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shadowtoons · 7 months

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Worth it-

#Barnaby #billie bust up #billie bust up barnaby #bbu barnaby #barnaby bbu #feeling sick now #but worth it

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angelsaxis · 2 years

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i want all my followers and mutuals to know that if I ever am forced to market this book on here through tumblr blaze i WILL do the gross tropey "no plot only how marginalized it is" bulleted-list of a shit ass advertisement but that's only because it's the only way to get the word out. ill be crying and heaving the whole time

but ill also put out a nice lil blurb of an ad that's like a proper no-spoiler synopsis that you'd find on the back/inside cover of a book

#angel posts #angel writes #feeling sick now

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ansu-gurleht · 2 years

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mistakes were made

#feeling sick now #🤢

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andthebeanstalk · 11 months

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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araekniarchive · 9 months

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@mnvart // Kaveh Akbar, 'Calling A Wolf A Wolf' // @PinkRangerLB on Twitter // @kosmogrl // @devinsturk, '15 Proverbs for the Fellow Chronically Ill' // Jasmine Deporta // Anaïs Nin, House of Incest // the gentle wisdom uquiz by @inkskinned // Rora Blue, 'Sweet Dreams' // Hala Alyan, Dear Layal

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inkskinned · 1 year

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there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

#this is objectively bad advice #don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this #but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries #.... it IS fun #i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him.#bc i used to get SO fucking upset #i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it #and now i just LITERALLY do not engage #instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation #i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection #they like the rush they get from arguing #but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me #so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru #NORMAL CONVERSATION #he doesn't get it yet #i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?''#'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''

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sergle · 1 year

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There’s no shame greater than that of adding a mutual on discord, and then blowing it at establishing regular convos in the early stages. and then it’s been too long. and their name simply sits there....

#why do I do that bro. it's a sickness. a disease #sergle.txt #feel a lil too late now perhaps so i'm just gonna jump in front of this semi truck and see what happen

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iwasbored777 · 8 months

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The height difference in ITSV vs in ATSV is killing me 😭 Miles and Gwen were so shorter than Peter, now they're almost as tall as him

#i remember back when it was weird for me to see them older now it's weird for me to see them younger feels like it's been decades #they were babies #peter b parker #gwen stacy #miles morales #spider man into the spider verse #into the spiderverse #spider man across the spider verse #across the spiderverse #spiderverse #sick of comments how they're standing in front thats not why they look tall they are taller in the second one they're standing #in front of him in both pics #if you didnt see how much they grew up while you were watching sucks to be blind as you #i chose these pics for a reason cuz they're on the same distance from peter in both #but you can tell they grew

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ananxiousgenz · 9 days

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my mental state rn <3

#i fucking HATE HIM #this fucker is my jurgen leitner #that was the most foul description to listen to at 10am #i feel sick now #i deserve compensation #the magnus protocol #tmagp #tmagp spoilers #tmagp ep 12

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duckprintspress · 3 months

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Urgent: Help Us Not Get Screwed

Anyone who follows us has seen us screaming from the hill-tops about our current crowdfunding campaign for Aether Beyond the Binary (17 aetherpunk stories! Outside the gender binary main characters!). We've only got 50 hours left...and we just got screwed.

Our Anthology Kickstarter is being scammed.

About two hours ago, with us still roughly $1,500 from our goal, we got a junk pledge for almost $2,000. This pushed us into being marked as "funded" but there is zero chance it's a real pledge, it's from a shell account marked as being in Turkey. This kind of money doesn't just fall like a miracle into the laps of small business like ours.

The timing on this attack is devastating. The final 48 hours of a campaign are absolutely critical, especially for one as close to meeting our goal as we are. We were very likely to hit our target, but doing so was going to require appeals to y'all that started with "hey, we're so close, please help spread the word." Further, the campaign has hundreds of followers who will get a notification at the 48 hour mark, and many who might have backed to help get us to the finish line will now think "oh, they're there, they don't need me," and not back. Meanwhile, one of two things will happen with the spam pledge: either it will get removed by Kickstarter, which could take hours or a day+, totally nuking us during this crucial window, or it won't get removed until the payment bounces post-campaign, at which point we won't actually have enough money to do fulfillment.

Either way, we are fucked.

Please, please don't let these dipshits ruin the love and passion that 30+ people have poured into this project for over a year.

Our campaign IS NOT FUNDED, and it won't be without help. I'm begging, help spread the word about how we're getting screwed, and help spread the word about Aether Beyond the Binary (visit the link for so much info!) so that we can get enough real pledges to fund this project we've poured our hearts and souls into.

SUPPORT THE QUEER ANTHOLOGY KICKSTARTER FOR AETHER BEYOND THE BINARY (with your pledges or with signal boosts!)

#unforth rambles #like seriously guys i feel sick #this is a disaster #and the absolute earliest KS can do anything about it is in another 2 hours when their offices open #but it will probably take longer #someone else i know running a campaign right now it took 24 plus hours to get rid of an $8k spam pledge on their campaign #we WILL NOT FUND if it takes that long #in my submission to KS support I've begged them to give us another day #but even that's only a stop-gap because we've been advertising as ending tomorrow #there's no fixing this #i'm so upset i'm nauseous

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god-s-tear · 1 year

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That was the sickest, the most twisted and the most unpleasant nightmare I had in a while.

#喋り #feeling sick now

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baph0meat · 2 months

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u should also be opting out whether ur an artist/writer or not. the stuff u post is not less vulnerable just bc u don't think of it as being something that will feed directly into the kind of art/prose generation that has been at the center of most of the discussions on this stuff, and u still deserve privacy and security -- however impossible that may be to attain on the current internet. u may talk to ur friends on here, talk abt ur life on here, some of us share selfies. u should feel as protective of that as anyone feels abt creative works. it matters

#was feeling sick earlier today thinking about. like. commissions i've done that are couple portraits or avatars based on selfies #even filtered thru my work like. thats somebody's face.#we live online. that's the way it is now. the traces of our lives are precious and important to me

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haxxydraws · 6 months

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roadkill angel

#angels #blood #ask to tag #painted #2023 #edit: lowered the resolution to get rid of that ugly link under the pic #i've been trying to get myself to draw for two days straight but im sick so this is the most we get for now #once i feel less like a corpse im going to finalize my comm queue and maybe open up a few more slots

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jacazull · 4 months

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🌟🌟DTIYS TIMEEE🌟🌟

It’s time to do something fun to thank y’all for being here! If any of you follow my sister @vi050iv then you might be familiar with the band au doodles she posted a year ago on insta. Casey, Junior, and April are in a band managed by Sunita, and they sing about triumphs and rising against odds. They’re called The Underdogz 💥I referenced the cover of an idw issue I really like when drawing this~ (pretend I drew a z instead of an s in their banner)

Anywaysss I will doodle some prizes, so there’ll be a deadline (I’ll give plenty of time). Of course you’re free to keep doodling for the band au long after the date passes.

‼️DEADLINE: MARCH 31ST‼️

RULES:

- Please use the hashtag #jacazull1kdtiys and tag me

- MUST HAVE Casey, Junior, April, and Sunita doing something band related (signing autographs, costume fitting, practicing, battle of the bands, posing for an album photoshoot etc)

- You’re free to add other characters or ocs as long as The UnderDogz are there

PRIZES:

1st: Fullbody of any character

2nd: Halfbody of any character

3rd: Bust of any character

All prizes will be lined and colored in flats!

As an additional gift, I’ll be sharing the spotify playlists my sisters and I made for Rise over a year ago. Some songs may be a bit silly or out of place, but we had to compromise a lot LOL. Songs are taken out and added every now and then, but I hope y’all can enjoy them.

Casey: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2cxt5JGKkv5bziUFWF6JAE?si=hU-A4oBoRzqy1Pl6zcsHKQ&pi=u-BT8s5FrWT3CU

April: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6g850asOOGeF4OsPi1Bb8J?si=lEa0b6aASMi7P5OdvApR8Q&pi=u-fq7uj8oLSZGf

Junior: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1j6Rf7mt7Yl5TfMpBRwTOw?si=cBxlZ3KhQxmEQ2aBKxhPqQ&pi=u-ATNIY-fKSwez

Raph: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7Kt2htp2OpXDQgEFiRZnih?si=8q-kCtnBTTmCRQSJLNnMWw&pi=u-aToiW0YOQcSv

Leo: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2ZAWkn0QDysAXZgX7KqNuM?si=JYrB-Dx2Qoqnas-FEl4rUg&pi=u-240kik8DTgO_

Donnie: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5LaxNqoN451ErZQTAb0GUu?si=cdTNkIvjThe_2X15c1aKvQ&pi=u-uR1PkEe4QrSc

Mikey: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/08dBF9Eq6Ouj7yI0NB9zUQ?si=jxkXATyeTB-8bUGrIamR4Q&pi=u-C_fx-iF2TJeB

Okie I think I covered everything. Have lots of fun!!!

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kaogens · 4 months

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sorry for the inactivity.. im sick Can you guys tell

#trigun #vash the stampede #wolfwood #vashwood #testing out csp so idrk what im doing this brush is cool tho🤔#technically this doesnt rlly work for ww bc of his immune system or Whatever but i dont care. im sick so he has to be too #i feel like ive never made any real comics abt them Hello how is that possible #ok bye i gotta rest more now😞

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emgeneticist · 4 months

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shiho doodl instead of bible study #mood #lit

#i was playing projectsekai all morning and now im so disoriented i feel sick and i can't work #i literally have latin and english study tomorrow. I'm so done for #i also have a mock due next monday and i can't study the one subject im stuckon cos GUESS WHAT #gacha hell.#prsk #leo/need #shiho hinomori #project sekai #prsk fa #pjsekai #pjsk #project sekai fanart #my art

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