it’s also them casually referring to him as their friend, it’s jester’s messages, even if he’s busy. it’s important to say, though, that i think it’s a specific type of affirmation: things that have nothing to do with his magic ability (and moreover, any of these gifts that have nothing to do with it). essek’s built his entire life on the idea that he is someone incredibly powerful and smart for his age— m9 are probably the first people to make him feel like he was more than that, because they want to know about the rest of him, and in becoming friends with them, he’s confronting the fact that he doesn’t really believe there is a rest of him. they want to know a part of himself that he at best has neglected and has been neglected by others, and at worst that he believes does not exist. when they talk about him as a friend, it adds to who he can be. he’s seeing, for the first time, that he can exist as someone else than his abilities and his ambition.

i initially started off with words of affirmation and he clearly needs that, but i think he really just needs all of these in a very specific way: he needs to feel love that is not based in merit, that pertains to who he actually is in this life rather than what he can become in the next, that values the life he’s living right now, because he’s not getting that from the dynasty. it seems like a low bar, maybe, to people who only have the one life, as far as we know, but his arc this campaign shows that it really, really isn’t.

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yesiamplease · 4 years

Text

A Life Never Had

Words: 1,062

Summary: Everyone has nights where they just can't sleep, lying awake daydreaming to pass the time. Essek is no different, as he lays there thinking of a life he could've never had.

A/N: I posted this on ao3 two months ago and wasn't sure about posting it here(I'm on mobile and don't know how to share the link). I went back and forth a lot, but if I'm going to do it then I wanted to do it before Essek shows up again.

Essek laid there, various feelings swimming in his mind. He felt sad, relieved, scared, regretful, self-righteous, angry, both trapped and free. He took a deep breath and turned on his side to face the wall. He was tired, very tired, but not enough in the right way to sleep. He half expected to get a random message from Jester, it should be about 3am by now, but he put that thought out of his mind. He started thinking, thinking about his life, could’s and could not’s.

What if things had been different? What if you never knew what I had done? Or what if I’d met you three and a half years ago? Would I have still done it? Maybe you would’ve found out and talked me out of it. Maybe I wouldn’t have considered it in the first place if I’d had you. How would that have gone? Heh, I’d probably just embarrass myself, trying to be good. I was never ‘good,’ I don’t think I ever could be. After meeting you and seeing what a good person is, I know I couldn’t.

But I’d try, I’d try for you. And maybe we’d leave, go somewhere far, where no one has ever even heard of Wynandir. Adventuring is NOT for me, but maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to join for a small excursion or two. I think I’d like that, I hope you’d like it too. Maybe in our travels we’d find a nice place, a good peaceful place that we’d happily move to. A beautiful house with plenty of room, lots of books on lots of shelves and cat-themed knick-knacks all around. A study we’d share, so we could work together whenever we wanted to. I could teach you new things, and I bet you’d have plenty to teach me too. Late nights, just you and me sitting and reading by each other’s side. A comfortable silence. A blissful silence. I’d get sad when you’d have to go off on some adventure, but you’d always come back and we’d have each other again. Maybe even one day, in the distant far off future, after a long time we might decide to officiate that arrangement, if you came to think of me as good enough.

It would be small, with no specific seating arrangement. There’d be no point in having one side be mine and one side yours when I’d have no one to invite anyway. We’d have to discuss who would be the officiator. Jester would do a fine job, I’m sure, but I don’t know if she’s technically qualified. Fjord as a ship captain is, though, but Caduceus would be a good option, too. I don’t really care about the decorations that much, but it would be fun to have a theme. Maybe Sun and Moon? Cliche, but classic. You could pick out the cake, I don’t really care for sweets. I’d probably wear something black and purple with dots of different colors to look like stars. I could see you wearing white and gold, and you'd be wearing a wreath of flowers in your hair. I'd probably be wearing one, too. I can’t guarantee I wouldn’t cry while reciting my vows to you. I can’t guarantee I wouldn’t cry while listening to your vows to me. I’d have to use prestidigitation before the reception. And during. And after, too. Speeches, a toast, dinner shifting into a party. I wouldn’t mind dancing if I spent the evening dancing with you.

And after some time, maybe, possibly, we could think about adopting a child or two, or three. Three is a good number. You would probably make an excellent father, and I’d do my best by them, too. We’d have to think of good ways to discipline, ways that don’t involve pain, and to be sure to encourage more than one part of who they are. They’d be more well rounded that way. As for schooling, we could try teaching them, I liked teaching you. Teaching children would be different, of course, but I’d go slow and be kind. I’m sure I could figure out how to make it work. We’d also need to be sure to show them we love them. I would make sure they knew I loved them. I’d hold them to hold them, and I’d kiss them to kiss them, not to get something out of them or as a ‘reward’ or for leverage. I...

Essek felt hot tears well as he forced his eyes tighter shut. His arms wrapped around himself as he curled up, keeping from making any sound.

I would show them that I loved them, and that they wouldn’t have to impress me for me to be proud of them. And when I’d inevitably mess up and hurt them, I’d acknowledge what I did and do anything to make it right. And hopefully, when they’d grow up, they’d feel like they would always have a home and a family. Like if they needed to come back, they could, and they’d always have a place if they needed somewhere to go. Whatever they wanted, whatever they needed, they wouldn’t be ignored. I’d love them. We’d love them. We wouldn’t keep them from the world, but we’d make sure their scars never ran as deep. We’d help them grow, and they’d go out on their own and hopefully make the world a brighter place, maybe bring home some grandchildren, but there’d be no pressure for that.

We could continue on like that. Maybe...grow old...together...? I don’t have to look like me, I don’t have to be a drow or an elf or whatever else. It would be easier out in the world as a human, right? It would be less painful to see, at least. And then I wouldn’t have to live without you, or at least no where near as long. We could be that elderly couple that sits on their porch every morning with blankets and coffee, silently reading next to each other like we’d always do. We could...

Essek was snapped out of his fantasy, hearing sobs from further down the hall. He was annoyed, at least he had the self control to keep his crying silent. He couldn't judge, though. They're probably here for the long haul, at least he gets to be executed in the morning.

#critical role #essek thelyss #shadowgast #fanfic #Sorry

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unicyclehippo · 4 years

Note

This isn't really a question or a prompt or anything but i was thinking about beau & leylas slow dancing 😌 i wanted you to Be Aware of it

There’s an event being held at the Lucid Bastion. A gathering of the dens to remind them of what is important in this time of unforeseen peace following the talks. What is important is mentioned in a brief welcoming speech—unity, cooperation, momentum leading into discovery, all that propaganda shit—but from the looks of things at the party, it’s very small foods and a truly colossal amount of some amber-coloured drink that goes down sweet but kicks like a horse with the afterburn.

Beau digs it.

She’s on her second when the Taskhand finds her. Them, actually. The entirety of the Mighty Nein had quickly decided that this? This whole...thing? So far from their bailiwick—even clever, groomed Caleb, even charming Fjord—that it is safest to remain pressed against the wall of the chamber with Cad keeping an eye out for any- and every-thing. The only outside excursions from their exclusion is when Veth and Beau are sent to steal the drinks and food.

She’s sipping from her glass when Caduceus clears his throat.

‘That man is making his way toward us,’ he says, low and pleasant as ever. There’s a line of tension that strings him up though and he hums when it’s plucked again, the man stepping gracefully through the crowd.

‘What’s he look like? Where is he?’

‘Tall gentleman, dark elven. Walking past another dark elf,’

‘Just tell me like twelve o’clock, three o’clock,’

‘I don’t think that’s the time at all, Beau,’ Caduceus tells her, pulling his eyes from the interloper to look down at her, bemused. ‘Mister Cale—‘

‘Just tell me where he is, Caduceus.’

‘Oh.’ He looks up. Hums again. ‘Right in front of us.’

As pleasant as his voice is, as easy-going as the dude is, he’s been with them through a lot of shit and the appearance of a stranger in front of their group is nothing less than a deliberate act given how they’ve removed themselves from the rest. Deliberate acts tend to end poorly for the Nein and Caduceus’s fingers twitch toward Caleb and the dot of amber hanging around his neck, staff and weapons stored protectively within it.

Beau steps in front of him, in front of all of them, as the Taskhand steps out from the line of the crowd and into the empty space between.

She looks him over as she has been trained: tall, as Caduceus had said; a dark elf with platinum hair bound into several braids, the style and ornaments not dissimilar from how Den Myteri decorate their warriors; armoured but no visible weapons, as the invitations had demanded. As she finishes her perusal, a final thought shoves to the fore of her mind. Familiar, it screams at her, and her eyes feel like they’re about to pop, her head aches with the squeeze of pressure as too many selves try to squash into her skull.

‘Rhurin,’ she greets him smoothly, and the Taskhand stops a few paces back, hands folded behind his back as he bows.

‘Lhuthurin, actually. Rhurin was my father,’ he says, and when he smiles, Beau sees it.

Rhurin never smiled.

‘Sorry. You looked—‘

‘Please, don’t apologise, I’m well aware—the similarity is striking. My own father calls me his shadow,’ Lhuthurin laughs. ‘He is here, if you would like to speak with him.’

‘Ah.’ Beau can feel the weight of the Nein’s eyes on her. ‘No, thank you. Maybe another time.’

Lhuthurin nods. ‘As you please,’ he says, pleasantly enough. If he feels the watchful eyes on him, he gives no sign of it. If anything, he seems to relax further, unfolding his arms loose at his sides, sweeping one hand up through long hair with that guileless smile. ‘My congratulations on your consecution, Lady Beauregard—‘

‘Beau. Just - it’s just Beau.’

The eyes on her grow sharper. Perhaps, after this, she should finally tell them about the whole Captaincy...and wife...and Consort thing. And her apparent title? Later.

Lhuthurin nods slowly. ‘Very well. You honour me. You may call me Rin.’ He extends a hand. Beau takes it. Feels the callouses and scars of a hand not so dissimilar to her own. A firm grip, dry palms. ‘As wonderfully and deeply uncomfortable as it is to be stared at by your companions,’ Rin continues, and he grins when Beau barks a laugh, ‘I didn’t come to make small talk. Even at parties, I am the Queen’s to command. She has asked for me to...’ Rin hesitates.

Beau pulls her hand out of his. Narrows her eyes—not at him but over his shoulder, toward the maelstrom of activity that follows the Queen wherever she treds. Courtiers and petitioners and pesky trouble-makers. Guards and advisors wanting to bend her ear even at a ball.

‘Collect me?’ Beau asks, finishes for Rin.

‘Those are not the words I would use, Hi— Beau.’

Her gaze slides back to him. The weight of a half-dozen lives narrows in on him. ‘Then what would you use?’

He swallows. ‘Request. Your presence.’

‘So she wants to summon me to her side like a dog.’

‘Beau,’ Jester says. Sets a hand on her shoulder.

It’s a peculiar sensation to feel everything in her settle into its right place again. To have her skin fit her frame, and everything within it.

Beau blinks. Shakes her head. ‘Uh. Yeah. Yes. Sure, I’ll go with you,’ she says to Lhuthurin, and when Jester squeezes her shoulder, eyes dark with worry, she gives her friend a nod. ‘I’m okay.’

‘Are you sure? You went all...’

‘One of my lives was apparently super prideful,’ Beau mutters and it makes Jester snort. ‘They don’t like being told what to do.’

‘You’ve never liked that. But you are clever and strong and you’re real. You’re the real one,’ Jester tells her very very quietly and quickly, leaning in to adjust the collar and lapel of Beau’s suit. She grips Beau’s wrist, hold firm, and meets her eyes directly. ‘You are the real one.’

‘I’m the real one.’

‘You’ve got this.’

‘I’ve got this.’

Jester smiles then and turns her around to Lhuthurin, still waiting. Though less comfortably now, with Fjord and Caleb and Yasha gathered around him making entirely pleasant conversation with entirely off-putting and direct eye contact that doesn’t shift, nor blink.

‘Rin. You wanna stay there, or?’

‘I’ll come with you.’ He leaps on the offer, jumping out of the circle to walk with Beau. ‘Thank you,’ he says when they’re a short way into the crowd. ‘Your companions are... Are they always so...’

‘That was us being nice. Polite, even.’

Lhuthurin shivers.

The crowd parts easily around them, most of the guests very interested indeed in the human and the Taskhand. Word had spread, Beau knew, about her and her consecution. But it was one thing to know that people knew and quite another to walk through walls of staring figures. Jester’s reassurances, the firm pressure of her hand that snapped Beau back to herself, begins to lose its weight as another self tries to assert itself; this Beau is calm and collected and always rightfully in control. This Beau matches the Taskhand’s military precision, this Beau folds her hands behind her back and wears her silver hair in the single braid of—no. That’s not right.

‘Steady,’ Rin murmurs.

Beau drags in a breath. Allows her eyes to dip to hands instead of faces—cups and little pastry purses and handkerchiefs and coins and flowers, empty gesturing hands and hands entangled. No one armed, apparently.

‘Almost there,’ he says.

‘Are you consecuted?’

There’s a beat before he answers in which Beau remembers it’s not exactly a polite question.

‘Yes.’

‘Happy about that?’

‘Most of the time. Are you?’

Beau can see her up ahead, where the crowd is gathered close. The sweep of her crown stands a small distance above the rest of the heads so she’s easy to pick.

‘I don’t know,’ Beau tells him, stopping where they are. Rin tilts his head invitingly. ‘No,’ she adds. ‘I don’t like it.’

Rin doesn’t seem scandalised by the comment. She thought he might not be. Myteri is many things but stuffy and proper isn’t typically how it is described. And even then, Rhurin—whole always solid—had never been buried in the formalities and traditions of his den. To find a like mind in his son is nice, but not surprising.

‘Do you want me to push a path right through to her?’ he offers.

‘Would you?’

‘It would be an honour and a pleasure. I’ve been eagerly waiting a chance to shove some of these scorpions.’

Beau laughs, and finds that the crowd parts when they turn to see her. ‘I don’t think you’ll need to. Sorry.’

Rin shrugs. ‘Probably for the best.’

#i didnt get to the dancjng yet im sorry #consecuted au

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utilitycaster · 4 years

Text

DMing stuff: know your own rules

so this is something that I’m going to have to experience in practice but I think it’s important and I also think it’s a thing we don’t talk about a lot.

I have made it pretty clear before that I think showing up to a table having watched actual play and bought a bunch of dice is not particularly respectful. I don’t think it’s intended to be disrespectful, but also: this is a game, and you should at least skim the rules in the PHB that apply to you. I don’t expect new players (or even experienced players!) to know everything; I do appreciate that people learn by doing and not everyone loves mechanics the way I do; but also I am of the belief that when you show up for something you planned to do, in life in general, you show up having done some amount of thoughtful preparation.

If you’re DM-ing having been a player, there are probably things others have done that you didn’t like, or things your DM (or an actual play DM) did that you did like, and you can incorporate some soft rules of your own to cover them. Lack of preparedness is one, and I think that’s an expectation you can set in session zero (in a nice way); here a few others that I plan on having as ‘rules’.

Players shouldn’t ask for a specific kind of check off the bat. If a player does this, as a DM, there are various strategies to address it, but I’m of the opinion that you can just say “that’s not the appropriate kind of check” or alternately prompting the check before the player can. To give an example, if the party walks into a room with interesting markings all over the walls, and it’s sufficiently lit for anyone to be able to see them, you can prompt them by saying “Mr. Wizard, Be-bop the Bard, and Sister Mary Moradin, please roll arcana checks” (note - this does require you as the DM to have an idea of who’s got arcana proficiency although you can also just go with ‘primary casters’ in this case or you can say “anyone with arcana proficiency, you can roll to see if you understand these markings”). If Sir Paul of Adaen says “can I roll a history check” and these are just straight up arcane markings and he has no training in that, you can say “nope” - although if this is a room of a famous arcanist, then sure - he may not know what the markings mean from that history check, but he might know that this is the study of Saruman the Chartreuse, a great illusionist.

Basically, you do need to give your players the means to succeed but also they can’t just use their primary skill for everything. You can also just set a super high DC if appropriate; see: Fjord trying to intimidate various hostile terrains. If there is one obscure book in all the world called “A Treatise on the Markings found in Saruman the Chartreuse’s Study Walls” then sure if Sir Paul rolls a nat 20 history check with his +4 to history, then yeah. But he can’t roll a nature check because that makes no fucking sense, and Barb the Big who learned to read last week would not get to roll a history check because even with a nat 20 there’s just no way she would have encountered that book in her past.

Related - make sure the help action makes sense. Like, I don’t think helping with insight checks (for example) always would make sense in context. A lot of DMs in actual play have agreed; sometimes you can do it (wordless communication between party members, or alternately one party member saying something to catch the NPC off guard and the other doing the insight check) but sometimes this isn’t something you can really help with. I’m also of the opinion that you can’t really help someone with death saves (or at least not with the help action). You can make a medicine check to stabilize them, you can obviously heal them or cast Spare the Dying, and your typical Bless/Aura of Protection/Inspiration/Beacon of Hope will help, but you cannot give them advantage on the throw.

Take 10 and take 20 are good ideas even if you’re playing 5e. For those who don’t know, these are from Pathfinder (and possibly from 3.5e) and the idea is if you’re not under a time crunch and failure won’t get you hurt or killed, you can take your time. So for example: if they’re running from a vampire when they enter Saruman’s room, then Mr. Wizard rolls arcana to see if he knows what the markings mean on the fly. If on the other hand they’re casually strolling through this chill dungeon, he can take 10 and check his books and essentially make a passive arcana check and get a good sense of what’s happening, and if they take out some charcoal and make a rubbing of a crucial symbol and he then spends that evening back at the university library studying it and cross-referencing, he can blow this case wide open - but he spent the evening on it and the enemy may have gone to the room in the meantime. It makes sense! You trade a guarantee of a certain degree of success for time, much like in life. Also I’m okay with someone trying a roll, and if they don’t do well, taking 10 or 20 as appropriate (but you don’t get multiple rolls - you get once chance to do super well by chance, and then you pay the time penalty).

Grant advantage for good RP, and occasionally disadvantage if they hit a nerve for the NPC. Pretty common; if someone does a genuinely good job in their speech, that should be rewarded! If someone says something likely to upset that NPC, give them disadvantage! Be thoughtful about this, and if someone tends to rub NPCs the wrong way and they’re not playing someone with low charisma, you can start prompting them for insight checks or working on your own descriptions since you might be giving the player incorrect impressions. A Crown of Candy has handled this really well, as a highly political game.

#my dm guide #d&d #dungeons & dragons #other class-based names are:#Drew the Druid #Sir Jackson (get it it's surge action)#Kiki Points #Dale of Thorns #Stabs McDaggers #Lady Metta the Mage #and Max of Many Faces

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critfailthatcharismacheck · 4 years

Text

So about our Hot Boi Essek...

Hoo buddy, that revelation was a doozy. Like in retrospect it’s not that surprising but it was still wild. It’s shitty, absolutely shitty what he did, not even in terms of the M9. How could he not anticipate that the theft of the Luxons would spark that kind of reaction? He said he didn’t intend to start a war, but war had already been brewing for decades by that time and something that big seems like the perfect proverbial straw to break the camel’s back. Now that being said, I still really fucking like him. Like damn Matt, you create such amazing characters that I can’t help but love even when they’re absolute bastards! Essek is such an interesting character, and I love all the nuance in his actions and the situation he’s brought on himself. And Matt plays him so cool and charismatic, even when he’s confessing to fucking up big time, he’s so likable! It’s almost infuriating!

But i want to get into this in terms of the M9. So first and probably biggest, Caleb took this very interestingly. I absolutely felt the disappointment radiating off of him after finding out about Essek. Liam has said in Talks that Essek was one of the few, if not the only person that Caleb considered a friend outside of the M9, and it was low key heartbreaking watching his reaction. But I also think that that’s what made his speech to Essek in the Balleater that much more impactful. Like we all saw the similarities between the two, but Caleb really put it into words. I think the conversation would’ve gone a lot differently had Caleb not experienced the growth he did with the M9. He probably would’ve said to just kill Essek or something, but his time with the Nein helped him to see that friendship and redemption are possible and worth the effort. And I absolutely adored how he took Molly’s words to heart and used this moment to impart those words of wisdom on someone who obviously needed them.

I was also interested in how Nott/Veth took the news. I don’t recall if Sam ever said anything about if she ever really trusted Essek that much, but I think the fact that Essek helped her and Caleb complete the Halas spell played a huge role in how things played out. She was surprisingly much more chill than I expected. I would have thought that she would be pissed not only for herself but also for Caleb, but she was surprisingly receptive of him. Well, maybe I shouldn’t be so surprised, I mean she did offer to keep the war going in exchange for Isharnai breaking her curse, which is nearly as selfish as Essek causing a war for science. But I do think that because he helped her with the spell, she was much more lenient than she would have been otherwise. AND ALSO HOLY SHIT JUST FUCKING PARALYZED THIS DUDE IN THE MIDDLE OF A PARTY WHAT HAPPENED TO JUST TALKING TO HIM???

So I think the only other person that played much on a role in this whole thing was Jester, and I’m more about how she was just trying to chat Essek up when all hell broke loose and Veth paralyzed him without telling anyone??? That was wild, Jester was panicking, like holy shit did I do this on accident? Aside from that, her reaction was totally on par with how I thought it would be. Very confused and kind of hurt but also just wanting answers, and once she got them she was fine. It’s a little stressful, but once you’re friends with Jester she’s ride or die. As soon as she heard the full story she was in support mode, making sure that Essek didn’t feel alone in this. And that is classic Jester.

I don’t have much to say about Beau, Fjord, and Caduceus during the main conversation with Essek because they either weren’t there or didn’t speak, but after he left Beau and Caddy had some very hot takes. I for one am all about people getting what’s coming to them, so I’m absolutely on the same page as Beau, but in this case I do think Cad and Caleb are right saying that it can’t be anytime soon. The balance is so delicate right now, and trying to get revenge/removing corruption so soon after the truce has been made will absolutely probably lead to the war starting again. It will have to come months, even years after these negotiations. The wound is too fresh, and both sides will be looking for any excuse to break the peace.

I have no doubt that right now Essek is near the top of the list of people that need to recompense for their crimes, but I think in the long run the M9 aren’t going to be too harsh on him. It helps that he entirely laid out his involvement, that he was at least assumingely truthful, and that he is working toward fixing his mistakes. The three Cerberus Assembly members, Ludinus, Ickythong, and Vess DeRogna, are absolutely at the top of the list, not sure which order at this point, but they’ll hopefully get what’s coming to them eventually.

#critical role #the mighty nein #essek thelyss #caleb widogast #nott the brave #veth brenatto #veth the brave #jester lavorre #beauregard lionett #cr fjord #caduceus clay #matt mercer #liam o'brien #sam reigel

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okimargarvez · 4 years

Text

SUBMISSION - 1

Original title: Submission.

Prompt: alternative for S12, Luke wants the tech girl and he gets her.

Warning: really smut; Luke OOC.

Genre: angst, romantic, erotic.

Characters: Penelope Garcia, Luke Alvez, Roxy, BAU team.

Pairings: Garvez.

Note: long (6 chapters).

Song mentioned: none.

Legend: 👨‍❤️‍👨 💏 😈👻.

Submission masterlist

Note: I don't know who would like to read this kind of story. It will not be only about sex; I can't imagine a world where Pen and Luke aren't in love. It will not be just a story about female submission and male domination despite the title. It's deeper and more complicated. If you need to blame someone, or better, something, it was the fault of the movies inspired by Psycho. One of my last exams was about this topic (with a lot of sexual content 🙄) and I had to put a bit of that somewhere. Please, be kind and tell me if you want to be tagged.

GARVEZ STORIES

Chapter 1 - Inappropriate

Certainly she doesn't imagine seeing him appear there, in that bar that she attends from many years. It is one of her safe areas, a place where she feels she can be herself, she can forget for a moment that she is a federal. He is alone, no attractive brunette with a model physique beside him. He has changed his clothes, he wears no more the black suit, but lighter jeans and a blue jacket. She hopes still not noticed.

Hope destined to die soon. -Hola, chica.- she feels the shadow of the man at her shoulders, the light covers her. The male tone, strongly sarcastic, makes her stretch all the muscles. He is too pleased. She turns slowly.

-You didn't have to relax with your girlfriend...- she pretends to not remember that name. -Roxy?- she looks at him without the shadow of a smile, puts her arms folded and waits his reply.

-And you weren't supposed to hang out with your Canadian boyfriend? Where is he, in the bathroom?- the woman rolls her eyes, raising them to the sky. Here we go again, same as a few hours ago, same speech and same irony. His goal is clearly to annoy her.

-No! He's not in the bathroom, and he's not Canadian. Why do you insist about this?- she snorts, turning around and turning her back on him again. She too has changed her clothes: he cannot avoid observing the dark suit, a part of her back left uncovered on which a cascade of blonde hair falls, no longer wavy, but straight.

-I don't know.- he shrugs, standing next to her chair. -You are so blonde and there, your skin is so pale...- his tone is no longer amused, instead it is hoarse, low, guttural. Even if she wants to remain impassive, she swallows. -Swedish, right?- here, he returns to the attack.

-No. My family has Norwegian origins, if you really care- she decides to focus on her cocktail, but suddenly the thought that he can watch her while she drinks, makes her blush. Damn! The man doesn't seem to have realized, because now his eyes are too busy getting lost in the neckline, very generous; too generous.

-Mhm.- he nods, not very attentive to her words. -They are the ones who have invented the sauna?- he finally shoots out, just to continue that conversation. She tries to notbget irritated; the newcomer just wants to be nice, he wants to know better all his colleagues...

-No, those are the Swedish.- she corrects him, feeling a little like Reid. -Norway is famous for the fjords, the north pole and...- she realizes she has almost smiled at him. -But why am I telling you this stuff?- she severely interrupts eye contact and makes another attempt with the glass resting in front of her.

The man laughs. -Is this place free?- he asks placing a hand on the back of her chair and the other on the one next to her. The blonde doesn't answer, taking a sip of her drink. The evening promises to be very long. He admires in an almost obsessive way a droplet that lingers on the red lips and then comes down from the chin until it ends up in that inlet. Sooo long, he corrects himself.

-What if it isn't?- she challenges him openly, deciding she can't allow this almost stranger to upset her at this point. Just because he took Derek's place… she doesn't have to think about her chocolate thunder. He is now with his wife and his son. He's happy, that's the only thing that matters. Or not? He seems to appreciate her choice, he still smiles and shit, he is exaggeratedly beautiful when he does, but even when he's serious. She can't flirt with another special agent, it would be like betraying Morgan. And then it's not the same thing, it's not enough to look... like this, for turn on the magic.

-Be honest, Garcia.- being called by him annoys her, like any other thing he does. -Your boyfriend, Canadian or not, doesn't exist. Am I right?- he doesn't seem to want to make fun of her, but now she has activated the protection program and has no intention of unlocking it.

She doesn't look at him. -Do you think it's any of your business?- he moves away her glass, almost empty and intercepts her hand.

-They could be.- he smiles, this time in a satisfied, provocative way, but then he changes expression. He looks almost sweet, the curves of his face softer and eyes with a strange light, but it can't be.

-No, there is no boyfriend anymore.- she admits, feeling defeated. She could have keep to play the cold or say nothing, but she is not like that; one thing is pretending and acting rude for those three minutes of calling, one minute to discuss cases or five (even!) on the elevator. But now they are alone, in a club and he seems to be flirting... even if it's not possible. She lows her head, bending her neck down. She doesn't miss Sam at all, she didn't love him anymore when they decided to break up. She misses having a man next to her, to find someone when she slips under the covers. To receive calls that don't start with "Garcia, could you look for the address of...".

He notices the change. He recognizes all the signs, sadness and bitterness. -Why did you lie?- he asks in a low voice, as if he doesn't want to be heard by others, placing his amber hand on the white of the woman, who strangely doesn't reject him. Maybe it's because she completely surrendered to this situation that she is unable to handle, although she has pretended otherwise.

Before answering him, she observes their close fingers for a few seconds, she wonders on the sensations that such contact causes to her. -Because you ask too many questions, Alvez.- the first bullshit that came to her mind.

She stands up, leaving $5 bill on the counter and starts to walk towards the exit. He, who hasn't ordered anything since he set foot on this place, replaces the piece of green paper with another one, extracted from his wallet. With two steps he reaches her just as she is about to leave, in time to open her the door, as a gentleman. But she ignores him and certainly not thank him.

-These are yours.- the money waives in front of her nose, but the woman doesn't seem to want to take it back. She shakes her head, walking in the direction of subway. He doesn't give up, keeping follow her. If he weren't a federal agent, she would probably get anxious. But then she remembers that the only guy who shot her was a highly decorated deputy sheriff and she starts to breathe in a different way. -Hey, wait. I have a car parked nearby. I can give you a ride.- she would never accept. If she did, she would have found herself again in a situation like this night, a moment ago; they would challenge each other and she would lost, because she was not meant for this kind of thing. No, no way.

Penelope hates feeling so vulnerable, despite having told Morgan something different, some time ago, just about her ex, Sam... -Nope, thanks. I will take the subway.- she walks quickly on her high heels and the man remains a step back, only to admire her body almost dancing and the movement of her hips.

-I insist.- his tone is peremptory, he will not accept a refusal. -It is dangerous to go around the city all alone at certain hours. Aren't you afraid?- she bursts out laughing before his face, something which he certainly doesn't expect. They get stuck almost in the middle of the road, it seems that there is no living soul here, apart from them.

-Afraid?- she echoes him. -The only man who shot me was someone who asked me a date. Why should I be afraid? If something has to happen, it will happen.- she turns her back on him, but she doesn't move. He absorbs the newly acquired information, without wondering if it's another lie. Nothing would be done to make him believe a thing like that. -Don't ask me anything.- she anticipates him before he can open his mouth. -Is your car so far?- she lowers his shoulders. In spite of what she has said, she is very scared of this. Even of him. But it may not be the bad thing. She can't imagine him as an unsub, but neither Colby seemed that and instead...

-No, it's less than a block from here.- they walk in silence for a long stretch, before he starts again to talk. -You really were a rocket with that list of sex shop stores...- it wanted to sound like a compliment, but to since he has mentioned just that kind of business triggers her as the first time she had heard his request.

-Well, I'm a rocket in everything I do!- then she really understands that this sentence sounds ambiguous and reminds when Morgan had told her that time something like that and she believed they slept together after arguing with Kevin and drinking far more than a few too many glasses of wine. She blushes. -I mean... it's mine work. I know what I do.- she prays to all the saints that he has not noticed her embarrassment.

-I don't doubt it.- but judging by the m1ischievous smile, not even this time she was luck. -You are a demure person and you don't like to deal with certain topics or you get upset just with me about it?- while he asks the question, they reach the car. Once again he manages to anticipate her to open the door for her. This mix of old-style romance and red light insinuations is driving her crazy. She sits and bucklesvup. He does the same, but doesn't leave. -I noticed the long pause you did after my request...- the woman curses herself again. She lowers her head for the umpteenth time during this evening. -What's the problem?- he doesn't going to quit until he gets an answer.

-Have you ever heard of Agent Morgan? Derek Morgan.- she points out, feeling a pang in the heart. -He was the one which you took the place.- a flash seems illuminate his face.

-Was he your ex-boyfriend, were you two together?- for the first time she smiles, but it's a bitter smile.

-No, he's my best friend. They shot his wife while she was pregnant...bAfter the baby born, he decided he could no longer endanger his family.- but why is she telling him? She has just known him for few days. She shouldn't even be in the car with him.

-Understandable.- he lifts her chin and she discovers she doesn't have the strength to fight. -But there is more. I read it in your eyes. I don't need to be a profiler forvguess that for you he wasn't just a friend.- he lets her go. -I'm sorry, I know what it means losing someone you loved... but I haven't joined the team for replace your Morgan.- he smiles, sadly. -I'm here to catch the fugitives criminals, like Cullen.- pronouncing that name hurts. The sense of guilt intensifies. She doesn't realize it.

-I know. Now could you accompany me home? Tomorrow we must be ready for everything. The unsubs never rest.- he nods and starts the engine.

When they arrive in front of the apartment building where she lives, Penelope certainly doesn't expect that he comes down in turn to accompany her. Her are worthless protests, is useless that she repeats that she can now get by on her own. But it's all too weird. When he joins her, she waits for him to pull out his weapon and shooting, but it doesn't happen.

She turns to him, who is a few inches behind. -Thanks, Alvez. See you tomorrow. Good night.- her heart stops when she sees the flicker in the so dark eyes of the man and he comes closer, gets closer and closer, up to place his hand on the wall with all the interphones, on which the woman has leaned unknowingly. He is really too close.

-You're welcome.- he whispers and his words are lost in the night. He leans toward her. He wants to kiss her and he will do it, he doesn't care that he knows very little. He is attracted by her like the light of a chandelier attracts a moth (with the same fatal result, probably), he has to have her. He will. He sees her pupils getting more and more large, dilated. Clear sign of excitement. Because she wants him too. He doesn't prolong the agony, bends a little more and makes crash his own lips on her fleshy ones; he doesn't ask for permission but sneaks his tongue into her mouth and immediately they begin to weave wild dances. She moans inside his throat, fortunately, since they are almost outdoors and they risk waking up the whole neighborhood.

-This attitude is truly...- the woman manages to say breathlessly -...inappropriate.- before he catches her again, smearing his body on the soft shapes of his colleague. Something quite soft attracts instead her attention. She realizes that she is terribly attracted to this man almost unknown, of not being able to stop herse or him and that she likes the whole situation. I would like a man who could make decisions, make choices... in short, that did not always make me feel the one who makes choices. It is stressful. With years of delay, her wish had been fulfilled.

They don't known how they manage to open the door and get into the elevator. Here he drops the straps of her dress, getting a better view of her breast. -We shouldn't do it... it's against...- she barely holds back a scream when the man takes one of the nipples between his fingers. -...the protocol.- she concludes with a sigh. A sound warns them that they have arrived at the requested floor. He settles her just for safety and quickly pushes her towards her apartment, even if he hasn't already been there.

While she turns the key in the lock she can't pretend not to feel something solidly brush her legs. She can still prevent that from happening, she just has to avoid kissing him again. How much he must have drunk to want someone like her? Yet he doesn't seem drunk. On the contrary, he looks as clear as a bell. Almost… ruthless.

-Strip for me, Penelope.- is the first time he calls her by name, one thing to which she is not accustomed in general, and that is Luke doing this upsets her even more. His tone is low but firm, peremptory. So... authoritarian. Exciting. But still a part of her wants to rebel. After all, this is her home, she should command him. This guy may be nice to see, but he's the newest, he has taken Derek's place, he has... her thoughts are abruptly interrupted by a rip, precisely that of the fabric of her dress. She lowers her eyes to check the extent of the damage, then she raises them back to him, looking for some guilt. She doesn't find the slightest trace of it. -These are the consequences when you don't obey.- he clarifies, while with his hands he is widening the gash so much that now the dress covers only the lower half of her body. It was a beautiful dress, bought with JJ and Emily the time they went to London to visit the latter when she was working for INTERPOL. £ 150. But above, all it was a memory of happy moment. And he destroyed it in less than a second. She should hate him for it. Why can't she do it? Why instead her legs are trembling and she is feeling something vibrating in depth that she thought were lost forever? -I am waiting.- he reiterates, arms folded, in the position of the observer, the voyeur.

Looking into those really too dark (almost obscure) eyes she also loses this battle. She lets the dress fall to the ground, remaining in underwear and with heels. She would like to have something to cover herself with, she doesn't feel like a prostitute or a porn star, just a simple idiot. Embarrassment makes her blush. If she had a different kind of physique, maybe she wouldn't be so upset. She waits to hear a wicked laughter at any moment, any testimony of the disgusting that he feels when he sees her almost naked. But is not so. He gestures for her to continue and she reluctantly performs, but he stops her before she can also remove her shoes. -No, you can keep them on. I like how they slim your figure.- and yet he doesn't seem to be lying. He really seems to appreciate what he sees. He takes her by the hand and makes her turn around. Naturally, he is still fully clothed. -You feel beautiful, Penelope?- just like she didn't expect to see him appear at the O'Keefe, or that he accompanied her up to here, she certainly didn't imagine he can ask such a question. She keeps silent, she can't answer him. It would be worse than this sort of striptease. It would be truly naked before his eyes. Like she would prostitute her own soul.

He takes her by her chin, almost hurting her. She understands that he will not stop it until she will respond. -No.- she admits, tightening the eyelids. -I don't feel beautiful at all. Can you leave me, now?- he increases his hold and forces the woman's mouth to collimate with his own. At the same time he spreads her body between his own and a wall, to make her feel his concrete excitement. -This is not fake, babe.- the woman moans. -And now, take off my clothes, but started from the bottom.- he pushes her head to make her get down on her knees. By now she is no longer able to rebel, now she has to find out what it's like to have him inside her (what is the need to do false moralism when it is so obvious?). She starts from shoes, skillfully work with her hands on the strings, then pull down his trousers, but when she raises her head without thinking, she is abruptly brought back to the ground. -You will watch when I tell you.- a bandage or a handkerchief appears in his hands and with it he deprives her of the sense of sight. He makes her rise; she almost laugh to the thought of being covered only in that area. She finds the jacket groping, then the zipper and she slides it slowly down. She can't help but place her hands on his chest, sensing the shapes of his muscles. Then she starts again, opening every button and finally freeing the underlying skin. She would like to lean her head and feeling tight squeezed from those strong and powerful arms, like in the movies. She will always be a perenneer dreamer, despite all the disillusions that life slams in her face.

Yet he seems to read her mind. He hugs her for a few minutes. She should feel cold, she has not turned on the heat, but that thought doesn't brush her minimally. Her heart begins to pump more blood, her head is spinning. Then he whispers to her something that seems to have nothing to do with the context. -You're safe, baby.- and she believes him. Then he loosens the grip, making her again bend down. Except for the socks, even he is almost naked now. Just his boxers separate their bodies. She swallows. He pushes her head against his lower abdomen. -Do you consider yourself a good girl, Penelope?- his questions embarrass her more than what he forces her to do. She knows exactly what he wants now from her. He takes her hands and guides her in the right direction. He helps her lift the fabric. Then he caresses her cheeks, lips and opens her mouth. -Choose to answer me or to show me.- he adds only. The decision is just too easy.

It is more than inappropriate, this is a totally wrong, incorrect and rash action; she is not at all a good girl. She never thought she can become one of those women who lend themselves to such things. Yet it is not was she asked? She wanted a self-confident man; here he is and he is algo good to see. She tries to shut down her brain, to just act, to don't think, returning to her "animal", natural or "primitive" state. His flavor is strange, but pleasant. Her knees hurt; he urges her to continue, giving her light pushes on the nape. Those fingers in her hair for absurd excite her more than what she is doing. She feels the rhythm increase, she understands that he is close and if there is a taboo that she has never broken, it is just that. But in the moment she welcomed him inside her, she knew she couldn't anymore rebel. The man holds her head steady as he empties himself in her oral cavity. And he keeps her until she swallows.

The shame and the sense of vomiting are now as one, but she expects that at least now it's time for the funny part, the more "normal" moment. She hasn't endured all of this for nothing. Instead the man rearranges himself, she senses it by the noises she hears (the belt, the zipper teeth, the jeans cloth) and then he takes off the bandage. -I'm sorry for your dress.- but he's not really sorry, it's a catchphrase. -Maybe next time you'll do better.- he pats her on the cheek, as she would be a child, then grabs her to give her one last kiss, savoring his own taste. Then he leaves her there, in the middle of the room, naked, except for shoes.

Naked both inside and outside.

#Garvez #criminal minds #cm #penelope garcia #luke alvez #bau team #penelope x luke #luke x penelope #garcia x alvez #alvez x garcia #luke ooc #smut

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nejitensstuff · 4 years

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Hello everyone and welcome !

If you are here, I guess that's because, like me, you find that the parents of Elsa and Anna, Agnarr and Iduna, are very interesting characters who deserve to be more developed. If you've ever seen Frozen II, you know they're more present in this than in the first one. However, and although I was delighted to know a little bit more about their story, I found that they would have a lot of potential and I hope that wholeheartedly they will be even more present in the third movie, if Disney ever makes us a gift of another one.

For those who have not seen the movie, I really recommend it. I loved the first without worshiping it, the story was interesting and the songs were very good. But Frozen II is really a crush, I'm not an animated film lover in general, but the story is captivating, the characters are endearing, deep, the design is absolutely incredible, the songs are beautiful.

I preferred that one to the first one, but this remains my personal opinion. However, I was slightly ... frustrated that the parents' story was not completely addressed. Also, I wrote this little story about them. I write very often, but I never show what I write, I keep my stories for myself and I read them when I wish. But I thought maybe you were just as frustrated as me, so I decided to post my story here to share with everyone who wants to read it.

I warn you that I am French, so English is not my first language and it is very probable that I made mistakes. Do not blame me. You can and I encourage you to write a review, just to say what you think of my story or to give me advice.

One last thing, I do not know if this story will have a sequel or not, I write for pleasure only.

The characters do not belong to me, just like the songs, I'm just taking over the story that has already been created.

Thank you so much. Have a good read if I have not lost you with my speech already.

Agduna Fanfiction

Chapter 1 :

Heavy flakes of snow were falling from the sky, covering the kingdom of Arendelle with a thick white coat. Few children were playing cheerfully in the snow under the watchful eyes of their mothers, who were carefully embroidering blankets while their fathers were cutting wood for the chemneys. The kingdom of Arendelle was known for its particularly cold and harsh winters, but the happiness felt by every citizen warmed the Fjord with comforting warmth. Children's laughs were rising in the air, houses were lit by the fires that could be seen crackling softly through the windows. King Agnarr, straddling his faithful steed, accompanied by the chief of his personal guard, gave a benevolent look at his subjects, who cheered him heartily. The kingdom was relatively small, the inhabitants were very close together and the king, very close to the people who had an unchanging respect and love for him.

But at the end of this winter day, the king needed to be alone. He turned slightly to the head of his guard, a tall brown-haired man with brown eyes who looked suspiciously all around him.

_ Thanks Knut, I will continue the road alone from now on.

Captain Knut tensed, suspicious. The safety of the king was his first concern. His parents were dead, he had no brother, no sister even less an uncle or an aunt, he was the last member of the royal family. If ever something happened to him, another dynasty would have ascend the throne, agitation and trouble would take over the kingdom fur sure.

_ Are you sure this is a good idea, Your Majesty ?

The king gave him a reassuring look, and without an answer, he left the group on a small path that climbed to the forest. He felt the captain's look on him, begging for a turn, but he did not do anything about it. His horse took a good walk on a small path lined with trees covered with snow. He was ecstatic for a moment in front of the beauty of the place. When he moved away from the castle, he often realized how heavy the burden of power could be, he sometimes forgot to enjoy life as he should. The death of his parents followed by his accession to the throne when he was only thirteen had quickly made him mature. After a few years in power, he had hardened, he had learned to manage and administer his kingdom, concluding important commercial markets. His old preceptors praised the little boy they had raised to be a monarch.

However, there was still a problem, he had just turned twenty-two, and the name of no fiancée had come out of the long meetings that had often taken place at the castle to decide which woman would be fit to be queen. His advisers continually assured him that it was essential that he had an heir, in order to sustain his dynasty and bring some stability to his power. Of course, a happy man in his marriage, having beautiful children capable of carrying the burden of power, was a more respected monarch, which was essential, especially because of his age. Youth rarely show wisdom. It was what all the inhabitants of the kingdom of Arendelle had whispered on the day of his coronation, but to their greatest surprise, Agnarr had acted like a great king. After all, he had been roughed by his father, strict and cold, who did not particularly like him. He had trained a thousand times in the exercise of power at his side and although he had some difficulties at first, he quickly understood what a king's duty was. After all, he had it in his blood.

As he walked, a calm and gentle voice brought him out of his thoughts.

Where the north wind meets the sea

There's a river full of memory

Sleep, my darling, safe and sound

For in this river all is found

Intrigued and fascinated by the beautiful voice that sang softly. He got off his horse, tied it to a tree and walked silently towards the origin of the voice. With a gesture of his hand, he cleared a few branches of trees that hindered his passage and came out on a small clearing, surrounded by the woods. He stopped short, a young woman sitting back to him at the edge of a partly frozen river. Without noticing the newcomer, the young woman began to sing again, in the same enchanting voice that could have charmed the coldest of hearts.

In her waters, deep and true

Lie the answers and a path for you

Dive down deep into her sound

But not too far or you'll be drowned

Yes, she will sing to those who'll hear

And in her song, all magic flows

But can you brave what you most fear?

Can you face what the river knows?

Agnarr leaned against the trunk of a tree and continued to listen to the young woman who did not know she had an audience. The king closed his eyes, bewitched by the sweetness of that voice.

Where the north wind meets the sea

There's a mother full of memory

Come, my darling, homeward bound

When all is lost, then all is found

When the song stopped, calm returned to the clearing, Agnarr opened his eyes to fall on the young woman, still sitting back to him, who had not moved. Silently, he approached her and whispered in a voice as soft as possible, so as not to scare her.

_ It was beautiful, Iduna.

The young woman turned with a start. He observed the beautiful face he knew by heart. He missed her.

She glared at the king when she recognized him.

_ Your Majesty, she said, standing up.

_ Since when do you call me by my title?

_ Since you prefer the company of Miss Claire, perhaps.

His voice was cold, emotionless. Iduna and Agnarr knew each other well, they had spent all their childhood together, they were the best-friends of the world. But time had finally separated them. Agnarr had been forced to devote himself to his job and Iduna had had to give up their exclusive relationship. They had continued to see each other, but less often than before, Iduna had met other young people, and she had met Jörg, a boy of her age. He was very kind and Iduna was badly in need of a shoulder to rely on now that Agnarr was no longer there for that. She had spoken of her companion to the king who had congratulated her and had broken the contact just after, withour any reason. Iduna had learned a few days later that he had met Mademoiselle Claire, a young French aristocrat with a rather sulphurous reputation, with whom he immediately befriend. She was now staying at the castle, with Agnarr, and many whispered that she would soon be the queen.

The two young people had ended their relationship. Which unconsciously made them both suffer terribly.

_ I did not try to avoid you, said the king, I have less time to devote to my personal life, that's all. Claire has nothing to do with all this.

He detailed for a moment the frail young woman. She had not changed, she was still so beautiful, so bright. He scowled.

_ In that case, good afternoon, Your Majesty, she said moving away.

He caught her quickly, surprised.

_ But Iduna ! It's been weeks since we've seen each other and you're leaving like this?

The young brunette looked at him.

_ I have nothing more to say, Majesty.

_ Stop with this title !

Anger was slowly but surely rising at Agnarr's. He was a man with a fiery nature, he could get angry quickly enough and had a hard time getting calm. Only Iduna had the power to appease his fiery temperament. The young woman was far from aggressive or rebellious, she was calm, almost introverted, she hated conflict that she fled at all costs. But today, she was really and deeply upset by her friend. Her best closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.

_ What have I done for you to behave in this way?

The young woman let out a sarcastic laugh, but her eyes glittered with sadness.

_ What did you do ?

The king did not answer. He waited, his hands outstretched towards her in a silent supplication. The young woman ignored him, indifferent, like he did with her for several weeks. What did he hope? That she throws herself into his arms? She sighed wearily and turned to him a cold look.

_ It does not matter anymore.

He frowned , feeling the problems coming. What did she mean?

_ Jörg is going to leave Arendelle ...

Agnarr suppressed a satisfied smile. Jörg had been Iduna's companion for over two months, he was cutting ice to sell to other countries. Agnarr did not appreciate this man. He had never met him yet. But when Iduna had talked to him about her beautiful ice cutter, he immediately hated him.

Seeing his smile delighted, Iduna dropped her bomb.

_ And he wishes me to leave with him.

The king tensed, his fists clenched, a veil of fury darkened his beautiful green eyes.

_ That's out of the question," he barked.

Iduna tensed in her turn, irritated by the reaction of her sovereign.

_ I do not think I asked for your agreement ...

_ And you do not have it ! he said between his clenched teeth.

Images of Iduna leaving Arendelle on a boat, hanging on Jörg's arm, invaded his mind. He saw red. It was his Iduna. She was his.

_ You do not have the right ! She said with affront.

_ Sorry ? He said in a dangerously calm tone.

Iduna faced him, not at all impressed by the king's fury. Even if she did not confess it to the king, Iduna did not really want to leave either, Jörg had made this proposal a few days ago and she still hadn't made her decision.

_ You have no right ! she continued. First you ignore me for almost two months without any reason, and then you prevent me from living my life. What do you want from me ? You may be the king but you have no right to stop me from living my own life !

The king stayed silent. Only few people had spoken to him that way. Maybe that was one of the reasons he loved the young woman so much. He took a deep breath, trying to calm the rage that was rising dangerously inside him. At that moment, he could have killed Jörg. He had always been jealous of the relationship between Iduna and Agnarr. Little by little, without her realizing it, he had pushed her away from the king and now he even wished to take her away from the kingdom.

_ He manipulates you ... he finally let go after an unsustainable silence.

Iduna stood up, stiff as justice.

_ I do not allow you to talk about my companion like that.

Insensitive to his words, Agnarr continued.

_ He is jealous of our relationship. He wants to take you away from me.

The young woman choked with indignation.

_ I could say the same thing about your dear Mademoiselle Claire.

Her blue eyes shone with rage, but Agnarr knew her better than anyone, he saw the point of sadness in his eyes. He frowned. Was she ... jealous?

_ Do not put Claire into that, what do you have against her?

Once again, Iduna let out a small laugh. She plunged her blue eyes into the king's, and spoke with great frankness.

_ No one appreciates your companion, Your Majesty. The whole kingdom is eager for her to leave Arendelle. Her sulphurous reputation doesn't please anyone here, you apart.

Agnarr gasped, shocked. So Claire had already made a name for herself ? He sighed. Claire was charming, but she could be very sticky, sometimes, and very annoying.

_ I don't know what you're talking about, Iduna, but I find it very childish that you behaved this way.

Stretched like a bow, the young woman bows angrily and leaves the clearing without Agarr trying to catch her. As soon as she disappeared behind the trees, the king finally calmed down, he inhaled slowly, thinking about what had happened. Iduna wanted to leave, she wanted to follow this man. At that moment, the desire to kill Jörg was big. Agnarr was not a very violent man by nature, his role as king had taught him diplomacy and exchange, rather than weapons. But Agnarr had also done the army, he had been there as a soldier, he was still training regularly so as not to lose what had been taught to him, and he could sometimes be impulsive when he was upset. And at this moment, he was more than upset. He walked towards his horse, thinking back to their discussion. Why did he care so much about Iduna? It was his best friend, certainly, but there was Claire now and it was normal that as they were growing up, their paths separate. But to see Iduna in this clearing had made him feel like a shock. He was lost. He had never been ecstatic at Claire's beauty. He found her quiet pretty the first time he met her at the castle, but after that, he didn't longer payed attention to her "beauty". While with Iduna, every time he saw her, he could not help but rave about her, she looked so beautiful, so fresh ... He shook his head to chase away his thoughts. He loved Claire. Iduna was his friend. Friends were supposed to support each other. So why did he want her to stay with him at all costs? Tormented, he slowly joined the castle, not knowing how to interpret everything he felt. But in any case, one thing was sure : he did not want her to leave.

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readbythestarlight · 4 years

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e2e90

Here we goooo in 2020!

God I hope we see Essek or at least hear from him this episode. I miss him.

SAM NO Y'ALL WILL GET SUED YOU CANT DO THAT THE MOUSE WILL GET YOU

"Ewok to remember" omg

[[MORE]]

Stealing the beacon is THE worst idea.

Oh my god seriously do not break in

You will lose all the trust you have

Fjord solo spa day xD

"Bob?" "Bob??"

Library dayyyyy again

On the one hand I see Caleb's point about the beacons technically being most significant overall right now, but I wonder about his hesitancy to look at Nott's stuff. Is it procrastination because he's afraid he won't be able to do it at all? Is it more selfish, in that he's more focused on serving his own interests by researching the beacons? Is it selfish in that he fears that once he helps her change back to her true form she'll leave them/him? Or is it really just that he feels the beacons are the most pressing for everyone? I'd love to know.

Taliesin is prepared to teach Laura ALL the tarot and then she rolls a 7

Taliesin: "you have a Moonweaver deck which means they're blank or weird and basically make no goddamn sense so good luck!"

Omg Molly was making his own deck I'm crying

Taliesin just REALLY wants to talk tarot xD

Ah, the Caleb and Nott feelings again

I def think he's worried she'll leave...

Yasha and her cool bone harp heck YEAH time for Yasha and Caduceus to start their band

Y'all have GOT to stop procrastinating and just go. I know we all want to avoid the possible disaster but it's time. Things are getting more and more tense.

Playing Hot Cross Buns lol

Aw, Jester honey

She's so upset someone hug her!!

Yayyyy Darrow!

"Can I buy you like, a corn dog or something?"

I LOVE him

He better not be being shifty in any way lol

Sam is like FFS can we GO and as funny as this is I'm with him

Whispers!

Darrow had better have been genuine

WE'RE BACK WHERE IS HOT BOI

They're not taking this at all seriously but I love them anyway

Pfff poor Fjord getting his clothes illusioned into hideous technicolor bath robes

Back to the Xhorhaus yay!

HOTT BOI

I missed him

He's missed them

I've missed him

Why does he look weary and sound kinda down tho im concerned

This should def be Fjord's job because he's so good

N: "Fjord, if you do well in there I'll give you... a BUTTON."

F: "A button...?"

N: "But not just any button. It's a special button, from Buttonbeard's ship."

....hm.

Mind control?

Oh this is fascinating

If it was Obann though then why the beacons?

Unless it's like... the Assembly is really behind it all

Whsipersssss but we all know hott boi is telling the truth

J: "should we always stay a little bit away from you?"

C: "I hope not"

Uh-oh she sounds unhappy because Rexxentrum

I love that they're pushi n't for mercy for this guy

Oh Yasha, my sweet girl

BQ: "Do you believe you are redeemable?"

Y: "I should hope so."

Goddamn Caleb what a speech

I like the Bright Queen so much better than Dwendal

Please send Essek please send Essek please send Essek

Except not if he's gonna die but don't let him die so please send Essek

Omg Jester sending an informative and concise message?? A miracle!! I'm so proud of her

Essek is so proud of them

And I want him to come hang out more I've MISSED HIM

Oh god PLEASE ask him about himself

"What's his mother's name" lol Liam

Essek: "I'm not particularly interesting and don't like to talk about myself" LIES the Internet needs to KNOW Essek!

J: "hey, Yasha? You're definitely redeemable."

Hmm was Essek being weird around Caleb? Or was he just tired?

I have a feeling now and idk what it is y'all stop trying to make he have doubts

lol this jam session

The neighbor's are probably sighing and going "Luxon help us the weirdos are back"

I've missed them man I'm glad we're back

#critical role #cr spoilers #emi watches critical role

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princessamericachavez · 5 years

Text

Fjorester moments episodes 70 and 71

HEY I’M NOT DEAD

I was just enjoying a few days offline on the beach, but I’m back and all caught up. So, who’s ready to review some Fjorester moments??

Episode 70

Jester: *trying to understand why the mountain doesn’t have snow*

Fjord: *softest heart eyes*

Jester: Well, I could send like four times but...

Fjord: That’s kind of a waste of your gifts, right?

Jester: Not necessarily, if it’s important.

I JUST REALLY LIKE HOW THE PAST FEW MISSIONS/DAYS FJORD HAS BEEN EXTRA THOUGHTFUL ABOUT HER SPELLS EVER SINCE SHE VOICED HER ANNOYANCE ABOUT IT THAT ONE TIME OKAY? HE PAYS ATTENTION

When Caleb says he can take Jester home to her mother and she just says that very soft “oh” and kinda spaces out and Fjord immediately notices something’s wrong

Fjord: You okay, Jester?

Jester: Mhm

Fjord: JUST KEEP WORRIEDLY STARING AT HER

WHAT KIND OF DISNEY FANFIC SHIT

Fjord *before he literally just steps outside the room to keep a lookout while staring directly at Jester*: I’m gonna- you’ll be okay in here?

Jester: *nods*

REMEMBER THAT ONE AWKWARD AF EXCHANGE IN ASSARIOUS WHERE FJORD ASKED IF SHE’D BE SAFE IN THE ROOMS THEY WERE STAYING AT?? THIS WAS JUST LIKE A CALL BACK TO THAT IMO

SAME FEELING, SAME WORRY, SAME SOFTNESS

IM FINE

Okay, so here might be my favorite one of this episode

when they are arguing about how to proceed

and Jester is getting all worked up and she’s angry and sad and still emotional about Yasha

Jester: I mean, honestly, I don’t give a fuck who we are with. I don’t care if it’s the Empire. I don’t care if it’s Xhorhas. I don’t care!

Fjord:

Fjord: What does matter? What if these men have families? What if they are in danger? What if what we can say can help?

Jester:

I think disagreements are, obviously, super important when you build a relationship with someone. A serious not crush-based relationship. And this point feels incredibly intense between them. The way he gets serious, and she can’t meet his eye, and how he keeps looking at her.

I don’t feel like Fjord is berating her, at all, either. It sounds, to me, like he is truly trying to understand where Jester stands and to make her see the moral conflict from his point of view.

What does matter? Is such a big and important question that they need to ask themselves, but I particularly like that Fjord seems inclined to figure it out with Jester, instead of just saying “this is what I think matters”.

And —this is the good part— Jester does listen to him! As she shows later on.

Fjord goes into a lengthier explanation about why he thinks they should stay, warn people, at the very least hope to help in the 24 hours they have left before returning to the capital. And he ends his speech clearly looking at her and with a plead:

Fjord: We could save lives.

And Jester nods.

Because she understands. Because they are again on the same page.

Jester: *wants to scry on Yasha*

Fjord: Do it, Jester.

I think they both want to know. They need to know.

Absolutely do not think about how this betrayal clearly hit them both the hardest (maybe second only to Beau) given everything they went through with Yasha back when the Shepherds took them.

Everyone: *talking about how Fjord should disguise himself to start a whisper campaign*

Jester: You want to do it, Fjord?

Fjord: Yeah, I’d be okay with that.

IT’S SO IMPORTANT TO ME THAT SHE CHECKS IN WITH HIM AND MAKES SURE THEY AREN’T SENDING HIM TO SOMETHING HE DOESN’T WANNA GO

Jester after her chaotic mission: I was all over the place with my accent, Fjord would’ve been so disappointed of me!

SHE’S SO SAD BECAUSE SHE CARES SO MUCH ABOUT HIS OPINION OF HER AND SHE WANTS HIM TO LIKE HER AND BE PROUD OF HER AND listen Beau is right and it might not be the healthiest but THERE’S A REASON HIS OPINION IS SO IMPORTANT TO HER

Beau: You know, you don’t need Fjord’s approval to be amazing, you know? You’re pretty cool. Do you need his validation?

I love Beauregard so much, she’s such a wonderful friend and honestly, this is the same advice I’d give a friend regarding her crush. Just because you like someone or you highly value their opinion of you, it shouldn’t mean you need their validation.

I think, in the long term, Beau will help Jester archive the healthy place she needs to make a relationship work.

Jester: *realize they left the moorbounders behind*

Fjord: *again, is the first one to notice she’s sad/shocked*

Fjord: C’mon, let’s stay on task.

He says it softly and, though this isn’t the shippiest thing, I really like that he makes sure to recenter her and keep moving.

It’s also funny and a lot more banter-y when she brings it up again and he just goes:

Fjord: The little death panthers will be fine by themselves, it’s fine

Also Jester both encourages Fjord to speak to the Bright Queen and to go peek into the cell, and I love both instances because they reinforce just how much Jester trusts Fjord and looks up to him when it comes to critical moments. Nice nice nice.

EPISODE 71

Admittedly, we didn’t get that much stuff this episode. One, because Skype makes things more complicated for everyone and Two because there was a lot going on.

I have this theory about most ships happening on face-to-face tables and brotps on side to side, and I feel like this placement kinda reinforced that a little... even if we did get a cute little gems.

Jester: Have you lived a really long time?

Fjord: !!!!!!

Darion: *reveals she’s nearly 200 years old*

Fjord: Fuck

WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY TO ME OMG

I love that he turns to look at her like DID YOU JUST HEAR THAT?? but she isn’t looking which is what i’m talking about with side-to-side limitations

Fjord: *asks Darion to investigate about Uk’otoa*

Jester:

SHE’S SO WORRIED

Also, though I’m frustrated by the placing, one thing i love about this is that, in my head —and most fanart, and the intro, and most official art—Fjord and Jester are always standing or sitting next to each other, so this kinda illustrates how they probably behave all the time.

Sharing looks, turning to the other, probably most of their talks are quiet exchanges like this, private little moments.

Beau: *mentions splitting the party*

Fjord and Jester: in sync