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#fiona widdershins x violet baudelaire

agaypanic · 1 year

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First off your username is a whole ass mood, also, could I request a fic with Klaus Baudelaire? Their on the Qeequeg and reader gets jealous of Fiona and her flirting with klaus. I’m a whore for Klaus Baudelaire

Guess (Klaus Baudelaire X GN!Reader)

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Request Something!

Summary: Y/n has been with the Baudelaires since they showed up on Monty’s doorstep. When they board the Queequeg, Y/n can’t help the jealousy overcome when Fiona gets a little too close to Klaus.

A/N: I can’t remember the exact plot of the grim grotto, so in this they’re all just kinda hanging out on the Queequeg ig lol

***

If you had asked Y/n L/n where they saw themself in a few months, they wouldn’t have guessed all the unfortunate events they and the Baudelaires had experienced. Bouncing from guardian to guardian, only tagging along with the Baudelaires because the late Dr. Montgomery Montgomery, their own guardian, was tragically murdered and coincidentally wanted Y/n to be taken care of by the also late Josephine Anwhistle. Being chased down by a homicidal, overgrown theater kid after the Baudelaire fortune.

They also wouldn’t have guessed their current predicament, being stuck in a submarine captained by a teenager. Her name was Fiona Widdershins. She had become captain of the Queeqeug ever since her stepfather got a distress call from a manatee. She was looking for a sugar bowl, the same one that the Baudelaire’s former guardian Esme Squalor was after.

She was also very captivating, especially to a certain Baudelaire. And it pissed Y/n off.

Klaus wasn’t theirs; they knew that. Y/n was constantly reminded of that. But watching as he and Fiona worked closely together to locate the sugar bowl, flirty remarks from her every now and then, Y/n couldn’t stop the jealousy from overcoming them.

“He doesn’t even know her,” Y/n muttered as she watched the two laugh at a joke from afar.

“You know,” Y/n was startled by Violet’s sudden presence beside them, “You could tell him how you feel. It would be better than moping around, watching the two of them.”

“Absolutely not.” Y/n shook the ridiculous idea away. “That would end in disaster.”

“How so?”

“When Klaus rejects me-”

“He won’t.”

“Fine. If he rejects me, we’ll still be stuck together in a submarine until God knows when. And the situation’s awkwardness would be so suffocating that I would jump out into the sea to escape it.”

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic.” Violet laughed at the visual of Y/n’s words. “Klaus won’t reject you, Y/n. I know it.”

“Then why is he flirting with Fiona right in front of us like that?”

“He probably doesn’t see it as flirting, just regular conversation. Klaus may be book smart, but he’s not exactly versed in things like relationships.”

Y/n knew this was true. They had known the Baudelaires long enough to know that they weren’t very experienced when it came to romantic feelings. Most of the experience they did have was from the people they had encountered when their unfortunate events had first started to occur.

“Whatever, I’m still not gonna tell him.”

“Tell who what?” Y/n was again startled by another Baudelaire sibling, Klaus. It seemed that Fiona had gone to steer the submarine in the needed direction, because she was out of the room.

“Actually, we were talking about-” Y/n put their hand over Violet’s mouth to stop her from exposing them.

“Nothing!” Y/n had said that louder than they intended to. They cleared their throat. “We weren’t talking about anything.”

Klaus gave Violet a look. Y/n couldn’t decipher what the look meant, he looked confused, but there was some kind of message in his eyes. Violet apparently knew the message because she made up some excuse to leave.

“I’ll go check on Sunny.” She left quickly, leaving Klaus and Y/n alone in the room.

“Shouldn’t you go back to Fiona?” Y/n immediately hit themself mentally for the question. Why did they feel the need to bring Fiona up now that she and Klaus had finally taken a break from flirting with each other?

“Why would I go back to Fiona?” Klaus looked even more confused. Y/n couldn’t help rolling their eyes.

“Why wouldn’t you? You two were flirting and close together so much that I’m half surprised you didn’t start kissing right there.” Why was Y/n digging themself into an even deeper hole?

Klaus laughed.

Why the hell was he laughing?

“Y/n, are you jealous?” He asked, looking intently at them. They averted their eyes, knowing that looking at him would reveal everything. They didn’t feel like jumping out of the submarine right now.

“That’s absurd.” They scoffed. “Public displays of affection are just disgusting, that’s all.” Klaus laughed again.

“Disgusting? Really?” He took Y/n’s hands in his, making them look at him. “Y/n, there was nothing affectionate about my conversations with Fiona.”

“Maybe not on your side, but she seemed to think differently.”

“Why do you care so much?”

“I don’t want to see some girl flirting with the guy I like. Is that such a crime?” Y/n started punching themself on the inside again. Klaus looked pleasantly surprised.

“Last time I checked, it’s not.” Y/n couldn’t understand why he was being so cheeky. “If it makes you feel any better, though, I have it on good authority that the guy you like isn’t interested in Fiona.”

Oh.

“Oh, um… Is the guy I like interested in anyone?” Y/n asked. They had a feeling where this was going, but you could never be too sure about these kinds of things. Klaus nodded.

“Yes, he seems to like a particular someone.”

“And that is?”

Klaus moved closer to Y/n, leaning down. Their lips were so close to touching yet so far.

“Guess.”

#klaus baudelaire #klaus baudelaire x reader #asoue x reader #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #a series of unfortunate events x reader #agaypanic

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aseriesofhyperfixation · 4 years

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Thoughts on Kliona and Quiglet as romantic couples?

Well I love Quiglet for sure, they’re one of my favorite Unfortunate Gen ships.

Kliona is one that’s a little weird for me, just because I used to really love it when I first read the books but ever since I got back into ASOUE I haven’t been as big of a fan. Don’t get me wrong, I love both of them so much, and I also think they’re a high quality brotp, I just don’t necessarily see them as romantically as I used to.

Nowadays between Klaus and Fiona I tend to prefer Dunklaus for Klaus’s romance and either Fiodora or Viona for Fiona’s romance.

I do still think that Klaus and Fiona would make a good couple, because I think that they have good nerd chemistry together and I think that’s really cute, I just tend to see them more as friends than as a couple.

Also back on Quiglet, although I do absolutely love them, it’s not the only good romantic ship for either of them. Fun Fact I used to LOVE Dunclet, which I’m really not a huge fan of romantically anymore but do still have respect for. I also just really like Viodora, Viona, and Violet with (Redeemed) Carmelita. With Quigley, I used to really think that he and Fiona would be a great couple (IDK why but in my head plants and maps go hand in hand) and I could also theoretically see him with Carm, (although that would be disastrous in a lot of fun ways) or with Klaus (although I think that would be very stressful for everyone involved). I could also honesty see Quigley being aroace and not really being into relationships at all, at least in theory.

Anyway, I think both ships have their place and I’ve really liked both of them at various points. I don’t necessarily think either of them are superior ships, but I don’t really think any of the ships are superior ships. I think any combination of the kids has fantastic potential in either terms of romance or of friendship, and I have enough respect for all of the Unfortunate Gen to just want them to be happy in whatever possible ship there is.

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meg7lom7ni7c · 3 years

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holy shit they made violet x fiona from asoue real

#violet baudelaire #fiona widdershins #a series of unfortunate events #asoue #lemony snicket #queequeg #violet x fiona #fiona x violet #fiolet #viona

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anotherasoue-blog · 4 years

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Fiona: Hey, you wanna see something spectacular?

Violet: You're gonna point at your face, aren't you?

Fiona: *smirks* Nothing is that spectacular.

#asoue #fiona widdershins #violet baudelaire #violet x fiona #viona #a series of unfortunate events #a series of unfortunate quotes #source: the last of us part ii

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ssadumba55 · 5 years

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Moving On (Klaus Baudelaire X Fem!Reader)

Request: Idk if you’re still doing g requests but could u please do a fic where Klaus gets over Fiona and and falls for the reader (takes place after the series)?

A/N: So I wrote this on my phone which is why it's shorter than normal. My laptop doesn't have wifi so I thought I'd try but I don't think it's really good so I'll type the rest on my laptop and then retype on my phone to post from now on. Anyway I'm really sorry this sucks but I hope it's okay. Enjoy..

It had been years since the series of unfortunate events that had sent Klaus and Violet’s lives into a spiral of confusion and never ending sadness.

The Baudelaires now lived normal, quiet lives raising Kit Snicket’s daughter, Beatrice.

Violet had settled down with a guy she met. It had only taken her a few years to get over Quigley and realize that there was no point in pining over someone who she might never see again.

Klaus had been harder to convince.

“Come on. Just one date with (Y/n). I've talked to her. She's really sweet and I think-”

“Violet.” Her brother snapped, looking up from where he sat next to the window.

Violet bit her lip. She knew that Fiona was probably never coming back. But how was she supposed to explain that to her heartbroken brother? Especially when they've already lost so much?

“Listen.” Violet looked over her shoulder and sat beside her brother. “I know you miss Fiona. I miss Quigley the same way. But Fiona is with her family now. She's in a better place. So is Quigley. It's time we moved on.. If you don't like (Y/n), you don't have to see her again. But don't hold back because of Fiona. She wouldn't want you to sit around here waiting for her.”

Klaus raised his head slightly. He knew his sister was right, of course. And how bad could one night with (Y/n) be?

It turns out, not bad at all. By the end of the night, Klaus was absolutely smitten with you. But he was still hesitant.

“I'm not here to replace Fiona.” You told him as the two of you sat, looking up at the stars.

Klaus gave you a questioning look and you smiled sheepishly.

“Violet told me. I think it's sweet. I don't want to replace her. If she ever did come back, I'd move aside. But in the meantime… I'm not asking for what you feel for her. But don't overlook what's right here.” You explained evenly.

Klaus looked at you, studying you carefully for a moment. Finally, he smiled weakly.

“Thank you, (Y/n).” He could feel his heart lightening.

You took his hand and smiled.

He gripped your hand tight.

“Don't worry about Fiona. I'll be okay… As long as you're here.” He relaxed and you smiled.

You highly doubted he'd be over Fiona anytime soon, but at least you could make the pain a little more manageable.

#klaus baudelaire x reader #klaus baudelaire imagine #klaus baudelaire #a series of unfortunate events #asoue imagines #asoue #asoue netflix #asoue spoilers #violet baudelaire #sunny baudelaire #fiona widdershins #quigley quagmire #violet x quigley #klaus x fiona #klaus x reader

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weirdthoughtsandideas · 5 years

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Could u answer the “Would the Ship work?” For Klaus? If that’s ok

Of course!

Would their ship work?

- Klaus Baudelaire-

Kladora

- I don’t ship Kladora and I never have. But the ship definetly would work. Klaus would research on poetry just to impress Isadora, and Isadora would have a stash of poetry just about Klaus with her all the time.

Dunklaus

- Yeah! I mean, they are both pretty shy and pretty awkward, which would lead to some cute moments. Both of them do research in different ways, and I believe they would really bond over that. Also, Duncan would totally take notes on random things Klaus does.

Klaus x Quigley

- No one really ships this, but I do believe it would work. I love how Klaus just complimented how good of a climber Quigley is. Like, was he checking him out? I think if Klaus could climb, maybe he and Quigley were the ones who would rescue Sunny. And, maybe, just maybe, would the ”very lovely indeed” moment be between them instead.

Kliona

- Well, they do have chemistry in canon but it felt a little forced. Maybe if Captain W*ddersh*t wasn’t around to force them to be together, it would be a little easier. And yeah, he wasn’t around in netflix I hear you say. But in Netflix, there was too little time for them to make me really feel their chemistry. But of course, I do believe the ship would work. But maybe not as fast as in TGG. It would probably take a little longer.

Klaus x Carmelita

- Well, no. Carmelita would insult Klaus too much for him to enjoy her company. Also, Klaus would constantly correct her spelling, which Carmelita would get hella annoyed by.

Klaus x Friday

- Again, with all the others, the age gap is too big. Maybe wait a while until both of them are adults before it could lead to anything. But I don’t think it will.

#isadora quagmire #violet baudelaire #duncan quagmire #quigley quagmire #klaus baudelaire #carmelita spats #fiona widdershins #friday caliban #would their ship work?#kladora #dunklaus #klaus x quigley #kliona #klaus x carmelita

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hitchell-mope · 5 years

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Lemony Snicket descendants au

Mal. Violet (as in her hair in d2 on the isle)

Doug. Klaus (to me Zachary kinda looks a little like Louis)

Dizzy. Sunny

Evie. Fiona

Audrey. Carmelita

Ben. Quigley

Jane. Isadora

Carlos. Duncan

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amr102-art · 5 years

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Idk based on 'It Shoulda Been You' b/c this account is 100% based upon dumb thoughts i have where i connect fun things to my hyper-fixations Anyways it's a fake wedding to get an inheritance b/c the dude has to marry a woman to get it, and i guess Vi and Quigley are just confused and stressed out. So yea strap in for more of the 'I like Musicals and books let's mix them together into an altogether lackluster cocktail'

#dunklaus #isadora quagmire x fiona widdershinns #quiglet #violet x quigley #violet baudelaire #klaus baudelaire #duncan quagmire #isadora quagmire #quigley quagmire #fiona widdershins #isadora quagmire x fiona widdershins #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #asoue au #fiona widdershinns #isadora x fiona #klaus baudelaire x duncan quagmire #ive run out of self respect so here we go

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call-me-ish · 7 years

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asoue fandom opinion survey

i’ve seen some differing opinions on fiona and whether or not to ship her with klaus, so i decided to create a survey to find out what the fandom overall thinks!

take it here

(if you guys enjoy doing this one i might do another opinion survey for lemony, lmk!)

rb to spread the word

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snicketsleuth · 7 years

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Does the sugar bowl contain a horseradish/apple hybrid?

In the last few weeks Daniel Handler has gone on record with this rare reference to a mystery his fans have been debating for years:

Question: So, are there certain answers that haven’t been revealed? Is there an actual answer to what the Sugar Bowl is? Answer: The mystery of the Sugar Bowl is clear enough that one that about reader a year writes me and has figured it out, and that fills me with pleasure. That makes me think it’s not too obscure. If no one ever wrote me about it I would think, “Oh I didn’t do it enough.” But because one person a year who will write me and say, “I figured it out.” The whole answer of the Sugar Bowl is solvable. [A Series Of Unfortunate Questions with Daniel Handler” (Link), Interview of Daniel Handler by Dana Schwartz, 18th of January 2017 for Observer magazine]

This confirmation has set the fandom ablaze. If some fans have figured it out, surely that means one of the fandom’s theories is right. But surely it can’t be one the most popular ones; otherwise Handler would have received a massive amount of letters mentioning the theory, not just one per year. So by deduction we can assume that the most popular theory concerning the sugar bowl’s significance is actually wrong. The question remains: what is the most commonly accepted sugar bowl theory?

We would have to say the Horseradish Hybrid theory is the most widespread within the fandom. Admittedly, it’s very simple and mostly builds up from these lines in the last two books:

Our comrades and our enemies are all after the same thing-the Vessel For Disaccharides. [The Penultimate Peril, Chapter Two]

Ishmael’s fearmongering has stopped work on the passageway, even though we have a plethora of horseradish in case of any emergency. […] We're attempting a botanical hybrid through the tuberous canopy, which should bring safety to fruition despite its dangers to our associates in utero. Of course, in case we are banished, Beatrice is hiding a small amount in a vess— [The End, Chapter Twelve]

The general idea is that Bertrand hid a core of bitter apple (a specimen of the horseradish hybrid experiment) in the Vessel For Disaccharides, more commonly known as the Sugar Bowl.

So today’s theory is going to be a little different. We must present the theory as convincingly as possible, in all fairness… then debunk it.

You’re in for a bumpy ride. Stay with us after the cut.

WHAT THE THEORY ENTAILS:

The entire sugar bowl conspiracy started out soon after Gregor Anwhistle mass-produced deadly fungi to defeat the “villainous” side of the Schism. The bioweapon was effective, but its volatile nature made it impossible to control: releasing it would doom not only the “noble” side of the Schism, but every single human life on Earth as well. For the Medudoid Mycelium to become truly effective, a remedy needed to be created. Whoever controlled both the poison and its secret antidote would acquire dominion over the rest of humanity. Naturally, some voices within V.F.D. argued that such a power should never be in the hands of one person.

Nevertheless, an antidote was eventually found: horseradish was efficient but sadly slow and difficult to produce. Kit Snicket warned Gregor that he was producing deadly fungi far too quickly for V.F.D.’s horseradish factory to catch up; though some volunteers would be able to survive the carnage thanks to their reserves, millions of innocent people would still die if the spores ever escaped. Eventually Kit became fed up with Gregor’s mad scientist ways and sent Captain Widdershins to murder him and burn every single specimen of Medusoid Mycelium still accessible in Anwhistle Aquatics. Fernald somehow got involved in the assassination/arson and his trauma eventually drove him to Olaf’s troupe in retaliation.

But this wasn’t the end of this poisonous plot; it had simply overgone new management. A small batch of Medusoid Mycelium still existed at the bottom of the Gorgonian Grotto, a secret V.F.D. alcove which could only be accessed by submarine and served as an effective quarantine area. In the right amounts, with a more powerful antidote at disposal, everything could proceed as planned. Beatrice and Bertrand Baudelaire were particularly interested. They had already shown their preference for aggressive methods and their affinity for poison when they helped Kit assassinate Count Olaf’s parents. They started experimenting on horseradish samples to isolate the active element which neutralized the Medusoid Mycelium. Genetic manipulations could potentially transfer the antidote to other plants, with more powerful effects and a quicker production rate.

Their stay on the Island was the perfect time to conduct their work: because it was completely isolated from the outside, they could experiment as they pleased. Eventually they did manage to transfer the antidote component to apples, although the genetic changes made them quite bitter. Then they announced their results to the rest of the Islanders and started building a passageway to the Gorgonian Grotto. Ishmael was horrified and conspired with the rest of the Islanders to seize Bertrand and Beatrice’s research. They were subsequently exiled. What Ishmael didn’t anticipate, however, was that Bertrand had hidden a bitter apple core in a Sugar Bowl, which he smuggled onto the boat he had named after Beatrice. He had mostly done this to protect Beatrice and himself from potential fungus infestation, but the affair turned sour when they regained the mainland.

It soon became clear that the grains of the apple core contained within the sugar bowl could be used to replant and mass-produce the antidote. Worse, the “villainous” side of the Schism eventually learned that such a secret antidote existed (although they had no idea what it was), and that a sugar bowl contained it. Bertrand and Beatrice no longer wanted to use the MedusoidMycelium by that point, but the harm was done. Their sugar bowl was eventually lost and both sides of V.F.D. began searching for it. This eventually escalated into a mutual destruction scenario: neither side really wanted to use the MedusoidMycelium, but both sides needed the antidote to protect their own agents if the other side ever decided to use it. After all, neither side could really be sure all deadly specimens had been destroyed.

OBJECTION #1: THE TIMELINE DOESN’T REALLY ADD UP

An important aspect of this theory is the idea that the sugar bowl conspiracy only started after Bertrand’s and Beatrice’s stay on the Island. Given that Beatrice was pregnant with Violet by the end of her tenure as facilitator, it can safely be assumed that Bertrand and Beatrice got shipwrecked after she and Lemony broke up. So, there should be no sugar bowl mentions within the plot before that point.

As we suspected, we are to be castaways once more. The others believe that the island should stay far from the treachery of the world, and so this safe place is too dangerous for us. We will leave by a boat B has built and named after me. I am heartbroken, but I have been heartbroken before, and this might be the bestfor which I can hope. We cannot truly shelter our children, here or anywhere else, and so it might be best for us and for the baby to immerse ourselves in the world. By the way, ifit is a girl we will name her Violet, and ifit is a boy we will name him Lemony. [Chapter Fourteen]

"You drove our parents away?" Violet asked in amazement. "They were very sad to go," Ishmael said. "Your mother was pregnant with you, Violet, and after all of their years with V.F.D. your parents weren't sure they wanted their children exposed to the world's treachery. But they didn't understand that if the passageway had been completed, you would have been exposed to the world's treachery in any case. [The End, Chapter Ten]

But indeed, we see that the sugar bowl was already a big part of V.F.D.’s lore long before Bertrand and Beatrice were an item. There are documents dated from the time Lemony and Beatrice were a couple with a few sugar bowls mentions. They are all included in Lemony Snicket’s un-Authorized Autobiography:

Beatrice and Lemony are still engaged when Olaf frames him for arson. Jacques advises him to flee the country and provides him with a V.F.D. Disguise Kit. Its manual lists the sugar bowl as one of its optional items. He also tells Lemony he will contact Beatrice so she doesn’t believe the horrible things the Daily Punctillo has printed about him.

Lemony attends a V.F.D. meeting with his brother before his departure. Geraldine Julienne has just started leaking the organization’s secrets to the public. One volunteer complains that these disruptions will lead the younger apprentices to forget the “sugar bowl secret”. This happens before Beatrice’s stay on the island because V.F.D. understands Lemony is still alive and the vicinity at that point.

The Vineyard of Flagrant Drapes warns Lemony not to attend the wedding he planned for Beatrice, and that sugar bowls will be provided at his discretion.

These passages seem to indicate that both sides of V.F.D. weresearching for the sugar bowl long before Violet’s conception.

OBJECTION #2: HOW DO WE RECONCILE THIS THEORY WITH ESME’S SIGNIFICANCE?

According to Esme Squalor, V.F.D. did not choose a sugar bowl at random. There is a meaning to its madness.

"Then you know all about the sugar bowl," Esmé said, "and what's inside. You know how important that thing was, and how many lives were lost in the quest to find it. You know how difficult it was to find a container that could hold it safely, securely, and attractively. You know what it means to the Baudelaires and what it means to the Snickets." She took one sandaled step closer to Dewey, and stretched out one silver fingernail-the one shaped like an S-until it was almost poking him in the eye. "And you know," she said in a terrible voice, "that it is mine. " "Not anymore," Dewey said. "Beatrice stole it from me! " Esmé cried. "There are worse things," Dewey said, "than theft." [The Penultimate Peril, Chapter Nine]

…so why would a sugar bowl be a particularly appropriate place to hide a bunch of horseradish? Or an apple core? If she wanted to hide that, Beatrice could have used literally any other recipient on the Island. And we know that a lot of household items end up on its shores with each storm.

Furthermore, Lemony and Beatrice seem to have gone to great pains not only to steal a sugar bowl, but more specifically Esme Squalor’s sugar bowl. Again, the theory doesn’t really explain why Esme’s sugar bowl would be a better hiding place than any other.

But if this were a book about me, instead of about the three children who would soon run into someone they had hoped never to see again, I might pause for a moment and tell you about something I did many years ago, that still troubles me. It was a necessary thing to do, but it was not a nice thing, and even now, I get a small quiver of shame in my stomach whenever I remember it. I might be doing something I enjoy--walking along the promenade deck of a ship, or looking through a telescope at the aurora borealis, or wandering into a bookstore and placing my books on the highest place in the shelf, so that no one will be tempted to buy and read them--when I will suddenly remember this thing I did, and think to myself, Was it really necessary? Was it absolutely necessary to steal that sugar bowl from Esmé Squalor? [The Hostile Hospital, Chapter Six]

When I am able, I go out walking on Briny Beach very early in the morning, which is the best time to find materials important to the Baudelaire case, and the ocean is so peaceful that I feel peaceful, too, as if I am no longer grieving for the woman I love and will never see again. But then, when I am cold and duck into a teashop where the owner is expecting me, I have only to reach for the sugar bowl before my grief returns, and I find myself crying so loudly that other customers ask me if I could possibly lower my sobs. [The Carnivorous Carnival, Chapter Five]

There is also another chronological discrepancy there. Lemony and Beatrice were still in regular contact when they stole the sugar bowl from Esme, so the theft would have to have happened way before she ever set foot on the Island. Her sugar bowl wouldn’t contain anything yet by that point, so one cannot really imagine why Beatrice and Lemony would ever care obtaining it.

And I would hop like nobody has ever hopped before, if I could somehow go back to that terrible Thursday, and stop Beatrice from attending that afternoon tea where she met Esmé Squalor for the first time. [The Hostile Hospital, Chapter Two]

Another issue to consider is that Esme really isn’t that involved in the MedusoidMycelium plotline. We know that Esmé is very shallow, but is she willing to do so much evil just to get a small porcelain recipient back? The theory assumes that Esme only really cares about the recipient, not what’s inside it. But her emotional attachment suggest otherwise: she wants to get back both the sugar bowl and its content. She feels both used to be hers. Otherwise the volunteers would have just changed the recipient and given the sugar bowl back to Esme to prevent her from causing any more trouble.

OBJECTION #3: WOULD THE ANTIDOTE REALLY BE THAT VALUABLE?

We know that a well-rounded antidote already exists: it’s horseradish. Plain old horseradish. And V.F.D.’s horseradish factory on Lousy Lane is still up and running. So evidently the volunteers already possess plenty of antidote to go around. A more powerful antidote would sure be neat, but not that neat. You really must consider the diminishing returns of the entire sugar bowl conspiracy here: the “noble” side of the Schism sure is losing a lot of lives to retrieve something they already have.

One also should wonder why the volunteers who did get their hands on the sugar bowl, even for a short moment, didn’t just… destroy it. Think about it: it would be a smart move. The “noble” side already has plenty of horseradish, and the “villainous” side would lose their chance to acquire the antidote forever. The volunteers would therefore gain a permanent advantage over their enemies. The worst part of it all is that the factory on Lousy Lane is surrounded by trees which produce extremely bitter apples.

Lousy Lane runs through fields that are a sickly gray color, in which a handful of scraggly trees produce apples so sour that one only has to look at them to feel ill. [The Reptile Room, Chapter One]

So, Bertrand and Beatrice have already retrieved their research and duplicated their own antidote. Why are the volunteers still bothering with the sugar bowl, then?

It’s also pretty telling that Olaf and Esme are genuinely surprised to hear samples of the MedusoidMycelium still exist in “The Grim Grotto”.

"What my brother means," Fiona explained, "is that inside this helmet is the Medusoid Mycelium." The Baudelaires gasped and looked at one another in horror, as Count Olaf peered through the helmet's tiny window, his eyes wide beneath his eyebrow. "The Medusoid Mycelium," he murmured, and ran his tongue thoughtfully along his teeth. "Could it be?" "Impossible," Esmé. Squalor said. "That fungus was destroyed long ago." "They brought it with them," the hook-handed man said. "That's why the baby was so sick." "This is marvelous," Olaf said, his voice as raspy and wheezy as if he were poisoned himself. "As soon as you Baudelaires are in the brig, I'm going to open this helmet and toss it inside! You'll suffer as I've always wanted you to suffer." [The Grim Grotto, Chapter Thirteen]

Apparently, they assumed all fungi had been burned down a long time ago. Why are spending so much energy looking for an antidote to a poison which doesn’t exist anymore? That would be the most worthless price imaginable. It’s like finding the vaccine to an imaginary illness.

The villains don’t seem to know what the antidote to the MedusoidMycelium is, but the answer isn’t hard to find. There is a book in the Queequeg’s library to spell it out for you. The relevant information isn’t even coded.

But the middle Baudelaire ignored all of these objects, and picked up Mushroom Minutiae from the floor."This book should have information on the antidote," he said, and turned immediately to the table of contents as Violet carried Sunny through the porthole into the submarine. […] “'As the poet says, ' " Klaus read, " 'A single spore has such grim power / That you may die within the hour. Is dilution simple? But of course! / Just one small dose of root of horse.' " [The Grim Grotto, Chapter Eleven]

This book doesn’t seem that precious to begin with. Anybody with decent detective skills could track it back and figure out what the antidote is on his/her own. Again, both sides of the Schism have gone to a great deal of trouble for nothing. Captain Widdershins clearly doesn’t want the young apprentices under his care to know what the sugar bowl contains, and yet he’s left a book with the very answer readily accessible in the submarine’s library.

"I don't want you to understand," the captain said, putting his arm around her. "That's why I haven't told you why the sugar bowl is so very crucial. There are secrets in this world too terrible for young people to know, even as those secrets get closer and closer. [The Grim Grotto, Chapter Four]

Nice work there, Captain. Your daughter is a mycologist, it’s honestly a wonder she hasn’t already learned what the antidote is by now.

CONCLUSION ON THE HORSERADISH HYBRID THEORY:

We understand why this theory is so popular. We really do. Fans like it for three reasons:

It mostly relies on facts the series has clearly established as canonical.

It gives a sufficiently satisfying reason for both sides of the Schism to care about the Sugar Bowl so much, and the idea that it’s essentially the key to a bioweapon of mass destruction explains why adults within V.F.D. don’t like to talk about it in front of the children.

The final clue is given in the last chapter of the last book (through Beatrice’s entry), which is a nice roundabout way to conclude this narrative, just like the Beatrice mystery which is solved through the last word of the last chapter of the last book.

Unfortunately, we really can’t bring ourselves to agree with the theory when it ignores so many inconsistencies and character motivations. It only looks good on a surface level and crumbles as you go into the vastly finer details of the plot.

We also must consider the (frankly disappointing) possibility that this is indeed the answer Daniel Handler intended, but that he overlooked a lot of chronological issues. But we’ve been writing about the subplots of “A Series Of Unfortunate Events” for a while now, and we believe he gives much more attention to consistency and logic than most readers give him credit for. We must remember he had to rewrite the entire outline of “The Penultimate Peril” because he realized one (one!) line of “The Bad Beginning” might throw off the continuity.

Actually, we’d like to go back to the first passage we analyzed. Although Beatrice hid an antidote inside a “vessel” (there’s no other word in the English language it could possibly be), are we even sure he’s referring to the sugar bowl? “Vessel” can designate a recipient, but it more frequently describes a type of boat. So, all Bertrand’s saying is that she smuggled a bit of antidote inside their boat, which is true since they managed to plant new specimens of bitter apple trees near Lousy Lane. It doesn’t have to mean she hid it inside a sugar bowl. In fact, members of V.F.D. usually use capital letters when they use coded initials (such as “Verbal Fridge Dialog) in their written documents. The dialogs also use initials most of the time. If Bertrand was really writing about the Vessel For Disaccharides, he would be using a capital “V”. But he isn’t. Which suggests that the use of the word “vessel” is just a coincidence (or a clever red herring for the sugar bowl subplot).

I would also like to remark that the “vessel” could be the jar of beans Sunny found aboard the Beatrice.

One of the few things the children had found on board the boat was a large clay jar with a rubber seal, which had been wedged underneath one of the boat's wooden benches. The jar was quite dusty and looked very old, but the seal was intact, a word which here means "not broken, so the food stored inside was still edible." Sunny was grateful for the jar, as there was no other food to be found on board, but she couldn't help wishing that it had contained something other than plain white beans. [The End, Chapter One]

The jar is very old and beans can remain edible a very long time with a properly sealed container. It’s absolutely possible this jar used to contain the apple core Beatrice wanted to smuggle outside the Island. She hid it under the white beans to escape Ishmael’s watchful eyes, and simply put on a new seal when she reached the mainland. The irony being that the beans might also be a hybrid, because they were left inside a sealed container with the antidote for a long time. So, the horseradish component might have contaminated them. So there’s great irony that the search for an antidote becomes a critical plot-point during “The End”, even though a perfectly serviceable antidote is already available inside the Beatrice.

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integrabaudelaire · 6 years

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Things That I Hope To See In ASOUE Third Season

1.- Violet & Quigley kiss interrupted by Lemony

2.- Olaf feeling nervous by the presence of The Man With a Beard But No Hair & The Woman With Hair But No Beard and more informative conversation between this characters.

3.- Lemony writing a letter for his “dear sister” and a scene that show us Kit Snicket in action doing something important. And also Lemony more involved inside the story, I want to see him driving his taxi following Kit’s taxi and offering his taxi to the Baudelaires after Deweys’s death.

4.- The White-Faced Women leaves Olaf and a little clue of their backstory

5.- MORE KITLAF REFERENCES

6.- Fernald’s backstory why his stepfather is anger with him? how he lost his hands? and more Fernald & Fiona moments. And also Fernald genuinely concerned about Sunny’s life, and his debate between saving Sunny or obeying his boss, and finally he leaves Olaf

7.- More moments between Esmé & Carmelita like mother and daughter

8.- Captain Widdershins saying that he wants Klaus married with Fiona and Violet with Fernald LOOOOOOL, and also Fiona x Klaus moments.

9.- A shot of a dying Sunny, show us her pale face and her difficult breathing, I really want to cry with this scene. And also cry when Violet and Klaus finding the cake that Sunny cooked for Violet’s birthday. I want this scene to be fucking sad

10.- A clue of what it is the Great Unknown, is it The Bombinating Beast?

11.- A hostile meeting between Kit and Olaf before the end, I want that someone who has never read the books to be surprised when the end comes.

12.- MORE FLASHBACKS

13.- Esmé’s tiny bikini ¡yas!

14.- One (1) bed in the hotel room of Charles and Sir (if you know what I mean) and they will take their hands when the fire in the hotel happens.

15.- The conversation about Olaf’s parents, please this conversation must be more explicit. PLEASE I need more information about that night at the Opera

16.- I want to see Carmelita crying when Olaf pushes her down to take the harpoon gun. she did not expect that from her “Countie”

17.- I want the Dewey’s death to be very explicit.

18.- Ishmael looking like person from the middle east, I imagine Ishmael like a wise and matey old man... apparently

19.- The references to the Bible when the snake gave the apple to Violet. I want this scene to be very slow.

20.- More conversation between Kit and Olaf, I want Kit wakes up soon and they talking when Olaf is in the cage and he tempt to the Baudelaires to they free him. I want to see Kit and Olaf having a intense discuss before their last kiss.

*Bonus: I hope Netflix show us how Beatrice is born, I hope Olaf stay alive and he help her born, and Olaf maybe feels fatherly (?). I really want to see that scene.