#first seb is but the second seb probably will take sometime
Note
Hurray for the 500!
Some breakfast Tea, the letter S and i would like to hear what you think about Seb, Lando, Carlos, Alonso or Lewis?
☕︎ breakfast tea
LN4, SV5, FA14, LH44, CS55 and 'S: Stamina: How many rounds can they go? How long can they last?'
LN4: Lando is stupidly horny when he's around you, and I mean stupidly. He's not sure what you're doing to him - whether you have some kind of spell over him, but there's so many times he's got you alone and just wants to ravish you.
He's an energetic guy, I feel like he can go for two or three rounds, but he's self aware. He struggles to last around you when you're looking that good, so will always make sure you finish first.
SV5: Sebastian, oh my goodness. There's a spark still in him, it's still there from his Red Bull days. He may come across as the sweetest gentleman, but when it comes to you, he's gone back 10 years.
He can easily go a few rounds, he's such a tease that he'll end up teasing himself, too. I'm saying probably three is his average. There are some days he will keep you pinned to the bed all day and have you over and over again.
FA14: Fernando is older, his stamina isn't what it used to be, but it doesn't mean he only goes for a little while. Remember this man back in his younger days? He's completely and utterly insatiable.
The whole thing about him is it's one round, but it's a round which will leave you shaking and quivering and so, so overstimulated. He's constantly edging you, making you hold yourself there and then pulling you back down.
LH44: There has never been a more passionate lover than Lewis; everything about him is deep; he's whispering the filthiest words to you and keeping his mouth so close to yours at every single moment. His breath on your skin is enough to send you into override.
Lewis does two rounds; the first is always with you finishing in his mouth, there's something about your taste which does something to him. Even if he's riling you up in every other way, finishing in his mouth is what he desires. The second is always in missionary, his lips pressed to yours as you both climax together.
CS55: If there's ever a man who can make you feel things you could never realise, it's Carlos. He's horny all the time, on the days he can hide away from the world with you, he's got you on every surface, in every bed, taking you over and over again.
This man genuinely has no limit to his rounds, he will go as long as you will. Sometimes a round is a few minutes, other times his dick is buried inside you for so long whilst his lips attack your neck, it can go for hours.
part of the vetteltea 500 celebration!
#vetteltea 500#LN4#Lando Norris#SV5#Sebastian Vettel#FA14#Fernando Alonso#LH44#Lewis Hamilton#CS55#Carlos Sainz#Lando Norris x Reader#Sebastian Vettel x Reader#Fernando Alonso x Reader#Carlos Sainz x Reader#Lewis Hamilton x Reader
643 notes
·
View notes
Note
which drivers would fuck you in your parents house ?😃🫠
10/10 ask thank you for your service.
Lewis- Lewis would absolutely. He has a right to fuck you anywhere he wants and you'd fucking love it. He’d get a bit of a thrill from it too with his exhibitionist tendencies, knowing that people might hear you. Teasing you about being quiet. He’d also keep the door unlocked for the thrill of it. You can't fuck him in his room though because he has too much respect for his family.
George- Oh he would enjoy it, although he would be more conservative about it. He’d lock the door, and make sure you kept quiet. He really enjoys making sure you keep quiet, and all the ways he can do that, but would be mortified if anybody actually heard.
Charles- Sharl can swing either way. Sometimes he will be respectful, probably when he first meets your parents, wanting to make the perfect impression and be the perfect gentleman. After a while though, he'd get cheeky with it, holding you close and whispering how much he loves you as he gently fucks into you, both being as quiet as you can. Fucking sharl in HIS childhood bedroom? Incredible. To watch that man bury his face into his pillow to try and not make a noise but be desperate enough to ask you for it anyways? Hello yes.
Daniel- Daniel would be so into this. He’d find it so funny and revel in you being a little bit stressed about the situation. He’d tease you the whole time but get off on knowing that you're letting him do this, that he can do this to you here of all places.
Sebastian- Red bull Seb? No hesitation. The cocky little shit would give it to you so hard! He'd love the thrill of it and he'd try as hard as possible to make you moan loudly. It's like a game to him. Seb now would at a push. He’d want to be respectful so, it’d be hard to get him to agree to it, but once you did the little shit inside of him would be thrilled. Also consider sub Seb (see gif) because IMAGINE putting that little twink in his place in his childhood bed. I bet he'd goad you into it but then you'd have to cover his mouth with your own to stop his desperate noises being too loud.
Fernando- Nando 100% would. He’d fucking love it. Nando would find it funny if anyone heard you and he’d probably tease you about how loud you’re being. How he’s just so good you can’t hold back. See this post for more if Nando fucking you in your parents house is your thing xoxo.
Senna- Rogue top senna thought but he would absolutely fuck you in your parents house. He’d be such a shit about it and you'd just have to take it. Back to bratty sub senna though, he’d probably refuse to and still be such a shit about it, but that just means you’ll just have to fuck him harder once you leave.
Fabio- Fab makes way too much noise for him to feel comfortable doing it while your parents are there. If your parents weren’t there at all he probably would because he’s just so desperate, he doesn’t want to keep waiting.
Honourable mention to Carlos who would be the perfect picture of a gentleman in front of your parents and then absolutely rail you the second the door is closed.
#lewis hamilton would rap to drown out your noise#a performance for the family#🐻 left this in the draft and it made me laugh so much its going in the tags#enjoy#f1blr#f1 imagine#george russell imagine#george russell smut#lewis hamilton imagine#lewis hamilton smut#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc smut#daniel ricciardo imagine#daniel ricciardo smut#sebastian vettel imagine#sebastian vettel smut#fernando alonso imagine#fernando alonso smut#ayrton senna imagine#ayrton senna smut#fabio quartararo imagine#fabio quartararo smut#george russell#lewis hamilton#charles leclerc#daniel ricciardo#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#ayrton senna#fabio quartararo
279 notes
·
View notes
Note
you get a part of redredred, the 2022 season sebchal that runs parallel to niamh's valewis. it follows the 2022 season and has flashbacks. its around 50k or more and dont think i'll ever finish it because it hurts, but who knows. 💜
Bahrain 2022
Seb wakes up on the couch and groans in discomfort. No matter how persistently he’d searched for the most comfortable couch out there, he still woke up hurting. It’s the age, not the couch, he thinks and sighs. Then he remembers yesterday.
A grin overtakes his face. Charles won.
Charles won, and Seb couldn’t help himself. He’d almost screamed when Charles was informed by Xavi that Max had engine problems, and hearing Charles scream and laugh in joy was… wonderful.
I’m not the last Ferrari GP winner, he thinks, and the thought doesn’t even hurt. Charles is, he thinks, and grabs his phone with a smile.
Two (2) new messages.
He’d congratulated only two people on the grid yesterday, because he couldn’t not. He was too tired to even contemplate picking up the call from Lance, or Lawrence, and he wanted to talk to Mick on the phone sometime today, because he knows that he would’ve taken finishing just out of the points very hard. He is still smiling as he opens the first message.
From: Charles
Please don’t hate me. Wish you were here.
His smile falls instantly.
“Fuck.”
Seb stares at the words on the screen. Please don’t hate me. Fuck. As if he would hate Charles, God. As if he could, for fucks’ sake. His head hurts. His fucking heart hurts.
“What have I done to you,” he mutters to himself, getting up to get some coffee. He knows he needs to eat, but he can’t stomach anything at the moment. He does take a glass of water and the coffee, and goes back to the couch.
One (1) new message.
“Fuck it,” he repeats. He needs to talk to someone. “Might as well.”
From: Lewis
Hey man, how are you? And thanks, I rly wasn't expecting it. It was a bouncy ride, a bit too bouncy if I'm being honest
Their chat history is open, the congratulatory message for the podium Seb had sent him the night before the last interaction they've had.
Seb hesitates for just a second, and then starts typing.
To: Lewis
Glad you made it through. I'm alright, feeling a bit better. Still tired though. How was Toto at the party? :)
From: Lewis
Susie was there, so you can imagine :) I think he wants to cut off even more parts from the car. He was pretty happy that ur home team had a bad day tho :)
Seb can't help but chuckle at that. The animosity between Christian and Toto always went deep, but it reached new heights in the last season. Seb gets it, and privately he thinks Toto is right about most things, but there is still a part of him that's probably always going to be uncomfortable about bad-mouthing Christian, even though the man has changed much throughout the years.
The fact that Lewis can tease him about Red Bull is a good sign, though. He still refuses to address them by name, which is a bit petty in Seb's opinion. Then again, Seb himself is far from being immune to pettiness.
To: Lewis
I know you don't mean Ferrari, because they wiped the floor with you :)
He regrets the message as soon as he sends it, especially when the answer comes back instantly.
From: Lewis
Yeah, Carlos was so good, man, easily one of his best drives. Your boy was on fire tho. The way he defended, damn. Did you see it?
Seb hates the way his pulse quickens. He hates the way Lewis' words make him feel. He shouldn't be feeling like this, because. Well. Because nothing and no one in Bahrain is his. Lewis' message is calculated to provoke him, but Seb doesn't mind it that much. He knows what his friend is doing - giving him a push and an out at the same time. It's on Seb to take it or leave it.
To: Lewis
Yeah, I watched the race. Wanted to see what the cars could do, and some of it was surprising. Good for Kevin and Mick :)
He pauses. He could leave it at that, and Lewis would accept it. They don't have to talk about it anymore. He can just leave it all at that.
Seb can't help himself. He never was one for avoidance; at least not with Lewis. Maybe only with Lewis.
To: Lewis
He's not my boy.
The reply is instantaneous.
From: Lewis
Not for lack of trying on his part
From: Lewis
Did you at least congratulate him?
Seb closes his eyes for a moment, covers them with his hand. He wants not to have this conversation. He wants a Jäger shot. He wants -
It doesn't matter what he wants. A lot of things don't matter, even though he wants them to. A lot of things matter, even though he tries to pretend they are as unimportant as possible.
Lewis could always see through him, though. Seb owes him honesty, and cares for him too much to try to mislead him; the only person he lies to regularly is himself, really. He appreciates Lewis too much to lie to him in any way. They’ve been through everything, and they’ve faced it all more or less together, and there was no reason anymore to keep up pretenses, when they knew one another inside and out in both the best and worst ways.
He knows why Lewis texted him, and he can't help but smile. Lewis always saw too much with those eyes of his, and he knew Seb needs the push.
To: Lewis
He asked me not to hate him.
To: Lewis
As if I ever could.
The reply is slow to come, or it just seems that way. Seb stares at his phone the whole time after sending the message, his heart in his throat. All the reasons for his avoidance of the topic come to mind, and he tries to take a deep breath to calm himself. He opens Lewis' message.
All that he manages to do is choke on air and almost cough out his lungs when Lewis' messages come in one after the other.
From: Lewis
I asked him if he wanted to be lifted in the air. He said, and I had to google this to write it right jsyk, "Nicht jetzt, danke". His pronunciation is terrible tho, worse than mine
From: Lewis
I think he missed you on the podium
From: Lewis
I think he misses you a lot
I miss him too, Seb thinks. I miss him so much, but it doesn't matter. It's better this way, Seb thinks. "Il Predestinato," he whispers to himself. He sighs and types.
To: Lewis
It's better like this.
Lewis' reply is angry, and Seb should have maybe expected it, but it still takes him aback.
From: Lewis
For fucking who, Seb?
Sebastian has committed himself to this course of action, or, well, inaction, and he will stick to it. He has to.
To: Lewis
For him. He has the car now, and his whole destiny. He is older, and more experienced, and he isn't impatient any more.
He hesitates, then adds on the phrase he's been repeating to himself for the past two years at least.
To: Lewis
He doesn't need me. Not anymore.
From: Lewis
Is that what you tell yourself so you can sleep easier?
From: Lewis
You were always bad at lying, man, but this is just pathetic
Fuck, Seb thinks. Lewis always sees too much, and this time he's not backing off for some reason. "Fuck you," he says out loud to himself so he doesn't say it to Lewis in a fit of anger that's bubbling under his skin, because Lewis is right. Seb loves him and hates him for it equally.
Lewis is one of Sebastian's best friends on the grid, and the one who understands him the best in some ways. It wasn't always like that, but after 2016, many things have changed. Nico left, and Seb didn't think about that anymore, like he didn't think about many things anymore. In another life, where they weren't racing drivers and each others biggest competition for a whole decade, and where they met at a later point in life, and where there was no Nico and no Mark to shape them into who they were when the time was right, Seb would've been in love with Lewis, and vice versa. Maybe he is a bit in love with him anyways, because honestly, who isn't? Lewis is amazing, and kind, and one of the strongest people Seb knows, and he respects him too much as a person and a competitor, and loves him too much to push for something that just would not work. Not the way they are, and not with their history, and especially not in this world where both Valtteri Bottas and Charles Leclerc exist.
Because no matter how much Seb loves Lewis for pushing him, a part of him is angry, because Lewis is being such a hypocrite right now. He is right about Sebastian, but he is still being a hypocrite, and Seb is too tired and hurting a bit too much to let him get away with it.
To: Lewis
How's Valtteri?
He gets up and refills his coffee as he waits to see what Lewis will say.
From: Lewis
There's the bastard I know
From: Lewis
He's fine. Didn't ask me if i hated him, bcs I'm a normal person who still speaks to his former teammate and friend normally
To: Lewis
So you normally took him up on that normal coffee date?
From: Lewis
Fuck you
To: Lewis
Once wasn't enough for you? :)
Seb couldn't resist reminding Lewis of the one and only time they slept together in 2016 occasionally. It wasn't something either of them dwelled on needlessly, even though it was definitely some of the best sex Seb's ever had. It was fun, and amazing, and heart-breaking, and just an inch shy of too much at the same time, and neither of them ever regretted it. They did both agree the next morning not to repeat it, because the bruises they left on each other were just a bit too painful, and the way they looked at each other as they were fucking was just a bit too raw, and for the whole time their thoughts were just a bit too focused on the men who were their teammates, and they both knew it. Neither of them resented the other for it, and that fundamental understanding that it was just not the right time for them and it never would be may be the reason why they became and stayed such good friends.
From: Lewis
It was at least two times that night, and stop changing the subject :)
To: Lewis
I'm really not. It's the same thing.
From: Lewis
I know
From: Lewis
Man, where did all our bravery go?
To: Lewis
We left it on track sometime in late 2010's :)
From: Lewis
You might be right there
From: Lewis
Fuck we're old
Seb chuckles, because Lewis is both right and wrong. Being on top of the world in your early twenties screwed them both up in some fundamental way, and with both of them being overachievers and determined to win, their perception of the world and their age was impossibly skewered. Seb knows he is going to have to re-evaluate what he wants to do in his life again really soon, but that was a conversation for another time, and to be made in person. Another text from Lewis pulls him out of his thoughts.
From: Lewis
What will you do now?
Seb sighs for god-knows which time and scratches his beard. He should shave soon; he has that video-conference with Aston Martin on Wednesday, and he should look less like a hobo and more like a professional who has his life together. I should look less like a lovesick fool, he thinks and then rolls his eyes at his own propensity for dramatics.
To: Lewis
I have no idea. You?
Lewis' reply makes Seb bark out a laugh.
From: Lewis
Get a bloody muffin. Feelings are exhausting
To: Lewis
Yeah. Maybe we shouldn't talk about them then :)
Lewis doesn't reply, and Seb takes that as a sign that his friend is as tired as he is of the emotional turmoil they've both been going through. It's probably for the best. Seb needs to sleep some more, his body rebelling against even the little exertion he's had today.
He puts his phone on the table and lays on the couch. Maybe the universe will be merciful to him today, and he won't dream of heart-breaking eyes and French-accented voice speaking to him in terrible German.
#f1 rpf#trick or treat asks#effervescendragonwrites#imma tag this#sebchal#valewis#but also sewis#bcs its two of them here#naila 💜#redredred reference
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
Weekly Tag Wednesday Thursday
Thank you @darlingian for creating this week’s game. Thanks for the tag @juliakayyy @lingy910y @jrooc @sam-loves-seb @mmmichyyy @mickeysgaymom @deedala @metalheadmickey @creepkinginc @stocious @mybrainismelted @energievie
Which character from any media would you like to have as a father?
Magnus Bane (Shadowhunters) would be pretty cool, AND magic.
If money, laws, time, and effort were no object, what animal would you want to have?
Do laws include laws of science and… y’know… reality? If not… Mother fucking dragon, baby!
What is your Chinese takeout order?
Salt & Pepper chicken. Duck pancakes. Satay chicken. Prawn crackers. An insane quantity of spring rolls for @rutherinahobbit
What's your favorite emoji?
I’ve become very fond of 🫡, but the one I use most often is probably 🥺 - it’s literally my face. I look at Ruth like that and say ‘I am the emoticon’ and then she has to be nice to me… 🥺
Would you rather have a library, greenhouse, or home theater in your house?
Library. For the aesthetic and the comfy comfy reading nooks! Also I would be able to have all my favourite fic bound and displayed in the library <3 <3 <3
What childhood tv show do you think of the most fondly?
My Little Pony and Animals Of Farthing Wood
What was your tumblr like when you first joined?
I had it for longer, but I first started really using it for Shadowhunters, and 90% of the fandom was here, before it largely moved to Twitter, and now has been struggling to move back, so has sort of become a bit homeless 🥺
What clothing style do you love but don't feel compelled to replicate yourself?
Anything neat and tailored. I think it looks fly AF, but I have neither the body type nor the patience for it.
If you were plopped into a fictional world, which one would you know the layout of the best?
Stars Hallow is really good shout I’ve seen other people use. Also any fictional TV show that basically takes place in a home, only. I’d be all over that! haha
What is your favorite piece of art?
I’ve been obsessed with ‘Dream Caused by the Flight of a Bee Around a Pomegranate a Second Before Awakening’ ever since I was about 10 years old.
Do you have a water bottle? what does it look like?
I recently broke my water bottle so I’ve got a temporary replacement one and I hate it. It’s boring and too big and not the right shape. Grr.
What fanfic trope is a quiet fave?
I’m pretty loud about all my fic feelings. Sometimes I unexpectedly enjoy a Mafia/Crime AU, though I would never go looking for it!
Do you carry a daily bag? what does it look like? what's the weirdest thing in it?
I’ve got three. A tote bag for when I bring lunch Tupperwares into work or otherwise have to transport big things. A large backpack for when I bring my laptop into work or travel. And a tiiiiiiiny backpack (smaller than A5) and the weirdest thing is how much stuff I manage to fit into it! First Aid Kit. Sewing Kit. Wallet. Phone. Portable Phone Charger. Sunglasses. Tissues. Cigarettes. House keys. Pill box. Misc. hair things for when other people need them.
If you had to ship Mickey with another Gallagher, who would it be?
Carl. Ultimate chaos couple!!!! 🙌
What is a fanfic trope you didn't expect to like and then very much did?
We all know the old adage: You're only ever one good fic away from developing that weird kink you keep making jokes about, stay humble.
There’s nothing that hits quite the way an unexpected horny swoop hits! Stay humble. Stay open. Stay curious.
Do you think s11 Mickey can still carry s11 Ian?
Mickey Milkovich voice: YUP YUP
Who got custody of the killing bat when they sold the house?
Agree with @lingy910y - I absolutely see Mickey and Carl fighting for the bat! it’s their potato masher!! <3
Tagging @silvanshadow @captainjowl @thisdivorce @crestfallercanyon @heymacy @ohkate @too-schoolforcool @heymrspatel @gallawitchxx @callivich @crossmydna @palepinkgoat @vintagelacerosette @the-rat-wins @tsuga-of-mars @you-are-so-much-better-than-that @ian-galagher @imikhailotakeyouian @mikhailoisbaby @depressedstressedlemonzest
38 notes
·
View notes
Text
The 2010 Season: The Greatest Ride
(This is an old blog post from July 19th 2023)
AKA: Niamh yaps about a random F1 advert from 2011. Here's a bit of a curveball.
My original plan for my second blog post (a deep dive of sorts into the mythic nature of being a Ferrari driver) has been momentarily put on hold to make way for whatever this will be. And I have yet to know what this will be or how it will turn out but stick with me, okay!
Some context first. Picture me at 11pm eating some Shreddies as a before-bed snack and finding things to watch on Youtube while I do (because eating without having a video to watch is a fate worse than death), when I come across a video titled "BBC F1 2011 INTRO". I'm instantly like "oh awesome, love me a bit of The Chain", thinking this would be similar to other F1 intros of the 2010s era.
(Try and tell me you can listen to that song without thinking of Formula One.)
I was wrong.
What I was witnessed to instead was enough to make me stop eating altogether. I put the spoon down. My Shreddies were left to drown in the milk but I didn't care, I was physically unable to move as a result of this video. It was a montage of various moments from the previous 2010 season (a beloved season to me), set amongst Hans Zimmer's iconic 'Time' from Inception and over the top was a poem narrated by Eddie Jordan.
"But Niamh, that sounds way more boring and normal than you made it out to be. Shreddies drowned for this?" I hear you say. You underestimate how much a bit of film soundtrack and spoken poetry can impact a girl. I was so impacted, in fact, that I was suddenly fully prepared to pause my planned blog post (which in all honestly I still have yet to find the inspiration for, so maybe this is a good thing!) and write this one instead. I have got to talk about some of these quotes and what they refer to. Think of this as a sort of 2010 season mini recap, but only the most dramatic moments.
Here is the video, by the way. I urge you to check it out.
https://youtu.be/k_hFOC42Qcw
Let's begin!
(A warning: this is all just going to be meaningless drivel from my brain. But you probably already knew that)
“It had charging snorting bulls in the ring tamed only by those two who rode them. Unable sometimes to tame themselves, unable to control their own beast within”
Who doesn't love a metaphor? Obviously this refers to Sebastian and Mark at Red Bull and their tumultuous relationship that had started to develop by the second year of their partnership. Most people think mainly about 2013's Multi 21 incident when talking about the pair's most tense moment, but 2010 had its fair share of these too. Firstly, the wildly entertaining Turkish Grand Prix saw them collide after Seb attempts to overtake Mark on the inside. Due to the angle of Seb's car they made contact and he is sent spinning off into the gravel, with Mark managing to escape being stuck and continuing the race. This moment is so iconic, I think, because of Seb's reaction to it (watch it on Youtube if you haven't already, it's great) and the fact it was the catalyst for the downfall of their relationship. Not helped by the fact that three races later at Silverstone, an incident with Seb's front wing in final practice meant that the team replaced it with Mark's newly upgraded one. Seb then went on to take pole position in qualifying. As a result, talk about favouritism within the team arose. But that's a blog post for another day. Anyway, I love this quote and I think it sums them up perfectly; sometimes they really were unable to tame the beasts within. The way the shot moves from Seb laughing with Britta to Mark in the background looking all solemn and serious? Art.
“It had intrigue and inviting. It had a prancing horse and a rider asked to take a fall”
It's quite easy to wax poetic when it comes to Ferrari, but I think this line is just so good. I love it when Ferrari is referred to as the 'prancing horse', there's something so elegant about it. The lineup for 2010 included newcomer Fernando Alonso and Felipe Massa, who had already been part of the team for a few seasons. The season before Felipe had undergone surgery due to an accident at the Hungarian Grand Prix, and understandably he had a slow return back to his usual form once the 2010 season began. As a result, by the German Grand Prix, Massa was 31 points behind Alonso and therefore not a championship contender. It was during the last few laps of this race that Massa was ahead of his teammate for a 1st place finish when he received a message from his race engineer Rob Smedley informing him that Alonso was faster. He quite literally said, ‘Fernando is faster than you, can you confirm that you understood the message?’. Felipe let his teammate through to take the 1st place trophy. Ferrari, despite claiming that the incident didn't involve illegal team orders, were fined $100,000 for the controversy. It didn't help that Smedley literally apologised to Massa after the original message... whoops. How many riders of the prancing horse have been asked to take the fall?
"It had those who would not lie down and told that they were not the chosen one."
The term "chosen one" has so much weight to it, right? Obviously this line relates to Mark during his time opposite Seb at Red Bull. Mark frequently vocalised his feelings surrounding the apparent favouritism within the team despite their adamance that there was no such notion. The initial tension caused by the swapping of front wings at the British Grand Prix was soon diminished once Seb took a trip off track and received a puncture, meaning Mark was able to storm ahead and take the win. During his cool down lap he announced over the radio, "not too bad for a number two driver", referring to the idea that Sebastian was Red Bull's favourite. This wouldn't be the first time Mark brought the subject up in a public manner, so it's definitely true that he refused to lie down and accept what was happening. No matter how much they tried to deny it, Sebastian was always Red Bull's 'chosen one'. The chosen one hand picked personally to bring the team to the top after years of disappointing results. And that he did. But God, did Mark try his best!
"It had new and old; new faces, new machines, new blood. And an echo of the past, a name, a memory."
One of the moments that genuinely gave me chills. The 2010 season brought with it five rookies, including Nico Hulkenberg and Karun Chandhok, as well as new teams. There were also new regulations regarding a ban on refuelling, a ban on double diffusers and a collective agreement not to use KERS. But despite the fresh faces and rule changes this season indeed brought several echos to the past. The 2010 season saw the return of a familiar name in Team Lotus, which hadn't taken part in F1 since the 1990s. Their livery even referenced the classic green and yellow colours of the original Lotus cars of the 60s. One of the rookies introduced this year was Bruno Senna, nephew of Ayrton Senna (who even raced for Lotus during his career). I remember while I was watching the 2010 Bahrain Grand Prix, Bruno's engine overheated and there was a shot of his eyes through his visor. Martin Brundle reacted to the shot by saying, "that scares me, that looks like Ayrton through the crash helmet when the visor is open... it stops me in my tracks." Despite his unremarkable rookie season, I'm sure he brought back a lot of memories for F1 personnel and fans alike. In a similar vain, 2010 was the year that 7-time world champion Michael Schumacher returned to the grid to drive for the also returning Mercedes GP team after retiring in 2006. 2010 was the year of throwbacks and nostalgia.
"It had the spectre at the feast; a falling god now reigning against his own mortality and risking that of others."
Used to talk about Michael, this line was SO interesting to me. Firstly, the description of him as the 'spectre at the feast'. This phrase can be linked to a scene in Shakespeare's Macbeth where the ghost of murdered Banquo appears at a feast, and is used to refer to someone or something that brings misery or sadness to a happy or celebratory occasion. So why was this used in reference to Schumacher? Of course, the legend's return to the sport brought with it a lot of hope and anticipation that he would return to his former glory once he raced again. Nevertheless, Michael struggled to get good results in his first stint back. A new generation of cars and regulations, and a team which struggled to improve upon its previous success (Mercedes GP replaced 2009 constructor's champion Brawn GP), can't have made it easy for him. Thus commenced a season of misery and disappointment for those once hopeful fans. A so called "spectre at the feast". "A falling god reigning against his own mortality"; a god of the sport attempting to reestablish his former glory but unfortunate timing and circumstances meant he had to accept he was no longer untouchable. The last part of the line refers to Michael's sometimes aggressive driving style, specifically the incident at Hungary where he squeezed former teammate Rubens Barrichello against the wall of the pit lane while defending. The dangerous move was punished with a 10-place grid penalty the next race. People often claimed that while Michael never lost his ruthlessness, he had lost other aspects once apparent in his original F1 stint. Whoever came up with that line deserves a Nobel Peace Prize in literature.
And there we go. The 2010 season recapped in the words of whichever brilliant mastermind at the BBC F1 team came up with that poem, and a bit of my knowledge sprinkled in as its one of my favourite seasons. There's just something about art when it's combined with Formula One because the effects it has on a simple girl like me is groundbreaking. I eat it up every time! It turns simple car racing to something much more dramatic and emotional and interesting and I value every person who creates art dedicated to F1.
Please never stop.
Anyway. That was really long and probably quite boring, but I had so much fun writing it. I love talking about old seasons and I'll probably do it again in other posts. I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless!
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
Daniel/Max, quiet
In my head, this is set sometime vaguely around the Saudi GP. I'm new, so I'm still working out how this all works, please don't eat me.
-
Max’s doorman lets Daniel inside the hallway to the private elevators without a fuss. He wishes the doorman had stopped him in his tracks; he wishes he had forgotten the code to Max’s private elevator. Then maybe Daniel would have to think of a better reason why he’s outside Max’s door on a Tuesday afternoon after a race.
He doesn’t think of a good enough reason between the elevator ride and rapping his knuckles on Max’s door, so he says the only reason that’s reverberating in his head when Max appears in front of him.
“I didn’t know where else to go.”
It’s quiet for a second before Max opens the door wider, letting Daniel in with a small smile. Daniel takes longer than usual to kick off his shoes at the entryway. He watches as Max heads to the kitchen and out a few moments later with a couple of bottles in his hands.
Daniel meets him in the living room and wordlessly sits on the couch. He feels something soft brush against his leg before hearing gentle snuffling, followed by a steady, contented purr. “Hey, Sassy girl,” he says. Daniel feels tired but not tired enough to ignore Max’s cats. They deserve his best, always.
There’s a cold feeling against his hand. He stares at Max as he takes the drink offered to him. Daniel can’t remember the last time he’s seen anything so clear and vivid, but Max’s eyes are piercing, and he’s struck stupid at how bright they look. It’s not the first time he’s noticed Max’s eyes--it probably won’t even be the last. It’s the first time he’s caught how long Max’s eyelashes are, though, he can’t look away from the contrast between the sharp, angular lines of Max’s face and the lightness of his eyelashes.
Max is sitting so close to him. He half expects Max to switch to one of the armchairs, maybe the other couch--there’s room. Instead, Max settles deeper into the couch with him, their knees touching, their pinky fingers gently brushing together. It’s barely noticeable; Daniel would have missed it if he hadn’t been so laser-focused on all of the parts of him that are connected to Max.
All he can think about is Max. All he’s been thinking about is Max.
Some days, maybe if he’s honest, on days precisely like today, it feels like thinking about Max is the only thing keeping him tethered to the ground. Nothing he does seems to be working at all this season, and thinking about Max is the only thing that doesn’t feel like work at all.
“Where are we, Daniel?”
Max’s words feel like a punch to the gut: shocking and unexpected. He feels shattered; he can’t believe Max even remembers.
“Where are we, Max?” Daniel used to ask, usually and especially after Max came back from a meeting with his father.
And then he’d let Max imagine a place with him, somewhere far from where they were, where for a little bit, Max was allowed the space to breathe.
“Max, you don’t have to--” Daniel starts, but Max interrupts him quickly.
“Daniel,” Max says, firm. Then his voice softens again. “Where are we?”
It’s impossible to stop the shudder that runs through him. Then, like a switch, Daniel feels his body go slack, finally uncoiling from the knot of tension he’d been working through for weeks. He doesn’t know how it’s possible, but they’re sitting even closer together now, and he can feel Max’s body heat pierce through to his skin.
Max’s hand covers his, gentler than he’s ever imagined. Daniel breathes.
“Not anywhere with sand,” he says, smiling slightly. “Somewhere cold. Maybe Canada. Maybe Switzerland, if Seb lets us hide in his chalet...”
171 notes
·
View notes
Note
Abo finishing school . Seb being the omega home economics teacher and offers 3 types of lessons alphas, mixed and omega only. normally most go to the mixed lessons but max only turns up for the omegas only lessons and finds that max is an engaging student and not rude like that the other teachers say. Max finds that he can talk to you seb but doesn't tell him everything until he's told toto.
Seb even offers to go out with max to museum and if he's going to the market or the library he offers to take him with the him. Max often notices a beautiful alpha male near by the when out with seb (probably kimi but could be jenson ) and ask seb about him seb tells him that he's his mate but I understands that max is scared of alphas but wanted to keep them safe and so keeps his distance from them . Max was shocked because he never said he's scared of alphas to anyone but toto.
Sebs mate I becomes the same second alpha max trusts and ends up taking private lessons from him
Oh plsss!!
Seb would be so sweet and understanding! He knows not all young Omegas like to be around Alphas so it's very important he gets to offer the class as omega only too!
Maybe Max is the only person in the Omega only class? And he is a little shy but eager to learn snd really respectful to seb, so different to what seb,hesrd from other teachers!
Max trusts Seb but still doesn't tell him everyrhung because it's too painful. But he likes seb and is happy to come along on trips to the market or library! It's fun and seb teaches him a lot 🥺
Max starts noticing a handsome Alpha following them around quietly but at a safe distance anf is a little freaked out at first. But then he maybe spots the mating mark in Seb's neck, normally hidden by his shirts and is pretty sure it must be seb's mate, also because he is sure seb wouldn't have been so calm with a stranger following them!
Pls it being jenson would be so cute! He is so sweet and goofy and likes to annoy seb and Max likes seeing such a healthy relationship. He trusts jenson, it isn't as strong as with Toto, but he knows jenson will look out for him! Pls Max sometimes going home with seb and jenson? When Toto is busy or has to go abroad, so Max stays in the little cottage with Seb and Jenson and loves fusses over all the animals! And Seb coming back home one day to see Jenson very carefully playfighting Max? Poking and tickling his stomach to have Max giggle and lazily swat at his hands 🥺
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Welcome to the Valley~
I kept getting distracted instead of making a small summary post for Iris' playthrough, but I want to put it up here before I play too far lol.
I've been working on some sketches for her, but please enjoy the WIPS since I keep getting distracted. During the first years, her main circle of friends is: Shiro, Yuuma, Philip, Sebastian, Sam, Leah, Hayley, Alex Kiarra, & Shane :)
The bus ride was rather exausting, but after Lewis and Robin showed her to the new farm, Iris was very pleased to have the afternoon to get settled.
She probably spent most of the first week just clearing the land around the farmhouse, and enough to clear a small path towards the town, and the mountains, as well as one around her coop so she doesn't lose track of the chicks when they are out.
She ran into Alex pretty quickly, probably on the second or third day. He found her petting Dusty, chatting to the good boy. Iris isn't a super sporty person, but lots of classmates and coworkers in Zuzu were big gridball fans so she knows enough of it. She feels like Alex is a bit full of himself, but a good guy. They click well enough.
The meeting with Abigail and her family was not the best, she was a bit on edge that morning, and Abby came in swinging with the "It's a shame you moved here" welcome line. Pierre was also pushing the salesman front quite hard, and Iris can't stand that.
She met Phillip, Yuuma, and Shiro very briefly on a day when they were in Pelican Town for their therapy. It was just a short conversation, but she got along well with all of them.
It took her nearly two weeks to get the courage to take the cable cars up to the ridge. The first ride she ended up having a panic attack, during the afternoon. A tourist who was taking the car along with her ran to get Lenny and Paula while Iris struggled to get to her feet and get her heart and breathing under control. Phillip, Shiro, and Yuuma happened to be coming back on the next car, and Phillip was quick to help talk her through the attack. Girl was mortified, but super appreciative when they all walked her to the hotel for a bit.
Since then, she would say hi to them whenever she saw them in town. She didn't go back to the ridge for another 2 weeks though.
When she learned that Yuuma often stopped at Pierre's on his own to do grocery shopping she's determined to give him a hand. She shifts her schedule around a little bit so that she has one day she can spend up at the ridge. She offers to help Yuuma carry the groceries up. He does initially say it's ok and he doesnt want to cause trouble for her, but she tells him he would actually be helping her- having a goal/chore that takes her up on a regular basis can help her get over her fears. Plus, she'd feel safer if he keeps her company. He says ok after that. I headcanon Yuuma as like 8 years old or so? I don't remember if we ever get any closer age.
Throughout the first year she becomes very close with Shiro, Philip and Yuuma. Yuuma especially starts to see her as a sort of older sister, feels comfortable asking her for help, and sometimes asks to visit her farm. Iris also fully adopts Yuuma, and does her best to lessen the workload for him.
She beat Abigail at the egg hunt during the first year and Abigail was wildly bitter about it, not helping. These two just do not get along.
It doesn't help when Abigail walks by Sam's and sees that Iris is hanging out on the lawn in front of his places with both Sam and Sebastian (Abigail is crushing hard on Seb, and is a wee possesive)
Nearly missed the summer Luau, she was completely lost in finishing a new book that Sebastian had just lent her. They share similar tastes in what they like reading, and this along with music is the main building point of their friendship.
Her friends and some of their fam start picking up on her habit of making little cards or bookmarks or small trinkets with pressed flowers and leaving them around as surprise gifts for them. Granny Evelyn in particular loves getting these, and Iris is happy to help her out with the garden beds around town from time to time. Alex finds this mega endearing.
Seb, Sam, and Iris continue the Solarian Chronicles campaign, and Victor and Sophia join them later in the year. The group begins to become a bit closer due to this. Abi joins from time to time, but seems to never quite feel comfortable or fit the party much.
She gets along well with Shane, and they're close-ish but she was very surprised and very worried when she found just how bad his mental health is. She makes a concsious effort to check in on him more often, and they somtimes have evenings where she brings a book and reads at the ranch while he helps Marnie, and they chat on and off. Shane still delivers feed and other things from Marnie's to her farm, and has definitely found her asleep on the floor of the coop with a book in her lap, and a chicken too, on more than one occasion. Maybe he thinks thats cute, but you won't be hearing him admit it.
Fall, um.... June Arrived. And Iris might be in trouble y'all.
She loves listening to him play the piano at the Ridgeside hotel, and they get along very well. He's even more of a coffee nerd than she is, which was surprising. So when they had a little breakfast hangout/date and he was nerding out about coffee, no, she wasn't bored at all. Was that a blush? maybe.
and holycrapJunewhat That dialogue killed me- Iris was trying to be a silly flirt and I feel like June absolutely called her bluff and left her a tomato-faced mess. It's a shame he's only here for half of the year, she'd love to get to know him better.
She continues to to become closer with Shiro, Phillip and Yuuma. (Yuuma was the first villager i got full hearts with). She occasionally helps them with the physio as well, and some minor chores at the Kobayashi house. It's a nice way to spend time with them and chat, and for the first few months while she didn't have a kitchen, it was a good excuse to use theirs and make them dinner sometimes.
Dinner at the Legame house also becomes somewhat of a frequent occasion- She likes to help out Kiarra, and they always end up chatting late into the night. Iris loves listeining to all of Kiarra's wild stories with Joja sabotage and boycotts. Anton also grows to really enjoy her company, but his heart belongs to Paula.
As we turn to spring of Year 2, the layout of the farm is looking like this! She keeps a steady turnaround of coffee and tea, two grape varieties and honey. She makes wine and jam as well and only a small-ish selection of seasonal crops. She grows flowers near her house, and is working on renovating the little guest cabin close to the shipping box. And we got our first cow!
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Tagged by @hrhgeorgerussell to post the first sentences of my WIPs thank you!!!
OK first off: the state of my WIPs folder is dire. I literally have hundreds of docs and I am notorious for starting something 5+ years before I actually sit down and finish it. I'm gonna choose ones I'm either actively working on or actively rotating, or started semi-recently before getting sidetracked.
Some NSFW under the cut.
Welcome to My Island (F1, Max/George): Somehow, George manages to log a solid chunk of REM sleep despite his neuroses. He only has a second or two to feel relieved about this before realizing that he’s hard, and that his erection is nestled perfectly against the small of Max’s back.
This one is on AO3 already so this is from the second chapter (unfinished).
Untitled F/F Lestappen Fic (F1, Max/Charles, Charles/Lewis, Max/George):
“George, I swear to God if you move, I’ll—” Max doesn’t have an actual follow through, but the half-threat is enough to still George underneath her.
This was the very first fic idea I had for F1 so it's very messy and I didn't know where I was going with it. Now that I know more about how races work and such I'll probably come back to it.
Summer Sun & Wildfire (F1, Max/Daniel): Max was supposed to die in Las Vegas. Sometimes she wishes she had.
This was the second thing I tried writing in the fandom so still in the awkward exploration phase trying to find out what works. I do want to come back to it someday because it had a lot of potential.
Red Light Spells Danger (F1, Max/Daniel): "I wish I could tell you how it feels without telling you what I did."
Still in the rotation phase for this one so this isn't necessarily the first sentence, just the only actual sentence I've written. Everything else is vague outline.
Untitled BBQ fic (F1/Seb/Mark): Seb is sprawled out on the tiled floor of the guest bathroom with the handle of her hairbrush stuffed in her cunt when the doorbell rings.
This entire fic is just toxic filth so we'll see when/if I finish it.
Untitled Succession/Yellowstone AU (F1, Max/George, Max/Charles): “Is it mine?” Max had been dreading—anticipating—the moment when Charles would ask, but she hadn’t been expecting to be ambushed in her childhood bedroom during a nap, before George had even arrived with the rest of the Russell clan in tow, before Max had even gotten a chance to make her announcement in the first place.
This is more inspired by the above shows than a true AU. I had a lot of ideas for this but got distracted by other projects before I could put together a true outline.
These are all longer fics; the rest are first lines from some shorter fics I've half-written.
They’re two-hundred miles off the coast of Western Australia when the storm hits. “Power’s fucked,” Seb reports after emerging from the engine room looking considerably sweatier than before he’d gone in. “It’ll take a few hours to fix, but I don’t want to risk frying the backup now while we’ve still got some daylight left.” (F1, Max/Daniel/Seb/Mark/Alex/Pierre/Kvyat)
They send porn to each other sometimes. Usually, it’s Daniel who sends it, feeling a bit vulnerable, a bit embarrassed, every single time, no matter what the subject matter is. And it’s not like he sends Max anything weird—most of the time, it’s just the same old shit, a blonde girl taking a big cock, getting her pussy fingered so hard she squirts, so on and so forth. It’s normal. He doesn’t have anything to be ashamed of. (F1, Max/Daniel)
“What is this meant to be, like some couple’s therapy?” Max complains, crossing her arms over her chest with an exaggerated pout. (F1, Christian/Max/George/Toto, Good Battle continuation)
#tag meme#my fics#i am so sorry for how long this is if you made it to the end thanks for your time you are god's strongest soldier#this is really exposing me as a girl driver enjoyer in a big way#i was going to include some ones from other fandoms too but this got so out of hand#adhd go brrrr#not tagging bc i think everyone i could tag has already been tagged so!
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
in which i’ll never be able to leave this hellsite until lia does.
he doesn’t know how this night managed to go so spectacularly WRONG. it was a simple job with an idiot for a target. nobody was supposed to know he was even there. especially not his hit. but that’s exactly where everything started to get fucked.
first, his target not only saw him, but expected him. was waiting for him. the first time seb moved, his target’s dark gaze snapped to him and he sneered a taunting smile. how did he know? well, that’s the fucking question of the night, isn’t it.
second, there was a bloody CIVILIAN in the mix. a decade ago, sebastian would have shot her himself and just buried the guilt. but that part of his life is past him now. when she refused to cooperate with her captor, who was idiotically trying to convince her sebastian was the real danger to her, the man got annoyed and fucking shot her. it was a non-lethal shot so long as she could be treated, but that still didn’t leave seb much time.
when she was turned into a human shield, seb again considered finishing her off. he hated himself the moment the thought crossed his mind, but sometimes old habits don't dissolve the moment one decides to turn a new leaf. sebastian couldn’t shoot because, for all his faults, the idiot actually managed to keep his head hidden behind hers.
all this left sebastian with just one option. CHARGE. this decision earned the young woman a knife across her throat and a shove in the other direction. the actual fight was quick enough, though sebastian earned himself a few shots to his ribs for the trouble he went through to get his hands around the man’s head before he twisted and snapped his neck.
one look at the woman told him he didn’t have time to dispose of the body tonight. which is why he now finds himself sitting on the coffee table in his flat, his main place of residence, staring at the bandaged and treated woman lying on his couch. she definitely saw his face, so taking her to the hospital isn’t an option. the body he was after tonight is in the boot of his car. he has no idea what the fuck he’s supposed to do now. she’ll live, but she’ll have scars. she’ll probably need therapy. she’ll maybe never laugh when someone sneaks up behind her for a surprise hug again.
seb dips a rag into a bowl of warm water and reaches over her to clean more of her blood off her skin. he’s changed her clothes into a pair of joggers that belong to his sister and one of his t-shirts. the rest of her clothes are burning in his small backyard. when she stirs, his eyes snap to her face. there’s a syringe beside him in case she screams. it’ll put her to sleep long enough for him to get her somewhere safe and leave her there. then he’ll just have to lay low for a while until whatever report she files dies down.
“you’re safe,” he murmurs, hoping it’s the first thing she hears. “you’re alive and you’re safe. nothing’s going to harm you.”
@seesgood
#thread#seesgood#•| the assassin's assistant || sebastian & caroline |•#•| muse || sm |•#is this as good as my first take before I accidentally backed out?#no no it's not#but it'll do#also#so long as you're on this site#so the fuck am i#•| contact || caroline |•
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi! Hope you don’t mind me asking, but I can’t get your red bull au out of my head!!
I was wonder what Lewis would do when he realises George is struggling (if he realises?) Will there be any fluff ? Does Lewis defend George?
<3
God I SO don’t mind anon, I’m gonna end up needing to dedicate part of my authors note to anons who helped me iron out the details on this thing. I always plan better out loud TO someone than in my own head.
Redbull George AU spoilers below! Be warned!
Lewis kinda doesn’t realise till it’s too late. It’s not entirely his fault, for Lewis it’s easy to enjoy this thing he has with George as stress relief. He’s not fighting neck and neck with George directly, he has more gripes with his teammate than him, and they’re both adults, so when Redbull starts to press a thumb down on George, Lewis ignores it. It works for his benefit, the fact that redbull hasn’t learned how to maintain a dynamic between their drivers since Seb and Dan is entertaining. He learned his lesson with Alonso and Nico, now Lewis has Valtteri, who he considers almost a brother at times.
And sometimes it’s fun, when George is riled up and pissy Lewis really gets a real puzzle to unpack. It takes more skill and taunts to get him into an relaxed puddle in Lewis’ bed. Lewis doesn’t think about how much he likes that too hard, chalks it up to liking a good challenge. But that only lasts up to a certain point. Winning championships is Georges dream, and for the past 4 years he’s been SURE that if he gets into the Red bull seat, that’s his ticket to glory, it was a dream of sorts.
But the more the team forces him down to benefit Max, the more the rose tinted glasses slip away. The dream he had is turning sour in front of him and he doesn’t really know what to do about it? Maybe it’s just a hiccup he has to last out. But the more George is forced to hold in, the angrier he gets. As they head toward the summer break Lewis is starting to notice that George doesn’t really relax, even after a couple of orgasms. In the second to last race of the pre break, Lewis watches RB make a strategy call so blatantly favouring it has all of Merc raising an eyebrow. After he and George have sex, he’s staring at George’s lax, bitten up back, thinking about it, and he ends up just asking George “Why are you so committed to driving for them, they clearly put max first?”
George tenses and puffs up like an angry cat, sitting up and getting dressed even when he has to be sore, gritting out a “who the fuck asked you Hamilton”. He looks even more annoyed when Lewis responds that nobody did, but he knows a team punishment when he sees one. George tells him he doesn’t know shit and then he’s marching out of Lewis’ motor home and toward the red bull ones before Lewis can even lazily pull some boxers on. VB probably sees this exchange from his neighbouring vehicle and asks Lewis what happened. When Lewis tells him, he points out that fucking George won’t exactly help him solve his problems. Lewis replies that not fucking him wouldn’t either, but he’s starting to feel a little�� off about the whole thing. He’s never seen George that mad, and this is only as fun as much as both of them enjoy it. He’s happy to be a way George relieves his stress, but he doesn’t want to make him worse.
So Lewis is starting to consider talking to George about it, dispense some older driver wisdom no matter how quickly George tells him to fuck off. He remembers his rookie year at mclaren all too well, but next race George won’t even meet his eye before the race. Fine, it’s not really his problem. Then on track George looks set to win before he basically hands an overtake to Lewis for first, but holds place to stop max getting past him for second or to challenge first. Lewis comes first, George second, Max third. It makes no sense and Lewis is kinda angry at him for it honestly, it’s no fun to win without the adrenaline of fighting for it. On the podium George barely even pretends to take part in the celebration, just takes long pulls of his champagne and bailing off the platform as soon as he can. He’s on his way to find George and yell at him, when he sees George being marched into the Redbull offices by a murderous looking team of higher ups and Max.
Lewis doesn’t see George again till after the summer break. George isn’t even on social media, (lewis found himself checking a couple times, he tells himself it’s just to look for some of Georges notorious shirtless photos, not because he’s worried.) First race back and even under a mask lewis can tell George is pale and exhausted. He wants to ask George what’s wrong but George won’t meet his eye, mumbles about being needed for meetings or debriefs, and just all out avoids Lewis.
Angst! You gotta have a good dose of angst before you can bring the fluff. And there will be fluff, I don’t fuck with unhappy endings, but we have to earn it first ;))
31 notes
·
View notes
Note
fanfic ones:
3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 16, 17, 18, 19 and 20
Sevvie out here making me cry with her awesomeness 😭💛. (Your name keeps autocorrecting to Seb/Sebby and I’m like no stop ✨.)
Answer key:
Kurtbas/glee: 3, 5, 7, 9, 19, 20.
Fanfic ovr: 4, 6, 8, 10, 12-19.
I’d also just like to preface this post by saying that everything that is said beneath this paragraph is my opinion. If you like the fandoms, tropes, characters and ships I don’t like, or vice versa, that’s awesome, and I’m really happy you find enjoyment out of something I personally cannot. But I’m also not looking to have my mind changed, I’m just disclosing what I think and that be all. 💛
3) What is your most popular fanfic?
A glance through the hourglass.
Statistically speaking it’s actually my second most popular, and when I finally post the kurtbas fanfic for the Dalton series it’ll probably end up in third, but it’s the one I get the most interactions with outside of AO3, and tbh as much as I still love my historical fiction fics, I’m much prouder of this one. (Despite the fact it’s two chapters long rn-)
4) Do you write original stories as well?
Uhm, not really? But sometimes when I want to show a fic to someone that doesn’t know I write fanfic, I copy the document, switch up the names and a few plot points, and then show that instead, so I guess in a way that’s somewhat original, but not really. I have had ideas for original stories though. (And the Jacky bio doesn’t count.)
5) What fanfic of yours should everyone have read?
I’m not confident enough to claim anyone should have to read any of my fics, but if you’re a kurtbas shipper and you haven’t read the start of AGTTHG, it would mean the world to me if you did- /hj.
6) What is a fandom will you never write for?
Uhm…I don’t really know. I guess H*rry P*tter, but that’s mainly because the fandom freaks me out and the queen of terfs doesn’t deserve anymore exposure unless it’s negative. (It’s also just not really my thing and the only character I remember liking was Sirius, which I think is basic take?)
7) What is a ship you will never write for?
Seblaine. Really really not a fan of Blaine and I thought watching those two interact was like watching wet cardboard disintegrate, says a lot that Blaine didn’t shake off Seb’s attempts or even disclose that he had a boyfriend when they first met, and I also think Sebastian deserves somebody on par with him mentally and emotionally, which Blaine just isn’t. The only reason why I’ll even write Klaine is if it’s in the context of them being together at the start of a kurtbas fic, and then they break up. So overall anything to do with Blaine, but Seblaine especially.
8) Archive of Our Own, FanFiction.net, Wattpad, Tumblr, etc. which platform do you prefer?
I was introduced to fanfic on FF.net at around the age of 10, I would read vaguely on Wattpad from the age of 12-14, and although not through this account, I’ve been on tumblr since 2015/2016, AO3 was actually the last site I discovered and to start with I found it too complicated to navigate, but I think within the last 5 years it’s definitely become my favourite platform when it comes to fanfic.
9) What are your favorite fanfics?
I don’t think I can pick, I have so many, but I’ll link some of my faves off of the top of my head.
It’s Just Toast. - Strawberrystardust (kurtbas, tw ED)
A Change in the Weather. - Cacophonylights (Kurtbas)
Losing Faith. - Chereche (platonic Furt)
Funny How the Heart Can Be Deceiving. - Loredi_english (kurtbas, somewhat anti-Blaine)
Mosaic. - Fangirlingfanatic (tw for like, everything, kurtbas)
Strangers. - Amadeuplove (kurtbas)
You Ever Come Back (I’ll be Waiting). - Nellywrites (Seb’s homelife)
Of Wine and Coffee. - Fanficloverme96 (kurtbas)
I also recommend you read anything from @binch-i-might-be because she’s one of the most talented authors I’ve ever had the luxury of meeting/befriending. (Historical fiction)
10) How do you stay motivated to finish what you've started?
I just try not to pressure myself, and I keep myself updated in the media. If I’m feeling a little downbeat when it comes to Sebastian ideas, I’ll listen to his songs or watch his clips from glee, sometimes I’ll just read fanfic about him or listen to the playlists I have centred around him, I just surround myself with things that feel like ‘Bas. If I’m feeling motivated enough to write something away from my main projects, whether that be kurtbas, childhood Seb (lots of this rn), or even Niff, then I will write whatever I’m feeling. I just let my emotions and mind create, and I have no apologies. Updates will come when they come, and when I’m happy with them, which has helped me wonders.
I used to have a very unhealthy relationship with writing fanfic, to the point where I would bang out a 1500-2500 word chapter within an hour, check it over once, and just throw it up there. This really burnt me out because I stopped writing for fun, and more so for reader satisfaction, and I ended up loathing everything that I wrote because I knew I could do better, but was still so desperate for interaction that I almost didn’t care. Now my chapters are 7000+, carefully edited, sometimes even beta read, and I’m much happier with them, and I’m a lot less concerned with reader statistics, so when I do get wonderful comments or DMs, it makes them feel even more deserved. Now that I’ve found a system that is writer friendly to me, I find that I haven’t lost interest in my projects because I’m actually enjoying what I do, even if updates are separated by months. I’m proud of my work, and I think that makes all the difference.
So to shorten that, my advice would be to consume the media as much as you want, and be kinder to yourself about writing/updating.
11) What's your longest fanfic?
I don’t really have an answer because I’m not too far into the game again where I have a lot of finished works to compare this too, but my chapters are now always 8000 words+, so hopefully soon I’ll have an answer.
12) Do you want to break your readers' heart or make them laugh?
I like to do both. I like to make my readers feel all sorts of things, but I would say I’m more tailored towards angst/Hurt + Comfort. And I’ve actually made @ultravioletmorning--light cry before, which I’ve been told is a tough job.
13) What is your planning process?
I used to have a very strict planning process. I would write a short summary for each chapter and make sure I knew what went where, and then I would write it out of order. Now I just have an overall direction of where I want the fic to go, a few key plot points that need to happen to move the story along, and some key characters listed. I have two new multi-chapter fics in the works, both kurtbastian, which will be fully written, or at least over halfway, before I start publishing them, just to make sure I’m as devoted to them as I am to AGTTHG, but this is new waters for me, so I wouldn’t class it as my current planning process.
14) What have others criticized about your fanfic?
I’m very lucky to have not received much criticism, and if I have it has always been kind and constructive, but I would say the concern I get the most of would be my wordiness. Sometimes I talk a little too much, and this shows through my description. I often struggle to find the balance between ‘too much’ and ‘not enough’, but I am thoroughly working on it.
16) Do you use sentence starters, writing prompts and/or fandom headcanons for your fanfics?
Very rarely, but sometimes I’ll see HC’s or sentence starters that I like, and I’ll see what I can work with.
17) Do you use/follow advice from writing blogs posts?
I do have a writing board on Pinterest that I will use mostly for synonyms, but those are posts from all sorts of blogs and creators, so I couldn’t pinpoint exactly who I follow and why.
https://pin.it/4AHUXkh here’s is the link to that board.
18) What is your favorite writing prompt?
19) Dead or overused tropes?
20) Can we get a list of all of your current available fanfics?
Absolutely!
Progressive Dynamics. - Historical Fiction.
A Few Firsts of Many. - Historical Fiction.
To Split a Bond in Three. - Historical Fiction.
A Glance Through the Hourglass. - Glee.
Family, and where we find it. - Glee.
I also have a Google doc, over 40k words long, all about Sebastian and what I picture his family to be like. In this doc I cover everything from his parents and how they met, to Sebastian’s childhood and his coming out story, and then to how I envision Kurt and Sebastian reconciling after Kurt graduates. The latter point is in the midsts of being turned into a fanfic, which will belong to the same series as the above fic listed.
#sev my angel how are you?? we miss you :(#ask bea#sev 💚#fanfic related#fanfic asks#writing struggles#anti blaine anderson#anti seblaine#lol Blaine Anderson#glee#kurt hummel#sebastian smythe#kurtbastian#bea’s fanfics#Bea’s beloved besties
11 notes
·
View notes
Note
“jfc” please :)
wip folder game!
lmao okay this is an idea i had that i never got around to actually writing anything for EXCEPT these two, very short snippets of conversations. also i looked at the doc a few days ago and i was like huh. i was really going through Something here, wasn't i? anyways, have literally ever single word that's in the doc PLUS a scene that i literally just banged out bc i thought abt it for the first time in ages and couldn't NOT write it:
(charles is sad and lonely, drinking a lot and sleeping around. seb is divorced, also a little sad maybe. they help each other, in the end.)
“I’m good at it,” Charles says after a while, with a faint shrug. “I like being good at things.”
Seb hums thoughtfully, carding his fingers through Charles’ hair where his head is resting in his lap. “You don’t always have to be good at things, you know,” he says, after a while. “Sometimes you’re allowed to just… Be.”
-
“What are you sad about?” Seb asks, frowning slightly.
“Nothing,” Charles says, a sad smile appearing on his face. There’s a pause, and then, “Everything.”
(note: this is just. so much sadder than what i usually write??? ALSO, there was this scene, that i've been thinking about for ages but never got around to writing before RIGHT NOW. it's set like. early-ish in the fic. this is what it says in the outline about it: "couple of races into the season, seb gets roped into an afterparty by? daniel probably? he ends up sitting at a table with alex, george and lando for some reason." and then here is the scene lol:)
“Oh, here we go again,” Lando says, rolling his eyes. He’s looking at something in the distance, Seb can’t really tell what it is. The other two turn around at his comment, and seem to spot it immediately.
“That might be a new record, actually,” George says, eyebrows raised. He turns back around, takes another sip of his drink. “Honestly, I’m kind of impressed.”
Next to Seb, Alex hums, almost disapproving. “I don’t know,” he says, frowning slightly. “It’s a bit much, don’t you think? Like, do you think we should be worried about him?”
Seb’s still got no idea what they’re talking about. He looks back at where they’d been looking earlier, but it’s dark and there are so many people, he can’t figure out where exactly he’s supposed to be noticing something.
“Over by the bar,” George says, picking up on his confusion.
Focusing in on the bar and the crowd in front of it, Seb still doesn’t really get what he’s supposed to be seeing. Most of the people seem to be queuing up for another drink, there’s one couple making out, but Seb doesn’t recognize any of them, and then next to the couple there’s-
Well, there’s Charles. He’s dressed in a white shirt, the top three or four buttons open, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and leaning against the bar with a drink in his hand. He’s talking to someone, a tall guy with dark hair and broad shoulders. Seb frowns slightly, still not fully understanding what exactly it is the others are talking about.
“It’s been like this after practically every race this season,” Alex says. He’s looking at Seb, clearly trying to get him up to speed.
“Not just after every race, either,” Lando adds, with a slight scoff. “On the off-weekends too, he’s been moving mad.”
George laughs. “The Mad Mover of Monaco,” he says, grinning.
Alex laughs too, but then stops abruptly when he looks at Seb again. “Oh, shit, we’re not-” he says, stumbling a bit over his words. He’s probably mistaken Seb’s confused frown for one of disapproval. “Listen, we’re not slut shaming him, or anything, it’s-”
“What’s that?” Lando asks, eyes narrowed.
“What’s what?”
“Slut shaming.”
“Uh, it’s when-” Alex starts, and then stops, seemingly trying to find the right words. “Like, when someone’s, uh- you know, it’s-”
“It’s when you shame someone for being a slut,” George says, cutting Alex off.
“Ah, right,” Lando says. He looks like he considers that for a few seconds, and then: “No, that’s definitely what I’m doing, then.”
“Lando!” Alex exclaims. He reaches out, across George who’s sat between them, and slaps at Lando’s arm. “He’s our friend-”
“Yeah,” Lando says, shrugging. “Our friend, who’s being a slut.”
Alex slaps him again at that, and then Lando starts reaching to slap back.
“Alright!” George, who’s quite literally stuck in the middle, says. He pushes at both of them to get them to stop. “Settle down you lot. You-” he points to Lando, “are just jealous because you’ve got no game of your own, and you-” he turns towards Alex, “are just stupidly in love with your girlfriend, and don’t remember what it’s like to be single. So give it a rest, and let Charles enjoy himself. Jesus.”
They’re both quiet for a bit, staring at George. Then-
“I am not stupidly in love-”
“Hey! I’ve got game, what the hell-”
Seb kind of tunes out, after that. He’s still not sure he’s completely understood what the hell they’re talking about, but his eyes drift back to where Charles is standing at the bar. This time, he notices more details. The way Charles is leaning into the guy, who’s got his hand resting lightly against Charles’ thigh. The way Charles is smiling; different from the smiles Seb’s used to seeing on him. It’s almost- coy. But it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. It’s nothing too obvious, really, but now that Seb’s looking for it, it’s obvious that Charles is flirting.
A weird feeling settles in the pit of Seb’s stomach. He tears his eyes away from the scene, focuses back in on Alex, George and Lando, just in time to see Lando getting up from his seat.
“I’ll prove it,” he’s saying. “Just watch me, I’ve got more game than the both of you combined.”
Alex scoffs at that. “Going up to girls and just saying hey guess what, I’m an F1 driver does not count as having game.”
Lando flips him off, and then he’s heading into the crowd. George grins, says something that Seb doesn’t quite catch but that he thinks was probably something along the lines of Oh, I’ve gotta see this, before he follows him.
That leaves just Seb and Alex at the table. Alex turns back to Seb, shoots him a smile like, sorry about those guys.
“Seriously though,” he says, “about Charles, it’s- I don’t care, how many people he sleeps with. It’s just- he doesn’t really seem like himself, lately. You know?”
Seb hums. He doesn’t, really. He hasn’t been around Charles all that much, this season, but then, that itself might be a sign that something’s different. Usually he sees him around the paddock and has a chat, a catch up. And last season Charles would text him a lot, asking for advice, or just random things about life at Ferrari. There’s not been any of that this season though, Seb realizes. He’s been too caught up with his own stuff to really notice.
“I’m sure he’s fine, though,” Alex says, smiling. “I should go check that Lando and George haven’t gotten themselves into any trouble.” He scoots out of the boot, and waves goodbye to Seb as he goes.
Alone, Seb’s eyes travel back to the bar. There’s no sight of Charles or the guy he’d been talking to.
#tell me why i've been kicking and screaming trying to work on my actual wip for days and then i just bang out almost 1k of a dumb scene#for a fic idea that's pretty much abandoned. in like less than an hour. tell me why that is!!!#anyways thank u anon!! i hope this uh. makes sense at all lol. and that you enjoy!!#ask#also side note. 95% of the time i don't really. care abt george or lando so like SORRY if the characterization is off. they are just there#for comedic relief:)#wip talk#anon
11 notes
·
View notes
Note
f1 love island au! here are my thoughts, for anybody it may concern: in my opinion some of the initial couples would be pierre and charles, lewis and valtteri, lando and george, maybe daniel and daniil? pierre and charles think they're in it for the long haul, lewis isn't so keen at the beginning but is actually warming up towards valtteri, lando and george tell themselves they're happy together even though there is obviously some chemistry missing and daniel thinks daniil is a chill guy, nothing to complain about, so he's up for staying in a couple with him. THEN max comes in. daniel is obviously attracted to him but thinks it's easier to stay in a couple with daniil than risk it with a guy who seems so unpredictable, fiery, without filter, is so so young! lando at this point noticed that something is missing with george, feels like there's something about max (there is, but only platonic, they only figure that out later though). so lando and max couple up. daniel feels weird about it but tells himself he's jealous of max because daniel and lando sometimes flirted. next seb and maybe alonso come on, don't ask me about the logistics, and they couple up? seb really isn't happy. seb immediately has his eyes on lewis (he's gorgeous! and you best believe lewis is the best dressed islander, always!) but doesn't take it further than friendly chatting because lewis seems to really like valtteri. THEN alex comes on and charles, who has been pretty much married up with pierre the entire time, is starting to question things for the first time. the more he talks to alex, the more he falls for him (alex is so funny, down to earth, humble, cute), alex feels bad for pierre but follows his heart and chooses to couple up with charles. pierre is heartbroken. at some point valtteri decides to leave the villa because he realizes he still has feelings for his ex, CUE seb making his move on lewis and lewis would've never thought he would go for a guy with shabby hair and ugly cargo shorts but he's constantly blushing around seb, he can't help it, what's going on?? max is still with lando, he finds himself watching daniel more and more but doesn't think he stands a chance because daniel is so HOT and FUNNY and charming and he's so perfect? so they also only have friendly chats. a bit too friendly? lando gets suspicious, daniil notices, everybody can tell except for max and daniel. then carlos comes on. maybe he picks daniel to couple up with? because pretty boys with curly hair are his type. max is fuming with jealousy and lando has yet to pick up his jaw from the floor from when carlos walked in. max suddenly gets very possessive about daniel, lando is suddenly flirting more than he has in his entire life (he needs to get carlos!!! he physically aches for carlos!! this is what was missing !!!). by some miracle pierre hasn't been sent home yet, mostly he was in friendship couples after alex and charles coupled up, sometimes he really tried but it didn't work (with daniil maybe?) but then yuki comes on. little, sweet baby yuki. pierre tries to tell himself he's not interested but he literally has heart eyes for yuki. one morning he tries to bring yuki a drink which ends in yuki showing him exactly how to do it, so it turns out perfect! from then on yuki is the one making pierre drinks (and food). anyways probably some drama ensues, because what would love island be without drama, like charles getting sent home to keep things interesting! and sometimes he wasn't sure if alex liked him back as much as charles likes alex, but alex packs his bags to go home with charles with no hesitation as if that's the logical conclusion. "why wouldn't i? i sucked you off in the same room the others were sleeping in, what more of a love confession do you need?" and charles is blushing, tears in his eyes, he wants this idiot for life. lando and carlos win love island, with max and daniel being a problematic second, seb and lewis third (they get married like one year after getting out of love island, a big reunion for everyone!) <333
.
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
Nomen
Chapter VIII - Cesare and Lucrezia's theme
CW: hints at sex, but nothing explicit. If you want to know more, please consult 'About Nomen'
WC: around 2200 words
Previous Chapter : VII - Be My Mistake (No. 1 Party Anthem)
Next Chapter : IX - Evermore
Masterlist
************************************************************************************************************************************************
February 28, Monday, 8:37 (present time)
“Good morning My Lady. It’s a sunny Monday morning, and as usual your parents are at work, so I thought now would be the perfect time to bring you the new file that arrived last night.”
“Seb, you always speak too much when I wake up. Also, keep the curtains closed.”
“Forgive me, My Lad-“
“I think we’ve officially past the point of you calling me ‘My Lady’, don’t you agree?”
“You’ll be happy to know I have a feeling that with this new file I could find a name to use. In any case, shall we talk about what happened?”
“Well, I don’t think we have to. I wanted that, you clearly did too. I was surprised you acted so swiftly but I got what I needed so I guess it’s fine.”
“So you don’t need to put boundaries, yell at me for taking advantage of your weakness…?”
“Why should I? I told you, I wanted to sleep with you. I may even want to do that again sometimes.”
“Do you now?”
We agreed that sex was just a way for me to release tension and to be able to feel something again, physically and emotionally. With my great relief, I realized what I felt for him wasn’t pure love, but mostly lust. I needed love, I was craving it after losing both my brother and who I thought was the love of my life, but Sebastian wasn’t the right person to fill that void. He had been there for me when I was at my lowest, helping me in picking up the pieces of my heart and glueing them back together, making me face my new life and responsibilities, but I couldn’t let myself fall for that. Whatever he did, he had done it only because he wanted to raise my soul and cook his perfect meal: I knew this from the beginning and so I started to react against his will by doing the only thing I knew how to do perfectly, that was hiding my anger and all of my deepest feelings. Sure, there were times when my emotions resurfaced, and Sebastian had witnessed some of those moments, but most of the time I was perfectly collected and I scarcely ever surrender to his devious words. I also knew he thought that sex was the easiest way to finally break me and make me turn into a pawn in his hand, but he overlooked the fact that I wasn’t going to give him my heart. He could have my body, my soul, maybe even my mind, but he would never get my heart. That was of the promises I made to Cesare, one I wasn’t going to break. When the illness of my brother was starting to deteriorate his body, he made me promise three things. First, to make a contract with Sebastian only if I was desperate and willing to give up any chance at happiness, and I did that. Second, to never lose myself in hatred, rage and revenge, because I was kind and to him that was my greatest virtue. I’ve never been able to tell him that I wasn’t the kind angel he depicted me to be, that I was naive and ignorant more than tender. I wanted to refuse to agree to that because I felt like I was conning him, but I couldn’t bring myself to interrupt him that day. I tried to live up to his standards, but the sense of guilt clouded over my head never left since the day he died. The third promise I made that day was to never give my heart to someone that wasn’t willing to give his, and Sebastian probably didn’t even have one. With Tomoe, despite all the pain of my one-sided love, I had found enormous joy in the simple act of loving him. Just seeing him made me smile, every time he looked at me I felt so full of love, like my heart was on the point of burst. With Sebastian instead I felt fire. My stomach would drop whenever he moved around me, caressed me, protected me. However, after our night together I realized that there was nothing else I wanted from him if not physical contact. When I felt his skin under my skin I felt secure, protected, confident, and that brought me to the point of shivering and desiring him, but that wasn’t falling in love at all. That was just a lethal mixture of desire, empowerment, loneliness and apathy that I was trying to cure in the easiest and quickest way. It took me some time to figure it out, but at least I was sure my heart and my promises were safe, so I decided to surrender again and give in to his touch.
"I do."
************************************************************************
“Roni! Please pick up your package from the table and set it, lunch is almost ready!”
“Yes, sorry mum, I forgot to put it away after the courier arrived.”
“By the way, what have your bought?”
“Ehm…books, as always.”
“Well, you better tidy up and reorganize your library, there’s no room anymore! If you’re going to continue buying new books at this frequency, we’ll have to move to a public library.”
“Yeah, I know, but you know readin-“
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. I adore that you love reading so much but really, you’ll have to control yourself. Also, how much are you spending on it? Where do you find the money? You don’t have a job and we don’t give you so much money…books are expensive afterall.”
“Don’t worry mum, I share them with Irene, so we can both save money. And I save a lot of my money gifts from Christmases and birthdays.”
“If you say so.”
“Well, I live with you and you know I don’t get out much, it’s not like I can sell drugs on the streets.”
“I know that, but I also noticed you staring a lot from the window and spending a lot of time on your phone on the terrace.”
“What is this have to do with my money?”
“I don’t know, you just seem…off. Like something’s wrong. You want to talk with me about something…?”
“I swear I’m fine, mum. I’m just a young person stressed because of university stuff. Don’t worry.”
Despite my best, reassuring smile, my mum wasn’t convinced at all. But of course I couldn’t just tell her I wasn’t really her daughter and I received files about my past, present and future life almost every week. I couldn’t even tell her I was managing industries after my late brother or that I had a demon sleeping in my room every night because sometimes I had nightmares. I tried to involve her with Tomoe once, talking to her about this gorgeous character from a book I read and that was painful enough. She just can’t be a part of that side of my life, but if she was noticing something I had to be careful.
************************************************************************
“Do you think this file is a fake one?”
“I’m sure it’s real.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Because your brother received it too. It had some differences though.”
“Really? Can I read his too?”
“I’m sorry My Lady, that file was destroyed with the others at the villa, in England.”
“Yes, right, I forgot. But you read it, didn’t you? You can tell me the differences.”
“Before I tell you, you already knew that your brother was actually adopted by your biological parents because a member of the society they knew died and left his only newborn son behind, am I correct?”
“Yes, he told me. And he also told me that it’s likely that I have another biological brother somewhere, but he didn’t have any clue about that, it was just a hunch.”
“Indeed. This is the file that gave him the hunch.”
“Oh. I see. Well then, where are the differences?”
“Actually, it’s more like an extension of the report. For starters, there are more details about your life.”
“Oh, yeah. Can’t wait to marry someone he disliked and die a widow, while leaving behind my child. Another file actually gave me a similar scenario now that I think about it.”
“But that’s not the main change. His file finished the moment the protagonist picks up a different way to do things, he chooses a sort of demonic path.”
“And Cesare told me that’s where you came along.”
“Yes, the file doesn’t mention me directly, but your brother thought it was referring to me, to our contract. All that comes later though…it wasn’t written there.”
“You mean…my brother can…”
“It could be a possibility for him to come back in this world, almost as written in this new file.”
I thought I would never be happy again. When I lost my Cesare, not even a year after losing Tomoe, I was sure that I’d lost everything. I was the shell of myself because I strongly believed nothing had sense anymore and living wasn’t something I was fond of, to begin with. My brother was my light. We’ve been together for a short time, but he showed me a world I loved living in. There were times when I questioned the importance of my life. I had all the essentials, I was lucky to have my loving parents, my two best friends, Irene and Elisa, I was a good student, I had a roof over my head and I wasn’t starving. Yet nothing seemed to be enough. I was being crushed between the awareness of my fortunes and the indifference I felt in front of them. I was empty, nothing mattered because I felt like I didn’t matter. I was loved, but whenever someone did something to demonstrate affection, I always ran away. I wanted to be invisible, but I craved for someone to notice me and appreciate me from a distance. I felt trapped in myself. My head was always too loud and too silent at the same time. I never listened to myself because I was afraid of thinking and realizing I was just a spoiled child who deserved nothing and that brought me to waste my time in books and characters, crying about their stories because I wasn’t able to focus on me. I wasn’t living, I was just existing and nobody knew about what was going on inside my head. No one knew I wanted to erase myself but felt too coward to actually do that. I used to think I didn’t even deserve to die and suffer because there was nothing wrong with my life, I wanted to find something to make my life miserable enough to gain the right to go away without leaving a trace. But again, I was a coward and I never did nothing that would be considered wrong: always obedient, always clean, never smoked, never drank, no wrong companies. I wanted to be part of something great and do absolutely nothing to change myself. I was lazy and demanding, stupid and arrogant, ignorant and judging. I was lost. But he saved me. Cesare gave me something no one else had given me: a purpose. Yes, I would’ve never been able to do something that wasn’t premeditated by who-knows-who, and I was pissed when I discovered it, but at the same time I was relieved: I had a role. I was going to fit in. I always felt like I was born to obey, my father used to say I would make a perfect soldier, and Cesare confirmed that in a way. I had to accept the files and I was almost happy to do that. Almost. In fact, I was still a demanding, spoiled child who hated impositions. I was a living contradiction and aware of it. However, Cesare embraced it all. He was both family and a stranger at my eyes and after receiving my first file I decided to let go of all of my fears and doubts and I fell in love with him. Obviously not in a romantic way, even though we joked about our peculiar kind of bond a lot, but I did love him. His kind and warm smile guided me out into the world and he never failed to make me feel better, happier, loved, seen. That damn winter day, when he died, a part of me died with him but now, this new file brought me hope. I thought I would never be happy again. But maybe, just maybe, I was going to get another chance.
************************************************************************************************************************************************
Author's note: To be fair, this is a prelude to next chapter, that is one of the reasons why the song mentioned in the title doesn't compare in text. The other reasons are: it's an instrumental song, so there are no lyrics to begin with, and I wanted to try to insert a song without mentioning it in a dialogue or thoughts. It will happen again in the future chapters. As I was saying, the next chapter will include even more about Cesare and Lucrezia's relationship in a way, but her recollection of memories about him starts now, with the appearance of this new file that will be 'studied' more in future (a little hint can be seen in the tags). The song, that I'll link right below, is taken from The Borgias' soundtrack, a show I loved so much and has inspired part of this ff (Please search for the main theme of this show, it's truly amazing!) As always, thank you for reading!
#nomen#ff#fanfic#cesare#cesare x lucrezia#the borgias#sebastian x oc#sebastian michaelis#kuroshitsuji#original character#black butler#mdzs#Spotify
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
I think the thing with Daniel is he probably wouldn’t come back to f1 unless he could get a competitive seat (which I do kind of understand because once you’ve experienced like competing and winning in f1, I don’t think just racing for the sake of it holds the same sort of appeal as it might for others - I feel like Seb has talked about this as well) whether or not he deserves it is another question idk. That being said I don’t think he necessarily expects that he’ll be able to get a seat like that and the more I’ve heard him talk recently (and even at the last race last year) he seemed kind of content/okay with it being his last race and not coming back. I guess we’ll see 🤷🏻♀️
Also just on the other topic of daniel discussion, in 2020 (from memory) he was one of the first and also more vocal supporters of Lewis and the issues/causes he was pushing/addressing (idk if that’s the right way to word it?) like he wasn’t doing anything special or like leading the way or anything but I do remember him at least being vocal. I kind of wonder where that has gone because (at least to me) it didn’t come across as performative at the time and did feel genuine.
Oh yeah-- I don't blame him for not wanting to just race for the sake of racing, especially as F1 keeps adding to the calendar and schedules races like complete fucking assholes like the toll that takes has to be tremendous. And like I think it's so valid to be like "You know what, if I'm not at the front, it's not worth it to ruin my mental health and my physical health".
I'll admit, I don't really remember much of 2020 ha so I'm glad you brought it up!! I think sometimes for me, it was really disappointing re: Daniel because he'd be so supportive of Lewis but then turn around and be like "I don't watch the news, it bums me out" (or however he said that) because like you said, it seemed genuine and I'll take occasional but genuine support/activism over performative shit any day, you know?
sksksk also i'm going to take a second and say this now that I've calmed down re anons earlier today: I know i've been accused of being horribly biased against daniel but the reality here is that i have really complex feelings about him (like i have with many drivers) and i am above all else a hater who bitches so i can see how people lose their patience with me but like ask my friends because I've been on a similar bend with Marcus Armstrong all week so 💀💀💀 i am just a human, i will always have my biases. i am always going to strive to have good conversations with each of my anons, whatever their opinions are (obviously if I agree with an anon, that's going to look different than if i don't).
anyways, thank you for your perspective <3 i really appreciate it
1 note
·
View note
Last Seen Blogs
kota-is-tired
Kota
quackinthebox
grape jelly stain
soulcolider
ArtBy SoulcolideR
hazbinvoxtech
Vox (CEO)
